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vaguely-concerned · 7 months

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Thinking about the symbolic weight of smoking in the TLT universe that comes to the fore in The Unwanted Guest -- the way it moves through from person to person: Pyrrha smoked, and Augustine wanted to impress her in all her stone cold fox MILF James Bond glory (and tbf who wouldn't) so he started too. and even though as far as he knows she's been gone for a myriad and is never coming back, he keeps the habit. Ianthe sees something in the hollowed-out Faberge eggshell of Augustine that resonates with her, all that gilded eloquent emptiness and disdain through the ages, so she picked it up from him to try to emulate it. She picked it up so hard that Palamedes -- the exact spiritual antithesis of the 'smoking! on a space station! what a powermove' ennui Ianthe so admired -- spontaneously unnerded enough to even known how to, simply from a sort of contact contamination of the soul.

G1deon and Augustine sharing a jittery smoke after their near-Harrow experience during soup night, and it's the closest thing to any real sense of brotherhood that remains between them. Pyrrha going ten thousand years dying both literally and for a smoke (and then Camilla sold her fucking cigarettes (for a third of what they were worth, probably Pyrrha's own good, and also more importantly grocery money). what an entirely haunted time to be alive etc.). Augustine and Mercy trading a cigarette back and forth in the middle of their collusion over the love and murder of god.

An act of small and measured self-destruction in the name of something a little bit like connection when you're stuck somewhere in yourself where love itself dares not or cannot tread (ritualized, transmissible)..........

#the unwanted guest #the unwanted guest spoilers #the locked tomb #ianthe tridentarius #augustine the first #pyrrha dve #palamedes sextus #this series is going to make me lose my mind completely one day (affectionate)#the locked tomb meta #the fact that ianthe seems to have had some genuine admiration for augustine makes my head spin. of course though.#of course she sees the person who looks the most like he's successfully made himself impervious to the world #utterly untouchable and impossible to hurt because he isn't even really there #and she believes it! even after seeing the john mercy augustine mess at the end! because it's such a seductive idea #when you've stuck yourself in an inevitable ocean of pain to think you could make yourself numb enough that it doesn't matter #it's the emotional equivalent of 'oh there's water all around? well I just won't breathe in then. easy lmao get on my level'#she holds on to that thing from him even when it's been proved to be both impossible and ultimately untrue even in him #because uh. oh I'm about to be kind of sad for ianthe what the fuck is going on. he might actually have been the closest thing #to parental and especially paternal affection she's ever known. certainly known enough to try to model herself after #IMAGINE how fucked up the nine houses must be when augustine the first registers for anyone as a model of psychological survival #ianthe do you really want to be yourself completely so much that you're willing to be nothing. I mean yeah probably but. oh my god #gaining nothing at the cost of everything

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abrahamvanhelsings · 7 months

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the hitch in van helsing's words when he says "i beseech you" im going to cry for real this time. it's not even simply that he knows how important it is that he gets arthur to trust him, that he's conscious of their duty to all living souls and lucy herself to do this to her and how difficult this will be physically and emotionally. it's that arthur now distrusts him, cries at him in anger - arthur, the man who looks like his lost son and whom he loves because of it. the man whose love and respect he may now never get back after suggesting mutilating lucy's corpse. he isn't just desperate for all the men in that room to trust him so they can give lucy peace and keep the living safe. that's the sacrifice of his father's heart splitting in two right there. wtf alan burgon.

#alan burgon owns my fucking life fr every time i think it can't get better and then he's on the next ep and it's like #*holding my heart in his hand* if i squeeze like this i can wring every single emotion you've ever experienced out of you all at once #i had to pause then relisten then pause again b4 continuing #of course arthur forgives him in the end! but vh doesn't know that while he's suggesting this!#he goes up to arthur and suggests cutting off the head of his fiancée and he has to completely depend on his powers of persuasion #(which are off the charts but that's neither here nor there)#what if arthur didn't want to come. he'd only be able to do to lucy what has to be done by dishonouring whatever trust arthur has left #and in any case arthur would always think him mad and awful and never forgive him for anything #i am back on my vh bullshit (i was never off it) yes im being overly dramatic abt it. don't care.#dracula #dracula daily #re: dracula

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cold-neon-ocean · 4 months

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My dogs my beloved dogs!! The first line of beastial spirit vine soldiers from my LoK AU. Created by Baatar when during experimentation, he discovered the spirit energy after being condensed causes the vines to react strangely to machinery and processed material. Turning the inorganic to organic.

These soldiers are comprised of spirit vines that have mutated in reaction to the condensed activated spirit energy and adhered themselves to the suits. Similar to "mimics" in a way, they can conceal their mouths fully so they're indistinguishable from human soldiers, though very astute earthbenders may notice they neither breathe nor have a heartbeat.

#LoK #Legend of Korra #LoK AU: Sovereign Guard #Neon Ocean Art #[ *pointing* looookk my puppies!#they are so 'get your fuckin dog bitch. it dont bite. yes it do' coded you know???#I've had these sketches for nearly 3 years omfg that is how long I've been wanting to talk about them #and this is only series 1 there are other variants including the mecha suits #There is so much more going on with them as well #they aren't sentient they cant think at all #in essence they are funny little plant dudes hehehe #only Baatar and Kuvira know about them and they're hidden throughout their forces #of course they can't do any bending either but that doesn't mean they aren't capable of holding their own #any time you see an immediate security detail around Baatar specifically you can guarantee it's mostly comprised of these #they start out rather simplistic where they just take orders and not much else #but over time they start slowly mutating on their own such as becoming more prone to reacting to Baatar's emotions without him realizing #or taking commands he hasn't said yet #they're also the perfect disposal service for things you want gone and not found #they'll eat anything ]

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bumblingbabooshka · 2 months

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Tuvok & Janeway both strike me as people who insist they aren't rich* but then they bring up a summer house or something in casual conversation *note: I'm aware that Star Trek humans live in a post-scarcity world with no money but still. I can't help but see the truth and the truth is that Janeway's fridge had an ice dispenser.

#It's a very SMALL summer house #I love them <3 #Janeway especially is trying to stop Chakotay from eating her alive. She isn't RICH - she had to get a job. Her father ALWAYS #impressed the value of hard work onto her! (Where was the job?) It's not important. <- It was at a golf course and then interning at #some fancy lab because her dad was an admiral but he SWEARS he didn't pull any strings. Not her father!#Janeway gives off such big 'My father was a self made man!' vibes and I think he absolutely was but that meant she grew up a bit spoiled #and she doesn't want to admit it. Not EXORBITANTLY wealthy but still #Tuvok's 'I had a Vulcan master teach me kal-toh' ass....you had a vulcan MASTER teach you KAL-TOH??????? AT FIVE????#What is there to TEACH????????#I'm strangling him like bart simpson <3 #Vulcan Master: Hello (Tuvok's dad). I have conquered all emotions and have at my disposal knowledge which the common Vulcan could never-#Tuvok's Dad: Wonderful. Please teach my toddler Kal-Toh.#Vulcan Master:..................T he game Kal-Toh? / Tuvok's Dad: Yes.#star trek voyager #Kathryn Janeway #Tuvok #Janeway & Tuvok are the prince and princess of Voyager in that order

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moeblob · 27 days

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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

#my characters #waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit #deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee #and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name #deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c #man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while #he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair #ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so #its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons #but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me #and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not #fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew #and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable #while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts #and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed #so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en #so you know maybe its that idk #and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now #and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it #and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad #that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal #and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it #the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer #anyway story time in the tags again #im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note #its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him #he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times #and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea #and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you

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thebirdandhersong · 3 months

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alas babes I literally cannot defend this man's name anymore except in the name of ignorance which. you can only claim ignorance for so long

#we established boundaries! no texting! limited contact! no teasing!#and what does he do the day i get sick. text me AND tease me through text #he's texted five times since (as in initiated conversation) and like. yeah i mean he's abnormally clueless but considering we had a whole #conversation where i explicitly said hey. i NEED the space. i need space if we're going to keep being friends #this is all a bit much :-)#thankfully i am 90% over him so this is not as painful as it would've been last month but sheeeeesh #i can't even defend him to my friends at this point because when i show them the texts they go what the actual hey is going on #i don't know if it's a matter of ignorance or lack of consideration or him trying to make things go back to normal #(except 'normal' for him was the time when i was crying like every day because i couldn't handle the emotional intimacy #of our strange friendship) or just sheer carelessness but mannnn what a situation #he told me that if he crosses a line to let him know and he'll course correct which like. yeah i mean i WAS thankful for that #but at the same time why is it my responsibility to draw the line why aren't YOU helping observe the line that #i drew earlier this month what is going ONNNN

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coquelicoq · 3 months

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I hugged the two children while looking around at my companions. [...] Shin Yoosung asked me, "Grandmother? Is Grandmother Sookyung okay?" "I think she should be fine. It is entering the final stages." Relief passed through the party member's faces at my words. Only one face was different. "Hey, why is Dokja hyung's mother your grandmother?" "Ahjussi's mother is my grandmother." "Dokja hyung isn't your father." I quickly patted them on the back. "Now now, don't fight. You can both call her grandmother." "Really? Can I?" "Yes." I watched the red-faced Lee Gilyoung and Shin Yoosung and tried to say something else, but quickly closed my mouth. To these children, what had happened in the past three years? What did these children hear, see and talk about as they passed through dozens of scenarios without me? "…Hyung?" I stroked Lee Gilyoung's head for a long time and Lee Gilyoung looked up at me helplessly. Shin Yoosung, who was staring at the scene, grabbed my hand and placed it on her head. (Chapter 343)

they love you they love you they love you

#kdj: actively having a breakdown because two people he loves almost died/are dying #plus he abandoned his kids & they had to grow up & suffer adversity w/o him & he's thinking about how he can never make that right #meanwhile sys: i see you are patting lee gilyoung's head and not mine. not on my watch bucko #you don't have to make it right! they just want you to love them and to be able to love you in return #and to fight over you of course. but luckily you have two arms #and can hug them both at the same time #maybe that's why he was a squid. what a big number of arms you have grandmother. all the better to hug you with my dears #i still can't get over squid!kdj falling to his knees in front of his kid and her reaching out and touching his head #this book is making me so fucking emotional this is unacceptable #orv #kdj #sys #lgy #omniscient reader's viewpoint #my posts

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aq2003 · 6 months

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in case anyone is curious. doctor who crew aggravating david tennant's back problems for the stupidest scene ever

#dr who #david tennant #i fucking forgot about 'i'm gonna make him suffer in every way possible' of course you would say that rtd.#the emotional whiplash i had watching this going 'oh they got a dummy. good for him ok maybe they only did one take w david actually there'#and then it cuts to david going 'yeah i had to do most of it myself'#(not included in this video is a full extra minute of takes of him getting wheeled down the stairs like 5 more times)#10 era

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 10 months

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Reading your tags it seems you’re the type to get cuteness aggression with Wally lol

homie i get cuteness aggression with Everything

#ngl most of my emotions find a way to translate into some flavor of Violence or Anger #internally of course.#BUT YEAH AGH HE DOES BRING IT OUT A LIL MORE THAN USUAL #i look at wally. i get the impulse to rip him in half and repurpose his stuffing into a new cat toy #& the fuckin. you would not BELIEVE the rant i just had in my kitchen over laughingstock #twas Advanced Cuteness Aggression #WHY ARE ALL THE WELCOME HOME CHARACTERS SO AGASHKJEFANJA I NEED TO BLEND THEM ALL INTO A SMOOTHIE #and then pour that smoothie into water balloons. and then chuck them at people from the top of a skyscraper #sometimes i think to myself - hey maybe i should try crocheting my own wally or whatever #but then i realize it would be a waste of yarn. id destroy it immediately #i would give in to the urge to squeeze throw throttle bite tear and it would be Decimated #rambles from the bog #but no yeah im totally normal about him. and the others. very sane and peaceful

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theokusgallery · 2 months

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The problem with my art right now is that 1) the little drawing time I have goes to @daily-basil ; 2) I have phases, and am currently deeply unmotivated ; and 3) when I do draw what this blog is currently about (Arsenic) I draw him in a gay way (because I love him deeply) and not like the unhinged person he actually is. I'm sorry I'm so soft about him right now. Yes I want Sunny and him to tear each other apart but they also need to love each other so so so much first

#siiiiiiigh...#im sorry i need him to hold sunny gently and tells him he loves him and yes he'll say it in horrible unhinged ways BUT #poor man who does not know how to love and does not know he can be loved. he is convinced he needs to manipulate people to make them stay #writing down arsenic lore for tosteur like two days ago made me so emotional about him. shaking and crying #there's not even like An Event it's just that his whole childhood sucks and he's never been accepted by anyone and he's so lonely and #(starts crying)#he does horrible horrible things but all he does to sunny truly comes from love. deeply inhumane and twisted love but love nonetheless #(except when he's being a selfish ass who doesn't have any sort of morals and generally doesn't give a shit about other people. of course)#god he's such a horrible person (/simplification) i love him #he does not care about hurting other people and only cares about his own selfish desires #he thinks he can do anything he wants and if other people get hurt by his actions it's not his problem #don't you DARE touch a single hair on sunny's head. not in a 'i care about my bf' way btw.#but because if sunny gets hurt. he has to deal with that and 1) it's boring unless it brings him something and 2) that's *his* plaything.#even when he does nice things for sunny he doesn't make it just to make sunny happy #he does it so that sunny will associate happiness with him and stay.#that's what he thinks consciously at least. he always had ulterior motives for everything he does #it doesn't really make him calculating because it's automatic at this point. it just makes him deeply selfish #my poor little boy who has never had anyone genuinely care about him before...#which doesn't excuse shit of course but hhhh i love him so much.#(D if you see this. this is about the OC not the guy. of course)#arsenic #rant #sometimes i think about nick like a normal person ('he's so awful and interesting') and sometimes i just slhrflfbfb. (cries)

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highfantasy-soul · 6 months

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Dipping my toe into the ofmd s2 finale discourse, so spoilers

Also, if the finale really hurt you and you feel like the writers made an unforgivable decision, then...maybe don't read this and comment all upset? This is just how I viewed the finale, so not saying you've got to be ok with it, but like, also let me feel what I feel too... anyways, disclaimers over.

I think it's such a cool parallel how each of the captain's first-mates went out in very thematically consistent ways to the way they and their captains started out.

Stede was a mythical being - a muppet - a wooden doll who wished to be a real boy. He was firmly in the silly fantasy category of being - nothing he did had any logic (hello sea library that didn't even have little bars to hold his books in place, hello orange cake that used 40 oranges for just the glaze alone) he was sparkly vibes and failing upward through sheer luck (or magic). At the start of Stede's journey, Buttons is there to remind him what piracy is like - mutiny if you aren't a good captain, chewing people's throats out if need be. But Buttons was also there to stare into the sky and feel what was to happen rather than always using data to support his findings.

But Stede wanted to be a hardened pirate.

Ed was Blackbeard - a bloodthirsty, merciless, pirate. A man who was only allowing a single part of himself to be shown/explored. His crew was fiercely loyal, they respected him, and he was taken seriously - because he got shit done through logical actions - logic that Izzy largely influenced. There were always real consequences for Ed and his crew and that's exactly how Izzy liked it. Ed was fascinated by the way Stede and his crew operated in the world and Izzy was horrified by it - you didn't get to be a successful pirate by being a muppet! You got it through blood and struggle - forging your family along the way. You didn't buy your family with a salary and pep talks and you DO NOT WIN DUELS by being so bad at swordplay you let your opponent stab you so their blade gets stuck in the mast and you can win by a technicality!

But Ed wanted to release some of his control and let the whimsy in.

So the characters change throughout the seasons - Stede becomes a 'real boy' and starts to grapple with figuring this stuff out with grit rather than wishful thinking, Ed realizes that the pirate's life isn't making him happy and needs to make a bigger change. Buttons is ready to chew people's throats out with his metal teeth in episode 1, and through the series, he retreats more into the mystical as Stede no longer needs even a hint of his traditionally pirate ways. Izzy realizes Ed doesn't need his harsh advice, it's actually harming him, and Izzy is allowed to release his firm grip on gritty nihilism and explore different parts of himself.

As Stede and Ed grow into their own people, they grow away from what their first-mates need, so their first mates get to truly become themselves. Their trajectories, however, follow the way they lived and what they valued.

Buttons transforms into a bird, being reborn into a new body where he can fully embrace the mysticism without even a hint of gritty reality.

Izzy, he goes out the way he lived - bloody, in battle, the way a pirate 'should'. He went through a transformation as well - one that stayed in line with his character.

To me, it was clear that different characters played by different rules of reality than others - Buttons was a mystical sea witch, Izzy was a gritty 'realistic' pirate.

Buttons became more distant with the crew as he retreated into his mystical being. Izzy grew closer with the crew as he embraced the joys of found family rather than the ever-dangerous life at sea. He embraced the here and now, he embraced - and faced - reality.

Buttons transfigured into a bird because that's how he lived (and how Stede started out) - as a mystical being of the sea, so that is the form his metamorphosis took.

Izzy died in battle because that's how he lived (and how Blackbeard started out) - as a loyal pirate who would fight to the very end, so that's the form his metamorphosis took.

I viewed Button's story as a smaller-scaled foreshadowing of the final episode.

As Izzy's death took place at the end of the season, there was no narrative time to hash out everyone's emotions over it - just like at the end of season 1, they didn't have time to hash out everyone's emotions at Stede leaving them (though with the extended episode count, they did manage to get a bit more in there). Clearly, Season 3 is going to be massively shaped by Izzy's death - just as season 2 was shaped by Ed and Stede's breakup.

We don't know how the writers are going to go forward with the story, and honestly, I don't enjoy speculating on how plot lines are going to be written. But from the writer's comments, it seems to me like there's a good possibility Izzy will still be in the show - and now he's literally buried his past self and is ready for the next iteration of Izzy Hands.