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wen-kexing-apologist · 4 months

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Random BL Superlatives: 2023

Well @lurkingshan did it, so I must do it. So here are some random, WKA themed superlatives for the 2023 BL selection.

Best Hands: Mhok and Day, Last Twilight

gif by @singularities

Listen. I know. I KNOW. There are so many incredible options, and I have written at length about a number of them. I mean come on, La Pluie is right there, I Feel You Linger in the Air is right there, Sing My Crush, Moonlight Chicken etc. etc. etc. But

But, Last Twilight came in with the steel chair right at the end of the year here with that FUCKING HANDSING SCENE. Can you blame me? The handsing scene is shrimply too powerful.

Best Lighting: Playboyy

You know, it's funny cause I don't usually end up writing about lighting in shows, despite the fact that lighting design is absolutely one of my favorite things in film, stage, and television. Chains of Heart has really interesting lighting too, but Playboyy is an objectively better show, and it is doing some absolutely gorgeous lighting design.

Best Sex Scene: Olive Oil, I Feel You Linger in the Air

gif by @pharawee

THE OLIVE OIL SCENE, WHY ARE THERE NO GIFSETS OF THE OLIVE OIL SCENE? WHY IS TUMBLR SUCH A FUCKING HATER???? They didn't even fuck in that scene, but holy mother of GOD it was the best thing I've seen all year. I Feel You Linger in the Air has some of the most inventive and beautiful intimate moments, and spreading the olive oil as a stand in for arousal and masturbation was absolutely goddamn brilliant.

Best Faen (Non)Fatale: Porjai, Last Twilight

gif from @khaopybara

I know Last Twilight hasn't finished yet and will take us in to 2024, but Porjai and Mohk's relationship is absolutely my favorite lovers to friends dynamic I have seen this year. I was showering praise upon them all for this in the tags of a reblog today, so I have to give it to them. Massive shout out and extremely close call to Nara from La Pluie.

Best Emotional Roller Coaster: What Did You Eat Yesterday? Season 2

Ok there were quite a lot of shows that I think would have applied here, but man oh man this entire season has just run me through the wringer with how much Shiro has grown over the course of the last two seasons. Episode 11 had me laughing my ass off, and then absolutely sobbing by the end. So it's going to Kinou Nani Tabeta?

The Shirt I Want to Steal Most from Wardrobe: Blue and White Button Up, The Sign

gif from @ohshinytrinketsmine

I know this will be contentious when the Fart Proudly shirt is right there, but I really loved the blue and white button up shirt that Phaya wore I do not know what is in the water at IdolFactory, but they have hands down some of the best shirts I have ever seen. When I watched Secret Crush on You I wanted the entirety of Sky's wardrobe, now I am having shirt envy for this sexy little blue-with-white-lines-that-are-vaguely-rabbit-shaped (wka do not write a post about rabbits, do not write a post about rabbits-) button up.

The Character Who Most Changed my Opinion of Them: Phupa, OS2 x BBS x ATOTS

gif by @alexshenry (double PhupaPat whammy for @waitmyturtles)

Okay, so to tell you the truth, I made new superlatives cause if I took the superlatives from @lurkingshan's post it would have been at least half the same if not more (because as always, Shan is right about everything). But, I will put an overlap here because I absolutely could not let this year go by without applauding Aof, Earth, and Phupa for really putting in the work to help me understand this man better.

The Show That Most Surprised Me: Wedding Plan by MAME

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Okay not only was this show that I absolutely was not planning to watch or initially interested in actually one of the best of the year, but it was also a MAME show. And a lot of us have our critiques of MAME's writing, but this was so outside of her typical MO that I am shocked it came from the same writer. Love Sailom, love a Lavender Wedding, love Nuea, love it all.

The Trope This Year That Most Accounted for the Fact These Are Gay MEN: Boxing! Sing My Crush, Wedding Plan, The Sign

Sing My Crush did this the absolute best, but I really genuinely loved that multiple shows this year let men fight in controlled settings to get out some of their frustration and to process their feelings. Han Ba Ram crying in the gym? One of my favorite scenes of the entire year.

And yeah sure, Phaya and Tharn are fighting for the intricate rituals that allow men to touch the skin of men, we get the horny vibes, but fundamentally this fight does occur because Tharn is angsty and ignoring Phaya and that cannot stand. I like seeing Phaya sparring with the punching bag at the end of the most recent episode as well because he's fucking furious about Tharn telling the doctor about his dreams. I love it, I love it so much.

#bl superlatives #last twilight the series #playboyy the series #i feel you linger in the air #what did you eat yesterday?#kinou nani tabeta?#the sign the series #our skyy 2 x bbs x atots #a tale of a thousand stars #sing my crush the series

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mecachrome · 13 days

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omg k i just saw ur top 3 landoscar moments post from october 2023... any changes/updates since then? new moments made it onto the list? or if not... favorite moment of 2024 so far? (i just like hearing (reading?) ur thoughts it's like reading an intellectual (but still sappy in my fave way) bedtime story 🥰)

hklsdfhlsfhd naurrr... this is so embarrassing why am i still deeply landoscarpilled 6 months later 😔

but honestly i have been thinking about this and the sheer volume of crasyinsane material and lore we've accrued since last year because now i'm like how would you even begin constructing a top 3....... the possibilities are endless!!!

in terms of pre-october content that i might have missed before, i'd say most of this ask still holds (lando's biggest fan dot mp4 will NEVER lose its insanity to me. quintessential landoscar meta as far as i'm concerned) but now i also desperately need 2 shout out portrait painting challenge...... when it came out i was of course susceptible to the "you look beautiful" bantz though mostly just wrote it off as shipbait and since then i've looked back on this video multiple times and been like ?! why was oscar's deference to lando so insane actually.... i've alr mentioned this b4 but 1) oscar taking lando's intro in stride and immediately responding i am ready lando norris 2) oscar playfully acquiescing and letting lando use purple after he'd already chosen it 3) >like 5 seconds later. "you like purple don't you?" "uhhhh... i can do now" (who says that.) 4) another stunning display of lando Nooticing and fixating on oscar's hair swoop and last but not least 5) the way oscar FOLDS OVER and giggles helplessly when lando tells him i've just done you all pink ??? like. OKAY. cheers

looking @ recent content..... personally i find 814 so fascinating because while there are many Discrete Moments i can point out that make my brain explode i also feel like to some degree the reason we (? or maybe just me. again i apologize for the nonsensical drivel i create) love to make parallel gifsets of them is because they have such an understated dynamic built off many minute unspoken habits and wordless exchanges and essentially Patterns so there is less of like... a need for spontaneous intimacy.... if that makes sense. it's about the consistency of reciprocal comfort... iterations..... palisades palisades......... ok this is totally not related to the ask i've just been rotating it in my mind

anyway 10 personable favs !!! arranged chronologically

finish the lyrics (oct 2023): a deeply obvious one but you can't Not include it 😩 i can't believe this came out a week after i answered that because seriously what da hell. @ OSCAR PIASTRI WHAT IS WRONG WITH YEWWWWWWWW. there are sooooo many things i could mention here that i feel have already been exhaustively expounded, the most obvious of course being the classic ojp Heart Eyes moment(s) (Many such cases......but also specifically the love story one) (like i'd argue silverstone was mostly responsible for getting 814 off the ground BUT this video was when their dynamic became the most "mainstream" and accessible to fandom as a whole... the amount of non-f1 fans i saw qrting reups of that clip!!!!) anyway but then you also get 👉 whatever the inside joke they have about old town road is. oscar saying "i reckon you'd be unreal in a karaoke bar in japan" which i still think is such a Line... just me ??? the way he verryryryyyy softly sings "yes" with lando at the end of their love story karaoke and the insane camera angle of him just out of focus. like. really in general there is just such a soft and lighthearted and Fun air to their dynamic in this video that makes me ;__; AND this is another prime moment of lando narrating oscar's firsts for him (singing on camera at mcl!!!) . ALSAURR lando tapping oscar on the bicep while sarcastically complimenting him. once again for two guys who never touch it compels me... actually i could go on about this video tbh like how oscar nearly falls off the couch giggling at lando playing the songs together and then it cuts to the next one and he's suddenly all flushed and his bangs have gotten all fucked up. he's so... they're so... let's move on.

splunk sim city challenge (nov 2023): many classic lines such as "i haven't even distracted you yet!" + oscar knowing his podium year and lando saying "you're a nerd!" + lando going ":) :o are you okay?" and so on... general setup of this challenge was crasy tbh. how it revolves around disrupting the other person's focus and the visual asymmetry of one being sat higher and having to lean over to distract them and how oscar just giggles goodnaturedly when lando sticks his cue cards in front of his face instead of getting annoyed and—SO ON. also forever obsessed with how oscar wordlessly lifts his eyebrows at lando at the end lol

that one sticker video (nov 2023): this video is insaaAAANEEEE to me. ANYONE ELSE??? first of all oscar and lando gingerly standing across each other on either side of the flower bed (while zak brown assumes a power stance directly on it lmfao) is already so visually overwhelming but then the way oscar glances up as he's removing the sticker from the cap, how you can seeeeee him calculating the move the entire time and being adorably pleased about it, @__@ the way lando grins at him afterward... (also crying at zb glancing at them and being equally charmed by their antics) wahhh TT__TT the vibes of this clip... immaculate

oscar thanking lando in their final post-race message (nov 2023): honestly the entire message in general but :__) one of my fav 814 moments OAT is oscar including lando in his thank you speech and lando not really expecting it and being genuinely touched by the gesture. lando is so endearingly fidgety the entire time honestly and the way he perks up a bit and wrings his hands together and playfully smiles at oscar when he mentions him... okayyy. anyway 2 me it's reminiscent of yes/no challenge "am i the funniest teammate you've ever had?" "(shyly) yeahhh... you're up there" (said in the same baby-ish voice as "so... lando?" UGH. UGHHHH) and how lando genuinely gets a bit awkwardly flustered by it like!!! god. wait ALSO i don't have the space for this so i'm throwing in end of season awards MMMM debatable + how gleefully lando threw oscar under the bus and in general just the incredible expression work going on for both of them during this exchange. God [2]

si rapid fire questions (dec 2023): this video was crucial in determining that oscar... well. is obsessed with accommodating and mirroring lando. many things we already knew (aka listening to whatever music lando listens to; insert prema lap "maybe i should move to an english team because the music's better" moment here) but equally important is oscar "stealing" lando's dinner, how lando presses him on the back to the future question until oscar just changes his answer to his, and of course as you know per my blog title NO I'M GOING TO KEEP YOU HAPPY is in my eyes top 5 most insane things oscar piastri has ever said. likeee... lando showing a bit of jokey remorse over enforcing his rules (don't even get me started about lando and game/challenge rules...) but oscar being sooo determined 2 honor his teasing 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 :melting_face: x100!!!

need to split this into two lists because apparently there's a div character limit 😔 continuing on

hilton spa ad (feb 2024): of course this pained me because of This Moment (specifically lando bringing his hand back down when oscar tried to lift it from beneath him 😮‍💨) but that is neither here nor there. obsessed with the salmon at the engineering table anecdote because the most logical explanation for oscar Not doing that anymore is because lando didn't like it... or he just eats different things now but we already know that he's adopted lando's preferred meal b4 so that's equally a lot 2 digest !!! also >the callback to their one million LOOK AT YOU/HIM moments >how they touch shoulders exactly Once when they sit down and then never again despite lando continuously leaning into oscar's space to get to the button... eugh. also just top tier oscar faces + hair 🥰

opening title behind the scenes (mar 2024): thinking about all the hilarious gifsets of this moment that i ate up deliciously 🧡🧡🧡 this was such a significant reminder of how 814 have just gotten like, exceedingly comfortable around each other & have learned 2 communicate via the most inscrutable expressions and noises and gestures that somehow suit Them perfectly x__x although i doubt they will ever really become ~effusive~ with each it's frankly even more devastating that they both help each other care less about maintaining appearances / how they often get so sucked into their interactions (see next bullet point) that everything else kind of just fades away in that instant.... all right ⚠️⚠️⚠️ maybe that's a bit of a stretch but we can pretend for the rpf lens!!! see also my tag spiel in this beautiful tuva gifset.

photo day antics (mar 2024): do you ever just...... what went on in bahrain. honestly. more from this weekend in a second but this video plus the accompanying photo encapsulate their dynamic so perfectly it makes me scream... how 814 are not only so annoyingly focused on each other all the time but also stand SOOO UNNECESSARILY CLOSE while every other teammate pairing is spaced out normally. yuki and checo glancing at them alksfdhdf 😭 truly so ridiculous that the poor photo person tried to get lando's attention and they pretended to comply for two seconds before oscar was lifting his foot to show lando his boot again. also why did it take oscar a million years to step away from lando and put a more appropriate amount of space between them...?! and even then it was barely that much........... (10 paragraphs of speaking later) I prefer really not to speak.

accidental waist grab (mar 2024): this gave me psychic damage so bad i should be lobotomized. we've already spoken about this perhaps erm excessively but why did lando feel the need to stand JUST as close to him if not closer after they broke apart. there was truly no need...... honestly the way this ship will have us looking up driver cams and staring at esteban ocon's ass as he gets out his car just for a single glimpse of their parc fermé dynamic.

bahrain post-race interview antics (mar 2024): You already knowwwww. the sky sports "he follows me everywhere" moment is equally important but the f1tv interview giving us horrifically natural banter (juxtaposing this with their previous interview moments...), lando's dumb faux australian accent and oscar playing along as always, and most of all them HIJACKING THE INTERVIEW & commiserating on camera together ❓❗️ lichrally the grid photo all over again. often when i have emotions over an 814 moment i worry that i sound overly He_Only_Got_Two_Eyes.jpeg but truly sometimes two people are just objectively insane. plus land of piastri/lando piastri.....

also runner up is the f1tv interview with lawrence aka lando's cooing noise @ oscar discussing lily (anyone else frame by frame color pick oscar's face to see how badly he flushed... no? just me?) + the beautiful self-aware surfacing of the CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATIONS of their relationship...... !!! love when 2 guys expose and confirm their own sincerity in trying to verbally resist it. hem

is this anything. sorry eve LKSFDHLDHSF thank u for the ask & pls lmk what ur fav moments are too 🧡

#ask #i need to stop answering asks like this. sorry

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desidarling123 · 8 months

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SAB Scene Breakdown: Inej's Hallucination

OK, so I had actually been meaning to write and publish some meta on this particular scene (and just tons of SAB S2 meta, in general) in the weeks after the second season of the show came out. But life has been crazy recently, so I truly never found the time.

However, I reblogged a certain gifset a few days/weeks ago, slapped some tags on it, and realized there might indeed be some interest in some more #detailed thoughts.

The analysis that follows is at a pretty minute level of detail (and all of course based on MY views) so... take that with a grain of salt.

Also - fair warning - it's long as hell 😂 but entertaining, I hope!

I find this whole sequence in general super fascinating - it's one of my favorite scenes in the second season, and one that's also arguably subject to the absolute worst takes in fandom (iykyk... and if you don't, well, you're about to find out.)

So, let's get into it:

We start off strong with a very specific choice, made early on: it's not Inej seducing Kaz; rather, it's Kaz who's drawing Inej into this vision.

I get a bit more into the broader implications of that a bit later, but it's definitely important that it's done this way, rather than the other way around.

It's also, very notably, an inverse of this scene from a few episodes earlier:

What's unique about that previous scene is that in that moment, he's deliberately pushing her away (for reasons, mind you, that she's not entirely privy to, but definitely hurt her regardless - even if she pretends not to care about it to his face later on).

This is different. Instead of pushing her away, he is asking her to stay.

The choice of words is specific too: the word 'disappear' most obviously references her status as his spider. But it might also be an apt description of her own personal trappings, of 'disappearing' when in the throes of trauma-induced pressure.

Some atmospheric details I love:

Their IRL confrontation was in his office-cum-bedroom (👀shutup), a tiny, crammed space that matched the tension of that scene. This is the opposite of that - the room has a more open layout, imbuing the whole sequence with a more relaxed vibe. We can even see his cane chilling on the table behind him, just in reaching distance.

The DeKappel painting which they jointly stole in the books (and presumably on the show as well) is behind them.

Fire burning as a symbol for latent passion is not exactly groundbreaking imagery, but don't fix what ain't broke, amirite? :P

Malina, very notably, gets the same fire imagery treatment in their own love scene as well:

Will it show up again in a future season for kanej? Between that and, well, the recurring church imagery, we're in for a tossup, folks

But anyways. Back to the scene at hand.

You'll notice Inej goes back to a formal stance, hands behind her back, like she's preparing for a debrief or for an assignment. It's for a few seconds, if that, but it shows that she's grasping at some semblance of normalcy in this decidedly not-normal vision.

That facade lasts for all of, two seconds, tops, when he does this:

It's sexy! It's intimate! There's knives involved!

Okay, but seriously, for the sake of time I actually will not get into a deeper discussion of the ~implications~ because I'm sure it's been done a zilllion times before and it's also fairly obvious lol

Now, the one thing I *do* want to pivot to here is that by this point, both Inej and the audience understand that there is something very subtly yet fundamentally different about hallucination!Kaz.

But what is it?

Speaking on this scene, Freddy Carter had a quote (that I cannot be arsed to find rn) where he basically said that he deferred to Amita when playing hallucination!Kaz because "she (Amita) knows better (than I do) what it is that Inej likes about Kaz"

And what is it, exactly, that she likes about him? The next few gifs tell all, using actions rather than words.

This is her reaction to him pulling her knives from her. And what I find so interesting is that she is so (rightfully) startled....

But that is absolutely NOT the expression on his face at all.

In fact, he's remarkably self-assured.

And THAT, I think, is the crux of 'what it is she likes about him', as Frreddy said.

She likes his decisiveness, the single-minded precision with which he operates.

She's seen him apply it to every last scheme, every seemingly-hopeless situation... to damn near everything in the world, really, but her.

But here, in the depths of her hallucination, he does.

There are none of his usual hangups, none of their typically frustrating back-and-forths.

No. Here, he doesn't hesitate. He wants her, and he makes it known.

Striking, sexy stuff, to say least.

Let's go on:

Nothing to add here except that I'm obsessed with the way their heads turn at the same time here.

It's funny, because for all their personal hang-ups when it comes to physical intimacy, these two are SURPRISINGLY physically attuned to each other.

Goes to show, really, how much both of their problems are in their heads (obviously) -- and how, when they're actually ready to heal, relying on their intuition may be a better approach than getting too cerebral about it.

Again, Kaz does not break eye contact with her here, and it's such a contrast to what he might have instead done if this were happening in real life - in fact, does happen, in real life, though I'd argue that isn't exactly his fault.

I love that we get a moment where Inej looks down and sees his hand hovering near her waist, just so that it's made explicitly clear what he's asking for and what the ~implications~ are.

And then, she says yes! Enthusiastically, I might add.

Not but seriously the sheer want, the little touch of eagerness on her face kills me here. She's never had this experience before - has only ever known men violating her in the most horrible way possible - and yet this tiny little thing, of Kaz asking her for consent, means so much.

Oh my God Kaz is so sexy here sorry no words anyway carrying on.

Now even after she said yes you can see this sudden little beat of hesitation on her face, like she's maybe not sure what's going to happen or if Kaz is going to do what she asked. For her it's a moment of incredible vulnerability, even though Kaz is the one sort of making the advances on her - because this one time, she actually gets to say yes.

I think that shot of his arm going around her waist is so gorgeous and so sensual - but as we pan up we can see that maybe all isn't well.

Now, Amita also really does a fantastic job at portraying the turbulence of Inej's emotions -- she goes from clearly wanting it and saying 'yes', to visibly panicking once he acts on it. We see her shift around in his grip and even swallow nervously, blink-blink-blinking herself back into the moment.

Her response is reminiscent of this passage from the books:

But what might have happened if he'd spoken that night? If he had willingly offered her some part of his heart? What if he had come to her, laid his gloves aside, drawn her to him, kissed her mouth? Would she have pulled him closer, kissed him back? Could she have been herself in such a moment, or would she have broken apart and vanished, a doll in his arms, a girl who could never quite be whole?

You can see the very beginning of that sort of panic start to set in, here. This is completely uncharted territory for Inej - her own desire, the shame and baggage that comes with it, is all getting uncovered for the first time in what is arguably the 'safest' way possible - within the confines of her own mind - and yet, she's still panicking.

More on that in a bit. Let's keep going.

Anyways well Freddy's got a huge hand sorry anyway

I love the way she closes her eyes here. And you can see again it's not without effort - like there's still conflict within her, you can see all of those different emotions warring within her - but she is trying to let herself have this moment. She's trying to take comfort in this touch that she so desperately wants and yet hasn't had any sort of good connotations with in recent history.

She also opens her eyes just as he starts to lean in and I think that was a great, deliberate choice on Amita and Freddy's part.

It's that precise moment, really, when it becomes super super clear to her what's about to happen.

No notes, I just really love this forehead lean, it's that little bit of tenderness and intimacy that she's been subconsciously craving.

Again, it's fascinating to me that we can see all of Inej's nervous tics coming into play here, but for hallucination!Kaz there's absolutely no hesitation at any point whatsoever.

It looks like, for all intents and purposes, he is going to kiss her.

And then at the very very last second you see him move back, ever-so-slightly --

and then she moves all the way back and delivers her line:

Ouch. Like a punch to the gut. True, but still ouch.

Now one could probably ask, in hypotheticals: why didn't he actually kiss her at this moment? And the answer to that simply is: this is her hallucination, you know? Even though she's not conscious of it (she's dying lol), she's the one with all the power, here.

And truthfully, whether she knows it or not, nothing is going to happen in her hallucination if she doesn't want it to.

But wait, you might say. Doesn't she want to kiss Kaz?

Like that original excerpt from the book indicates, it's complicated. Everything pertaining to desire generally will be, for her.

Not that her subconscious doesn't put up a good ol' fight. Hallucination!Kaz, you have to remember, isn't so much Kaz as he is a very precise amalgamation of her own memories and desires.

And boy, does he make a good argument:

The word want, again, spoken so directly here - it's that sort of straightforward speech that neither party is actually really capable of (at this point) in their arcs, not when it comes to each other.

Again, Kaz is behaving perfectly in the prescribed character of his hallucination persona - direct, confident, not rattled in the slightest.

It's interesting also that he doesn't say: this is real. He isn't able to lie to her in her own fantasy, but he does instead tell her exactly what she wants to hear, which is arguably even more dangerous.

And what I feel so terrible about is you can see this tiny little spark this little bit of hope on her face that she has.

She wants to believe this so so badly. She wants it, damn it!

So this time, she actually moves closer, crosses that distance between them.

You can't see it super well in this gif, but you can see a little tiny muscle twitch in her jaw, a nervous swallow as she's bracing for him to kiss her the second time. And once again, Kaz isn't hesitating, there isn't any note of that discordant thing that they have in real life from his end.

Now another thing that drives me crazy is people claiming that they did kiss in the scene like bro. Bro. Freddy and Amita did not shoot this scene at no less three separate angles for you to tell us that they kissed!! They didn't kiss, they make it incredibly obvious that they did not kiss, and if you're the one person on planet Earth whose definition of a kiss is front lips brushing for .0000000002 seconds then I'm sorry, you belong to a different category, okay?

And again, that was on purpose! It totally would have defeated the purpose of this particular sequence if they had (and would've given detractors of this scene a real leg to stand on - again, more on that at the very end.)

But as it stands, they don't kiss, and that's also kind of critically why this isn't just a sexy scene to watch back.

AND THEN (I'm out of allowed images HAHA) she pulls away. And she says the words that end it all - This isn't real. This is the poison.

The premise of the hallucination is completely shattered, and she looks so heartbroken, but she's finally able to articulate what she's really known this whole time, and that is that nothing she's seeing is real. It is a lie being fed to her by her poison-addled brain as her body slowly succumbs and dies (dark).

But you know, she does get out of it through sheer willpower, and we love her for that - but oh man but what cost?

This particular sequence is definitely a catalyst for her changed behavior going forward. I do actually wish it had been a little better handled in the show (as in, better supported by dialogue in scenes before and after this one) but regardless - this scene is a Big Tipping Point and starts what is essentially a pseudo-regression arc for Inej (paraphrasing Amita directly, bc that's truly the most apt description of Inej's behavior for the rest of the season.)

It's really bad timing, unfortunately, because it happens just as Kaz is starting to open up like never before. He's starting to see the world in a completely different light while she's doing the exact opposite -- she is shutting down her own dreams and desires when it comes to him, because she's come to the conclusion that it's simply not going to happen.

And you know what, she's not entirely wrong for that assumption, but I do have beef with some of the particulars of how it was executed in the show. But that's a discussion for another day.

Now, onto a brief rant that I alluded to at the very start of this post - my single biggest grievance with fandom is that someone on the internet decided that this scene somehow ‘erased’ Inej’s trauma, when in fact that exact trauma is what underpins the whole damn thing.

The fact that this scene more or less parallels the passage from the books beat for beat, shows, in my opinion, that book fans who make these claims of 'erasure' must have deliberately chosen to ignore this passage from the books, or never even read it in the first place.

Because frankly? Once you take that passage into consideration, the intent of this sequence couldn't have been more obvious!

Just to underscore my point, I want to ask anyone who's reading this to please compare and contrast Inej’s hallucination with Matthias’ dream. If the intent, as many so often like to claim, was simply to make this moment in Inej’s mind a sexy, titillating scene, well then, it would have been shot a lot more closely to the way Matthias’ dream was shot: there's no lack of kissing and even implied penetration (!) which is crazy, because of course, Matthias and Nina have gotten nowhere near that in real life.

There's a sexual aspect to her dream, for sure, but it's not a stereotypically-passionate 'sex dream' so much as it is a thinly-veiled reading into her own desires and the inner turmoil that comes with it.

There's also a very subtle undercurrent here that I picked up on and explore in my ongoing fic , which is that Kaz, in these fantasies, is really always the one taking the lead, so to speak. Inej is not pulling him close or asking to kiss him - and we see that even when she consents to the act, she looks like she's bracing herself for it, rather than excited that it'll happen.

That is fueled no doubt by 1) her realizing it isn't real but also 2) the fact that she is still very much in the middle of her own trauma (having been freed like what? mere days ago? if that?)

Any concept of her own independent desire is still saddled with IMMENSE baggage - and this sequence showcases it perfectly.

I think after the fact, she's consciously aware of 1) but not yet aware of 2) which is beating around in her subconscious and is probably gonna cause her WAYY more problems going forward lol

TLDR; Inej doesn't know it just yet, but she's got loads of her own issues to work through, and until she does, she's going to be stuck in this weird purgatory of being a voyeur to/of her own desires.

#kanej #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #sab #shadow and bone #my meta

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