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aria0fgold · 2 months

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In this world, the storm will pass

Alec sat atop the railing of the balcony, looking up at the sky as it slowly dims to reveal the countless stars awaiting the night to be seen, to twinkle at the life below the vast sky. A cigarette placed between his lips, smoke rising up to the stars that he can only dream of reaching someday.

His eyes were vacant, what was once a vibrant blue, like the sky in a cloudless sunny day, is now merely as dull as the sky in the fog, in the stormy weather that never left. But it's getting better now. Slowly, slowly… Like clouds drifting in a windless day, moving an inch, yet moving still. Slowly… The storm will pass. But for now, he'll stay in the eye of it.

Standing beneath the stars surrounded by a quiet storm all kept inside. In this world, everything is the same, yet different. In this world, everyone is alive, safe from a greater danger than life itself. In this world, Alec is supposed to be dead, yet here he is… Someone else. In this world, his family lost Alec, yet in his world, he lost everything.

So what is he doing here then? Intruding in a world that didn't need someone like him. An Alec that was doomed to have nothing, living in a world that has moved on from Alec's death. He doesn't know, doesn't understand. He gave up understanding the world ever since that day, the day where it collapsed, leaving him with nothing but ruin. He always thought that, it would be better for him to have lost himself to the forest instead than be brought here by whatever force, whatever power, whatever God, who thought it entertaining to put him here, in this world. Is it fun? His life… to be toyed with by fate, by the world itself, is it fun? He gave up wondering about it, gave up on an answer he didn't need to hear.

Alec took a drag on his cigarette, frankly, he isn't one to smoke, he isn't one to drink, he isn't one to do any such things. But what does it matter anyway? His body… won't sustain any damage from it anymore. It's different. Everything is. Nothing was ever the same ever since his world started collapsing. Nothing was. So it didn't matter, whatever damage he does to his body didn't matter, it'll just heal it all anyway. Leaving not even scars on his skin, what a picture perfect body, devoid of scars. One would wonder if he ever went through such things, when there's nothing for him to show for it.

Alec glanced down, it was pretty high. This house, this balcony on the third floor. He gave up on that thought long ago though, it was the only constant he has left, his will to live, even after everything. Foolish, isn't it? To continue wanting to live even after all that, for what reason really? He doesn't know anymore, his memory isn't as good as it was before. So much so, that he's guilty of forgetting what his family looked like. Had he not been living in this world, he would've forgotten their names too.

Alec looked up again, to the pitch black sky, the stars brightly twinkling at him. Back in his world, he found solace in the night, in the stars above. He thought of them as his family watching over him, was it a myth he read back then? The souls of your loved ones becoming stars in the night sky. What of it now, however? In a world where everything is okay, is his family's souls still amongst the sea of stars, watching over him like they did before? What would they think of him now? Would they be happy? Glad? Relieved? Or would they be mad? Upset? Betrayed? To see Alec be happy with someone that's them yet aren't at the same time?

He doesn't want to think about it.

Just as Alec brought the cigarette to his lips to take another drag, the hand of another reached out to take it from his own, he didn't need to turn around to know who it belonged to. He knows it already, by heart.

“You okay?” Ray stood beside him, leaning on the railing as he threw the cigarette to the ground. Putting the fire out with his slippers.

“You're going to ruin that pair soon if you keep that up…”

“Well, that's fine. I forgot to grab the ashtray on the way.” Ray hummed, “You dodged my question again though.” His voice had a slight teasing tone, mouth formed into a small grin as he glanced at Alec.

“It's always the same answer, anyway.” I'm fine. That's the answer he always gives to that question, every single time. He knows it's a lie, they know it's a lie, but what else can he say when words aren't enough to convey whatever he's been feeling ever since then?

“I don't mind that. Maybe, once a lie is repeated enough times, it'd come true someday.” Ray chuckled, “Though that sounds a bit dangerous, now that I think about it.”

Silence fell between the both of them, it isn't heavy nor is it tense. It was comfortable, like the breeze of the night. Ray looked to the sky, and Alec… he looked to Ray's eyes. It was as dark as the night sky, reflecting the countless stars twinkling high above with a light all too familiar yet not at the same time. This is Ray, yet not his Ray. That is Ray, one who've turned into light, amongst the sea of many others, high above the sky, a bright twinkling star. In a way, he did become a ray of light, just not that of sunshine as he would always say.

Alec moved his eyes towards the sky once more, and the two stayed there, in the silence, below the night sky, underneath the stars, they bathed in the light of a hundred promises, a thousand wishes and a million hopes for a future gentler than their present.

#ariawrites #ariaoc #ariaoc: Alec #ariaoc: Ray #angst #uuuuhhhhhhh how do you tag this thing. nothing triggering in it??? i think? other than angst it aint that heavy #well theres smoking so ig i should tag that one then???? its been waaay too long since i did smth like this #tw smoking #also also to have a lil more context bout whats happening here. basically this is set in an au where the alec here #belonged in a world that ''collapsed'' like some doomsday thing. Stuff happened and everyone he loved is practically dead #hes one of the survivors. he gained some regeneration/self healing from the Event. a lot of things changed and hes desperate #to cling onto anything that Didnt change. a constant to find comfort in. and thats his will to live despite *gestures vaguely* everything #anyway when he reached his limit he was just thinkin of going into a forest to walk. to be lost. or just anything #but theeen he fell through a portal (i call em stray portals in my universe. they pop up randomly) that appeared below him #That portal led him to This world! where everything is alright. no world ending event happened. everyone is alive. except #for one thing... the alec in this world is dead. and his family were still in the process of moving on from it when suddenly #this Guy appeared that looked Very much so identical to alec so Things happened. and theyre all in the process of healing #alec is healing from the Event. the others are healing from their alec's death and all of em are relearning to love #alec is relearning to love these ppl that are his family yet not at the same time. his family is learning to love and give space to #this alec without seemingly replacing their own alec that had died. its a pretty delicate process of healing from grief

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bmpmp3 · 3 months

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ive been having a lot of fun incorporating embroidery onto paper drawings in school recently (inspired by a printmaking teacher i had once who sometimes stitched her prints, it looked really cool!) but one thing that has kind of been bugging me is how my instructors have been talking about the gendered aspect of it. i know using any form of textile practice in contemporary art is gonna get some kind of thoughts about the historical concept of "women's work" and i dont mind that thats chill thats like normal. its not what, i, the artist, is focusing on personally, but death of the author and all that, as an interpretation its an interesting thing to think about and equally as valid as my intention. also a good topic for essays and such

BUT today my instructor tried to convince me that i can embroider directly on printer paper instead of the thicker papers ive been using and i was like ABSOLUTELY NOT maybe YOU can but I have BIG CLUMSY SWEATY HOT MITTEN HANDS and i Destroy printer paper by looking at it funny. the second a photocopy reaches my skin its already wrinkled. gloves dont help my sweat is too powerful. im CLAMMY leave me ALONE hfkjrwefhjegrfe

and there is an unconcious bias ive been noticing of a lot of very progressively minded artists assuming that i can do this shit delicately. listen. embroidery can be a very delicate and masterful skill that people hone over decades. but not everyone who does it is that skilled master. some of us just like to clumsily sew string through stuff so they can feel the texture. and some of us are really sweaty.

#actually the way my class and department faculty in general talk about gender and feminism in art is a little offputting in general recently #the focus on softness and delicateness and stereotypical markers of femininity is chill thats like an interesting thing to think about #lots of things to explore and critique and then embrace as not innate 'womanly' things but as like. human. as women are human #that type of thing. but theres been a lot of simultaneous emphasis among my peers of like this universal womanhood?#woman as the archetype. and woman as something wholly different from anything else. and the universal 'sisterhood'#i dunno im like fat mixed race kinda gnc and more visibly disabled than i think i am so i was like #never gonna be fully brought into that supposed 'universal sisterhood' anyway #and whether i personally think of myself as a woman or not in general is nobodys business least of all my own #BUT it is bizarre - this universal womanhood narrative. i think exploring one's own femininity is extremely interesting.#is it soft? is it hard? something else? all kinds of ways to think about it #i think the pitfall im falling in with my peers is the habit of assuming you need to make art as a universal message: theres no such thing #any 'universal message' you make will always exclude people you dont mean to exclude #if you depict your universal womanhood as young and soft and skinny and feminine and nuturing - then i might wonder #about the women who are outside of that. what about that fat masc 60 year old woman who cant nuture for shit #(gets so hard i get naseous. i think i hauve covid) i dunno its on my mind a lot #maybe thats just the way things go even in art spaces that are trying to be progressive? always a type of woman who is in vogue #a type of woman who is considered the default? and whoevers outside of that is left out of the conversation entirely #(<- bmpmp3 discovering the basics of misogyny live in the tags of this tumblr post LOL but yknow what i mean)

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tamahoshio · 9 months

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ive been fucking with an au of a slice of my main/fave OC's life (bcause he must bear the most torture i guess lmao) and like i'm so tempted to make it canon bc it explains so well the time right after it, as well as a few things in general, but i also absolutely don't because it's like sensitive material and i dont wanna have to tell people besides myself about it bc despite research personal experiences and all i know it's a kind of thing where i'm probably just not the person anyone would want to even mention some of it? complicated feels in tags?

#it isnt anything particularly offensive or gross i dont think #like of course my snippy ass oc who is going through shit is gonna be a little shitty out of stress for a moment #but not in an obia or ism way #now that it is buried ill tell you #so local young man has cancer scare which turns into pregnancy scare which turns out to be a miscarriage for various reasons due to #some complications with his reproductive system and this whole ordeal is how he finds out hes a type of intersex #while nearing the end of his pre-med program and bc of the stress and need for time to go to all of the necessary doctors he took a semeste #off that he absolutely did not want to #and this mixed with pressure from both school and his part time job #as well as complicated feelings about sex and gender which he kinda thought he already reconciled but bc of all thats happened is reevaluat #and while he comes to a similar conclusion you know the process of all this is a lot to take in #and our boy spirals for a relatively short time only like a year or something before he decides to go home to spend time with family and ge #himself together and see old friends and remember why he wanted to get a good education and why he wants to help people in the first place #he ends up letting himself fall back in love with his fiance after pushing him away and the time apart has really let them both take seriou #looks at who they are and how they feel about really important adult things that werent really on their minds when they first got together #in middle school and now having gone through the series of events before them and having the time to get to know themselves has been #eye opening and they get to build their relationship from a more mutually free place #now theres a lot here i know and some of it is delicate and complicated since things manifest in lots of ways #i come at it from a place of respect and honesty #i myself only have a hormone disorder imbalance thing that causes a bunch of repro garbage #and of course ive known people who experienced some of the other things and ive researched things though even in writing #i dont think i aim to educate but to communicate how characters experience life?#and when it comes to the gender stuff ill admit hes kindof similar to me with how regardless of how i feel irt interests or what role id #play in xyz relationships i feel like im a cis woman so its not a big deal to me but ive put a lot fo thought and reading and talking into #myself and so thats where despite everything he still identifies as a man comes from #i know its probably dumb of me to write any of this

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visenyaism · 5 days

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jaehaerys administration dashboard simulator

🫧maidenpooled Follow

listen i know all kingsguard are bastards but jonquil darke put a cigarette out on me. i think i huave shivers

♟️redwhine

ok bootlicker. you know what she did

🫧maidenpooled Follow

boots not the only thing id lick

🌸queencrowned Follow

this could literally be me and my brother if it weren't for my bitch mom trying to send me to the other side of the fucking continent

🍒saerious

GIRL STAND UP

🤎bowlofbrown

doctrine of exceptionalism meatriders when someone asks them why 75% of dragonstone is blonde and me and half of flea bottom have gleaming amethyst eyes and/or beautiful delicate cheekbones

🥀maegorwife Follow

that's different...targaryens are literally divinely ordained by the seven to rule because they're stronger and better than us...that's why they have the dragons it is in their sanctified valyrian blood

🩸knifeinthedark

SO TRUE...THEY WANT TO ABOLISH THE RIGHT TO FIRST NIGHT BECAUSE OF WOKE. AND YET THEY STILL DO IT. BUT NO ONE CAN SAY ANYTHING ANYMORE OR THOSE GENDER-NEUTRAL DRAGONS WILL BURN YOUR KEEP DOWN

🤎bowlofbrown

cannot stand this fucking website. spending my last silver stag on tyroshi blue hair dye im not going to be associated with you people.

🍒saerious

oh so when maegor has seven wives he’s “aegon’s true son” and “cool” but when i have three boyfriends suddenly im a “whore”

🫀lustywench Follow

op i support you but they did call him “the cruel” for that it was a very important part of the story that he was in fact maegor “the cruel”

🌟sevenpointedstar

🌗maidensgrace

doing all of this with a FAITH OF THE SEVEN URL...girl you better pick a hell and start hoping

#bring back the faith militant

❄️theythemderly

hey isn’t it weird that so many of the king’s children have suddenly and mysteriously died lately. under the care of the maesters. what if they’re planning something…,

🕯️glasscandled

ugh i wish🙄 speed that shit up fr

🥵ullerscorpion

likes charge reblog cast

😈themarcherrrrrr-deactivated5699

me when im in a being dead combination and my opponents are jaehaerys' whole army of childraeyn of the corn

🙌fleabottomtop

yoooooooo theyre quarrelling again.

🙌fleabottomtop

alysanne targaryen if you're reading this i could change your life just give me one chance let me hit

🙌fleabottomtop

there are gold cloaks outside of my house

⚔️errantmaid Follow

kingsguard dick is good as fuck when you don't have a motherfucker in your ear saying it violates a sacred vow made in the eyes of the king and the seven😜

⚔️errantmaid Follow

the king chopped it off and sent him to the wall i fucking hate this place can't have SHIT in king's landing

🏵️floriansjonquil

hey has anyone seen princess gael. it's been literal months and she seems to have up and disappeared with no official announcement from the palace? would be the third female relative to go missing in the king's custody after aerea and saera....

🐝beeeeeeeeeeeeesbury Follow

damn that's crazy. im sure shes fine though anyways i'm a big fan of this new road the king built theres a lot of nice new roads does anyone else like the roads

🐦‍⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow

day 18262 of not fighting the brackens. this is boring as fuckkkkk what am i supposed to do. pretend to care about the triarchy?

🐎brackennation

kill yourself

🐦‍⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow

192.158.1.38. doxxed. get your dumbfuck horse breeder knights ready because our strongest and noblest raven warriors are on the way to your nasty ass keep right now bitch

#asoiaf #valyrianscrolls #imaginary tumblr user fleabottomtop is canon. and a time traveller. btw

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luminesnake · 2 years

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rough sketch of hollow doing ballet!

#ramble incoming in the tags:#I've started associating Hollow with ballet lately for a lot of reasons #the main one being that ballet is an art that's very tranquil and beautiful and ballerinas are thought of as delicate when it takes so much #strength and work to be able to do any of it. and ballerinas are insanely strong #and i think that works really well especially with the common fanon interpretation of Hollow #yknow with the whole delicate image actually incredibly strong thing #and with the fact that if you want to be really good at ballet you're supposed to start taking classes really really young and you have to #be training all the time? idk i feel like theres something here #or maybe i've just been watching too much Princess Tutu #hopefully this made sense

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strangesem · 1 year

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hihi!!

if you’re still taking requests.. can you do a Hobie x fem!reader 😟‼️❓

Can Hobie be really close friends, and the reader has a fat crush on him. Like following him like a lost puppy, doing sweet things for him typa crush.

And like, one day she goes over to his place and he’s all injured and in his Spider Suit, and she like freaks out?

THIS IS SO CUTE RAHHHHH

apologies to everyone who’s request I haven’t gotten to yet; this ended up being a pretty long one because I just couldn’t stop writing lol

hobie brown x reader (reader finding hobie injured)

a/n: I changed it just a little bit and made reader and hobie roommates lol (as I’ve said previously I see hobie as 19-ish)

ps I need more spider-punk gifs theres like 3 total

so you and hobie have been best friends since you were kids

and you’ve been crushing on him since you were like 14-

and when you got your own place, it was only natural to share that with hobie

because of his struggle with being unhoused, he spent a lot of time at your place, so it wasn’t much of a change anyway

and sure the apartment was a little small, and not in the greatest neighborhood, but it was home

or at least you thought so

as hobie started coming come later and later, you became unsure if he felt the same

even worse he consistently came home with bruises/marks littering his face and arms, and you’re sure if you could see the rest of his body it would be the same

he’d always hound you for being out late because of the type of people who hung around this part of town at night, but if you even try to ask him to be more safe? he i just shrugs it off.

“it’s different” or so he claims, but you fail to see how.

not to mention that, as far as you could tell, he didn’t even have a reason to be out so late.

and as his late nights bleed into early mornings, you eventually stop being able to stay up waiting for him every night, and that worries you even more;

what if he just doesn’t come back one day? and you wouldn’t even know until the next morning!!

but your school/work responsibilities, as irrelevant as they may seem compared to your concern for your best friend, necessitated you having a full nights rest

but tonight? you can’t sleep.

hobie had promised you he’d be home in time to watch the new horror movie you’d rented. and yet, he never showed.

you had actually gone to bed early, exhausted and knowing sitting on the couch waiting would only breed more anxiety as each hour passed; but you hadn’t slept

you couldn’t. not tonight.

and so, you decide to just get up and have something warm to drink; maybe that would help soothe you

you lazily drag yourself to the kitchen, spend a few moments debating between tea and cocoa, before delicately mixing together your drink of choice

it’s then that you realize you had apparently left the tv on? the volume is off but there’s clearly light coming from your living room

so, you quietly enter the living room to grab the remote to turn it off; only to see a body laying across the small couch you had recently bought, causing you to jump

“jesus christ hobie what the fuck- WHAT THE FUCK HOBIE”

you quickly notice the crimson blood dripping from his deep looking wounds, seeping into his clothes- wait no. spider-man’s suit???

one thing at a time y/n.

“‘m sorry, just kinda crashed here” his voice is hoarse as he grabs your hand and squeezes it in some weird plea to keep himself grounded

“OHMYGODHOBIEAREYOUOKAYWHATHAPPENEDISTHISWHYYOUREALWAYSOUTSOLATEWHYDIDNTYOUTELLMEYOUREBLEEDINGLIKEALOTSHOULDNTWEBEDOINGSOMETHINGABOUTTHAT”

translation: omg hobie are you okay?? what happened- is this why you’re always out so late?? you’re bleeding like a lot shouldn’t we be doing something about that?????

you quickly stammer out before running to grab all the first aid supplies you had in the bathroom and heading back to a way too unbothered hobie

“calm down I’ve had worse”

“YOU’VE WHA-

“calm down.” he grabs you by the shoulders and makes you look him in the eye “I’m fine”

“people who are fine don’t bleed this much, hobie.” you began working on the worst looking wound, applying pressure with a cloth to hopefully stop the bleeding “why didn’t you tell me?”

“y’ worry too much; especially ‘bout me”

“of course I do! you’re my best friend.”

“we both know it’s more than that, love”

you freeze; you can’t look at him. you’re too embarrassed to let yourself admit that he’s right, because you had always been just friends. and you were terrified of ruining that.

“I’m sorry”

“look at me, y/n”

you can’t.

“feelings mutual y’know, if that’s what’s got ya all worked up” he laughs, shoving your shoulder a little in an effort to diffuse the tension you had built up within yourself “always has been; thought I made it pretty obvious. you always were pretty oblivious though”

“no I’m not!” he smiles; you always were defensive too

“pretty sure y’a are”

“I will literally let you sit here and bleed out”

“no you won’t”

no, you won’t.

you just go back to addressing his wounds, trying not to feel all giddy inside, but also doing your best not to overflow with anxiety.

what are you guys then? this changes EVERYTHING- is it weird that you live together now? is it weird-

“you’re worrying again. and don’t try to tell me you’re not; I know that face”

“it’s nothing. anyway, I’m all done; we should change the bandages in a few hours though, just to keep everything clean”

you get up to go wash your hands, and maybe heat up your long-forgotten drink, but you’re interrupted by hobie’s audible sigh

“you’re forgetting something, love”

“I am?? did I miss somewhere?” your voice gets progressively higher as you check him over, worry bubbling within you

“y’ did, yeah”

he pulls you closer to him, briefly cradling your face before allowing his lips to brush against yours

“stay? f’ me?”

#not proofread #hobie brown x reader #hobie brown #hobie brown x you #spider punk x reader #spider punk #across the spiderverse #marvel

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catmask · 5 months

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Do you have any advice for continuing to use your planner once you start? I'm going to be starting one for the first time soon, but I worry I'll have issues sticking to it even if it helps.

it might not be the advice you want, but if your planner doesnt 'stick' theres usually a few reasons (at least that ive found) as to why-

the planner doesnt actually help you remember the things youre supposed to. i prefer very specific, small lists (so i like having food, work tasks, exercise/self care and chores separate) where a lot of planners ive found just give you one big block for the day. when i used those, i would manually separate the lists, usually run out of space, and then give up and not maintain using it.

its not convenient to use! either the size is too clunky, the pages are not pleasant to write on/bleed and become illegible, or - what ive found happens to people a LOT - they focus on making their planner so pretty they take forever to actually write stuff down. your planner is supposed to be a tool to help you, so taking care of it is important, but for functionality sake... it ISNT supposed to be a journal. you dont have to treat it so delicately youre afraid to make mistakes or write too sloppily

when are you planning/writing in it? i write one or two important tasks for the next day as im going to bed, and then add the rest the morning after when i see how im feeling. this makes it so im not using my phone right when i wake up or before i go to bed too, which ive found puts me in a lot better/productive of a mood...

theres more reasons, but ultimately it comes down to 'is it convenient?' 'is it pleasant?'. trying to form habits you resist naturally is much more difficult than trying to find things that are small adjustments, if you try to change everything about yourself all at once, you'll very likely just fall flat! if the planner you have now isnt working... you might just need to be pickier about which one you get. the one i have now was 5 dollars, but i got it because it had the kind of formatting i was specifically looking for.

#long post #mailbox

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ladyloveandjustice · 1 month

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When I checked to tag to confirm his favorite food that in the tag I see people arguing "Shuro's not a misogynist!!! He's not sexist!!! he said he loves Falin's mind!!!" and guys. he's sexist. That doesn't mean you can't like him or anything, or that he's irredeemable, I wouldn't call him a misogynist as in "he hates women", but:

"ORDINARY WOMEN HATE BUGS AND THINK THEY'RE GROSS AND ICKY AND SCREAM...YET FALIN LOVES BUGS? THE SPECIALEST GIRL IN THE UNIVERSE!" #notlikeothergirls

(very funny to say it about a caterpillar too, since those are not bugs people are most commonly scared of or disgusted by compared to other ones)

He again shows a kind of condescending sexism even in post-series comics:

Pretty rich for a guy with an all female group of bodyguards! He's talking to someone who's very capable of defending herself. It's a weird cognitive dissonance he has here, one that's not really shown by other people in the manga! One thing that's cool about Dunmeshi is there's really not much "women are like this, men at like this, women have to be protected" language and women are casually treated in a fairly equal manner...except when Shuro is talking. It's pretty clearly a deliberate thing.

On top of that, he really did make Falin his manic pixie dream girl, and that's undeniable. He says he likes her mind and that's great, but in reality he barely knows her and his view of her is very founded the ideal he's built her into. First of all, he doesn't really seem to accept Laios would be part of his life if they got married, because he seems to assume Falin would leave him and everything she cares about behind, which she definitely wouldn't have done at this point in her life. Nor does he tell the two most important people to her about his plan to rescue her. He does a lot of things we know Falin wouldn't care for in her name. I think he matures a bit over the course of the manga, but I don't think he sees her actual quirks and flaws (which he might find annoying) the way Laios and Marcille do.

I've seen people excusing this with "he's repressed/ he's Japanese" which uuuuh. Not a great look to say we can't expect a Japanese man to be as "enlightened" as their European friends. Again, Shuro has grown up with a ton of women around. His indirect nature and issues with his childhood might be why he keeps his distance from them, but odds are one of the ninja girls doesn't mind bugs, or another one of his allies in the dungeon world. He did grow up in a fairly patiarchal household, but he is surrounded by women he could get to know, and very capable female fighters both in his adventurers party and his homelife. So theres no excuse for him to treat Falin as delicate or put her on a pedestal compared to his assumptions about other women.

Again. this doesn't make him irredeemable. I'd call it subconcious sexism rather than actively hating women, a thin line sometimes, but significant in the likelihood of capacity to change. I feel like if someone pointed it out to him he'd at least give it some thought or maybe try to reconcile with it. But excusing the flaw doesn't do anything for his character. Just because you like him doesn't mean he doesn't have issues.

#dungeon meshi

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bandgie · 2 months

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hyunjin being a cafe owner and getting obsessed with a customer over time, flirting and all. one night he sees his favorite customer looking through the window of the cafe late at night, most possibly drunk. he'd already closed the place but he can surely fix something up for the special one~

he does. and since you're touchy friendly with him, he goes along. holding you up since you have a hard time walking, sitting with you while you eat, keeping his hand on your back, acting even sweeter than he normally does. when you tell him you're tired, he offers to take you to his place. when you're there, he helps you sober up a little. then when you get up to leave, he reaches for your hand, pulls you to sit on his lap and the rest is pretty obvious.

so sorry but this is slowburn material!!! hyunjin is such a lover boy, the thought of fucking someone he likes for the first time neeeeddsss to be intimate. to be full of love and complete adoration

but I mean...that doesn't mean he won't do other things...

ending up at his place cuz you drank a little one-to-many glasses at his cafe event Wine & Dye is super embarrassing on your end. you sober up when he gets you water at his place and whips up a dish that supposedly helps with hangovers too.

you're apologizing profusely, the taste of wine still on your tongue as you wobble to stand and leave.

"how are you gonna get home?" he cocks his pretty head to the side with an even prettier smile. "I drove us here."

oh, right. maybe you should ask him to drive you home. but when his large hands take ahold of your wrist to guide you back to the couch where he's got snacks prepared makes you second guess. he's sweet, you learn. a lot more than just the handsome cafe owner you've thought him to be. he loves dogs, is allergic to cats, loves quiet, calming atmospheres, and is amazing at art.

you're pretty much sober by the time you've finished the snacks, but you find yourself wanting to stay. everything about him is so inviting, down to the way his eyes smile to the canvases littering the living room. when you ask to stay, just for the night, he lights up. gleaming with acceptance when he happily sits you on his lap, telling you that you can stay for as long as you like

maybe it's because the wine had made you a little hot, but you like how he feels under you. knotting his hair in your fingers while telling him thank you, that he's so kind and sweet.

doesn't take long before you get to feel his lips. how plush and warm they are against your own. his hands are on your waist, slowly grinding you on his lap. whimpering into his mouth because it just feel so good to ride him like this. feeling his erection on your cunt despite the many layers between you.

and when you tug on his hair, he whines. opening his mouth for you to greet his tongue with your own. you can taste the sweetness of chocolate with a hint of mint. he grunts, you moan. your hips pick up their own pace and as good as it would feel for him to be inside you, theres just something so delicate about dry humping him like this.

it's pretty hard for him to finish by grinding against you like this, but hyunjin would be damned in you got off his lap. it's too good to watch you chase your high. to pull away from the kiss to moan into his neck, sucking the skin there. and when you do cum, shaking and trembling in his embrace, hyunjin doesn't stop moving his thigh against your core.

#stray kids #stray kids smut #hyunjin!#hyunjin #hyunjin hwang

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sturnish · 2 months

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౨ৎ Project Partners ౨ৎ || ⋆౨ৎ˚ Nate Version ⋆౨ৎ˚ || Series Masterlist ||

ᡣ𐭩 | Warnings - Smut, theres like a lot of kinky shit

ᡣ𐭩 | Summary - Nate and Y/n get partnered together for a project, they chose to do it at the empty library.

Disclaimer - this one is a bit longer( 3,300 words) with a lot of buildup, good smut tho

Y/n sat in her homeroom, rolling her eyes at the way Nate was laughing so obnoxiously with his friends. He always had to be the center of attention, the one everyone looked up to. She didn't understand why he bothered. She preferred to keep to herself and not draw attention. Her long, wavy auburn hair fell over one shoulder, framing her delicate features. She wore her usual ensemble; a short pink dress, white ankle socks, and a pair of black Mary Jane shoes.

She glanced down at her schedule and sighed when she saw that she had been partnered with Nate for a project. They were supposed to meet at the library after school. Great. Just what she needed. As class came to an end, she quickly gathered her things and made her way to her locker.

Once she had her things, she made her way out of the school and towards the library. It was a quiet, peaceful place, unlike the chaos that was the school. The library was practically empty, save for a few stragglers doing homework or studying. She walked over to a table near the window and sat down, waiting for Nate to arrive.

A few minutes later, the familiar obnoxious laughter echoed through the library. Nate stormed in, his brown hair a mess and his clothes disheveled. He immediately spotted her and rolled his eyes before making his way over to the table. "Great," he muttered as he sat down across from her. "I get stuck with the cutesy little princess. Figures."

Y/n ignored his comment and opened her mouth to speak. "So, Nate," she began, trying to sound as professional as possible, "what did you have in mind for our project?"

Nate leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. "Well, I was thinking we could do some research on the history of this place." He smiled at her, revealing a set of straight, white teeth. "That way, we can impress our teacher and get an A." Y/n couldn't help but feel a shiver run down her spine at his smile. It wasn't exactly warm and inviting.

"Sounds like a plan," she replied, trying to ignore the uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. "What do you want to do first?"

"Well," he said, leaning in closer to her, "since we're here at the library, why don't we start by looking up some books?" He gestured towards the bookshelves behind him. "I'm sure we'll find something interesting."

Y/n nodded and stood up, following him over to the bookshelves. She began to search for a book on the history of the library while Nate browsed through the stacks nearby. After a few minutes of searching, she finally found a promising book and brought it over to the table. Nate glanced at it and smiled.

"Good choice," he said, reaching out to take the book from her. "Now, why don't you sit back down and I'll start looking through it?" Y/n felt a strange mixture of relief and annoyance at his tone. She didn't like the way he was ordering her around, but she supposed they were supposed to be working together.

Sighing inwardly, she sat down again and waited for him to begin. Nate opened the book and began to skim through it, muttering to himself as he read. After a few minutes, he looked up at her and smirked. "So, how's your life, princess?" he asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Y/n bit her lip, trying to ignore the barb. "It's fine," she replied, forcing a smile. "And you can call me Y/n."

"Oh, really?" he drawled. "And why would I want to do that?"

She glared at him for a moment before looking away, feeling her cheeks flush with anger and embarrassment. "I don't know," she muttered. "Maybe because it's my name?"

Nate laughed, the sound grating on her nerves. "Oh, please," he scoffed. "You think you're so special just because you're all cute and innocent. Well, let me tell you something, sweetheart." He leaned in close, his breath hot against her ear. "No one here cares about how cute you are."

Y/n felt a shiver run down her spine at his words. They stung worse than she expected. She wanted to argue, to defend herself, but she couldn't find the words. Instead, she just sat there, feeling small and helpless.

Nate seemed to notice the effect his words had on her and smirked. "There we go," he said, sitting back in his chair. "That's the expression I was looking for."

"oh shut up" she replies and rolls her eyes, reaching over his lap to grab the book. "let's get back to work, shall we?" she asks, trying to keep her voice steady.

Nate grinned at her, his teeth white against his tanned skin. "Oh, all right," he says, giving her a mocking bow. "Your highness has spoken."

Y/n gritted her teeth, feeling the urge to punch him in the arm grow stronger with each passing second. She ignored it, focusing instead on the book in front of her. They worked in silence for a while, each of them absorbed in their own thoughts and the information they were reading.

after an hour or two, y/n stretches a bit, tying her hair up and removing her sweater to get a bit more comfortable

Nate glanced up from his reading, his gaze lingering on her exposed skin for a moment too long. "Hot enough for you, princess?" he asked, trying to sound casual. Y/n rolled her eyes at the question "Like actually, shut up." she says, glaring at Nate

He chuckled, shaking his head. "Oh, you're so cute when you're annoyed," he teased. "You're really annoying." she says, getting up with her book to lay stomach down on the carpet behind him. "And you're really full of yourself," she muttered under her breath. Nate ignored her and continued to read, his gaze occasionally flicking over to her as she laid there.

"wait, can't we use this?" she says, signaling for him to come read a page in her book

Nate sighed, setting his own book aside and walking over to her. "Fine," he said, squatting down beside her. "What do you need me to see?" She pointed to a particular section of the page, and he glanced down at it, his expression unreadable. "alright, put that in."

he stands up, glancing at her ass, and then down at the book again. "That's what I thought," he said, nodding. "Good job, princess."

Y/n felt her cheeks heat up again. She turned away, pretending to study another section of the book. "Thanks," she muttered. Nate laughed and walked back over to his chair, sitting down with a satisfied smile on his face.

"You know," he began, "for someone who's supposed to be all innocent and whatever, you can be pretty sarcastic when you want to be."

"And for someone who's supposed to be all tough and whatever, you sure are a big baby," she shot back.

"its funny how you're saying all this while you're dressed like that." he scoffs "you should really shut the fuck up" she says, standing up.

"Or what?" he challenged with a smirk. "You'll what? Cry? I didn't think so."

Y/n's blood boiled. "Picking on girls isn't gonna make your dick any bigger."

Nate smirked "You know what, princess?" he said, leaning forward in his chair, "i don't need to worry about that, im good in size and shape."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. You're such a jerk."

"You know what, maybe I am," he agreed with a shrug. "But at least I'm not some stuck-up little brat who thinks she's better than everyone else just because she's cute."

"i do not think I'm better than everybody else!" she says, moving towards him.

"Then why do you act like you are?" he challenged. "Why do you think you can just say whatever you want and no one will ever stand up to you?"

"fuck off, you're an arrogant little shit who doesn't know one thing about m-"

Before she could finish, he leaned forward, his face inches from hers. "I know exactly what kind of person you are, princess," he growled. "And I'm not afraid to say it."

Y/n's heart was pounding, but she forced herself to hold her ground. "And what exactly do you know about me?" she hissed back.

Nate grinned, his eyes boring into hers. "I know you're just as much of a jerk as I am," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "And I know that deep down, you like it."

The words hit her like a punch to the gut. She couldn't believe he would say something like that. "You're disgusting," she managed to choke out.

"and you like it, prancing around, trying so hard to impress me. honestly i expected better, but once a slut, always a slut,"he retorts

"You're such a fucking pig!" she spat. "I'm not like that!"

"Then why are you acting like it now?" he asked, leaning back in his chair and folding his arms over his chest. "Why do you keep coming back for more?"

She couldn't believe he would say that. "i fucking hate you" she says, walking into the back room of the library to finish some of the project. Nate follows her.

"somebody needs to teach you a lesson" he says, walking up behind her. "You keep pushing me like this, im gonna fuck the attitude out of you."

"W-what?"

Nate grabbed her shoulders, spinning her around to face him. His eyes were wild, his nostrils flaring. "You heard me," he growled. "You keep playing these games, you keep pushing me, and I'm going to make you regret it."

Y/n's heart hammered in her chest as he held her, as his breath fanned across her face. She couldn't believe he was actually serious. "You wouldn't dare," she whispered.

His grip on her shoulders tightened, and his expression darkened even further. "Oh, princess," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "I dare."

"you fucking won't, you're pathetic" she says.

Nate just laughed, a cruel, mocking sound. "We'll see about that," he said, and then he leaned in, kissing her.

A small moan slips through her lips into the kiss. His tongue tracing against hers, and his hands grip her hips, pulling her closer. She can't believe she's letting him do this, but she can't seem to help herself. It's like there's a switch inside of her that's been flipped, and now all she wants is more of him.

He pulls away, breathing heavily, and looks down at her. "See?" he says, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. "You're not so innocent after all."

"shut up" she says, her voice barely more than a whisper. "You're just as bad as I am."

"Maybe we're perfect for each other," he muses, kissing her again.

"You're pathetic."

"And you like it." He says between kisses.

"No," she whispers, but her body betrays her. It feels so good, so right, to be wanted like this. To be desired.

Nate pulls away, looking into her eyes. "I think you're starting to believe it," he says, a knowing smile curving his lips. "And I think you're starting to like it."

"I don't…" she starts to protest, but the words trail off as he kisses her again, his hands sliding up her back, cupping her breasts through her shirt.

Her head swims, and she can feel herself giving in to the heat building between them. "Nate…" she breathes out, arching into his touch.

"That's it, baby," he whispers against her lips. "Let go."

And as they kiss, she does. She lets go of everything - her pride, her innocence, her attitude - and gives in to the passion that's been building between them. She's not sure how much longer she can resist him, or if she even wants to.

Their kisses grow deeper, more urgent, as his hands wander lower, pushing up her shirt and cupping her bare skin. She gasps when she feels his fingers brush against her nipple, hardening beneath his touch. He groans into the kiss, and she can feel his erection pressing against her through his pants.

She unbuttons his shirt, revealing the defined muscles of his chest, and he groans again as she explores his skin with her hands. He's bigger than she expected, and she can't help but feel a thrill of anticipation as she thinks about what it would be like to have him inside of her.

Their kisses grow even more intense, their tongues tangling together as they both struggle for air. Nate's hands slide down her back, over her ass, gripping her through her pants. She arches her back, pressing against him, and he growls in response, his hips moving in a rough rhythm against her.

Her head spins with desire, and she can feel herself getting closer and closer to the edge. "Nate," she moans, "I want you."

He pulls back, looking into her eyes, and she can see the lust burning bright in his gaze. "You're so fucking beautiful," he whispers before lowering his head, kissing her neck, her collarbone. His hands slide under her shirt, cupping her breasts, and he groans as he feels her nipples harden beneath his touch.

She grips his shoulders, digging her nails into his skin as he continues to kiss and touch her, moving lower still. His hands slide down her stomach, pushing her pants and underwear down her hips, and she gasps when she feels his fingers against her folds.

"Fuck, you're wet," he breathes, his voice husky with desire. "So fucking wet for me."

Her hips arch off the floor as he slips a finger inside of her, finding her entrance slick with arousal. She moans, her head falling back against the wall as he begins to stroke her in a gentle, teasing rhythm.

"Nate…" she whimpers, feeling the pressure building inside of her. "I need…"

He looks up at her, his eyes dark and hungry. "Tell me what you need," he says, his voice rough with desire.

"I need you," she whispers, her voice barely audible. "Please."

He smiles, and then slides his fingers deeper inside of her, finding her clit and circling it gently. She gasps, arching her back, her nails digging into his shoulders. "That's it, baby," he whispers. "Let go."

And with that, she does. Her body explodes in a wave of pleasure, her muscles tensing and relaxing as she cries out his name.

She clings to him, her body still trembling from the intensity of the sensations coursing through her.

"Get on your knees." His voice is rough and urgent.

She does as he says, lowering herself down until she's kneeling before him. He pulls his pants and boxers down, freeing his erection, and she looks up at him, her heart pounding in anticipation.

"Are you ready for this?" he asks, his voice low and gruff. "open your mouth"

She opens her mouth, feeling her lips part as she stares up at him. His eyes darken as he watches her, and then he groans, pushing forward, guiding his cock into her mouth. She gags on the thickness of it, feeling it stretch her lips and touch the back of her throat. He grunts, his hips moving as he begins to thrust into her mouth, fucking her face.

She sucks and licks, trying to take as much of him as she can, her hands gripping his hips for leverage.

"That's it, baby," he growls, his voice strained. "Take it all."

And she does. She takes every inch of him into her mouth, her throat, her body, until she feels him tense and shudder against her lips. His hot seed spills down her throat, and she swallows, feeling it slide down her throat as he continues to thrust into her mouth.

At last, he pulls away, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he stares down at her. "Fuck," he whispers, his eyes dark with desire. "You're unbelievable."

She looks up at him, her chest heaving with exertion, and she feels a thrill of pride run through her.

He pulls her up and spins her so her back is facing him.

"pass me my tie, baby."

She reaches around, feeling for the tie he wears, and then hands it to him. He takes it, his movements are quick and efficient, then he wraps and ties her hands behind her back.

"Are you gonna be able to be a good girl and keep quiet?"

She nods, her heart racing with anticipation. "I'll be quiet."

He smirks, and then reaches around to unbutton her shirt. "That's my good girl."

he turns her so her back is to him and bends her over. "ima fuck this tight pussy."

And with that, he pushes inside of her, filling her up and making her moan. he spanks her and stops moving. "i said no noises baby. Do you understand?" he says, yanking her hair back.

She nods, biting her lip to keep quiet.

"Good girl." He says before beginning to thrust into her again, his hips slamming against her ass. Her back arches as she feels the sensation of being filled and taken. She tries to concentrate on the pleasure, but the sting of the spankings mixes in, making the sensation both exquisite and painful.

"You feel so good," he groans, his breath hot against her neck. "God, you're making me lose it."

She moans, unable to help herself as he pushes her closer and closer to the edge. "Please…" she whispers. "I'm close…"

he slows his thrust down, killing her pleasure. "I said," he spanks her, "No fucking noises." he reaches down and grabs her panties, shoving them in her mouth to keep her quiet.

Then, he starts to move faster, harder, his thrusts deep and powerful. "Fuck, you feel so good," he growls. "Come for me, baby."

And with those words, she does. Her body shudders with the force of her orgasm, her muscles tightening around him as she cries out into her makeshift gag. He follows her over the edge, groaning her name as he comes, filling her up. he unties her hand from behind her back and ties them above her head.

"you want more, baby?"

She nods, her eyes shining with desire.

He grins, then leans in and kisses her neck. "I've got just the thing for you."

He pushes her forward, onto her hands and knees, and then positions himself behind her. His cock slides easily inside her again, and he begins to move, fucking her hard and fast.

"You're mine," he growls. "You always will be."

She moans, arching her back as he takes her roughly, claiming her body and her pleasure. This time, he lets her make as much noise as she wants, and she cries out his name over and over again, lost in the intensity of their lovemaking.

He thrusts into her, his hips slamming against her ass, her body shaking with each impact. The air fills with the sounds of their breathless gasps and the slapping of their bodies together.

He grabs her hair, pulling her back, and then thrusts deeper, harder, his cock hitting her sweet spot again and again. She comes around him, her body convulsing with pleasure, and he follows close behind, groaning her name as he spills himself into her.

He holds her still for a moment, his cock still buried inside her, their bodies joined in a sweaty, satisfied heap on the floor. Then, he pulls out.

"You're amazing," he whispers, kissing her forehead.

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overstayedtime · 6 months

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cattonquick headcanons because saltburn is just rotting my brain to nothing

• ollie has a thing for felix when he goes on his runs because felix being felix does his runs around the estate with his shirt off and in the shortest shorts known to man

• they take baths together & wash each others hair because theyre sappy and gay and just down really bad respectively (but only sappy with each other)

• in the summer theyll sit on the same sunbed together, oliver lying inbetween felix’s legs while felix plays with the shorter boys hair

• oliver revels in felix wearing those linen shirts, when the sun hits & he can see the outline of his boyfriends body through the shirt is enough to make him weak at the knees

• felix is golden retriever boyfriend and oliver is black cat boyfriend

• i said in my last cattonquick hc post that felix would call oliver petnames BUT i forgot the best one // felix calls oliver doll because hes just so delicate and beautiful that hes felix’s own little baby doll

• whenever theyre (oliver) in the library studying, felix is constantly pestering oliver because he wants attention and they inevitably get kicked out because of their too-loud bickering

• theres also a time that felix & oliver got caught definitely not reading books in the little back corner of the library which resulted in them getting in a LOT of trouble (it was worth it)

im rly tempted to write fanfics including some of these UGH i just love them so so much

#barry keoghan #emerald fennell #felix catton #jacob elordi #oliver quick #saltburn #cattonquick #headcanon #saltburn but theyre boyfriends #lgbtq #saltburn headcanons #the brainrot is real #i just love the gays #i love them so bad #felix is bisexual argue with the wall

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hijackalx · 7 months

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ASTARION NSFW ALPHABET

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

hes such a dick if ur a one night stand LMAO understandably tho. understandably..... but yeah if hes not really feeling u he just kind of dips out after coming up with some wack ass rehearsed excuse to protect ur feelings. totally different story if he loves u though. i feel like he gets sooo lovey-dovey post nut OMG like soo much praise and so many kisses. post nut clarity with his S/O consists of him enjoying the many wonders of the world 😭😭 that shit will have him watching the sunset

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

i think he likes his hands. i mean its one of the things he can see so like. but they are really nice. long and nimble fingers and smooth palms. his hands look like poetry lowkey. anyway if ur AFAB he loves titties. any titty. loves to mark them up and watch them bounce while u ride him. if ur AMAB its ur shoulder/collarbone area especially if its dainty and delicate looking but regardless he wants to bite around there. youll see him looking at them a lot

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he wants to come on ur face or inside u. his two go-tos. if hes about to nut he'll ask u really quick which u want and u have like 3 seconds to answer LMAO. takes a while to get to that point tho so u have some time to think about it beforehand 😭😭

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he got hard asf the first time u let him drink from u LMAOO he walked away and jerked off IMMEDIATELY

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

hundreds of years of experience is enough for me yeah

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

oooooooooooo gurl. ugh hold on theres so many it could be. ok so theres two. 1. he likes to sit u in his lap (the back of ur head on his shoulder or maybe even sitting sideways with ur legs off the side ??? idk however yall want) and finger/jerk u off. it makes him feel sooo in control 🤤 and 2. he lovesss eye contact so any positions where he can stare into ur soul 👁️👁️ yall why am i only seeing missionary rn...... or planking i guess lol

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

i think hes pretty serious. he might even get pissed off if u start acting too goofy lol like hes playful but not going to start cracking jokes 😹😹

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

this pains me to say...... but i dont think elves get body hair if any (like canonically)....... but i think its weird to be completely bald so im going to say hes got a little bit of pubic hair, armpit hair, and of course leg/arm hair. its just not very long or thick. he basically never has to trim or anything

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

my boy is a romantic at heart yall. will kiss u a lot and hold u very close. i think its rlly important for him to have some sort of emotional connection thru sex.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

honestly dont feel like he ever does normally LMAO when u reject him or push him away during the first romance scene and he says he'll go beat off i think hes just saying that to make u feel bad 😹😭 when u let him drink from u it was probably the first time he jerked off in a longggg time. i can see him thinking hes above doing something like that lol so its an ego thing

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

ok did u guys see the little church looking building at the first campsite in act 3??? i think if yall were to smash there he'd never forget it. like something about that turns him on so much. probably bent u over the altar. even after u guys are long gone he still thinks abt it.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

suck on his fingers omg. but also really likes to use sex to put u in ur place so if u guys argue or just dont get along at some point he will use that as a build up to sex. so he will purposely push ur buttons A LOT. cuz its like, how dare u raise ur voice at him ?? 😤

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

if u dont go along with what he wants to do he kind of gets pissy after a while. he only ever really wants to be in control and thats it. also wont do anything extreme or ridiculous either 😭😭 anything that makes him feel humiliated is a big no

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

for AFAB like ive said before he is the self-proclaimed coochie eating champion of faerun. sooooo good at it its not funny. will also kiss it and leave more kisses/bites on ur thighs. makes u feel like ur coochie is the most divine coochie in the world LMAO omg also will want to eat u out every time ur on ur period......... i think thats like one thing he will absolutely beg for OOP

if ur AMAB its basically the same just with a dick lol

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he can do both. probably likes to be a little rougher than most people though

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

yeah if hes in the mood i can see him scouting the area for a place to smash LMAO which probably happens pretty often. doesnt mind giving up the romantic aspect as long as yall still fuck for real every once in a while.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

i think he would need to be convinced. willing to hear u out at least

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

TOO LONG. HE LASTS WAY TOO LONG. i mean after u been suckin and fuckin for that many years how do u not take forever to nut 😭😭 u will get urs tho dont worry. also perfect situation for u to have multiple orgasms so dont get discouraged besties 🤘🏻

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

allllll the timeeeee. he wants u to need him more than anything else before he fucks u. u need to need this man like u need oxygen. like a fish needs water. like a plant needs the sun. like a

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

grunts and groans but when he gets closer to finishing he'll start moaning. he doesnt make an effort to stay quiet but also wont do anything embarrassing 😹

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

emmmmm i wanna say he can go a pretty long time without sex. but if he has a partner he is sexually attracted to his libido can be pretty high. but lets remember he is getting into his erectile dysfunction years ☝🏻 JOKINGGGG LMAO

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

well he meditates technically. but he gets into that lil meditation pose fast as fuck boy 🧘 do not interrupt him either he'll be grumpy 😭

#astarion #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #x reader #headcanons #astarion bg3 #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #my headcanons #astarion ancunin

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agirlwithglam · 3 months

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how to develop self love and confidence

— a step by step guide by yours truly ♥

disclaimer!! for some people it can take a lot longer to love themselves than others, so don't be discouraged if it takes a bit longer. just remember that no matter what you think, you ARE WORTHY OF LOVE.

step 1: identifying the root cause

first you need to find WHY you dont love yourself. it usually comes down to these main reasons:

society

your looks

comparison

your abilities

childhood trauma

your current situations

it can be just one or more than one, and sometimes it may not be as simple as "my looks", sometimes you may have to dig deeper.

for me, it was because i thought i was "ugly"

step 2: once you know the WHY, research about the topic and try and solve it.

here ive broken down the 6 reasons to help you a bit: (but remember that this is just a small break down, if you want you can research more about the topic & try to battle it)

society: society has tricked us into believing that loving yourself is considered 'vain' or 'narcissistic'. let me tell you right now that THAT IS NOT TRUE. loving yourself is a basic necessity that everyone should have!!

your looks: this is something i struggled with for a loong time. remember that beauty is subjective!! bob could think that travis looks 'average' but Leo could think that travis looks absolutely gorgeous!! ☆ so how did i overcome this? i actually 'glowed up'. bc the main thing i didnt like was face- my teeth to be specific. so once i got braces, my teeth aligned and i started looking so much better. ☆ other struggles: ↴ for you if it may be acne, then you could start trying to take care of your skin better. or if its body image then if you reeeeally dont like it then literally just start working out. if you have the option to yet you still dont then dont complain. but remember that ALL BODIES ARE PERFECT. ★ another thing that helped me a lot was affirmations! i listened to a bunch of affirmations -> i used this video by thewizardliz and it did wonders! (you can also search up on yt self-love/ beauty affirmations)

comparison: for most people comparison comes from social media right? the simple solution to this would be unfollow accounts that dont serve you, or delete/ set a time limit on the social media platform "but what if i compare myself to people i meet in real life?" well we can't exactly unfollow or delete these people but what we can do is turn that jealousy (yes, jealousy) into inspiration! be inspired by the people with greater lives and use that to pull yourself forward! ☆ a quote that i read once (that may or may not help you) : "do not compare your chapter 1 to someone else's chapter 50." you never know what the other person has gone through or is going through that got them to this point!

your abilities: okay theres not much i can say here except that you can learn almost everything online nowadays. stop complaining and get off your lazy butt to prove to yourself just how much potential you have! (but don't beat yourself up for being a lazy butt, im one as well) here is a link to a TON of stuff you can learn online!

childhood trauma: this is a bit of a more delicate subject which i do not know a lot on, my best suggestion would be to just go to therapy (or use an online therapy app- betterhelp). - watching thewizardliz may help as well as she might know more about the topic.

your current situation: whether its trouble with friends, at school, at work, or with family i promise you that these things do not last forever. humans were not put on earth to be unhappy and miserable! (whats the point in that?) my advice is to learn more about the topic (for ex i was struggling with being left out w friends for a while and it did hurt a bit) and see what you can do to fix it or at least make the best out of it. + another reminder that you can use the law of assumption- in basic words the law states that whatever you desire, you have. all you need to do is accept that. heres a quote i read: "if you dont like where you are,, then move. you aint a tree." this is literally YOUR life. RESPECT yourself and dont let people treat you bad because that is disrespecting yourself!

step 3: focus on yourself!!

my favourite step!!

this is your sign to stop focussing on others' lives and start focussing on your own.

when you start to focus on yourself, up level yourself and try to become your best version of yourself, you actually end up falling in love with that version of yourself, and your current version!

ask yourself: is there even something to love?

ask yourself: would you want to date or be friends with someone like you? think actually deep about this; if your answer is no, then that obviously means that there is some work to do.

if you're constantly negative and complaining and rude all the time, trust me, literally no ones gonna want to hang out with you. and then you'll adopt that 'victim mindset' of "nobody likes me and i suck". instead of doing that, why dont you try to just suck a bit less? there isn't any pressure on you to become amazing the next day, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.

small things/habits to start:

gratitude

hydration

exercising

journalling

meditation

eating healthy

developing a skill

get enough sleep

take cold showers

taking care of your skin

invest in your appearance

focussing on school/ your grades

go outside! go for walks, be in nature!

changing what you consume (resources below)

some resources that helped me SO MUCH:

♡ thewizardliz

♡ tam kaur

♡ persephone's mind

and meditation! its so extremely underated but SO VALUABLE.

xoxo, vanilla

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carpedzem · 3 months

Text

under the cut i want to talk a little bit, maybe overshare as well. ill try to keep it short (rereading nat here. i didnt). its a sad post, might make some of you angry but not for the reasons you think

i was staying away on purpose, but a few people asked about me so i wanted to let you know that hey, im lurking, im waiting to see what happens. maybe some things will change in the future but im putting it out here so its all in one place

i think i want to start with saying thank you again for sticking around, supporting my art and my thoughts and having discussions with me. i really opened up about myself and what I created here. im very anxious person and it influences my life on every level, so being heard, seeing people laughing at my jokes, loving my art has been so so important to me

about the situation, the gogcident if you will, i logged out as soon as i saw things going down and been getting updates though different source. and while situation is still on going and i dont know where it will go, as how it ends, theres two or three things im firm on that will always be true for me:

i really hate how believe all victims turns into believe everyone who speaks first, no matter what they say, no matter context, no matter proof. the first statement made in this case was untrue in a lot of important details and while i dont think caitis feeling are wrong or invalid i think her first statement made this situation into something it isnt. i think every victim should be heard but attacking everyone who was accused right away is not a solution

i do believe that everyone who was accused of anything has every right to defend themselves. the way its constantly taken away from dteam is not lost on me and its insane and upsetting

you can be traumatized by the events that werent in its core meant to be traumatizing. sometimes people act shitty and leave scars on you and sometimes you can do the same to other people

edited note bc i want this to be here as well: guilty until proven innocent is a crazy mindset and i cannot imagine situation that i would allow it. some idiots dont even realise how dangerous rhetoric that is. including accusers not being obligated to provide any proof of their claims

twt is the worst thing to deal with any discourse, misunderstanding or any delicate situation. i think no ones there cares for any victims period. i wish that place the worst

okay so what now. i havent decided yet. georges and dreams moves so far confirmed for me that no matter what happened it wasnt with malicious intentions. ill wait to see how this plays out and then ill decide about my next steps. one think i did for sure is i uninstalled twt from my phone (and that already bit my ass the moment dream started his space…) that part of fandom, both people who like (liked?) and hate dream is so damn self-destructive, toxic, manipulative and performative it wasnt worth it anymore. for here, i dont know yet. i dont hate dteam, i think this is very unfortunate and sad and complicated situation that left people very deeply hurt. and i wish it wasnt this way and im pretty sure dteam also wish that. but they cant change it and i cant change it even more

now this is something i dont really know how to tell you but let me try. i never mentioned this bc when i had those realizations, it was too late, everyone moved on and i felt stupid for dwelling on this. i feel stupid now, typing this. the thing is, drituation left me quite traumatized. fucking pathetic, i know. the sudden explosion of fandom left me really badly hurt. i lost a lot of people i genuinely believed to be friends with, and i miss them dearly. i felt, fuck it, still feel deeply betrayed by some of them. i dont want people guess who is who thats not the point, those people moved on long time ago. but that hurt has been really difficult to deal with, especially since realistically i know its quite stupid. crying over some people who were following me back for a few months? but i tried to let myself heal and grow love for this community again and i thought we will be okay. drituation felt like the end of the world but we got through it and I thought we are smarter. and well. im not trying to blame anyone or even a whole community, idk maybe i want to blame the universe for putting me here or society for working this way i dont know. but im hurting and i need to find a better way to deal with things going the wrong way. and it deeply upsets me but im afraid that i have to learn how to love you all less. and i honestly dont know yet what that means, how moving forward will look like. i dont have to make this decision now so i let myself stay away from social media for a while still and then go with presented situation the best i can. i dont try to make anyone responsible for my wellbeing i want to make this clear. im just trying to share my feelings and give you context for whatever happen in the nearest future. no matter what i need more healthy relationship not even with ccs but with community itself (and if you see me rebloging hazbin hotel fanarts. spare me...)

in this place i do want to state that no matter what i dont think dteam are bad people. im not closing myself at possibility of participating in the fandom, probably less though things i mentioned earlier. but if any of those things make you uncomfortable in any way, feel free to unfollow/softblock

im leaving my askbox open if anyone has anything to say, add, or idk, scream at me. not sure if i answer any tho. also if i delete this post in the next 10 minutes out of embarrassment then well, haha

on the final note i want once again thank you all for supporting me when i needed help for my cat. you all did something amazing, something i will never forget and i wish to hug everyone of you in person. thank you

see you around. one day. maybe tomorrow maybe in 10 days. idk

and if you are moving on in different direction, if we ever meet again, dont be a stranger

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