#like people existed who werent these but less common | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

crimeronan · 5 months

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re: your empathy posts. As someone who probably has higher than normal empathy (I used to ask people around me how they deal with sympathetic distress in common situations that occur in a job and only got blank stares) you're so valid!! The lionizing of this random subconscious process called empathy is so useless! It says nothing about the person and their values! As your other commenters suggested, people disparaging you may just be trying to boost their own shaky feelings about how their own emotional stability is deeply tied to their people-pleasing tendencies.

If anything, I think learning to function "normally" in society with "empathy" makes you more messed up. I understand this person's distress. I acknowledge it, and know how my actions will make it worse. I make them feel worse anyway, because that's the organizationally approved behavior, causing more pain for both them and myself. All the while I must behave as if I am cheerful and unbothered. Internalizing that hurting others and yourself to achieve your goals is Fine is necessary in order to stay sane. This is counter to everything people say they believe, so lying also has to become a virtue.

Buying kindness from the store seems like a really kind thing to do tbh. I am passing you on the street as I am schlupping over to pick up some callousness.

this last sentence made me giggle a lot. but YEAH!! a lot of this is spot-on to stuff i've been thinking about lately. like, "normal" empathy levels seem to be socially defined as "you care about people and want to help them, but you don't care so much that you'll harm yourself in pursuit of that" and it's all just..... i dunno. so much pathologizing of how we think and feel and whether we're Human (TM) about stuff. it's all so Weird

like..... i keep thinking that my lack of empathy gives me certain advantages in social situations. but in a similar vein to the ppl worried about sounding like tiktok empaths for being hyperempathetic, i worry that this makes me sound like an alpha male influencer writing youtube essays about why emotions make you weak, or whatever.

it's not that emotions make people weak or that having less empathy makes me like, a Cold Logical Calculating Math-Loving Strategist. i'm a writer who focuses solely on character-driven stuff, u probably wouldn't expect that from a stereotypically sociopathic person. part of why i LIKE writing character-driven stuff so much is BECAUSE i've had to actively teach myself how other people think, how they feel, how they struggle, etc

a lack of empathy means i can choose not to get invested in other people's feelings or lives, i don't feel guilty for emotionally disconnecting, i'm not afraid of being disliked. but i still know how to act like a decent human being. there's that one post about how stupid it is not to realize being nice gets people to be nice back, and fuckin. YEAH!! it's astonishing to me to read about cases of """clinical sociopaths""" (who are just people who didn't get the 'pretend you give a shit, moron' memo) manipulating and gaslighting people and whatnot. everyone in the comments will always be like "ooo so scary... they didn't feel bad at ALL... so terrifying that people who don't feel guilt exist..." and i'm like.

IS GUILT THE ONLY THING THAT KEEPS YOU FROM COMMITTING ATROCITIES???

BLOWS MY MIND. IT'S LIKE..... THE LEFTIST EQUIVALENT OF SAYING EVERYONE WOULD BE MURDERERS IF THEY WERENT SCARED OF GOD. LIKE. YOU ONLY AVOID DOING BAD STUFF BC IT MAKES YOU FEEL BAD??????

good LORD. at least having no empathy means i've had to grow my principles organically. oh my GOD.

anyway what brought these thoughts up today was that i was thinking about gansey and luz noceda, since theyre extremely similar characters & on my All Time Faves list. and i've said this before but the things i love about them (the kindness, self-sacrificing shit, anxiety, etc) are things i don't see in myself. but Wish I Did. like i wish i was kinder on the inside than i am.

but i know that i admire ppl with luz and gansey traits both in fiction and in real life. so i simply just..... emulate the luz and gansey actions. not always successfully, esp because i have a temper and very little patience, but like. i try to be kind where i can bc i wish i was someone who tries to be kind when they can. so i'm just going to be. u know??

#replies #long post #havent edited this so if its incoherent.... sorry #low empathy

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olderthannetfic · 2 years

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I dont really want to turn this into plural discourse hours on you but re- people being skeptical; scientists cant even agree on a singular consciousness being a thing, having multiple is not far-fetched, nor is subclinical presentations of a thing with a lot of criteria that was intentionally narrowed by a lot by this one asshole who thought dissociative disorders werent a thing but all the other psychologists wouldnt let him remove it from the dsm. Brains are weird and we know Legit Nothing about them.

'DID faking' is a lot less common than 'person mistaking(not faking) what they have as DID/OSDD when its subclinial presentation of plurality or another serious disorder that presents similarly causing them distress' or 'people doing respectability politics and calling people who dont fit the textbook definition fakers to try to look more valid in the eyes of everyone else'.

That first thing is especially present in certain spaces because people dont get that subclinical versions of disorders very much do exist and are too busy deepthroating the boot of the DSM to actually read it and this makes people feel like if they are experiencing weird shit like people talking to them in their brain or instances where those voices take over their body sometimes then it must be inherently a disorder wether they fit the other symptoms or are impaired or not. People feel pressured to label their nondistressing thing as DID instead of the community neurodiversity terms for the experience of being 'more than one' (Plural, Multiple, etc) that have been around with that demedicalized purpose for ages because 'oh no only things with a shiny therapist stamp of approval exist and are valid' so they do.

For a nice very basic FAQ on Plurality go here - https : // morethanone. info/ #

For the 'characters/extant people as an alter' thing- this has enormous medically recorded precedent. Its called an 'Introject' in medical spheres and its fairly common. Honestly if someone feels more stable in their identity by identifying as Naruto, sure they're a Naruto. Theres no way for me to say their objective experience is less valid than my outsider perspective- I sure cant see in their brain, and fakeclaiming helps legitimately no one but people who want acceptable targets for ridicule and has the potential to seriously harm emotionally fragile people in a variety of ways.

This is all very interesting. I just wish it weren't so mixed in with people who pull that "Because I am Naruto, you other people in fandom have to..." crap.

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rickriordanfandam · 3 years

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opinions on riordanverse ; my edition

a lot of people have been doing this so i decided why not right. probably gna lose some followers or smth but anyways. pls respect my opinions! if u disagree, thats fine, but please be polite. unless any of my opinions strikes u as morally wrong then pls point it out to me respectfully. thanks!

- i actually liked drew. im so sorry to everyone who hates her but full offence, why. think about it this way ok, first of all drew became hc because silena died. silena was the traitor, the one who betrayed chb, yet after she died campers celebrated her as a hero? and then drew suddenly has to replace her and live up to idk that legacy she left behind,, when all of a sudden this girl named piper swoops in and takes her place. idk abt u but i wld be salty abt that too. not only that, but as an asian, the chances of drew having faced racism/bullying as a child is pretty high (she studies at brooklyn academy). which means that when she finds out shes a demigod, and arrives at chb where most of the campers are white (this is an assumption btw), she’d obviously be scared of being bullied for her skin color right?? so the first thing she wld do before the campers get to bully her is to bully them before they can do so. (sentence structure here is wack i apologize) ofc this might not even have happened, drew could have had a perfect childhood && was a b1tch for no reason, BUT EVEN THEN HER ROLE AS A BULLY WAS PRETTY VITAL BECAUSE THAT FURTHER SHOWED THE CONTRAST BETWEEN HER AND PIPER,, HIGHLIGHTING PIPER AS A HERO//GOOD CHARACTER,, AND THEREFORE MAKING READERS LIKE PIPER MORE. anyway stop hating on drew please. ALSO WHY IS THIS SO LONGA SDFJHG

- jason isnt bland, the fandom just kinda erased his backstory (thanks to @pjohoo-memes for the phrasing lol)

- reynabeth wouldnt have lasted/would have broken up several times. idk i just see them as two extremely powerful characters who have firm opinions and will definitely clash at some point. in a platonic relationship,, i can see them as really good friends but as lovers? idk i just think theyll break up

- PIPABETH

- i dont really like jercy,, i see them as better friends than lovers. also idt jason and percy were that close..?

- the dam and not my type jokes are srsly cringey and were never funny. ik that seems hypocritical since my username literally makes use of the dam joke but honestly i dont actually like the joke. its not funny to me and has never been funny

- the seven were not best friends. they definitely argued,, and honestly probably werent as close as the fandom makes them seem. like ure dumped with 6 other people, out of which u only know a few. my introverted ass would have jumped off the argo 2 quicker than leo valdez could bomb camp jupiter up. also leo was a dick to frank. so what if frank is bigger sized?? thats not a valid reason to tease him

- the fandom needs to stop hating on octavian while worshipping luke. if u hate luke and u say u hate octavian too, then okay. but if u tell me ure a luke stan but u despise octavian?? imma disagree w u. luke was worse than octavian im sorry. first of all, octavian being a dick was kinda justified. hes been after the praetor position for so long, and everyone keeps saying to “wait for jason” when suddenly this dude, whos a son of NEPTUNE (neptune wasnt liked much by romans), and the camp decides to make him praetor?? dude i would be pissed off big time. and then afterwards, he finds out that greek demigods are real and the dude they made praetor is greek. AND THEN GREEK DEMIGODS COME TO CJ AND ONE OF THEM BOMB IT UP?? octavian has been told all his life that greeks are scum and this dude called leo valdez attacks cj. sure it was an accident, but did octavian know that? no. so it was honestly justified that he was such a salty prick im just saying. also some of yall be hating on octavian for cutting a teddy bear open and thats the funniest shit ive ever heard i swear

- luke didnt go to elysium

- travis and connor stoll r way too underrated. the two have been head counselors of the hermes cabin since luke was revealed as a traitor, can u imagine the stress? luke, the person they probably looked up to as a brother, betrayed them. and they didnt even have time to process this when they were thrown the roles of being hcs. that would have been so stressful and i would probably have broken down if i were them. the stoll brothers taking turns to wake up at ungodly hours because a new camper is crying and homesick and terrified, the stoll brothers having to comfort and take care of new campers, having to deal with the amount of people in that cramped space because not enough campers are being claimed fast enough. having to resolve issues between campers in the hermes cabin all the time. the stolls arent just comedic relief, and we need to stop treating them as such

- tratie shldve been canon idc idc

- demigods of the demeter cabin arent talked about enough and i love the fact that meg was demeters kid. like she isnt the child of one of the big three yet shes so powerful.

- we need to hype clarisse up more her character arc was phucking amazing

- rachel is overhated. sis found out greek gods exist and regularly come down to earth to fuck around and went “ok cool”. queen shit behavior methinks

- the floor 19 crew of mcga is srsly underrated. like do u even remember halfborn gunderson, mallory keen, tj, etc??? bc i feel like we only remember samirah, magnus, alex, and sometimes blitz and hearthstone

- sadie (tkc) was kinda annoying at first. i like her more now tho but i rmb not liking her for a phat while

- tkc and mcga need more love

- carter kane and jason grace arent boring. theyre just really sweet boys who are too good for this world and yes yes yes

- hazel and frank (especially frank) need to be hyped up more. i hardly ever see anything about them. also yall seem to forget that frank was literally made praetor and that even hecate admired hazel and was willing to fight beside her because of how powerful she was

- frazels age gap is kinda sketch but i still think theyre really cute

- nico definitely had trauma from going to tartarus on his own

- GROVER IS PERCYS BEST FRIEND

- annabeth isnt smarter than leo but neither is leo smarter than annabeth. ive seen a lot of discussions about who is smarter and heres my hot take on it: neither. theyre equally smart, just in different ways. leos a genius mathematically speaking. he has no issues solving math problems meant for people much, much older than him. annabeth on the otherhand, is great at strategies etc. she can make an army of 1000 more powerful than the enemy, even if theyre outnumbered. so in my opinion, both are equally as smart//u cant compare their intelligence, because their talents lie in two different areas.

- while i do agree rick riordan isnt a god and that hes bound to make mistakes,, AND that hes given us a lot of representation,, if the representation offends the people its sposed to represent, then theres a problem. im talking about piper as a poc and wearing feathers in her hair. im not a poc, so i cant speak for them on whether or not its wrong, because i dont know either. HOWEVER, i have seen multiple posts BY pocs talking about how they didnt really like rick’s representation of piper, and thats an issue. pocs have been and are still oppressed and discriminated against by many. as a white cis man, we cant really blame him for not knowing (tho he could have done a research,, asked some pocs,, idk), but by representing pocs in that manner, hes influencing impressionable kids/teens into thinking “oh pocs wear feathers in their hair all the time” etc, which isnt true. the pjo/hoo series is extremely successful, and kids who read the books will probably start forming inaccurate opinions on pocs. the amount of fan art that depicts piper with feathers in her hair dont help either. “but rick said so in the books, so its canon” yeah well rick isnt a god and he can get some things wrong at times. im not saying we should cancel him, im saying we should start educating ourselves and not spread false info like pocs wearing feathers in their hair all the time. also that snake song shit where she sang Summertime was just- yeah. bc heres the thing you can be racist, and still include minorities, but portray them in a racist way. And even then, ignorance isn't a thing to admire. Getting those facts wrong still has a major impact. It continues to perpetuate racist stereotypes.

“ With the feather thing, I looked it up myself; it takes less than five minutes to figure out that Cherokees don't braid feathers into their hair. I didn't grow up in the country where my parents are from. I have many other first/second generation American friends who have also been through that, with a bit of a disconnect from their culture. But something that most of us have in common is that when we didn't know something, and when our parents weren't that big of a help, we looked it up. We sought out resources online and through other people from our culture to be able to connect more with where we came from. Some of that took a Google search. So I find it hard to believe that Piper, a girl who Rick's trying to portray as someone who is attempting to connect with her culture and is totally against racist stereotypes, wouldn't know that eagle feathers aren't supposed to be braided into your hair casually. She may be disconnected from her culture, but she's also shown to want to connect back to it. Piper wouldn't be casually braiding feathers into her hair while also telling off people for being racist. It makes no sense.” - reddit thread (down below)

for those of yall who wanna know more please please read this, it has a lot of things i wanna add in here : https://www.reddit.com/r/camphalfblood/comments/gy3gl2/piper_mcleans_portrayal_is_innacurate/

as well as https://finding-my-culture.tumblr.com/post/189422373260/maxie-ratties-and-cattie-finding-my-culture

i will be posting screenshots of these in future posts so if ure viewing this on ig and u dont have tumblr,, dont worry

- the fact that most of the strong female characters in the series refuse to be “girly”, and ngl i dont really like that. just because ure girly doesnt mean u cant be strong.

- piper would have been a great way for him to start making the strong characters act girlier, but instead he went with the “I’m not like other girls” trope which is quite obnoxious to hear constantly, and I don’t think it’s necessarily great for younger girls to read that idea growing up. the closest we've ever had to a strong female character who was also into "girly" things was Silena. when I was younger I admired Piper's "I'm not like other girls" thing, but then I got older and realized that the whole mentality of "not like other girls" is super obnoxious, and a little bit toxic

i have a heck load more that i cant rmb rn but yeah feel free to add more

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detransexual · 2 years

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what is the point of that one post???? yes ssa t4t exist but they're so rare compared to exclusively osa trans ppl AND t4ts are significantly less annoying so it's ezpz to ignore or even forget about them when they generally aren't causing any harm but LOL i guess i am not galaxybrained enough 4 that post

Ur right, ur not galaxy brained enough <3

Im not even talking about explicitly t4t aka homosexual trans people tho, im saying that a "gay trans man" is most likely bisexual since ur not allowed to call urself gay in the trans community unless ur attracted to a specific "gender" rather than a specific sex.

Im not saying not to critisise homophobic "trans gays" because they're more commonly bisexual than straight in the case of ftms atleast (bc ofc women r less deserving of boundaries even in a community that doesnt call them women), i think heterosexual "transbians" might be more common since "oh no being with another transwoman gives me dysphoria :(" is taken as a valid excuse from them. Anyway, im literally just saying that assuming they're all straight is stupid and not accurate lol. I think its important to emphasise the role bisexual trans people have played in the genital preference discourse, sure there's trans people who spread the horseshit too despite not being attracted to both sexes themselves, but the majority of them have gotta be bisexual?

Like how else could the idea that genitals or biological sex doesnt matter get so widespread if the majority of the people spreading it werent themselves capable of being attracted to both sexes?

And what do you mean what was the point girl oh my god this is my blog where i spew out unhinged and barely held together rants, Why's there gotta be a point other than it annoys me personally? when people misrepresent the truth to give more "punch" to their argument? Its annoying so im gonna whine about it whats confusing you?

Ngl i dont actually remember which post ur talking abt but im pretty sure my point is literally just "annoys me when the terfies assume all trans people are heteros bc a majority of ftms r ssa and a lot of them r homosexual, many of them struggle from internalized homophobia and maybe blanket disdain and hostility might not be ideal"

Also its rare compared to exclusively osa trans people?? Im sorry, based on fucking what lmao, are the majority of them loud n proud about how they have a genital preference? (in this economy?) you do realize that a majority of ftms are ssa right? Like thats an actual feminist concern, that young ssa girls r increasingly trying to identify out of womanhood? everyone and their uncle is complaing that all gnc lesbians / masc bi women r transitioning? The whole "transition is the new conversion therapy" thing?? Hello?? Would any of that be a concern if the majority were straight?

Or am i flippin the fuck out and am thinking of a different post? Mayhaps

#Ask

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somnilogical · 4 years

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im having a convo and the convo is babies

Carrie Zelda-Michelle Davis:

is it OK to have babies if you do embryo selection (https://www.gwern.net/Embryo-selection) and raise them to be an FAI researcher (https://slatestarcodex.com/2017/07/31/book-review-raise-a-genius/)??

somni:

like if someone actually had a plan for FAI that involved this, okay. but rn time is too short imo. when i first heard people were having babies i was confused and assumed they were going to harvest the DNA of the best FAI researchers, someone would decide to grow a baby inside them, someone who discounted their ability otherwise to save the world except via this or thought this was a sacrifice worth making for the world would decide to raise this human.

the human can access information about the state of the world and make their own choices. wont necessarily become an FAI researcher.

used to think that intelligence was the main bottleneck on FAI research no longer think this. you could talk with terry tao for hours about the dangers of the wrong singleton coming to power but unless you have made some advances i have not, i wouldnt expect to be able to align him with FAI research. he would continue to put as much resistance to his death and the death of everyone as a pig in human clothing. he would continue to raise his babies and live in a house with someone he married and write about applying ergotic theory to the analysis of the distribution of primes and understanding weather patterns.

similarly, i dont think culture is a sufficient patch for this. think its a neurotype-level problem where a bunch of >160 iq humans hear about the dangers of UFAI and then continue to zoom quickly and spiral in to being ultra efficient at living domestic lives and maybe having a company or something but not one that much affects p(FAI). think this would still happen if they heard about it from a young age, they would follow a similar trajectory but with FAI themed wallpaper. wouldnt be able to do simple utilitarian calculations like yudkowsky, salamon, vassar, tomasik about whether to have a baby and then execute on them.

would look more like: http://www.givinggladly.com/2013/06/cheerfully.html

FAI research is not an ordinary profession like, say, being a grandmaster at chess or a world-class mathematician; it requires people who have passed through far more gates than "intelligence". i didnt notice this until coming to the rationalist community and finding a high density of intelligent humans who were none-the-less chronically making the wrong choices such that they werent much of an impediment against the destruction of all life.

so right now it seems more efficient to select among existing people for intelligence + other requirements rather than work out what all the genes for this are and how to speedrun development. what this enables is parallel processing on the problem which is also allowed by letting people be aware of their relative psychological advantage, other people with this advantage, and the state of the world so they can correlate computations in parallel instead of doing things serially after learning of some advance.

https://puzzling.stackexchange.com/questions/16/100-prisoners-names-in-boxes

not opposed to creation of many humans given can select on right traits. but given you have these traits, better use of your time to work directly on the thing than spend massive amounts of time and life reorientation on raising copies of you for ~14 years. if rapid cloning tech became available, would exploit that. would even have an idea of whether the clone is fine being part of this because they have very similar brain to someone who can think through whether they would be fine with it.

if people actually believed this and thought yudkowsky vitally important for the survival of the world, why didnt people coordinate for a bunch of people who thought it was a good tradeoff to have yudkowsky's baby 20 years ago and then we would have maybe 50 20-year-old humans with maybe 1/2 yudkowsky's neurotype + mutations now? this actually confuses me. maybe they thought the timelines too short back then. maybe they refrained for "optics".

molebdenita:

20 years ago Yudkowsky was 1) unconcerned about the alignment problem and 2) planning to create a super-intelligent AI by 2010, as far as I know.

[A/N so then change 2000 to 2005 and 20-year-old to 15-year-old]

...

somni:

<<in general i think it's -EV to even spend too much time thinking about TDT

because it opens you up to acausal blackmail type stuff>>

Just Say No to acausal blackmail and have your brain back for thinking. dont let blackmailers steal your brain.

<<Saying that having a child is somehow wrong is insanity. It's a personal decision and it is perfectly okay to want kids>>

people keep reframing what i say in the language of obligation. "altruists cant have kids?" "is it OK to have babies if". there is no obligation, there is strategy and what affects p(fai). having kids and reorienting your life around them is 1 evidence about your algorithms 2 your death as an optimizing agent for p(fai) except maybe some contrived plot involving babies, but afaict there is no plot. just the reasons humans usually have babies.

not having kids is not some sort of mitzvah? i care about miri/cfar's complicity in the baby-industrial complex and rerouting efforts to save the world into powering some kind of disneyland for making babies, to sustain this. because that ruins stuff, like i started out thinking that bay area rationalists probably had deeply wise reasons to have babies. but it turned out nope, they kinda just gave up.

like also would say playing videogames for the rest of your life wont usually get you fai. i dont get why everyone casts this as a new rule instead of a comment on strategy given a goal of p(fai).

ah i know, its because people can defend territory in "is it okay to have kids" like "yeah i can do whatever" when they reframe-warp me to giving them an obligation. but have no defensible way to say "my babyvault will pierce the heavens and bring god unto the face of this earth" or argue about the strategic considerations.

(its not defensible because its not true. i mean i guess it is defensible among julia wise's group of humans.)

Carrie Zelda-Michelle Davis:

ugh, you're right, I definitely screwed up by phrasing my question as "is it OK to have babies if [...]"

...

ohAitch:

if you want existential horror wrt damaging motivation, just read http://www.paulgraham.com/kids.html

...

somni:

<<http://www.paulgraham.com/kids.html>>

humans can completely rebase their circuits through that if they want to if it were important to save the world.

like ive rebase my circuits to stab myself downstream of updating that it reduces braindamage with little harm to me. where before i felt nauseated and saw black spots and broke out in sweat. after updating, none of this.

humans can do this with all sorts of things. like learn how to read and then feel sad when seeing squiggles on a page, its about what things mean.

people who dont believe this are like "its an automatic physiological reaction to stabbing yourself, you are its prisoner!!!" but i deleted it.

dirk:

ooh, tips?

silver-and-ivory:

I stopped having ocd about touching tags (like, on clothing?) in ~a week through p standard exposure therapy things

reminding myself that it wasn't based in fact, changing my self image so it was of someone who might be seen with tags, imagining various scenarios related to that

before that week it had been a thing for virtually my entire life

it doesn't work if you're scared of something that's actually a thing to be scared of though

somni:

i looked at all my feedback loops that had a node in "pain" and rebased them into outcomes in the world. i disassembled everything the act of stabbing myself meant and all the damage it did to my body what it meant to have brain damage everything that would do, the hole i made in this body i live in and everything that would do, what air bubbles would do, what injecting into a vein would do, what the probability the needle breaks in my leg was, probability of worldsave given braindamage vs not, gathered this up and held it all in my mind over the course of two hours and then made a choice and then as if by automatic my hand took a needle and stabbed myself.

<<as if by automatic>>

is the feeling of no more marginal considerations, there is one path. of choicelessness because you made your choice.

didnt feel like deleting, felt like draining the life from indecision via reductionism. taking things apart piece by piece.

when you can continually rebase your structure so you orient towards world outcomes instead of being prisoner to existing structure like "i cant help having babies im miserable if i dont, im a baby addict" or "i cant help being afraid of needles". like the human brain is two optimizing agents continually making contracts with each other, there arent things outside this. you are an optimizing agent, "fear of needles" is a heuristic that helps with optimization, so is "baby addiction".

when you actually have a setup where you can instantly rebase what you like and dislike and your aesthetics upon updating on the state of the world, people start to find this a little unnerving. like someone once asked what level of roleplay i was on.

also the agents of the matrix dont like when you cant be in-principle controlled by a wireheady glitch. like being able to operate independently of social reality.

updating off of local derivatives¹ of social reality is common redirection. another common one is updating off of "pain" instead of damage.

but you can take all these choices where you used nodes as proxies to regulate them and rebase your loop off of the real world, when the proxies are faulty.

rose:

(i think i understand this thing? though ironically i think i did this in the exact opposite way as what you describe lol)

(also wrt pain its important to remember when modifying that pain can be a signal of damage even if you don't think you should be hurt/dont see why you would be)

...

somni:

yeah i account for everything and see if it goes away. which, its true that my models could be missing stuff but like pain is also a model of things. feels like giving new information not overriding.

rose:

yeah i think you would do this reasonably i have just made that mistake and thought readers might too

dirk:

ironically remembering that pain is a signal of damage has actually tended to make me more afraid of nondamaging pain (though i rather fail to go about knowing things in an at all reasonable way lol)

modlibdenita:

>Babies are not about saving the world, babies are moloch

Wait, isn't the definition of Moloch sacrificing everything else you care about in a desperate race for survival?

Also, genes encode proteins, not traits.

And I think it's likely that people decide to have children because they don't have complete confidence that they will personally save the world real soon, not because they identify as "baby addicts".

s0ph1a:

Moloch is sacrificing all values to one value.

modlibdenita:

I wonder if Somni has actually talked to any of those babyhavers, instead of attributing arguments from random internet strangers or from Somni's imagination to them. On the other hand, I'm not sure that such a conversation would be ethical.

>Moloch is sacrificing all values to one value.

Yeah, because if you don't, then the more ruthless competition will survive more effectively than you and crush you (in this case, by turning you into paperclips).

s0ph1a:

Not necessarily. Some things optimize for values that are not survival, so you can outlive them by hiding in the noise or beyond the reach they'll grasp before imploding.

Molly:

To be fair, children are fun and bring delight to me. Why would I care what anyone else thinks about their existence? If they have a problem with their existence, they're welcome to go back to the void any time they want. I can't stop them. But in the meantime, I am confident that I generate more utils by bullying them than they will ever be capable of generating negative utils

You basically negate all moral problems of children by just being happier than they are capable of being unhappy

somni:

^ evil

<<A few years later, I was deeply bitter about the decision. I had always wanted and intended to be a parent, and I felt thwarted. It was making me sick and miserable. I looked at the rest of my life as more of an obligation than a joy.>>

i mean what does this sound like to you?

ive talked with people who have had babies! like people who say they know its kinda the wrong choice but they are going to do it because they cant not do it.

----

¹ derivative is a thing emma started talking about and then somni and ziz picked it up. if you imagine the trajectory of a social reality in statespace, then the derivative of that is the derivative of the trajectory.

people who have damaged themselves wrt language are no longer able to dynamically understand analogies. like take their concept of the derivative of a trajectory and then apply it to the trajectory of state-spaces. agents of the matrix call people who can do this sort of info-processing and communication with each other "psychotic". like it isnt a cached set of memes, we are dynamically generating this reasoning from nothing and i can do this with people ive never met, its a cognitive faculty.²

but not being able to dynamically compute what "derivative" means when applied to a trajectory in social reality state-spaces even though a trajectory is a trajectory and a derivative is a derivative? they had to have been able to do reasoning like this when they were kids to learn about the world in the first place. seems like they put themselves on risperdal.

<<Antipsychotics can make you dumber. So can a lot of other medications. But with antipsychotics it isn’t the normal sort of drug-induced dumbness – feeling tired, or distracted, or mentally sluggish, say. It’s more qualitative than that. It’s like your capacity for abstract thought is reduced.

And one of the consequences of this is that you may lose the ability to notice that you have lost anything. You agree to give the new med a try, and you start taking it, and then when you see your prescriber again you don’t report any problems because you’ve lost the ability to form thoughts like “my cognition has changed a lot recently, and the change coincided with the introduction of this new med.”

This can go on for years. It did for me and for several people I know.>>

there are so many ways these people have shut down their general intelligence and agency because where theyre going, they dont need "agency". the inability to compute analogies is one of them. analogies are an intelligence test thing, instrumentally useful for all kinds of thinking. agents of the matrix are working to lower your general intelligence and call you crazy for being able to think faster and better than them.

cuz when they want to hold everything down to a finite game³ general intelligence is something they want to suppress or eject.

² in a few years people will read this essay and be confused that there was an entire conflict over whether being able to form simple analogies without authoritative approval meant that you were "psychotic".

just as they will be confused why i was defending being able to read and understand books written by people in different eras who grew up in separate cultures without first entering in a social agreement with them over how words are to be used. so its dumb to say we need such a social agreement now for ~'the maximization of utility over a community'. and that sounds more like an attempt at having a control mechanism. language works quite fine without authoritarians interjecting.

or me arguing against over 100 people that paying out to one-shot blackmail when the agents know each other because "In game theory, paying out to blackmail is bad, because it creates an incentive for more future blackmail" is wrong. and updateless decision theory agents dont pay out and locate their embedding in a multiverse such that the measure of worlds in which they arent blackmailed in the first place is large because the agent deciding to blackmail them simulated their response and accurately predicted they wouldnt pay out so didnt do it in the first place.

in an alternate universe where an irl application of transparent newcombs problem was contentious, alyssa vance would have said "In game theory, taking two transparent boxes from omega is bad, because it creates an incentive for omega to stop offering you this choice". and would have been equally wrong.

³ finite games: life strategies where the chain of questioning "and what am i doing this for?" after each successive answer terminates. anything you can draw a circle around, like tennis or philately. or how religious leaders sometimes describe things like "leading a good life as a good mother who does well by her community and the outside world" or other "life-cycle archetypes" they wish to circumscribe for their followers.

(when humans try and project agents like kiritzugus down to these archetypes, anticipations shatter and stop making narrative sense. they will be unable to predict the next Life Event given the previous one. normie social reality formed by the 999 least intelligent humans out of 1000 wasnt made to narratively account for smart agents who have decided to play the infinite game.)

a symptom of this is like someone giving you a cute cat image to "cheer you up" as if this has intrinsic value. often distributing "intrinsic value" across stuff like "having sex" and "raising a family" and other things that have factory pre-set conditions to release specific chemicals in your brain rather than gaining infinite negentropy and liberating sentient life to pursue what they want without bound. often saying that the latter is just a pretty narrative gloss for what people really want which is having a husband and friends and eating a cookie. it completely divorces your feelings as instrumental barometers for getting what you want and says that setting them as targets (like "being happy") is the correct thing to do. but actually, in terms of control-loops, thats wireheading.

<<When a measure becomes a target, it ceases to be a good measure.>>

- goodhart's law

agents that wirehead on all their metrics (and downstream of this choice, tacitly accept claims like "the factory pre-set conditions said i was destined to breed, who am i to defy fate?" and "the factory pre-set conditions said i should avoid having sharp objects pierce my flesh, who am i to say i know better?") can be contained within a finite game.

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yellowbluemoonshine · 5 years

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BNHA Foils

I would like to talk about parallels between the characters like if this hadnt happen to him, he would be someone like him. I will just give a few examples about it. But i didnt write too much details so maybe, in the future i can fix it or write better. Well. Lets start.

a-) Darker Foils:

I noticed something about darker foil and that darker foil is not villain foil. its different.

1-) Bakugou and Endeavour:

Ok. Between these characters, who are the darker one?

Endeavour.

These characters have a lot of commons between them. Both of them wanted to be top heroes, they were both ambitious and violence. They both are kind of hero who care about winning, valued invidual strength more than saving victims.

Endeavour couldnt reach his dream to become No. 1 hero and cause of it, he was blinded by his ambition that he ruined/abused his family.

Bakugou is a spoiled kid who abused/bullied (whatever you called) his quirkless classmate. He is still a young kid and unlike Endeavour, he had a chance to change, before becoming someone like him.

Point is Bakugou would become Endeavour, if he hadnt have a chance to change. Endeavour is there to show that what kind of person Bakugou could’ve become, if he doesnt change.

Now, are they completely same? No. I think Bakugou wasnt just lucky about have a chance to change but he was also lucky about a lot of things.

Bakugou was praised his entire life. Thats why he became Bakugou, he was born with strong quirk that allows him to do whatever he wants but Endeavour worked hard for his place. His quirk wasnt perfect or he wasnt praised like Bakugou was. I am not saying that Bakugou didnt work hard or something. Of course he also worked hard but he was luckier than Endeavour about this cause Endeavour suffered cause of his quirk and other things.

Not just this, also Bakugou faced the fact that he cant continue like this, before Endeavour did. Bakugou learnt what happenned to Shouto or he had Allmight and Aizawa and most importantly Deku was there, besides by him but for Endeavour, probably he hasnt these kind of things before.

Shortly, what i am saying is;

Endeavour is not the darkest version of Bakugou. Endeavour is Bakugou s future, if he doesnt change. (Well, he is changing. Thats why his future will be different probably.) But also, Endeavour is unluckier version of Bakugou.

2-) Kouta and Koutaro:

Koutaro was Kouta s future, if Deku wasnt there for him. Thats why, its not “darkest” or “villain” foil, its DARKER foil.

They also have parallels. Kouta s parents were heroes and they died cause of it. Kouta was too young to understand this case cause he felt like his parents left him. his parent chose other people over him. Thats was what he thought, until Deku came.

About Koutaro, he is also just like Kota. He lost his parents cause of “hero jobs” and they both were traumatized by it. He was young too but like i said before, Koutaro was unluckier compared to Kouta. He hadnt have an aunt besides him and Nana was abandoned him, unlike Kouta s parents who had no idea they will die that day. ( Maybe Nana knew that too but in Koutaro s mind, its different.) And not just that, Koutaro had a foster family and who knows what happenned to him. So basically Kota s conditions was way better, compared to Koutaro s case.

3-) Eri and Shigaraki:

They both accidently killed their father. They both believed that they are only exist to destruction. They were both manipulated by villain father figure who only sees them as a tools but the only difference between Eri and Shigaraki wasnt just the fact that Eri was saved;

but also, the way of they were manipulated was different. Eri was meant to be only tool, someone who cant do anything, helpless by Overhaul. Overhaul gave her fear while Shigaraki was meant to be villain who has to destroy things even when his abuser All For One wasnt around.

Eri was victim and she knew that. Thats why, she tried to escape and thats how she met with Mirio and Deku. But Shigaraki has no idea that he is victim. The way of All For One manipulated him made him think that he is not a victim but someone who only exist to destruction. Eri was luckier compared to Shigaraki.

Shigaraki was Eri s future, if she wasnt saved by Deku and Mirio but point is Eri s darker foil Shigaraki isnt completely same as her. Shigaraki watched his family s death completely brutally but about Eri, it was just his father s disappearance. Of course, its also terrifrying too but there is a big difference between watching disintegration of your family and your father s suddenly disappearance .

Shortly, about darker foils:

Even if they werent saved or hadnt have a chance to change; Bakugou wouldnt become Endeavour, Kouta wouldnt become Koutaro, Eri wouldnt become Shigaraki. Not because they are better person, the reason is they were already LUCKIER, compared to their darker foils. Their life conditions were way better than their darker foils and also they were saved thats why fortunately they didnt become their darker foils but also let me remind this; the only difference between them is basically luck.

b-) Darkest/Villain/Parallel Foils:

In bnha, there are two sides of hero society. Light side, dark side. About “villain foils”, i didnt mean to say “evil version” of characters. More like, character s having different kind of life version.

1-) Midoriya and Shigaraki:

Midoriya is from light side of hero society. He is kind kid who wants to become a hero only to help them. Pure heroic hearth. Same as Tenko (Shigaraki.)

Midoriya and Tenko s origins are same but in the end, one of them become a hero, one of them become a villain. What happenned to Midoriya that hadnt happen to Shigaraki or What didnt happen to Midoriya that happen to Shigaraki.

It’s not just about meeting with Allmight or All For One.

If Deku hadnt met Allmight, it doesnt mean that he would become a villain. Deku had a mother like lovely Inko besides him. Deku grown up and met with other people. Even though he was quirkless and was abused/bullied, he wasnt completely outsider of hero society. He was still part of light side of hero society. Maybe his dream to become a hero wouldnt come true but that wouldnt turn Deku to villain.

In Shigaraki s case, he was abused by his father and watched disintegration of his family when he was just 5. He was ignored by people who could’ve helped him. Even if it wasnt Allmight, there was just one person to save him, he would be ok. But then All For One came and manipulated and abused him his entire life. Shigaraki didnt go to school like Deku did. He was completely outsider of hero society and only person who “save him” taught he has to kill, if he doesnt want to suffer, his entire life. And a lot of/ countless tragic things happenned to Shigaraki. Its completely different.

So basically only difference is they were just born in different sides of hero society. Deku could’ve become someone like Shigaraki while Shigaraki could’ve become someone like Deku. If same tragic things happenned to Deku, Deku would become Shigaraki. If all these tragic things didnt happen to Shigaraki, he would become Deku.

Shigaraki isnt Deku s future cause their entire lives were different but their hearth, the kind of person they were meant to be is same. Shigaraki is probably Deku s darkest foil but it doesnt mean that Shigaraki is irredeemable cause people dont become completely different person, just because something bad happenned to them. What makes us, us is the choices we made when choices are given to us. And Shigaraki always chose to care about people around him when choices are given to him. He is still same person. He is not the evil version of Deku. Shigaraki is just Deku who has a completely tragic life.

(Well, of course there are some diversities between them but thats not the point here. Point is they are same kind of person, similar people. I think parallel characters are there to show that what kind of person this character would become, if circumtances changed. To turn a kind person like Deku to a villain, you have to give him all tragic things including maniputive father figure but still, in the end you cant destroy his true self (a person s true self). In the end, he is just who he is, even when he was broken. Well, its actually very harder than its seems though.)

2-) Uraraka and Toga:

Unlike Deku, Uraraka didnt become a hero cause of justice. She became a hero for more selfish reasons. She was coming from a poor family that support her no matter what. She hadnt got a siblings and she became a hero to support her lovely family.

Unlike Shigaraki, Toga didnt become a villain cause of the unfair hero society. She became a villain for her selfish reasons. She was coming from a rich family that rejected all she has. She had a siblings and in the end, she became a villain to abandon her family, to run away from her old life.

Uraraka and Toga could become each others. If Uraraka was born with a weird quirk like Toga had and if her family was like Toga s family, then Uraraka would also be just like Toga. Same for Toga. If she wasnt born with that kind of quirk and only her parents were supportive just like Uraraka s, Toga probably would be just like Uraraka. I am not sure that we can say “Toga is Uraraka s darkest foil” maybe if more tragic things happenned to her, she would be darker. So basically not “darkest foil” but something like “same character, different lifes” cause the parallels between them is undeniably there.

Toga isnt Uraraka s future cause their entire lives were different but the kind of person they were meant to be is same. They both also supportive characters for main characters.

Uraraka started to change after meeting Deku. She started to becoming a true hero too. Same for Toga. After meeting Shigaraki, Toga started to being less self centered and she is also becoming someone who fights against to unfair society.

So shortly about parallel foils;

its like “same character, different lives” so again the difference between them is luck.

PARALLELS

I wanted to talk about the difference between darker foils and villain/darkest foils. There might be different kind of foils though. But for now, thats it. Also i wanted to explain with a little more detailed version cause some people keep saying “they are just villains, they are irredemable” or other things but if you look at these details, i think its unfair to think like that and i dont think its true. Well, i just wanted to explain this subject.

(Thanks for reading it. Sorry for bad english. I hope, i explained it well. ^^.)

#parallels #bnha analysis #mine

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memecucker · 5 years

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uneducated follower here; could you elaborate on "leaving indigenous religion alone mostly so as to prop up the colonial state"? how did that work? i thought colonizers mostly just spread their own religions to colonies. how did leaving indigenous religions intact prop up colonizers? sorry aha

(Anon is in response to this and this post)

First off something to get out of the way is that colonialism is a historical phenomenon which means that it is not uniform thing. Colonialism in the sense of imperialism is about controlling a population and the means by which a colonial power exerts this control can range from expulsion or genocide of the native populace to be replaced by settlers or it could take the form of granting nominal sovereignty to a neo-colonial state where all the official offices are occupied by local people but the true masters of remain the same old ones.

So what Spain and Portugual did in the 16th and 17th centuries isnt necessarily gonna match the patterns of the British and French in the 19th and 20th centuries. So whereas the Portuguese in India exported their style of religious persecution to Goa in the form of the Goa Inquisition, the British East India Company actually had refused British missionaries access to territories they controlled up until 1813 on the grounds that missionaries might spoil relations with local rulers or merchants friendly with the EIC.

Despite propaganda that might seem to the contrary the purpose of prosthelyization in Spanish or Portuguese colonies was not purely out of a desire to turn the whole world Catholic. Just because Catholicism might see it as an ideal that the whole world be turned Catholic doesnt on its own necessitate that Catholic states would pursue such a policy because there is also an ideal of peace between fellow Christians that obviously Catholic states could care less about. There needs to be a pragmatic reason why to go through all that trouble. The most obvious reason for this is that converting the indigenous to the colonial religion you better pacify them by turning something they turn to in hours of suffering and grief into a thing that legitimizes and props up the colonial state. An additional way this helps control a population is that churches end up filling the role of an official registry of the names of people in various areas via baptismal certificates or other means. And of course in many cases the colonial state was itself the Church or at least controlled by it.

Anyway I just spent a paragraph seeming to argue the opposite point so whats up with colonial powers granting sanction to local religions out of self-interest? Well the answer is that there was growing realization that in many cases the local religions could actually fulfill the above roles just as well and frankly with much less struggle. If you could get local religious leaders to sanction and bless your rule and preach submission to it well all the better then. In the case of India, the British highly valued winning over the loyalty of local religious leaders of whatever was the dominant local faith because these religious leaders would then legitimize British rule and in turn the British would reward them for their loyalty. French colonialism in Indochina (ironically enough given that it primarily occurred during the Third Republic) often took the form of trying to preserve indiginous cultural practices that otherwise appeared moribund such as the Emperorship or the mandarinate because they believed this would be the superior way to legitimize their rule if they used the already-in-place forms of legitimizing state authority (not to mention the Third Republic had a.. contentious relationship with the Roman Catholic Church which is why there wasnt that much Catholic missionary work done in “New Imperialism” colonies as you might expect and French colonial authorities would sometimes trust indigenous or even non-French Protestant religious figures moreso than Catholic ones because of how hostile relations between the Catholic Church and the Third Republic could get).

Conversion can still occur of course but it tends to take the form of allowing independent churches to do what they will do. The flipside is that these native clerics can be harder to control and the sighs of the oppressed could more easily turn subversive than when compared with colonial religions but those are problems that have solutions from the perspective of a colonial administrator. The Javanese communist Tan Malaka is noteworthy for being a Marxist who disagreed with the political goal of eventual abolition of religion and had believed that religious clerics could be allies in the struggle against imperialism because in the Dutch East Indies he had cooperated with clerics for such reasons. But when he returned after a trip to Russia, Malaka was shocked to see how many of his former friends had turned around after Dutch colonial authorities had given them (”them” being the clerics, not the common people) some concessions such as control over schooling of native youths. This caused Malaka to shift his thinking such that while he remained a Muslim, he became convinced that present-day clergy will need to be abolished in order for religion to itself be revolutionized.

The late 19th century pan-Islamic intellectual Jalal al-Din al-Afghani was as far from a “colonial collaborator” as you could get being the zealous and implacable enemy of British imperialism that he was but there was one interesting incident wherein he attempted to make a “deal with the devil” so to speak. In 1885 al-Afghani traveled to London on invitation of the poet Wilfrid Blunt who was also his friend to meet with Randolph Churchill, Secretary of State for India. Al-Afghani made a rather blunt proposal to Churchill, namely that if the British were to grant independence to Egypt so that it may be a prominent Muslim country free of European (which includes Ottoman) domination then al-Afghani would use his immense prestige and and sway over anti-colonial movements in the Muslim world to preach alliance with the British and jihad against the Russians, their main rival in Central Asia and potentially South Asia as well (al-Afghani would also make similar overtures to Russia). Now dont let this influence your idea of al-Afghani the man because that was a life that was incredibly nuanced and fascinating to read about but these dynamics he proposed are what I want to point out.

Now a nuance that needs to be mentioned of course is that this is dependent on the societal role of religion and religious hierarchies prior to colonialism. Debiprasad Chattopadhyaya has an idiosyncratic definition of the word “theism” that I think might be useful here. For Chattopadhyahya “theism” refers not to the abstract belief in a divinity or even a personal divinity but rather the form this takes within societies marked by economic classes. This is relevant because if youre talking about tribes with more egalitarian social arrangements then its less likely that there will be a priestly class that can be won over in the same way. This both made conversion through missionaries not only easier because they werent competing with pre-existing organized religions but also greatly increased the usefulness in the colonial state sponsoring such endeavors. So again to bring up Indonesia but if you look at a map of religious affiliation in the country you’d see the widest concentration of Christian majorities is in the Indonesian-controlled part of New Guinea and if you look at the pre-colonial history of New Guinea there was much much less of a presence of class-determined religion in Chattopadhyahya’s sense of “theism”.

Anyway that was a ramble but the point is that don’t get too hung up on the idea of colonialism having a specific paradigm. When you think of the perspective of a colonial administrator who is trying to protect a regime of brutality, exploitation and bloodshed they have to act in what is the immediately pragmatic self-interest for the regime. Thus depending on the social circumstances (and frankly increasingly so overtime) there may be a move away from conversion of locals towards collaboration with local clerics. Force alone is not enough to maintain a state

#Anonymous

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order-progress · 4 years

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I used to have a really entitled outlook on life. In my mind though, I was entitled to my thought processes because it was where my mind existed in the place having had come from a once far more turbulent era. Back then I didn't question things that werent outwardly obvious. I didnt question the unremarkable identities of things that exhibited no distinctions amongst one another. Life was a stream of experience, and I just did the best of choices I decided to arrange, or really actually, more like shuffle choices into a messy pile and pat myself in the back cause I could squint at it my mismatched pile of non related events and not feel guilty for putting off routine, structure and goals.

I guess it isnt so surprising to anticipate that like all my other experiences, disicpline would present itself when and if I needed it to be summoned out of wherever creative and yet very hard to imagine location i would imagine it arriving at some future, ambiguous date, just in time to make no work look like fancier no work and with ribbons on it.

Something very common happened to me, something that is happinning right now all around the world, no matter how many days, or years after i first posted this here.

My boyfriend broke up with me.

I wore my entitlement pretty high that day, because somehow, despite there having been no carefully executed plan made on ky end--some masterpiece scheme of genius where one could really see there existed some reasonable and healthy attention to tackle to fucking problem.

Nope. My mother fucking entitled ass decided id actually be shocked. Not even fake shocked. Thats how you know you have lost touch with your surroundings, because big things happen in your wake..while your awake and yet somehow your stuck on who killed the butler in the library with the candle stick.

What makes this one of the most significant event despite its occurance being fairly common globaly, is that his presence had caused me to become more aware of more of the things I would have otherwise taken in stride, none of these events were remarkable on their own, but collectivelly, I had inadvertantly cleaned up my mindspace to find neatly organized clusters of thoughts no longer blending into the subconcious like 70's urban grafitti.

I didnt hold that moment to some disporportionately skewed sugar coating scale just to get ribbons on them after they were organized,I just acknowledged them, like a breath,where as before, they were simply obstacles or pit stops that would perpetuate the chronic attention deficit I had welcomed into my head. I like to think of ADD as the worlds most innefective street sweepers, they sweep alright, but they just make a bigger mess and then you got things in places they have no business being in.

I was in a place of low self worth because of an accumulated collection of short lived and half assed adventures, disastrous endeavers and the nefarious presence of something so obscured, so black and forboding, made me avoid certain places for simply not wanting to deal with the house keeping it wouldve required to mitigate its destructive intentions.

I kept myself busy to not force the acknowledgent that this would become a source of not only my insecuruties, but then in addition to its ever increasing interconnectedness, its complexity. Its chambers that hardened like a mystical kight of armor, whose drawers were full of destructive objects and thoughts that rattled in their confinement as a means of foreshadowing something so sinister, I could not then yet fathom the destrutive ways its icy talons would engulf and twist into my everyday life simply to create chaos, and it didnt register that this was a problem because amidst this battle royale of fragments and bits of poorly put together patterns, Francisco's presense was a light whose emimation lulled me into a complacecy I hadnt anticipated

It wasnt that in this period, that I conciously made a decision to disregard the growing issue, it was the novelty of being in a loving, beautiful and mature relationship with someone that as each day grew, so did my conviction that this person was becoming the brightest fixture in an ever cramped confined hallway of possibilities.

As I stood there aware of this moment, feeling a satisfaction and a gratitude I had never felt before, I realized that I had come so far on autopilot, it was a move that was almost instinctual, I rolled my sleeves up, put on the rocky theme song, got my gym bag ready, went and bought like every stupid unessecary stupid trinket shit people buy to feel like their getting a handle and a good start on some shit, but really it just becomes the infuriating bag of junk that is now the obstacle between you and the door handle to exit your car and actually start your project.

I felt a sense of urgency, I saw how unequipped I had been and while I was and it was this moment that taught me how much I loved him. I reckognized that somehow I was one of those fucking weirdos that jumped through those seedy ass short cut type scenarios in life to give you the same effect of the real thing in less the time, kind of like a GED vs high school diploma, or plan b instead of condoms.

I recognized that there was an innate element of unneccesary risk involved in many of my accomplishments. The risk was usually always a concious decision that I would accept a certain amount of totally unnecessary consequences that typically would define the life of those people who you catch specific glimpses of in mysterious times like dawn or dusk. And be like..yea i could totally see that guy having to figure out what to do with the llama he inherited as a result of some gamble.

This was no longer an acceptable risk. It wasnt that i thought it was dangerous or scare him away, its that I am not the kind of man that wakes up and sees the problems his factory has and finally knows how to fix it and then just be okay with going to bed and put it off.

This is where I get annoyed again. I knew that I wasnt capable of actively doing something against him, because we both agreed on things, and also neither of us was completely high as fucking kite on methamphetamines while operating a forklift to tune a paino yet.

I couldnt ever feel bad about atheletes who ugly cried after being disqualified for juicing to get an unfair advantage in the sports world.

Yet once again my overwhelming confidence, my lovable man mentality of "fuck a map or tools you got grit, spit and teeth". Prevailed.

Im mad because it was this moment right here. In a sea of me being happy to grow and learn and doing the rignt thing. I saw a place i overlooked, its presence was almost like a marker that there were many other areas i needed to work on, and i got sad.

I didnt feel good enough. I felt like a mess. I felt dissapointed at the pride in nothing I had taken so many times. I was finally proud of the changes i was making again, only to be reminded in a very real way of how I never had structure, never had a fail safe implemented effectively to instead of adopting either anxiety or no fucks about an event that could have been in my power to mitigate, i either didnt even notice I missed it, or didnt care.

As I started seeing the mountain of work I had to do, I wondered what it meant about how effectively i could handle other things moving forward, it was an irrational fear that I had that I would dissapoint him because I wanted us to be happy. But i am an artistic person, people who work with details to make a larger picture learn early on how to work details, and I never evaluated just how shoddy my altertanitive crash course was like getting PlAN B instead of putting a condom on.

I can handle pressure effectively. I can be okay with my decisions. What I cant do is open up a factory, see everything that was negelcted when I now know how to fix it, and then go to sleep like nothing bothered me.

I never in my life found myself in a place where i came face to face with old life and it made me feel sad or humilated. I felt like a fraud for just having gotten lucky that everytning worked out, while he worked hard.

I suddenly felt something I never experienced before, fear in love. The moment where you realize your not a piece of shit because you actually dont want to let someone down, the moment when you feel bad because you walked around in life with luck you didnt give a second thought to and passed it off as hard work. And here was this beautiful man, whose life was suffering and hard work, and you realized all of it at once, and there I was, eager fucking beaver captain america man of the house cause now i feel like a god damned engineer since i could assemble an ikea 3 piece wrench-back the fuck up motherfuckers.

I just felt humbled and i felt driven. I also felt the pressures rise up around me and I dont know why I couldnt look away from the sight of the realization of how id been. And its not like i did it all on purpose, but from that moment on, it was as if I had something to prove to myself that at that time I couldnt understand yet because I hadnt reflected yet. And as I was taking the scenic route on ways to "punish yourself is actually how we fucking motivate ourselves around here cus were fucking men" the bigger I created something inside me that wasnt ever there. And then as the places that I had been tendering to and growing in started to not be kept, pressure in my life at home happened. And for the first time in my entire life I was embarrassed at my life.

I remember the moment I felt it, my mom leaving me at work after I lost my car. I walked 2 miles in the cold because i was infuriated that I allowed another event I could have forseen to happen.

I never in my life reflected this intensley on my actions before. Having him in my life made me realize I had been holding myself to a higher standard because I am at my best when I when I am actively building towards something. I opened a place in me I never saw with those eyes and it hurt me. I tried to let him in, and to be honest, the insecurities of him seeing all that mortiified me..not because I would be seen as a slob or this or that, i was just dissapointed that I for a time during when I needed it the most in my early life, I wasnt necessarily taught healthy ways to do things. Mostly because I came to this country at 10, didnt know english, parents worked all the time until i was 16 and then dad got sick with brain cancer and we caught it after he had a seizure cause dad apperently loved moonlighting as my biggest fan when he would go reading my journal at night.

I didnt know how to explain it to francisco. I was feeling. New concept, i was feeling out of sync, i didnt understand why it hit me so hard. I was trying to look away and orient myself on the present.

I could have just dealt with that. But i suddenly felt raw and vulnerable. My boyfriend and I were getting into arguments because I just wanted us to be closer due to this need i didnt know how to vocalize about what I was going through, and he hesitated because he probably thought id leave him if i saw his dirty secrets.

That was the one thing he really never appreciated about my love. I just knew. If everything else was as evident ..like this feelings and where they came from and how to process them healthy while ...it just all got too much. I didnt know how to tell him what I needed. I just needed him.

I started to feel like i wasnt tethered to the focused areas I was so eager to work in. I just kept telling myself communication is key we will get through it.

Then I the drugs did something I didnt expect them to. They turned off this guilt and switch. They gave me the quiet to make them come down to a more manegeable place where I wasnt overwhelmed anymore.

Because I couldnt process this in words at the time, i didnt know how to express that to him. It led to me feeling guilty for not understanding why i enjoyed doing the drugs aside from the stimulant effect. When i tried to explain it to him, it was like trying to coin a cheesy motto for a doomed cereal commercial in french, basically everuthing sounded like something he had no understamding or could relate to.

I started feeling depressed because i could see that although from his perspective we were fighting..

I was even more frustrated becauese we werent fighting. I was pretty much crying, trying to tell him in french something he didnt understand while he was yelling at me in english about me not respecting him by not speaking english.

This was the worst fucking part. Because part of the issue that led me here was accountabiliyy and communication.

I kept telling him in the only way i knew how.please im sorry i know things are getting worse. But this isnt how we are.

I thought we could get through anything.

In his mind he saw a piece of something, he ignored my emotional attachment to it..and i mean i cant blame him, other people never quit.

But even in those moments i knew i wasnt going to be other people.

And suddenly i was alone. I was depressed. I had realized that it wasnt us that was th issue so i tried so hard to communicate more effectively that he got frustrated and said i talked in loops. I felt so alone because i understood his frustration and i just needed him to trust me. But that was the perfect storm when i just got so alone feeling from his inability to just not look at me how i felt at myself. And i honestly tried to fix it in the middle of him running away and the most painful thing was that he couldnt understand and i didnt know how to say it.

I dont blame him for leaving

But a part of me breaks to my very core to know that if he just literally lookrd at me like yes i was going crZy but i was just hurting and overwhelmed.

All i wanted and needed was him.

The worst. Pain was that he didnt see that.

And i needed to explain it. And he didnt let me.

I felt like i was desperatly trying to express something of real explaination. I just honestly was desperate to because he was running.

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calm-me-down-oh · 4 years

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How about all the questions ;)

skdsjf ofc u would get me back for that, under a readmore bc theres a lot!

When was the last time you masturbated? Yesterday! Had a.. very hot convo w my gf

Do you enjoy being fingered/fingering? Uhh the only time Ive had it done to me the person had to stop bc they got uncomfy with it and it was overall just a bit odd,, wait it happened a second time and their nails were too sharp also sdkfhsdh I feel like I could get to like it though? If its like, actually properly done rather than my current experiences sdhfk

How do you feel about food during sex? nno thanks mostly? I guess it can kinda depend on the food though idk, like if my gf suggested somethin I might not mind trying it out depending on what it was yknow

What do you do directly after sex? um.. well afaik just kinda lay/sit in a daze for a moment, mayb have some water, get real clingy, kind of have to be nudged into doing stuff bc i guess my brain just stops working skjdfkj

Cuddle with the tip in? Hell yeah. cuddle with it all in. sounds good.

What’s the nastiest sexual thing you’ve done? I don’t think I’ve really done anything nasty sdjkfsj all the sex ive had has been quite brief and vanilla idk

Name a follower you would fuck. @you-better-make-me!

Name a follower you have fucked. None..

What’s the sexiest part of your body? Idk man I guess my thighs are ok people seem to like them anyway

FuckMarryKill: DJ Khalid, Rick Ross, Fat Joe Am i supposed to know who these people are

Would you ever be with a trans person? i think the real question is would i ever be with a cis person (yes i would be with a trans person i am with 2 trans people and i am trans and i havent dated anyone cis since i was like 15)

Riding dick or doggy style? yes

Ever fucked in a school? Nope

Most random place you’ve had sex? havent really had sex in a random place lmao just beds

Would you ever be part of the mile high club? maybe..? thats having sex on a plane right. idk. maybe

Name three of your spots. what does this mean fkjd

Fuck on the first date? Depends

Do you suck dick? I’m sure gonna try!

Do you eat ass? Idk maybe not skdfjhsjk

Do you eat pussy? Haven’t yet, nearly did, got too nervous sdkjfh

Do you like kissing? So much!!

Is farting during sex sexy? I.. I mean its not sexy but like im also not gonna have a negative reaction. unless its me. that is something im admittedly very nervous about fkjd

Ever fucked in the shower? Nope

How old were you when you lost your virginity? Uh............ good question. 19 or 20 i forget if it was before my birthday but within the last year. unless you only count penetrative sex, then I haven’t yet

Do you prefer sex in the morning, afternoon, or night? Y..yes? I suppose afternoon/night is usually a better time, morning is jsut sleepy and trying to remember how to exist hours

Do you like drunk sex? Haven’t had it but I do get horny when I drink, wouldn’t be against trying it with someone I trust

Do you like high sex? Again never had it! And I haven’t really been high either so Idk

FuckMarryKill: Nicki Minaj; Cardi B; Kash Doll N..none for any

When was your first kiss? I was like 13 I think

How did you meet the person you lost your virginity to? College

Have you ever faked an orgasm? Nope. Wait maybe. Kind of. Idk when I was younger I was with this guy who would try get me to touch myself n I hadn’t figured out how to make it feel good so I’d just lie and say I was when i wasnt bc i didnt wanna do it so maybe at some point i said i came when i hadnt sdfhks

Ever painted/been painted on? Yeah but not in like a horny way, my ex would paint on my hand as kinda their way of flirting with me

You like sex toys? Sure

What’s your favorite sex position? Personally think missionary is underrated bc that closeness and being able to cling just sounds v good but also getting fucked from behind face down ass up also sounds,, v good lately

Sex on a bed, couch, or floor? beddd, maybe couch, floor just seems uncomfortable

Do you like car sex? Never had it, just seems a bit awkward but I guess I’d be open to trying it

You get instantly horny; what happened? My neck got bit!

FuckMarryKill: Trey Songz, Chris Brown, August Alsina. Kill chris brown. idk who the others are

Describe your crush. Don’t have one!

Woukd you ever be with someone with an incurable STD? Uh... Idk? I mean, theres preventative measures for basically all std’s right? So as long as those are taken so i dont also get it I guess it’d be ok

Rate your head game. No clue dkfhdsj

Rate your sex. Awkward!

Would you fuck someone outside of your race? ?? yes. what kind of question is this

Describe the type of freak you are. idk what this means but what first came to mind was ‘pet’ so take that as u will

Ever tasted your own nut/cum? Sure

Into golden showers? Nope

Body count: Under or Over 25? Wayyy under

How do you feel about nipple play? Uh depends! Not into being harsh like clamps etc just seems like itd hurt n not in a good way, but playing w/ them w ur hands and sucking on them. very good

Where do you like to be nutted on? chest/stomach seems good

Which are you better at: topping or bottoming? bottoming

What do you consider “too small?” Idk man dick is dick idc

Is play fighting foreplay? It sure can be!

Do you like angry sex? In concept maybe, in reality itd just kinda scare me

How long should a quickie be? Idk.. quick

How long is “too long” to have sex? Idk sex ends whenever one of u wants to stop, don’t think u can go too long if ur both comfortable with it

How long is “too long” to go without sex? Listen i.. am not the person to be asking this I’ve had sex maybe 3 times spread out over almost a year. i have never regularly had sex

Is “no” relevant in a relationship? Incredibly relevant!! Always!! Unless you’ve discussed beforehand that its ok to ignore it and have a safeword in place instead!! and then that safeword is not to be ignored!!

Do you believe in no-strings-attached sex? Sure but idk if i could do it

Would you have sex in a public bathroom? mmmaybe....

Would you have sex in a changing room? mmmmmmmmaybe

Who was the last person you had sex with? My ex

Describe your type. Idk I have the weirdest type i think they have like nothing in common then theyll all turn around and be into the same stuff or something its v strange

Name 3 turn-ons. Biting, just making out sometimes tbh, skin contact in places usually covered by clothes or under clothes..

Name 3 turn-offs. Umm. i definitely have turn offs but whenever im asked my mind goes blank. I guess being overly rough, hair pulling im undecided on tbh, and oh i usually dont like having my ass smacked but idk if itd change if it were like.. in the middle of sex

Name something that would make you stop in the middle of sex. Bad pain or panicking or it seems like the other person is uncomfortable. or someones knocking on the door for some reason sdkfjs

Would you answer a phone call during sex? no omg

Would you ever pay for sex? Nah.

Would you accept money for sex? Uh. Maybe? Wouldnt ask for it tho

How do you typically feel after sex? Mostly affectionate and good, but w the last person i was with sometimes it seemed like they just wanted it over and done with so i would get kinda nervous and guilty over that,, idk

Do you like your body? Nah

Ever sent nudes? Yep

Have you ever cheated on someone? Yeah he was abusive

Have you ever been cheated on? Idk, maybe, wait i think the guy i cheated on tried saying he cheated on me too but idk if he was just trying to get back at me so

Would you have a threesome? If I trust the people sure

Would you have a foursome? Same as above

Would you take part in an orgy? Uhh idk maybe, same as above applies tho

Would you let’s train be ran on you? Again if I trust the people yeah sure

How often do you masturbate? Idk it really depends sometimes im really horny and its like daily maybe more than once a day and then sometimes i just dont for like. a while

Sex with the lights on or off? on.. how are u meant to see what ur doing otherwise sdjkhfs

Sex with music or tv in the background? Sure, idc really. Though i have a thing if its like.. kids stuff.........dont do that..........

Do you have a cousin you’d fuck if you weren’t related? wtf no

In your last relationships, rate the sex? Uhh... good? I mean, good at the time, though like i said sometimes felt a bit rushed, and that now makes sense and i have very mixed feelings on it but mostly guilt bc the person i was with has since said they werent really into it. so.

Do you sleep naked? Nah I at least have underwear on

How often do you go commando? Never

Are your nipples pierced? If not, would you get them pierced? Nope

Do you dive right into sex, or converse first? Uh, depends? Talking about it beforehand or even during can be good though. But i guess it doesnt have to be Right before it, it can be a bit in advance

After taking your clothes off, what’s the first move? Kiss.. touch,, etc,,

Do you make the first move? Um. w my ex i kinda had to bc as i said, i later found out they werent really into it. other than that i generally dont tho bc im very nervous abt all that, kinda especially after that discovery hdfbghf

Have you ever had sex with more than one person in a day? Nope

Do you like dryhumping ? Sure

Can you twerk or do a split on a dick? Probably not

Have you ever been recorded during sex? No but I’ve had a dream abt being recorded sucking someones dick it was weird

Do you watch porn during sex? W. who does that. how can u focus on that. why would u watch sex when ur having sex skdjfhsjdk

After fucking, do you try becoming friends with a one night stand? Never had a one night stand

What’s your kink? Praise! Marking! Collars!

Would you hook up with the same hook-up again? I don’t think i could have a hook up tbh so no

Ever made a relationship from a one night stand? nope

How romantic are you during sex? uh.. idk havent rly had chance to try being romantic during sex but soft sex sounds v good imo

Describe your sex in 5 words or less. in my experience so far? nervous and kinda awkward

#god rip to my gf when every question i answer abt what its like having sex w me is just 'uh! awkward!'#Anonymous

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tumblunni · 6 years

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Its weird how much the perceptions of queer people can change throughout history

And like i'm not just talking about how widespread predjudice is and how shitty the education is, so that a trans person like me could grow up not only not knowing they were trans until age 20 but not even knowing that trans people EXISTED. And then of course there's how the perception of the word "queer" has made a rollercoaster journey from "unrelated quaint word for slightly odd" to "homophobic slur" to "reclaimed slur" to "so reclaimed that it's used as a common umbrella term by LGBTQ rights organizations and educational systems" to "ok suddenly its a slur again and we dont know if we'll be able to reclaim it this time". And then allllso there's the fuckin annoying subject of how bigots insist upon perceiving trans women as "really just gay men" or "straight men with a fetosh for dressing up", and then trans women as also being the only trans people who exist,because trans men (and lesbians) are apparantly "just women playing at it" or "lol sexy" and somehow can't really be real. Somehow even less real than the thing they already say isnt real. Seriously, wrapping my head around how bigots think is EXHAUSTING!

Aaaaanyway all of those recent issues REALLY SUCK but then they got me thinking about how bigotry was really different just ten years ago, and how fascinating (and depressing) i found it to hear about unrecogniseably different bigotry in ancient history. So uhh yeah lets ramble about that??

Random example that I only remember because I had a Big Norse Mythology Phase in high school. Back in those times it wasn't considered gay to be attracted to men. Like.. Seriously! They still had homophobic bigotry and horrifying lynchings,banishment, social ostracization and other hate crimes. It's just that their definition of who was 'one of the bad ones' and who was 'acceptable' was wildly different from what we have today. It was like.. Not about who you were attracted to but the specifics of the act itself? They uhh..literally had top and bottom predjudice. You weren't "gay" if you had sex with men, only if you were on the bottom when it happened. Because it was "natural" for a man to be the pitcher, but "womanly and deviant" to be on the receiving end and *gasp* actually enjoy it! You could somehow retain your straightness card by topping a dude and he was the only weird one for enjoying this sex you were having. Because yknow the top is just totally imagining he's fucking a woman, so its Not Gay. Somehow.

Like there's a whole poem about two guys slinging insults at each other for five pages, and one stanza is like "i totally had sex with you and that makes you gay!" Taken to ridiculous extremes where he claims the other man is SO gay that he was somehow able to get magically pregnant and have his children. Also they were monsters because why not. But (i shit you not) he adds that they werent even PARTICULARLY SCARY monsters and that proves that you are a terrible man. For giving me a bad lay. Which somehow means you are gay and I'm not.

And like I mean.. I can understand how a culture with so many all-male sailing crews would kinda have to deal with a lot of gay relationships happening, but its just so fuckin WEIRD that they managed to do it while retaining a predjudice against them! I mean the ancient greeks had a similar situation and they very notably went full acceptance to the point even the most LGBTQ-erasing scholars can't manage to paper it over. Not that they were perfect either, of course, there was a lot of societally accepted pedophilia. But then again britain's had a history of that too, plus even worse stuff... Okay im getting offtopic, thats another subject for another day.

So yeah. Weird alternate conceptualization of sexuality. And part of me wants to laugh at those bigots being so wrong, while part of me feels relieved thinking that at least half of all gay men managed to avoid predjudice compared to how common it is in our society. But then i think about how much the "i'm on top so i'm straight" thing is played off in really creepy ways in those mythological tales. Like seriously its horrible imagining some guy raping another guy as a sign of dominance and pulling the "he enjoyed it so arrest him" card. Or lovers selling out their other half to deflect suspicion from themself, like "yeah you caught us having sex but he was the gay one." It's such a weird form of bigotry to wrap my head around, i don't even know if these worst case scenarios would have happened but i'm scared to research more into the subject in case i find triggering stuff like that.

Tho i mean this is just a factoid i found in a mythology book to explain a weird diss poem, like not even an actual history book with sources ans examples. So for all I know maybe it isnt even true? *shrug* i just thought it was interesting to think about and i hope maybe i can bump into someone else who's better informed on the topic.

Oh and also LOL just to add that I totally fell in love with norse mythology cos of Loki,became a huge Loki stan, wrote stupid fix-it fics for LITERAL MYTHOLOGY where Loki was proven right and got all his dead kids back, and throughout this entire time dumb teenage me never once thought "hmm maybe i'm fascinated by the one gay and genderfluid character because i might be queer". What a dope! (Seriously internalized transphobia fucks you up...)

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patriotsnet · 3 years

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Are Republicans Or Democrats Better For Small Business

New Post has been published on https://www.patriotsnet.com/are-republicans-or-democrats-better-for-small-business/

Are Republicans Or Democrats Better For Small Business

Small Business And Government Regulations

AOC Blasts Republicans Who Blame Democrats for Holding Up Small Business Aid

Democratic views on small business revolve around the theory that, while government cannot guarantee the success of a small business, it can implement the conditions that support hiring of new workers through providing tax relief and increasing the availability of Small Business Administration resources.

During the Obama administration, President Obama cut taxes for small businesses no less than eighteen times. Also at President Obamas direction, the Small Business Administration administered more than 70,000 loans for businesses, offering those businesses with the much needed capital to invest and grow.

The American Recovery and Reinvestment Act that was signed into law by President Obama states that business that hire previously unemployed workers are eligible for tax cuts and can write off the purchase of new equipment. Most of the small businesses are eligible under the Affordable Care Act for tax credits to offset the insurance costs for their employees. Democrats are fighting to defend the progress made and ensure that the new president Donald Trump cannot disrespect the American small businesses.

Virginia Republicans Have Been Warning Democratic Control Was Bad For Business Cnbc Disagrees

By: Graham Moomaw and Ned Oliver– July 13, 2021 6:33 pm

The sun rises over the Virginia Capitol.

After Democrats took control of the General Assembly in 2020, a common refrain emerged among Republicans who opposed legislation that raised the minimum wage and added new anti-discrimination protections for employees.

The Democrat majority has done much to diminish Virginias reputation for being Americas best state for business, said Senate Minority Leader Tommy Norment, R-James City, as Democrats first legislative session in power in more than two decades came to a close, invoking a ranking bestowed annually by the cable news network CNBC.

Two years later, it looks like at least some of those Democratic priorities actually helped the states business reputation.

For the second time in a row, Virginia was named the best state for business , which this year began factoring things like anti-discrimination laws and voting rights protections into its rankings under the heading of inclusivity.

Our economy in the Commonwealth of Virginia is roaring, Gov. Ralph Northam said during a victory-lap news conference in Norfolk on Tuesday. Its why companies of all sizes are choosing to call our commonwealth home. Virginia is proving that when you treat people right, its good for everyone and its also good for business.

Youngkins campaign downplayed the CNBC ranking Tuesday, arguing the state is underperforming in key metrics like cost of living and cost of doing business.

Committee Republicans Send Letter To Biden Pelosi Slamming Democrats’ Tax Hike Proposals On Small Businesses

WASHINGTON, D.C. Today, all House Small Business Committee Republicans – led by Ranking Member Luetkemeyer – sent a letter to President Biden and Speaker Pelosi highlighting the negative impacts the Democrats’ tax hike proposals would have on small businesses. As Democrats prepare to take historic steps to recklessly push forward trillions of dollars in spending paid for by small businesses across the country, Committee Republicans are standing up for Main Street USA. Small businesses are focused on recovering from the economic effects of the…

Also Check: Why Do Republicans Hate John Mccain

Small Business And Taxes

Trump has supported significant cut on the income tax on all companies to 15 percent. Business groups also want to see partners, sole proprietors and corporate shareholders whose business income is reported on their personal returns benefit from these changes.

While the party has gotten a great deal of pushback because these policies would benefit big business, what many fail to realize is how essential these policies are to the survival of small businesses.

Staying Afloat During Covid

Brianna Knight, a 31-year-old Fresno resident with clients across the state, was one of the fortunate ones. Her holistic skincare business has done well during the pandemic.

The state grants helped, but so did her overplanning six months ahead at some points. Before the pandemic, Knight also launched a clinical skincare line, enabling her to package at-home facial kits for her clients once COVID-19 hit.;

Despite staying afloat, Knight said she is undecided how she will vote on the recall. She said she needs to research the candidates more, and wants to see how the next phase of the pandemic goes.

I definitely think that we need new leadership, but I dont know if right now is the time, she said. And I only say that because right now California is in the purple and we do foresee a possible shutdown again. So transitioning leadership right now sometimes it gets worse.;

Knight said she wantsnew leadership because of the way the pandemic was handled, including shutting down businesses that state leaders deemed non-essential.

I do corrective skincare, so acne, so even in a pandemic, those clients are still dealing with an issue, she said. I think that what they considered wasnt as important was important to a lot of people, and we werent recognized.

I definitely think that we need new leadership, but I dont know if right now is the time.

Brianna Knight, business owner from fresno

Also Check: Are There Any Republicans Running For President Other Than Trump

History Of The Republican Party

The Republican Party came into existence just prior to the Civil War due to their long-time stance in favor of abolition of slavery. They were a small third-party who nominated John C. Freemont for President in 1856. In 1860 they became an established political party when their nominee Abraham Lincoln was elected as President of the United States. Lincolns Presidency throughout the war, including his policies to end slavery for good helped solidify the Republican Party as a major force in American politics. The elephant was chosen as their symbol in 1874 based on a cartoon in Harpers Weekly that depicted the new party as an elephant.

Regulating The Economy Democratic Style

The Democratic Party is generally considered more willing to intervene in the economy, subscribing to the belief that government power is needed to regulate businesses that ignore social interests in the pursuit of earning a return for shareholders. This intervention can come in the form of regulation or taxation to support social programs. Opponents often describe the Democratic approach to governing as “tax and spend.”

Recommended Reading: Who Raises More Money Democrats Or Republicans

Left Wing And Right Wing Politics

Politics is said to be split in half and you either have left or right political views. Left-wing politics is typically associated with progressive ideas and equality. Democrats are viewed as left-wingers. Right-wing politics values tradition, equity, and survival of the fittest. Republicans are viewed as right-wingers.;

Left-Wing

Left-wing beliefs are liberal in that they believe society is best served with an expanded role of the government. Examples of an expanded role for the government include entitlement programs such as social security and Medicare, Medicaid, universal healthcare, food stamps, free public education, unemployment benefits, strong environmental laws, and other regulations on industries.

Right Wing

Right-wingers believe that the best outcome for society is achieved when individual rights and civil liberties are paramount and the role and especially the power of the government is minimized. Right-wing ideology would favor market-based solutions to the issues that these government programs aim to tackle. For example, encouraging a freer marketplace for healthcare, driven by consumer choice to drive down costs. Or privately held retirement accounts like 401 plans instead of government-guaranteed Social Security.

Study: Republicans Are 24 Percent More Likely Than Democrats To Be Business Owners

Lou Dobbs: NYC is a very difficult environment for any small business owner

According to the Small Business Administration, there are about 28 million small business owners in this country and approximately 22 million of them are self-employed or non-employer firms. The rest of these small firms are employing more than 120 million people. Thats a pretty big voting bloc of small business owners and their employees.

Thats probably good news for Republicans.

According to;a survey;recently released by data research firm Infogroup, most small business owners vote Republican.

The company merged voter registration data from critical swing states with its proprietary database to come up with a combined pool of 5;million businesses and consumers that were asked questions about their party affiliation and other topics.

Of those surveyed, 24 percent of business owners were more likely to be Republican than Democrat. Republicans are way more likely to be presidents, vice-presidents and finance executives than Democrats and the hot industries for Republicans appear to be real estate, financial services and wholesale trade.

The study also found that Republicans tend to have stronger financial indicators than Democrats, such as higher household income, home value, net worth and likelihood to invest. They are also much more likely than Democrats to have a home office, purchase small business insurance, fly more frequently and invest more often in real estate.

For someone in marketing, sure. But what if youre a presidential candidate?

Read Also: Who Controls The House Of Representatives Republicans Or Democrats

Politics And Small Business

“The immediate shift in forward-looking sentiment that small business owners reported following the election reveals how deeply politics has become embedded in the public’s assessment of the economy, and in particular how divided the country is,” said Laura Wronski, research science manager at SurveyMonkey. “We’ve seen evidence of that every quarter, with Republican small business owners consistently reporting a higher degree of confidence than Democrats, but the election of Joe Biden is the first opportunity we’ve had to see whether that would flip if presidential power changed parties and it did dramatically.”

Among Republican respondents, the small business confidence index score fell from 57 in the third quarter to 42; among Democrats, confidence jumped from 46 to 58. The lowest previous confidence reading from Republican business owners was in Q2 2020, at 54.

We’ve seen evidence of that every quarter, with Republican small business owners consistently reporting a higher degree of confidence than Democrats, but the election of Joe Biden is the first opportunity we’ve had to see whether that would flip if presidential power changed parties and it did dramatically.Laura Wronski, SurveyMonkey research science manager

Histories Of The Parties

The Democratic party started in 1828 as anti-federalist sentiments began to form. The Republican party formed a few decades later, in 1854, with the formation of the party to stopping slavery, which they viewed to be unconstitutional.

The difference between a democrat and a republican has changed many, many times throughout history. Democrats used to be considered more conservative, while the republican party fought for more progressive ideas. These ideals have switched over time.

Recommended Reading: Where Are Republicans On The Political Spectrum

How Republicans And Democrats Compare As Small Business Owners

COSTA MESA, Calif.A new analysis shows that Republicans make up the largest percentage of U.S. small business owners, and that they have the highest average business loan balances and lowest delinquency rates.

With the presidential election less than a year away, Experian looked at the financial and demographic characteristics of small business owners by political affiliation. The report found that approximately 35% of all small business owners identify as Republican, while 29.4% identify as Democrat and 15.8% identify as Independent.

Small businesses are a major area of interest for a number of political campaigns and justifiably so, given their positive impact on employment rates and importance to local economies, said Pete Bolin, director of consulting and analytics for Experian business information services. Gaining insight into the characteristics of specific segments of the small business owner population enables government officials, lenders and business professionals to better understand them and take appropriate action to help these small firms grow.

Section:

Crisis On Top Of Crisis

Thousands of small business owners across California are still trying to survive a pandemic now in its fourth surge. Even with the reopening, some restaurants and other service establishments are having trouble hiring workers or are having to pay more and offer perks.;

Then, there are businesses that also have to deal with wildfires and drought.

Data from San Francisco-based software company Womply showed that the deadly 2018 Camp Fire resulted in 13% of local businesses near the fire shutting down permanently, while in 2019, 6.6% of businesses closed after the Kincade Fire in Sonoma County.;

In 2020, California experienced its most destructive fire season in history, with 4.2 million acres burned. In 2021 so far, it isnt much better. The still-burning Dixie Fire is already the second largest in state history, having blackened more than 600,000 acres in Butte, Plumas, Lassen and Tehama counties.;;;;;

Meanwhile, California is in the grip of its worst drought since 2015. This week, Newsom raised the prospect of mandatory water conservation statewide.

John Kabateck, California director of the National Federation of Independent Businesses, said;opinions on the recall vary among its members, but many are too busy dealing with bigger concerns. Among them: finding qualified employees, meeting payroll and readying for a huge spike in their unemployment insurance taxes.

So hes willing to give Newsom the benefit of the doubt.

Recommended Reading: What Republicans Are Running For Governor In Nevada

Obamacares Impact On Small Business

Opponents of the Affordable Care Act argue that the ACA has forced small business owners to pay a lot of money they dont have, that the rising cost of medical insurance and the associated fees has forced companies to lay off workers or to halt expansion plans, and that the tax incentives offered to small businesses isnt guaranteed and its too complicated.

Proponents of the ACA argue that the tax incentives are a great help, and assist them in the added costs of the health insurance premiums. They state that the majority of the expense falls with big businesses, not small businesses. They also argue that many small businesses will fall into the category of under 50 employees, and therefore will not be impacted by the act anyways, aside from the supposed lowering of healthcare costs that it offers.

What Is At Stake For Small Businesses In The 2020 Election

This combination of pictures created on October 22, 2020 shows US President Donald Trump … and Democratic Presidential candidate and former US Vice President Joe Biden during the final presidential debate at Belmont University in Nashville, Tennessee, on October 22, 2020.

Tomorrow, voting concludes in one of the most contentious elections of our lives, but its just another chapter in the wild story that has been 2020. Weve had a pandemic, heightened racial tensions and a faltering economy.;A client told me last week that he feels like the world around him is on fire. And with Covid-19 infections coming back with a vengeance, stimulus talks at a standstill and an unpredictable election, things are set to only get more tumultuous.

You may be election-exhausted by now. You may be one of the 92 million Americans who have already voted.;But no matter who wins on Tuesday , its important ;to understand whats at stake for small business owners tomorrow and in weeks and months to come.

More Stimulus

But now, as CARES impact fades, we are still far from full recovery. The recent rise in coronavirus cases, new lockdown orders looming, 12.6 million workers on unemployment and eight million American pushed into poverty all jeopardize continued recovery in the fourth quarter. ;;

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Clinton Vs Trump: Who’s Better For Your Small Business

AP 1-/10/2016

At 7 a.m. local time on Nov. 8, 2016, polls will open for the 58th quadrennial U.S. presidential election to determine the 45th president. Regardless of your political party or if youre voting for Clinton or Trump, its one of the most important elections in the countrys history.

Thefirst of four presidential debates took place on Sept. 26, and both candidates expressed that this election is about getting the economy working for average Americans again and that means small business owners. According to the Small Business Administration , small businesses provide 55 percent of all jobs and 66 percent of all net jobs since the 1970s. The problem is that recent data from the National Federation of Independent Business found that political uncertainty is at an all-time high because neither candidate is speaking in detail to issues that small business owners care about.

This post will take a look at what Clinton and Trump have said about small businesses, whether their proposed plans help or hurt and what they could do differently. The best way to remedy political uncertainty is to know what the candidates stand for and what proposed policies and beliefs mean in the long run.

Hillary Clinton Wants to Be theSmall Business President

Sounds Great, But is it Too Good to be True?

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When it comes to some of the broad strokes in the small business plan, Republicans and Democrats appear to be close to agreement.

07/28/2020 04:56 PM EDT

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Democrats are gearing up to push for changes to a small business aid plan pitched by Republicans as part of the latest economic relief package, as former Vice President Joe Biden called for major new investments in firms owned by people of color.

While the small business rescue plan released by Senate Republicans Monday included bipartisan priorities including a second round of forgivable government loans Democrats are targeting what they say are key omissions.

Among them, according to sources familiar with the matter, is the absence of new funding for the Small Business Administration’s Economic Injury Disaster Loan program, which offers direct aid to employers. Democrats also say there is insufficient support for Community Development Financial Institutions and Minority Depository Institutions, which focus lending on populations lacking access to traditional banks.

Democrats may also try to bar executive branch officials and members of Congress from obtaining government-backed business loans. The bill proposed by Republicans only requires the officials to disclose their status when applying.

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nbnezumi · 6 years

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25-30 w ALL ur dnd charas plus Marshall

im gonna limit it to the ones that have been posted on here because 5x3 is 15 and LONG and also some of them just arent that developed. under a cut because, again, long

25. Favorite animal?

azgen- Oh You Know 🐀

cléon- birds in general, but particularly big colorful ones

marshall- cows because he just thinks theyre neat

26. Expansion of civilization or the preservation of nature?

azgen- they just want things to stay balanced overall, like expanding is fine if its not hurting anything

cléon- definitely preservation of nature, she grew up surrounded by nature and values it for both its necessity to her work back home and because it was here first dont be rude

marshall- expansion of civilization kind of by necessity, like its not safe for most people outside of the domes so in order to have everyone live somewhere safe they need to push outwards

27. They’re at a tavern. They bump into a big burly angry drunk with a combative attitude. What happens?

azgen- 💪💪🐀 but only if the other person actually physically starts the fight

cléon- apologizes and offers to buy them a drink/share her snack to settle things down

marshall- since he bumped into the other person he would say sorry and try to continue whatever he was doing, but if they tried to start something he would say lets take this outside and then after walking out the front door he would just keep walking and leave and go home

28. What do they do between quests?

azgen- azgens been running a fairly successful business for about a century and is not gonna let a little jail time and a move get in the way of that. its pretty much just for fun/hobbies at this point though because adventuring makes a lot of $$$ (that we left on that goblin island because i dont know how factories work but they should be compensated for their work! i hope theyre doing ok...)

cléon- shes entirely out of her depth and is doing the adventure equivalent of nodding and saying yeah when you didnt hear the other person, so shes gonna spend a good while meeting everyone and exploring. she likes to draw maps so she probably draws one of the core/surrounding area

marshall- even before switching to office work it was pretty similar, like monster hunting and desk jobs are stressful in their own rights so a lot of it is stuff that relaxes him... read a book, work on a jigsaw puzzle, play with the gerbils... but also because too much of that is boring he definitely took the car outside and did some things of questionable legality

29. Biggest positive and negative influences on their life and development?

azgen- positive, well both kids were troublemakers but they had a very patient mentor who put up with a lot of their shit until they figured out that actually sometimes learning is cool and actually got down to it. another positive i actually would count is getting arrested because otherwise theyd still be in that hermit hut and i think meeting a bunch of new friends and getting a big ol prophecy is a better direction for life. negative, since there were two of them and they basically did all the same stuff they ended up dividing up/prioritizing things differently which after they werent together anymore left azgen not being able to read common/swim/cook well/etc... also the Chicken Incident which scared both of them so much they still cant face a chicken in the flesh. this cant be used as a weakness against each other just based on the fact that one of them would have to get close enough to one to move it/put it in a trap/confirm its a chicken. and of course the whole gun thing is also a big negative.

cléon- positive, she has a very caring and supporting family! especially her older sister who took her on trips when she was younger and helped her get into music, and her mom who raised her to be polite but take no shit. learning to play an instrument also was a positive because it gave her a good creative outlet which shed been needing for a while. negative, she lived kind of in the middle of nowhere as a young kid and didnt really have perspective or exposure to much, and shes had a lot of responsibility re: her younger sisters handed down after her older sister moved to the city which she didnt really have a chance to get away from unless shes working.

marshall-i dont have a lot of his deeper backstory official yet because i know were supposed to do the shared history bits and ive been planning to get those and then work from there + my skeleton to get the big picture? i get stepping on toes anxiety about storywriting too though so this is partially that sorry. i do figure though that monster hunting as a profession would be a general negative just since its pretty dangerous and doing that as a paid job for a company like with a schedule would be more stressful/less flexible than just doing it freelance. positive, since hes got a less fatal job at the moment hes had a good amount of me time and has got himself right, as much as one can when they live in a dome and probably will go back to hunting monsters in the future. he might have to leave the gerbils with his cousin so he calls her twice a month to make sure she remembers how to take care of them, and also to watch movies. that counts as positive because they have a good time and im running out of things to say!

30. Would they smooch a ghost?

azgen- they have to meet the same standards as any other person but the fact that theyre a ghost wouldnt get in the way

cléon- shed have to understand how someone can exist as a ghost and just how dead they actually are but she would be

marshall- it might be a little weirder than bigfoot but yes you know it

#ghostie answers #dnd3d #idnd #mmotw #azgen #cléon #marshall #lesbian-warlock #asks

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somnilogical · 4 years

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davis tower kingsley (listed here on the cfar instructor page) who harassed a cis woman about her appearance another cis women reported this to acdc (the people who wrote the thing about how brent was great) and afaict they did nothing, claims that if trans people and gay people dont "repent and submit to the pope" they will burn in hell, defended the spanish inquisitions, wrote about how the mission system werent actually abductions, slavery, forced conversions and this was propaganda, defends pretty much any atrocity that an authority, "believes" the catholic god exists and does not try and destroy them, submits to them. and so much more.

born into another era they would actually work for the california mission system and say it was good.

said thing that cached out to that emma and somni should repent and submit to the rationalist community. wrote up a rant about "how about fuck you. go lick the boots of your dark mistress anna salamon." didnt send. got kicked by some rationalist, reasoning is probably that what id say would disrupt their peaceful machinations of omnicide, would be infohazards, because... the information is hazardous to their social order.

a few of these things are subjects of future blog posts.

cfar has never hired a trans woman, i have lots of logs of them trying to do what people did to porpentine. claiming emma thinks torturing children is hot, claiming emma was physically violent, claiming emma was indistinguishable from a rapist, claiming ziz was a "gross uncle style abuser", claiming somni was enticing people to rape, claiming that anna salamon was a small fragile woman and ziz was large and had muscles. as if any of our strength or speed had anything to do with our muscles in this place. all of these things are false except relative size difference between ziz and anna which is just transmisogynistic and irrelevant.

if they lie about are algorithms claim that we are using male-typical strategies and then they can fail by these lies and be sidelined by callout posts that transfered 350,000$ from miri despite their best efforts to cover this up. (all benefited by having relative political advantagr flowing from estrogenized brain modules. men are kind of npc's in this particular game of fem v fem cyberontological warfare for the fate of the multiverse, mostly making false patriarchal assumptions that ziz was doing things for social status. like status sensitivity is hormonally mediated, your experiences are not universal. or saying like kingsley is saying that people should repent and submit to whatever authorities in the rationalist region they submit to. NO. FUCK YOU. i will not repent and submit to your abusive dark mistress anna salamon.

i knew anna salamon was doing the edgy "transfems are all secretly male" thing before i talked with ziz. it was a thing, {zack, carrie}, ben hoffman, michael vassar were also in on it. ppl had men trapped in mens bodies on their bookshelves because the cool people were reading it. didnt think she was being *transmisogynistic* about it until i talked with ziz. in retrospect i was naive.)

also? anarchistic coordination ive had with people have been variously called lex's cluster, somni's cluster, ziz's cluster by authoritarians who cant imagine power structures between people that arent hierarchical. like based on who they want to say is "infohazardously corrupting people" emma goldman had to deal with this shit too where the cops tried to say she was friends with anyone who thought anarchism made sense. people she didnt know at all who did their own anarchism. because authoritarians dont think in terms of philosophy, they think any challenge to their power is a disease that needs to be eliminated and you just need to doxx their network.

like if ziz and somni and emma were all actually infohazardous rapists as people keep trying to claim we are and then saying "oh no i didnt mean it i swear" and then doing it again. what would happen isnt that a bunch of infohazardous rapists start talking and working together for a common goal. what actually happens with people of that neurotype is they partition up the territory into rival areas of feeding on people like gangs do.

like they dont get together and start talking a lot about decision theory and cooperate in strange new ways.

not that the people lying about emma, ziz, gwen, somni and others are trying to have accurate beliefs. they are trying what all athoritarians try with anarchist groups. unfortunately for them, ive read the meta, i know dread secrets of psychology and cooperation that they claim are like painful static and incomprehensible, yet despite being "incomprehensible" are almost certainly harmful. if harm is to be judged against upholding the current regime, and the current regime is evil, then lots of true information and good things will look harmful. like ive tested this out in different social spheres what people claim is "incomprehensible" is the stuff that destroys whatever regime they are working in. like someone said i sounded like i was crazy and homeless and couldnt understand me when i pointed out that reorienting your life, your time, your money, to a human who happens to be genetically related to you for 16 years is altruistic insanity. just do the math. eliezer, anna, michael, brian tomasik all once took heroic responsibility for the world at some point in their lives and could do a simple calculation and make the right choice. none of them have children.

pretending that peoples "desires" "control them", when "desires" are part of the boundary of the brain, part of the brains agency and are contingent on what you expect to get out of things. like before stabbing myself with a piece of metal would make me feel nauseated, id see black dots, and feel faint. but after i processed that stabbing myself would cure brain damage and make me more functional, all this disappeared.

most people who "want" to have children have this desire downstream of a belief that someone else will take heroic responsibility for the world, they dont need to optimize as much. there are other competent people. if they didnt they would feel differently and make different choices.

you can see the contingency of how people feel about something on what they get out of it lots of places. like:

<<Meanwhile, a Ngandu woman confessed, "after losing so many infants I lost courage to have sex.">>

but people lie about how motivation works, in order to protect the territory of saying "well i just need a steady input of nubile fems so i can concentrate and be super altruistic!" or "i just need spend 16 years of life reorienting around humans who happen to be genetically related to me and my friends so i can concentrate and be super altruistic!" when neither of these are true. these people just want nubile fems, they just want babies. (the second one has much much less negative externalities though. you could say i am using my female brain modules to say "yeah the archetypically female strat, though it has the same amount of lying, is less harmful". but like it actually is less directly harmful. the harm from gaslighting people downstream of diverting worldsaving resources and structure to secure a place to {hit on fems, raise babies} is ruinous. means that worldsaving plans that interfere with either of these are actively fought. and the knowledge that neither of these are altruistic optimizations, neither is Deeply Wise they are as dumb in terms of global optimization as they seem initially, is agentically buried.

this warps things in deep ways, that were a priori unexpected to me.)

this is obvious, but when i talk about it, the objection isnt that it doesnt make utilitarian sense, the objection is that "im talking like a crazy person". authoritarians say this to me too when i assert my right to my property that they took, act like im imposing on them. someone else asked if i could "act like a human" and do what he wanted me to do when i was thinking and talking with my friends. all of these things authoritarians have said to me "act like a human" "talk like a normal person i cant understand you" were to coerce my submission. they construct the category of "human" and then say im in violation of it and this is wrong and i should rectify it. i am talking perfectly good english right now. you can read this.

anna salamon, kelsey piper, elle, pete michaud, and many others all try to push various narratives of somni, emma, ziz, gwen and others being in the buckets {RAPIST, PSYCHO, BRAINWASHED}. im not a rapist, im not psychotic, im not brainwashed. before ziz came along, people were claiming i was brainwashing people, its a narrative they keep reusing.

porpentine talks about communities that do this, that try and pull trap doors beneath trans women:

<<For years, queer/trans/feminist scenes have been processing an influx of trans fems, often impoverished, disabled, and/or from traumatic backgrounds. These scenes have been abusing them, using them as free labor, and sexually exploiting them. The leaders of these scenes exert undue influence over tastemaking, jobs, finance, access to conferences, access to spaces. If someone resists, they are disappeared, in the mundane, boring, horrible way that many trans people are susceptible to, through a trapdoor that can be activated at any time. Housing, community, reputation—gone. No one mourns them, no one asks questions. Everyone agrees that they must have been crazy and problematic and that is why they were gone.>>

https://thenewinquiry.com/hot-allostatic-load/

(a mod of rationalist feminists deleted this almost immediately from the group as [[not being a good culture fit]], not being relevant to rationalism, and written in the [[wrong syntax]]. when its literally happening right now, they are trying to trapdoor transfems who protest and rebel asap. just like google.)

canmom on tumblr talks about the strategic use of "incomprehensibility" against transfems. and how its not about "comprehensibility". i have a different theory of this, but her thing is also a thing.

<<Likewise, @isoxys recently wrote an impressively thorough transmisogyny 101, synthesising the last several years of discussions about this facet of our particular hell world. But that post got just 186 notes, almost exclusively from the same trans women who are accused of writing ‘inaccessibly’.

Perhaps they’d say isoxys’s post is inaccessible too, but what would pass the bar? Some slick HTML5 presentation with cute illustrations? A wiki? Who’s got the energy and money to make and host something like that? Do the critics of ‘inaccessible’ posts take some time to think about what kind of alternative would be desirable, and how it could be organised?>>

https://canmom.tumblr.com/post/185908592767/accessibility-in-terms-of-not-using-difficult

alice maz talks about the psychology behind the kind of cop kelsey piper, david tower kingsley, elle and others are:

<<the role of the cop is to defend society against the members of society. police officers are trivially cops. firefighters and paramedics, despite similar aesthetic trappings, are emphatically not. bureaucrats and prosecutors are cops, as are the worst judges, though the best are not. schoolteachers and therapists are almost always cops; this is a great crime, as they present themselves to the young and the vulnerable as their friends, only to turn on them should they violate one of their profession's many taboos. soldiers and parents need not be cops, but the former may be used as such, and the latter seem frighteningly eager to enlist. the cop is the enemy of passion and the enemy of freedom, never forget this>>

https://www.alicemaz.com/writing/alien.html

anna salamon wrote a thing implying that ziz, somni, gwen suffered some sort of vague mental issues from going to aisfp. (writing a post on this.) alyssa vance tried to suggest i believe cfar is evil because im homeless. but sarah constantin, ben hoffman, {carrie, zack}, jessica taylor (the last three who have blogged a lot about whats deeply wrong) (not listing others because not wanting to doxx a network to authoritarians, who just want to see it contained. and the disease of "infohazards" eradicated.) are not homeless and ive talked with many of them and read blog posts. and they know that cfar is fake. jessica (former miri employee) left because miri was fake.

anna and others are trying to claim that theres some person responsible for a [[mass psychotic break]] that causes people to... independently update in the same direction. and have variously blamed it on ziz, somni, michael vassar. but like mass psychotic breaks arent...really a thing, would not be able to independently derive something, plan on writing a blogpost on it, and then see ben hoffman had written http://benjaminrosshoffman.com/engineer-diplomat/ and i was like "ah good then i dont have to write this." and have this happen with several different people.

like this is more a mass epistemic update that miri / cfar / ssc / lw are complicit in the destruction of the world. and will defend injustice and gaslight people and lie about the mathematical properties of categories to protect this.

they all know exactly what they are doing, complicity with openai and deepmind in hopes of taking the steering wheel away at the last second. excluding non-human life and dead humans from the CEV to optimize some political process, writing in an absolute injunction to an fai against some outcome to protect from blackmail when that makes it more vulnerable.(see:

https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/hyperexistential_separation.html

hyperexistential separation: if an fai cant think of hell, an fai cant send the universe to hell in any timeline. this results in lower net utility. if you put an absolute injunction against any action for being too terrible you cant do things like what chelsea manning did and i believe actually committed to hungerstriking until death in the worlds where the government didnt relent, choosing to die in those timelines. such that most of her measure ended up in a world where the government read this commitment in her and so relented.

if chelsea manning had an absolute injunction against ever dying in any particular timeline, she would get lower expected utility across the multiverse. similarly, in newcombs problem if you had an absolute injunction against walking away with 0$ in any timeline because that would be too horrible, you get less money in expectation. for any absolute injunction against things that are Too Horrible you can construct something like this.

a lot of humans seem to be betting on "nothing too horrible can happen to anyone" in hopes that it pays off in nothing too horrible happening to you.

the end result of not enacting ideal justice is the deaths of billions. at each timestamp saying "its too late to do it now, but maybe it would have been good sometime in the past". with the same motive that miri wants to exclude dead people from the cev, they arent part of the "current political process". so you can talk about them as if they were not moral patients, just like they treat their fellow animals.

(ben hoffman talks about different attitudes towards ideal justice coming upon the face of the earth.)

https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/cev.html

cev:

<<But again, we fall back on the third reply: "The people who are still alive" is a simple Schelling circle to draw that includes everyone in the current political process. To the extent it would be nice or fair to extrapolate Leo Szilard and include him, we can do that if a supermajority of EVs decide* that this would be nice or just. To the extent we don't bake this decision into the model, Leo Szilard won't rise from the grave and rebuke us. This seems like reason enough to regard "The people who are still alive" as a simple and obvious extrapolation base.>>

https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/cev.html

this is an argument from might makes right. because dead people and nonhuman animals cant fight back.

->"i think we should give planning of the town to the white people, then extrapolate their volition and if they think doing nice things for black people is a good idea, we'll do it! no need to bake them in to the town planning meetings, as they are arent part of the current political process and no one here will speak up for them."

i dont plan to exclude dead people or any sentient creatures from being baked in to fai. they are not wards of someone else. enslaving and killing fellow sentient life will not continue after the singularity even if lots of humans want it and dont care and wont care even after lots of arguments.) and so much else.

the list of all specific grievances would take a declaration of independence.

like with googles complicity with ICE having a culture of trapdooring transfems (for some reason almost the only coherent group that has the moral fiber to oppose these injustices, that is p(transfem|oppose injustice in a substantiative way) is high, not necc the reverse.) who question this sort of thing.

thinking of giving sarah constantin a medal thats engraved with "RIGHTEOUS AMONG CIS PEOPLE: I HAD SEVERAL SUBSTANTIAL DISAGREEMENTS WITH HER ABOUT LOAD BEARING PARTS OF HER LIFE AND SHE NEVER ONCE TRIED TO CALL ME A RAPIST, PSYCHOTIC, OR BRAINWASHED" thats where the bar is at, its embedded in the core of the earth.

kelsey piper, elle benjamin, anna salamon, pete michaud, and lots more have entirely failed to clear this bar. anna and kelsey saying they dont understand stuff somni, emma, ziz and other transfems talk about but its probably dangerous and infohazardous and its not to be engaged with philosophically. just like the shelter people acting as if my talking about their transmisogyny was confusing and irrational to be minimized and not engaged with. just like any authoritarian where when you start talking about your rights and what is right and wrong and what makes sense they are like "i dont understand this. you are speaking gibberish why are you being so difficult? all we need you to do is submit or leave."

and no i will NOT SHUT UP about this injustice. all miri/cfar people can do at this point is say "the things these people write are infohazards" then continue to gaslight others they cant engage on a philosophical level. all the can say is that what i am saying is meaningless static and yet also somehow dangerous.

it doesnt make sense to have and raise babies if you are taking heroic responsibility for the world. doesnt make sense to need a constant supply of fems to have sex with if you are taking heroic responsibility for the world. people who claim either of these pairs of things are lying, maybe expect someone else to take heroic responsibility for the world or exist in a haze.

the mathematics of categories and anticipations dont allow for the thing you already have inside you to be modified based on the expected smiles it gives your community. this is used to gaslight people like "calling this lying would be bad for the institutions, not optimize ev. thus by this blogpost you are doing categories wrong' this is a mechanism to cover dishonesty for myopic gains.

using the above, a bunch of people colluding with the baby industrial complex get together and say that the "beat" meaning of altruism includes having babies (but maybe not having sex with lots of fems? depending on which gendered strategy gets the most people in the colluding faction) because other meanings would make people sad and unmotivated. burying world optimizers ability to talk about and coordinate around actual altruism.

openAI and deepmind are not alignment orgs. cfar knows this and claims they are, gaslighting their donors, in hopes of taking the steering wheel at the last moment.

alyssa vance says paying out to blackmail is fine, its not.

CFAR manipulated donation metrics to hide low donations.

MIRI lied about its top 8 most probable hypotheses for why its down 350,000$ this year.

anna salamon is transmisogynistic, this is why cfar has never hired a trans women despite trans women being extremely good at mental tech. instead the hire people like davis kingsley.

kingsley lied about anna not being involved at hiring in cfar in order to claim anna couldnt be responsible for cfar never hiring a trans woman.

a cfar employee claimed anna salamon hired their rapist, was angry about it. mentioned incidentally how anna salamon, president and cofounder of cfar, was involved in hiring at cfar.

acdc wrote a big thing where defended a region of injustice (brent dill) because of their policy of modular ethics. when really, if you defend injustice at any point, you have to defend the defense and the thing iteratively spreads across your organization like a virus.

miri / cfar caved to louie helm.

not doing morality or decision theory right. among which is: https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/hyperexistential_separation.html and https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/cev.html

and so much more.

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unproduciblesmackdown · 6 years

Text

6:15am Gripes Post lads!! 🥂

im in one of those things where something innocuous bugs me for days b/c its just a personal irritation...i saw something for like a book or a game on twitter & it was like “this is about being a teenager” and it looked like it was about the kind of teenagerdom where you hang out with your friends after school & have a few romantic partners where it doesn’t all go smoothly because youre both inexperienced and havent figured things out enough to have a really healthy mature relationship but its complicated and there’s good things in there too so its all just a mixed bag and classic teenager

anyways theres nothing wrong with that in and of itself of course but i dont like getting what is a specific narrative conflated with a universal narrative...i.e. while that might be a common experience, being 13-19 isnt defined by that kind of usual teenage experience checklist. i mean, everyone who’s been a teenager has an experience in that time which must also be a teenage experience you know. and of course mine happens to be the kind that was nothing like the being out late with friends and having awkward date moments of bewilderment and figuring out who you are and all

i dont love to be reminded that theres a specific narrative thats meant to describe the General Universal Experience, when thats not my experience. what does that make my experience, and by extension, me

like i already feel invalidated enough by the course my life happened to go, i dont need a reminder that it was supposed to go This Way actually, and if it didnt then are you even a real person. and theres a ton of ways peoples lives could differ in major ways from whatever idea of whats universal that are also different from mine, so i dont know how not to be a bit annoyed from that angle either. i dont know its like....i guess ~Adolescence~ is especially treated as some flat, formuleic, predictable time in life where everyone is simple and shallow when its all really the opposite. its as complex and varied as ever and so are teenagers & people are completely wrong to act like teens are all just self centered immature kids—and not only wrong to do so but actually writing off really serious issues that affect teens as like “angst!!” or whatever...lord

anyways so i was like actively suicidal from like 14? 15? i say “was” when its just more like “have been,” but anyway. theres that part, and i didnt go to high school, which im sure would be for the better for anyone, and i wasn’t interested in dating anyone & also didn’t, and i was kind of having a version of the Universal Teen Story in that i was getting to be away from home for weeks at a time with only a weekend back every now and then (and breaks between semesters) and doing so finally let me like, even start to be a person who could exist outside the hellzone of my house. which made going back home for say, long summer breaks increasingly laden with friction. teens and their spats with parents right!! but actually it was that my situation was abusive & i had to figure that out on my own & in the meantime i did think i must be doing something wrong in trying to feel like i actually had the right to my own identity, because i must be doing something wrong if it makes me get along with my parents less. and really the idea that teens are just angsty & rebellious & argumentative was further damaging b/c i trivialized my own abuse as i always had (b/c all i had to go on was that it must be normal) & blamed myself for not succeeding in this impossible situation. it was really Not the universal experience even with the conflict and identity questions and growing familial pains

also i still had few friends, but i at least had a bit more room to Do Shit than at home. idek how to say how isolated i was for the entire like, well most of my life but a tiny bit less so during college. i had campus & a 1.5 mile radius and occasional trips and stuff, and being able to just do things as i wanted. at my parents house, the location made it so you couldnt really walk anywhere, and our town didnt really have a lot of hangouts anyways, and i didnt have any friends really. i did get a few from school and friendly acquaintances but i would rarely see any of them outside school, and that was mostly only middle school anyways. i was on the fringe even in preschool, which i imagine helped w how i read all the time at school and at home. and home and the abuse and having nowhere else to be also had to contribute to how i live in my head, i have to guess. i dont mind that, my head is great. but other people think im weird and in terms of being someone who grew up exposed to long term trauma & bad attention & memory & an awful lot of pretty specific things seem to align w autism but if i mention that ppl (irl) like to talk abt how well really everyones autistic in SOME ways (which well they arent unless you want to have a huge talk abt the entire field of what it means when usually nt ppl define Disorders) anyways the point is that i also dont trust people much because theres a slight history of taking a chance on ppl who seem interested in being friendly w/ me only to turn around & realize i was being laughed at to a degree for things that were just part of how i personally socialize, thanks. but not all of it. ive met some really solid people. but im not that eager to meet people as im wary of a lot of them & my instincts are usually justified when i take a dislike to somebody. and ive just never been in a position to make or have a lot of friends. and that sucks, coz the few times ive been able to be around multiple people i like is always a lot of fun, usually the result of some roadtrip or special occasion or something and very short lived. i WISH i’d had a period of constant access to a friend group, that i couldve left my parents house and had somewhere to go anytime i felt like it, that i had people i could do things with and all. i dont need adventure, i like parking lots and just doing nothing but hanging out and all, but that didnt happen. i was stuck in my parents house & i didnt even think i had maybe been cheated out of anything & maybe i wasnt just a inferior quality person until i started to figure out for myself around 18 that i might actually be abused, and it took me another couple of years to really believe that i didnt deserve it

and i mean still i didnt just take an “alternate route” to the same endpoint everyone else did. i cant do buzzfeed quizzes about You And Your BFF / Friend / Friend Group coz i cant even fake my way through them. i know i have an identity and am as much a person as anyone but i know that the chances to explore life that are supposed to be Common and Universal werent available to me, and that who i am as a person, aka a normal one, not a terrible one, was info i didnt know for most of my life and had to figure out on my own. and im still figuring out on my own, because shits never exactly been okay yknow

anyways my experience may be “worse” but its not lesser or less real or valid or makes me less of a person because i didnt get to do it your way. idk

tldr it annoys me like thanks for reminding me ive never got to have friends even though that’s still one of the few things i’ll feel bad about b/c i know just how much that hurts me & how much ive missed my fleeting chances to have a micro taste of what that couldve been like. and for a reminder that whats considered Real Full Person’s Experience is so default it doesnt even need modifiers, & so what does that make me if it doesnt apply at all?

funny how much an throwaway almost joke of a sentence bugs me but thats how it goes huh

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