#literally i would see a post and be like ''haha i do that' like that one vine

[csny]

not to be messy but how do you feel about people stealing other peoples viral posts on tumblr and reposting it on twitter like it’s theirs. (she’s on here by guttergirl-444) & she has stolen many more lol

at first glance it’s like shock and amazement more than anything because i never thought this would happen to me, but when i actually stop to think about it, it actually is very frustrating and invasive. i know it happens all the time and i can’t really stop it, plus my posts have no copyright or anything but it is true, when i make posts that aren’t haha funny laugh a lot play a lot, they kind of are little extensions of my artwork. like drafts and ideas that often get elaborated on if they seem to connect with people.

i don’t really want to dunk on other artists because it feels mean spirited, but i just want to point out this one instance that shows how writing anything on tumblr is “just a tumblr post” and people often don’t consider that there’s a person behind it. it’s almost like a popular tumblr post becomes fair use. This artist here took my words directly from my post (and even used the same iconography of a beach??) and when you click on the link in the description, it takes you to their instagram account with 142k followers. not even a single nod to me, who wrote the actual words. as an extra little punch, they call themself a poet in their bio.

sure my post was a bottom text top text “meme image” but there was a lot behind it—in both thought and time. the exact same ideas and photos made their way into a book i made just a couple months later. i think i sold umm one copy?

all in all, im not complaining about lacking “popularity” because that’s utterly stupid. but there’s something moderately soul-crushing about making a tumblr post and having it ripped to shreds by all walks of life online. It literally feels like i’ve placed something beautiful in the world out of my own kindness, then walked away, and when i come back everyone has defaced and damaged and killed it. it’s kind of invasive but I know it’s the way things go.

i love the anonymity of tumblr but sometimes I wish it we were all a little more open. Maybe people could remember that behind every blog is another person with ideas, cares, opinions, annoyances, and loves. I’m sure this one twitter account isn’t really doing much damage—honestly I haven’t even gone to look at it to see how people are replying—but it’s rough out there on this beautiful social media we call tumblrposts.

[separatist-apologist]

The only person that is embarassing is you defending ewriels when they'd never defend you haha

This is the last thing I'll say on this subject, so put on your listening ears and your reading eyes (historically not a strong suit in this fandom).

First of all, you don't know literally anything about me or my fandom friends, plenty of whom are Elriels that have had my back in a myriad of disagreement that would make your asshole wet. Your mindset of us vs them is so juvenile, the kind of things my twelve year old understands isn't helpful when it comes time to take accountability for the things they've done wrong.

Secondly, relationships are not and do not need to be reciprocal. If I see ya'll acting like mean ass bullies, I'm gonna say something regardless on who has my back. Someone SHOULD- this is a BOOK. You all make me feel like a crazy person sometimes the way you act like advocating for your ship is actually advocacy on par with any social justice movement. Oh NO words on a page I don't agree with- better harass REAL LIFE PEOPLE ABOUT IT. Embarrassing.

And finally, I'm glad you saw my post and recognized I was talking directly to you. I'm not embarrassed for saying the fandom and ship war is toxic because ya'll on BOTH SIDES actively KEEP IT THAT WAY. Sorry you're just now realizing that being an elucien actually doesn't absolve you from being a cruel, immature bully.

Anyway have a terrible day! You deserve it!

#i hope this was helpful to anyone else that things they can shame me into shutting the fuck up #so they can keep being assholes in the tags hyped up by other assholes #like maybe the fandom would be less toxic if yall learned how to mind your own business #and stopped taking the bait #anti whatever the fuck this is

[moash]

hello don't mind me i was just mass liking your posts! i hope you're having a great day i hope you don't mind this ramble but i feel you'd understand :)

so basically i've had a super long .... beef with the series so far about how it's handling racism/classism and their roles in the story so i was like hey, let me do a little fix it project! because after reading OB i was just disappointed with how it handled kaladin's arc (he's my favorite so i want to see him done justice) but also moash's arc.

anyway, i was rereading parts of WOR to get the details right, and re-reading Moash talk about what happened to his family and how he just returned and they were all gone BROKE MY HEARTTTT. i also noticed how he was so ready to put in the work during training to get good at using swords and shardblades. like he had CONVICTION to succeed and i loved that about him.

so moash literally went from a character i didn't mind on my first read to becoming one of my favorites and now i just get so upset thinking about like how the series is painting him so far. i bring this up because i was like dang, if i'm this pressed about it, i can't imagine tumblr-user-moash's feelings about it. anyway here's to hoping that SA5 does him justice. also moash for bondsmith is brilliant. also thank you for defending him 😌 sorry if this is repetitive but do you feel optimistic that a redemption arc could happen for him in SA5?

mass likers are like being visited by angels, i love youuu 💕 and i would love to read your fix-it if you ever post it 👀

as for sa5. haha. i try to keep really optimistic about it. i am a writer myself and everything that i believe about writing good stories tells me that he basically has to be redeemed, even if it’s right before his death (cliche, but it would at least still fulfill the assignment). right? because the themes of redemption for the entire story would be just completely thrown out in a major way if he wasn’t, not to mention that every moash pov chapter that revealed his complex feelings about his choices and his current situation would have been made essentially pointless and time-wasting. like i don’t see from an objective writing standpoint how the story could be good if he wasn’t redeemed, and that keeps me going more than anything else, because while i have a lot of issues with sanderson’s writing, i don’t think he’s just plain stupid, right? so yea, that’s what keeps me going.

however!!! he has really dropped the ball with regards to racism/classism/etc in stormlight, so while this would i think be his biggest fumble yet, it’s not entirely impossible to see some truly bad stuff happen in moash’s arc in sa5. but i try to keep optimistic and keep my expectations relatively low (like death bed redemption would suck but i guess i would ultimately be ok with it, sigh)

sorry that i forgot to answer this for so long, and thank you for stopping by!! 🥰💕

#ask #anon #moash #kowt speculation #kowt #the stormlight archive

[dozzarr]

My friend sent me a Troy and abed post saying that it was literally us and now I think I have a crush on her wtaf

#if you found this post ignore it haha just a jest #if not AHFJGKG #AND LIKE #I really feel like she was hinting at something last night????? #I was playing so dumb though #UGH #FUCK YOU PAST ME #soz #do I tag this as trobed #kinda??? #spiritually trobed #trobed #community #troy and abed #dumbest lesbian on earth award goes to me #this isn’t even anonymous #my username is my literal nickname #if she sees this I’m FUCKED #whoopsies #if you’re reading this I would like to clarify that this has been like #a while #it’s not just the Troy and abed stuff #why am I confessing my feelings in a tumblr tags section #cringeeeeee #this is gonna be so humiliating if I was reading the signals wrong

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

i still have not gotten to ketsu itself let alone post ketsu but.... ive seen Sources that say that after ketsu, izaya was left with pretty severe ptsd after shizuo nearly killed him... so a post-ketsu shizaya relationship would probably have izaya's ptsd flaring up- it's not something izaya can control, its just an instinctive thing... shizuo and izaya cuddling in bed but shizuo's hand brushes the exact wrong spot on izaya's back, izaya having nightmares and shizuo grappling over wether or not to wake him up because if he wakes him up, izaya will react on instinct and shizuo cant bear to see him so afraid of him, and he knows its selfish and cowardly to keep izaya asleep but ht just cant bring himself to do it and have his heart broken like that; he entrusted it to izaya and he cant bear the heartbreak, even if izaya didn't mean to break his heart

and of course izaya would know shizuo's thoughts on this and would try desperately to suppress his ptsd, which ends up making it erupt violently when it does flare up. izaya would absolutely hate the lack of control he has over his actions and how the ptsd he never wanted will end up pushing shizuo away from him

(i do still attest that izaya was mentally ill before the ketsu-related ptsd- even to the point of possibly already having ptsd- but the ketsu stuff is overpowering him because its new and the wounds are still raw, and shizuo is right there to give his trauma-addled brain a constant reminder of being so close to death)

#shizuo heiwajima #izaya orihara #orihara izaya #heiwajima shizuo #shizaya #durarara #and shizuo finding out that there is therapy that can help izaya walk again but izaya refused it #and intentionally sits in a way that hurts his legs #like. thats selfharm like. i dont care what anyone says #thats literally selfharm. #i have DONE THIS haha hey Fiance Of Mine Who Reads My Posts #and also my Brothers Who Read My Posts As Well #ive literally done this #intentionally shifted to or stayed (usually stayed) in positions #that made my knee pain flare up #as a form of selfharm #seeing izaya do it.... Thats Selfharm Babe!! #he may not be a cutter (as far as we know) but what hes doing IS a form of sh #shizuo would be so heated over it #im not sure if hed drop the 'this is selfharm' bomb but he would see it for how unhealthy it is #i see places that say izaya did this so he wont run from people anymore #but this is an insanely unhealthy way to do it #hes just self flagellating at this point and i think it would make shizuo feel sick #that his actions caused this to happen #and of course izaya wouldnt want him to know #but shizuo would find out anyway becuz hes not stupid #i think post ketsu shizaya has a lot of ~fun~ possibilities #wrt izaya newly crumbling mental health #and very blatant selfharm #waposts

[8lah8lah]

"both sides of shipcourse are wrong" says person about to not bat a fucking eye when someone on one side gets chased off the fucking internet and doxxed and told they deserve assault for liking ships that are abusive in a way they dont immediately understand/relate to. "shipping discourse is just sooo dumb and immature" says person about to fucking gasp and scream and tell all their mutuals and post "STOP putting ***** on my dash in 202_" vagues like A Gross Drawing Existing In The World is going to singlehandedly groom and traumatize and enable and Normalize everything for everyone on the planet simultaneously for simply being put out there and it being out there is a category 10000 mental safety hazard that they must bravely defend people from. "youre stupid if you care about ship discourse lmao" posts brave tumblr user about to get really upset publically over One person they saw shipping a like, 4-year age gap between two fictional chars that's there if you Squint, an opinion that Clearly has NOTHING to do with very specifically one side of the discourse

#8log upd8 #bottom line i really really Rreally resent people going 'oh haha this Stupid Internet Drama #is So Dumb and everyone who cares about it is dumb too' followed by #literally ruining somebody's life because they never bothered to look into or learn why #that person likes the stuff they do. OR LIKE GIVE THEM ANY GOOD FAITH AT ALL? #at the very very very very fucking least you would ASSUME these people see someone getting #Harassed Off The Fucking Internet and go hm did this person really deserve it. what did they do #and why and what is their side of the story. #NOPE its just Ummmm make sure to not reblog from *** or youll get Freak Poisoning by proximity!! #it's why i don't really post my own stuff on here anymore; i don't feel comfortable- #-being in a social environment where people will just up and decide someone deserves #to Not Exist where they can see them anymore. even if it's not me it's happening to #it's too cruel and i can't stand it ._.; if you do or allow stuff like this please unfollow me #or better just block me outright. 'oh but what if they post-' I Don't Fucking Care #unless they're posting about specific real living/lived human beings in harmful ways #they don't deserve this shit and even if they WERE posting about real people (they arent.) #what do you think online harassment would do to stop that? you think predators are gonna #get vagued and go Aw shucks ive been caught better stop being weird about specific real children! #tags are getting long lol sorry

[villainsidestep]

'stop updating us on ur random thoughts every night' no

#gideon shut the hell up challenge #sorry for 24/7 thinking abt fawn !!! (<- lying) anyway. #first thought is v3 post-robbery bringing cyrus to the hq to go see the rangers/chen and ric noticing fawn sporting some new injuries #(we default to a cut lip bc he is Touchy and I think that would explode their brain but any injury will do) #and he comments on how they didn't have those before and they're like oh haha uh yeah it. happens. u know how it is. #and also we like to think that he calls them bambi. smth that he has literally done since hero days. and they're immediately like 😳 #bc their brothers are RIGHT THERE.... one of whom u DATED ricardo !!! (they do not Say this tho they just think it v intensely) #and c/r are ofc sharing a link w them and are suddenly like um okay well. it Wasn't weird until u fucking reacted like that ??? #....... honestly what if they don't even reintroduce cyrus properly what if he just meets up w them at ranger hq and is suddenly There. #chen walking into the break room seeing r/f: god dammit. chen walking in and seeing that now there's also cyrus: God Dammit. #I just think. if they're siblings. they're Absolutely giving each other hell each time a crush gets realized considering their dating pool #they could be across the city from each other but the second u develop even a Partial crush the other two are Immediately Aware #and like okay yeah sure fawnric is funny bc ur brother's ex ?? Really ??? but hello ????? river/chen ???? CYRUS/DANNY ??????

[chibishortdeath]

So much happening in the world and in my personal life at once and I am completely unable to do anything about any of it. I am completely exhausted. I need to move out, but I can’t.

I’ve been stuck with a headache for a few months.

#text post #vent post #tw vent #cw vent #I’d say delete later but I don’t ever actually do that anyway #maybe I should go through vents and delete them Al #tbh I’m starting to realize that maybe never being allowed to do anything and never being taught how to do anything as a kid was neglect #it probably also wasn’t normal that I tried to be the ‘easy kid’ and avoid any perceived trouble as much as physically possible #I usually just sit in the furthest part of the house dissociate and try to immediately appear fine if anyone walks in and sees me #idk maybe I should just make that super self indulgent Simon’s Quest comic since it’ll probably be practically vent art anyway #he’s a little bit too relatable for comfort #and man I didn’t even fight Dracula to end up messed up how lame smh 😔 #I feel like I would just end up feeling guilty that I’m not doing something else more important though #most of the things I can do right now I can’t without guilt that stops me somewhere through #and that includes trying to rest haha yippie :/ #I can’t even draw the blorbo dead about it like it’s past that level of bad #I guess I shouldn’t even suggest doing anything I can’t do too #I don’t even wanna look at my instagram rn I can’t fix any of that either #idk if I should go into any details or not but I literally just can’t change anything #and I know I can’t get better unless I leave but I can’t leave and there’s nowhere to go #even places online are starting to become uninhabitable #we truly live in a time :/ #I’m just typing anything I think of as I think of it #tldr ​I am a terrible person who can’t get better because I’m stuck in a terrible situation and everything sucks basically #i’m exhausted #i feel so trapped #it feels like I have no autonomy or effect on the world at all #ugh I’m not explaining anything correctly enough anyway #I guess supper is almost ready and I should stop ranting at nothing #I’m basically just here to try to make it to 29 at least for the silly Simon game reference haha that is so pathetic

[clownattack]

Whenever i am told thangs abt the leech i just go. What an embarrassing person gosh

#iykyk #god damn #The stupidest and most oblivious person ive ever came in relatively close contact with /gen. With several ppl who know them irl agreeing #i kind of feel bad they dont even realize this but not gonna bother myself with it its just me going damn #unfortunate #apparently they are under impression im a lurker. one of their MANY projections but possibly the funniest/most pathetic one #i literally did not see their blog/crs blog since waaay back when we were still getting along #i have 0 reason to go in their spaces #last ive heard they were obsessively going thru tags on my posts day in and out #at work out of work #that makes ONE lurker in all this haha even crink knew to stop at some point LMAO #literally all i know is from ppl telling me soz m8 #osmosis #just. the fact they believe ppl care enough to lurk on them is really funny in a sad way #ive been told they are paranoid abt one of their followers or something? #theyre nobody i know but stay paranoid ig #the assumption ppl would care enough #i was chortling while having old pellets read out for me #i would have to be insane to care abt what someone like that says #by which i mean an undiagnosed unmanaged shut in #quote /the universe hates them/ #definitely nothing to do with them being a mess #fitting that they have an alter ego/sona that is just their bad traits concentrated #like yeah. why are we even upset LMAO #projection town on their end allllllll the way it just screams /unwell and out of the loop/ #they dont know... ajajaj... #night was not happy abt that post no surprise there #YES they are enabling infidelity yes they are inserting themself. was supposed to stay in the house a few months and now. poor night jfc #nine months to go is too long #im so glad she told them

[im-captain-basch]

Sometimes I wonder if there were ever more signs of me being neurodivergent that should have clued me in to not quite being "typical" sooner than how hyperfixated I've always been on DKC (and believe me, what you guys see here is me tame), but THEN I remember that time I won a contest held by an RP blog with a near perfect score and also gave so much additional information on each question that literally had not been asked for and I think that maybe that was the biggest second clue I could have looked out for.

#alex speaks #the only episode id seen by that point was silence in the library #so LITERALLY how i managed to swing that i have no fucking clue #thank you tardis wiki for keeping me occupied for weeks before then o7 #deadass didnt even realize there WAS a difference until i got on this website and started relating to people's nd experiences #literally i would see a post and be like ''haha i do that' like that one vine #then someone mentioned a way they were as a kid that was eerily similar to me and i was like... wait a minute. #alex overshares #at least its in the notes this time lmao

[volfoss]

hi sorry im like. so so mad about media so im putting this silly rant abt the witcher under the cut <3 spoilers for ummm the books or smth but i dont think my mutuals are into this so 👍

So i just hit Blood of Elves (the 3rd book) and met Triss. so not only did she literally SA/take advantage of geralt (as is the fucking pattern in these books w women towards him and the author and the plot treating any time geralt gets in this position as haha funny so many hot women want him :/) but she is um. absolutely fucking horrible. it is so confusing to me how so many fans love her (because even if you've only played the 3rd game, she LITERALLY point blank jokes with him about how people will no longer take advantage of him since he no longer has memory issues, and when he asks who was taking advantage of him, she was just like me :3. like its never elaborated on its just a fucking joke because we <3 feminism in this series!!) but if you've read the books it just becomes more clear how shes treating him. its a really disgusting pattern of behavior where most of his lovers either treat him like a freak and a mutant (which is sure soooo funny when hes treated like that by normal citizens) or just like a sexual object for them to use, with no regards to his consent. and by god triss has embodied both of those so so badly, where shes just nonstop either lusting after him (when he shows literally NO interest in her at this point lmao) or just treating him like shit. shes constantly guilt tripping him about ciri which is so fucking frustrating bc all the stuff shes bringing up under the guise of haha epic feminism moment is handled SO badly. she basically forces femininity on ciri who is like. barely 12 or 13 by this point (if my math is right) and who literally asks if triss will turn her into a boy and who is more than happy with dressing in male clothes. but triss finds this an absolute travesty that ciri literally has a diy haircut (or one of the men did it for her bc its mega crooked) and takes it into her own hands to turn her into a super pretty polished girl like. adjacent to beauty pageants but fantasy medieval. it is um. incredibly frustrating to see all of this and how triss consistently tells geralt his parenting sucks and that ciri shouldnt be with him (despite the fact ciri only feels safe around him and he does a rly good job parenting in his own way. like its not traditional bc he IS a cringefail adoptive single dad but its also like it doesnt need to be and he cares about her safety so much but wtv) and that he just overall sucks as a person. but we r supposed to root for the two of them to get together as in most of the games, she's the primary/most fleshed out romance option. and its like i do NOT expect ppl just playing the games or watching the netflix series to read the books but its also like she is genuinely really bad to him a lot, just talking down to him and it is actually um. very interesting bc geralt as a character is very emotionless a lot of the time (some of this is due to him being a witcher but some of it is just his personality or the trauma hes endured) but the increase of him just being upset or silent and resigned has increased tenfold in just the first 100 pages of this book. its so so frustrating to see esp after seeing how bad yennefer was treated, i really hoped triss would be better. but in every single way she's been worse.

#twist rambles #hi. sorry the mental illness is exploding im literally having to pause reading so much bc it is making me so angry. #i love seeing at the point where i gave up on being coherent w capitalization like. no one is going to read thru this but consider i need #to get the frustration out basically so <3 #guy thats like haha i would never just rant abt this on main <3 and then does so hours later bc the frustration is just so bad. like it + #could be such an amazing series but the way women r handled. bad. #ask to tag #sorry im just ough. i needed to get this out so i could keep trucking through reading. but its literally just like?? the feminist thing for #triss to do is obviously just make sure ciri knows the female beauty standards and its so :/ #the stuff w geralt isnt even like. everything im putting in this silly rant bc i legit do not remember all of it bc the horrors r just + #stacking and multiplying nonstop lmao. its just been really frustrating bc im mainly reading this for ciri and geralt but the romance + #subplots have been fucking HELL. anyways sorry for the long post under the cut etc :)

[iloveyoumorethansoup]

I think it’s time for some good old fashioned journaling since I can post again

#so. as y’all know the reason I’ve been largely avoiding posting and interacting with me is bc one of my friends thought it was funny to #find my account right? however as a joke a few weeks ago she was like haha look at what I can see #naturally that made me incredibly unhappy and until I could have a serious conversation with her I all but stopped speaking to her #i had a conversation with her and pretty much put it down to there are things I do not want to share with you and you severely went against #my privacy and this is not something I will get over if forgive. hopefully eventually I will move past it #and she was pretty much like oh yeah my bad it was a bad taste joke didn’t know u cared so much #like. I’ve been saying for Years. do not come find me or it will end our friendship. to any close friend I’ve come across #i genuinely don’t think she understood why I was so upset just due to the fact that she fundamentally doesn’t care about things #like she does not have interests. that’s not something she does. when she has an occasional one she would rather die than admit she cares #and in general it’s whatever. u do u. but when that stops you from seeing how much other people care about things? we have problems #she literally said to my face oh sorry I didn’t know tumblr was your deepest darkest secret #like. you’ve got to be kidding me #she wasn’t defensive when I tried to talk to her. but I really don’t think she got why I’m so upset about this. like not a clue #she was just like. ok. my bad. i won’t be back and I haven’t been back #which. was a lie she has been and I called her out on that and she literally was like. well. except for that #and she asked me like oh do u have anything else u wanna say and I was like not now but maybe later #i knew I wasn’t going to just forgive her. i know my trust isn’t just rebuildable I have trust issues as it is. but I don’t think that #conversation fixed a single thing. i pretty much just let her know I was upset with her. that is all that accomplished. #i don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget this honestly. and quite frankly I have no wish to continue to speak to her as it is #unfortunately my future sits with her as she’s moving to college with me next year where I’ll have to rely on her for rides and then to #cali where we’re moving in with several friends #this isn’t something that can be fixed. and she just keeps FaceTiming me like we’re good and I keep declining #I’m just so torn bc honestly my go to for this situation is cut off contact no one is worth me losing my sense of privacy. no one #but I don’t think I can here. as it stands I will be relying on her. i guess I could do it myself but it will be a massive pain #as cold as it seems to weigh someone’s existence in my life in an unemotional pros and cons list unfortunately I haven’t the luxury of #looking at this from an emotional standpoint. though to be fair. I’ve learned to not rely on my emotions for decisions #soup talks #girl hit me right in the worst sort of trauma I have and I finally have the opportunity to do what I wish I could have done years ago. leave #start fresh. start with people who don’t know me yet who will respect my privacy. who make me feel safe

[dangoulains-devotion]

every time I have to wade through inane ship wars where people are willfully ignorant to the depth and facets of cloud strife's character, circumstance, and story just so I can find some cool screenshots or fanart my 'cloud is ace' agenda simply grows more potent out of spite

#rebirth literally said in bold letters he has multiple feelings. like humans do #and yet in the year 2024 i am still forced to see 'this ship was canon since 1997 unlike the other one' #do you have a brain that you use #are you capable of actually delving into the details of a character #without reducing them to barbie dolls that get smacked off one another #i just want to look at cool fanart man #dont even get me STARTED on how zack slots into all this #my boy has not haunted the narrative for you to go and ignore character developments like this #this is all coming out more blunt than i would normally try to write things #but brother i am so tired #i could write a whole post on how it is very real and normal for humans to feel affection for more than 1 person #and how it manifests in cloud and the whys #if the game itself is somehow not clear enough to you then you are simply choosing to close your eyes at that point #trying to act superior and objective about your ship while ignoring the material you claim to have gotten your Objective Facts™ from... #good gravy. #shipping is supposed to be a fun thing secondary to enjoying the content #not a primary objective to use it to argue with people #i would say peace and love on planet gaia but im sure some people would read it as peace and you can only love one person at a time forever #on planet gaia. haha. #anyway...... now that that's out my system i can be at peace again #shout out 2 my fellow multishippers who take this bountiful wealth of content and have fun with it #i think im gonna replay rebirth's story soon #want to see how much more i can pick out about new/updated approaches to characterization #rocket town will be very interesting in part 3 i think #yuffie too with wutai supposedly becoming a much more fleshed out thing #if this post somehow breaches containment: #if your first thought is to um actually me and whip out 'evidence'. i am not going to give you rhe time of day #because my rambling clearly went over your head and im not interested in 1sided discussion where i am being talked at rather than to #anyway have fun stop wasting time arguing and pls look forward to remake part 3 where i lose my mind over vincents waist. again #look what you did you raised my blood pressure enough to hit the tag limit. anyway peace and love on planet g-

[peapod20001]

When I love a song, I’ll love it forever

#random post #smth i thought about earlier. yknow. I have a hard time picking favorites with literally everything #I also have what I SAY is a favorite of mine. but I have a hard time really pinpointing whats number 1 in my brain #like. I love lots of things. I like different aesthetics and clothing and art mediums and movies and shows and books and music and people #but it’s difficult trying to find the favorite. some things are easier cus there’s more that I DONT like so it kinda singles out an option #like with music. I love LOTS of music. but what does it mean when smth is a favorite? I don’t have a favorite genre cus I have songs I love #from all over. even ones I haven’t heard yet. music overall is one of my favorite things. I’m not joking when I say it’s a love language #I love the melodies and beats and rhythms and lyrics and voices. always and forever will have a place in my heart and mind #I hate questions that want to know favorites. isn’t it enough to just show you instead? to share everything with you? why do you need one #single thing to know exactly who I am? wouldn’t you get me better if you spent a day with me instead? #I can’t remember everything of importance to me. not all in one single moment. if I went through my playlists and told you what songs I love #and why. what books I love and why. what anything I love and why. you’d find that I’m a bit undefined. I’m an artist and a creator. strong #yet weak imagination. sometimes think better in the abstract and other times do better with what’s set in stone #I love sharing things with people. I wish people would engage more with what I share sometimes. but I never hold it against em or hate them #if they don’t haha. often I feel down when ppl don’t engage with what I share. I know people aren’t obligated to do things but. yknow. it’s #my heart in a platter. splayed our for everyone. bits of me I want to share. what I want people to see. I’ve sat down with people to share #music I like. one friend said a song I like was scary. some people make faces at what I play. some have paid it no mind at all. they don’t #even know how important to me sharing something like that is. hell. how important me sharing ANYTHING is. it’s so easy to hide away #everything about myself. yet here I am trying my hardest to open myself up. yea. wish I was able to connect with someone like that #in person I mean. I guess. I just want to lay down with someone and play music we love. explain why we love it. or try to understand why #idk I’m getting rambly. I just want to do new things forever. and relive the first time everytime #this isn’t a vent or anything. just thinking and writing as I do. typing helps me to keep my mind on track. a bit at least. as much as one #with a brain like mine can havagahhaga. I wonder if anyone actually reads through my tag rambles in their entirety. I know it looks daunting #so I don’t blame you if you can’t or don’t feel like it. it won’t kill me if my words are lost in the void #haha anyways yea :> thinking lots

[fagoutboy]

<_<

#I just feel like actually fuckingcrazy i dont know its like my senior year delusions all over again HAHA! #i feel alone but like quite literally like im alone in the world the only person alive and like nobody else is real #because why does no one talk to me why do i not exist to anyone #I have no friends...as usual but its like. HAHAHA Every time i see people post abt being friends w their mutuals i wanna..tear my hair out #Because i dont have that with anyone....like actual deep bonds and stuff.i feel like no one cares and no one would notice if i was gone #but like. quite literally .like not even in the normal way people say this or whatever like i feel like I DONT EXIST #Whatever whatever whatever whatever its fine . i cant stand myself this is so pathetic

[tizeline]

Presenting: The AU I accidentally created OOPSIE!! 😬😬😬

And yes, I know, it's another Seperation AU, and yes YES, I KNOW, they're a bit overdone at this point, bUT LISTEN!! That's precisely how I ended up in this situation!!!

So there's a lot of Seperation AUs exploring a lot of different scenarios with the turtles being raised, well, seperately. I've seen quite a few of them at this point, and despite whatever the combination is when it comes to turtle + parental figure, I'm sure I'm not the only one who has noticed a pattern of specifically Donnie often being raised by a villain. Which makes sense, he has a tendency to put on this evil-mad-scientist-act in the show, so of course a lot of us want to see what Donnie would actually be like as a proper antagonist. But that just made me think think of the opposite possibility, of Donnie being the singular good guy while his brothers are all bad guys. Mind you, I'm sure SOMEONE must've thought of this concept before me, but I haven't seen it! So here we are!

In this AU (which doesn't have a name so don't ask!) Splinter only managed to yoink Donnie during The Incident™, so he ended up an only child, while Raph, Leo and Mikey were raised by Draxum. I also imagine Draxum being at least a decent dad considering the circumstances, so the kids he raised ended up with pretty similar personalities to what they have in canon.

Because of that we get Hero Donnie who acts all villainous cuz he's a total theaterkid, and Villain Raph, Leo and Mikey who act all heroic cuz they honestly believe they're doing the right thing in literally destroying all of humankind and as a result developed an intense case of main character syndrome.

Anyway here's some references-

I don't know how far I'll explore this AU. I fully intended to just make like one or two posts rambling about the basic concept, but when I was drawing these images my brain went into full Brain Blast mode and I started coming up with a bunch of other ideas so uh... we'll see how this turns out later I guess haha

#Tiz Sep AU #tizel art #tizel talk #my art #illustration #digital art #tmnt #rottmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt fanart #tmnt au #rottmnt au #rotttmnt seperation au #raph #leo #donnie #mikey #rise raph #rise leo #rise donnie #rise mikey #april o'neil #rise april