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ltwharfy · 2 months

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"Bob's Burgers" Season 7 Episode Ranking Rewatch (Long Post)

So, I've been rewatching "Bob's Burgers" from the beginning and ranking the episodes using the spreadsheet that @babsvibes created! If you want to know why I'm doing this or how I view the 1-5 rating scale, you can check out my Season 1 post! If you want to check out any of the other seasons, I've been using the "bob's burgers episode ranking rewatch" tag for all of them.

Now, on to Season 7:

Average (Mean) Score: 4.64

Mode (Most Common) Ranking: 5

Ranking Breakdown: 15 5s 6 4s 1 3

Season as whole thoughts:

Our new first place season (and I think it's kind of unlikely to be topped!) Unlike with Season 4, where I was kind of surprised by how high its average scored ended up being, Season 7 is one that I knew going in had several of my favorite episodes. I remember several years ago, the AV Club had a Q and A asking "What's the strongest 3 episode run of a TV show"? My immediate thought when seeing that : "Bob's Burgers" when they did "Ex Mach Tina" followed by "Bob Actually" followed by "There's No Business Like Mr. Business Business".

"Bob Actually" is a strongest contender for my favorite episode, and when I think of the reasons why (which do, in fact, go beyond "Roudise Kiss!!!!!!!"), I think they kind of encapsulate the strengths of this season. I think "Bob Actually" is a perfect combination of being really funny (everything Flips Whitefudge says; Ms. LaBonz stealing from the school; heck, even Mr. Blevins gets a funny line!), being really creative (giving each of the Belchers their own storylines rather than just an A and B story), and being emotionally satisfying (obviously, this kind of depends on how fond you are of Tinimmy and Roudise and Boblin.)

And I feel like a lot of the episodes of this season have that perfect combination of humor, emotion, and creativity- "Large Brother, Where Fart Thou?" sees the hilarity of Bob and Linda getting high with their account, the innovation of Tina having a storyline where she doesn't interact with any of the other Belchers, and the emotion of Gene being a protective big brother to Louise. "Last Gingerbread House on the Left" features a gunfight at a gingerbread house competition (hilarious!), that uses beautiful slow motion and closeups (creative!), and results in Bob actually winning something for once and giving a great Christmas present to his kids- and Mr. Fischoeder and his weird rich friends (awwwww!)

Obviously, I think the show was great in its previous seasons, but in my book Season 7 is just amazing- a show at the top of its game and not content to rest on its laurels!

Some thoughts on specific episodes (and feel free to ask if you want my thoughts on an episode I didn't comment on):

"Flu-ouise": I loved learning a little bit more about Kuchi Kopi and Louise's other toys! I will always crack up when Teddy says "Mumaluma!" One of my favorite end credits sequences- I love Louise's exuberant dancing and the song- "but the sickness made you better, and I'm glad you didn't diiiiiiiiie!"

"Teen-a Witch": I hope before the show ends we get to see Mr. Ambrose riding his bike to school with a little dog in the front basket.

"The Quirkducers": Along with "The Hormone-iums" this was the other episode that convinced me I should do a rewatch before doing the spreadsheet. One of the cable channels was doing a marathon of the Thanksgiving episodes and I remember feeling kind of meh when this came up- I knew it wasn't one of my favorites. Or I THOUGHT I knew! This is a wonderful episode! There is a good chance I will tear up when Tina starts singing about how "it takes guts to be yourself!" And the Grandpa Potato is hilarious! And Peter Pescadero's women's issues club song is further proof that he is THE great underrated character of the show.

"Ex Mach Tina": So, we can all just agree that Jimmy Jr's musoems are some of the funniest writing on the show, right? And that "Watching You From a Distant Place" is one of the best songs? The way all three of the plots- Tina and J-Ju and the robot, Louise and Gene and Yuli and the robot, and Bob and the banjo- come together at the end is brilliant and beautiful! Tammy and Joceyln's "A.I"-"as if" conversation, followed by Zeke's "you guys are making me feel smart" is possibly my favorite moment for those characters. This episode is really pretty perfect.

"Bob Actually": So, you may not know this about me, because I tend to keep this close to my chest but I'm actually a pretty big fan of Louise and Rudy's relationship. Shocking, right? And I've basically been shipping them since the end of "Carpe Museum", a fact which I have never disclosed before (certainly not in my Season 3 rewatch post). And then they have a Valentine's Day story that ends with them kissing, and I really like that episode. Okay, I probably dropped a lot of surprising info on y'all there so I understand if you need to take a break before reading the rest of this.

"There's No Business Like Mr. Business Business": John Oliver! Gene and Tina eating cat food! Bob training a cat! Bob accepting Gayle for who she is! Mr. Business getting ALMOST as much screentime as he deserves! This is an amazing episode, and I stand by my 2019 opinion that this the two previous episodes are the best 3 episodes run in TV history (okay, well, one of them anyway. I haven't watched all the TV shows! And how would I even know how good their episodes are if Babs doesn't make a spreadsheet for them?!)

"A Few 'Gurt Men": I was surprised how much I enjoyed this one! I'm a lawyer, and a pretty burnt out one at that, so I tend to not enjoy legal shows or movies any more- even comedy ones. But my love of the Wagstaff students and staff trumped by legal burnout and I really enjoyed this episode! Also, I love the episodes that show that Louise and Mr. Frond really respect and care for each other. (That said, I absolutely am not one of those people who sees this episode and thinks Louise will grow up to be a lawyer! She wouldn't last more than a semester at law school. No matter how mature she gets, Louise will never suffer fools gladly, and that's a kind of necessary trait to get through law school- let alone be a practicing lawyer.)

"Like Gene for Chocolate": Meh. Even Michael Jordan didn't make all his shots.

"Aquaticism": I think this is one of the most romantic episodes of "Bob's Burgers"- even more romantic than some of the Valentine's Day episodes. I may love Boblin and Roudise, but honestly it's Roger and Judy that are my real relationship goals at the present moment. Just some kind of sweet, kind of awkward middle aged people finding love...or, at least, a date Awwww. (Also, to again point out the combination of emotion and humor in this season: this is also an episode where the kids convince an aquarium owner to commit tax fraud by creating a religion and it results in an IRS agent jumping in a jellyfish tank...)

"Ain't Miss Debatin'": I love Henry Haber. I wrote a fic about him named after a line of dialogue from this episode. The scene where he goes to pick up Tina for their date and makes small talk with Bob, Gene, and Louise is one of my all-time favorites. Also, the introduction of Duncan, a character who basically makes me laugh with every single line. "Rebuttal? Where I'm from we call it buttle-rubbies."

"The Laser-inth": Maybe the sleeper hit of this season. I remember thinking it was okay going in, but it just really moved me this time around. Bob is just such a great Dad in this episode! It might be my favorite Bob and Gene episode. And the subplot is great too! I love Louise and Gretchen's dynamic: "Pretend you're a little girl." "Pssh. I'll try."

"Mom, Lies, and Videotape": So, I feel like I may have been even more obnoxiously Roudise shippy than usual in this post given that this is the season of "Bob Actually", so if that's bothered any of you, I am sorry, and I advise you skip this comment. Okay, so, this is the first speaking appearance by Chloe or Rudy since "Bob Actually". And Louise makes up a story where they are in a class play that culminates in: 1. Her shooting Chloe with a rubber band and 2. Rudy holding her tenderly in his arms in front of everyone in the auditorium (yeah, I know she's playing his mom and she's dying BUT STILL!) She could've come up with any idea and put any of her classmates in any of the roles, and that's the story she tells...

"Paraders of the Lost Float": Some episodes I know how I am going to rate them pretty early on, others I don't really know til the end. This episode just has a such a beautiful feelgood ending that it moved it from a 4 to a 5. Really, I think it's probably one of the most feelgood endings of any episode of the show. It just makes me so happy! "Hot pants rain dance! Da-da doo-doo rain, I don't know the words!"

Random thoughts (stuff that doesn't affect the ratings):

-So I kind of stopped mentioning first appearances by characters after either Rudy in Season 3 or Felix in Season 4, but it's kind of remarkable how many characters joined this season or later. It's hard to imagine we went over six seasons without having Chloe in Ms. LaBonz's class (and Arnold and Kaylee still aren't there)!

-It's too bad I'm an old person who's more comfortable writing a bunch of words than just making memes, because I feel like this all could've been covered much more succinctly with that "Seinfeld" meme: "You're crying from 'Bob's Burgers' Season 7?"

#bob's burgers #bob's burgers season 7 #bob's burgers episode ranking rewatch #long post

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dasenergi-diary · 1 year

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It would appear Tumblr is dead on 4/20. Everyone got too high and fell asleep. None of my posts got the usual number of Likes.

And since I live/work home alone all week and have no social life to speak of, it's obvious to me how much I use Tumblr for my social connection.

I even got on Facebook tonight, and saw a friend I had dated and greatly admired has passed away. His memorial service and funeral is next Friday.

And Michael has been on my mind a lot today. I'm discovering all of our little connections - like mutual playlists on Spotify that he has deleted. We used to share a Hulu account, he deleted my profile, so I signed-up for Hulu today.

He kept a toothbrush and toothpaste at my place. Today I moved it from the counter, to under the sink.

I miss him so effing much. There are so many places I still want to go to with him, movies I want to see with him, a future together - that will never happen.

It was gorgeous outside today, 82 degrees. And I couldn't motivate myself to leave the house. Not driving anywhere. Not a walk around the block. Not to meditate in my own backyard.

Dinner was chips and salsa with a tangerine for desert.

Depression/Isolation has got me pretty bad.

I did watch four episodes of Bob's Burgers on the Hulu. That made me laugh.

I think it's important to note yesterday was the New Moon. I'm supposed to be tracking the moon cycles and how they effect my emotions.

Tomorrow is Friday, my kids will be coming over. So my mood will be drastically improved. It's also my mother's birthday tomorrow (Friday), but she doesn't want to celebrate it. I thought we were going to visit with her on Saturday. I guess not. But I'll call her again tomorrow to wish her a happy birthday and see if I can get her to change her mind.

Anyhow... I'll let you go now. Thank you for reading.

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br1ghtestlight · 6 months

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20 questions for fic writers

1. How many works do you have on Ao3

2. What’s your total word count?

109,996

3. What fandoms do you write for?

bob's burgers, inanimate insanity and there's like one steven universe fic in there. i have written for other fandoms in the past but not on that account lol (and mostly unpublished)

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

zeke running away fic, genderfluid gene fic, louise hat fic, bob mom fic, tinimmy week fic (the problem with naming all my fanfics after really long complicated song lyrics is that i simply will not actually call the fanfictions by their Actual Name. also not linking them bcuz im lazy)

5. Do you respond to comments?

i always try to respond to comments but tbh people dont comment on my work very often?? i also dont reply to comments on my old account bcuz i dont have access to it anymore

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i dont know if ive ever written anything angsty tbh?? thats not really my favorite thing because it makes me too sad. out of my published fanfics probably the fic about bob's mom wins by default and out of my unpublished wips uhh maybe my louise and tina focused fanfic. it has a happy ending (maybe) but its a real downer at times. or maybe my tinimmy fic is bittersweet depending on how you read it

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

maybe my fanfic where bob gets a garden LMAO or my genderfluid gene fic

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no!!! actually a secret about me in that my almost 10 years posting art fanfics etc online i have never gotten a single negative comment on anything ive made. i feel very lucky :)

9. Do you write smut?

never have and never will (nothing wrong with it in most contexts but im asexual and smut is extremely Not My Thing. i actually tried writing a smut fic once to challenge myself a few years ago and spent like 1000 words describing the way the candles were lit in their bedroom before i realized its simply not for me and thats fine)

10. Do you write crossovers?

no but if my hyperfixations ever gave me an opportunity to crossover maybe?? any bob's burgers character on the infinity train would be hilarious. any hfjone character would be heartbreaking

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i dont remember but im gonna go with probably not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

NO I THINK IT WOULD BE REALLY FUN but im too much of a perfectionist w/ my writing and i would be worried about dragging the other person down with me. maybe if my ocd ever gets medicated idk

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

it depends on my mood but right now i have been thinking abt tina and jimmy jr a lot. not even romantically their relationship is just so interesting. jimmy jr/zeke/tina is also great. marshall lee and gary.... bryce and liam??

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

i have like over 30+ wips so thats probably a lot of them FJDMDMSJSKS something i would love to finish at some point but probably never will is a fanfic about how bob and linda overcame the cycle of abuse with their own childhood memories vs how they are with their kids. maybe i could write that with somebody else and we each do like a chapter at a time (they write linda's memories and i write bob's etc)

16. What are your writing strengths?

people always tell me that im really good at capturing character's voices and personalities and making them feel in character?? i always want my stories to feel like something that could actually happen in-universe and make it make sense with the characters etc. i think part of this comes from working w/ my own ocs and thinking so hard about how different people express and communicate things and then applying that to other characters is easy. and bcuz of how my autism works i can memorize how a person or character constructs sentences and create new sentences inside my head in their voice :D i really pay attention to peoples speaking patterns & how they phrase things

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

probably how perfectionist i am about grammar and using certain words phrases punctuation etc that it takes FOREVER to get anything done. i also think im too wordy. i can turn a fifteen word sentence into a fifty word sentence easily which is great for essays but kinda annoying when you're reading a silly bobs burgers fanfic

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

i dont mind doing it for my ocs but to my knowledge none of the bob's burgers characters speak another language as their native language?? so i cant see it coming up in anything i write

19. First fandom you wrote for?

i dont really wanna say bcuz its embarrassing and i was pretty young LMAO but it was like youtuber fanfic on wattpad (wayy before whatever youtubers you're thinking of they were never famous)

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

hmm either my tinimmy week fic or my genderfluid gene fic it changes depending on the day. right now its my tinimmy week fanfic <3

#txt #bob's burgers #long post #<- im assuming

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bisexualbelchers · 1 year

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hey hey hey

hi sorry i was inactive for like 4 years i was busy dying but there's still a decent amount of u here for some reason and i made a new account so i now follow and like posts from @oofpikachu so follow me there if u wish but this is just a heads up that im back and a whole new bitch but dont worry i still love bobs burgers and im still bisexual

#im unhinged #love ya #personal

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marvelously-liv · 3 months

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man, writing about my personal life with the intent of other people reading it is kind of weird. but i want find people i can connect with. maybe i can try this on threads too? i was also thinking about starting up a youtube account to post vlogs on.

there’s something about the type of vulnerability that this takes, and i have the hardest time talking to people about myself.

so what better way to get over that than by being one of the millions who browse the internet daily, who reposts, blogs, and share their lives with people online? what better way to be real? showcase the ugly moments and the good moments. to be inspired to do what i want and record it for whoever may be out there reading my posts?

i’m twenty one years old, i live in a little “tourist town” in michigan that has easy access to the beaches. i have an amazing boyfriend who i love and have been with for six months. i have an amazing group of friends, and a sense of independence since i’m away from all of my family.

it’s been 15 days since the new year started, and honestly, i just want to reflect on the last year because it was insane and really put me through the ringer. i learned a lot about myself, through mistakes, heartbreak and just life. i want to do better!

maybe because of that, i had this idea to start a blog. so we can go and grow through life together! so i know, and you know you aren’t alone.

it’s snowing. it’s been snowing since friday. we even got into the negatives.

i’m ready for the winter to leave. i’m ready for spring and summer. i can’t wait till the sun doesn’t set until after 8pm. i want the sunshine back, the hot breeze, the fun summer nights out.

i didn’t do much today. this wasn’t really the weather to go do anything in. my boyfriend stayed the night last night so he didn’t leave until maybe two pm, which was so nice! i watched tv (mainly bob’s burgers) and listened to music. today i made teriyaki chicken for dinner with noodles.

my new water bottle came in today so i just got to put some of the stickers i ordered on it. it’s got a very marvel-esque vibe to it so far. i love it. i can’t wait till the rest of my stickers get here lol.

anyways i have to work tomorrow (unfortunately). it’s 9:00pm and i want to get to sleep.

i hope i can get to know people here. make some friends who have a similar interest as me. i hope your worries are shunned and that you get a good nights rest, friends. u deserve it. ❤️

#blog #personal blog #tumblog

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avalon-gardens · 11 months

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Angel Face Book 2 Ch. 2

She's got a following, OK.

So idk if I mentioned it before but I'm modeling these entries after the Transmetropolitan Series it's a comic book series made by DC and Vertigo Comics. It's written by Warren Ellis and they have hilarious intros to each comic. Now, I'm not saying that my intros are hilarious, comedy isn't my strong suit, but I try to be friends with you dear readers because that comic series had that feel to it before each new comic. Angel Face differs from Transmetropolitan because the main character in that comic series is an anarachist reporter and it's set in the future. Angel Face, on the other hand, is set in the 2000's and it revolves around a girl who is trying to get out ahead from a bad situation. Last time we saw Angel Face she had Joey Burgers an owner of a very popular burger joint in the hood simpin all over her. The girl's Only This is taking off last I heard she was charging $500 for face-time calls. I mean can we get a discount code or something out here. The girl has a following, OK.

Angel Face is stripping off her white bikini in front of her phone's selfie cam. She's only in her panties and her decorative bunny ears headband. She finishes the video by blowing a kiss to the camera. She pushes her hair back out of her face. Her choppy hair bob has grown an inch and now includes a blonde highlights. Angel Face checks her Only This account and sees that it has taken off. She currently has a balance of $3500. She also sees that her current top contributor is Joey Burgers with $2000. Not bad for only a week on the platform. She picks up her phone and puts on her velvet robe. She hears a doorbell and walks out to the living room to let Tracy in. Tracy is Escrow's third girlfriend/roommate. Tracy met Escrow at a nightclub. She was an Asian girl who was on her way to a successful medical career until Escrow convinced her to strip because it could make her more money. Money didn't really interest Tracy. She came from a rich family she could fuck off her whole life and still have family members who would rescue her and set her up no matter what happened. Tracy had long hair and pink highlights petite but a great waist. Tracy drove a pink Subaru hatchback and fetishized ghetto boys. She met Escrow two years ago and moved in right away. Tracy had recently left to Japan to visit her parents who had a vacation home out there and now she was back. Angel Face let Tracy in and helped her with the luggage. Tracy sets her purse down on her bed. She asks Angel Face how she's doing. "I'm doing good just taking it easy. It's been a lazy morning so far." Angel Face tells Tracy. Tracy immediately changes her attitude once she starts talking to Angel Face about Escrow. "How has Escrow been?" Tracy asks Angel Face. "Good. I had to go on a date with his boss just the other day" Angel Face tells Tracy. "Joey Burgers? That guy's gross. I hope he didn't touch you" Tracy tells Angel Face. "He didn't. He's actually pretty nice but I didn't like Escrow using a date with me for a couple vacation days" Angel Face says. Tracy lets out a big laugh. "Well as long as Escrow isn't taking you out on any dates I'm ok with it. Come on you're ok. You said so yourself" Tracy answers. Angel Face makes a pouting face and returns to her room and slams the door. "What?!" Tracy yells out.

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handelplayssims · 1 year

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We rise! We shine! We take a Citrus Soak to get a focused moodlet for Meredith as we go into a work-from-home day! It’ll be time to file court documents, aka stay at the computer for awhile, and research current case, going to the library. Let us get to work then, and start out with those court documents!

...both laundry hampers are looking real full. Should probably also do the laundry today as well. After heading off to the library to research the court case. Ohp! Markus is up and he is hungry. Let’s just set some grapes along the floor for him to eat. The things you do for gameplay conveniences. ...I also had him yell at Meredith to simulate that “Moom, I’m hungry!” thing. The thing I circumnavigated but ah well! Annnnd communication level 4 for Markus. Huh. Anyway, let’s gather up some books and toys and head on over to the library!

Annnnd Meredith is hungry and I didn’t even notice. Well there is a grill outside at least. We could have food there, after we research! We research, Markus actually plays with his blocks and gets some good thinking progress and have a burger dinner! To home we go again! Because normally, I do Meredith’s whim but I think we got a lot of laundry piled up. Gotta stay ontop of that laundry!

We did get a call from those new neighbors asking us to come over. If we must. But while she would, we got laundry! And also I wanted to have Meredith teach Markus about Please and Thank You. Because she would raise a well-mannered kid! Also since the temperature is super hot, I figured it’d be fine for Meredith to have an actual clothesline to dry things off with. I’m taking out all these lovely gardening furnishings and just adding in bits and bobs. Ah well!

Oh I should actually mention! This house is called Pour Ellie, and it’s created by cedergrave! It’s a real nice home so I figure it’d slot right in as Meredith’s single solitary life...which isn’t so solitary now! Though I did a thing and gave it to her without actually accounting for the money she would have. Not something I would normally do but hey, Meredith has sway in this small town community. And I like her and want good things for her! And now, for a few brief moments, Meredith has time for herself. And she wants to make a friend! So let’s invite over Simeon. She finds out he’s Gloomy. Well. Snob and Gloomy. What a combo. After some light-chit-chat, we head to bed, though she does find out that Simeon is a Geek after talking about chess with him! And so Simeon gets the pleasure of just wandering around the home doing whatever he pleases while everyone else is asleep. What fun! He finally goes home and all we’ll be left with is-

Neighborhood Watch!

Rachid Mounib in the Mounib household has died. Rachid heard a dad joke and laughed a little too hard.

Ernesto Rebuschatis in the Rebuschatis household has died. Ernesto fell for a cowplant’s cake bait. He could not have his cake and eat it too.

Again, light day so let’s continue on! Meredith arose early due to the need to go overpowering sleep. As it does. With this time, I’m able to make french toast for both herself and her son! And in the small time before work, we can put in another load of laundry. Now here is the question. Will Markus be able to reach the French Toast made for him before Meredith goes off to work? The answer is…nope! Not with wanting to go and sit over on a chair in the living room! Only a few bites before he got sent off to daycare. And now, once more, he needs a bath, a light munch and sleep. Alas, poor Markus. At least he gains skills at daycare. We take care of Markus’s needs and then Meredith’s. And by the time those are done, it’s already bedtime. Except we’re staying up because laundry never ends. Allows us time to raise her fun need at least. And then we can just set them up on the clothesline overnight. So then we sleep! And it’s time once more for!

Neighborhood Watch!

Forgotten Hollow: The Okada household recently moved out.

Newcrest: The Ferhat household recently moved out.

#sims 4 #liveblogging #meredith roswell #markus roswell #was in a xenoblade and splatoon kick so long break from sims but now I return!#...yeah meredith's life is just going to be a lot like this

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vavuska · 3 years

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This girl is right: Freud's mom was a hottie!

Sigmund Freud (aged 16) and his mother, Amalia, in 1872

More about Oedipus complex:

Who were Freud's parents?

Freud was born to Jewish parents in the Moravian town of Freiberg, in the Austrian Empire (now Příbor, Czech Republic), the first of eight children. Both of his parents were from Galicia, a historic province straddling modern-day West Ukraine and southeast Poland. His father, Jakob Freud (1815–1896), a wool merchant, had two sons, Emanuel (1833��1914) and Philipp (1836–1911), by his first marriage. Jakob's family were Hasidic Jews and, although Jakob himself had moved away from the tradition, he came to be known for his Torah study. He and Freud's mother, Amalia Nathansohn, who was 20 years younger and his third wife, were married by Rabbi Isaac Noah Mannheimer on 29 July 1855. They were struggling financially and living in a rented room, in a locksmith's house at Schlossergasse 117 when their son Sigmund was born. He was born with a caul, which his mother saw as a positive omen for the boy's future.

In 1859, the Freud family left Freiberg.

Jakob Freud took his wife and two children (Freud's sister, Anna, was born in 1858; a brother, Julius born in 1857, had died in infancy) firstly to Leipzig and then in 1860 to Vienna where four sisters and a brother were born: Rosa (b. 1860), Marie (b. 1861), Adolfine (b. 1862), Paula (b. 1864), Alexander (b. 1866).

How was Freud's relationship with his parents?

The answer to this question could be found in the letters from Freud to Wilhelm Fliess, a Berlin nose and throat doctor with whom Freud carried on a passionate 15-year friendship. The letters suggested a greater anguish by Freud over the abandonment of the seduction theory and several details about his auto-analysis.

Mothers and Nannies

Amalia was considered by her grandchildren to be an intelligent, strong-willed, quick-tempered but egotistical personality. She has been described as lively and humorous, with a strong attachment to her eldest son whom she called "mein goldener Sigi".

Just as Amalia idolised her eldest son, so there is evidence that the latter in turn idealised his mother, whose domineering hold over his life he never fully analysed.

However, nannies or nurses were always present in the Viennese's bourgeois households. The Freud-Fliess letters attracted attention to Freud's nanny and also to the role played by nannies in the ideal family of psychoanalytic theory. Included in the models that explained the bourgeois family since the nineteenth century, but excluded by analytic theory, the nanny, ever present in Austrian upper-class families, still poses a question to the father-mother-infant triangle. The relevance of the nanny's presence in children's development is fundamental and could introduce themes such as adultery, sexual harassment by the master, illegitimate children.

Freud's interest in nannies began, it seems, with the analysis of the cases that would be known in the analytical literature as those that were in the origin of the 'seduction theory' – and also with his auto-analysis. His interest, though, extended well beyond the time of this emergence, as we will see.

Almost all of his patients had a nanny or nurse – some of them had two, what would lead to a curious unfolding of this character, either in the duo good mother/ bad nanny, or, in a kind of duplication, as good nanny/bad nanny.

Freud's nanny, from whom even the name is disputed, could have been a Czech woman, a catholic, who took him to masses and reproved him for being good for nothing. He wrote:

"Today's dream has, under the strongest disguise, produced the following: she was my teacher in sexual matters and complained because I was clumsy and unable to do anything."

In the next letter (October, 15), Freud registers what his mother had told him about the nanny. Asking her if she remembered the nanny, he got the answer:

"Of course", she said, "an elderly person, very clever, she was always carrying you off to some church; when you returned home you preached and told us all about God Almighty. During my confinement with Anna (two and a half years younger) it was discovered that she was a thief, and all the shiny new kreuzers and zehners [coins] and all the toys that had been given to you were found in her possession. Your brother Philipp himself fetched the policeman; she then was given ten months in prison."

Telling that his nanny made him steal money to give her, Freud interpreted his dream as a reproach for asking money from his patients for his bad treatment of them, in the same way as "the old woman got money from me for her bad treatment." The fact that Freud used his mother's remembrance to strengthen the interpretation he made of the dream –in which he was the thief - doesn't matter here, neither his identification with the nanny, observed by some analysts of this famous dream ("I = She"), but it is relevant to consider that it seems that it was with his auto-analysis that the nanny figure began to be seen as a malignant one or, in the best hypothesis, as an ambiguous one.

What needs explanation is how the theory of the Oedipus complex accounts for the boy's guilty impulses toward his mother but ignores the boy's arousal at the hands of his nurse, especially in view of how much more attention his nurse gets from Freud than his mother does.

Discussing the possible interpretations of Freud's dreams along his auto-analysis, many authors saw the relevance of the nanny's presence in his development until his conclusion that "the remarkable circumstance" is that Freud, in effect, had two mothers, his actual mother – whose nakedness he can only mention in Latin – and his nanny whom he remembers in association with numerous disturbing sexual experiences. Having two such mothers, and the luck of having the 'bad' ugly mother banished from his life when he was only two and a half, allows Freud to maintain a secure split between the internalized good and bad mothers.

Unconsciously, Freud's nurse was his seductress and shamer, his mother the pure object of guilty desire.

Thus Freud's discovery of the Oedipus complex emerges not only from memories of a small boy's guilty, aggressive lust for his mother, but from memories of dependence on her, too – a dependence remembered, however as the seduction of a small bourgeois, Austrian boy by a Czech working-class woman in a province of the Austrian Empire still recovering from the Revolution of 1848.

Freud's father

To begin with the so-called 'seduction theory': in 1896 Freud published a polemic article in which he attributed the origin of hysteria to a sexual trauma suffered by his female – and some male - patients that ranged from sexual harassment to sexual abuse in the hands of a member of the family: uncles (some of whom were revealed as fathers in subsequent publications), brothers, guardians, school colleagues, or nannies. He said that this trauma was "unhappily" caused "too frequently, by a near kin."

In this article he said that in 18 cases of hysteria until then analyzed by him (six men and twelve women), all of them showed this etiology, or cause, of the condition.

By 1897, Freud was spending six days a week analyzing his patients, many of them suffering from hysteria. Increasingly, their problems resonated with his own. Freud began to suspect that he too was neurotic, suffering from what he described as "a little case hysteria." He became consumed by his own self-analysis.

In the spring of 1897, Freud wrote his friend Fliess about a new patient, a young woman with hysterical symptoms: "It turned out that her supposedly otherwise noble and respectable father regularly took her to bed when she was eight to twelve years old and misused her…"

It was Freud wrote, "fresh confirmation" that the prime cause of hysteria was the sexual abuse of an innocent child by an adult, most often, a father. But his theory had alarming implications. If he himself suffered from a form of hysteria, and if an abusive father caused hysteria, then Freud was forced to draw a distressing conclusion. He began to imagine that his own father might have abused him. Three months after Jacob's death, he wrote Fliess: "Unfortunately, my own father was one of these perverts, and is responsible for the hysteria of my brother… and those of several younger sisters."

Freud realized that he can not get further in understanding others unless he analyzes himself. That was another one of those great ideas. [But] The dreams that he analyzed are not really particularly well analyzed.

Freud interpreted the message "close the eyes" in his dream after his father's death to mean that there was something he was not meant to see, nor to know about, his father. To make his theory work, his father's secret had to be that he had sexually abused his children. But, when he could find no evidence of such behavior and no clear memory of abuse among his brothers and sisters, his seduction theory collapsed.

By the next year, he began doubting his proposition, and wrote to Fliess: "I don't believe in my neurotica [neurosis theory] any more." Even if he mentioned the seduction theory in other letters of this year (and also years after), he began, then, to treat these denounces of his patients as a fantasy.

#vavuskapakage #sigmund freud #freud #historical figures #historical #History of psychology #oedipus complex #oedipus #psychoanalysis #Psychological projection #psychology #Seduction theory

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myhockeyworld87 · 3 years

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Ruined - Jamie Benn - Part 2

Word Count: 5,716

POV: Jamie

Warnings: Language, Smut, NSFW, talks about losing virginity

Notes: Here is the next part right away. Hope you guys enjoy this. Happy Reading!!!

Ruined Masterlist

Throwing on some shorts and a t-shirt, you headed down to the kitchen to whip up a quick protein shake before Tyler got there for your morning workout. With the season just around the corner, you’d pushed training into high gear, Tyler coming to your place every morning before you’d head off and workout with your trainer. In just a few short weeks training camp would be in full swing and you wanted to be in your best shape to make a run for the cup. But the Stanley Cup wasn’t on your mind as you turned the blender on, the grinding sound echoing through the empty house. Empty was the keyword there. You were tired of being alone, tired of going out to the clubs, ending the night with some mindless hookup. Maybe it was the fact that Jordie had finally popped the question to his long-time girlfriend Jess and the two seemed blissfully happy, that was making you want to settle down, or maybe it was seeing your sister with her little girl and longing for a family of your own. Whatever it was, you wished that you could just meet the perfect woman and fall madly in love.

The problem was you were too picky. They were either too tall or too blonde or maybe it was not blonde enough, then there were the ones that didn’t talk or were too chatty. You seemed to find something wrong with each and every woman you dated. Hell, your longest relationship only lasted six months and you’d only kept her around that long for appearance sake. You wanted a meaningful relationship with the girl of your dreams. It didn’t seem like much to ask for.

“Hey, I see you're getting new neighbors.” Tyler’s voice brought you out of your musings and you glanced at him as he walked into your kitchen. “Well not neighbors exactly, since it’s like two houses up, but the woman who’s moving in is hot as hell.”

“Do you mean in Doc Lundin’s place?” Dr. Lundin had been the team doctor for the Stars for the last several years and had finally decided to retire. You’d heard his practice had been looking at a young and upcoming doctor to take his place but didn’t know that they’d hired anyone.

“Yep,” Tyler finally answered. “Must be the new doctor’s hot wife. It’s a shame she’s married because, DAMN!” He gave a low whistle of approval. “I’m telling you, I’d be all over that.”

“Don’t you have a girlfriend?”

“We’re in an open relationship.” All you could do was roll your eyes, for all Tyler’s relationships were open, at least on his end. “But hey, if you wanted a crack at her, I’d give you first dibs, since it’s been a while.”

“Gee thanks,” your sarcasm was not lost on your best friend.

“I’m just saying it’s been a bit since you’ve gone out with anyone.” This you already knew and were just contemplating moments ago. “Maybe we should go for a run while she’s still out directing the movers.”

“Why don’t we leave the new doc’s wife in peace at least for a day or so.”

“You’re no fun.” Tyler downed half your drink but luckily, you’d made enough for another glass, before you headed out to your pool house that had now been turned into a gym. The two of you spent the morning and afternoon training before Tyler headed back to his house.

It was just after dinner when you decided to go for a run, now that the sun was setting and the Dallas heat wouldn’t make your shoes melt to the pavement. You thought you’d head up to see Jordie and Jess, who only lived about six blocks away. It would be a short little run, but still, a way to get some exercise in. As you stepped out of your house, it was still a bit steamy, so you tossed your shirt off, and flipped your cap backward before heading up the street. The moving truck seemed to be gone, so you guess whoever it was that captured Tyler’s attention was busy inside unpacking. You were so absorbed in checking out the house you didn’t realize that someone was coming around the corner at you until your bodies collided. Your hands immediately went to her hips to steady her. “I’m so sorry. I wasn’t watching…” you started to say while she was apologizing to you at the same time. It wasn’t until you looked at her face that recognition hit, then all words died on the tip of your tongue. “(Y/N), is that you?” She didn’t need to answer for you to know that it was her. This was your (Y/N), the first girl you ever kissed, the first girl you ever slept with, and the only girl you ever loved. Though you’d ruined all that. Standing there, you took in all of her features and you were reminded of how much you’d loved her back then. How much that first and only time with her had meant to you.

You’d been so nervous driving all the way to Vancouver with (Y/N), but she was more nervous. So, you took her hand and held it the whole way, occasionally dropping kisses here and there. The foot that wasn’t driving, bounced uncontrollably up and down with anticipation of the night to come. You were pretty sure you were wearing a hole in the flooring of the car. It had to be the longest car ride you’d ever had. “Did you maybe want to get something to eat before we head to the house?” You asked (Y/N) hoping to break some of the silence that was filled only by the stereo in the car.

“Yeah, we could do that.” She glanced over at you and gave you a weak smile.

“(Y/N), we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.” You totally meant the words you’d just spoken, for you in no way wanted her to feel pressured about having sex with you. This should be something you both wanted.

“No, I want to. Don’t you?” Her voice picked up a little bit, the sound more reassuring than the smile she gave only moments ago.

“I want to, too.” God, you sounded like an idiot. “I went to the pharmacy and got protection, so you don’t have to worry.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to.” This time it was your turn to look over at her, trying to see if you misunderstood her statement before scanning the road again. “I’m on the pill, have been for a while.” She said by way of explanation. “My mom thought it would be best, once she found out I was actually dating someone, but we can use the condoms too if you want.”

“I mean…uh…” were you really having a conversation about birth control methods? You supposed it was the adult thing to do. “If you think we should, we can.”

(Y/N) turned in the seat to fully look at you then. “Ok, so this will probably sound stupid.” Your head bobbed back and forth between the road and the girl you were in love with.

“(Y/N), nothing you say is stupid. You’re the smartest person I know.”

She leaned over and kissed your cheek. “Thanks,” she took a deep breath. “Anyhow, I kind of don’t want to use a condom if we don’t have to, at least this time.” You weren’t quite following her thinking so you remained silent for her to explain. “Like, it’s both our first times, so there’s not a chance of us getting a sexually transmitted disease or anything. We just really have to worry about getting pregnant. Which since I’m on the pill, and before you say anything, I take it the same time every day, so no worries there. I think we’re safe on that account.” You nodded your agreement, for it was just like (Y/N) to be so precise about something. “But the real reason I don’t want you to use it is…” she hesitated, almost as if she was embarrassed to tell you why. She certainly had to know that there was nothing to be ashamed of, especially with what the two of you were about to do.

“Just tell me (Y/N). I promise I won’t laugh or make fun of you or anything.” You squeezed her hand giving her a little added courage.

“I just want to feel you.” Her face started to turn a combination of pink and red, which looked totally adorable on her. “You know nothing in between us. I just really want to know what it feels like.” Fuck, you wanted that too.

“Yeah, that does sound nice.” You tried to downplay it though inside you were a jumble of nerves now, and thinking about what it would feel like to be inside her only made those magnify. What if you spent the moment your cock dipped inside her pussy? What if she didn’t cum? There were so many thoughts whirling around in your head, that you were ready to explode, and in more ways than one.

“So, then you agree? No condom.” (Y/N) asked you, drawing you back to the present.

“Yeah, no condom.” The car grew silent again and you could feel your hand sweating as it held (Y/N)’s. There was only about another half-hour left in the drive. “So, where were you thinking to get something to eat.” You changed the subject hoping to take both of your minds off what would happen later. You stopped off at a little burger joint that (Y/N)’s family always went to when they were in town. You couldn’t stop grinning at each other all through the meal. It was really quite ridiculous.

Afterward, you headed over to the house. You carried both your bags in. “Umm…where should I put these?”

“Oh, I don’t really have a bedroom here. I just sleep in one of the guest rooms, so we can just use one of them. They’re upstairs.” You followed her up the stairs, as she led the way to the bedroom. Inside was a massive four-poster king-size bed that had curtains draping down from it. Both of you just sort of stared at it for a full minute, letting the weight of what was about to happen sink in. “You can just put our stuff over there.” She pointed to the window that had two chairs sitting by it.

It was late in the afternoon and you weren’t really sure if you should wait until dark to do this or start now. Everything felt too planned out, except for the exact timing. “Did you want to…” you trailed off, unable to put your thoughts into words.

“Oh…umm…yeah,” (Y/N) answered and you took a step closer to her. Your hands went to her waist, as you pulled her closer to you, before dipping your head down to kiss her lips. It was awkward, just like it had been the first time you kissed, but then your tongue slipped inside her mouth and you felt her melt into you. She pulled back though suddenly. “Oh, I almost forgot.” She stepped over to her bag, rifling around inside. “I brought these.” She pulled out a couple of glass candles. “I thought…well I don’t know what I thought, but you know, they always have them lit in the movies.”

You smiled over at her, taking a couple of them and setting them on the nightstand and dresser. “Do you have something to light them with?”

“Oh, one sec.” She took off downstairs and you could hear her rummaging around the empty house. You gazed at the bed. Should you turn the covers down? Maybe take some of the pillows off? You were contemplating what to do when (Y/N) came back in. “I found a couple more, and this.” She held out a pack of matches and you took them, lighting the candles that she’d placed throughout the room. She pulled the blinds down on the windows and it cast the room in a romantic glow, which reminded you of the item you brought to add to the romance.

You pulled your mp3 player out of your bag and found the love song list you’d created for tonight and turned it on. You prayed that (Y/N) wouldn’t think that it was cheesy. When you finally turned around, she had the most adorable smile on her face. As you took the couple steps to close the distance between the two of you, she took a step back, and suddenly all those nerves from the car ride were back. “There’s just one more thing.” This time she grabbed her bag and headed into the bathroom.

While she was in there, you shucked off your shoes, then decided to get rid of your socks as well, since it would just be awkward to have them on. Grabbing the small bottle of Listerine, you had packed, you swished it around in your mouth then looked around for someplace to spit it out. There wasn’t any, so you just swallowed the small amount, coughing as you did. Lastly, you threw off the sweatshirt you had on. The fewer clothes you had to take off the better was your thought. You were tugging down the plain black t-shirt you had on, when (Y/N) stepped back into the bedroom, clad in a short silk robe. Your mouth went dry. Thoughts of what was underneath or what wasn’t filled your brain, both the one in your head and down below. Fuck, you needed to think of something else or this was going to end before it even started. You tamped down the lust that was threatening to boil over and walked towards (Y/N). “You look,” you shook your head trying to come up with the right word but there was only one. “Beautiful.”

“Thanks,” she mumbled back as a blush stained her cheeks. “I’m nervous.”

“Me too,” you admitted and you wiped your palms off before reaching for her. They slid around her waist then up her back as you looked her in the eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” she breathed out knowing that you were asking if she still wanted to have sex. You kissed her then like you had so many times in the past. Her arms slid up around your neck and you deepened the kiss. When you heard her moan, you let your hands roam to the belt of her robe, which came easily undone. Your hands roamed up her sides where you felt her lace bra. You were dying to know what she looked like in it. All the times that you and (Y/N) had done anything sexual together, she’d never been completely naked nor had you. It was always something hurried in the back of your car or on the couch when no one was home. Now though, you could drink your fill of her as you were alone with nothing and no one to interrupt you.

Gently, you pulled back from the kiss so you could gaze at her. Her body was covered in white lace, and you wondered if she had done it on purpose; sort of a nod to giving her virginity away to you. Unconsciously, you licked your lips as you took in the swell of her breasts and the curve of her hips. She was sheer perfection. “Damn,” you hissed out. “How did I get so lucky?” She giggled at your comment then let the robe slide off her shoulders; the view now even better than a second ago and you were finding it hard to breathe.

You felt yourself get hard just standing there staring at her. “Jame,” she said breaking you out of the spell.

“Yeah…uh…sorry.” You blinked hard, then took her hand and led her over to the bed, where you kissed her again. Slowly, you leaned her back onto the mattress, as your body hovered over hers. This part was nothing new, you’d made out with (Y/N) hundreds of times. It was what came next you were unsure of. Her hands slid under your shirt, and she bunched it up so that you could climb out of it. It fell to the ground somewhere in the bedroom. She then reached for the button on your jeans, but you knew if she took them off now, you’d be done. So, you rolled her to her side and followed her, unclasping her bra the minute her back was free. Your legs tangled with hers and you felt her hips gently rock into your thigh. She wanted this just as much as you did but you needed to make it good.

Last night, you’d pulled Jordie aside and told him of your plans, purely so you could ask his advice. He’d chirped you, of course, for not having done the deed with (Y/N) sooner. But when you threatened to just leave, he stopped. He gave you a ton of information, go down on her first to help her relax, make sure she was wet before you even tried to stick your dick in her, go slow because it will probably hurt her, and the last bit was, make sure you didn’t bust your load too soon. The last part was the one you were truly worried about.

(Y/N)’s bra now forgotten, you focused your attention there as you twisted both of your bodies so that she was now lying flat on her back. Kissing your way down her neck, you first took one nipple and then the other into your mouth. She moaned and it went straight to your groin. Thank god you still had your jeans on or you’d had spent right then and there. There were times you’d spend a good hour, just toying with breast but tonight was not going to be one of them. Working your way down her stomach, you kissed her right above where her panties were. The cute little white lace panties barely covered her pussy, and your mouth salivated just thinking about tasting her. You hooked your fingers around the elastic at the side, then started to shimmy them over her hips. (Y/N) rose up to help you rid herself of the flimsy garment.

Setting back on your heels, you drank in the sight of her bare body. You’d never seen her totally naked before, so you took a moment to just drink in the sight of her. One leg slightly bent, her arms off to the sides, but fidgeting as you gazed at her. “Jamie?” Her voice wobbled slightly and you could tell you were making her somewhat nervous, yet you couldn’t take your eyes off her.

“Sorry,” you said a blush coming to your cheeks. “You’re just…perfect.” She smiled, then sat up, grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you in for a kiss that had you wanting more. “Lie back,” you told her after kissing her breathless. She did and you took your hands and glided them from her ankles to her inner thighs; spreading her legs wide, so you could settle in between what you knew was your own little piece of heaven on earth. You grinned up at her before laying your tongue flat against her sweet little pussy, then licking between her folds. Her hips bucked forward even at the first contact. Your smile growing wider knowing that you were turning her on. You couldn’t help looking up at her as you flicked your tongue back and forth over her clit. Her hands fisted into the sheets and she moaned out something that you couldn’t quite hear.

Spreading her pussy lips with your fingers, you dipped your tongue inside her. “Jamie,” she cried out, and then you felt her hands threading through your hair urging you to continue. She tasted so sweet as you licked up and down her slit then flicked her clit. When she was wet and wanting more, you slid a finger inside her, mimicking what you wanted to do with your cock. Just the thought of being able to slide it into her warm and wet pussy had your cock hardening to granite. Fuck, you needed to get her off, so that you could feel her wrap around your dick before you lost your load. You made that come-hither motion, finding that spongy little spot up inside her. “Oh God,” she moaned out and you felt her legs start to tremble, as your hands kept them from clamping down on your head. Your tongue worked tirelessly on her little nub, alternating between flicking and sucking on it, as you fingered her. “I’m gonna…cum.” (Y/N) barely got the last word out and you felt her pussy spasm around your finger while her whole body bucked upwards. You felt a rush of wetness hit your lips and as much as you wanted to lick up every bit of her essence; you didn’t.

She slowly came back to reality with you, as you moved back up the length of her body until your lips were locked with hers. This time when her hands went to your waist you didn’t stop her as she undid first the button then the zipper. (Y/N) tried to help you shimmy out of your jeans but it was no use, so you rolled off her and wiggled out of them yourself. Her giggle went straight to your groin. “We have time, Jame.” You knew she was right but this was a moment you’d been waiting for, for a while now. You tossed the jeans and then your boxer briefs to the floor, before rolling on your side to face (Y/N).

“I know…it’s just…” you couldn’t quite put it into words, but she nodded her understanding, bringing her hand to your cheek and slowly kissing you. Your hand roamed up her bare back, pressing her close against your skin. She felt so soft and supple in your hands, and you rolled her onto her back, your body looming over hers as your lips and tongues molded together. She moaned into your mouth, and you broke the kiss looking down at her. There was a questioning look in her eyes at your actions. “Are you sure you want to do this? You can tell me no right now and we’ll stop.” It would kill you, but all (Y/N) had to do was say the word.

“I want this Jamie. I want you.” She cupped your face and brought it down to mere inches above hers. “I love you.”

Your lips spread into the widest smile that ever graced your face and it had nothing to do with her saying yes to sex. “I love you too, (Y/N),” you told her and although they were only five words, they were the truest thing you’d ever spoken in your life. This wasn’t some fleeting crush that a sixteen-year-old boy had on a girl. This was true love in every sense of the word. You’d known your feelings for her the first time you’d met, now they were just intensified and what would happen next would bind you two together.

Her legs fell open, letting you work your way between them. Taking your cock in your hand, you slid it in between her damp pussy lips. She gasped, breaking the kiss and allowing you to stare into her eyes. “Let me know if I’m hurting you,” you hissed out as you nudged forward just an inch. Her walls surrounded your cock and it felt like heaven. Jordie was right, you just wanted to push all the way into her and shoot your load, but you couldn’t or wouldn’t do that to (Y/N). This had to be good for her too. She bit her lip, which made you wonder if she was in pain or if it felt as wonderful for her as it did for you. Another inch forward and you felt a barrier in your way. You knew enough about the female anatomy to know what it was and that going forward would change everything, not only for (Y/N) but you too. You leaned down and gave her another kiss, hoping to ease some of the tension that you could feel coursing through her body. When you felt her relax a bit into the kiss, you pressed all the way forward burying yourself deep inside her. (Y/N) froze and you pulled your head back to look at her, as all the blood in your body went directly to your penis. It took every ounce of your being, not to move. Sweat beading across your forehead as you asked, “Are you ok?” You couldn’t tell if she was breathing or not. She had to be, right?

Finally, she inhaled deeply and it was as if you were taking a breath with her as the two of you were finally joined as one. “I think so…I...just need a second.” God, you weren’t sure you could last that long. Her breathing started to even out, as yours became irregular trying to keep your body in check. “I think…” she wiggled and you hissed in a breath. “Yeah…I’m ok…maybe if you…” she didn’t finish what she was saying as your hips moved of their own accord, just a thrust in and out.

“Fuck.” You were cursing more at yourself for moving than anything else, but damn if she didn’t feel good.

“It’s ok,” (Y/N) moaned out, her arms reaching around to your back urging you on. “Keep doing that.” Those words were like music to your ears and you found yourself surging forward back into the warm cavernous heat of her pussy, then pulling back out.

“God you feel so…” Good, just didn’t seem like the right word, but at the same time, your brain wasn’t exactly looking for another one. Your cock started to twitch, your balls getting that familiar tightening. You couldn’t cum, not yet, you’d only been inside her for a few minutes. You wanted this to last longer; wanted her to cum too, but there was no more fighting it. “I think I’m…”

“Yes, Jame, cum inside me.” That’s all it took and you thrust one last time before shooting your load in her as she reached up and kissed your neck. Stars clouded your vision, as your climax hit you. A strangled groan leaving your lips. You’d never came that hard in your life, as you collapsed on top of her.

It took a second for you to basically regain consciousness. “Shit, I’m sorry. I’m probably crushing you.”

(Y/N) laughed. “Actually, I kind of like it.” Your laughter joined hers until you started to wonder if it was appropriate for sex. You could feel your cock softening inside her, so slid it out of her as you rolled to your side. She whimpered slightly.

“Fuck, baby, did I hurt you?”

“No, I mean…it was a little uncomfortable at first but…then it felt so good.” She was on her side now gazing at you.

You brushed a stray lock of hair off her face. “Sorry, I couldn’t last longer, so you could…well you know.” It still felt awkward talking about getting off, even after what the two of you had just done.

“Don’t be. It felt good, Jame…really good….and maybe,” she ducked her head down into your chest, suddenly shy and mumbled something incoherent.

“Babe,” you said, lifting her chin with your thumb and index finger. “I can’t hear what you said.”

There was the cutest blush on her cheeks. “I just thought…maybe we could do it again. Like later tonight and well maybe tomorrow before we leave.” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing, her words were like a dream come true. Damn right, you wanted to do it again; as many times as she’d let you.

“Yeah, baby. I definitely want that.” Your lips connected with her, and after what the two of you had just shared, (Y/N) not only stole your heart, but your soul. That night you made love to her again, only then you made sure she came with you, just like you did in the morning before you left. Those twenty-four hours would forever be embedded in your brain and your heart, and as you dropped her off at her friend's house, so she could maintain her cover you knew that you would love only (Y/N) for the rest of your life.

Now, here she was fourteen long years later back in your arms. You shook yourself making sure that you weren’t dreaming. She still looked the same, only better; all hips and curves and things that made men lay awake dreaming about at night. As you took in her features, it struck you then. All those other women the ones you’d found something wrong with all the time; didn’t have anything wrong at all. It was just, they weren’t (Y/N). They were only filling a void from the time that you’d ruined everything until now. She was the woman that everyone else had to measure up to, only now she was someone else’s. Fuck, the thought made your head spin. Had it truly taken fourteen years to get her back only to lose her?

“Hello, Jamie,” she finally spoke and her voice washed over you taking you back to that day and the way she’d called out your name when you were inside her. Your cock hardened instantaneously. She was pressed close to your body and you wondered if she could feel it.

“It’s so good to see you.” They were the first words out of your mouth that made sense but they were also the most truthful. It was just too bad that the look on her face didn’t reflect the same. “Sorry, I’m just in shock seeing you is all.”

“No, I get it.” She replied. “Do you live around here?”

“Uh…Yeah, I’m the white house right there.”

“Oh,” she seemed to be taken back by this knowledge, which was probably understandable. Especially given the fact that her husband was going to be your new team doctor. Nothing like having your ex be your new neighbor.

“What about you? What are you doing in Dallas?” Though you knew the answer, you needed to hear the words come out of her mouth as confirmation, for until you did; you held out that small hope that there was a chance to make things right again.

“Um…well.” It was then that she stepped out of your embrace. You hadn’t realized how naturally she fit back in your hands and that of their own accord they didn’t seem to want to let go. “I just moved here.”

“Kind of got that with the moving truck and all,” you replied, your hand going to the back of your neck at your awkward comment, though she did smile at your words.

“Yeah, I suppose that did give it away.” She shifted her weight from one foot to another. It was a nervous habit of hers that you remember from back in the day.

“It was hard to miss, but I knew the old owner quite well since he was our team doctor. In fact, I heard our new doc was moving in. I guess I’ll be seeing you and your husband around more.” There you’d finally said it. It was like ripping a bandaid off. Sure, it hurt and all but once it was off the sting started to fade, only this time it didn’t, as a look of confusion crossed her face.

“Husband?”

“Oh sorry, my bad. I just assumed you were married. Fiancé then?” Either way, it was going to be awkward as hell seeing her at games and functions, let alone out in their yard. Maybe you’d need to look for a different place. Tyler had just moved recently, you’d have to get the name of his realtor.

A look crossed her face, and you remembered seeing it once before. It was when you’d tried to talk to her after the whole gossip fiasco. She was angry and you had no clue what you said to make her that way, but this was not how you wanted the conversation to go. “I’m not married or engaged, for that matter.” So it must be a boyfriend then, though that didn’t explain her displeasure with you at the moment.

“Geez, (Y/N), I’m really sorry. I just assumed that for you to move all the way here you’d be engaged or married to the guy.”

“There is no guy Jamie. I’m the new doctor.” A look of shock crossed over your face. Why hadn’t anyone told you she’d gone to study medicine? The obvious answer being you tended not to ask about her when you were back home, only because it hurt too much to think about her being with someone else. Though she wasn’t with someone else, it was just her, and she was now your team doctor, who you’d see almost every day. “I can’t believe that you’d think the only reason I’d move her was for a guy. Incredible! You haven’t changed one bit have you?”

“It wasn’t…I didn’t…” She started walking away, just like before when you’d tried to explain what had actually happened. “I just assumed…”

“Yeah, Jame, you just assumed! That what, I couldn’t be smart enough to earn the MD after my name, or that I’m still only good enough for a quick roll in the hay.” You went to answer but she held up her hand and took a deep breath. “Save it, Jamie. I’m a professional and that’s what I’ll be when I see you at the arena or out, but other than that…we have nothing to say.” With that, she left you standing there speechless as she jogged back up her driveway and into the house. And here you thought you had a second chance, that things weren’t totally ruined between you two. Maybe they weren’t. If anything, her position on the team, meant that you’d be seeing a lot of each other, something you were definitely ok with. You might have messed up all those years ago, and somewhat today, but now you had a chance to turn everything around. Maybe things weren’t quite ruined….yet.

#ruined the series #jamie benn #jamie benn smut #jamie benn imagine #jamie benn imagines #jamie benn fanfic #dallas stars #dallas stars fanfic #dallas stars smut #dallas stars imagine #dallas stars imagines #nhl smut #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #nhl fanfic #hockey smut #hockey imagine #hockey imagines #Hockey Fanfiction

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dearingbooks · 3 years

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The Difference one Woman can make.

Late Friday night in June, we had stopped for a burger on the way to the cinema, we used to do family movie nights at the cinema when a new film came out that the majority of us wanted to watch, this time I was the one who was reluctant to go, sadly we do this significantly less now. So, stubborn 2015 me, rolling her eyes and dragging her feet up the cinema steps to find our seats to watch the new Jurassic World movie. Pathetic! I thought, why pay money to watch a movie about a dinosaur theme park! My parents had completely lost it! Huffing and puffing I took my seat on the aisle and sipped my blue raspberry slushie and looked up at the big screen. Ugh! I wanted it to be over, quickly. I sat down and shut my mouth, despite not wanting to watch it, I wasn’t going to spoil it for the others; but I didn’t get why they would want to watch it, I watched the trailer before going, was not impressed, it looked dumb!

However, as much as my pre-Jurassic self would not like, I found who I was during that movie, I discovered a whole new admiration for actors and movies. I found that I related to the main female protagonist, Claire Dearing. She did not need a man, or children, she was so focused on her career and let no one boss her around. She was top dog, and I completely fell for this fictional character. I evolved through that movie with her character, I felt content with being a strong female who put career over family. I wanted to embody this fictional woman; I wanted to be her.

On the journey home I typed ‘Claire Dearing actress’ into google and saw this stunning redhead- Bryce Dallas Howard. I immediately recognised her from movies I had watched prior, and I was completely astounded at her range of characters she can portray and portray them well. After scrolling through her Wiki page and reading news articles about her, I learned that she is the daughter of Ron Howard, one of my parents’ favourite people in film.

“Dad, that woman in the movie is Ron Howard's daughter”, I needed to inform my family that my now favourite woman in film is the daughter of my parents’ favourite people in film. My parents were shocked that I enjoyed the movie despite my loud vocalisation of not wanting to watch it.

Googling ‘Bryce Dallas Howard’ became my new after school routine, learning that she applied to acting school as Bryce Dallas to avoid people knowing she is the daughter of an already famous actor and director, and she had met her true love at nineteen and is still happily married to him. Yet what most stuck out to the self-conscious, body hating 2015 me, was that Bryce wasn’t a skinny twig of a woman that you see in most movies, she had classy curves and promoted body positivity despite some backlash the media gave her. I made a connection with this woman I had never met because I too received negative comments about my figure, yet Bryce took that on the shoulder and learned to love herself. I wanted to feel that self-love about myself that she acquired.

After watching Jurassic World, I explored many more fandoms, and from there I became obsessed with movie franchises and TV shows, actors and directors. I could not give you a full list of all of the fandoms I am in, there are too many to count, and they have all played a role in helping me evolve to who I am today. All because I latched onto one character from one movie I did not even want to watch, one film got me hooked on this life: it’s like a drug. I cannot stop. I also went back and forth with my hairstyle due to this woman; in the movie Bryce has a stunning ginger graduated bob with a fringe, however I never had the guts to go ginger until now; shame the hairdressers are all shut.

Now, almost six years later Bryce Dallas Howard has had great success in directing two episodes of The Mandalorian. Over the Christmas break I watched the show with my dad, sat on the sofa, fire lit, the chocolate Labrador curled up between us, peach vodka and diet lemonade in my hand, hot cup of tea in my dad’s. We binge watched both seasons in a week (it’s amazing) and he was shocked to see ‘Directed by Bryce Dallas Howard’ at the end of one, let alone two episodes. “Shit, she’s come far in the past few years” he said putting another episode on.

Bryce allowed me to find my best friend, Iz, through Instagram; Bryce has brought so many people together it is so surreal. And when I found out that Iz was going to Southampton University in 2019, a 20-minute drive from my house, I was finally able to meet her, because of one woman we both adore. I was friends with Iz for three years before I was able to meet her, I asked my school friend to come along with me so she could film the moment Iz, and I met! We got pancakes and watched the second Maleficent movie at the cinema, it was one of the best days of my life. I was so thankful that I met a truly hilarious and loving girl through this one actress! Because of Bryce Dallas Howard, I have made so many other friends from all over the globe as they too idolise Bryce and together we have created the ‘BDH online family’. A small group of us do regular zoom calls to catch up and chat about the recent photos and updates that Bryce has posted on Instagram, talk about Covid-19 and the types of restrictions and lockdown rules each of our countries has. During one of our calls, we had the craziest idea- Invite Bryce to one of our zoom calls. Bryce said yes! And after a few months of organisation, we had the date. The date was-

My.

Birthday.

The day came around and I was so nervous, it was 11pm exactly. The Wi-Fi had cut out fifteen minutes before the call. I was in tears. Mascara down my face, puffy eyes, I joined the call with a few minutes to spare before Bryce joined it. My mum hung around off camera for the first 5 minutes to double check the Wi-Fi was stable, luckily it stabilised. The other girls had never been so glad to see me, everyone was panicked for me; I could not miss it for the world (despite telling my parents, in floods of tears, that I cannot join and that it’s the end of that).

“Kat! You’re here!” “Happy birthday!” “Are you okay? The Wi-Fi sorted?”

They all chimed, happy to see my little face in the bottom right corner of their computer screens. Luckily Iz was there, otherwise it would have been extremely awkward with only one of us since we are known as a duo in the online family, we have to do everything together, we come in a pair and there can’t just be one of us.

“Shit girls, that was stressful”

I hadn’t realised I was holding my breath until I exhaled the large breath when my Wi-Fi settled, and I was on the call, I fixed my makeup and was ready to meet Bryce.

The few minutes we had before Bryce joined were intense, two of the girls left to get a drink and we weren’t sure if they would be back in time, luckily they did return.

“No way!” One of them, Anna who was hosting the call, gasped “Bryce is in the waiting room!”

We all freak for no more than 10 seconds, we compose ourselves then our faces are reshuffled, and we see this stunning glowing face that we all admire smiling at us. Omg, it's her.

“Hi girls!”

I have never smiled for so long in my entire life, my cheeks hurt afterwards. Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining at all, it just hurt as I thought I would only be smiling for half an hour, since that is how long we were told Bryce had. However, we were speaking to Bryce for nearly an hour and a half, she just kept talking and asked us questions! She was so lovely to talk to, so relaxed; it was if I was talking to a friend that I had known for years!

“Before we go I want to all sing Kat a happy birthday!”

My idol wanted to sing me a happy birthday! The other girls were really ecstatic for me, I still can’t believe to this day that The Bryce Dallas Howard wanted to sing to me!

It was both the best and the worst happy birthday song that has be sung to me. It was the best because, well my idol was singing to me! And proposed the singing! It was the worst in terms of the actual song as they were all out of sync and lagging, it was bloody hilarious!

At 10:27pm the next evening, watching a rerun of Game of Thrones on Sky, I got a notification ‘Brycedhoward just posted’, I clicked the notification then see our smiling faces on her page, she posted a screenshot of our call on her social media! The call was supposed to be a secret so other fans weren’t upset. There’s a few snotty comments on the post, but they’re just jealous and to be frank, I don’t care! My smiley face is on her page forever! All ten of us have printed the screenshot of Bryce’s post off and put it in a frame, one day all ten of us hope to congregate somewhere, most likely in America, and sign the backs of all of our photos. I’m still in utter awe and shock- How many celebrities have you seen that would do a free zoom call with some fans? Not a lot, and that amount is even slimmer when they talk for an extra hour than scheduled. Bryce truly is one of a kind and the best idol anyone could ever hope to have.

Compared to a zoom call with Bryce herself, the few times she has liked my comments on her posts feel like nothing in comparison! I remember being so excited, running downstairs to my parents.

“Mum! Dad! Bryce liked my comment! She knows I exist!”

“Was it actually her? Remember when you got a Facebook request from Robert Downey Jr and it turned out it was a fake account?”

I rolled my eyes at her, it was Bryce, it was her verified account. The comment was a book recommendation I had for her, she posted on her hashtag BDHbookshelf and I thought I’d take a chance and comment a book recommendation I had for her, and the chance paid off.

I cannot wait to see what the future holds with Bryce, she has been such an inspiration to me for the past few years, and she promotes such wonderful causes and body positivity! I hope to one day meet her and thank her in person for changing my life for the better, and I think I’ve come up with the perfect opportunity to meet her- Iz and I have decided to travel up to London for the Jurassic World Dominion premiere in 2022 (if Covid lets us!), we’d get a hotel and actually meet Bryce in person, as well as meeting other members of the online family!

Words cannot fully contain the admiration that I possess for Bryce, her soul is utterly and truly exquisite, she has been such a visionary while I’ve been transitioning from a girl who had no idea who she was with no dreams or aspirations, to a woman who has now found so many new friends and now knows who she wants to be.

#bryce dallas howard #claire dearing #jurassic park #jurassic world #jurassic #blog #owen grady #chris pratt #marvel #Claire Dearing fanfic #bdh #bdh online family #writing #celeb #Jurassic fanfic #june 2015 #film review #favourite films

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