#i was like 'i will draw a lot of elias. as a treat' because i had a hard exam week | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

catofadifferentcolor · 2 years

Text

Terrible Fic Ideas #5: The White Princess, but make it GoT

I have a terrible weakness for female!Jon Snow fics - mostly because making the character female gives a fascinating array of opportunities to unite two rival claims to the Iron Throne and all the drama that involves. So what about a fic where the people with the strongest claim to the throne - female!Jon Snow and Robert Baratheon - end up married?

Hear me out:

Much as Elizabeth of York objectively had a better claim to the throne than her husband, Henry VII, a female!Jon Snow (called Joanna from here on out) would have the Targaryen bloodline claim but no chance of getting on the throne herself even if she wasn't presented to the world as her uncle's bastard. Westeros doesn't abide female rulers.

But if you marry her bloodline claim to the man with the next best claim - her second cousin once removed, Robert Baratheon, who's actually got the throne - you have the strongest of any possible claim. One which could make the greatest number of factions happy, if only they knew about it.

But how to make it happen? It's easy to imagine Robert trying to take Joanna to bed, as she resembles her mother a great deal, but how to make it a legal union? I see two options:

One: In the aftermath of the Greyjoy Rebellion, Robert heads north, sees 14 year old Joanna looking the image of his lost love, and pulls out some ancient Targaryen law that lets the king have two wives. No one is particularly thrilled with this idea except for Robert, but he's the king and the most optimistic hope it will turn down his whoring. Or,

Two: In the aftermath of the Greyjoy Rebellion, Robert heads north after Cersei has been found in the act of adultery while he was at war, and seeing Joanna the image of his lost love demands they marry on the spot. No one's particularly happy with this scenario either, but at least it's not bigamy.

Either way, Joanna ends up in Kings Landing as a/the Queen and because Robert is his usual lusty self, winds up with a son in short order. If it Cersei's still in the picture, there's a lot of politicking and worry for her life and that of her child. If Cersei's gone, there's still politicking but with whatever Lannisters remain upset her child is replacing their prince, who they claim is legitimate still.

Sometime while she's still a relatively young bride of 16 or 17, while she's about halfway through her second pregnancy, Robert dies like in the book, and Joanna ends up the regent to her young son, the new king. There's a regency council of course, but she has more power than one might think at first glance.

The truth of her ancestry is never really announced so much as quietly discovered by multiple parties in multiple ways, who quietly go along with it because it suits their needs/politics/etc. Eventually the various parties wonder why everyone else is going along with it too, and after some poking it just sort of... comes out. It doesn't change anything, because inheritance puts her son's claim before her own, but it helps the last of her detractors.

As a side plot, Prince Oberyn comes to Kings Landing to swear Dorne's allegiance to the new king on his brother's behalf and strikes up a flirtation with Joanna. At first that's all it is, especially as she's just about to birth her second child, but they end up forming an odd friendship. Joanna likes Dorne and how they treat their bastards, and Dorne likes her because they think her mother was one of theirs. After 2 or 3 years of this, they marry. It's part political - draws in Dorne, helps make up for Elia's murder, and gives Joanna and her son a loyal defender - and part a love match - they get along and Joanna begrudges Oberyn his paramours no more than she'd begrudged Robert.

That's all I really have, but the idea tickles me. So feel free to borrow it, just link me if you ever do anything with it.

More Terrible Fic Ideas

#game of thrones #got #plot bunny #fic ideas #female jon snow #jon snow is a targaryen #robert baratheon #asoiaf #a song of ice and fire

62 notes · View notes

camotherogue · 2 years

Note

HANS !!!!!!!!! for Hans obvi ^^

OUGHGHG BESTIE TY FOR ASKING

H - Height There's a pretty high chance of a height difference between us/Hans and Elias (my s/i's name)! I'd say at least half a foot, as Elias is a whopping 5' 2"/157.5 cm tall. And Hans 100% teases him with it, which is always entertaining because, while it isn't quite a sensitive topic, Elias does get irritated at its inability to reach high shelving. That being said Hans thinks the difference is cute and I like to think he's a big fan of it for cuddles n stuff .///////. (not that hes always the big spoon/holder in such cases, Elias/I am very much a big spoon if given the opportunity)

A - Art Hans didn't get much time to himself at home to learn much in the way of artistic skill, or even to figure out he enjoys it, but after the events of the first movie and his arrival in Port Solvbrygge, he discovers he has an interest in pencil drawing! And yes this is entirely fabricated from my yearning thoughts but I like to think he learned this about himself while helping Elias journal the progress of his garden, or maybe one of Elias' regular patrols through the woods surrounding the town where he writes down any changes in the environment and such. And afterwards, Hans has Elias teach him basic technical skills for pencilwork and its very nice and cute and i hgoughghghgh

N - Nostalgia Due to his, ah, home life (especially his childhood), Hans has very few pleasant memories from his young life, and even fewer that take place at home. Using that as a springboard to once again talk about him and my s/i, I think one of his fond experiences/memories is helping Elias with rots garden, rot teaching him how to care for each plant and slowly learning how to care for them if Elias isn't able to at the moment. It helps give him a better appreciation for the normal and the mundane, a big part of the character arc I made for him is Hans learning to see the beauty in everyday life and in the world around him with Elias' help.

S - Story Considering the setting of Frozen, I think it's close enough to a fairytale that it's kind of difficult for me to say! But a big part of the story surrounding Elias definitely paints him as the village resident with a secret type, and much of his backstory centers around his ostracization due to his changeling nature (despite rot being unaware of it). And Hans is obvious on that front, the former prince, disgraced by the throne and turned bad. If I had to pick fairytale morals and archetypes for them, I think Elias would be the hooded outcast stranger who approaches Hans, an outcast and exile in his own right, asking to stay the night and have shelter from the approaching storm (a classic fairytale, of course). A moment of kindness has Hans invite rot in, and without knowing what Elias is or who he is, engages him in a friendly manner and they become close. Unbeknownst to Hans, Elias is being pursued by some knight order/witch hunt of sorts, and Hans helps hide Elias in his home when they stop by. I could honestly write a whole AU based on this but basically the ending moral of the tale would be "Do kindness unto others, for they will have your back if you are ever in need" as Elias protects Hans from some kind of bounty hunter after the ex-prince's head, revealing rots true nature in the process. But instead of turning on Elias afterwards out of fear, Hans treats it no differently than before, and they remain very close and get hitched eventually.

WOW that last one was a lot (it is in no way canon as a whole but small parts of it do parallel my actual story for them). I hope you enjoyed reading all that, and ty for enabling me about Hans words cannot express how much I love this man.

#selfshipping #f/o chatter #frozen hans #hans of the southern isles #not art #askbox #pinkdinkydoon #camosselfinserts

12 notes · View notes

wits-half · 2 years

Text

babygirl:(

#SPOILERS FOR PLATOON IN TAGS!!!!!!#platoon #elias grodin #first of all how cool is his name????? it's so fucking nice sounding. me drooling over character naming. more likely than you think #i was like 'i will draw a lot of elias. as a treat' because i had a hard exam week #but i did only one and it took me like 6 hours??? fuck that #okay second of all. literally ignoring canon again #they fucking Slaughtered my baby. my baby boy. my little sunshine #au where everything's okay<3 i literally don't care. they picked him up on a fucking chopper i don't give a shit<3 #i love him so much he's just a lil hippie with a gun #jefferson airplane playing so hard rn #tried a new style of coloring and it's equally as hard as all the other ones because i never fucking learned color theory #willem dafoe #fuck it. bye sweaty #okay i just realised im not stable it's 5 in the morning i might start crying because of him #nik draws

139 notes · View notes

cristanix09 · 2 years

Text

Summer Samy The Hedgehog- Reference Sheet

Let's start with the summer:

*Name: Summer Samy The Hedgehog

*Age- 17 years

*Gender: Female

*Height: 99 cm

*Weight: 33 kg

*Species: Albino Hedgehog

*Personality: Summer is a cool, ambiverted girl, who likes dark things, she is kind of clumsy and cheerful, radical and tomboyish, but elegant, spontaneous and creative!

*Likes💜: chocolate, dark colors, rock, playing guitar and singing; likes extreme sports, rollerblading, drawing, parkour, ninja skills (even if you don't have it), martial arts, your new friends, your new time, helping people, alone in your corner, electronic pop music, bragging a bit, food savory or sweet, chilli dog, practicing her powers, yolks, her sister Sarah, Silver The Hedgehog, Espio The Chameleon, cheers up the crowd and the female force!

*Dislikes: Mona The Fox, Doctor Eggman, being underestimated, being looked down upon and called blind (due to eye color) or ex-villain; Deadly Six, Fang the sniper, machismo, skateboarding, playing too many games (she's not very good at it), Honey the cat, people playing the victim, working under pressure, hurting someone, too much heat, following boring, pointless rules, staying in one place, reading, novels, pink, frufru things, skirts or high, thin heels; Strawberry, lots of mess, classic songs, mayonnaise and Princess Elise! *

(Your BBFS) Sonic The Hedgehog, Tangle, Lisa The Chameleon, Silver the Hedgehog(Crush), Julie Su, Charmy Bee, Espio The Chameleon, Elias Acorn, Nicole The Lynx, Rouge The Bat, Omega123, Shadow The Hedgehog, Mighty The Armadillo and Sarah The Hedgehog (His sister) *

(Enemies) All except Scourge The Hedgehog and Infinite The Jackal (brother-in-law).

* Powers (by birth) Your psychic powers, psychic shields and visions of the future (by dreams).

*Powers(technological): Create portals, shields and scythes of leisure, nanotechnology and skates.

*Family:

Sarah The Hedgehog: Big Sister

Infinite The Jackal: Brother-in-Law REVEALED❗❗❗❗❗❗

Richard the Hedgehog: Dad

Nilcy Samy The Hedgehog: Mother

Silver The Hedgehog (Crush Summilver)

Espio The Chameleon (Crush Summerspio)

Curiosities:

*Summer is part of the Team Dark!

*Summer likes Naruto and Full Metal!

*Summer would previously be called Samara, and would be a purple panther (but I changed it)

* Would be summer shifter!

*Summer has trypophobia (agony or fear of small holes in pictures or objects, jagged holes) and has touch!

*Summer is still not good with telekinetic flight

(learns from Silver)

*Summer was once a villain, but changed sides!

*Summer, related to the size of her powers, she is similar to Shadow The Hedgehog

*Summer's favorite food is Doritos.

*Summer and Blaze are not "friends", they are more rivals, because Blaze doesn't like villains and distrusts Summer, and Summer doesn't like princesses (in her opinion), because she thinks most are arrogant!But there is no enmity because of Silver (The one who is friends with both)

*Summer is one of the few who is intimate with Elias Acorn (Sally's older brother)

*Summer treats Charmy like a little brother.

#oc girl group #sonic fan oc #sonic oc #sonicoc #summersamythehedgehog #sonic fc #reference #reference sheet #character sheet #art digital

14 notes · View notes

taxinealkaloids · 2 years

Note

Hi! I was wondering if you would like to say something ab your Elias, Gertrude, and Agnes dynamic because if yes I would love to hear it

(Also, your art is absolutely amazing. Sjdhwhdhehdheh thank you so much for drawing 💖)

Thanks! I’d like to start posting art more consistently but I’ve been so busy.

Also, YES absolutely I would like to talk about Them, at some point it’d be nice to present all this in a more organized manner but for now I’ll just throw some thoughts at you. (under a cut because it ended up being a bit on the lengthy side oops)

My general concept for these three is that due to Gertrude and Elias being connected through Beholding (I like to treat this bond as a lot more substantive than it was shown to be in canon because frankly it’s a crime that it wasn’t further explored and utilized as a plot device) at the same time that Gertrude and Agnes are bound due to Gertude’s semi-failed attempt to cripple the Desolation, the three have all ended up stuck in the same spiderweb, so to speak. I haven’t quite decided if the Web meant for Elias to get roped into this or if, like in canon, the extent of it’s plan was to weave Gertrude & Agnes together. I think it’d be interesting if they were all meant to get tied up together because I like to think of the mother of puppets as a better schemer than she ended up being in canon and because it adds another layer of mystery for the three of them to deal with (ie, what exactly is the Web hoping to achieve here? None of them are sure how extensive the plot is, so it’s an unknown factor; something that fundamentally does not agree with the base nature of anyone eye-aligned.) This connection manifests itself by causing the three to occasionally walk in each other’s dreams, randomly receive each other’s thoughts and feelings, and even have brief body-switching experiences where it’s like suddenly one person’s consciousness is in the other’s body (like the characters in Sense8 do, if you’ve seen that show). In general those episodes only last a few seconds but are extremely disorienting. There’s definitely quite an adjustment period when all this starts happening and everyone’s dealing with the sudden random urges to commit arson or fill out Excel spreadsheets. It’s especially a danger for Elias and Gertrude who are both trying to hide things. Having your mind occasionally taken over by the very person you’re trying to hide those things from is incredibly antithetical to that goal. I have a lot of half-formed ideas for problems that could arise due to these kinds of things happening unpredictably at undesirable times, I think it could range from very dramatic to absolutely hilarious which is fun to play with.

I imagine any sort of plot around these 3 would revolve around trying to unravel the Web’s plot and figure out what exactly the nature/purpose of their connection is (and potentially sever it). However, they can’t work together to solve it, because of course they’ve all got layers upon layers of ulterior motives and are nearly as concerned with sabotaging each other as they are with sabotaging the Web (which, of course, is what the Mother was counting on).

Elias: if I play my cards right here, I could potentially use this to figure out and stop the Web and the Desolation

Agnes: If I play my cards right here, I could potentially use this to figure out and stop the Web and Beholding

Gertrude: I could stop all three.

And so instead of pooling their resources they’re all going behind each other’s backs and lying about it and using their bodyhopping/mindsharing/dreamwalking occurrences as opportunities to spy on each other and/or surreptitiously glean info from the others without them knowing that’s what’s going on. This is a ridiculous undertaking, honestly, because even if they weren’t semi-telepathically linked and therefore likely to figure out what the others are doing anyway, Elias is watching most of what the other two are doing at all times and usually knows when they’re lying. So a lot of their group conversations are just…everyone tells everyone else blatant lies about what they’ve been up to, everyone is aware these are blatant lies, and no one calls anyone out because…. pot, kettle, you know?

Agnes is generally pretty happy to share her experiences with the Desolation w/ Gertrude; she’s never gotten a chance to talk about them to anyone outside the cult and likes Gertrude’s straightforward, free-from-religious-bias responses to what she has to say. Gertrude is able to get a lot out of her just by asking and she’ll even reveal quite a lot to Elias, though that’s usually more by accident. She wants to talk and often lets slip more than she means to.

Gertrude is a bit more wary and holds those of Beholding’s secrets that she knows a bit closer to her chest; she doesn’t want to tell any associate of the Lightless Flame something that could potentially help them trigger a Desolation-flavored apocalypse.

Meanwhile Elias doesn’t so much hold his secrets close to his chest as “keep them in a hermetically sealed double-locked encoded safe in the secret basement of his brain” and there’s no way anyone’s drilling him for information without him clocking it right away and subtly shifting the conversation to a more advantageous subject (for him). The instant Agnes and/or Gertrude show up in one of his dreams he immediately switches whatever it is to the most banal, irrelevant scene ever, like being stuck in traffic or doing his taxes. (What’s the point in living so long if you can’t even control your own dreams, right?)

(Gertrude and Agnes: Really? THIS is what you dream about??)

(Elias, completely stonefaced: Yes.)

While Elias tends to favor gathering and analyzing information to fully understand a situation before acting on it, Gertrude (and to some degree Agnes) feel more productive when they’re actually out doing legwork. So Gertrude’s breaking into Elias’s office to scan his files, she’s vanishing halfway across the country to chase a lead without so much as a day’s notice, Agnes is taking a page out of the Beholding avatars’ book and conducting “interviews” for information (she starts with her cultist minders and spreads outwards from there) but instead of using the Beholding power of compulsion to help the conversation along, she’s using the less delicate but undoubtedly effective Desolation method of “fire really close to the subject’s face”, and Elias is…doing none of this but rather simply watching the other two do it and ending up with the same information in the end. Works out for him!

The main problem here is the fact that with everyone trying to go behind everyone else’s backs all the time they end up impeding each other’s efforts to get the Web pinned down and, with them also spending so much time focusing on stopping each other’s entities, the spotlight is shifted off of the Web. so their behavior is really playing into the Mother’s hands (all eight of them).

In terms of general interpersonal relationships:

Gertrude and Elias are…not friends. Both are pretty sure they’re smarter than the other and definitely entertain frequent fantasies of murdering each other when one’s finding the other particularly infuriating. Despite that they actually end up just...hanging out a lot because they both have a habit of using their friends to death (which is why it’s a good thing they’re not friends). They have the same sense of humor though and honestly they probably don’t find the other’s company as distasteful as they like to claim.

Plus, the entire archive staff is scared of at least one if not both of them, and the fact that they seem to spend so much time in close collaboration doesn’t make anyone more inclined to establish social connections with either one. So they’re kind of workplace allies by default. (Honestly most of the staff assumes they’re sleeping together and because this rumor raises infinitely less questions than “they’re working to prevent the incorrect apocalypse from happening before they can make the correct apocalypse happen” they let it propagate)

(tbh it probably happened once but they both agreed to never mention it again.)

Also, I think Gertrude knew near immediately that Jonahlias was in no way the same person as Elias-Elias but didn’t do anything because tbh she didn’t care for og Elias and liked him better now that he’d apparently been taken over by some sort of bodysnatching monster (though obvs she would NOT admit that).

So, like, first meeting she had w/ him after his promotion she walks in, takes one look, and internally is like “ah. This man is no longer Elias Bouchard. Thank God, maybe I can actually work with him after all.”

Likewise, the instant Gertrude walked in with her soul tied up with the Desolation’s Messiah he noticed but said nothing about it. (I think the mark left on her by the Desolation would show up as something he could physically see; she mentioned in one of the statements that the bond hurt so maybe her flesh always looks a bit like it’s being set on fire from the inside out to someone with supernatural vision powers and he just has to pretend this isn’t alarming.)

For his part, Elias genuinely likes Gertrude. Most of the time. At least some of the time. He respects her and her utter ruthlessness for sure, but she’s extremely strong willed and nigh impossible to intimidate and he fluctuates wildly from being like “she was the perfect choice for Archivist, I’m so glad I picked her” and “I need to kill her right now immediately and get a new Archivist, I cannot work with this one”.

Agnes is…an interesting case because due to her bizarre upbringing she has a hard time figuring out what she feels about anything, ever. She wildly fluctuates from being overly sensitive/worried about hurting others to being absolutely sadistic, and can jump from a calm/withdrawn state to pure rage in an instant. She’s largely still figuring out who she wants to be while struggling with the fact that she’s not meant to get to pick who she wants to be at all.

Gertrude and Agnes find each other absolutely fascinating, they both think the other is the most compelling person they’ve ever met (or, rather, not met, it’s complicated). Agnes likes having a connection to someone outside the lightless flame cult, and likes the idea that Beholding’s archivist (who is rather infamous among lightless flame cultists and unanimously feared) ‘belongs to her.’ (Gertrude would maybe not entirely agree with that perspective but she doesn’t…hate the idea either).

Meanwhile, Gertrude knows their bond is part of a bigger scheme and on some level, the Web is tying them all in knots, and really she should be looking for a way to sever the bond. And she will! She’s definitely planning on figuring that one out. Elias accuses her of putting it off in order to find out more about Agnes and the lightless flame, and yeah, maybe she is, but so what? That’s useful information. And Elias must agree, or he would have sounded more upset. (He does agree, but he also dislikes the idea of Gertrude being part of someone else’s scheme and he REALLY dislikes the idea of being part of someone else’s scheme himself.)

Elias finds Agnes interesting the way one would find, say, a new species of venomous snake interesting; there’s a lot to be learned from careful observation and the implications of it’s existence are intriguing but you don’t want it near you. Her volatile nature makes her unpredictable, which makes her dangerous.

As a result he tends to use what knowledge he has about Agnes, the Desolation, and her fate as leverage to make his incineration less appealing. This works, for the most part; while Agnes finds it extremely irritating she also does want to hear what a Beholding-aligned non-cultist can tell her about her nature. She just does not appreciate Elias’s insistence on being infuriatingly obtuse all the time.

Agnes also does not appreciate the idea that the Archivist does not, in fact, belong entirely to her and that she has to share custody with this guy. Who even is this guy. She’d like to set all his paperwork on fire. (Really she’d like to set HIM on fire but Gertrude said she couldn’t.)

One thing Agnes does admire (or at least find interesting) about Elias is his usage of compulsion to get people to tell him things. She can definitely appreciate the usefulness of that, having grown up with a bunch of crazed zealots who refused to give her a straight answer about anything, and even ends up employing similar tactics herself, as I mentioned earlier. She knows Gertrude and Elias have very different perspectives on how compulsion should be utilized and privately, she agrees with Elias. If one has an advantage, why not use it? She doesn’t tell Gertrude this, nor does she tell her about the “interviews” she conducts, though she often wants to.

All three of them have very unique brands of incredible interpersonal tension with each of the others, so when they’re all sharing a dream at the same time the atmosphere is less “electric” and more “nuclear reactor meltdown”. They’re not sure that they could actually kill each other through dream-to-dream communication (Elias doesn’t think so, so probably not) but chances are that’s gonna be put to the test at some point.

I actually started drafting a fic about all this at one point lmao just cause I had so many ideas for specific scenes I thought would be interesting but realistically I’ll never have time to finish that. Still I definitely want to expand on all this because I’m obsessed with their potential AND the actual canon of tma pretty much never went into it so….my house now. Thanks so much for indulging me on this sdkjfhskj I thought this would be so much shorter than it ended up being

#asks #tma #thank you for giving me an excuse to go on abt this sdskj there's so much content i want to produce about these three #and so little time to make it

13 notes · View notes

fakecrfan · 3 years

Note

Do you think Basira and Daisy had a healthy relationship?

I am so glad you asked! I have had a lot of thoughts about their relationship, but had decided to shelve those thoughts because I was worried it would come off as me telling people to not ship Daisira, which is... not what I want to be doing. But you sent me an Ask and so I am compelled to answer!

My answer is: no. Their relationship is toxic in one of the most interesting ways I have seen portrayed in media.

This might be a bit confusing to hear, though. Normally when we call a relationship toxic, it means that one or both of the people involved are making each other feel bad. But Daisy and Basira seem to make each other feel... good. Basira is apparently Daisy’s last human attachment, and according to Elias in MAG 92, and “not being able to see Basira again” is one of Daisy’s biggest laments in the coffin. And on Basira’s end, Daisy seems to make Basira feel... secure. Supported.

From MAG 117:

BASIRA

But at least Daisy’s coming. I mean, I know she’s… difficult. Everything they say about her, it’s true, it’s fair. But, she’s solid. She’s a… a fixed point, and if she’s there, I know exactly where I stand, exactly what I’m doing, relative to her.

From MAG 178:

MARTIN

We’re here for you.

BASIRA

No. She was there for me.

So, “attachment to humanity” “support” and “security” are good things in a relationship, right? Their love for each other (whether you read it as completely platonic or not) seems genuine, and they put each other first. That should mean that their relationship is Good!

Wellllllll no. Sometimes, a relationship can feel good while also... trapping you in a harmful cycle, or stunting your growth as a person. Think: a friend who is charming and fun who you love to drink with--to the extent that, even when you’re trying to manage an alcohol addiction, you end up going into situations with them that trigger your urge to drink. Also think: a friend who keeps bringing you sugary food even after you’ve been diagnosed with serious diabetes with potential life-altering complications--because you like donuts, they used to make you so happy.

Daisy and Basira are that to each other. In particular--Basira’s attachment to Daisy draws Basira back into dangerous situations and, by extension, causes her fall deep into that “siege mentality” that shuts down Basira’s more thoughtful side.

When Jon confronts Basira about Daisy’s crimes in MAG 178, this exchange occurs.

MARTIN

[Loudly] Enough. Enough! Someone has died! Show some respect. Or don’t you care?

BASIRA

[Incensed] Of course I fucking care!

…

[Quieter] That’s the problem.

MARTIN

I… I don’t understand.

BASIRA

I just… I don’t need him laying everything out for me like I’m some kind of idiot. I know, all right.

I don’t think Basira is making anything up here to make herself seem better. Basira already knew there was a problem with the police, before Jon confronted her. She already knew Daisy was corrupt to some extent, even if she had trouble facing it head on. And--she already cared.

That’s why she quit. She didn’t need a revelation from Jon or anyone else to open her eyes. She didn’t even need to see harm happen to an innocent bystander. Instead, she saw how the higher ups were covering up the killing of Maxwell Raynor, of all people--

BASIRA

They’ve given us a few days ‘compassionate leave’. I think they just want us out of the way while they figure out the official version of what happened.

--and she quit after that.

So, here we already have someone who is coming into an understanding of the police as a flawed system without anyone needing to tell her. Here we have someone who is already extricating herself from that system, because she cares about her impact on other people. From this point, she could easily have gone her own way, taken time to reflect and never hurt anyone again.

So what brings her back into the whole mess in MAG 88?

BASIRA

I’m looking for Daisy.

MARTIN

Oh for – Okay, I don’t know where she is! I don’t know where anybody is! Why does everyone… okay, why does everyone think that I always know where everyone is, all the time?!

BASIRA

Alright, okay, alright, sorry. They just… well, they said at the station that this was the last place she checked in.

--Her relationship with Daisy, of course!

She wants to leave the supernatural and the police behind. She tells Jon the Institute is bad (MAG 73) but she walks back in because she’s worried about Daisy. And then she throws herself right back in the fray to stop Daisy from killing Jon. Shortly after that, Basira has to sign herself off as a hostage to Elias…

ELIAS

She’s quite the killer, your partner. All in the public good, of course. And she was correct, I spent some time acquiring that evidence. Or creating it. And while your superiors don’t much care about the killings, the fact there is proof… They’re not happy. And they want you brought in.

--because of Daisy’s murders, Daisy’s reckless actions giving Elias leverage. Basira throws herself in with Daisy, and it draws Basira right back into a world of violence and the paranormal that she was trying to quit. It motivates her to, once again, cover for Daisy’s errors and justify them. This takes away any chance Basira could have had to gain distance from the violence, reflect, and get some perspective. Instead, she’s thrown right back into the siege.

Basira doesn’t even show any sign of frustration with Daisy at this. It’s not that Basira is 100% meek. We see her get frustrated with people later, express grievances, and hold people accountable later--but with Daisy she doesn’t do any of this. Instead, she immediately re-affirms that she’s on Daisy’s side.

BASIRA

Daisy, it’s… it’s okay. We’ll figure something out.

Of course, it’s not a one-way street, either. It’s not an uncomplicated “Basira good, Daisy toxic and bad” story. It’s a mutually reinforcing cycle where they are both complicit. We see that in season 4, when Daisy tries to stop feeding the hunt.

People like to rag on Basira for her actions in this season but... her actions are actually also more complicated than a simple story of “Basira sabotages Daisy’s progress.” Because Basira misses the more resolute Daisy, yes, and wishes she had a strong protector instead of another person to help... but even with that, she’s still willing to support Daisy’s progress away from the Hunt!

In MAG 133:

ARCHIVIST

You’re not happy she’s back.

BASIRA

I didn’t say that, John. I will never abandon Daisy, and… having her back is… (she sighs) But right now she’s dead weight, and I need to be able to travel light.

Basira wants someone powerful to protect her, is conflicted that she doesn’t have that but still will never abandon Daisy regardless. And, true to her word, she does support what Daisy is doing.

From MAG 140:

BASIRA

We’ve talked about it. If the Hunt takes her again, we don’t know if she’s coming back. And neither of us want that.

In MAG 146, she even praises Daisy’s path of resistance.

BASIRA

You didn’t know what you were doing.

[Daisy makes a pained sound, as if to contradict her, but stops.]

BASIRA

And since you did, you’ve spent every waking hour resisting.

So, Basira is--true to Elias’s word--being Daisy’s anchor to humanity. True to her own word, she’s having Daisy’s back, supporting her decision to quit the hunt even if it means Basira has less back up. So what changes?

MAG 155:

BASIRA

Because I’m not going to lose her.

ARCHIVIST

She goes hunting again, you might anyway.

BASIRA

And if she doesn’t, she might die.

Even at this point, Basira’s worst impulses are always about Daisy. Even when she undercuts Daisy’s progress, it’s about Daisy’s wellbeing. All she wants to do is make sure Daisy’s alive and okay, and to that end she will throw out all of her rationality and moral principles.

And then, when Daisy does finally give into the hunt, it’s for Basira.

It’s... funny to analyze and critique this behavior, because I have seen this sort of behavior in Jon/Martin fics treated as a sweet and romantic thing. You know, the “I want you to keep being a monster because I don’t want to lose you!” thing. And also the “prioritizing each other over everything else in the world” thing. Because the concept of unconditional support, of putting another person first above everything else in the world--it’s an alluring one.

But with Daisy and Basira, even though their relationship isn’t necessarily romantic, we see how harmful that mindset can be. How someone can care for you, prioritize you, make you feel like the whole world, and... the main effect of that is to stunt you, to give you so much comfort you never get out of a harmful cycle or change your behavior at all. How it can cause you to enable horrible things in the world, like police brutality.

That is the story of Daisy and Basira’s relationship. It’s about the effects of this cycle on Basira--yes, Basira specifically and not Daisy, even though the cycle is mutually reinforcing and affects them both.

Basira appears in nearly twice as many episodes as Daisy. Because of this, Basira is the one we see discussing the relationship and what it means to her. Basira is the one we see grappling with the psychological fallout of their relationship. It’s more Basira’s story than Daisy’s--not because she’s the “victim” or that she was morally pure but because... Basira is the one who ultimately grows past this.

After episode after episode of “she needs me” and “I can’t leave her” and “I can’t let her die”--after Basira endangering herself and stunting her own growth by centering Daisy

DAISY

Partner… Come…

[MORE FOOTSTEPS]

BASIRA

Not now. Not after everything.

--Basira finally breaks free, and moves on.

#taiey #basira hussain #daisy tonner #tma #the magnus archives #my post #tma meta

195 notes · View notes

hisclockworkservants · 2 years

Note

I mean i dont think martin treated jon better than georgie in season5 when he was constantly yelling at jon all the time but go off i guess. or just say you hate women and go

I mean I specifcally posted that post to explain and outline my boundaries when it comes to drawing characters, and also to avoid acussaions of character hate. I mean, I didn't even say I "hate" those characters in that post. Guess it didn't really matter :) I mean I don't think I own it to people to explain my very specific and personal reasons of not drawing some characters, but here we go I guess: 1. I already explained in that post my dislike of these characters are not because of their moral standing or the quality of their writing. So this means that I'm not disliking them because they are simply shitty to Jon. If that's the case, then drawing pretty much all the avatar characters would be off the table, since they went way beyond being shitty to Jon. It's not decided by any of those things, but my very specific and personal experience of listening to the podcast, like I explained in the post. Some of those feelings I may be able to explain, but others not so much. Often times, the decision to like or dislike a character is abitrary. 2. Also as you said, Martin not treating Jon better than Georgie in S5 is a personal opinion of yours? I would personally disagree. Martin has a lot more spotlight, so both his faults and good moments with Jon would be highlighted. I actually do think there are things Martin could have done better regarding Jon (likewise for Jon), but ultimately he sticks with Jon. It's not simply doing math of who in which moment wrongs who, but the general experience. 3. If "refusing to drawing female characters" = "hating women", then it stands to reason that the refusal to draw would extend to all female characters, not just these three specifically. In this case, I just don't want to draw them. (And also not Elias/Jonah) 4. Refusing to draw these characters is not devaluing them? I'm just a person drawing bunnies on the Internet. I refuse to take requests of drawing these characters because ultimately, these bunnies are a way for me to relax and have fun in my spare time. So it stands to reason that I want to draw characters I don't struggle with. Even if I push myself to draw things I don't want to draw, the result would be colored by my negative feelings, and I don't think that would be good for me or the ones requesting.

Edit: On a sidenote, I defintely liked and even bookmarked content that features these characters, I’m not actually blindly hating everything they do, I’m just not up for taking requests of them.

I mean I don't think these would convince you since it seems that you've already made up your mind very quickly. Just want to get this out of the way, and I will be deleting future asks like this.

#long post

20 notes · View notes

dathen · 4 years

Photo

INTRODUCING: THE MISSING TAPES BINGO CHALLENGE!

What are the missing tapes?

So much happened after Season 3 and during Season 4 that we didn’t get to see. With us being limited to Jon’s point of view/whatever force is behind the tapes, many events and character interactions take place offscreen. The Missing Tapes is a fan content challenge to visit these moments and explore character feelings from new angles.

How do I participate?

This isn’t an event week or tied down to any specific time. Go for a bingo, or just try a prompt or two! If you write anything for this challenge, use the #missingtapesbingo tag so others can find it easily.

Many thanks to @somuchbetterthanthat, @evanescentjasmine, and @holdthosebees for helping me brainstorm prompts, and @zykaben for the lovely graphic!

After the cut is a text list of the prompts, from top left to lower right. I also included a brief summary for context, and episode references for when these are mentioned or implied.

1. Others’ PoV of Martin losing his mother - (TMA 127) Basira tells Jon that watching how hard this hit Martin kept her from pushing him too hard about his plans. “He tried to stay strong, keep it together, but...that sort of thing...”

2. Basira finding that she’s the sole survivor of the Unknowing - (TMA 122) “The others-- Tim-- Is he…? ...Oh.” “Daisy, too.” “I’m sorry.” “Yeah.”

3. Melanie and Georgie rekindling their friendship post-surgery - (TMA 131, 145) Melanie fell out of contact with Georgie during Jon’s coma, but gets in touch again after escaping the Slaughter. “Who else is there? I mean, Basira is… heh. She’s been the only one for a long time.”

4. Basira and Martin’s phone calls during the Scottish Honeymoon - (TMA 160) Martin and Basira have regular phone calls while he and Jon are in hiding. “How was she?” “Oh, same as last week.”

5. Basira, Daisy, and Jon going for drinks - (TMA 136, 140) “You look awful. You try drinking with Daisy again?”

6. Reactions to the s3 deaths/disappearances - (TMA 122) Tim’s death, Daisy’s body not being found, and Jon as good as dead. Not limited to the Archives team (the rest of the Institute? Jon’s extended family? Oliver’s dreams? go wild).

7. Basira and/or Martin reacting to Peter Lukas vanishing researchers - (TMA 123) “Rumor is a couple of researchers up on the third floor decided to ignore some of his new directives, and… whoosh.”

8. Anti-Lonely sleepovers - (TMA 150) “We’re all well aware that with Peter Lukas in charge of the Institute, [the Lonely] is a very real danger to all of us. We are trying. Daisy, Basira and I, we don’t leave the Institute much anymore, so we do spend a lot of time together.”

9. Melanie and Georgie getting together - (sometime between TMA 145 and 157) “I didn’t-- I didn’t realize you were to-together.”

10. Basira during the S4 finale - (TMA 158-160) Left alone after Daisy draws off the Hunters, waiting for Jon to return with Martin, her PoV of the aftermath, etc.

11. Georgie learns about Jon/starts visiting him in the hospital - (TMA 121) Georgie regularly visits Jon during his coma and talks to him. “Sorry about that, Jon, but you really don’t need friends like that.”

12. Melanie and Basira trauma bonding during Jon’s coma - (TMA 123) “She saved my life, John. She saved all of us. I won’t forget that.”

13. FREE SPACE

14. Melanie picks up a hobby as part of therapy - (after TMA 136) (Implied) Melanie is trying a different approach to life as part of her therapy sessions. “Since when?” “Always. I’m...trying to be more open about this stuff.”

15. Basira or Melanie helping Daisy with physical therapy - (TMA 133) “Hey, there you are. You’re meant to be doing your exercises.” “You were out.”

16. Basira, Melanie, and Martin going out for drinks - (TMA 98, 106) Started in season 3, but could have also happened between the seasons. “Listen, you really look like you could use a drink. Um, me and Basira were just about to pop out. So...do you want to join us?”

17. Daisy and Basira conversations post-coffin - (TMA 132+) “Basira she’s...she’s been good. We’re together, so it’s good...if she didn’t keep treating me like a china doll. But it’s alright.”

18. Daisy learns Melanie’s name; possible fledgling friendship - Daisy didn’t bother learning Melanie’s name pre-Unknowing (TMA 112), but can’t stand being alone post-coffin. "He’s gone with Martin and… the other one.” “Melanie.” “Sure.”

19. Melanie moving in with Georgie - (TMA 157) Takes place sometime between Melanie going to therapy and Melanie recovering from blinding herself.

20. Archive member ambushed by a jealous avatar post-Unknowing - (TMA 123) Stopping the Unknowing drew a lot of hostile attention to the Archives from the followers of other entities. “We made a big noise with the Unknowing and… other stuff and now they’ve taken notice. We’re safe in here, usually. But we don’t go out much anymore.”

21. Jared Hopworth’s attack on the archive - (TMA 123, 131) “When we came up through the floor, it was wonderful. I don’t think I’ll ever forget the look on their faces.”

22. Melanie and Basira’s dynamic post-surgery - (TMA 131) Melanie goes through the same struggle with hating Basira because of the surgery as she does Jon. “I sort of, maybe, hate her now. I don’t know. I can’t look at her without my leg hurting. But what else am I going to do? ... She deals in ‘intel’ these days, in usable data, assets. Not feelings. Not people."

23. The team discovering Martin’s stash of tapes - (TMA 151) “Jon found the tapes you made for him.” “Shh, shh!” “Found a stash of them awhile ago. I made sure he shared with the club.”

24. The Archives team hating on Elias/Peter Lukas together - (Implied) Nothing causes bonding better than a common enemy, right?

25. Post-Flesh attack fallout, hurt/comfort - (TMA 123, 131) “You were attacked. When?” "About two months ago. It was the Flesh." “Oh, god.” “Yeah, it was bad. We took them all out.”

#tma #the magnus archives #tma spoilers #missingtapesbingo

581 notes · View notes

janekfan · 3 years

Text

Chronic

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27802141

Thank you @taylortut for helping me!!!

Jon looked at the clock.

537.

The glowing numbers burned themselves into his retinas. How had it been less than an hour since last he’d checked? No use for it. Better to get himself up and ready for work. But he’d closed his eyes against the headache blaring like a klaxon and he’d have to open them again at some point.

Taking advantage of his lonely flat, Jon allowed himself to indulge the noise pushing its way through grit teeth as he maneuvered his sore legs from under the quilt. He sat a moment, pressing the bare soles of his feet on the cold floor and levering his heavy body upright with a shaking arm.

Exhausted.

And it’s only--a quick glance.

544.

The hell was wrong with him?

Since just before accepting the position as Head Archivist, and rightly pissing off both Sasha and Tim on her behalf, Jon felt like he’d been constantly coming down with something. Dizzy and nauseous and unable to eat, he was chronically exhausted and while he’d never slept well at the best of times, it was evading him more than ever.

And there were his mornings. Struggling to motivate himself out of bed, brushing his teeth with his eyes closed and leaning against the wall. Deciding he could forgo a shower just once more and choosing instead to make breakfast. Forcing himself to eat a piece of dry toast with his heart hammering away in his throat and half laying on the table, panting through his tea. Mentally, Jon prepared himself for the walk to the train, automatically going for his cane because lord knew he needed the support.

He’d get to the Institute hours early.

At least that made him look good?

Taking advantage of being a cane user, Jon opted for a reserved seat, the guilt at truly needing one eating away at his insides. But there were black spots at the corners of his vision and he had to sit down before he fell down and the guilt is a far sight better than causing a scene. The trip was too short. His chest ached from the constant pounding and he pressed the hand not holding his cane for dear life against his breastbone. It didn’t help but the pressure and touch grounded him enough to stand up. To head to the cross street. To wait for the lights to change. To stagger down the stairs and into his office, to drop into his desk chair and focus on every breath of air moving into his body and back out of it.

Jon put his head down. There was no one here. Wouldn’t be for a couple hours yet and he was exhausted, shaking from it. Nauseated. There wasn’t a fever. He’d gone as far as to purchase a thermometer to be certain when the strange symptoms refused to abate no matter how often he let himself rest, no matter the meals he tried his damndest to eat, the water he drank down. He was trying. Jon couldn’t remember ever taking such good care of himself and of course it refused to pay off. In Uni, he’d driven himself into the ground with little consequence. He’d maintained those habits until a few months ago and now--

Muffled voices drifted through his door, the rise and fall of easy conversation. The kind he’d once been allowed to partake in. Laughter filled the air and while Jon wished to join them he knew he wasn’t welcome.

Why had he done it?

Why hadn’t he refused Elias?

Because you’re selfish. You’ve always been selfish. Needy. Greedy, grasping, always striving to know answers and never satisfied with what you're given. You take what you don’t deserve.

Reluctantly, Jon stood, slowly, because doing anything quickly these days has him ducking his head between his legs or waking up on the floor without any recollection of how he came to be there. He could at least collect their research in person, greet them. Try to be the boss they deserved.

Sasha was the boss they deserved.

“Ah, g’good morning.”

“Jon!” Martin, smiling shyly. “You’re here so early!” He began to stammer and Jon’s legs began to ache. This wasn’t a good day. They seldom were anymore. “I m’mean, of course y’you are, you work very hard!” Martin was saved by Tim swinging an arm around his shoulders.

“You’ve broken ‘im, boss.” A flush rose in Jon’s cheeks. He could feel it. “No worries, Marto. He’s always been an early riser.” While it was said in jest, the tone settled heavy in Jon’s chest, directly beside the pain blossoming like a thorny rose. Luckily, he was rescued by Rosie, standing halfway down the stairs and informing him that Elias requested him in his office. Jon didn’t relish the climb, no matter how grateful he was to escape out from underneath Sash’s heavy gaze. She had every right and he would bear his punishment in silence until she chose, if she ever did, to forgive him.

An indeterminate amount of time later, Jon limped out of Elias’ office without any recollection of what they’d spoken about or if he’d even spoken at all. Thumping pain and panic and he knew he was rude to ignore Rosie at her desk but he wasn’t in any shape to hold a conversation, fairly certain that he wasn’t able to currently speak, far too focused on trying to hide how ill he was. But every sound was magnified tenfold in his ears and he could barely remember where the door to the archives was with the way his head reeled and spun. Jon wanted to sink to the ground once he had the door between himself and the lobby but he’d never make it to his feet again after that. Push through, he told himself. Get to your desk. He allowed himself a moment, two, just to put his head to rights, to try and breathe through the battering of his pulse.

And oh god he wasn’t going to make it and he wondered if somehow Elias knew. It was as though he’d kept him standing there talking about nothing until Jon hit his limit, knowing he wouldn’t have the strength to get back to his office.

But he had to try and he’d almost gotten down the ridiculously narrow stairwell before he forgot nearly entirely why he was there in the first place. Was he going up? Down? Meeting with someone? Just arriving? He could barely breathe and the panic welling in his throat was choking and the black was crawling over his eyes and the dizziness only increased and he needed...needed…

For a moment, Jon didn’t recognize where he was, the migraine, the fuzziness, conspiring against memory and reason. But he knew this color, the hideous lick of paint some contractor had splashed over the walls a lifetime ago.

Breakroom?

Wha--

“Jon!” He winced, his own name like broken glass shredding every sense to ribbons. “Christ, are you alright?” Martin, the sounds he made were shrill, grating, and if he’d been able to tell him to be silent, he would have. “We heard the noise--you’d, you fainted! On the stairs! Luckily it was only the last few.” Jon blinked, dull and dumb, forcing himself up, up, up, and through heavy mist and fog in his search for words. Weary to the marrow of his aching bones, Jon slumped on the cushions and tried to think of a way to stop Martin’s incessant chattering. Tim and Sasha, alerted most likely by all the commotion, stood over him and he craned his neck up to look at them. Tim especially looked furious.

“You could have been seriously hurt!”

“S’sorry…” And he was, between his rabbiting heartbeat, throbbing migraine, and difficulty drawing breath into his exhausted lungs, he wanted to cry with how sorry he was.

“This is ridiculous. You need to take better care of yourself.” Jon wasn’t sure why the sting from Tim’s accusation cut so deep and he hung his head, biting trembling lips to prevent the tears threatening to spring free.

It wasn’t fair.

By all accounts he was taking care of himself. More than ever!

“Did you even eat today? Drink anything?” He nodded, miserable, unwell, and equipped with no better answers than the truth.

“Tim. He’s just come to.” The understanding was the final straw, and Jon’s sight blurred with salt damp. “I’ll make sure he eats something before going back to work.”

“Alright, Martin. If he gives you any trouble, call.” At Jon, he pointed. “And you, no trouble.” And he nodded miserably.

“Okay, they’ve gone.” The familiar sounds of the kettle heating filled the room, the clink of a pair of ceramic mugs, the rustling of the tea bags, Martin’s distracted murmuring, all combined to calm him. “How long have you been feeling this way?” Jon looked up, surprised, and shrugged one shoulder, accepting the small plate of biscuits and nibbling slowly and when he finished those, Martin offered up the tea. Sitting with him in companionable quiet, he sipped on his own cup. Nothing more was exchanged and when Jon finished he thanked Martin for the company and locked himself away.

Jon was at wit’s end. Nothing he tried seemed to improve anything and the few times he did speak with a doctor, he was sent away with the same, useless advice, or worse, told he was imagining things, making it up, having panic attacks even though he was familiar with those and this was not that.

Work was a nightmare made even more miserable with the overwhelming amount of paperwork, statements, boxes, misfiled folders and envelopes and items and Jon missed the easy camaraderie and understanding he’d had with Sasha and Tim. Maybe he should resign, try and salvage what little of the relationship they still had, or, or invite them out for dinner, his treat, but Elias would never let him quit and the very idea of entertaining exhausted him. A cuppa appeared at his elbow filled with something new, something floral and slightly sweet, accompanied, as always, by a few biscuits.

“That’s a lot of work, Jon.” He sipped, grateful, lifting an eyebrow in response.

“I knew it would be when I accepted this position.” Undeterred, Martin stumbled forward.

“Y’yeah, I mean, you would have. Of course. I just--” A breath. “I’ve finished with my other assignments, ready for round, uh. Well, another round!”

“Ah. Alright, I’ll bring something over when I pick up your translations.” Martin took back the cup, nodding enthusiastically, and Jon appreciated that it was business as usual, selecting a few he’d been putting off and making his way toward his assistants ignoring inquiring looks in favor of taking the chair Martin offered up to go over his expectations. Short, succinct. A few notes on one translation, advice to remember for next time, and Jon felt reasonably confident Martin could handle himself. It wasn’t until he’d gotten back to his office that Jon realized that was the first time he’d been offered a chair. It was becoming apparent that Martin was good at noticing the little things about them. A blush heated his cheeks and he tried to rub it away, feeling ridiculous that such a small act of kindness made him feel so seen.

Jon pushed forward, ignoring the warnings his body was trying to give him in favor of plowing through his work like he’d always done, and by the time he made it home, was on the verge of collapse. Hot tears of frustration stung at the corners of his eyes, spilling over when Jon allowed himself to feel it. More than anything, he was used to having control over himself, working when he wanted, burying himself in the research, devouring knowledge. Now he was at the whim of his physical form. Paying more attention to it than ever before and never knowing if he was going to wake up and have a good day or a bad day and it was maddening. Managing whatever it was without knowing what it was, was impossible with no rhyme or reason he could discern.

So in the absence of both, Jon kept shoving his way through how difficult it was because if he could just be normal through pretending everything was normal, then it would be.

Jon knew Tim was cross with him and managed to avoid him for most of the day, taking breaks here and there like he’d promised Martin he would do. But his luck, while it had been holding steady, had just run out and he found himself cornered in the breakroom.

“What do you think you’re on about?” Frustration had long since turned to outrage, boiling over.

“Tim, I. I’m not sure what you mean--”

“Damn it, Jon! You’ve already taken on a job you aren’t fit for! You can’t keep heaping your work onto Martin and then swanning off!”

“That’s.” He balled his hands into fists, nails biting crescent moons into his palms. How could he explain when even the doctors thought he was making it all up? Heat rushed through him, top to toe, flushing his face and he wavered, legs threatening to buckle, vision threatening to go dark. He was going to pass out a second time today if he didn’t sit down. But that would mean walking away from Tim, and he didn’t think the man would let him. At least not until he was done telling him off. Better to be silent. Try not to pay attention to how erratic the persistent beating caged behind fragile ribs had become.

“Why didn’t you say no?” Because he wanted to be useful. Because Elias made him feel like he was capable even if he wasn’t. “Why didn’t you just let Sasha have this?” Because he was an awful, selfish person. “God, Jon. Why did you drag us all down here with you?”

Because he was lonely.

Because they’d been friends. Once.

Rather than remind Tim that he was free to go at any time, that he and Sash hadn’t been forced or coerced into accepting positions here in the archives, Jon pressed his lips into a thin line.

“Well?!” Sharp, strident, Tim’s shout echoed around in the space between his own hurting, agonal breaths in his ears.

“I. I, I need to si’down…” wanted to lay down. Wanted to sleep, trembling with exhaustion, about to go down.

“What?” Lashes fluttering as he gripped the thread of consciousness with both hands, he barely registered Tim’s hands around his shoulders, guiding him into a chair and pushing his head down between his knees. “Jon?”

“M’okay…”

“You are clearly not.” A wide palm settled on his back, keeping him folded over. It was helping.

“S’mm...been. S’fine.” The floor came back into focus, all the little cracks and imperfections and Jon counted the streaks in the pattern in an attempt to ground himself but kept losing track of the number. Neither moved until Jon attempted to sit up, slowly, accepting Tim’s help.

“Jon?” He looked spooked, pale. “Please, what’s going on?” His hand settled in the crux of shoulder and neck, thumb ghosting along his clammy skin, and Jon allowed himself to find a morsel of comfort in the familiar gesture, the threat of tears closer than ever. So he reached for him.

“I don’t know.” And Tim pulled away as if burned, the frustration and anger rising in his face again, and Jon was bereft. “T’truly! I--”

“Why won’t you be honest with me? Don’t you trust me?” Standing, he took a step backwards, away from him, the hurt in him a palpable thing. “We’re supposed to be friends!”

Yes. They were friends. It was most likely why for the first time in a long while, the pain in his chest wasn’t a physical ache.

“Tim, I.” Fingers folded to fists to rest on his knees. But he was already gone.

“Jon!” Tentative, Martin lifted his chin. “Oh, oh.” Having been crying, Jon figured his eyes were red-rimmed and puffy and he didn’t bother attempting to hide the evidence. “Alright.” Martin went about making tea, chamomile, herbal and calming, placing it before him on the table with a chocolate digestive. “Drink this down and then go home. It’s half six.”

“Mm.”

“Sleep will help.”

“Mm.”

“I could speak to them for you. If--”

“No!” All but shouted. “No. That won’t be necessary, Martin.” Carefully he stood, paused. “Thank you.” And left.

Jon called off.

Called off again.

Again.

Apologized to Elias in a curt email requesting leave and was granted it.

He ignored his phone. His texts. The knock at the door and Martin’s voice behind it. He slept when he was tired and he was tired often and it was easier besides, to finally listen to the screaming of his body. It was after hours on his fifth day gone when Tim let himself in with the spare key to Jon’s flat.

“Hey.” Sheepish, he held up his hands in surrender, a bag of takeaway from Jon’s favorite place dangling from one. “Martin said you wouldn’t let him in.” Dressed in the most comfortable clothes he had, which were also the shabbiest, Jon glared at him from where he laid on the couch. “I was an arse.” Slowly, he sat up, making Tim wait on purpose, a powerful frown still aimed in his direction.

“You were.” He was aware he looked a mess, greasy hair pulled back in a sloppy bun, but he felt a sight better for the rest he’d gotten.

“Would you accept an apology?” Folding his arms, Jon leaned back into the cushions and fixed his stare at whatever rubbish was on the telly.

“Might do.” Silently, Tim scurried into the tiny kitchen and Jon listened to the familiar sounds of him rooting around for cutlery. It smelled delicious and comforting, a reminder of nights spent together laughing at nothing on this same couch and despite himself, Jon began to relax.

“I’m sorry.”

“Alright.” Tim’s face split in a wide, relieved grin, and he flopped down next to him, planting a loud kiss to his temple before urging him to eat. “Martin sent you here.”

“An angry Marto is not to be trifled with.” Through a mouthful of noodles, Tim chuffed in laughter. “Wouldn’t tell me anything, other than to stop being a prick.”

“He did not.”

“He did not. But it was more than implied!” He put his bowl on the low table in front of them, sitting forward with his hands dangling between his knees. “And he was right. I didn’t give you a fair shake and accused you of awful things. And I know you’re doing your best at this job.”

“Gertrude isn’t making it easy.”

“Neither is your health, I take it.” Jon set his own meal aside, curling into the padded arm.

“No. It isn’t.”

“And you don’t know what’s causing it?”

“I know some things that help. M’Martin has been invaluable.”

“Has he, now?”

“Leave off!”

“Okay, okay.” But he continued giggling as Jon felt his face go hot, muttering.

“He really has.” This time Tim pulled him gently into an embrace.

“Then Sash and I will just have to catch up.”

#tma #the magnus archives #jon sims #tim stoker #martin blackwood #sasha james #cane user jon sims #archivist with a cane #chronic illness #undiagnosed #pots #fainting #exhaustion #anxiety #hurt/comfort #internalized ableism

87 notes · View notes

aflyingcontradiction · 3 years

Text

The Magnus Archives Relisten: Episode 101 - Another Twist

Nikola: Now could you two please move that thing somewhere far, far away?

Ooh, so Nikola is terrified of the Buried then? Or at least made very uncomfortable by it drawing attention to itself (no, I absolutely didn't catch on my first listen that the humming in the background is the 'singing' of the coffin in the rain, wouldn't have realised this time either if I weren't also reading the transcript at the same time).

Nikola: Oh, of course! So, Elias, can I call you Elias?

1st listen: "Heh, it's funny, the self-declared monster is making attempts at being polite, sort of, asking if Elias is okay with being on 'first name terms' as if he was currently in a position to reply let alone reply in the negative." 2nd listen: "SHE KNOWS! OH GOD DOES SHE EVER KNOW!"

Michael: I’ve come to a decision, Archivist. I’m going to kill you. Jon: - grunts in obvious annoyance -

I love how Jon doesn't even panic anymore, his reaction is clearly just an 'Oh great, another one! GET IN LINE!'

Michael: I am Michael. I was not always Michael. I do not want to be Michael. Being Michael stole the only purpose I have ever known.

Damn, talk about a major identity crisis, I feel genuinely bad for the Distortion, I too hate the feeling of having interiorities I did not pick and do not enjoy thrust upon me!

Michael: The Michael on that tape was not me. When that person was Michael, I was something else, and now I am Michael, and that person is gone. Jon: So, what… You… you became him? Michael: No more than he became me. It is rare that someone I take finds their way into being me, but it does happen. And Michael had help.

I really enjoy the muddled non-explanation of what the everloving fuck Distortion!Michael actually is. It says everything and clarifies nothing and it is BEAUTIFUL.

Michael: Michael Shelley, though, he is easier to keep track of. He was born. He was pointless. And he should have died.

Harsh, dude!

Michael: When he was in school, he lost a friend to something like me. His friend was named Ryan, but those in power simply called him schizophrenic.

You could refer the 'but those in power simply called him schizophrenic' to 'he lost a friend to something like me', taking the thing about his name as a simple side thought (so basically 'they thought he was schizophrenic but there was much more to it because actually he was also tormented by the Spiral') but the way it's actually phrased here is much, much darker because it's 'His name was Ryan but they called him schizophrenic' - it sounds like he lost his entire identity because of the way people treat those with diagnoses like schizophrenia.

Michael: Even being what I am, I have rarely seen anyone so adept at distorting the truth as Gertrude Robinson. Michael was protective of the frail old woman he believed her to be. So… so delicate, so forgetful, yet gently wise. He cared for her. He trusted her. And she fed him to me. She made him me to destroy our transcendence. And she did not hesitate.

I get the feeling that Michael, being currently an inseparable mixture of Michael Shelley and the Distortion, is actually bitter about this from TWO perspective (and has every fucking right to be, for what it's worth!)

Michael: And do you know what he worried about? - giggles - He… worried about Gertrude Robinson.

That giggle has the distinct sound of oncoming hysteria, even more so than Distortion!Michael's standard laugh.

Michael: He asked her where they were going and was told again: Zemlya Sannikova. Sannikov Land.

This is apparently based on a pre-existing myth, just looked it up on Wikipedia because I was wondering how they had come up with that name.

Jon: Why is it locked? Michael: It can’t be! Jon: Well, you try it!

I love how the exasperated 'Well you try it' in a tone of '... if you're so intent on being bloody right all the time' is absolutely the way you would have that conversation with ... someone you know, a family member or perhaps a friend who is just getting on your nerves today. I'm pretty sure I've seen my parents have this exact conversation at some point. The actual context makes that pretty funny.

Michael: Th-Tha-That-That’s… not – Oh. Oh no. - AGONISED SCREAMING -

That little 'Oh. Oh no.' of realisation gave me shivers. Also that scream is fucking horrifying!

Helen: He got… distracted. Let feelings that shouldn’t have been his overwhelm me. Lost my way.

a) I love the phrasing of this and b) yeah, he sure did, there was a whole lot of anger toward Gertrude there that really wasn't coming from the Distortion side of that equation!

Jon: How long have I… b-been here? There’s no… It was hard to keep track –

On my first listen I absolutely didn't get that this was a hint that actually, somewhere in the silence between one click and another, WEEKS had passed.

My impression of this episode

Well, this episode DOES feature not one, but TWO of my favourite creepy fucks, how could I not like it? And we get tragic backstory for one of them, so that's especially delicious and - well - tragic, I'll absolutely admit that Michael's story makes me emotional, the primary emotion being not so much sadness, though there's also a bit of that, but anger. It's also the confirmation of those earlier hints regarding Gertrude's ruthless character. And then there's the Helenification of the Distortion, which is executed perfectly. There's just a LOT here and every last bit of it fascinating.

Favourite quotes

Michael: Even sharper than the joy of becoming is the agony of being opened and remade. To have your who torn bloody from your what, and another crudely lashed into its place.

#tma relisten #the magnus archives

6 notes · View notes

sleepymarmot · 3 years

Text

I think Martin’s stance in the argument in MAG 194 was consistent with the opinions he’d voiced before.

Long post with a lot of quotes under the cut.

Martin’s Mindset

1) Killing avatars is good even if they seem nice (the line Martin draws is at killing a child):

172: [Jon: I don’t think he’s evil.] Oh, yeah, sure; he’s probably a really kind, benevolent ruler of a hellish fear prison.

173: Wh, What about the Avatar? I know you said it didn’t change anything, th-the domain would still exist, but at this point I don’t care, alright? Anyone who’s chosen to spend their apocalypse tormenting children – God, you need to end them. Now.

174: Why not [kill Simon]? Because he was nice to you? Because he was charming, because he was fun?

174: You’re removing evil from the world.

2) Making new avatars is not good:

184: [Jordan: What is this?] [Thin-lipped] Yeah, I’m curious about that myself.

184: [Jordan: Why?] Good question. Jon? Care to enlighten us?

184: [Jon: Didn’t want to just watch you suffer.] It’s what you’ve been doing for everyone else. It’s what you’re expecting him to do.

3) Being at peace with one’s existence as an avatar is bad:

185: Would he enjoy it? (...) Leave him.

186: But I can’t keep existing like this at their expense. It’s not… it’s not right. Whatever happens with Elias, W-with the rest of the world… I can’t live on the misery of others.

186: I get it, okay? I can’t decide what happens to them. But… I just might be able to decide what happens to me. And… And if it comes down to it…I’ll get John to destroy me like the others.

4) Being the one to decide who benefits and who suffers is a terrible responsibility:

185: [Jon: I’m sorry I put you in that position.] No, you were right to. That’s… that’s a lot of power to have to deal with. Lot of responsibility.

“And what? Replace them with new avatars from the people who don’t want to?”

Martin was very enthusiastic about killing avatars, yes. But the reverse? Not really. Both times the idea of turning the Watched into Watchers came up, it was Jon’s initiative. 184 is self-evident, but even in 185, where Martin is the one to make the decision, it’s Jon who asks him:

Inspector: You’ve got to help me! Jon: Martin? What do you think? Martin: What? Jon: I decided about Jordan. This place is from your past.

“I saw the kick you got out of making them scream for once”

I think this part of the argument caught many of us off guard. We all remember how much Martin pushed Jon towards killing avatars despite Jon’s discomfort, ethical dubiousness and practical pointlessness of that endeavour. But Martin isn’t simply projecting his own feelings onto Jon -- he did enjoy that too, this did not come out of nowhere this week:

166:

Helen: Oh, hello! In a better mood, are we? Feeling more secure now you’ve learned how to kill? Jon: Something like that.

Martin: I don’t see why you were being so coy about it – Jon: Because I’m ashamed, Martin. Martin: Ashamed?! Jon: Yes! Ashamed of the fact that I just – destroyed the world and have been rewarded for it, the fact that – I can walk safe through all this horror I’ve created like a… fucking tourist, destroying whoever I please. The fact that I… enjoyed it, and… the fact that there are so many others that I want to revenge myself on!

169:

Martin: John, is there another way? Jon: I mean – sort of? Maybe? Martin: That turn. You – You took a hard turn after the roots back there; I knew that was a thing! Why are we here? Jon: It’s just – when you said – Martin: Jon, why have you taken us here? Jon: Jude Perry. This is where Jude Perry rules. Martin: That’s the one who burned your hand, isn’t it? Jon: Yes.

Jon: I want revenge on Jude Perry. I want to… smite her. Make her feel what – What all her victims felt.

Jon: I’m here for you, Jude. To end you. Jude: (...) You’re bluffing. Jon: You know I’m not. You’re already afraid. Jude: Oh, I see. I get it. You finally get a sniff of power, and the first thing you do is try to settle some old scores. Play the big man; get off on good old-fashioned petty revenge. Jon: I’d have thought that was a mindset you would appreciate. Now, feel it. All the terror and pain you’ve inflicted. Jude: Oh, piss off – Look, look. Wait. Right? I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have burned your hand. Jon: No. You shouldn’t have.

171:

Martin: Why didn’t we go after the landlord guy? In the tenement. (...) Jon: It didn’t seem worth it. I didn’t – hate him like I hated her. He never hurt me.

174:

Jon: I just – This whole… avenging angel thing, I, I’m not – It doesn’t feel right. Martin: It seemed to feel right when we were avenging all the wrongs done against you. Jon: I know. I, I, I know, alright? But well – That’s kind of the problem; I, I have all this – power, and, and I want to use it to try to help, but I – I don’t know – I mean, I do. I-I’ve done so much damage, and – and anything that might help to balance that is – But killing other Avatars is, is not – I, I don’t think it makes anything better. I think it just makes me worse.

“You weren’t meant to enjoy [Kill Bill] this much!”

Initially, Martin enthusiastically suggested killing avatars because he thought it would improve the world:

166:

Martin: Th, This isn’t like it was before! We’re not talking about innocent bystanders in cafes here, Jon; these things are – th-they’re just evil, plain and simple, and right now they’re torturing and tormenting everyone! If you want to stop them and have the power to, then – then, then yeah, let’s do it, let’s go full Kill Bill!

169:

Martin: It’s not just your revenge though, is it? Destroying her… it would help all those people in there, wouldn’t it? Jon: Maybe? It’s… Like I said, I can’t see the future. It wouldn’t free them, if that’s what you’re asking. ‘Free’ doesn’t really exist in this place.

Jon: She’s gone. Martin: The fires are still here. Doesn’t look like much has changed. Jon: No. I suppose not. Martin: Let’s just get out of here.

171:

Martin: Why didn’t we go after the landlord guy? In the tenement. Jon: Arthur Nolan? Martin: Yeah. He’s still there, right? Jon: After Jude, th,the fires – I,I didn’t want to put you through anymore. Martin: Don’t do that. Jon: What? Martin: Don’t use me as an excuse. Jon: I-I’m not. I just – It didn’t seem worth it. I didn’t – hate him like I hated her. He never hurt me. Martin: But all the people inside. Jon: Killing Nolan wouldn’t have made it stop. It would just leave it – unsupervised. Martin: John – we are doing good, right? Making things better? Jon: I don’t know if that was ever an option.

173:

Martin: We’ve got to help them. Jon: How? Martin: I – I don’t know! I’m not the one who’s supposed to know everything, alright? There has to be something we can do!

Martin: Wh, What about the Avatar? I know you said it didn’t change anything, th-the domain would still exist, but at this point I don’t care, alright? Anyone who’s chosen to spend their apocalypse tormenting children – God, you need to end them. Now.

Jon: You see? Martin: See what, John; what am I supposed to see? That you don’t want to kill a – thirteen year old kid? Big revelation. Jon: I don’t know what you want me to do. Martin: I want you to use your power. I want you to help them; I want you to make things better! Jon: There is no better anymore. Martin: You keep – saying that, and I hate it! Jon: I keep saying it because it keeps being true; you know that! Martin: What I know, is that leaving children here is – (struggles for words) i-it’s inexcusable; it’s monstrous! Jon: Martin. Tell me what you want me to do, and I will do it!

Martin: Let’s get out of here. Jon: If you’re sure. Martin: The sooner we get back to the Archives, the sooner we can put a stop to this. All of this. They just – They’ll just need to hang on a little longer.

174:

Martin: You’re removing evil from the world. Jon: I, I’m not though, am I? The tenement fire is still burning. The mortal garden is growing wild. The carousel –

Hypocrisy?

As we see in the quotes above, both Jon and Martin were swept up by the feeling of newfound power and the idea of revenge. For Jon, pessimistic about the state of the world and personally hurt by some of the avatars they encountered on the road, it was mostly about personal vengeance. Martin, on the other hand, doesn’t have such a painful history with the avatars whose domains they pass, and the lack of Beholding-sourced knowledge and despair allows him to hold onto a false hope, making this an ideologically driven crusade.

With this in mind, let’s go back to 194:

Martin: I know what it’s like to be powerless. A-And I know you do too. And I also know what it’s like when you get a taste of– wh-when you’re finally able to–

Jon: What happened to “Kill Bill”? Martin: You weren’t meant to enjoy it this much!

These lines sound a lot like regret. Maybe I’m overestimating Martin’s level of self-awareness here, but it seems he has realized they both got drunk on power, and he pushed Jon in a direction he shouldn’t have. Unfortunately, in the heat of the moment he puts all blame on Jon instead of taking responsibility for his own actions. Let’s hope that he apologizes later!

To be entirely clear, I think that the way Martin consistently treats Jon like a gun instead of a person in this subplot is in itself a problem. When Jon is ashamed of enjoying vengeance too much, Martin doesn’t like it; when he lets himself enjoy it, Martin disapproves too as we now know. Let’s look at three crucial points in the storyline side by side:

166:

Martin: Sure. Okay, that’s – I mean, that’s really not that complicated, John; I don’t see why you were being so coy about it – Jon: Because I’m ashamed, Martin. Martin: Ashamed?! Jon: Yes! Ashamed of the fact that I just – destroyed the world and have been rewarded for it, the fact that – I can walk safe through all this horror I’ve created like a… fucking tourist, destroying whoever I please. The fact that I… enjoyed it, and… the fact that there are so many others that I want to revenge myself on! Martin: …No; No, I actually think you’re good on that front. Jon: What? Martin: Yeah, I, I, I think we should go for it, get our murder on! Jon: Sorry, what? Helen: Yes, Martin! Martin: Th, This isn’t like it was before! We’re not talking about innocent bystanders in cafes here, Jon; these things are – th-they’re just evil, plain and simple, and right now they’re torturing and tormenting everyone! If you want to stop them and have the power to, then – then, then yeah, let’s do it, let’s go full Kill Bill!

174 (I left in some of the unofficial transcript’s stage directions to keep the picture clear):

Martin:That’s enough. John? Jon: Uh… yes? Martin: Do it. Simon: Uhh… Do what? Martin: Kill him. Jon: Uh – Simon: Hang on. Can he do that? Martin: (forceful) He can, and he’s going to! Simon: Oh! Right! Seems a bit rude, to be honest. Jon: Oh, oh… okay, um. Martin: Jon? Jon: J-Just give me a moment! I, uh, I – Simon: I-In fact, yes! You know what? I’ll, I’ll probably just be going, then – I, I – I’d prefer to keep existing, if it’s all the same to you, uhm – Martin: J-Jon! Jon: I – Simon: (fast) Been lovely chatting to you! Good to see you guys. Feel free to pop by again when you’re feeling less, um, murdery. Martin: (yelling) Jon! Simon: Byeee! Martin: You let him go. Jon: (weary) Yeah. Martin: Why? Jon: Because, uh… uh – Martin: (cutting him off) Why did you let him go, John?

194:

Martin: I know what it’s like to be powerless. A-And I know you do too. And I also know what it’s like when you get a taste of– wh-when you’re finally able to– Jon: That’s not what this is! Martin: I’ve been out there with you. I saw the kick you got out of making them scream for once. Jon: What happened to “Kill Bill”? Martin: You weren’t meant to enjoy it this much!

Looks like Martin assumed Jon’s desire for vengeance to be righteous anger. And didn’t like the realization that Jon’s murderous urges -- or his own, in Oliver and Simon’s cases -- are something darker, more personal and irrational.

Conclusion

When Martin had pressured Jon to act, it was done out of hope and idealism (misguided or not, we’ll see). He didn’t simply want Jon to do something -- he wanted him to make the world better. Call it naive, wilfully blind, unfair to Jon -- I’ve had my own share of frustration with Martin this season -- but he has had a very specific and consistent agenda. Sometimes both Jon and Martin are motivated by a personal grudge -- Jon against Not!Them and Jude and Jared, Martin against Oliver and Simon -- but overall, Martin thinks that this quest removes evil from the world.

What Jon proposes in 194 goes against all of Martin’s beliefs and wishes:

The total amount of evil is not reduced

New avatars are created

Jon appoints himself the one and only ultimate judge

By giving in to the Eye:

Jon lets it have what it had wanted all along, lets it win

Jon abandons morality for power

Jon abandons humanity and Martin for the inhuman evil happiness he can’t help but crave

Accepting this is at least as bad as doing nothing at all -- and perhaps even worse.

So I don’t think Martin’s being particularly irrational during the argument. Some of the things he says may be unfair, harsh, even cruel. You can say it was hypocritical of him to accuse Jon of enjoying the killing spree too much, since he was the one who proposed it and kept pushing Jon towards it with great enthusiasm. His “I forbid it” may be naive and childishly petulant, and this mindset might lead him to making bad choices in the future. But I don’t think he was projecting his own feelings onto Jon, or pulling arguments out of nowhere.

#the magnus archives #tma spoilers #mag 194 #martin blackwood #blah blah blah #finished the post right by the time everyone has already moved on. typical

18 notes · View notes

alicenttully · 4 years

Note

It’s so hypocritical to act like ppl don’t like Sansan because he’s ugly when every art they draw has him looking handsome and they literally self insert into Sansa because they want to be with him. I’d love it if Sansa ended up with Jeyne, who’s probably losing her nose, or someone else age appropriate that’s not gorgeous. Hoster Blackwood is a fun weird option, he seems sweet and smart. We want Sansa with someone that’ll treat her well and isn’t a grown adult.

Exactly!!! A good majority of Sansan shippers are grown women who are attracted to the Hound because they see him as some dangerous broken bad boy which OK whatever floats your boat but why not ship him with actual grown women in the series/OC instead of self inserting a 12 yo old?

And yeah like you I want Sansa with someone her age or close to. I could care less about their looks. I dont want some one abusive. Is that so fucking hard to grasp? I guess this is why I see a lot of Sansa stans be mutuals with Elia stans. Mainly because we think they deserves/deserved better.

Finally about Jeyne I really really hope that nothing happens to her nose because I know the most vile Arya stans will see it as penance for daring to call their precious fave "Horseface" (which was mean, I fully adknowledge. I dont like for one moment that Jeyne did that) because I've seen them say as such, including one lovely individual who either made the comment or laughed at a comment at a really abhorrent theory about Jon & Jeyne which I'm not going to mention here.

#sansa stark #anti sansan #anti arya stans #jeyne poole #sansa #asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #got #asks

72 notes · View notes

cardentist · 3 years

Text

this isn’t a proper discourse post, I Agree with a lot of what the op said but there’s specific things about it that get under my skin in a way that makes me want to talk about it, but I don’t want to engage with that post both because I don’t want to speak over the point that’s being made and frankly because I don’t want to be misinterpreted because of the point that’s being made in it.

so for context, I’ll just say that it was a long post about how a lack of engagement with women characters in fandom spaces is tied to misogyny. just be aware that I’m responding to something specific and not criticisms of this in general. (feel free to dm me if you want to see the post for yourself)

the rest of this is going to be rambly and a bit unfocused, so I want to get this out the door right at the top: it is not actually someone’s moral obligation to engage with or create fan content. all other points aside, what this amounts to is labeling people as bigoted for either not creating or engaging with content that you want to see, and while the individual may or may not be a bigot it’s not actually anyone’s job to tailor their fandom experience to cater to you.

fandom is not activism. it’s not Wrong to point out that a lack of content about women in fandom is likely indicative of the influence of our misogynistic society. and suggesting that people examine their internalized biases isn’t just fine, it’s something that everyone should be doing all the time. but saying that it is literally someone’s “responsibility” to “make an effort” by consuming content about women or they’re bigoted is presenting the consumption of fan content as a moral litmus test that you pass and fail not by how you engage with content but by not engaging with all of the Correct content.

judging people’s morality based on what characters they read meta for or look at fanart for is, a mistake. it Can Be Indicative of internalized biases but it is not, in and of itself, a moral failing that has to be corrected.

if you want more content to be created about women in fandom then you do it by spreading content about women in fandom, not by guilting people into engaging with it by saying that they’re bigots if they don’t. you encourage creation Through creation.

okay, now to address what Mainly set me off to inspire this post.

this post specifically went out of it’s way to present misogyny as the only answer for why this problem exists in fandom spaces. and while I absolutely agree that it’s a Factor, they left absolutely no room for nuance which included debunking “common excuses.” which, as you can probably guess, contained the things that ticked me off.

first off, you can’t judge that someone is disconnected from women in general based on their fandom consumption because the sum total of their being is not available on tumblr.

people don’t always bear their souls in fandom spaces. just because they don’t actively post about a character or Characters doesn’t mean that they see them as lesser or that they don’t think about them. the idea that you can tell what a person’s moral beliefs are not based on what they’ve said or done but based on whether they engage with specific characters in a specific way in a specific space can Only work on the assumption that they engage with that space in a way that expresses the entirety of who they are or even their engagement with that specific media.

what I engage with on ao3 is different from what I engage with on tumblr, youtube, twitter, my friend’s dms, and my own head. people are going to engage with social media and fandom spaces specifically differently for different reasons. you can’t assume what the other parts of their lives look like based on this alone.

second off, there can be other factors at play that influence people’s specific engagement with a fandom.

they specifically brought up the magnus archives as an example of a show with well written women. which while absolutely true, does Not mean that misogyny is the only option for why people wouldn’t engage with content about them as often. for me personally? a lot of fan content is soured because of how it presents jon. I relate to him very heavily as a neurodivergent and traumatized person, and he faces a Lot of victim blaming and dehumanization in the writing. sasha and martin are more or less the only main characters that Aren’t guilty of this, and sasha was out of the picture after season 1.

while this affects my enjoyment of fan content for these characters To Some Extent on it’s own (I love georgie, I love her a lot, but I can’t forget that she looked at someone and told them that they were better off dead because they couldn’t “choose” to not be abused), the bigger issue is fan content that Specifically doesn’t address the victim blaming and ableism as what it is, even presenting it as just Correct.

this isn’t exclusive to the women in the show by any means, this is exactly why I avoid a lot of content about tim, but it affects a lot of the women who are main characters. that isn’t the Only reason, there’s more casual ableism and things that tear him down for other reasons (the prevalent theory that elias passed up on sasha because he’s afraid of how she’s More Competent In Jon In Every Single way. which comes with the unfortunate implications of jon being responsible for his own trauma because he just wasn’t competent enough to avoid it) but that’s the main one that squicks me out.

of course not all fan content does this, and I Do engage with content about these characters, but sometimes it’s easier to just stick with content that centers on my comfort character because it’s more likely to look at his character with the nuance required to see that it is victim blaming and ableism.

it’s not enough to say that the characters are well rounded or well written and conclude that if someone isn’t consuming or creating content about them then it has to be due to misogyny and nothing else.

there’s also just like, the Obvious answer. two most prominent characters are two men that are in a canonical gay relationship, which draws in queer men/masc people on it’s own but the centering of their othering and trauma Particularly draws in traumatized queer people that are starved for content. georgie and melanie are both fleshed out characters in and of themselves, but their relationship with each other doesn’t have nearly as much direct screen time. and daisy and basira have a lot more screen time together and about each other, but their relationship is very intentionally non-canon because of its role as a commentary on cop pack mentality.

people are More Likely to create content for the more prominent relationship in the show and be drawn into the fandom through that relationship in the first place. I have no doubt that there Are misogynistic fans of the show, but focusing on the relationship and the characters that make you happy isn’t and indication that you’re one of them.

which brings us to the big one, the one that sparked me into writing this in the first place (and the last that I have time for if I’m being honest). the “common excuses” section in general is, extremely dismissive obviously but there’s only one section that genuinely upsets me.

without copying and pasting what they said directly, it essentially boils down to this: while they recognize that gay and trans men are “allowed” to relate to men, they’re still Men which makes them misogynistic. Rather than acknowledge Why gay and trans men would engage with fan-content specifically that caters to them they present it as a given that it’s 100% due to misogyny anyways. they present queer men engaging with content about themselves as them treating women like they’re “unworthy of attention,” calling it a “patriarchal tendency” that they have to unlearn.

being gay and trans does not mean that you’re immune to misogyny, being a woman doesn’t even mean that you’re immune to misogyny, but that’s engaging in bad faith in a way that really puts a bad taste in my mouth.

queer men aren’t just like, Special Men that have Extra Bonus Reasons to be relate to boys, they’re people who are more likely to Need fandom spaces to explore facets of themselves. and while you can Relate to any character, it feels good to be able to explore those aspect with characters that resemble you or how you see yourself.

when I first started actively seeking out fandom spaces in middle school I engaged with content about queer men more or less exclusively. at this point I had no concept of what trans people were, and wouldn’t begin openly considering that I might be a trans person until high school. I knew that I’d be happier as a gay man before I knew I could be a gay man, and that’s affected my relationship with fandom forever.

I engage with most things pretty casually, reblogging meta and joke posts when I see them, but what I go out of my way to engage with is largely an expression of my gender identity and sexuality. I project myself onto a comfort character and then I Consume content for them because that was how I was able to express myself before I knew that I needed to. it’s not that girl characters aren’t “worthy” of me relating to them, it’s that I specifically go to certain fandom spaces to express and work through my gender and sexuality. that’s what I use those fandom spaces For.

I imagine that I’ll need this crutch less when I’m allowed to transition and if I ever find a relationship situation that works out for me. but also like, why should I? it’s not actually hurting anyone for me to explore my gender and sexuality through fanfic until the end of time. nor does it hurt anyone for me to focus on my comfort characters.

fandom is personal comfort and entertainment, not a moral obligation. people absolutely should engage with women in media and real life with more nuance and energy than they do, but fandom spaces are not the place to police or judge that.

#discourse #I've been writing and rewriting this for 4 and a half hours instead of going to bed before 9 am #I already know that absolutely no one is going to read this so I don't know why I did this to myself #also I couldn't find a place to fit this in so I'm just gonna say it here #sometimes people just engage with fandom based on characters that they find attractive #and if that means boys then that means boys #it doesn't have to be more complicated than that

26 notes · View notes

marlonhart · 3 years

Text

Happy, golden days! The first foretaste of life was mysterious and alluring, and it was so sweet to get glimpses of it.

From elaborate sewing to small polyurethane foam and leather wrapped assembly, our products improve the look and feel of the vehicle you drive, providing comfort and luxury even on the road. Happy, golden days! The first foretaste of life was mysterious and alluring, and it was so sweet to get glimpses of it. Entry points between zones should be clearly identifiable. Indeed, sometimes members of Congress don't even know what's in the bills.. Was it, though? She could not trust her uncle, no more than she trusted this High Septon. Kentuckians sometimes came there to kidnap their citizens. The slower the Iron Throne was to react, the longer they would have to gather their strength and bring allies to the cause. But even then, choosing right technique means ones need to draw extremely detailed scenes similar to CAD programs, but such renditions will be too slow. If she decided to do something, she did it. Would kids who played in the Crab Bowl be crabs? Tell us again how you nike jean jacket come to be the parent of a graduate of leon adidas mariposas papucs győr the US Naval Academy and a military pilot. 25, Jagodzinski said he expected to see Tech again in the ACC championship. Lovejoy should not publish a paper in that city; not wishing biciclete rusesti vechi to reflect in the slightest degree upon Mr. The Virginia Tech Hokies should control the conference yet again, while programs like Miami, Florida State, and North Carolina are not quite on the level of Frank Beamer's crew just yet. There is not a neighborhood where these heart-rending scenes are not displayed. “Oberyn wanted vengeance for Elia. But, if it comes to re signing with the Lions . nike air max thea atomic pink It had to be poison. They have far more than they can find work for, and could at any time obtain a high price for them. I didn’t mean that. Like all Borrells, for five thousand years. Crossing the ditch was inevitable and right. A huge ball of smoke, triple the size of the first three strikes, rose toward the sky.It was a pinpoint strike. That’s no doubt why he has been called a Jesuit. The thick beards of the wolves were soon caked with ice where their breath had frozen, and every clean-shaved southron boy was letting his whiskers grow out to keep his face warm. It gives me a great sense of pride knowing we hanorace panda barbati are building these kids and their communities facilities that they can be proud of and will help them play more games and participate in more sports and activities. "Listen to your body and pay attention to your heart rate. “They are of my blood,” the Green Grace said, as Qezza filled her cup with a dark red wine. Also nominated were his co stars, Brandon Uranowitz and Robert Fairchild. The fact is we think she's terrific and she's been an amazing addition to the show. Go on, Jon thought.. “I’ve only seen him for a moment and that was in the street when he was getting into his carriage to drive folie samsung j6 2018 pt tot telegonil to the Countess Zinaida Fyodorovna. Having thus represented the church as one living body, inseparably united, the apostle uses a still more awful and impressive simile. In a lot of places where you film people are a little bit jaded, they're not particularly welcoming, and you get a sense that they're in it just for the money. To their number the fleet had added nine new prizes taken on the seas, so the sum was fifty-four … but the captured ships were cogs and fishing boats, merchantmen and slavers, not warships. “Seldom have I seen such grace, such beauty.” She beckoned disco duro externo pita to Reznak mo Reznak, and the seneschal scurried to her side. Young men in plaid shirts and afros loiter in the back. How can I ask Lord Wyman to condemn his son to death? What would I do in his place if Devan were a hostage? “My lord,” said Davos, “I pray no harm will come to your son, or to any man of White Harbor.”. Those foods include fats and oils such as salad oil, margarine, and sour cream.. Three hours of weekly programming will now became two and, as a result, changes will be made maybe even at the judges table.. B. Yes, locals need to figure this out quickly. I agree with kakilicli comments regarding these results being reported being subjective, parents reporting information being influenced by what they heard/read. TO REDUCE RISK DURING OUTDOOR WORK THE OCCUPATIONAL SAFETY AND HEALTH ADMINISTRATION RECOMMENDS SCHEDULING FREQUENT REST BREAKS IN SHADED OR AIR CONDITIONED ENVIRONMENTS. We are pre-eminently, phenomenally tenacious of life; has that ever struck you? We live to be eighty, ninety. Some nights, Ser Barristan wondered if he had not done that duty too well. The snow was ankle deep. I tell you so frankly because you asked me my opinion yourself.. With in demand sneakers the Jordan Retros, adidas Boost and Nike Flyknit, Finish Line has the hottest products you crave. What do you think?”. Presumably going to be alive for a long time. She might have a mouth full of water, the way she holds her tongue! She breaks my heart holding her tongue! What do you take yourself for, you saucy slut, you green monkey? If it hadn’t been for me you’d have died of hunger in the street. 20, 1999) at Cambridge Manor in Fairfield. The key countries have been divided into clusters and the revenue estimation and forecast has been completed accordingly. A long time, said resident Margaret Murphy, who braved the heat on July 25 because her daughter wanted to go to the library. Also such for more types of models, the very fact that. Our understanding of what causes, and how to treat, hypovolemic shock has progressed considerably. She screamed for other patrons to give their clothes to her anything to help put the fire out. “As for the nike sb prod x sweets, it’s difficult to say,” he began, sitting down on the sofa beside me. The kindly man had told her that they would have taken her eyes from her anyway, to help her to learn to use her other senses, but not for half a year. They found that in men with one particular variation, the odds of developing heart disease were 56% higher than inmen from the othermain genetic groups identified. So far as most of them were concerned, Connington had drunk himself to death in Lys after being driven from the company in disgrace for stealing from the war chest. One challenge facing future developers could be the fekete táska női price. She would go, she allowed, for the sake of peace, but Hizdahr zo Loraq was better suited to treat with the Wise Masters. Their footsteps echoed hollowly off the walls, the butcher’s cart rumbling behind them.. You’ll die for the wrong girl.. The devil may wear Prada, but Claire wears Louboutins.. “There you see it, Hugor Hill. “Garin’s Curse is only greyscale,” said Tyrion. Blood pays for blood, a life for a life. The store consisted of two stone buildings in one block, with doors and windows at each end, but no windows at the sides. They just slap fans on it and expect it to work. Marxer, who had been Miss Miranda's physician since she came to California and the movies in 1940, was called to the house and pronounced her dead. When her gaolers came for her, Septa Unella, Septa Moelle, and Septa Scolera led the procession.

1 note · View note