Dirk Strider, Roxy Lalonde, Autoresponder
Act 6, page 4550-4551
timaeusTestified [TT] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]
TT: Roxy.
TT: Awake yet?
TT: Guess not.
TT: Let me know.
TG: whoaa
TG: damn
TG: hey dirk
TG: hada crazy dream
TT: There you are.
TT: But I see your dream self hasn't returned.
TT: You must be tying one the fuck on tight already.
TG: mybe i am
TG: like a bow of ribbone
TG: on a beiuetuifiul ponny
TT: Man, how can you be this much drunker than last time we talked?
TT: What the hell are you even drinking?
TG: ok but 2 b fair
TG: *beiuetuifiul
TG: was an intentional typo 4 ur benefit
TG: cuz i kno you loves tha po's
TT: It's a beiuet.
TG: so you spyin on me in derse ville again??
TT: Yeah.
TG: fuckin perv
TG: like what you see there? ;)
TT: I see precisely jack shit and a side of fuckall.
TT: That's the point.
TT: You got too sauced up and went rogue again. You're out there in your weird drifting stupor, independent of your waking self's awareness.
TG: you gonna go after me again
TG: get on your hornse
TG: galloop me home like prince charming back to swoon kingdong
TG: *OOOMG blushblushbluh
TT: No.
TT: In thinking it over, it's sort of a relief. Simplifies things somewhat.
TT: It's better you stay out there for a while.
TT: There's been a problem.
TG: whatd you do now
TT: Ok, I fucked up.
TT: I kind of made a mess here, and I'm not sure what to do about it yet.
TG: ??>
TT: No need for you to worry about it for now. I'll figure something out.
TT: Until then I'm just going to prepare for our session, while I think it over.
TG: zzzzzz
TG: what a surprise another mysfery for you to keep to yourself an overly cerebralize
TG: snooorre
TG: hey lets talk about something cool instead
TG: like the dream i had
TT: Ok.
TG: first i had some ordinary boring dreams that i dont remember
TG: but then i dreamed that i woke up from the drema
TG: and things got way bright and surreal
TG: and i saw someone
TG: i think it was supposed to be my daughter
TT: Why do you think that?
TG: you know those dreams where u just know someones suppose to be someone
TT: No.
TG: ok well
TG: regulgar people have those im pretty sure all the time
TT: Are you thinking it was prophetic? Like a glimpse of the future?
TG: i dunno
TT: Because that's not really how the abyss works. It's not Skaia, and we aren't Prospit dreamers.
TT: There's nothing like that out in the abyss. If you drift far enough, there is only horror.
TT: Terrible, terrible horror.
TG: ok but im not sayin it was a futuredream!
TG: it was just a glimple and it felt real and all im saying is it was a cool dream that i wish was real
TG: * glimpse
TT: Well, maybe it was.
TT: Maybe there's no fanciful game-supplied mechanism of prognostication involved here, and you're just an ordinary, run of the mill psychic.
TT: I guess that's possible.
TG: hey dick
TG: *dirk
TG: whaaaat do u think
TG: it would be like
TG: if we had kids
TT: What would it be like?
TT: Inconvenient, mostly.
TG: no i mean
TG: what would they be like
TG: th kids
TG: u ever think about it?
TT: Can't really say I have.
TG: you know for an eccantric guy you can be boring as fuck sometimes
TT: Sorry, Rox.
TT: For what it's worth, I'm picturing them now. A boy and a girl.
TT: Two perfect little freaks of nature raised by people who've clearly got no business bringin' up anybody.
TG: shuuuucks buster its just a fun lil hyphothetical to daydream about
TG: why you need to suck the fun out of shit
TG: like some turd hungry dracula
TG: its not like im lobbyin for you to hook me up with a whole mess of fuckin babbies
TG: or thats im holding on to any such delsusion thats even a remote possibility.....
TG: le siiiiiign..////
TT: Le sign?
TG: yes le sign you heard me
TT: Do you mean * le sigh?
TG: hmm nup
TG: ima stickin with le sign
TG: goign down with the shit
TG: *shi[p
TG: the S.S. LE SIGN, starring cap'n rolal
TT: What does le sign actually mean in this context?
TG: oh come on
TT: Come on what?
TG: LE SIGN IS UNIVERSALLY UNDERSTOOT TO MEAN TOO BAD HES GAY YOU DELIBERABLY OBTUSE DUNDERFUCK
TT: I mean, yeah, that's what I thought.
TT: It would just be cool if you'd refrain from tossing about such antediluvian terms.
TG: antediulivan waht
TG: me sayin ur gay u mean
TT: Yes.
TG: ok but terminology aside i dont think im off base!
TT: I don't see how it has to be a thing.
TG: i rly think its an actual thing bro
TT: Once upon a time, sure.
TT: But the world has changed a lot.
TT: Ever peek in a history book between your wizardly indulgences? This is a nuanced topic.
TG: man i know about the histories
TG: just
TG: believe me
TG: its a thig
TT: How is it a thing?
TG: its a thing beaucase if it wasnt a thing then u wouldnt be all like...........
TT: All like what?
TG: well wantin nothing to do w me 4 starties
TT: Don't be ridiculous.
TT: I have more to do with you than any dude could possibly bargain for.
TT: And I like it just fine.
TG: what a totatly lame + sweet answer simultaneouslay
TG: <3
TT: Yeah.
TT: Now maybe we should direct our focus on a matter which has nothing at all to do with what does or doesn't qualify as "a thing", or what our fantasy alt-universe offspring would be like, or anything like that.
TT: Such as this game, and whether you're in the best condition to be piloting Jane's connection.
TT: Maybe you could use another nap?
TG: my condidions just fine
TG: and anyway
TG: what aint gonna get slept offis the fact that i still dont think we should be touchin this bs witch game w a 20 foot 3dent
TG: we both know her plans need us to
TT: I know that. But I thought we settled this.
TG: its still so frustrating
TG: tellin jane about the dangers
TG: and even if shes being polite i just know she thinks im fulla crap
TG: about EVREYTHING
TT: We settled this too. She'll believe everything eventually.
TT: Why bother working so hard to convince her?
TG: well i dont even do that for the most part
TG: but it gets tiring and saddening
TG: knowing that
TG: even when were not activly talkin bout it
TG: that my best friend cant bring herself to believe some really basic things about my life
TG: like the shitty things the baroness has done to us
TG: or about our upbringin
TG: like
TG: do u know how misrable it is for your bff to doubt you
TG: when you tell her your mom is dead
TT: I guess.
TT: It just registers for me as a reaction which isn't completely unreasonable from her perspective.
TT: She is inundated with media coverage of those whom we've claimed as our parental figures.
TT: That they are not presently alive nor ever played that role for us as she understands it is just an extension of a much more elaborate and far reaching explanation, which is much harder for anyone to digest in its entirety.
TT: Well, anyone who isn't Jake, I mean.
TT: Still say you should cut her some slack.
TG: i know
TT: And need I remind you,
TT: That the potential this game provides for their resurrection is what motivated you to investigate it in the first place?
TG: no i remember
TG: i told u a million tines shit sounds like it could be the best thing EVAAAAAR
TG: * wherein evars capsed as heck
TG: but also that no matter how awesome it might be
TG: its probly gonna advance all the schemes of "her condescension"
TT: Right.
TT: But if we can stop her?
TG: part of me doesnt even want to give her the satsfaction
TG: of startin up at all
TG: like if we didnt wuolndt that wreck her shit just so hiliariously???
TG: so many olols
TT: I must be hard of counting, because I'm barely racking up a single goddamn o-laugh-out-loud at that self-defeating gesture.
TG: no but it would
TG: and for all we know starting it up is playing right in her claws....
TG: could be a trap waintin for jane the moment she enters
TG: if i stop her from playing
TG: maybe i could at leat give her a CHANCE at a future
TT: But there is no future on Earth for them.
TT: Or for us, for that matter.
TG: dunno that for a fact
TG: but anywaaaayyyy
TG: i kinda already
TG: made this bogus file for her
TT: What? Why?
TG: 2 scare the shit out of her
TG: make her learn to fear an respect the fuckin hag like she should
TG: then maybe we can drop this whole in game meetup slash reserection idea all 2 geth
TG: sweet tho it may bey
TT: Rox.
TT: I hope you're not thinking about sending her one of your batshit ~ATH scripts.
TG: on thas sobject
TG: i am miss zuipperpips
TT: Miss Zuipperpips?
TT: The amount of sense you haven't been making is un-fucking-real.
TT: Just go take a nap. And don't even think about sending her that file.
TT: Are you listening?
TG: hnnn
TG: i will take what u say
TG: underd serisous advicement...,
TG: *WONK* ~_?
TT: Jesus.
TG: dirk
TG: when did you stop bein any fun
TT: What?
TG: it use to be youd get a kick out off a slunt like that
TG: *stunt
TT: Man, you know I'm down with insane stunts.
TT: Insane stunts are practically all I'm all about.
TT: As long as I actually AGREE with the purpose they're intended to serve.
TT: Destroying Jane's computer and dissuading her from playing is not such a purpose.
TG: betcha ur responder would agree w me
TG: why cant your be more like him
TT: I am more like him.
TG: i mean MOAAAR like him
TT: You just mispelled "more", causing me to suddenly understand jack everything.
TG: hes more in touch with his feelins
TG: which just makes me L my FA off since hes a bobot
TG: *robob
TG: **bobob
TG: and he can actually loosen up sometimes
TG: kinda like u used to could
TT: I used to could?
TG: for 1 thing
TG: he doesnt insta shootdown a bip of frisky rp shenans now n then ;)
TT: Yeah...
TT: I kind of wish you wouldn't do that with him.
TG: why the f not
TT: It just seems a little tawdry and disrespectful.
TT: And vaguely exploitative of a still-emergent cognitive entity, whose perceptional frame of reference is difficult for us to comprehend.
TG: oh come on
TG: hes cool a guy just liek you its just he lives in some shades
TT: It rubs me the wrong way, is all.
TG: ohhhh
TG: do uuuuuu...
TG: WANT me 2 rub you the right way ;D
TT: Not really.
TG: zzz muh
TG: youre over blowin this
TG: its just an ironic funny thing we do some times
TG: come on im sure you read the transcripts urself
TG: its all alot of jokestery buiishit
TT: He blocks me from being able to read transcripts sometimes.
TG: oh
TG: wow he does?
TG: sneaky bastart
TT: And anyway, I'm really not sure how ironic it is.
TG: ok next time i will run it by the MASTAR first
TG: with his fancy fuckin ironimeter
TT: Ok, here's the thing with the AR, since you still don't seem to get it.
TT: He's very similar to me in thought process and behavior, yes.
TT: But those patterns were imported from a thirteen year old version of my psyche, and then sealed into the program as starting parameters.
TT: In the years since, we've both evolved somewhat. I, as humans tend to, and he, in whatever way is natural for a frequently running, self-aware application.
TT: So if there are differences between us, they're first reflected by what I feel is a maturity gap, and then further by several years of minor behavioral divergences.
TG: omg...
TG: hes 13yo dirk
TG: why did than not occur to me that is so cute
TG: and makes me feel kinda skeevy 4 sayin anything lascivious @ him
TG: dammit you ruin everything!
TT: You're welcome.
TT: Yo, you guys realize I can hear you, right?
TG: pfffffhahaha
TT: Yes, I was aware.
TT: Check out all these complicated fucking problems people have when they have to live in big lumbering fleshmonsters instead of a sweet pair of shades.
TT: Dude, do you think you could sit this one out for a while? This conversation practically doesn't even concern you at this point.
TT: It seems there is some gnarly crooked number that represents the percentage of probability you just said this doesn't concern me.
TT: Even though it's patently obvious that half the conversation, like, way totally concerns me.
TT: Shit, Roxy look. He's doing the thing where he ironically pretends to fail the Turing test to sass me into submission.
TT: Even though I was the one who fucking programmed him to do that.
TG: ell
TG: emm
TG: eff
TG: ayy
TG: OFF~~!~
TG: like my butt is juts there on the floor
TG: is how hard i elled it off just now
TT: (Not peekin' at the floor butt cause I'm only 13 years old, motherfuckers.)
TT: This is fuckin' dumb.
TT: I'm going to leave both of you to interact however you want. I have important shit to deal with and actual responsibilities to take seriously.
TT: Roxy, go nap off your drink, or aggressively wage another flirtlarping campaign, whatever, I don't care.
TT: Just don't send that file to Jane, ok?
timaeusTestified [TT] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]
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