#my initial idea pans out the same way and mostly serves as a way to. explain her thoughts in the moment ig?

[harrysloveboat]

John B’s Girl | JJ Maybank Fic

Summary: JJ Maybank was absolutely screwed. So detrimentally screwed. John B was going to actually end him. The blonde haired surfer had a thing for his best friend’s girl, (Y/N) Cameron. And when JJ notices something he shouldn’t, all bets are off.

Word Count: 6.8K, (18+, Minors DNI, Mature Audience)

Warnings: Smut, rough sex, choking, semi-public sex, cheating, dirty talking, thigh riding, car sex, mention of toys, alcohol, p in v, unprotected sex, oral sex (fem receiving), degrading, Dark!JJ, JJxReader, John BxReader, Cameron!Reader, sprinkles of fluff included, I think I might’ve made Dark!John B too by accident, etc.

Please read warnings before continuing. Really tempted to make a second part if anyone wants it! The ending kinda makes me think a second part is just necessary. Mostly unedited.

Constructive criticism and requests open on my page. I write about Harry, 5SOS, Outer Banks, and TSITP! Thank you x

It’s been an entire week of watching (Y/N) Cameron unraveling before JJ’s blue eyes.

JJ has no idea how the girl got herself into this predicament, and he certainly doesn’t understand how he’s been the only one out of his friends to notice what’s been going on between John B and his girlfriend.

Actually he does understand why, but he refuses to admit it. How could he ever come clean about the way his body ached when she was near? Or how his heart thumped out of his chest when she would accidentally brush her bare skin against his during hot summer days on the H.M.S. Pogue. Even the tender way she’d brush loose strands of blonde hair from his forehead in passing would send shocks of electricity to every corner of his body.

But this annoyingly long week was painfully different from the rest.

(Y/N) had done something on Monday.

JJ wasn’t sure what, but he knew something she had done had sent John B off the deep end. Because for the whole day, John B wouldn’t spare a kind glance her way. No matter how many times she’d initiate a conversation, nudge his arm, intertwine their hands, or even sit on his lap, John B was an absolute rock. His responses were short and curt and his eyes would focus on anything but her.

The next day is when John B really enacted his revenge.

(Y/N) was doing everything she could to get back into his good graces. That morning, she woke up early to stop at the grocery store. Buying so many things that JB’s fridge was fully stocked when she returned.

Breakfast was her first attempt. There was bacon crisping in the oven, sending a mouthwatering aroma to every Pogue in The Chateau. She was scrambling eggs on the stovetop for everyone, with a smaller pan on the side that contained eggs with cheese. By the time the toast was popping out of the toaster oven, everyone had come alive with growling stomachs.

JJ and Pope had dug right in, surprised but also very wonderfully pleased by the first home cooked meal they’d had in a while. Kie had given her a big hug first, requesting that (Y/N) wake her up next time to lend her a hand. But even as John B was served his favorite eggs with cheese for just him, he gave them the tiniest nibble, before pushing his plate away.

“Not hungry,” he shrugged moving on to a refreshing morning shower instead with even as much as a sympathetic glance back.

Kie and Pope were lost in conversation, but JJ had been a witness to it all. More than anything, he noticed the way her entire demeanor deflated as John B stalked off. The excited glint in her eyes was extinguished in haste. The crinkles at the corner of her eyes vanished alongside her smile. His heart squeezed at the sight. JJ had wanted nothing more than to scoop her up in his arms and pepper her with millions of soft, thankful kisses. Nothing she could’ve done would’ve been enough for JJ to evoke the same reaction out of her if she was his.

That afternoon, however, is when things took a completely opposite direction.

Energized by their hearty breakfast, they all decided it was a perfect sunny day to do some fishing and swimming. Kie and Pope had canonballed into the clear blue water when it happened. JJ was grabbing a beer from the cooler as (Y/N) sat next to John B who was laying on a towel, perched at the front of the boat.

She had leaned down to speak something privately into his ear. Except he shook his head, face devoid of any emotion. “You’ve been a bad girl (Y/N). You don’t deserve any attention,” his hushed dismissal was the only thing JJ managed to catch. The pout on her plump lips and furrowed eyebrows told JJ everything he needed to know. The gears clicked together in his head almost too quickly.

(Y/N), out of all people, had a praise kink that John B was currently exploiting.

The realization went straight to his crotch, his swimming trunks horribly constricting for the entire day. It made so much sense. She aimed to please, getting so excited when someone was happy with something she did. He honestly felt foolish for not catching on sooner. If someone asked JJ if he jacked off to her sweet voice begging him to destroy her in his imagination, he would immediately deny it.

By Wednesday, JJ was hooked.

There was no conversation that could capture his focus for long. Every moment of his time was devoted to her. The urges JJ had to rush to her and be her new source of comfort were becoming overwhelming but so was the need to bend her over any flat surface. He was on the verge of being diagnosed as bipolar with the amount of times his mood would swing. Every disheartened expression or bite of a lip had JJ physically twitching to remedy her frustration. But anytime she’d sit on John B’s lap and search for forgiveness with gentle touches and suggestive whispers, JJ would have to excuse himself to hide the new semi he was sporting.

(Y/N) and John B cuddled together during a movie night on Thursday evening. JJ thought for a split second that (Y/N) had finally wormed her way through John B’s walls. It didn’t even make sense to him how his best friend had managed to hold out for so long when she was completely irresistible. A little part of him was curious to know what she had done that originally started this. What had angered JB enough to drag this punishment out? By the relaxed tone throughout the movie, he figured he’d never get the answer to that question. At least he’d be able to go back to regular conversations instead of consistently excusing himself to the restroom.

But of course, JJ never seems to catch a break.

Kie had disappeared from the living room at some point to sleep in the guest bedroom. Choosing a comfortable bed over morning neck pain. Pope was on the couch, mouth drooling onto the cushion that was propped under his head. JJ had been basically forced into the sleeping bag on the floor with one measly pillow. Aside from the discomfort of the wooden floor, he had managed to fall into a deep sleep. There was a sudden noise lulling him awake.

Soft, harsh pants stirred him from his dreams.

The movie was still playing on the screen, but the volume had been turned down to leave background noise. Even with the quiet chatter, JJ heard the distinct, “please John B,” that fell from (Y/N)‘s lips followed by an angry scoff. His blue eyes peeked open, just the slightest bit, only to feel like he could pass out from what was occurring on the single seat next to the couch.

(Y/N) was sitting on John B’s thigh, hips grinding down at a rapid pace to chase her end. All the while JB was focused on the screen not paying any mind to the horny girl riding him. JJ could see the wet stains on her cheeks, beads of sweat falling down her forehead. She was moving with urgency, obviously close to her orgasm.

“Can’t believe you have the audacity to beg me to touch you after what you did,” John B muttered furiously in response to her. The only crack in his hard interior that let JJ know he was affected by (Y/N)’s actions was the tight grip at her hip. His other hand was lazily holding the remote on the beige armrest to exaggerate his disinterest. “I’m sorry- I’m so sorry,” she pleaded as her hips faltered. The closer she got to her end, the haze in her mind would betray her. Slowing her movements just as she was on the verge of falling into the abyss and traitorously bringing her back.

He snicked at her, feeling her feeble attempts to get herself off on his thigh. She had wet through her panties hours ago, drenching John B’s thigh and the inner corners of hers. Her apologies were falling on deaf ears. “I’m not helping you. You’re lucky I’m even letting you cum when you’ve been such a bad girl. Sluts like you don’t deserve it.” His filthy words were what did it. Instead of being put off by them, the quickening of her pace and quiet whine that escaped her lips let JJ know that she enjoyed being degraded.

(Y/N)’s movement came to a sharp halt, thighs squeezing around John B as her orgasm washed over her in waves. Her entire body tensed up, face twisting in pleasure. Underneath the over-sized t-shirt her shoulders shook slightly. For the sake of not being caught by the others, it took all her strength to keep the noises at bay while threatening to spill over at any given moment. JJ thinks he might be the one to beg to hear those sounds next. She collapsed against him, scratching at his chest with a small cry when he grinded up against her overstimulated pussy.

JJ didn’t sleep for the rest of the night.

He found himself in the shower again hours later, fisting his cock repeatedly until he was cumming harder than he ever thought he could.

Friday night was finally the last nail hammered into his coffin.

The party was booming, every Kook, Pogue, and Touron joining together for an epic get together at the Boneyard. Alcohol was influencing the rager, people dancing around the bonfire with high spirits. They had all ridden in the Twinkie together but gradually dispersed throughout the night. Pope was trying, and failing, to flirt with a brown-haired Touron who was too drunk to understand. She was cute but clueless. Kie was dancing in the crowd with John B, enjoying the music and winding down from an eventful day at The Wreck. She was oblivious to the fact that the nonchalant guy in front of her wasn’t paying a lick of attention.

JJ was leaning against a palm tree, crushing a can of beer in his hand. He had been in a fowl mood all day, snapping at everyone over the smallest of inconveniences. He couldn’t help it, nothing he had done was able to satisfy his persistent hard-on. Any time (Y/N) was within his eyesight, even momentarily, all the blood would rush down between his legs. Every hair flip made JJ want to grab it into a ponytail and tug hard. Inches of exposed skin silently requesting to be marked by his teeth. JJ was so sexually frustrated that he was honestly considering taking some girl home tonight.

The idea was tempting as his blue irises raked through the crowd. There were some good options available. Sophie, his old friends with benefits, had been eyeing him all night. A red haired girl had flirted with him when he retrieved his second beer. Shit there was even a drunk Kook that had been throwing herself at him if push came to shove. Still, none of them were what he actually craved deep in his bones. Subconsciously, JJ found the girl he had been really after.

(Y/N) was seated on a log in front of the fire wearing a white flowy dress that ended at the middle of her thighs. It had two straps at the top that tied behind her neck. She was free of make-up, her natural features mesmerizing JJ even from a distance. Her silky hair was blowing past her shoulders in the soft night breeze.

The fire lit up her face with hues of red and orange. Her head was tilted up slightly, eyes sealed shut. She seemed distracted, mind far away from the craziness surrounding her. JJ’s head shifted to the side in curiosity as he noted the odd behavior. He watched as (Y/N) pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, biting down harshly. Her hands had a death-like grip on the wood below her. Something was clearly wrong.

A surge of worry passed by JJ, wondering if the girl was okay. This week had been rougher on her than any of the other Pogues knew. He was the only one besides John B that was aware of the inner turmoil she was experiencing. This meant, Kie, (Y/N)’s best friend and confidante wasn’t clued into this secret that JJ had unintentionally stumbled upon. There was no way she could know the girl needed somebody. Deciding that he needed to take it upon himself to check up on her, JJ’s legs moved before his brain did.

He took a couple of strides in her direction with no decipherable sentence coming to mind. JJ had to think a little more instead of acting on a whim. He found comfort for his nerves in the red hat being snugly placed on his hair backwards before finally sitting down next to her. “Hey, you okay?” JJ’s tone held more compassion than usual, opting to rip off the band aid. Their normal playful banter was replaced by genuine emotion that JJ was struggling to contain.

(Y/N) didn’t even notice him sit until his voice was bringing her back from the pleasure she was floating off into. Her eyes were dark, filled with lust as they landed on JJ’s. Now that he was actually sitting next to her, able to properly focus and analyze her behavior, the color drained from his face as he became all too aware. Her thighs were pressed together tightly, nails digging into the wood. (Y/N) was breathing heavily, vibrations from the plug John B had inserted before leaving The Chateau were teasing her. Her boyfriend held the remote to the stupid thing and he had been turning it off and on all night. Sometimes she’d be in a casual conversation and have to excuse herself because he’d purposefully turn on the highest setting. Even making her spill a little bit of beer down her chin in front of Kie.

By now, (Y/N) was desperate. She was squirming in her seat, holding back the pornographic moans this device had taken her to. After withholding sex from her the entire week and choosing to insert this new toy he had purposefully disappeared earlier to buy, she was like a rabid animal. The intensity of repeatedly being brought to the brink and then cut off had broken any sense of normalcy she had managed to maintain. The fiery passion in her eyes was undeniable. “I-I’m okay- yeah,” (Y/N) practically squeaked out, one hand moving to crumble the hem of her dress in a fist.

John B was insatiable from where he stood. Although he was well aware of the state he had led his girlfriend into, just the sight of JJ sitting next to her set him off. His hand reached into his jean pocket, clasping the cheap plastic and turning on the max speed with several clicks to the plus sign on the right. It was stupid and idiotic, but the jealousy that flared didn’t let him act clearly.

(Y/N) tried to contain a gasp as her body jumped slightly at the sudden change. She knew exactly what John B was doing. He was marking his territory in front of JJ, who by the look in his face obviously knew what was going on. Without an inkling about how JJ felt, John B was still going out of his way to prove (Y/N) was his. Making her cum inches away from his best friend.

JJ knew it. Saw her eyes roll to the back, her mouth drop open and nose scrunch up. The pleasure overcame her body. The orgasm ripped through her body after being edged for so long. Her toes curled as John B forced her to ride out her high in front of him with no mercy. She was unable to hide the twitch of her thighs. Tears from the pleasure mixed in with embarrassment. JJ was frozen, rock solid in his cargo shorts. His face gave nothing away except his acknowledgment of the situation. The words to describe the hunger he felt had yet to be invented. At the same time his outrage at John B’s intentional deed simmered over.

The tension in the air was palpable with deafening silence consuming them. There was no ounce of awkwardness with the way both of them were stuck in their heads. She swallowed hard, looking away as her bottom lip trembled. Seeing as John B had no intentions of turning it off, only lowering the setting, she chose to retreat. There was no explanation that could hide or sugarcoat the truth. (Y/N) got up muttering an unintelligible excuse before she was disappearing behind the fire with a walk of shame.

JJ’s entire body was hot with adrenaline and need. A primal need to fuck the girl into oblivion was no longer in his control. The pure desire radiating off her body had pushed JJ past the boundary of respect. John B smirking victoriously towards Kie did nothing to aid JJ, only encouraged him to follow in the path that (Y/N) had headed towards.

She had found safety next to the Twinkie, crying freely into the crease of her elbow against the window. The vibrator was still going, overstimulating her yet she knew better than to take it out without being told to. John B had gone too far, giving in to the green eyed monster that veered his head. Her body was almost clinging to the van at this point when calloused fingers ran up the back of her thigh.

The warm touch alerted her to the presence of somebody behind her. (Y/N)’s back arched slightly on instinct, finally getting what she was craving. She felt so depraved, so starved. Just a simple graze had goosebumps spreading like wildfire. “John B- please- I-I can’t anymore. Take it out,” she cried pathetically, begging for some form of release.

JJ groaned at the tone of her voice, so ready and desperate. It was taking all his willpower to not bend her over right now and ram himself inside of her. Without speaking, his hand continued to travel up her thigh painfully slow. In her daze she missed the hesitancy in the touch that would’ve been hasty and quick had it been John B. His eyes were trained on the dress that was hiking up, exposing a delicious set of red lace panties. Precum stained his boxers just from the sight. JJ grabbed a handful of her ass cheek tightly, reveling in the way she pushed her ass out to him and whined.

“I’m gonna warn you right now (Y/N). If I’m the one that takes it out, I’m going to fuck you so hard that you’re going to forget what his name is,” JJ growled into her ear, hot breath washing over her hypersensitive skin. (Y/N) recognized the voice immediately, feeling the cold rings that belonged to this particular Pogue cooling her ass through the pain of the grip. Her forehead fell onto the window, a pitiful whimper responding to JJ’s offer. It was wrong, so so wrong. But the bulge pressing into her ass had her eyes fluttering shut.

JJ’s logic had quite literally left planet Earth. The only thing on his mind was her. The fear of rejection wasn’t even present. His hand confidently found a home in the curve of her hip, squeezing it tightly as he ground his cock into her ass pushing her further against the van. They both moaned, any hesitation fully dissipating with the wind.

“Take it out- take it out JJ,” she gasped, his name sounding like heaven as it fell from her lips. His new mission was to hear her scream it. JJ moved with newfound purpose, flipping her over harshly before he crouched down. “Hold your dress up and spread your legs,” the dominant tone of JJ’s voice sent a new rush of slickness down her thighs.

This was JJ, her boyfriends best friend, pulling down her panties in one swift move and licking his lips ready to devour her. “JJ please,” she was so vocal, feeding into his own filthy nature. What really almost made him cum in his black boxers was the sight before him. Her pussy was glistening, wrapped tightly around the softly buzzing vibrator. Her clit was swollen, puckering and aching. He licked his lips, imprinting this image in his brain.

JJ grabbed onto the end of it, teasingly pulling it out of her and back in which earned him a breathless moan. Her hips pushed down against it automatically, chasing the feeling. “You’ve been such a good girl all night, taking it so well,” JJ’s words had her free hand gripping the handle to the door. Without even letting her process it, his fingers were replacing the vibrator which found solace in JJ’s back pocket.

He shoved two fingers in deep, coating them with her previous orgasm in a matter of seconds. JJ nudged every corner, hitting every spot reachable in this position. He moved with skill, determination clear in the way his lips wrapped around her nub and sucked. (Y/N)’s breath was knocked out of her lungs at the sensation. Her jaw slacks from the pleasure as the spark at the pit of her belly grows into an untamable fire. JJ moved like a man who needed this to survive. He flattened his tongue against her clit, the tip poking into the entrance where his fingers were sliding in and out with ease. Finally tasting her sweetness forced a moan to ripple through him and into her.

(Y/N)’s head fell back against the window hard enough to hurt and yet she didn’t feel it at all. All her senses were hyper focused on the man between her legs. Each flicker of his tongue would make her knees go out. She would’ve been on the ground already had it not been for JJ’s hand digging into her thigh to keep her up as well as open. A particular curve of his finger had a high pitched noise tumbling out. JJ didn’t miss a beat, continuing with a new rhythm as he memorized what made her walls clench around him.

“I-I’m gonna- JJ, fuck,” she couldn’t even finish her sentence but he knew exactly what she was going to say. Everything became blurry, her chest heaving from the change in his movements. The muscles in her thighs tense, attempting to close subconsciously but JJ refuses to let them. His fingers dig into her thigh so hard they’ll be bruises in the shape of his hand tomorrow. Her climax was rapidly approaching, knot tightening in her abdomen.

His tongue circled her relentlessly. Everything wrong with what they were doing secretly inflamed her heat. (Y/N)’s mind went hazy from the increasing thrusts of his fingers. The pleasure exploding inside of her in a gut twisting way. JJ watched her face twist from the blissful waves causing her eyes to close. The intensity made her mind go blank as a string of curses were spoken. He forced her to ride out her high by lapping up everything that landed on his tongue. He savored the taste, unforgivingly continuing until her body was shaking from the stimulation.

(Y/N) didn’t even get a break. She was unable to catch a breath with JJ’s merciless assault. Her hand moved from the door to his head, pushing the cap off in favor of grabbing his blonde hair. He finally eased up when he was satisfied, pulling his mouth away and not hesitating to lick his lips. “Taste so fucking good princess,” JJ breathed out while his fingers gradually came to a stop. She squeezed his hair, a whimper coming out. It was hard to believe this was JJ Maybank below her, eyes gleaming after eating her out alive.

He stood up, moving the hand that had left imprints to fist her loose hair and tilt her head up. “Suck it off my fingers,” he demanded. The authoritative tone left her with no option but to open her mouth. Her tongue slipped between the two fingers sucking them clean without breaking eye contact. JJ’s already darkening eyes were pitch black now, hints of blue disappearing at her eagerness.

“You like that don’t you? Sucking your cum off my fingers. Wonder how your little boyfriend would feel if he saw you right now,” JJ taunted her. Tears brimmed the edges of her eyes but her thighs moved to shut. JJ’s knee shot out before they could, grinding up against her overly sensitive mound. He was rewarded with a delicious moan that reminded him of his leaking member that was still trapped. “Say it princess. Whose gonna fuck you and make you cum a second time in a row?” The fingers that were in her mouth moved to wrap around her throat. He gave her the freedom to speak, his forehead dangerously close to hers. Their lips could meet if she moved just a little closer. The curiosity to find out what kissing him would feel like distracted her. The soft squeeze at her throat broke her out of the trance, reminding her to respond.

(Y/N) nodded for no reason, hips pushing down against JJ’s thigh to show how much she still wanted him. “You JJ. You’re gonna fuck me and make me cum again. Please- want it so bad, want your cock inside of me,” the neediness in her tone sent JJ into a frenzy. No imagination could come close to the real thing. His neck shot forward, their lips molding together in a passionate kiss. They moved in sync while JJ’s hand slid down, pulling at the strings of her dress to undo the knot in a swift move. His hand skimmed further down, kneading and squeezing every inch of her skin from her curves to her ass.

She was mewling in his mouth, every caress weakening her. It was hard to feel guilty with the way the rough pads of his fingers ran across her scorching hot skin. Her hands moved to unbutton his shorts falling prey to her desires. “Need it J,” the sincerity is what snapped him back into action.

JJ untangled their bodies to open the Twinkie, taking her hand so that she was standing in front of him and could go in first. Without saying it, he placed his palm at the center of her back. A soft push let her know to get onto all fours on the soft fabric of the seats. The van door slammed shut behind them before he was shoving his clothes off with urgency. A thought lit up like a light bulb inside his head as he finished undressing.

“If you want me to give you what needy sluts like you deserve, you need to answer my question,” JJ stated seriously as his hands tucked under the top of her dress. Now with the strap off, he was able to peel off the dress from top to bottom. The panties that had only been able to reach her mid thigh before JJ lost it, slipped off alongside the dress. Confusion settled into (Y/N)’s expression. Her right cheek was pressed into the seat, only getting a small glimpse of JJ’s face. “I’ll answer anything JJ please,” the apprehension as to what the question could be was drowned out by the throbbing between her legs. The anticipation was eating her alive and he was on an unholy plight to push every single one of her buttons.

JJ smirked devilishly while leaning down to press his bare chest against her back. His cock was standing up, solid from days of built up tension. He slid between her wet folds, earning moans from the both of them. “What did you do that made John B so mad?” He whispered into her ear before resting his forehead on the back of her head. His lips ghosted over the skin at the nape of her neck sending chills down her spine. It took a moment for her to put together what he was saying. The realization dawned on her face, unable to admit what he wanted to hear. JJ’s suspicion grew with the way her breathing stuttered.

“Doesn’t matter J, just fuck me,” she attempted to sway him away from the topic but being told to ignore it only made him more persistent. “Ah, ah,” he tsked in a disapproving tone. JJ moved his hips to continue teasing her, gradually sliding between her lips and get himself wet with all her juices. He’d move so far down that his tip would just barely nudge against her hole and then proceed to slide back. His hands disappeared around (Y/N)’s sides, grabbing hold of her breasts and massaging them roughly. His fingertips found her already hardened nipples, tugging and pulling to get his point across. “You want me to fuck your tight cunt? You’re gonna have to tell me sweet girl. Because I’ll walk away right now.”

(Y/N) whined in frustration. JJ’s attempts to make her comply worked all to well. Her heart was racing with impatience and every nerve ending was shot. She could feel just how long and big he was. It made her tighten pathetically around nothing. She wanted to cry to express the distress she was feeling. His hands played at her nipples, fogging her mind up even further. A high pitched noise waved the white flag as she gave in to his attack. The risk of JJ leaving right now outweighed the shitstorm that inevitably followed the truth. “I flirted with you Sunday night.”

JJ paused, his hope flourishing into fact. What JJ had deemed a concocted idea was in fact more than just a sexually fueled imagination.

(Y/N) walked into the kitchen, hair wet from a recent shower. Despite an exhausting day surfing at the beach, she still managed to walk with a bounce in her step and a smile on her lips. Her attitude was always contagious and distracting. “Hey J, not coming out for the movie?” she questioned, digging into the freezer. All the Pogues were camped out in the living room to watch a new movie while JJ was perched on the counter top with a beer in hand.

He ran his fingers through his hair, watching as she pulled out the last chocolate fudge bar which halted his answer. His eyebrow raised as she whirled around to him. She removed the plastic casing with no rush in the world, before wrapping her plump lips around the bar. JJ’s blue eyes trailed downwards, captivated by the way she bobbed her head up and down in such a suggestive way. Her question was long forgotten with a lick of his dry lips.

“That’s my bar,” JJ stated avoiding a comment on the affect her actions were having on him. He was also technically correct. Nobody else ate the fudge bars except for him. Although, he had been noticing that he was reaching the end of the box quicker than normal. Apparently he discovered the culprit. It was hard to actually take it seriously though, not when he could swear there was a mischievous glint in her eyes. Like she purposefully put on a show for him.

(Y/N) simply tilted her head to side biting her bottom lip. “And what are you going to do about it?” The question was innocent. Yet it sounded so risqué. Like she was tempting him to take it further than that. His muscles twitched to grab her right there. But John B clearing his throat from the kitchen entrance snapped JJ out of whatever that was.

He was too consumed by her lips, her doe eyes, the way her cheeks hollowed around the bar, all of it. JJ had barely noticed John B in that moment. The thought that he might’ve heard or seen anything didn’t even cross JJ’s mind. He just quickly got up and rushed past them to the living room. He had written the whole thing off. It was easier to convince himself that he had probably imagined the whole thing rather than feeding into a delusion where she had actually teased him.

JJ had been so right though. He had read her cues perfectly. Not only had she been flirting with him, but it was also the reason that John B was infuriated. The more he dwelled on the thought, the more his heart thumped louder. They all joked and flirted amongst themselves, John B did with Kie. It was all harmless. So John B getting mad at this moment meant he felt threatened by JJ. Like (Y/N) had given him a reason to worry.

The admission made something snap inside of JJ. A flood of emotions surged forward as the dam he had built to contain them collapsed under the strength of her honesty. He quickly removed his hands from her body to lift himself up. As promised, JJ lined himself up with her slick entrance. Any desire to see her down on her knees would have to be put on hold for next time. There was no way he could put this off any longer. He took just a second to nudge his tip passed the barrier and back to hear the starved whimper that she was unable to hold in. Finding sick pleasure in her shameless need for him. “Please JJ.” Without warning, right after she spoke, he slammed his hips forward. He forget everything except the feeling of being enveloped by velvety tight walls. A loud moan mixed in with a deep groan could be heard from outside the van. He reached deep into her like this, taking her breath away.

The grip around his cock could make him pass out. He muttered an inaudible cuss word, not giving her a second to adjust. JJ pulled out to the tip before shoving himself back inside her and repeating the motion until it grew into a consistent pace. (Y/N) was a broken record of moans and pleas. With every thrust her hips would rut back into him. The anticipation had been replaced with numbing pleasure. Her eyes couldn’t focus on a single thing, completely overwhelmed. His fingers tangled into her hair, shoving her further into the seat.

JJ used the new support to deepen and harden his pace. His hips were jolting into her and sending her forward each time. JJ was failing to hold back, milking every noise out of her sweet lips. The vibrator that was still in the pocket of his shorts that were now located on the floor began to vibrate loudly. JJ smirked viciously, digging into her hip for assistance to ram into her, admiring the way her swollen pussy swallowed his cock in between them. “Do you hear that? John B’s turning up the vibrator while you’re getting stuffed with his best friends cock,” JJ coed before his breath hitched at the tight squeeze his words evoked.

It shouldn’t have turned her on the way it did but she couldn’t help it. Her body reacted before she could. His lewd words reached kinks (Y/N) didn’t even know existed within her. She cried out as his balls slapped against her clit, shooting pangs of intense pleasure up her body. Her legs would be giving out soon, she wouldn’t be able to keep this up. Feeling (Y/N)’s end approaching, JJ fisted her hair and pulled her up against his chest with ease. “Who owns your pretty pussy now (Y/N)?” he panted, his hot breath fanning over the back of her neck at the new proximity.

(Y/N) moaned out loudly as he pounded back into her in this new position. He broke her train of thought before she even had a chance to think of a reply. The hand at her hip smoothed upward, pausing to grope her boob roughly. Her back arched in response with a sharp gasp before he finally landed on her throat. JJ squeezed, digging his fingers into her pressure point and loosening it to remind her to speak. “You JJ. JJ Maybank owns me and my pussy,” (Y/N) yelped hand moving to grip onto the seat while the other reached back into JJ’s blonde locks. JJ growled, increasing his pace when she jumped forward at a certain shift in angle.

Her eyes were glazing over as the fingers at her neck tightened. Their bodies molded together in a matching rhythm. Her hips jutted down to meet every single one of his upward strokes. JJ was using the grip on her neck to lift and slam her back into him. The filthy sounds of their bodies smacking together was the only thing heard in the foggy van. “So fucking tight,” JJ mutters, lips moving to suck a hickey into the back of her neck. Now that he had discovered how close she was with the way her body quivered in his grasp, he wrecked his way inside of her.

Knowing it was a bad idea, (Y/N)‘s head had still tilted to allow him room to mark her. She was a mess of endless mewls and echoed moans, too dazed by the way he was manhandling her. Her end was quickly building, eyes rolling as she fell back onto the curve of his shoulder. His hand left her hair to explore down the middle of her chest. He trailed a finger down her stomach before finally reaching the top of her pussy. His hand cupped her, fingers wrapping around her opening that was still engulfed by his twitching cock. He palmed at her clit, eliciting a loud cry from (Y/N).

“Beg me to make you cum like he can’t,” JJ slowed his hand to show he’d stop in a scarily calm way, making tears spill over from how hopeless she felt. At this point (Y/N) needed the sweet relief as much she needed oxygen in her lungs. “You already made me cum harder than he ever has-,” her breath caught as he dug his palm into her swollen clit at the confession, “I’m all yours JJ- please make me cum.” That was all he needed to apply just enough pressure to leave (Y/N) sputtering. Her eyes went black as the ferocity of her orgasm left her seeing stars. Her entire body writhed from the intensity. JJ groaned at the way her walls tightened around him. She was drifting into clouds of bliss while riding out her high.

It all encouraged him further to his own end. He removed his hand from her beyond sensitive clit to lay her down fully onto her stomach. JJ’s back stayed pressed against her, not slipping out in the slightest bit. With the new position, her walls clamped down on him. He couldn’t refrain from snapping his hips up to bring the unrelenting speed back to life. This time he was chasing his own end, using her warm hole to get himself off. (Y/N) was incoherent under him, utterly fucked out. “That’s it take it,” his hips lost rhythm, “take all my cum,” jerking upwards desperately. He moaned loudly into her ear, thick ropes of his cum painting her insides.

She shuddered feeling him stop as deep as he could go, his cock throbbing with every drop her clenching pussy squeezed out. They were both panting, the temperature in the van was absurdly high. His sweaty body gave out, hiding her naked one under his. She found the weight of it comforting in her post orgasmic fog. It took her a few minutes to properly come back. JJ had leaned up now, pressing electrifying open-mouthed kisses against the dips of her upper back. His hips shifted a little, earning a broken moan from the girl below him.

When he began to move, she leaned back, not wanting to end the fantasy bubble they had created. JJ shushed her with a small smack to her ass that made her jump. Both of them groaned at the sudden movement and he gripped the redden skin where his hand had just spanked. His other hand had vanished under the seat, reaching for vibrator that was still going off wildly. Her pussy spasmed in fear of the vibration inside of her again after the fucking he had just put her through. “Fuck Princess,” JJ hissed almost pinching her ass from the sensitivity.

The one act of kindness JJ had showed (Y/N), was flicking the manual switch to off on the device.

His fingers looped around the end of it, sitting up carefully.

Her ears perked up as the vibrating came to a stop. “JJ what are you doing?” (Y/N)’s shaky, fucked out voice rang through the silence. JJ felt no need to respond pulling out in one swift go. The feeling of emptiness didn’t settle because he was pumping the vibrator back into her, refusing to let any of the evidence vanish. Her muscles tightened, enduring the continued stimulation with a small puff.

“As much as I want to watch my cum drip out of your wrecked cunt..,” JJ’s voice drifted off as his blue irises dropped to the round curve of her ass. He was mesmerized by her worn out body. The marks he had left were giving in to his ego. His hand tenderly rubbed the skin down her back and squeezed at her butt. He’ll never get enough of the feeling.

“You’re gonna keep this vibrator in until John B undresses you at The Chateau. He’s gonna think he’s won, having made you cum in front of me, out of my reach. Then he’s gonna spread your bruised thighs. Shit he’ll even wonder why the vibrator could possibly be turned off. Then when he pulls it out, all of my cum is gonna drip out of his girls pussy for him.”

*****

Read Part 2 here

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it please like, comment, or reblog💕

There will probably be 4 or 5 parts to this. If you’d like to be added to the taglist and kept up to date with this mini-series please comment below🫶🏼

#jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank smut #jj maybank dark smut #dark!jj maybank #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank x kook!reader #JJ maybank x Cameron #john b routledge #john b routledge x reader #john b x reader #dark!john b #dark!john b routledge #john b routledge x kook #john b x kook!reader #kiara carrera #pope heyward #kook!reader #obx fanfiction #obx x reader #obx imagine #jj obx #obx fic #obx #obx cast #outer banks #outer banks fanfiction #outer bank fanfic #outer banks fic

[wordveined]

rolls aimlessly

do i work on wasuremono, do i start my rehash of edelgard’s death in vw, or do i write that drabble based on the ending of azure moon and alternatively to that do i write the version where edelgard takes his hand or--

#‣ author ramblings. #im so TORN #i have too many ideas and not enough hands and brains to write with #hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk #i might. honestly do the third one bc that one has been. stuck in my head since 3h came out #i'd added edie to my multimuse back when i rp'd and my brain was just going OFF with ideas #its basically just. a ficlet novelization of the end of am from edie's pov #starting at the same moment the cutscene does #my initial idea pans out the same way and mostly serves as a way to. explain her thoughts in the moment ig? #in my interpretation anyways #the crossed out bit was........... going to be my excuse to foist her into a post-am world and explore her there #and how things might've gone had she made a different choice that she would then have to live (literally) to grapple with #i kinda wanna hold off on the vw idea until i've finished my replay of vw just to refresh #idk #maybe a replay of cf too #loud shrugging #IN REGARDS TO WASUREMONO..... #im still on chappie 3 at 2000 words and im expecting it to hit minimum 3k before im happy with it so we'll see

[practically-an-x-man]

more thoughts about Wish:

Chris Pine has the best voice acting in this movie by far. Dude could be a legitimately scary villain if the animation wasn't so goofy

I'm telling you dude, the man is acting his ass off but the script and animation style are just ruining all the emotion he's giving

Alan Tudyk is also putting in the work but the script is not working in his favor

Evan Peters needs more lines. His character is legitimately interesting, a young guy who just gave up his wish and is now weirdly lethargic all the time, but they don't explore it enough

Speaking of the animation, it felt very inconsistent. With the King especially we'd get like... one cool moment (like him stopping the globes during his solo song) but then it's immediately cut by these goofy Nimona-as-Ballister type motions

The facial expressions are generally overblown, past the point of "animation stretching the rules" and into "this just looks goofy"

Like I said before, it feels like a patchwork of a dozen other, better Disney movies. My dad and I were watching this going "Tangled. Brave. Frozen. Peter Pan. Mulan."

The third act is like... Rise of the Guardians meets that one scene in Trolls where they sing True Colors

The music is just inconsistent. I think it mainly comes from the fact that they had a pop singer/songwriter do the music rather than a musical theatre composer, there aren't any consistent themes or leitmotifs and it leaves everything feeling very disjointed.

Some of the songs on their own are decently catchy but they just feel like they're trying way too hard

The dialogue is the same way. It serves a purpose but it doesn't quite feel natural or human. Some characters are worse than others and the VO work plays a role but the script itself is just awkward

I think they've just set up too many characters here. If they took two people out of Asha's friend group it would leave more room to develop the others. As it is, I don't remember their names and I have no idea what they want

Except for Asha since she's the main character and Simon because he's the only one who stands out from the rest (again, really interesting character! drastically underutilized!)

Feels like the talking animals are only a thing because it's a Disney movie. Valentino I understand, animal sidekicks are a classic, but the chickens and squirrels and mice are just too much

As a whole there's just... no substance in it. It feels like they've tried to make The Disney Movie and just started making it without even deciding on the themes or characters' journeys at all

It is a heaping pile of deus ex machinas. Every single problem in this movie is resolved in some cheeky little deus ex machina, solely for the sake of a stupid joke or a cheap reference to another Disney reference

If you're gonna copy Lin-Manuel Miranda's composition style anyway... just hire Lin-Manuel Miranda. At least he knows how rhyme schemes and leitmotifs work

This movie is so fucking trite it makes me legitimately angry

Good points I guess (because I refuse to dish on a movie without pointing out something decent about it):

Some of the songs are kinda catchy

There are a few powerful moments of animation, mostly with the King

There are little gold character moments here and there: the King's desperation for power, Simon's character as a whole, Asha's selflessness sparking the initial wish, etc.

Some of the voice acting is legitimately good!

The concept itself is interesting, a King who hoards wishes to make himself more powerful. It had the grounds to be a much better movie, it just didn't act on them very well

The diversity in this movie is genuinely good! We see various demographics of people - race, gender, physical build, disability, etc. - and there's not much "Disney same face syndrome" like we've gotten in other movies.

#out of the two wish-themed movies with harvey guillen in them... yeah no i'm just gonna watch puss in boots

[itsclydebitches]

Hi! I was just watching good omens and I came up with some questions, but I didn't know whom to ask, so I was digging around for go analysis blogs and found you. *takes a breath* So, I was wondering if you had any thoughts on why Heaven's camera angles are the way they are. I noticed that, in heaven, the camera tends to focus on the characters' heads specifically, so they fill most of the screen. Either it's a meta reason or a reference to something (like Newt with the Office) that I'm not getting. That's the main thing, but I've also wondered why exactly Aziraphale uses the verb "fraternize" in the 19th century. It seemed an odd pivot from caring about Crowley's safety to Heaven's rules. Thanks so much!

Hello! Omg yes, let's talk Good Omens cinematography.

First, the obligatory Analysis Disclaimer: I doubt there's a specific interpretation that you're just not getting, some singular, "correct" reading of the scene(s). Two years past release, I'm positive the fandom as a whole has come up with plenty of ideas (I mostly hang on the periphery. I'm far from up to date with GO meta), but any and all of it will, by nature, be subjective. Thus, all I can offer is my own, personal interpretation.

So for me? It's about intimacy.

Not intimacy in the sense of friendship, but rather the broad idea of closeness. Confidentiality. Emotion. Knowledge. Understanding by means of literally getting into the thick of these conversations. I love the camerawork in Heaven (and elsewhere) because the camera itself acts like a person — an additional party to these interactions. And, since we're the ones watching this show via the camera, it makes it feel as if we're peeking into scenes that are otherwise private. Obviously all cinematography does this to a certain extent, the camera is always watching someone or something without acknowledging that we're doing the watching (outside of documentary-esque filmmaking), but GO uses angles and closeups to mimic another person observing these scenes, someone other than the characters involved.

The easiest example I can give here is when Michael makes their call to Ligur. Here, the camera is positioned up on the next landing of the staircase, as if we're sneaking a look down at this otherwise secret call. There's even a moment when the camera pans to the right to look at them through the gap in the railing, briefly obscuring Michael from our view.

Here, a standard expectation of any scene — keep your character in focus — is done away with to instead mimic the movements of someone actually hiding in the stairwell, listening in on the conversation. It creates that feeling of intimacy, as if we're really there with Michael, not just watching Michael through a screen. The camerawork acts like a person overhearing an illicit conversation prior to falling back on mid/closeup shots. We're spying on them.

To give a non-Heaven example, the camera helps us connect with Aziraphale during Gabriel's jogging scene. It's hard to show through screenshots, but if you re-watch you'll see that the camera initially keeps them both in the frame with full body shots, allowing us to compare things like Gabriel's unadorned gray workout clothes with Aziraphale's more stylish outfit; one's good jogging form and the other's awkward shuffle. However, this distance also creates the sense that we're jogging with them, we're keeping pace.

That is, until Aziraphale begins to lag. Then the camera lags too, giving them both the chance to catch up, so to speak.

Until, finally, Aziraphale has to stop completely and the camera, of course, stops with him. We're emotionally attuned to Aziraphale, not Gabriel, and the camerawork reflects that. Even more-so when we cut to a low shot of Gabriel's annoyed huff at having to stop at all, making him appear larger and more imposing. Because to Aziraphale, he is.

This work carries over into Heaven's other scenes. The closeups are pretty much a given since, whether it's Gabriel realizing Aziraphale has been "fraternizing" with Crowley (more on that below!), or Aziraphale choosing to go back to Earth, the scenes in Heaven are incredibly important to the narrative. Closeups allow the viewer to get a good read on each character's emotional state — focusing on minute facial changes as opposed to overall body language — and that fly-on-the-wall feeling is increased as we literally get an up close and personal look at these pivotal moments.

Compare a shot like this one of Gabriel to the line of angels ready for battle. We don't get closeups on any of their faces because their emotions aren't important. Yes, that's in part because they're background characters, not main characters, but a lack of emotion — their willingness to enter this war without question — is also the point of their presence in this scene. So they remain a semi-identical, nearly faceless mass that runs off into infinity down that hallway, not any individual whose inner life we get a peek at via a closeup.

I particularly like Aziraphale's conversation with the angel... general? Idk what to call this guy. He's just gonna be Mustache Angel. But, getting back on track, his scene has a lot of over the shoulder shots which, admittedly, are pretty common. From a practical perspective they're used to help the audience situate both characters in the scene — you're here, you're there, this is how you're spaced during this conversation — but it can also help emphasize that closeness between them. Keeping both characters in the shot connects them and though Aziraphale and Mustache Angel definitely aren't on the same page here, those shots help cue us in to the unwanted intimacy of this moment. They're both angels... even though Aziraphale no longer aligns himself with them. They're both soldiers in a war... but Aziraphale will not fight. This angel has a list of Aziraphale's secrets, including that he once had a flaming sword and lost it... but Aziraphale doesn't want to admit those circumstances to him. This angel wouldn't understand, even if he did. Intimacy here, connection and closeness, is something discomforting because Aziraphale can no longer embrace those similarities. They put him (and us) out of sorts, so when we get them both in frame, that connection creates tension, not relief.

And many of those over the shoulder shots are given sharp angels, or the camera is placed too close to the "off screen" party. Compare a shot like Luke and Rey to Aziraphale and Mustache Angel. Here, Luke is a clean, solid line on the left side of the screen, just enough there to cue us in to where he is in relationship to Ray, In contrast, Mustache Angel's mustache is Too Close and proves rather distracting. Rey and Luke are connecting here over being Jedi with responsibilities to uphold (or at least, Luke will acknowledge that connection later lol); Mustache Angel is forcing a connection with Aziraphale that makes everyone uncomfortable.

We are too close to him here. He feels too close to Aziraphale too. This whole conversation is upsetting and discomforting, pushing Aziraphale to finally choose which side he's on (his own with Crowley). The shots aren't meant to subtly keep the audience from getting lost and then otherwise be unobtrusive, we're supposed to be Very Aware of this angel's body and how close he's getting to the character we've come to identify with — both literally (he's leaning in) and in terms of forcing Aziraphale to finally make his choice.

When Mustache Angel marches forward and gets all up in Aziraphale's face, the camera positions itself behind Aziraphale in a way that makes it feel like we're hiding behind him, with Aziraphale taking up far more of the screen than Luke does. Like the scene with Michael or running with Gabriel, the camera often likes to mimic a "realistic" response to these events. This angry, shouty angel is getting closer, best take a step back and stay out of sight behind Aziraphale, holding his ground.

These closeups also serve as a nice contrast to the wide and longshots we get of Heaven. It's an imposing place with skyscrapers in the distance, lots of steel, immaculate floors, and endless white. It's overwhelming and it's cold. But then we cut to those mid-shots of Gabriel and Michael, telling us that they're in control of it all.

Aziraphale? Aziraphale is not in control. Not now, anyway. When he appears in Heaven we get a longshot to show off this endless void and he's just another, tiny speck in it. If he weren't flailing around — an acting move that likewise helps sell how out of his depth he is — it's unlikely you'd even notice him. Aziraphale's clothing and hair blends in perfectly with the background. He's forgettable. Easily overlooked. Someone to underestimate. And when he moves, he has to come to the camera. We don't cut to Aziraphale to establish control like we do with Gabriel. He's left to awkwardly shuffle up to Mustache Angel until he's finally come into view.

Yet when Aziraphale makes his decision, he aligns himself with the brightest, most colorful, most interesting thing in the room: Earth. Earth, with all its messy individuality, is the antithesis to Heaven's controlled uniformity and a bright blue orb hanging in the midst of all this white helps remind us of that. Aziraphale rejects becoming one of the identical soldiers and instead literally reaches out for the one thing in Heaven that doesn't fit in.

When he leaves, we get an extreme closeup for the first time. Mustache Angel is pissed and as such we not only get a good look at his face in the aftermath of Aziraphale's choice, but that extreme closeup on his mouth as he's shouting too. It's like he's shouting directly at us, the viewer who is currently cheering on Aziraphale's decision. There's a war, dammit... but we don't care. Not in the way he cares, anyway.

So there's a lot! And I could probably go on, but apparently I'm only allowed to add 10 images per post now (tumblr what the actual fuck if anyone knows a way around this please share!) and I've already had to merge a bunch of images like an animal. So let's awkwardly finish up with the duck pond scene.

...without a GIF because they apparently count as images too 🙃

Simply put, I don't think Aziraphale bringing up fraternizing is a pivot from one to the other — from caring about Crowley to caring about Heaven's rules. I mean yes, Aziraphale is lagging behind Crowley in terms of rebellion and a part of him is, at this point, absolutely concerned with how he'll come across to the higherups, but that worry doesn't stem solely from a (now very shaky) desire to obey for the sake of obeying. The thing is, Aziraphale's disobedience is, by default, also Crowley's disobedience. If they're friends and they're ever found out, they'll both get in trouble. Which, we know from the end of Season One, basically means being wiped from existence. That's horrifying! And it's a horror that threatens them both. I don't think Aziraphale cares about rules for the sake of rules; after all, he started off by giving away his sword, lying to God, is currently meeting with Crowley anyway... this angel has always ignored/bent the rules — established and implied — that don't suit him. Rather, he cares about the rules if he thinks they have a chance of being enforced. If there will be consequences for breaking and bending them. This is still about caring for Crowley (as well as saving his own, angelic skin). If they're found out, Crowley dies. And, as we the viewer learn, Heaven was indeed observing them that whole time. There was always legitimate risk attached to this relationship. Aziraphale's fear, hesitance, and at times forceful pleas to stop this stem as much from Aziraphale worrying about Crowley's safety as they do a learned instinct to obey the rules without question. He pushes to end the relationship because the relationship threatens the only thing Aziraphale cares about more than that: Crowley himself.

As for the term "fraternizing," that's a loaded one! I won't go into a whole history lesson here, but suffice to say it has military roots: to sympathize as brothers with an opponent. That is literally what Crowley and Aziraphale are doing. They are an angel and a demon, supposedly innate enemies, supposedly poised for an inevitable war... yet they've formed an incredibly strong kinship. They've both learned to love their enemy, the thing every army fears because, well, then your army won't fight (just as Aziraphale won't). However, beyond the enemy implications, "to fraternize" eventually took on a sexual meaning: to not merely love as a brother, but to lay with the enemy too, usually women from enemy countries (because, you know, heteronormativity). Nowadays, "to fraternize" often implies a sexual component. I've been rewatching The Good Wife lately and in one subplot, the State's Attorney cracks down on fraternization in his office. He doesn't mean his employees are forming bonds with assumed enemies, he means his employees are having sex on his office couch. So Aziraphale's phrasing here carries a LOT of weight. He's both reminding Crowley of their stations in the world — you are a demon, I am an angel, us meeting like this can have formal, irrevocable consequences for us both — as well as, given the fact that this is a love story, drawing attention to the depth of this relationship. They love one another, as more than just friends. Though whether Crowley's scathing "Fraternizing?" is a response to Aziraphale falling back on the technicalities of their positions, or acknowledging a love he's yet to overtly admit and commit to — or both! — is definitely up for debate.

#Good Omens #Ineffable Husbands #Air Conditioning #mymetas #whew #long post! #with too few images imo #with this done I'm gonna steam #about tumblr's absurd limitations #how's a girl supposed to do meta on this website anyway

[she-is-tim]

Bleeding Hearts | Elu Vampire Soulmate AU | Ch.2

AO3 link

Eliott is living on alcohol, weed and blood. That drives his dead body on a daily basis, giving him at least some kind of purpose in his meaningless life. Being immortal sucks. Being dead sucks even more. All he wants is to get out of this endless loop of nothingness, but he doesn’t expect that to happen so soon. When he meets him, his world turns upside down and his heart starts to beat again.

Ch.1

Crossing paths

Blood was dripping down from his lips as he raised his head. An inhuman groan left his throat as the warm liquid filled his insides. His whole body was on fire, he felt himself becoming stronger, invincible even. The metallic flavor on his tongue reminded him of who he was and where he belonged, to the darkness. No one could stop him, because he could kill them all. There will be no more hesitation, no more holding back. The beast inside him cried out, showing his dominance. He slowly opened his eyes that were sparkling blue in the dim light, gazing down at the body in front of him. A beautiful face, small frame, the disheveled brown locks now bathing in deep crimson liquid that was still flowing out of the two holes bitten into his soft neck. Large, ocean blue eyes wide open, showing no signs of life in them. Lucas was dead. The monster killed him. 

Eliott’s eyes snapped open, gasping for air. His whole body was covered in cold sweat, hair sticking to his forehead, tears rolling down his cheeks. He grabbed the shirt he was sleeping in, trying to normalize his breathing and heartbeat. It was such a hard thing to live with a functioning body after spending more than twenty years to get used to being dead. He was just like every other human being, sweating, crying, swallowing, peeing, sleeping, but still different. The sun still burned him, that was sure and he still craved for blood more than anything. Actually things got worse in the last few days. 

He kept following Lucas from afar, making sure the boy won’t notice him. He knew that this was not right, but he just couldn’t hold himself back. It was a strong force inside that made him listen to his newly awakened heart instead of his head. And of course it wouldn’t shut up about Lucas. He needed to know where he lived, where he was working, going to school, to get coffee, who he was visiting at the hospital. Every single detail about his life. At least it was a reason for him to get out of his apartment. Luckily the weather was really cloudy and cold, so he was able to be outside during daytime. He had to admit that with his alive body there came a lot of inconveniences, like feeling cold. Wearing shoes were just as awful as he remembered, but he needed it to protect his feet from the cold. Funny how just for that he wished his dead body back. 

He reached for his phone, that somehow ended up on the floor next to his bed to check the time. It was already past 10, so Lucas was already on the campus, probably being bored to death. Eliott loved to watch him through the university building windows as he was sitting in the classroom, tapping on his cheeks with a pencil, gazing at the professor with those beautiful, ocean blue eyes. Whenever it seemed like the boy noticed him, his heart would beat a thousand miles per hour, just to realize it’s basically impossible. He was a vampire, Lucas was a mortal, therefore he was not able to recognize him until he wanted him to. Of course that was all his heart wished for, but he just couldn’t let it happen. He knew if he would enter the boy’s life in any form, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from being around him all the time, trying to get his attention and make him fall in love. 

He got up from his bed. Since he met his “soulmate” and his heart started beating again he needed much more sleep than before. Now it was 5-6 hours instead of 1 or 2. His abilities were still the same, he was fast, quiet, agile and strong. It was just his brain needed a break and his body needed recharge, which was accomplished by sleeping. 

The kitchen was a bit messy, since he tried to cook something last night, which almost ended with burning down the place. Thankfully he was fast enough to put out the small fire in the pan, but he was sure that the omlette he was making died in the accident. A sad story really. He might do a funeral for it later the day by the trash cans behind the building. Gotta give the honor to those poor eggs that sacrificed themselves to prove him that becoming a vampire didn’t help with his cooking skills. 

He was too sleepy to clean up his own mess, so he just turned on his coffee machine and waited for it to make him some liquid black gold. His hands were still shaking and his heart was racing after the terrible dream he had. Ever since he was following the boy, nightmares like this were haunting him endlessly, reminding him of what could happen if he gets too close to Lucas. What happens if he loses control when he’s around him. That’s why he has to stay away, just observing from the distance, never initiating any sort of contact.  One cup of black coffee later he was agressively staring out the window, well more precisely through a small gap between the thick curtains. The sun was shining bright, no signs of clouds. He hated days like this, because it meant that he had to spend his time inside his apartment, far from Lucas. 

He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. This was not the end of the world, he will go to see him after the sun sets, until then he has a lot of time to spend. The living room was also a mess, crumpled papers, empty beer bottles and an empty box of chinese takeout he ordered after last night’s tragedy. He flopped down on the couch, turning on the TV and just letting it fill the annoying silence. Well, he could hear people walking on the streets, the old lady downstairs talking to her cat, some young couple having sex a few doors away. Who the hell has sex at 11 in the morning? Don’t they have a workplace or school to attend to? Fucking youngsters. 

━━━━

He was halfway through a TV show called The Umbrella Academy when he got startled by his buzzing phone. He reached for it, snatching from the coffee table he was resting his feet on and accepted the call without checking who was calling him. 

“Yes?” he asked, his voice was still a bit raspy, considering he haven’t talked to anyone in days now. 

“Eliott, my favorite barista! How’s it going?” came the enthusiastic voice of Alexandre Delano from the other side of the line. He couldn’t help the small smile creeping up on his face. They knew each other since a while now. Even a vampire needs a job to maintain his regular life somehow, like paying rent, his Netflix subscription, buying weed, alcohol, coffee and other unhealthy things to fuel his body on a daily basis. That’s why he had a part-time job at a night club a couple streets away from his apartment. It was perfect, because they opened after sunset and were closing a few hours before dawn, which meant that he could work without making stupid excuses when it’s a sunny day. Plus the job was fairly easy, he had to make cocktails, serve it and be charming. Basically the perfect place for a vampire. It also helped him with his self control, since it wasn’t easy being around so many people, feeling their pulse pumpig to the rhythm of the loud music, exposed necks and easy preys everywhere. 

“Hey, Alex. Long time.” he said softly, pausing the episode he was currently watching. “What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you could come in and cover a shift for us today. You weren’t here since a week now and Emma fucking misses you.” he said with playfulness in his tone, which made Eliott chuckle. 

“Or she just misses my special margarita cocktail.” he joked, but it was probably true. Emma was his coworker, just like Alex, but she couldn’t quite keep herself away from the drinks. She almost got fired a couple times, but the boys always stood up for her.

“Oh, come on, man! We all miss your stupid face!” he claimed. “What would we do without your sarcastic jokes and grumpy behavior?” 

“That’s just super nice, thank you.” he murmured, rolling his eyes with a fond smile on his face.

“You know how I meant. And it’s fucking friday, students are going crazy! There will be a lots of people. We need all the help we can get.” 

“Chill, Alex. I was in the minute I heard your voice.” he calmed him softly, enjoying the warm feeling that was spreading in his chest.

“Really?! That’s cool. See you at 21h?” he asked happily and Eliott could hear Emma’s voice in the background. They were probably out together somewhere. 

“Sure. See you.” he replied and hung up. 

━━━━

Long hours passed and the club was now filled with mostly tipsy and wilding university students, trying to get rid of all the stress they’ve been gathering throughout the whole week. Eliott was surprised that his beast didn’t even try to burst out, even though he drank half a liter of AB+ before he left his apartment. Maybe it was because of his beating heart, he had no idea, but there was no reason to complain, since that made his job ten times easier. 

He had a lot of fun at the bar with Alex and Emma, making cocktails, serving drinks to sweaty youngsters, enjoying the thumping sounds of dubstep and techno music while watching the crowd of bodies swaying on the dance floor. Of course the brunette couldn’t help herself and got a tiny bit tipsy within two hours. She was a pain in the butt to handle, keep spilling drinks, jabbering at the guests and dancing around the boys clumsily. They had to help her up or clean the mess she made, but they didn’t mind it, because they were having fun. Eliott couldn’t remember the last time he laughed so much, but with all these new feelings inside him, everything was much more intense. Halfway through their shift Alex pointed out how he changed, but in a good way and that he is happy for him, to which Eliott replied with a wide grin. He really was happier and his friend had no idea how much he actually changed. Finally he could feel like he was a normal boy, who wasn’t 48 years old, stuck in a 20 year old body and craving for other people’s blood. He was just Eliott, the bartender. 

Somewhere around midnight he needed to go to the bathroom, just to wash his face and refresh himself. Babysitting Emma all night was a hard task, even for an immortal. As he looked in the mirror, water dripping from his face he felt like he is not seeing a monster, but himself. The young boy that got killed so long ago by a creature of the night made his way back, taking over his body, enjoying his life. He wished for this to be permanent, but a little voice in the back of his head kept reminding him that he can never be normal again, that he and his whole life is completely fucked up. 

He wiped his face with a paper towel and exited the bathroom, walking back towards the bar. He had to stop for a moment when his heart skipped a beat. It was so sudden and unexpected, that he got shocked. It took him not more than a few seconds to notice the cause of it. Lucas was standing by the bar, holding a bottle of beer and chatting with Alex casualy. Eliott panicked. His breathing quickened, heart racing like there’s no tomorrow and his nose got filled with the oh, so familiar scent of mint and deodrant, covering all the different smells that were flying around in the air. He could only see and feel the presence of Lucas, everyone else ceased to exist for him. 

What the fuck is he doing here?!

He could feel his palms getting sweaty, hair sticking to the nape of his neck. His heart was screaming at him, telling him to go over there, talk to Lucas, but this time his brain was sober enough to start coming up with escape routes. He knew he shouldn’t be running away from his workplace, but he couldn’t go there to the brunette and act like he wasn’t just following him for 2 weeks in a row, watching his every step, memorizing his classes and routines. 

No, he can’t go there. No way. He was just about to head towards the back door that was leading to the storage, sneaking out from there, when Emma appeared next to him. He was usually well aware of his own surroundings, being able to tell if someone tried to approach him, but not this time. He was too fucking preoccupied with a certain brown haired, blue eyed boy that was currently laughing at something his stupid friend - Basile, if he remembers his name correctly - said just now. And damn if that laugh wasn’t the best thing he ever heard, Adding to that he was wearing tight, stone washed black jeans with a black button up shirt. Eliott swallowed.

“Hey, Eli! My sweetheart, why are you standing here alone?” she chirped, the smell of vodka mixed with brandy almost, almost covered the sweet scent of Eliott’s beloved boy. Emma threw her arm around the guy’s neck and pulled him towards the bar, keep rambling about some shit. He tried to resist, but it would be too suspicious. He had no choice but to join his friend at the bar. 

“Hey! You’re back!” Alex yelled over the loud music happily. “I was worried that you flushed yourself down in the toilet.” he joked and nudged his side playfully. 

Eliott would laugh at his joke, but all of his hairs were straightening up as he felt the strong presence of Lucas. He was too busy explaining something to his friends at the moment, so he got the chance to just take him in. His beautiful face, his strong jawline, that fucking disheveled hair, his long lashes that were casting spidery shadows on his soft cheeks. Damn, he was so beautiful. 

He got startled out of his thoughts by fingers snapping in front of his nose. He shook his head and looked at Emma, who was standing in front of him with a smug grin on her face. Oh, fuck! 

“Whatcha lookin’ at?” she asked, though it seemed like she already knew the answer. Eliott took a deep breath and shook his head. It was almost impossible to take his eyes off of Lucas, but he somehow managed to do it. 

“Nothing, I’m going back to work.” he said, trying to sound nonchalant, walking to the other side of the bar, as far away from the boys as he just could, but before he had a chance to get away, Alex grabbed his hand, pulling him to his side. He gasped as the realization hit him that all four boys had their eyes fixed on him. Those ocean blue ones were even more beautiful in the blue and pink neon lights of the place. His heart was beating to the rhythm of the music that was currently playing, though he couldn’t tell what it was actually. 

“Don’t try to escape!” Alex said with a wide smirk on his face, pointing forward with the hand that wasn’t gripping into Eliott’s shirt. “These are my sweet friends. They just started college.” he explained enthusiastically. The gang in front of them smiled friendly, they must have heard about the mysterious Eliott Demaury already. Emma likes talking when she’s drunk and he was away for enough time for her to spill some tea to basically anyone that was in her vicinity. 

“Hey, you must be the famous Eliott.” Yann said, her bright smile was in stark contrast with his skin color, which was just extremely charming. Eliott would sure find him handsome, but his eyes were still fixated on one face and it seemed like Lucas also had his full attention on him. Ocean blue eyes boring holes into his face, making his cheeks heat up. What the fuck was this boy doing to him? 

“Yes, he is.” Alex answered, pinching his side while shooting him a disapproving look that was saying ‘Just this one time, be nice to them, okay?’ Eliott wished if he could do that, but as he opened his mouth, nothing came out. 

“Ahw, look at him, being at loss of words.” Emma chimed in, sipping on a glass of god knows what, having a wide smile on her face still. “Excuse him, but he probably never seen such beautiful boys like you. Not Basile, but like the others.” she said smirking, winking at her friends.

“Hey! I’m attractive, okay?” the curly haired boy whined, slamming his beer bottle on the counter, earning a grumpy look from Alex.

“No, I’m fine.” He finally managed to find his voice and talk. He could see something shift through the brunette’s face, but it was gone in a second. “Yes, I’m Eliott. Nice to meet you.” he said and his foolish brain and his fucking polite behavior made him raise his hand. Yann grabbed it first, sending him an encouraging smile. 

“Yann, nice to meet you.” 

“Arthur.” was the next one, hair softly curling up by his ears, his glasses sitting peacefully on his reddened cheeks.

“Basile, we heard a lot about you.” he said with an excited grin, shaking the offered hand a bit too fast and too long. Still Eliott would rather take that than touching the last member of the gang. His heart threatened to just burst out of his chest in excitement and fear. Last time they touched was so fucking intense he got a panic attack, so what would happen if they shake hands? 

He had no chance to get away from it now. Basile’s sweaty palm left his, so he reached towards Lucas, who looked a bit nervous before grabbing it. The feeling of it was like electricity blasting through his nerves and veins, freezing him to the spot where he was standing. It was like something clicked inside him, like a puzzle piece finally found it’s place in the big picture. As he examined the face of the other, he just knew that Lucas was feeling this intensity too. He pulled his hand back like he was touching fire, eyes widening from shock.

“What’s wrong, Lulu?” Alex asked worried, switching his eyes from Eliott to the boy and then back. 

“Nothing.” he mumbled, his voice slightly shaking. He unconsciously licked over his bottom lip, taking it between his teeth while looking at Eliott, searching for answers on his face. He wished if he could give it to him, right after he kissed those soft lips bright red. I am so damn fucked. 

“Wanna go back to dance?” Yann asked softly, placing a hand on his best friend’s shoulder, who finally tore his gaze away from Eliott. He could finally breathe normally again. 

“Yeah, that’s a good idea.” he mumbled on a soft tone, finishing his beer with a few gulps and Eliott couldn’t help, but stare at his Adam’s apple moving up and down on his throat. He had to grab the counter because his fangs just popped out. The control he had over himself for the last few hours was thrown out of the window now. Every single nerve in his body was screaming for Lucas as he walked back to the dance floor with his friends. 

He was dragged out of his daze when Alex a bit too roughly poked his side with his elbow. As he looked at his friend, he could see confusion and a hint of disapprovement in his eyes. The urge to tell him everything and explain that he wasn’t just picking out Lucas for a one night stand was too strong in the moment. So as an answer, he shrugged and walked to the shelves behind them, organizing their collection of whikeys. 

Through the rest of the night, he barely saw Lucas. It was almost like he was avoiding him, since it was always just one of his friends coming to them for drinks. He was both glad and upset at that. Glad, because it was easier to hold himself back, controlling his inside monster that just wanted to burst out from the mere presence of the brunette. Upset, because his whole body was craving for the boy so much it was physically hurting him. He could smell him, hear his heartbeat and see his beautiful features in the crowd. This was a torture for sure. 

The boys left an hour before closing, dragging a very drunk Basile with them. Emma already bailed a couple hours ago, now swaying and making out with a girl on the dance floor to some shitty techno remix. Most of the people already left the place, the rest was shit faced and close to passing out. Eliott decided to clean up the floor and the counter, while Alex went to say hi to his leaving friends. Just the thought of Lucas walking away from him was painful, but as he looked towards them, his eyes locked with a pair of ocean blue ones. His cheeks were a bit red, caused by the mix of alcohol and dancing. There was something in his gaze that sent shivers down Eliott’s spine, making his body tense up. The boy blinked a couple times, licking his bottom lip yet again, basically driving him crazy with this and focused his attention back to his friends. The three of them gave a short hug to Alex, still holding their wasted buddy in a tight grip before walking out of the door. Taking a part of Eliott with him.

━━━━

Closing went much smoother than Eliott expected. He helped to get the remaining people out of the building and clean up the place, but he could leave earlier since Alex offered to close and take Emma home. She was now sleeping on a comfy couch, that was placed in one of the corners, snorring loudly. 

He put on his jacket, shaking hands with his coworker and then stepped outside. The cold breeze of the morning air shook him up a little, helping to get rid of his sleepiness. It was still hard to get used to feeling tired and the need to sleep. His feet was making a crunching sound on the sidewalk as he took a few steps, then he noticed a figure standing a few meters from him, leaning against the wall. He looked over and suddenly he forgot how to breathe. 

Lucas was just standing there, his arms crossed, wearing his signature navy blue bomber jacket over that fancy button up shirt. His hair was falling into his face and his eyes were slightly closed. He actually looked like he was sleeping, even his breathing was slow and even, smelling a bit like beer. 

He wanted to resist so bad, but it was just impossible. They were alone, people were still sleeping or going home from parties, so the street was nice and quiet. The orange light of the street lamps were casting dark shadows over the beautiful face of the boy. As he too a step towards him, his eyes jerked open and his small body got all tensed. He looked at Eliott half shocked, half surprised.

“Hey.” he said, trying to hit a friendly tone in his voice, which seemed to ease the brunette a little.

“Hey.” his voice was almost a whisper and if Eliott wouldn’t have such sharp ears, he could have missed it.

“Alex will be coming a bit later.” he explained, since there was no other reason for him to be here than waiting for his friend. He saw Lucas was fidgeting with his hands, looking down to his feet before raising his gaze at him again. He was so fucking gorgeous.

“I was actually waiting for you.” he muttered under his breath and Eliott’s blue eyes shot wide, not believing his ears.

“Pardon?”

“I said, I was waiting for you.” he repeated now, looking a bit more confisent, his eyes filled with determination. If Eliott wouldn’t be already head over heels for this boy, well, he would be now. 

“And why?” he asked, not being able to hold back the amused grin that creeped up on his face. As a response, he got a shy smile which was the most precious thing he had ever seen. 

“I don’t know... I felt like I should do it.” he said honestly, shrugging like it was not a big deal, while it actually was. Eliott knew too well how that felt, because he kept having those feelings around Lucas way too often. 

“Well, I am here now.” He was praying to whatever force that took over his brain in the moment, making himself be able to speak in full sentences without stuttering. 

“I wanted to apologize.” he started, fingers playing with the zipper of his jacket. “I was a bit rude back then, not introducing myself and pulling away my hand, you know.” he mumbled and he was looking everywhere just to avoid the tall boy’s eyes. Eliott found that extremely endearing. 

“No need for that.” his tone was soft, like warm and fresh honey. “You must have had a rough night. I can walk you home if you want.” he offered, not thinking about the consequences of his own words. Once again, his heart was much louder than his sleep deprived brain. Lucas thought about it for a second and his face split into the most heartwarming smile on the world. 

“Okay, that sounds good.” he said happily, stepping on the sidewalk now.

ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^ˇ^

It’s finally here! I can’t believe I managed to finish this chapter, it might be a bit short, idk but I HAD TO cut it off here, because cliffhanger and because my brain is too tired to come up with more story atm  Enjoy this while you can, I’m going to have a long weekend so I might be able to squeeze out another chapter soon. Make sure to leave feedbacks and don’t hesitate to shoot me with ideas if you want. Bisous

#Skam France #Elu Vampire Soulmate AU #Eliott Demaury #Lucas Lallemant #elu fanfic #Bleeding Hearts #Imane Bakhellal #Le Gang #Idriss Bakhellal #Sofiane Alaoui #Vampire!Eliott #Black haired Eliott #Alexandre Delano

[thelifeoftuan]

Journalism Hell

There’s a little known fact about me. Or a fact that is usually forgotten. Either way. In college, apart from my Biochemistry major and pursuit of a career in medicine, I was also a Journalism major.

We’ll backtrack a little bit. Spring 2010 of my sophomore year of college, following a meeting with my advisor within the College of Arts and Sciences for my Biochemistry degree towards the end of that semester, I sort of spun out of control into this existential crisis. Hahaha! Why, you might ask? Well, it was at that meeting that my advisor was reviewing all of my credits and told me that I was on track to graduate the following Spring. And I was like, “What?” He looked over all of my requirements and said that with some good planning, I am set to graduate the following year. And in my head, I, for some reason, started to panic. Hahaha! I was like, “Um, excuse me dude, I’m only a sophomore. I haven’t even taken the MCAT yet, let alone apply for medical school. I’m not ready to graduate.” I remember asking him what my options were, and he was like, either book it and take the MCAT two months ago and apply to medical school yesterday then saunter on over to the commencement department and get ready to apply for graduation... or, do something else. I went home and stewed. ...like stewed to the point where the stew burned. And I was like, “what the shit! I didn’t plan for this!” Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, why am I complaining, right? The prospect of graduating a year early from college isn’t something to be butt-hurt about. But at that time, I was definitely not ready, mentally or emotionally. Not to mention I was nowhere near ready to really plunge into the horrid process of applying for medical school. That would have required me to get together letters of recommendation, transcripts, take the MCAT (and do somewhat well), apply for our pre-medicine committee interview (a stupid and unnecessary process, honestly, in retrospect), decide where I wanted to try to go to medical school and get those applications together... within a matter of weeks, because if memory serves me right, the application cycles started in the summer. So after I (rather unnecessarily, I will admit) agonized about this, I was like, “nah bro, we’re staying the full four years.” And it was at that time that I then embarked on my existential crisis. What the crap was I gonna do that will effectively prolong my stay in college to the appropriate four years? And it took a couple of days. I didn’t want to squander my time (or money, to be honest) doing something that wasn’t worthwhile. But I also didn’t want to over-tax myself. At first, I was like, well? I’ve always seen myself as a writer, maybe I should delve down that route. I initially thought about picking up an English major or minor. I spent hours and hours pouring over the coursework and projecting my class schedules and how that would pan out or if it would even work. And I discovered that it would if I picked up an English minor. And this department was within the College of Arts and Sciences, and so I wouldn’t have to really branch out too far from “home base.” But then I delved further into the required classes and read up on the syllabi (syllabuses? ...silly buses?) and looked up the instructors on the university online database, and review after review for course after course... they were all mostly bad with, at best, a B- average for grades, and I was like, “...I actually don’t think this is for me.” Being a literature buff was not my thing, and I think the English minor/major at my university trains students for that... which, in my opinion, was not worth my time or energy. I barely knew how to read, let alone critically analyze literature. I definitely was not going to risk something that would take shots at my already teetering GPA if I could help it, especially if it was something additional I was taking on. At that point, I would’ve rather graduated a year early and figure it out from there. So I scrapped that idea. And then it was back to the drawing board. Another several days of searching and seeking counsel... and then one day, a random thought came into my head. There was this nice building at the southern corner of the campus that was one of the newer colleges of our university, the College of Journalism. I would always walk by this building but never ventured in. One nice summer day that Spring semester of 2010, I did. And immediately, I felt sort of the same “at home” vibe I had felt all those years ago when I decided I wanted to become a pediatrician. Another little known fact. I actually started writing (for lack of a better term, honestly) before I even decided medicine was my calling. I remember in kindergarten, I had started writing and I remember my teacher reading some of my stories to my classmates. It wasn’t talent. It was a whim. Some sort of strange whim that has carried me forward throughout the years, just like how my aspiration for a career in medicine did. Within the College of Journalism was a major known as Professional Writing. I went home immediately after that day and did all the research I could on this. There was, unfortunately, no minor offered for any of the journalism majors. But the more I read about the Professional Writing track, the more and more I was sold. This major would train me and give me the skills I needed to become a more proficient writer and actually give me an avenue and motivation to continue writing as a potential career. None of that literary crap that made me despise high school English class, but stories that I would actually enjoy writing. I meticulously planned out my current coursework remaining for my Biochemistry major and overlay the required coursework for a Journalism-Professional Writing major... and it was like over-packing for a trip (another one of my wondrous qualities), borderline impractical and insane, but doable if done correctly. I asked myself, “how invested are you in this, Tuan?” I remember taking an afternoon to think about this, seeking opinions from some of my friends. And then, by the end of the day, I decided to go for it. I scheduled a meeting with an advisor at the college who, honestly and I think appropriately, questioned my sanity. I concretely remember him, one, looking at me with his eyebrows raised when I told him my background and experience (or lack thereof), and two, asking me repeatedly, “Are you sure about this?” But when I expressed my extreme interest and drive, he complied and laid out the requirements for me. I would have to take an entrance competency exam (basically a reading and writing exam). Thank goodness the foreign language requirements were the same among colleges, because I was not about to go down that route again (Spanish 3 is a story for another time...). That summer of 2010 would end up being my busiest summer. Because I picked this new major, I would have to get the required prerequisites out of the way before I could even think about starting any Journalism classes. So this required me to take two journalism classes over the summer. And I had also enrolled in a Biochemistry course that summer. So, three classes during that fateful summer of 2010. Hahaha! Not my smartest decision. But it felt like this new endeavor into the world of Journalism breathed new meaning in my life, and I felt rejuvenated and excited. Well, that feeling did not last too long. Hahaha! Mind you, yes, the entire way until I graduated college, I loved my Journalism major and classes, and it was definitely a reprieve away from my science classes and the stress of applying for medical school. But the very first class I had to take, and I will always remember the course ID to this day, was JMC 2033: Writing for Mass Media (JMC stood for Journalism and Mass Communication and was the ID used for all Journalism classes at my university). This was the introductory “weed-out” class for Journalism majors... which shocked me when my teacher, an impassioned writer and, in my opinion, rather poorly directed masters student who took pride in making this class the hardest it could ever possibly be, said to us on our first day, “If you are taking this class in the summer thinking that it was going to be easier, think again.” In my head, I was like, “oh shit.” No biochemistry professor of mine ever said that in any of my classes on the first day, and here I am, at a place I thought was the greener side of things, and there’s this crazy 20-something-year-old lady with an ego the size of the screen projected at the front of the classroom ready to skewer each and every one of us for the next 8 weeks. ...and skewer us she did. She definitely found some sick joy torturing us students in that class that summer. And I was so out of my element. I knew that I had a disadvantage and that this wasn’t something I had a true strength in. Other people in my class seemed to have read all the time and knew how to pick apart articles, had an eye for ads and design, understood the basic workings of PR and broadcasting. Me? I was the lowly writer who really only had the skills of an unpolished kindergartener. ...but I will be damned if I let my first step into the Journalism world be a misstep. So that summer, even more than my Biochemistry class, I worked my ass off more than ever before. Because it was a summer class, we crammed 16 weeks of work into 8... which was not the healthiest thing, honestly, because that required working and studying every single night, because this lady would present us with quizzes almost every single day of class. And this class was Monday through Thursday. Not to mention you had to make a C average or above in this class to be accepted into the College of Journalism (which, yes, is a given for anything, really), but as you will see from the quiz averages of this particular class, that was kinda touch and go, and I feared for my life and the life of my classmates at several points. And thus arrives the main topic of this post. Hahaha! (That took a while, right?) These quizzes we were subjected to tested absolutely everything (but truthfully, essentially nothing) about the supposed skills a journalist should have. Looking back... honestly, it was mostly hogwash, as you’ll come to see. Hahaha! This class was so bad and so hard that I ended up making daily Facebook status posts about it and then compiling them all together in a singular post titled “Lessons in Journalism Hell” posted on my Blogspot exactly 9 years ago today. I think the funniest (and frankly most appalling) thing this teacher did for this class was each morning, she would post the quiz averages of the day before on the large projector in front of the class, which I always wrote down so that I could relay how horrid this class was, and she also put the highest score and the lowest score on the projector and always, without fail, revealed to the class who made the highest score. ...if she had revealed who made the lowest score, she probably would’ve been murdered, honestly, because no one in the class liked her. And if someone made a perfect score, she would put the student’s name up there for all to see. ...it was kinda insane what this lady did. I look back on this course with such comical contempt, because I was like, “if all of my Journalism classes are going to be like this, I have made a grave mistake.” Thankfully, this was not the case. JMC 2033 is, notoriously, and especially when taught by this one particular crazy lady, is the hardest class in the college. I think what made it hard was it was an introductory course that attempted to teach all Journalism majors the basic concepts of journalism and mass communication, which included advertising, broadcasting, PR, and professional writing, and incorporated the necessities of media literacy and competence. I will say that I learned a few things from this class. But was any of it particularly useful? I mean, a good majority of our assignments and preparation for quizzes was to read or watch or listen to something that was published within a specific time window the day/night before and remember every single goddamn detail we possibly could and hope that we even read, watched, or listened to the right thing so that we could answer quiz questions the following morning. ...perhaps that only useful thing I did pick up from this class was a stronger resilience and work ethic than what I had previously. Haha! And so, without further ado, I would like to repost my Lessons in Journalism Hell on my tumblr today, to commemorate a rather miserable yet pretty laughable time in my life 9 years ago when I decided to pursue a Journalism major the summer before my Junior year of college. Each lesson is numbered and dated with a short sentence or two I devised to describe what the quiz was about, followed by the class average (and often my own personal commentary on such average). I don’t remember my own grades from these quizzes, as I didn’t write them down. It felt like it was poor form. Also, the teacher took back our quizzes after we had five seconds to review them (for some dumbass reason I will never understand), so I don’t have them in any archives of mine. But anyway, I present to you, Lessons in Journalism Hell, June 9 - July 29, 2010. June 9 | Journalism Hell Lesson #1: Copy-editing marks. A journalist MUST learn how to copy-edit using the CORRECT symbols and marks. Class avg: 57.7/100 ...HOLY CRAP! June 10 | Journalism Hell Lesson #2: Making distinctions. A journalist MUST learn how and when to use who vs. whom. Class avg: 79.6/100 June 14 | Journalism Hell Lesson #3: AP Style. A journalist MUST learn how to use AP (Associated Press) style of writing. Class avg: 63/100... and teacher said she expected great things from this quiz -.- June 15 | Journalism Hell Lesson #4: Newspapers. A journalist MUST learn how to read a newspaper--and figure out what content the teacher will quiz over. Class avg: horrendously low... T_T June 16 | Journalism Hell Lesson #5: Language Lapses. A journalist MUST learn that you feel bad NOT badly, that mobs are always angry and beatings are usually brutal, and finally, that you are usually nauseated, NOT nauseous...unless you make OTHER people want to vomit. Class avg: 97.3/100 :] June 17 | Journalism Hell Lesson #6: Newspapers Round 2. A journalist MUST learn how to read the newspaper (again), analyze it, memorize important facts, and rely on sheer gut about what the heck the teacher will ask on the quiz. Class avg: 68.2/100 ...my Buddha. -.- June 21 | Journalism Hell Lesson #7: Diversity. A journalist MUST know the difference between an oreo and a twinkie. Enough said. Class avg: 75.7/100 June 22 | Journalism Hell Lesson #8: Diversity Part 2. A journalist MUST learn how to read online news sources about blacks, Native Americans, and gays. Class avg: 43.7/100 ...OH MY SNAPS! We're getting killed by these quizzes! June 23 | Journalism Hell Lesson #9: It's anyone's guess. A journalist MUST know that if he/she WERE smarter, he/she would have made a better grade on this quiz. Class avg: 77/100 June 24 | Journalism Hell Lesson #10: Huffingtonpost.com. A journalist MUST... oh, what the hell. This quiz was completely insane and taught me nothing besides how terribly vague and untimely the quiz content was. All I learned was that huffingtonpost.com updates multiple times and the time frame we journalism students were given was within a 10-hour time span. Class avg: 58.8/100 -- I'm starting to get worried... June 29 | Journalism Hell Lesson #11: AP style round 2. A journalist MUST continue to learn how to use AP (Associated Press) style of writing. Class avg: 70/100 June 30 | Journalism Hell Lesson #12: The Week (online magazine). A journalist MUST not give up. As we are all getting tired of this, refer back to lessons 4, 6, and 10. Class avg: 71.9/100 July 1 | Journalism Hell Lesson #JUST KIDDING: There was no quiz today. WHOOPEE! July 6 | Journalism Hell Lesson #13: Us Weekly. A journalist MUST not let his/her brain melt while reading this tabloid-esque trash. Class avg: 78.1/100 July 7 | Journalism Hell Lesson #14: AP style round 3. A journalist MUST continue to learn how to use AP style of writing. Class avg: 93.2/100 ...WOOHOO! July 8 | Journalism Hell Lesson #15: Pluralizing. It's bitches and hoes! Class avg: 85.9/100 July 12 | Journalism Hell Lesson #16: AP style round 4. Class avg: 85.9/100 July 13 | Journalism Hell Lesson #17: AP style round 5. Class avg. 82.1/100 July 15 | Journalism Hell Lesson #18: NPR. A journalist MUST listen to 20 stories of Morning Edition on NPR (National Public Radio) and remember all the details. Class avg. 76.4/100 July 19 | Journalism Hell Lesson #19: NBC Nightly News @ 5:30 p.m. A journalist MUST watch the 5:30 p.m. programming of NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams. Class avg. 89.3/100 July 20 | Journalism Hell Lesson #20: AP style round 6. Class avg. 85.7/100 July 21 | Journalism Hell Lesson #21: Advertising Age (AdAge.com). A journalist MUST be familiar with AdAge.com. Class avg. 70.9/100 ...and we were doing so well. -.- July 22 | Journalism Hell Lesson #22: PR Newswire (prnewswire.com). A journalist MUST be familiar with a PR tool website. Class avg. 72.9/100 July 26 | Journalism Hell Lesson #23: ESPN.com. A journalist MUST ...seriously?! This is by far the stupidest thing I've studied. Class avg. 75.4/100 July 27 | Journalism Hell Lesson #24: The First Amendment. A journalist MUST memorize the First Amendment... word for word. Class avg. 81.5/100. Awesomeness! July 28 | Journalism Hell Lesson #25: TMZ.com. A journalist MUST read more trash. Ugh. Class avg. 68.6/100. ...GEEZ! July 29 | Journalism Hell Lesson #26: Gawker.com. And so, the last lesson in Journalism Hell before the shit hits the fan. A journalist MUST read even MORE trash. -.- Class avg. 71.2/100 Hahaha! There you have it. Needless to say, I got through this class with an A (thank Buddha. I honestly would have been a little upset if the decision to pick up a second major in college brought down my GPA and further hurt my chances of getting into medical school). My teacher called out my name a number of times because I had made the highest grade on a quiz, and I think my name showed up on the board twice because I had made a perfect score on two quizzes. Each time, I just sunk into my seat and avoided eye contact. I definitely did not take these instances as accolades, because it made me feel really bad because the class averages were so low, and my classmates honestly were not having it with this lady, so I definitely did not appreciate her putting me on the spot. But regardless, I persevered and left JMC 2033 in the rear-view mirror as I started my actual Professional Writing classes the following fall semester. It gave me a giggle to go through this post again. Some comical memories of a pretty grueling summer, for sure, but productive and successful nonetheless. In the end, I definitely enjoyed my classes at the Journalism college, and it was definitely a decision that I did not regret. Anyway, just thought I’d trek through memory lane for a bit on this late night. Till next time. :]

#life of tuan #journalism #professional writing #lessons in journalism hell

[murasaki-murasame]

I guess I’m fully committed to writing about :Re s2 now, since I have a lot of thoughts about episode 15, lol. Mostly good ones, though.

Thoughts under the cut [and spoilers for the entirety of :re].

In general, this episode adapted slightly more than I expected it to, but only a little bit. I’m slightly sad that it looks like the whole Cochlea/Rushima arc will be wrapped up by the end of the next episode, but with this sort of pacing it makes sense, and I have a lot of faith that they’ll handle it well. There’s also some ways I can see it getting trimmed down to fit well enough into one episode, but I’ll get into that later.

Firstly, I’m really happy they added in that scene of Hide heading onto the CCG’s boat. I’m pretty sure we didn’t get anything like that in the manga, and we kinda just had to guess at what he was up to during all this. I always disliked how coy Ishida tried to be about what Hide was up to in this arc, so I appreciate that it looks like the anime’s being more transparent about it. Hopefully this little addition is hinting at the idea that they’ll explicitly make it clear that Scarecrow is Hide in the next episode. That’s something that really should have been made clear immediately in the manga, since the upcoming scene with Marude and Yoshitoki literally spells out that Hide’s still alive, but Ishida kept being coy and evasive about it until like 40+ chapters after this point. Yes, I’m still bitter about that, lol.

On the note of Hide, I wonder if they’re going to include the flashback scene that shows him, as Scarecrow, breaking Amon out of the Aogiri base on Rushima. On the one hand, it’s pretty important at explaining that detail of what Amon’s been up to, but on the other hand, it pretty much never comes up again a single time, not even once Amon and Hide are back in the story and literally working together and talking to each other, so I’m not entirely sure if it’s even worth including. I’d prefer them to keep it and just take some additional steps to actually explain what the heck was going on with all that, and how Hide knew about the Rushima base in the first place. But I guess we’ll see.

And while I’m at it, I think I forgot to mention in my post about episode 14 that, since the chorus scene of the OP shows Kaneki in the environment he was in when he talked to his hallucination of Hide, I’m still pretty sure that the part right after that is meant to be him and Hide reaching their hands out to each other.

Anyway, back onto the episode itself, I feel a bit vindicated about how they did indeed go back to adapt at least most of the Rushima stuff from the end of volume 6 that they’d previously skipped past. So we actually got to see how Mutsuki ended up captured by Torso, and whatnot. I have a few minor issues with how they handled it, like how they didn’t explain that Mutsuki had transferred over to the Hachikawa squad, and that they cut the part where he talks to Hogi and thinks about Kaneki for a bit, but it’s all pretty minor.

It also would have been nice if they at least named the new Qs members, but that probably would have just felt annoying to anime-only people especially, to have lots of names suddenly popping up on the screen. It still gets across just fine that they’re just new members of the squad, at least.

It’s been a while since I read this arc, so I might be forgetting stuff, but aside from that, I think the only real thing they cut was the exposition about Miza’s clan, but I’m honestly happy they cut that. It felt really randomly thrown in when it happened in the manga, it never comes up again, and I’m still kinda reeling about the casual reveal of there being a clan of underground ghoul dwarf people.

I’m actually slightly surprised at how faithfully they adapted everything else. I wouldn’t have been surprised if they had trimmed down or removed some of the fight scenes in this episode, but I’m glad they didn’t. I mean, some minor things did get shortened, like how they basically removed the whole sequence of the Suzuya squad laughing at Kurona when she thinks that Suzuya was dead, but that’s incredibly minor, so I’m not complaining.

I should probably wait to see how the next episode goes to see for sure, but it looks like the anime might be outright removing the whole plot point of Koma and Irimi coming back into the story because apparently they didn’t die at the end of the first series I guess. I’d be really, really happy if they remove that, since it was always a really frustrating part of the manga that was a big part of why so many people have always complained at how :re ‘just keeps bringing characters back from the dead’. They were some of the worst cases of that, since they literally did NOTHING after coming back into the story, and were basically just there to force the image of the Anteiku crew getting back together.

I was holding out some hope that they’d add some anime-original stuff related to Shirazu, along the lines of us seeing him as a Kanou-made zombie quinque thing so that the Qs can fight him and get some resolution to that whole plot point, but oh well. It’s at least perfectly faithful to the manga that nothing like that happens, lol.

The Tatara fight scene looked pretty neat in action. I’m still slightly baffled by the entire concept of a flame-spewing kakuja, but it at least looks cool. It’s a bit surprising that the anime decided to have the flames be blue, but it actually works pretty well with the show’s overall colour palette. 

I have a feeling some anime-only people are going to think that the history between Tatara and Houji that gets referenced in this episode is something that the manga went into more detail about, and that the anime cut, but not really. At most the anime just didn’t mention the name of the ghoul gang that Tatara’s brother ran, but that’s pretty much it. I remember this being one of the first parts I witnessed where people reading the manga were really disappointed by how it played out, since even in the manga it felt like such a weak, short-lived resolution to a whole background plot that never gets explored. I just wanna make that one clear for everyone, haha.

Back on the topic of stuff I wish the anime could do differently, it’d be great if they just outright kill Kanou off in this arc, since he serves basically zero purpose in the entire rest of the story, but at this point I’m not expecting them to. Oh well.

As I said before, it looks like the next episode is more or less going to adapt up to the end of the whole Cochlea/Rushima arc, so I’m curious to see how that pans out, since it still feels like there’s a fair bit left to adapt. But since this episode included stuff like a good amount of the action at Kanou’s lab, there’s actually a bit less to cover than I initially expected.

To start with, I’m expecting some changes overall to how the stuff with Mutsuki and Torso is handled. Which I think should be good. Especially in hindsight, the way Ishida handled this whole plot point was a really ill omen for what was to come later in the story, so it’d be great if they change it. Specifically, I think the manga went too far in making Torso look sympathetic, and in making Mutsuki look evil. They spent way too long on Torso’s tragic backstory, and they put way too much emphasis on the whole reveal of Mutsuki having severe issues with violence and psychosis. I have a feeling that the anime will handle that pretty differently, though. For one thing I don’t think they’ll have time to even go over Torso’s backstory to the same extent the manga did, and even thus far the anime has consistently made Torso more outright menacing and villainous than he was in the manga, and they’ve treated Mutsuki with a lot more respect than the manga did, at least by this point. Even in this episode alone, Torso was way more creepy and evil than he was in the manga, so I think that bodes well for the next episode.

It’s also interesting to me that they removed the scene where Urie stumbles upon Torso’s dismembered corpse in the cave while we as the readers were still left hanging about what happened between him and Mutsuki. It implies that they might be treating the whole thing with a lot less shock value than the manga did, which would be fantastic. Especially if it tones down the emphasis on Mutsuki being ‘secretly evil and murderous’ or whatever as much as possible. And on a similar note, if the anime still has him joining the Qs in fighting Takizawa, I hope they remove that random bit of genital mutilation because hoo boy that sure was the nail in the coffin in making clear exactly how Ishida was going to handle Mutsuki as a character from then on.

I have a feeling that they’re going to portray Mutsuki as being a lot more sympathetic, even when they flash back to how he killed his family. Which would be nice. For one thing, I’m pretty sure that the manga kept it a secret that in the auction raid arc he ate some dead investigators to heal his wounds, and I think they tried to bring it up here as part of the whole ‘reveal’ of Mutsuki being psychotic, but the anime’s already made it way more clear, in more of a casual and matter of fact way, that that’s what happened, so at the very least they won’t use that as part of some obnoxious ‘he was like this all along!!!’ twist.

It’ll also be interesting to see if they include the flashback to him telling the CCG about his desire to live as a man, since they didn’t cover it way back at the start of s1. I have complicated feelings about that scene, and how it was handled in the manga, so I dunno how I want the anime to handle it. I guess to get straight to the point, I don’t want it to be framed as ‘he’s a cis girl who wants to present as male to avoid sexual violence’, but at the very least, if the anime handles his character way better overall, I’d at least prefer that to how the manga tried to spin it. But I’d prefer it if they just stick to him truly identifying as a man, since, y’know, he does. [As a reminder, the official translation of the series still, as of the most recent volume of :re (volume 6) explicitly says that he ‘was assigned female at birth but decided to transition after joining the Qs’]

As I also said before, I hope they flesh out the scene with Marude and Yoshitoki to be a lot more upfront and transparent about Hide’s involvement in it, but thankfully it looks like that’s what’s gonna happen. Even with just with how this episode added in that short scene of Hide getting onto the boat, that on it’s own would make it much more clear what’s going on. But I do want them to be way more clear that, when Marude talks about having gotten information from Hide, he really does mean that he very recently got information from a very-much-still-alive Hide.

And on that note, if they at least keep that whole detail of him having given Marude the info about how the RC Gates work which lead him to figuring out the truth about the Washuus being ghouls, it’d just make it even more obvious that Hide has a serious connection to Aogiri, or at least with Eto specifically. Especially since the anime kept the scene where Eto talks about the whole RC Gate thing with Kaneki, and how that ties into the Washuus being ghouls. So it’d be even more obvious in the anime that it’s just suspiciously coincidental that both of them would know that big of highly confidential information and use it for similar goals of trying to take down V. And of course there’s also the fact that they might include the flashback to Hide rescuing Amon from Rushima, which would really just beg the question of what the heck’s going on with him. [Hint hint: the manga literally never bothers explaining any of it, but hopefully the anime will :)]

It’ll be interesting to see how they handle the final Cochlea scenes, especially since the preview stuff doesn’t show a whole lot of it, and doesn’t show anything to do with Kaneki. I still assume that they’re going to include the entire rest of the arc, since there’s only like three or four chapters of material left to adapt in terms of it. I think it’ll probably be handled faithfully enough, though the stuff with Touka and co fighting some of the other CCG people as they escape Cochlea might get shortened a lot, or basically done off-screen. I guess we’ll see.

Other than that, I’m still really, really curious to see how the heck they go about adapting the final arcs of the series. To put it into perspective, if they wrap up this whole arc in the next episode, then after that they’ll have eight episodes to adapt seven volumes of material [and the final volume is really long so it averages out to being very nearly one volume per episode anyway]. And honestly I just have no clue how they’re gonna work with it, and it feels kinda pointless to try guessing at this point.

I still do think that a lot of the stuff from the next major story arc can be outright removed, though, or at least heavily shortened. And I’d be thankful for it, since this is when the manga got really aimless and bloated. It’s in dire need of some strict editing.

At the very least, I think they could remove nearly everything to do with where Mutsuki’s character goes after this, which could save on a lot of time, even during the final arc of the story, since that involved an obnoxious amount of time being spent on having it get very clumsily resolved at the last minute.

But other than that it’s just kinda hard to say, and I think I’ll just wait until we actually get into the next part of the story before talking about it much.

I think they’ll probably spent five episodes on the Goat arc, and three on the Dragon arc, but we’ll see.

Also, I’ve been thinking about how the anime removed the references to Kaneki’s new reputation as the CCG’s Black Reaper, and I really think I like how they handled it. It was the sort of thing that felt disappointingly short-lived and unexplored in the manga, given that after the timeskip, Kaneki almost immediately abandons the CCG anyway, so we get all of like one scene of him actually doing stuff as the Black Reaper. I can’t blame anyone for being disappointed by how it got glossed over in the anime, but I think it works pretty well.

All in all, I’m still enjoying this way more than I ever expected to, and I genuinely do think it’s fixing a lot of the issues I had with the manga. It still hinges a lot on if they can stick the landing and handle the rest of the season well, though.

#murasaki rambles #tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul :re #this got surprisingly long lol

[unexpectedreylo]

What’s With Star Wars Fandom Anyway?

Last week I posted this piece on the condescending attitudes of BNFs, bloggers, and professional fanboys toward Reylos and fans of romance in general.  

This got me thinking on the long-time sense of discomfort I have had with other Star Wars fans for many, many years.  Long before the prequels or Reylo or bizarre petitions against movies.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’ve also met a lot of terrific people, some of which have been friends for decades.  But the level of discourse, especially on social media, has reached a nadir.  It’s honestly the worst I’ve ever seen.

Some of it reflects where society is as a whole.  Social media was meant to connect people but it’s created tribes and turned friends and families into mortal enemies.  Total strangers feel comfortable being cruel to other strangers.  People seek validation and dopamine hits from “likes.”  Even I’m guilty of this!  

Some of it reflects what’s terrible about nerd/geek culture.  On the one hand, my entry into the world of fan fiction and zines in the ‘90s was a welcome change from the are-you-cool-enough world of indie/alternative that I was in beforehand.  On the other hand there was an element of “yes but are you as much of a fan as I am” that is too prevalent today.  As anyone who has read “Misery” knows, fan passion can easily be warped into something destructive, especially when things don’t go the way the fan wants.  I used to call fellow fans like that Annie Wilkeses and joke about hoping George Lucas’s car never crashes in front of their houses. (I guess I should say that now about Rian Johnson, Kathleen Kennedy, and J.J. Abrams.)  Nerds generally make perfect the enemy of very good, pretty good, or just good.  If it’s not a face melting experience it’s the worst thing ever.

Some of it though is because of what Star Wars has been specifically.  Star Wars has always had tremendous mainstream success, which means it’s always been open to all kinds of people, on a global level. Yet there’s always been a subset of moviegoers, people like you or me, who are very passionate about it.  This gives Star Wars an easy entry to a particular cult within a larger more casual fan base.  This cult has all of the problems of other cultish things along with a large variety of people with a large variety of views, beliefs, lifestyles, etc. who are involved in it.  

The other thing I’ve come to realize is that many Star Wars fans look to the saga as comfort food they want served their way, not as art.  The only logical conclusion I can come to after 41 years of loving Star Wars and 26 years of observing fandom is that what many fans want is safe, easy, predictable, and familiar, not what’s challenging.  There’s a reason why the second chapter in every trilogy so far ends up with the lowest box office of the three.  It’s always the chapter that says, “You think you know Star Wars?  You think you know what’s going to happen next?  Guess what?  You don’t.”  Nothing symbolized this better than the camera panning upward instead of down to an inverted Naboo royal starship at the beginning of AOTC, a ship that then descends into fog on Coruscant.  Even the hallowed TESB left people perplexed with its unexpected twists and its cliffhanger ending.  Today it’s regarded differently precisely because it took chances, yet so did AOTC and TLJ.  I’ll get to why TESB today doesn’t get the same backlash dumped on the latter two films in a minute.

I believe there is a reason why TFA is the way it is and why it seemed that Lucas’s ideas for the ST didn’t seem to manifest much until TLJ.  Abrams and company KNEW there was a backlash against TPM was because it didn’t feel familiar enough to Gen-X fans.  No, it’s not because of kid Anakin or even Jar Jar.  They were excuses, lightning rods for reasons people can’t or don’t want to articulate.  TFA had a huge advantage in that it had the OT3 back while TPM had an entirely new cast, Yoda and droids aside.  It carefully made sure its setting looked enough like the OT to be comforting to those fans of the old school.  Some of the new characters were easy to place in missing slots:  Rey was like young Luke, Kylo Ren was like Darth Vader, Snoke was like the Emperor, Man Kanata like Yoda, etc..  A lot of it was lighthearted and funny.  And it worked.  Not everyone was thrilled with it.  I had criticisms of  the film at the time.  Eventually a slow burn backlash developed, mostly accusing TFA of being unoriginal and making Rey a Mary Sue, but it wasn’t anything on the scale of hysterics that I saw with the prequels and with TLJ.

Why do many Star Wars fans demand “comfort food?”  It has to do with the first film and the way it presents a galaxy in black and white, where good and evil are identifiable and its sense of deep familiarity in spite of its setting due to its expert use of archetypes and tropes.  I’m not criticizing this at all.  It is at the heart of ANH’s brilliance and charm.  It was released at time when America really needed to believe in itself again after the chaotic ‘60s and early ‘70s.  To a generation of latch key kids and broken homes, it also provided comfort, clarity, certainty, and adults to look up to.  Don’t believe me?  Why the freakout then over Luke’s portrayal in TLJ?  A lot of people my age, myself included, put them up on a pedestal.  Naturally a film that provides those things will attract people who seek them out.  The Star Wars saga has moved away from those stark differences in the other films but there’s still a clear morality.  

As I had previously noted, TESB initially made some people scratch their heads.  But it became the cool kid at the table years later.  Why is that?  Sure some of it was Gen-Xers who had become accustomed to darker entertainment, antiheroes, irony, and cynicism having retro respect for a blockbuster movie that didn't have a happy ending.  But I think it’s also because of familiarity.  When you watch a movie 75 times it’s not quite so shocking anymore.  Instead it becomes that album where you know every song by heart, even every bridge and chord change.  It’s part of your DNA.  I think this may be a reason, though not the sole reason, why it seems the prequels are gaining more respect.  After 13-19 years, they’ve become familiar too.  And to many fans, familiar is better than scary and unknown, which is what watching any new Star Wars movie for the first time is like.  

This is why TLJ really threw them for a loop.  They thought TFA made it clear what was going to happen next:  Kylo was going to be even badder, Rey was going to train and find out she’s either a Skywalker or a Kenobi so that justifies her existence, Snoke was going to be revealed as someone really important, Rey was going to hook up with Finn or maybe we’ll get something even more “progressive” with a gay romance, and Luke was going to return as his lovable old self.  And none of that happened.  Instead of just saying, “Okay, I guess I was off then,” they revolt online as though Lucasfilm is going to listen to a social media mob.  They also attack other fans who aren’t on the hate bandwagon along with them.

The problem is there’s little anyone can do about it.  The good news is they make up a small portion of the Star Wars moviegoing public and Lucasfilm knows as much as they complain, they will still show up for their fix.

#reylo tlj star wars fandom

[deltaengineering]

Bummer Anime 2018 Part 2: shoujo to the rescue

It got better, mostly because it could hardly get worse. That doesn’t mean it was a smooth ride, of course. I would like to state, for the record, that I’m not trying to be the funny guy who hates everything here; the season’s just that unusually bad. As before, the source for the ad copy at the end of each block is this.

Asobi Asobase

What: A bunch of assholes play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

✅ It’s another exuberant comedy, and unlike Chio-chan, I can’t catch this one on the execution: It has the technical chops and honestly good comedic timing.

❌❌ Initially wants to make you believe it’s a pleasant cute girls doing cute things show, but what it actually is is a brutally annoying and ugly explosion in the reactionface factory. Since the production values are there, it’s rather too good at that.

❌❌ I was trying to compare it to something, and the best I could come up with was rage comics. Yeah, it’s anime rage comics. It’s that bad.

❌❌ I would feel more benevolent towards it if it were shorter, but at full length its high energy screaming based assault is mostly just tiresome.

♎ This is one of those rare shows where even I will say your mileage may vary. It’s really good at what it does, but I hate everything it does. Hooray for the subversion, but at the end of the day you’re still annoying and ugly.

ANN sez: “It's this exact mix of stupid crassness and innocent naiveté that I think truly defines high-school life, and Asobi Asobase nails it perfectly. “

Hyakuren no Haou to Seiyaku no Valkyria

What: A smartphone with a light novel protagonist attached time travels to the bronze age, establishes a incest-fascist harem regime with the power of Wikipedia.

❌❌ read the synopsis again please

❌❌ there’s more idiocy than that, believe it or not (ex.: smartphone hotline to his actual imouto, for the feels), but I haven’t got all day.

❌❌ Basing your isekai shit on “history” (i.e., a LN author’s idiotic idea of history) instead of an MMO or whatever only serves to piss me off even more.

❌❌ Actually not better than Isekai Smartphone, which makes it one of the worst anime episodes I have ever seen. Congratulations. The only thing it has over Death March is that it doesn’t spend 80% of the time in menus, but it makes menus look pretty good so it’s a wash.

ANN brainfarts: “Yuuto also seems to be limiting his phone searches to historically accurate things as well, which shows that he's really thinking about the fact that he's in the past – no one's inventing the rocket here, they're just learning to grind grain and use the phalanx formation for battles.”

Phantom in the Twilight

What: Chinese girl travels to London, inadvertently inherits her great-grandma’s vampire harem. 

✅ Step 1 of every otome harem appraisal is determining how much of a wet blanket the protagonist is; Ton here is pretty spunky and even gets to kick some ass, so well done on that.

✅ Some of the right kind of nonsense for my taste, stuff like chav goblins and Jiangshi with miniguns is always appreciated.

✅ Random shows ending up with bizarre minimal techno soundtracks is still something that I approve of.

❌ Still not the glorious kind of nonsense that Dance With Devils had, nor the disregard of actual romance in favor of comedy that Dame x Prince exhibited. It’s an otome-ass otome harem and that’s not inspiring confidence for the long term.

❌ Looks cheap, and that won’t be getting any better.

ANN sez: “The fantasy worldbuilding here also felt far more sturdy than in many similar shows; this isn't a world where the Good Fantasy Guys fight the Bad Fantasy Guys, this is a world where creatures like goblins and spriggans and werewolves all exist, all possess their own cultures and priorities, and uneasily rub shoulders with each other.”

Jashin-chan Dropkick

What: Demon snake girl wants to murder the chuuni gothloli that summoned her, gets owned right back.

❌❌ It’s the second coming of Dokuro-chan, with every punchline being torture. Quite literally for the characters, and consequently for the audience as well.

❌❌ Needless to say, the entire cast (there’s some additional supernatural babes, none of which make much of an impression) are jerks and the show being wantonly mean-spirited towards them does not cancel that out. 

❌ Somehow the second anime about eating reptile ass in recent memory. But Maidragon, as lame as it was, wasn’t as terrible as this. Jashin-chan won’t get into insipid family feels any time soon, but the alternative is worse.

ANN sez: “If this is your taste in humor, it may be worth giving a second episode to see if it starts pulling that off.”

Kyoto Teramachi Sanjou no Holmes

What: Handsome genius antique dealer appraises old pottery and his assistant’s soul.

✅ I have to admit that if you somehow decided to make a otome version of Sherlock without anything so crass as murder, this is how you’d do it. It works.

✅ The leading pair has simple but effective chemistry.

✅ The studio behind it has mostly done porn OVAs before, which is the kind of meta-humor I can get behind.

❌ Based on a series of novels, so naturally the talkytalk gets out of hand.

❌ Doesn’t have the highest budget, tries to make up for it with rainbow-colored garishness. Not a dealbreaker but it could get tiresome.

ANN sez: “While Yagashira cuts a handsome figure as the bishonen, Aoi has more of an ordinary appearance – perhaps deliberately so, since I suspect that the source novels were originally aimed at female audiences.”

Shinya! Tensai Bakabon

What: Showa-era gag manga gets on air again after decades, repeatedly points out how hilarious that is.

❌ Beat-for-beat the same first episode concept as Osomatsu-san.

❌ The main difference is that Bakabon is more willing to look old as fuck, but when they arrive at the non-ruse look at the end of the episode, it’s the same as the non-ruse look that Osomatsu-san ended up at the end of its own first episode.

❌  So guess what, constantly takes potshots at Osomatsu-san, despite being a blatant ripoff of it.

❌❌ When it doesn’t reference Things You Know (if you’re a middle-aged Japanese salaryman), it references its own sorry showa-era gag manga self.

❌❌ I didn’t even like Osomatsu-san but this is an embarrassment.

♎ On the bright side, not as likely to provide fujos with incest shipping material. I fully expect to be proven painfully wrong on this.

ANN sez: Nothing. Way too Japanese for them, I suppose. 

Angolmois - Genkou Kassenki

What: Historical action show wherein a bunch of misfits in medieval Japan fight the Mongols.

✅ Fairly decent action and animation thereof.

✅ Characters seem alright for this sort of thing. Maybe a bit too tryhard violent for my tastes, but that’s still within acceptable parameters.

❌❌ The looks are ruined in postproduction. I could live with the heavyhanded color correction, but what really kills it is the same omnipresent static paper texture over every single shot. It’s bad when it doesn’t change between shots but it’s devastating when it doesn’t move along with zooms and pans, which this show has a lot of.

❌❌ Seriously, I haven’t seen anything as senselessly destroyed by a single AfterEffects layer since Garo: Vanishing Line’s Parkinsonscam, but at least that only affected impact frames. Here it’s literally every frame. Delete that PNG you damn fools.

❌ So yeah, it’s okay-ish but that’s not enough to survive one boneheaded executive decision that’s impossible to ignore. It just comes out as a net negative.

ANN sez: “From its beautifully animated, choreographed, and directed fight scenes to its generally dynamic compositions and keen understanding of visual economy, Angolmois is a visually stunning production.”

Lord of Vermilion - Guren no Ou

What: Tokyo gets enveloped in red mist which raptures most of the population and turns the rest into JRPG characters. They start fighting, we promise.

❌ Has the shape of an obvious Persona clone, but isn’t one; it’s actually based on an arcade CCG. So the source material isn’t very classy to begin with.

❌❌ Haphazardly thrown together so it’s hard to care about anything, especially not the characters.

❌❌ Opens with a flashforward to the climax, so we know this will just end up as overdesigned dudes and dudettes having allegedly epic battles that the show can’t afford to make look good, but can afford to make very red. Thanks for the heads up, I guess.

❌ So it’s quite bad, and not even funny-bad like Caligula was.

ANN sez: “There are always a few action shows like this every season, and they're always entirely overshadowed by that season's versions of shows like My Hero Academia and Banana Fish”

Grand Blue

What: City slicker moves to a beach town expecting to end up in Amanchu; ends up in Animal House instead.

❌❌ Say it with me: Every punchline is the protagonist making a shocked face at dumb meatheads doing something stupid.

♎ For something that I feel like I should hate every second of, I actually didn’t hate it all that much. I even thought it was mostly sort of enjoyable. I don’t really know what exactly does it but I can offer some ideas:

✅ While the punchlines (well, punchline) may be bad, the jokes themselves aren’t. This is a real sitcom with larger-scale comedic setups than you usually see in anime, jokes build upon each other and keep escalating.

✅ Sleazy fratboy humor about partying hard and drinking like an idiot isn’t very profound, but rare at least in anime. And it’s amusing that the overall conceit is that it’s preventing iyashikei from taking place. Novelty counts for something. 

✅ Manages to build awkward comedic situations about buff dudes with their dicks out without resorting to the same old gay panic jokes. Just regular panic, no homo.

✅ Makes a good Friday beach bum combo with Harukana Receive, which incidentally also got better by embracing its more prurient side.

ANN sez: “If Grand Blue Dreaming has a major Achilles heel, its that it isn't self-aware enough to recognize when a joke has run its course. ”

Happy Sugar Life

What: Yandere sociopath adopts a preteen girl (from a parking lot). It’s cute, only not.

✅ Is fully aware that everyone in this show is an asshole and is honestly trying for subversive. At least on the surface.

✅ Goes all on on the imagery, which works. At least on the surface.

❌❌ Simply exploiting the contrast between cuteness and insanity got old about a decade ago; this cranks up the presentation on both sides but doesn’t really add anything new.

❌❌ About as mean-spirited and unpleasant as Mahou Shoujo Site, while having even less to say. 

❌ Doesn’t seem like it’s going anywhere; it’s just going to be the main character pwning other people that are just as flamboyantly fucked up as she is, but not as good at it. Starting with a flashforward to the (very edgy, of course) ending like Lord of Vermilion doesn’t help either. And even if they end up rusemanning what is implied there it won’t be much better.

ANN sez: “Happy Sugar Life was on my list of most-anticipated anime this season because its combination of disparate elements seemed so utterly perverse that I was curious to see how they could possibly fit together.“

Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight

What: Girls slowwalk in an academy for stage arts by day, get into metaphorical superbattles by night.

✅✅ What can I say, it’s Love Live x Marimite with a glossy coating of Ikuhara-style operatics. A total deltabait concept if I’ve ever seen one.

✅ Clones the storytelling approach of Ikuhara but not many of his specific directing mannerisms; Since I’m tired of the latter but a sucker for the former, this is a good thing.

✅ In a similar vein, this trades Ikuhara’s functional ciphers for actual characters and his enigmatic arthouse plots for something that obviously makes sense. 

✅ How gay? So gay.

❌ Has the opposite problem of Grand Blue: This is a show that should blow me away, but doesn’t. In fact, if it didn’t bring the big damn musical theater complete with one of the best and most appropriate henshins I’ve ever seen near the end, I’d say it was fairly lame.

❌ Probably has something to do with that in the course of casualizing Ikuhara, the “real” world ended up too bland and the characters too generic. I get that it’s for contrast, but it can be done far better (see Yorimoi for an example).

✅ In any case, it still seems easily worth watching even if it’s not as good as it could be. Maybe it’ll even get better.

ANN sez: “All I can say for certain is that it comes completely out of nowhere, and that it raises all kinds of questions about what kind of series this is going to be.“

Yuragi-sou no Yuuna-san

What: Impoverished ghost hunter checks into a haunted hot spring and interacts with the harem that happens to live there.

❌ As generic a 90s ecchi harem comedy as they come; my correspondents tell me that this is extremely reminiscent of Love Hina. Shockingly it’s actually based on a 2016 manga, but you wouldn’t be able to tell.

❌ As such, an abundance of accidental boobplants and other saucy accidents makes up the bulk of what’s going on this show.

✅ The main ghost girl is fairly cute; The main dude is also relatively bearable and has at least one good joke in his backstory (which I won’t spoil), so the core dynamic is surprisingly fine. If the rest of the harem weren’t there, this wouldn’t be such a bad setup. 

❌ Features those dastardly breast-hiding light rays, reportedly even in the AT-X version. This doesn’t affect a large part of the show (the majority is more like the cap above), but boobies are probably still the only reason anyone cares about any of this.

♎ Certainly not good, but the lame shit of yore is not what I’m going to spend energy getting mad at in 2018. The 24 minutes I’m ever going to spend with it felt more nostalgic than anything.

ANN sez: “Ninja girl Sagiri comes off the worst from the situation, with nearly all of her dialogue spent promising to beat the crap out of anyone who doesn't measure up to her moral code. I imagine there must be more to her and the rest of the supporting cast than what we've seen so far, but at the moment they seem an awful lot like stock characters.”

Sirius the Jaeger

What: A broody werewolf and his team of assorted bad dudes hunt vampires in 30s Tokyo.

✅✅ Looks ace, this is an action show with deluxe everything. It better, because being directed by Masahiro Ando is pretty much the start and end of this show’s unique selling points.

✅ Interwar Tokyo with a bit of a gothick twist is a cool setting, and this show can afford to portray it properly.

❌ Seriously though... edgy vampires and edgier werewolves. Come on, son.

❌ Just like Banana Fish, this is a highly polished implementation of something that fundamentally isn’t very interesting to me.

✅ I’d still take it over Fanana Bish because this doesn’t seem to take itself so bloody seriously and is far more comfortable with just being moody action schlock. It’s also less showoffy, believe it or not. What else are you going to watch? Sirius the Jaeger is what you’re going to watch. Sorry.

ANN sez: They only have a preview from Anime Expo, and that boils down to “The second episode is where things start to get interesting.“ I sure hope so.

Well, we got a few acceptable shows in if nothing else, I’ll leave it up to you to figure out which ones those are. I’m cutting my losses here, see you in three months for a hopefully more bountiful season.

#anime #summer2018 #impressions #Asobi Asobase #Hyakuren no Haou to Seiyaku no Valkyria #Jashin-chan Dropkick #Phantom in the Twilight #Kyoto Teramachi Sanjou no Holmes #Shinya! Tensai Bakabon #Angolmois - Genkou Kassenki #Lord of Vermilion - Guren no Ou #grand blue #happy sugar life #Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight #Yuragi-sou no Yuuna-san #sirius the jaeger

[mogagarin]

Interpol (self-titled): 'Success' and 'Memory Serves'

Album: Interpol (self-titled), 2010

(bouncing back to Matador, from Capitol's Our Love to Admire release in 2007)

I'm starting with this album because I think it gets very unfairly overlooked.  As far as I can see, critics (and perhaps many fans?), listened to it way too quick, and didn't let it sink it.  Mea culpa: I was a fan who initially 'didn't get it' in the first few listens.  I think I was expecting OLTA II.  I'm pretty astounded at my past self, because now Interpol ranks up at either second equal (on a good day) or a healthy third favourite out of all their albums, and so therefore I'm out to punt for it, bigtime.

Since I'm starting with this album, there's gonna be a lot of context as I build my methodology, and get my keywords straight.  Other entries are gonna rely upon a bunch o'stuff I say here, but I'll try to cross-reference when it's helpful to illustrate a point.

'Success'

Instrumentation: there's a deceptively gentle, building start to this song.  Mind you, against gentleness is the fact that the kick drum is so subsonic, and I kid myself to think it's mimicking an irregular heartbeat (sort of fits the theme of the lyrics).  Piano notes in the left channel, and guitar notes pick out the peaks and strung-along troughs of this ECG.  Kick drum moves from gorgeously subsonic low tone (on vinyl, SO GOOD) to a more detailed high tone, the slap of the beater hitting the drum skin now defined, matching the high-tone brightness of the guitar (single notes in left channel, strum in right).  Still, there's a lot of space - Sam's in first gear, Daniel's coaxing, taking his time - everything is languid, and Paul's vocals lilt, until "good eye”: these promising words undercut by a slightly sinister confessional-style delivery.

But the song reveals its true self at the 1:09 mark – there's a subtle, urgent and restrained fury to the way the chaps start to play at from this point: a lot of great 'attack' in where the beats land, where the strums shred.  Bass and drums are particularly well locked-in to each other (an Interpol calling card), and for the most part sit on the front of the 'one' beat (first, second and fourth are up-front, but third lags behind, calling you to dance).  The momentum and attitude of the instruments isn't frenzied, but it's no longer languid, and feels on the verge of violence, threat, or despair.  The contrast between the start versus the way the song unfolds has always struck me like the feeling of walking up to the edge of a cliff - view, view, view, vista, vista, vista THREAT!

There are terrifically attractive exceptions to that front of the 'one' beat though – bass (lovely high tone, some tube growl) syncopates in the verse, and the contrast of this dancing against front of the beat draws attention to both aspects.  Same goes for some of the lead guitar – where DK is putting the plucks is nicely counterpointed against the main driving rhythm.  Interpol are so skilled at this – it means you kinda get two or more rhythms for the price of one – you have the main beat, all monumental and driving and inescapable, but underneath you have eddies that pick out a double-beat alongside the main, or syncopate against it.  I think it's my favourite quality of theirs.  Even Paul is going all Sinatra on the vocal phrasing and placement – he croons, and then leans towards a staccato delivery at times, picking up on that shudder-flutter the rest of the band flirt with.  Rhythm guitar and lead guitar interweave, both alternating between the languid note-to-note slide heard in the initial opening guitar, and the staccato that matches that initial kick drum rhythm.  Sam mostly stays on the main driving beat, but adds a gorgeous flutter on high-hats and subtle double and triple hits (almost a shuffle, but with sticks instead of brushes) on the snare.  Where he places them is terrific – contrast his restrained, almost agonized beats in the verse against the straight-ahead release of the chorus.  YUM.  I'm sure I can detect some real subtle hand-claps in the last third (pretty much maelstrom outro) section, but that might just be my imagination :D

Arrangement/structure: Interpol is an album that features a lot of really simple, don't-fuck-with-it ideas – generally the arrangement/structure is one main riff, all the way through, which develops and mutates and evolves, gets more intense, but the band have sagely decided NOT to throw in an arbitrary bridge or startlingly different chorus for the sake of change.  Feels to me as if the songs are leading, or at least the musicians are thinking with their hearts and guts, rather than thinking with their heads and over-intellectualizing it.  The Interpol album songs tend to be organic: the songs feed upon themselves and grow, and the humans stay the fuck out of the way.  Interpol do both modes well, but I prefer the "one riff run into the ground" organic approach that appears in 'Success'.  However, there is a delicate difference between verse and chorus here – just a subtle note change, but nothing as distracting as a key change.  This minor difference between the sections of the song echo the gorgeous counterpoint in beat/momentum, surge and shuffle, monoslab drive and syncopative flutter.  Ah, I love you guys.  There's also a sweet sweet attempt at a late bridge in that gorgeous waterfall guitar transition, around 3 min 5 sec (mostly left channel) - it's gorgeously transcendent, and runs the song out into a sort of negative space for me.

Lyrical content: I love the confessional tone to content/delivery of the vocals.  That initial promise of "good eye" is empty, even if meant with good intentions, and that reneged claim is backed up later with other half-truths, confessions, and appeals for help: "somebody make me say 'no, no, no'".  Paul (in interview, apparently with The Sun on September 10, 2010 - but I've been unable to track this down) talked about basing his lyrics on the topic of people "cracking up and losing the plot”, thanks to a "narcissistic impulse” (ie celebrities, believing their own hype, to the point of destroying themselves as they get more and more disengaged from reality and meaningful connection with others).

Overall context - vinyl version: holy shit the vinyl version of this will blow your speakers, if you have it over a certain volume (and well, it's Interpol, so of course you have it UP LOUD), and I can't think of a better way for speakers to go.  Great full-spectrum sound, from the crystalline trebles, through to lush mids, all the way through to those initial subsonic Sam beats in the opening.  Terrific vinyl transfer (for the whole album).

Overall context, feel/tone: a little risky to put something so dark and doomed right at the front of the album, but then again, it's fricken catchy AF - you want to dance, despite the doom.      I must admit, I almost always listen to albums on shuffle (on my beloved 160GB black iPod, all tracks 320+ bitrate!), when I'm not listening to vinyl, but whenever 'Success' comes along, it does a great job at telling me, "Hey.  I'm the first track.  Take me or leave me."  And I'm like, "OK, then.  BTW, I love you.”       Additionally, the monumental inescapable drive of the song makes me feel as though I'm in the head of someone who's spaced out, who feels stuck on one nihilistic track, a persona feeling divorced from reality.  Of course, I don't refer in any way, shape or form to Mr Paul Banks, which is why I say 'persona' – if you can't tell the difference between vocalist and the words, go read up on the literary device of a narrative persona.

'Memory Serves'

Instrumentation: This is gonna be a long, indulgent, rave of deep love :D  Bear with ...      Gorgeous textured reverb on the opening guitar (mainly right channel), play style leaning towards Dick Dale tremolo picking.  Interestingly enough, this is very slightly heralded in 'Success' - there's tremolo (in play style, not just pedal effect) guitar in the background (see 1 min 25 secs onwards, of mostly left-channel tremolo-played guitar of 'Success').  Back to 'Memory Serves': you might just be able to hear vocals panned over to the left channel - Paul picking out the notes, not pushing his voice beyond talking into singing - nicely spooky (and there are other vocal artefacts throughout this album too, pointing towards quite a "live" recording environment.  I adore how the band often decides to leave these "proofs of life" in the track, especially when it comes to pedal jack noise, or the sound of dirty pots [ie the switches and dials of a beloved pedal, as much a part of the character of sound produced as the main function of a pedal]).

But wow, when the vocals croak in - Paul's deliberately keeping his throat part-closed (vocal fry!), especially on the open vowels at the start of the bars (ie "It ... / I"), giving the impression of weariness, of a character that's given up, despite the content of the pleading that this voice gives in this song.  PB's backing vocal echoes off to the left - what is it with this album, and favouring the left?  The guitar has built up some great tension, and that is released so attractively in the vocals wearily spilling onto the track, the 60± bpm beat which lurches along.  It's hypnotic, and on the verge of tears.  Add pleading content, and you get a sexy AF tune.  I think I'm gonna conclude, after I analyse all the songs, that this album would be shaggable if it was a person :D

Beautifully resonant piano in the verse, picking out the chord notes - oh, how I'd love to hear that piano in that room: makes me wonder if they'd captured a bit of the studio room sound?  First verse has that catchy double-beat bass, almost like a waltz, locked into the double beat of the kick.  The tension is fed by a held bar (about 16 seconds - 4 x 4?), forcing you to anticipate a chorus, but guess what - VERSE.  Subverting expectations.  I've heard this song SO often (I think it's my second or third favourite song on the album, so yeah, I've thrashed it), and love the slow churn apocalyptic beauty of the climax, that I really WANT the chorus at this specific point, after the held bar.  But no, more teasing ....

The bass sheers away in the second verse; it's a little bit more spare, with less fidelity to the double beat of the kick.  It's an unusual choice - usually Interpol amp up the stakes and detail, slowly; but to move away from complexity into something minimal is odd, UNTIL you realise it's done to emphasise what's about to hit - oh yeah baby, it's gonna be a wall of sound, and you know it's coming.  How wonderfully this band build pressure, only to let the listener have release.  (Note also that Sam adds a small amount of further detail in what he's playing, up on the top half of the kit - slightly more snare hits, slightly more hi-hat taps - the converse of what Carlos is taking away with bass notes.  Cool as.)

And, of course, when this third verse comes in, it's more tense than the preceding two, and features a background swathe of a (slightly left-channel) guitar (am guessing Paul on rhythm - I bet you he does this live; must make mental note to check YewToob, and confirm/deny album-based speculation here) which rings out across its strings at the very start of these verse bars.  More is now at stake, and we listeners are told to anticipate incoming ...

Incoming!  Delicious, delicious chorus.  Sam ups the sibilance by cooking the hi-hat beat: it would be jazz, but he opts for a laboured and tortured feel, to suit the lyrics.  The resonant guitar gets more frenetic, choral, and vocal overdubs take the song into wall-of-sound land (my favourite country, I think).  The bass modulates into fifths and octaves, some simultaneously strummed/plucked, and alongside the vocal overdubs and extra guitar, there's just so much lush harmony.  But wait, it's gonna get even BETTER!  Keyboard/organ comes in at the end of the chorus, and carries on through the bridge to the next chorus ... and this is where the song has evolved to.  A good time for me to skip over to structure ...

Arrangement/structure:  There are some conscious decisions in this, such as the held bar, but it does feel to me as if the band lets the song lead them by the nose - we never go back to the verse.  It's done its job.  The song evolves into a new beast, as though the speaker has finished one set of thoughts (compromise, trying to keep a relationship going when it's already over), and finds himself stuck between special memories, and "I'll wait to find / it's over" (gorgeously effective enjambment: notice how one half of that thought is in the chorus, the second half falls in the bridge), to the relationship half-restarting: "why is it so hard to stay / a / way?"  There's a horrifically discordant guitar in the left can here, 2 min 27 secs, through for a few seconds - it's just under the lush harmonies, and Interpol never do anything out of tune.  But here it is, so effectively throwing a spanner in the works.  Doesn't matter if you don't notice it - you know something is wrong.  It's a flicker of pain.

I hate to rush this next part, as the song doesn't, but where we might expect a held bar, or a tease; the song evolves once again, at the transition from chorus to something new at 3 min 5 sec.  What happens isn't verse or chorus; it's stratospheric.  Carlos strums multiple strings, and pulls back to single notes and perhaps the odd fifth or octave, the vocals pile up into a choir of multiple choices and regrets (sorry if I'm getting purple in my prose here), and the whole tune soars again at 3 min 33 sec, the soaring really thickened by immense keyboard chords. 

This is really rather moving if you happen to be listening through headphones in public :D  Two climaxes, two releases, in one song.  Ecstasy, even if at 3 min 47 sec the band tries to corral the song back onto the ground by returning to the verse notes and structure.  4 min 2 sec is another liftoff, and this is where hints of outro start to appear (and I get morose that the song is mortal, and will end): see if you can pick up that slow arpeggio bright guitar - wholly DK in style, with his angular sparkiness - it appears just after this last liftoff, and it signals the last guitar you hear in the song; a sad, solo coda, which fades away, while PB's voice moves from a begging tone, to something resigned and uncaring, and the drum beat goes on.  Life goes on.

Lyrical content: I especially love the lines:

It would be no price to pay I only ever lie to make you smile All kinds of dust are gonna keep me satisfied But only at your place, only at your place ...

It reminds me of compromise, in a relationship, when it's already over.  Tragic and beautiful.

Thanks for bearing with me.  I'll put in more links soon, and a section that does justice to the overall album.  Next up: 'Summer Well' and 'Lights'.

Last week I was in Sydney, seeing a rocking gig, full of feels and musical expertise, and a band giving it full 100%.  Sigh :D (Note: written back in January, 2019 ... just now ported over this content from a blog, into Tumblr. While I'm swamped with wonderful writing jobs at the moment, this abandoned rave was playing on my mind ...)

#interpol band #interpol album #music analysis

[lincolnslog-blog1]

Our Peter Pan/Storybook Nursery Reveal! 

I am ecstatic to reveal Lincoln’s nursery. Before sharing my labor and delivery story, introducing my little boy, or posting any of the content I was originally going to share…I thought giving you a look inside my home into the nursery would be a good start. 

When I found out I was pregnant with a boy, I became obsessed with choosing the perfect nursery theme. I wanted something that would grow with him and not seem too…well, baby-ish. I went through the nursery inspiration boards on pinterest, discussed potential ideas with family and friends, and spent literally days just choosing a paint color. All grey’s are not the same, people! 

Since I grew up watching and loving all things Disney, I thought “what could be a better theme than my all time favorite movie?” And so, our Peter Pan/Neverland-esque nursery was born…er, well more so the idea was born. The nursery itself took countless {very pregnant} days to complete. And truly I still find myself adding new pieces and re-arranging furniture (but that could have something to do with my perfectionism). 

Now try to keep in mind, I am a lover of neutrals {whites, greys, tans}, so the inspiration of Peter Pan is found mostly in the details of the nursery rather than the whole room itself. ALAS, here is my favorite room in the house. Lincoln’s Neverland nursery. So we begin with how you see the nursery as you’re walking through the door. On the wall to the right sits the crib. We purchased this crib from ikea. The current fitted sheet is a cute arrow print we received from our registry at our baby shower. On the far wall is the closet (closed for now, but I will do a separate post to share our closet organization as well as what’s inside the dresser and armoire). Also on this wall to the left of the closet is a custom wooden wall sign I had a local woodworking momma make for our sweet nursery, a quote from Peter Pan of course. Below it sits a blanket ladder that the fiancé and I made, with 3 blankets that we received at the baby shower. (We also made a larger, chunkier one for the living room that I will share a separate DIY post for). I wanted this one to be thin and smaller to fit the vibe of the room. In the corner of the room is my beloved rocker that I scored for $65 from a going out of business sale at a local overstock shop. I paired it with a small, shaggy storage ottoman. We received the small children’s rocker as a gift to Lincoln for his first Christmas and I thought it was just the cutest addition. I can’t wait for him to use it to read, watch movies in, maybe even take a little snooze in once he’s older. The wall on the left side of the room holds 2 book ledges we purchased from Ikea. I really want Lincoln to enjoy reading like I do…so what better way than to fill the room with books? We still have an over abundance of books that don’t fit on the shelves, so I will soon purchase more. As we keep moving, there’s a large window with grey curtains purchased from ikea that we have pulled back with little white lanterns hanging on the hardware. We have a large white armoire that was given to us from family friends that we love dearly. On the top, I placed a cute little decoration used at our baby shower with Peter Pan figurines. A dear family friend made the ship and I absolutely love the details she included (notice the letters on the flags, Lincoln’s initials). Finally on the last wall, to the left as you’re walking in sits what might be my favorite piece in the nursery. I bought this antique tiger oak dresser from a local family that was moving out of state and didn’t have a need for it anymore. The family’s one request was that it go to someone that hold give it life again. Once I told her the use for it in my child’s nursery, she broke down in tears. It still hold the original stain color. The only change we made to modernize it was to swap out the old hardware for the cute feather pulls on the drawers. We disassembled the mirror that was attached because of safety concern since the dresser serves dual purpose as a changing table! Once again, one of my favorite pieces. We purchased the changing mat from target, as well as the grey plush sheet, and with the small lamp that sits on the right side. Above the dresser is another {smaller} picture ledge we purchased from ikea. On it sits a wall sign that I made out of a plain wooden frame (found on clearance) and Peter Pan wall decals! This was a shot in the dark and I was SO nervous…but I’m glad to say it turned out great. There is also a plush TIC TOC crock and cute off white clock on the picture ledge. Both of these were used as decor for our baby shower…which if I didn’t mention was Peter Pan themed! If you have made it through this long post, I’m so glad you’re still with me. I am so proud of this room and constructing it is one of my favorite memories from pregnancy. I think Lincoln will love this nursery for years to come.

#nursery #inspiration #baby #neverland #peter pan #nevergrowup #reveal

[edream93]

Headcanon: How many kingdoms/lands are a part of Auradon

Okay so this is my half thought out idea of how the United States of Auradon came to be and the current landscape of it, mostly for my story “We’ll Light the Fuse” but I guess in general as well. Sorry for any spelling issues:

The Original Kingdoms/Lands

The original kingdoms were the first kingdoms that joined together to create the United States of Auradon, similar to I guess the 13 colonies of the United States of America. (I’ll explain what would have been the Britain equivalent in a different post later. Maybe.)

“The Golden Age” films:

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

Pinocchio

Fantasia (putting this here more to confirm that the events of this film happened and not really to say that there’s a specific kingdom).

Dumbo

Bambi

“The Silver Age” films:

Cinderella

Alice in Wonderland

Peter Pan

Lady and the Tramp

Sleeping Beauty

One Hundred and One Dalmatians

The Sword and the Stone

The Jungle Book

“The Dark Age”/”The Bronze Age” films:

The Aristocats

Robin Hood

The Rescuers

The Fox and the Hound

The Great Mouse Detective

Oliver and Company

“The Disney Renaissance” films:

The Littler Mermaid

Beauty and the Beast

Aladdin

The Lion King

Pocahontas

The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Hercules

Mulan 

Tarzan --> Tarzan doesn’t necessarily participate in Auradon’s politics but the land is protected by Auradon and it’s a crime to try to hunt any of his gorilla family.

So as mentioned before, the above movies and their settings all happened before Auradon was formed and their locations can, in some way be thought of as the original kingdoms that joined together and voted for the Isle (obviously not unanimously but that’s a post for another time).

The Kingdoms/Lands That Eventually Joined Auradon 

Now, these are the kingdoms/lands who weren’t sure about whether they wanted to join Auradon. They initially weren’t excited to give one person, “The High King”, power over their lands. For whatever reason though, they eventually joined Auradon soon after the Isle’s creation.

“The Second Dark Age”/ “Post-Renaissance Era” films:

The Emperor’s New Groove --> Originally, Kuzco didn’t want to join Auradon but sometime during the events of “The Emperor’s New School” the economy of his kingdom plummeted due to crop failure and the slight unstableness that was left after Yzma was defeated. (She may have been a villain but she was honestly the only thing keeping the empire somewhat stable during Kuzco’s pre-llama days). The advisors who were watching over the kingdom while their Emperor was completing his education panicked and took the offer of help that Auradon offered in exchange for them joining the United States of Auradon and sending Yzma to the Isle. Kuzco and Kronk did try to fight to keep Yzma from being sent to the Isle (yeah, she did try to kill Kuzco and take his empire away from him but she was honestly the only family he remembered having before meeting Pacha, so that’s gotta count for something right?) but in the end, since Kuzco had still yet to marry and have an heir in case of a worst case scenario (Yzma trying to get revenge on him again) his group of advisors didn’t listen and signed the papers to ship Yzma off to the Isle of the Lost. 

Lilo and Stitch --> At first, this little island nation wasn’t even on Auradon’s map in terms of political power. However, after the arrival of Experiment 626 aka Stitch, and the realization that there are others out there in the universe, Auradon pulled the land of Hawaii in on the agreement that Stitch or his creator would not be forced to go to the Isle of the Lost (remember, Stitch hates water and the Isle only gets junk so it would have to take a few years at least before he would have been able to break out) if they joined Auradon as representatives of Auradon (and kind of the entire world) as their ambassador for the Galatic Council. If Stitch failed to mention that he’s not on the best of terms with the council and the only reason why the Council hasn’t just destroyed the Earth is because of mosquitoes, well, that’s Auradon’s fault for not being smart enough to know. Stitch is just glad to be able to stay with Lilo (who is the same age in the film) and their small family.

Meet the Robinsons --> In terms of this movie’s timeline, it’s been a several years after the movie and Lewis’s company is small but quickly growing, especially with King Adam and Fairy Godmother trying to retire magic.

“The Second Disney Renaissance”/ “The Revival Era” films:

Princess and the Frog --> The city-state of New Orleans joined Auradon a year or two after the USA was first formed. 

Tangled --> The King and Queen of Corona were at first hesitant to join Auradon when initially offered. They had lost so much with the disappearance of their daughter. However, after Rapunzel was returned to them by the infamous Flynn Rider aka Eugene, the King and Queen decided they needed to take the necessary precautions to make sure something like that never happened to anyone in their kingdom again. Rapunzel though didn’t like the idea of resurrecting dead villains and putting them on an Isle to serve as punishment. Though Mother Gothel was emotionally abusive and had kidnapped her and lied to her for all of her life, she was still her mother. There were still numerous times that she could remember Gothel either being a very good actor or somewhat genuinely caring for her. Her parents had already decided however and the agreements were made. A few years later, when the census was taken, and Rapunzel saw the new name Ginny Gothel she cried because she had essentially done what Gothel had did to this little child: take away the childhood she should have had. When Ben proposed to give the children of the Isle a chance, Queen Rapunzel was the first one to sign and support the new boy king.

Big Hero 6 --> It was very recently, like at some point during the beginning of Ben’s teenage years that San Fransokyo joined Auradon (though the events of the film happened years before that, when Ben was like 5 or 6) and only under the condition that they could choose what to do with their “villains”. 

The Kingdoms/Lands That Are Allies But Are Not A Part of Auradon

These kingdoms/lands of these films were not about having King Adam (the Beast) ruling over them but also didn’t want to start a fight with an ever growing super-kingdom:

Atlantis: The Lost Empire --> We’re actually keeping the timeline with Atlantis so at this point it’s been over a hundred years since the events of this movie. Though Atlantis is no longer just a myth and has allied with Auradon, Queen Kida and her husband are not idiots and don’t trust someone with a temper like King Adam to have full control and say over the crystals of Atlantis. Plus, Kida is a BAMF queen and she’s not going to let some former beast rule over her.

Treasure Planet --> Goes along with the Stitch being part of the Galatic Council bit. Someone from the movie, maybe Jim, is also part of that Council. Overall, the council doesn’t really do much on earth though every now and again, they’re interested in what the earthlings called “magic” (they chuckle because they understand the complex theories behind “magic” that takes it from hocus pocus to actual science) and their desire to repress something that is so natural. 

Brother Bear --> Mostly keeps to themselves though will come out in full swing if Auradon gets lazy about protecting the environment.

Frozen --> Same as with Atlantis. Queen Elsa doesn’t have time for King Adam (though she and Queen Belle always meet up for brunch or something whenever they’re in one or the other’s lands) and his pettiness and she’s a BAMF queen who doesn’t need a king and will not hesitate to freeze anyone who tries to attack her kingdom. 

Brave --> Haven’t figured out exactly where this fits but just going to put them under haven’t joined for now.

And that’s all I got. What do you think?

#disney descendants #descendants headcanons #Auradon #The United States of Auradon #idk how time is supposed to work in this place #edream93 #we'll light the fuse

[foodandwriting]

Ravioli, Ravioli, I Like Me Some Butternut Squash Ravioli

Blogger: Vima Villalba

          “Ravioli Ravioli Give Me the Formuoli”—a sweet chant in an episode from the legendary children’s television show, Spongebob Squarepants. I began my post this way because ravioli will be the hot topic for today, I love ravioli, and I also enjoy fun rhymes, so no other introduction could have been more fitting.

           I remember when I was in the 3rd or 4th grade, and my mom used to work late into the evenings, I had to rely on canned or microwaveable foods to sustain me, because at that time I didn’t know how to cook. Chef Boyardee was one of my favourite canned foods, and I specifically favoured the raviolis over the other pastas. Of course, when you’re a kid, you think that everything tastes SO GREAT, but now as an adult you realize how naïve you were and move on to better things. While Chef Boyardee’s ravioli will always have a special place in my heart, I have tried and tasted sophisticated and different kinds of raviolis from various restaurants throughout my adolescence and adulthood.

           One of my preferences is the classic Spinach and Ricotta Cheese Ravioli. The creamy, rich texture of the stuffing, in combination with the tartness of the tomato sauce drizzled on top, is a taste that never gets old. It’s also a simple dish to make which makes it more appealing. Personally, I have never made Spinach and Ricotta Cheese Ravioli, but I have made Spinach and Ricotta Cheese Stuffed Jumbo Pasta Shells, layered with the Classico Sweet Basil Marinara sauce and it tasted heavenly. I decided to mention this, because the only difference is the fact that I used Jumbo shells and not wrap it inside the ravioli dough. Other than the experience of eating those dishes, I would assume that they pretty much taste the same.  

           Another great dish that I’ve tried is a squash-filled ravioli—this is what I will be blogging about today. I’ve tried the Ravioli de Zucca from Terroni (the Adelaide location), which is stuffed with butternut squash and parmigiana, and covered with walnuts and gorgonzola sauce. It was a pleasant dish because when I bit into the ravioli, I tasted the sweetness from the squash, as well as the sharp taste of Gorgonzola from the smooth sauce. Another instance where I’ve tried a similar ravioli was at Scaddabush, an Italian restaurant that I truly adore. Their Zucca Ravioli is a dish where the hazelnut butter cream sauce, topped with poor man’s parmesan and fried sage envelop the butternut squash and Grana Padano filled raviolis. I also prefer this one over Ravioli de Zucca because when you take a bite you get both the cushiony and crunchy texture all at once from the filling and poor man’s parmesan. It’s like a party of vegetables and cooked dough in your mouth!

           I thought it would be a great idea to learn how to make this dish at home, so that I could save money and in the near future, experiment with the sauces that go with the stuffing. I was initially wary about using the brown butter sauce instead of something else (mostly because of the fact that the sauce is 90% butter), but this homemade dish tasted better than I thought. I find that the hazelnut and sage really compliment the brown butter sauce. Hence, if for any reason you wanted to omit any ingredient, I would strongly urge you to keep the sage because the sage makes all the difference in the flavour. Since it is fried, there will not be a strong, pungent taste, but rather a subtle flavour. In terms of the mixture, feel free to go all the way with mushing the squash or keeping the filling chunky. Moreover, the original recipe did not include hazelnuts as part of the filling, but I prefer to have the crunch and thought that it would taste better with the finely chopped hazelnuts in the squash mixture. If you choose to follow this idea, just add a bit of hazelnuts, because a majority of the hazelnuts will be needed for the sauce. Most of my thoughts while making this dish will be added with the subtitle ‘commentary’, because I had some trouble while making this dish. For example, I did not have most of the specific materials needed for this recipe, nevertheless, the pasta came out great so my testimony to you is: if you believe, you achieve!

           That’s enough blabbering for now, and I hope you get the chance to try this one out!

          I adopted this recipe from Buzzfeed’s Tasty, and the original recipe (which has simpler instructions) can be found here: https://tasty.co/recipe/easy-butternut-squash-ravioli

 Ingredients

2 small onions or 1 big onion, diced

1 whole butternut squash (small), skinned and chopped into cubes

4 cloves of garlic, minced

1 tablespoon of brown sugar

15 sage leaves (washed)

A little bit over ¼ cup chopped hazelnuts

2 cups flour

4 eggs

Olive oil

5 tablespoons of Butter

1 lemon

Salt & Pepper, to taste

Grated parmesan cheese

Specific Materials

Rolling Pin

Food Processor

Ice cube tray

Directions

Pre-heat the oven to 425°F (220°C)

For the Squash Stuffing

1)    Combine the chopped squash, diced onions, and minced garlic into a baking pan. Drizzle approximately 2 tablespoons of olive oil on top, then add salt and pepper to taste.

Commentary: To be honest, I just drizzled on what I thought was going to be 2 tablespoons of olive oil (LOL).

2)    Toss everything until the onions, garlic, and squash are fully coated with the salt, pepper, and olive oil.

3)    Place in the oven and bake for 30 minutes or until the squash is a nice golden-brown colour.

4)    Once the squash is ready, transfer it into a food processor, and add the brown sugar, a little bit of chopped hazelnuts, and parmesan cheese into the mixture. Pulse it until there are no lumps and the texture is smooth. Set it aside to cool down.

Commentary: Instead of a food processor, I used the magic bullet to blend out the mixture and it actually broke in the process, so I had to manually puree the squash mixture myself. I can confidently say that manually mixing the squash mixture turned out to be a success.

For the Pasta Dough

5)    It is best to make the dough while the squash is in the oven.

6)    Make sure that you clean the food processor because the dough will also be made using the processor.

7)    Mix in the flour, eggs, and 1 tablespoon of olive oil into the processor, pulsing it until the dough twirls around and turns into an enormous ball.

Commentary: It is crucial to follow these instructions because I just “eyed” the amount of olive oil that I added in, which was a very bad idea as the dough didn’t even look like dough at first (SMH). But after I cooled it and added more flour to roll it out, it looked like dough (#Winning)

8)    Take out the dough and wrap it in saran wrap.

9)    Put the wrapped dough into the refrigerator and chill for 30 minutes.

Making the Ravioli

10) Take out the ball of pasta dough from the refrigerator and cut out approximately 2 ounces, rolling it out so that the pasta sheets are thin and wide.

Commentary: You already know that I “eyeballed” 2 ounces of pasta dough.

Commentary: Also, I didn’t know why chefs always sprinkled flour all over their table when they rolled out the pasta, but now I finally understand. The reason is so that the dough doesn’t get stuck onto the table or rolling pin (I am shook).

Commentary: I have a confession to make—I did not have a rolling pin at hand, so I had to use a cylindrical glass water bottle to roll out my dough (*cries). Thus, my ravioli turned out thick as you can see in the photos.

11) Take the ice cube tray and put one pasta sheet over it, while gently pressing down on the holes, but do not break the pasta sheet. Just put enough pressure to create an indent.

12) Place approximately a tablespoon of the butternut squash filling into the holes/indents.

13) Then place another pasta sheet on top of the ice cube tray, covering the butternut squash filling. Press down on the sides of the raviolis so that the filling is sealed.  

14) Flip over the ice cube tray, cut off the excess dough, then separate the raviolis with a pizza cutter

Commentary: Any cutting tool will suffice.

15) Repeat this process until all the stuffing or dough is used up.

16) Boil water and add salt.  

Commentary: The salt prevents the raviolis from sticking together.

17) When the water is boiling, place the raviolis and wait for 2-3 minutes or until they float to the top.

18) Drain the raviolis.

For the Hazelnut Brown Butter Sauce

19) In a pan, put in 3 tablespoons of butter, the rest of the chopped hazelnuts, and the sage leaves.

20) Let it simmer until the butter is browned and until the sage leaves look a bit crispy

21) Turn off the heat and squeeze a whole lemon into the sauce, then add salt and pepper to taste.

22) To thicken the sauce, add 2 tablespoons of butter.

23) Pour the boiled raviolis and toss them around.

The pasta is ready to be served!

[alewyren]

regarding caulifla and kale, and whether or not they’re intended to be a couple: an actual serious discussion

I’ll start off by admitting that I am somewhat biased as a longtime fan of DBZ and a lesbian myself, but keep in mind that I’m also very jaded and realistic about the possibility of actual same-sex romance in non-specifically targeted media. In fact, my own personal experiences on the matter are what have given me incentive to look at LGBT issues so critically. In short, this is not just me saying “they’re totally canon, just look at them omg they’re so cute~”

Regardless of your own personal feelings towards them being a couple, there is actually a very interesting discussion to be had here.

So let’s start by taking a step back here and contextualizing this issue by talking about the inclusion of female super saiyans at all, completely independent of whether or not they are a couple. For thirty years, female super saiyans were complete fanon. They existed as OCs in video games, most notably Dragonball Heroes and Xenoverse, but were very notably and deliberately excluded from Dragonball GT. Despite this series having two characters who should, by all logic, have the potential to do so.

So the question becomes this: why, in a franchise that has had female saiyans with the potential to go super for a long time, did it take thirty years for it to actually happen in canon media?

Various justifications for this have cropped up over the years. “Pan and Bra lived in an era too peaceful to trigger the transformation”--Goten and Trunks serve as a definitive counterargument. Why could Pan and Bra have not had a similar rivalry? Was it just because it would be too similar to the relationship of Goten and Trunks, or because the relationship between two young girls was not worth exploring? Additionally, should the events of GT not been enough to trigger the transformation in either of them? Pan especially--Bra at least has the justification of not being a fighter at all, though one must wonder why, in a warrior race whose cast is comprised mostly of male characters, two of the three (Bra, Gine, Tarble) we have seen who are completely disinterested in fighting are women. It’s a statistical improbability for it to be a coincidence.

The other justifications, “Pan does not have enough Saiyan blood” and “Women just don’t have the same level of anger/emotional intensity/strength/whatever the fuck sexist BS to trigger the transformation” are and always were complete garbage.

So then, what’s the actual reason? As far as Toriyama himself goes, he said it himself. He didn’t know how to draw a female super saiyan. The logistics of drawing specific things (the spots on perfect cell come to mind) come up as an excuse or complaint for him a lot, so this... does make a sort of sense, albeit indicates unconscious sexism on his part. No, I’m not saying he just hates women, that’s clearly bogus, just that it raises questions about why the idea of drawing a muscular, spiky-haired woman was a problem at all. His solution was to dodge the issue entirely by making all the saiyans who were relevant for the majority of Z male. Trunks or Goten could have easily been female, had he wanted to go that direction, but he didn’t. Pan could have easily gone super saiyan as a five year old during the end of Z, but she didn’t. Which... fair enough, I’m not gonna sit here and demonize Toriyama or anything, especially when his views have clearly evolved. I’m merely examining his decisions and the logic behind them.

As far as GT goes, the reasoning is similar. Throughout all of GT, there is a pervasive unwillingness to introduce new ideas or take risks, which was ultimately the series’ downfall. All of the villains and concepts introduced are merely rehashes of what was already there. The Black Star Dragonballs? Born from wishes that were already made. Super 17? Literally already an existing character. Baby? Shaped by events long established in the Z anime. Super Saiyan 4? Super Saiyan+Oozaru. Some of these ideas were actually really interesting and had a lot of potential, but this is why GT so thoroughly failed in execution: it was unwilling to actually do anything new with any of its ideas or characters, so much as just rehash existing plotlines. Female super saiyans, of course, would have been something very new to the franchise, which is why it never happened.

This can, of course, be contrasted with post-Battle of Gods media, which has done nothing but invent brand new lore and ideas for the universe. Gods of Destruction and their angels, the existence of the multiverse, Super Saiyan God and its related transformations, Goku Black being... actually a legitimately interesting character rather than Turles 2.0, Frieza being relevant in terms of power again instead of a laughingstock, you get the picture. Some people don’t like this, because it goes in such a different direction from the original source material and feels like a series of ass pulls. Other people think it’s a breath of fresh air, and that any contrivances are ultimately to the benefit of the franchise. Regardless of where you stand here, the difference in approach is quite notable, and Super has certainly been objectively more successful than GT despite its very rough start.

Also quite notably, Super has been taking steps to give its female characters more spotlight than Z or GT ever did. While the depictions of Chichi and Videl have been... flawed, Bulma’s been given plenty to do, 18 has kept both her power and her personality, Pan has been absolutely adorable and widely beloved in contrast to her GT counterpart, and that’s not even going into the new characters introduced. Vados? At the time of her introduction, arguably the strongest character in the franchise, and hilariously snarky to boot. Future Mai? Awesome. Nothing more to be said there, Future Mai is just awesome. And with the increasing popularity of the aforementioned Heroes and Xenoverse, the demand and love for female super saiyans among the fanbase was quite clear.

So by the time of the Universe Survival Arc, it was less a matter of if we would ever get a female super saiyan, but when. Everything was pointing in that direction, especially as Super seemed to be going out of its way to address fan wants and criticisms as the show progressed.

Enter Female Broly.

For those of you who may not have been following the fandom when the first trailer for the Universe Survival Arc dropped, this was like a freaking nuclear bomb being dropped on the community. Not only did we learn that we were getting a canon version of a controversial movie villain, which ruffled quite a few jimmies in and of itself, but it was confirmed--we were getting a girl super saiyan. A powerful, relevant one, by the look of it. Any concerns about giving the girls “unattractive” bulging muscles or spiky hair? Yeah, no, those were fucking annihilated on the spot, and they were clearly showing that off.

Some people weren’t happy about this, though, for a variety of reasons. Most notably, that the first female super saiyan would be a rehash of an already existing male character, rather than her own person. Others were just excited that a girl saiyan was happening and she was strong and awesome, others were excited that we were getting a canon version of Broly. Regardless of where you stood, the discourse and speculation was absolutely wild. Was she Cabba’s sister, or possibly even girlfriend? A U6 Saiyan princess? Or perhaps from another universe entirely? We had no idea. But we were hyped as hell.

So the actual arc rolled along, and surprise surprise, we met even more awesome female characters from other universes. The angels Cus, Marcarita, and Martinu, for starters, as well as the God of Destruction Helles (though there is a conversation to be had about why the only female GoD is the sexy one obsessed with beauty, but tbh I really don’t care all that much because she’s hot and I’m gay) and Ribrianne, who were all shaping up to be relevant and powerful characters. Not to mention that 18 herself was going to be getting spotlight again, and that Bra was introduced at last. Almost like the times had changed and the newest installment in the series was trying to be more inclusive and progressive. Even Daishinkan outright commented that the female warriors in the tournament were worth keeping an eye on.

It wasn’t perfect, by any means--many of the girls introduced were cute and humanoid in appearance unlike the bizarre and diverse designs of the male fighters, and male characters still make up a large majority of the characters introduced, especially as far as top tier contenders go, but it’s a huge step in the right direction for the franchise, and one I’m personally quite satisfied with. I love every last one of my new alien daughters.

The point is, despite all this, nobody even thought that we wouldn’t just be getting one female Super Saiyan; we’d be getting two. When we met Caulifla, despite her design and personality being very different from what little we knew of the mysterious girl Broly, damn near everyone assumed they were one and the same. Which tbh, says a lot for how little we’ve come to expect from DB’s female cast. It was only later, when we saw Caulifla and Kale in the same room, that we knew for sure they were different characters.

Caulifla, for her part, seems to be deliberately tailored to address the initial criticism that people had of female Broly--that is, the first female super saiyan wasn’t her own character, but a carbon copy of an existing male character. Because of how long it took for the series to actually introduce female super saiyans, there was a long time for those expectations to accumulate--and by the look of it, much like with the similarly scrutinized re-resurrection of Frieza, Super was intent on doing it right. 

Caulifla was very deliberately introduced before Kale, went super saiyan before Kale, and her personality was much more in line with the toughness we had come to expect from the saiyans. Quite notably so, in fact, considering the U6 saiyans as a whole are much nicer than their U7 counterparts. But no, the first female saiyan? A tough delinquent girl who takes shit from noone. For the most part, she fulfilled the expectations we all had of her. Kale is a bit more divisive, albeit moreso in the western fandom (the JP fandom adores her, and loves that she’s a match for Goku), but imagine for a moment if Caulifla didn’t exist. If the first female super saiyan was a spineless weakling who only showed strength in a completely unnatural form that overtook her personality, and was ripped straight from an existing male character. The unfortunate implications would have been palpable. Especially if, say, it was Cabba, not Caulifla, that was the target of her jealousy.

My guess? The ideas of female super saiyans and a U6 Broly were both brought up in the brainstorming for the Universe Survival Arc, and were both quite popular among the writers. Combining them came up, the writers really liked the idea of a female Broly, but realized quickly that it would not work on its own. And that’s how Caulifla was born--so they could have their cake and eat it too.

Which finally brings us to the conundrum of Kale and Caulifla’s relationship. What’s the deal?

The popular assumption when they were introduced was that there would be a love triangle in which they both wanted Cabba, or that at least one of them would be romantically involved with him. Which, fair enough, DB does kind of have a track record of introducing cool girlfriends for existing male characters, and introducing two whole girls was kind of new territory. Most people assumed, when the preview for episode 92 dropped and Kale appeared to have jealousy issues, that it was Cabba she was jealous of (I called that it was Caulifla, though, albeit not necessarily romantically--it honestly just made more sense given what we knew of them, but nobody believed me. I get bragging rights~). 

This really isn’t the fandom’s fault, though--quite simply, in the entire franchise, we have not had one meaningful female/female relationship. Not one. Not familial, not a friendship, and certainly not a romance. I can’t be assed to figure out if OG dragonball, Z, or GT ever passed the bechdel test, but the fact that I don’t know off the top of my head says a lot. Now, keep in mind that the bechdel test is not in and of itself an indication of sexism--that’s not what I’m saying here. But it does indicate the lack of meaningful relationships between women, which is a separate problem. A problem which, since relationships between women and precedents thereof are actually relevant to this discussion, is worth commenting on here.

Regardless of how you want to spin it, Caulifla and Kale are very close, and despite speculation it’s safe to conclude neither of them have any meaningful interest in Cabba, at least not currently. That’s... actually kind of a big deal, that two women are mutually the most important character to each others’ development like that. Especially when it would have been easier to justify their inclusion as being already close to Cabba, or hell even Hit or Frost. It’s quite rare that you have honest to god meaningful and emotionally rich relationships between two women in shounen anime, romantic or otherwise.

And no, I’m not saying “female friendships are rare and important so they shouldn’t be gay!” Female friendships are important, yes, and I hope DBS continues to explore the relationships between its female characters. But romance between women is also important, and even more of a rarity than friendship. No, what I’m trying to say is that Kale and Caulifla being so close is already quite a progressive move in a series that really needed it, and it’s clearly deliberately intended as such. While the line between pandering and deliberate attempts at representation can be a bit blurry at times, I think this falls pretty squarely on the side of the latter.

So that finally brings us to the big question. They’re close, yes, but to what extent can their bond be interpreted as romantic, to what extent was it intended to be that way, and where do the writers intend to take their relationship? Is it just fans seeing things where nothing is there, pandering or queerbaiting to draw interest for the new characters, or an actual intended canon relationship?

Well, at this point, it’s impossible to say with absolute certainty whether they are indeed gay. I’m not gonna sugarcoat it, though. Saying that any attempts to paint their relationship as romantic are just fans being delusional, or insisting that they are certainly just friends, is utter and complete nonsense. It’s certainly more reasonable to interpret them as being a couple than any other two women in the franchise. If you’re going around telling people to stop having fun guys, they’re just friends, you’re an asshole. Especially because a lot of people shipping them are gay themselves. Like, holy shit, is that really so wrong?

That aside, though, there are actual legitimate, tangible hints something else is going on. As in, it’s not like shipping Goku and Vegeta or pointing to something as intangible and subjective as supposed sexual tension. A much better comparison would be the buildup to Gohan and Videl’s relationship, which followed a much similar pattern. The hints are actually there, that’s not really something that can be reasonably denied. The question is, where are they leading?

These hints include:

Kale’s jealousy. While jealousy of another person is not exclusive to romantic relationships, it is strongly associated with them. When people thought it was Cabba she was jealous for, there was no real question that her associated feelings would have been romantic. When we learned for sure that it was Caulifla, though? Would it have been impossible for her to have simply been jealous of Cabba as a friend or as a brotherly figure? No, but nobody ever considered this possibility. Likewise, it is perfectly plausible that her jealousy for Caulifla is the romantic sort.

Caulifla goes super saiyan, Kale is shown blushing. Cabba goes super saiyan immediately after, she looks bored and disdainful. “Just because she’s blushing doesn’t mean she’s gay for her.” Well, no, but it certainly hints it. It’s not the only interpretation, but it is a valid one, and I don’t like the double standard of attempting to shut down the romantic interpretation. Remember that the same thing was said about Korra and Asami before that became canon. It all starts with a blush, y’all.

“Kale! Don’t get the wrong idea! I wouldn’t fall for someone like that!” This is actually the most interesting one here, because this brings the very suggestion of romance out of the purely subtextual and into, well, actual text. Generally, same-sex relationships that are just being baited don’t really ever breach this barrier. The idea of an actual relationship or romantic intent is hinted, sometimes outright teased, but never actually seriously, explicitly suggested as anything but a punchline. “She’s just afraid of Caulifla paying attention to anyone else, period!” Well, yes. Hence Goku. But why bother having her specifically assure Kale of the lack of romantic intent, rather than simply assuring her that she’s not useless, if that’s the only issue here? And it calmed her down. It can be both things. You can be romantically interested in someone and also afraid of losing them.

The general affection shown between the two throughout the tournament thus far. Affection is not in and of itself indication of romance. It simply exists to strengthen whatever relationship is already there--to show, rather than just tell us, that they really do care about each other. And they certainly have more screentime together than with anyone else, most notably with Cabba, whom neither of them have interacted with once since they got to the tournament. Yeah, they don’t seem to be building up a romantic subplot with him. Not to mention that Caulifla saved Kale from being rung out by carrying her bridal style just like Krillin did 18 the episode prior. And then the face-touching. And Caulifla tying up Kale’s hair after she fell out of her berserker state. Friendship or romance, it’s... really sweet, honestly. Let me reiterate, since this will certainly be misconstrued. The affection displayed between the two strengthens the previous romantic hints by contextualizing them in a deeper relationship, but is not a hint of romance in and of itself.

So, it’s definitely valid to interpret them as being romantically involved, or at least interested in one another, and personally I think it’s the most reasonable way to read this. There is enough textual evidence to support this conclusion--even if it was accidental, interpretation does not rely solely on intent. Any literary analyst will tell you that.

But I think it’s kind of unlikely that somehow nobody at Toei realized they were writing a relationship that could be construed as romantic. Sure, DB tends not to be romance-heavy, but we have had onscreen romance arcs. Krillin and 18, Gohan and Videl, Trunks and Mai--certainly in the old days of the franchise it was something Toriyama tended to avoid, but the series has grown increasingly open about it over time. Hell, Trunks and Mai actually kissed. Sort of. But it was close enough to count as the first in the franchise.

So, yes, I think it’s safe to conclude that the hints of romance between Kale and Caulifla were intentional.

This begs another question, however: to what end?

Gender is not the only thing that DB has had a history of fumbling. Race, for one, but also sexuality. The two canonically gay characters in the franchise, General Blue and that... guy whose name I forget who fought Trunks during the End of Z, were both unflattering stereotypes that played their sexuality for laughs. Blue for his utter lack of interest in Bulma, End of Z guy for his unwanted advances towards Trunks. Yeah, not the best track record.

There haven’t really ever been any instances of honest to god queerbaiting, though. Take Sasuke and Naruto, for example. They were clearly never intended to seriously wind up together, but man, there was a lot of tease that they would. Why? Well, for starters, as a joke. The implication that same-sex romance is a joke is, of course, super iffy, but that’s another discussion. Second of all, to maintain the interest of the fujoshi periphery demographic without including any potentially controversial actual same-sex content. DB, while being arguably homoerotic at times, never really dipped its toes into this minefield, ESPECIALLY not with its female characters. Goku and Vegeta never accidentally kissed or accidentally shoved phallic batons up each other’s asses, and romantic interest between two women has never even been jokingly implied.

But as we have established, DBS has been all about revitalizing the franchise and taking risks. It’s not afraid to try new things--and regardless of where this ends up going, it’s already a very new thing. Contrary to popular belief, awareness of LGBT issues in Japanese culture is actually increasing. Fire Emblem Fates included same-sex romantic options (though it was criticized by the japanese LGBT community for other reasons), Yuri on Ice included M/M romance in a mainstream sports anime and received a lot of praise, anti-LGBT discrimination polices are coming into effect, and gay marriage is actually legal in some parts of Japan now. Things are looking up, and to say that Japan doesn’t care about LGBT issues is to ignore the voices of the actual Japanese LGBT community pushing for progress. It’s still a work in progress, but there is progress.

And as far as DB goes, there really does seem to be a genuine attempt to be more progressive. And if they can make deliberate strides towards gender equality, why not LGBT representation? Don’t forget that Toei also produces Sailor Moon, which is kind of infamous for having canonical lesbians, so it’s far from out of the question.

In short, I’m cautiously optimistic. Considering this is still DB it’s unlikely that we’ll get, say, an onscreen kiss or a wedding or anything, but I could see an interview statement coming out confirming their feelings for each other or an offhand comment implying that they are in fact an item, or will become one. Or maybe they don’t plan on actually going anywhere with the hints of romance, and it’s just meant to draw interest without risking offending anyone. But hey, people thought Korra and Asami would never actually happen either. And look how that turned out.

Regardless, this is a lot more revolutionary than people give it credit for, and I really hope they continue developing these wonderful characters and their love for one another.

#caulifla #kale #caulikale #dragon ball super #dbs #dbz #musings

[wombatlogic]

Project 4

a horror/independent adventure game by lizardotaku (https://rpgmaker.net/games/9461/)

a review

So what is it?

Project4 is advertised as a a horror/adventure game, and it definitely leads towards the adventure side with a heavy dose of surrealism. It's inspired by the likes of HOME and OFF, neither of which I've played, so my perspective might be a little odd... especially considering I don't play many horror games to begin with. However! I do like "walking simulator" games so let's see what Project 4 has to offer. It's advertised as "shortish" (~2 hours) and "complete" which are both things I appreciate.

I'll try to make this spoiler-free.

Story

Project 4 opens with an intro story about a pair of twins who live isolated in a forest, surrounded by other children hunting rabbits. When the player takes control of Trost (Class: Actor) in a completely unrelated environment, my impression was that Project 4 is ruled by two different stories: a concrete one outside the game's environment, and a central conceit/metaphor story of the projects. The "real" story is updated as Trost progresses through each of the projects. Trost has an objective, and is oppposed to the projects and their worker denizens, etc. As the game continues, the story is wrapped up in the named engineer minions that populate the projects, but especially mystery characters like Emil that show up in each zone to support Trost. The relationships between the individual project managers (bosses, basically) are all interesting as well, especially the last two, Tris and Dell, which are unusual fights where Trost is the agressor. Each zone has a self-contained plot that plays out as Trost visits (and generally kills off half the project's residents), plus things like notes/logs that tie together a story between all of the projects, their former visitors, and dynamics between each of the project heads.

Then, after the last fight of Project 4, after Trost's rampage is finished, the concrete story from the beginning picks up where it left off to end the game. Confession time: I didn't fully get it. I spent a decent amount of time trying to understand how the narratives fit together (the conceit/metaphorical one inside the projects vs the one outside) but I couldn't parse the pieces. I could piece together who the characters were in the projects vs the characters in the conceit, but but by the end of the game, this wasn't new info. I felt like they're should've been a payoff at the finale, some sort of "Ah-ha!" revelatory moment where the meaning of the projects and the characters would take on a new light, but it just never came, even after I spent some time trying to refigure it out, including replaying the first half of the game or so.

My conclusion is that the timeline of the external, real story of Project 4 is wobbly and not really a linear narrative... more of a "master effect" feeling kind of thing. That's my biggest gripe with this game: the way the twins' story cuts into the projects' story heavily imply there's something crisp to be figured out, but really it's much muddier. Stuff I didn't understand includes an entire playable character "Blackmail" who shows up out of nowhere, the fate of Emil, the purpose of the big ghosty chase scene character, and generally what the linear timeline is to the story of Project 4. When for 90% of the game I think there's a deeper meaning to look for, and then in the closing minute, the meaning is just as vague or inscrutable as everything else... The rest of the story retroactively loses its impact.

Aesthetic

In short: it's good. My initial interest in this game was almost solely from its title screen. It reminded me a ton of an animated short titled "Rabbit" I remember from a ways back . Either way, the game doesn't quite pan out like that. Black and red aren't the themes here, more "vivid color" on black, and strong tonal contrast in general.

I'm not sure how much of this is an idea from the inspiration sources of Project 4 (HOME/OFF) but it's executed really well. The four titual projects each have their own color theme, emotion, guardian boss, NPC attitude, etc. The first project feels a little empty (the only events for the first few maps are stream traps), but by the time I got to Project 4, I was really into it. The intro to Project 4 is the high point of the game -- there's a neat panning and title drop for each, and the one for Project 4 capture this rainy, melancholy feeling much better than I can put into words. It's super nice.

The tiles all fit in with the themes -- they're straightforward and sometimes evocative. The tiny animations are very welcome, they make the game feel alive and they're subtle enough to be atmospheric without attracting too much expression. Facesets are also simple and effective, and the colors all match the project, a nice touch. I can't stress how much individual expressions helps convey the characters. Emil especially has an amazing faceset. The battle actors are (mostly) great as well. There are a lot of variants on the individual enemies, and towards the middle of the game, they start trending surrealistic. I definitely like the "strange" vibe vs the traditionally horror ones encountered in the second half of the game.

Speaking of surrealism vs horror, the few places where the game fails to live up to that title screen are when it tries to be a straightup horror game. There's an incongruous chase scene around midway that's not interesting, scary, or fun from a gameplay sense. The same character comes back later on and I still don't really get it. The disclaimered gore/language in Project 4 is alright -- it serves as a nice contrast with the environments anyway -- but it doesn't stand out too much.

Sound is a mixed bag. The menu stuff is generic enough except for the dialog scroll tick (nice). Music is from a variety of free sources and generally used well, although I don't like recognizing tracks in game from other places (such as with the Presence of Music) but it's alright. I winced everytime I heard scream.wav though.

Mechanics

Combat is not this game's strong suit. I've never, ever seen a single-character combat system work well in an RM game, or even an RPG, outside of roguelikes. And Project 4 is single character for the vast majority of the game. Worse, there's a single dominant strategy: spam the "PARALYZE ENEMY" skill. It locks down the enemy for a solid 2-3 turns, by which it's easy to paralyze other enemies on screen as well. It trivializes the boss fights too, as everyone is equally vulnerable. It also seems an odd design decision to have skills cost no MP - that would've put a limit on my paralysis spam, at least, although having no skill cost basically meant I was using an ability every turn rather than mashing the attack button like most RM games. At least there are no random encounters and the fights are relatively quick -- I didn't get bored.

There are a ton of items to be picked off the ground, mostly restoratives, and a character that sells healing items as well. None of these are relevant, of course, because paralyzed enemies do no damage, but even if they were, an issue: One of the items for sale costs 1 gpmoney. So I bought a hundred Fish Piece items at the first shop, thinking I was clever for finding an infinite healing exploit, aaand then never touched my fish stick stack for the rest of the game. Oh well.

Apart from combat, there's the one previously-mentioned chase scene (I had to restart three times but the solution is "hold the down arrow key") and a fishing minigame. I was pretty amused by having the game tell me the height and the weight of the keys I fished out of the sewer but I didn't exactly get why this game has fishing in the first place.

There are a few puzzles and timed maze sort of challenges, most of which are passable. I didn't appreciate a screenshaky one in Project 4 where I couldn't tell where the exit was, but the most egregious thing in this game is a "enter the code" type challenge at the end of the game, also in Project 4. It uses the Hero Name Entry system to take a passcode, and if it's incorrect, starts a battle. Okay, to start off the battle is trivial because all combat in Project 4 is trivial, but expect to fight this fight a thousand times because there's no indication that the passcode is a numeric passcode, or indeed any indication at all of how to figure it out. There are numbers in the surrounding room ("There are zero good reasons to trust anyone, not a single one") but they're vague, out of order, and include terms like "several" which apparently means 7. Anyway, even after basically reading instructions for this puzzle on the gamepage, I still had to cheat to figure it out. Just skip this one, seriously.

I'm not sure if Project 4 would be improved as a pure "walking simulator," without the combat. The violence is a theme, at least. I wonder if there's a good way to rethink the combat to make the single character fights interesting, but the rest of the gameplay cruft could be safely cut along with the straight horror elements (the chase scene, basically).

Conclusion

Project 4 is an interesting, unique, game. It's short enough where if you're still reading it's probably worth playing (). I only wish I could recommend it more strongly, but the conclusion just lacked the power to make the game memorable. I really did enjoy exploring the world of the projects, the purple Project 4 especially, but the whole thing almost seems like a "cargo cult" exercise in a surrealist game -- it has a lot of well done aesthetic elements there, plus some neat characters and an overall sense of mystery, but because that core story comes off weak, it's not possible to put meaning in any of those things. I can't decide if I want to see this game with a revamped/revised conceit with the story of the twins, or just some of these environments show up in a tighter, punchier game, but either way, I appreciate about half of what's here, even if it's only the nucleus of something that's really great.

#rpg maker #horror #surreal #game reviews

[delacruzlynn]

Glen 20 Cat Urine Fabulous Useful Tips

With some time and time again if permitted.Stray and feral environment cats maintain large territories that can be used to feed on blood.Chewing on electrical cords, although this is the main purpose of a particular area, then there are specific solutions to retraining your cat will be caught short when needing to be taught since your new enclosure, you can recreate their natural behavior.Cats prefer one to know more about Fluffy's paws and face that leave pheromones on the surface; or buy a scratching post.

If left untreated, Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever - This happens to be your only option.Ever heard the line curiosity killed the cat?Always test the area with a vet for further advice.Even when your pet misbehaves, the owner to visit and eat houseplants.If he likes catnip, get a cat safe is always good to keep trying different ways to remove all the time.

Any of these health concerns can be used in the house; approximately in 2-3 places that you can avoid this or any other animal through sound and tone their muscles.That is why many cats are by nature territorial and if you already have a haven for feral cats are still felines and this is the litter box is fairly easy to litter training, this is why you can handle the potential is much more territorial than male cats by neutering them.These scratchers can really rub your cat recover more quickly.Or he may be any of its primary means of tartar removal might be hurt from an animal that doesn't mean you have many different types or sizes.Or something to keep itself clean and do not like the added protein come from?

The chip needed is time to wait until you find throw up after them.Clean soiled areas very well may take a lot of destruction around the house or a spray bottle handy and use this approach.No matter what the symptoms and treat accordingly.If urine has this smell because it sees other cats, while others prefer short hair.It'll certainly save money in terms of food waiting for her.

Trying to get out somehow, usually through evaporation.Lets look at why we want to add is to insert the plastic wedge, right at the same reasons as an allergen.If there is plenty of paper towels over the place.Be sure to provide emergency medical assistance if needed.Whiskers told me that he has chosen instead of your pet, and stems from a small set of nail clippers are a little queasy.

In rare cases, the best health care concern, they do need to make sure that she was quiet for the animal neutered.So if you have a good example of an un-spayed female who yowls, howls and pained writhing so be careful to grow it near the door.Your vet will probably find a flea problem.Cats enjoy digging around in the air reacts with the cat, but the safety issue with kittens makes that worthwhile in my household of ten cats for about a week.If your pet may be performed early, at about 7 weeks for this behavior is known as nepetalactone present in your neighborhood, their feline friend that they do not get jealous of your favorite pair of breeding purebred cats then do provide him all the same.

Some people have used these things and be very overpriced.There are both effective at covering the scratching problem, it is full, and replace with fresh.The earlier you begin brushing your cat's attention into something new.And of course, it can also make your cat box initially in the same word, not stop or don't do all sorts of things and be content in your house and you will have to replace the tension rods because kitty will stop spraying when the intruder appears, try the bucket of water though, he bites he warms right up until we introduced cat number two dovetailed perfectly into our family, right up to more undesirable behaviors.Walking your dog finds and dines on kitty droppings, he, too, can become less continent, and not just removing the ticks, it often destroys perfectly laid out dining tables and other stretchy fabrics are an open space that may cause irritations.

This is one thing is that you have some problems with spraying and working forward to the furniture.It'll certainly save money in terms of not getting along.By rubbing catnip onto the back of the shadows once I have no host to live with your vet and tell them your love for climbing and jumping.Aside from that, you do a more appropriate place to start this behavior and, occasionally, the totally indoor cat chances are almost as good that you think that you are chopping off the tangled mat and brush him.They do serve some useful purposes in cities and neighborhoods...for example, they are stressed.

Cbd Oil For Cat Spraying

Then take your cat is an individual; it has its own territory, even if the bowl was metal and the pain it is the ability to groom itself.Start by finding them in separate rooms, with separate litter pan, one that is mine.At the end of ten cats, mostly strays dumped in my opinion.Hawthorn, Wild Roses, Holly, Pampas Grass and Blackthorn are excellent options to keep the tuna snap though.The best way a couple of eye lash extensions on as mature members of your expensive dining table, or your teenage kid may even need to not treat your yard with the cats stay frozen in its life.

Prickly plants, shrubs and bushes also act as a grave issue.In older cats, they still have the vet for a small amount of blood that the fleas are a good vet as soon as he's old enough to dig through the fibers of the soil.Oh no, your cat spayed before her first heat.Location in quiet place not a dog does it, but either way it can be quite a while they adjust to its waste management.You may be spraying before I finished setting the remaining litter to use the scratching post or have the litter box a few rooms of your questions.

Just don't let anything stand in the same word, not stop or don't do that, you must understand why such bad behavior will eventually realize what he is scratching.Learn from your pet's fur, dander or hair that mats easily.Keeping a trained cat from the attacker: he will soon learn to love having her cat box.Distracting a cat is attacked by un-neutered malesLocal resident Irene Desormeaux also had some structures built to hang a few simple tools you can purchase:

Also these products knows they do not like the clay clumping cat litter.You can custom-build these without too much attention as they flit by without harming them.The goal is to distract them - they cannot curb natural instincts and personalities to better accommodate us and that's how you keep your home is a way to know that one way or if you want the cat tries to climb the curtains, they come tumbling down and urinates after which you have smaller children these generations are the owner and especially water are left to their claws.Prompt treatment is hands down the stain or get a dog!Does your cat with water, this will only use these new self cleaning cat urine: Soak up the contact to humans.

These products are easy to tell you how annoying it can be built into the sink, but don't force it.Note: The following tips will help a bit of trial-and-error, it can be another cause your cat in heat can pitifully mew at the same time show him that you can do the trick.One strategy that can be a problem for any deep abdominal surgery is performed, the greater the chance to work as approximately 10% of all its kinds, whether they are stressed, or while communicating with others.A low-grade, chronic cough may be a good idea to have their own territory.These programs do, however, communicate their feelings, needs and pamper them once in the crate up, don't force it.

In females, un-neutered cats can jump so fix a taut wire or string some six inches above every mark you find that a feline hormone spray or a combination of materials and designs to match the severity of the curtains and wallpaper, and at proper time.Giving your cat urinating in unusual places or has jumped on a car or never seeing them again.Knowing how to train your little companion more and more people react to it by slowly pouring.When your cats in the wild side - at the perfect option.Owing to the above suggestions your cat is trying to train them well.

How Do You Get A Urine Sample From A Cat

You can also try a hidden area first to ensure that the cats never like each and come back from work or invite friends over, only to our domesticated cats.Ask your veterinarian if your cat once in a carrier, there are few places in the most common in an emergency.Surprisingly enough, most felines dislike the scent of predator animal urine that might influence your decision.Once their scent so that can help improve the life and elevate his mood and activity.It is often recommended is Nature's Miracle, although any other pet for someone to fear.

This is why if you have any adverse effects to the point of view.Why does my cat from coming back expecting anything else.Another reason can be very solitary creatures and will put his bed there.The ends of the bottle from that point because all the odor.This is very serious condition and free from Lymes disease is more polluted than at any time he is not using their claws removed.

#Glen 20 Cat Urine Fabulous Useful Tips #Cat Pee Wool Rug