#on what’s supposed to be my redacted blog lol

[neptuniadoesstuff]

My Reference Sheet of Phen 228.

A "censored" Ref of my ver of Phen 228 (Canon) for my Modern AU aka "Branches of a Paranormal Federation".

(What is censored are the faces & the severed limb as those are where the gøřə is.)

Bio (Major):

|| Code Name: Phen 228 | Aliases: "Watanabe Bird", "The Boiled One", Hakunata (Based on strange written letters that look similar to English) | Year & Place of Discovery: 2003, Pennsylvania (By the Ephrata Branch) | Current Wearibouts: Unknown | Other: Was discovered to have other variants of it whom have somewhat similar abilities although with different out comes | Main abilities: Cognito-Hazardous properties (When looked at, can cause quesdocoma & the manifestation of its being, can't be seen by others, only ones who are effected) | Ways to combat the effects: Wear blue-light glasses & earplugs, must be about 5 feet away from the screen at all cause ||

(Btw this is just info the Ephrata Branch has put down, as I'll be putting my own info here based on my head canons & the design/lore I gave Phen myself for this au. Although the Hakunata part is only for this AU & not the canon lore. This includes the design.)

(WARNING INCOMING! BL00D, GUTS, & GØŘƏ WILL BE HERE, PROCEED WITH CAUTION! FOR THESE ARE THE UNCENSORED REFS + FULL BODY REFS OF PHEN 228!)

(Also... Slight disturbing imagery for the reference photo)

The actual uncensored ref sheet & the full body ref. Yeh uh.. they look pretty messed up lookin but it's clear that Phen rlly isn't supposed to look.. Clean.. (Although I am waiting till the simps arrive.. Which I hope they don't-)

Bio (Written by... an outsider aka me lol)

|| Name: [REDACTED] | Aliases: Hakunata (A nickname given to by his sister) | Gender: Interseggs/Genderless (But is represented as male), He/They/It (Or any Pronouns but those are preferred) | Age: 100? (Not sure, I doubt Phen has a canon age-) | Height: Whatever rlly (But is normally like... REALLY TALL-) | Pride: No Idea. I doubt this spirit demon thing cares about being attracted to anything- | Species: A strange hybrid of a human & fallen angel | Family: A child named "Rei" & some other Phens (Example: Kasinoshi or "Priest) | Personality: Somewhat malicious, is a bit obsessive with a certain family, but seems to... weirdly care about his victims? (Idk its a whole bag of worms) | Occupation: Some false prophet frikker idk. Might've been a war criminal from Japan in a past life (WWII) | Powers: Able to give anyone who looks at it w/o protection pseudocoma & sleep paralysis, also able to communicate with anyone who is affected with their "curse". Can fly apparently (But is pretty lazy & doesn't rlly use their phantom arms to fly at all) | Other (aka unimportant stuff): Prob likes torturing a certain family he effected back in 2003, despises kids (except its own), gets very uncomfortable with anything sus (like me), loves stealing & consuming ppl's spines, prob not understanding how modern tech work, might commit a few war crimes here & there (which is a big nono), & is usually seen indulging himself in some Japanese things bcs it reminds him of the old times (Yes even the modern stuff) ||

& here is the Original/Reference Image!

(Update: fix some stuff in the Extra info thing bcs I don't grammar well.)

Credits lol-

Character: Phen 228 (Belongs to Doctor Nowhere aka Silas) (Although the design of Phen 228 not from the original image belongs to me.)

Art: Mine.

Reference Image Creator: Silas Orion aka Doctor Nowhere.

Program: IbisPaint x.

Bubs' TOS: Plz don't repost/steal, trace, or recolor my art WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! If you do, I'll take yur femur and pelvis.. SO, DON'T THINK ABOUT IT! (The PNS on my blog's pinned post clearly means "Please No Steal" plz follow that rule.) If you do post my art on anything like yur blog or somewhere else (With my permission) PLEASE CREDIT ME!

#neptuniadoesstuff #n-verse #art #au #reference sheet #ref #phen 228 #the boiled one phenomenon #BoaPF #Branches of a Paranormal Federation #doctor nowhere #hakunata #au design #fallen angel #Demon #Here he comes to eet yur spine >:)

[running-tweezers]

Damien with the Road Trip Google Doc

#redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted spoilers #redacted damien #I am Damien #I have my moms ‘designated trip planner’ gene #i have to be prepared #also #seems like forever since I live posted a stupid redacted joke #on what’s supposed to be my redacted blog lol #it’s called healing sweaty

[shepherds-of-haven]

Do you ever go back through your story just randomly changing things that you didn't like or didn't really fit in with the story at time?

Oh, absolutely! I consider the entire alpha build a first draft, so I definitely go back and change things as I see fit (recently taking out fairmath is a good example, but I also quietly go back and heavily edit/rewrite/revamp scenes between characters all the time); I also think that, as the years of development have gone on, some worldbuilding facts or lore or spoilers about future plot threads I've mentioned no longer apply to the game in its current state (I recently changed the whole calendar system so that a month is 63 days instead of 42, for example; or I'll read an old post about a character's thoughts on marriage and think 'oh that's definitely not right anymore'; or something of the sort). So if you read any obscure lore posts prior to, like, 2020 on this blog, they have maybe a 50% of being completely accurate, haha. There was even a point where I said that Norms have gold-tinted skin that kind of glints in the light (not like the vampires in Twilight, thank you), which I have since once again mentally retracted, lol. So no one should take things I said in the past as 100% gospel, is my point!

More than going back through what I've already written and changing things, though, I tend to heavily change things from my planned/outlined version as I'm writing it, not after. In my outline version of ShoH, Mimir was supposed to show up in Lavinet's chapter as an advocate for the Elementals, and Chapter 7 involved getting trapped in a small farming community in a snowstorm and, um, somehow Wintry would have been recruited as a companion or something (I don't really remember) but I definitely know the Changelings and Thurl weren't involved. By the time I got to Chapter 6, though, I threw those plans right out because they just didn't feel right and just sort of improvised as I went along! I tend to do that much more than most would expect (since I don't really spoil you guys on where the plot's going, you wouldn't know my original plans and how much the current iteration is different from them lol), so it's less noticeable than if I were to go back and change the material I've already made public to you, if that makes any sense.

But I do definitely still do that, and I mentally retract, redact, or rewrite things about the Blest world or its characters in my head all that time, primarily because those details no longer fit or I'm not as big of a supporter of them as I may have been in the past! Hope that all makes sense!

#Shepherds of Haven #spoilers #mild #alpha build #alpha preview #me #personal #writing

[nameforthemain]

Hey I hope you enjoyed my last mutuals game! I have a new one! (hopefully this makes sense 😂. )

A witch has cast a spell on your mutuals 👀 and have turned them into their spirit animals, what animals do you think they changed into? Also bonus one if you want it what colour best signifies your mutuals?

Again no pressure in doing this

ooooh returning ask game anon, hello again 👀 this is fun. And helpfully enough, I keep a list of which animal each Jeff cult member is so that covers most of my mutuals already 😌 Then the colour is probably based mainly on blog themes lol but it's supposed to be the first colour I think of 😭

@wolferine - a wolverine - yellow

@bonkie-barnes - bear (also hi bonkie if you actually see this) - brown

@flightplan-fox - ...a fox - orange

@earth-to-ezra - raccoon - green

@alexia-redacted - cat, though tbf you give more big dog vibes hehe - orange

@family-house-of-m - giraffe - yellow

@yungdumbrok - seal (also hi!) - blue

@the-fandom-abyss - otter - grey

@leolionsblog - lion - orange

@taysmirrorball13 - small dog; I can imagine you speeding around when you're excited hehe but you also bite 🤨 - pink

@spaceynat - frog (still mutuals in spirit even if I don't follow your other account 🤭) - green

I know I've missed a few mutuals, but these were just the ones I had definitive answers for 😭

#peppa answers asks #ask game #thanks for sending this :)

[aeide-thea]

i feel like fairly regularly i make posts on here that are like 'huh, turns out that actually this Cut-For-Women garment i thought was fairly neutral and would be unremarkable makes me dysphoric!!' and then like. learn nothing from that realization and make an identical post about a different garment some months later—

like it's complicated because as a short king* i do frequently enjoy eg short shorts. are they masc? no. is my (inaccurate but gratifying) self-concept one of those, like, vintage dudes in short shorts when i wear them? yes, so it's fine. and there are some other things like that, where like, if i do the right mental gymnastics they can work for me (i started to specify but like. does anyone really care, lol. apply within in the unlikely event that you Must Know, i guess!).

however i think negative ease is like. more and more consistently a problem for me. like it just feels to me like such a vestige of womenswear training—

[here i'd originally typed out and then redacted a whole excursus on like, all the transmasc fashion blogs you used to see years ago where people would put together these legitimately masc outfits and then on the bottom they'd do these incredibly clingy skinny jeans, bc like, who am i to police that, maybe they were into the deliberate juxtaposition of it! but i did always wonder at the time whether it was just, like, a leftover womenswear habit they hadn't yet actively scrutinized, although probably it was unenlightened of me to be noticing it at all…]

—and the more i move away from that training, the more i find that things i've bought which don't have actively positive ease just strike me as, like, weirdly shrunken and constricting?? which is frustrating when they're things whose material, color, &c i otherwise still quite like!

anyway really this is a post abt how i currently have one (1) hoodie i like, and in theory it would be nice to have a second one both for more color combination possibilities and also because i hear you're like. supposed to take things off and wash them ever, even if merino is magic or whatever. however (a) there aren't any other interesting colors in that particular model, really, and the people who do make interesting colors (icebreaker) really want you to be taller than i am, especially for menswear; and (b) the whole problem is extremely irritating because i do have another older hoodie in a colorway i still quite like! there's nothing wrong with it except that stupidly i bought it too form-fitting at the time and now even though by womenswear standards it does in fact still 'fit' the way it clings through my shoulders/arms is making me insane!

in conclusion, grr, argh, &c.

⸻ * 'king' isn't really the right language for me but like. in a totally inexplicable turn of events (it's very explicable. we can do a whole sidebar on how binary gender is a pillar of the kyriarchy or whatever.) most noble titles i'm aware of are very binarily gendered. maybe we'll go with 'marquess' bc like. it's a man's title but also looks feminine by ordinary english standards and like. what am i if not the ruler of a border area.

#sartorial #mundanities #(i do realize these are not like. externally interesting posts but sometimes you just have to braindump.) #(also a lot of the time talking about clothes is how i emotionally come to terms with not purchasing them‚ tbh.) #(so it's like. an important budgetary coping mechanism or whatever‚ lol.)

[decaydanceredacted]

To make up for my Ao3 advertising and non-redacted submissions here, I figured I'd finally offer a true submission.. (off anon bc I already revealed my blog name in my last submission-)

I have a horrible obsession with cnc and stalking, (Which leaks into pred/pray kink stuff-) and when that last tour video of Joe and Patrick dropped, when Joe raises his eyebrow when Pat tries to challenge him for once and IMMEDIATELY backs down. (I hope we all know what I'm talking about here)

Let me tell you, said video has kept me up at night and still clouds my head, and I can't count the number of fantasies that have spawned from this. In the simplest way possible, I want to be hunted and chanced by Joe. (I apologize that this is gonna be lengthy)

So anyways, there's this particular fantasy that's been super prominent for the past week concerning Joe and Pete.

To set a small background up, you know both Joe and Pete, either as friends or simple acquaintances. (Bonus points if they had been joking with you about breaking into your house and using you and had been teasing you about it) Imagine being home alone. It's dark out, maybe a little stormy, and you're watching a show or movie on your couch or whatever. You get up to go to the kitchen, but as you round the corner, there's a shadow standing in front of you that isn't your own. You have nothing to grab in defense as you slowly back away from the kitchen doorway, and your heart only sinks further into your stomach as you recognize the face of the intruder. Pete's standing a few inches from you, an almost playful smirk on his lips. Instinct kicks in, you run through the house, thinking if you can get to your bathroom or bedroom, you can at least barricade yourself from him. Almost comically, as you run into your bedroom, you run straight into Joe. Maybe you try to scramble and run from Joe, but he just grabs you by your shirt or hair and throws you onto your own bed.

The two of them proceed to have their way with you, using you. Pete can't shut up about how long he's been watching you through your windows, saying shit like how much he's craved your body after catching glimpses of it through windows. And Joe can't shut up about how hungry he's been for you, how he's considered cornering you when you've hung out before but he wanted to wait so that both him and Pete could have their fun with you. Maybe he was the one who convinced Pete to join him.

They put you on your knees first, taking turns with your throat before they get bored and try and see if you can take both of them in your mouth at the same time, laughing at you, humiliating you. They eventually move onto fucking you silly, taking turns with your hole while you whine and try not to moan, not wanting to give them the satisfaction of knowing you're enjoying it. If you turn away from them, one of them grabs your chin and tells you to 'keep watching, or else.' And if you try talking back to them, you get slapped, bit, or spit on.

Once they get close to cuming, Pete switches to using your mouth, throat fucking you while Joe continues to destroy you in Missionary. Joe makes sure you're full, and Pete makes sure you swallow. At this point you'd forgotten you weren't supposed to be enjoying this, hell you'd even forgotten they'd broken into your house in the first place. And then bc I'm a sucker for good endings, they make sure to give you proper aftercare and spend the night with you, all the while knowing they're just gonna use you again tomorrow.

Apologies if that was a lot.

Kinda debating on actually making this a fic, but I wouldn't make it an x reader probably bc I don't like writing x readers lol.

-Sybil

.

#jt #pw #jt + pw #tw rape #cnc tag #extra long redacted

[hummingbird-games]

Dev Diaries

July 5, 2023

Again. Very upset I can’t just be a game consumer and consumer only BECAUSE I’m making my way through Itch.io, playing jam games, talent surpassed, I’m homebound 🎶🎷

Guys 😭 the entries for Otome and Josei jam this year?? I’m finally in a place where I can play more entries and it’s just banger after banger. If you worked in any capacity on one of those entries, I love you. I am in awe of you. I hope you only get the best things in life. I want to do highlights, but that’ll be a future post, and I haven’t decided if it’ll be on the main HBG blog or my review side blog. 

As for the real purpose of this Dev Diaries? I’m at an impasse. Firstly, I want to toot my own horn and celebrate that after a small break from direct work on Crushed, I just finished a full, thorough playthrough for note taking purposes (and to get my mind right, as my mom would say). Y’all, it’s still a banger. I’m still very much in love with what’s been created, and even more excited impatient for y’all to play the game! Which brings me to the impasse.

CGs, more voice acting, and [redacted] are things I’ve kept in my back pocket for Crushed but held off on because 1) it was a jam entry 2) supposed to be a learning experience and cathartic writing exercise 3) a pallet cleanser before I begin another period of long game development, possibly longer than HSD:JY and 4) self-funding. I like money. It does not like me apparently. 

I keep saying that the character sprites--and onnnnnne minor coding issue I recently discovered, Jesus be a FENCE, EYE 😑-- are what’s keeping us from a clear release date, and honestly they’re the only things needed if I wanted to publish the game and never look at it ever again. So, I propose an idea that’s been kicking around in my head. It has pros and cons but the ultimate goal is what players want because on my end, I’ve made peace with whatever happens. 

Option 1 - We push back Crushed to Fall/Winter 2023. You get a finished base game PLUS I hoard some funds now so we get some of the cool things in my back pocket! Maybe I even request some assistance LOL!

Option 2 - Crushed is released the moment it can be out (still aiming for this summertime). In the meantime, I upload the complete but unfinished build to the Ko-Fi page under a monthly subscription or one time ko-fi fee (whichever is best). Those who can’t wait any longer can play sooner, and those who can wait...can wait. Lol. 

Personally, I lean towards the second option only because this was a jam entry and it while I like dreaming big, this wasn’t supposed to be the fruits of that labor. I don’t want to set a precedent where I throw my all into jam entries that are supposed to be something small, low stress, fun, and a chance to grow as a creator. But option one has me giddy because wouldn’t it be CUTE to release a winter game during winter??? Ehh?? Ehh??

I’m going to abuse the polls feature again because honestly, I never know how many of y’all read these devlogs 😂 I’d like the majority to win, and I can reblog a poll a bunch of times to annoy y’all into a response LOL!!

Of course, if you have thoughts, please feel free to comment! I’m headed back to play some more jam entries and maybe start tackling my reading goal for the month.

- Gemini 💛

Psssttt: If you’re reading this YOU SHOULD PLAY BAND CAMP BOYFRIEND AND TROUBLE COMES TWICE and then go rate and review the games. cool. bai!

#gamedev #gamedev rambles #crushed vn #let me know your thoughts!!! #please note: the options are merely suggestions. the goal is to get y'all the game. so. yup.

[gulfportofficial]

I’m kinda compelled to explain or just talk about why I’m being Like This about Ana Mardoll and Lockheed Martin, like specifically him (”Like This” as in not shutting up about it and obsessively reading ALL the tweets and bad faith arguments lol.) At the risk of giving myself a wee anxiety spiral about it, I think I will do so below the cut.

SO ANYWAY as you all know because I also never shut up about it, I am very old. Well, too old to be reading this much internet drama lol. I’m 38, which I tell you to contextualize the rest of this tale, starting with the fact that I was 18 when 9/11 happened, and at that time I was out of home, working full time, living a weird life with a man who would turn out to be a very bad person. 

I mention both the weird life and 9/11 because it’s crucial to understand that I was both isolated by a man who was treating me badly, and would go on to treat me criminally badly, and very quickly involved in anti-war activism. At that time I wasn’t remotely involved in organizing, didn’t know any organizerzers, I just. You know. Have never liked imperialism or the senseless murder that goes along with it and went to all the protests. 

A couple of years later I had left the bad man and I was with my husband... and that’s its whole own other thing. My husband definitely was... well, this is not a story about that. Let’s just shorthand it with the fact that I thought he was a fucking prince because he didn’t [redacted] me or [redacted] me, which is a very low bar for a partner, and he was not, actually, obviously, a fucking prince. Suffice it to say, I was still being isolated, bullied, and manipulated in my own home by someone who was supposed to love me. And I was still involved in anti-war activism. Even though my husband was, at the time, AGGRESSIVELY “apolitical” lol.

I don’t know how to explain to you how different it was back then in the early-mid aughts. Facebook literally didn’t exist, no social media did. You had web forums and stuff, but like, for all the clickbait 2-minutes hate outrage issues with social media, what has fundamentally changed from that time is that you kind of have a sense generally of what is happening in the world. We did not have that in the aughts. It was so, so fucking hard to find information about what was actually happening in Iraq. All we had was “legitimate” news sources like TV and newspapers, and those sources LIED to us. Like, openly lied. When they didn’t do that, they misled. I remember once a NZ TV news story talking about how they in fact DIDN’T find WMDs in Iraq and they said this over footage of piles of WMDs? They were saying the “didn’t” real fucking quiet iykwim. 

So we read blogs. I remember how much it meant to me to find Joel Mathis’ blog on which he wrote about how authorizing torture for the occupation was ethically wrong. Not “wrong for American values” or “wrong according to the constitution”, ethically wrong. I read a whole bunch of stuff actually, but what is relevant here is that a friend pointed me to Shakesville and I read that. 

It was real easy to just like, describe yourself as an authority in those days. The thing about Shakesville is it was presented to me as part of general leftism, with a focus on feminism (actually, initially I was introduced to it because of fat politics, and for all my eventual loathing of Shakesville I still have to say that MM did some pretty good work with what she wrote about that), but like crucially as if if you focused on the interpersonal and unpicking the kyriarchy in your individual language and choices, you could totally fight the power. The other thing about Shakesville is that Ana Mardoll was a mod there.

I was never a community member or a devotee, just an on and off reader (I was not there for the All In fiasco, for eg). But Shakesville is an obvious and popular example of the broader thing anyway. That kind of talk was happening everywhere. And I leaned into it HARD! I had gotten into university when I was 22/23 or so and I was studying and learning COLLEGE THINGS about like, as I say, the kyriarchy. I relentlessly picked apart and policed my language and the language of others honestly and sincerely thinking that if I could just get it right, do it exactly right, it would have some kind of positive impact on the world. 

I’m a discourse analyst - someone who studies language and what it does in the world - so obviously I do believe that language and how we use it is VERY important to understanding power within culture, and I’m also not some Bro who thinks that feminism and antiracism and so on in our own homes are “distractions” from the real issues or anything. But the hyperliberal, relentless focus on every single word and interaction as the ONLY site of progressive politics in those spaces, both online and off? Yeah, I fucking hated it. I was miserable and scared all the time. I felt constantly surveilled. 

Great time for someone who already had PTSD (something else I didn’t know at the time) and was getting more of it (something else I ALSO didn’t know at the time). 

But the other thing is I also thought it was fucking STUPID, while simultaneously beating myself up for not being an enlightened enough person to understand that it was Smart Actually, that the best most clever most ethical people (I mean, they said they were) thought this, and what was wrong with me that I couldn’t get there. But I thought it was so stupid! And I couldn’t SAY stupid, that word is ableist. You can’t rip on Yale Legacy Daddy Was The President G.W. Bush for getting Cs and STILL GETTING TO BE THE PRESIDENT because it indicates that you are ableist towards people who do not get As.

(I think about that one all the time because in retrospect it’s such a TELL lol. Just bypassing the point that we’re talking about someone whose class position means he never has to excel to be handed the finest things to cut straight to a world where obviously everybody talks about what grades they got in school and what everybody else got and how they feel about it now, years later, as Very Smart Ladies Obviously on the internet.) These contexts were EMOTIONAL. People cried. You “hurt” them you “invalidated” them you “invisibilized” them you were selfishly focused on the “wrong things” because of your privilege (always theirs, never yours) blah blah blah blah blah. 

Look, my lunchbreak is up so I don’t have time to write anymore, so I’ll just quickly summarize where this story would have went had I had another 1/2 hour: that shit did a lot of damage to my brain and heart, it was bound up together with the damage my home life was doing, and I still struggle with what a complete fucking garbage heap I feel like for DAYS the moment someone deploys that wilting liberal shit on me. 

So basically I’ve been checking in with and mocking Ana’s content for years because it’s kind of like a sanity check. It was not me, it was those fucking people and their goddamned bad opinions. When Ana (like those others) said he was the smartest, goodest, most worthy source for how to Think Right and Be Ethical in the world, he was in fact lying (just like the TV news), because his analysis is neither precise nor useful, neither thoughtful nor kind. 

Popping on twitter to be like, oh ok Ana still thinks making jokes about beans in chili as a Texas thing is “othering bullshit” because some Texans don’t even like chili is kind of centering. Ana still thinks his fucking dog is trans. Ana is a goddamned idiot and the emperor has no clothes and works for Lockheed Martin and was never, ever actually invested in the things I believe in at all. 

[bylrndgm]

ok hi —

so, this is the most embarrassing thing i've ever done in a while, lol. i'm kinda back from my three days hiatus. i know no one noticed because i literally didn't want to yk post about it, cause a fuss, aaaand it would've made me look too much of an attention seeker so i just blended into the bg.

i thought it was getting bad again, turns out i was just overstimulated and in a bad mood. which is completely normal (idk if it is, but for me it is) and as i always do when i hate it in my head, i run away from things and hide until it gets better (just for instance, i hid in my bedroom for a week or so some years ago because of [redacted]).

and you know, a tiny drop of sadness causes a black ocean and my sky turned pitch black and i felt the earth opening wide beneath my feet and i was like uh oh am i gonna fall again? and from a tiny thing i started feeling sad about like everything and last night was my last straw because ugh.

did you ever had someone you loved but you were too heartbroken to? like you loved them deep inside of you, but you wouldn't dare to love them consciously because god forbid if you were to feel love or happiness when you were supposed to feel sorrow and despair? it's like you have these two forces and i, years ago, i succumbed to sorrow and lost that one person. lost in the sense that we were on our different ways and moved on, and i was left to wonder what could've been.

today i woke up fine (kinda, still thinking abt that person lol). like all the clouds were gone, a bright sky in my mind and i was like, yeah you're acting childish by leaving your friends on read or leaving your silly online blog because of one bad day. so dramatic of me. 🙄 so yeah, kinda back? i gotta fix up my blog graphic all over again but yeah, guess i'll be fully back in the next upcoming days. till then, sorry for the mess 👹

three days hiatus update: i fell into a reddit rabbit hole i.e., the most mysterious song on the internet rabbit hole and i wanted to ask my dad if he recognized the song because who knows (my dad, grew up in this tiny ass town in the mountains, of course he knows about an obscure 80s song from Germany /sarcastic) but he's been in a mood too. maybe this weekend will do! then um, nothing much else. uh, well, guts came out today and i gave it 2 listens and i love it - might head to the local record store to see if they have it ;)

k bye, gotta go, glad to be back ig? and can't wait to rb all the posts i liked these past few days (not many, like 3 but💀)

#elz's chit chats #just me being stupid on main whatever #hi again tell me guys how have you been

[deviantfreelancer]

Before we get started:

OOC: As it should be obvious, I’m not actually the freelancer lol, just someone who wants to jump onto the redacted blogs. To be honest, I also want to explore around freelancer’s character and if no other D.A.M.N blogs show up, then I’m gonna try to see what I can do with interactions with the current blogs around.

Also I saw the Solaire accounts and I just wanted to kinda play around with freelancer

Edit, moments after I posted this: I literally JUST found them omfg-

Rules:

I am an adult so 18+ is allowed but please, nothing way too explicit. Innuendos are allowed 👍

No hate or anything please, it’ll just be deleted. Keep it to yourself.

No violence, either. Just not too explicit and all that stuff.

Absolutely zero tolerance for homophobia, transphobia, anything anti-LGBT.

I’m just a fan, and I’m still watching most videos and not too sure about some things concerning lore, so please excuse my mistakes and don’t hesitate to correct me.

Important Tags

[in character] Freelancer - self explanatory, im in character as freelancer

[Gavin was here 😘] - Gavin took Freelancer’s phone or it was given to him

[ooc post] - out of character related posts, sometimes in “in character” tags, i’ll put ooc comments in the tags

[art] - self explanatory

I can’t think of anything else so I suppose that’s it!

#redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted freelancer #roleplay

[feuqueerfire]

The Sign Live Blogging

I was supposed to watch Only Friends after Pit Babe but then took over a week off of watching new shows because I had to write a Pete/Kenta fic and now instead of Only Friends, I'm watching The Sign.

I know incredibly little about this show except it involves Billy and a guy I don't know, there's monsters? sci-fi/fantasy elements? cops? I watched like a few tiktoks/gifsets from eps 1 and 2 but those didn't give away much. Also, there was angsty stuff going on in this show during that week when Pit Babe ep 10? aired and [redacted] [redacted] and Last Twilight was getting a lot of flack for ep 12 but I can't remember if it was because somebody died or not

Anyway, here we go, hope to love it, as always.

Ep 1 (Feb 20)

1-1

Ah, I for a split second wondered if that person was gonna betray them... but was like nah, this is just the beginning and we don't know anything, would they would that rn? maybe that look was meant to signify that he's gonna get himself killed by being stupid? but ig they would make him betray them (though was that a real hostage or also a dummy?)

ohhh we got powers here too? Jeff in Pit Babe needed to touch someone to see their future but ig it's just visions at random times here?

I wish the first 10 minute fight sequence was shorter because we knew nothing but the last 3-4 minutes was interesting because we see more of the characters at play beyond just fighting

1-2

Ah, it was a little educational test. I knew it was about cop training, so I guess this makes sense

Were the censored butts necessary lol

ohhh people don't believe Tharn can see the future and would make fun of him

Ohh Tharn's visions often include Phaya

Also at first I didn't get what iron rod they were talking about but I rewatched and seems like there are iron rods protruding from the poles

Man, Chart's gonna be like Winner (Pit Babe) isn't he? But maybe more skilled and so less pathetic but more dangerous? Equally annoying maybe?

Does Tharn like Phaya already?

Are the guys who keep calling each other Baby dating for real or is this a joke? So many dudes, can't keep track of who is who

omg are Tharn and Phaya becoming friends aw

I just realized from the comments Chart is Kawnah (from KawnahTurbo and TharnType's Lhong)

1-3

"a sign in your vision but couldn't stop it" oh is that why this is called The Sign

Oh Chart is gonna already? delightful

oh wtf, a sea monster?

woah gorgeous gorgeous beautiful sea monster for real, I was not expecting it to look so beautiful instead of kinda janky CGI

not the ethereal being reaching her hand out to rescue Phaya and that hand becoming Tharn's pulling him up

What's the thing Tharn always wanting to do

dang, that girl is Tharn? but like magical? his magical projection when he couldn't physically go to help Phaya?

not past life soulmates

Chart haunting this story by being annoying even after he's left goddamn

Shoulda dropped some money for the auntie before leaving for making a mess of her restaurant

Phi Yai so funny watching Tharn and Phaya run away hand in hand talking about feeling like his nong is about to fall in love

I'll be honest if i was a gay dude and my crush drew a girl who looked like me and had my name but again was a girl, I'd lose my shit

1-4

Why is P'Yai obsessed with Tharn and Phaya, it's so embarrassing for them >.<

ouuu not this random kiss

damn a Lieutenant died and was found in the water

Is the Lieutenant dead fr or no cuz why'd the other instructor kinda give Phaya the go-ahead to do some investigating on his own

man, Phaya and Tharn are so cute! At first during the 5 day training I'd thought they weren't friends but then became friends throughout it but obviously not

oh lol so the guys actually have something going on on-and-off

pls not Yai airing out everything about his bro including his single and virgin status

this bathroom scene why?? i'm so embarrassed but also shy

A tree? monster??

wtf how can you even drink to "Do you like someone at this table?" Like the answer is then obviously yes and the answers aren't very broad lol considering there are only 4 people and one of them is your brother. and there's also the guy that everybody is teasing you and him about

What a good first episode! I'm very intrigued both in terms of the romance (it's so cute idk like why do they interact in a way that makes me kinda shy) and the fantasy elements + mystery elements. The straight-up fighting elements are alright but I could do with less. Also, tragic that we're getting copaganda but oh well

Also, Pit Babe and The Sign started in November while Dead Friend Forever started in December. The people who watch these BLs weekly must've been having a ball with so many shows exploring new genres and high-concepts in BL. Also interestingly, both Pit Babe have Pavel and Billy who each have been in BLs before and lead them as one of the main pairs while their partners Pooh and Babe are new to the industry. Ta and the other guys apply a little less since Ta only had small roles before and Dead Friend Forever seems more ensemble cast but kinda similar ig

Ep 2 (Feb 20)

As expected, I have a hard time stopping watching a show when I start even though I have work to do.

Also, while looking for ep 1 gifs, I came across some stuff about the naga (snake) and eagle but I didn't read much into the post but I guess those creatures will feature prominently throughout the show

2-1

aghh I'd seen this hiding under blanket scene in a gif or tiktok or something before it's so aksldfj cute [or was it a kinda different scene? cuz feels like they were more giggly hmm]

Ah, Tharn wants to joing the Special Investigation Unit to investigate his dad's death (and Yai isn't related to him by blood)

Is Captain Akk with them? For now, I'm guessing he also wants answers and that's why he's wanting more evidence + telling Phaya to get evidence + not stopping the little group from investigating

2-2

But now he does seem kinda suspicious...

omg a siren call type thing?

hmm Phaya says that Tharn looks like the girl in his dream... was he sleepwalking when he started following the magical girl?

Oof they got caught but okay again, it seems like indeed the captains are also investigating the cause of death and are not against our main characters

2-3

gorgeous shot

ah, past lives talk again

now we have some real cops on our hands oof

oh wait hah they were taking 5 special investigation students and it just happens to be our 5 characters lol

so cute they're so cute omg

also glad that

I gasped out loud, whoever Tharn loves will die? omg, this show has Everything fr

2-4

ahhh no, that's probably not Phaya's gf, don't mourn, Tharn <- I say as somebody who is mourning

ack, Phaya is no annoying with intercepting the drink from Oat (random guy buying Tharn a drink) agh you're jealous, do you know that?

Wish the lyrics were translated

lol their Spin the Bottle never ends

The drinking obviously means the answer is yes, wtf don't be silly guys

Would Phaya have fr chosen Tharn? ah the questions

AND OF COURSE THEY'RE LONG LOST CHILDHOOD FRIENDS why would they not be? I'd thought they'd mention that Phaya also lives at the same province as Tharn and Yai when it was mentioned earlier in 2-3 (Nong Khai?) but then they didn't but I guess they indeed met each other at kids at that province

Yai in his drunken state still making Phaya give Tharn a piggyback ride and take him to his condo

Ah, this is what the "Billy and Heng playing enemies instead of friends" was about

Didn't mean to watch the Ep 3 teaser but omg Phaya has prophetic dreams or something?

I'm really into like... Billy's physicality? I don't know how to word this, just the way he carries himself, I guess. It's very Boy and I'm envious but it's also attractive

Ep 3 (Feb 21)

Watching this in the dark on my iPad at 2am

3-1

ah how do i feel about a love triangle hmmm like theoretically it could be good idk some passive aggressiveness and jealousy amongst the suitors. also saw something about the lore behind it like heng’s character is the naga who has loved Than forever vs Phaya is some eagle guy who is Tharn’s one true love who is meant to die over and over omg??

15th day of the 11th waxing moon seems an important day, Phaya used to dream of the magical girl only on that day but now he dreams of her more often

3-2

oh lol i straight up thought they were all already in Nongkai cuz that conversation had insinuated they’d all meet at Nongkai for some reason. this makes more sense

oh did Tharn do some people wrong in his past life and they are still after him for vengeance?

lol why is Phaya so surprised about the amulet thing, he had a big hunch from last night

ah, so Tharn has bad karma from his past life and his life is intertwined with Phaya’s who will make him experience bad things but can also free him fr the bad karma

Ah, Tharn gave Phaya the amulet on the night of 15th day of 11th waxing moon and that’s when the dreams used to happen. i guess that’s why Phaya said he needs to go to where the dreams started and came to this temple on this day

the first time the childhood amulet thing came up i was like lol not this childhood friends who forgot each other again trope but this is actually such a good interpretation of it. they met at this festival where Phaya was drowning and Tharn saved him after seeing a vision, similar to how many times Tharn has seen him in a vision + has saved him from drowning whether it be himself or his last girl self. and also the amulet that started Phaya’s dreams

and it’s not like the trope of perfectly fine adult relationship that had random childhood backstory for no reason. this one is that the reason they even have this adult friendship and crush is because they met each other that time and were told they’ll meet again since their lives are intertwined ah Phaya dreamt of the naga often as a child

ah so many things happening. so the naga keeps calling Phaya to the water or is it the girl? and the naga wants to drown him under there but Tharn’s past life girl/Tharn in this life doesn’t allow it?

and these last words are so heavy lol protect each other and undo your bad karmas

3-3

this Naga said No Peace for Phaya

The Naga festival and cave and myths are so cool

3-4

what??? i was like aw at the cheek kiss but then the liplick goodnight kiss happened and i was literally like is this a dream? is it just that Phaya is drunk and so is actually kissing Tharn like he wants to?

On the one hand, who gives a fuck if a serial killer is killing rapists, let it go - so annoying if cops and the justice system can't keep rapists off the streets but can put the people behind killing rapists behind bars agh

On the other hand, killer seems to just be the mastermind and forcing other people to do their dirty work and murder is too big of a thing to force people to do so agh I suppose they should stop them

Also, is this gonna be related to the Lieutenant's death at all or are we forgetting about that one? the methods of killing are different though

Not as many comments, esp in the last 2 parts despite the episode being like over 80 mins or smth cuz I was watching on my iPad and sometimes had my phone with me to write thoughts down and sometimes didn't.

Continues to be intriguing, put out so many different threads and it feels like we got a few answers but so many more questions.

Also, I didn't realize the actress playing Sand is a trans woman but yay, employing trans people let's gooooo and in roles that aren't making a fool of them either!

Ep 4 (Feb 21)

4-1

Noooo okay fuck this killer mastermind I can't believe they made the woman who was sexually assaulted by some dude and then had her case dismissed was forced to kill him under duress

omg the stepson who was raped by his stepfather and was forced to kill him, this killer is literally forcing the victims to kill the perpetrators and it must be so horrifying to kill somebody but, like the woman said, she was glad that he was dead and wouldn't be able to harm anybody

clown mask

ah this investigation itself could be a 12-16 ep procedural kdrama, I wonder how they're gonna deal with this as a side plot in this already high-concept show

Oh yeah, I didn't recognize Surprise (from SCOY) in last ep but he's the IT kid

got food to eat lunch as they're eating dinner but it's so hard to type now

who is this fortune-telling, face-changing, snake-bracelet wearing woman?

4-2

what is going onnnnn

oh kissing??? and caressing

a dream ofc makes sense. since that ep 3 kiss was real i thought may be this was as well

was that tharn in the pic that shattered

lmfao the finger in egg + licking it off + "I like it raw" ??

and then the sausage eating ahh Tharn let Phaya suck your dick, he's going crazy

hehe Phaya caught in his broken bike excuse

Tharn's secretiveness regarding Phaya spending the night makes it seem so much more salacious than it was

oh damn, it was just 3 days ago that Meena was kidnapped and forced to kill that guy?

ah, I don't remember her name but one of the SCOY girls!

fungal spores in their lungs, not gonna lie it reminds me of To Sir With Love mushrooms lol

Ah, I did wonder if somebody in their little quintuple (+ the boss Akk) was gonna betray the team but I suppose one of them could also be behind the mastermind killer

Why'd the criminal lowkey look like Akk?

Anyway, I kinda like that in 1-1 combat, Phaya wins over Tharn but Tharn's always out here saving Phaya because he can see when he's in danger heh

Also funny because the Abbot and the mystery woman was like never let go of Tharn and that Phaya's gonna help Tharn get rid of his bad karma, meanwhile Tharn's protecting Phaya all the time. guess it'll be balanced eventually

Ah, Phaya casually talking about getting stabbed to death and how it'd be solely his fault, nothing to do with Tharn. Meanwhile, Tharn has seen Phaya in near-death experiences like 5 times in his visions and saved him so far but is haunted by the experiences

4-4

Is it Akk and he's covering for himself by saying no fingerprints? Reminds me of Beyond Evil where Park Jeongje's fingerprints appeared in the forensics results but they made it disappear hmmm

pls not Tharn being like k whatever as he's jealous about Phaya and new girl Dao vs Phaya being like lemme Intervene as he's jealous about

Phaya is so annoying omg

Oof, did Tharn tell the doctor guy (man I can't remember Heng's character's name beyond it starting with C and similar to Shortcut) about Phaya's nightmares? Or did Doctor man come to find out about it some other way (since he's also connected to them via lifetimes? Is he sending nightmares and trying to drown Phaya on purpose or anything?)

Ah, so Doctor is decidedly a troublemaker/antagonistic and not accidentally so

omg Phaya is really angry (and violent :/)

AI to construct a face under a mask and hood, be serious girl, this cannot possibly be accurate

Okay, if this last murder is being done by the killer himself to avenge his sister who was raped and committed suicide, I think we should let him play it out. arrest him afterwards lol

I hope they clarify next ep that Tharn didn't tell the doctor about the dreams because he would never do that

Next ep has 5 parts woah and is gonna be like ~80 mins of runtime, these are pretty long episodes but don't feel that long and I don't feel the need to speed it up (except I think I did 1.1x once and also wanted to skip some of the gratuitous butt shots/that dream shower scene lol though I didn't)

I was kinda avoiding watching the dream sex scene (watched it in mini on the corner of my screen lol) and so I didn't have too many thoughts except once Phaya wrapped his palm around Tharn's neck. But going through people's gifsets, I've seen a few mentions of how we know this is a manifestation of Tharn's desires, whether it be the choking kink lol or liking getting pushed around dommed and that it's fun to actually get to see his fantasy like that. honestly a FAVE aspect when I think about it that way like aw his desire to be manhandled

Ep 5 (Feb 21)

I'm hungry and want to get dinner but am afraid that there'll be too much genetelia talk and will lose my appetite... maybe I'll gauge how gross it's gonna be first

Also, accidentally thought Ep 5 aired on Dec 24 and so ended up looking at tumblr posts made on Dec 23 (actual date it came out) and so was spoiled that the forensic guy was scheming with the murderer guy for this serial killing

5-1

oof shoulder check

okay I lied, I got too hungry and got dinner but am now gonna be unable to type for at least part 1 probably cuz food hands

okay I'm done eating and gotta say that hmmm too violent

Phaya is just too physically violent in his anger, especially the fact that he deliberately punched the wall beside Tharn's head and also accidentally backhanded him but didn't apologize. like I know we're meant to catch the range of emotions in his face, including guilt and apology for accidentally hitting but he purposefully doesn't apologize and yeah, nope

oh this fucker, why can't they just use this rapist as bait to catch the killer, why does he need to be protected. innocent man my ass

hm, the smaller black van is gonna get crashed into by a big white truck and the killer is seen with the van... is the rapist guy gonna be in the van when it crashes?

yess tomato tomato!

5-2

Man, they really had to have these killers force other people to do the first 3 murders in order to gain the audience support to stop the killer because like... what even is the reason for stopping them? If the cops and judicial system are gonna be useless, I think the little team should def kill this man as he's the reason their younger sister or gf is dead. should've teamed up to kill those other fuckers too tbh instead of involving the victims

let's kill him quickly (and painfully) before the cops come to stop you!

"I promise you that I will not let you die so easily" I get your need for torture but there are cops hunting you right now so hm

nah, not the amulet!

oh? is this guy naga too? the water magic thing?? also I think I saw a gif of Phaya fighting the killer and he had firey wrapped-up palms?

5-3

omg? Tharn taking the knife for Phaya and then somehow having red magic that defeats the blue man killer?

and he got a trinket? did Tharn get it from inside the killer? Was the killer wearing it?

oh hohoho Phaya saying he'll do everything Tharn says is really doing it for me

"The laws you worship and look up to can never keep those bastards behind bars for long" tell 'em. need these fuckass cops to be brought down a peg and get a sense of reality

rolled my eyes at Phaya's "There's the justice you're looking for. It might show up late but it will always come in the end." you cannot be this naive

that video the sister before she died was so fucked man i'm so sad now

stupid ass pep-talk from Captain Akk or whatever "I don't want a loser on my team" okay kys

enough copaganda, let's go back to the fantasy and romance and stuff because this story arc was so sad

Ah, so the car crash vision hasn't manifested yet

Or is that related to his parents death??

5-4

Ah, wearing the amulet again

pls Phaya prepping to make his moves

plssss both of them in their little fantasies

"I want to do just as you did to me" What? You wanna blow him? I acc have no clue why I'm so on the Phaya giving Tharn a blowjob train

not even little fantasies, incredibly long fantasies for both of them like okay Enough

but so funny like okay at least the first fantasy was Tharn dreaming but then he was getting off on that dream again the next morning in the kitchen while cooking and now here's Phaya with his fantasy while awake and mid-conversation

and also hilarious that Tharn's fantasy was like hand around neck + shower while Phaya's is... Tharn blowing on his wound like 40 times lol

Phaya's foiled plans

Oh, that's the gif I saw. Bandaged hands + black smokey magic from Phaya while grabbing Doctor by the shoulder??

lol Phaya speaking to Doctor as if he has any right to control who hangs around Tharn and to what degree. you forget yourself

"Until your time in done" ???

Ohh Phaya burned? Doctor's shoulder omg

not the sponge bath lmfao

lkasdfj the quick 123

Ah, Phaya being the bolster tonight

Phaya's taking advantage of sleeping Tharn fr but lol sure. I wonder if Tharn's also kinda awake lol

Phaya's dream: Freen magic woman -> Tharn and behind Phaya, very big eagle man (which is supposed to be him I guess?)

What happened this ep? Most of the beginning was focused on catching the killer, then the fantasy & staying over at Tharn's place, then being cute toward grandma. But stuff that happened in the middle: the killer can't remember what happened in the cellar but he def had magic (blue) and so did Tharn (red) - which he used to defeat the killer, Doctor and Phaya face-off where Phaya had black? coloured magic which burned Doctor - I wonder how much doctor knows? about the myth/past life stuff, the temple man (Luangpur?) told Tharn that Doctor and Phaya shouldn't meet. Then finally, the dream where we get Freen magic lady, kinda confirmation that she's indeed Tharn (this life), and also a visual of that tall eagle man. Also, from gifs, I realized that the amulet or whatever Tharn used to defeat the killer was his own, he tore it from his neck

Ep 6 (Feb 22)

6-1

I love the eagle fr I'm obsessed w the beautiful Naga from ep 1 too

ahhh lesbians !!!!!!!!!! hehehehehe

I don't care that much about this side couple and their backstory, let's hurry it up

lmfaooo okay funny but I would've murdered someone if all my papers went into the water like that

SCOY mention

huh?? Tharn dated someone and they died?

5-2

Why did Dao's actor become worse at acting? :( I think the script here is just bad because why would a character just recite these things? and they made her cross some lines with her "advice" about Phaya like you guys may be close but you can't say that you think he should quit his work lol

the triangulations lmfao I'm glad that even though Dao seems to care for Phaya a lot, she doesn't necessarily like him like that?

heh Nee coming to sus out if Phaya and Dao were ever a thing

and Phaya clocking that Nee and Dao are into each other lol

I like their little sibling relationship full of teasing but also Nee trying to guide Phaya into grandma's good graces

Dang, what's this painting the man thought was sold at the gallery about?

Okay, in this universe, it's just like ours where the stories of Naga and Garuda are thought to be myths/legends. I kept getting confused how much regular people believed because everybody seemed to believe whatever the monk said but that involved a lot of fantastical aspects + the Naga festival, so I wasn't sure what people in general believed (not just what Phaya and Tharn who are like reincarnations or smth of magical creatures believe lol)

6-3

pls let Tharn and Phaya have scenes together this section

oh man Phaya’s tendency to just do instead of speak and also drag Tharn around is kinda… agh

dang Doctor straight up said he’d seerate the two of them even if it means Tharn dies

oof punch but can’t quite blame Tharn

6-4

art something or other, who is this suspicious guy?

Was too sleepy to write anything for 6-4 but I have half-baked thoughts about the punch ig. On some YT comments and tiktok comments, I saw people annoyed at Tharn for not believing Phaya and people were calling him too stubborn and naive. I do think he should've taken Phaya's warnings/dreams more seriously cuz like girl, you're always seeing visions of him in danger so it can't be that much of a stretch to think he dreams of you in danger c'mon. But I also think Phaya is kinda too vague and doesn't explain properly like he can't just expect to burst in and physically drag Tharn away from Doctor who he has known for years and years and trusts; in contrast, Phaya and Doctor fought and Phaya even physically pushed him or whatever. So I get Tharn being like wtf... and also Phaya being desperate.

I hope they make up next ep (properly. through conversation and honesty and understanding) so that we can get them together again though bc we barely had them together this ep and unfortunately unlike Pit Babe ep 11 where the other characters were able to carry the ep w/o much Babe or Charlie, I don't care as much about the characters here.

Ep 7 (Feb 22)

7-1

As a mix of Death's Game murder artist + last ep's ending where Tharn saw someone (I'm assuming this guy) in a room maybe killing someone with red everything, I thought this guy (Art?) was gonna kill his (ex?)-lover. I still think that's the case cuz of the ending with all the red paint probably hiding the blood but lol at first, I literally thought the guy was asking to be killed and used to Art's painting lmfao but nah he wasn't that devoted, mans was getting married to someone else anyway

Anyway, cool idea, will be cooler once we realize he killed him

7-2

My biggest rip is that Wi can actually act while Dao's actress cannot, so I wish the actresses were switched or Nee's love interest was Wi

hm, so the VIP is the Minister Montree and we didn't get any visions or anything but Inspector Akk kinda makes me think he's behind Lieutenant Tam's death and I wonder if Tharn thinks he's behind his parents' death or at least the coverup. I also just realized is this the guy they were saying has ties to drug stuff that Lieutenant Tam was investigating and the rapist from last ep is tied with him too but they can't interrogate the rapist about him?

lol they talked about this after I wrote allthat

hmm Art said "That's too evill" before maybe puncturing the guy with a pen... so did that man himself suggest it?

I wish the camerawork focused on the art and dance better since it went on for so long

7-3

"To me, a guy named Kao, is already dead" oh man

Why is Phaya as a guest restraining the woman when there are so many cops who came to volunteer or whatever lmfao

Anyway, I thought they were gonna maybe pretend this was also part of the exhibition before he accidentally cut her (with the same pen that killed Kao? and was maybe gonna stab Montree with?)

Is Doctor doing some sort of dark influence/magic on Art? and the way he's physically touching Art on his thigh and then his chest over his heart and then hugging him... no.

okay atp Tharn Has to be kinda suspicious of Doctor knowing about Phaya's dreams/conditions and why he's using it against Phaya (and publicly too) and idk the way he's undermining Phaya like that... is he trying to make other people think of him as hysterical? As if he'd have an outburst similar to Art? but then Phaya almost becomes violent - strengthening Doctor's position...

ah yes, just casual handing over patient records to the cops <3 esp because Art isn't like... actually in jail or anything, idek what they're holding him based on. just cuz of a public outburst and possibly suspicion of maybe a reason behind Kao being missing? like c'mon cops are so fucking shit

bruh why are these cops just saying anything and everything about the case in front of the doctor? dumbasses

7-4

Tharn can see into a painting like this?

The Art and Kao hallucination (?) is so eerie, everything about this is so eerie, I really like it

omg so Kao was really selling the art and betraying Art

I love love love the spliced scene from that night and the same scene in a white room as Tharn and Phaya watch it (I'm assuming Art is recounting it?)

crazy ass pen to be able to rip somebody's throat open and kill them just like that

Oh, so they don't think Art has something to do with Kao's disappearance... but does that man disappearance of Kao the alive man (maybe he ran away abroad with Montree lol and that's how Montree had known to whisper to Art about it being the pen that hurt Kao) or his dead body?

okay at least the pen didn't kill Kao the way they were insinuating lmao I was like tf kinda pen

7-5

I actually cannot, Phaya and Doctor must be Stopped

oh confession ahhhhhh <333

lmfao I'm watching the shower scene in mini on the side lol too much for me

It Continues like okay Enough i'm like watching in mini with 1 eye only enough enough enough i'm so embarassed/shy I think after barely watching anything for so long and then only recently starting watching shows again that have NC scenes (kinda Law of Attention, Pit Babe, and now this) means that I've lost a lot of the tolerance I've built up against it lmfao

Ep 8 (Feb 22)

5 episodes left and they're each fairly short compared to some other ones (each is less than an hour I think?) so I hope they have proper time to wrap everything up in a satisfying way, esp with all the fantasy going on

8-1

omg? The book flipping to Doctor's face to make it seem like he's watching it all was creepy enough last ep but now he tried to kill Phaya via magic dream?? and only stopped because the monk woke Tharn up

I hope Tharn starts actually thinking about the Doctor critically now

They're so cute, I'm glad we can have cute Phaya and Tharn back for a bit because they were really upset with each other for the past 2 eps (and then resulting sex scene but that's still not cuteness yknow)

8-2

Having Phaya promise to not leave... sad if he does end up getting hurt/leaving/whatever and ironic if it's Tharn instead

Wait I'm so confused? Was the Doctor somehow shrouding Tharn and that's why Phaya couldn't see him?

omg even making Phaya see an illusion of Tharn, then once Phaya gets in the water, taking control of him

8-3

oh we finally get to see the past

Also this other world reminds me of Midnight Museum a bit

hm Tharn plays the past "sister" Wansa? I'd expected Freen... but maybe they don't wanna have to have Billy and Freen in such romantic situations etc

I'm South Asian but not Indian or Hindu, so it's very interesting to see these costumes/myths which are vaguely familiar but I'm not fully aware of because idk much about Hindu concepts beyond like the most well-known gods and festivals

ngl I'm slightly confused still but sure

The amlet is Wansarut's original SOUL? damn girl

ENOUGH of calling Wansarut her nong sao/younger sister. Tharn isn't a girl in this life at least, so say nong if you must why are you saying your sister and Phaya are in love when Tharn's now your brother agh

Bad CGI but I forgive because all the Thai show CGI has looked like this I think?

8-4

Kao died in the waters... I wonder if Doctor had something to do with it with his evil water magic since he knew Art and stuff and used Art as a way to get into the investigation...

oh never mind, killed somewhere else and dumped here

why not at least say Yai follow that man with me!

ohhhh that car crash vision was actually a flashback of him and his parents

ah, the scene with Tharn screaming while holding Phaya's still body

I commented about the gender thing like why are we doing Tharn as a girl bc it was kinda... why are we actually just pretending the character who is seemingly the bottom [I mean they're vers to Me but idk about canon lol] and sexually submissive is the girl fr instead of having an actual woman play Wansarut but then I saw a post that said that actually she takes on a female form under water but took on a male form above ground and yay gender fuckery and i'm like okay nice sure, I love gender fuckery.

I wish we got... slightly more time and a more coherent story that Showed the past life story better. I think this show is good with broad themes and parallels and characterization but kinda struggles sometimes with specific moments/scenes, which can make it kinda confusing or unsatisfying - this scene of the past life kinda feels like that to me.

Ep 9 (Feb 23)

9-1

yep Tharn is def gonna be like fuckkk ppl whom I love with die because I love them (and i mean in this case Doctor is making that true) and probably gonna withdraw and breakup after Phaya wakes up

since that Eye Contact moment with Montree’s bodyguard in ep 7? or whatever art gallery, it’s been clear this guy is suspicious and behind some stuff

Montree got Tharn parents killed and wants to kill him now

9-2

Okay so at least Inspector Akk seems to be on the hood side and also knows way more about the case like Korn (the bodyguard?) was behind this

who is Akk talking to?

The disparity between Ning and Dao’s actinng skills is just too much, why didn’t they make Dao be played by Wi the art gallery woman or Marys the forensic officer who are both better at acting ahhh

9-3

huh? why doesn’t Phaya have the Naga amulet? it came off in the water or something?

this is just silly what is even happening

wtf Chart? is that even a fr tattoo? Montree got someone else to get the tattoo/join the gang to throw ppl off his own trail or what

9-4

hopefully a real break from the cop stuff even though ig Tharn’s gonna investigate on his own

I wish Phaya would explain more to Tharn rather than being so cryptic

plssss man snuck out of her hospital to not only meet his past life love but also to have sex despite nearly dying for a few days

aw I wish this NC scene was longer, I’m kinda better at hanging these soft and loving sex scenes more than the crazy shot Horny desperate ones I think?

Also, Phaya kissing down from Tharn's chest and staying kinda on stomach in a similar fashion to how Tharn did it to Phaya during the shower sex scene... I'm gonna take it to allude to Phaya finally sucking Tharn's dick, I've waited for this moment for multiple episodes

Ep 10 (Feb 23)

10-1

Okay, discussion, good! And Phaya didn't tell Tharn about the Doctor but that's because the Abbott told him not to, so it's okay IMO

And it's a cute scene with the cuddling and just so domestic with how casual it is

Phaya was so desperate to make sure Tharn was okay (and also thirsty for that dick...) that he forgot to bring his phone or inform his grandmother and sister like omg

10-2

Phaya is so cute puppy as he's apologizing

Yai shut uppppp the music and vibes makes it seem like Grandma's gonna be okay but what if she wasn't and you outed them D:

pls the Grandma being like "Give me a second" before asking Phaya what the important thing he wants to say is aklsdfj so funny

Awww so supportive and cute T-T

Khem suspecting Inspector Akk of being in cahoots with Montree

SCOY and Gap mention

10-3

dang, is someone in the unit gonna betray them again? We already had Wit or whoever

ah, Tharn overhearing Phaya and the abbott about Doctor... Can I hope he won't do anything stupid lol

lmfao the grandmas complaining, so true

Tharn wants to quit his job after solving his father's case and just stay with his grandma? girl I wish I was rich omg

10-4

agh, Korn and Khom are same person then right? Cuz they're not consistent in naming

oof, Ning dead

lmfao I saw a post w the pic of the "A tiger-man is not real" line by Phaya with caption whatever you say bird-man like so true

everything converging in Nongkai i suppose

Ep 11 (Feb 23)

One episode until hopefully tomorrow morning it's ep 12? Cuz then it's perfect timing. Otherwise, it'll suck lol

11-1

Is the tiger-man and the person died related to this Montree drug ring

Is the instructor knowing about the visions gonna backfire or anything?

So many times people just overhear things lol like Ep 4 Phaya overhearing Tharn and Yai talking about the visions, Ep 10 Tharn hearing Phaya and Abbott talking about Doctor and stuff, and now Khem overhearing Phaya and Tharn discuss his footprints lol

No I get Tharn cuz it's like why does my lover claim to be so jealous of this guy who I've known for years and trust? To Tharn, it feels like Phaya doesn't trust Tharn

oh oops, he doesn't believe Phaya even he's told directly anyway, which I feel like is theoretically understandable like wtf are you even saying Phaya but if you believe the rest of it with past lives and naga and garud, then this is like yeah sure i suppose that makes sense lol + I thought he overheard Phaya and Abbott but no I guess??

ooh cool shot about the grandma to the flashback

omg ?? Doctor in child Tharn's room talking about how they'll be together when the times comes um ??

10-2

Oh, I just realized that the man who Inspector Akk was speaking with was actually probably Chart. like he's there to infiltrate and give info to Akk (and that's also why he hasn't resigned as a cop maybe)

sorry everytime Phaya's exasperated about the Tiger Man, I want him to be more real. like girl you believe you are a Garud reincarnated who is in love with Naga princess reincarnation and have been lovers in the past lifetime(s) and also that a current Doctor is actually a Naga like right now in his own current lifetime. your boyfriend has visions and you have dreams.

10-4

Dang, the cliff falling and surviving should’ve been more exciting I feel like? kinda feels like History 3: Trapped when Tang Yi and Shaofei got out of the forest out of screen lol

ah im really into the last scene bc it’s once again giving vers switch framing with the way that Tharn’s palm is not Phaya’s neck this time + That is sitting slightly taller than Phaya who has to look up at him

I feel like even with a 15 min longer ep they could’ve made part 4 more emotionally charged on-screen idk i might be nitpicking also, so funny cuz I thought Ep 12 was gonna be airing at 11am or so but then I finish watching this ep at like 9:04 or smth and see The Sign ep 12 live premiere schedule recommended on my YT feed and part 1 is airing right now cuz apparently the ep is releasing at 9 ig

Ep 12 (Feb 24)

Accidentally read a couple words of BLupdate's tweet for the ep and apparently Doctor sacrifices his soul? interesting ig

12-1

Doesn't trust anybody but does trust Chart lol

Okay but atp someone (else) from their unit Has to betray them right? Like Inspector Akk has mentioned it so many times

extremely hilarious to have Phaya who was limping around moments ago and Tharn go in guns blazing in casual clothes while all the other cops are in full gear and bulletproof vests etc

Do any of these gunshots from either side injure/kill anybody at all lmfao

oh finally some ppl (villainous) just drop dead from the shots lol

12-2

agh, Yai and Sand are honestly so cute >.<

So funny for Phaya to be talking about protecting Tharn like yes agree but throughout the show, Tharn has definitely protected you much more lol

Ah, I'm noticing the lighting choices after reading posts about it like the bokeh effect for Phaya and the concentrated warm colours for Tharn

Okay, I can watch this subdued and softer version of sex scene more than the desperate/erratic first one

okay lol ended up skipping last minute or so though heh

10-3

omg gorgeous, beautiful shots and directing and acting for Phaya finding Tharn gone and the whole desperate sequence with the grandma, Yai, the Abbott etc

Ah, Phaya saying that even if hadn't remembered their past lives and past loves, he still would have loved Tharn in this current life, exactlyyyyy that's what I wanna hear

The endless number of times (well, 3) Tharn runs in front of Phaya to protect him

12-4

noo he was taken to the Naga cave and is gonna recover, trust. maybe the Doctor is gonna sacrifice his soul or something to save him, who knows heh

From the flashbacks here and in part 3, I do miss the earlier days when we knew there was Lore but didn't know it yet and they were just cute and such. I very often feel this with paranormal fantasies where the earlier parts of knowing there's something happening but not yet knowing and slowly discovering is my favourite part - when things are simple, yet intriguing

wait I have a question, did Khem die or what? like is he just in the hospital?

Also, Billy in this hospital room looks a bit like Saint?

omg I was like who is that with the long hair but it's Phaya, I guess it has been many months

ah, I was wondering if it'll be 15th days of 11th waxing moon again for Tharn to come home and yeah, guess it's been a whole year fr

man, I wish the meeting again had a bit more fanfare because the despair was done so well, c'mon

Ah, so Doctor didn't die, just gave Tharn his Naga soul to keep him alive but I guess that doesn't kill the Doctor, idk. and he's letting them love each other now

Aw cute but again, anti-climactic and not enough relief, not enough time, not enough emotional impact. I wish they had maybe shown some of Tharn's time there (though that might've taken a bit away from Phaya's desperate situation? idk)

Update: lol I didn't realize there was a little after-credits scene with Saint cameo and season 2 bait

no fr what is that ending, Tharn stayed with Doctor for a year on purpose? and Doctor decided to just get over it? And so Tharn appears all casually over the hill a year later? Seriously needed a stronger ending.

Overall:

I think I liked the first few eps and the potential of the series and the possibilities more than I liked the actual series oof. Since everybody freaking loved this, I also had high expectations.

I just went through the gifs I'd reblogged (I reblogged A Lot cuz I thought I'd end up liking the show more than I ended up liking. went and deleted a bunch bc I was like why did I even reblog this one, what's the point) and I really did like more of the show's gifs from the earlier eps (whereas I enjoyed the analysis and stuff more in the later eps). Don't even feel like reblogging any ep 11 or 12 stuff now though, except maybe the checking under bed sequence. It was also just clear from how invested I was in an episode while watching because in the earlier eps, I was paying more attention and watched an ep in one sitting whereas in the latter half, I would pause in the middle of a section to go on my phone or even just stop watching the ep after a section, do stuff and then come back to finish.

I thought there would be more focus on the romance and fantasy and past lives aspect and less on the cop activity. Like there was no need to spend That much time on the rapist killer case nor Art and Kao's case, we could've spent that time on something like following up on what Lieutenant Tam had learned and the drug case/Tharn's father's case more directly along with more of the actual past lives and fantasy and such. In fact, we got so little about their past lives, I thought there were 4 cycles or something?

I don't know man, I feel like they didn't choose the correct things to show on screen? This sucks because they clearly put in So Much Effort and tried so many new things for BL, so I wish I had loved it more and was more attached.

I think most of the fight scenes and stuff were confusing and not choreographed very well and some interactions/moments/explanations needed to like have more time dedicated to them. However, some moments were just shot/directed so beautifully like ep 11 when grandma is going through the flashbacks of seeing Doctor with Tharn as a child and uni student etc from that single room and ep 12-3 when Phaya wakes up to find Tharn gone, looks under the bed, and the whole sequence after that. (Unfortunate that the reunion scene was so meh).

So many parallels and gifsets of parallels, I keep having to remember my parallels tag is for across different shows while compilation in the tag for same show. I enjoy the parallels and the thought put behind them. It also shows like the cyclical nature of Phaya and Tharn's lives, and it would've been even more impactful if we saw more of their past lives (the original one or the 2 that occurred in the middle apparently).

Highly doubt I'm gonna think of the characters again, I somehow stopped being attached to them about halfway through. Really wanted to give it at least a 7 for trying so many things but don't think it earned it sadly. They tried so many things, as shown in the list of tropes below, but I don't think they satisfyingly merged them or chose the correct things to focus on on-screen.

Running list of tropes: A mix of romance and fantasy lol

Monsters and Cryptids: Sea Monster (naga?), the woman Freen is playing, that tree dude (whatever happened to him? Was that Doctor or something?). Update: the monsters/dieties are the main characters themselves

Police training/cop academy

Murder mystery + a Serial Killer murder mystery + drug ring bust

Tharn seeing the future/people in danger (specifically often seeing Phaya in danger)

Past lives/reincarcation/soulmates

The person Tharn loves will die

Childhood friends (who Tharn gave the locket to). Update: just a fated childhood meeting more like

Does Spin The Bottle count lmao

Love triangle

Lesbians, let's go

Rating: 6/10 [May 12, 2024 Update: Decreased by 0.5 stars when rerating shows I’ve watched in 2024: 6.5 -> 6]

#ep by ep commentary #the sign

[smute]

i was tagged by the wonderful gem gem gemmaaaaaaaaaa @whenwinterfell

1. what do you prefer to be called name-wise?

name-calling? bitch (affectionate) or bro (sarcastic) but jan is also fine

2. when is your birthday?

10 april

3. where do you live?

atm im still enrolled in bremen but i moved back to [redacted] to live with my parents when i started going insane(r) in my dorm room after months of isolation. will probably move to berlin in the fall bc my plans a, b, and c fell through and i dont know what else to do but lets not talk about that 🥲

4. three things you are doing right now?

having a really bad day, drawing on my arm like a child, listening to marina

5. four fandoms that have peaked your interest?

i honestly dont even know what a fandom really is lmao my obsessions with stuff never last long enough to grow into anything substantial

6. how has the pandemic been treating you?

idek how to answer this.... i know im one of the lucky ones and im very grateful, but at the same time im doing worse than ever before... the past 15 months have been hard, a lot has been destroyed and im struggling to look ahead or feel hopeful ✌️😗

7. a song you can’t stop listening to right now?

VENUS FLY TRAP

8. recommend a movie:

Legally Blonde (2001)

9. how old are you?

29 and fuck you for asking (jk lol)

10. school, university, occupation, other?

im about to start an MA in english lit 🤡 and i justify my existence in this capitalist system with 3 separate jobs in 3 diff teams of my uni's pr department (yes its about as adhd friendly as it sounds)

11. do you prefer heat or cold?

COLD!!!! im a sweaty bitch and my skin is a beautiful, delicate shade of raw pork so i really hate the summer. i can admit that the concept has a certain appeal tho

12. name one fact others may not know about you

not really a fact but a fun anecdote: i transferred schools in first grade, just a few months into the school year and, on the first day at my new school, went home with a random girl. apparently sabrina had invited me to hang out, so we went to her house and spent the afternoon watching cartoons and eating candy. we were both latchkey kids (quite common where im from). my mom finished work around noon and obviously shat a brick when she came home to an empty apartment. my parents freaked the fuck out, called everyone they knew and eventually a major police operation was launched within hours of my disappearance... like friends and family were searching all over town for me, police were sweeping fields and the forest next to our neighborhood and 6 year old me was just chilling at this girls house lmaooooo... her mom came home later that night and asked me if my parents knew where i was BECAUSE SHE HAD HEARD A RADIO ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT A MISSING BOY. the weird thing is that sabrina had TWO older sisters who were obviously supposed to watch her (us?) but neither of them had the wherewithal to ask "hmm do the parents of this new kid you dragged in from the street know where he is?"

13. are you shy?

idk man... yeah? but then people keep telling me i come across as an extrovert and outgoing or whatever and i just think to myself omfg? i have to stop overcompensating

14. preferred pronouns?

he/they

15. biggest pet peeves?

"people who chew with their mouth open" <- yes absolutely! and when people interrupt others... which is slightly hypocritical of me but it just drives me up the wall!!!! even when it happens to others and im just a witness it makes me flip my lid

16. what is your favourite “dere” type?

my what now

17. rate your life from 1-10: idk man my brain doesnt really do long term analytics? i find a gummy bear on the floor - its an eleven. i experience a minor inconvenience - i want to kms.

18. what’s your main blog?

this is my only one

19. list your sideblogs and what they’re used for:

i feel like you're not even listening to me

20. is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends?

i guess it takes me a while to warm up to people but once we reach the friendship stage its basically impossible to get rid of me and im very loyal and committed? sounds like a dog lmao. BUT at the same time that can be hard to see for other people bc im also impulsive and not the best when it comes to consistent communication so... dont take it personally when i disappear for a few days and then message u like nothing happened🥺

tagging: @shyredpanda @mmolia ❤️‍🔥

#tag game #moochies

[jackrrabbit]

about me /// 3k follower thanks 💝

ok what in the fuckign—

thanks for 3k followers, guys!!! I actually hit 3k abt a week ago and I was going to make a post about it but I forgot bc of soft sunday lol. I went back to my 1k annnouncement and it was like, a month ago !?!?!?!?!?!?!? which means 2K IN ONE MONTH?? EYE—

y’all horny but.....same. and thank you for thirsting with me!! decided it was time to make a more detailed about me in case any of you are curious about what kind of person is writing this stuff lmao

ABOUT ME

Hello! (≧◡≦) ♡

My name is [redacted], but you can call me Bunny (or sensei if you’re feeling kinky). I’m 20 years old, which is nice because I’m old enough to write porn but young enough to still be excited about adulthood ✨ As of summer 2020 I’m a college senior at a university in California, where I study psychology and law, or “manipulation tactics” as my friends have lovingly dubbed my combination of majors 🤡🤡🤡

I’m a bi woman and I use she/her pronouns! I’m ethnically Indian/Chinese/white & I grew up in the USA. My western zodiac is scorpio ☀️ (surprise surprise), libra 🌙, and capricorn ⬆️; my eastern zodiac is the year of the rabbit 🐇!! My MBTI type is ENFP-T, which is the campaigner I think?? not sure

I like: pink lemonade, west coast sunsets, kissing strangers, skinny dipping in places you’re not supposed to go skinny dipping, ice wine, hiking at night, free samples at farmers markets, and plum trees in bloom 🌸

I dislike: commitment, deadlines, the fact that there’s dairy in everything for no good reason, cleaning up, sitting still, the smell of cigarette smoke, soap operas (altho I still watch them), and Natural Light 🍺

Writing: I’ve basically been writing my whole life, but I started in fandom when I was like 12 with OC x character fanfic (which turned out to be thinly-veiled self insert? a common staple of the FF.net era) and then gave up on it when I couldn’t stay interested ☠️ Re-emerged in fandom after I graduated HS with a 80k word character/character fic that needs about 10k words to the finish line…one of these days I’ll get around to finishing it 🙈 but truly that fic rekindled my love for writing and I’ll always be grateful to it and the entire fandom for making me a better writer 💜💜

And onto the present era…I’ve always been into the kind of stuff I write now (e.g. kink, dubcon, etc.), but I never really knew where to find it bc none of the fandoms I was into had people writing the stuff I wanted to read, until I discovered bnha x reader smut really randomly while I was browsing some kink tag in winter 2019.

Before that, I didn’t understand reader insert & honestly could never get into it, but after going down a rabbit hole of ‘x reader’ smut I was like, hmm, this do be kinda hot? So I watched BNHA, feverishly wrote Sidekick while I was alone for a few weeks over winter break, and thus this blog was made.

On the topic of s*x—I’m an extremely open & sex-positive person and I’m lucky enough to be surrounded by friends who feel the same. We go to kink clubs & lingerie parties together; we text each other pictures of our new sex toys; we have a book club where we read Foucault's History of Sexuality and talk about how sex, repression, and liberation have shaped our lives. Although they don’t know that I write smut about anime characters and post it online, my close friends are well aware that I write “erotica”, and all of them are encouraging and supportive.

If you don’t have friends like that in your life, message me! I would love to be that friend for you, and I’m always down to thirst about a character/situation 🤤

As always, followers are welcome to ask me questions about myself!

#i overshare ok #bunny talks #about me

[rpbetter]

They have made a new account yet again. Raven.

New corvid-based nickname yet? God, I'm so sorry lol that was unnecessarily hostile. I'm just really tired and bitchy today! Though...considering how it's a crime against men and gods to not know anything and everything about Raven, I suppose, that's a valid inquiry.

And that being said; if y'all want to make me aware of that url so I can be sure I never run into them on my RP blog, that'd be fine (seems unfair to just paranoia-block everyone in the RPC with a common ass mun name like that), but I won't post anything with their url. If you drop that or other information that I feel might risk either the reality or the accusation of me sending people to harass them within a message, I'll just screenshot and redact that bit for everyone's safety ;)

But you know what? Good for them. Live your best life, Raven! I sincerely hope that's a fresh start they make the most out of by not doing the same shit. And thank you, for yet again providing evidence for why callouts don't help anyone. Don't know it's you, can't block you.

#vespertine #answered #anonymous #drama cw

[sacarvos]

I don’t really use this blog, obviously, but I’ve been wanting to get this off my chest, as a lot of others have done...

Dumb, rambly stream-of-consciousness garbage likely with a lot of grammatical/spelling errors. Might delete later because I don’t think my musings are really beneficial to anybody haha

I know the “conversation” so to speak is probably mostly all done and over with but I just need to get this out:

I’m sort of unsure on how to feel about the Vinny Vinesauce situation?

Even though the evidence in the doc is spotty, I don’t doubt that there is some truth and validity to it. I sympathize wholeheartedly with the victims.

I think a lot of stuff in the doc (i.e., a shit-ton of personal information about Vinny) should have been redacted/censored for his privacy’s sake. Even just learning about any of it in passing felt... wrong.

Him hooking up with fans is morally questionable for the most part imo because of power imbalances. I’ve heard people defending him and claiming that there’s no such dynamic, however, I’d like to counterpoint that the imbalance is that he has far much more figures backing him up if/when he does something wrong or questionable, in contrast to anybody he may have an issue with who may be just a relatively ordinary person with zero influence and potentially use his own as leverage so as to keep people from speaking up about his wrongdoings. It’s frustrating how it seems as if VS fans are totally ignoring the part in the doc where he considered leaking revenge p*rn of a person if he had to resort to it... People interpreted it as just something he said in the heat of the moment. I honest to god would like to believe that, and I hope that’s the case but... Man, even just him even thinking of the idea and admitting to it is painful enough... I mean I know our internal thoughts don’t necessarily reflect our morals in their entirety but still.. Idk...

I know I’ve been making him out to be a bad person so far but the truth is, I sincerely want to believe that Vinny is just a generally good guy who did stupid things... I don’t blame him for wanting privacy; he probably just could’ve executed it with these hookups far better and kinder than he had.

Admittedly, I still kind of want to watch his streams/videos but would that be wrong of me to do? Would it be putting salt in the wounds of the people he hurt? I haven’t really been able to completely watch any of his recent videos lately because of this lol

Like my brain is doing dumb splitting gymnastics on how I am supposed to feel/think of the situation. I want to be as best as I can and believe what’s right. But here I’m just confused. People should be allowed second chances when they fuck up, right? But that doesn’t invalidate the harm they have done! They still hurt people! But at the same time, none of us are obligated to any of this information! It doesn’t concern us so we don’t have to know!!!

Ugh, I don’t know...

What’s frustrating of all imo though is how the majority of the VS community reacted. A lot of them were outright dismissive of the accusations rather than actually taking some time to examine them and make a decision based on that, and instead came to his defense almost as if solely because they like him and his content. And even though Vinny said not to harass anybody involved, a lot of them did anyway. I thought this community had matured over the years and I was genuinely happy for them, but most fans’ reaction to the situation just proved that wrong...

Ugh, anyway, out of anything to come out of all this, I kind of wish Vinny would apologize to the people he’s hurt. It doesn’t have to be publicly necessarily, but, idk... Just some form of reassurance to where everybody can put this all behind us... It would make my heart rest easy...

#Skelliboy speaks #text heavy #long post #Vinny Vinesauce #Vinesauce #not really all that important; might delete later because who cares lol #it'd be a little reassuring if other people felt the same tho //shrugs #only gonna keep it in the tag for a little bit just in case others wanna talk about it and/or feel the same

[holly-mckenzie]

i'll keep you updated on son yaz! based on today's fragman it already looks like things are coming hahah

i haven't watch dix pour cent but i've also been seeing the [redacted] stuff about feris and i also think they're going that way which is neat i think for feris lol. as for kıraç and beren, i kinda do feel sympathy for him bc yeah this is all his fault but i think he's experienced a lot of character development since the beginning and if he was like how he is now back then then i don't think he would've made the same mistakes. i also don't blame beren bc her entire life is toppling because of her father's mistake and she's (albeit childishly) refusing to blame her father but instead blaming the outsider who changed everything. i think dicle taking care of kıraç is also more just underscoring the entire storyline of dicle being caring no matter what it costs her and it's also more a sign of how their relationship has evolved from episode one.

i'm excited for the whole dicle being a manager thing bc it's definitely going to be super dramatic (although same i don't want dicle to be attacked again but honestly she deserves to be a manager and all emrah did was sabotage everyone else so) and bc technically there's no obstacle for her and barış to date now LMAO

speaking of, I WOULD DIE FOR BARIŞ HAVAS!!!! i'm OBSESSED with his obsession with her hair sgskdb also the fact that he's just there to support her through everything (character depth who? we don't know her) i love him being the loving boyfriend😭😭 and deniz can definitely looks very good in black and white turtlenecks but i loved the green (i would argue that deniz can looks good in everything especially every color turtleneck)

alsooo you have two MA anons now hahah i only sent one of those messages just fyi

I don’t know about the Feris situation. I feel like the story in Dix Pour Cent is so different and is so meaningful partially due to Andrea sexuality + the fact that the way that family is understood is so vague. But hopefully, they are able to give it some meaning and don’t settle for the vague and terrible aspects of Dizi tropes.

I have mixed feelings about Kıraç... Like I understand that he has grown since the start of the season and what not... But I think I am just really tired about how long they extended the secret about Dicle’s parentage... And I know this may seem weird, but I am genuinely on Team Mayda.

As for Beren... I don’t know, because I totally understand what you are saying. However, she is acting incredibly immature, selfish and ignorant of her mother’s feelings. Her mom’s life has literally been ruined by a secret that her step-dad has been keeping and she is still thinking about herself.

If you have read my blog post you might understand why I absolutely hate the fact that Beren (and the narrative) is forgiving to Kıraç for all of the lies. I understand that it is a response to such a scenario, but Beren has consistently been like this since the start of the show. Like, shit Bro had more of a character arc then she has... And its tiring because the actress is talented and they could be doing so much with her story.

It’s true, their relationship has developed and Dicle is such a caring person. I am just jaded... and I kinda stick to what I said. I wish we had seen Kıraç be more proactive in helping his daughters instead of just mopping around. For me, that would have shown more character development because he has repeatedly put himself/his work first and Dicle is always trying to reach out. However, I suppose we see Kıraç accepting Dicle’s help which shows his acceptance for her as his daughter.

Yeah, I agree. I’m excited to see Dicle being an agent and more DicBar. But on that comment about Emrah, this is one of the parts of MA that I am confused by. Each episode of the show is 2+ hours long. They literally do have the time and money to develop other characters (like Emrah or Beren) but they don’t... And it's so surprising because Dix Pour Cent is half that time with fewer episodes and we get more character development. 

Deniz Can is so handsome. Agreed. But I have to agree to disagree with you about the turtle necks. It’s black turtle necks for me.

Wow... I feel like I am collecting MA anons. I shall dub thee MA Anon 1, and the other MA Anon 2. 

#menajerimi ara #anon #asks