#that’s actually somewhat related too

[ljesaw]

can’t stop thinking about somebody saying that zuko is constantly going against his very nature in order to be evil and i will be crying about it forever frankly

#do you ever think about little baby zuko loving and adoring his mother #like that mama’s boy is gentle…..underneath…….All That #the complex relationship between zuko and literally every member of his family makes me actually lose my shit #zuko and ozai make me foam at the mouth ozai should rot but i also just love complex crunchy family dynamics #but i also think about at the end of book 1 #and jeong jeong talking about how fire is dangerous because it’s so unpredictable #which also speaks to the way firebenders wield their fire #the typical form that’s used in that they exert a lot of force and power on their opponent #probably largely because there’s truly only so much they can control with their own element #and only really gifted firebenders can master such a fickle element well enough to exert that kind of effort and focus #do you ever think about zuko learning and understanding all 4 elements to better his own mastery and form(s) #this post was supposed to be about zuko’s complexity and the fact that i went on an entirely unrelated tangent #that’s actually somewhat related too #just speaks for itself. one day ill make sense i swear #anyway if this doesn’t make sense. i’ll fix it later. maybe

[bonefall]

a small thing about canon warriors that really rubs me the wrong way is how much play is demonized for literally no reason? there are just. so many scenes where the pov character bats something around and is immediately shamed for it by another character. or they stop as soon as they realize what they’re doing and go “ugh that was so EMBARRASSING i hope nobody saw”

the weirdest example happens in graystripe’s adventure when he chases a butterfly for 0.2 seconds and then is like “oh no being a kittypet is making me act like a kit!1!” as if play behavior is exclusive to kittens and that housecats are only playful because they’re undisciplined and soft or whatever.

realism is usually a non-issue when it comes to canon warriors, but these cats are shown to have intrinsic play/hunting instincts, yet they’re shunned and infantilized by clan culture as well as the narrative. it just makes me really uncomfortable, especially as an autistic person. there is no reason why it needs to be a part of this series, all it does is make clan culture feel that much more joyless and dystopian.

I agree, it IS weird. Graystripe should have followed the butterfly hoping it would lead him home like Moth Flight, and then when it lands on a flower he calls it a slur

Hyperbole of a point being; Clan culture should have a ton of problems, but very particular problems. It's xenophobic, battle-obsessed, ableist, and insular. Its religion is powerful, but can also be used oppressively.

As it is canonically, there's almost NOTHING good about this little society, it's miserable.

They shouldn't HATE playing and have absolutely no downtime. It's brutal and limits the story; the characters can't just hang out. They can't just get to know each other. They can't be alone with their thoughts. It's beyond dystopian.

Anyway it's something I intentionally set out to fix with my Clan Culture expansions lmao. They have games. They throw celebrations. They nap and hang out and watch butterflies. There's still a ton of problems and they value the concept of hard work, but there IS downtime.

Like, it's not capitalist lmao.

#Better bones au #Bone babble #I think it's somewhat related to the writers wanting it to feel like theyre fighting for survivial hunting every scrap of food #But. Stop that. #That sucks actually. You dont need that. It serves the narrative better if they aren't actually starving and just use Starvation Rhetoric-- #As an excuse to exclude groups of people #I am once again asking for canon to have clarity of purpose #For the love of god please stop justifying eugenicist rhetoric because youre too cowardly to admit your fake battle cat society-- #Has a real xenophobia problem

[nostalgia-tblr]

having a vague "why am i writing this horrible story?" crisis about the anglo-saxon au fic that has taken over my mind since *checks* about two days ago. i have approx 2000 words of it written so it is going fairly well in that sense but i have gone a bit niche with my fics recently and am starting to think "nobody wants to read this, people will be annoyed at you if you post this" a bit more often, even though they probably won't because it's a free cake and it's rude to complain about free cake.

#HOWEVER while hits are low the comments are about the same so that's actually my fics doing better really isn't it? #i keep stats hidden on ao3 usually but i occasionally put them back on and look at my stats page #part of switching off stats wasn't MY stats so much as other people's. i do think losing that context makes me feel better about mine. #for all i know 120 hits for a month-old sifki fic is Incredible Amounts of Number Go Up so i may as well just assume it is right? #just as i have MANY silent fans who are too shy to comment or kudos or rec my fic but they LOVE me and i am their FAVE #okay this little pep-talk in the tags has helped somewhat: i NEED to finish this horrible fic for the lurkers who love me! they'll LOVE it! #ps: the missy & jamie moriarty fic has had 24 hits which considering the crossover i am actually very pleased with :D #\o/ #fic related #btw if i start tagging my fic-related posts with the working-titles so i can later track my own thought processes would that be weird? #is that too “anne rice if she had a yahoo mailing list”?

[hyuuukais]

erm .. just applied to college or whateva

#lakes thoughts #literally all math related i am going to yell #pls let me somewhat enjoy math still 🙏🙏🙏 it's been too long i need to practice #auuughhhhh idk how long it takes to hear back i'm gonna throw up #it's actually not even going to go through until tomorrow #but still #auuughgstibst #thoughts have been thunk

[tunapesto]

picking a course makes me want to cry and throw up so bad

#this will set up the rest of my life im afraid #there are 2 viable courses. the others are too complex and will not benefit me in the long run #the two viable choices. one I have experience in bec its somewhat art related #and it has real jobs. but its real rare and kind of underappreciated here where i live #might be hard to apply for #and the other one. i have vague interest in #not much experience however it has great jobs and opportunities everywhere #overall i will learn More and gain more from it probably. its not the most annoying subject in the world #sorry i dont have any figures that i can ask in my life about it hahaha all they say is 'which one would you enjoy more' #ive been in a self aware depressive state for years now i have no real passion for anything #i just do the things i know i can do #i would enjoy either the same normal amount #one where i can hone and expand on an existing skill #and one where i can take up new opportunities and expand my brain . my tool belt if u will #and i would really like either #i will gnaw wood #sorry for oversharing on main this is an actual cry for help heehoo maybe someone out there is going thru the same thing or whatever #it's just a lot of irreversible wasted time and effort and money

[nerdgirlnarrates]

Minor Revelation

Had my meeting with my IM application advisor today, and afterwards I was thinking "hmm, why do I always feel good after discussing applying to IM, but I always feel like shit when I discuss applying to neurosurgery?" Some of it is the relative competitiveness of the specialties (in neurosurgery, I always feel like the bottom of the barrel, whereas in IM I have always been told I’m a strong candidate. Definitely a better feeling). But, I think some of it is that I can be more honest with IM people. I think my academic interests--medical education and quality improvement--are far more valued in IM than in neurosurgery, where I fear at least some people view those pursuits as frivolous. I think being a person with likes and dislikes and opinions is also more welcomed in IM (or at least that’s been my experience). 

 With neurosurgery, I feel a lot more pressure is put on applicants to be as agreeable and conformist as possible. Be friendly, but not too friendly--this has been stated over and over and over when it comes to sub-Is. Never have an opinion because it's not worth the risk of offending someone--also advice I’ve been given repeatedly. And I've been kind of terrified about letting on that I'm a person: I don't want people to know that I’m bi or Catholic or have a boyfriend or like to garden or write fiction or want to pursue med ed. I’m worried any of these things could be perceived as offensive or silly or just Too Much. I've tried so hard to obscure so many things I care about to be A Good Applicant (tm), and I think I'm done. I'm not gonna become abrasive, but I'm gonna stop trying so hard to hide the stuff I like and the way that I am. And if it turns out neurosurgery is hostile to that, then I'll do IM, because I cannot become a professional sycophant. 

I think I’ve been a bit of a coward throughout med school, so terrified of not matching that I’ve tried to reshape who I am, and I’m tired of it. I don’t want to put ambition ahead of my personality and principles anymore. I’m gonna be me, and if it doesn’t work out, then it wasn’t supposed to. 

#I'm not gonna suddenly pick fights or anything #I'm just gonna stop so actively hiding myself in every conversation #like I actually think about how to make sure I don't accidentally reveal I have a boyfriend #because I don't want people to write me off as uncommitted #stuff like that #and it's too much work and I'm not doing it anymore #on the serious side of things #there have also been times where I definitely should have stood up for patients #and I didn't because I was scared #I am...really not proud of those moments #and it's just not who I want to be #so yeah this is a line for me now #either I can be myself or I can walk away #somewhat related I am now determined to get a tattoo fourth year lol #medicine #medblr #med school #medical school #med student #medical student #my content #my text posts

[andresylupin]

Mushishi week, day two: the all-knowing fog (eyes/solitude)

A person burdened by a secret can attract a type of mushi known as the all-knowing fog.

Imperceptible tendrils of fog start to attach themselves to you, and as time passes, the fog will grow more and more and completely engulf you if nothing is done.

Ginko encounters such a case in a village near a river. The woman affected by the mushi is half lost in the fog already.

One way to free yourself of the mushi is to whisper your secret to it. The fog will then dissolves on its own, taking your secret with it. The woman of the village adamantly refuses to do so however, despite Ginko’s insistence.

Ginko then manages to trap most of the fog in a bottle, thus temporarily relieving the woman. Considering he has done all he could, Ginko gets ready to leave, and warns the woman that the mushi is still attached to her, and that the fog will come back to claim her, unless she shares with it what burdens her.

The woman doesn’t answer.

#Mushishi #mushishiweek #mushishiweek2022 #pls disregard that i'm posting this one day too late </3 #anyway with a prompt like 'eyes/solitude' i had to do something somewhat tangentially related to tma #also uhm. obviously in hindsight i should have done a proper embroidery #'cause i did this on a whim but i actually like the idea and now i'm frustrated that i didn't executed it as well as i could have lmao #i think i'll probably undo all of that to salvage the threads #and try and redo it nice and pretty (and not quick and messy) sometime in the future.... #also re: the all-knowing fog. i decided not to make a fool of myself and stick to an english name #but if someone knows how that could be translated in japanese i'm interested!! #(the idea for this mushi is also that there could perhaps be a way to listen to the secrets the mushi absorbed.... #adashino is mighty interested ~) #bibi

[yokoyas]

i also hate tiktok bc the filter system just straight up doesn’t work like when totk came out i filtered for every totk related tag i could think of to avoid spoilers and STILL got tons of totk content on my fyp. including spoilers.

#i have the p*****y tag blocked bc i simply do not care and shippers are annoying #and i still get tiktoks abt it every goddamn day by virtue of being a fob fan. like i can’t start just blocking ppl there’s too many of the #TAGGED tiktoks with the ship name not just like somewhat related content #and like that’s not the actual issue. the issue is if i was trying to filter an actual trigger it just straight up wouldn’t work #which is ultimately like. idc i hate tiktok anyway but it’s still fucked up #personal ramblings

[faerociousbeast]

olaying another dangan fangame sorry. and hes a PUZZLEMASTER??? ESCAPE ROOMS AND SHIT?????? i love him SO MUCH but he is SO death traitor coded

#ARGHHHH ALL THREE OF THE ONES I LIKE ARE DEATH AND ANTAG CODED SOMETIMES BOTH 😭😭 wow man wtf man #also of COURSE the first thing the white haired red eyed and the black haired blue eyed do is argue. over a black and white painting #ART PKEASE STOP HANGING OUT WITH LYLE HE IS CODED #he did the shin hand hes 100% going to not think of himself as an antagonist but spiral into a circle #of mistrust and confusion #also how come the guys i like i can relate to somewhat. naybe thats the appeal #I LOVE FORTE #I LOVE CYRUS TOO HIS NAME IS THE BESTRTT #i like everyone actually which SUCKS BC THEY JUST ANNOUNCED THE KILLIMG GAME PART #NOOOO #message to all bitches PLEASE FUCKING SURVIVE #they will not #fae plays stuff

[absintheancandle]

may i draw yubinya and tag you in it? i just. love him a lot and his design is Yes

oh, absolutely! we're 100% open for anyone drawing anything of the asphodel cast. i'll be honest here, i don't really consider them ocs since we're intending for them to be for something publicly playable, so really, nobody needs permission to draw them as long as the characters aren't being claimed as your own.

i would say keep in mind that all the designs are quite tentative due to this being in such early stages but i don't think that should really deter anyone from havin fun 👍!!!!

#answered #i'll ramble about stuff related to this in the tags but it's not too related to the actual anon #i may be jumping the gun but i think about how fandom exists in regards to media and it gets attention #the only way these characters belong to me is the fact i'm the one that's somewhat leading the project to make it #i know this potentially opens up some.. strange possibilities if people wanted to draw strange stuff. but i'm honestly prepared. we all are #UHHH I DON'T KNOW. i just think it's neat they aren't ocs to me. technically neither are the dolls from a while back. #which i still want to work on those lol i just got preoccupied with asphodel #TLDR YOU DON'T HAVE TO ASK FOR PERMISSION! WE'D LOVE TO SEE THE ART AND I'D PROBABLY PASS IT AROUND TO THE OTHER PEOPLE WORKING ON THIS #we love this project a lot! seeing how people respond to it is very nice and seeing people draw art makes us excited and happy! #I WANT TO TALK MROE ABOUT WHAT WE'RE DOING but we're so early in on this that the current manager of the project is like. #you shouldnt do that yet. AND IM LIKE YEAH MAYBE YOURE RIGHT. I JUST. AUAUAUAU im SO EXCITED. IM SO EXCITED TO TALK ABOUT IT. #WE'VE DONE SO MUCH AND IMA UHG AUZDG HADUIGH Isuhgusd. #j. let me speak.. please. . .. LKJGHFDH #pretty much /all/ i can talk about is individual character backstories

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Actually I'm not done I still haven't gotten over that one time I told my closest friend (who's very allo) that Meredith and Cécilia were in a QPR and they were like 'aren't they just friends? or are they dating?' Because I myself wasn't sure where I wanted to go so it made me doubt what I wanted but no!! They don't just fit neatly into a box or two!! And isn't that wonderful? I've always yearned for relationships that fit a specific box so I do that with my OCs but there's such a Vibe to characters that are a little of something some more of something else one of them considers the other their x the other doesn't but thinks they're y they go through those depending on the stages of their relationship and also just circumstances and they do whatever because really does it matter what the word you put on it is when you're just there with them? Love the simplicity of a relationship fitting a neat box but also the freedom of the relationship not entirely filling one box and overflowing out of another. Also like Meredith and Cécilia are two different types of self-inserts so on top of the frustration with the classic 'the relationship has to be this specific type and nothing else will do!' there's also a personal level to it because that's how I do relationships and saying that I should do them differently is uh. Yeah. My friend just didn't get it and I don't think they do even now because they're maybe a little too allo for it but that was just an honest mistake though. I wish everyone knew about aspec terms and understood those orientations but alas.

Oh and while I'm on the relationships between my OCs every time I see something about Jedi Masters being like their Padawan's parent I gnash my teeth a little. Why does it need to be a nuclear family?? Why does it need to fit a neat little box?? Sure it can be like this, and if you're responsible for a lot of that kid's education it would be perfectly normal to feel like they're your child in a specific way, but it doesn't have to be this and always reducing it to a parent-child relationship is like trying to limit the scope of human relationships to me! Korcha is based on a teacher of mine and she is in no way her Padawan's parent, though she is definitely family. They have a mentor-student relationship, though I suppose Lineth is a bit more complicated because it was war and she's a very - sensitive person. Reil and Devafe are like cousins, like the older cooler cousin you can ask about *whisper* sex when you don't want to ask your parents, or the younger cousin who reenacts Markiplier videos to you but they're fun to play with and you're fond of them anyway. This doesn't need to be parent-siblings!! It can be and it's fun but it doesn't have to be!!!

#also both of those are tangentially related to my feelings about obi-wan and anakin but are we here for this? #... well yes but mostly no. oc time not blorbo time #i've never really felt like people were family? i guess my actual blood family somewhat #i mean that's my parents who raised me and my brother i grew up with #but i can't pinpoint exactly what a familial feeling is like tbh #so it's always been weird to me when people are like 'she's my sister!' 'they're my child i've adopted them!' no?? #not that i'll go around telling people what type of relationship they can have obviously #it just deeply bewilders me #so that tends to show in my ocs too #lots of big feelings in my heart huh #anyway #wow i have a ramble tag now #wow i have an ocs tag now

[astrxealis]

saw someone say the new g’raha tia official art has him in “that eboy pose” and i can’t stop thinking abt it. hilarious

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #⋯ ꒰ა ffxiv ໒꒱ *·˚ #it is genuinely unfair though for him to be so WOW. he is so wow #the pose makes me want to bully him a bit but moreso i am just. wow. he is so >____< ......... <3 #i am so unbelievably smitten w him it is unreal #NO BCS. i'm embarrassing myself now but literally ahbhbjhsdbh just the simple thought of him makes me smile T___T #and then wnvr i feel sad i really just need to listen to some of his themes or songs from xiv i associate w him ... #and then g'raha happy makes me very happy as well and idk man he's just. my happy pill. i fall in love all over and over again always #he is literally my muse ;; my inspiration ;;; he's the reason why i properly got back to writing !! #i started actually writing poetic things too bcs of him/ffxiv jhbahjbhjbgjh idk he just really is my inspiration >_< #and he has something that ties all my favorite characters together? dima w being somewhat related to royalty and sandy has quite a few #but i think most notably is that the fact i even knew who g'raha was is bcs i saw him through the ffxiv acct of a gbf twt person !! #and i do have a bit of a habit of liking fictional characters for their looks which isn't necessarily a bad thing + that definitely isn't #the main thing i like :O but it has to fit that vibe yk? raha fits the whole red thing and then CAT and then gold and aaaa crystals ... #stars too !! and i first knew him bcs of his voice and not how he looked so. idk BEHJG it's not that big of a thing but <3 #a. i meant for this to just be a quick post abt the new art but then i have now rambled abt how i love raha sm LMAO #idk he's just really the epitome of comfort character :')) for me !! #and he also reminds me of myself ... but also my ideal type ... he's just perfect to me hjhsbghjbdjh ;;; #tag later

[icharchivist]

my big Sandalphon mochikorin rarely falls off my bed unless my boyfriend knocks him off or something during the day, though that's because when i am sleeping he is often permanently squished between my face and the pillow and/or in a death grip hug of some kind so he is in a different kind of hell

HELPPP

i feel you thought here's some plush like that who can survive any sort of horrors like that.

though "unless your boyfriend knocks him out" feels somewhat appropriated. Like Beelzebub and Belial coming to break the happy couple up in canaan. Needs to fucking yeet Sandalphon away.

it's a different kind of hell, but it's your heaven, efficient system isn't it?

#i sleep with a dozen or so plush -- probably more but too lazy to count rn #but i somewhat have a system that they rarely fall off the bed #though eventually the plush i sleep with in my arms with will often end up yeeted somewhere else in the bed #(the bed is huge so that helps a lot) #funny enough everytime i slept with my dragon knights plush or my a3 plush i would lose track of them during the night #like would wake up like where the fuck are they and looking everywhere for them in the bed #always getting lost in the blanket or something #... anyway my custom plush of Mystery Blorbo (which is slightly smaller than my others chara plush) #actually somehow managed to always be in my arms when i wake up still #i legit barely ever lose it to the blankets. it makes me feel insane. #unless i yank them like by removing my sweater or throwing the blanket? they stay there. #i'm being super normal about it i swear. #(i do however lose them on the sofa when i move there for the day bc i never remember where i put it. BUT THAT'S DIFFERENT.) #.... it has a point related to the ask i hope you don't mind me rambling there im normal i swear #ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous

[tarraxahum]

Was saying for a while now that Speed is very much neurodivergent (dare I say autistic) and the movie especially went for that pretty directly, but my fucking god I did not remember they literally had a bully call him an r-word and immediately get punched in the face for that

#I will say that interpretation of his character doesn't go very well with all the 'Speed Racer is a sociopath' clips going around #related to the original 60s anime of course #most of those are either related to him not hesitating to kill bad guys in retaliation unlike a typical cartoon hero #or to him being blunt and at times rude - and also determined to win and refusing to botch the rules for someone else #which. idk the first one is just good writing I think #and the second one is hardly a sociopathy description #could very well however be something else... you know #not reading tone and being too blunt #refusing to throw a race 'cause rules are rules and also that wouldn't be a victory if it's just given #etc etc #my boy is too focused on racing proper #ethics are hard #and throughout the show it's clear that he isn't above helping people! he does that a lot actually #but to throw a race out of pity? whuh? #still need to watch the 90s reboot in full but from what I remember he's somewhat closer to the movie there #kinda aloof when not behind the wheel and has so much shit just whooshing over his head poor guy #...New Adventures and Next Generation and god forbid Race to the Future are on thin fucking ice #maybe one day I'll catch up on them proper just to put that notch down #but UUUUUGGGHH #gosh I wish Tatsunoko did something new with him. his cameo in that one anime was so damn cute. #but instead I'm dreadfully waiting for the news on the promised AppleTV series #I don't trrrrrust but we'll see #hire actual Japanese actors I triple dare you. #damn an old hyperfixation knocking on your door is one hell of a ride

[chisungie]

.

#??? TIL there are more dudes in diabolik lovers than just the. first batch of sakamaki bros. mukami bros. the S.o.S dudes #genuinely forgot their name or if theyre related but their duo song kinda banged #their last name was tsukinami apparently theyre brothers?? idk i had a hard time watching that anime overall #and i think those 2 like jusg got introed after the mukamis I FORGOT IDK but ive never heard of kino sakamaki tf #JPN VA TOMOAKO MAENO? when kino looks like that?? huh? 🤨 #fav food konpeito.. kino are u.. hokuto hidaka as a vampire /no #THE GUY WAS CREATED BY MIASMA? CAN I NOT READ OR WHAT #“similar to ayato” and willing to conquer yui to become adam uHGKNG I HATE HIM ALR. which is funny bc i tolerate ayato #wait new guy and tomoaki maeno means a new banger song for this guy right?? ayyy 🙏 #went thru chara list n was gonna say only maybe yuma and ruki treated yui somewhat alright but thats not true. not at all 🤔 #i wanna say shu was ok but i cant really rmr 😭 garden scenes and ruki locking her.. for her protection? i forgot.. these guys r no bueno 💀 #anyway. confusion and a short trip down nostalgia lane for me. dont watch dialovers if faint of heart but feel free to check out the music👍 #i kinda miss the music now that i think abt it actually alsksld parhelion logic and eclipse were softer but they BANGED #some of the first batch of sakamaki solos also slayed too tbh #44597