#i really considered dropping out of a class at the beginning of the semester bc i learned there would be a presentation as the final | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ljandersen · 4 years

Text

Heart to Heart

Pairing: FemShep/Kaidan Alenko, ME-3 Word Count: 2300 Summary: Kaidan shares how his father looped him into joining the Alliance.

____________________________

Shepard gazed up at Kaidan. He stroked her hair idly, his eyes fixed on the observation window. She was starting to feel sleepy again. Her heart beat slow and hard to the rhythmic brush of his fingertips on her temple. With her head on Kaidan’s lap and the stars glittering before them, it couldn’t get more peaceful on a military vessel. But time was ticking down. Each breath was one less separating Now from the End. There was so much more she wanted to do with him. To know. She was wasting time dozing and not finding out. Shepard sat up abruptly.

“You all right?” he asked.

“What did you want to be when you grew up?”

“What?”

“We ever end up on a couples’ game show, I need to know the basics.” Shepard twisted to face him and folded her legs on the bench. “Don’t hold out on me. What did you want to be?”

“What did you want to be?”

“Make me go first, huh?” Shepard pulled his hand into her lap. “ Fine. What did I want to be when I grew up? Well, not a farmer. Not a biologist or ecosystem engineer.” Shepard ran her thumb nail along the side of Kaidan’s finger. “I didn’t know what I wanted to be. I only knew I wanted to be in charge.”

Kaidan’s smile stretched. “Had your calling young.”

“Ha, yeah, I guess.” Shepard considered the idea. “When I think about it, I could have gone a lot of different ways. Could have ended up commanding a ship of pirates or smugglers, being in charge of a team of Terminus System mercs. Who knows? But instead, fate put me on the straight and narrow.”

“Fate? Or you realized the good you could do by joining the Alliance?”

“You know something,” Shepard said. “When I saw the Alliance fight on Mindoir, I wanted to fight alongside them. I knew right then. I had this feeling, I should be a part of it. I thought it was so I could make the bastards pay who did things like that. But I was wrong. It wasn’t about that. It was so I could be the one who got there sooner than help came for me. It was about helping the helpless, not killing the worthless. I wanted my family back. Wanted what happened to them to mean something bigger by my actions going forward. But it wasn’t dealing death like I thought, it was saving life. That gave meaning to it. Gave me meaning.”

Kaidan touched her cheek. “Shepard, your family would be amazed what you’ve done. You’ve made them proud a hundred times over.”

Shepard’s lips tickled with the beginning of a smile. She kissed her palm.

“What about you?” she said. “Your dad was military. This is what you always wanted to do?”

“After what happened at Brain Camp? No.” Kaidan’s fingertips traced down her jaw. He covered their hands with his palm again. “I always liked tech. I majored in engineering at the university in Vancouver. I think I’ve told you that.”

“Engineer Alenko?” Shepard cocked her head with a soft smile. “You wanted to map power grids and design Omni-Tools?”

“Something a little more exotic maybe. Off world. There were companies that contracted all over space, colonies or urban worlds. Variety of tech systems, challenging, a lot of movement and chance to see things. Opportunities to be on the edge of the unknown connecting comm systems and terra forming energy platforms.”

“Not a bad gig.”

“I didn’t think so. The right company, I could be working with interspecies engineers, learning with new technologies, applying outside ideas. See the galaxy, the cultures, the worlds.”

“Then what happened?”

“Well …” Kaidan drew his hands away and fidgeted with the boot propped on his knee. “After Jump Zero and everything that happened, you can probably guess. I didn’t know what to do with that part of myself. I wanted to be normal. I enrolled in the engineering program at VU. As students failed and dropped out of the program, the ones of us who pulled through became close. By the third year, we left the engineering dorms. We roomed together in a large house on the edge of campus. We studied together, went out together. I even stayed with some of their families.”

Kaidan rolled the boot lace between his fingertips. Shepard shifted on the bench and waited.

“And?” she prompted softly.

Kaidan hesitated but met her eyes. “The summer after our third year, there was an applied internship program. Prestigious, competitive. Teams submitted grant applications and project binders. GPA, extracurriculars, interviews. Our team was one of the teams selected. There were ten of us working on the project proposal. We all moved to Boston for the summer and first part of the fourth semester.”

“Something went wrong with your project?”

“No.” Kaidan chewed the corner of his lip then sighed. “Four months into the internship in Boston, I was at the lab. We all were. We were starting to get into the software application, running tests, joking around. I can’t even remember. Men showed up for me.”

“Men?”

Kaidan leaned an elbow on the back of the bench and touched his forehead. “I forgot to register. Forgot to inform the Bureau I changed residences, left the BC area. The Biotic Registration Bureau had tracked me down. They showed up at the lab since they didn’t know where I was staying.”

“They made a scene?” Shepard ventured.

“They were polite enough, I guess.” Kaidan eyed her for a moment, then sat up straight. He cleared his throat. “You see, I had never told anyone. Told anyone I was a biotic. Maybe they could have recognized it if they knew anything about biotics, but you know how it was, it was new. I’d never met another biotic myself outside of Brain Camp. It was rare, unknown, stigmatized. I just wanted to be normal. I felt like it shouldn’t matter. I didn’t use my biotics. I had good control, never flared. It was like they didn’t exist, at least, from the outside. Maybe I was in denial or caught up in being what I wanted to be instead of what I was, but either way, the result was the same. The Biotics Registration Bureau showed up for me. My friends, my best friends I’d done everything with for three years, they were shocked.”

Shepard reached over and gripped his forearm. “They turned their back on you? Because you were a biotic?”

“They turned their backs on me, but not because I was a biotic. What they might have thought of me being a biotic, I’ll never know. I never gave them a chance to find out. They rejected me, not because I was a biotic, but because for three years I never told them.”

“You weren’t lying.”

“Yeah, but I wasn’t telling the truth either. We finished the project. After the internship, I finished the fourth year by myself. I saw them in class, but there wasn’t any going back.”

“You dropped out?”

“No,” Kaidan said sharply. “Of course not. I finished my degree.”

“But your plans to join a galactic tech company?”

“That last semester changed a lot of things. My dad …” Kaidan grinned at the floor. “My dad never quite gave up on the military angle. More than his own experience, I think he knew what I couldn’t accept: that it was a place where my being different wasn’t a liability but an asset. Where this part of myself I wanted to leave behind could actually be used for something good instead of just alienating me, scaring or hurting people. I think he knew it was the best path for me to accept myself, even be proud of it. I could belong somewhere, find meaning, help people, see the galaxy. Really, in a lot of ways, the perfect fit.”

“Your dad brought it up to you again?”

“He’d never stopped, but that last semester he knew I was struggling. I think he knew all his talk about the Alliance only made me dig my heels deeper. I had said ‘no’ so long, it was almost on principal then.” Kaidan laughed and rubbed his forehead. “There was a chink in my armor now though. I’d lost everything I thought I’d made since Jump Zero. I felt lost again.

“My dad had a spur-of-the-moment errand with an Alliance chum one morning. He’d picked me up from campus, a holiday or something. I was already strapped in when he told me. I swear he waited for the click of the seatbelt, then it was, ‘Oh, I just remembered. Told Chisholm I’d drop by with his book while he’s in town training the incoming officers.’ We could both see through the story. He knew I knew, but we just pretended. I turned on my Omni-Tool and said, ‘Whatever. Just roll a window down for me and don’t take forever.’”

Shepard chuckled and flicked his shoulder. “Your stubborn streak is well worn, I see.”

“Went pretty deep.” Kaidan laughed. “But, uh, I think I come by it naturally. My dad must have known what I’d say. He said he had to return a book, but when we got to the academy, all of a sudden it was books. Not two books or three books, boxes of books. Five or six boxes stacked to the top. I remember just standing there with the hatch up and muttering, ‘What the hell?’ I even started digging down and reading titles to make sure it wasn’t filler. I expected to see my mom’s old harlequins or something else off the shelf from home, but it was all military-related. He couldn’t haul in six boxes of books by himself, so I helped him. Conveniently, we took a very winding and slow path to Chisholm’s classroom. Dad kept pointing out different areas. I kept saying, ‘Are we going in circles? I’ve seen that plant before.’”

“And when you reached your dad’s friend?”

“What do you know, he’s in the middle of an applied skills class for sentinels. Up to that moment, I didn’t even know sentinels existed, a fusion of tech and biotics. I stood against the wall, sighed, and looked around a lot. I shifted the boxes in my arms and checked the time. But I didn’t forget what I saw. Dad was ready with all sorts of scripted ‘off-the-cuff’ questions for Chisholm about his teaching, the officer’s academy, sentinels, biotics. Dad introduced us.”

Shepard beamed at him. “Got over your stubbornness?”

“Yeah, I mean, I took my time about it. Couldn’t fold right away. I looked into it, networked, met with some other biotic officers. I swore Captain Chisholm to secrecy. He agreed not to tell my dad, but let me audit a week of his classes. Later, do you know what Chisholm told me?”

“What?”

“He said that morning, the morning I was picked up, my dad showed up to borrow Chisholm’s books. He took the whole bookcase worth. Even had a student haul it to the skycar with him. That was 0900. Then he picked me up at 0930. We brought them straight back. After I found that out, I didn’t feel nearly as bad taking my time. When I had my paperwork in order, just needed to push the button, I went home for the weekend to tell him.”

“Your dad was probably thrilled.”

Kaidan grinned. “I set down my bag, and Mom gave me a big hug. When she stepped back, she asked if I’d heard back from the recruiter, then she slapped a hand over her mouth. Turns out, Dad knew what I was doing the whole time. I would have been mad, but I could see what it meant to him. I was so fixated on avoiding an ‘I told you so’ and making clear it was my own decision, I never thought about it just making him proud. He broke out the expensive whiskey from the top shelf. Then we sat on the balcony, drank, and talked a long time.

“A lot of things changed from that point out for me. One of those things was with my dad. Up to then, I was a kid. An adult, but a kid in a lot of ways. After I joined, things were different. He was still my dad, of course. I looked up to him, respected what he had to say, but we were friends too. More equal footing. I went from fighting him and trying to prove myself, to appreciating his advice. I wanted his advice. He could see what was better for me sometimes than I could see for myself. Everything with the Alliance proved that.”

Air thickened in Shepard’s throat. “I’m sorry he’s MIA, Kaidan.”

“I’m sorry about your family, too, Shepard.”

She fell forward and wrapped her arms around his neck. He brushed the hair back from her face and kissed her lips. She crawled over him. He pulled back from the kiss with a tense laugh and looked over at the door.

“It’s almost morning, you know,” he said.

“Come upstairs with me.” Shepard tugged him to his feet. “You said you’re exactly where you want to be, right?”

“With you.”

“I’m exactly where I want to be too.” She grabbed his face with both hands. “With you. I don’t want your family ever reading those letters, but I’m glad you’re with me. I need someone making me eggs. You’re my best friend, Kaidan. More than a best friend. More than anyone’s ever been to me.”

Kaidan’s breath sharpened. “You’re that for me too. Always.”

“Always.” Shepard pecked his lips.

They burst out of the lounge and shot to the elevator.

From “About Mars:” AO3 and FFN

#Mass Effect #Fanfiction #shepard x kaidan #fShenko #Shenko #Kaidan Alenko #femshep #About Mars

51 notes · View notes

dreamsafterhours · 4 years

Text

college boyfriend!markhyuk au series: I (mark’s pathway)

a universe in which roommates!markhyuk meet each other's s/o in class

markhyuk are roommates, my/n and dy/n are roommates, mark and dy/n take classes together and so do donghyuk and my/n — how will their fates intertwine?

genre: fluff pairing: platonic!donghyuk+my/n format: dotpoint AU universe: non idol, college best friend warnings: n/a

please read the prologue before reading!

masterlist

or click here to meet your new best friend, eng lit!mark :))

0 ⇤ | I | ⇥ II

I: the fateful meetings

the beginning of the companionship between donghyuk + my/n

donghyuk is kinda late

on the first day

to the first lecture

of the first semester you get it

anyways, in case you didn’t notice, he’s late

not rlllllly late it just seemed like it bc the prof started a couple minutes earlier than scheduled and he walked in alone afterwards

and besides, he isn’t the last person into the lecture theatre anyways

so he walked into the lecture theatre cursing the architect who designed the room so that the entrances were at the front at either end of the stage so everyone could see who walked in and out

luckily, since it was the first day, the prof excuses him bc he was likely a first year who got lost

but he’s technically a second year who only just decided on a major so here he is, taking a first year biology subject

so by the time he walks in, the only available seat closest to the entrance he walked in from is next to yours fate wills it so

so he sits there with a small smile at you but didn’t really bother you afterwards until

the prof’s reading out the syllabus and key dates and even tho you’ve already got it all outlined in your prewritten notes off the subject handbook, you listen intently to make sure you didn’t miss anything

the boy next to you starts rummaging around his bag and stops, then lets out a disbelieving exhale under his breath

you notice and look over at him

he makes eye contact and laughs a little harder, making you smile

“did you forget something?”

“i’ve forgotten my laptop in my dorm...” he tells you in a whisper, screwing his eyes shut and tilting his head back in disbelief

you have to stifle a laugh “oh no... do you have a class right after this?”

he shakes his head no, “i have an hour free, thank god.. i’ll run back and get it later”

you turn back to the professor, but you find it against your conscience to just leave it at that

"do you... want me to send my notes over to your email?”

“ah, that’s fine. this lecture should only be about the syllabus anyway, i can find that online. thanks, tho” he adds, nodding and shooting you a grin

since the prof started a tad earlier than scheduled, they finished early and gave some time for you to “introduce yourselves to the person next to you”

so you turn to him because the girl next to you had already become acquainted with the person on her other side

“i’m donghyuk. second year here, but i just chose my major, so i’m taking first year classes this year.”

you nod, “my/n, i’m first year. yeah.”

“cool. i thought so,” he nods back

“was it the first year subject that gave it away?”

“nah, it was the fact that you had prewritten notes of the syllabus but actually listened to the prof”

you laugh, “touché”

a short silence you lowkey hate silence but most of the time you rely on the other person to keep the conversation going unless you’re super close and you have a lot to talk about

“so what major did you choose?”

“med, to get into paediatrics”

you light up, “ooh! i’m thinking of med too”

“really?? nice, any field you’re thinking of?”

“i’m considering midwifery or nursing, actually”

he naturally offers a fist bump and you’re glad it’s not awkward

“eyy! let’s save the children! you deliver them, i’ll treat them. maybe we’ll have children ourselves and you teach me how to deliver” he grins jokingly

you laugh and decide he’s easy enough to talk to bc you lowkey didn’t realise he meant your own children like between you two

“no, but seriously, this is like one of those cheesy movies, we could be partners in med and then partners wed”

a short pause as you process

“nah i’m kidding lol.. unless” stop flirting with the wrong girl donghyuk

he giggles at your reaction and you realise he’s actually joking so you decide to join in

“oh my god we’re moving too fast donghyuk” to which he laughs out loud

by the end of the lecture, you realise that maybe he’s like this with everyone he meets and in the next lecture, he’ll sit somewhere else and befriend other people like this so you decide not to make any promises to sit next to each other but

“do you have insta?”

“oh—yeah, give me a sec”

you fish your phone out of your bag and let him type in his user

“thanks for offering to send me the notes, by the way, i owe you one”

you shake your hands in front of you “oh, that’s fine, don’t worry about it”

“nah, let me know if you need something”

so you consider

“actually.. you said you had a free hour after this right”

“yeah”

“can you show me where this building is.. i still can’t find it and i’ve got that class next”

“oh yeah sure”

so he walks you to the building and on the way, you pass his dorm (he insists he’ll get his laptop after he drops you off since you don’t have time to wait) so when he points it out, you say that your dorm is just across from his

“oh, you live on campus?”

“yeah! i really like my roommate”

“that’s good. my roommate’s old” sry mark

“how old?”

“third year”

“that’s not old!”

“he’s already groaning about a sore back when he gets out of bed tell me he’s not getting old”

anyways he drops you to the building and tells you to text him if you don’t know where a building is

then you arrive at your dorm after your last class, your roommate comes in and tells you about this third year she met in her first year class and you tell her about the new friend you made, laughing about how he highkey flirted with you on the first meeting

you find that he’s accepted your follow request and liked your one post

if you were told that you would be best friends in a couple of weeks

you.. could honestly believe that , because of how well your humour code matched his and how he was good at leading conversations and seeing the fact that you were comfortable enough to make your own semi flirtatious remarks back, you were going to become very close very fast

but oh well ,, let’s see how this plays out

click here to meet eng lit!mark :))

0 ⇤ | I | ⇥ II

#dreamwritersnet #neohours #neowriters #nct au #nct 127 au #nct dream au #markhyuck #markhyuck au #markhyuck x reader #mark x reader #haechan x reader #donghyuck x reader #nct college #nct college au #eng lit mark #paediatrics haechan

5 notes · View notes

drashleighreid · 4 years

Text

ugh i know i’ve made this post before but i’m honestly just in awe of how much and how quickly my studies/perception of my own abilities turned around last semester. like i’ve struggled so much with impostor syndrome and not feeling like i’m good enough or feeling less than. i’ve struggled a lot with my sense of self, especially through having adhd, i was the typical case of doing really well in high school and having rly inflated ambition etc and then going to university and crashing and burning (multiple times) i tried studying like 3 or 4 different things and ending up hating it/dropping out after a semester until i finally started studying film when i was 23. it kind of felt like a last hope for me like i even remember when i did my big 6 month backpacking trip before i moved to melb i was in toronto hanging out with my friend who was trying to convince me to get a work visa and move there and work with him and i told him i was thinking id go back to aus and start studying again but that id consider it and i remember he made like a flippant remark about me trying study again like it wasnt intended to be rude but just that he knew that id hated uni every time id gone lkjlkjsf and even when i started the course i knew that like it was kinda my last hope of getting a degree which had always been a big goal of mine, i felt shit about myself a lot of my best friends from high school had already graduated at this point and i just felt hopeless - and studying something creative after feeling for so long like it wouldnt yield a stable future was a bit of a ‘fuck you i’m done’ kinda move on my part too lol but even through the first year and a half (and even a smidge beyond that) i was battling back and forth whether to drop out and i cried about it to my therapist numerous times because i didnt feel good enough and that it was hopeless etc and that everyone else was better than me, more focused than me. i couldnt even sit through films without being on my phone bc my adhd wouldnt let me so how the f was i gonna work in the industry lmao ! it was so challenging bc i legit didnt know what id do if i dropped out !!! but i just kinda kept going no matter how miserable i was and how much i was sobbing in week 13 writing my essay or how much i felt like everyone in the course were making friends with each other but i had no one or how scared i was to share my ideas with people !!!! i literally felt so bad in every way !!!

but like through small building affirmations things just keep getting better !!! last semester i pitched a concept for a 16mm short film and it was one of the 4 ideas chosen out of like 25 to be made and i had the most rewarding experience directing the project and made amazing connections with people and created something actually amazing ??? the teachers had almost no negative feedback for it and i got the best grade i’ve ever received lol and i made some rly good friends and got a lot of positive reinforcement from the actors and people saying that i struck a rly good balance with directing and that i was amazing to work with !!! but even after that experience going into 3rd year and beginning major projects i had reservations and felt really nervous because i didnt feel prepared and i was worried that people wouldnt like my idea or after only having written/directed for all of my projects so far i felt like i had to Perform again. the the impostor syndrome - though a lot more muted than before bc i have positive experiences to lean back on!! - was kinda there again like this idea that everything i’ve accomplished so far has been a fluke and that people are gonna realise im dumb etc. etc. lmao but like ! ive pitched an idea and people i dont even know from the course have reached out saying they love it and want to work on it with me and i have basically a full crew ?? just need someone on sound?? and we havent even had the class where we have discussions about it and talk more in depth, thats solely based on a less than 2 minute video pitch and ive had so much interest !!! and it just feels so nice !! like i know this isnt the end, we still have to get greenlit by the panel before it will move ahead to production but its just so validating to have people behind you who show interest and passion toward ur ideas !!

and ive been chatting to other people about ideas and their film concepts/chatting about helping out with other roles on other films for ppl bc u can do that and id love more hands on experience on sets so im trying to get into sound design and production design bc like no ones gonna hire a film student grad as a director kljlkjsf you gotta be a worm !

but like basically this is a really long winded way of saying that i cant believe people actually really value my ideas and my vision and feedback. i got this message from one of the most intelligent people i’ve ever met and like... just two bros being in awe of each other... cleansing

honestly like !! if you read this far wig go off !! i havent done one of these long winded feelings dumps in a long time but its like good and positive feelings moving forward, even in social iso i feel so connected and wonderful. peace n blessings love u all. chase ur dreams and dont give up !! @ past me and at all of u out there !! its gonna be ok keep going u got this bitch !!!

#p #read more #long post

5 notes · View notes

snarkystjames · 4 years

Text

Listen To Your Heart || St. Berry

Date: December 13th. Late afternoon

Location: McKinley High School & Rachel’s house

Starring: Rachel Berry @starberrycupcake & Jesse St. James

Notes: Jesse shows up at McKinley after hearing Rachel is banned from seeing her boyfriend. He offers to help her study.

Warnings: partial song fic bc it’s glee (gross)

Rachel Berry:

Rachel had begun the year determined and not distracted by anything and now here she was, almost the end of the first semester of her senior year completely consumed with something other than the future. It had felt so good to be so focused on Hunter and absolutely nothing else but now that she was grounded until her grades were up, she was frustrated with herself. She didn’t regret being with Hunter in the least bit. She’d had the best, most wild three months of her entire life and she wasn’t about to regret any of it because of school. She would just have to pull herself together and quickly get her grades up and she and Hunter would be off to starting their future in no time.

Her teachers were seemingly exasperated with her constant requests for extra credit and make-up work so she could hopefully pull her grade up before her GPA dropped significantly. Though reluctant, they still gave her a much needed chance and she knew that if she could just get it all done she would be set and she could see Hunter on her birthday without having to sneak around. It had only been a couple of days but knowing she couldn’t see Hunter made her want to see him even more.

Rachel was just finishing up glee club when she sent a text to her boyfriend, letting him know she was finally out of class and was thinking of him when she bumped into a familiar face right outside the door, almost knocking her phone out of her hand. “Oh! Jesse!” She glanced around to make sure her glee peers were nowhere to be found. “If any of the New Directions see you, they’re going to flip out on me.” She let her eyes trail up to his face, her demeanor softening a bit. “What’re you doing here, anyway?”

Jesse St. James:

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m here to see you, of course,” Jesse replied with his usual confident demeanor. He had been waiting right outside and as soon as he’d seen Rachel come out of the room, he was right in front of her. He didn’t care whether or not any of the other New Directions’ kids would’ve spotted him. “I’m not here to spy but you were amazing in that last number-- someone might want to tell Finn that he was a little pitchy on the last refrain because he probably doesn’t even realize.”

Jesse smoothed out the front of his jacket, playing with the ends of his chiffon scarf for just a moment before smiling at Rachel. “Vocal Adrenaline is taking a break from rehearsals today-- a rarity-- so I thought it'd be the perfect opportunity to see you. Is your boyfriend going to mind if I'm here to see you?"

Rachel Berry:

Rachel felt a little apprehensive about seeing Jesse at all much less alone, especially considering the smile that involuntary spread across her face at the way he told her he was there for her. Their history was complicated and Jesse had a great track record of making her feel on top of the world and then ripping the rug out from under her. For some reason, however, she trusted him each time. Even now despite her apprehension she could feel the trust.

Rachel chuckled, shaking her head. “Finn was fine, he’ll be ready by competition. We did win Sectionals after all.” A cheeky grin spread across her face as she looked at her former lover but it quickly faded when he mentioned Hunter. She felt mildly uncomfortable in that moment, thinking she should maybe tell Hunter about this little run in. “I’m sure Hunter wouldn’t be thrilled to know you’re here, especially considering that I’m grounded and not even allowed to see him.”

Nibbling on her bottom lip, Rachel glances around again before sighing. He had come all this way to see her. “I can’t really hang out too long because my dads will be home in a couple of hours and I’m supposed to be home when they get there…” she offered, letting him know that if he wanted, she could make the time for him.

Jesse St. James:

“Congratulations on the Sectionals win, by the way. It’ll be fun to see you and your boyfriend go head-to-head at Regionals; I’m sure we’ll be seeing you at Nationals again this year,” Jesse grinned. Upon hearing that she and Hunter were banned from seeing each other due to her being grounded, an idea popped into his head. Any time an opportunity presented itself to Jesse, he was raring to grasp it at first chance.

“So let’s go to your house,” Jesse suggested, completely unbothered with the fact that he just invited himself over to Rachel’s house. “I’m sure your dads will be supportive of you getting homework help from me; I did go to college, after all.” Of course he intentionally left out the fact that he’d dropped out because he didn’t actually go to his classes. But that wasn’t a necessary detail right now.

Rachel Berry:

“Thank you,” Rachel grinned. “It will be a lot of fun because he’s as competitive as I am. That is if the Warblers even let him stay long enough.” She rolled her eyes, sighing as she thought of all the drama that Hunter had been through so far this year. “Of course I’ll be at Nationals. I have to win, it’s crucial to my reputation-- if I can start out in the Broadway scene as a national show choir champion it’ll be extremely helpful in getting the respect that I deserve.”

Rachel raised her eyebrows at how forward Jesse was, though it shouldn’t have come as such a shock. “Jes, what makes you think I can have anyone over if I can’t have my boyfriend over?” She asked him, nodding her head towards the way she would begin to walk. “Wait, you want to help me with my homework?” She giggled. “Do you even know anything about Trigonometry?” Rachel couldn’t remember the last time - if there was ever a time - that Jesse even talked about homework or anything that wasn’t related to show choir or Broadway. “I have some make-up homework- I actually could use help on it.” She said as she approached her locker, opening it up to grab the homework she needed to take home. “I had thought about sneaking out to Westerville but I don’t really have a way to get there and back before LeRoy and Hiram get home so..” She shrugged.

Jesse St. James:

As Rachel walked towards her locker, Jesse accompanied her and met her pace. “Yeah, I’m great at math,” he boasted, though he honestly couldn’t say what he knew what trigonometry even looked like. “It’s just like, adding and subtracting stuff, right? How hard could it be?” At the mention of her going off to Westerville, Jesse nibbled on the inside of his cheek. He wanted to say something about how that was a bad idea and Hunter was causing her to neglect her studies but he thought it wiser to keep his mouth shut.

“Oh, before I forget,” he spoke up as she rummaged through her locker for her things. He pulled out a slim jewelry gift box, held closed by a simple gold ribbon. “I brought you your birthday present in case we don’t see each other before then. I figured you could use the pick-me-up after being grounded, too.” He handed off the box, giving her an expectant look for her to open it now. He looked happy and hopeful as she opened it to reveal a necklace with a small gold star charm.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel shook her head as a giggle fell from her lips. She wasn’t sure if he was joking or not but she was among towards him being serious which was no help to her. Still, it would be nice to have the company for a little bit. She was about to speak again when Jesse interrupted her by pulling out the small jewelry box.

“What’s this?” A grin spread from ear to ear as she closed her locker and took the gift from him. When she opened it up to reveal the golden star, Rachel’s stomach flipped. “Oh, Jes…” her grin faltered a little bit as the weight of the gift settled in her. It was incredibly sweet and it made her heart skip a beat. “You shouldn’t have, I can’t accept this..” she tried weakly to deny his thoughtful gift. “It’s too much.” Her brown eyes looked up to meet his, her voice soft.

Jesse St. James:

“Stop it, it’s your birthday gift,” Jesse pushed, taking the gift box from her and stepping behind her. “A girl such as yourself should have the best accessories to accentuate your beauty and talent.” He helped to put it around her neck and once he was done, he returned to stand in front of her to get a good look. “See? It looks perfect.” You look perfect.

So it was probably pretty obvious to everyone that Jesse still had feelings for Rachel but that didn’t mean he couldn’t do nice things for her-- especially since the gift was for her birthday. With Hunter out of the way for the time being, he knew this was his chance to get back in Rachel’s good graces and establish himself as her close friend. “So? Are we going back to your place to study?”

Rachel Warbler:

Rachel bit down on her lip as Jesse moved to slip the necklace around her neck, placing her hand on the small gold star that now rested on the base of her neck. It was the sweetest gift anyone had ever given her. When he came back to get a look at her, a blush painted her cheeks at his words. Shaking her head gently, Rachel smiled at him. “Thanks, Jesse. I really love it.” She felt the warmth in her cheeks spreading down her neck, the effect he had on her was obvious and she was regrettably transparent.

When Jesse suggested going to her house, she let out a soft sigh, checking the time. “I suppose, but you have to leave at five. You can’t be there when my dads get home, I’m walking a fine line and I don’t want to not see Hunter until we graduate.” She explained as she gathered her things, closing up her locker for the day. Hunter. She again felt compelled to let Hunter know that Jesse had showed up. “And you have to help me with my homework to some extent- no distractions.” Rachel pulled out her phone as she led the way to leave the school, sending a text to Hunter to give him the heads up that Jesse showed up at McKinley and was giving her a ride home. “Can I get a ride home?” She asked Jesse, glancing over at him. “My dads dropped me off and I’m supposed to get a ride from Kurt but there’s no need for him to go out of his way since you’re here.” She smiled.

Jesse St. James:

Jesse grinned ear to ear when Rachel finally agreed to him coming over. Even if it was a few hours, he’d take what he could get. “Yeah, of course. My Range Rover is parked right over here,” he gestured in the direction of his car once they were outside. “I promise I won’t do anything to distract you but I also wouldn’t be opposed to singing with you if you wanted; it’s been a while since we’ve had a duet together. You know our voices sound phenomenal together.”

When they both got into the car, Jesse’s phone connected via bluetooth and he scrolled through his music, looking for the perfect song for such an occasion. He knew the Rachel Berry he loved-- who also loved him-- was in there somewhere… He just needed to coax her out. The opening melody of Roxette’s Listen To Your Heart started playing over the speakers as Jesse started driving out of the parking lot and towards Rachel’s home.

Rachel Berry:

A smile spread across Rachel’s face when Jesse suggested singing with her. It had been a bit since they’d had the pleasure of singing together and she would be lying to herself and everyone else if she said they didn’t fit together vocally. He was the only person that could ever keep up with her talent. That is, until she met Hunter. “I suppose a harmless duet wouldn’t hurt.” She said as she got into his car, settling in and buckling her seatbelt.

When she heard the first note of the song flow through the speakers, her stomach clenched and she glanced over at Jesse, a small grin tugging at her lips. She knew the song and she knew it well, obviously. His choice of song wasn’t lost on her and she knew that she shouldn’t lead him on-- but she also couldn’t resist a chance to belt out one of her most favorite classics. Shifting in her seat a little, she folded her hands in her lap, closing her eyes.

I know there's something in the wake of your smile I get a notion from the look in your eyes, yeah You've built a love but that love falls apart Your little piece of Heaven turns too dark

Jesse St. James:

Jesse had known that Rachel couldn’t resist this song. When she started singing in that crystal-clear voice that Jesse adored so much, he couldn’t help but to smile and nod his head. He kept his eyes on the road but glanced over to her whenever he had the chance. These days, it was rare for him to hear Rachel singing unless it was at a competition. Singing with her was an even rarer occurrence.

When the next verse started, he sang along with her. Just like the first time they sang Hello together in the music library those years ago, their voices melted together beautifully.

Listen to your heart

When he's calling for you

Listen to your heart

There's nothing else you can do

While stopped at a red light, Jesse looked over to her and when he caught her gaze, smiled brightly at them. Regardless if on a big stage, in the choir room, or doing a little karaoke in the car, Jesse always enjoyed singing with her.

Rachel Berry:

When Jesse’s voice melted with hers during the chorus, Rachel couldn’t stop the smile that appeared on her face, looking over to Jesse to catch his eye when they were stopped.

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile

The precious moments are all lost in the tide, yeah

They're swept away and nothing is what is seems

The feeling of belonging to your dreams

She kept her eyes on Jesse as she sang with him, giving it her all as usual. She could feel something crawling up from the depths of her heart, something that was supposed to be shoved deep down to never be touched again. It felt good to sing with Jesse but for a brief moment as she looked to the man next to her she saw Hunter- the mirage taking her breath for a split second. Rachel shook her head, she sang with other people all of the time, it didn’t mean anything because it was Jesse.

The only man who’d ever come close to knowing her as much as Hunter did.

Jesse St. James:

Jesse was in high spirits as they continued to harmonize through the song. He liked the way she looked at him when they sang to each other. After the song eventually came to an end, Jesse turned down the volume as the next track played.

“Still as amazing as always; it’s a wonder why you’re not already on the fast track to Broadway,” he said to her. They were just a few blocks away from her house by now. “It’s too bad you can’t pass all your classes by just singing… You’d be valedictorian.”

When they pulled up to the house, Jesse parked his car in the driveway. It’d been a little while since he’d been over to her house-- not since when they were still dating each other. It almost felt like stepping into a timewarp, into the past.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel blushed again for the second time that day when Jesse complimented her, giggling softly. “That’s really sweet.” She said, looking over at him as he parked. “What about you, though? You’re equally as talented as I am...if not more so. You shouldn’t be here in Ohio-- you should be in New York already.” She shook her head, her tone serious. “I know Vocal Adrenaline is important to you...but they’re holding you back.”

She knew from the times they’d spoken that Jesse wasn’t back solely for Vocal Adrenaline-- but for her. “You can’t let anything-- including me-- hold you back.” Nibbling on her bottom lip, she grinned a little, reaching over to place her hand on his. “You’re too good for this place, Jes.” Rachel gave his hand a gentle squeeze before moving to take off her seatbelt.

Jesse St. James:

Jesse was quiet for a moment after Rachel told him that he shouldn’t let anything hold him back. It was nice that someone believed in him-- that he was destined for bigger and better things than Ohio. He squeezed her hand back and smiled at her. “This is just a temporary gig-- another credit I can list on my growing résumé,” he insisted, knowing that he couldn’t be confined to such “small picture” ventures.

When they exited the vehicle, Jesse let Rachel lead the way up the path towards the front door. “But for the record, it isn’t you that’s holding me back,” Jesse clarified, pausing for a moment to clear his throat, “New York is still my future. You’re part of that future, too.”

Rachel Berry:

Rachel paused briefly with her keys in the door as Jesse reiterated that she would be part of that future. It was sort of flattering that Jesse was so adamant. She may be part of his future career-wise but romantically she just couldn’t do it. Anytime the thought tried to crawl out from the back of her mind all she could see was Hunter. “We will take over the Broadway scene,” she chuckled, opening the door to let them in. “Our names will be in everyone’s mouth.” She dreamed for a moment about her and Jesse being friends and being a powerful force in New York together.

“You and Hunter getting along is crucial, though, or it’ll never work.” Rachel cleared her throat as she led him into the dining room, placing her things on the table. She was suddenly very aware that she was alone with Jesse and it made her palms a little sweaty. “So, uh, trigonometry…”

Jesse St. James:

"Oh, definitely. The first time you have a leading role, you and I will win for Best Actress and Best Actor; we'll do so much press as the two ingenues from Podunk, Ohio who made names for themselves-- together." Jesse followed Rachel into her home, also acutely aware that with her parents not present it made them very much alone. He took the time to take a look around, familiarizing himself with how things looked similar to the last time he was here. Nostalgia washed over him, picturing his teenage self with a doe-eyed sixteen year old Rachel Berry singing duets together around the piano in the living room.

Jesse forced himself to step away from the past, aware that he needed to put himself in the present to continue being part of Rachel's life. "So what's Hunter's plans? College in New York? He probably wants to do something boring like being an accountant, right?"

Rachel Berry:

Rachel chuckled to herself as she took a seat at the table, noticing the way Jesse skirted around her prompt for the homework help that he’d come for. She should’ve known better-- Jesse couldn’t actually help her with her homework. He just wanted to spend time with her and if she were being honest, she did, too. She wanted to spend time with him without Hunter around so she could assess Jesse’s actual intentions and feelings and if he could actually handle just being her friend.

“I told you, we’re moving to New York. He’s wanting to go to Cornell- which, admittedly, isn’t ideal because it puts two more hours between us than we have now but it’s not like we can’t make it work. We’ll meet halfway most times, I’m sure.” She said, having not given much thought to their future other than the fact that they were going into it together, even if it meant being apart for a few more years. “His father wants him to go into the Navy, follow in his footsteps. But we haven’t talked about that much, though.” Nibbling on her lip, Rachel tried to push the thought from her mind as she usually did. She hoped that when the time came, Hunter would choose her over the Navy without prompt and she didn’t have to be that girl.

Jesse St. James:

“Navy?” Jesse murmured to himself, wondering how that would impact Rachel’s future. “So he’ll be on a boat somewhere? Like a sailor out to sea for weeks and weeks at a time..? Doesn’t sound like fun.” He finished perusing through the living room before returning to Rachel’s side at the dining room table. Her books were spread out on the table and when Rachel opened up the math book, his eyes became wide like saucers. He couldn’t make heads or tails of what he was looking at, but he wasn’t about to make that apparent.

“A sailor and a broadway superstar don’t really mix, do they? It’s not exactly the ‘Broadway power couple’ I envision when I see you walking down the red carpet at events.” Jesse flipped through the pages of the trigonometry book, eyes scanning the content to see if there was even a little bit of something he understood so he could help.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel sighed, looking down at the table as Jesse mentioned Hunter being away for long periods of time out in the middle of the ocean. She really hadn’t taken a moment to sit alone with those thoughts and really assess. She thought being grounded from Hunter was bad, but what about when he was shipped off somewhere and she couldn’t speak to him every single day whenever she pleased? She suddenly felt nauseous.

“M-maybe it’s not ideal. But it’s what he wants...he doesn’t hold me back from what I want.” She was trying to convince herself rather than Jesse. “If...if the Navy is what he wants to do then I can’t stop him.” Rachel trailed off, thinking of the first date she’d gone on with Hunter when they had discussed their lives. “Though...I don’t really think it’s what he wants really. I think his dad is more or less pressuring him into it.” As these thoughts began to nibble at her anxiety ridden brain, she wasn’t so much focused on getting to her homework. Glancing over at Jesse, Rachel shook her head. “Do you know anything about the Navy? Do they, like, go to actual war?” She realized then she had little to no knowledge of any military branch.

Jesse St. James:

Upon hearing that Rachel wasn’t especially supportive of Hunter’s decision to join the Navy, Jesse thought to himself that perhaps he found the fracture in their seemingly perfect relationship. It would be cruel to manipulate Rachel, but honesty was the best policy… Being upfront with her about his opinion of the military wasn’t the wrong thing to do, right? “Oh, I’m pretty sure people in the Navy go to war,” he answered, leaning back in his chair a little. “I mean, I only know from television but there’s a bunch of ships and submarines in the ocean watching the Koreans, right? It’s like, an island, right? So it’s surrounded by water. Isn’t the US. on the brink of a war with them right now?”

He backed off a little when he realized he might be scaring Rachel. “Maybe you can convince him not to join the military. The guy’s in show choir too, right? I mean, there’s no way he can get into NYADA but lots of actors hack it in New York without an education. He could totally get an ensemble role.”

Rachel Berry:

“War?” Rachel asked, looking at Jesse with her forehead wrinkled, the nausea turning her stomach again. “L-like, war?” She shook her head, imagining the worst case scenario. There was a vivid image in her mind of her in New York, alone. And then another of her coming backstage from curtain call of one of her shows to a phone call letting her know that Hunter was dead and never coming back. She took a shaky breath, closing her eyes and shaking her head as she tried to calm the anxiety that was rapidly building in her chest.

“Uh, yeah,” She cleared her through, pressing her lips together as she looked down. “He’s extremely talented. He’s better than me, even. Well...at least just as talented.” Rachel explained, rubbing her hands over her face, taking another breath. “I just don’t…” She tried to get the images out of her head again, sighing. “Maybe...maybe he won’t go. Maybe he’ll change his mind and realize that it’s not his dream and he’ll find something else. Y-yeah...maybe.” Rachel placed her hands down on the table, sitting up a little straighter, visibly uncomfortable, anxious. She didn’t want to think about this anymore, it was scaring her and she didn’t have Hunter there to comfort her and talk it through. She didn’t want to have an anxiety attack in front of Jesse, either, regardless of whether or not he’d seen it before.

Jesse St. James:

Jesse mentally kicked himself when he realized Rachel was on the verge of an anxiety attack, clearly caused by him. “If anyone can convince someone into doing something, it’s you. If he really likes performing as much as either of us you can convince him to do something else with his life. Besides, who goes to college just to waste it in the military? That’s just dumb…” Maybe he would talk to Hunter too; it was the least he could do after making Rachel unnecessarily worry. “I mean, weren’t you just talking about Ohio and Vocal Adrenaline holding me back? Don’t be surprised to run into me this time next year because I am definitely going to New York, too. Even if I have to bus tables while I go to every audition out there, I’m going.”

His tone about New York was much more self-assured than before and it was all thanks to Rachel’s words. She had an innate ability to cheer anyone on, right beside them. Even if Rachel wasn’t actually doing anything, she really was a driving force for Jesse to find his place. He just hoped that when he landed on his own two feet Rachel would be standing right beside him.

Rachel Berry:

Rachel just nodded her head as Jesse tried to talk her down from the looming anxiety attack. “I guess. I...I don’t even really want to think about it anymore.” She tried to get the jarring images to leave her mind as she took a deep breath, appreciating the way Jesse changed the subject.

“Y-yeah...I know you’ll be there. I don’t doubt that.” She looked over to Jesse, placing her hand on his. “That’s why it’s important to me that we all get along. We’re going to be in each other’s professional lives at the very least.” She said, giving him a gentle smile. “It’ll be really nice to have a familiar face to work with, I’m glad it’ll be you. I mean that.”

Jesse St. James:

Jesse nodded a bit when she agreed that they’d all be in New York together. At least while Hunter was in college figuring his future out, Jesse would be the third wheel; he had that much guaranteed for him and he was completely fine playing the slow game. Rachel had almost gone back to him once before, so it was only a matter of time. “Right? The three of us will be bonafide New Yorkers in no-time. Now c’mon, I promised to help you with your math homework so tell me what chapter you’re on and I’ll look up the answers on my phone.”

He was satisfied that he managed to talk her down a bit and she was smiling, so he took it as a good sign. Her worries were obviously still there because a matter like that wasn’t going to be overlooked; Jesse knew her too well to know that he’d inadvertently planted a seed of anxiety somewhere in Rachel’s brain. One thing was certain to him, however: if Hunter was going to commit to the military, things might not work out for him and Rachel. That was the golden opportunity Jesse had been waiting for.

#rachel berry rp #jesse st james rp #st berry rp #glee rp #1x1 rp #paras #para: rachel #rachel

2 notes · View notes

chasethesun18 · 4 years

Text

50 questions you’ve never been asked

tagged by @goddess-clarke 🥰

What is the colour of your hairbrush? purple and black

Name a food you never eat? seafood and red meat

Are you typically too warm or too cold? i used to be too cold all the time and then i went through a time where i was too hot and now im back to somewhere in the middle but mostly cold. my fingers turn blue a lot lolol

What were you doing 45 minutes ago? mm so i just watched the premier of blindspot s5 and it is now dead to me and i will be forgetting this episode happened and not continuing the season. so ive spent the last hour trying to erase the ep from my memory and cheer myself up. its not working so now im answering 50 questions. as one does.

What is your favourite candy bar? oh i don't know. it changes. i really like peanut m&ms and york patties

Have you ever been to a professional sports event? professional...maybe? i think i’ve possibly been to a pro baseball. im from the south and we dont do pro we only do college. ive been to..idk hundreds on hundreds of those

What is the last thing you said out loud? told my mom i loved her. cause im cute like that.

What is your favourite ice cream? i like vanilla with a lot of toppings. but also coffee and mint chocolate chip

What was the last thing you had to drink? im drinking cherry vanilla coke zero. yes its 11:42pm. dont judge me.

Do you like your wallet? yeah its cute. its little and red

What was the last thing you ate? salad with chicken (oo she healthy)

Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? yeah no. i haven't bought new clothes in forever. actually got into an argument with my mom about that today

The last sporting event you watched? BEFORE SPORTS WERE CANCELLED YOU MEAN????? baseball.

What is your favourite flavour of popcorn? ....popcorn has flavors? idk salt?

Who is the last person you sent a text message to? my sister. about said blindspot premier. she's writing a book and considering killing off one of the characters and i told her i didn't want someone to get to the end of her book and wish she hadn't read it which is how i feel about blindspot rn

Ever go camping? i do, my major is parks and rec so im a ~big outdoors girl~ but im actually more into the historical preservation side of things and i dont really like camping but i have been dragged into it bc of my major

Do you take vitamins? no but i take a shit ton of medication. y'all didnt need to know that srry.

Do you go to church every Sunday? yes. before that got cancelled too. its fine.

Do you have a tan? i do! super proud of it. its the beginning stages

Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? pizza i hate chinese food

Do you drink your soda with a straw? yes

What colour socks do you usually wear? white

Do you ever drive above the speed limit? ....ok does anyone follow the exact speed limit? come on. ive never gotten a ticket tho

What terrifies you? a lot of things. small spaces. bugs. heights but only sometimes. losing a loved one. change. im an anxious person ok

Look to your left, what do you see? a wall (these are entertaining answers im serving yall)

What chore do you hate? vacuuming. GOSH I HATE IT. idk why but it pisses me off every time. i think its cause it makes me sweat and like why should i have to SWEAT from vacuuming? its so loud too i can't listen to music while i do it

What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? g’day mate

What’s your favourite soda? coke zero or dr pepper

Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? drive-thru unless the drive-thru is too long and then it defeats the purpose of going for fast food so i go in

Who’s the last person you talked to? my mom

Favourite cut of beef? i dont eat red meat :P

Last song you listened to? holding on and letting go - ross copperman (tvd forever)

Last book you read? my major is reading heavy and my minor (history) is even more reading heavy. i had a history class this semester where i had to read 6 books in their entirety so that's the last thing i read. i havent read for fun since i started college lol. but i do still read fanfic and that counts

Favourite day of the week? friday. its the anticipation of the weekend without the disappointment of the weekend

Can you say the alphabet backwards? lol no

How do you like your coffee? if i make it myself i like it with creamer and splenda. if i get it out i like sugar free vanilla lattes with nonfat milk (yes im a basic bitch I KNOW. i also take a sip and if it tastes wrong i go ‘um excuse me is this the nOn FaT MiLk’ like im literally that bitch)

Favourite pair of shoes? aesthetically ive got some bomb heels but i havent had the occasion to wear those in a long time

The time you normally go to bed? before all this 11-1. now idk time is just a construct

The time you normally get up? ..before all this 8/9 depending on what time my class was. now i force myself to get up around 9/10. i dont naturally wake up. if i dont set an alarm i will sleep until 1pm

What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? i like both but i havent seen many sunrises bc i dont wake up. so sunset

How many blankets on your bed? twooo

Describe your kitchen plates: the ones at my parents house are just plain white and the ones in my apartment are plain green. wow im plain.

Do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? so ya girl just turned 21 !!!! and no, im not a big fan. it all tastes like cough syrup. help.

Do you play cards?. my family does sometimes. i think its boring

What colour is your car? dark grey. her name is the black pearl. shes not black tho....

Can you change a tire? no but ive never tried

Your favourite province? ok this question is gonna show my ignorant american side and i dont want it to soooo

Favourite job you’ve ever had? i used to work at this place that did mommy and me music classes. i taught the one that was a drop off class called school skills so it was like k5 for 3-4 yrs old

How did you get your biggest scar? i dont have many scars. i have one above my eye from falling backwards into a rocking chair lol

What did you do today that made someone else happy? i dont know, honestly. i feel like im barely interacting with people. i ran errands with my mom and i think that made her happy...but she was in a bad mood so hard to tell lolol

anyway, this was fun and now im not thinking about that show. crap now im thinking about it. UGH.

tagging: @hpfangirl13 @amazalina @dorisquinn @rebel-belles @vivianelynne20 @modernlifehistorian (i know you're there) @sherlolly-siya @fromiftowhen

#tag game

2 notes · View notes

sun-summoning · 5 years

Note

Hi! Sorry to bother you, but I was wondering what happened to the fic the grad fad? I loved it but I can't seem to find it on FF. Thank you! :)

you know what i read this and had a moment of “wtf is the grad fad” followed by “it sounds SO FAMILIAR” then i looked through stuff on my computer and found a doc with that title that was last updated in 2013 and thought “oh god that’s when i graduated university wtf was this fic about???” i assume i deleted it off ffn back in the day bc i knew i’d never finish it.

anyway here’s all that i found:

Note: This is my last year of university and I’m actually quite sad, so this is mostly for my lawlz. But I promise I will have a plot.Warning(s): AU, going by my own university’s calendar Pairings: SasuSaku, NaruInoDisclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

SEPTEMBERi need a place to live

“Can I live with you?”

Sakura needed a home.

She was luckier than most people with her parents living just an hour and a half’s commute away from Konoha University, but she would rather pay rent every month than go through the two trains and two buses and twenty minute walk she spent her entire freshman year dealing with. She spent her second and third years living with Tenten, but that recently-graduated, totally lame, Judas loser decided to take the Next Step in her Relationship and Move In with her boyfriend, hence Sakura’s problem.

Sakura was homeless. Sort of.

Karin only raised an eyebrow at her before eyeing her one-bedroom apartment. There was a solarium, yes, but those doors were see-through and offered no privacy. “Seriously?”

But Sakura would not be moved. She nodded eagerly. “Honestly, I’d be down for a closet. Please? Lend me that room?”

“Fine.”

And so that was that.

Except it wasn’t.

It worked well enough, Sakura supposed. At the beginning, that is, when Sakura was still enjoying the remaining bits of frosh week and the constant keggers going on. On the first week of class—when all that happened was syllabi-reading and maybe an introductory lab or two that Sakura didn’t need—there were Mojito Mondays and Because I Freaking Feel Like it Tuesdays to go along with the traditional Thirsty Thursdays. For the first week of class, Sakura mostly came home to her glass room at Karin’s home in a lovely state of drunk or delirious.

But then she started coming home sober.

Second week struck and so did its readings upon readings upon readings. Sakura scrambled from the KU Bookstore to the shop for cheaper used books a few blocks away from the university where all the hipsters lived. She would then go to the printing press on the other side of the city for that course pack, and then to another printing press on the other side of the city for another course pack. Then she would settle down in the library with a chai tea latte and lemon poppy seed muffin and shut off her phone and get her readings done.

(Not that anyone was texting her, of course. Ino was basically ignoring the world and Naruto still felt like it was move-in time and Sakura knew for a fact he had a keg at his house and Sasuke and her basically didn’t talk unless they were forced to.)

In her second week of September, Sakura would come home extremely late, with aching shoulders and arms full of books.

In her second week of September, all Sakura would want to come home to was a cozy bed and ugly bunny slippers and Netflix. Instead, she came home to Karin’s bra on the sneakers Sakura left by the door and the beautifully permanent sight of Karin and Shikamaru doing the deed on the couch.

Sakura just sighed. “Guys, like, I eat my breakfast on that couch!”

They barely noticed her before Karin let out a squeak and they casually moved their canoodling over to her bedroom.

“Seriously?!” Sakura yelled, dropping her book bag and mourning the sight of the beloved Lazy Boy, forever tainted by Shikamaru’s naked ass, cute as it may have been.

Sakura plopped down on the carpet, sitting right in front of the recliner.

This wasn’t going to work.

“Can I live with you?”

Sakura twitched when she got no response. Ino had been like this all summer. She was in I’m-taking-my-LSAT-therefore-nothing-exists-but-these-LSAT-notes mode and essentially drowning everyone and everything. There was no time for double fisting the red sangria and the white sangria at Red Room after a long day of class, nor was there time to listen to Sakura propose potential research paper topics. Ino had quit her job and her social life in favour of studying, studying, studying.

“Ino?”

Ino had a pretty swanky place, actually – for a studio apartment, that is. But it was surprisingly large for a kitchen-living-room-bedroom hybrid monster. It even had a balcony!

“Yo! Blondie!”

Finally, Ino looked up. “What was that, Sakura?”

Sakura pouted.

They were at the coffee shop near the Bio labs on the west end of campus. Ino had only agreed to Sakura’s invitation when Sakura offered to buy her sleepless friend some coffee. Apparently the implied “you’ll have to listen to me when I speak” part of that deal went unnoticed, however. Great.

“Can I live with you?” Sakura repeated.

Ino didn’t miss a beat. “No.”

“What?” Sakura couldn’t help it. Her jaw literally dropped. She was ready to prepare some grand speech about friendship and bonds and love and all that jazz that Naruto would have been super proud of, but Ino waved her hand – granted, she looked more like she was trying to swat away some irritating bug.

“Sakura,” she said flatly, “consider the size of my apartment.”

“It’s fun-sized,” Sakura reasoned. “Super fun-sized.”

“No.”

“But I’m homeless!”

“You live like an hour away—”

“AND A HALF.”

“—you’ll manage.”

“But I’m homeless!” Sakura repeated pathetically, hoping that if she pouted Ino might have been moved.

But that was not the case. Ino’s eyes were already back on her binder of notes for her LSAT studying. “Nope.”

“You’re a heartless, wretched beast,” Sakura said. She gathered her things and made sure to grab the caramel macchiato she spent a grand four dollars on for some traitor. She stuck her tongue out when Ino let out an indignant cry for having her coffee stolen. “Sorry, I don’t buy drinks for jerks!”

“Just commute, you lazy baby!”

“I CAN’T HEAR YOU.”

“Can I live with you?”

Naruto didn’t look even remotely surprised to see Sakura on his front porch with a bright pink gym bag full of her clothes and a backpack that looked ready to burst at the seams. And he didn’t even want to think about how heavy that other bag pulling at her left arm was, considering all the textbooks sticking out of it.

Like the good friend he was, Naruto grabbed the bag of books and the bag of clothes.

“Come on,” he said, moving to the side so she could enter the house.

“You’re the best, Naruto!”

“Yeah, yeah…”

Sakura had been to Naruto’s place many times. It was a house in the so-called “student ghetto” just off of campus with an open-concept main floor and a fair number of bedrooms. If Sakura remembered correctly, Naruto had the big room in the basement, Suigetsu called dibs on the attic, and Sasuke and Shikamaru had rooms on the second-level. But now that Neji had moved in with Tenten—

“Am I getting Neji’s old room?” Sakura asked.

Naruto nodded, guiding her up the stairs even though she already knew where to go. “Yeah, I figured you’d be here eventually.”

“What?” Sakura felt tears spring in her eyes. She couldn’t help it. She was tired and stressed and her shoulders were killing her. “You saved a room for me?” She was in awe of how sweet he was.

But Naruto just shrugged and looked away. Sakura saw the way his cheeks reddened though. “It’s not a big deal. We just didn’t bother looking for another guy. I had a feeling things wouldn’t work out at Karin’s when Shikamaru basically stopped coming home all of first week…”

Sakura still tackled him into a hug, forcing him to drop her bags. She pulled away and smiled. “You are literally the best, did you know that?”

He grinned back. “Obviously.” But a thought came to mind and his smile waned. “Um… there’s just one thing…”

“Yeah?” Sakura was too busy marvelling at the fact that her new room came with walls (and a bed and drawers and a closet and even a calendar) to notice his frown. “Don’t worry about rent. I got my job at the registrar’s office again so I’m good.”

“It’s not that.”

Sakura finally looked at him. “What is it?” She suddenly looked equally as frantic. “Oh.”

“Are you okay with living with your ex?”

“Obvously.”

“Really?”

“No.”

“I figured.”

“Meh.” Sakura shrugged. She took her bag from Naruto and opened it up to beginning the process of moving in all over again. “I’m kind of homeless, so I’ll make due. And you know how I am during school. I basically just live at campus during the year.”

Naruto laughed and ruffled her hair. “Don’t worry,” he told her, “we just have one more year of this crap, right?”

Sakura glanced at the calendar and nodded.

“Just one more year.”

OCTOBERi need reference letters

So it was October.

October came to mean a lot of things to Naruto: midterms, essays, Thanksgiving a.k.a. Turkey Day, pumpkin spice everything, breaking out the awesome orange scarf Sakura knitted for him years ago, pretty leaves, and so much more.

Now the boys didn’t usually maintain their house unless someone was coming to visit. Fine, the tiny front lawn would see a mowing every other week or so, and the backyard was only managed if there was going to be a party. And then the inside was divided that every man would take care of his own place, the kitchen would always be cleaned by whoever made whatever mess, and the bathroom would go through a weekly cycle of sorts. But things like the broom and the vacuum were only broken out for special occasions.

“Guys!”

In the living room, Sakura was sketching silly outfits on the bare bodies in her anatomy textbook in lieu of studying, while Naruto made his own efforts to procrastinate pretty obvious as he made a tower of all the novels and plays and poetry anthologies he had to read for the semester. So far, his stack was balancing at a rather noteworthy twenty-two. Shikamaru, on the other hand, was making paper balls with his notes and throwing them at Naruto’s tower.

They all looked up at Suigetsu’s frantic shout.

“What is it?” Sakura asked. She had the grace to look annoyed by the interruption to her ‘hard work.’

“Sasuke’s mom is here!”

Immediately, Naruto and Shikamaru rose, their eyes wide and their arms near flailing. Sakura raised an eyebrow when Naruto shrieked. His book tower had fallen over when he stood up so fast.

“Clean that up!” Suigetsu yelled, pointing.

Naruto anxiously did so by pushing all of the books under the couch. At the same time, Shikamaru was taking all the randomly strewn about mugs and plates and – oh god – beer bottles and hiding them in the video game drawer. Suigetsu was keeping a careful eye on the driveway from the window by the stairs.

Sakura could only frown. “What are you guys doing?”

“Sasuke’s mom is here,” Shikamaru pointed out.

Sakura looked at the boys like they were idiots and, for the most part, they returned the look. Suigetsu finally sighed. “Sakura, have you ever seen Sasuke’s mom?”

“Yes,” she said. “In fact, I—”

Naruto shushed her. “Sakura, haven’t you heard? Sasuke’s mom has got it going on!”

Sakura did not look amused, but that didn’t stop Naruto and the other boys from opening the door and yelling their hellos. They all ignored Sasuke’s knowing glare as they took his bags from him and all warmly greeted the lovely Mikoto Uchiha. They exchanged pleasantries and thanked Mikoto wholeheartedly when she graced them with a whole turkey for the house – her little Thanksgiving present to them.

“Oh, Mrs. Uchiha, you didn’t have to do that,” Suigetsu told her sweetly.

But the older woman just smiled and waved the matter off. “Oh, but you boys need to be properly fed!”

Sakura could only pray she had that kind of decency when she was older and sending her son off to live with his fellow cavemen. Sakura eyed Mikoto Uchiha’s beautiful cashmere sweater and her form fitting skirt and could actually kind of understand why her friends were all salivating like dogs. She suddenly felt incredibly insecure in her yoga pants and the sweater she ninety percent belonged to Shikamaru. God, she was such a mess, Sakura realized. At least she wasn’t wearing her UGGs…

Dammit.

“Sakura Haruno, is that you!”

Sakura blinked. “Huh?”

Finally, the boys got out of the way and Mikoto rushed over and hugged her. “Oh, darling!” Mikoto let go enough to look Sakura over and frown disapprovingly. “You’ve lost weight!” she pointed out gravely. “Why haven’t you been eating, missy? This better not be over some stupid boy, because let me tell you—”

Sakura flushed. “Nope!” she interrupted. “I just…” Sakura laughed awkwardly and took a step away from Mikoto. “I just, um, have been busy and haven’t really been sleeping properly…”

Mikoto immediately turned around to face the boys. “And why haven’t you all been making sure Sakura is eating correctly? Hm? Shikamaru? You’re the responsible one!”

Shikamaru froze for a moment with the attention on him. “Um.” He chuckled. “Well, I haven’t really been around either, Mrs. Uchiha. But I’ll definitely make sure our little Sakura eats three square meals a day.”

“Yes, you better!” Mikoto took her turkey out of Naruto’s hands and deposited it into Sakura’s despite the blond’s protests. She winked at Sakura. “Eat up, sweetie.”

Sakura smiled. “Thank you.”

Mikoto gave her son one last kiss on the cheek before saying her goodbyes to everyone. When she was finally gone, Naruto let out a low whistle and made some flattering but inappropriate comment that led to Sasuke punching him in the stomach and stomping away. Still wincing, Naruto hurriedly stole the turkey away from Sakura and brought it to the kitchen.

That was one last thing October meant to Naruto: Mikoto Uchiha sending over a whole turkey for their little house of broke students.

But the gesture of turkey-giving didn’t arouse the same happy feelings in Sakura. As Suigetsu thoughtfully took a bag of Sasuke’s on his way upstairs, Shikamaru volunteered to walk Mikoto to her car, and Naruto took the turkey for some “alone time,” Sakura went back to her anatomy textbook and suddenly felt incredibly lonely.

Sakura had spent Thanksgiving dinner with the Uchiha family once, back when she and Sasuke were still together. She got along with them all to the point that Mikoto would literally text Sakura at least every other day just to make sure she was okay or to talk. Ino thought that was weird, but Sakura justified things with that Ino had never been in a real relationship – not one that included bonding with your partner’s parent. And when Sasuke dumped Sakura, Mikoto immediately asked Sakura if she was okay. But Sakura soon began to distance herself from the woman, mostly out of propriety, and seeing her in person today made her feel horrible.

Sighing, Sakura picked up her mug of sangria and whined when she realized it was empty. She grudgingly went to the kitchen and took the bottle out of the fridge. After a moment of consideration, she decided to learn from past mistakes and drink from the bottle and skip the mug.

“Well done,” she told herself after a sip.

“Sakura, it’s ten in the morning.”

She joked and spun around. Sasuke was leaning against the counter with a cup of tea and judgemental frown.

“Um.” Sakura lowered the bottle and reconsidered her mug. “Hey.”

“Hi.”

He then took an economics textbook out of his backpack and went over to the couch, sitting beside her scrawled dresses and flower hats. She cringed, but he didn’t seem to notice her doodles. Sakura slowly made her way back to her book and sat as close to the edge as she could, at this point gulping down the sangria.

Seriously? Sakura thought. That was how he wanted to go about things? He wanted to ignore what happened three weeks ago that essentially set the shroud of awkward that hung over them whenever they saw each other in the kitchen or the hall or the living room?! What the actual fu—

Ugh.

When the silence became too much for her to concentrate in, she turned to Sasuke and found him already looking at her.

“How was your break?” she asked. Granted, KU didn’t really offer a “break” so much as one single day.

“Good.”

“What did you do?”

“Helped my mom cook,” Sasuke said.

Sakura grinned. “Since when do you cook?”

“Excuse you, but if I recall correctly, I’m not the one who set off the smoke alarm from boiling water.” Her eyes widened and he smirked.

“THAT WAS ONE TIME!” Still blushing, she kicked him, but he only grabbed her ankle to steady her. “Hmph. Well, what did you cook?”

“Mashed potatoes.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow. “Oh, and that’s just such a feat. Look at you Top Chef Wonder.” She giggled at her own not particularly funny joke and told herself it was way too early in the day to already be tipsy. But from what she could remember, Sasuke actually was a great cook. “Is that all you made?” she continued.

“I made a pie, too, actually,” he said. Then he pushed her leg off his lap and went back to the kitchen. The bounce of her foot on the cushion was what made her realize the Sasuke had actually been drawing nonsensical things on her calf andandand—

No. No, she told herself. This. Is not. Allowed.

Finally, he came back with a Tupperware and a fork, handing them to her.

“What is this?” she asked, drawing her legs in and sitting up straight.

“Pie.”

“Huh?”

“Pie,” he repeated. “I made pumpkin pie. It’s Itachi’s favourite and I remembered that it’s yours too so I brought a slice back for you.” Sasuke shrugged and all but buried himself in his economics textbook.

Sakura smiled at the gesture. “Thank you,” she mumbled, poking at the pie.

He glanced at her but saw her focused on the dessert. “You’re welcome,” he replied into his book.

And after finishing the slice, Sakura picked up her own book. The two sat on the couch for a few hours simply reading in a comfortable silence.

October also came to mean sucking up. October meant heading over to office hours (even the ones that started at 9AM) and making an impression and getting on your professor’s good side so that at the end of the semester, when they were determining Naruto’s participation grade, they would remember his bright hair and bright clothes at each and every lecture.

But this year, their final year, meant going to office hours would no longer just be about proposing separate essay topics or clarifying anything said in class.

This year meant reference letters.

Reference letters for grad school.

But those also meant office hours, which, with Naruto’s luck, meant 9AM with Dr. Kakashi Hatake – which actually kind of sort of meant 10AM considering the man was always late…

Still, that was early considering said hours were on a Friday.

“Let’s move, lazyass!”

“But I’m tired,” Naruto whined, lagging behind Sakura. “Can’t we just be death eaters?”

“No!”

“Or we can just be homeless,” he pointed out. They were on their way to the Humanities Building where Sakura was going solely as Naruto’s moral support while he asked for letters of recommendation. Naruto Uzumaki was going to graduate school, but… well, he was sort of too much of a wimp to approach his favourite professors alone. Likewise, Naruto may or may not have treated her to slash bribed her with a delicious lemon poppy seed muffin and chai tea latte for breakfast.

“I have worked too hard all these years to be homeless,” Sakura said between sips of her drink.

“Fine, not homeless, per se.” Nevertheless, Naruto continued along to the Humanities Building. He stopped the oblivious Sakura from walking into the doors, knowing that for whatever annoying reason, the automatic doors weren’t so automatic. He knew. He may or may not have walked into said doors before…

“Oh?”

“We can live in a box,” Naruto told her with a wink.

She rolled her eyes. “Just ask for your letters, Naruto.”

“I don’t know what to say!” But they were already in the elevator.

“You say ‘Hey, Kakashi, I really want to come back to KU for another year to do more readings and write more papers and lead more seminars yada yada yada.’ He’ll love it.” The sad thing was that Sakura wasn’t joking. She’d had Dr. Hatake in her first-year “Literature for our Time” course with Naruto and from her own visits and talks with the man, she’d come to know what he was like.

And well… Naruto looked like he was considering.

“Do you honestly think that would work?”

“I have full faith.”

She genuinely did.

Sakura herself had been going with the more formal approach of: “Dr. Whatever, would you be willing to write me a positive letter recommendation for X Med School?” Most of her professors were very familiar with her and her study habits and her amazing work, so Sakura didn’t actually need to put the operative “positive” in her requests, but it didn’t hurt to stay safe.

But with a professor like Kakashi, things would work out fine for Naruto.

They stood outside of Kakashi’s office and Sakura gave Naruto a pat on the back. “Do you have any idea what you’d want to research though?”

Naruto nodded. “Gothic literature!” he told her eagerly, looking ready to actually tell her more. “I’d like to look at the late eighteenth century and then maybe at the revival of Gothic literature in contemporary times. I mean, Gothic work is just so prevalent nowadays and—”

“Don’t tell me this stuff,” Sakura interrupted. She pointed to Kakashi’s open door. “Tell him!”

“Oh, right…” Naruto laughed awkwardly. “Okay. I can do this.”

“You can do this.”

“I can!”

“You can!”

“…I CAN’T.”

Fed up, Sakura pushed him into Kakashi’s office.

“Okay, so that went better than expected.”

Sakura rolled her eyes. “I told you.”

“Yeah, I know…” Naruto shrugged. “The entire asking-thing is just… nerve-wracking, I suppose.”

The two were at one of their favourite off campus haunts that served Sakura’s favourite sangria and made some of the greatest ramen Naruto had ever tasted. Sure, it was only noon, but it was never to early for wine and whining – at least, that was Sakura’s philosophy. And well, it had served her well for the past three years so…

Besides, it was Friday. Why not get nice and day drunk?

“So what schools are you applying to?” she asked Naruto.

“KU, of course,” Naruto listed through a grimace. “But… I don’t think I’ll get in. KU is so evil, Sakura-chan!”

She nodded. “Oh, I know.” While completing an undergraduate degree at KU was a magical feat in their humble opinions, to complete one and be accepted into the university’s graduate programs would be hard considering the CGPAs most KU students usually escaped with. While Sakura knew she wouldn’t have any problems, she did know that Naruto might. “Where else?”

“Not sure.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow. “What? Naruto, don’t just apply to one grad school if you’re set on doing your Master’s!”

“You don’t think I can get in?”

Sakura sighed. “It’s not like that,” she said, “it’s just that these are competitive programs. You should at least apply to more than one. I mean, what would you do if you didn’t get into KU?”

“…become a death eater?”

“You are so—so—” She sighed again and finished off her sangria. She poured another glass and sipped on that. “You’re like Ino.”

“What? I don’t like Ino!”

“Huh?” Sakura laughed. “No, I said you’re like her, not that you like her. That’d be weird.” In her semi-drunken state that was starting to become Sakura’s default state, she missed the red on Naruto’s cheeks.

“Well, how is Ino, anyway? I haven’t seen we had that kegger in September.” Both of them cringed, remembering their own personal awkward mistakes from that night. Naruto made a face. “Yeah. Ino.”

But Sakura snorted. “Who’s Ino? Oh! Did you mean Ino, the girl who’s apparently my bestie?” Sakura looked a little bit bitter. Maybe she was. Maybe she’s been in dire need of a girlfriend for the past two months but Ino hasn’t really been that great of a friend. “Yeah, she’s studying. She basically won’t have any human contact aside from lectures until she takes her LSATs in December.”

“I see.” Naruto noticed the sad look on Sakura’s face and wasn’t sure if she wanted a serious attempt at comfort or some kind of joke. “Well…” Naruto shrugged. “At least she has plans?”

“Yeah,” Sakura said with a nod. “I guess I just miss her.”

“What law schools will she apply to?”

“I DON’T EVEN KNOW THAT!” Sakura yelled. Her face crumpled and she took a long swig of her drink. “I miss her, Naruto. I know I’m being irrational and that my period is probably coming—”

“Thank you.”

“—but I mean it’s like she just doesn’t care about anyone right now!” Sakura refilled her glass and finished that in one go. Naruto subtly ordered another pitcher and Sakura continued: “I mean, I’m not trying to be clingy. I get it. She has stuff to do. But like, I’m living with Sasuke! HOW HAS SHE NOT EVEN ASKED ME IF THAT IS REMOTELY OKAY?!”

“Huh?” Naruto blinked. “I thought you said that you were okay with that… Sort of.”

“I am!”

“What?” God. Why were women so confusing?!

“I don’t care about Sasuke, Naruto!” Sakura looked at him like he was the one acting crazy. “What I’m saying is that Ino—my Ino—would have texted me the first night asking if I reacquainted myself with Sasuke, followed by an unnecessary amount of wink-faces! Current Ino responds to my text messages days late and never wants to hang out. Like I’m not even allowed to go to the library with her because she thinks I’ll distract her!”

“…you kind of are a huge distraction.” Which she was. As surprising as it was, Sakura was actually the one between the two of them that could be found not working (but still, unfairly enough, maintaining a 4.0 CGPA, so like what the hell).

“NOT THE POINT.”

Their next pitcher arrived and Sakura’s face lit up. “I’m just sad, I guess,” she admitted forlornly. “Or tired. A bit of both.” She sighed and suddenly looked a bit bashful. “I’m sorry. I’ve been ranting all this time. How are you and Sasuke doing?”

Naruto levelled her with a flat stare. “You make us sound like a couple.”

“Aren’t you?”

“SAKURA-CHAN!”

She giggled and Naruto let her. Mocking his “bromance” with Sasuke was always something that could make Sakura smile so he let it go. But suddenly the smile fell and she adopted a serious look. A bad serious look.

“Hey!” she yelled, grabbing his hand on the table. “Are you single?”

Naruto felt very, very uncomfortable with her hand on his. “What?”

“I have this friend,” she clarified. “She’s seen you in a lot of my photos and has probably stalked you on every possible social network. She thinks you’re really good-looking. She’s a super sweet girl and I think the two of you would hit it off really well.”

“Are you…” The words felt weird coming out of his mouth. “Are you trying to set me up?”

“No. Maybe. Yes.”

“What?” Naruto laughed at the mere idea. “What’s her name?”

“Hinata Hyuuga. Really smart, really sweet, really pretty. You’d like her.” Sakura pulled out her phone and logged into her Facebook to find the girl’s profile. She was about to show Naruto a picture but he covered the phone and placed it face-down on the table. “What?”

“I trust your judgement.”

Sakura blinked, utterly astonished. “So… you’ll go on a date with her?”

Musing over all the nothing that had been going on his life as of late, Naruto nodded. “Yeah, I’ll go on a date with her.”

NOVEMBERi need to go to sleep

November was the worst. November was when you got back your midterms or assignments, cried, rechecked said midterms or assignments, cried again, and then drowned your sorrows in your alcoholic beverage of choice.

For Naruto that was beer.

And as Naruto whined over the grade he got on the paper he wrote the morning it was due, Sakura rubbed his back with one hand and scrolled through the Recently Added section of Netflix.

“It could be worse,” Sakura said.

“How could it have been worse?” Naruto asked her, his eyes still trained on the bolded 72 at the bottom of the page.

“Naruto, a 72 by KU standards is actually pretty damn good!”

“Oh, shut up Miss 4.0. Leave me alone. Leave me to wallow in my sorrow and beer. There is nothing left for me. Alas, woe is me!”

Sasuke, on the other hand, wasn’t nearly as comforting. “Listen, dumbass. You passed. Passing is good, remember? You’re fine.”

“PASSING ISN’T ENOUGH FOR GRAD SCHOOL, SASUKE.”

He sat down beside Sakura, leaving her between the two boys. He handed her a mug of sangria and passed a brand new beer over to Naruto, letting him drink it between awkward whining noises that mimicked some sort of dying animal. Sakura looked ready to say some more words of consolation but Sasuke shook his head, signalling for her to stop. “Leave him be,” Sasuke said. “He’s always like this when he gets back a grade.”

“I know but…” Sakura glanced at Naruto. “He looks so pitiful.”

“I AM LITERALLY RIGHT BESIDE YOU, SAKURA-CHAN.” Naruto sat up straight, letting the blanket he’d wrapped himself in fall back a little. He stole the remote away from her and began to look through the files of movies and shows from Suigetsu’s hard drive that they had connected to the television. “My life is over.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. “Your life isn’t over.”

“It is.”

“You’re being an idiot.”

“Listen, Princess,” Naruto hissed, now glaring at Sasuke. “Not all of us have names that all but grant entry into programs and internships and all those other pretty things.”

Sasuke took offence to that. “I still need to maintain a good GPA to get in, Naruto. My name isn’t everything.”

Naruto didn’t seem to have any proper response to go with that so he simply stood up, tightened his burrito of a blanket, and waddled away. He came back a few seconds later to grab his beer, but still gave Sasuke and Sakura one last look of contempt before leaving.

“Such a baby,” Sakura mumbled when he was gone.

---

ALRIGHT AND THAT IS WHERE IT ENDED. i did find this though. i assume it was supposed to be part of the november chapter, which i never finished:

“Oh,” she said, understanding his look of awkwardness. She rolled her eyes. “No, this isn’t a gift with some meaning behind it, Sasuke. I mean, you made me pie, remember? It’s not like it had some implied Sakura-you-goddess-please-take-my-unworthy-self-back between the bites, right?” When he failed to reply, Sakura only frowned before shrugging the matter off. “The point is, this is a gift for you from me, Sakura the Friend.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Friend?”

She nodded. “Well we are friends, aren’t we?” She preferred ‘friends’ to ‘two people stuck being around each other despite lingering awkwardness simply because they had way too many mutual friends.’ “Sasuke?”

“Yeah,” he eventually replied. “We’re friends.”

Sakura grinned and patted the tablet. “Then accept my gift, friend.” She winked, emphasizing the word weirdly.

“Okay, don’t ever do that again.”

and then this the outline:

December: i need to study

Go sledding at the university

Have a snowball fight on the field

Everyone goes out to celebrate after Ino’s LSAT and get unbelievably drunk

Sasuke and Sakura have gotten back together, which Naruto knows but doesn’t call them on

Goes to his house for Christmas because her parents are travelling

Ino and Naruto hang out

NYE party at the house

Ends with Sakura checking her KU email and realizing there is a problem with her potential graduation

January: i need another vacation

Sakura ends up being in a Jane Austen course with Naruto because she was told she needed a humanities credit

February: i need to fix my habits

Go on a road trip for Reading Week

Come home Sunday night and scramble

March: i just need to graduate

Naruto and Sakura discuss their Big Boy/Girl jobs and the likeliness of them

Naruto reveals that he’s seriously dating Ino

Sakura is happy for him and tells him about Sasuke

“I know. It’s not hard to tell. Why do you think rent isn’t so bad in that house? The walls are paper thin, you bitch.”

Dread paying back student loans

Sakura tells him she’s nervous because Sasuke is studying abroad next year whereas Sakura’s dream school is KU’s med school – will they break up again

Doesn’t tell him she plans to backpack for the year

“Do you realize this is like… the last time?”

April: i need to get in

Acceptance letters

May: i need my damn grades

Go on another road trip to unwind

June: i need to go back

Convocation

and i found this, which i think is meant to be in the january chapter:

“There is something very, very wrong with a situation if you are taking a class to bum notes off of Naruto.”

Sakura merely laughed as she spread out some sheets of paper and pretended to read them. She still had another two hours of work and she wasn’t particularly inclined to, well, work, and Tenten—the girl she shared the front desk with—didn’t really care whether she did anything or not.

“I know that sounded really bad,” Sakura said, “but I just need a Humanities credit.”

“Still!” Tenten urged, not even looking away from her computer screen. “Naruto.”

“He’s not as dumb as everyone thinks he is, you know.”

Tenten considered this before shrugging. “I suppose. He has been at KU for the past four years and is even graduating on time.”

“Exactly.” Sakura moved onto the mug of pens on her desk, testing each one to see which still had ink. “And he’s actually really good at Lit courses.”

“He should be,” Tenten replied with a snort. “I mean, that is what he’s specializing in.” Her chair squeaked when she leaned back and pushed away from her desk to roll over near Sakura. Their desk was L-shaped with each of them on one side. “What course is it again?” she asked. But being the fidgety person that she was, Tenten moved to put away some student files. She climbed onto the stool and alphabetizing. “It was something cheesy.”

“Austen and Her Contemporaries.” Sakura hadn’t gotten past her first word before Tenten burst out into giggles. She couldn’t help but smirk when another thought came to mind. “Want to know something even better?”

Tenten gave Sakura her full attention. “Um, obviously.”

“Sasuke’s taking it with us too.”

oh man.

thank you for asking about this fic because i had absolutely no recollection of it but as i read all these docs, i realized how trashy i was in undergrad. and how frightened i was of graduating! just reading this makes me remember how afraid of growing up i used to be -- of not being a student and having to get a job and running out of time. but man i’ve been so much happier since then. the fear of “running out of time” is always around but i also have lost the will to care about people and/or things as the years have gone by.

ok sorry that totally wasn’t your question lmao. I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE ROLLERCOASTER OF THAT OUTLINE.

how did it end? well, everyone graduated. presumably everyone got into the post-grad programs of their dreams (although funding??). the naruto arc was totally based on me in my 4th year and his plans are NOT where my future went lmao. although to be clear, future him is definitely satisfied with where his life took him. ss and ni double dated happily ever after. maybe. probably.

#Anonymous

29 notes · View notes

mental-ch-illness · 5 years

Note

I...,,,.,.,.,.,am terrified to start college bc i have a 3 hour math class and literally since the beginning of school I've never been good at math and I'm just so scared im not gonna pass and let myself down once again

oh christ that sounds like a killer. i feel you nonnie, that really is very demotivating, but there is something you can do about it! i would talk to your college counselor about seeing if you can switch that class out for another one that isn’t so bunched up. 3 hours is an excessive amount of time to be spending on math and if you don’t feel confident in it you will wear yourself out quickly. if you can’t switch, maybe consider dropping the class and taking it next semester when a better time opens up.

if you are stuck with it, there are a few steps you can take as well. don’t bring your phone or laptop to class if you have to. those are huge distractors. kahn academy is your new best friend. sign up for a math tutor (most colleges have a free math lab!). don’t forget to ask your professor for help too! professors WANT to help you my dude.

i know how you feel about the fear of letting yourself down. i know i struggled with that a lot when i went to college, but you need to remember that there are things you can do to get this in your control. you made it this far because you worked hard, whether you believe it or not. maybe you didn’t have the most straight path, maybe you failed a class here or there, but you’re in college which signifies that yo, you did some good shit along the way. even if you fail this course, remember that you have other courses you did pass. it’s very easy to focus on a negative thing, so don’t forget to look at the good things you’ve done too!

#advice #Anonymous

11 notes · View notes

winemom-culture · 5 years

Text

other more materialistic factors im considering besides just doing some genuine soul searching and deciding what age group of children i’d really be happier working with:

1. whichever situation i can squeeze the most money out of. i don’t think it would make a difference money-wise either way right now because I’m like pretty much as high as i can currently be on pay scale we’re locked into. but my bosses are walking me through the process of getting my CDA through this fast track program which basically puts me on par with like someone who has a 2 year degree on the pay scale in like 3 days. something i wasn’t planning on doing, because it’s expensive out of pocket and i’m doing my actual 2 year degree anyways (slowly but surely), but they know of a scholarship they can get me that covers the whole thing i guess, so, that is a thing now. i was gonna talk to them more about when i get my CDA and am eligible for the raise that they’ve already told me flat out they are ready to give me i JUST need the certification... if maybe at that point there’s somewhere where they need me more than the other.....and maybe we can...... negotiate sumn..........

2. i’ve thought about maybe also switching with the stipulation that i’ll finish out this semester full-time but at the beginning of next year dropping down to part-time, because i really am just working to put away money now and my main focus is saving/grinding through school. so like, it works out bc when i get the CDA & make more money it would balance out the cut in hours and i could take on more classes that way. it would just be a really nice much needed break to work part-time while i don’t need the full-time money mentally too

idk!

2 notes · View notes

caatws · 5 years

Text

i know i’m privileged in the fact that i am able to attend film school and pursue a creative passion in this way, but i also hope people understand it isn’t easy, stress-free, or even completely fun, mostly for poc and lgbtq+ folks.

white film students don’t think twice before making the casts and crews of their student films all white. my film student friends of color, meanwhile, often struggle to cast their student films, sometimes left with incomplete casts all the way up until the first day of production or having to cast inexperienced actors and/or ppl who don’t act at all, because they want to use actors who look like and represent them, too, just like white film students. but we don’t get that privilege, and it makes the process of making the damn film 1000x harder.

i’ve been questioned ad nauseam in three (3) separate classes about the same-sex (f/f) relationship in my feature film script, to the point that i don’t even want to touch this story anymore and it’s put me 20 pages behind in my rewrite this semester bc just the thought of writing it, then presenting it to my mostly white cishet class, stresses me out.

i’ve had to sit through white professors rant about how “pc” culture is ruining art/film.

i’ve had to listen to one professor advise my class to “not just make a character a poc just for diversity’s sake”, but rather make a character a poc for a specific reason, something that reflects in their dialogue/behavior/character (because apparently me being filipino is evident in the way i do literally anything?).

i’ve had to debate between challenging professors’ advice and notes on my work that involve giving voices to characters who reflect societal vices that i don’t want to write (ex: my adaptations prof wants me to adapt the novel passing [1929], which is about half-black/half-white women navigating social spaces as ppl who can pass for white, as a modern story about people who are “transracial” like rachel dolezal) and thus creating possible drama in class, or just shutting up and going with it to get the assignment done.

film is cool. film is challenging. but it’s so, so hard to navigate as a minority, without disturbing the peace or being told you’re “too pc” or criticized bc you’re not willing to go to stupid lengths to be as ridiculous and offensive and edgy as possible. it’s picking your battles, figuring out when it’s justifiable to yourself and those in your community to sacrifice your personal morals/beliefs to alleviate the stress/pressure those around you are forcing onto you. it’s the anxiety you feel when pitching your story about the poc and/or lgbtq+ experience to a classroom of mostly white, cishet peers (and almost always a white cishet prof), who will offer their notes in the context of their own lived experiences which differ greatly from your own.

it’s not outright racism/homophobia/misogyny/etc. it can be, sometimes, but not always. and it’s that subtle kind - the extensive questioning, the overanalysis, the ease some will automatically have in their filmmaking process bc they don’t have to consider the under-representation of themselves/their community when they create art - that makes it really tricky to navigate.

and yes, this isn’t a universal problem, this is a “first world problem” or whatever, it’s a problem built upon privilege (getting to pursue film at all). but if you want to even begin to discuss media representation problems, it needs to be part of the conversation, because this is the kind of shit that can derail young ppl’s film careers before they can even begin - at the collegiate level - because it requires so much emotional labor that i can’t blame anyone for dropping film for their own sanity.

#madison.txt #film school #long post #this got rly long oof #idk this has just been on my mind lately bc of some stuff that happened in my classes this sem #and when i brought it up in therapy my counselor was like it is completely natural and rational for you to feel like that based on everythin #*everything #and i was like damn...thank u therapist #like ok can i just. complain abt the movie i'm writing for a minute #the protagonist is bi and i always. get questions abt this???#like 'oh when does she come out' or 'does everyone know she's bi' or insert some other random thing abt being bi #here's a concept....a movie with an lgbtq+ lead...that DOESN'T include a coming out scene??#or extensive exposition abt when precisely they came out/who they're out to/how they're publicly out #maybe....MAYBE.....that's not always important when that isn't the actual focus of the story #lgbtq+ character: breathes #cishet film students: oMG BUT WHEN DID THEY COME OUT????

11 notes · View notes

4lix · 6 years

Text

restless nights; lee minho

[listening to] .... babybaby; suran

Hi bubs, may I request a college au with Minho where the reader works at the coffee shop on campus (saving money because college is expensive af) and Minho having no sleep needs coffee, bus is awakened by the beauty of the reader?

can you do coffee shop minho but he’s like, totally not coffee shop material haha like he’s a dancer or something and school isn’t his thing and hes just really flirty?? if that makes sense????? thank you!!!! <3

okay so these two were a bit similar

so me and my third eye decided to combine them

bc coffee au x college au WITH MINHO? bitch its an experience

so basically as the struggling college student you are who is living off of ramen noodles and the potato chips you found in the back of your cabinet last semester, you decided to get a job

but lets get real who the hell wants to work

luckily the sweet old lady who owns the cafe down the block from your campus recently decided to go 24 hours

which meant more shifts available

and meant you could maybe eat something besides ramen noodles and god was that a blessing.

luckily you had afternoon classes, so working the night shift wasn’t an issue, plus it was only ever just you and a few customers, so the shift was quiet, peaceful, and you could get extra studying in when customers weren’t bothering you.

for months working there it was peaceful, almost too peaceful, on the verge of being mind-numbingly boring

the only people who ever came in were miserable college students and old men who played bingo in the back

until a week before finals, a boy who looked like he hasn’t slept in a billion years came stumbling inside, making all types of noise and heavy rap music blasting through his headphones, ruining the previously peaceful atmosphere

he doesn’t look like the type of boy to be in a coffee shop

he had this rugged look about him, hair an absolute mess and shoved inside of a beanie messily, his clothing a bit oversized and hanging off his body, and an adidas duffel bag alongside his backpack hanging off his shoulders

probably an athlete of some sort

he was your only customer you had all night

the boy clearly lacked sleep, after he threw all his shit on a random table in the corner of the cafe, he stumbled over towards the counter eyes lazily meeting yours

as cliche as it is, the moment his eyes landed on your face, it’s like a surge of energy ran through his body

he immediately straightened his figure, clearing his throat before trying to smile nicely, his previously pale face warming up to a shade of pretty pink

“h-hi..” he mutters nervously, and you greet him nicely with what you’ve been trained to say to everyone that walks in.

“hello! what can i get for you tonight? we’re doing a promotion for our night owls, free refills on all lattes after midnight!” you say with a bright smile and you swear you see him melt right then and there before he shakes his head and lets out of small laugh

“honestly, i don’t even really like coffee.” he admits and you turn your head in a bit of confusion

“so what exactly are you doing at a coffee shop?” you ask amusedly, and the boy with eye bags deeper than oceans looks up to meet eyes with you and maybe it was you melted that this time

he was... cute, dare you say the cutest boy you’ve ever seen, although you know most people wouldn’t consider this look he was sporting to be too attractive... i mean the boy had a hole in his shirt and his hair looks like it hasn’t been brushed in days

“well there’s one thing i hate more than coffee.” he says simply, taking off his beanie briefly and running his fingers through his hair

and just fuck it killed you

“it’s getting kicked off the dance team because i’m failing organic chemistry. also now that i’m here, a pretty face like yours is definitely a reason to stick around” he says with a wink.

god where the hell did this boy come from

it was ass o clock and he clearly hadn’t slept in what looked like days but the flirtatious parts of his brain were working harder than the u.s marines.

you stammered on your next words, cheeks dusting a slight pink, “u-uh-””

“i just need something that will wake me up, i have a quiz at noon tomorrow and i haven’t studied at all, whip me up something real good yeah?”

in with that he drops a bill on the table, saying a quick keep the change babe before he winks one last time, turns around and heads back to his seat

well its safe to say your kidney imploded

why was he so ridiculously attractive?

you couldn’t even move for a few moments after he walked away, and you swore you heard chuckles coming from his corner of the cafe, the little shit was amused by it all wasn’t he?

shaking your head, you start queueing up an order for your favorite latte on the menu with the most amount of caffeine possible. the boy looked dead, he’d need lots of it.

how exactly were you going to even give the boy his damn drink

even pushing the buttons for placing his order had your face burning red

nonetheless you make the drink to the best of your ability, never bothering to care about measurements but fuck when its a customer that beautiful? suddenly you love your job, call you the world’s finest barista.

while the coffee brewed, you couldn’t help but gaze dazedly at the boy across the room.

he came here to study but it looked like he was already knocked out cold, head resting in his arms, his face completely exposed and you just abashedly admired his charms and beauty from afar.

when the drink was finally done, you almost didn’t want to move his figure, but if the mountain of papers next to his body was anything to go by, he needed to be up and working.

you nudge him slightly, “white chocolate mocha with five shots of espresso.” you state simply, proud of yourself for not stuttering

his eyes slowly open, falling onto you and the cup in your hands

he smiles kindly at you, thanking you before taking the drink out of your hands

“let me know if you like it, if there’s any changes you want made I can fix it no problem!” thank goodness for all the training and practice you’ve had saying your directed lines, if it wasn’t for the training you’d probably be stumbling over every syllable.

he takes a sip, and instantly his eyes widen.

“woah, i don’t even like coffee, but this is fucking amazing.” he compliments and you smile at him gratefully before taking your leave back behind the counter

the rest of the night is slow, just the sound of the boy typing away at his computer and the occasional turn of a page as you try to cram through reading a literature essay.

“ahem”

you look up, it’s the boy again, a mischiveous smile on his face

“could i get that refill?” he asks but there’s a lilt to his voice, something that makes you feel like he’s onto something, but you just nod regardless, turning around and whipping it up for him

he takes it thankfully and winks again

you go back to your essay

fifteen minutes pass, and you hear footsteps walking towards the front counter again

“refill?” he says with a grin and you tilt your head slightly, “i just gave you one?”

“i already finished it, it’s free refills after midnight right?”

“well yeah but-”

“okay so i’d like a refill on my white chocolate mocha latte with five shots of espresso.” he says with a stupid grin and you find yourself getting slightly annoyed with the boy and his antics but nonetheless you turn around and prepare another drink for him

this goes on for another hour

you’ve made him like eight drinks

and god knows how he hasn’t exploded from all the liquid in his system

it isn’t until 4am, just an hour before your shift ends that the boy finally rises out of his seat, nine drinks later, stretching

he begins packing up his stuff and you can’t tell if you’re relieved or kind of upset that he’s leaving.

he stops by the counter one last time before he goes, sliding a paper your way

“y’know i ordered all those drinks in hopes that you’d write your number down on one of them, but, seems like you didn’t get my drama reference.” that dumb smirk is back on his face and your face is burning up again, a laugh slipping past your lips

“instead of abusing me at work like this, you could’ve just asked for my number, you know that right? i went through like a pound of coffee beans and a carton of creamer because of you.”

“and to think every cup was delicious to the last drop... you need a raise, really.” he slides a piece of paper toward you, “text me and maybe i can make you coffee next time?”

“you dont even like coffee, do you even know how to make it?”

“i’ll learn.”

“just for me? wow what a charmer you are.”

“i get that a lot.” he winks

“is your eye okay? you’ve winked like fifty times tonight.” you tease

“technically it’s morning.”

“technically you’re irritating.”

he chuckles at your sassiness.

“you’re cute. ... y/n?” he reads your nametag

“hate to say it but you’re kind of cute too.....” you hesitate for a moment, realizing you dont know his name

“minho, lee minho, i gotta get going, but text me, or else i’m coming back here tomorrow and i’m gonna order a hundred cups this time.”

“i’m going to ban you from ever coming back to this cafe.”

“you’d never.”

“what makes you so sure of that?”

“well, if you did, who would you stare at all night if i wasn’t here?” for fucks sake he winks again and even makes a kissy face before throwing his backpack over his shoulder

“text me!” is all he shouts before leaving and you cup your face trying to calm the heat in your cheeks

you do text him, in fact you talk for hours, but he still decides to come to bother you for another night and it seemingly never ends as minho becomes a regular at the cafe.

you aren’t complaining though, the night shift isn’t so lonely with him here.

let’s talk! („ᵕᴗᵕ„) [cc] https://curiouscat.me/chansmaid

[twitter] https://twitter.com/9lovelys

#minho #lee minho #lee minho imagines #lee minho scenarios #lee minho requests #lee know #lee know imagines #lee know scenarios #lee know requests #stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios

132 notes · View notes