#oops I sound repetitive

[mindmeltonabun-blog]

My Demon: Theories and Analysis for Eps 7-8

Hello Readers!

The episodes this week were top-tier! Some quick thoughts I had about this week's eps: Kwang Chul gave a whole new meaning to the phrase, “step on me”. I totally wasn’t expecting this drama to have any blood or gore, but here we are. Did they have to make Gu Won’s stabbing so violent and gruesome?!! Blood was spurting out everywhere! It seriously made me want to vomit.

Other thoughts I had were that all of Madam Ju’s family members should be in prison or at least a mental institution because they're all so freaking crazy. The only good thing about these episodes was that Do Hee and Gu Won finally admitted their true feelings to each other.

I'll try to keep this post as short as possible, but you know me, I still end up writing a shit ton. Anyway, let's take a deeper dive into some of the many mysteries in "My Demon". Time to put on our thinking caps to analyze and theorize!

Demons' Limitations

In Ep 7, we were finally given more information about demons. Specifically, the writer provided us with information about demons' limitations which are quite similar to the limitations of the genie from Aladdin.

For those who don’t remember the rules of Aladdin's Genie, here they are: 

1. Can’t kill anyone 2. Can’t make people fall in love 3. Can’t bring anyone back from the dead

There are some minor differences between the two sets of rules. For instance, instead of the rule that prohibits you from making people fall in love, there are rules against interfering with God's work and preventing natural disasters.

I believe the writer is presenting these rules to suggest that Gu Won will eventually break one of these rules to save Do Hee's life (see the section "What's Best for You is What's Best for Me" for more). Something interesting to note is that Netflix didn't translate the whole page in this scene. There is a part of the text that says, "Killing the living, saving the dead, etc are part of God's domain". This means God is allowed to kill the living, bring back the dead, prevent natural disasters, etc. Basically, God can do all the things demons can't. Seeing this translation also made me realize what God meant when she said "turf" in Ep. 7. I'll further elaborate in the section titled, "God/Lady".

Demons vs Guardians

I'm curious about the differences between demons and guardians. When a demon becomes a guardian, do they acquire a new set of powers? Or does becoming a guardian simply mean they return to being human without additional abilities? Based on the information presented so far, it appears that for a demon to transition into a guardian, they must learn to love and be loved in return. Achieving these milestones would essentially enable them to regain their soul and humanity. It would be cool though if, upon becoming a guardian, demons retained their powers but without an immortal lifespan, similar to Lee Yeon from Tale of the Nine-Tailed!

What Landed Gu Won in Hell? Love

Being a demon is comparable to the life of a genie. In both cases, the individuals are bound to fulfill the desires of others. However, for demons, this servitude isn't a mere obligation--it's a necessity for their continued existence. Unlike genies, demons must grant wishes to sustain their own lives. When I think about it, the life of a demon is quite sad because they have to spend their entire existence granting others' wishes without ever having an opportunity for their own wishes to be fulfilled. This got me thinking about what exactly was Gu Won's greatest desire or wish. Side note, y'all should check out the show Lucifer if you like mystery, devil and human romance, family drama, etc.

Throughout the show, we have witnessed that our deepest wishes and desires, can ironically, lead to our demise, sending us straight to Hell, where we are tormented by these very wishes. Take for example, Park Bok Gyu's wish to never go hungry. After he died, he was tortured by creatures with fish heads. Conversely, the mob boss, who sought wealth and power, faces a fate in Hell that, according to Gu Won, would be even more severe. These examples show us the larger the wish, the steeper the cost--meaning that if your wish is significantly large, your soul could end up in far worse places than Hell. But what's worse than even the deepest levels of Hell? Becoming a demon. Unlike in Hell, where you could finish your punishment more quickly and be reincarnated, being turned into a demon means becoming a slave for all of eternity. All hope isn't lost though because as I mentioned earlier, if you learn to love and be loved returned, you can be free of your demon existence.

I'll now provide you with what I think Gu Won's wishes were and the circumstances surrounding his transformation into a demon! Let me just say that Gu Won's wishes were astronomical. They weren't common wishes like wealth or power which would be easily granted by demons. They were wishes only God could grant.

(DISCLAIMER: DO NOT PLAGIARIZE MY THEORIES, I BETTER NOT BE SEEING MY THEORIES ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORM WITHOUT CREDIT).

So, Do Hee and Gu Won were in love, but their societal positions created significant barriers. Being a kisaeng and a nobleman, they faced the harsh reality their love could not flourish in that lifetime. Now, Do Hee was forced to work as a kisaeng to provide for her family.

Due to Do Hee's status as a kisaeng, she was either sold off to someone else or, in an alternative scenario, their forbidden love led to her tragic death (who knows, maybe Jin Star's past self killed Do Hee in a fit of jealousy; maybe they were sisters?). In either situation, Gu Won would've felt a profound sense of insignificance and weakness, unable to protect Do Hee from these tragic fates. Like he must've really hated himself.

In his pit of despair, Gu Won wished he could've saved Do Hee from her enslaved position as a kisaeng or untimely death, protected her, and married her one day. Now, those are some big wishes, and remember what I said? The bigger the wish, the larger the cost. In a twist of fate, God/Lady heard Gu Won's fervent wishes and offered Gu Won a deal. God would fulfill all of Gu Won's wishes if he agreed to work as a demon.

Sometime after this, Do Hee found out Gu Won became a demon because of her and felt immense guilt. Do Hee who was a devout Christian, prayed to God wishing Gu Won would be spared from suffering such an existence as a demon. Now, God mostly fulfilled this request by erasing Gu Won's human memories (I'm going with the Grim Reaper/oblivion tea theme here haha). Since Gu Won's inability to protect Do Hee tortured him deeply, the act of forgetting lessened his emotional pain. I say mostly because God wasn't quite done with fulfilling this request.

Just imagine being God, you would have to shuffle so many things around to fulfill both Do Hee and Gu Won's wishes. Make Do Hee rich so she's not working in a slave position...check...create a situation where the two would meet (i.e matchmaker got the hotel name wrong)...check...create a situation where the two would have to depend on each other (i.e shut off Gu Won's power on the road)...check..... make them get married..check and check.....free Gu Won from his existence as a demon...ongoing. IT'S A LOT Y'ALL.

How do you save Gu Won from a sad existence as a demon and spontaneous combustion? You turn him back into a human by introducing him to the very girl who would be capable of bringing out his humanity through her love. She's the water that extinguishes the Hellfire that is about to consume him. Gu Won freed Do Hee from being an enslaved kisaeng in the past and now she's freeing him from the shackles of his enslaved existence as a demon.

Gu Won and Do Hee are each other's salvation. One cannot survive without the other. If one is killed, the other one will be too. For example, if Do Hee dies, Gu Won would either be stuck as a demon for all of eternity or combust. And if Gu Won dies, it would leave Do Hee unprotected and she would probably get killed. It's like Do Hee said, they share the same fate and are in the same boat.

What’s Best for You is What’s Best for Me...Danger on the Horizon!

On the surface, the quote "What's best for you is what's best for me", said by Madam Ju and echoed by Gu Won may seem sweet, but upon deeper reflection, it reveals a bitter truth: what's best for you is not always what's best for me.

A brief digression: I have a suspicion that Gu Won might be a long-lost ancestor of the Ju family. Why would the writer intentionally give Gu Won similar personality traits as Madam Ju or have him repeat things she said if not to suggest there was a possible familial connection? While shared traits don't always indicate a blood relation, the repetition of the same phrases is highly suspicious. I guess one reason the writer did this was to convey that even though Madam Ju was gone, Do Hee would still have someone similar by her side. However, they could've accomplished this without having Gu Won be the male version of Madam Ju.

Another explanation for why Gu Won and Madam Ju say the same phrases could be that they crossed paths in the past. Maybe Madam Ju heard Gu Won say it or vice versa. Who knows. It would be sweet though if Gu Won were a long-lost Ju family member because then Do Hee would be related to Madam Ju through her marriage to him.

Ok, sorry for the brief tangent, it's my ADHD brain haha. Now, let's get back to discussing how what's best for you is not always what's best for me. Taking the example of the mother and her sick daughter, from the mother's perspective, signing away her soul to ensure her daughter's health might seem like the best thing to do for her daughter. Yet, it wouldn't be truly best for the mother as she would be damned to Hell. Similarly, from the daughter's POV, what's technically best for her (i.e not being sick anymore), wouldn't actually be the best, as she would be fraught with guilt knowing her mother suffered because of her.

When it comes to Do Hee and Gu Won, what's best for Do Hee is to continue investigating the deaths of her parents and Madam Ju. However, this poses a significant risk to Gu Won, who is almost fully human now and no longer invincible.

This leads me to my next point. Gu Won would stop at nothing to ensure Do Hee's happiness. He's well aware that for Do Hee to continue her investigations, she would need to remain alive and safe. For that to happen, he would need to have his powers fully working so he could protect her. What this means is that Gu Won will become a full demon again. I believe this is about to happen soon because, in Ep 8, we see God/Lady looking at the moon which is now a "waxing gibbous". If you recall from Ep 2, Park Bok Gyu hypothesized that they would have to wait until the next full moon to attempt transferring the tattoo back to Gu Won so he could be a demon again. And well, the next phase after a waxing gibbous is a full moon.

I think Gu Won isn't going to tell Do Hee about his decision to become a demon though. He's going to take Do Hee to the beach and make her think it's a romantic outing and she's not going to suspect anything because they’re in a relationship now. Then bam into the water they go! The betrayal she'll feel after Gu Won does this will be astronomical. It goes back to Madam Ju's quote about having someone on your side who, if they stabbed you in the back, you would understand. Even if Do Hee understands why Gu Won did this, it still wouldn't change the fact it would still hurt like Hell.

Would Gu Won doing this be really what's best for Do Hee? Or the both of them? Yes and no. While it would keep Do Hee alive and safe, she would be riddled with guilt knowing Gu Won sacrificed his soul and humanity to ensure she was protected. At the same time, Gu Won would become immortal again and able to protect Do Hee better, but he would no longer be able to feel love for her since demons are devoided of human emotions. Gu Won would simply view her as someone he just needs to protect to keep his end of the bargain.

Following this, I think there will be a situation where either Kwang Chul or Abraxas gets ahold of Do Hee and I think this is where Gu Won’s latest dream will come into play. To save Do Hee, Gu Won will have to kill whoever, and this will force him to break the rule that states demons can't kill. Subsequently, he'll spontaneously combust. Well, that's going to suck. Had Gu Won remained human, he could've killed whoever and not spontaneously combust. However, since he's a demon again, those consequences would apply. Don't worry y'all, I feel like Do Hee is going to wish or pray to God/Lady that she'll take pity on them and bring Gu Won back to life lol.

Abraxas..It's Still Seok Hoon

So earlier this week, I posted on Twitter how I now thought Abraxas was Seok Min or Do Gyeong based on the pillows. However, after thinking through some more things, I'm going back to saying Abraxas is Seok Hoon. That's my final answer.

Seok Hoon is a trickster/magician! He makes things "disappear" including money and people. That's why Madam Ju said in Ep 4, "You killed someone on top of all your dirty tricks?". He even suggested Do Hee let his department buy shares of her company to offset their losses which is a form of trickery since it would appear Do Hee was engaging in stock manipulation or insider trading.

The biggest trick Seok Hoon is attempting to pull on Do Hee is to make her believe he's really on her side and that he's her real guardian. Going back to Madam Ju's quote about having someone on your side means you would gladly let them stab you in the back and understand. When you trust someone completely, it means you would let them stab you in the back because at the end of the day you know they have your best interest at heart so you would understand.

Throughout this show, the writer has made it a point to emphasize how Seok Hoon is the only one on Do Hee's side. Here's the thing though, Do Hee doesn't completely trust Seok Hoon as evidenced by how she doesn't tell him everything. The same goes for Gu Won, but he's not a suspect in the death of Madam Ju.

Between the two men in the show, who do you think is the real demon and guardian? Btw, Abraxas is sometimes seen as a demon in mythology. For me, the real demon is Seok Hoon. Even though Gu Won projects an image that he's a big bad demon, he's actually an angel on the inside. In contrast, Seok Hoon projects an angelic persona, but he's really a devil on the inside. Gu Won is the real guardian who's trying to protect Do-Hee while Seok Hoon is the real demon who's trying to kill her.

One major question I had from earlier episodes was how Abraxas/Seok Hoon knew the identity of Gu Won was the Director of Sunwol Foundation before the wedding news articles came out that said as much? Furthermore, how did Seok Hoon know the Wild Dogs were looking for him? If you remember, the Wild Dogs only found out Gu Won was the Director of Sunwol and Do Hee's bodyguard after Kwang Chul passed the note revealing as much. There was no explanation of just how exactly Seok Hoon and Kwang Chul found out Gu Won was the director of Sunwol and that the Wild Dogs were looking for him. I looked through earlier eps to see if there was ever an instance where Do Hee told Seok Hoon that Gu Won was the Director of Sunwol, but there wasn't. I think Seok Hoon probably found out this bit of info from Secretary Shin. She probably mentioned it in passing to Seok Hoon because she thought Seok Hoon was Do Hee's ally.

I'm sure many of you are probably wondering how Seok Hoon can be Abraxas when we see Abraxas chilling at Seok Min's home. Well, the thing is, we haven't seen Seok Hoon's place for a reason--he doesn't have one. Due to his "hippie" lifestyle, he engages in communal living, meaning he lives with relatives. More specifically, he resides at Seok Min's home, and that's why we see him as Abraxas there. There's a strong possibility that he and Seok Min are probably working together too. Additionally, I'm ruling out Do Gyeong as being Abraxas because I think he's trying to help warn Do Hee in his own creepy way. When it comes to the pill switching of Madam Ju's medications, I suspect Se-ra may have some involvement. According to the info on SBS, Se-ra is the daughter of a leading pharma company. As someone with a background in pharma, I was like wait a minute. While I'm not sure about the rules and regulations in South Korea, in the US, diclofenac is a prescription medication. I'm just going to guess it's the same in SK. This led me to think that maybe Se-ra provided the diclofenac to Seok Hoon.

In Ep 7, Abraxas/Seok Hoon informed Kwang Chul that Gu Won was only a demon when he was around Do Hee. This revelation led the duo to believe Gu Won's access to his powers was somehow linked to his proximity to Do Hee (they just didn't know how close). To test this hypothesis, they decided to separate the two lovers so that they could eliminate Gu Won. When this plan failed, they went back to the drawing board. At this point, the duo remained unaware of the tattoo and its connection to Do Hee and Gu Won's powers because there was nothing in the book about the tattoo transferring or how to get it back. I wouldn't be surprised if the book didn't even say how the tattoo was connected to demon powers.

It was only after Seok Hoon saw Do Hee place Gu Won's hand on her wrist with the tattoo that he realized the connection between the tattoo and Gu Won's demon powers. This is going to be important further down the line.

After realizing this, Seok Hoon messaged Kwang Chul, saying, "There's something wrong with his powers." Although not explicitly shown on screen, I believe Seok Hoon knew precisely what was wrong with Gu Won's powers. He deduced Gu Won was becoming human through Do Hee's love. This is why Seok Hoon chose to tell Gu Won he was the reason why Do Hee was giving up the Chairwoman position and investigation of Madam Ju's death. Seok Hoon strategically revealed this information to Gu Won with the intention it would encourage him to pursue a relationship with Do Hee, ultimately leading to Gu Won becoming fully human through her love. If Gu Won were fully human, he wouldn't have the powers to protect Do Hee, making them both sitting ducks for slaughter.

Seok Hoon's little plan is going to backfire, though, for two main reasons: He doesn't know one can get the tattoo back and he doesn't understand the power of love. Remember, the book doesn't tell us how one gets the tattoo back. Bok Gyu and Gu Won are the only ones who know this bit of information because they figured out the conditions (i.e full moon and ocean) had to be the same as the night the tattoo was initially transferred. Furthermore, Seok Hoon doesn't know the lengths Gu Won would go to protect Do Hee. He doesn't understand that Gu Won would essentially sell his soul and humanity to protect Do Hee (Gu Won's already done it once before in past), meaning he would become a demon again to protect Do Hee.

God/Lady

I don't know about y'all, but I'm quite frankly done with God in disguise figures in fantasy dramas. It's like in every single fantasy drama, there's always a God in disguise character that gives you hints of what will happen in the form of riddles, leaving many scratching their heads to figure out what they mean. We have seen these types of characters in Goblin, Tale of the Nine-Tailed, King Eternal Monarch, Doom at Your Service, Alchemy of Souls, etc. The list is endless.

The latest God in disguise is Lady... who goes around saving "recyclables", more like saving people. Anyway, I've seen many questioning if she’s really God. Y’all if she’s wearing a hat that spells out G-O-D in bold letters and she’s always asking money for Jesus Corporation, what does that tell you??? I don’t know how much clearer it can be that she is God. Instead of questioning whether she is God or not, maybe it would be a better use of our time if we spend it trying to decipher what she says instead.

Let's get to dissecting the many things God has said. Now, I've already gone over most of the things she said from Ep 1-6 either in the previous post or on my Twitter act so I won't really discuss more here. However, the are a couple things I forgot to mention in my last post though. Here they are:

The roulette wheel has 18 odd and 18 even numbers (36 numbers total). (18) 1+8=9 and (36) 3+6=9 all correspond to Gu (9) Won. The sum of all the numbers (0-36) on the roulette wheel is "666" which I already said in the previous post is the number of the beast/devil and corresponds to Gu Won (the combination to his safe is 666). When you flip “666” it’s “999” which is an angel number that symbolizes completion and new beginnings.

In "Divine Comedy", there are 9 realms of Hell + 1 with Lucifer = 10. The same pattern is present in Purgatory and Heaven. Gu Won's soul was in Hell and now it's in the purgatory on its way towards Heaven. Demon-> Guardian. Hell-> Heaven

On a broader level, if 1= new beginning and 0= end, our couple who's represented by the number 10 symbolizes they are each other's end and beginning. They complete each other.

The bill God is holding when she's saying, "I'm betting all my money on the odd numbers", is a 1000 bill. 1000 or "cheon" means "heaven". That scene could be intrepreted as God or the heavens are betting everything on our couple to win. Also, Madam Ju's first name is Cheon which probably means she went to heaven.

The overall conclusion I'm drawing from what God said about odd numbers from eps 1-6 is that our couple will have a happy ending after they go through some shit haha.

Moving onto what God said in Eps 7-8! When Gu Won called God/Lady, "Arabica woman", my mind lit up! Does anyone see the connection? Arabica...Abraxas. Abraxas is 7 letters and Arabica is 7 letters. In some belief systems, Abraxas was viewed as God. So, Gu Won calling her "Arabica woman" could be another hint she's God. The word "Arabica" also sounds very similar to "Abracadabra" which is related to Abraxas. Just so we’re clear, I’m not implying God/Lady is the Abraxas who’s trying to kill Gu Won and Do Hee. Seok Hoon is a wannabe Abraxas while God/Lady is the real Abraxas haha.

I also found it hilarious that God was constantly begging for donations for Jesus Corporation. It made me think about that time Madam Ju said she bribed God through donations after Do Hee said liars can't go to Heaven. Guess Madam Ju bribed God enough to earn a spot in Heaven.

When God says she knows this place like the back of her hand, she doesn't mean the train station, she means the whole world...because you know, God is omnipresent. God then tells them, they've intruded on her "turf" which means they've intruded on her domain.

What's her domain? Matters of life, death, natural disasters, fate, making people fall in love, etc. This was why Gu Won's powers would fail at the most random times or rather not-so-random times. God already has a grand plan for these two and she's keeping up her end of the bargain of the contract she made with them in the past (refer to "What Landed Gu Won in Hell? Love" section). However, these two would interrupt her work so she would shut off Gu Won's powers so that they follow the predetermined path she has planned for them.

Gu Won's power failed in Ep 1 because God was creating a situation where they would depend on each other, get to know each other, fall in love, etc. In the latest power failure, God turned off Gu Won's powers to prevent them from escaping so they could kiss each other. Consider this scenario: If God hadn't prevented them from escaping, what would've happened? They wouldn't have kissed. That kiss set the wheels in motion for the romance between Gu Won and Do Hee. God was just giving them a nudge in the right direction.

The next time Gu Won experienced another power failure was later in Ep 7 when he and Do Hee were attempting to leave Sunwol Foundation. Once again, we should question why God didn't want them to leave at that particular moment. Remember, because Gu Won and Do Hee were unable to leave precisely at that time, they encountered the Wild Dogs, who then proceeded to pledged their allegiance to Gu Won. Based on Ep 9 preview, it appears the Wild Dogs will play a crucial role in finding Kwang Chul.

As Gu Won and Do Hee were leaving, we saw God telling them, "What flickers would eventually go out sooner or later". Many interpreted this scene as God saying Gu Won's powers would eventually go out. Well, duh. I interpreted this scene a bit differently because I noticed God was looking at the clock that was flickering and pointing at 1.

What does 1 symbolize in numerology? New beginning. My interpretation was that she was saying Gu Won's life as a demon along with his powers was coming to an end and that he was about to begin a new life as a human.

Gu Won should really be nicer to God lol. Look at what happened to the Prince from Beauty and the Beast after he wasn't nice to the old beggar lady...she turned him into a beast. Ohhh now I get it....Gu Won needs to learn to love or he'll remain a beast forever aka he'll remain a devil/demon forever haha (666=beast=devil).

Later in the episode, one guy advises the other to let it go and blame it on fate. This refers to an earlier scene where Gu Won was blaming Do Hee (Fate) for losing his powers. God's message is clear--Gu Won shouldn't be blaming Do Hee for his current state; rather, he should be blaming himself. After all, it's not her fault that he's falling in love with her and becoming human. Moreover, there's the possibility that becoming human was one of Gu Won's original wishes in the contract he signed with God.

In Ep 8, we don't see much of God except in the beginning. Many interpreted what God said in the following scene as meaning Do Hee had special powers that allowed her to heal Gu Won. However, I don't believe she possesses any supernatural abilities. Instead, I think she saved him through the power of love, and, perhaps prayers. If you look at the end of Ep 7, you'll notice Do Hee's hands were in a prayer position right before they zoomed in on the cross tattoo. Do Hee likely wished and prayed for Gu Won's salvation, and God granted it.

Regarding the second thing God said, I believe she was referring to the moment when Do Hee was trying to save Gu Won. Seok Hoon witnessed Do Hee placing Gu Won's hand on her wrist, setting off a chain of events that would eventually threaten her life (refer to "Abraxas...It's Still Seok Hoon" section).

Tarot

Whew! We are almost near the end of this post! There wasn't really anything of significance in terms of tarot in this week's episodes. One thing I found interesting was that the social influencer had asked Gu Won if he was a magician. For those who don't know, the 1st tarot card is "The Magician". You can make multiple connections between that, the number 1, and Gu Won, but since I'm tired of writing, I won't be further elaborating on it. I think we'll see a situation in the future where everyone really thinks Gu Won is dead, but he'll show up very unexpectedly and say "Abracadabra, I'm back!".

One last thing I found interesting was the tarot card pulled by Jung Mi in Ep 8. She had pulled the 19th tarot card, which is the Sun. This card usually indicates success, good fortune, happiness, etc. Also, 1+9=10 and Yi Sun...Sun haha. I think this card conveys the same message that everything will be okay after we go through some Hell.

I bet you all that we'll be seeing the following tarot cards in future eps: #1 The Magician, #8 Strength, #11 Justice, #12 The Hanged Man, #13 Death, #16 The Tower, #18 The Moon, and #21 The World!

Other Random Thoughts

Gu Won and Do Hee's red and green didn't refer to Christmas or Battery Charge Status. They referred to the colors on the roulette wheel. There is only one green space on a typical roulette wheel and it corresponds to the number 0. Number 1 is usually red. So 1...0....10 and 1+0=1 completion. Also, odd numbers are usually red and even numbers are black. Oh, I get why Do Hee was wearing a red dress and Gu Won was wearing a black suit now haha.

What determines if one remembers their past lives or not? Why is Park Bok Gyu the only one who remembers his past lives? Will Do Hee ever remember her past lives?

I can't believe Park Bok Gyu compared Gu Won to being a meat eater who ended up becoming a vegetarian because he met a very special pig (Do Hee) that he didn't want to eat haha.

With Madam Ju, is she suppose to be a spirit in limbo or is Do Hee schizophrenic? In Ep 8, it almost feels like she’s a real ghost bc we see her tapping her cane in hesitation after Do Hee said she didn’t know who killed Madam Ju and her parents.

I hope the Wild Dogs or Park Bok Gyu will find the bug underneath Gu Won’s desk when they’re cleaning haha. Did Seok Hoon put bugs in Do Hee’s place?!!

Was Gu Won a prince when he was human?

Do Hee’s birthday is Oct 29 (look at her phone in ep 1) which means she is a scorpio. On the SBS site, it tells about the story of the frog and scorpion. In the story, the scorpion stings the frog who’s carrying it across the river. They both end up dying and the scorpion is basically like oops it’s just in my nature to. Also, on the lovers tarot card (Rider Waite deck), there is a snake which equates to the 8th zodiac sign…scorpio! The other zodiac sign on the lovers tarot card is a lion which means Leo (5th zodiac sign). I guess Gu Won’s zodiac sign is Leo. This would also explain why he likes those lion bookends haha. Oh and lions are considered “apex predators” haha. Leo’s element is fire and Scorpio is water….hahaha Fire and Water…Gu Won and Do Hee. In most tarot decks, the 8th tarot card is justice. In the Rider Waite deck, the 8th card is strength which shows a lion.

The kiss scene with the garden backdrop looks like the lovers tarot card where Adam and Eve are in the garden of Eden. I can totally see people start making theories about how Do Hee is Eve and Gu Won is Adam after reading this post 🤣. And talk about “original sin” and “forbidden fruit”. Good luck haha.

Number 15 is associated with the devil tarot card as well as the full moon (the full moon comes 15 days after the new moon).

One other theory I had for Gu Won and Do Hee was that in the past, they were in so love that it became detrimental to everyone around them. Gu Won was a rule breaker and instead of doing whatever job he was suppose to do (I.e work as a government official), he was always going around “flower watching” aka hanging out with Do Hee. Him and Do Hee forgot about their responsibilities so God punished them. Gu Won’s punishment was to be turned into a demon so he could learn to follow the rules (Gu Won did say the demon manual was a book filled with many threats haha). For Do Hee, maybe her punishment was to always be alone, meaning she would always lose those closest to her. I feel this theory is just meh haha. The other theory aligns more with the many themes in the show than this one. I would be surprised if the writer goes this route haha.

END

Overall, I don't think we'll have a sad ending. I'll definitely let y'all know if I see anything in future eps that would indicate otherwise! I hope in this week's eps, we'll get to see what actually happened in Gu Won and Do Hee's past! I'm dying to know the circumstances that led to Gu Won's transformation into a demon! Alright, that's all I have for now!

#my demon #gu won #do do hee #do dohee #jeong gu won #kim yoojung #song kang #tarot cards #there are probably grammatical mistakes #oops I sound repetitive

[pascalssbabyy]

The Accidental Solution

Pairing: Jackson!Joel Miller x F!Reader

Rating: 18+ Explicit

Word Count: 17.1k (wtf am I okay?!)

Summary: Joel accidentally walks in on you naked when you’re fresh out of the shower. The situation as you expected leaves questions in the air and Joel to avoid you as much as he can. That’s until you decide to take matters into your own hands.

Warnings: 18+ SMUT, no use of Y/N, age gap (Joel is 52 but age of reader is not specified), friends to lovers, plot of how Joel and reader met, description of readers body but again not that specific, sub!Joel, insecure!Joel (he just needs some lovin), but also mean!Joel, Joel gets called a good boy (oops?), pet names, dirty talking, M!masturbation, Joel having filthy thoughts 💭, blowjob, fingering, P in V, unprotected sex (don’t be naughty!), creampie.

Okay listen, I don’t know how the hell this turned into a 17k fic but here we are 🤦🏻‍♀️ why do I have to be someone who has to write in so much detail (because shit this took me ages 😭) anyway… I hope enjoy 🤣 and let me know what you think! Thank you all for being so patient with me as I know it’s been a while! 🥹

Taglist: @harriedandharassed @mumma-moonchild @chyannealaniz @millercontracting 🤍

Warm water cascades down your bare back and shoulders as the heat begins to unravel all those aches and tight knots in your worn-out muscles. You can slowly feel your body letting loose from the long day you’ve just endured; the lengthy walks, the cold nights, the tense stretch felt in the soles of your feet swiftly easing from the water pooling on the shower floor. The steam starts to travel up, surrounding the enclosed walls and clearing up your sinuses. You can smell the freshness of your shampoo and conditioner, the floral scent giving you that comforting feeling of finally being back in the familiarity and safety of your own home. You lather all your products in between your fingers and palms, rubbing them deep into your scalp and across your body, your fingertips massaging the headache and ringing in your ears.

You’re happy to be home. Eyes observing the clock and knowing before your shift even started that patrol this time would be a long one; abruptly waking up at dawn to the repetitive sound of beeping coming from your alarm on your bedside table, tired eyes failing to adjust to the sun rising through the split of your curtains and fighting to pull yourself out of the warmth of your covers. Mornings were always a struggle for you. Attempting to get through your morning routine, having breakfast and quickly getting ready for the day. Your shift goes by smoothly which you’re thankful for, but once it’s over it seems to remind you that you’re returning home to another day gone so soon, your walk back home filled with empty streets and dark skies.

🍃🍃 A few months ago 🍃🍃

You knew Tommy was hesitant at first glance when you’d offered him an extra set of hands with patrol duty. His wide eyes and furrowed brows peering down at you, displaying nothing but a face full of determination and so much willingness. His reaction didn’t surprise you and never bothered you in the slightest, already expecting that certain response from people and knowing exactly why.

You were young; soft in personality and had a pure heart, always being able to see the good in all people. You weren’t someone who belonged within the dangers that surrounded the outskirts of Jackson, and it was rare for someone who’d been in a world that held endangerment and risk to still have that positive outlook on it. But that wasn’t all that you were. You were also devoted and strong-willed, knowledgeable of outside life and full of eagerness, so it didn’t take long to prove to Tommy that you were just what he needed to get the job done.

You were dedicated, fast on your feet and capable of doing and making any necessary decisions to help others you worked with. After a few shifts, you began to notice how the rest of the team started to warm up to you, considering you were still fairly new and just making your way around the ins and outs of the job. Apart from this, everyone who you worked with was kind, respectful and you were able to make a few friendships along the way with a different range of people.

That’s what you enjoyed about the job, how effortless it was for you to get on with the community, and how welcoming they were to any newcomer.

Of course you knew you’d come across certain situations that would have you questioning yourself; how could it be dealt with. How to get around it as efficiently and effectively as you could make it. You were ready for that moment to arise, but what you didn’t expect was that this was first coming your way in the shape of a man. Tommy’s older brother in fact.

And his name was Joel Miller.

You’d heard the name, the way it was whispered around town, eyes unable to look away when said person was nearby. Tommy had mentioned his brother a few times around you, whether it was in meetings or general conversations, and what you had gathered so far was that Joel had been new to Jackson for just a few weeks when he started patrolling, barely having time to settle down in the new environment and heading straight to protecting the people of the town. It didn’t surprise you that Joel was immediately giving himself a persona of negativity and dislike, being a hard man to please and someone who had no intention of getting to know people apart from the obvious; Tommy, Marie and Ellie. He was intimidating, vague and held a stern facial expression that had everyone stepping back.

You knew it was coming. Joel had made his way around certain shifts with different people who’d found it difficult to break him out of his hard, concealed character. So when Tommy mentioned that your next shift was with someone who you hadn’t yet worked with, it didn’t take you long to know exactly who that person was going to be.

Tommy meets up with you before your shift starts, expecting that if he somehow warns you about Joel first, it’ll make the situation less tense. “You see my brother…,” he lets out a deep sigh, “he’s…he’s a complicated man. He’s not one for talking or getting to know people.” You can see Tommy wince slightly at his own words, having a picture already drawn up in his head with how this’ll go.

“I just wanna try one shift with you. To see what he’s like.”

You weren’t someone to say no, conscious that Tommy was already having a hard time getting his brother to ease up to people. You give him a reassuring smile and nod at his request, and happy in yourself that you receive a smile back, his stance now not as tense and face softening at your reply.

Everyone you’d worked with so far had been fine, shifts running in order, so you thought surely he’s not that bad.

To your surprise, it’s worse than bad. It’s just unwelcoming.

The first time Tommy introduced Joel to you he didn’t even bother to shake your hand, small arm outstretched ready to finally meet the man whose name had been on your mind since you’d heard it. The way he’d take a glance at you and just grunt when you told him your name, with that simple look of unimpressed planted across his features. Joel knew he didn’t have to mention his own, certain that he was already known around the people of Jackson. What was even worse than his rude posture and not-so-open welcome was that he had very little vocabulary and a miner attitude in having any sort of conversation, just simply having no interest in others and just wanting to get on with things without distractions.

Even with his not-so-keen introduction, his ways of communicating should take you back, upset you in some way or maybe even annoy you. That’s what you expected from yourself but somehow it did the exact opposite. Yes, he was rude but you knew behind that harsh exterior held someone who’d just been through a lot, done things he knew were wrong but for reasons he knew deep down was right. His eyes held a lot of his true self. They were a dark brown colour but were so soft, eyes you could get lost in if you looked in them for too long. They were so different in comparison to how he showed his persona, how he stood his ground.

So when you’d mentioned to Tommy that you didn’t mind having more shifts with his brother he seemed taken aback. “You sure?” he says, tone high and dubious, “I don’t want you sayin’ that just cause of what is said—”

“Tommy…,“ you console him before he can get you rethinking your decision, giving him a light chuckle. “I’m sure. I’m more than happy to have him around more. Wasn’t as bad as I thought he’d be.”

You can see that Tommy’s grateful, going through certain shift plans with you and letting you know which ones you and Joel will be paired on together.

You can feel the butterflies flutter in your lower stomach, an unknown feeling tickling its way up your spine. Could it be nervousness? Maybe doubt? Or perhaps you’re feeling sceptical about your abilities to change the way Joel perceives you.

Or maybe, just maybe, deep within yourself, that feeling you felt was excitement.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

You and Tommy had agreed on a few shifts a week working with his brother, just to see how you’d both get on with one another. Tommy demanded updates from you every time you got back from patrol and each time, the feedback became more positive; the shifts not being as awkward or dealing with Joel’s quiet moods, his negative attitude.

He starts to become more at ease with your presence. You begin to see more of what you knew he wanted people to see, to understand.

You liked how with each minor conversation you had with him they’d become longer, talking back and forth about everything and anything you could get out of him. His replies back now came from a place of interest, wanting to let out any built-up resentment or just wanting to talk about the little things.

Of course, he was adamant about you in the beginning, but what you began to realise was that Joel was someone who needed time and patience. Time to trust and accept you and others around him. That people weren’t there to be his enemy, they were there to show him that Jackson was good and that he was in a community that would keep him and Ellie safe.

You started to like having him around, warmth building in your chest when you’d look at the patrol board and see his name right next to yours, even when you knew already that you were on shift together. The more he opened himself up to you the more you craved his company. You’d never met anyone like him, so it didn’t seem to shock you that you’d started to see him in a different light.

It hadn’t taken long for your feelings to develop into a minor crush, subtly taking longer glances at him when he wasn’t looking, heart pumping out your chest when you’d make him smile or chuckle at something you said. You were aware that he wasn’t like this with many people, being so open the way he was, and the thought had you blushing.

You’d take time to admire all his frame; his wide shoulders, his broad arms hidden in his thick coat, mind picturing what he’d look like without any fabric covering his physique. Even in the cold weather, his skin was tanned in colour, his hands large and fingers thick. His hair was scattered in salt and pepper strands, with tight curls that rested atop his furry collar. You’d wonder what it’ll be like to run your hands through them, to even tug on them, him wincing at the pull as you cover your lips around his neck and jaw.

His nose framed his face, soft brown eyes and a scattering of wrinkles around his temples and forehead. Fuck he was attractive, and the in-depth staring started to become a continuous reminder that Joel was a man much older than you, which only made you like him that much more.

You struggled to conceal the hidden desire that shivered up your back when he told you his age, “uh…I’m 52. Been doin’ this for a long time… N’too damn long if y’ask me.” You give him a short and sweet reply, too afraid your voice would give you away with how badly it turned you on.

Fuck you definitely shouldn’t be attracted to someone twice your age.

It comes to into full effect when he starts calling you certain names; every once in a while, a darlin’ or sweetheart leaves his carefree lips when he asks you for a favour, or when he initiates a certain change of plan when necessary. The words glided off his southern tongue so smoothly, having to clench your thighs together to ease the ache you felt for him.

He had changed every single aspect of your thoughts. Wondering what he would be like if he’d give himself a chance to feel. To give himself a moment of vulnerability. Was it something that he’d even allow himself to have? To drop his guard down just a little and delve into that part of him that maybe he hadn’t felt in a long time.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

Joel wasn’t someone for getting too close to people.

It had been that way for him for as long as he could remember, and he knew it was selfish, but that’s the way he wanted it.

And it was so easy for Joel, not to feel. To not be someone whose emotions got in the way of everything. To be a person who was closed off and shut down that part of himself that made him feel anything other than his own protection. This meant he’d never get hurt, even if it meant damaging people in the process.

It was until he’d become acquainted with you, he’d question everything he’d set his mind to.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

Joel doesn’t remember the last time he’d felt so intimidated by someone. He was shocked at how quickly it had taken you to become confident around him straight from the get-go. You were keen to show him how knowledgeable you were, how you’d face any problem with intelligence and no trouble. And he hated to admit it, but he liked how ahead of the game you were, how you took everything on with attentiveness.

It had been a long time since Joel had met someone like you.

He’d never let you know this. Joel was too proud and stubborn to admit that you had challenged him first-hand and that you’d started to make him question his ability to be someone who’d work better on their own.

The more shifts the both of you were on together and being within each other’s company, Joel had noticed his shoulders weren’t as tense as they’d usually be. His body became less formal and opened up to your company and the warmth that radiated off of you. He liked how you brought out that side of him that he thought had disappeared. It was even rare that at certain points in the shifts your humour and wit would catch him, small and subtle chuckles escaping deep in his chest.

You had fire and you were headstrong, determined to get him to let go of that rough ego and just be himself around you, which Joel initially though he’d hate, but it didn’t take long for him to privately crave the attention you gave him.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

A few months into patrolling, Tommy had set you and Joel up as official partners.

Your constructive feedback at the end of each shift had Tommy already making the clear decision to pair you both up permanently.

Even noticing himself how well you were getting on with his brother, and how you both thought it would be the best option for him. To stay with someone who he knew he got on with. To Joel’s surprise he didn’t mind, knowing that you worked well together and got on with the job quickly and efficiently.

Throughout the months of getting to know each other, the relationship between you two had developed into something much more than work colleagues and had eventually made its way out of patrol hours. On a whim, you’d asked Joel if he wanted to grab a drink with you after one shift you had together which was rougher than usual. You knew this was a big offer and Joel, as always seemed hesitant, but after a moment of silence, he accepted your invitation. Because fuck he could do with a drink right about now.

This then turned into a routine for the both of you. Meeting for a late night cap after your shifts were over and also in your free time, either having a few at the Tipsy Bison or at each others houses.

🍃🍃 Present Day 🍃🍃

This of course was no different tonight. Patrol running fondly and you both getting back to Jackson much earlier than anticipated.

Once you arrive back at the gates you look up towards Joel. “So…same tonight Joel? Wanna pop by mine and grab a drink if you’re free?” You secretly adored how Joel would react when you’d ask him to come over, still slightly unsure and not used to your kindness and simply wanting to be with him. While he stares down at you in thought, all you can think is please say yes, please say yes, please say yes. And after what feels like minutes have gone by, he gives you a gentle smile, “yeh sure darlin’. Just need to pop by mine n’ I’ll be over.”

You nod at him, grinning at his acceptance until eventually you part ways, rushing back home and hoping he’ll give you enough time to quickly freshen up until he comes round.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

Joel gets to yours in no time at all, making his way up your porch and standing outside your front door. He knocks on your door a couple of times, ready to hear your small footsteps and see your wide smile welcoming him inside your home.

Whilst he continues to stand there, trying to wait patiently, you don’t answer. He waits a few more moments until knocking again and doing so much louder this time, but after another minute of waiting…you still haven’t answered.

He knows this isn’t like you; front door opening the second you hear his hard knocks echoing through the four walls of your front room, barely giving him enough time to prepare himself and ushering him inside with your open body language and sweet voice.

It makes Joel think that you’re somewhat excited that he’s here.

He isn’t worried, that’s what he wants himself to think and he knows he shouldn’t be, trusting you fully with how you carry your independence and welfare. The many times he’s been inside your home you’ve always reassured him that you don’t take longer routes back and that once your shifts are over, you’re making yourself straight home.

But yet why does his chest suddenly feel slightly heavier? Why does his throat feel tight and restricted? You would have got home by now, so why aren’t you here? He’d never doubt you by all means, but right now he needs to know if you’re safe.

So he thinks fuck it, and lets himself inside.

You two had become close enough now that he’d know you wouldn’t mind if he walked into your house on his own accord, especially with the unknown certainty of your wellbeing in his thoughts and it becoming his main concern.

He pulls down the door knob, initially thinking to himself, please be unlocked, and thankfully when it is, he lets himself inside. Firstly he checks the front room and kitchen, which are both encased in darkness, softly being lit by the moonlight sliding through the sheer curtains hanging on your window rods. He lets out a frustrated sigh, you’re nowhere to be seen.

He calls your name, followed by a darlin’, y’here? Again, no answer. Once both rooms are looked over he’s making his way upstairs, his large boots creaking across each step, careful not to trip over himself. He notices that the first door which he suspects is your bedroom is halfway open, the absence of light clouding the room and just the gleam from the landing light outside dimly illuminating the space. He gently opens the door and like the others, the rooms are empty. Once he’s about to make his way back downstairs, you waltz out the bathroom.

You were naked. Towel in both hands and currently drying the ends of your hair, with soft hums of a song vibrating along your sealed lips and eyes closed. Mind oblivious to Joel's now wandering gaze.

Joel couldn’t move, his body frozen and lascivious eyes glancing down at every inch of your bare skin that was visible to him.

Your hair was drenched with droplets of water falling seamlessly onto your shoulders and goosebumps covered the skin of your arms from the abrupt coolness that hit your body once you walked out of the warm and steamed-covered bathroom.

Your breasts were fully in view, the shape of them accentuating your waist and your nipples hard from the cold temperature change.

It was like Joel’s life had instantaneously gone in slow motion, and fuck he was so grateful for it. His eyes mapped out every line and curve of your smooth skin, how the water covered you and cascaded down your body making you glisten in the dim light.

His knees buckle under him when his eyes land in between your legs, his vision getting a subtle glimpse of your sex.

He can feel his cock growing for you, becoming hard and twitching with need. He has no control over it, and he knew if he looked down now there’d be an evident tent expanding in the thickness of his denim jeans.

Your eyes abruptly open when you feel a radiation of heat in front of you, your throat letting out a surprised yelp. Your limbs act quickly, throwing the towel across your bare chest so it covers your upper body and ends just above your knees, swiftly giving yourself some dignity.

It takes a moment for you to contemplate what’s happening in such a quick amount of time, and once you realise it’s Joel who’s stood in front of you, seeing you naked and who’s in such close proximity to you, you jump at the act.

“Fuck Joel!” You squeal in surprise.

Those two words spring Joel into action. Who the fuck does he think he is? He knew he was expected here but never like this. You must think he’s a creep, wandering into your house to catch you so exposed and open, and all for him, just for his own personal pleasure.

He brings his large hands up to his face, palms covering his now reddish features and blocking all images of you out of his mind. His voice gets stuck and his words stutter in his chest, all thoughts fogged and glazed over, hoping anything will come to mind as to what he can do to explain himself.

Your hands clutch your chest tightly, your touch easing the thumping of your heart. “Jesus Christ Joel…,” you chuckle awkwardly, “you scared the shit out of me.”

He looks down at your stairs, body retreating to provide you with some comfort and to insinuate that he’s not trying to make you feel uncomfortable.

“F-fuck darlin’, I—shit, I’m sorry,” the words fall quickly off his lips in hasted rambles, voice attempting to explain why he’s put you in this situation. “Y-you weren’t answering the door I thought—fuck I don’t know what I was thinkin’—I thought somethin’…”

The more he hears the miserable attempt in his tone, he knows there are no words that’ll make this circumstance any better, so he comes up with the next best solution.

“M’gonna go. Fuck, I’m sorry.”

Before you can help relax his nerves, his feet are moving faster than his thoughts, throwing all his weight down each step of your stairs and straight to the door, not even daring to look back, dreading to see that look of shock and how flushed your face had become from his sudden presence. He needed to get out and get out quickly, slamming your front door firmly shut and leaving you in silence.

The loud bang causes your whole body to flinch, shoulders and face wincing inwards from the harsh sound.

You never expected this to be the way it would go. Bluntly coming face to face with the man who’s been lingering on your thoughts right in front of you, him now seeing every part of you, slowly being uncovered by his lengthy stare.

His face was in full shock, eyes wide and mouth fully agape, all of his warm colour being ripped away from his features, but his feelings kept unrecognisable as he eyed your body up and down.

You cannot help but think to yourself; Why did it make you feel so good, seeing him become so shy and flustered in comparison to his hard and demanding nature? Knowing that you were the one who pulled his guard down. Seeing that undisclosed side of him that you’d never get a chance to see.

You begin to wonder what he’d thought. Did he like what he saw? Would he think about you when he’d return home? What could’ve possibly happened if he hadn’t scurried off when he did? The different scenarios cause your heart to race again, a toying smile caressing its way across your face.

But then maybe his reaction was out of pure disbelief, not wanting to present you with the thought that he was giving you the wrong impression. False hope. And that it was just a simple mistake and he’d never want it mentioned again.

You don’t move from your spot on the landing, feet concreted to the ground and mind puzzled, racing with too many questions that you know can’t yet be answered.

So for right now, all you know is that this is going to be something that could possibly change your relationship with Joel, either for the better or for the worse.

And you beg it’s the first option.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

Joel feels humiliated. He feels ashamed. He knows he’ll never be able to come back from this, having possibly ruined the relationship that he knew you had ought to seek out of him for so long. That moment his eyes had finally seen you so intimately he knew his current feelings for you were now out of his control, and that he would never be able to keep his thoughts about you hidden, like he had been doing pretty much since he had got to know you.

It’s become too much for him to bear. What the fuck is he going to do. He’s completely embarrassed of himself and too much of a coward to face you. He needs time away from you, to alleviate the stress he’d put on himself.

So he decides to change his routine altogether so he can avoid you as much as he can. To avoid the crumbling mess that he’s made. But no matter how many times he tries to sidestep the obstacles of that sudden consequence. He sees you everywhere.

Whether it’s in the mornings. Just when you were about to start your shift with whoever it was you were now working with, fuck he wanted it to be him. Or either at the canteen eating your breakfast or through the frosted window of the Tipsy Bison, clutching a drink in hand, with just an empty stool and silence beside you to keep you company.

He feels terrible, fully conscious of your confusion as to why he’s pushing himself away from you, leaving you with numerous questions in the thickened air that now surrounds the two of you, and Joel having no intention of answering them.

It had been a long time since Joel had allowed himself to feel or do anything other than protect himself and others, and he was fucking terrified that out of all the people he had been acquainted with throughout the years that it was you that had these unknown feelings of wishing and wanting someone resurfacing. Even during and before Tess, Joel had never been interested in those sorts of relationships, until now with you.

Joel had lost a lot of people he’d put his care and trust into, and every single time that affliction happened it crushed him down even further than the last.

He thought that maybe if he’d push you away intentionally, he wouldn’t have to deal with losing you all together.

He knew that empty void inside could easily be filled if he allowed himself to relish in the feelings he felt for you, and deep down he wanted nothing more than to show it to you, but his mind and body had been deprived of it for so long he’d simply forgotten how to.

How could he just become so honest and vulnerable in such a short space of time, and with someone he’d only known for a couple of months, even if your relationship had developed quicker than any other he’d had? How can he be with you in such an intimate way and come full face to face with the truth?

Because fuck, it had been way too long since Joel had given another woman pleasure.

He knew it was wrong. The wanting. The craving he felt for you. And you were so much younger than him it made his chest hurt. He knew what people would say if they found out, Joel being involved with a much younger girl. He cared more about what people thought of him than his own and it pushed his feelings down even further.

You had been so soft and sweet and kind to him when all he wanted to do at the start was ignore you altogether. He was so impolite when he barely introduced himself to you, and the fact you had swallowed down the rudeness of his words with a smile, he knew you’d forever change him.

He wanted you so bad, and it felt like a huge weight off his shoulders once he’d finally admitted it to himself. But it wasn’t just your beauty that had him questioning his whole life’s purpose and what he believed he wanted. It was how confident you were, and the way that confidence radiated off you. How you’d persevere when people or life threw obstacles at you. And you were so fucking welcoming to everyone that added to it.

Just seeing you for all you were, so supple and bare and open to his gaze just moments ago was just the last straw for him to cave in and just accept his feelings.

He knows it’s bad but there’s not one ounce of him that feels any regret. The constant pondering of what you’d look like finally coming to light, and it is better than anything that he’d pictured.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

The moment his feet make their way through his front door he’s rushing his body through the house and straight up the stairs, not even bothering to switch on any of the lights or even question if Ellie was home. Once he’s upstairs he takes himself into the bathroom and turns the shower on so cold water runs out of the fossil. His skin feels hot to the touch, burning sweat coating his forehead and clothes suffocating him as he frantically shreds the fabric that clings tightly to him.

He hisses through his teeth, the cold water falling onto his bare back and shoulders, trickling down his body and cooling his heated condition. His breathing is laboured, chest rising and falling in quick bursts while he attempts to calm himself.

He pushes his body forward, eyes meeting the floor and preparing himself for the crisp temperature as the water pours onto his hair, the wet strands dropping in front of his face as he allows his head to fall in defeat.

He’s hard. His cock standing strong in between his thighs and aching. His tip was red in desperation, with that tight coil of pressure rising in his low abdomen.

He shouldn’t. But his minds to overpowered with the need to come he’s pretty sure that if he doesn’t, he might pass out.

A low grunt rattles in his chest when his shaky hand wraps around his shaft, stomach muscles clenching and legs quivering with need.

He can’t take it slow, fucking his hand at a vigorous pace and already feeling his peak creep its way up to the surface. His head hangs back over his shoulders, eyes falling shut and small, deprived moans leaving his lips.

His tip is so sensitive he can feel it everywhere and all over his body, pre-come pooling at his slit and covering his fingers as he uses his other hand to grip the shower wall in front of him.

The moment his vision is blurred and his mind explores all of his demands, all he can see is you. The image of you carefully opening the shower curtain, your body exposed and knees falling onto the shower floor as you take his cock into your mouth, savouring the salty flavour and pushing him to the back of your throat.

He thinks about how you’d look; mouth so small compared to his thick cock and using your hands to wrap what you couldn’t fit in your mouth, wetting every inch of him with your saliva, and swallowing his release down with that sweet smile you curse him with.

He’s going to come, and it’s happening painfully quickly. Your appearance bringing him so so close to his orgasm that it’s like he has no control of his own body, yourself having full dominance over him and you weren’t even there.

He stutters over his words, those exact words he wishes he could really say to you, “fuck darlin’ that’s it. You’re—shit y’gonna m-make me—.”

He inhales in a sharp breath and his body eventually lets go, his cock left without release for too long as his hand continues to tug on his thickness in irregular and faltered motions, pleasure rippling through his whole body like a tidal wave.

His release runs down his fingers and spurts on the tile wall. And there’s so much of it. His cock is pulling so much neglect from him that his other hand has to grab into the shower curtain to hold himself up.

His mind races through the thoughts of how your mouth or cunt would feel in comparison to his hand. The way you’d swallow all of him down your throat, opening your mouth to show him exactly how good you were for him, mouth all empty and tongue licking your lips to taste all of his come. And fuck he knows you’d be so tight; so warm and soft as he’d fill you with all of him, your eyebrows knitting together in slight discomfort from the stretch. He’d know you’d take him so well, begging him to fuck you like he knows you truly deserve.

He freshens himself up and makes his way into bed, hoping that sleep will give him some sort of a stress-free night, and to mostly block out the image of you. Joel feels that regret instantly, knowing too well that he shouldn’t have let his body take over him the way it did.

Joel already knew it was going to be a long night.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

Joel avoids you like the plague.

His way of steering himself away from you has gotten so bad that he’s asked for his patrol shifts to be with other people, and to be cut to shorter hours to avoid you completely. His reasons are that he wants to try again with previous partners, saying that he was harsh with them before and wants to do better. Or he’s too occupied with things at home and with Ellie. You didn’t even hear this from Joel himself, Tommy confessing it to you one morning when your patrol shift was about to start.

Whether it be in the early mornings at the canteen or weekly patrol meetings; he’d be up and off the moment you’re entering the building, chair tucked under the table and the entrance door opening and closing before you can get the chance to scan him out from the crowd. He’d even begun to skip his daily drink at the Tipsy Bison, which he never missed out on. He’d just make his way back as soon as his shifts were over, muttering quiet goodbyes and marching his way down the street and straight home.

His absence makes your heartbreak. Did he think the situation was that bad? Was he that embarrassed by it that he’d made the decision to avoid you forever? It wasn’t you that had made the situation awkward and it didn’t have to be. You thought he’d come up to you by now, but yet still after the two-week mark, you hadn’t spoken one word to one another.

You want to scream till your voice aches, till that hurt in your throat replaces the other pain felt low in your chest. You want to let out that built-up frustration that had begun to boil over, to talk to someone who could easily give you hope about the whole situation.

And that one person who you knew could help, didn’t want to talk to you.

You need answers and you know you have to talk to Joel eventually, even if he didn’t want to. This circumstance can’t go on for much longer and the both of you know it. So if it has to be you to initiate it first. Then so be it.

You don’t know what suddenly gives you that burst of energy and confidence to confront him, but your body’s moving before your mind can even process where it’s going.

🍃🍃🍃🍃🍃

It’s late. But not too late at night so you know Joel will still be up and that you won’t be disrupting him. Once you freshen up after your patrol shift you’re making your way to his house, the walk from your home not being too far from his which you’re thankful for. Your mind attempts to drift elsewhere; analysing other things as you know if you reflect for too long about the possible outcomes, your mind will start to counter multiple reasons as to why this is indefinitely a bad idea.

But then was it such a terrible idea? The both of you were grown adults and people who were now close enough to be able to talk to one another and to have a reasonable conversation.

Without having any opportunity to regret your decision and give yourself more time to back out, you’re standing right in front of his porch, feet walking up the few steps and hand now inches away from knocking on his front door. You take a final deep breath in through your nose and exhale out your mouth, giving a few gentle knocks as you wait for Joel to open.

How long have you been standing here? Would he even answer knowing it was you who was waiting nervously behind the door? Fuck, maybe he was asleep. Yeah, he’s definitely ignoring—

Your ears pick up that sound. Those familiar boots treading across old oak flooring, getting louder and more prominent with each step until finally the door opens and a tall frame stands in the doorway.

Well you think…this is it.

“Hey Joel…” your voice is quiet and just slightly above a whisper, like your throats pushing it straight back down, too anxious to speak as you take all of him in.

He looks tired, his hair fuzzy and sticking up in different directions. Fuck maybe he was sleeping. His beard hasn’t been trimmed, but the stubble brings out the sharpness of his jaw. He’s wearing a checkered flannel, a dark forest green with burgundy red crossed stripes, the fabric buttoned up only halfway showing the bare tanned skin of his chest underneath it. Your eyes drop down to the sight of his chest and quickly rise back up to his face, heart pounding and mind racing with all the thoughts of what you’d rather want to be doing to him at this defining moment.

His face drops when he sees you, and fuck it hurts to see it. His stare wanders around you like he’s lost. You can see that distinct look in his eye, like his mind playing tricks on him, and dumbfounded as to why you were here on his porch so late at night, with that look of distress on your face and in need of answers.

“Uh, hey…”, he runs his hand through his hair. An act he hopes would proceed as confidence, but he’s worried it’s showing every ounce of apprehension running through him, “what are y’doin—“

You beat him before he can finish his sentence. “D’you mind if I come in? I thought we could talk.”

Joel’s said no plenty of times, and it’s such an easy word for him to say. Mostly all of his life he’s been rejecting people and saying that one term more than he could count. But with you, no doesn’t exist in his vocabulary, “yeh—,” he coughs out the strain in his voice, “uh yeh. Sure darlin’.” He moves his frame to the side, “come in.”

You smile at him before making your way past him and into his home. And once you step in, the side of your arm subtly grazes his front, your body trying to abstain from his touch. The hold he has on you and he doesn’t even know it. Feeling him so close for just a second has your mind going dizzy, his body giving off so much warmth that has your cheeks heating up.

You make your way inside so you’re now standing in the middle of his front room. And once you’re inside…it feels weird. You’ve been in his house plenty of times, but in this circumstance, it feels different to you. Like you’re seeing it from another perspective. The whole room feels bigger somehow, the décor and frames covering the old brick feeling somewhat unfamiliar and unrecognisable as you look around, hoping that the walls surrounding you will give you some sort of consolation.

Outside his house you felt confident to a certain degree, preparing yourself to get straight to the point but right now, your mind conjures through all the different scenarios that could possibly happen.

You hear the click of his door shutting, his frame coming into view as he just stands there and watches you watch him. It’s awkward, hardly having talked or even looked at one another for weeks. You try and break the silence. “I hope I didn’t wake you. I thought I’d pop by as I thought you’d still be up.”

His voice is quiet, “no you didn’t wake me. Just didn’t expect to see you that’s all.”

Of course he didn’t expect you, he’s been avoiding you as much as he could for the past couple weeks.

The silence is loud, bouncing off the walls and deafening. You can just about hear the voice in your head as it tells you to leave. It’s saying yes, yes this is a terrible idea and why did you come? He doesn’t want to see you. His feet can only just be picked up over the roaring in your ears as his boots make contact with the floor, his body moving only a few steps in.

He doesn’t look you in the eyes, “So…everythin’ alright?”

He has no reason as to why he’s said it, and he regrets it the second it leaves his lips, already knowing that everything’s not alright. That he’s aware of the suffering he’s put you through. How he’s constantly and intentionally ignored you for as long as he could, how he’s escaped all possible interactions with you.

You give him a blank stare, eyes boring into his faltering stance, “Uh...I don’t know Joel,” you cross both arms over your chest, “why don’t y’ask me.”

You were getting straight to the point, your courage outweighing his without question, something that he’d already anticipated the moment he’d see you again.

But yet, that’s what he loved about you. How you weren’t afraid just to throw yourself into situations that could become awkward, how self-assured you were to confront him about something he knew was out of his depth, and those lingering unknowns with what the consequences would entail.

But this doesn’t stop Joel from becoming flustered by your words, his stare firmly locked down at the floor, voice flat and one tone, “don’t know what y’mean.”

That makes you chuckle, his vague response causing the air in your lungs to contract, annoyance clearly being shown in your pitch, “oh Joel please. You don’t speak to me anymore and apparently have no fucking time for me. You’ve been ignoring me for weeks and to even swap partners and cut your shifts short just because you want to avoid this. To avoid what’s clearly been bothering you.”

He can hear as each word falls from your lips the substantial burden he’s placed on you. And he feels awful for it. He never wanted it to go this way, him leaving you with nothing but his neglect on your side of things and not giving himself the chance to act on what he’s really been feeling.

The look of bewilderment is held strongly on his face, brows furrowed and mouth firmly fixed straight, blocking anything he might want to say. His posture remains restricted, bend forwards to hide himself from his own mistakes.

“I just…,” you let out an exhausted huff, “I don’t know what to do. What’s been going on with you lately? Why won’t you just talk to me. You’ve been so distant with me and I want to know why.”

He’s still stood near the door way. Hands down and glued firmly on his sides. He’s agitated, not having any ounce of preparation for your statement, his body being thrown into hot flames without hesitation.

He shrugs his shoulders, “s’nothing. Don’t wanna talk about it.”

You burst. “Bullshit Joel. I know it’s mostly because you walked in on me that one night. Because if so. I don’t see why it’s such a big deal. It was a simple mistake.”

His voice becomes much louder, and it surprises you. “What do you want me to say? Huh? Yes that’s the reason,” Joel now makes his way into the room, marching over in your direction, “and yes it’s a big fucking deal, okay?”

His statement has you easing, finally noticing that you’re getting somewhere with him. You want him to understand that even though his reaction came out of pure astonishment and humility, he didn’t have to act this way, even if you liked that he saw.

You attempt to calm him, “it doesn’t have to be Joel. Why can’t we just go back to—“

“Because I can’t get the image of you out of my god damn head. The way you looked I can’t…,” he eventually sighs in defeat, “I can’t stop thinking about it. It’s there every time I see you, even when I try n’avoid you you’re still in my head. It’s there when I close my fuckin’ eyes a night.”

You look up at his face, your expression is wide and body shaking with adrenaline. He’s frantically staring at you now, in desperate need for you to say anything as to why he knows this affair between you both is a bad idea.

“Joel—“ you say in condolence.

“I shouldn’t…fuck I shouldn’t. I know it’s bad and I know I shouldn’t be thinkin’ about you like that.” He runs his hands across his face. “It’s wrong darlin’—so wrong.”

It’s all starting to make sense, the missing pieces connecting and creating a full picture. The realisation hits you fill force; the reason as to why he’s been avoiding you, why he’s cutting down his hours and how he’s swapped his shifts around, all because his thoughts about you since that moment you both shared have had him questioning his feelings for you.

And that he liked what he saw.

Now that you’ve recognised his emotions, it strings your own into action. Gently moving yourself closer to him, taking small steps forward and watching for any doubt in his eyes, your words simple and hushed. “Joel. It’s not wrong. It’s okay.”

His shoulders stiffen when he catches how close you’ve gotten to him. He knows if you come close enough, it’ll have him pushing all reasoning out the way. He sees the way your body’s moving so intently, walking so slowly to him, his head already shaking in disagreement.

“I’ve wanted to talk about it…” his eyes visibly bearing the shame he’s felt in himself since he’d slammed your front door shut, “n’ I feel so fuckin’ bad for how I’ve been treating you. I jus’ didn’t know what to say or do to explain myself.”

Joel has your face softening as he tries to explain to you why he’s acted the way he has. Being too ashamed in himself to confront you about his reaction on that night, and how negatively his actions were after it.

You’re still making your way towards him, his words only spurring your movements on with nervous excitement building in your stomach. His eyes are fixated on your face, seeing nothing but acceptance and understanding washed over your facial features. And it makes his palms sweat, “sweetheart I—.”

“Joel just listen to me. If you’d had just talked t’me we wouldn’t be in this situation. We’re both close enough now that we should feel like we can talk to one another. N’whatever you’ve been feeling for me I’ve also been feeling for you. And if I’m being the honest one now, I’ve felt this way about you for a while. Fucking hell Joel if it’s taken us this long to admit it I’m glad you saw me like that.”

He backs away slightly, pulling himself from the magnet that’s forcing you so close to him. The pressure that surrounds him is suffocating, the tension in the room beginning to thicken, “I shouldn’t of— sweetheart it ain’t right. This. I can’t… “

He wants to give in, and he can tell that you can see it in him too, his body language yielding into you too easily. He needs to finally feel something he’s missed out on for so long, and fuck he wants that with you. It’s right here in front of him as your words and gaze initiate it, but now it’s in his grasps, his mind can’t seem to comprehend it.

The two of you are that close now he can feel the heat emitting off your body. But he can also sense that your still sceptical, not moving too close where you’d break the revealing traction that’s growing between the both of you. You look into his eyes, watching him earnestly. “And why not Joel? What’s stopping us from doing what we both know we’ve wanted for so long?”

And the fact is, there’s absolutely nothing. Not one single thing Joel can muster up or give any reason as to why he shouldn’t stop himself from having you, to take you right here and right now.

So he thinks of one pathetic excuse, and his face grimaces. “I’m a lot older than you sweetheart…”

His justification makes the corners of your mouth curve upwards. If only he knew. “You think I care about that? Joel there’s so much more you need to be worrying about these days. We’re living in an apocalypse for fuck sake. Your age has never been a bother for me.” Your eyes fall down to his mouth, “I actually like that you’re older. I like it a lot.”

A haltered exhale flows from his lips. All he can see is the pure want in your eyes, pupils dilated and eyelashes fluttering. He can feel the desire pouring out of you and drenching his skin, affecting him more than he thought it would.

He knows the more you stare at him the way that you are, with that look of just surrender Joel. I want you as much as you want me, he’ll do anything you want, no matter what the price may entail.

You gently place both of your hands onto his firm chest, but not too forcefully, hoping the touch would be just enough to ease him into you. You can feel the beating of his heart hitting the skin of your palms as his chest palpitates wildly. And that’s when you try and relax him, your hands moving up and down to inspect the newly felt part of him. You dig the tip of your fingers into his muscles to help relieve his rigid stance against you.

“Joel—,” his name falls so cautiously from your lips, so indifferent to how you usually say it. As this time it’s said with lust drooling off every letter. This moment has been replayed over and over in your thoughts too many times; how he’d feel so close to you, how his body would tower above you, how he’d gaze at you with need in his eyes, his mouth leaning in close to yours.

Your hands follow further up his chest and onto his shoulders, pulling at the neck of his collar so your hold makes contact with his bare skin, making more of his tanned chest visible to you.

You voice follows up his upper body, “I want this. And I know you do too. So don’t be nervous with me. Let me take care of you Joel...”

You step a little further in, his body as near as it can get and now brushing your front. Your hands stay where they are, your head falling back so you can see his face, your doe eyes peering into his, “please. Let me show you how much I want you.”

He doesn’t say anything, eyes locked on the shape of your lips and arms still placed at his sides. His form however leans into you voluntarily, begging him to just simply give in. His backs curved over, face almost level with yours as he waits patiently for whatever you want to do to him. You pull down on his shoulders just a little more and stand on your tip toes, luring his lips closer to yours.

You give a faint kiss to his mouth, just so subtly and quickly that he doesn’t have the time to react. His moustache tickles your top lip, and the sensation has your mouth quivering. You move your lips to the corner of his mouth, kissing him there once and then kissing his cheekbone, pouring every ounce of appreciation you have for him onto his skin. He breaths heavily against your face, his breathing low and eyes falling shut.

It’s his turn now, and you can slowly feel him returning the affection. With every graze of your mouth on his you can see the affect it has. Your body waits in anticipation, waiting for him to wrap his arms around you tightly, to squeeze and grip as much of you as he can.

You place another light peck on his lips, your mouth now hovering over his, the both of your faces only millimetres away from each other as your voice whispers the honest truth.

“I really need you Joel.”

His body shakes, tongue already salivating just from the slight taste of your lips on his mouth, so sweet as he finally gets a tease of how you feel. His arms that have been secured straight on his sides are reaching out to your safety, his embrace wrapping around your back, holding you close.

His eyes open so faintly, glancing down at where the two of you are lightly attached. And you’re so close. He can smell the freshness of your shampoo, he can feel your hands caressing his muscles, your needy touches igniting that fire inside of him. Your eyes tell him everything; that once hidden stare saying please Joel. Give in. Let me show you what you need.

He needs you, and he wants you to show him exactly what you want to give him. So he mumbles a low and greedy fuck before his mouth pushes strongly towards yours.

Once Joel moves in the rest of the way, you allow him more of your body to touch, arms wrapping round his neck and pulling his mouth down harder onto yours, small fingers threading though the soft curls on the nape of his neck.

When you brush your tongue across his lips he’s easily giving you access, opening his mouth wide as the both of you savour the taste of each other. A satisfied hum leaves your mouth and travels straight into his, your tongues dancing with one another.

His hold on you can’t let go, hands lifting up and grasping hard onto the back of your neck and knotting his fingers in your hair, growling in fervor as he continues to explore the inside of your mouth.

Your body contorts so effortlessly into his, moulding in shape as he bends forward to push himself so boldly into you, your spine curving backwards with the way he’s gripping you.

But you pull him back way too soon for his liking. He pinches your skin and prepares himself when he notices your feet are moving him backwards, his hands clinging onto you in until he feels the back of his knees hit the corner of the couch.

His whole body drops onto the sofa, the touch of your mouth and hands leaving complete numbness on his skin that he misses instantly. He holds onto the cushion and arm rest, knuckles turning white from the clench as he just watches you stand there, bearing down at him, with a gentle smile plastered across your face.

It feels so overwhelming. Seeing him like this. Having known Joel for as long as you have it hadn’t taken you long to uncover that cynical persona he’d put out for himself. Joel was strong. Joel was a man of integrity and leadership, so watching him melt into the palm of your hands has your insides tingling with control.

His eyes are steamed over and his mouths marginally open while he takes all of you in. You lean your body forward as your hands land on his chest, putting most of your weight on him to make yourself comfortable, your knees being placed on the sides of his legs and lowering yourself down on him.

Fuck he knows there’s no going back from here, now that you’re sitting on his lap, sighing in fulfilment when you drop yourself down on his thick thighs.

He knows you can feel his hard on, his cock becoming needful the moment your lips touched his. And he can’t help but feel embarrassed by it, how easy it’s been for you to have him right there, his body quickly responding to your hands on him.

You trace patterns on his arms, fingers following the creases of his flannel and hands moving up to his shoulders. His atmosphere’s hot and heavy underneath you, the trust in his own actions buried beneath him while he looks at all of you in complete awe.

You slot your hips more into him so they’re flushed up and close to his groin. Yep, you can definitely feel his cock now. You moan his name and your voice comes out strong, much more pronounced than he knows his will be. “Fuck Joel. You have no idea how badly I’ve wanted you like this.”

Joel bites back the desperation that pressurises the back of his throat, “christ sweetheart,” his shock is followed by a harsh swallow, “you can’t say that to me’.”

Your words have power over him, and you love it. You lean your lips down to the side of his face, mouth inches away from his ear as his stubble tickles the side of your face, “why not Joel? Don’t you wanna hear how badly I’ve wanted you.”

He doesn’t say anything whilst you continue to spur him on, your kisses travelling down his jaw and neck as his pulse rapidly beats against your mouth. You give a lingering kiss on his sweet spot, finding that place that has him shuddering under you.

He’s quiet. And you feel like you’re back at square one with him, hands not touching you and his words have disappeared. You’re now contemplating your own beliefs, his silence starting to come off as unsureness, mind fixated on too many things at once.

You try and make him feel less tense, “hey…” you brush the strand of hair that’s fallen in front of his face, also lifting his chin up to look you in the eyes, “talk to me Joel.”

Depending on who he’s with, Joel has always been a man of very few words, having never found the time or place to be so talkative or to make general conversation. But the situation you’ve put yourself in with him, silence is the last thing you want him to be.

You want him so much, but you can’t let your pure want overcome the circumstance too much, needing him to express that he’s wanted what’s about to happen as much as you have.

His voice is hesitant, “it’s jus’… y’sure? Y’sure you want to do this with me?”

“Yes,” the answer leaves your mouth in a instant, as it holds so much certainty in it and so much truth, “I’m sure Joel. Since the moment I met you I knew. You’re the only one I wanna do this with.”

This isn’t like him; his easy comebacks, his sarcastic jokes. You wonder where has that Joel gone? Why is he so concerned about you. You’re throwing yourself at him and he’s yet to catch you. It has your mind twisting and turning until…your eyebrows droop in, mind deciphering in understanding.

“It’s been a long time since you’ve been taken care of. Hasn’t it Joel.”

He’s motionless, jaw firmly closed and hands still resting on the sofa, his touch only inches away from your thighs. “Answer me Joel,” you say in solace.

“Yes…,” he chokes out, fuck he’s feels stupid, eyes closing in complete surrender and voice trembling with how easily you’ve read him.

He expects you to laugh at him. To humiliate him. Tell him how can he be so weak with you when all he’s ever known is the hard life that’s been full of danger that lurks around each corner. How can this world that he’s had to adapt to pull such a doubtful response out of him.

But instead, you caress the stubble on his jaw in sympathy, and his head follows suit. You hold his face in the palm of your hands, your voice faint and warm, “poor Joel. It’s been a while since you’ve had someone want you like I do. Give you pleasure like I do. Someone who’s treated you right.”

He needed to hear you say that. Fuck he does want it, he wants to finally be the one who stands back and lets someone take over. And he wants it more than anything to be you to give it to him.

You clock your head to the side, “is that what you need Joel? Need me to show you how good I can make you feel? To show you what you’ve been missing out on?”

He nods his head embarrassingly.

Now you’ve got him. All he needed was time and patience, and your reassurance to get him there. You bring your thumb up and drag it across his bottom lip, your tone dropping an octave, “say it Joel. You don’t need to hide from me. I need to hear y’say it.”

He inhales in through his nose, praying to god that he can summon up the words to tell you exactly what he desires, “please darlin’. I need you—it’s been so long. Fuck I want you.”

You can feel your arousal seeping into your underwear from his pleas, his lack of sexual attention thoroughly soaking the material.

You rub your clothed core onto the tent in his jeans, moaning as his hard cock grazes your throbbing clit. A drawn out mmm fills the space between you, your tone of voice seductive, “good boy Joel.”

His groan pulls deep within his chest, he likes that. He likes how you praise him when he’s done something right, when he’s been good, when he’s done exactly what you wanted him to do.

His reaction has you biting your lip, “you like that don’t you Joel. Y’gonna be good for me? Gonna let me do what I want with you?”

His eyelids are half open. Yes he thinks, yes I’ll be the best for you. You can do absolutely anything you want to me and I’ll let you do it.

His response is clingy “yes. Fuck. Yes I’ll be good f’you.”

You smile at him, giving him a rewarding kiss on the lips. But before he can deepen it you pull back, Joel pouting at the coldness your mouth has left on him. You lower your gaze onto the fully grown bulge in his jeans, “you wanna know what I’ve thought about?”

He’s allowing you to say what you’re about to say without actually telling you to. Excepting that his body’s lost all power, your weight on him making him lightheaded, his mind becoming intoxicated.

“I’ve imagined what these big hands would feel like on my skin,” you articulate, taking ahold and tracing your fingers lightly across his wrists and over his calloused palms, using him however you please. You inspect them, noticing that his fingers are hard in texture, rough to touch but the rest of him is soft.

“I’ve picture your fingers across my cheeks…,” you use his knuckle to sooth your cheek, “and how they’d feel on my lips…,” and then bringing them down to your lips, “how easily they’d cover my breasts.”

You can hear the air falter in his throat, face locked on his hands that you’re using. You allow his hold to drop down your neck and lower to your chest, staying there for just a second until you lead them further up and back to your lips. “I’ve made myself come so many times with how these thick fingers would fill me up. Fuck Joel I know they’d stretch me out real nice.”

Well shit.

Your smirk against his fingers, “you want that don’t you. Want to feel how I’d struggle to just to take your fingers. How I’d come all over them. Preparing myself so it’ll be easier for me to take your cock afterwards.”

Joel feels like he could come just from your words alone. Every single syllable being exactly what he’d pictured in his head. He lets out a weak huff, “christ sweetheart. Fuck let me do that. You can use my fingers. Wanna feel you come on them—please.”

“You’ll have that soon Joel,” you coo, “ just let me have my fun first.”

You remove yourself just as he was about to ask you what you meant, standing back on both feet while he looks above you. His hands fall down onto his sides once again, knees bouncing in anticipation.

You remove your top, inching the fabric above your head and throwing it somewhere on the floor behind you. You give him a lascivious smile before your hands make their way behind you and unclasp your bra, your breast now visible and free from their confines, and to Joel’s wide stare.

Just as he was about to usher you back onto him with his grabby hands you’re unbuttoning your jeans, pulling the denim down your legs and leaving you in just your underwear. You waste no time in hooking your fingers into the thin material and sliding the final piece of clothing off your skin, showing all of yourself once again to Joel.

And it all floods back to him. Like you had never left. Only now it’s more detailed than hurried and rushed as it was weeks before. He remembers how silky your skin looked, how your breast shaped your frame, your nipples hard and perky from the cold air. How your body held this natural glow, and right now it’s beaming from the moonlight casting through his window.

He can see your arousal coat the insides of your thighs, and fuck he’s a goner. He wants to lean forward are spread your wet folds and delve his mouth and tongue into your sweet cunt. He wants to devour you and make you come all over his face, to use him as you ride out your orgasm.

But you do the exact opposite. Instead of settling yourself back onto his clothed thighs you drop yourself onto your knees, reaching both hands out and dragging them up and down his legs, caressing the muscles as you watch his thighs twitch.

You call out his name. “Joel?”

And he stutters back. “Y-yeah?”

Your one hand travels up and cups his thickness making his hips buckle. Fuck he looks big, and he feels big, the rough outline of his cock being shaped by the tight material that hugs him. You lick your lips as your mouth becomes hungry, yearning in need to be filled, “can I suck your cock?”

His head slacks onto the back of the sofa, his cock pulsing and reacting so well to your words, and how they glided so easily off your once so innocent tongue. He looks at you with hooded eyes, “fuck baby…”, he’s pushing his cock up into your hand, giving you the go ahead, “yes please.”

You squeeze his girth, watching his face screw up at your tiny hold on him, “you’re being so polite, aren’t you Joel. Y’doing s’good for me.”

His thighs constrict when you trail your other hand across them, fingers finding their way up his clad jeans and skimming the material.

The suspense is too much, his mind running the image of your pretty mouth wrapped around his cock. He needs it badly, the thought enveloping him to the point where he’s becoming quick with his movements, frenzied hands pulling his belt though the belt loops.

But his motions are put on a standstill when you stop him dead in his tracks.

“Let me Joel. I’m the one who’s looking after you, remember.”

He nods his head, eyes following you whilst you undo the rest of his belt and pull down his zipper. His one hand returns to it’s rightful place on the arm rest and the other is on his thigh, compressing the muscle and clinging on like his own life depends on it.

There’s no way he’s hiding it, and even if he tried there’s no contradicting it. Once his zippers undone all the way, he’s lifting his hips eagerly to help you pull off the denim and relieve that pressure building in his lower stomach.

His erection is resting heavy in his boxers and it makes you mouth water, parts of the material deeper in colour from the pre-come that’s coming out of his tip, painting them in his arousal.

The size of him through his boxers has you gasping. You thought he was big in his jeans, but nothing compares to seeing him right now. “Fuck Joel you’re so hard already. Lift your hips up again for me. Let me see you.”

He’s so willing to comply, raising his lower body and watching as you pull the waistband of his boxers over his cock and down his legs.

His tips red—looking angry and hard as his cock hits his stomach with a smack, his pre-come pooling onto the hairs just under his bellybutton.

You wrap your dainty hand around him, a hiss pulling from Joel’s teeth when you inspect his thickness.

“I knew it,” you confess to yourself, “knew you’d be big Joel.” You tilt your head down and kiss his slit, moaning at the taste, “n’you’re so fucking pretty.”

You get straight to it, lowering your mouth and swirling your wet tongue around the head of him, collecting his release so he covers all of your tastebuds.

A flavoured hum leaves your lips and pulsates and laps around him, finally savouring those thoughts that clouded your mind all day and night. Now never having to wonder how Joel would taste; how he’d feel inside your mouth, what he’d look like above you while you urged him closer to his orgasm.

You look up at him through your lashes, landing continuous licks to his slit, “this okay Joel?” you murmur, like he isn’t already putty in your hands.

“Christ,” he grits, his cock reacting to every single swipe of your tongue, “d-darlin’—.”

“Go on Joel,” you utter, “tell me how badly you want me to suck your cock.”

Fuck you’ll be the death of him, his chest filling with oxygen and voice frail, “yes darlin’ jus’… fuck. Want you to suck my cock please—please I need it.”

You giggle at his eagerness, the sound vibrating all over his cock and causing his hips to buckle up, edging his length deeper into your mouth.

You pull off him just ever so slightly, tutting your lips together, “now stay real still Joel. Don’t move or I’ll stop. Can you do that for me?”

He’s quick to nod his head in full understanding, cock becoming inpatient and weighty and full in your hand.

This was even better than you’d imagine. This little game you has started with Joel. And noticing how much he was liking it had your cunt dripping for him. Joel’s withering above you when you put your lips back on him, his stare lingering on where you’re both connected. He gasps when your mouth swallows all of his tip, mouth back to swirling your tongue around him like he is your favourite flavoured lolly pop.

There’s no going back from this now, and why would he want to after you’ve just given him a taste of letting go. Why the fuck did Joel stop himself from delving into something he’s been without for so long? How had he forgotten what it was like to be given pleasure and praised for it?

And with your perfect mouth wrapped around him, it’s just the reminder he needed.

You slip more of him inside your mouth, each drop of your head reaching down further until he hits the back of your throat. Your gag reflex contracts around his girth causing Joel’s stomach to tighten, using all his will power to stop himself from thrusting up and into your mouth.

Because he remembers your words. Stay real still Joel. Don’t move or I’ll stop.

You alter between bobbing your head and circling your tongue around his swollen tip, the mixture of your saliva and his own pre-come coats his cock and makes him glide so smoothly in and around your mouth, the sounds of your slurping and sucking filling the room.

Joel chokes on his words, “f-fuck sweetheart, your mouth…shit it feels so f-fucking good. C-can I move my hands? Please—jus’ wanna feel ya.”

He’s being so patient, keeping his hands down onto the sofa, and so much that his strength could split the seams of the material. But behind his compliance, there’s a hunger so deep, so guttural. You can feel it in the way his hips weight themselves down, his thighs clinging together.

You lift your mouth, his tip leaving your warmth with a light pop. Your cheeks are flushed red and eyes watering from his cock abusing the back of your throat. You use your hand to slowly pump him, keeping him in a state of pleasure, “y’doing so well Joel, and being so good f’me. Go on, I’ll let you touch me, touch me wherever you like.”

You edge him on, bringing your mouth back down and swallowing all of him once again. Joel pulls his upper body forward, soothing his hands on the dent of your spine and anywhere he can reach without disrupting you and your movements on him.

Joel tries to put all of his focus into his breathing, to give it full attention and try his best to not come so quickly. “Christ darlin’,” Joel mutters, “you’re so perfect. Y’feel so fuckin’ soft.”

Your moan onto his cock, showing him that his touch on your skin is affecting you as much as it is for him. His grip remains on your back and his other hand moves under you and grabs your breasts, pinching your taunt nipple in between his fingers.

And fuck his fingers feel good, continuing to bob your head on his cock and dragging your one hand from his thigh down to cup his balls, gently squeezing them in your palms.

Joel’s eyes widen in surprise at the new sensation, “holy s-shit.”

Joel’s rambling. And he’s not even self-conscious by it. Exposing all confessions and desires to you so voluntarily.

“I touched myself after I saw you,” he acknowledges, “fuck I tried not too but I couldn’t stop myself. I p-pictured you like this. On your knees and taking me like this. Shit you made me come so quick.”

You clench your legs together. Fuck he’s got a dirty mouth when he puts his mind to it. Your eyes are glossy whilst you look up at his wrecked face; his foreheads covered in a sheen of sweat and eyebrows are knitted together to hold off the orgasm that’s about to course through his entire body.

You move your mouth up to his slit, keeping your attention there where you know he’s the most sensitive. You kitten lick his tip, smiling devilishly at his fucked out form, “is that right Joel. Did seeing me like that make you horny? Did seeing me so open like you did make your cock hard?” You tease him and he nods at you.

“You’re a naughty boy. Aren’t you Joel.”

Joel sighs pathetically, his length throbbing in your hand at the way you provoke him, how you push him even further into divulging into his secrets that he once thought he wouldn’t manifest.

You press wet kisses along his base, pecking his cock in endearment and your stare never leaving his face. Your lick a long strip up the side of him and hollow out your cheeks when his tip fills your mouth again.

He’s close. You can see it in his face. The rushed whimpers gliding so evenly off his lips, the shallow rise and fall of his chest. And he knows that you know it too, how pitifully fast you’ve got him to that peak.

“You gonna come Joel?” You ask him enticingly, “you gonna come in my mouth? Like you imagined when you fucked your hand thinking it was me.”

Fuck he wants to. He wants to feel your tongue lick every last drop of him as you swallow his come down your throat, opening your mouth to show him how much you enjoyed it.

He grunts your name, followed by a weakened yes. Yes I’m gonna come. You’ve gotta stop. Baby please stop. Wanna be inside you. Need to feel you.

You chuckle gleefully, and you will stop. But he doesn’t need to know that right now. It’s so fun seeing him struggle. So you continue to lick him and roll his balls in your hand, spurring him on and pulling him just a smidge closer to his high.

He attempts to pull himself away from your mouth, but every time he does you move back onto him. His thighs begin to shake, chest sucking humid air into his lungs to calm his heart rate but also the pulsing in his cock, “fuck darlin’,” he warns you, “oh my—fuck I don’t—y’gonna make me come. S-shit stop.”

And this time you do. Not wanting this to be over before you’ve even started. You eventually pull your mouth off of him, watching how his cock drops onto his lower stomach with a wet slap, glistening and covered in your spit.

You can see how’s Joel’s trying to hold it back, wrapping his own hand around his head to stop the throbbing still being felt across his cock. His tummy clenches and then releases, becoming soft as he fully takes back charge of his breathing.

You wipe the corners of your mouth with the back of your hand, leaning your lips down to press kisses across Joel’s belly, loving how plush he feels against your lips.

“How was that Joel?” You question, “you still okay?”

You’re such a tease, mouth shifting up Joel’s stomach and onto his chest, his arms pulling you up as you go. “M’fine darlin’,” he huffs, hooking his fingers around the back of your neck, “jus’ come ere’. Come sit on my lap.”

Before you do, you help him remove his boots, and then his boxers and jeans that still rested by his ankles while Joel unbuttons his flannel and throws it on the floor with the rest of his clothes. The image of his bare muscular chest has your breath hitching and your pussy pulsing. You rest your weight on his shoulders and put yourself onto his thighs, where this affair had began just moments before.

But only this time, you’re fucking naked and your bare pussy is making a mess on his cock.

“I love these hands…”, you bring one up and play around with it, inspecting them and pushing your thumbs down into his palms to massage the longed strains in them, “they’ve worked so hard,” you caress them, “you’ve work so hard Joel. For too long.”

You rest your own hands on top of his, caging them so they grip the skin on your thighs, “touch me again Joel,” you plea, “I ain’t gonna bite.”

You can feel that his hands have no intention of moving, his hold just squeezing the flesh of your legs, with his eyes showing you his need for your guidance, “or do you need some help.”

He gives you that well known signal. So you begin to move his hands for him, bringing them up and onto your hips and then onto the flesh of your waist. You can feel his pulse quicken again as you show him where you want him. You keep him there for a moment…watching the desperation fall from his lips. You smile at his reaction, loving how even having sucked his cock, and almost having him come down your throat, he’s still so hesitant in the way his hands follow your skin.

You guide his touch up to your breasts, feeling his palms kneading the sensitive skin. He massages your chest so tenderly, each rub of his thumb over your nipples pulling more wetness from your core.

You moan out his name, “fuck Joel,” the words giving him the permission to carry on, “that feels s’good.”

And god you feel so good. “You’re so soft darlin’,” he mutters, “y’feel better than I imagined.”

“You’re so sweet Joel,” you say, cherishing his words, “how many times have you thought about this?”

Fuck he’s thought about this everyday since he’s been given the chance to know you. He tried so hard to avoid the temptation that began pestering his mind when you were together. And even when you weren’t, you still drifted into his thoughts.

“Too many times baby,” he admits, “wanted you like this for so long.”

Joel’s so indulged on your breast. Having finally felt the way they fit so well in the cup of his hands. He kneads them. He pinches them. But his gaze instantly drops when you avert his other hand locked in place on your chest down lower and in between your thighs.

His cock jumps on his stomach, impulsively reacting to where he knows precisely where you want his hand. And mostly his fingers.

He doesn’t have time to behave, already using two of his fingers and gliding them through your folds and that alone has your head rolling back, your pussy clenching hard against the calloused skin of his digits.

He saw how drenched you were, but he becomes bewildered when he gets a feel of your soaked cunt. “Fuckin’ hell sweetheart. Christ you’re s’wet.”

And it’s all because of him; his words, his actions, his cock in your mouth, his lack of control. “It’s all for you Joel,” you softly speak, “you’ve done this. Sucking your cock has made me this wet for you. Want to feel you inside me.”

His fingers are uncertain. They’re Nervous. Each slide of them learning everything about you and changing their motions to see what has you twitching in his lap.

You become restless, the tip of his digits teasing your hole and the hood of your clit, “Joel please,” you babble, “put your fingers inside of me.” So he does. He inserts one finger into your deprived cunt, and fuck you feel warm and soft, his digits being engulfed by the heat and the pressure of your inner walls.

He doesn’t waste any more time in adding a second finger. Slowly pumping and curling them inside to reach that spongy spot that has your grasp strengthening on his shoulders, your features creasing inwards at the slight stretch of him.

You can feel how your walls are trying to accommodate his fingers, your pussy tight and restricted as your try and get used to having him there. “Knew I’d struggle to take you,” you say quietly, breathing out in rhythm to help you adjust, “yes Joel keep going. Yes that’s—fuck that’s it. I want to be ready to take you.”

Christ you were everything. Feeling your stuffed up pussy pour more of your wetness down his knuckle and hand, while Joel uses his thumb to play with your puffy clit, rubbing it in tender figure eights.

“Here’s what it want Joel,” you muster up to say, your body trying to take pleasure over the instructions you’d firmly set in place for him. “Want you to make me come on your fingers first,” you wrap your fingers around him again, giving his cock a slow tug, “and then you can have this pussy on your cock.”

It’s all becoming too much; how fucking filthy your mouth is. How the words flow out so fluently. It overwhelms him, and he’d be an idiot if he’d disobey.

You question him, raising your eyebrows, “you got it Joel?”

His fingers falter to a stop, knowing how vocal you like him to be, and what you’ll do if he isn’t. You need to make sure that he heard you, you need him to say that he fully understands you.

He gulps, his voice weak, “yes sweetheart.”

You sooth the patchy stubble on his jaw, kissing his lips and hovering your mouth over his, “now show me how y’gonna make me come,” you challenge, “fuck me with your fingers Joel.”

That sparks him into action, fingers back into the metrical pace that had your walls fluttering against him, mouth open with needy moans falling from them.

“Oh my god Joel,” you sob, “yes—fuck right there. Keep going.” He connects his lips with yours, again licking and forcing his way into your mouth as you oblige his invitation. He can taste himself as he still lingers faintly on your tongue, but he’s too far gone now to give a shit about that.

His fingers are relentless, hitting your g-spot each time with the tip of his digits, his other hand following suit to play with your messy and swollen clit, a whimper erupting from your throat and flowing into his mouth.

It hadn’t taken Joel much to find those hidden spots to have that knot tightening in your stomach. To have that pressure rising up and overheating. And fuck it had been a long time since Joel had used his hands to pleasure a woman, and he thanks the lord that he hadn’t lost his touch.

Your lips break apart for air, your mouth wet and abused from Joel’s ravenous tongue, with your chest rising and body shaking. “Oh my—,” you choke on your words, “fuck Joel. I’m so close. Y’gonna make me come—don’t stop.”

As if he’d ever stop, how could he ever stop.

His fingers keep up their pace, curling into your velvety walls and flicking your clit with his other hand. His weights ready for your body to tremble and contract as he gives you what you wanted, what he’d always wanted to give you.

“Yes baby please,” he begs you, “give it to me. Show me how pretty you are when you come.”

That’s the last thing you need for the string to snap, that coil in your lower stomach to burst, body falling forward and pussy gushing and throbbing on his fingers, your orgasm pulsing though you and Joel’s one arm already outstretched, ready to catch you.

You cry out his name, Joel Joel Joel, your body now using him for your own pleasure as your hips move on their own terms to prolong that feeling of ecstasy that’s Joel’s flared up inside of you.

“Yesss darlin’ that’s it. Fuck I can feel your pussy hugging my fingers so tightly,” and he can imagine what it’s like when he feels it on his cock. He kisses your collarbone and neck when your head falls back, sucking the skin red and leaving a trace of what’s he’s just given to you, marking you, eyes closing shut with that added gratification of his claim.

He lets you ride it out for as long as he can make it, because you deserve it with how he’s treated you. He slowly pulls out his fingers when his doesn’t feel your walls contracting around him, his two digits shining with your release.

Your body slumps forward and onto his chest, and he’d somehow forgotten how much he missed having you this close. His skins hot, making you limbs shudder. “Oh my god…,” you manage to say, arms wrapping around his neck, “fuck Joel you’re good at that. You’re s’good.”

Your words make him laugh, and god you’ve missed that sound, remember how stern he used to be with you, how it had taken you months to get him to even smile at you. You watch as he grins up at the ceiling, pinching the flesh of your hips.

You lift yourself and shift Joel’s body down lower on the sofa, purchasing his cock so he rests in your folds. You move your hips so his tip nudges at your clit, your pussy lubricating him with your release. Joel grunts at the sensation, with just the rubbing of your cunt on his cock has him rocking his hips under you, drawing him closer to where he needs you.

You shudder above him, and all Joel can do is watch you intensely. Waiting for that exact moment where your pussy engulfs his tip and your thighs start falling. But in his impatient state, it doesn’t come, you just continue to stroke yourself on him. And it’s the sound of your voice that pulls him back to you.

“Is this what you want Joel?” Like you don’t already know. “You want this pussy to ride your cock?”

He ventures out and pulls you flush down onto his hips, but you refuse and hold yourself frozen in place, ushering your hand up and cupping his jaw in a firm grasp, constraining his face to look at you.

“You’re so impatient Joel,” your features teasing him just that little bit more. “Now. I want you to tell me. Tell me exactly what you want.”

He whines deep from the back of his throat, “fuck sweetheart—” His breathings nonexistent, completely knocked out and winded, firm hands biting down hard on your waist, “I need you. Wanna feel you wrapped around me. Wanna make you come on my cock. Fuck I need it—please.”

You lower your pussy until his head is fully shielded inside you, lusting over that new stretch of his cock spreading you out. You take control of your movements, wanting Joel to feel all of you at a restrained pace, to take all of you in.

Joel strives to gain back some of the strength you’ve swept out of him, and fuck you did it so easily, plunging your hips down so your cunt takes more of him, and his thighs pushing upwards to meet you halfway.

Joel’s wrecked under you the moment his cock feels the comfort of your cunt. His face falling into your hot chest, and in an instant, you’re welcoming him as you knot your hands into the back of his curls.

He feels fucking incredible; he’s so hard and thick and even with his fingers before, the pull his cock gives you is such a painful pleasure. It makes your pussy burn, fluttering from that hot sting as his cock reaches heaven and smooths that spot inside you that has you seeing white stars behind your eyelids.

The back of your legs make contact with his thighs, and you’re pining at the fullness, “fuck Joel—oh my god.”

Joel musters up a chant of fuck fuck fuck with every inch of his thickness filling you to the brim. He grits his teeth down hard, pulling in his lip and almost drawing blood, needing to stop himself from becoming too into you too fast as his body flavours your tightened walls around his cock.

You can feel his breath heat the skin on your chest, his tone muffled by his lips kissing the flesh of your breast, “fuck baby—shit you feel…“

You keep your pussy flushed on his lengh, pulling his hair through your fingers making him wince from the tug. He lifts his marks from your chest and brings your mouth down to melt into his, only then to take his touch off of yours and pierce into your eyes.

He wants to tell you that he feels on cloud nine. He wants to say how beautiful he thinks you are, how he’d never be able to go a minute without having you like this, and not only intimately but just to have you so close to him, to have you so near. How you’ve made him question all his past decisions.

So he tells you the honest truth, “…perfect. Christ sweetheart you feel perfect. Like y’made for me.”

You become embarrassed by his words, and rewarding him with a swirl of your hips, testing your body to see if your cunt has yet adjusted to his thickness. His fingers felt incredible but it doesn’t compare to having his cock buried inside you. You can feel how your walls pull him in so well, your slick and a mixture of his own arousal making his cock glide so simply in and out of you.

You pull your hips up with shaky legs, so only half of his cock’s shielded inside you and drop back down slowly, repeating the action until you have to bear yourself, feeble hands being placed on his knees, arching your back as your head faces the ceiling.

He has you everywhere; hands gripping your hips and waist, his contact moving up your ribs to the curve of your breast and neck, touching as much of you as he can.

Your pussy throbs and latches down hard on his cock, Joel’s mind unable to focus on nothing but the squeeze. “Shit baby,” he curses quietly, “y’so fucking tight.”

You look back at him, voice mellow and movements evenly paced, “yeah? Does this pussy feel good? It’s all yours Joel,” you promise him, “fuck it’s all for you.”

Your assurance go straight through his body and down his length, which starts to throb inside you at how true your words are, your confidence emitting straight onto him. He looks at every inch of you, taking his time to fully appreciate what’s in front of him, to admire what’s on top of him; the way your chest lifts and falls with every ragged breath, breast sensitive to his fingers and mouth, the way your whimpers fill the room, your body covered in sweat that makes your skin glisten.

And that’s when he notices a change in your attitude, dropping your guard just a smidge as you continue to move your hips but now at a hurried pace. Your hands are suddenly needy and attentive, your words now imploring, “fuck Joel. I need you—,” you beg him.

“What baby,” he says, his tone low, “tell me. Shit—tell me what you want.”

You need him deeper, you need him harder, fucking all of himself into you until you can’t walk the next day, until the second orgasm he brings out of you has your head dizzy with just the thoughts of him.

“I need…,” you mumble, “Joel I need it harder. Please fuck me. I want it hard.”

Yes he can do that. So he stops your movements, ready to give you what you need. “Okay darlin’. Fuck— yeah okay.”

His stare is firm and direct, and all you can summon is a weakened nod and a pull at his shoulders, beckoning him to swap positions.

You cage your arms around his neck to keep a firm hold of him, whilst Joel puts his one hand down onto the sofa and the other on your back, carefully lifting his weight off his hips and crashing the both of your body’s onto the sofa, his cock remaining nestled in you warm walls.

He sets his one foot onto the floor and the others bent by your side, giving himself that extra leverage and strength while he holds himself up by his palms, his mass adding pressure onto the cushion below.

He soothes, coasting his touch over and pinching all of you, his hands sending bolts of electricity down to your core, your legs wrapping around his lower back to keep him condensed and up close.

Every thrust of his hips has your back lifting off the sofa, his cock continuously hitting that spot inside you, his tip nudging that knot cramping in your stomach and pulling a gasp from your throat.

He looks down and regrets it the moment his eyes stare at where you’re connected. His chokes on his breath and his thrust stall, not trusting another pull of his hips in your cunt knowing too well he could come quickly and shamefully. His pays attention to how his cocks covered in your wetness, saturating his skin and the hair on his pubic region.

You force his head up from where his eyes are frozen, moving his attention to you, “look at me Joel…,” you beckon, “look at me when you fuck me.”

And he listens. Even though he’s the one on top of you, he’s listening to you. He watches you with a desired expression as he observes the pure ecstasy flourishing through your features.

He knows you’re about to come, he can feel it wrapped all around his cock. It’s that same feeling of your cunt fluttering on his fingers just moments ago, when he watched that pleasure take over your body, and when he let you ride it out in slow and steady waves. But only this time, it’s so much more intense. And this time, it lunges his own orgasm forward.

Fuck he needs you to come. Like, right now.

Somehow, it’s like you’ve read his mind, finally jumbling out your words, “f-uck Joel. I’m close. Fuck I’m so so close.”

He’s barely holding on, arms juddering and stomach clenching to keep himself from spilling his release inside of you, needing you to finish before him.

“Give it to me darlin’,” Joel pleads, “that’s it—let me feel ya. Let me feel you come around me.”

His words are what you need to break, you begin to to pulse and convulse around his hard length, arms dragging him down as you breast compress into his sticky chest, weak arms holding onto his shoulder blades.

The feeling of your pussy coming around him has his hips faltering. Joel has no fucking idea how he’s lasted this long, his own legs shaking and his eyebrows furrowing in concentration, “fuck darlin’ I’m gonna—” his forehead connects with yours, “fuck y’gonna make me come.”

Once your high has substantially subsided, and his thrusts have you riding out every flood of pleasure thats washed over you, your mind can take into his words as you place a gentle kiss on his lips. “Please Joel,” landing another kiss onto the side of his mouth, “come Joel—fuck I want it inside. Want you to fill me up.”

Surely he’s not hearing correctly, his ears ringing and heavy heartbeat blocking all noise around him.

His movements become delayed, his voice cracking, “y’sure darlin’?” Fuck let that be what you said, because he’d do anything to come inside you right now. To stay nestled in your cunt for as long as he possibly can. “Is that what you want?”

Your eyes are glazed over, tears threatening to spill down the sides of your face, “yes Joel,” you cry out, “please come in me. Wanna feel it.”

“Christ,” he huffs, his breath hot and heating the already reddish flush on your cheeks, “okay—fuck okay I’ll come inside you baby.”

You intentionally clench your walls around him, digging your heels into his lower back to keep him deep and as close to you as possible. You keep that up until Joel warns you, mumbling your name before a oh shit I’m coming, fuck I’m coming. And with a few more thrusts of his hips they slow down, his high taking possession of his body, his seed filling you up.

“That’s its Joel. Fill me up.” Your words prolonging his orgasm, feeling his warm come coat your walls and his cock twitching with each spurt of his release.

His thrusts come to a hilt, finishing off with one final quick and deep thrust before all of his body weight lands on top of you, chest rising and falling as he tries to catch his breath.

You feel so full of him. The way his body is hefty on top of yours, his mind oblivious to his own weight as he squashes you deep into the sofa. And you wouldn’t want it any other way. Once he has dominance of his own body again and gathers enough energy to, he pulls his softening cock out of your hole with a groan, his release dripping out of you.

He wraps his arms around you, changing the position so you’re now back on top, your head now lying on his chest and your legs becoming tangled together.

You both lie there in silence, the sound of Joel’s heart and his overall warmth across your skin has your eyes feeling heavy. You dig your chin into his peck, giving him a gentle smile, “y’feeling okay Joel?”

“I’m okay darlin’, he soothes, running his hand through your hair, “I’m more than okay.”

He kisses your lips, eyes looking back down at you, his voice coming out small. “Listen darlin’, I never meant to ignore you. It’s just…I haven’t felt this way in a long fuckin’ time and I know there’s nothing I can say to—“

“Joel stop—,” you place your finger on his lips, shushing him before he can say anything further.

“We don’t need to talk about that now,” you say, “that’s all in the past. And all I want you to know is that I understand, and it’s okay. We’re okay.”

He nods at you, grabbing ahold of the blanket that rested on the top of the couch, pulling it over your body to keep the warmth in.

You always know just what to say, your words having his eyes easily falling shut with you all over his mind. He’s spent the last fortnight feeling shitty and regretful, struggling to get any sleep as he thinks about how much he’s hurt you. But right now with you resting on top of him, and with soft snores leaving your lips, he knows he’ll never have to worry about you again.

#joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller one shot #joel miller x f!reader #the last of us smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal one shot #pedro pascal x f!reader #pedro pascal x female reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #joel milller x female reader #pedro x reader #pedro

[showtoonzfan]

Now that the episode is out officially, here’s my rant review of Oops!

PROS:

- Fizz and Ozzie were adorable and I honestly love them. Despite the sex jokes, you can tell they love each other for who they are OUTSIDE of sex. While I did wish we would have seen more, (like how Ozzie took him in and fell in love) they’re still adorable to watch. They’re the better version of Stolitz, can the show be about them instead?

- Brandon’s voice acting holy shit, he really knows how to sound like he’s in tears or is broken. As much as I hate the character and feel no sympathy, he displayed genuine and broken emotion very well.

- Alex Brightman Alex Brightman

Okay that’s it. Moving on to the Cons. Bear with me, it’s a lot and I go back and forth a bit. 😭

CONS:

So for a quick short summary, this episode:

- Once again puts more focus on the filler plot rather than actually focusing on the relationships between the characters, so all we're left with is a 10 second clip of Fizz being burned while the rest of the episode is surrounded on sex jokes/petty bickering and Stolas and Ozzie sitting around.

- Completely erases what made Blitz and Fizz's dynamic interesting in the first place because it retcons it with a dumb miscommunication trope about how Fizz actually wanted to see Blitz and Blitz tried reaching out to him. Not only does this feel like a cheap attempt to make Blitz out to be sweet/sympathetic and NOT the one in the wrong so Fizz can suck up to him, but this also makes no sense within the narrative.

- Has Fizz forgive Blitz despite him being the last person anyone would think would forgive him. (So honestly ruins Fizz himself because it turned him into a soft boy who's forgiving compared to the asshole he was in Ozzie's) All because Viv would sell her whole soul before she even remotely considers painting characters like Blitz and Stolas out to be the one's in the wrong.

- Takes Stolas out of the hospital completely, erasing all the drama/tension Western Energy had and proves that that episode was utterly pointless.

- Turns Striker from an interesting complex villain to a Saturday morning cartoon goon.

- Proves to us that Crimson is just a flat tool and gives us more prove that the world building rules Viv set up in season 1 legit don't matter.

-Ruins Blitz/Barbie's feud now because now you're making Barbie look like the one in the wrong since the fire was an accident. God forbid a female characters emotions in this show are justified.

But if you want my more in depth rants, it’s under the cut! (There’s a lot so bear with me lol)

- As usual WAAY too many sex jokes and swearing. It gets annoying and repetitive at times and some of them distract from the main plot. There’s a long and I mean LONNG dragged out joke of Fizz talking about Ozzie’s dick, then later saying he’s hard when Striker has a gun to his head, as well as Blitz making a joke about him and Fizz making out once they hug. Again, Viv can’t be serious for 2 seconds without an unfunny shitty gag. I genuinely wonder if Hazbin is ganna be like this, where a character is in a life threatening situation or a deep dark serious scene happens only for the next scene to be sex related.

- This is one of those “shit happens because the plot demands it” and it shows. Crimson and Striker COINCIDENTLY meet up with each other, and Fizz and Blitz just so HAPPEN to be in the same exact area they are. Viv wonders why we call her shit a fanfic and this is what we mean, when she creates wild wacky plots and focuses more on THAT rather than the actual character writing. This entire episode hinges on a useless poorly last minute planned kidnapping plot that didn’t need to happen. Also way to once again make the characters idiots so the plot can happen, cause Fizz KNOWS Ozzie worries for him and that the Greed Ring is dangerous, yet purposefully puts the spotlight on him.

- Stolas did NOT need to be in this episode. The plot completely ignores the fact that he was in the hospital the last time we saw him, and he’s only here for Stolitz banter. You’d think that a character admitting they have feelings for someone would be a big deal but he just flat out says it and it’s so underwhelming and feels half assed with no weight to it. Fan comics have made more dedication to this than Viv has. We're supposed to believe him too despite the show failing to actually SHOW us this. Same for Blitz ranting about how “nice” Stolas has been to him, laughing at his jokes and liking his posts…hey Viv, can we actually SEE that on screen so it’s more believable? Or are you only determined to show them sexually flirting? 😑

- Once again Viv felt the need to shove a B plot into this episode and this one sucks because it’s just two characters sitting and doing fucking nothing. It felt like Viv had no idea what to do with Stolas and Ozzie, and I refuse to believe that Ozzie just sat there knowing Fizz was in danger. If anything he would have said “fuck the paperwork” and went to save Fizz himself. Way to show that gif of Ozzie getting mad as a sneak peak to get fans excited, only to see that Ozzie spends the rest of the episode sitting in a dark room LMAO what a let down.

- Ozzie is weirdly chill and cool with Stolas and it’s something I don’t get. While he did say that Stolas had the real “spirit of Lust” in S1E7, it still gave you the impression that he was also more poking fun at Stolas rather than respecting him. The whole point of House of Asmodeous was that Ozzie outs him and publicly embarrassed him. Stolas literally was intimidated just by Asmodeous’s mere name, and hid his face around him. It seemed like Stolas certainly didn’t want someone like Ozzie to know about his private life especially since they’re both part of the Ars Goetia. Now here Ozzie is just cool with him and it feels like a missed opportunity for their dynamic.

- Stolas confessing his feelings about Blitz also makes…no sense narrative wise. I thought the whole point of The Circus and the ending to Western Energy was that he was realizing that Blitz didn’t like him that way and was finally waking up. I thought that’s why he was doing this whole crystal deal in the first place, so he can let Blitz go, yet the show keeps flip flopping and insisting that these two love each other and are good for each other. It’s really making you realize how this season and the previous stuff set up is becoming nonsense because the writers retcon EVERY damn episode. Also….why the hell is Stolas telling Ozzie his feelings for Blitz? Out of all people, why is it Ozzie, the person who outed Stolas and embarrassed him. Why is Stolas even respectful of Ozzie? He has no reason to, and he’s not under the impression that he’s dating Fizz either. I get that he needs the crystal but mentioning his love for Blitz makes no sense.

- Striker and Crimson teaming up to kidnap Blitz and Fizz was such an ass puller last minute decision. It feels overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time, more because it feels like Viv has no idea what to do with these two villain characters other than give them something evil to do to start the plot. Also…why…are they working together? It feels so random.

- Striker’s character especially is all over the place. First he’s working for Stella, then he’s painted as the best assassin in hell, and now he’s…looking for more work I guess and working for Crimson? Why? Does this guy even have a motive anymore? It feels like his character is just dangling around until Viv wants to use him for another wattpad kidnap plot and it ESPECIALLY shows when Striker escapes for the THIRD fucking time. Can this character/storyline actually GO somewhere or are you just going to keep introducing him and have him run away. 🤦🏽‍♀️

— How did Crimson not know who Striker is despite him being labeled as “the most popular assassin in hell”, and how the hell does Crimson know Ozzie and know all the information about him being in a relationship with Fizz?? Oh right because we needed the plot to happen somehow. Still, even if Crimson did know that Ozzie was the "weakest" and loved Fizz, (which….what about Beezlebub?)) he still should have known he was playing with fire. I get that he's supposed to be evil and intimidating but how could he have predicted that Ozzie would actually stand down and fill out the paperwork? He could have immediately came there and killed Crimson for all he knew. It's just distracting how..not planned this shit was.

- Fuck this episode for calling Striker a supremacist. It makes no sense?? Viv is trying SO hard to villainize him despite him being the one in the right and it pisses me off. He has every right to be mad at the upper class, he’s part of the lower class that we’re said Hell takes advantage of, but god forbid we call out Rich and powerful Stolas because that would mean he’s a b-bad person and we can’t have that complex morality! This is so not a “eat the rich” story and it shows bc Vivzie is rich as hell. Striker as a character deserves so much better man. Congrats writers, you had an interesting character and motive set up for him, now he’s nothing but a silly goon that you might as well kill off already cause you clearly don’t care about him. Crimson meanwhile is just a piece of paper, a boring plot device I could give less of a shit about. I thought his motive was to go after Moxxie, now he’s just doing fuck whatever because this show desperately wants a bad guy for their filler fanfic plots.

- We get more world building issues, Ozzie and Fizz are so determined to hide their relationship for obvious reasons, but then at the end of the episode just say “fuck it, no one would dare tell anyway”. So now they’re being open about their relationship and lmao I told y’all the newspaper scene of Ozzie being called out for being a hypocrite wouldn’t go anywhere. Even if Ozzie did threaten his workers to not tell, they can’t be so sure that someone wouldn’t see or snitch, it’s kinda a retcon too cause they were pretty lovey dovey in Ozzie’s. Still, it makes the characters look dumb and it makes the rules Viv set up for Hell once again not mean anything.

- We finally get to see Fizz’s backstory in action and it’s executed in the most underwhelming way possible. It’s literally a fucking 10 second clip of what went down, and rather than experiencing the event for ourselves, it’s in flashback mode but with Fizz’s voice talking over it. That’s it. I’ve seen fan comics/fanart that built this shit up better than Viv did, that actually took the slow time and dedication it needed, and here it feels like such an afterthought, like Viv could care less. Maybe if this actually was a character driven show like Viv claims, Stolas, Striker, and Crimson would be taken out of the picture and then that would leave us with PLENTY time to actually explore and develop Blitz/Fizz, bc most of this episode is just them pettily bickering and Stolas and Ozzie sitting around. But nah, we gatta have our fanfic kidnapping plot. Same goes for the reveal of Blitzo’s mom dying in the same fire. Glad to know that she got the same treatment Moxxie’s mom did, where we don’t even know her and yet we’re supposed to feel moved and care about her death. You nailed that one Viv. 👍

- I predicted that this episode would victimize Blitz and have the fire incident be an accident, (because Viv is a pussy writer and can’t make her characters actually do bad things like god forbid) but I never thought they’d actually have the balls to have Fizz forgive Blitz immediately in the same episode and pull the “actually turns out that horrible thing you did to me helped me in a way”- trope. Biggest flaw of the episode, fuck you Viv. I was actually going to applaud Blitz for taking accountability, but then the dialogue reminds you that an abuser wrote this, and he shifts his apology to “okay but I lost something too see so it’s not all about you” as if he’s fucking dismissing Fizz’s trauma and making it about himself. “I love flawed characters” my fucking ass. I would have smacked a bitch if I was Fizz because Blitzo loosing his mother in the fire too isn’t an excuse?? Fizz lost his fucking ARMS AND LEGS, and at the end of the day Blitzo STILL KNEW HE WAS HELPLESS IN THE FIRE BUT LEFT HIM BEHIND. He could have gotten help and came back, but didn’t. If this were a good show Fizz would have threw that apology back in Blitzo’s face and said “I don’t care if it was an accident or not, you still left me there and then proceeded to loathe me for years”. This is why Helluva will never be Bojack cause at least characters in that show who got treated horribly by him knew when to say “no, fuck you.”

- The episode retcons again, this time they make it out to be that Blitz TRIED contacting Fizz the years they were apart but no one would let him see him. Then they say that Fizz actually WANTED to see Blitz but assumed he didn’t want to, so their entire feud was solely because of miscommunication?? Number one, show don’t fucking tell omg. And number two, that makes ZERO sense. Blitz talked badly about Fizz in Loo Loo Land, and when they finally reunited in Ozzie’s, it was clear they fucking loathed each other. You got the impression that Blitz was petty and jealous just because Fizz was more popular, and Fizz not only loathed him for the accident, but liked to rub in his face about how much of a big shot he was. They literally do that in this episode too, so the episode is literally contradicting itself. Blitz and Fizz had multiple chances to meet up with each other, you can’t just say “oh they couldn’t because no one would let them”- So which is it? Did they hate each other because of bad blood, petty drama, or that they thought the other didn’t want to see them? Pick ONE Viv and stick to it, but she never does. Their feud was interesting and now you ruined it just to have some sweet happy ending. “Adult mature show” my ass lol.

-Bottom line is Fizz shouldn’t have forgave Blitz so easily, or forgave him period. I find it funny how he says “it’s hard to just forgive you” and then he literally does lol. I feel so bad for Fizz fans, him and Blitz’s feud was honestly interesting, so to see all of this go down in a half-assed piss poor way as if this was Care Bears is….wow. The fan interpretations had more thought and care put into this storyline but what else is new lol.

- I’m really tired of these shitty annoying songs. If you’re going to get Broadway actors, please put effort into your songwriting and actually have them sing something good, not something that’s literally nonsense. This Fizz song sounds like it took less than a minute to write and Sam Haft was just thinking of anything he could think of at the top of his head. Also Why the fuck are Striker and Crimson just STANDING there while Fizz sings. They look like idiots, just SHOOT them omg. If this were a funny show, Fizz would have started his first note and Crimson just rolls his eyes and pulls his gun out.

- Fizz and Ozzie kill the lawyer but not…Crimson? Despite Fizz knowing what ring he’s in and even Ozzie knowing what he looks like? Same for Blitz, he doesn’t try to make sure Striker is dead. I get that the plot demands for these two to still be around, but there’s a way to keep them alive without making the main characters look like fucking idiots. Also Stolas just leaves without doing or contributing anything to the plot yay.

- Fizz: “Let him have it, you could say he’s earned it”— Uhm….Nope. Blitz did NOT earn shit. He didn’t even earn Fizz’s forgiveness. Last time I checked, the moment Blitz cried and said it was an accident, Fizz forgave him, knowing he didn’t mean it. What effort did Blitz do to “earn” that as well as the crystal? Because he saved Fizz and didn’t leave him behind for the SECOND time near the end?? Cause if so than the bar is extremely low. That’s the bare minimum, just because Blitz cried and felt bad about it doesn’t mean he should be let off the hook Viv. I hate this so much, what a shitty conclusion, it feels forced just so Blitz can have the crystal and just so the writers can once again paint him as the one in the right. It’s almost insulting that they make it seem like Fizz was in the wrong for assuming Blitz starting the fire too, same for Barbie.

God what a shitty day it is to be a Fizz fan, I’m sorry. The episode did NOT do him justice. Fizzarolli deserved better than that half assed gaslighting apology for someone who lost their arms and legs man, and I’m tired of the show letting every character suck up to Blitz and Stolas for their horrible treatment just because they feel bad. Not only that but the episode (as most recent HB episodes) was a huge time waster. Everyone was really hoping for an in depth walkthrough of his character/backstory but again, when he’s not with Ozzie, the rest/most of his screen time is dedicated to him being helpless and pointlessly arguing with Blitz, plus a long dragged out nonsense song that didn’t need to happen. It felt like SO much time was wasted when we could have used the runtime we have to dive deeper and see more, like….again it would have been nice to see Fizz’s life AFTER the accident and how he became well known as well as how he fell in love with Ozzie, but his backstory is briefly scratched upon in a single scene and that’s it, all because Viv wanted this filler plot and wanted to dedicate more time to THAT rather than actual character expansion/development, something we could have got had you took out Stolas and Ozzie’s B plot and Striker and Crimson.

Viv is so on her way to murder/ruin every character that isn’t Blitz and Stolas and I won’t be here to watch further. I’ll check out the Mammon music video thing but that’s it man, this show is going off the rails, Adding Fizz to the character adoption list!

#vivziepop critical #spindlehorse critical #helluva boss critical #helluva boss critique #helluva boss criticism #helluva critical #anti vivziepop #helluva boss #fizzaroiii #fizzaroli helluva boss #helluva boss oops #helluva boss review #vivziepop criticism

[starrvsn]

` ִ ꔫ ۫ ⊹ W.CLARK ˖ TIL DEATH DO US PART.

pairing: wally clark x fem!reader. 

what to know | 80% angst with 20% of fluff, comfort. fic, a pretty sappy ending. i do not own these characters and this is all fiction! — lowercase is intended.

word count: 5,280 (oops) 

spoilers: death and characters (also assumptions about characters back story). 

☆ on rotation: hate to be lame by lizzie mcapline. lover sung by taylor swift. she was mine by aj rafael. better for you by siaopaolo.

star left a message! my first fic! hope you enjoy and let me know how you felt about it :)

ab. you and wally were inseparable. bared souls to each other but still dancing around the fact of feelings for each other but one night he gathers the courage to tell you how he feels, things don’t go the way he plans and spirals out of control.

1984.

the soft ringing of a phone rouses you awake, your room dark and cool from the gentle breeze coming through the crack in your window. you rub the drowsiness from your eyes before sitting up. glancing at your clock, beside it is the soft yellow landline that rings, a light but repetitive tone. the red glowing numbers reading 11:51 almost made you regret waking up to pick up the phone but the constant ringing means the caller must be persistent to get ahold of you. clearing your throat you pick up the phone, a soft hello emitting from your lips.

“hey sweetheart” you recognize the voice almost immediately, wally clark your best friend since middle school. you two are inseparable, always attached to the hip and despite his reputation, how popular he was. he never let it hinder your relationship. he always joked that you two were high school sweethearts minus the dating part which also always confused people when you had told them you were just friends but your heart hopes, yearns for more.

“hey, did something happen?” there must’ve been a reason why he called you in the first place but he quickly denies:

“oh-oh no, everything is going well… sorry did i wake you?” his voice comes out rushed, as if he’s trying to speed up the conversation. the tone confuses you but you continue.

“not really, i was just trying to fall asleep.” you softly respond. fiddling with the cord, telling him a small white lie but if there was something about wally was that you never wanted him to feel bad at your expense, always saving him the tinge of guilt that affects him more than you thought. he was a soft soul, sensitive but resilient. one of the things that make you more drawn to him. he was someone who made you feel like you had a purpose in life.

“i, i uhm was wondering if you wanted to go for a drive. i-if not thats totally okay!” you can practically hear himself rubbing his neck. a constant habit he had when he was emmbarrased or unsure. you agree almost immediately. hearing the smile plastered on his face, he boasts about having the car for the night so it was the perfect time to make use of it. he promises he’ll come to get you in a few minutes so you rush to get dressed in warmer clothing compared to your sleep wear. as you wait for him, you couldn’t help but feel curious as to why he wanted to take you out at such a late hour. sure he didn’t get the car to himself often but from his tone you couldn’t help but feel something off. ultimately your mind settles on the fact that he just felt spontaneous and just wanted to spend time with your, knowing how the school year just began and he has been busy with the football team and his parents breathing down his neck, so maybe he needed an escape.

minutes pass and you hear the closing of a car door, then rounds of rubble as if someones walking down the side walk. you don’t know how but every time wally comes around, no matter what the sounds are- you always know it’s him and when you confessed this little sense of yours when he let out a boisterous laugh and told you “you have a little part of me then sweetheart.” that made your heart melt. excited, you softly pad down your steps and open the door before he can even let himself in. you had unlocked the door minutes prior to ensure a silent arrival. wally stands still for a few moments. his gaze focusing on your face, your cheeks blush as moments pass and his movement doesn’t change

“uh, earth to wally?” snapping your fingers in front of him, the taller boy jumps back in surprised wondering how you got there so fast, and how you look so effortlessly beautiful at midnight “done gawking yet clark?” laughing, sounding beautiful to his ears he looks away smiling shyly his hand coming up to rub the back of his neck, a repeating his habit. “so where are we going?”becoming the most talkative already, in return there is no response. which is odd coming from you usually commentary filled best friend.

“no hi, how are you? do you not miss me?” lightly shoving his shoulder. you divert the subject to where he could be taking you, the cold air making you shiver as you wait for his response. but instead of giving you one he just leads you to his car across the street, no words exchanged. huffing at the lack of communication you follow him across the street (looking both ways before you cross of course)

the drive to the park is quiet— comfortable silence with the silent play of music fill the air as he drives, you look out the window to stare at the beautiful landscape of the city since wally gives no other form of entertainment to pass time. trying so hard not to stare at him as he drives, you don’t notice obviously since you’re not looking his way but there’s a line of sweat collecting on wally’s hairline but even if you saw you would shrug it off blaming it on his hoodie but no, wally was sweating for a completely different reason. he’s about to change your relationship forever. well, not forever but the outcome can go of two ways, good or bad; with no in-between.

wally clark is going to confess his undying love for you and he feels like he’s gonna throw up from how nervous he is. he didn’t even greet you, that’s how tense he’s feeling he couldn’t even form any coherent word when he saw you, hair ruffled laying in bed with sleepy eyes. it was an image that he wants tattooed on his forehead, dead serious. luckily you didn’t notice how nervous he is because you usually can read him very well additionally, you haven’t asked him anything so he’s relieved to see that nothing he’s done has gotten on your radar yet. well, he didn’t greet you when he picked you up but you just shrugged it off, not thinking to much of it. passing it as oncoming sleepiness from staying up. the ride was filled mostly silence and was also accompanied by mark or your occasion humming, soon you arrive at the park which you immediately recognize as the one where you first met wally, on the swing set late at night when his parent became overbearing. you follow wally out of the car and up a path to a grassy hill out looking the neighborhood and beautiful night sky. he takes a seat and you follow after him, sitting next to him with little space between the two of you.

the scene is quite picturesque, wally wishes he brought his polaroid as he looks up at the stars hoping they’ll talk back to him, talk him out of it or something— maybe some encouragement because he’s been hyping himself up for this moment for so long, okay just for three hours but leading up to this moment he felt like time was moving so slow. the two of you just sit in silence for a while looking at the beautiful night sky until wally speaks up.

“i have something to tell you.” he starts, his voice slightly wavering. you turn immediately to look at him as this is the first thing he’s said to you since he picked you up, a sour feeling rests in your stomach as you process what he said, in fear of hearing what he actually he has to say, you try to figure it out yourself. which you’ll find out yourself was not the greatest idea. sitting up straight you look directly at him with a hand on his shoulder.

“wait don’t tell me, you’re moving? you got early acceptance to ohio state? if so and you’re only telling me now i’m going to murd— or no have you gotten yourself a girlfriend because god knows you nee—“wally shakes his head barely scoffing a laugh.

“no, that is not what i’m gonna tell you! now can you please stop talking? i practiced in front of my mirror for this.” practicing in-front the mirror for what? you tilt your head confused, but turn it upright immediately when another thought comes to mind.

“are you going to show me that stupid dances you’ve been learning because—“

“no! y/n let me say what i need to say before i vomit on your shoes.”

“hold on wha—“

“oh my god y/n! i like you! okay! i like you. god i asked you to not talk and yet you did.”

your heart drops and the sour feeling only heightens. wally on the other hand is frustrated and embarrassed because of your interruptions and his sudden outburst to you. it was uncalled for, he knows. high on his emotions the quarterback stands up from his spot and starts walking down the hill, ruffling his hair in frustration. cheeks red from both embarrassment and the cold. can’t believe you just confessed to her like that! horrible wally clark. now she’s not gonna even want to accept your confession. ‘vomit on your shoes’ what kind of line is that? seriously.

he groans, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he continues down the path. not even bothered to see if you’re following him, he probably just ruined your friendship for life. he’s never going to let himself live this down.

wally is mad at himself, not even you, he’s only a tad bit mad at you for you cutting him off but he’s more mad at himself— he shouldn’t have beaten around the bush, should’ve just told you there and then not have any cheesy climax to it; would’ve gotten it over with quickly. you watch wally walk off while you stay planted in your seat. still processing what happened. wait, wally clark just confessed to you, the man you’ve unknowingly devoted yourself for just confessed and you were interrupting him! what are you doing go after him! y/n go! you scramble from your spot. feeling guilty for cutting him off, you probably sent his confidence down the hill with him. god you felt horrible. “wally! wait!” you call from behind him almost tripping from the decline of the hill but with sportsmen instincts he catches you by your arm. “wally, oh my god. i’m sorry for cutting you off— i’m such a jerk for that.”you say as you pant for breath, your heart racing. you look at his side profile and he’s avoiding your gaze completely, moving his head to look to the side you’re not on. “it’s alright, let me just take you home.” a breath leaves you, take you home? that was the last thing you wanted right now “wally i—“ he cuts you off like you did to him earlier “y/n really, i accept your apology. let me— let me just take you home please.” he is dying from embarrassment at this point, might as well put him out of his misery. “but–“ you start while wally let’s out a hefty sigh and inhales harshly from his nose, rubbing the side of it with his thumb. “y/n can we just forget this all happened? it’s really late i’ll just get you home before anyone realizes your gone.” his tone is distant and really pulls at your heart strings, you didn’t want to forget about this, well some parts of it you wanted to remember like him confessing to you! but you didn’t mean to make him upset; he probably is thinking the worse right now and it’s all because of you, it’s all your fault.

you don’t say another word as you nod when wally briefly glances at you, his light touch on your arm leaves as he continues his walk to the car park. you follow behind quietly, guilt eating you up as you look at wally posture slump as he walks, he’s head hung low. looking small— all because of you.

the drive back to your house was even worse, it was quiet. no music no humming, nothing. just silence— you wanted to say something make it right again but you were afraid to worsen his mood more than you’ve already done. no farewells are exchanged when wally arrives in front of your home, he wanted to say something, anything but he just let the opportunity pass. although, just as you’re about to close the door, he murmurs a soft good night that you wish he could tell you looking in your eyes but instead his eyes stay downcast on the steering wheel. he doesn’t leave right away, he waits until you’re safely inside your house and then some more. he throws his head back wallowing in his emotions, he wished the earth would just swallow him up. when you get into your room, you peak through your blinds and see that wally is still there, you watch as he sits there, eyes closed and head back then he hits the wheel of his car a few times eliciting a gasp from you, feeling more guilty. eventually watching him depart from your street.

wally clark was avoiding you, you knew that much. after what happened that night wally began acting like you didn’t exist– as if you weren’t his best friend; as if he didn’t confess his feelings for you— which you’ve been thinking about for the last few days. it hurts, that wally’s acting so distant. he’s been hanging out with his jock friends— but you can tell his mood isn’t the same. usually preppy and extraverted, practices consuming his time and plans that pop out of thin air that keeps him busy so he doesn’t have to think about what happened with you, to distract him. you’ve tried calling him but it’s all been sent to voicemail or his mother ends up answering the phone, you could tell but it hasn’t been to easy for wally either. he feels like a dick for being this way after what happened but he’s just not ready to face you— face you’re rejection, face the embarrassment, face the spot in his heart for you that he now has to make disappear. he’s just not ready.

this whole wally avoiding you thing has gone longer than you both had expected— you, you were counting the days until wally spoke to you again and honestly you are becoming more concerned with how this is dragging out. you miss your best friend for goddess sake! you miss his corny jokes, his contagious laughter, his habit of running his hands through his had, how excited he gets when he see’s dogs on the street. you just miss him... you miss everything about him, your constant now gone. unfortunately you never end up getting the time to talk to him and by now its been months, now the homecoming game you plan on talking to him after the game. no excuses, no if, ands or buts can interfere with the dire need of bringing him back to you.

the chilly air nips at your cheeks as you stand in the bleachers watching the game. you were never a sports fan especially for football but when your best friend’s whole personality is devoting himself to the sport— not even for him but for his family, you had no choice but getting yourself used to the sport. you went to every game, however far it was you went. distance didn’t hinder your support for him. the game feels aching long and the constant cheering from both schools make it hard for you to focus, you just wanted things to be okay with him. you didn’t want to keep this cold war between the two of you.

now in the second half, you watch from the stands as wally takes a seat onto the metal bench. his mother right behind him. the conversation must be tense because as soon as the finish speaking. he’s up on his feet again. your chest tightening at the thought of how much pressure he’s under right now. you hold your breath as you watch wally catch the ball, running towards the the five yard line when a linebacker runs straight into him, tackling him— wally breaking his fall. you let out a shuttering breath as you watch him, your best friend lie there on the field and it feels as if time stops; you stand on the bleachers in disbelief. praying to some higher up that he’s okay and just being dramatic before getting up like he always does… but that never happens. all air is taken from your chest as you dreadfully walk down the bleachers, hoping this was some sick dream you were bound to wake up from. clamors of terror and commotion fill the stadium as the beloved football player is declared dead on the field. tears are streaming down your face, watching his body being carried in a black body bag that he would’ve joked about it being a tacky way of being taken out.. but theres no room for that you’ve never felt so empty, so helpless as you do in this moment. now never being able to accept is confession, apologize, make a amends. there was no future for you without him.

all wally can see is black, a dark abyss that consumes his vision as he feels weightless, as if he isn’t in his body. an out of body experience that he hopes to recover from. that he’s just in a coma and he’ll be reunited with you and tell you all the things he didn’t get to tell you sooner. his mind is consumed by the thought of you, even before the accident he wanted to see you, talk to you, hold you in his arms but when he opens his eyes he’s greeted by the bright lights of the football field. being completely alone in the stadium. still in his uniform. he sits up dazed and confused. he feels fine, if anything he feels like a whole new person as if he’s been given a second chance in living but what he’ll soon to find out, its not in the way he thinks. he feels a bit light headed as he stands and his eyes immediately landing on a figure when he had thought he was alone. he shouts to get their attention to no avail, confused; he continues to shout walking closer to them. as he gets closer he realizes it’s you with your head in your hands and yours shoulders shaking as you wail to your hearts content. he calls out to you, at first soft but then more desperate as you don’t hear him. he feels frustrated as tears of his own stream down his face.

he cries “yn, sweetheart please, please.” his chest tightening at the sounds of your crying. pleading, begging. a mantra repeating under his breath. he doesn’t want this to be it, to be over for him, for you. he can’t lose you. he doesn’t know where he is, how he got here and he especially doesn’t understand why you can’t hear or see him. if this what death is like he thinks he landed in hell.

wally doesn’t notice the man standing by the entrance. the man that he’ll soon find out is a guide into understanding what exactly is happening and coming to terms with the fact that he’s dead and will never be able to live the life he wanted with you. instead he’ll watch you grow without him as he’ll stay forever eighteen.

‘wallowing wally’ is the nickname rhonda had come up for him. jason chides rhonda for picking on the mourning boy but she insists it was to lighten the mood, the outcome being the complete opposite. when he was first introduced to the group he was quiet, timid, distant. the others understood the feelings and recent thoughts about the afterlife at split river and had assumed he would grow out of it. but no, it continues and rhonda’s continuous jokes about his behavior being the complete opposite to the boisterous quarterback he once was— but that guy since died along with his corpse. he’s now just a shell of who he was.

it was hard for him to watch you at first, he didn’t see you for weeks after his death but when you finally came back to school. you were an entirely different person; you looked paler, bags under your eyes, lifeless as you walked down the halls with soft murmurs about your appearance as you walk by. his heart shatters into pieces watching you, sitting alone during breaks. staring into space during class completely dissociative during class. you distanced yourself from your peers and never responded when someone gave you condolences about your best friend, just nodding then walking away. your were mourning the death of him and he couldn’t handle watching it. you’re hurting at his expense and it’s breaking his already shattered heart that can’t be mended.

so he distanced himself from you. like he did at the end of his life, he couldn’t bare to see you hurt so he spent most of his days on the rooftop. only coming down for snacks or to catch up with the others  but then back at his spot. never going to group because he didn’t want to talk about it. how a little of guilt sits in him everyday watching you mourn for him. days blur by and eventually wally extends to the stadium— he’s bitter, yes that he died during a game, without a fight but it was easier for him to get over compared to you. he will never get over you. he takes his time walking onto the field, closer he sees the memorial left for him. his picture surrounded by candles, flowers, notes and other things left by other students. he’s consumed by the notes and messages his peers left him that he doesn’t realize jason joining him.

“wally” he calls, the boy turns with his hands shoved in his varsity jacket. looking over at the latter with a questioning look. watching the male with his hand over his face shielding him from the sun.

“there’s something i think you wanna see.” as much as he doesn’t want to follow jason or be lead into his trap of being forced into group he couldn’t help the feeling of interest that fills him. as expected they’re towards the gym and as wally is about to protest jason interjects with strong statements about something being there for him. for the first time wally feels hopeful, that something happened— miraculously. he follows jason into the gym. the sight of the circle of chairs in the corner of the gym prominent in his vision but now he sees an extra person taking up another seat. he wasn’t aware that another death had happened at the school and if there was he would’ve been there. heard the sounds of death within the walls. he gets closer and closer, expectant of what jason kept hyping him up about. he’s about to inquire what it is when his eyes land on you. sitting in his seat, he stares at you in disbelief. you dont notice him at first and he takes is as a time to take up you appearance. one that he hasn’t seen in a while.

you look healthier, definitely healing from the homecoming game. you’re wearing a stripped sweater he had lent you, slightly oversized and a pair of dark wash jeans and your beat up converse. the only piece sticking out from your ensamble was the beige apron, stained with clay. it’s quiet around the group before mr. martian walks inside greeting the others.

“wally finally joining us i see.” that name catches your attention. you look up from the gym floor to your recently deceased best friend. your breath hitched, blood running cold, were your eyes deceiving you? you had just seen him died moths ago, the vision still etched in your mind and now suddenly he’s standing in front of you like he’s fine. you think your gonna throw up. wally never expected for his to happen, he didn’t expect for you to react by running out of the gym with your hand over your mouth… it was all to much but the feeling in his heart makes him run after you.  he doesn't know where you went at first but the rounds of retching in the girls bathroom makes him suspect that you’re in there.

“sweetheart, i know you’re in there and i’m not gonna go in there… for obvious reasons but i-i just want to talk.” wally runs his hand over his face, feeling stupid for what he just said. he had such a habit for blabbering even if it was a serious situation. still he just can’t believe you can see him, as much as he wanted to know how you dies; he pushes that thought to the back of his mind, his main focus was making things right with you. he stands by the door waiting for you to finish. he can hear the toilet flushing, then the stall door and the faucet running. his nerves are through the roof as he hears you footsteps come closer. he calls out your name softly as you walk out, ready to be on his knees begging you to forgive him, for what he did, ignoring you for so long, not giving you the time of day. he’s ready for you to yell and shout at him, slap him if you wanted to. he was ready for it. instead, the second you walk out you pull him into a tight hug. noticing the absence of your apron, shoving that thought behind. he bends over a bit to accommodate the height difference. he immediately wraps his arms around you, relishing in your body heat. he’d missed you so much that he almost forgot what it felt like to be in your presence but now that you’re here, there’s no need to worry for that anymore. the hug lasts for a while and soon the wet feeling of tears coat wally’s neck and varsity jacket as you silently cry into his shoulder. he soothingly rubs your back and gently rocking you back and forth, trying his best to comfort you while not trying to cry himself. your knees buckle and he easily catches you, whispering soft nothings to you. it takes you sometime to calm down. nevertheless he waits. listening to your cries become softer, hiccuping for breath as you slowly depart from him.

"i missed you." you tremble in a whisper. he gives you a sad smile cupping your cheek in his hand, gently swiping your tears away.

"i missed you too, sweetheart. fresh tears form on your waterline, eyebrows scrunched you grasp his face, pulling him into a kiss. he's astounded, the feeling of your lips on his was one he dreamt about for years, now here it is and he's standing there like an idiot not kissing you back. his grasps at your waist, the kiss is different from any he's never experienced. it's slow and passionate. you've been yearning for each other for  years, dancing around the potential of where your relationship can go. you're tired of waiting even after death. you relish in the way you lips feel on his after feeling so lost without him with all that emotion you’ve bottled up when you realize that you're in love with him. words cannot express how much he has an affect of you and he can say the same thing about you.  you both pull away a little breathless. you've been waiting to do that for years and wally is a bit envious that you beat him to it. your foreheads are pressed softly together, just standing in each others presence. it's a soft, intimate moment.

"i thought i was never going to see you again." you begin looking into wally's eyes. he tucks a piece of hair behind your ear, urging you to continue. “i thought i would've never be able to tell you how i feel. i-i was going to tell you after the football game but... you know.” wally stiffens, he can only assume what you'll say next but whether you break his heart of make his dreams come true. his feelings for you won't change.

“wally, you mean so much to me. you're my rock, always there for me when i need you. no matter what is it— if it was helping me pick out outfits when you hate to shop or picking me up from a disastrous date. i didn't know what it would be like to live without you until it actually happened. i felt lost, i felt like i didn't have a purpose without you. like a part of me died when you did. you give me direction, a purpose. wally clark, i love you. i love everything about you. you're little habits, the things you hate about yourself i love it all." tears are free falling again when you finish and wally's eyes are blurred with tears as he looks at you with all the love and adoration in the world. he lets out a laugh and your face almost twists into hurt when he immediately brings you close by the waist, standing at full height. he reassures you almost immediately.

"stealing my thunder again huh sweetheart?" he jokes, a smile on his face. it's hard to stay mad at him, especially with that face— trying your best to keep a stoic face while he speaks. "i was supposed to say it first." he pouts. and you shake your head, a smile peeking from your lips but you remain. he brings his hand to cup your cheek and the other on the small of your back. "but i couldn't have said it better than you. you're the only one i think understands me the best, you see right through me and can tell if i'm having a bad day or hiding something. you supported me through my football career especially when my parents seemed like they cared more about the sport than their own son. you defend me, protect me— even though i feel like i should be doing that with you. you make me feel special. i love you and i always wanted to tell you that. no matter what you do, make me sad or mad. i'll always love you."

you flush at his words, feeling small in his embrace. your feelings have never felt so strong and it honestly felt a little overwhelming, but seeing the smile on his face eases you. you lean into his touch, your throat tightening at the new thoughts looming your mind.

"what if i'm not good enough for you.” your voice comes out strained, strong with emotion. he interjects immediately. insisting that there was no one else out that that could change his mind. you were it for him. he pours his heart out to you and you the same.  a smile graces you face and wally swears his heart melts. he'll do anything to protect that smile on your face til the day he dies... again.

"it's me and you against the world, sweetheart." he kisses the crown of your head, taking your hand and pulling you down the hall. maybe death isn’t so bad after all.

ownership of starrvsn. please do not repost, modify or translate.

#wally clark #wally clark imagines #wally clark fanfiction #school spirits #school spirits wally clark #wally clark x reader #school spirits fanfiction #milo manheim #milo manheim fanfiction #star's galaxy !

[ohimsummer]

omg so. idk if you keep getting these ads all over snapchat and stuff like i have, but i keep seeing those ads for these lil thongs that have ur man’s name along the back. and every time i see them, my FIRST thought is imagine wearing those for satoru or suguru lmao

— minors dni, geto x afab! reader, pet names (sugar, darling), light degradation, suguru possession kink going brrrr, mentions of biting/marking/creampie, established relationship :3

⭑ ࣪ ˖ sum’z notes.ᐟ i went w/ suguru bc i like writing about speedrunning through breaking that man’s composure 🤭 and also satoru’s was sounding repetitive but I think HE’D buy them for you to begin with😭

“darling, have you seen my–“

the question is a dying ember in suguru’s throat, and his silence prompts your curious gaze at him through the reflection. you’re tilted over his bathroom sink to get a closer look at yourself in the mirror, finishing up your nightly routine.

“seen your what, sugar?”

your boyfriend doesn’t answer the question. instead he eyes the bottom of your ass that peeks out from beneath your (his) shirt. surely you haven’t been prancing your pretty self around his apartment in just a shirt?

his hand approaches the hem of the top. “uhm, what are you–“ and you squeak out an ‘oop!’ as geto lifts the fabric to expose your behind. a huff seeps from your lips, faux annoyance as you massage face wash into your cheeks. “jeez, babe, at least take me to dinner, first.”

after getting no response, you prod at him further. “okay, suguru, i know the view back there is amazing but for real, what did you come in here for again?” still no answer. you pout at him through the mirror, though geto never sees your expression as his eyes are tangled in the words branded on your underwear.

‘why are you wearing these?’

‘where did you get them?’

‘you’re teasing me with this, aren’t you?’

all questions that die on his tongue, because how could he possibly get his thoughts together with all this blood rushing to the wrong head?

“oh, do you like my new thong? ordered it online, just for you.”

and god, you and that playful taunt, wiggling your ass as you giggle so nonchalantly. like this sexy little thong with suguru’s name on the band isn’t sending all his composure straight out the window. fist balled up in the t-shirt, it’s taking everything in him not to rip these damned panties off you. no, no, he needed them perfect and intact for the pictures he wanted to take later, after he’s done stuffing your slutty ass with cock and cum and painting your pussy white.

“you do these things just to get a rise out of me, don’t you?” geto finally sighs, pulling at the thin excuse for underwear right where his title resides; he tugs it back, gets a good eyeful of his name and it almost makes his brain go haywire. it elicits the same feeling as when he sees day-old hickeys on your neck—a ‘she’s mine’ so everyone knows the most gorgeous girl in the world is already spoken for. geto loves showing off that you’re his in all kinds of ways: you in his clothes, with his teeth indentations on your body, or bruises from his lips, hands clutching at your hips or an arm around your waist.

“suguru,” you set down your towel, face fully dry and you back up to press yourself against his front. “i’ve no idea what you’re on about.” your giggles and the knowing grin on your face say otherwise. “but i’m assuming you do like them, yeah? it’s like our own little secret.” and you grind your ass against the growing bulge in his pants, just a little something to send his heart racing even faster.

and, oh, he likes them alright. anything that says you’re his and suguru’s down for it. and if that includes having his cum drooling from every hole in your body, so be it.

tagz: @anthoosies

#geto x reader #geto suguru smut #suguru geto drabble #jjk imagine #suguru geto imagine #jjk x reader #suguru x reader #Jjk drabble #.𖥔 summy answerz .ᐟ ๋࣭ ⭑ #⋆｡ﾟ☁︎ summy is thinking . . . ｡⋆ #anon! ‎♡‧₊˚

[celestiababie]

sebongs reacting to you having a tight wap hehe

A/N: I let out a chuckle at the phrasing of this... If there are typos...oops! I did not proof read this but I hope you enjoy it anyway! As always, feedback is ALWAYS welcomed and encouraged. I love reading what people have to say. Kinda felt like this got repetitive but the over all theme is that I think they'd cum quick lol

Update: Tumblr deleted Wonwoo's...it's here now

Seungcheol : This man would let out the sexiest grunt as soon as he slips inside of you and wouldn't be able to hold back from pounding you...good luck walking the next day

Jeonghan : His eyes would roll back and he'd let out a hiss before smirking at you and telling you how turned on you are for him in the smuggest ass voice smh But you'd see him lose that smug composure every few seconds, mouthing curses and trying his hardest to not let you know how he was losing his mind

Joshua : He'd probably take a second to admire how much you're glistening and finger fuck you before jerking himself off with your arousal that coated his fingers. And then he'd lose his mind when he slips inside of you hehe

Jun : A choked out moan (kind of high pitched) would leave his throat and he'd have to pace himself and would constantly switch positions in order not to cum...but would end up switching you into positions that make you even tighter

Soonyoung : This man is so incredibly turned on by how turned on you are and how tight you are. He would not be able to stop blabbering on about how good it feels which does fuel your ego

Wonwoo: Wonwoo would be so entranced when he slips his fingers into you the first time. How you felt around his fingers, the sounds of you gushing before he even made you cum. He'd probably take a second to put his glasses back on so he can stare at how your arousal coated his fingers and dripped out of you

Jihoon : The look of pure concentration on Jihoon's face would be humorous and hot at the same time. You know the look...his eyes closed with his brows furrowed, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he focuses on how warm you feel gripping his cock

Dokyeom : I truly believe that some good pussy is all this man needs to unleash his inner freak and it would be as if a flip would switch in him the second he bottomed out inside of you. He wouldn't be able to hold back his rough and deep thrusts, his eyes rolled back in pure bliss as he chased after his climax

Mingyu : Poor baby would let out the sexiest moan before darting his eyes back and forth between your own and where the two of you connected as if he couldn't believe how good you felt. He'd probably ask for a second or two to regain himself (he didn't want to bust quick lol) before fucking you a bit slower than he would normally like

Minghao : If you find deep breathing sexy...good for you! Minghao's head would be buried in your neck, the only noises heard were your moans, the lewd sounds of him thrusting into you and his deep long breaths as he tried to control every ounce of himself to make it last as long as possible

Seungkwan : He would NOT be able to keep his mouth closed at all. Either his jaw would be dropped in awe or whines and moans would be escaping him every few seconds (he'd be particularly whiny if it was a position where you were on top fucking yourself with his cock)

Vernon : Gets surprisingly vocal and tried to stop even more noises from coming out by biting down on his lip...hard. He'd kind of have this look every now and again of being in utter disbelief that something could feel this good. He might cum early but will apologize and make it up to you

Chan : If you want this man to shut up, good luck trying. He has a filthy mouth which he'd use to moan and whisper the dirtiest praise you could imagine. It'd be a good distraction for him not to cum too early but he'd start to get...turned on by his own words and it would make him focus on how wet and tight you were...and then his words would get shaky and yeah....he's not gonna be able to hold out for much longer

#asks #svt asks #svt #seventeen #svt smut #seventeen smut #svt reactions #seventeen reaction #svt x reader #seventeen x reader #🌌:celestialworks

[iwantjaketosullyme]

𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞 ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ᴘᴀʀᴛ Ⅰ: ᴀɴ ᴀɴɢᴇʟ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏʀɪᴢᴏɴ

➺ pairing: aged up!lo'ak x metkayina!reader (fluff) ➺ series summary: lovesick!lo'ak does all he can to win the heart of oblivious!reader ➺ chapter summary: ❝ eyes of liquid gold meet their aquamarine match and just like that, he is smitten ❞ (w/c: 1.6k) ➺ warnings: death (as a joke), drowning (for like 2secs) a/n: ♪ and they call it puppy loveee ♪ i strongly believe that lo'ak's goofy ass is ultimate rom-com material !! i decided to make it a mini-series so buckle up ! a couple yrs hv passed since the sea battle with the recoms so everyone's older. na'vi dictionary at the end :)

𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭┃𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 »

─────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───────

C’mon bro, strong heart. No fear. Ride.

Strong heart. No fear. Ride.

Strong heart. No fear. Ri-

“Try not to get yourself killed this time, okay skxawng?”

Aonung’s grating voice carries over the cacophonous sound of waves crashing against one another, cutting through Lo’ak’s train of repetitive self-affirmations. Himself and the son of the Olo’eyktan had become close friends since they reached an understanding in the most unlikely of ways, after Ao’nung had left him for dead outside of the reef five years ago.

In spite of this, they had never quite managed to shake off the ‘love to hate them’ aspect of their relationship – directed insults now only meant to tease rather than injure and once-venomous rivalry now harmless. In this moment, however, Lo’ak fights the urge to let his intrusive thoughts win, images of wringing Ao’nung's neck coming to mind. At last, he had been approved to begin his tsurak training and he refused to allow fish lips to ruin it for him.

Refocusing on the task at hand, Lo’ak inhales deeply and resumes repeating his mantra mentally. His dad had advised him that a good pep talk was the key to having the fortified mindset of a Marine. Oorah. Desperate to tame a tsurak and get one step closer to completing his iknimaya, for once in his life, Lo’ak was willing to listen.

He merely scoffs at Ao’nung’s taunting words and inhales deeply, preparing to mount the tsurak. Lo’ak clears his mind, rolls his shoulders.You got this. He ignores when her extended tail whips the water’s surface, aggravated at being pinioned by Ao’nung and a few other Metkayina men. Ignores her beady eyes following him closely as he nears her jerking body, it is as if she is daring him to come any closer – you really want to risk riding me? 

Gathering all the courage he is expected to possess as son of the mighty Toruk Makto, Lo’ak swiftly connects his kuru to that of the tsurak’s before swinging a long leg over the thick of her body and shuffling up to seat himself properly, hands gripping the attached harness.

Amber eyes widen as he feels the rush of being in control of such a powerful creature. Strong jaws snap dangerously at the men that still hold her in their secure grip, overwhelmed by the presence of an unfamiliar rider in her mind. Just about managing to muster enough mental force to overcome her resistance, Lo’ak’s mouth opens to release a loud ‘Forward!’

Thinking in tandem with her rider, the tsurak involuntarily follows his command and breaks free from her restrictors. Bounding across the surface of the water, Lo’ak barely has a moment to rejoice in his minor victory before he is dragged underwater forcefully, the tsurak’s capable form thrashing wildly beneath his thighs.

Back on the shore, Ao’nung smirks to himself as he watches Lo’ak’s gangly legs flail in the air as they follow the rest of his body under the water. He must have forgotten to tell him that Niie was particularly picky with who she let ride her and therefore required gentle coaxing before any attempt to even climb her, nevermind ride. Oops.

Niie’s decorated wings tuck into her sides as she penetrates the water’s surface, sleek torpedo shape nimbly navigating the waters that she knows so well. Intelligent creature that she is, she allows Lo’ak a moment of reprieve, slowing down slightly to lull him into a false sense of security.

Unbeknownst to him, her mission to shake him off is not abandoned, only paused temporarily. He allows himself to enjoy the high of speeding through the water with such velocity, adrenaline rushing through his veins. As Niie emerges to the surface to allow him to breathe again, wings unfurling to their full span, he pumps his arm in the air and lets out a triumphant "Hell yeah!"

Gaining confidence in his abilities, he shifts into a crouch atop Niie’s back as she glides through the air, planting his feet in what he thinks to be a secure stance. I can’t wait to see the look on Ao’nung’s stupid face, he thinks to himself smugly, picturing his friend’s disbelieving stare.

Ever since passing his own iknimaya the previous year, the Metkayina boy had become utterly insufferable. Well, more than he usually was. Hearing his thoughts, Niie decides this is the perfect time to humble him and regain her freedom. 

Quicker than he can say ‘Great Mother help me’, Niie plunges back into the depths of water, using all her might to wriggle and writhe under his grip that had begun to become lax as he succumbed to his distractions. Pure shock courses through his body, causing him to open his mouth and gulp down one mouthful of water too many, tail whipping violently in the surrounding water.

It soon becomes all too much for him as he feels the movements mess with his equilibrium and trigger a dizziness that causes him to lose his hold on the harness entirely. Silly boy, Niie thinks to herself as she dashes away. This ain’t my first rodeo.

Lungs burning from overexertion, Lo’ak swims upwards and takes an indulgent breath of fresh air. Miffed by recent events, he treads water and decides to stay out at sea, wishing to allow as much time as possible to pass before he does the lengthy swim of shame back to the village. As he languishes in his feelings, his eyes wander across the open water, thinking of ways to pass the time.

He spots an unmistakable flash of blue in the corner of his eye, squinting as he tries to decipher what exactly he is looking at. Casually, he eases forward and manages to make out two blue feet, toes pointed daintily towards the sky before they are swallowed by the waves.  

Intrigued, he fills his lungs up to their full capacity before ducking under the water again, feet kicking rapidly to aid him in his pursuit of his new curiosity. His interest is peaked again when he takes in your figure, equally as close to him as you are far. Outstretched arms scoop copious amounts of water, your streamlined tail helping to propel you further with each stroke.

When you seem to be satisfied with your spot in the water, you come to a halt and let your limbs float freely in the water. Eager to find out what a young Metkayina like you is doing so far out from the village by herself, Lo’ak also stops a little ways away from you. He chooses not to reveal his presence, for now. Saves him the embarrassing explanation of what he’s doing here, he figures.

Nothing could have prepared him for the spectacle he observes in front of him. The arms at your side begin to lift slowly as your head tips back into the space behind you, the rest of your body following suit in what looks to be an underwater backflip of sorts. The most graceful backflip he’s ever seen.

Hydrobatics so graceful it would put an ilu to shame, he watches you perform a myriad of wonders, body following the intricate steps to a piece of choreography only you and the waters around you are privy to. 

When the rays of light from above the surface filter through the water and touch your body at just the right angle, his reaction is near enough comical. For a moment, he believes he is bearing witness to a divine vision from Eywa. You must be an apparition, a trick of the eyes.

He fists his hands, brings them up to his face and rubs his eyes twice. Sure enough, you are still there. When he opens his eyes again and sees your lithe form in motion, he blinks twice in disbelief but wills his eyes to stay open so that he can take in as much of your ethereal beauty as possible.

And take it in he does. Greedy eyes devour the sight of you, noticing more details the longer he looks. The blue and lilac strands of your macrame top remind him of the elaborate vein pattern of the diaphanous txampaysye, renowned for its natural elegance in the waters. But while those magnificent creatures helped Na’vi to breathe underwater, he felt that you left him breathless.

He thinks of the tawtute romcom movies from the science base he would force Neteyam and Tuk to watch with him back when they were in the rainforest. They were his guilty pleasure and no matter how much he begged her to, Kiri absolutely refused to watch them; she said Grace had expressly mentioned in one of her many video logs that they lacked real humour and were painfully unrealistic.

But as you sense that you are no longer alone, you turn around. Eyes of liquid gold meet their aquamarine match and just like that, he is smitten. I knew love at first sight existed outside of the movies, he thinks to himself.

He’d heard the story of how his sa’nok wanted to kill his sempul the first time they met so many times, he’d begun to think that was the norm. But if Lo’ak was going to do anything, it’s go against the norm and prove everyone wrong.

Enraptured by the very essence of your being, he forgets himself and his surroundings. Moved by the newfound joy that comes with finally finding the one you were destined to be with, he opens his mouth and starts laughing. For the hundredth time that day, he is shocked when water starts to fill it, precious air escaping his lungs.

His body is exhausted from multiple counts of shock in too little time, and so he begins to drown. Limbs akimbo, panicked eyes meet yours and as you make your way towards him with haste, seeing your divinity in such close proximity causes him to descend further into the throes of a fit. Kind eyes observe his state of distress with worry and as he gazes into them deeply, he knows he’s a goner in more ways than one. 

─────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───────

na’vi dictionary

skxawng - idiot // tsurak - skimwing // iknimaya - rite of passage to become an adult in a na'vi clan // kuru - na'vi neural whip, queue // toruk makto - rider of last shadow // txampaysye - gill mantle // tawtute - sky person, sky people // sa’nok - mother // sempul - father

© iwantjaketosullyme tumblr 2023

☼ 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵:

@heirtothekingdom , @bebkyu , @amiah24 , @inlovewithpandora , @alathan13 , @girlnred , @ggujkie , @aemondhoe , @malandrinhass , @itsyagirl01 , @mookiepookiesblog , @idekstopasking , @thelxnelyworld , @whitch123 , @camila-alejandra26

𝘭𝘮𝘬 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰/𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 <3

#✦•·.· 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘴 ·.·•✦ #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak fic #lo'ak imagine #lo'ak fluff #lo'ak x fem!reader #lo'ak fanfiction #avatar x reader #avatar imagine #avatar fanfiction #avatar #atwow x reader #atwow fluff #avatar: twow #avatar x metkayina!reader

[marleyybluu]

The Nanny

Part 4

Rio x fem!reader

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: angst (I think lol), our favourite couple part their ways for now, Nick being a nosey weirdo, sad Rio, sad reader. Idk I think that’s it.

A/N: I know this is a bit short and (surprise) no smut lol but we will get there dw. this is (kind of) a filler. Also if you’re new, check out my master list for parts 1-3 ❤️cus I’m too lazy to link them here lmao oops

It'd been two weeks since Y/n's encounter with the blonde lady. Elizabeth. Her name was Elizabeth. She noticed it at the top of the ultrasound. That ultrasound felt like it was forever engraved in her mind. She hadn't talked to Rio about it yet, she didn't know if she wanted to. Y/n wasn't really an angry or confrontational person, but when it came to it, she could explode and if it was going to be like that she didn't want Marcus to hear anything.

So, until then, she played her part as usual. Well, the affection she delivered had shortened, and that was very noticeable for Rio. They were practically living in each other's skin half the time and now he suddenly felt cold and that's what she wanted.

"Y/n." She felt something poking her hip, she blinked a few times zoning back in and looking down to see poor Marcus attempting to receive her attention. "Sorry, honey, what's going on?"

"Nothing, I just wanted to put my plate in the sink." She shifted over allowing him access to the sink, she continued to wash the dishes and hummed a tune that was repetitive in her head. "Do you know when Daddy will be home?"

She shook her head. "No idea bud." Suddenly there was a knock on the door, Y/n turned off the water and dried her hands lightly jogging through the short hallway to get to the door. She held her breath as she unlocked the door and pulled it open. "Oh, hi." It was Rio's brother... cousin... whichever. "Hey... you." She awkwardly greeted him, she forgot his name. He chuckled reaching out his hand, "Nick."

"Right, Nick, sorry." She shook his hand, a little longer than she wanted to, his grip was a little tight on her. "What can I help you with?"

"Is my brother here?"

Y/n smirked. "Thought he was your cousin." He was amused.  "Anyway, he's not here yet but he should be home soon if you want to wait for him." She stepped aside inviting him inside the house, she closed the door behind him. He took off his shoes and wandered off at the sound of Marcus' voice. "Uncle Nick!"

"Hey buddy, what's going on? What are you watching?"

"Bluey."

Y/n chimes in. "As always. And remember our deal, after this episode, you hit the shower and hit your bed okay?"

Marcus pouted and delivered those sweet brown puppy eyes. "What about Dad?" She groaned internally, he had school tomorrow and she did not need him to be up all night and end up sleeping in the next day. "I'll send him upstairs as soon as he's through that door okay?"

"Okay." He agreed and sat back down on the couch. She turned over to Nick and smiled. "Would you like anything?" He put his hand up and shook his head. "I couldn't intrude like that."

She reassured him that it was fine, suggesting there was water, juice and wine to choose from. He chose wine. He followed her trail back to the kitchen, he sat on one of the stools and waited patiently, watching her squat down behind the island to reach into a cabinet where she kept her special drinks. She then walked over to the upper cabinets and reached for a glass, her shirt slipping up exposing a bit of her skin, a small silly tattoo of Snoopy sitting on her hip as her sweatpants were almost dangerously low. His tongue swiped across his bottom lip.

She turned back placing the glass on the counter and poured out some liquor. "Not too much gotta drive back."

She hummed and nodded.

"You're okay?" Nick asked. She'd never talked to Nick, had no intention of speaking to him ever again since the dinner at their grandmother's house and judging how stiff Rio acted towards him she didn't really want to expose the problem at hand. So she bit her tongue and nodded.

Well, maybe she didn't bite hard enough.

"Actually, can I ask something?"

"Yeah."

Her nostrils widened as she angrily exhaled through her nose. "Has Rio ever..." Sigh. "When he was with Maria, and she was pregnant... was he sleeping with other people? Or bringing other women around?"

He thought about and she couldn't tell if he was going to save his ass or throw him under the bus. "I mean, they weren't really together when Maria was pregnant, so he still had other women around yeah."

"Okay." She simply replied looking at her wine glass, twirling it around at the stem, the red liquid swishing and swooshing with every movement it almost became hypnotizing. Her ears rang as scenarios filled her head. Was she the other woman that was around? How come no one in his family said anything? Do they not know?

Nick noticed how quiet she was and the coping mechanism she developed sitting there, he gently placed his hand over hers and she stopped playing with the glass. "Are you..."

"No," She quickly answered. "No, I mean I wouldn't be drinking."

Duh. He thought to himself but he had to ask anyway. He leaned forward attempting to pry more out of her without giving himself away. "Do you think-"

She cut him off. "Maria said that when you think you're the only one you're not and-"

Not too much.

"Fuck, I don't know it just got me thinking. And now I'm overthinking."

Before he could reply to her statement Marcus repeatedly squealed.  "Daddy's home! Daddy's home! Y/n! Daddy's home!"

She smiled at his cheery tone. "So I've heard."

Rio's figure came to join the duo in the kitchen, an overgrown Marcus sitting on his hip, just a small reminder that he'd forever be his baby. A very apparent frown played on his face while his eyes darted between her and Nick. "Hey, pretty mama." Immediately asserting his dominance.

"Hi." She nodded before taking another sip of her wine. "Nick... why are you in my kitchen?" He asked with hostility lacing his voice. Nick smirked, always smug at how immediately defensive Rio seemed to get whenever he came around. "Just came to see you, little brother."

Y/n cleared her throat standing up from her seat, she reached out for Marcus who easily transferred over to her, he was reluctant to leave his dad at first, not seeing him all day and only getting a minute with him made him a bit sad, but after a promise from Rio that he'd be up to at least read a story he cooperated and clung to Y/n as she took him upstairs.

While they were getting ready, Y/n's mind couldn't help but wonder about how she'd bring up the situation at hand, the envelope had been tucked under her side of the mattress for a while, maybe that's why she had trouble sleeping too it was taunting her underneath where she lay. She felt a bit of guilt, it was wrong for her to keep this a secret from him, he had the right to know he was having another kid.

Huh.

Another kid.

And it's not with her.

She sighed shaking off the thought, putting it on the back burner for a bit to focus on whatever Roblox game Marcus was trying to teach her to play on his iPad. She couldn't understand why these kids were so into this thing, he was obsessed. He rested his head on her shoulder while she tapped away on the screen. Her character disappeared and respawned in a moment. "What did I do?"

"Someone killed you." He giggled, and she gasped playfully poking his side. "That's not funny, I don't know what I'm doing." She laughed. He took his iPad back showing her once more what to do, a slight knock against the door frame interrupted their time together. Marcus sighed knowing he had to put his device away so he handed it back to her to take downstairs and in the morning he could have it back during breakfast.

Rio smiled. "Picked a book yet?"

Marcus nodded reaching under his pillow and showing him. "Say goodnight to Y/n."

"Night Y/n."

She kissed his head. "Night sweetness. I'll see you when I see you." Strange, Rio thought to himself, she always said she'll see him in the morning.

She walked past Rio, avoiding even an inch of contact with him. He swore he felt a cold air as she passed by, her loving and warmth had suddenly been replaced. Rio poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue and nodded. "Cool, let's uh, start reading."

---

By the time y/n got downstairs Nick had long disappeared, she sighed placing the yellow envelope on the counter after retrieving it from their room. She needed another glass of wine if she was ever going to get through this. She sat on the stool around the Island and twirled her wine glass once again, staring blankly at it until the sound of descending footsteps brought her back to Earth. "How was your day?" He asked opening the fridge and looking for something to drink or at least snack on.

"Good,"

Sip.

"How was yours?" Her tone was cold and uninterested so he responded with the same simple answer she gave him. "Good."

The silence returned aside from the obnoxious tapping of her fingers against her phone screen. He knew her well enough, when she was making extra noise on purpose she was pissed. Rio shook his head. "What was Nick doing here?"

The tapping stopped. "Came to say hi." She answered placing her phone down on the counter and picking up her wine glass. "Why are you talking to me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you want to pick a fight."

She chuckled pettily. "Hm."

"Y/n-"

"Who's Elizabeth?" She asked finally lifting her head up to look at him, he froze and audibly swallowed. "She's a business partner."

"Is she?" Y/n questioned with a trembling voice. She slid the envelope over to him as he took a seat next to her. "Open it,"

He was lowkey starting to sweat. He fumbled with the envelope until it opened, he reached inside and pulled out the evidence. His eyes fell out of his head and rolled onto the shiny clean floor. "Y/n..."

"Congratulations, I guess." She shrugged. He looked up at the name double checking if it was really Beth's. There's no way this was fucking happening. He'd admit they had their fair share of encounters, maybe one before he met Y/n but there was no way that it resulted in this. She would've told him, or at least he'd hoped she would.

This looked bad, there was no way to weasel out of this when the evidence was right there. What made everything more uneasy is how calm Y/n was being, any other woman would have thrown their wine at him or knocked him with the bottle but she downed the last of the liquid and poured whatever was left of the bottle.

"You think it's a boy or a girl?" She laughed tipsily. "This isn't funny."

"You're right," She sipped. "It's not, but you know... when you've been crying about it for two weeks, you just run out of tears and all you can do is laugh."

She continued. "You laugh and you wonder how you fell so fucking foolishly in love with someone, in such a short time... how in that short time he made you feel so special like you were his world. You fall in love with his son, the sweetest boy you've ever met who tugs at your heart everyday and you think to yourself maybe one day you can give this kid his own little best friend."

Rio dropped his head. "And you come to find out, that- that someone else beat you to it. Is that how you did Maria? I mean she- she told me I'm not the only one, Christopher can never have one girl and I fucking defended you. I was so fucking sure-"

Y/n's voice cracked, and her chin trembled as she fought back a flood of tears but they were no longer tears of sadness, they were angry. Pissed. "I was so fucking sure you wouldn't do that to me."

He didn't know what to say, his mouth ran dry. "I'm... baby, I'm sorry. Look at me, look at me," He put the picture down and grabbed her face forcing her to look at him. Her eyes were so sad, so tired, so broken. He'd never seen her like this, he couldn't believe he was the cause.

"I love you... Y/n. I swear to god, I fucking love you ma. I'm sorry, okay? But you're going to have to believe me when I say this ain't my kid. There's no way. I-it's just been you and me this whole time, baby, I fucking swear."

She sniffled. She could see it, or maybe she just wanted to see it. That he did love her and some part of him was telling her the truth, but bless her heart she didn't know what to believe. It was too much, maybe she moved too fast and this was her consequence, didn't ask enough questions when they started dating and now this was the result. She loved him. God she loved him. Her whole body gravitated towards him and it was so hard to pull away when she found out.

It was hard to pull away now, how close they were in proximity, noses almost touching, foreheads pressed together. He didn't want to let go, this was something he was willing to go to war for. Against her better judgement, she leaned forward connecting their lips.

The love, the regret, the sorrow was all wrapped up in it. Ugh, he tasted like alcohol, probably took a shot before he came home. He smelt so good even after a long day. His lips were so soft, so sweet to her and extra gentle. Their kiss started slow and soon picked up feverishly, she pulled at his shirt, the sudden need for him took over. The two sides of her brain knocked at each other, sleep with him tonight and leave in the morning or leave now and never see him again— let this kiss be the last.

Beep! Beep!

Someone else was there to answer for her. She pulled back but he brought her in, one last kiss. Just one. Y/n pulled back, tugging his hands away from her and she immediately missed them. She stood up and grabbed her keys off the counter. "I made Marcus' lunch... oh, you know the routine."

"Y/n... ma, please..."

She kissed his cheek. "Tell him I'll see him soon, okay?"

"No." He protested. "He can see you tomorrow, in the morning."

"Christopher."

"Y/n."

She wasn't about to argue with him, her sister blowing up her phone letting her know she was outside and to hurry the fuck up. She backed away as slowly as she could, his jaw flexed and his eyes became glossy. He was going to cry. She couldn't watch it otherwise she'd stay and she just needed the space right now. She quickly made her way down the hall with him hot on her trail, she opened the door and wiped a tear that ran down her cheek.

Her sister caught sight of Rio and shook her head. Y/n went on the passenger side.

Just one last glance.

She ducked down and sat, closing the car door. She turned away from her sibling not wanting to be bothered by anyone right now. Understandable.

Rio watched as the car disappeared, the gravel under the tires crunching as she vanished before him. He stood there, dumbfounded. He's fucked up a lot but never like this.

He needed a way to resolve this and he needed it now.

If you liked this fic, feel free to like this fic. Comments and reblogs are appreciated.

See you in the next one. Peace and love✌🏾

🏷️ : @darqchilddaydreamz @rio-reid-whoreee @bigenergy777 @christinabae @corpsebridenightamare @prettylilsapphic @realhotgurlshit @being-worthy @skyesthebomb

#rio x fem!reader #rio #goodgirls #rio fanfic #marleysfanfictions #marleywrites #good girls rio #rio good girls #rio x reader #the nanny #angst #heartbreak

[ivy-is-fine]

Reacting to the Wish soundtrack!

before I watch the movie!

At All Costs

:o a love song?!

title feels more like a villain song

pretty good

Love characters that are ride or die for each other

cant be a Disney movie without a classic love story

cute, but a little repetitive

This Wish

it doesn’t really have good rhythm

”throw caution to every warning sign” ?

wait hang on what are you wishing for

ooo so the town is suffering!

gasp, is she gonna lead a revolution?!

oh sudden change in tempo. Ew.

hm. So there must be a tyrannical leader causing “us” to suffer and/or lack the ability to thrive

I’m A Star

meh

not a fan of the background instruments compared to the voices

i I have no clue what’s happening

main character feeling down and the “us” are helping her get back up?

no freaking clue

”so your dust is my dust, fantastic!” Lmao

idk it just feels really plastic

sounds like something I would hear in vacation bible school

no

This Is The Thanks I Get?!

A villain song! :0 I love villain songs. Let’s hope this one measures up

funky aaa beat

egomaniac

HOLD UP

”I got these genes from outer space” IS THE ANTAGONIST AN ALIEN WOAHHHH SUPER HYPED NOW

low key kinda cringe tho

hang on, what about clothes on Benito’s back???

whos henry

“I let you live here free and I don’t even charge you rent” you just said the same thing twice buddy. Villain not bad? Villain… give free housing to people?

I know it’s an unreliable narrator, but like. if he’s doing what he’s doing I don’t think he’s that bad

maybe not final boss?

just wants respect? Hang on, why aren’t you getting respect?

main chorus isn’t bad, kinda meh

egomainac

disneys poor attempt at using recent slang

background chorus is getting on my nerves

shut yo bitch ass whining up

maybe this is the song where he snaps

oop

hes snapping

suddenly chill? BUT SUPER SPOOKY HUH

meh

I’ll make part two in a little bit, hopefully this doesn’t leave me disappointed in the great monopoly Disney has become.

#wish 2023 #disney wish #wish #i think the one guy said his name was magnifico #Which is a little cliche #But I’ll let it pass #bc it’s silly #and I love little sillies

[what-in-the-gloobie-glob]

Heavy mw3 spoilers (tagging bc its only been a day since full access) soap/interactions characters had with soap

Before the rest of the post I just want to say that I am aware that news has been going around that the game ended up getting rushed due to activision pushing dates(?) Or whatever (idk I haven't read into it)

I have an actual problem with soap's death. And I mean, I feel like it might have been more acceptable for everyone (including die hard cod boys or whatever) if there was more purpose to it. Or even if it was just... more cinematic (?)

It was so lackluster, and I understand the whole "It's supposed to be realistic" but it's a game. The entire point of it is to be entertaining, it doesn't matter if it isn't realistic, because it's supposed to immerse and entertain the viewer,and catch their attention. This death... was not that. Infact it was any thing but that.

It didn't even feel like there was an out of game purpose for it. If it had been at the beginning of the game, at least then the game could have been "revenge" driven. You put it from anyone's pov and (without even making it gay) you could have an emotional drive for revenge. (Of course I AM going to make it gay because that who I am). And if it's kept at the end of the game they could just play up the cinematics a tiny bit, and boom, payer satisfaction. But nope

Now lets go back to if it was the beginning of the game. I'm only gonna focus of the remaining main 3 of the 141.

If soap died at the beginning, the game could be largely price's pov. And we already know in the original price saw soap as a son figure. So just copy+paste character dynamics, and oop, you've got a more immersive emotional connection that draws the players in. It gives the character (price) a motivation, which can also explain some of the OOC behaviors that are exhibited in the game. Because Price is supposed to be this confident, level-headed leader. And the entire game he feels off, unsure of his own decisions, and he makes decisions that arguably are illogical for someone of his rank to make.

Onto Gaz. He seemed too stoic, and cold for this game. If soap had died at the beginning, it could be explained by him being angry and vengeful, and shutting off his emotions. Think about it, he lost a fellow Sergent, whom he'd thought of as a brother. That does things to a person. But they didn't do that so we just got what feels to be an ooc gaz, with minimal interaction with soap who he called a brother. Now I realize that calling soap his brother could just be a term of endearment or whatever, but it anything it felt like a desperate grab to make a last connection between the player and the character by showing a "deeper" connection (which wasn't there). As a side note, when I say gaz feels ooc I mean that in mw it seemed (to me) that he thought about his actions more and their impacts. He didn't just follow orders blindly like a good little soldier, like in this movie. In mw he was more self-righteous (if that's the right word) and he seemed to care a lot more for how his actions would have an impact on the world/people that he was fighting for.

And then we have Ghost. And sorry to sound repetitive but the interactions with him and soap were lackluster. We can start with the fact that there was very little interaction between the two, much less than in mw2 obviously, but I just want to point out that it ALMOST feels like Shepherd had more screen time than the two did together (to me). I know that that isn't true but that's how it feels. And we have even less meaningful interactions. Sure we have ghost and soap interrogating milena but they didn't interact all that much, and we have SOME banter but not a lot. We also have ghost claiming soap to go with him before they drop onto the island, and them pairing up after the vidcall with Shepherd and graves. But that's basically it, aside from soap's death scene (not including the flashvack because they didn't really interact much/the same way). Also I don't know if anyone else felt like this but to me it felt like their banter/interactions were too stilted/formal for the level of acquaintance that they are. Especially after Las Almas, and the game implies that they have fallen into a routine of going on missions together since then, and their conversations/interactions don't feel like they're at that level of knowledge of eachother that they should be at.

I'm putting soap's actual death and aftermath here since I have misc. thoughts.

I want to point out the parallel between laswell and hew wife disapproval with smoking, and Ghost with johnny (i know it's veen pointed out before) but it basically confirms soapghost/ghoap

Also ive seen it pointed out that ghost checked soap's pulse to check if he was alive, even after he was shot in the head, he also pats soap chest like he's teying to confort him.

I also want to point out that at no point between soap dying and the bomb does ghost say anything about the bomb, nor does he go gelp gaz stop it. I get that the point is to force the player to stop the bomb, but they could have added it as a non-canon ending where he was too late or off time with gaz and thus the bomb still blew up. But no. He just says by soap's body the entire time...

Ghost was also apparently the one in possession of soap's ashes, AND the one to spread his ashes, which seems too intimate if activision was trying to stomp down ghoap.

Also I thought soap was catholic, so in my mind, I would have expected maybe a small (possibly unmarked) grave, instead of cremation (im not entirely sure on catholic funeral rituals, so don't come at me if this is wrong). And to me soap's character seemed like it should have been buried instead of cremated and forgotten to the wind (personal preference) but I think he should have had some spot on earth that was his to remember him.

And I'm not gonna say the ashes scene was lackluster, or rushed. Because it wasn't, but it did feel like it was an emotional grab. And it just felt off in general.

Ok that's all I have

#call of duty mw3 #mw3 spoilers #mwiii spoilers #cod mwiii #cod mw3 #mwiii #mw3 #call of duty #john soap mactavish #captain john price #simon ghost riley #kyle gaz garrick #soapghost #ghostsoap

[artobotsrollout]

Hissy Sparkling Headcanon: Communication

Until Sparklings are adjusted to compassionate parenting, they often are only heard making noises of complaint or defensiveness. However it has been recorded that some sparklings will form groups and they'll have their own little trills, whistles, honks, and beeps that mean different things. When they are more accustomed to a gentle parent they make a great deal more noise.

There's many many noises a sparkling will make with a wide range of meanings. And depending on their development the same sounds might sound different between sparklings. Here are just a few:

One noise that I like to think Hissy Sparklings make is similar to baby Alligators: LINK. Little pew pew noises. That's often a noise of agreement or acknowledgement. When used in repitition it means the sparkling is trying to grab someone's attention.

They'll make little Boo-oop? Voo-eep! noises to greet someone they like or express excitement.

When they feel safe and relaxed their little engines purr. Imagine a high pitched car engine rumble.

A loud grinding noise is often the precursor to an angry sparkling tantrum.

They'll often sound off a honk noise when they urgently want someone's attention. Aggressive repetitive honking is usually a sparkling being obstinate or throwing a tantrum. One single LOUD honk usually is a big "no!". Often heard as a defensive warning if you approach a feral sparkling too fast.

They are sometimes heard making a whistling noise to themselves when they feel content.

They are also little parrots at times. They'll imitate noises or words they hear similar to human children. The only difference is their ability to mimic is uncanny and often turns into shenanigans. Many a Cybertronian parent with a filthy mouth has been outed by a sparkling repeating a swear word over and over.

Sometimes sibling sparklings will annoy eachother with repetitive beeping, screeching, or honking

Many sparklings make a little mechanical trickling noise when they are thinking or focused. Similar to human tutting or humming.

Happy trills are very common when a sparkling feels happy and safe around a person.

Special Vocal Abilities

Some sparklings are created or develop enhanced vocal abilities naturally. Jazz was a good example of this, he is capable of basically being a one man acapella group and can talk or sing different notes at the same time in multiples of his own voice.

Soundwave and Bumblebee both developed an ability to naturally record and replay the noises in the world around them. A lot of Cybertronians can gain the ability to do similar things due to later life augmentations but it can happen naturally.

Some sparklings learn and develop a noise that is so high pitched that it is painful to the ear as a defense mechanism. These sparklings often will later use these ear piercing ringing noise as a way to throw a tantrum and get what they want. Some create this noise through their vocal processor and others develop it through somewhere else in their body like a siren.

Pre-war caregivers assigned to educate and raise the Medic caste had specific training for this ability since a siren noise was something they often did their best to force a young sparkling to develop for their assigned future career. Ratchet will never admit it but he was a rarer sparkling who developed his siren naturally at an even higher pitch than "desired" at a very young age so he would often harass his assigned caregivers with it.

#artobots headcanons #hissy babies #hissy sparklings #sparklings #headcanons

[cafemilk-tea]

if i have thots for chanliet i also have them for mevie 🫣🤭 i don't want to sound repetitive but since you have out evelyn in a white dress and mingyu with the flowers ppl gave him i just can imagine them being so so so comfortable since they're in europe and fans won't look bad at them (at least not as bad as in korea) so they're balls of energy vibrating excitedly with everything going on with the fw etc BUT when they go back to their hotel (they have separate rooms to keep their outfits and stuff apart but pfffft they sleep together obviously) so i can't stop imagine mingyu whispering stuff like "you look so beautiful in white" "it looks like we have married" while kissing every part of skin that shows when he undresses her just for him manhandling evie and turning her around while caressing and kissing her back 😮‍💨 making her shiver and get x10000 wet and lets out a groan once she realizes that he's going to bang her from behind 🥴🥴

ANA I JUST WOKE UP BABSHWJWIWJWJW PLS I LOVE THE CHANLIET THOTS YOU SEND AND IVE BEEN PATIENTLY WAITING TO BE BLESSED WITH MEVIE THOTS 😩😩😩…. but like imagine they went around pfw holding hands and just being all cute like out in public BC THEY CAN!!!! 🗣️🗣️ photographers wanting all the pictures of the couple bc they are the IT COUPLE 😮‍💨😮‍💨 but no seriously I saw a post talking about how mingyu in one pic looks like he’s going to propose to his girl and his friends were hyping him up and i started FREAKING bc ofc i dressed evie in white 😭😭 (ngl pretty sure i found that dress on a wedding dress site OOP)

now onto the ✨spice✨

‼️nsfw under the cut 🔞 minors dni ‼️

OKAYYYYY now onto the spicy stuff … but i can seriously just imagine them standing in front of one of those mirrors mounted on the wall and mingyu’s starts slowly kissing down her neck and saying those things to her, slowly starting to undress her all the while evie is just humming and agreeing because that’s her man and he looked soo good at fw

when he takes note of how wet she is, he drops to his knees in front of her, taking her leg and throwing it over his shoulder and just eats her out right in front of the mirror so she can watch herself all while he works fingers in and out of her to get her open up enough 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

and when i say that’s one of evie’s favorite positions to be fucked in 🤭🤭🤭 picture it, their hotel room has such a nice view of paris and he’s got her on the bed, facing the window as he just POUNDS into her from behind while she looks out the window at the city below not to mention he’s got her hands behind her back tied up with the tie that he never used at fw (she may or may not have whined a 5 letter word starting with D at one point 🤭) … the light bruising on her hips and the hickeys on her neck the next morning PHEWWW

#ANA PLS SEND MORE THOTS ANYTIME 🙏😵‍💫 #GAWD THIS PROMPT #they had such a night in Paris phewww #i miss u bby 🥺🫶🏻💖 #cafemilk-tea: evelyn #svt.meve #café.minorsDNI

[threadsun]

Fishie asks: "time to be extremely self indulgent, but how do u think the lads stim? i tried looking through u tag to see if youve done that so if u have then OOP but im pretty sure u havent anyways. i love oral stimming via chewing and i keep making clicking noises so i wanna know what kinda stims they would have cause #autismhourswhoupgettingslonkedsilly!!!! - fishie"

Ohohohohoho yesssss it's autism hours!!!!!! I am in awe of their tism!!!!!! I fully headcanon them all as autistic, but especially Ian and Nick~

Also yes I'm back on my ex-ballerina Jean bullshit >:3c

Jack:

Jack hums! Usually just a simple, repetitive tune or a single note if he's not paying attention. When he's really happy, he'll typically just have a low droning hum going in the back of his throat constantly. He also bounces in place, especially when he's excited or otherwise full of energy. He keeps it to a minimum if his bouncing would cause problems (like jostling someone in his lap), but he's a bouncy boy!

Ian:

Taptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptap Ian's a tappy boy!!! All four fingers pressed together, tapping his fingertips on anything nearby all at once. If he's particularly overwhelmed (good or bad), it turns into patting with his whole hand. He also pops very quietly when he needs to stim. Just gently pressing his lips together and making a soft little popping sound that's easy to miss if it's not silent in the room.

Shaun:

Well, I mean, the obvious one for Shaun is purring. He doesn't have the requisite biology to actually purr, but he'll make a low grumbly sound in the back of his throat while he essentially kneads/makes biscuits on whatever soft thing is nearby. He also clicks his tongue quite loudly whenever things get too quiet or he needs to focus, it's his go-to stim when his brain needs a sound in the background.

Nick:

Nick's necklaces? Stim necklaces. Same with his bracelets. All of his jewellery is in some way stimmy for him. Whether it's just dragging the lock over the chain it's on to feel the way it vibrates or spinning the beads on his bracelet. He's a very fidgety stimmer, so he also keeps at least one fidget toy in his pocket at all times. Just anything that can keep his hands occupied and has a good sensation to it.

Joseph:

Joseph's got the typical delinquent stims. Bouncing his legs and drumming on everything. Whether it's patting a beat on his thighs or using his fingers to drum on the edge of a table, that's his go-to stim. And whenever he needs to sit for long periods of time, his legs are going to end up bouncing. His big nervous stim that he's been trying to kick forever is biting his nails. He'll bite them to the quick.

Jean:

Jean was heavily forced to mask as a child, so he doesn't stim much. But when he's standing and needs to stim, he'll often go en pointe or go through the basic ballet foot positions (or full positions, if he's alone). Generally, he only stims when he's nervous or excited because those are the only times he can't stop himself from unmasking. But yeah, generally ballet feet is his thing because it's easy to hide.

Rory:

Hair twirling! Rory stims by twirling his hair and rubbing the tips of his hair against his thumb. Something about the slightly spiky feeling of it is a great stim for him. He also tends to knock his feet together gently, just bouncing them off each other a bit. He's also really big on auditory stims, so he'll tap or crinkle things to hear the sound they make. When something makes a good sound, he'll keep it!

#swwsdj #something's wrong with sunny day jack #sdj jack #sdj ian #sdj shaun #sdj nick #sdj joseph #sdj jean #sdj rory #sdj headcanons #18+ only #sunshine #fishie #heeheehoohoo threw a few of my own stims in here >:3c

[thecameronchronicles]

Worth A Hard Day's Work

TW: Smut. Language. 

SUMMARY: You surprise Drew when he comes home, but with intentions all your own. 

WORD COUNT: 700

REQUESTED:

Anonymous asked:

Heey can u do a fic where Drew's had a long day at work and he comes home to the reader making dinner for him, and she's wearing only his shirt and panties underneath and she keeps teasing him by bending over the counter while cooking so he finally gives in and fucks her over the counter oops 💞 Also I love everything you write, you're such a good writer &lt;3

Worth A Hard Day’s Work

His favorite casserole almost perfectly crisp beneath the plates of the stove, the nearly quiet ambiance of music playing from Spotify from a speaker across the room, and the sight of you in only his shirt had made his grueling work day with it. Without the presence of the usual quick kiss before you would share the news of your day apart, his eyes would only fixate on you in silent admiration. The very same that kept him in place as you instigated that first kiss. A sweet peck as a hint for what was to come as he pulled you back against him. A deeper kiss locked you in his fingers as you found him already eager to explore what your sensuality was offering. And yet, you wanted to torment him for just a bit longer, even though your own patience was wearing thin. 

The kiss deepened as his fingers came beneath his shirt enough to feel his favorite pair of your lace panties at the mercy of your hips, almost weighed down by how wet he made them with his kiss alone. 

"I have to get the casserole..." You reminded, the domestic role you had taken today, having only added to the eroticism for him as you moved to the oven and his steps followed slowly behind. He timed it to where he would be able to return to your hips as you'd removed your shared dinner, but he would become distracted at the sight of those panties. Worsened by the way you turned to face him as if the innocent smile would contrast the sin in your eyes as you knew exactly what you were doing. 

He waited until the casserole was on the counter before you would be pulled against him. Lifted and fingered in seconds as you gasped. 

"Good thing I didn't know about this all day or I'd have had to come home to make you behave-" 

"You think you can?" You teased as he took your jaw in his hand, a deep kiss leaving you breathless. 

"Maybe not. But I can definitely make you misbehave, can't I, baby?" You nodded as he lowered to his knees and you watched him pull you to the ledge of the counter. 

"Definitely." You spoke the word in a continued tease, nurturing each syllable before he made the contact of his tongue between your folds. 

"You're so wet. Been like this all day?" You nodded. 

"And my good girl waited for me?" 

"Yes..." 

"Then I'm not gonna tease you baby.." You were pulled from the counter and bent over it rather quickly. Bent to where he could apply a proper angle before penetrating effortlessly effortlessly your sobbing sex. 

"Drew!" His hand came around your mouth. 

"I think the neighbors know my name by now, baby...they don't need to know how often..." You forced his hand away. 

"I want them to." You confessed as he took your leg to the counter bending you forward, as you gasped, his force enough to rattle the decor and glasses surrounding you as you both chuckled. But quickly the humor altered into ecstasy as he came to THAT spot in repetition and you clenched around him in perfection. A rush of hands to your breast and slaps to your ass made up the sound between moans and pleas as he pulled you back to his chest so you could look up to him. 

"This what you wanted all day baby?" 

"All day..." You moaned as he set isolated thrusts into you to prolong the moment. 

"And I wanna hear all about it after you can behave yourself long enough to eat." He led his fingers fingers your mouth. 

"Suck baby. Keep yourself quiet so I can hear how fucking sweet it sounds with how well you take me..." You nodded while he alternated his touch to your nipples to your clit, edging you in repetition, before finally taking you with vigor. The unkind force of your hips rushing into the corner was enough to forgive him from the orgasm he had been the cause of ripping through you. 

"If you want me to focus through dinner, you need fo put some pants on, baby..." He explained while sitting at the chair. 

"That seems counterproductive..." You said with a pout. 

"And why's that?" 

"Well...because be covering up your dessert..." You crossed, uncrossed, and recrossed your legs to hint to him as he cocked his jaw. 

"I’ve had a really long day baby…Lots of frustrations I need to get out… Better eat up. You're gonna need your energy..." He leaned closer to you. "All night..."

Taglist: @hopebaker @iovdrew @penny4yourthoughts @magnificantmermaid @pickingviolets @lovedetlost @trikigirl271 @maybankslover @slut4starkey @slvtherinseeker @obxiskewl @obxxrxfes @bluesongbird @slut-era @ailee-celeste @rafesbae @camilynn @bethoconnor

#drew starkey x reader #drew starkey smut #drewstarkey #drew starkey #outerbanks #obx #outer banks

[8turning]

hi ji!

i was thinking a lot about comfort with yungyu the other day; and i know you don't write for him so i was like hm.. you know who would probably have the best comfort as well ever? minho!

so could i request minho comforting a burnt out / stressed reader after he finds her by herself?

no worries if this isn't something you want to write i just wanted to put it out there:) needed to clear my 8turn thoughts HAHA

hi hi omi!! i read this ask before i went into work and literally could not stop thinking about it :(( this fits minho so perfectly!! he's such a safe and comfortable person i cri 💔 thank you for this request!! :D

☆⠀⠀YANG.MINHO — a shoulder to lean on !

bff ! minho x gn ! reader ★ minimal angst. comfort ★ wc 1.9k

warnings: not eating due to stress. eating mentions & food consumption. reader doesn't reply at times. let me know if i missed anything!

n. i wasn't sure if you wanted this to be platonic or romantic BUT!! my first minho fic!! we cheered!! gonna be real i forgot if i proofread this or not. oops

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀〈 REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED ! 〉

despair stung your chest from the inside as you watched your ceiling fan spin - perhaps it could hypnotize you for just a moment, allow you to be unaware of your surroundings and feelings long enough to convince yourself everything will get better.

the breeze it created hit your face, drying out your eyes and causing you to inevitably blink away the few tears that formed as a result.

with the simple action, you're brought back to your reality. you exhale slowly, feeling as though the comforter beneath you could consume you whole - maybe that's what you wanted.

your legs bent at the knee on the edge of your bed, hands intertwined against your stomach as your chest shallowly rises and falls. your eyes follow one fan blade subconsciously, the repetitive movement causing your temples to ache.

your brows furrow, and only then do you pull yourself up from your bed, leaning forward on your palms as you look around your dark room. different items of clothing scattered your floor and desk chair, trash overflown with crumpled papers and drink bottles, and your desk illuminated by your laptop, assignment long forgotten in favor of. . . nothing.

you didn't want to distract yourself from your worries - you simply wanted to do nothing. you wanted nothing.

the fan wasn't to blame for the tears that lined your eyes this time; it was your own emotions. the constant pressure to perform well and provide caused you to neglect how you felt - it all boils over eventually. everyone had a limit, perhaps yours was seeing just how awful you were treating your wellbeing; maybe yours was how you saw it all but had no desire to fix it.

you heard a knock sound through your apartment, but you couldn't move; your body wanted to stay still. your breathing remained steady as another knock struck against your door. your phone chimes, it chimes again, then it rings.

you heard it all. you couldn't answer any of them.

another knock. then another chime.

"y/n!"

then a shout from a familiar voice - then a pause.

"i'm gonna break down the door! then i'll have to pay for property damage! so please, just- just let me in!"

the fear of a noise complaint caused your breath to quicken, aching muscles push you up from your spot, heavy footsteps sound through your hallway as if you forgot how it felt to walk any distance further than your desk to your bed.

you swallow thickly before slowly bringing shaky hands to your door lock, the click sounding much louder in your otherwise silent apartment. opening the door, you see minho's worried face, two plastic bags in his hands as a smile grows on his lips.

"hey," he says, glasses perched atop his nose and sounding out of breath from all of his shouting. all you can bring yourself to do is break eye contact with him, looking down just past his shins to the carpeted apartment corridor. "is it okay if i come in?"

his voice is gentle, picking up on the signs of you feeling emotionally unwell. minho's head tilts at his inquiry - you can see such from your peripheral vision. you pause for a moment, and minho waits patiently despite the ache his arms feel from the bags he carried. he watches as you take a step back, allowing him inside.

minho steps in, removing his shoes before walking over to your kitchen and setting the bags down. your counter is lined with dishes and take-out containers - the disarray of your home is obvious, but minho never comments on it.

"have you eaten yet?" he questions, setting down the bags in the only vacant place he could on your counter - the sound of dishes clinking accompanying his voice.

you don't answer, slowly making your way to sit at your dining table.

"i brought some stuff," he continues. part of you felt relief he wasn't probing you to reply to him - you let out a soft sigh. "is ramen okay with you?" minho questions, two containers in his hands as he looks in your direction.

he saw how your eyes were clouded over as you stared down at the floor. through he was worried, he knew you'd open up once you were ready. and so, minho decides to take the quicker route, filling both containers with water before putting them into the microwave.

the dull hum filled the air, and a pang of guilt washed over you as your eyes flick over to minho's form, his hands carrying your dishes into the sink and tossing trash into the bin.

this wasn't for him to clean, but he did so with no complaints.

your eyes felt heavy, shoulders slumped over as you took little care in keeping your posture straight. the sound of your faucet running could be heard, a paper towel being torn and the sound of disinfectant being sprayed followed it. the artificial smell of lemon did not pair well with the ramen broth that was being cooked, but you didn't say a word.

minho was quick to switch out the cooked ramen for the other, allowing the completed one to sit on the counter for a few minutes too cool off.

he continued to clean up your space, sink filling with bubbles as he soaks your used dishes, tossing the used towel into the bin before straightening out what was on your countertop, turning off your faucet in the process.

the microwave beeps for the second time; your eyes close and nose scrunch at the piercing noise. he removes the second container, copying the same routine he had before.

you can see how he approaches you, placing the first container in front of you along with utensils before grabbing his own, sitting across from you.

you stare blankly at the lid, the translucent plastic now fogged over from steam as minho pulls out his phone, scrolling as he waits for his own meal to decrease in temperature.

your hands fidget under the table, disconnecting from one another to carefully remove the lid of the ramen. your met with a wonderful aroma, and although you didn't show such in your expression, you were pleased with this choice of a meal.

minho's eyes raise from his phone as he watches you cautiously grab for your utensils - his heart aches seeing how shaky you were, your energy alarmingly low.

he watches you for a moment - watches as you bring some ramen to your lips and take a small bite. you chew slowly then swallow, and minho feels a weight being lifted from his shoulders when you go in for another bite.

shutting off his phone, he slides it back into his pocket slowly, not wanting to startle you from any sudden movements. you hear as he begins to eat himself, a pleased sigh leaving his nose at the first bite.

"i'm a good cook, aren't i?" he jokes with his mouth half full, watching as the smallest of smiles appears on your face, falling soon after. but to minho, that was a win.

you both continue in silence, minho trying to match your pace in eating as best he could so he could keep watch of you longer. although his efforts, he finished before you, tossing his ramen container into the trash before standing at your sink.

your faucet turns on once more, minho rolling up his sleeves to his elbows before reaching into the water bath he created prior. he was careful in washing your dishes, and with newfound energy, your eyes flicked over to where he stood.

your gaze remained on the back of his head, the purple in his hair a bit more faded than the last time you saw him. he groans as water slashes on his shirt, a soft laugh escaping your nose, and it was then when you understood that you didn't need hypnosis to realize things will get better.

you were worthy of being cared for, both by others and by yourself. you shouldn't have to live dreadfully just because that's what you think you deserve. you felt guilty for assuming minho cared so little for you when he's only ever shown you love and gratitude.

your chest ached, no longer from muscle pain but from grief - eyes watering, breathing becoming increasingly unsteady as you plant your palm against the table, pushing yourself up from your seat and approaching your friend.

your arms cautiously wrap around his torso loosely - the sound of water running making your footsteps unintelligible to him. your temple rests between his shoulder blades, and you can feel as his head turns to try and see you from his position.

minho turns around in your grasp, hands soaked in water and lingering bubbles as he raises them away from you. his heartbeat is heavy against your ears, quick and uneven as he processes your shift in emotion. tears soaked his shirt and minho tuned out the sound of water running behind him.

"y/n- are you-" he was at a loss of words, eyes wandering around your apartment before reaching the top of your head once more. "can i hug you?"

he was unsure if that's what you wanted, especially when his hands were covered in water, but when he hears you mumble a simple, "yes, please," - the first time you had spoken to him tonight - it was more than enough.

you feel the cold water against your back as he wraps his arms around you, but you didn't care. your fingers bunch minho's shirt into your fists, holding onto him tightly - he could feel how uneven your breathing was.

"i got you," he says, leaning his back against the countertop, allowing you to rest against him. "i got you. . ."

your eyes close, tears drying against your cheeks as you take a deep breath. minho's fingers draw circles against your back - you hear as he begins to hum, the vibration buzzing against your temple.

you had half-the-brain to decipher the melody, instead choosing to let it calm your thoughts - this remedy proved to work well.

after a few beats of silence, you find the strength to speak again. "th-thank you for be-ing here," you whisper, voice broken as it was the first time you had spoken in days.

"of course i'd be here," minho replies, his volume matching yours as he reaches an arm around him to turn off the faucet. "go rest, okay? i'll take care of everything here," he continues, pushing himself off of the counter but keeping you closely pressed to his chest.

the walk to your room was almost impossible, walking backwards and not being able to see definitely made the commute much more interesting. minho made no comments about the state of your room, sitting you on your bed and making sure you tucked yourself away under the covers before he left to continue his work in the kitchen.

there was a small feeling of shame in having someone else clean your space for you - its a very vulnerable position, but minho allowed you to show your vulnerabilities without judgement. although you never wished to get to a point where he needed to take care of you, you knew he would do it again all in a heartbeat.

minho would take care of you as many times as you needed to be, because no matter what you're dealing with, you deserve to feel loved.

© 8turning 2023.

#8turn fluff #8turn fanfic #8turn writing #8turn x reader #minho fluff #minho fanfic #minho writing #minho x reader #yang minho fanfic #yang minho fluff #yang minho x reader #kpop fluff #kpop fanfic #.mine #.minho

[milkteamoon]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @shinyopals thank youuuu

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 42!

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 340,042

3. What fandoms do you write for? Currently and primarily The Magnus Archives — I only rarely write for multiple fandoms at a time. In the past I've written for Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun, Deltarune, Victoria's Electric Coffin......a friend and I used to write OC/Black Butler crossover fics in like, middle school lol

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Cicada Summar (JSHK, rated T, gen) — Pre-canon JSHK backstory fic

No Sort of Name for People Like Us (TMA, rated T, jmart) — mid s3 practice kissing fic

Our Own Personal Hell (TMA, rated T, jmart) — s2 time loop shenanigans

Tongue to Teeth (TMA, rated T, jmart) — victorian monster hunting au

Check Each Box That Applies (TMA, rated T, jmart) — s2 lunch dates and personal discussions

Cicada Summer was posted at the height of JSHK fandom popularity, so I don't think that one is super representative of my "best" fics, though I do think that No Sort of Name is pretty good haha

5. Do you respond to comments? I do my best to!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Prooobably Hazy Days of December...I got a lot of people yelling at me for that one haha (even if I don't think it's too bad? It's open ended at least)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Umm I'm not sure! I think most of my fics are happy endings...maybe Worth More Than All the Silence

8. Do you get hate on fics? I've gotten a few weird comments but I don't think I've ever gotten anything outright hateful

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I've written a few fics but must of my smut stays in the Google docs. My asexual ass likes things more focused on the humorous lead up and/or kink than the actual sex part haha

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I think the closest thing I've written to a crossover is the doctor who au I wrote earlier this year — I don't really write proper crossovers :,)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Don't think so!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Me and @indigosienna attempted to write a collab fic back in 2020, but we both ended up falling off of it before we finished (oops). The first chapter is still good though I think!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? HARD question, but jmart and hananene both have very special places in my heart

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Too many fic ideas to list haha

16. What are your writing strengths? I think I'm pretty good at humor and getting into a character's head. Also love writing an emotionally charged scene

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Dialogue heavy scenes are the WORST (writing dialogue tags without sounding stupidly repetitive...shaking my fist at the sun). Also forever complaining about editing

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I don't know any other languages well enough to do so

19. First fandom you wrote for? I have vague memories of writing warrior cats fanfiction waaaaay back in the day

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? This is a haaaaard question but currently I'd have to say 1. Learning the Ropes — I originally started this for the RQ big bang in June and didn't make it to the deadline, so it felt like a big accomplishment to actually finish it. Plus I just really like delving into that era of canon and Jon and Martin's whole not-quite-dating shtick they have going on. And 2. Tongue to Teeth — I really love this fic and this au and I was noooot at all expecting the love for it I ended up getting on it. I love this silly au and I'm glad others do as well :,)

Not sure who has been tagged so! Sorry for any repeats! @rakel-on-ao3 @asleeb @thatsrightdollface @crit20lesbian @phynoma @lo-fi-charming @pinehutch @cnnmonbimee

#tag game #thank youuu for the tag opal. these are always fun to do :)