Me: *bolts awake at 3 AM* BALDUR'S GATE 3 AU WHERE, THROUGH DIMENSIONAL SHENANIGANS, KRATOS ENDS UP OCCUPYING THE ROLE OF TAV!
THINK OF IT! JUST THINK OF IT!
Companion: So any that's how that God/Being of incredible power ruined my life.
Kratos, noted Godslayer, planning how he's going to destroy yet another pantheon for these weird little mortals he's found himself in charge of: Tell me more.
*later*
Gale and Astarion: Becoming a God would fix me, I promise!
Kratos: *knocks their heads together like the Three Stooges* No.
His favorite companion is actually Jaheira because she's one of the only ones who knows how to shut the fuck up and he bonds with her and Minthara over shitty jokes and grunts of displeasure.
Mizora takes one look at him, recognizes that Wyll and Karlach are now hanging with THE KRATOS and hides in the depths of Avernus for the rest of the game.
He is hella distrustful of Selune when Shadowheart starts worshiping her instead of Shar but Dame Aylin seems alright so he's okay with it for now even if he's watching every statue of Selune they pass with a suspicious eye.
Lae'zel is now his daughter. He takes one look at this angry, disagreeable little murder-hobo and immediately starts carrying her around in a baby-backpack even as she tries to bite his face off like a feral racoon.
He's actually hella sympathetic towards Ketheric Thorm because... like... yeah...
His endgame is leading a crusade in Avernus to kill Zariel with Karlach, Wyll, Minthara, Dame Aylin and Isobel with him. And once Zariel is dead, Shar, Mystra, and Vlaakith are next on his list.
DO YOU SEE MY VISION?! DO YOU?! KRATOS BEING THE AWKWARD LEADER OF THESE LITTLE MORTAL FREAKS HE SEES A LITTLE BIT OF HIMSELF IN ALL OF THEM AND DECIDES TO HELP THEM WITH ALL 5 OF HIS B+ PARENTING SKILLS!
375 notes
·
View notes
y’all headcanoning poseidon as purposefully sending medusa’s head back to sender knowing gabe would open it is like. entirely missing the point of sally jackson’s character and also SO fucked up if it was poseidon?? who used medusa’s head to kill an asshole man?? like!! what the fuck! not to mention sally jackson?? ms. sally jackson? who kills her abusive husband? who on multiple occasions rejected the help of the man who is both a god and her former lover bc she wants to build her life herself—? and who does it? “if my life is to mean anything, i have to live it myself.” those are sally jackson’s words. the abuse itself was already incredibly watered down in the show and that is upsetting. to have gabe accidentally kill himself because he’s a bumbling idiot waters down her agency against her abuse and is even more so upsetting. to have not just a man but a literal god kill her husband for her is so. do you not see how that’s even worse. and then add in that god being poseidon and the method of murder is medusa’s head? i don’t even have words to articulate it, just—
no matter how you cut it, narratively you only disrespect and degrade sally when gabe’s life is taken by any hand that isn’t hers, and having that hand be poseidon’s is just wild.
61 notes
·
View notes
You guys don’t UNDERSTAND how cool Su Daji x Erlang Shen is
They’re what could have been.
But she had to die because otherwise Erlang would have kept following Heaven’s orders blindly. It took seeing her death for him to realize that, fuck, maybe he is a pawn for Heaven to manipulate and order around. He watched her get executed for something she was sent to do and it changed the trajectory of his fucking LIFE
ERLANG WATCHED SU DAJI DIE AND DECIDED THERE AND THEN THAT HE WOULDN’T LET HEAVEN USE HIM AS A PAWN ANYMORE LIKE BRO
And the fact that if Erlang’s sister or mother ordered him to kill Daji then he would. Because he loves no one more than he loves his mother and sister. So it wouldn’t have been endless romantic heaps of love— it would’ve been just as tragic
How more poetic can you get
85 notes
·
View notes
Why does everyone act like Percy being OP is so cool? It's not. It's fucking obnoxious.
"Oh, it's cool because he's so self-conscious in his own POV-" Shut up, shut up, shut up!
Percy is so obnoxiously OP. First off, his powers are water. That is quite literally it. He can use a sword, yes, but it is just a sword. A powerful and cool sword. But it is still a sword.
Take his fight with Carter in Demigods and Magicians. Gonna rant so, under the cut.
There is logically no way that Percy should have been able to beat Carter. Let's examine Carter's accomplishments:
Host of Horus, God of War.
14 yo him hosted a god in his body. A feat that almost no one was able to do because it can kill you.
14 yo him shoved a massive living being into the Duat Locker Thingy, something that logically should not be able to be done, but he pulled off.
15 yo was the Leader of All Magicians.
15 yo him killed a literal god (Admittedly, he did have help, but the bulk of the work fell to him and Sadie, who was 13.)
15 yo him became the weilder of the Godly Pharaoh's Crook and Flail. I forgot what they were called, but they were the God's Crook and Flail.
14 yo him fell in love with a girl, found out she was fake, dedicated himself until he found her real body and self, rescued her, and when she was uncomfortable, he backed the Hell off.
Reformed an over 2,000 year old system.
Has a "God form" or whatever from when he hosted Horus.
Dating the ex-Host of Ra and Nephthys.
Smart as fuck.
I cannot stress how smart this boy is.
He is winning the trivia nights.
There's more but it's been a while since I read TKC.
Anyway, how was Percy able to defeat him in a fight? Percy is a good fighter, but Carter used to be the literal God of War, and has magic.
"Percy can bloodbend-" Carter could take five minutes in the library with Cleo (Follower of Thoth) and find a way to prevent that. He could probably find a spell to put on a talisman and have Sadie charm it. Fuck, Sadie could probably do a spell that controls someone's body. I think she canonically did, but that might be a different thing.
"Percy is the best sword fighter in 300 years-" Best GREEK sword fighter in 300 years. Carter was, briefly, a God of War, plus has a God Avatar.
"Percy has water powers-" Carter can bend space and time to his will.
Anyway, I love Percy, but there was no way he could have won that fight.
Percy being as OP as he is, is annoying as fuck.
79 notes
·
View notes