#keeps u on ur toes

[thebearchives]

[ 21:47 ] | DR3

PAIRING: daniel ricciardo x reader

WORD COUNT: 0.9k

NOTES: mysterious danny drabble that was pulled from a scrapped max fic :D fun !

he sat alone at the bar, finger tracing against the edge of his glass. scotch on the rocks, only the rocks had melted, much like the glaciers in antarctica. 

god, he hated scotch. he’d much rather be nursing a beer…or a blunt, he wouldn’t discriminate. 

“you’ve gotta stop ordering drinks if you’re not going to drink them.”

he didn’t move, no reason to, but a slight twitch on the left side of his lip gave away his amusement. 

his eyes followed the condensation drip against the outside of the glass, “i like watching the beads drip down.” 

he pulled his finger away from the lip of the glass, wiping the tip of it against the serviette that was seeping the condensation out from under the glass. 

“oh, cut your mafioso act, ricciardo.” you slotted yourself into the seat next to him, hand raised to catch the attention of the bartender, “i’ll get a paloma, and get him a beer, would you?”

“buying me drinks already? consider me flattered.” the man, ricciardo, smiled slyly.

“consider yourself not, it’s going on your tab,” a smirk played on your lips, “not all of us make a million every weekend.”

“you and i both know it’s more than a million, sweets.” he watched as the bartender placed the pint of beer in front of him.

“call me that again and i’ll have your dick cut off before you can even register any pain.”

“kinky.”

“you're actually sickening. stop playing games, daniel, you know i’m not the one for them. what’s the gig this time?” 

“it’s right to business with you, isn’t it, y/n?” he turned his head to look over at you, the smile on his face lightening into a smirk.

“i suppose so,” you took a sip of your paloma, “or maybe i’m just tired of your theatrics.”

you finally made eye contact with daniel, “well?”

“i’ve got him.”

“him lik–”

“yeah.”

“i find it hard to believe you.”

“well, just try harder then. he’s back.”

“god, you’re so annoying,” you rolled your eyes, leaning back in your seat, “and the target? what is it?”

daniel’s fingers tapped on the table. once, then twice. “intel.”

“ah,” you nodded, “i see why i got the message, now. nice flowers, by the way. you should invest in a new jack wilder.”

“you saw me?” his eyebrows raised slightly. he hadn’t seen you when he made the drop.

“no, but your work was sloppy enough to be a signature.”

“thanks, you really know how to make my heart race.” the humour in his tone had gone dry.

the conversation moved on, “so, how are you planning to go about this?”

he stared at you. it clicked. you shook your head, “daniel, no.”

“daniel, yes,” he placed a hand down onto the granite of the counter, “come on, i’ve got more connections this time, i promise it’ll go better than last time.”

“literally anything would be better than last time,” you rolled your eyes, “i’m not sure how much i should trust your words.”

“no, i’m serious this time, y/n. i’ve really got him this time. i’ve got a way to him, it’s right there. i can see it.”

you scoffed, “oh, can you? how dirty is the road leading up to it?”

“nothing a few extra hands couldn’t handle.” he gave you a hopeful smile.

“new links?” you raised an eyebrow at him, going back to his earlier words.

daniel raised his hands, “he was gone for a while. i got bored, ended up meeting a few new people, did some different jobs. you know how it goes.”

“wow, and i didn’t get invited?” you watched as a small smile fell onto his lips.

“i wasn’t playing ringmaster,” daniel gave you a pointed look, “you said you were out, anyway.”

“and now, you want me back in.” you gave him a sly smirk, “funny.”

daniel’s smile turned serious, “it’s what we’ve been trying for our whole lives. working up to it with every gig.”

and it was true. every job the two of you had done had all been for one final job. him.

you mulled over his initial offer in your mind. “going after intel,” you started, “so no cashout?”

he shrugged, “i’m sure no one would mind if you took a little more than the intel. consider it interest.”

“that’d be quite a lot of interest. what, 20 years?”

daniel hummed, “maybe 25?”

“quite the sum” you emphasized once again.

“his entire fortune would be up for grabs when we’re done with him,” daniel took a swig of his beer, “take a share and split the rest.”

“do you trust them?” your eyes fell on his hands, looking for a tell.

“we’re all after the same thing. i do,” his fingers didn’t even shake. he was telling the truth.

“fine,” you sighed, “i’ll take your word for it, dan, but the second something feels off, i’m calling it.”

daniel smiled, sitting up straight in his seat, “wouldn’t expect anything less from you.”

you finished off your drink, “alright, then,” you got out of your seat, “you know where to find me.”

“i’ll see you soon, n/n.”

you threw a middle finger in the air at the title, already on your way out, “don’t call me that. i’m not a kid anymore.”

daniel watched as your figure disappeared within the crowd, “as you wish, bellissima.” beautiful.

#very mysterious #keeps u on ur toes #also very confusing for u all who know nothing of this storyline #I WISH I FINISHED THIS WIP #BUT ALAS #HERE U GO #maybe one day i will finish this wip and u will see this again #daniel ricciardo x reader #f1 driver x reader #f1 imagine #fluff #ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ writes #f1 imagines #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #formula one #drabble #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #timestamp #drabbles #formula 1 one shot #formula one fic #daniel ricciardo #danny ric #dr3 #dr3 drabble #daniel ricciardo fluff #daniel ricciardo x you

[ahalliance]

me googling whether time lords are face blind to check if that’s a hc or actual canon fact

#hc it seems #and a great one at that #it’s like the doctor being allergic to aspirin stuff . is this a hc that caught on or actual canon? yeah it is canon #keeps u on ur toes #jay rambles #dw.txt #also anw to expand on the faceblind hc. i love it #of course these aliens who are constantly changing their looks and who rely mostly on telepathy to communicate with one another #are faceblind. like recognising faces is useless compared to being able to reach out and connect your mind with someone else’s

[hella1975]

you ever have a fic get you in such a chokehold you start pacing your room and talking to yourself

#THIS FIC WAS WRITTEN FOR ME SPECIFICALLY #BURN IT ALL DOWN BY DOROTHYCANFLY ON AO3 THIS IS GENUINELY ONE OF MY TOP 5 FICS OF ALL TIME EVER #IT'S GOT THE BEST DABI CHARACTERISATION IVE EVER COME ACROSS IT'S GOT REALLY WELL WRITTEN DABIHAWKS #THAT FITS BOTH OF THEM LIKE THEY'RE MEAN AS HELL ABOUT IT AT FIRST #IT'S GOT STUPIDLY DEVOTED TOUYA-SHOUTO IT'S GOT PROTECTIVE BIG BROTHER TOUYA #IT'S GOT MENTAL ANGST WRITTEN LIKE A DREAM THE WRITING IN GENERAL IS INSANE #IT'S ACTION PACKED BUT DONE WELL SO THAT IT'S NOT TEDIOUS IT'S FUNNY IT'S GOT TWISTS #IT'S KEEPING ME ON MY TOES I NEVER KNOW WHAT'S COMING OR HOW FAR THE AUTHOR IS WILLING TO GO #IVE LITERALLY READ 300K WORDS IN TWO DAYS AT THIS POINT LIKE I AM ABSOLUTELY FINISHING THIS TONIGHT #WHAT THE FUCK EVEN AM I GONNA DO WITH MYSELF AFTER THIS #EVERY NEW THING THAT HAPPENS LITERALLY HAS ME GETTING UP TO PACE ABOUT #I CLOCKED OUT OF MY MUM TELLING ME OFF EARLIER BC I WAS THINKING ABOUT THIS FIC #DO U KNOW HOW DANGEROUS THAT IS BASO JUST SIGNED MY DEATH WARRANT BUT I DIDNT CARE #losing my goddamn mind respectfully <3 if anyone has read this pls yell with me about it #and if anyone knows mha and wants a fic rec PLEASE let it be this one it's my fav mha fic ever and ive read A LOT #it gets quite smutty in the middle but if that's not ur thing the author tws very well and u can kinda just scroll #so that u still get the important character developments without it being just pure smut lol #god this FIC. holding it in my fucking fist and squeezing the everloving life out of it im going INSANE #i cant remember the last time a fic got me this way im literally giggling about it all #HE FOUND A REASON TO LIVE AGAIN THEY TOOK THIS MANGLED BLOODY BOY AND SAID WE LOVE YOU #YOU ARE GOOD YOU CAN STAY YOU CAN REST NOW WE'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU AND HE CHOSE THEM! HE CHOSE THEM! #OVER HIS REVENGE AND HIS RAGE HE CHOSE THEM! IM GOING TO BE VIOLENTLY SICK #like the author LETS DABI BE A CUNT. the first chunk of the fic he's actively not a good person #and his coping mechanisms are shot to shit and we WATCH HIM GROW FROM THAT i have cried several times over the most mundane shit #goddddddddDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDAKSJFJKAGSFIUAHGJKAKG #mha #fic rec

[bougiebutchbitch]

comic concept from popular fandom that loads of people are interested in: this does not bring joy

comic concept from far less popular fandom that WAY fewer people are interested in: this one brings joy?????

why, brain. every time.

#hyperfixations are a bitch #but tbh it has done my brain SO. Much. Good. To get out of the nar*to fandom lmaoooooooo #peace and love to all my friends there - I am still on the peripheries but the sheer amount of drahma and arguing over ridiculous shit #just made me feel like I was courting constant burnout #along with being a relatively 'popular blog' in that fandom it was just wayyyyy too much with school + work + disability #and I felt guilty that I couldn't keep up with everyone's expectations and wants for me #which I know was entirely in my head!! I know people weren't disappointed when I couldn't create constantly #but burnout + brain issues is a bitch #anyway I love u narto show and I love u vast majority of the narto fandom <3 I may dip toes back in one day #In other words: I am happy and I am surviving as much as a disabled bitch can #I just wish I could guide my hyperfixations to where they'd be most popular! #still popularity was a curse on my mental health so my current b*tjokes obsession is truly a blessing #rambles #nobody take this personally challenge; I'm literally just spitballing about my Feelings not attacking ur fandom xxx

[bylertruther]

for the sake of my poor dignity yall cannot continue to let me try to talk to u whenever im sleepy. i am speaking GIBBERISH . if u feel me start to approach u if u just Sense it somewhere in the world through your screen u need to jus send me a quick "no. go to bed or get some coffee. do not engage ✋️" bc i look back at the shit i say and im . how do u guys even understand me sometimes 😭😭😭😭😭😭

#when im sleepy squinting at my phone i think im speaking perfectly eloquently even and then hours pass and im like 😳🫣🤡😅 #embarazzeeng..... but thts jus part of my Charm. keeps u on ur toes builds ur literacy n problem solving skills im literally sexy duolingo

[eebie]

last post was a test everyone FAILED!

#i keep u all on ur toes …

[obiwan]

drop names of who's calling your gifs ugly, I would like to have a word with them 🙃

Look, they're not wrong per se, of course gifs you make from trailers have a lesser quality, I guess I just didn't expect a whole BARRAGE of insults over it lmao, it's not that deep. It's the decade old spiel we've been whining about for years now, tumblr content creator dynamics have changed drastically in the past 10 years, but it becomes kind of a moot point to keep blaming other people when content creators are the least of the issue imo. But oh well, I'll move on. I don't like negative energy on my blog, I was just surprised when I was linked to it.

#anonymous #answered #to be called lifeless by another content creator on here sfgsfdg #and on my busiest time too #i'm keeping u on ur toes :)

[sipsteainanxiety]

shay !! please tell me about your passion project !!! 🥺🩷✨️

HELLO WILL!!!!!!!!!! ✨️✨️✨️ i am simply going to leave a screenshot of the summary for u to see!! it's still very much in the organization stage but!! i think it will be fun!! it's essentially a love letter from me... actually, it'll require me sliding into ur dms to ask u a few things!!

#gamer girling w shay #but!! that will not be for... a while i think LOL #going to keep u on ur toes #will!! 🌸

[rat-off-string]

inflicting infinite emotional whiplash on my mutuals and followers by reblogging hard-hitting posts about how to deal with trauma and become a better person followed by 5000 shitposts

#and then after i post all that is a post about that old man. #keep u on ur toes. dont trust my posting habits #blog lore

[boxwinebaddie]

Hi Nina! I know we can't know too much about the side characters, but are there any crumbs you can tell us about?

oooh!!! honestly i love all the rm side characters -- and by that i mean like...75% of the characters in south park because for some reason i decided to put like all of them in rm, which is such a nightmare smh.

but hmmmmm....okay. so there's a kyle-centric side plot i really like in rm that shows up pretty soon ( that's why i'm not that worried about talking about it ) that is basically sort of kyle's legally blonde / righteously readhead moment where kyle's crimina laur professor AKA mr. motherfucking mackey, Babey! puts out this batshit insane, hard ass, ball-busting, literally Impossible To Pass midterm from hell, mmkay? and the 4 students that score the highest on the exam get to work with him on a pro-bono real life case out there in the world.

& the students that score the highest, better known as Jersey's Lawyer Core Four, ( yes, theyre a ragtag group of misfits, no they do not work well together/like each other v much at first ) are as follows:

kyle broflovski, heidi turner, tolkien black...

...and clyde donovan LKSHDSSKDHSD

( more on the sillies below...theyre jst Concepts atm but here! <3 )

now, back to clyde who....Sigh....

...everyone assumes got chosen because clyde's father essentially runs the university and his mother was a Crazy Talented Lawyer Lady who became the world's youngest supreme court justice before she passed -- i want to say clyde either indirectly caused/was present when she died and his father never forgave him/resented him for it...

but uhhhhh actually he just filled in the scantron in the shape of a Dinosaur and scored ONE POINT HIGHER THAN KYLE....do u know how MAD kyle was??? ohhhmg he was like yOU MUSTVE CHEATED YOU DONT DESERVE TO BE HERE U FUCKEN HALFWIT kyle is about to strangle clyde during the entire fanfiction smh i love the lawyer side plot so much hes like constantly running from kyle oof

but yeah thats clyde...he is the Big Man on Campus. hes kind of frat boy obnoxious like id call him a himbo but hes a chad tbh...HES GOT A GOOD HEART THO!!! he Means Well hes just suuuch a fkn disaster.

also i talk about him in a different ask ( someone asked me abt lesbian bebe! <3 ) but clyde has been in 'love' with bebe like his whole life and the running gag is he keeps trying to ask her out and has struck out Every Single Time its so funny help i luv him hes so LAME like clyde pls stop flexing she doesnt Want u!! shdjksd HE CRIES A LOT...clyde & ravenstan collab when oh my god...which tbh i do not think clyde likes cd but he respects their ability to pick up girls smh...

( also note: clydes a bicon but he does Not kno that yet...pray 4 him )

AND i actually think hes a REALLY GOOD lawyer!!! he has his moms passion and innate ability! but hes a disorganized mess and no one thinks that the can do it so he psyches himself out a lot...but hes gonna Shock Us All! HES A SLOW BURN OKAY!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU CLYDESDALE ) hes also craigs super best friend...no1 gets it. theyre brothers/soul bonded. like they are a truly iconique duo, tbh.

so uhhhh heidi works at grounded with kyle!!! i dont have her fleshed out but obvi she is our environmental law erin brockovich crunchy granola queen. her hair goes down to her ass...always smoking that grass...she is pagan, very good friends with tweek ( witchy legends ), she wears a lot of big funky statement jewelry, v sweet, v shy, but is at every single campus protest, lesbian but uh...cant talk to girls...

particularly one girl...with cool dyed red hair and a really cool sternum tattoo...who bartends at the lesbian bar and sometimes plays really kick ass indie rock music/is currently tryin to make it big like crimson dawn...possibly half peruvian and cousins w/craig. anyways! heidi is very lovely and kyle actually likes her very much because she lowkey reminds him of stan and marjorine combined into one person so he is very scary older brother overprotective of her bc shes his baby gay law student little sister and a strong breeze will blow her over....smh.

and finally, tolkien black is in a similar boat as kyle where there was a lot of pressure for him to fall into a certain profession but i think that tolkiens dad in the rm verse was like a very famous director and his mom was also involved in acting/film industry ( i think he may actually know raven/co. bc his dad helped direct their music vids ). tldr; tolkiens family is v affluent, indulgent and Rich Rich. like richer than fkn god like i think he was delivered on a yacht tbh. That RICH.

and tolkien was supposed to just fall into that role of acting...but has no interest in following in his parents footsteps/using them to make a name for himself or pretending to be someone hes not for that matter ( and just to pay homage to the show, i might have it so he changed his name from token to tolkien bc token was vapid ) and wanted to become a lawyer bc hes passionate abt pro-bono cases, specifically public defending/helping people who don't have help.

he has a very generous and gorgeous soul, the inside matches the outside tbh...him and kyle dress the best ( heidi is very light, airy, flowy shirts & long skirts, clyde is sloppy frat boy outfits/backwards hat/reps his fraternity [ hes president ], tolkien is kind of chill, casual, understated ( he also has dreads hes so fine ) not flashy but sort of effortlessly put together and kyle is giving crazy dead 1920s evil dark academia tired classics professor realness...hes so hot pls i luv him DREAM TEAM...NIGHTMARE FROM HELL TEAM IF U WILL!!! )

clyde and tolkien also clash and argue a lot in rm/hate each other p much. which uh, in my fanfiction, is v interesting...thats all imma say.

but yeah!!!!! jersey justice lgbt lawyer law student odd squad rise!!!!!

-uncle nina, who can quote legally blonde from memory

p.s. im gonna say clyde and kyle are sp native and heidi and tolkien are not from sp...to keep things interesting...anyways! i hope you enjoyed my weird info dump. these are...my kids...my babies, omg.

#HLKDHLKSHD #IDK #my medication kicked in so im being unhinged #but yes one of my fav rm side plots is the lawyer subplot #where mr mackey takes weird rag tag lawyer core four w him on a case and they have to work together and its such a mess #no one...really likes clyde...bc hes a dumbass ( i luv clyde ) bc he doesnt want to do any work he wants 2 party ( i get it ) #heidi is trying to like him even tho he keeps hitting on her smh shes like clyde...i am sapphic and hes like what country is that #like everyone likes heidi bc shes the best but she is a little spacey sometimes and doesnt want to step on toes #kyle and tolkien actually respect each other a lot in rm THEYRE JUST FRIENDS OK!!! they also have radically different lawyer styles #tolkien is very cordial diplomatic but charasmatic and kyle is very calculating and frightening and incendiary #they are both like i dont fuck w the way u do ur thing...but ur a cool person u dress nicely ur strong and u fight for what u believe in #heidi and tolkien are like lets find a peaceful solution and clyde and kyle are like burn it all to the ground baby!!! #i do think clyde is the best lawyer out of every1...its just that no one has ever believed in him & hes never tried hard before #IM DONE NOW I GOT EXCITED #im gonna make the side characters pinterest sections soon so u can see them but i hope this makes sense a lil? I LOVE THEM

[transylvanianfamilies]

#transylvanianfamilies original again...... remember when someone got mad at me for not posting my pronouns online #its to Keep u on ur toes !!!! #this also applies to lib transsexuals btw. stop trying to subtly define my gender in ur head #𖦹

[ghostcasket]

hello! i just read your levi x xavier hallmark movie au. i love them so much. i need to know more! how did brunch went? did xavier helped levi to choose a puppy from the adoption center? what's the new puppy name? did they kissed under a mistletoe? anyway... levier forever. pls let me know if you write part ii <3 ps. you are a fantastic writer!

hi !!! thank u very much for reading i’m thrilled <3

#jes.inbox #for ur questions: #(keeping them in the tags bc Hehehe #brunch went excellent #levi adopted a little pittie :’) her name is nala #xavier didn’t help pick her out but he Does receive many pictures of her all the time #they did not in fact kiss under a mistle toe cuz by the time they get together holiday season is decidedly over #but the Next christmas levi is very obnoxious about kissing under as many mistletoes as physically possible #<3333 thank u for the ask !!!

[cactusringed]

This is a sign that it's time for me to go to BED. Goodnight everyblockie don't let the phantoms bite

#The Clovis ring #To those who did see ur welcome <3 keeping u on ur toes LMAO

[elegyofthemoon]

people are so interesting o v o

#snow speaks #friends tag #studied and got dinner w friends and its just so interesting to hear peoples stories tbh jdjdjdksks #i spent most of my life being a hermit and only really got out of my shell the past... couple of years? #also thanks to friends fdhdjdjs #but its so wild to hear peoples experiences that i could NOT even imagine going through #its that plus like 'i would never thought id meet someone like this but here you are' #but the world is big and youre bound to meet interesting people thats what makes life fun and keeps u on ur toes #it was a fun night (ALSO THERE WERE FIREWORKS WHEN WE WERE LEAVING THE RESTAURANT!!) #(also the stars were out it was very pretty c: i felt bad i spaced out during the convo bc i was too focused on them LOL) #but yeah.... people are very interesting o v o

[izzy-b-hands]

Ongoing PTSD breakdown trauma stuff below the cut, pls ignore, just need to spew it somewhere that like. I know my feelings will be safe to have and type up and whatever. Also, sorta? mild our flag spoilers under the cut bc my brain is a mess and I use characters I love to help metaphor out and explain my own shit so. yeah. that's also a thing here.

Motherfucking random traumatic memory abt Mum fucking. Randomly hitting me while I'm writing fic (for no apparent reason, no idea what triggered my brain to throw this at me when I WAS NEARLY DONE WITH THE FUCKING FIC NO LESS)

So goddamn rude. I'm off my track on the fic now, so I'm setting it aside for the night (we have Ren Faire today (it literally just hit midnight lol), but after that I want to get back to it) and realising I should really write this memory down.

Like. all of the little details about it, the bits of Mum and I and our relationship surrounding it. Both because my brain does tend to shutter some of those things away and makes them hard to get to without it being stupid lengthy a process involving talking out every feeling I'm having with someone else(unless it pulls some shit like tonight, then suddenly it's no fucking problem throwing it all over the place apparently) and because like

I don't know if I could say this one out loud to anyone, but I think I should. Probably a therapist, but it's one of those stupid trauma things of you just Want Someone, Anyone To Know, Now. To acknowledge it and say if it was as fucked up as it feels (bc I will never deny the possibility that I'm being dramatic and it isn't, and I should just. chill the fuck out about it.)

But every time I start trying to type it out I get hit with this wave of a physical response where my arms and wrists and fingers feel like they're clenching up and I Can't type it. And there's a part of me that doesn't want to because if I can see it in letters on a page, then it's real. It's real and it happened and maybe it was as fucked up as it feels like it was and if that's all true then like. it fits with everything else about our relationship that's already fucked up, from the severe (better than it used to be, but I'm sure it's very clear to y'all that it's still Not Good even though I've moved away from her) co-dependence to the emotional incest (fun fact: that term feels like a gut punch every time I hear it, and I've heard it from my therapist more than a few times now over the past 9ish years of treatment.) So I shouldn't be shocked by that or like, upset, right?

Yet I'm here typing this out to put off typing it up, and I'd bet money I don't necessarily have that I'll wind up putting my laptop away, showering, and going to bed without getting it typed. For better or for worse.

Part of the reason I worry so much abt Frenchie this season (aside from that I love him and he's one of my faves and I want nothing but good and happy for him) is because I also subscribe to his 'shove all the fucked up shit you've seen/experienced in a box in your mind and just. Never open it unless you're putting more in there' method of coping (have all my life, it was so weirdly validating to see it onscreen like that explained so plainly) and like. This is me when the box somehow pops open when I didn't mean it to, and I both want Frenchie to be able to process the things that have happened to him but also don't want to see a character I love so much hurt like this. Because it feels like a big stupid gaping open wound in my chest that I'm being entirely too dramatic about, no matter how valid feeling that way abt it might be.

Kind of hope I can just shut the lid on the box so I can get done and go to sleep after I post this. Should I actually type out the memory and everything? I hate to think that the answer my therapist would have given me, if I could afford to be seeing her rn, would be yes. But the thing is, I have fucking Ren Faire tomorrow in my Izzy cosplay (that Housemate says I look good in, which I'll vainly admit I'm rather happy about, even if it is a very inaccurate and homemade cosplay that's missing certain details I can't yet afford to buy), and I don't want to be dealing with any of this for the rest of the night/into tomorrow. I need to sleep so I can go have some fucking fun, for once. I even feel ok to bring my cane with folded in my bag, just in case I need it, bc that would still be in character if I wind up needing to use it. I can count on one hand the times I've had a fun experience where I also felt safe admitting when my body was hurting and using a physical aid to help it get by; I'm not losing this one.

It's not getting typed out, and I need to duct tape that fucking box shut for now.

#text post #long post #tw ptsd #ngl kind of feeling exhausted and can't think of what other tws to add so if y'all see one I should have pls msg me and I can add asap #here or on discord if u have my discord info whatever works #im going to shut my laptop down shower and try to force myself to cry in there #bc the fact that I haven't had a big physically painful sob session means I'm not fully done with this rough patch bc they ALWAYS get bette #after I have The Big Sob Session #until I have it I just have to work hard to keep myself together and not let it affect other stuff which tbh #this stuff ive carried so long that even in like. active breakdown or wtf ever u wanna call it #masking and getting by in public is somehow still easy enough #but that's another thing I'm fucking off to the shower pls cross ur fingers and toes that i at least cry a little in there so I can sleep l

[philzokman]

me after claiming to be a multi acc and only ever posting bsd related content with the occasional 2am breakdown

#sometimes u gotta do a little bit of lying #gotta keep yous on ur toes u know #JDHSJSHS