waiting in vain for thrawn to come back - dancing with a memory
i cannot stop thinking about chiss!reader who has been waiting for thrawn to come back. and he hasn't.
thrawn x chiss!reader
you have known vurawn your whole life. back when you two were just kids back in rentor, when he became the mid-ager thrawn and left for taharim academy, promising you time and time again that he would be back. that was the first time you waited for him. and when he came back, he wasn't just your friend anymore--he became yours. he took you away from rentor, brought you to naporar, and gave you his family name: mitth, as you professed your love for each other and you accepted his hand in marriage.
thrawn never broke a promise. sure, there were times when he had to be away longer than he meant to, but it was never too long.
on lonely nights, you scoot closer to his side of the bed, cold, his scent faint, and remember a young vurawn, surprisingly bright-eyed and serious for his age, "of course, i will come back!" as he cradled your cheeks in his hands before leaning in to kiss your forehead.
when he told you about the exile, you were sad--but not for the reason he thought. you didn't even think about staying behind: your home was wherever he was. you followed him across the ascendancy, you built your life together. and when he calmly told you that, "the family needs you, y/n," you scoffed and said, "but you are my family. not them. not the mitth."
you should have been more insistent.
he held your face in his hands once more, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead, like he always does, "i will only be away for a while."
you shook your head, "that could mean weeks, months, ye--"
"one year," thrawn told you resolutely, "no more than one year. not a day more." he leaned closer to you, pressing his lips to yours so gently and lovingly. "of course, i will come back," he said.
but it has been twenty-five years, and all that came was a human.
not him.
were you cursed? to wait for someone who has died? who decided you were not worth coming back to?
like clockwork, you receive a message on your questis, notifying you that your friend ar'alani has returned to naporar.
you're both much older than you were the first time you stood there, with a hopeful look on your face.
ar'alani has aged gracefully, and she carried herself with the pride and strength of a warrior. but when she saw you waiting for her, eyes silently pleading for any news, she deflated and shook her head at you weakly.
you closed your eyes, trying not to cry.
but you have been waiting for thrawn your entire life, you couldn't imagine doing anything else.
but what if he's not the person you love anymore? what will you do then?
-
thrawn turns his gaze to the viewport. he's older now, carrying many years of service to the empire. a lot of people are hoping and praying for his return.
the small, nagging voice in his head calls out to him. there was one person who had been waiting far longer than anybody else.
and she's out there waiting. he can imagine her watching the sky.
and she's waiting.
he knows she's waiting.
he knows she waits for him.
and he will return to her one day. he closes his eyes, remembering the last words he said to her, "of course, i will come back."
-
guys, he's not going back to the ascendancy...is he?
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sabezra day: fixing something
didn't get to finish a full piece so have this snippet i wrote! @sabezraweek
Her heart felt out of place in her chest, her mind offset from her body. It was the strangest thing she'd ever felt. It was the worst thing. Because there was nothing she could do. It wasn't anger (so no punching), it wasn't sadness (no punching there either), and it wasn't happiness (she'd forgotten what that felt like).
But then it was all of these things. It was everything at once. Regret. For losing them and what they'd had. A lingering awkwardness even though it had never been that way.
They'd been so good. And now it was all gone. Like those days on the Ghost never happened.
Her chest felt bitter. An all encompassing hopelessness—and for what? Because she couldn't touch her best friend's hand? Or lean in close? Or tell him that right now, she was spiraling? She had him back. That should be enough. It was enough.
Sabine shook her head. She couldn't do this to him. Not now.
“I’m gonna fix this,” she said. “I’ll fix us.”
And though the same bitterness she felt in her heart crowded his eyes, Ezra breathed out what might be a laugh. An incredulous one, like he couldn't believe her.
He gathered her hands in his—so easily, so jarringly easy—and shook his head. “We don't need fixing, Sabine. We’re not broken. We’re just. . .” He looked off, finding words. Then his eyes came back to her and they searched her face and he said, “We just have to learn each other again.”
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I know this is not your cup and of tea I just needed to scream into the void. Between Padmé and Ahsoka always seemed a better fit for Anakin as a life partner. I’m sorry
don't apologize lmao i think the premise that padmé is not actually the best life partner for anakin (and vice versa) is actually a big theme of the prequels. the idea they both would be happier and healthier elsewhere is part of the tragedy i think. ahsoka understands both anakin's experiences as a jedi and the dangerous temptation of the dark side of the force in away padmé cannot. there's stability and coherence in identity when he's romantically involved with another jedi, and ahsoka's personality suits his well. the void is listening and says you're valid haha
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