#slow construction of destiel canon

[verobatto]

"Break the jar, and do it again." The slow construction of Canon Destiel

Ok people the hiatus is gone and the new chapter aired so we have now time for interesting thoughts…

This is another Destiel meta, sorry again if anyone already talked about this ideas, you can share your opinions here!

We want Destiel become canon. That's law. But how you get together two characters with such defectives inner issues? Like Cas and Dean? Are they ready to be together? I know we are just NEAR to... But we need just a little big step for that...

Before we start to break things here... I want to discuss about one of the most important tool used by Supernatural writers... And bc I like symbolic titles... I'm gonna title it like this...

Supernatural and the Phoenix Complex

Spn must be the most mortal series, and we have memes of our beloved characters's taste for dying over and over again throughout the entire series and reliving in the same season or in the next.

Like the Phoenix, they reborn from their ashes renewed. And that's the meaning from this.: "I'm giving you this so many chances to change your point of view, so you can see with new eyes."

Is the same concept with the breaking point trough lost, pain and tragedy.

Moving this idea to the slow construction of Canon Destiel, we had witnessed how they broke Cas and Dean over and over again, just to develop their characters into a renewed and healthy ones, only in this way, they'd be able to love each other in a plenty way.

So .. let's keep the concept about "breaking the defective jar, to make the jar again." A new one, a better one...

We need new Cas and new Dean, loving themselves, growing in self acceptance and learning about communication.

Ok .. now we're ready for the jam here...

... Let's brake some jars ...

1) Breaking Castiel

Well... We have this millennial Supernatural been with a very hard to break settings. A program that every angel have: Obedience, castity, submission and complete the mission. How do you break a program like that? We need a really good hacker... Maybe one with green eyes? 😹

Godstiel.

Godstiel was the result from a desperate decisions coming from Cas to protect Dean from another Apocalypse. Cas couldn't manage the immensely of having thousands of souls and the hug power corrupted him.

But this traumatic experience didn't help Cas to improve. This experience gave us a depressing Castiel for the following two seasons. So this... Just depressed him deeply.

Human!Cas

Human!Cas was the breaking point for the character. This was the improvement he needed. Being human guide him to a brand new Cas. Changing his perspective about humanity and make him fell more in love with it 😉 if you know what I mean. This was the remarkable, tragic, but blessed situation that brought him to the bottom of himself. Yes. He was broken but still learning and growing. This was good for the character.

Empty!Cas and AUCastiel

Empty!Cas was another very important impulse for the character, at the beginning of the s13, where Cas talking with the Empty, was like "looking himself in the mirror" but not really, was more the meaning of it. Cas faces himself, his fears and feelings, he embraced all of that, and knowing he already was saved, he came back with his family. Closing this meaning by the end of the same season when he faces now AUCastiel, another "looking himself in the mirror" and he embraces his family, the Winchesters. Knowing AUCastiel helped Cas to reconciling with himself. And the meaning of killing that part of him, big development of the character. Cas killed all that lack of emotion, lack of fee will. Now he knows he don't regret chose Dean, humanity, and fell for it. That was huge for him, and prepared us to close his character issues. Now that he can love himself, he could freely love Dean.

But... We still have that miscommunication factor that is the last step. Aaaand the little, tiny big detail that he already confessed his love to Dean and he felt rejected? Well yes... That's bad...

Mourning!Cas

Mourning!Cas, the actual arc, came to sell the character giving him the last lesson trough pain and loose. How this Cas, whom tasted corruption, depression, redemption, humanity, reacts now facing AUMichael!Dean. Facing lost. Facing this "bond in pause" as I mentioned in my other meta, as Dean faced it in s13 with Castiel's death. Well I'm not very sure about if he is into a soldier mode? Or depressing mode? I'm gonna choose the second one... When he talks with Jack and said WE ARE GONNS FIGHT AND GET DEAN BACK AND KILL AU MICHAEL and etc, etc... He is talking with himself, and he is almost in tears... Emotional... He looks more human in his facial expressions. So yes .. Cas is being very human... He miss Dean... The bond is in pause.... Sigh... I hope he become more determined and aggressive to get Dean back... Let's wait and see... But this episode 1 Cas sounded me like... "I just wait here, then" please come back Dean. 🤷 I'm clueless...

2) Breaking Dean

Dean had always the height from being the first born, the obedient son, carrying on his shoulders with the oppressive idea of a toxic masculinity, the responsibility for being the older brother, toxic codependency and last, but not less important, fighting against his repressed feelings and desires. This whole defective jar needs a lot of breaking.

His years in Hell

Well, we have a very heavy past here, Dean have been trough so many traumatic experiences, he had suffer the lost from his father and Sam. The pressure of being responsible of his father death and not being able to save his brother, consumed him I'm despair, and that led him to make that deal with the cross road demon.

Once in hell he breaks... And when he come back, he just talked about it once with Sam. And that's it. Bc Dean .. and here is the big growing up impediment of the character... He's the Master of Disguise.

(And we have symbolism here again, bc Dean loves disguise, we had seen him in many chapters playing with it... He use disguise as an scape for fun... And for self protection. We could said he disguise his body and his feelings... And that's it)

So he pushes all those feelings again deep down his soul. This feelings and trauma doesn't' exist if I don't look at them. I'll be just fine!

So Hell was a traumatic experience, but it didn't improve the character for good. He remains as constipated emotionally as when he started. So... Not good.

Purgatory

I had already talked about how Dean facing his pure and true feelings in this place. This traumatic experience was positive for the character, bc how I said before, in Purgatory Dean realizes that he is in love with Cas when in his soul remains just what was pure in him (without others humans necessities). Maybe he wouldn't use the 'L' word here, he used the "Need" word as a love confession, then he felt rejected by Cas and decided locking his feelings again, but yes... Now he knows.

Yes... Season 8 was good... 😏

The mark of Cain and Demon!Dean

This was very traumatic for Dean and for us! Dean become a monster. Literally. He hit bottom here... A very good breaking point! But again... He continued doing the same "put down the feelings, and everything will be just fine".

The only good thing here was this inner realization...

This is what Dean learns going through that traumatic experience.

Cas showed him that he knew him very well, and even so, he accepted him. That was scary for Dean. That's a feeling he wasn't used to manage.

Something is growing up slowly in his mind, the idea of sharing his life with someone else...

Gif from @veryamooseing blog

I like that seed that was planted and become to release a little bud...

And this idea is settled when Dean felt he was about to change and die. He was a monster that was about to kill his own brother. When he become in what he hated and hunted all his life, he breaks again and in that huge situation, he become to reorder his priorities. Love, family, retirement? Settled down with a hunter? Building Dean' cave and watch movies with Cas?

Mourning!Dean

Dabb's era brought us a recurring fact: Dean goes crazy when Cas isn't in the bunker or don't answer the phone.

We thought wen Cas come back Dean would be able to recognize his feelings for him and maybe... Tell him??? Or change a little about it? But no. What we get after all this mourning was again, the pushing down emotions and more fear. Yes... A disaster! Dean keeps locked into this emotional prison and he can't get out himself for it. He doesn't advance. He is stuck. And now that he's afraid of loosing people he loves (Castiel) and now that he realizes he's in love with Cas... Well more and more fear... Sigh...

Michael!Dean

Well this is so interesting plot and opportunity for Dean's character development. We have AUMichael talking with two people about LOVE, PEACE, PURITY AND SAVE THE WORLD. If this isn not a mirror for Empty!Cas then idk what it is... And yes .. this is AUMichael talking indirectly to Dean...

"You think you want peace? But you bring war all the time with your actions... You think you want Love? But you lock it down and ignore it. You think you have purity in your heart? But you are just lies. You think you save the world? But you can't even save you from your own hate for yourself.

Yes, this is a huge opportunity for Dean to begin once for all to grow up in self acceptance and in love for himself, facing as it was in Purgatory, the purity that remains in his heart and soul. He can reach peace enjoying retirement with Cas and Sam. He can love Cas romantically and he can love his family in a healthy way.

This is the new Dean we are expecting to find through S14. This is the kind of breaking point, phoenix complex, new and improved jar, we were waiting for Dean. Let's see what happens.

So slow, slow, slowly but with sure steps we hope the construction of Destiel Canon wait for us at the end of this journey.

Sorry... This is so large!! Did you really read this mess? I really sorry... But if you did, please feel free to discuss.

I'm tagging for debate...

@magnificent-winged-beast @sactownbrowns3 @lovemesomecas94 @naruhearts @thedogsled @dimples-of-discontent @lykanyouko @mrsaquaman187 @evvvissticante @agusvedder @navajolovesdestiel @destielhoneybee @castiellover20

And everyone who want to discuss!

#my meta #break point #repetitive death #phoenix complex #characters's development #destiel canon #canon destiel #destiel meta #castiel #dean winchester #dabb's circular narrative #dabb's era #mirrors #emotional prison #slow construction of destiel canon

[elizabethrobertajones]

was forced to see this by tumblr:

and while obviously there’s no point talking about the minutiae of the argument because, well, we were there in season 9 & 10, we had this on lock, obviously you only come to this opinion by just not reading Destiel blogs with an eye to caring about the ship... 

I wanna propose a new theory: the show wanted to do a whole Cain and Abel thing with Sam and Dean to emphasise the dramatic tension of maybe Dean murders Sam or not or whatever, and have the threat loom over the whole arc because, well, brother murder drama. See also: Chuck’s obsession. 

But then the actual writing and execution of putting Sam and Dean in a Cain and Abel situation was just so poorly constructed and written with an utter lack of tension about if Dean would kill Sam one day when it needed like, the glimpses Sam got of other drafts where Dean kept murdering him like we saw in season 15, or other things to spend a LOT of time harping on it. Just like, rando people in their circle finding out Dean had the mark of Cain and looking at Sam like, are you not a little bit worried about that? ... I really wanted this dramatic tension and I spent as much time as I could trying to wring it out of my meta watch of those seasons, and it’s not even coherent. Sam occasionally just googles “Mark of Cain” every 10 episodes to see if the lore’s changed and just spends his whole time wandering cheerfully around with Dean working MotW with him and Dean only actually tries to kill him once in anger when he’s a demon and then Sam’s right back to hanging out with him pretending nothing happened...

Like the whole catastrophically bad collection of character traits and writing choices and general format issues not allowing them to explore this... No wonder people who would have really cared about a high tension relationship with constant “do I want to hug you or do I want to murder you” chemistry in every scene just end up fishing around for the next best relationship to compare it to when the mythologising brother narrative, the whole like, basis of the show being supposed to be an elevation of Brother Drama to high art...

As this rando anon said, the Colette thing isn’t even a big part of the story, either with Cain in terms of screen time, or in terms of the Destiel pay off (regardless of the year and a half of subtextual build up that would be finally realised in 10x22) in terms of like, it being one scene of the show where you can clearly just point to it and say “there it is” 

(also lol the anon acknowledging that the show did have a scene doing this at all, having to accept the moment was a canonically written Destiel scene at all to snipe at it in this way)

but like... The catastrophically bad attempt to make Dean remotely threatening to Sam either existentially or moment to moment, with a ready-made parallel with cultural depth and a foundation stone of bible stuff I guess? Something that could have had so much material and they could have been really celebrating that they were cain and abel to each other if the show made it MEAN anything and bigged up the bro love between those two and thus the drama of it being applied to Sam n Dean.... All just completely ignored to try and jealously get in on the love side plot because maybe idk the destiel shippers wrote better meta to draw out the nuances and turned it into a fully realised story and got the benefit of watching with that constant tension and drama and every moment between Dean n Cas in that time being like “OMG HE’S YOUR COLETTE” and how anything could make us flip out with delight over the comparisons... We did genuinely have a better, more consistent dynamic to work with and great fun doing it. 

I mean is this fixation on being annoyed at hellers and our Colette nonsense just because they’re jealous the show fucked up the easiest slow ball they could have thrown at the story so badly and meanwhile the raw power of Destiel subtext in that era was this irresistable forbidden siren song that they could only futilely try and put onto Sam even though the parallel itself DEMANDS a brother to brother comparison?

#clown college colette #(them) #the colette conundrum #(us)

[incarnateirony]

Thing is, I once enjoyed your meta, was part of the "positivety police". But when you started attacking ppl who want more to see DeanCas as canon, I didn't understand your aggressivety. Nowadays, I only see the likes of you and Casgirlsam defending win*est, reblogging win*est, arguing how stupid Destiel shippers don't appreciate Win*est, even though it was the most famous ship or sth. Saying how everyone against it is just purity police. That's why no one takes you serious anymore. And it's sad

Oh look more bullshit. *looks high and low for anywhere i defend wincest*

*encourages my blog followers to look high and low for anywhere i defend wincest*

Oh you mean that time i told people to stop dogpiling a nonaggressive person in fandom minding her own fucking business while saying i dont like the ship but she doesn't deserve you being a bunch of thundercunts? That person who doesn't hang out with the aggressive shippers that attack people? Who literally was so respectful she didnt just tag everything but made a side account for her squick ship so others didn't have to see it, and mysteriously you go out of your way to look at while claiming to hate and be triggered by it?

You seem to be confusing "thinking you have no right to relentlessly assault someone in their own space" with "defending a ship i have been extremely vocal against", and, in irony, you even can't control yourself while I'm flagging your IP and interactions enough to approach your ISP for service termination on its harassment clause.

By the way-- "positivity police" ends at me not accepting abusive cankers like YOU coming into MY space or speaking up when you get SO OUT OF HAND you negatively impact someone's mental state, which you show zero empathy for right now.

As if anyone from yeshims ring, who use that phrase, were ever friends of mine anyway.

The world is literally burning, people are dying by the hundreds of thousands, protests are worldwide, and you're online trying to manufacture drama. Given you at least stopped libeling the lgbt author with shit you made up here at least. Now try that for the other made up garbage. Find something constructive to do.

This is the last ask I'll actually respond to from you, statcounter quantifies engagements you send even if I don't reply and I'm not gonna clutter my blog with negativity you are DESPERATELY seeking platform with. I'm sure you'll cry POSITIVITY POLICE WAHHHHH for me not giving you that platform and taking up space on my blog that NEWS FLASH, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO ANYWAY. People don't come to my blog to read made up drama bullshit. Traffic slow on yours, it seems. If you weren't insufferable maybe you'd have enough platform to make up shit and get the attention you're after on your own blog. Try it some time.

My blog is not a ship war blog. Get it through your thick head or I'll have your ISP get it through your head for you.

If you think not having free right to someone else's space for abuse is "positivity police" you have some deeper problems going on and definitely aren't welcome at my blog till you clean that shit up. My tolerance for abusive personalities are negative-nothing.

And no son. Someone defending their own space and voice firmly isn't abuse. That's the narrative an abuser tries to spin, so lemme head you off there. I can and will drag you folks that wanna be big and bad @ me. You're used to getting away with it on other blogs with other personalities. I have been trialed by real life events that make these pitiful attempts laughable. Deal with it.

Get over yourselves. You're an anon nobody. I'm not gonna get on the lgbt history deletion train because some anon coward wants to spam my inbox. I will not go down on that wrong side of history. I am not part of your ship war hype you are mapping out in anon all the ways you are addicted to the war, not the content. To the attention, not the value. That aint this blog.

This behavior even looks ridiculous to most people in highschool. And i don't know about you, but i graduated high school a LONG fucking time ago. Actually more than an entire K-12 over again ago. This is not a blog for children; not because i post explicit content, which I don't, but because it's centered on discourse of politics, theology, history and yes, bodies of text. Not bored kids who can't figure out how to be constructive and spend their entire day fabricating nonsense to flatter themselves with digital pissing matches. I spend my days phone banking and fundraising for dozens of progressive organizations to liberate people but please, go off that your random nonsense that you literally make up is somehow woke.

That's not to say people under 18 aren't allowed at all. Again, i have no explicit content. Some people under 18 are mature. That is not what I'm calling children. I'm calling people that act like children, children. And i don't care if they're 22 when they do it.

[torturedpoetemotions]

I don't wanna rain on anybody's parade, so if you don't want some bitter Destiel fan tea just keep scrolling.

.

.

.

I'm just...so tired. Tired of us Destiel fans telling each other not to panic. I get it. I do. But we need to brace ourselves for the "final confirmation" that this was never the slow-burn we were hoping for.

It's been over 10 years. A solid decade of queerbaiting, inconsistent development, and long stretches with no scenes. And that whole time, Destiel fans have been writing our brilliant, carefully thought-out metas on why this is the season they'll finally make it canon, because "that's how the narrative has been constructed!"

As if the SPN writers would ever let a little thing like a well-constructed narrative stand in the way of being shitty to fans of shipping (or queer folks longing for representation on their favorite show).

Here is what I do know: SPN has been full of homophobia and toxic masculinity since day one.

Over and over, the writers and showrunners prove to us in so many ways that they're justnot invested in this part of the story.

On this show, representation of any kind--including queer characters and relationships--eventually, inevitably becomes cannon fodder to feed the Straight White Boy Angst Machine.

Every time one writer throws us a bone, another writer pops up to undermine it.

And finally: one of the two actors embodying these characters vocally loathes Destiel.

To him, all that gay stuff is only good for making jokes in the gag reel. The minute we try to take it seriously or ask to see more of it or want to talk about the implications of it, he tells us it's not real...like anything scripted and acted out for a camera is.

Worse, he has an unprecedented level of clout with the writers and showrunners. Scenes change when he wants them changed, and those scenes are often the ones that would provide stronger canonical support for Destiel if left alone.

So no, given those factors I actually don't expect more than a clench-jawed nod of understanding and some eye contact by way of resolution to this latest fight. Maybe a man-tear or a heartfelt speech from Cas that Dean barely reacts to...if we're lucky and it's Berens writing the episode.

I really hope I'm wrong. But I'm not getting my hopes up just to be disappointed one more time.

#supernatural #spn beginning to end #spn spoilers #destiel #queerbaiting #the rupture #ship wank

[helakkas]

Rules: Always post the rules, answer the questions given to you, then write 10 questions of your own, and tag 10 other people.

I was tagged first by @procasdeanating and then by @flyingcatstiel, so I’ll be an overachiever and answer both! Sheesh, the size of this thing. :D Sorry this took so long!

1. If you could start a one week vacation tomorrow, where would you go?

Italy! I’ve never been there, and the weather there is so much better than here right now. Also, I’ve always wanted to visit just to eat the food. (Priorities!)

2. What skill do you have that would come handy in an apocalyptic world?

Uhh. Probably would depend on the type of apocalypse? If there are zombies, I have a shotgun and I know how to use it. But I’m afraid I wouldn’t survive out in the wild for a week, if the food ran out.

3. Favorite episode last season?

I...I didn’t watch the season entirely, so I’m not going to say anything. ^^;

4. Can you play an instrument or do you plan to learn?

Yup! I’ve played piano since I was five years old. I haven’t practiced properly in years, though, so I’m not as good as I used to be. I’ve also taken singing lessons for a year, and I’m not good, but I’m learning.

5. Raspberries or strawberries?

Both. But if pressed, I’d say strawberries.

6. Who do you want to see brought back in the Alternative Universe next season?

Charlie! She’s my favorite, and I refuse to accept the thing they did to her.

7. First movie you saw at a cinema?

Aladdin. WIthout giving away which aging crisis I’m currently going through, I was fairly young.

8. Favorite version of Cas?

I’m gonna go with the classic, season 4 Cas. I love his story arc from seasons 4 to 5, and how he goes from being an asshole with orders to questioning, how he’s unsure, how he clearly grows to care and how he battles with his emotions. (Unpopular opinion? I don’t care for endverse Cas, and never have. I don’t think it fits him at all.)

9. If you could choose a song as a music cue next season, what would it be and for which scene would you use it?

Aaaah! I...I don’t know. Uhhh. I guess Gimme Shelter has always had kind of a SPN-esque feel to it, but...I don’t know where it would fit. (Oh, hey, it apparently was used in season 11! Thanks, google.) Um. I’m probably defaulting to fandom’s favorites here, but I’ve always listened to Florence + the Machine’s Breath of Life and No Light, No Light as Castiel’s unofficial themes. Maybe those could be used in his re-introduction?

10. This weekend is VanCon. What question would you ask the cast if you were there?

Jeez, this is why I don’t go to cons. I wouldn’t be able to ask them anything. Honestly, I don’t even understand how people come up with questions for them anymore - everything has been asked twice, save for new developments in the series. Uhh. If I got a serious answer out of him, I’d ask especially Misha his thoughts about the series and what he really thinks about the storylines Castiel has been through.

Thanks for tagging me, @procasdeanating!

Onto @flyingcatstiel‘s questions! And thank you so much for mentioning my fics - it always makes my day whenever someone recs my silly stuff! <3

1. How many languages do you speak? List them, even if still learning or already forgetting.

My mother tongue is Finnish, but besides that, I know English (obviously), Swedish, German, Japanese and very little Korean. Sadly, my German and my Japanese aren’t very good, since I haven’t spoken them in such a long time that I’ve forgotten a lot. I’ve also (slowly, on my own) started learning Italian, but that’s basically at the “hello my name is” stage at this point.

2. Favorite Dean/Cas moment on the show?

Oh noooo. I love the little, quiet moments between them, like in season 8 when Cas is sitting on the bed and going through Dean’s bag and they’re just talking, or little touches between them. Or god, the unguarded happiness radiating from Dean when he finally is reunited with Cas in Purgatory and the hug...! But I’m gonna go with the classic and say Castiel’s introduction - the way he strolls into the barn and Dean puts a knife in his chest. I love how far they’ve come from the first impressions! :D

3. Favorite fanfic tropes in destiel fics?

Fake dating fake dating fake dating!!! I live for fake dating fics in any fandom. I also love mutual pining and slow burn. More specifically for SPN tropes, I love it when Cas is an angel/creature and Dean is human, wheather it’s in canon or AU setting.

4. Fruit or vegetable you don’t like (mango is not an acceptable answer, pick another one)

I’m good with most, but I can’t stand pineapple. (Mangos are delicious, as a sidenote. :D)

5. Tell me about a destiel fic you’ve read recently and really enjoyed. [please include title, author and link]

I really loved superhoney’s Rescue Me Tonight. Victorian setting and pining, what more could you ask for? Just wonderful. And Ahaviel’s Hunt for a Healing Halo was lovely, and amazingly meta - also, I kinda love fics where the author shows they have specific knowledge about something.

6. Which one of your own (recent) fan works (fic, art, gif set, vid, side blog, etc) you are proud of? If you don’t have any, give a shout out to a (recent) fan work that you really loved. [any fandom, please include title, creator and link]

I don’t have anything recent... I haven’t finished anything in such a long time that I’m ashamed. I hate it. :/ But I’m kind of proud of an unfinished fic that I will definitely finish for Christmas, if only because of the idea. Um. But I really liked Ties That Bind by squirrel_loves_wings - magic and fantasy, and I love the world and its possibilities! Also, I’m mentioning another fic by superhoney, The Watcher and The Warrior. It’s been a long, long time since I’ve seen a fantasy world constructed so carefully, so fully in fic.

7. Recommend me a new TV show to take my mind of SPN. Tell me why it will help.

I will always recommend Brooklyn Nine-Nine, but you already watch that, so... Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries. It’s a light-hearted crime show with a lady detective in the lead, taking place in Australia...in 1920s! It’s got a lot of fabulous dresses, wonderful female characters, well written stories, and lovely relationships between lead characters. I love it.

8. Are you going to watch season 13 of Supernatural? If not, when did you stop watching the show? (I’d love to know why but you don’t have to justify your decision)

Maybe. I, um, I feel called out, but I have to admit I stopped watching in season 9. I do own all the seasons on DVD, but I still haven’t watched the newer seasons, except for some episodes. I think I’m pretty caught up on the series thanks to tumblr, though. I stopped watching when it made me too anxious, and I didn’t want to witness my favorites dying (Kevin, Charlie, and I’m sure I’d love Eileen and Billie and whoever else). Plus all the other problems with the series kept piling up, not to mention how they didn’t seem to know how to write Cas...I’ve stayed in the fandom for the characters and the wonderful content fandom keeps making, and that’s fine with me.

9. Cats or dogs?

Dogs! I like cats, too, but I’m so allergic to them that I’ve never been able to spend much time with them.

10. What is your happy ending for Cas on the show?

*grumbles* What are the chances that Cas even gets a happy ending in this show... Um, I’d want to see him stay with Dean and Sam (if we’re being unrealistic, share a home with Dean and be in an unambigious, romantic relationship with Dean, but this is SPN, so that’s never going to happen). I’ve always liked the idea of Cas ending up as a hybrid, angel with a soul, so that he’s basically cut off from Heaven and somewhat human, but still retains some of his angelic qualities. Best of both worlds, kind of? Basically, I just want him to be happy. ;_;

Thanks for tagging me, @flyingcatstiel! 

My questions:

1. Autumn or spring? 2. What is your introductory fic to SPN fandom, or which fic drew you in? 3. How many countries have you visited? 4. What is your favorite book and/or writer? 5. What’s the latest movie you’ve seen in theaters? 6. Cinematically, what is your favorite SPN episode? Not because of the plot or the lack thereof, but because of the shots and angles? 7. What movie/book/TV show world would you like to visit, or even live in? 8. What’s the last CD you bought? 9. What are your favorite tropes in fanfic? 10. Comments versus kudos - which do you prefer, both leaving and getting for a fic?

Tagging @nihonlove @apermanentsituation @i-am-mad-as-a-box-of-frogs @beanmom @the-suit-lady @everythingsinred @spellboundcastiel @awed-frog @zerostumbleine33 @reallyelegantsharkfish No pressure to answer this, though!

#long post #this is so long i apologize #ask meme #you can't believe how long filling this out took #tumblr doesn't work on my laptop well anymore because my laptop is ancient #but i finally did it

[like-a-bucky]

Fanfiction tag

I was tagged a while ago by my sister @niniel-kirkland to answer these few questions, let’s go!

Why/How did you get in fanfiction?

I found my first fanfictions by complete chance, wandering through forums and blogs, until I ended up on fanfiction.net. I kept reading and reading because it was absolutely wonderful to see my favourite characters keep evolving and existing beyond the limits of the original work.

Why did you get into writing?

I can’t exactly remember, it was a need, an itch I needed to scratch. I still do, I just have so many thoughts and ideas in my head that I need to let them out somehow. Also, so many fanfictions made me dream/cry/sob/laugh I just feel like it would be nice to offer the same emotions to a fellow fan.

How long have you been writing?

Around nine years, I think?

Do you think you’re a good writer?

I only base myself on my readers’ comments to say that apparently, I am. I think that a good writer is an author who manages to bring their readers on a journey, to convey the emotions of their characters and, for a little while, to make the readers’ and characters’ hearts beat together. From the comments and feedback I’ve received from my readers, I have apparently managed to do that, which is amazing.

Do you think you’ve improved?

Oh yes. Rereading my old (non-published, apparently I have some survival instinct) fanfictions makes me cringe, haha. Too cliché, too basic, not plotty enough... I also improve from story to story, especially when I start writing in a new fandom: I feel like my two or three first stories (mostly oneshots) are only first tries where I get around the characters’ personality and features, I need to explore them a little in simple stories before I can take them on a bigger journey.

Name one thing that helps you write.

Music is pretty helpful, I like to have the right atmosphere to what I’m writing.

Have you ever gotten hate related to fic?

No, thankfully. Authors write what they write for themselves and for the people who like the same tags/AU/kinks/whatever. If you hate a story, don’t hate the author. If you really can’t hold your tongue, try to explain calmly what you didn’t like, with better arguments than I don’t like it because it sucks. I’m all for pointing out real problems (really bad and impending grammar, disrespectful words/ways of describing characters and so on) but some people hate on writers just because they wrote A/B/O and they, as readers, didn’t like it. Dude. Don’t do that, just don’t read the fic.

Fanfictions or books?

Both. Some books suck, some fanfictions are amazing and vice-versa. It’s not because you hold a published book in your hands that it’s better than fanfiction (and it’s not because a fanfic has been published that it’s a good fanfiction.) Fanfictions tend to include a wider-range of characters/sexuality/gender than books do, which is important, and books are sometimes limited with that but write it better. So really, I read both, depending on the topic and the mood.

Do you want to professionally write? If not, what would you like to do/what do you do?

I would love to be a published writer but I have a hard time writing something original that I would deem good enough for publishing. I know some people publish their fanfictions by changing the characters’ names and so on but I would be totally unable to do that: if I write something about Steve and Bucky, then it is and shall remain Steve and Bucky. Not John and Thomas. I just can’t.

Have you ever been published professionally?

No.

What is the favourite story(ies) you have have written?

Warm kisses from your cold lips (Captain America, Stucky)

Take it off (Shadowhunters, Malec)

A man’s best friend (Fantastic Beasts, Gradence)

In Death’s palm (Captain America, Stucky)

Why is it/are they your favourite(s)?

Mostly, it’s because they mean a lot to me. The ideas for these stories struck me like lightning and I was completely frantic/obsessed with them. I just really, really needed to write them and I, for once, really liked the result.

What is the least favourite story(ies) you have ever written?

Maybe Carry my heart gently (Supernatural, Destiel).

Why is it/are they your least favourite(s)?

Maybe because I loved the idea so much and I feel like I can’t do it justice? It’s not finished though, so maybe I’ll get it right eventually?

What is something you expect from a fanfiction?

The pleasure of reading a nice story in which I’m thrown into, with the characters I love and their personality from the original works, even in AU, although I’m flexible when it comes to their personalities with AU (if you’re writing about abuse, you can’t expect the characters to react in the exact same way as in the original work where he/she’s not abused.) Slow plots/too much crack/too OOC stories tend to bore me.

How do you feel about troll fics?

No.

What is your favourite writing style?

I like something natural, something that flows. I’m all for metaphors, except those that make you feel like the writer had to burst a nut and break their brain to find them.

Do you write for the sake of popularity?

No, I write for myself and the fans. Most of them enjoy it (again, from the comments/kudos I receive) and that’s great, I’m not doing this to gain followers/be worshipped.

Do you think fanfiction is a good way to get into writing?

I think so, yes. It may be easier (which doesn’t mean lazzy, like I’ve seen some people say) to start with fanfiction and characters you already know and love. You can focus on creating your AU world, your plot, your depictions of the characters while having a focus point. Then you can start twisting the personalities/characters if you want to, you can literally do whatever you want (with a bit of constency along the story.) It’s also great to have the feedback from fellow fans who will honeslty tell you what they think of what you did with their favourite characters and in my experience, most of those readers will actually encourage you and help you along the way if you feel like maybe the story/plot/descriptions aren’t good enough. People tend to give constructive criticism when they do criticise or draw your attention to a plot hole/fact that you hadn’t noticed, too caught up in your story.

What is something you like about the fanfiction world?

The easy way to publish and have feedback. It’s so hard to actually get published IRL... While it is really easy to leave a comment on a fanfiction you read online. So comment! I see too many people reading and liking/subscribing/bookmarking but leaving comments is actually the best way to show your support to a story and/or an auhtor.

What is something you dislike in the fanfiction world?

The fandom wars and endless discussions about who tops/bottoms in a male/male relationship. Some people can’t see past that which is disrespectful (for starters.) Also, as I said before, people who will read something they know they don’t like and then feel like commenting with I hated this story. Seriously?!

What is a pairing you’re currently shipping?

Magnus/Alec (Shadowhunters)

What is something canon you will never ship?

I don’t actually have any ideas right now... Or maybe Pocahontas and her second boyfriend whose name I have forgotten? I actually pretend I never saw Pocahontas II, hush.

What is something fanon you will never ship?

I can’t think of anything at the moment...

In conclusion: any writing advice?

Good God no. Do what you want, do what you have to do to enjoy yourself and your writing. Don’t tell yourself I have to write like this other, super popular writer. Write however and whatever you want to write. But then again, don’t take my advice if you don’t want to. You’re free.

#Long post #Tagged #Writing #Fanfiction

[ao3feed-castiel]

I'm Still Working on It (To be named later)

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2EOmeRM

by Swlfangirl

This is a fic I started for my girl Beth who wanted some Jack fic where he wasn't being shipped with anyone. So, of course I made him a toddler and will eventually get to a destiel adoption vibe with it all I'm sure. I have no plans, I don't know where this is going; hell I don't even have a title so any and all (constructive) advice is welcome. lol

I might be able to switch this summary/title out when I get a bit deeper into the story <3

Words: 1608, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Supernatural

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Characters: Castiel (Supernatural), Dean Winchester, Jack Kline

Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester

Additional Tags: Canonical Character Death, (Kelly Kline), Adoptive uncle/dad! Castiel, Slow Burn, Jack is a toddler, Castiel is ooc maybe, I don't know, more to be added later - Freeform

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2EOmeRM

#IFTTT #cas #castiel #spn #supernatural #ao3feed

[verobatto]

It's Always been You.

I love you

Destiel Meta. 15x18 meta.

Keeping the fire burning in our hearts, i can't believe what we just saw last night, and i have to keep screaming about this historical scene.

I wrote this meta with my friend's huge help @mrsaquaman187 , because we needed to talk more about body language. Because the scene was perfectly played by Jensen and Misha.

And i want to say thank you to my dearest friend @spnsmile because she made amazing gifs for this analysis. Love you girl!

Before start this meta, i want you to read a meta i wrote two years ago, and i want to share it again with you today.

Break the jar and do it again. The slow construction of Destiel Canon

Okay, now, let's start this journey...

Castiel's honesty at his purest form

I will analyze word by word, because this is historical, as I said before. So, let's rewatch the scene together, the scene in which Castiel released himself, and allowed for the first time, to be happy. (I want my angel back 😭).

“I always wondered, ever since I took that that burden, that curse, I wondered what it could be, what...what my true happiness could even look like. I never found an answer. Because the one thing I want...it's something I know I can't have."

Well, my friends, as I yelled in my Destiel meta you can find here, is canon now that Castiel was wondering what would it be to have Dean not just as a friend, but as a lover, and I'm.... Okay. (Internally screaming).

And damn @weird-dorky-little-deana and her post here in which I screamed again, this is it, my friends. Is perfect. Because is all along what I was suspecting... Remember 14x09, Pamela represented Dean's fem side, Dean's subconscious, so, in conclusion, Pamela was Dean talking to himself and saying :YOU WANT WHAT YOU CAN'T HAVE. Is because Dean thought CAS didn't love him back, and Cas saying he can't have Dean is a huge parallel because it shows the way it was constructed. Both men thinking they can't have each other. Is perfect and angsty and so romantic.

"But I think i know...I think I know now. Happiness isn't in the having. It's in just being. It's in just saying it.”

This is such a deep thought and it talks about Castiel's maturity of character. He understood once for all, that loving Dean Winchester, feeling what he feels for him, and expressing that to Dean, is his true happiness. Because...

METATRON: "(...) You draped yourself in the flag of Heaven, but ultimately, it was all about saving one human. Right?"

Dean didn't know it

Dean: “What are you talking about, man?”

Dean's question shows us he didn't know what Cas was trying to say, he didn't know Cas was about to confess his love for him, he didn't know Castiel loves him back the same way Dean loves him.

Cas: “I know. I know how you see yourself, Dean. You see yourself the same way our enemies see you. You're destructive and you're angry and you're broken. You're...you're 'Daddy's Blunt Instrument.' And you think hate and anger, that's...that's what drives you. That's who you are. It's not. And everyone who knows you sees it.

I just have to put everything in red because, OMG, people, this is Cas in the barn all over again but after 11 years of being with him and truly sees through him, and this is Cas in the golden room:

CASTIEL: What is so worth saving? I see nothing but pain here. I see inside you. I see your guilt, your anger, confusion.

This time answering himself, this time, healing all the weight and the pain Dean could carry inside. Because Dean deserves to be saved. That's why Cas gave his life again for him.

Even now, with Billie outside saying IT AS ALWAYS BEEN YOU, and naming him like the rebel, Cas rewords all of that, and shows Dean why he is all of that, because he is GOOD.

Oh Lord, okay, everytime I see Cas smiling and saying those words i have to repress my tears, but...

"Since Castiel laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost!"

No, sister, he was found.

Castiel is rewording each bad comment or mocking angels had done based on his romantic love for Dean, he is saying , yes since I met you in Hell, i was found, you changed me, I fell for you. Damn... Dean go get back this angel because I swear...

But now, i want to share with you my friend reading about their body language on this scene.

@mrsaquaman187 wrote:

"Here is interesting because usually with conversations like these Dean would get upset or strut around then disagree and blame himself for something. BUT he doesn’t do that this time. Which leads me to believe he knew what Cas was going to say... you can see his face stiffen, intense eye contact and he clenches his jaw. Which tells me he is MAKING himself listen. He knows what’s coming and he has made the decision to HEAR it."

@mrsaquaman187 wrote:

Gif 1:

"Here he’s trying to hold it together. He’s swallowing back tears because he wants to see this conversation through to the end."

Gif 2:

"Oh this one is fascinating because he’s not moving. This means he’s no longer trying to be sure of what Cas is saying. He definitely knows what he’s going to say. Also if you look at his eyes, his pupils are dialated. Fun fact: when you’re looking at someone you love, your pupils dialate."

If you are still alive, i just want to point how romantic is this, because he is saying that Dean changed him for good. And he is naming all their family, Sam, Jack, and humanity, the world. Dean. So practically, Cas is saying, Dean showed Cas how to take care of others. Damn...

But also....

ISHIM: The way you let those simians talk to you... Castiel, when did you get so gooey? You know why we're meant to stay away from them humans? Hmm? It's not because we're a danger to them. They're a danger to us. Case in point.

CAS: Well, my friendship with Sam and Dean has made me stronger.

Castiel rewording again, because he knows what Dean did on him, Dean changed him for good.

I Love You

@mrsaquaman187 wrote:

Gif 1:

"Hmmm this one is a mixture of disappointment and denile...he’s basically thinking “you can’t be leaving me again”. His slow blinking and calm appearance indicates that he’s sort of asking out of disbelief or denial."

Gif 2:

"My poor boy had so much to say! Here you can tell he realizes what Cas was saying...he gets the meaning but can’t get his response out. He starts with the head tilt which signifies endearment and fondness. He swallows hard which represents the nervousness he feels and the sadness he feels. And then you can see his lips twitch and turn into a light smile along with his eyes softening. So he understands that Cas is confessing to loving him. And he understands that Cas has been holding it in and hurting the whole time. Which is why he tilts his head. The hard swallow is because he’s being loved but wants to love back and has no idea how to express that. All he could manage was “don’t do this Cas” which along with the body language equals to “Cas don’t leave me”.

I'm crying again, damn...

Okay Dean is shocked, shocked because he just figured out Cas loves him, Cas had loved him this whole time!! Is a huge, huge revelation to him, because Dean didn't imagine his best friend would feel the same for him! That's why he always thought he couldn't have Castiel the way he wanted to.

"I can see the love inside of you, but is croaked in shame."

Shame because it was his best friend, a pure, beautiful angel, out of his league. But now... This angel is confessing he had been in love with him the whole time! And not just that but he dies after that!

Dean losing again the love of his life after knowing he loved him back, is a new level of shock and despair to him. So Dean's reaction is just accurate and perfect!

And the scene crying alone in silence, not answering Sammy's phone call is SO SO IMPORTANT! He forgot about Chuck, about the world ending, about everything, because he only could think about Cas, and how he just lost him, and how he loves him the way Dean loves him, this whole freaking time.

To Conclude:

This was the most beautiful Destiel scene until now, and i only hope for the second Destiel canon scene, in which Dean will said I LOVE YOU TOO to his angel, closing his ILY journey, and rescuing Castiel. Maybe with the reset button, maybe entering into the Empty. But this is not the end, my friends, is just their starting.

Hugs! Love you all!

Tagging @metafest @gneisscastiel @emblue-sparks @magnificent-winged-beast @weird-dorky-little-deana @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @mybonsai1976 @anarchiana @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @destielshipper221b @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @feathered-castiel @bre95611 @zoerayne2426 @justmeand-myinsight @that-one-fandom-chick @proccastinate @studio-hatter @pepevons @poorreputation @mrsaquaman187 @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @dwstiel @thislunarkiss @ladygon @shippsblog @la-random-fangirl @lets-try-this-again-please @mychemicalobsession514 @destiel-shipper-11

@asphodelesauvage @2musiclover2

Buenos Aires November 6th 8:54 PM

#destiel #destiel meta #15x18 meta #spn spoiler #castiel meta #castiel #dean winchester #dean winchester meta #meta spec

[verobatto]

TFW: Time to rewrite your stars.

(The Phoenix Complex in Supernatural characters development. S14 spoilers)

Hello fandom! I just wanted to write something about the exciting idea represented in this season: Growth Time.

I already wrote about this Phoenix Complex before in my "breaking jars" meta, and how Supernatural used it as character development. This season 14 is showing us how our beloved characters slowly but certainly... Are arriving to fullfill their inner circle.

Sam from the "child with demon blood" to "there won't be new king of hell"

Since the beginning, Sam was marked with this "destiny" to fulfill, written by the unfortunately events that made Mary took the wrong decision.

You could say he was "screwed", surrended by demons in disguise, controlling all his movements. It was written... This kid with demon blood should rise with Lucifer, bring the Apocalypse and rule the world.

But even so, he's Sam "fucking" Winchester, he fought against all written destiny, against all bad decisions and he sacrificed himself for the good and his own ideas and perceptions about what is good. That was a triumph, but not the only triumph he had.

We could say his destiny was OPEN HELL GATE AND MAKE HELL OF THIS WORLD. But instead of that... He tried to closed hell's gate like a brave warrior looking for redemption in season 8.

I really believe this is Sammy season too. Episode 1 showed us a huge character growth, a bright Phoenix resurfacing from the ashes, screaming to every word written about him and his destiny, that here's is where this must ended.

Gif credit @itsokaysammy

And how glorious way to closed that hateful destiny. He rules his own path. He says "ENOUGH!" To those demons, but also, to his past with them. We won't come back to those black days. He even saw his prison guard, Lucifer, died in front of him. The victory is by his side.

This path of self knowledge and self acceptance is about to end. He's not anymore this guy with so many regrets and so many incomplete desires. He even had the opportunity of reconciliation with his mother, that profund wound, healing with forgiveness.

Jack from son of Lucifer to son of Kelly Kline

What a most impossible changing destiny Jack had. The living son of Lucifer itself. What a dark path was extended in front of him. The darkest panorama.

But nevertheless... He wasn't only Lucifer's son, he was also Kelly Kline's son.

Kelly Kline erased that dark path, and brought a new one, full with kindness and love, to his son.

He's part of this family now, he was filled with goodness and firm ideas about what is worth to fight for. And he's is the youngest warrior, but not the less brave.

He even visited his grandparents and meet them. Was the reaffirmation of his human roots, his good roots, and that was huge for his self knowledge.

There's too much things for him to learn... Loosing his grace as a Nephilim was a new reborn, he's learning now how to growth again in self acceptance. But with all those dad's surrounding him, it wouldn't be so hard for him.

Castiel from Angel of the Lord to Winchester's Angel

This is an amazing transformation. And I wrote a lot of him and Dean in my other meta talking about the Breaking Jars and Slow Construction of Destiel Canon.

Here is the link

So... Everybody remembers our Badass Angel from the earliest seasons...

Both gorgeous gif credits @magnificent-winged-beast

Yes, this Angel of the Lord with a mission, with faith in the Sacred Oath and in God, with a thousands of brothers, one of the best soldiers in Heaven, changed everything for humanity. For the Winchester Family. He rewrite his Oath, traslating his faith for God, to Dean and Sam. But mostly, to Dean.

All of his bad decisions, taken with good intentions, brought him to depressed states, and always self recriminations.

As I said before, being human was cataclysm for him, and after that, being useful for the battle, slowly twisted to being just there, for his family.

In season 13 we witnessed the huge improvement of the character, if this season wasn't applicable the Phoenix Complex to Castiel, I don't know then where tu put it. Castiel started being dead, facing himself in the Darkness, and by the end of the season, he literally killed his old him, AUCastiel, the Cas that never met the Winchesters, who never fell for love.

Because he had lost everything for them, for Dean, but he also won everything with them.

And in season 14 we're in front of this Castiel. He knows where he belongs, he knows he's part of the Winchesters. And he accepts that without regrets.

IDK you guys, but I see him more human, and emotional. IDK if this bc he misses his human, or bc he IS becoming human by feeling himself as a human...

Dean, from Righteous Man to a man who must love himself

And here we're, at this point with "What do you want, Dean?" Season.

This is the most complex character of the series. Our beloved constipated hunter, needs a lot of breaking to reach the new Dean.

He has this distorted imagen of himself in which he's the Patriarchal protector, some kind of kamikaze who is willing to die and sacrifice himself as many times as necessary for his family and for save the world. He thinks he's expandable, he almost hates himself, for trying again and again to be someone he is not. To fullfil all expectations his father put on his shoulders. He must be the strong, macho, righteous man in charge of his family.

That's why I feel Michael's Possession and the new mark in the non Destiel mark shoulder, will be two strong expositions of what Dean really wants. He must learn, after so many "deaths", to accept who he's, accept what he really want inside and accept himself, then and once for all, he'll be able to love and be able to recognize that his family loves him in return. Bc he is important for them. He matters.

This is Dean's exposure season, in all the aspects. He must to look himself in the mirror, and be honest. Breaking free from his emotional prison. Is time for him to feel loved, to started to love himself, to truly love their family in a healthy way, and to love his angel without shame. I know, it looks like a long journey... But he's getting there.

Closing circles at the end of the journey

To conclude, I want to share this beautiful quote.

"And what if a piece of wood discovers that it's a violin?"

A. Rhimbaud

This is the end of every journey, to discover who are they for real. And accept and love themselves will make them free.

We are there with Sam, Jack, and Cas... We are waiting now for Dean to reach it.

As you have seen... We are almost there, I presume, after writing this meta with a little of melancholy, I could say we are arriving at the end. Of course I can be wrong, and the writers could make the cliffhanger an put reverse in every arc or just put pause, bc hey, I don't write the show, and this just are my thoughts about TFW in this story till now.

Ok! I have to make a big mention here bc @magnificent-winged-beast made those beautiful gif set from Season 4 "The rapture", and she had this accident with an electric storm and lost the work she was doing with the gifs I asked her for this meta especially, and she did it again, and she even didn't sleep the hours she should bc of this gifs and I'm so grateful with her... 😭 Your gifs are the best! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! 💖 You are awesome!!

You can share your opinions and debate, i'd love to read you!

I'm tagging some friends to discuss...

@emblue-sparks @magnificent-winged-beast @silvie111 @mrsaquaman187 @castiellover20 @lykanyouko @agusvedder @lovemesomecas94 @navajolovesdestiel

And everyone who wants to share!

Ja neeeeee!

Buenos Aires, October 23rd 2018 01:25 PM

#phoenix complex #character development in spn #character's growth in supernatural show #tfw #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #jack kline #supernatural meta #my meta #s14 spoiler