#so I had to go back to managing them

[theshadowrealmitself]

Once again thinking about my oc who makes how to do videos that Vulcan kids like to watch, except this time I’m also thinking about “guest stars,” because you just know there’s going to be some things where you need an expert on it for

And originally I was just thinking about pleasant guest stars, and how the Human oc is unknowingly also teaching Vulcan kids how to handle their emotions because the Human is trying a lot of new things that actually scare them, or make them anxious, things like that, but they just calm themselves down on camera and continue doing them

But now I’m thinking about Jim Kirk, specifically aos Jim Kirk, guest starring before he ever became a captain, and it’s “how to ride a motorcycle,” and the whole time, this Human who is usually good at keeping a calm and pleasant disposition, just keeps turning to anxiously tell the camera “don’t do that” because Jim went straight to tricks and stuff that he shouldn’t be showing beginners

Jim Kirk is rewatching this episode as a captain, trying to avoid looking at Bones and Spock as they watch him put himself in danger without proper protective gear on

#bones is about to get his ass #god it was like 12 straight hours with those kids yesterday #they were all under the age of 10 #they might have gotten me sick they kept coughing and sneezing into their hands and then grabbing me as well as touching other objects #they were all sweet kids!! they were just overstimulating and then after like. 7 hours. they had clearly overstimulated each other #so they kept getting into fights every 5 seconds #so I. I cried. #not in front of them #did not yell at them either!! #but I could not handle them anymore #had to walk away and beg another adult for help and that adult went immediately to yelling at them :( #so I had to go back to managing them #yesterday was. so stressful. but it’s not those kids fault that their parents use bbqs to just ditch them wtf #plus I had only gotten a half hour of sleep the night before so I was running on empty the entire time #but I made it through!! #(barely) #kids deserve better #seriously #anyways so I’m back to thinking about ocs who can. actually handle kids. #Star Trek #Star Trek aos #jim t kirk #jim kirk #james tiberius kirk #s’chn t’gai spock #Spock #bones #bones mccoy #leonard mccoy

[lotus-pear]

i think you guys are onto smth..

i unironically got invested in this HELP

#WHERES THE FIC AT IF SOMEONE WRITES THIS I WILL PAY THEM A HUNDRED DOLLARS😭😭 #kunikida serving the country while dazai's serving cunt😔 #dazai was born to malewife but forced to manipulate and i think that's the greatest tragedy of bsd #anyway some facts i would like to share abt this au thay i came up w while drawing!! #takes place in 1939 (start of wwii) and there was a mandatory draft that required one male over eighteen from each house to serve #both of them are still twenty two and had been engaged for abt two years before getting married that year #newlyweds! unfortunately kuni had to go fight and they were seperated :( #before the war kunikida was a math teacher at the local high school and dazai obviously managed the household and didn't work #he's hopeless at cooking and meal prep even w recipie books so they either get those prepackaged meals or kuni makes dinner when he gets ba #so like when he's making lunch for kunikida he normally just packs a basic sandwich w raw fruit #kunikida always appreciates the effort even tho hes probably sick of having the same thing everyday but he won't complain abt it #when kunikida joined the army he was relieved that the mess hall had better food than dazai #he was the only one in his platoon that never complained abt the food so his fellow soldiers assumed it was bc he came from a tough bg #when in reality he was just used to being poisoned on a daily basis from his dumbass husbands cooking and was hardly fazed from army ration #they write to each other although its more dazai sending and kuni receiving bc hes off fighting and doesnt have time to write back #dazai talks abt life on the homefront and how he has to grow a victory garden (everything is DYING HE CANT EVEN RAISE TOMATOES) #and kuni writes abt his fellow soldiers and how the war is going and when he thinks he'll be home and how he misses sleeping in a bed #ANYWAY yea thought i'd share sry for infodumping in the tags again #this post is for like the four ppl that care abt this specific flavor of knkdz so hopefully this gets four notes at least #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #kunikida doppo #doppo kunikida #kunikidazai #knkdz #lotus draws #bro sry for posting at two in the morning i couldnt sleep until i got this out of my head they have infested my brain

[mattodore]

theo’s bedroom is slowly coming together

#river dipping #theodore doe #echthroi #ts4 #ts4 edit #after the save broke yesterday morning for the fourth! time i finally pulled up mod manager and started looking through the hundreds of #conflicts i apparently had and also deleted well over 500+ duplicates... my mods folder is SO rancid i'm sure i missed some conflicts #bc see those dark blue pillows on theo's bed? those are actually white :) but for some reason when i move the pillows near the wall they #change color depending on the time of day... it's not just those pillows some other objects do it too... just closing my eyes at it <3 #the bed and desk are where theo spends most of his time so i spent forever on them. his bed needed to be overwhelmed by stuff #there are... ten pillows i believe two large covers a sheet and a blanket. theo kind of just... burrows into the center and hides. #bunny boy behavior........ and yeah those are matthias's gloves on theo's desk <3 #i have to recolor the stuff on theo's walls later. i imagine his walls are mostly empty and it's just the floors in his apt. that're messy #but i wanted sticky notes to help him remember things and that back wall is going to have matthias's art and love letters #<- which theo definitely takes down and hides whenever matthias actually comes over lmaoooo #also i finally moved all of the pins from theo and matthias's boards over to @theodoredoe (mattodore was taken 😞) #i wanted a place just for my oc boards and i also wanted to be able to add sections to each oc's boards so! new acc! #yk how i mentioned theo's board looking so cluttered? yeah so. figured out it's bc over half of his board is just quotes #i made a section and threw all the 200+ quotes in there and will slowly put some of them in his main board #his board just looks so much better now like i'm so happy about it 🥰 it was definitely worth the time #OH ALSO!!!! IF ANYONE HAS SOME DEAD PLANT CC PLEASEEEE SEND IT MY WAY!!!! #theo really loves just. ripping plants and flowers out of the ground and taking them home to put in little pots but. he always kills them #jsknndkhj so i need dead plants!! limp!! DEAD!!!! #but i seriously can't find any #anyway... that's my build update <3 fr not much has happened bc i've had to start over four :) separate :) times :) but it's getting there. #i miss mattodore tho...... gkhjndfkhjn so i might take a break and get some poses and an edit going soon

[canisalbus]

Is that canon!?! Was Machete just really naive/didn't really understand the implications of his relationship to Vasco? Did his mentor ever find out about them or discuss such things with him? I assume bc he didn't have parents, he kinda didn't get educated on sex or anything. Was it a big shock to realize he was "sinning"?

.

#eh I was just exaggerating it for comedy because the page was so unintentionally funny and fitting #he might've been a little bit naive but was painfully aware he was in a relationship with a man and that it was forbidden #his mentor was all about asceticism and mortification and extreme self-denial #and had drilled it into his head that practically all romantic feelings let alone sex were foolish and sinful and should be shunned #so his feelings about the whole thing were complicated but in the end Vasco was more important #not to sound corny #but there was a hole in his heart that he had desperately tried to fill with god that never seemed to care about him #and once he got some of that love he had been aching for #from another living person #he had to do what it takes to make room for that in his belief system #how could such a tender fulfilling and healing thing be wrong #answered #anonymous #his mentor did eventually find out about them and wasn't very happy about it #to put it mildly #but by that point Machete had managed to mostly inch his way out from under his heel #he was graduating and getting ordained and wouldn't be going back to Naples #if it were up to him he'd never want to see him again

[solcarow]

seafood trio portraits !

+ some alts. with spoilers !

#this is how they look after the 3yr jump 👍 #pretty proud that i managed to capture how i usually imagine them :0 ! been in an art slump so this was a pleasant surprise #idk if ill b able to draw them consistently tho . so these designs r for my brain only #might try to color these but i havent eaten lunch yet so thats a problem for another day #solar-drawss #my art #han sooyoung #kim dokja #yoo joonghyuk #yhk #yoohankim #orv #orv spoilers #omniscient reader's viewpoint #omnicient reader's view point #cackling at how miserable sp and 63hsy look compared to kdj in the middle #her whimsy … shes living her best life rn #……i lied i think i just gave him My face straight up jfc . get that off of u asshole #anyways if u didnt already notice ! yoohan have matching eyebrow scars 🫶 #kdj has one on his nose in that first one #the second kdj has cracks all over her which i forgot to add is inspired by hehearse’s works !! #the reason why they dont show up in the first one is bc aileen covered it up before he went to 1863 #like . hoseki no kuni style ✌️ #fun fact i ​sketched that hsy the night before her birthday skfjsjf had to give up bc it was too late tho #so now im repurposing it for this #NO WAIT I SHOULD JUST GO BACK AND GIVE HSY A CLEFT LIP …. dam lost opportunity. well whoevers reading this just kno she has one now

[laniidae-passerine]

I made my post about Dean Highbottom and then as I was writing my tags realised that his Hunger Games counterpart is Haymitch. and now my head is in my hands and I don’t think I’ll ever recover

#IM GOING TO CRY. I am part of the system I never wanted anything to do with it #I killed so many people without laying a hand on them. I never ever asked for this. I tried to say no. my hands are still bloody. #both turned to drugs to cope. both had a mentee who reminded them of someone they hated so much #(snow reminded the dean of his old friend. katniss reminded haymitch of himself) #both knew exactly how the games worked and all of its consequences because one made it and the other lived it #both lived in the shadows of the past and never really got out from it #but in the end one of them chose to be cruel to the children who they were asked to mentor #and the other loved even when it was killing him #god. twenty three years and they never managed to drown the fire out of him. his heart broke again and again #but he held onto those shards even as they made his hands bleed. and then one day two children appeared and pieced it back together #and some of it was missing and always would be. you can’t undo twenty three years of alcoholism and pain and grief and self loathing #but a lot of it was still there. far more than he ever even believed could have survived #Haymitch I love youuuuuuuuu I will always love you #and Dean Highbottom you were kinda cringe and lame. guynobody ass bitch. do better #haymitch abernathy #dean highbottom #thg #the hunger games #a ballad of songbirds and snakes #abosas

[azaracyy]

to the next stage of our adventure! digimon survive week 2024 day 7: post-game / future personal thoughts under the cut - less about the artwork and more about shuuji and lopmon themselves. a long rambling containing major spoilers and heavy topics. will cause whiplash. proceed with caution.

other than the fact this may be boring and long-winded, cw and tw: there will be mentions of self-harm and suicide. if these topics make you uncomfortable, please step back. if you're sure, then alright. i'm aware this is a weird place to ramble about shuuji and lopmon considering the notorious highlight of their story would match the themes of day 5 (villains) and day 6 (dark & loss) better. unfortunately (ironically?) i never planned to feature them for those days, so... pretty sure i'm not the only one feeling this, but when i discovered that a good part of the fandom seems to loathe shuuji with utmost passion, even after they claimed to have completed the game, i was confused. the way his death happened and (understanding) the cause made me uncomfortable for a while, but never drove me to the point of hate... once i recovered from the initial shock, what i felt towards him was more pity, then respect (on truthful route). i feel shuuji should have been one of the most appreciated characters in survive. yet it was the opposite that happened. (between you and me though, knowing there was this discourse with the fact digimon survive is a visual novel, i'm not that surprised it turned out this way...) from my point of view, lopmon evolving into wendimon then killing shuuji symbolizes suicide, the act of taking one's own life. it was the climax of shuuji's mental breakdown, leading him to basically self-destruct, causing damage to everyone around him and ultimately himself. lopmon evolved, just like he hoped. but failed to do it like other kemonogami partners (maintaining control of themselves and fending off enemies). the next and final outcome was death, through his own partner actually eating him alive too. it reminds me how when someone thought they have prepared well for something important yet it failed spectacularly, the devastation and frustration would eat them in the same way from inside. and they probably would for one second think, "i'm better off dead". the more i pondered about it, the more it hit home, so of course, the last thing i could do is hate him, when his struggles sound similar to my own - having to rely on consistent achievements to prove your value, to feel you are worth living and not a waste of resources. the part where shuuji went all abusive on lopmon felt like the equivalent of pushing yourself to the extreme to reach your goal, to the point of neglecting your own needs. it's like a student so absorbed in their study, sacrificing food and sleep, until their body eventually snaps and shuts down for good (...this in fact happened to one of the students at my previous workplace. she was in her last year of high school. life was just about to truly start for her when her classmate informed us of her sudden death). even in truthful route where shuuji and lopmon survive that point, things aren't immediately nice and easy for him. you can see that he still has self-doubts, and what i think is impostor's syndrome. he could be making a great contribution to the team and still put himself down for having done "nothing". i have found it interesting that artists and writers tend to be especially fond of shuuji. so perhaps it's not just the matter of one's upbringing - whether you were raised in a harsh, competitive environment and/or with family with (unreasonably) high standards so you can relate more easily to him - but also whether one can see just what every struggle shuuji and lopmon went through symbolizes shuuji's mental state. out of all survive characters, i think shuuji and lopmon pulled off this thing called "surviving" the hardest, no joke. which is why i almost always gravitate to drawing them happy because that's what they deserve :') after all this, what i also would like to say is, it's okay if a character makes you uncomfortable. it's okay if you hate a character. but never, ever bring down the character to people who like them or even consider them their favorite or comfort character. if you must, do it in your own space and only with like-minded people.

#digimon #digimon survive #shuuji kayama #lopmon #survive week #survive week 2024 #obligatory shuuji-focused post where i make myself go a bit ✨ extra ✨ #sorry for the long rambling tho i just thought i never had the chance to put this in words and this time i really want to do it #thanks for being patient with me :') #so i didnt manage to post for all days after all but i still have the ideas and sketches #if i ever finish them i will post and tag #if we have another survive week next year i hope i can actually prepare early so i could just schedule posts like a boss #then enjoy every submission without having to worry about finishing my next one #back to commissions starting tomorrow o7 updated my vgen listings recently so feel free to look around if you'd like #let's keep surviving y'alls #png

[cerise-on-top]

Hii love bug!! I’m backkkkk😝 I was wondering if you could do how farah and valeria would comfort you on your period since I’m currently pmsing I’m not sure if you do these type of requests because I know you write for specifically gender neutral but I’m not sure so feel free to decline!

Hey there! Welcome back! Don't worry too much about periods, they're gender neutral as well! Some men get them, some women get them, some non-binary people get them! Besides, I do write gendered reader if I can see any point in reader having a gender! Usually a request works perfectly fine without reader having a gender, though, so I default to gender-neutral readers, so anyone can read my writing!

Valeria and Farah Comforting Their S/O on Their Period

Valeria: She knows the feeling of getting PMS. Hers are, by no means as bad as they could be, she rarely ever gets any cramps that are bad enough for her to feel the need to vomit. In fact, she rarely ever gets cramps at all, she really lucked out on that one. Even all her other symptoms are mild in comparison. However, she’s more than willing to help you out if you need it. While Valeria may not be the warmest person out there, she’ll put her hand on your lower stomach to warm it up a bit if you get mild to medium cramps. If it’s any worse than that, then she’ll either get a bottle and fill it with hot water, or, if she can find it, she’ll get the hot water bottle, fill that one up with hot water and hand it to you. However, if you need anything else, she’ll also grab it for you, be it something sweet to get your mind off things or some meds to help you manage your symptoms. However, she will lightly snicker and poke fun at you for looking like you’re about to die. She’s well aware she can’t talk since the worst she gets are breast pains, but that won’t stop her from doing so anyway. Although she may hate the idea of being someone’s servant, she’ll be your “maid” for the duration of which you’re not doing too well. Makes you tea, cleans your home, gets the groceries for you. Valeria may not show it openly, but she would be concerned for you when you’re shaking in pain, she won’t even mock you ever so gently while it looks like you’re about to die. Will gently rub your back and hope it helps you somehow. She can get you any amount of pain meds, though, just give her the word. 

Farah: Her PMS aren’t as bad either. While she does get cramps, they’re not nearly as bad as they are for most other people. In an hour, two at most, they’re gone. Plus she can still move around as if nothing is happening while she does have cramps. Farah had to learn to live with the discomfort on the battlefield so that it doesn’t get in the way of her victory. A lot of lives are on the line, after all. She probably knows you’re about to get your period soon enough before you do, though. She doesn’t track it, she’s just very observant and makes the right preparations that are needed for you to be as comfortable as you could possibly be under such circumstances. Makes you your favorite food, puts on your favorite music, hell, if you want her to, she’ll even give you a massage so you can relax a bit into her touch and feel a bit better. It’s a painful time for you, but she’ll make sure you’re thoroughly comforted throughout it all. If she has the time, then she’ll cuddle you from behind and put her hand on your lower abdomen so she can warm you right up and possibly help you. If you want her to talk, that’s great, because she will. However, if hearing her voice annoys you, then she’ll just go quiet for a few moments. If she needs to go out to grab some groceries, then she’ll leave you with a heating pad so you’re sufficiently warm, even when you’re shaking as if you’re freezing. While she doesn’t have easy access to them, she, too will get you something for your PMS, some meds. However, if you wanna make the symptoms a bit better so that you don’t throw up as easily, she might get you birth control pills as well. As long as they’re compatible with your meds, if you take any. Will be more gentle with you than usual and make sure to get all the chores done that need doing so that you can rest up for the time being.

#cod #cod x reader #valeria garza #valeria garza x reader #farah karim #farah karim x reader #I haven't had my period in months because of my meds. haven't had any PMS either because of them. life is good #I don't even remember most of the symptoms I got because they were always unpredictable and changing. glad that's over now #I've been a lot happier ever since I stopped getting my period #I'm sure most people would trade their periods for a chicken sandwich. I know I would have back in the day #anyway I don't know how to comfort someone on their period because my PMS were never as severe #I never had to do any work to get them to go away or become milder. I barely got any cramps and even those were manageable #so sorry if this is bad I tried

[sysig]

Stick figure skeletons (Patreon)

#Doodles #UT #Papyrus #Sans #Cutest little lads #I had a good handful of stick figures of them from my 2015/2016 notebook and it really is a cute style #Y'know funny enough now that I think of it lol - Those doodles were also in December! #(I'm tagging these in December still lol hi from the past) #It's that Undertale time of year <3 Apparently I first found it Dec. 17th 2015 hehe #A little late to the party! But not terribly so ♪ And I had managed to avoid spoilers up to that point lol #I do still have some vague memories of watching it for the first time #I watched a Pacifist run first and cried - of course #And then watched a Genocide run soon after and cried even more #I remember being very confused as to what the Fight timing option even was the first time I saw it lol #Since in Pacifist you can go the entire time without even accidentally using it! You can ACT or ITEM instead #It's interesting to think back on such a huge shift in culture on the broadscale #And also a personal milestone :) Something that tipped the scales! #Something that even now I'm grateful for and think of fondly ♥ #And it's all still fun to draw! What more could I ask for haha #I think with this super-simple style in particular I like making their designs complement each other #So Papyrus is all stick lines and Sans has thicker bones #Papyrus' eyes are upright and Sans' are laid flat haha #They both have circle heads to start tho! Papyrus just gets a rectangle grafted on for his jaw lol #They're easy to pose together like this too! #It's fun and silly ♪ Just how I like :D

[puppyeared]

When you backread through a fun conversation you had with someone for hours an angel gets its wings

#I was talking to my brother about Norman doors and I had fun in my UX class and he was telling me about demon cores and the trolley problem #in his class. AND I remembered to take my meds today so I can feel every cell in my body. i can feel the neurons rubbing together #and yesterday I infodumped about the specialists bullseye chart to crow and how it ties with witch hat atelier #WHICH I MANAGED TOGET THEM TK READ IM SO HAPPY. I MAKE SQUEALING GUINEA PIG NOISES EVERY TIME THEY TELL ME WHAT THEYVE READ SO FAR. AHH #i might not even be scratching the surface with witch hat there are so many themes i could not possibly fathom or go over my heasd #and thats what makes it so exciting there are so many spaces in between that you can fill with your thoughts and i. i #waves my hands around manically #for anyone interested in my insane ramblings. the bullseye chart is from are we all scientific experts now by harry collins #in my own words its basically saying everything we know about anything is a game of broken telephone #and it discusses how information gets lost in translation between experts and laymen including things that arent in control #one of the main points was how things that happen between experts are complicated including debates and findings #that you can only really understand thru research and experience in that field and cant be smoothly shared without it being reworded #and risking some of those key points. or even concepts that are hard to understand that cant be shared at all #like if you tried to tell me about how DNA works using words scientists are familiar with but i am NOT- i risk missing concepts that i need #to understand to know how it works on the level you understand. or i risk having it reworded and understanding it but not on that level #AND IT DOES TIE TO WITCH HAT THE WITCH AND NORMAL FOLK COMMUNITIES I PROMISE. ITS SO INTERESTING #anyway i spent hours reading back thru that conversation and i might as well admit it goes for almost every fun conversation i have #and it might be the 20mg of adderall in my body but i am in such a state of peace and love i have to verbalize it. ahh #yapping

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

i think the diamond dogs should play improv games just bc it would amuse me, an ex theater kid, specifically

#ted and beard ofc are reading each others minds #trent is shockingly good at it but only when he forgets to be self conscious #also see: he does both best and worst with ted (best when he's not being self conscious #worst when somehow the prompt gets too touchy or 'romantic' bc Crush Crush Crush Brain Panic) #(please the image of ted in character hugging him or something and trent just. red. brain crashed. no longer improving just frozen. barely #manages to recover and even then it was not subtle. unclear if ted is a) genuinely oblivious b) teasing him and thinks trent knows that #c) something else(??) ) #roy is too stiff most of the time but if he gets really into it he gets REALLY into it. #best way to get this result is to involve phoebe or another child #higgins did community theater at some point and is the one teaching them all the games. beard also seems to have done intense research #but higgins is the one with EXPERIENCE #not that i think beard and ted couldn't have done an improv duo in college or something but in this scenario they did not #nate surprisingly is pretty good at it once he gets into it like it takes him a second but #then he's like. really getting into it and he's very quick on his feet #new way to go mad with power (affectionate): the rush you get when you make the perfect snap back comedic line/acting choice #also while trent is so good paired with so many of them i think he and nate would be a hilarious duo. they're SO funny. #they complement each other well and are both quick & clever #esp if it's about a mutual interest (although one of them taking the lead on something else like nate and music while the other plays off t #em is also good) but like #please i just had the iamge of them basically doing a bit where they're like. those mean old gay muppets in the theater? #like trent and nate improv duoing as some bitchy reviewers just going back and forth and it's so FAST and SO funny #beard records it and posts it somewhere and it goes viral. #god don't even get me started on the idea of some sort of official richmond social media/the gang posting random clips on social media #bc the ideas i have are so funny. #also largely trent centric but what do you want from me okay i'm just a little slut.

[glasswingowl]

caught in your own web, just like your mother

#murder drones #murder drones fanart #murder drones uzi #md uzi #uzi doorman #murder drones nori #nori doorman #glasswingdraws #i've mentioned before how the parallels between nori and uzi are interesting to me #and i really hope we get to see more of what nori was like when she was alive #or just more nori in general because we've all gone insane over the implications of her lmao #most of uzi's papers are copied directly from her conspiracy board #i had to make up/copy most of nori's because we don't know what info she actually had #i had a lot of fun writing articles for the fake newsletters :) #its a shame i made 85% of them too small to fucking read :) #and text editing in medibang paint is a fucking hassle so i'd have to go back and rewrite all of them :) #it's fine i'm fine #also this piece taught me a valuable lesson about layer management #the entire time i was like where is that layer why is that in the lineart folder why is that in the background folder #anyway. hopefully lesson learned #see ya'll after ep 4 drops

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

the absolutely Vivid reality based chronological dream i had last night. man

#i got a job at like... an automobile warehouse or something? #we had to change a large trucks tires... #and i was sent to get some more from across the block or whatever #and its more complicated than that - there were conversations and interactions with people etc #and i was trying to find it but it was all like... in this corridor shopping mall? #the signs were western themed and listed items that you could get in that store #though i think it was all free? #anyway at some point it opened into a restaurant and i had a friend there who was carrying a plate for people who left prematurely #so i of course started shoveling it into my mouth - free food! but their manager caught us #and i had to be all 'hey i work around here im just lookin for tires and no one was gonna eat this anyway' #it was like... a rice/mango/cream thing...? strange because i dont like mangoes! #long story short i had to go back for the tires bc i wound up forgetting them. something about a dog.... #i was too late in getting the tires so i had to go sort rubber bolts instead :/ at least the warehouse was cool #absolutely unprompted #but it was very. linear. and it felt very real. like it was genuinely a place and a job that could exist #like i remember what the outside loading area looked like. the packed restaurant. the corridor. the warehouse. the lockers. the hallway #IF I HAD A BETTER MEMORY I STG I COULD MAP IT OUT #god i love my dreams. they're always plot based and im rarely myself <3

[chiropteracupola]

And you would not believe me if I tried / To tell you all the things I've seen / And all the places that I've been / So pour the hall another cup of wine...

[a cei for @mortiscausa’s ’march to camelot,’ for the prompt ‘kinship’]

#em draws stuff #march to camelot #arthurian things #arthuriana #sir kay #<- not the spelling I usually go for but that's the tag I see most people on arthurian tumblr using for the fellow #I am not nearly as happy with this one as I am with the previous two - it feels stiff and a little overworked #so we're going back to outdoor environments for the next one! #I have a lot of Feelings about cei and how he evolves as a character across authors of arthuriana and I don't think I have managed to reall #Express them in this piece... well an ATTEMPT was made at least. #the way he just FADES out of the stories! it's augh! #also I can't decide whether or not I like the character design for this one... then again Mental Image is a tricky thing with these #it has been maybe eight years since I drew these knights and I only settled on designs for lancelot and geraint back in the day #hmm. shouldn't have given him that wretched haircut but what's done is done #caption lyrics from 'drinking song' by house phone since they had some kind of a vibe on them! #'whee we're halfway done' says guy who is typing this post on march fourth and has already started his next piece #(waited an extra day to post this because I reallyreally wanted to post dissection painting yesterday :3)

[every-sanji]

#one piece #sanji #black leg sanji #everysanji #thriller bark #ch462 #theres been someone whose been slowly reblogging some of my like. really old posts #and doing some absolutely fantastic character analysis in the tags #but oh my god you're reminding me of the cringe captions i used to leave on every post #i did that FOR LIKE. IM PRETTY SURE OVER A YEAR. #IF IT WASNT SO LONG I'D GO BACK AND EDIT ALL OF THEM BUT EUGH #all but one i think the birthday post was funny okay that one was funny and i had to consolidate so much to get it to post on the right day #god. i cant believe this will probably post after the blog anniversary #4 years of every sanji. how do we feel guys #as of queuing this i have uh. 2302 followers and i'll probably have a few more by the time you actually see this #absolutely insane that people still follow this silly gimmick blog i've been running since i was 19 #ik i have said it before but this little project got so big and i dont even particularly care for op anymore #i just keep this blog running for the bit of finding every sanji and watching people be amazed at the really really small ones #that i manage to find in the background. its a special skill you gain by running a blog like this #anyway no more tag rambles i want to try and finish this volume tonight if i can

[softquietsteadylove]

Can you write a story which thena and gil a childhood best friend but one day gil got kidnapped and everyone assume his dead but not thena her family even sent her to a mental institution to make her better, Year after year past she still can't accept gil is gone, then one day Gil appear in front of her out of nowhere and was like "Sorry to keep you waiting"

"Hi, I'm Gil."

She could always remember him being like that--so warm and open and inviting. She had met him as just a little boy, her age, maybe a year older. And when kids are young like that, one year can be a huge difference to overcome, but young Gil had come right up to her, a gap between his front teeth and the biggest smile she had ever seen.

"Wanna be friends?"

The would become the very best of friends. Always together, always doing something, or nothing, so long as they didn't have to be apart for it. He would play anything with her, even if it was a game 'for girls', or 'babies', like her brother would say it was. Gil would collect butterflies with her, or help her learn to braid hair, or set up elaborate tea parties. They did everything together.

Even as they got older, and even as they gained other friends, nothing came between them. Ikaris still always insisted it was dumb that Gil liked playing with his baby sister more than him, but neither of them cared. And Sersi and Makkari never minded Gil playing with them.

Not even starting school divided them. They weren't exactly in the same class, but recess and lunch were their little moments of reprieve. Gil would share the snacks and lunch he got as a growing boy, and Thena would happily trade away the parts of her lunch she didn't like but knew Gil enjoyed. Everything else could wait, whether it was school, or their own circles of friends.

They were barely 11 years old when Gil went missing.

"Hi sweetie," she could remember a police officer kneeling down in front of her. "Do you remember the last time you saw your friend?"

"Lunch," she had answered, feeling completely numb. She had already assumed something was wrong when Gil was nowhere to be found when it was time to walk home together. "We always have lunch together."

"And do you always walk home the same way?"

There were plenty of questions like that. Thena could remember Gil's family and hers mulling around their home, police officers walking in and out all evening. Gil was missing--just vanished in the few minutes no one from the school had eyes on him and before she rounded the corner from her classroom at the back of the building to join him.

If she had been with him just a minute earlier, it could have saved him.

Everyone told her not to think that way, of course. She was put in counselling, but her determination that Gil was still out there somewhere was 'something to keep an eye on'. The word 'obsessed' was tossed around plenty as well, but Thena had more important things to worry about: Gil.

Makkari and Sersi were worried too, but their support exceeded their concerns. They supported her when she said she wanted to go into criminal psychology. They supported her obsession with true crime and morbid and macabre curiosities. Even if they were worried, they understood why she was possessed by the idea of understanding what would make a person do something like that. And more importantly, learning about what would happen during, and then after the abduction.

For all those calling it a sick obsession, it served her well. It drove her like nothing else. She excelled, advanced quickly and aggressively in all she did. Who cared what the reason was? At least she was doing something, unlike everyone who had inevitably given up on him.

The officers who had hounded her with questions?--gone. The judge who deemed the case cold?--nothing. Her own family--Gil's own family! Ikaris believed it too, but every time he tried to tell her to give up for her own well being they just got into a huge, violent fight over it. So he stopped trying to convince her.

Once she had enough knowledge to begin her own investigation, then it was a bridge too far. The worry could no longer wait, and everyone decided that she needed help. Sersi and Makkari pleaded her case, but her parents deemed her mentally unfit. Even Ikaris stood by as she was hauled away into the back of a van, kicking and screaming for all of the neighbours to whisper about.

Let them watch, she figured. It was a good opportunity for her to remind them that they had failed an 11 year old boy because of their blind eyes.

"Go on."

Thena lifts her eyes and then looks back down at her lap. They ask her this every year, around the time Gil disappeared. There are plenty of other routine appointments through the year, but they only bring up Gil and her past at this certain time.

If she just admits that there's no way he's still alive, and that her obsession is a coping mechanism, then she gets to go home.

"He's alive," she claims outright, nailing another stake in her coffin. Her eyes are clear as she looks at the psychiatrist who then scribbles something in her notes. Thena narrows her eyes at her, "I know he is."

"Tell me more about Gil," the psych asks of her, switching tactics instead of locking horns with her. Not that it gets anyone anywhere.

Thena sighs. She has nothing better to do, staring out the window of the office and at the leaves changing. "Gil was...the best."

"Gil was sweet. He was sweet in a way boys usually aren't, especially so young. But he liked playing quiet games or drawing or playing house more than he did roughhousing. Other kids called him names for it, of course, but he didn't care."

She smiles.

"We would play house, and he would braid my hair and wave me off to work," she laughs at the memory of how they thought the world worked back then. "I would come home and he would have a beautiful pretend meal set out for us. He would put on whatever music we could find and ask me to dance for our anniversary."

"That sounds very sweet."

Thena glares at the woman for interrupting her blissful trip down memory lane. But she continues. "Gil was always sweet. Even when we got older, started school, he never stopped spending time with me even though I was a girl, or I was younger than him. He would defend me from older children and I would defend him from just about anyone else."

"He wanted to be a chef," Thena says, and her throat tightens and she chokes on her air. Because he would have become such a brilliant chef, and he would have that smile he always had, and she doesn't even know what he looks like now.

"It sounds like you two loved each other very much."

Thena doesn't bother answering that. No one understands, anyway. Everyone likes to think of their friendship as this precious thing of the past, like they were such angelic things. Everyone acts as if her memories of Gil are all she has left of him.

"Thena," the therapist shifts in her seat as she tries to breach more dangerous territory. "I know how much you love Gil. Can you tell me how this time of year makes you feel?"

Not this bullshit. Thena resists the urge to roll her eyes, looking out the window again. The leaves are changing, and it makes her think of the leaf Gil saved for her the morning he disappeared. He gave it to her before school, claiming he'd never seen a leaf the colour of her hair before.

She still has it. It's one of her few possessions, pressed into an old and worn copy of Robert Frost work. She sighs, "Gil liked poetry."

The therapist resigns herself to being ignored.

"He liked making things rhyme, rudimentary literary devices, jokes and brain teasers," Thena smiles again, now just speaking aloud to herself. "I told him he could be a poet. He said it wouldn't pay well, and then how would we do things like pay mortgages and have two cars?"

"He really thought of everything."

He did. Gil was very forward thinking as a child. He always considered every possible angle of something, despite looking more like a kid who would act first and think later.

All the more reason to believe that he wouldn't have just wandered off with someone, or that he would have found a way to escape if he did get plucked off the street somehow.

"Thena-"

"I believe that's our time," she cuts the therapist off, standing and beginning to walk out the door on her own. She's been here long enough that they aren't quite as strict with her.

"Indeed," the psych stands as well, at least giving her the respect of sending her off properly. "I'll see you next week."

"Can't wait," Thena mutters as she heads for the common area. Sometimes she wonders if prison would be better than this place. At least prisoners are allowed to keep things in their cells.

It'll be winter soon, and she'll think about Gil, wonder if he has to endure winters in some terrible little cellar. Or maybe he did manage to get away, because he was always clever. Maybe he managed to find a new life for himself somewhere.

After a trauma like that, maybe his mentality was so affected he wouldn't be her Gil anymore anyway. A morbid thought, but she didn't study psychology for some delusion that he could be completely unaffected by it all.

She has been in this mental institution for years now, too. Her parents don't want anything to do with her, and she could be released if they weren't funnelling money in to keep her here. All they want is to hear that she's forgotten about Gil completely.

Well, it's never going to happen, so her parents can go to hell.

Thena arrives in the common area, devoid of anyone else this close to meal time. The food is awful anyway. She would rather starve and think about Gil's cookies he would make every winter.

She leans on the windowsill, looking out at the trees. "These woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep."

"And miles to go before I sleep."

She doesn't turn to look at who's joining her. She doesn't much care, and she doesn't recognise the voice, although it is familiar.

"And miles to go before I sleep."

It is familiar. It's soft, and gentle, deeper than she imagined it. Soft steps come closer to her.

"And be one traveller, long I stood," it continues until it's right behind her, "and looked down one as far I could."

"To where it bent in the undergrowth," Thena finishes and frowns. She knows why she knows this poem, and plenty of others from the same volume. But it's rare to find someone else who does.

"Your hair's so long, now."

She stares at the window as gentle hands run through her hair, mindful not to hurt her as they start to wind the locks together. Her throat tightens and she chokes on her air, "y-you still remember how to braid?"

He just chuckles, and it's when she hears the hint of his laughter that she realises this is real. She hasn't finally succumbed to this hell around her and lost it.

She turns. Her hair is half braided down her back, but Gilgamesh is standing there, still just a year older than her, but looking completely unlike he once did. But it's definitely Gil. "You're here."

"It's our anniversary," he smiles at her like when they were children, playing house in her backyard. He holds his hands out, "sorry to keep you waiting."

#Thenamesh AU #honey this is a beautiful prompt #and oh my god this is so sad #but a happy ending! #Little baby Gil and Thena tho? #Ikaris is like playing house is for girls and little babies! #little Gil is like well my wife is going to work while I clean the house all day! #he makes huge feasts for them and pretends to drink a beer from his big grownup coffee mug #I won't be touching on this a lot for obvious reasons #Gil got abducted and kept in a dank little cellar #he had a rug and a little mattress and got fed #he would braid the tassles of the rug and think of Thena #he cooperated slowly gaining trust until he was allowed upstairs #then to go out of the house sometimes #then more often #then alone #until eventually he managed to escape #by that time he was several states over and had no records of who he was with him #but he manged to get back and the first thing he did was ask Where's Thena? #he was furious but he went right there to see her #and now they can get married and have a mortgage and two cars so Thena can go to work and I'm emotional