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lostberet · 1 month

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COMING SOON..

⤹˚˖♬୭ 🎻₊˚✧ ﾟ.🍊 HEARTBURN teaser

¡! ❞ You knew, since the very start, that the end of your relationship would come, yet, even after 2 years, you never thought it would end like it did. So, why are you emotional? Now, you stand face to face, and your heart burns. ¡! ❞ disclaimer. Yandere behavior, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness, Manipulative behavior, Violence, Mention of child negation, assault, violence, Sexual themes, If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything. a/n. sorry for not posting, I was in Las Vegas and Disney World. I really wanted to write but I had a world tour :c Let me know if you guys enjoy it! don't forget to like, comment, and reblog!!

|| bts masterlist || entry || prologue >>

“I’m sorry, I really don’t do relationships..” You started, your heart beating roughly against your ribcage. You felt your ears burning and so were your cheeks, but thank god the uniform came with a face mask, “It’s not something I’m.. interested in right now?”

Your voice came a bit unsure at the last part. Were you really not interested? You gulped before clearing your throat, tilting your head to the side, and looking up at the man, “I really don’t need to get involved with my boss’s cousin too.”

The man chuckled, his hand covering his nose as he turned his head to the side, “So, that’s the main reason?” He let out a sigh, dropping his hand back on his side, “I’ll tell you what.”

Your brows frowned and your back straightened, your gut poking your instincts, “Let’s do this, I’ll take you on that date I just offered you..” His eyes stared at yours, soon he let out a chuckle, “then, if you don’t like it, we’ll leave it.”

His hand reached forward, trying to tuck the loose strain of hair behind your ear. You grabbed his wrist to stop him from doing so, a bit too tightly for his liking. He only hummed, “If you do enjoy it, however,” he took his hand back, causing you to narrow your eyes at him, “I want to start a relationship with you.”

His brows lifted a bit as he waited for your answer, “There seems to be a catch to all of this.” You took in a breath, “what is it?”

He only grinned, “You’ll get the contract after the date.”

─── Ξ © LOSTBERET, 2024. prologue >>

#bts fic #yandere bts #bts fanfic #bts yandere #min yoongi x you #min yoongi x reader #min yoongi fic #min yoongi x y/n #yandere min yoongi #kim taehyung #taehyung x reader #taehyung x you #yandere kim taehyung #kim taehyung fic #heartburn ff

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louies-lustyard · 3 months

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girlhood ☹️

#louies lustyard #Have a stomach ache #Because I got a bad grade on my final project #And it’s giving me heartburn #I have a killer stomach ache and im being so brave about it #Someone shoot me ffs

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justjams2003 · 1 month

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Hiii! Super loved your recent work (fast pace) 🩷 I was really hooked and now it's one of my favorite Carlos fics here!

I was wondering if I could request a special part of it? Anything like their life with their kids, their life after carlos' retirement, or something domestic! Thank you 🫶🏻

Hi! I just want to apologize for making you wait for so long. I took a bit of a writing break after finishing Fast Pace. But I got inspired after Carlos won last weekend! Please enjoy:

Summary: Some domestic bliss as you and Carlos pick up your three eldest children after their first day of Grade 1 and kindergarten.

Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Carlos Sainz x Sugar Baby!Reader

Husband!Father!Carlos Sainz x Wife!Mother!Reader

Warnings: Carlos is aged up and is in this request now 41. Age difference. A cute happy family. Even still, manipulation, control, obsession. Carlos tampers with your birth control. Kissing. A very slight mention of alcohol.

Taglist: @httpjeonlicious, @f1lov3r, @messersandmesses, @hollie911, @oriconde08 @thehufflepuffavenger1 @fanboyluvr @thatgirlmj @whyamireadingthis @oriconde08 @depressedriches @roseseraj @skepvids @sain55wifey @distinguishedvoidlady @amatswimming @sachaa-ff @lightdragonrayne @lazybot @formula1mount @fangirl-dot-com @saintslewis @carlossainzwho @lordpercevalcharles @topguncultleader @kitixie @serp3ns0rtiae @hangmandruigandmav @therealone4r @keii134 @dark-night-sky-99 @jax-the-oregonian @hachrinnen @formulaal tjdjindahouse

Word count: 2k

Masterlist

The first year of marriage was amazing. You spent almost every hour with Carlos. Jumping from airplane to airplane, country to country. You were attached at the hip. The media either loved it or hated it...you actually didn’t know. At some point, a PR team took over your Instagram and it was rare for you to ever actually read the comments or news. Any information you’d receive would come from Carlos and his team, after all, they’re all you really can trust.

That was, of course, until, mysteriously, your birth control pills stopped working. It feels like so long ago, the day Carlos picked you up in his arms, celebrating the news of a child. Now, you wait outside the school gates, seven years later, with a much older Carlos but just as excited. His eyes now crinkle up and he has a few grey steaks at the temples of his hair. But he’s not any less handsome.

Especially when his big strong arms holds your daughter in his arms. Your little girl sits perched on his hip. The only other girl in his life, besides you. She looks so much like him. Dark toughs of hair that you’ve combed this morning with the same wavy texture as his hair. Her big brown eyes gleam up with such love at him.

And at the same time, he carries your son in his car seat with the other arm. He’s sleeping soundly, his dummy bobbing up and down as he suckles in his sleep. You’re so glad Carlos is here to help. You were sad three years ago when he decided to retire at the end of the season. But now, you’re so grateful. You don’t think you could do this with him on the other side of the world.

You feel like you’ve been pregnant forever now. Totally accidently five months after giving birth, now you’re 2 months pregnant again. You groan, everything hurts. Your breasts are engorged from breastfeeding and now being pregnant again. You’ve got constant heartburn and nausea. Your hair has thinned and your nails feel brittle. And yet, including all that, Carlos still believes wholeheartedly that you are the most gorgeous girl in the whole world.

Carlos steps closer to you and places a kiss on your temples. “¿Cómo te sientes, mi amor?” When was the last time that you spoke English? You can’t really remember, because now Spanish also sounds like English. “Tired, mostly, I’ve missed the boys all day, it feels so strange without them home.” He chuckles and nods, “It’s strange for the house to be quiet... You think everything went well?”

You smile and turn to the gates, you know Carlos is worried his children might be bullied or used for his name. That they won’t be able to make proper friends, that all the kids would just use them to get into the celebrity world. You had a meeting with the twins and Junior’s schools to handle this with grace.

You can feel the other parents whisper, talking with each other. You feel someone tap your shoulder. You turn, it’s a woman who looks to be your age, 31. Where has the time gone? She smiles and speaks in Spanish, like everyone else where you live. “Is this your first time?” She asks with a kind smile. You return the expression, “No, not at kindergarten. But it’s still as nerve wracking.”

She laughs with you as you begin your small talk. “But, after this we have to pick up our son at first grade, which makes our stomachs turn.” You laugh and lightly graze Carlos’ arm to show who ‘we’ are. “Is this your husband?” She asks and Carlos nods. “Hi, I’m Carlos. I would shake your hand but my hands are a little full.” He says, referring to the children in his hands. He refuses to let you carry anything while pregnant.

“And I’m Y/N.” You shake her hand and she also introduces herself. Then your ear catches the sound of excited children screaming as the first classroom door opens. Your head snaps to the noise and then you see the teacher you had met with walking to the gate with a trail of kids behind her.

You can see your twin boys anxiously scanning the parents trying to find you. And when the eldest of the two do see you, he grabs his brother’s arm and quickly runs over. “Mama! Papa!” They yell and excitedly run over into your arms. They wrap their arms around you, as you bend down and hug them close.

“Hello, my loves, how was it?” You ask, combing the hair out of their eyes. They look a lot more like you than the other kids. “It was fun, but missed you mama.” Dario, the youngest of the two says. Your girl babbles and makes grabbing hands at Antonio, the oldest of the twins. “Papa, wanna hold sis.” Antonio says, Carlos smiles and puts Bianca down on her little feet. Your kids hug each other, Carlos has raised his sons to have the same protectiveness as he has over their mother and sister.

“Come on, hold my hand.” You say taking each of their hands in your own. Carlos crosses the road first and then you. He opens the car door for you. It’s almost ironic for this retired championship formula one driver to now be the one driving a mini-van. It is his fault, he just can’t keep his hands off his wife. Carlos wouldn’t have it any other way.

He buckles each of the kids into their car seat. The twins next to each other in the back and the two youngest in the front. Your youngest, seven month old is the best behaved. He sleeps in his car seat, that is until the twins start arguing, like always. Who had the best lunchbox, who is tallest, who mom and dad like most. Even though, you made sure they had the same lunchbox, they’re twins and thus the same height and like all parents, you don’t have a favourite.

“Oi! Stop arguing, you’ll wake up your brother.” Carlos commands, his tongue moving fast in his home language. It still gets you all warm when he speaks Spanish. “Sorry, papa,” they say in unison. You just sigh and shake your head. “Papa?” Your daughter, Bianca calls out. “Yes, my princess?” Carlos replies. “Ice-cream?” The little girl asks, your heart melts and you’re certain that your husband is also a puddle. “After we pick up Junior, we’ll go out for ice-cream.”

Your kids scream in excitement, causing your baby to start whimpering and then soon crying. “Ai, mi amour.” Carlos sighs and shakes his head, his eyes meet yours in the rear-view mirror while you sit next to your youngest children. You slightly lean over your seat and give him a kiss on his greying temples. “It’s okay, my love.”

You’ve got Raúl, your youngest, strapped into your sling. Bianca sits high on Carlos’ shoulders, daddy’s little girl. Her fingers gripped into his salt and pepper hair. You can’t help but reach up and untangle her fingers. “My love, when did you start going grey?” You ask Carlos, staring into his warm brown eyes. He just laughs and shakes his head.

“Must you point it out? I feel so old compared to the other parents...” He mutters, the other parents are around your age, some even younger. “I like it though...a silver fox.” He once again laughs and sighs. “No, mi amor.” You grin wildly at his reaction. “41 Isn’t that old...” He mumbles and again you just smirk. “I mean, Alonso was still racing at 41...”

That really does get him, he bursts out laughing. “Yeah, you’re not wrong...” Then you feel Dario tug on your hand. “Look, Mama!” You see kids, with backpacks looking far too big for their tiny bodies, come pouring out of classroom. Then your eldest son, you can’t help but smile seeing he’s chatting with other kids. And then his big brown eyes look up and see Carlos, he begins running.

The little boy runs up and hugs Carlos around the legs. Your twins greet their oldest brother. Bianca waves down to her brother from above. Junior gleams up, you remember when you gave birth to Bianca, Junior wanted to do everything for her. He’d carry her around every chance he got.

“Come, papa said we can have ice-cream.” You tell Junior after he hugs you. “Really?” He asks, his eyes beaming up. Carlos winks and then nods.

Ding! Your phone has a notification. You grab your phone on the nightstand. “Who is it?” Carlos asks, coming out of the shower. All five of your kids are fast asleep. You read the text. “It’s Alex.” She and Charles had married 3 years ago, no kids yet. “What does she say?” Carlos asks, lying down in the bed next to you, taking your phone and reading the text.

“Hey Y/N, we miss you, why don’t we go out and party tonight? Leave the kids with Carlos.” She texted in the group chat, and Kika added. “We haven’t seen you in like years now that Carlos isn’t racing anymore.” Carlos just laughs at their antics. He hands your phone back to you. “Do you want to go?” He asks, raising his brow.

When was the last time you went out alone? When was the last time that you weren’t with Carlos? Since he retired...there hasn’t really been a second alone? It would be kind of nice, to talk about something other than the kids... “I’d prefer if you didn’t...” Carlos mutters, he crawls down to your stomach. He gently lifts your pyjama short and kisses your stomach. “Pregnant and all...”

You just smile, combing your fingers through his salt and pepper hair. You pick up your phone and text your friends in the groupchat. “Sorry, girls, can’t have alcohol...🙈” You get a quick reply back. “Again?!” “Didn’t you like just give birth???” Your cheeks go red at their comments. You feel the urge to send them a photo of Carlos kissing your stomach, but don’t. You do, however, take a photo, saving it for later and then put the phone down.

“I hope it’s another girl.” He mutters, placing small kisses on your stomach. You can’t help but smirk. “I hope it’s the last one.” You mutter, playing with his hair. He pouts, placing his chin gently on your stomach. “Why? You look so fucking good pregnant.” He says, lust in his gaze. You just laugh and roll your eyes. “To you, maybe. But I’m telling you, my love, I don’t want to have to drive a limousine to their schools.”

You can see him think for a moment. “You mean it? No more kids?” He says, jutting out his bottom lip and making his eyes gleam. It’s hard to say no to him, but you stay firm, for once in your life. You actually wanted to stop after the twins. Not that you love Bianca and Raúl any less.

But this number six is the most difficult so far. You’re taking both pre-and-postnatals at the same time. “Yes, I mean it.” You say, stern. You’d like your body to be yours again...“Alright, I’ll get the snip. I don’t want you on those damn pills. I can’t fucking stand them, they’re unnatural.” He mutters, his jaw locking...

Huh...Always thinking about your well-being...

“You look so fucking good as a mom. Seeing how much they adore you. It’s hard to keep my hands off you.” He snarls, his kisses on your stomach becoming more sloppy. He trails up to your lips. Capturing your lips in his. So furious and desperate on your lips. “I love you, mi amor. You’re mine. Only mine.”

Request are open.

#Fast Pace #carlos sainz #carlos sainz jr #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz smut #sugar daddy!carlos sainz x sugar baby!reader #sugar daddy!carlos sainz #sugar daddy!carlos sainz x reader #formula one #formula 1 #f1 #f 1 x reader

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kuromiiwonhan · 3 months

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Bts Fanfic Recommendations PT.2

Readers note: Hi everyone! I decided to make a BTS ff recommendation post finally! After reading so many amazing ff’s this year, here are the ones that I have put together so far, many more are to come in the future:) A warning I have is that 99.9% of these contain things such as nsfw/smut, dark themes, mature themes, etc. So this post is 18+, I am not your mother so I cannot stop you from what you read, but I am cautioning you before you continue. Also, almost all of these are members x fem!reader. Hope you enjoy and full credit to all of these authors and thank you so much for your amazing hard work!!! Happy reading:)

**ALL RIGHTS GO TO ORIGINAL WRITERS**

A- Angst F-Fluff M- Nsfw/smut/mature *- Favorites

Jimin:

25 and Virgin(M,F)

Public sex with Jimin(M)

Headrush (it's too sweet) (M) Idol!Jimin x reader

Hands(F)

Heartburn (2) (A)

Taehyung:

All you want(M,A,F) Rich ceo!kth x rich student!reader ****

The red means I love you(M,F?) Yandere!Taehyung x Yandere!Reader

Dickless(M,F)

Fall from grace(M)

Taehyung confessing to an American reader in English(F) Idol!Tae x American!reader

Unnamed(M) Club owner!Taehyung x college girl!reader

Honey(M,F) Whipped!Tae x reader

Fertile(M)

The elevator(F)

The crown that is ours(M) Prince!Tae x Princess!Reader

Good for me(F,M) Bad Boy Taehyung x Wholesome Reader

Cutest bunny(M)

Electra heart(M,F,A) Fake dating au

His special(M) College art professor!Tae x art student!y/n

We will always have Paris(F) Idol au

Depravity(M) Yandere!Tae x Yandere!Reader

Rent-a-boyfriend(F,A) Rent-a-Boyfriend!Tae x Reader

Quiet getaway(M,F)

Puppy Impromptu(M)

The BBF(M) Brother bestie!Tae x reader

Unnamed(M) Sugar Daddy!Tae x Sugar Baby!Reader

With a brush of Fate Master-List(F,A,M) Idol!Tae x Art student!Reader

Knife Play(M)

Sugar moon(M) Art Student!Tae x reader

Pinch of sugar Master-List(M,F,A) Sugar daddy!Taehyung x sugarbaby!Reader

Boy next door(M)

Wanna make a movie(M)

Drabble #2(M) Dog Boy!Tae x reader

Jungkook:

Separation Anxiety Series(F,A,M) Game Designer!Jungkook

Unnamed(F,A) BF!Idol!Jungkook x fem!reader

Season of the witch(M,F) Heartbreaker!JK x witch!y/n

Unnamed(F,A) Idol!JK x reader

1:05 AM(M)

Knot today(M) Alpha!JK x virgin omega!reader

Warm hands pt.2(M) College boyfriend!JK x f.reader

Pink Sapphire(A,F)

Unnamed(A,F)

Rebound Mini-series(F,A,M)

Unnamed(M) Yandere!JK x reader

What if I love you too much?(F,A,M) JK x Mom!Reader

Streams and Sheets(M,A,F) Gamer!JK x reader

Phone sex with JK(M)

Yours forever(M) Yan!popular boy JK x shy!fem reader.

Questions and Doubts(M) Dad!JK x f. reader

Bam and Baby Girl(F) Dad!JK x Mom!Reader

Multiple members:

Adore(M) Tae x Reader x Yoongi

Unusual Suspects(M) Tae x Reader x Namjoon (Tae focus)

Just a taste(M) Rapline x Reader

Wanna watch a sex tape(M) Tae x Reader x Jimin

Two-sentence Horror story(M) JK x Reader x Tae

Two in one(M) Hoseok x Reader x JiminDamn the charcuterie board(M) Jimin x Reader x Yoongi

r/n: enjoy everyone!

#kuromiiwonhan bts rec

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ladylooch · 10 months

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facetime sex with timo!! love u

A/N: First of all, LOVE YOU!!!! Thank you for blessing my inbox with Timo thots. Second, this request is what inspired me to ask people if they wanted to see more of Timo and Emma, because I knew this would fit really well into Loving & Leaving. And those two are such hoes for each other, they would get 🌶️ like this. Hope that’s okay with you, anon!

Also FFS I love these two. Come into my inbox and ask me about them 😭💕

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: SMUT 18+ content, phone sex, swearing, pregnancy, lil angsty

This takes place in the general timeline of Part 5 here.

For the first time since 2012, the Devils have made it to the Eastern Conference Finals. They will have a tough test against the Boston Bruins in the next round, but tonight, we celebrate. Well, as much as we can for being 4,000 miles apart.

“I’m so proud of you.” I murmur to Timo as he lays in his New Jersey bed. I’m in his our bed in Switzerland, propped against five pillows to prevent heartburn from the breakfast I just ate. It’s just about 8:00 am in Switzerland, while Timo is in the early hours of his morning in North America.

“Thank you.” He smiles, blue eyes a bit droopy as he looks at the screen, taking in my freshly washed face. My hair is still wrapped up in a towel to dry a bit more before I blow dry it out. “What does your day look like?”

“Busy. Rhea and I have three site visits scheduled.”

“Hmm, that seems like a lot. Maybe you should-” He frowns before I cut him off.

“Don’t even start.” I warn him. Last time he told me to take it easy began a 24 hour silent protest from me. I only broke it when he sent a large bouquet of flowers that said: I’m sorry. Please call.

“I love and admire your work ethic, baby. I worry about you though.”

“I know. And I love that you worry. It’s… hot.” I trail off. His interest is immediately obvious. I take the towel out of my hair, letting it fall into wavy tendrils around my face. I bring my hands up, fluffing at the strands to give them some volume. My satin robe tightens across my chest, accenting my perked nipples.

“If you really love me, you’ll take that robe off and give me a peak.”

“This one?” I ask, fingering the cool fabric. I let it fall off my shoulder, giving him a peak of one of the top swells. It’s enough to get him to lick his lips.

“Yeah.” He breathes, teeth nibbling on his bottom lip. His eyes are laser focused as I trail my fingertips across my newly bare skin.

“I miss you so much.” I moan to him, laying back against the pillows but keeping my robe slightly off.

“Me too. Maybe we could… play around and help ease some of that.”

I pause before I speak.

“You mean like.. phone sex?”

“Yeah.” I purse my lips together. “It’s getting a bit painful.” He tilts the screen down so I can see his large erection stringing his sweatpants into a tent. I want that buried between my thighs. I clench them together to try and dull the ache for him. It does nothing especially when he gives himself a squeeze over his pants, moaning afterwards. “Please. I miss your pussy.” That filthy word from his mouth makes my inner walls clench.

“Timo… I don’t really know what to do.” I sound breathless, not sincere in my protest.

“Thats okay. I’ll help.”

I glance around the empty room, then sit the laptop down between my legs. My large belly gets a bit in the way and I shimmy down until I’m comfortable.

“Is that good?” I ask him, tilting to look at the angle. He can see everything, but also my double, pregnancy chins which I really hate.

“It’s perfect. You look so good.” I meet his gaze, seeing the adoration as he pulls himself out of his pants. He wiggles his shorts down his hips so he can comfortably stroke himself without holding his waistband. I watch him for a moment, savoring the view of him thickened and large in his palm. “Take your panties off.” He encourages me, gesturing to the triangle of fabric hiding me from him. I maneuver them off, then toss them to the floor. When I spread my knees and stroke my finger tips over my folds, Timo chokes on a moan.

This feeling is foreign, touching myself in front of him when he isn’t here. My fingers nudge my damp folds open for him. I tentatively stroke along the plumed skin, watching Timo lead me on the screen with a steady tempo of pumps.

“Relax.” He chuckles, seeing my eyes screw shut after a few moments of eye contact.

“This is a little weird for me.” I admit. “Have you done this before?”

“No.”

That makes me feel better. I know he is more experienced than me but this feels more intimate than actually having sex. The thought of him having this moment with someone else would hurt. Instead, knowing I’m the only one, increases my confidence. I glide my middle finger along my slit, collecting the wetness to swirl it around my clit.

“Mmm, feel how wet you are for me, baby.” He admires, hand beginning to pump himself faster with his fist. “Fuck, I can’t wait to bury myself in your perfect pussy.” He moans loudly, praising me as I increase my tempo to match him. “Take your robe off all the way.”

“No, my nipples look weird.”

“Babe.” He whines. “Please. I wanna see all of you.” His intense gaze, wet lips and quick strokes on his cock make my oblige. I take the fabric off completely, letting him see me. His moans get louder. “Holy fuck. You look so sexy pregnant with my baby.” Every time I get insecure with this pregnancy, Timo is right there to replace every negative thought with generous praise.

“You like what you did to me?” My tone is breathy and needy, filled with feminine grunts that have Timo buzzing on the screen.

“Yeah. You’re only having my babies right?”

“Yes, T.” I moan as I glide two fingers into my entrance. I thrust them in and out, both of us going silent to hear my slickness coat the call.

“Faster, baby. Wanna come together.”

I quicken my pace, then trail my other hand up my body to play with my nipples. I pinch and stroke until I am bucking into my fingers in desperation. I watch Timo’s hand stroke his hard shaft, the tip beginning to dribble pre-cum down his fingers. It’s so sexy watching him watch me. I bite my lip, then begin to pant as I get closer. I bring my hand back down, rotating my clit with it as I push my fingers deeper.

“Curl up now.” Timo commands, knowing that will get me. My fingers curl. Timo praises me, his voice giving away how close he is as he mumbles a string of fucks. I rub against that velvet spot in me, watching Timo’s jerk white ribbons from his tip, while pretending it’s him that pushes me over the edge. The orgasm that rocks me is exquisite, I shiver and convulse into a sit up before falling back to the bed.

My eyes stay closed, listening to the appreciative groan from Timo through the computer. I swallow, wetting my painfully dry throat. I tilt my face back to make eye contact with him again. His smile is sweet and tender, making a lump form in my throat. “I want you to be here with me.”

“I know.” He whispers, seeing my tears.

“But I want you to win a Stanley Cup too.” I frown, pushing my bottom lip out. I run my hand over the baby as he wiggles around a bit. Timo focuses on where my hand is now, tucking himself back into his shorts with a sigh. I grab the computer, bringing it back so my face is now the focal point of this call.

“I’ll be home soon, no matter what.” We both know soon could be over a month away still. “Then I’ll touch you everywhere.” I close my eyes, imagining that his arms are around me right now. “I’ll hold you every night. Massage your feet and legs and anything else you’ll let me.” He finishes as we both chuckle. “Will you talk to me until I fall asleep? Tell me about your cravings this week.”

“Pickles!” I shout excitedly. “And cream cheese.”

“Yuck.”

“No, baby, it’s so good. You dip the pickle in the cream cheese and then put everything but the bagel seasoning on. Oh my god. It’s everything the baby desires in the world. He gets so happy and literally jumps around. I’m out of a lot of the ingredients though cause that is literally all I ate yesterday.” I chuckle. “Probably won’t be able to get to the store until tomorrow though.”

“Yeah, that might be for the best. You need more protein than that for our big boy.”

“Hush.” I roll my eyes at him. “He’s growing perfectly, so I’m doing something right.”

“You are doing everything right, Em. He’s so lucky you’re his mama. Me too.” I watch as Timo’s blue eyes do a loooooong blink before he opens them, squinting at me from where he lays on his crunched up pillow. His arms are beneath it, phone propped up on his nightstand now, so he doesn’t have to hold it.

I get up from the bed, heading to the bathroom to start getting ready. I need to leave in about twenty minutes. I spend that time chatting about a few more things with him as I work my hair into large, wavy curls. By the time I’m setting everything with light hair spray, Timo is asleep. Puffs of air have his chest rising and falling steadily.

“T?” I whisper, seeing if he is as out as he looks. He doesn’t react to my voice. Instead, a slight snort sounds from his nostrils. I smile, pressing two fingers to my lips then touching the screen. “We love you. Sleep well.” I tell him. With one final glance, I hit the end of the FaceTime call. Then, I’m out the door ready to take on my busy day.

When I get home from my long day, there is an unexpected delivery waiting for me outside our apartment door. I slowly reach down, using the wall as an anchor so I don’t tip over my belly. There is a note attached to the delivery cooler.

For my babies, I love you both so much. Thank you for earlier, babe. It was everything I needed. - Daddy

Inside the cooler is a big jar of pickles, two blocks of cream cheese, everything but the bagel seasoning, and a bouquet of pink, white, and lavender flowers. I tear up, realizing he must’ve woken up in the middle of his night to order these for us. He’s 4,000 miles away and I’ve never felt more loved by him than right now.

“You have the best daddy.” I murmur to our son where he kicks beneath the groceries in my arms. “Let’s go make some pickles and wait for him to call after practice.”

#TM: Loving & Leaving #Timo Meier #Timo Meier smut #New Jersey devils #my writing #hockey fan fiction #hockey writing #NHL writing #nhl fan fiction #writing request

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ainulindaelynn · 7 months

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The craziest symptom of cPTSD is the complete detachment from my own body. I don’t know if there’s a name for that, but if there’s not, there should be.

Warning: much mental health rambling ahead 😅

In a nutshell, there’s a tiny adjustment happening in my house that I’ve been genuinely excited about forever, but realized last night my body and my brain are on completely different pages about it.

Emotionally, I’ve been fine for a long time, but tonight I caught myself randomly sucking in a huge anxiety breath. I did this last week once too, while leaving my tagalong at preschool for the first time, which he was pretty upset about, and I thought it weird then too, because I felt fine at the time. Sympathetic, but personally okay.

As soon as I made the connection, I realized this is much bigger. The source (separation) and the symptoms line up perfectly with the first (ish) event of my PTSD series. Looking back, I think I’ve been experiencing a somatic flashback for a month without realizing. It started during fire season (the second event), and kicked up worse in the last week or two.

Taking stock, my circadian rhythm has been severely fucked up. Executive function is out of whack. My sense of time is funkier than usual. Body dysmorphia has spiked a little. Heartburn. My skin is acting weird. I have people I want to see, but am not responding to? My hair is falling out, ffs. The list goes on and on, but it’s all subtle. I assumed it was related to sleep and season change, but no.

My body is re-experiencing all the grief and strain of the first event in my PTSD series and somehow I have not felt it on the surface at all. Emotionally I’ve been fine. It is the strangest feeling.

I’m always grateful when I finally recognize these weird cPTSD symptoms, because now that I see what’s happening, I can wave the ‘you’re not falling apart, it just feels like it’ flag and give myself permission to listen to my body for a while. Ease back at work. Curl up and do nothing sometimes. Take naps. Meditate. Dissolve into a game when I need to. For short periods, the bare minimum can be a beautiful thing. Finding the bottom instead of fighting it, and use it to come back up in time. That’s the theory at least. It worked with catastrophizing. Just cutting myself slack and backing off for a bit.

I knew I shut myself out of my own emotional experience sometimes, but forgot the body disconnect can be so severe that I wouldn’t even feel it until I was literally gasping for air.

I still feel more like an observer than a participant, but this is a big step.

#mental health #cptsd #ptsd #somatic flashbacks #so grateful for other people talking about their experience #without them I would never have realized this #so putting this out there for anyone else going through it #medical tw #mental health tw #parenthood tw #ainulindaelynn #Spotify

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thecorpselight · 1 year

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A complaint known to the Anglo-Saxons as aelfsgotha (hiccough, or heartburn) was attributed to fairy agency, or perhaps to elfin possession. A Latin charm used to expel it, when translated, runs: "Almighty God, expel from thy servant N. through the laying on of this writing, all attack of the Castalides from his head, from his hair and from all parts of his body". The "Castalides" were the Muses of Classical myth, but the name is used here as a Latin equivalent of the Anglo-Saxon word aelf, "an elf". (W. Bonsor, "Magical Practices against Elves", Folk-Lore, XXXVII, p. 350 ff.)

-The Fairy Tradition in Britain, Lewis Spence, pg. 167

#fairy faith #folklore #folk magic #folk charms #the fair folk #elves #the muses

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cemeteryrocks900 · 2 years

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Fdoe

Buttered noodles- ff challenge

1 1/4 chocolate cookies and an olipop

+vanilla ensure with my dietician

>1k

The food today made my stomach so sick

Seeing my bf tomorrow are we’re gonna possibly get crumbl

My heartburn is so bad and my hr has been going pretty low and it’s scaring me, I feel like garbage

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ouroboredom · 1 year

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Haiku 2OP3: Wk. 17 cc:{FF

121

sharing is caring

popcorn & lawfare, awesome.

wife got a crowbar.

122

heartwarming heartburn;

the worst cats you know fighting

over a hairball.

123

whisper wishes to

a car alarm while praying

for a cannonball.

124

it's eeny-meeny-

enemy, better living

thru chemistry... yeah?

125

dogfaced, temperance

upside-down in the river;

bad bets are calling.

126

watching cicadas

fall out of trees, climb back up,

fall again, harder.

127

stop teaching kids

to fling burning marshmallows

in the air at night.

#365 #haiku #year in haiku #poetry #weekly round up #weekly #haiku 2op3 #being bad at tumblr #are there classes or

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frivolous-pastel · 1 year

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The first time I had a panic attack I had absolutely no idea what it was, so I called my mom but she didn't answer, so then I called my dad and asked him how you tell whether it's heartburn or a heart attack, and then I spent five hours at the er feeling like I was choking with heart palpitations and hyperventilating and eventually hiccups

Followed by SO MUCH embarrassment, ffs

#tw anxiety #and I've never actually had one that bad ever again #because now I know when my throat closes up what's happening #and look at the blue nodding kitty gif #but that initial embarrassment and chagrin has never left me XD

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lostberet · 1 month

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⤹˚˖♬୭ 🎻₊˚✧ ﾟ.🍊 HEARTBURN prologue

You knew, since the very start, that the end of your relationship would come, yet, even after 2 years, you never thought it would end like it did. So, why are you emotional? Now, you stand face to face, and your heart burns.

✒ pair. kim taehyung, min yoongi x fem!reader ↪plot. Your relationship came with a contract, and once that contract ended, you are left to figure out why exactly your heart is breaking. tags. contracted love, one-sided love, family drama, Secret relationship, eventual smut, heart-break, boss x employee, disclaimer. Yandere behavior, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness, Manipulative behavior, Violence, Mention of child negation, assault, violence, Sexual themes, If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything. wc. 1k a/n. Hello cuties! I have officially started this series! But i will also be making over one-shorts and be taking recommendations! like, comment, and reblog if you enjoyed this! it would really help me a lot!

|| bts masterlist || entry || << teaser, Heartburn i >>

Monopoly.

An illegal way to earn money, status and power in the business world. Even the purest organization has the dirtiest undergrounds, the ugliest starts. It all started with Kim Wonshik, Kang Chungae, Min Bongtae, and Choi Jo Young. Arguably, the four masterminds of the businesses in Korea. Building the finest Hotels, Airports, Hospitals, technology, law firms, you name it.

Yet, a group cannot handle too many all-stars. Too many ideas, very different perspectives.

And so, the friends were divided into four rivery groups, yet, it soon turned into three thanks to the marriage between the Min Family and the Kim family. Kim Wonshik, married one of his two children. His prized possession, his princess, his only daughter into the Min family, Min Bongtae accepted, marrying his only son as well, creating a treaty and friendship between the two families. They shared their riches, and soon enough, they all became an actual family.

From those two families, children came into the light. Kim Wonshik welcomed his grandchildren into the family, Kim Seokjin, followed by Kim Namjoon and lastly, Kim Taehyung.

Min Bongtae welcomed his own grandchildren as well, Min Yoongi and Min Ji-hoon, Woozi for short.

“Grandfather, with all respect, I really do not see the point of all of this?” Seokjin stepped forward. The rest of the grandchildren sat on their own couches. Kim Wonshik looked up at his eldest grandchild. “Seokjin, I have built an empire, one in which you will have the honor to have. Along with everyone else in this room.” He started, “what makes you think no one will want to take that away from you?”

Seokjin silently nodded his head, taking his seat. Wonshik then looked towards the Mins, “Yoongi, Woozi, what I am going to say, your grandfather Bontae will take charge of that. It does not make you less than the Kims, understand? Because at the end of the day, your mother is also a Kim!” Wonshik exclaimed, throwing a fist in the air.

Yoongi and Woozi just gave a short nod, Woozi eyeing his older brother for any form of support. Yet, Yoongi only stared at his grandfather.

“Times have changed, my boys.” The elder started, “you all need protection, and I’ve assigned someone to each of you.”

The elder signaled the man standing next to him to hand each of his grandchildren a file. Woozi looked around, his eyes landing on Taehyung, the youngest Kim. “Grandpa, Tae doesn’t have one.”

“That’s intentional.” Wonshik commented, making Taehyung’s eye twitch, his gaze on his grandfather hardening, “He’s a special case.” That’s when Taehyung stood from his seat and left the room.

Each grandson was assigned an assistant-made-bodyguard. In the eyes of the public, they were seen as assistants, and yes, they did complete those tasks. Yet, they were hidden bodyguards, making sure the heirs were safe, sane. By rule, each of the assistant guards were to wear a face mask, to keep them also safe, but to not make them recognizable to anyone, at times, not even their own bosses.

“Goddammit, Taehyung, this is the 5th assistant this month!” Taehyung’s father, Taegeun, commented, rubbing his forehead in frustration. Taehyung only remained quiet, leaning back on the couch. Wonshik let out a sigh, “This shouldn’t be so hard Taehyung, son, just accept them as they go.”

“You gave me the option to choose, you are letting me pick and that is what I am doing.” Taehyung bluntly stated, “We’re not talking about that.. I was talking,” Taegeun dropped his hand, pointing his finger at Taehyung before he yelled, “about the damn assault cases!”

Taehyung only groaned, turning his head away from his farther, “Stop fucking throwing shit at people!” His father hissed. His face was flustered, he looked pathetic in Taehyung’s eyes. “Stop fucking telling me what to do.” Taehyung hissed back.

“You ungrateful son of a-”

“Enough! Both of you.” The elder groaned, rubbing his eyes with his thumb, “and you wonder why your wife hates.. no, despises you..” Taehyung whispered, his father’s brows frowning in anger before he threw himself at his own son.

“Taegeun! For fucks sake!” The grandfather yelled before rushing over and pulling him back from his youngest grandson, “Get the hell out of this room!”

Taehyung fixed his suit, eyeing his father as they both shared a look of hatred. Yet looks nor words would ever express their sour hatred for each other. The room fell silent once the click of the door closing echoed in the room. Yet, silence never brought Taehyung peace.

“You.” The grandfather said, turning to look at the grandson, “you will go to your office and interview this new assistant, and you better not throw shit around.”

That’s how Taehyung found himself bored looking at the files in front of him, unbothered to read them as he only picked a page and set it down on another amount of pages. Anger slowly built up on him with each turn of a page, his hands shaking from wanting to punch, to throw things around.

“You’re not even reading them.” A soft voice snapped him back from his boring habit, his eyes meeting big doe brown ones, “what.”

“You’re not even reading the files.” you stated once again, voice soft in question, tilting your head. You stood a few feet away from his table, hands behind your back, “If you’re not interested, just say so. Don’t waste your or my time.”

Your voice was calm, and smooth, as if giving him advice. He only stared at you before he stood up. He walked to the little bar next to his table and poured himself a drink. He didn’t bother answering you. You rolled your eyes and bit the inside of your cheek as he drank his tequila. Once he finished his drink, he turned to look at you.

He gave you a small smile. Yet the empty and wicked emotion in his eyes never matched his beautiful smile. And just then, he threw the empty glass cup at you. Dodging the cup out of instinct, the glass breaking on the bookshelf behind you. You turned to face him, eyes wide in confusion, “Wh-”

“Don’t fucking tell me what to do, got it?”

You narrowed your eyes at him, biting back an insult before taking a deep breath through your nose and clearing your throat, “got it.” Yet, your eyes threw dodgers at him. Your jaw locks at the small smirk on his lips.

You walked out of the office cursing under your breath as you walked over to the elevator, heading to Kim Wonshik’s office, “5 fucking years of training for this shit?” Your hand reached for the button, and before you pressed it, a hand grabbed your wrist, pulling your hand back. You turned to see the same lunatic stare into your eyes.

“I don’t know if anyone has told you, but you have very pretty eyes.”

And maybe then, you should have yanked your wrist away. Maybe then, you would have saved yourself.

building taglist..

@piercidh34rts,..

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