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#he's having a bad time rn but it gets better <333 then it gets worse <3333 then it gets WORSE <33 then it gets better again <33
scattered-winter · 1 year
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it is wednesday my dudes. have a wip snippet. <3
Eddie was nearly halfway home before he could even take in a full breath. His hands were clenched on the wheel, and the wolf was pacing, ears laid flat. His thoughts were a panicked static, and the wolf wasn’t much better.
What am I going to tell Chris? That they had to move again? When they’d already built a life here? A family? Chris wouldn’t want to leave. Hell, Eddie didn’t want to leave, but he didn’t think they had a choice. They never did.
They all knew how this went. They move. They hide. For a while, they’re happy. Then someone finds out. Someone finds out, and then they have to leave before it’s too late. Before someone gets hurt, or worse.
Chris wasn’t even at home, wouldn’t be for days; he was at an overnight summer camp with his science class. Eddie had some time to figure out what to tell him. Chris wouldn’t want to leave Buck.
Buck. Eddie wanted to slam his head into the steering wheel. He wanted to extend his claws and tear the seats to shreds. He wanted to shift and run and run and run until he forgot his own name.
Buck had seen him. He knew. And Eddie had thought about what Buck might do if he knew, when he thought about telling him everything—which had been often. Buck cared about him and Chris, Eddie knew that. He knew that. But he also knew how this went. Buck hadn’t been the first to run, and he wouldn’t be the last.
Eddie spent the evening wondering if he should start packing his things or wait until Chris came home to break the news so they could pack together. He needed to call Bobby and tell him he was quitting. He needed to figure out where their next place would be.
He was supposed to have a plan for this. The next city, the next job, the next hiding place. Because it always, always ended like this. Nowhere was safe, not for long.
But Eddie had started to think maybe this place was safe. That maybe this could be home.
So he didn’t have a plan. It was stupid. It was irrational. It was how people like him got killed.
Eddie shook his head, let out a low growl that wasn’t quite human but he didn’t have the energy to keep a tight hold on the wolf right then.
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sugar-omi · 4 days
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how do u think the our life characters would react to getting high for the first time (and do u think they would prefer smoking or edibles) ((sorry if this is a weird ask idk i’m high rn))
LOL dw about it, send me all the high asks yall like. okay ive projected on cove before. w my one post where they got high n had sex
n I will do it again🫶🫶
cove and derek are like me during my first time getting high, basically has an anxiety attack the first time they get high.
derek because he feels like hes rebelling.. was not emotionally prepared for that.
after that, though, will have a kinda better experience. next couple of times, really only tried it a 2nd time because he was overthrowing and couldn't sleep. can't make any more regrets than he already has so why not get high in the middle of the night?
think it mostly just makes him giggly, and sleepy. also a bit flirty n chatty
cove, just like how he is an anxious/paranoid drunk, transfers to his high. at least sometimes. stays away from substances if he's anxious or sad, anything like that. just doesn't help. makes him feel so much worse
now if he's emotionally stable, and all that. acts pretty normal. mm he's more sassy though, n touchy (somehow?!)
FLIRTY. ohhh he gets flirty fs... yeah he just gets confident n says whatever he wants
baxter. mm he gets weird I'd say. mf starts talking aliens and shit n has deep conversations n revelations
becomes supppperrrr cuddly and clingy. he becomes jus a big ol baby<333
first time getting high, definitely took too much, n is giggly n stuff. just helps him relax, distract from his home life n all his issues. does end up going to bed early because he's very aware of how bad it is to use it as an temporary escape.
now whos a smoker... I feel like cove would surprisingly be a smoker. rolls good but he does prefer edibles probably, although probably is more likely to smoke as he gets older, enjoys the smell and shot gunning with you, also thinks it's easier to control his high
derek n baxter are edible girlies. derek just can't smoke to save his life, coughs like a mf. he's dying. baxter, ion have an explanation, he just seems like he'd prefer edibles a Bit more than smoking, but he's not too picky. or maybe you can shotgun him, he'd like that a lot too
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duchess-kyuupid · 1 year
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hi there
can you write idia’s reaction to his fem or gn s/o singing “good riddance” from Hades (the video game) pls? this song and idia both live rent free in my head rn lmao
have a nice day 😸
OMG You literally made my day with this ask, darling <333 I love Hades, and the first time I heard Eurydice singing it I was nearly brought to tears ToT Of course, I'll be more than happy to fulfill your request, and I hope that you enjoy!! For anyone who hasn't played Hades or just wants to listen to the song anon is referring to, here it is! (The audio comes out too loud for me, so I'd recommend lowering your volume a touch just in case! When I was testing it, the sound was just blaring into my ears and I don't know how to make it quieter;;)
~~~
~Idia Hears Fem! Reader Singing~
[Tw: Soft angst to comfort] *Don't need to know/play Hades to read*
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To say that today has been a bad day for Idia Shroud would be an understatement. It's been one thing after another, each terrible thing piling up on his shoulders heavier than the last. They say that when it rains, it pours- and Idia feels that this statement could not be closer to the truth. He feels exhausted just thinking about how long this day has been, and it's barely even 3 pm! But he's had enough social interaction in all of today to make up for a lifetime of self-isolation. He's tired, his battery has run out- there's no chance that anyone's going to be seeing him leaving his room at least for the next week, and even when he does leave it'll be with his floating tablet.
At last he makes it back to his room, but he's far too tired to do anything but to crawl into his bed and lie there, doing nothing but hope to start feeling better. He doesn't want to see anyone, doesn't want to hear anyone, he just wants some peace and quiet, away from everything that's making him anxious. But apparently he can't even have that, as a sudden knock on his door pulls him away from his sulking. "Big brother, big brother! I have something to show you!" Ortho says excitedly, "I know you'll just love it! Can I come in?"
'I can't have Ortho seeing me like this,' Idia thinks, 'I'm just a useless Housewarden who can't do anything... Ortho doesn't need to see his brother being so cowardly, so utterly worthless that it'd be better if I'd just go back home to the underworld and never see this place again...'
"If you don't wanna open the door, I'll just play it for you from out here!" Ortho exclaims, and suddenly Idia is pulled from his gloomy thoughts when he hears a golden tune ring out from behind the door.
'Farewell, to all the earthly remains,' wait, Idia knows that voice... 'No burdens, No further debts to be paid,' that's the voice of the one person who could make his day even slightly better.
'Atlas, Can rest his weary bones, The weight of the world, All falls away, In time,' That's right, it's you. You're singing. To him.
'Goodbye, To all the plans that we made,' Wait, are you actually outside of the door with Ortho? You're actually here? To see him?
'No contracts, I’m free to do as I may,' Idia heard your voice continue to sing, to ring out beautifully as if your voice was weaving gold through a spindle.
And he couldn't take it any longer. He wanted to hear your singing, not through the door of his room, but right next to him, and he wanted to hold you and have all of his worries from today melt away with you in his arms. He rushes out of his bed and opens the door, his eyes glimmering with hope of seeing you behind it, only for the small smile that was invisibly growing on his face to extinguish when he realizes that Ortho was the only one there.
Ah, and now he feels even worse. His disappointment was so apparent, he didn't even try to hide it when his eyes met Ortho's big, bright, and innocent ones. He felt bad that he was so disappointed that it was his baby brother, because don't get him wrong, he absolutely adores Ortho, it's just-
It's just that today's been really long. He already felt shitty enough. But he should have known that you weren't going to actually be there, after all you were travelling outside of the college for once to see the world of Twisted Wonderland. You had told him before you left that you were going to be gone for a while, which makes him even more miserable, knowing that he won't be able to be with you when he's already so stressed out.
But is it really so bad that he had even a glimmer of hope? The hope that maybe, just maybe, you had decided to come back early and surprise him with a visit?
"There you are, big brother!" Ortho says, unaffected by Idia's visible disappointment in seeing him, "I know that you've been missing miss (Name) a lot recently, so I've got this recording of her singing for you!"
"U-uhm, thank you, Ortho...Where did you even get this recording from?" Idia asks timidly.
"I came across her one day when she was singing on her own in the woods! So I used the recording feature you installed in my programming so that I could show it to you," Ortho states, and even though his mouth was covered, you could basically hear his radiating smile. Idia smiles softly and his eyes soften as he replies,
"Thanks Ortho, would you mind sending me the file? I wanna listen to it through my headphones for a while."
"Of course, big brother! I've already sent it to your phone." Ortho 'smiles' brightly as Idia thanks him and closes the door. And without a second thought, Idia pulls up his phone, finds the recording file and starts to play it through his headphones, drowning out the rests of the world in preference to the sound of your voice.
'No hunger, No sleep except to dream, Mild and warm, Safe from all harm, Calm....' As you sing these lyrics in particular, Idia feels pounds of his anxiety and stress wash off of him in waves. As if your voice itself was a spell, Idia was in a trance. And he feels mild, and warm...He feels safe from all harm...and calm.
'Good riddance, To all the thieves, To all the fools that stifled me, They’ve come and gone, And passed me by, Good riddance, To all...' 'Farewell To all the earthly remains...' 'No burdens No further debts to be paid,'
'Atlas, Can rest his weary bones, The weight of the world, All falls away, In time...' And by the time your lovely song is over, he's already manually repeating the recording. It looked like there was probably an extra two or three minutes of empty sound at the end of the recording, and Idia wanted- no, needed to hear your voice right now, he didn't want to wait like 3 minutes before the song automatically looped, after all he could have listened to your whole song again in that timeframe!
It came to no surprise to him that he accidentally fell asleep listening to you sing. Again, it's been a really, really, long day, and just,, being able to listen to you like this was just what he needed to begin to relax and calm down.
What did come to him as a surprise though, was when he woke up early the next morning and your song was still playing through his headphones. And he felt good, he never knew that this is how feeling truly rested feels like. So as he's lounging on his bed, staring at his ceiling as your song continues to ring through his head like silk, and he figures that he'd listen to the rest of your song one last time, and then he'd get up and get something to eat, or perhaps he'd go take a shower or something.
So the song ends, and he's left with the empty sound at the end of the recording. He sighs and stretches out languidly, and then he starts to move to take off the headphones before he's surprised to hear a startled gasp, followed by the sound of you talking.
"Ortho! Geez, you nearly gave me a heart attack there! How long have you been there for?" "Sorry miss (Name)! I heard you singing and I wanted to come and listen!" "My singing? Oh, it's not that good, really." "I disagree! I heard your whole song, your voice is so pretty!" "Why thank you."
Idia hears you chuckle breathlessly. 'Your laugh is beautiful' he thinks.
"Actually miss (Name), do you mind if I keep your song as a recording? I'm sure that big brother would be ecstatic to hear you sing!" "I don't mind. As a matter of fact, I was thinking of him when I was singing it anyway, so it would be nice if you did show it to him. I don't know if I'd be able to sing it in front of him perfectly like that without knowing what his reaction would be.. Oh, but are you going to keep this conversation in?" "Don't worry, I'm not going to!" "Actually, do you think you can leave this in? I wanna leave a message for him, if you don't mind." "Okay, sure thing! I'll make sure that he listens to it."
He hears you walk closer to Ortho, and he's holding his breath as if he wouldn't be able to hear your message if he took even a single breath of air. But what you say, though, knocks the wind right out of him, because he realizes that he's been asleep listening to you talking to his beloved younger brother (and he's so, so happy that you care for Ortho as if he was your own brother too), and that he's been asleep listening to you say these last few words saved for the very end of the recording.
"Idia, I love you."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
LITERALLY this was so cute to write TwT I think this might be my favorite so far.... Eurydice is my comfort character ngl and I spent like this whole morning listening to her sing (even singing along myself to get a feel for what kinds of emotions she's trying to convey) and just generally I had so, so much fun with this prompt. Thank you anon for the request, and I hope that you all enjoyed reading!
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oddball-artz · 1 month
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OMG YOU HAVE SPOONS!!!!!! YIPPIE!!!! (probably bc you got a good night's sleep)
And if you know me at all, be prepared for the sea of questions>:]
1) Go into detail about Dalia and Sabrina and their family in the second Gen au. Any Hcs or stuff?
2) Nyx and his relationship with his family.
3) (idk if it was onyx or nyx who had the ED, I forgor their names are so similar).Go into detail Abt thier ED, tho.
4) For the love of God drop Hcs till I die, I don't care for who, I just NEED them.
And, if you have spoons don't be afraid to look in your inbox for any other asks I may have sent/nf (bc both me and you forget about the asks tbh)
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And as always, ily platonically, man :333
It is not the sleep, I don't need sleep, idk what it was if it wasn't the sleep, but im not being proven wrong /j
I've only got a couple, and they're pretty Dalia centric, but you can have em
Dalia picked up a bunch of tips and tricks for dealing with kids both from helping raise her siblings and from treating kids as a nurse, uses them all the time, her personal favorite thay she's picked up is doubling bedsheets when kids are sick so that if they get dirty you can just take it off and make it a later problem while you comfort said sick child. Dalia is also very sentimental as a parent, cries at every ceremony and graduation. Sometimes she'll say something that sounds like her mother and she goes quiet for a while after that. I have a feeling that Sabrina and Dalia's house tends to be the designated 'safe house' for Vee and Jasper's friends. Dalia's actually kind of happy about this, in her mind it's confirmation that she's not her mother. (This may or may not be based on the fact that my house irl is the safehouse). All I have rn, sorry
Next up Nyx, my boy. He feels like a walking second place trophy compared to all his siblings. Brushes it off in an Rottmnt Leo sort of way, through humor and a facade of confidence. Desperately wants anyone to be proud of him. Takes his little siblings out crimeing™️ together sometimes, and is like the number one supporter of their shenanigans. Let's them steal his shit, as long as they don't get caught(bc he taught them better than that). The only thing he'd put up a fight against having stolen is his binder, but that's about it.
Oh and Onyx is the one with an ED, she has anorexia specifically. It started with her just trying to lose weight, she's fairly light, but her frame is wide, so she didn't see any results and things got drastic from there, especially when people started making fun of her for her body. She's super sensitive to comments about her body, and the bullying just made it so much worse. She hates looking at herself, in mirrors, in pictures, anything. It's like her eyes pick out the flaws every time and she can't stand it. So she's trying to 'fix' herself, much to the worry of the people around her. She eats in the dream bubbles, but that's only because she knows that it isn't real. Harlow noticed this and has started sneaking food into the dream bubbles just so Onyx eats for once. Onyx still hasn't caught onto this.
And various hcs about the sillies
Onyx spins her drumsticks between her fingers when she's bored, she can do it really fast too
Nyx's hoodie he wears in his sprite is his dysphoria hoodie
Gray has a lot of little interests she keeps hidden. They tend to be niche and geeky, so she hides them to protect her image
Nyx can project his voice loud enough to yell over the band
Onyx is only ever quiet when she's flustered or thinking about somthing, other than that there's usually at least a dull chatter coming from her
Onyx is very physically affectionate, she straight up tackle hugs people.
Gray was a pageant kid,and his parents were very competitive about it. They still have all their sashes from it too
Onyx doesn't fight for herself, but if you say something bad about someone she cares about that's when she starts a fight. Starting fights like that is what got her thrown through a window that one time
Onyx is the one who started calling Alison peepaw, and it just stuck after that
When Alison sleeps she doesn't snore, she shuffles through radio channels under her breath, kind of like sleeptalking
Speaking of Alison, he's insecure about the radio affect his voice has
Alison is very protective of the kids she's 'adopted' (usually underclassmen, but they've also taken most of the radio class under their wing)
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nerdyenby · 10 months
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Blue time :D I’m watching Shelby
I love Shelby’s outfit so much, I definitely wanna get that sweater when it comes out
I’m absolutely loving this story time (Shelby wound up picking up a bunch of stuff people (Scott, Ran, Aimsey, Guqqie, Michela, and Jack) left behind after a dinner and couldn’t find who a jacket belonged to, meanwhile Jack asked literally everyone else in the group if they saw a jacket)
Also what a group, them <3
Shelby crushing parkour!!
The gang!!! Team time :))
Skipping tgttos or skybattle is so based, Scott is such a real one
Rocket Spleef
This team is so chill, I love them
Rip, friendly fire
WALLI 😭😭😭
“Im gonna be banned for team griefing” “That would be a first” […] “Hey, I do like to be top of my class” Walli my beloved
“Some would say psychological warfare is worse than physical” 😂
I keep forgetting Red is there, he’s so quiet 😭
Grid Runners
Scott absolutely dragging Walli through the mud is everything I never knew I needed
Best game time :))
They crushed it!!!
Yeah that was so tough for so many people
Battle Box
Watching people be good at bb is never not a great time
“Two more boxes to battle real quick” “Whose boxes are we battling?” I love this so much actually
“Since when are we a battle box team?!??” Since your team was announced and I predicted y’all winning :))
People are cowards, so true Shelby <333
Sands of Time
Imma need Red to be so very vocal this game, I feel like I’ve heard him speak maybe three times this event
Yeah that red path was rough
Solid run, nothing too crazy but they got a safe score
Scott listing Jojo, Aimsey, and H as the ideal sot senseis is so based
NOOOOOO RED 😭😭😭
Everyone making jokes about Shelby’s spilled coke being of the non-cola variety
“Hydrophobic: the only good kind of phobic” I love Shelby so much
Ace Race
“We like to break the mold, y’know, team killing…” “You better not find a way in this game to do that” “Shelby, I like to make the impossible possible” “If you do that, I can’t be anything but impressed about it” Walli’s so fun, I haven’t seen his content but he’s such a hoot in mcc
Shelby calling herself a sheep 😭😭😭
*falls into the void once* “Every choice I’ve ever made was a bad one”
Parkour Warrior
Have I mentioned that I love Shelby
She’s popping off!!!
Ah the hubris
Yeah this event is crazy close
Hole in the Wall
Walli thinking the letters were random 😭
Sky Battle
“It’s just battle box but with everybody together all at once” so true!!
Rip
Walli popping off!!!
Shelby looking both ways before crossing the bridge is inarguably correct but it’s so reminiscent of pedestrian safety I’m cackling
Scott immediately rooting for red :))
Dodgebolt
“I LOVE AIMSEY” so true Shelby!!!!
“Hotguy’s got one” “??” She doesn’t know 😂
“Should I try to reverse psychology the universe?” go for it, Scott, if anyone can it’s him
The absolute comedic timing of Aimsey’s quick shot is everything
It’s Aimsey’s world, we’re just living in it
Walli’s going on Shelby’s dni, real and true /s
I love post-MCC calls with my entire soul
Every social media is just making the best possible changes rn mhm /s
Sincerest apologies to aqua, I’m a loser <333
Also red but they know, I’m always rooting for ran, aimsey, and scar but I on principle refuse to believe in Ranboo actually winning anything /aff
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darlingpwease · 1 year
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shh shshshsh– im happy you do like my writing tho :))) you sound like my friends like that, but it's pinching with them lol
Oh, well I guess we do all do different things for 'me' time. My brain usually shuts off when I do those things lol,, I'm glad that what you do is helps shut off ur brain for a bit :)) I do hope ur work isn't too stressful (I couldn't even forget it rn even if I tried 😒) was it really in yesterday's post?? The only thing I can think of that was somewhat smooth was the Yuuta addiction thing???? Idk–
(I feel like I've aged 10 years because of this haha :')) /hj I know that some of the group members wouldn't be pleased but I'm to drained to really care atm. Good news? We managed to do quite a lot yesterday and now we're just organizing everything. Bad news?? We're all super fucking exhausted and are still stressing that we have a very short amount of time for post. bunny face?? I do, but when you go around being too sweet, of course I get at least a few from you >:(( /t)
I slept in so I think thats a good thing, right?? Once I finish this I'm gonna sleep as much as I can.
...ah... WORM???
I do try to be flexible lol, but I really do like that!! I love when colors mix together well, but things such as earthy tones, nude tones, pastel ones, just soft and/or nature-like colors in general I guess?? are some of my favorites. But I really like different shades of them too,, I also like how they all can correlate to some things or match with things as well, I could go on lmao /neu What?? Of course not!! Do I have to reiterate what I said??? /ht
I can't tell which one would be worse <//333– probably the first one times a trillion well of course I'd stay with the box. I think dying in it would be unsightly tho
-panna cotta
ajshjs don't shush me!!! i'm in great sadness, fruitcake wrote to me again, ahahah, do I have to read and be touched again??? how awful :(((( 🤨🤨🤨 look at him, he looks as if he immediately switched from an anxious mood to a complacent one🤨 that is, it's not pinching with me??? I, I feel betrayed; I will try to follow their example!!! obviously, someone (ex. cocotta) react to the method of punishment more than to encouragement, which is very contrary to what the modern school of management says, you know? it's outrageous 3:<<< /t /hj
... you doing??? my brain calms down only when I don't allow anything to analyze or reflect,,,, If I have to communicate or think about myself, it's always making plans and calculating the best moves — especially if it's games or future... on the other hand, I think if you used your brain more, you would be more tired & would understand the principle of sleep, — and would be taller, — so your brain is more of a curse😔 /t /j [work in the sense of "brain activity", not in the sense of "somewhere where they get money or work experience" — I can still afford the life of a rake😋 not counting volunteering, donating blood, working with some documentation...] (I could say the same about our past messages, but given your forgetfulness, I'm afraid I have to make sure that you remember that you sent me a message yesterday🤨🤨🤨) ... wow, is that your social skills & hint recognition getting... better?😦😧😯😲 impossible...... /t /hj /pos
(apparently, now you're the senior sibling instead of me, huh? /t /j well... but this is the experience of working in a very short time. most deadlines at work will sound like "when did we have to do work?" "yesterday," so it's good if you get that kind of experience early, even if it's, um, not the best way to get it</3 just make sure you're not trying to go ahead of the engine and rest, okay? don't make me crawl out of the blanket to carry you there<//3 yes, a bunny face. when you look with frightened innocent eyes, as if you are trying to convince everyone around you with a more temperamental personality to "attack" you; I'm sure when you're nervous and scared, you make that face ://// /t /hj me? sweet? didn't you tell me I was a 'rotten crumb'? so fickle, so fickle~ don't blame me when we both know it's you too sweet<333 /t)
... does this mean that you will sleep 'a lot' or 'a little'??? because in your case, it has a lot of interpretations, even if I'm sure that this cocotta brain probably assumes "a lot" — I know how cunning you are, I can't let you slip like that ://///
you were caught by the tail of course!!! don't you remember how you agreed to become a worm~?<3333 /100% srs & 100% gen hehehe silly forgetful panna cotta >:3333 /t /j /nsrs
... peacemaker<///333 yes, yes, I realized that you are harmless and accept and love any color & shade, stop being so sweet</3 I myself am about to start caries from you</333 /t /j /nsrs pastel shades and gold are the best honestly but what about snails?🤨🤨🤨 what did you say? what won't you say when you have someone??? I can't trust your words — what if I kiss the already taken panna cotta??? I can't be an 'other crumb', I'd rather be not-kissed and lonely, but proud</33333 /t /j
because it's not one of them!!! I know you don't mind, hey, don't be shy<333 we haven't sorted out your clothes yet and the fact that people are naked under their clothes, so don't be so timid, we still have so much to discuss<3333 /t /j wrong. none of them. you didn't pass this test 3:<<< ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? why??? aren't my pocket and my hands better??? I'm going to recognize this as tyranny and insubordination, besides the fact that you've already shown how unfaithful you are!!! 3:<<<<<<
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meliorist-midoriya · 4 years
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confessions for dummies
the request: HELLOOO KELLEY MY LOVE HEHE feeling sUper soft for shoto rn so could i please request a fluffy fic about him trying to work up the courage to confess to the girl he likes :"))) tHANK YOU BABYYY i love you uwu <333
synopsis: knowledge is power, and todoroki shouto doesn’t know what do to with what he’s learned.
pairing: todoroki x reader
genre: fluff
warnings: n/a
word count: 1.3k
a/n: HIIII SOPH I LOVE YOU TOOOOO!!! i hope you like all 1.3k words of this clueless baby HJSDFHJDSHJ thank you for requesting, and happy reading! the title was inspired by those old “(insert life skill) for dummies” books. does anyone even remember those?
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Todoroki Shouto could say, in confidence, that he had no idea what the hell he was doing.
Learning he liked you was the easy part, the romance-starved girls of 1-A all too eager to jump at the chance of helping him to his epiphany, and an epiphany it was. (He made a mental note to send Tsuyu a thank you gift for keeping the girls from getting too crazy.) All the warm faces, fluttering heartbeats, and clammy hands suddenly made sense now. 
Not that it made them any better. 
If anything, they got worse, suddenly hyper aware of all your little likes and habits and everything in between that had him using his right side more often just to pull the flush from his face.
Now, he was stuck in the limbo in between realized feelings and acting on them. Was this what people called a crush? Pining?
He hated it.
He’s spent all his life hiding how he felt, and now the one time he wanted to let his feelings be known, some unknown force was stopping him.
Every time he got close to confessing, his tongue stalled and his heart stopped, ice colder than anything he could create dripping through his veins and chilling his nerves, freezing him before he could get a word out. Other times, one of the girls would miraculously suspiciously pop in right as he got over that barrier, dragging him away and scolding him for his terrible timing.
So many things to think about, too many. He was forbidden from using the internet as a source like he usually did, so now he was completely and utterly lost. All that needed to be done was make his feelings known, why did it have to be so complicated?
The conflicting information he got from the group he deemed to be his only source of information wasn’t great either.
“It would be nice if you did it under the cherry blossoms-”
“Stop projecting Hagakure, it’s winter already and I think Todoroki’s going to combust from impatience before we get to spring. A sunset confession would be nice though, maybe play her a love song or something.”
“Who’s the one projecting now, Jirou?”
Todoroki pinched the bridge of his nose and allowed himself a quiet sigh. 
This was going nowhere.
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Today was the day.
He was sure of it.
He finally had a moment alone with you, comfortably studying in your dorm room. The only thing he had to do was find the timing.
“Y/N-”
Wait, he didn’t mean to do that. His mind had run faster than his mouth and your name had slipped by accident. Well, might as well go with it and-
You looked up, pretty eyes wide and curious, and the words died in his throat, leaving him with his jaw hanging around the half-formed syllable as his heart did a funny little flip in his chest.
“Yes, Todoroki?”
Just say it, you’re already here.
Alas, his rapidly beating heart pushed ice through his veins and his determination crumpled pathetically in the face of you and the confused tilt of your head.
“C-Can you tell me what you got for, ah, number… 7?” He lamely bluffed, his Quirk not enough to hide the flaming red of his ears that he hoped his hair would cover in its stead.
“Oh! It’s…”
He pressed his face into his hands, barely holding back a groan as you looked away to check your answer to a question he’d already solved.
Today was not the day.
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“How do you confe- Shouto, you like someone?” Fuyumi gasped in shock, emotional at her baby brother growing up. Todoroki was already slightly regretting his decision as he watched her wipe away tears before they shed. Anything was better than going to Natsuo, though.
“Yes. So, how do you?”
“Hm, well…” She stared thoughtfully at the now forgotten book in front of her, “It changes from person to person, I think. What they like, what seems romantic to them, things like that. Overall though, as long as it’s a good atmosphere and you’re considerate of her feelings, I think you’ll be okay!”
Never mind, Todoroki regretted nothing about asking her. That was the most coherent advice he’s received in the past two months. He nodded along to his sister’s words as she continued, absorbing everything he could and comparing it against the advice he’d received before. Slowly, bits and pieces of his knowledge were discarded and replaced, or reinforced. Hagakure’s “romantic” confession idea sailed out the window (honestly, that had been on the chopping block for a while now) and Fuyumi’s broader advice slipped into its place.
So, considerate of your feelings. That part was easy.
Good atmosphere…? Should be easy enough.
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Not easy, actually.
The one thing he forgot to ask was the very thing he was agonizing over right now. He had no idea what constituted a good atmosphere. What made an atmosphere good or bad? The people? The mood? What the hell even defined the mood?
All of this, crammed into the short wander from his dorm to the common room at an ungodly hour. On a normal night, he would’ve slept through the night into the next morning, but nothing has been normal these past two weeks and there were a few nights his sleep suffered from his constant pondering.
Tonight was one of those nights.
He shuffled into the kitchen, blearily rubbing the sleepy blur out of his eyes long enough to find the bottle of water in the fridge. This would help nothing but his dry throat, but that was one fork out of his back, at least. Tired fingers unscrewed the cap and he raised the bottle to his lips as he shuffled his way back to his room.
“Oh, you couldn’t sleep either?”
Todoroki choked on his water.
He painfully swallowed the loud cough his lungs tried to force through in favor of clearing his throat a little quieter instead (still sounded half-strangled, but anything was better than hacking his lungs out in front of you), and turned to the one he didn’t notice sitting in the dimly lit common room.
“Y/N? What are you doing up at this hour?” He winced at his raspy voice, still recovering from the water that went down the wrong pipe, and he cleared his throat again.
“I could say the same to you.” You scooted over, a silent invite to join you that he had no qualms taking you up on. Todoroki slowly realized too late that it was only the two of you, cast in the strange intimacy of shade and moonlight, and suddenly his left side felt a little too warm. Gingerly, he let his Quirk pull away the flush from his cheeks, praying to whatever deity that would listen that you wouldn’t notice the flame licking at his shoulder or the sudden chill at your side.
“So why couldn’t you sleep, Todoroki-kun? If you don’t mind me asking.”
God, if you were the one speaking, he wouldn’t mind anything you had to say.
He pushed down the thought before his sleep-loosened tongue betrayed him again. Alas, where he held back one thing, another slipped past. He pressed a cold hand into his suddenly clammy palm, his racing heart nearly shaking his voice from the force of his heartbeat.
“…Kept thinking about something, and the more I thought about it, the more I stayed awake.”
“Thinking about what?”
He’d blame it on being half-asleep later, he’d blame it on his loose tongue, or on the mysteriously intimate midnight silence of the dorm. He’d blame it on anything, but for now, seeing the moonlight filtering through the tall windows illuminate you in a silvery glow and reflecting off of eyes that he could never seem to look away from, he couldn’t help the answer that slipped past his lips.
“You.”
Todoroki would lament over this in the morning, but the slow realization and joy spreading across your face let him forgive himself just a bit.
He wasn’t the only one thinking about the other, after all.
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ehehehe hEYyyyyy Kokichiii~~~ I, 🍬 anon have returned!!
ik i sent in an ask not too long ago but likE-
i lowkey needa vent rn and srry if this ends up long as hell lmao (feel free to answer this whenevr you want mod no pressure <3 )
just for some context, a few months or so ago (i have no clue lol) i realized that im a trans demiguy instead of being genderfluid because i realized i was forcing myself to accept she/her pronouns cause i didnt wanna be an inconvience to people but i still liked really feminine stuff which is why i thought i was genderfluid at first, but i just needed some time to really think about it yk? also in case you wanna know my pronouns are he/him or they/them <3
aNyWaY sooo a few days ago i bought a chest binder on amazon and not even a day after it arrived, my parents sat me down and asked me why i bought it behind their backs. cause i never told them i bought it in the first place. they ended up practically forcing me to come out to them because there was no other way i couldve gotten out of the situation, and the reactions i got wheerrreeee mixed to say the least. it could've been much worse, but it felt like it couldve gone so muhc better. my mom started crying and said that she'll accept me no matter "whether you have short hair, long hair, or whatever you wear" which like.... lowkey feels transphobic to me??? like being trans (in my opinion) is hardly ever about what you wear or what you look like, wear whatever the hell you want whether its feminine or masc or whatever. all that matters is what your comfortable with yourself yk? it just kinda feels like she has this incredibly shallow understanding of what being trans is and doesnt even want to try to learn more about it. she was also more concerned about the fact that i didnt tell them before hand which in my opinion isnt something i have to do. just because i didnt come to them about it doesnt mean i dont trust them. she said that she doesnt think she'll be able to use my preferred name and pronouns too soo thAnKs mOm. my dad on the other hand was much more understanding, but still said stuff like "your young" and "your feeling lots of different emotions right now" and my mom said similar things as well. bUUuUut it kinda gets a bit worse... the day after all of this happened, for the entire day, my mom completely ignored me, not even bothering to look me in the eye or even speak to me. while she and my younger brother had a full conversation about his day when i got back from school, she never said a word to me. she didnt even talk to me for the rest of the day until recently where she said "good night". IS THAT IT- its honestly like she doesn't care that she practically ghosted me the entire day. id probably understand if she had a rough day and didnt feel like talking, but she was just fine talking to my brother, so now im wondering if she's transphobic. and ignoring someone let alone her own kid the whole day is something thats really really not like her usual self, so yeah. tbh, i had a gut feeling that she had at the very least internalized transphobia, so now i really wish that i had gotten to test the waters first but instead i was flung straight into the deep end of the pool. metaphorically. although, im not completely sure how this will all play out... in the meantime though, thank you so much for listening kokichi~~ <333 can i have some comfort cuddles please? 👉👈
*covers your face in kisses and cuddles you softly*
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“wellll first of all, im super glad you figured that out about yourself!
congratulations! im really proud of you!
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...but im sorry your parents didn’t have a good reaction.
if my child came out as trans, i’d throw them a party and buy them anything they want! buuut some parents aren’t like that....
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sometimes they do accept you but they’re just reallllyyy bad at understanding what’s going on.
orrrrrr they’re transphobic which is totally awful! i don’t tolerate those types of people!
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and you shouldn’t either! you shouldn’t have to deal with dumb people like that or dumb things like transphobia!
you are who you are! and i think you’re amazing!
the easiest thing to give people is respect y’know? and it’s soooo dumb that they can’t give you that right away!
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...you’re valid, whether or not they choose to respect you though!
that’s the most important thing to remember! no one can hurt you if you know how incredibly amazing you are y’know?
and im not lying about that. i think you know me enough by now to know i don’t lie about stuff like that!!
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and yup! of course i’ll give you comfort cuddles!
*opens arms*
you deserve them after all.”
-Kokichi Ouma
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cravingcrazewriting · 4 years
Text
Doubts {Treebros}
A/N- This is for the DEH gift exchange! @sincerely-us They're @unoriginalurl77, and one of their prompts was Evan has a bad day, cue hurt/comfort. Trigger Warning- mentions of cutting
The second Evan can't get out of bed, he knows it'll be a bad day.
He couldn't feel anything. Whatever emotion resigned from the day before had completely left, leaving him feeling numb. Well, emotionally numb. It felt like there was a giant weight of expectations and wants everyone expected from him but he just couldn't.
He couldn't even get out of bed.
"Evan? Aren't you going to get ready?" Heidi knew Evan usually got up early so he had plenty of time to eat and get ready to go. She was a bit worried, but she tried to have a little fun with him, for both their sakes.
"I— I can't," Evan choked out, bunching his blankets up and shutting his eyes tight.
"You can't?" Heidi asked slowly, almost to herself. "Is it one of those days?"
He was freaking her out, making her worry, just like always. She'd have to call in and waste her time. She could be resting but no, no Evan had to have issues, like usual. He had to keep bearing her down, keep being a burden, keep being worthless.
"I'll take that as a yes," oh, he hadn't said anything. Faintly, he registered her sigh and run her fingers through his hair. The familiar touch was grounding and nice. "I'll call in for you, okay?"
Evan could only nod as she pulled out her phone and called the school. He didn't catch everything she said, just that he wasn't going to school. Everything else was faded and a blur. It didn't feel real. Nothing felt real.
After Heidi left, Evan fell asleep for an hour. When he woke again, he saw some eggs sitting on his nightstand, and was reminded of the fact he hadn't eaten anything, from the emptiness of his stomach. He willed himself to slowly sit up from the confines of his blankets, and carefully took the plate onto his lap so he wouldn't spill it (even if he did, he didn't think he was in the right mental state to clean it up).
Heidi always made pretty much everything great, which was a shame she wasn't home as much, but it was a treat when she cooked for Evan. Part of his mind scolded him for making her use probably the last of the eggs when she could've given him pop tarts or something. Evan sucked in a breath and closed his eyes tight, trying to will away those thoughts. He fisted his blankets as he tried to stay calm and not spiral. They didn't use eggs much, anyways. There wasn't a lot of harm done, and they could go a week or two without them.
Once he managed to relax, he set the plate back on his nightstand to put away later and grabbed his phone, and well. He wasn't expecting a barrage of messages.
Con: hey were r u?
Con: r u ok? I'm hella worried
Con: should I get ur math??
Con: fuck it
Con: I'm getting ur math
Con: r u sick? I kinda just wanna skip and come see u
Con: evvvvv please answeeerrrr
Evan shook his head, finding those messages from his boyfriend just a bit endearing. Briefly, he knew it was around third hour and that class was still in session, but he couldn't ignore him, because would Connor get the wrong idea? Would he be bothered by what he'd say? He'd hurt him if he ignored the message because it'd seem like Evan didn't care enough to reply, which was not the case, he did care, almost too much, and then Connor would break up with him, his mom would see how heartbroken he was, get even more worried, and he'd end up being one of those guys that couldn't leave his house due to an overbearing family member.
It was extremely unlikely, but Evan's mind was all over the place that day. Deep down, he knew it was unlikely, but some parts were far too probable.
Evan: Just taking a mental health day. I'm okay.
Evan: You can come after school?? If you're not busy??
Evan: I just don't want to make you skip.
After an agonizing few minutes, he got a response.
Con: hell yeah i'm coming over. Gotta be crazy not to.
Ironically enough, that was enough to make Evan smile a little.
Con: and ur not a burden. Don't care how many times I have to say it, cuz I always will.
Con: I love u, Ev.
Con: <33333
Evan: I love you too, Connor. So fucking much <333
Evan tried to use Connor's words to motivate himself. He was loved, he was loved, he was loved, he stubbornly kept telling himself as he moved to sit on the side of the bed, and elevated himself upwards, stumbling only once to regain his footing. He took the plate and let out a breath.
'Small steps,' he thought to himself. 'Small steps. Take it at one, small step at a time.'
It wasn't anything big, but he made his way to the kitchen, washed his plate with a few others, and put it in the dishwasher for a more thorough rinsing later on (when it was full, at least). Afterwards, he walked out onto his backyard porch, in need of some fresh air.
Evan let out a small breath, leaning against the wooden railing as he gazed at the trees that stretched outwards beyond him. Normally, he would've been freezing, as he was only wearing grey shorts and a long sleeved blue t shirt, but in that moment, it didn't bother him. The only thing he could register was his own thoughts that made him spiral further and further downwards.
'He was completely worthless. It took him hours to get out of bed when it's supposed to come naturally. He can't talk to people, he can't do anything worthwhile. So many people have it worse than he does. He's just a burden on his mom and Connor. He's a burden on Alana, Zoe, and Jared. They don't care. Nobody does. It's all just an act, a sham. Why would they care?'
Evan spent almost an hour outside, crying softly as he held onto his arms. The bitter air was only warming up slowly and slowly, but it wasn't enough for his body. Deep down, he knew he had to go back inside. He assumed he was pretty much guaranteed to get a cold at this rate, but he didn't want anything worse.
Warmth cascaded all through Evan as he re-entered the empty house. His body felt like it was ignited as he got uncomfortably warm. He rubbed at his arms as he went to the bathroom to try and cool down.
He shed his clothes quickly and stepped into the shower, flinching at how cold it was. He didn't have the willpower to change it, though, because really, that was why he went in. To cool off, that was all.
Evan caught a glimpse of his hips and legs. They were barraged with various scars, some short and ending roughly while others were long and carefully planned out. He began to shake slightly, willing his eyes away as he curled his hands into fists. Despite trying to shake away the self deprecating thoughts that clouded his mind, he began to cry. He felt ashamed of those scars, and he wanted to heal so badly. While granted, none were very recent, there had been some lapses he wasn't proud of.
He spent a half an hour inside the shower, occasionally letting a couple of tears drop from his eyes, and once he's out, he feels awful about the time he took, and that the water bill would probably go up because of him.
Evan didn't feel like changing his outfit drastically, as he slipped on some sweatpants to forget about what caused his (second) breakdown in the first place. After he grabbed his phone and a blanket, he curled up onto the couch with said blanket and began watching whatever was on television. He didn't move from his spot, despite knowing he needed to eat lunch, but couldn't find the motivation to.
Con: hey Ev, I just got out and I'm coming to see u rn :3
Evan: You can just come in when you get here. Just ring the doorbell for a forewarning
Con: got it. Omw
About ten minutes after their short conversation, the doorbell rang, and a moment after, Connor stepped inside.
"Hey Ev. Doing okay?" His expression had worry printed all over.
When Evan attempted to reply, he realized he hadn't uttered a single word all day. So, he cleared his throat and said, "Kinda."
"Your eyes are red," one thing Connor was trying to work on was not jumping to conclusions, but he still slipped up more than he cared to admit.
Evan couldn't deny a statement like that. So, he just shrugged his shoulders.
"Can I— is it okay if I touch you?" Connor took a seat beside him, keeping a little distance.
Evan, who didn't feel like using his voice, just nodded.
Connor scooted closer to him, and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "You wanna talk about it?"
Deep down, he sort of wanted to, but at the same time, he couldn't because it was too much. "Um— later?"
"Okay," he whispered, giving his shoulder a little rub. "What'd you need right now?"
"A distraction, p-please?" Evan was shaking slightly, and leaning into his touch.
Connor seemed happy to oblige, as he began talking about stuff that happened at school. Heidi had apparently told his mom that Evan wouldn't be there, but he didn't learn this till fifth hour from Jared, after they'd already established that. He talked about how Alana apparently didn't take mental health days, but that she hoped he'd feel better. Apparently Zoe had been worried at first too, because she informed Connor of a small routine they had. When they were passing from first hour to second hour, they'd cross paths and wave. Connor surprisingly found it nice as they had their own thing.
He then launched into rant about the math teacher, how she didn't know what she was doing, and how easily she gave up on kids. Apparently she told Connor he just wasn't going anywhere in life (that was absolutely not true at all, she said that to other students), and he had to resist the urge to just scream at her with how wrong she was, because that'd just prove her point.
When he was done talking, Evan cleared his throat, "Er, I'm ready, now."
"Okay," Connor moved his arm from his shoulders to grab his hand. He was waiting for Evan to start.
He took a deep, slightly unsteady breath, and began, saying, "This morning I couldn't get out of bed. I just... c-couldn't face the world as the disappointment I am. I couldn't— I couldn't force myself up, everything was just— t-too much."
Evan spared a glance at Connor, who looked upset at this new information, but didn't say anything. He made a gesture for him to continue.
"I managed to fall back asleep. When I woke up uhm, mom l-left some eggs for me and you texted me. So I did all that.. s-stuff and went outside. It just... hit me, that I'm b-burdening everyone, that all of you would be better off without me," Evan feebly rubbed at his eyes. He didn't want to start crying for a third time that day.
He felt Connor's grip on his hand tighten. "Evan, no... that's not true at all. It's okay to need a break, or to break down, because I know you'll get back up. That's what you always do, and that's what makes you so strong. If you... were gone now, I'd be heartbroken. I wouldn't know what to do with myself, but mostly, I'd wonder how I could've helped.."
Evan sniffled, and rubbed his nose.
"You're my light at the end of the tunnel. You help me find my way and keep me going. If I lost you, I’d be lost,” he smiled sadly. “I love you, Evan, and I’ll try to be the same for you.”
He was crying again, but this time, it was happy tears. He pulled Connor into a hug and whispered, “Thank you, Connor. I love you, too.”
And as he felt Connor’s arms wrap around him, he finally felt okay.
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hawberries · 7 years
Text
anons
some of these are from like… 2 whole week ago and im Very Sorry. im trying to get better at replying to anons so please send me your question again if you would still like me to answer it!!
(if you just sent me a nice message, i probably read it 8 times and held my face and im very, very grateful and thank you)
Would you be opposed to receiving a fan letter? It would just be a letter addressed to you plus maybe some fan art/gifts!!             
i would actually be super flattered and honoured wft?!?! i do have a PO box if anyone wants to like, send me a postcard i guess!! I’ll do my best to dutifully reply to everyone!
Leonie Li PO Box 3707 Marsfield NSW 2122 Australia
i was gonna ask about where to print coin purses/pencil cases/glass cleaner cloths from when you did haikyuu merch? i couldnt find anything in the faq ;A;
artscow when they have a sale!
It was amazing seeing you today at supanova, you're just as nice in person as I thought you'd be!
Aaaa I bought a bookmark from you on Saturday and it's really pretty! You did a really good job!! ><
thank you so much! i hope you guys enjoyed the conventions <333 thanks for helping to make my experience so great!
Your art is so SWEEET and adorable. I feel so calm whenever I see it idk but  awesome job on all the work you've put into art! It's really inspiring.
I'm sure you hear this all the time but dear, I think you and your art is amazing and beautiful ^w^            
T_____T thank you s much!! that really means a lot to me that people can feel a Good Emotion looking at my art, and i’m super grateful that you took the time to tell me about it! even if it took me. SO LONG. to get back to you. im so sorr
Damen's dimple! I can't believe i never notice before . It's perfect.
i’ve always drawn him with a dimple so when pacat #confirmed it i felt like all of my dreams had been realised…
just wondering why you can't make cp charms? people have before and yours look awesome!
ah it’s like… a small/individual IP so i wanted to clear it with her before i made stuff like charms. she’s just checking rn!
hi i know pacat is unsure about if you can sell capri merch, so i was wondering if - when/if you do get confirmation, you'll sell the charms and art on your site? i love your art so much and id love prints of it, so would you sell them if you got permission? and the charms too? 
please i’ve already got SO much capri merch DRAWN AND READY TO GO, the very instant pacat says she’s okay with it i’m gonna start selling! i’ve got five charm designs and postcard ideals and i really, really want to make a zine!! my fingers are crossed!
im not too optimistic because she said she’d ask her agent and almost all fan merch is Technically Illegal (just some creators are okay with/unaffected by it), but since tcp is a book series with no visual element to the IP it’s possible that selling visuals will be… okay?? WE CAN HOPE. it’s possible that i’ll make the zine anyway and just sell it at cost or something lmao.
is it bad that i want to marry your (or actually damen's) laurent? he is so beautiful *happy sigh*
laurent is perfect from every angle and everyone wants to marry him
Different anon: there's a lot of things I wouldn't consider nsfw myself, but it was explained to me that nsfw is things a parent would freak out about if seen on their kids computer. And like, it doesn't look nsfw to me but I could see where a parent wouldn't be willing to listen to the explanation.
hey my dude! nsfw is less about what is explicit sexual content and more about what someone would get in trouble for viewing at work or wouldn't want minors to see. you're totally free to feel one way or another about the freedom of the human body and depicting it through art is your prerogative, but tagging nsfw is just courteous. 
ok so like… i understand that nsfw is a vague AF term and could mean anything. i do personally use it only to tag artwork that is sexual in nature because of tumblr’s filtering systems. the thing is, i don’t believe kissy fanart is more likely to get someone fired than any other kind of fanart, if viewed at work where you shouldn’t look at fanart. and i guess i just don’t think a drawing of two men cuddling in bed is particularly damaging to kids? i suppose you can read a sexual implication but i honestly only intend to illustrate some tender affection, and it’s not meant to be at all sexual or erotic.
i’m feeling a bit lectured to because i have a separate blog for R18 drawings that is appropriately flagged and VERY thoroughly tagged, and i am dutifully tagging for nudity, so it’s not like i’m being irresponsible or discourteous. and I can’t shake the feeling that if I was drawing a heterosexual relationship with the same level of intimacy, i wouldn’t be getting these admonishments.
that said, i will definitely try to consider more thoroughly how other people might see my work in the future, and maybe be a little more discerning about which works get put on this blog. i’m trying to keep this blog 15+, so i don’t intend to put ANY works that require a nsfw tag here at all, but i do get that the kind of intimacy i’m putting out might ping the same squicks that actual sex does.
Your art is so beautiful and I've seen a lot of thing for 'Captive Prince' but I've never heard of it before, may I ask what that is.
what's captain prince?
it’s an extremely R18 fantasy-historical romance trilogy by queer australian author c. s. pacat! it’s got some heavy themes (the handling of it ranges from good to tolerable, imo – for a point of reference, it does not get worse than Game of Thrones and is far less indulgent) and it definitely won’t be to everyone’s tastes, but i really enjoyed the romance in it so much. damen and laurent are in love
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