#this is sarcasm fuck these guys

[chessb0r3d]

i cracked the code.

#believing dirk is the worst guy because its what dirk thinks of himself #ignoring daves bisexuality and think hes a gay man in denial even when he explained hes bisexual #believing john 'im not a homosexual' egbert is explicitly straight while he makes out with his mcconahey and cameron posters more #than he kissed women(literally only once) #believing that rose is an edgy psyhcotic little bitch when she was neglected. she speaks elegantly to cover that shes silly and a total ner #and how did people forget that rose also writes gay wizard fanfiction. reads Wikipedia. and her beautiful artstyle as a result of neglect #(and by neglect meaning having SO MUCH TIME to draw) #jake wasnt into dirk. he also told di that he didnt like how brobot getting touchy with him during strifes #but as part of the repression 4(prospit kids). he refused on changing the bot settings #what jane said about roxy being better when she was drunk. it was fucking sarcasm. its the least insane shit you could say to a best friend #all the kids have issues and of course people get mad over a girl being sarcastic. #when KARKAT said THE SAME THING to rose when she was drunk on the meteor nobody bats an eye #trolls are just grey humans that are bugs. he doesnt get an excuse for being an alien. humans were made from KARKATS BLOOD #jade isnt all silly girl and is so FULL OF HATE towards the trolls. she called karkat a fuckass (VERY FUNNY) to do her a favor #“jade would rather have punched karkat in the fact then had a pleasent conversation with him.” #“she viewed the trolls as rude mean and cruel. and even thought that nepeta was just making fun of her. #despite it being that nepeta just wanted to roleplay and have fun." #dred.loki #I HAVE YET TO ADD MORE. THESE ARE JUST NOTES #homestuck #chss

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so i've been watching Muppet compilations-

#currently my top three Guys are: miss piggy / gonzo / rowlf #their vibes are immaculate <3 #also im saying it. yeah miss piggy is hot as fuck. sure im jealous of kermit why do you ask #a little pig puppet has no business serving that hard #every time im watching a compilation and She comes on im immediately sitting up and paying complete attention #i also pay attention when rowlf and gonzo pop up but for Very Different Reasons #gonzo because he's gender. he's me. what more can i say #& rowlf because he's funny as fuck #like ive been watching rowlf clips from the jimmy dean show #i haven't laughed like that in a While #funny doggy.... #my favorite style of humor is like. deadpan & sarcasm & puns. yknow. wisecracks and the like #which is ironic considering half the time i dont pick up on sarcasm irl! #but suffice to say rowlf hits all the humor points with me #and there's just something nice about his design! he's friend shaped! #scribble salad #the muppets #muppet fanart #puppet brain puppet brain.... #sesame street clips have also been funny #i have watched. So Much bert & ernie #boy am i thiiiiiiirstie..... that clip has been stuck in my brain for days #and elmo's beef with rocko... what did rocko ever do to him smh... #i like watching compilations titled like 'most chaotic moments / muppets getting hurt in stupid ways / etc' #i like puppet violence! its very amusing! #i might start watching the muppet show from the start #i could make it a routine (that would quickly fall apart cause i cant keep up routines for the life of me) #that consists of watching an episode per night while i crochet #a nice little break yk yk #chip away at projects. have a laugh. sounds nice

[pixiecaps]

grits teeth oh wow cucurucho how sweet of you to throw jaiden a birthday party in an isolated location specifically without any of her friends allowed to come he truly cares about her the only one who does yea🙂

#/sarcasm #FUCK THIS GUY IM GOING TO BITE HIS HEAD OFF #liveblogging #qsmp

[cartoontees]

i watched ruby gillman and i thought it was a pretty good movie about how you shouldn't judge people by their appearances, how what you are doesn't necessarily define you, and how sometimes people's black-and-white ways of thinking need to be challenged. up until the villain twist that taught the protagonist that those things all only apply to her and everyone else actually should be judged by their appearances because their words and actions are deceptive, how what they are born as absolutely defines them and will cement their role in the story, and that if your grandma says a certain group of people that you've never met is evil well you better listen to her because she's right.

listen i actually liked the movie ok, the character designs/visuals/animation in particular was great. plus the kaiju fight was kind of awesome ngl. but from what i've seen i think we all agree that the "villain plot twist" was so shit it gives disney a run for their money...

#plus now all the lesbians on tumblr who shipped ruby x chelsea based purely off of the trailer look like fools so accidental hate crime /sar #/sar /s /sarcasm whatever you guys know what i mean #the worst thing though is that they missed their ONE chance to sort of make the twist good and believable when 'chelsea' and ruby's mom met #chelsea could have had a reaction that foreshadowed the twist but nah... NOTHING. dreamworks i was fucking rooting for you 🥲 #ruby gillman teenage kraken #tee.post

[teufort-cannibal]

looks at you guys with my big silly eyes (i have been enjoying gmod ever since i got it. like. this week. also sorry for no posts i will try to fix that)

more angles under cut :3

(i wanna just say for. the record., this is my second gmod piece, i made a ton of mistakes and got rlly stuck at multiple stages of the process, so im. im definitely learning.)

(gmod is proving to be RLLY fun soo maybe more gmod content alongside art!!?)

#boots n bombs #demosolly #tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 gmod #gmod #i bet you guys cant guess my fav ship (sarcasm) #oh dude. i fucking love these two sillies #cipherrune gmodz

[the-anime-man]

Yugioh is such a great fucking card game because your opponent can just decide "no you dont get the play the card game" and then you have to sit there while they annihilate your ass and you wonder why you thought playing card games was a good idea in the fucking goddamn first place

#i'm philosophical #yugioh master duel #this post is drenched in heavy sarcasm if you couldn't tell #guy i just fought blocked nearly all of my spaces. made it so every card gets banished and fucked my raidraptor right in front of me #also both my dad and brother were watching and my dad said to tell the guy theyre a jerkoff

[rivilu]

Rip to the Emperor, just got rejected 3 times in a row in increasingly more painful ways

#bg3 #baldur’s gate 3 #jsdhfks #empy fans turn away this is a roast post dfgjkhg #(side note i'll be using he/him for emperor just because i cant tell what the game has in mind with mind flayer pronouns tbh) #Alfhart was first and like. I dont know what Empy was expecting from the guy that hates him just as much if not more than Lae'zel does #but what he got was a very solid fuck off followed by sarcasm at his mask falling off and laughter at his threat #(Latter doesnt happen in game but it does in my heart) #Then it was Olur who was trying to keep the conversation more neutral. Until the squid flirted and he was so taken aback dnbfg #he called him a freak and that he should have thrown the prism in the shadow curse #Then poor Ayre jksf just genuinely so uncomfortable the whole way through. for a mind reader Emperor does NOT get the hint #'i dont really know how i feel about this forced alliance' ' you tried to control me :(' THEN HE FLIRTS AND AYRE IS STRAIGHT UP TERRIFIED #rip emperor you sure tried #cant wait to get to omelluum again #it's going to be SOOOOO funny when alfhart gets him out and is like : of course i saved you- i rather like you :) #POINTEDLY TO PISS THE EMPEROR OFF #only one illithid he respects and it's not you <3 fucking loser

[fanatics4l]

LMFAO the duffers saying that they created billy because they needed a human antagonist is fucking hilarious considering that MR EXPERIMENTS ON CHILDREN has been right fucking there since episode one!

but nooo!! its okay! a child who has been physically and emotionally abused by his father for basically his entire life and was abandoned by his mother who promised she'd come back and get him makes a much better villain! i mean come on! abused children who react to trauma in destructive ways because they don't know what love and affection is, is a lot more evil than a grown man who tortures children, causes a woman to go brain dead, acts like a creep towards your fav main character, and actively abused said main character + other innocent children!

dr brenner is literally an angel compared to billy! don't you guys know that? live laugh love brenner! duffer brothers, you've done it again xx

#billy hargrove deserved better #billy hargrove #fuck the duffers #stranger things #i'm just so mad #what is the duffers issue with abused children #the sarcasm is real #sorry guys im just so mad

[the-punforgiven]

So, question for the Dark Souls 2 enjoyers out there, from someone who's only played SOTFS:

That thing the enemies do in places like Iron Keep and Lost Bastille where you walk through one doorway and every enemy between you and the next boss is immediately alerted to you and begins moving in for the kill, is that like, sotfs exclusive or was that in first edition Dark Souls 2 as well? I don't mean for this to sound like mean or condescending, I'm genuinely curious if this was a change that scholar made or not

#full disclaimer I LOVE that door in Iron keep #the one with that big open space just before Smelter Demon #where you gotta lower the bridge #it was so fucking funny to me every time entering that room #and just seeing the alonne knights from the other side of the level sprinting at me like that one scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail #with Lancelot and those two guards #I just can't see those guys sprinting at me from so far away without hearing those drums in my head lol #brings a smile to my face every time #I say that GENUINELY #without SARCASM or CONDESCENSION #I think it's funny and it makes me smile I'm not trying to be a hater right now #pun's text posts #Dark Souls

[talentforlying]

LET ME ASSIGN YOU AN AESTHETIC WORD.

CAFUNÉ. cafuné means running your fingers through someone's- perhaps a lover, hair. it's such an intimate, affectionate way of showing love. if you got this result, you're a romantic at heart; very sweet, delicate, precious wandering soul. aren't you scared of your heart being too big for your body? somehow, you remind me of that pretty coral pink that bleeds into a soft indigo when the sun is slowly setting.

what i'd like to tell you is that we can't save everyone, and that's okay. you're doing your best, and it's enough.

tagged by: @danversiism!! <3 tagging: you!!

#there's literally a post at the top of my drafts Right Now talking about how much of a romantic he actually is #under all the sarcasm and bullshit he's a genuine fucking softie. he Craves love. he gives it away freely. #cafuné specifically makes me think of when he first got back together with kit ryan #and one of the first things they did as a couple was stay in bed together for 3 days. didn't leave the flat #just had nothing more important in the world than being with each other and that's how he is in MOST relationships motherfuckers!!! #justice league dark's womanizing dickhead has rotted people's brains!! commitment issues my ass this man WANTS to settle down!!!! #anyway. VERY passionate about this if you can't already tell #( character study. ) A WALKING PLAGUE OF A MAN. #( dash games. ) ALRIGHT YOU OVERGROWN LARPERS! HERE! #idk it's always 'wrecked-looking husk of a man' THIS and 'wall-licking little cryptid' THAT and 'where's that gif of matt ryan in leather' #NAH MAN. bring me the guy who spent almost a full fucking day at the shops trying to find kit the perfect christmas present!! #bring me the guy who took a depressed god out to share a coffee bc the god just looked Too Fucking Sad to leave alone!! #bring me the guy who started singing the beatles in the bar & got everyone else to join in just bc someone seemed to need a leg up!! #where is the man who took abby arcane out dancing!! tucked her in!! bought her breakfast in the morning!! all because she seemed lonely!! #that's this motherfucker!!!!!! #and yeah he is ALSO a wrecked-looking husk of a cryptid who ROCKS a bit of leather but that other guy is still in there too!!!!! #idk. IDK. i feel many things about constantine's softness always being cut away by the sharp edges of his tongue and his suffering #40th birthday party constantine lives rent-free in my skull forever and you can never take him away from me

[voltrons]

.

#jesus christ #the whole front of my building is a crime scene right now #not hyperbole or sarcasm #the guy was conscious and taken to the hospital up the block #to cover that base #jesus fucking christ #flynn.txt

[rosicheeks]

🤦🏽‍♀️🙃

#I can’t stop thinking about it #I keep replaying the morning over and over in my head #my friend said she thinks I should write a letter or text tell them #and I’m thinking about it #the more I’m processing it and it’s kinda sinking in #the more angry and offended and hurt I am #idk I know super vague post #and since you guys keep saying you like my crazy dumb Rosie rant posts maybe I’ll do one telling you guys what happened #I’m just still so fucking mad? #and she has NO idea how badly she fucked me up #she’s texting me like nothing happened and I’m like ???? ok sorry but I can’t just move on from this #anyway fun fact and update about me and my life #I’m looking into a php 👌 #partial hospitalization program #if you didn’t know what I was talking about #so that’s suuuuper duper fun (hope you can feel my sarcasm) #but at this point in my life I feel like I need it #not gonna get into that right now cause ooofda one thing at a time #but this whole situation reallyyyyy set me back in my progress and healing so thanks buddy 👌👌👌 #you are lucky I love your dog so fucking much otherwise I probably would never talk to you again #shut up rosie

[jackie-shitposts]

heyy just wondering if you're gonna make any more random Carmen stuff? i love your crack vids, and if you aren't gonna make anymore Youtube stuff thats totally fine! just love your content. thanks Jackie!

thanks for loving my stuff! but im normal about carmen sandiego now so no more videos (frantically shoving 6 videos worth of notes behind my back so you cant see them)

#in case it wasnt obvious this was sarcasm #yes i will be doing more carmen!! #though the gap between now and my last video is only 2 months #like. come on ive gone way longer without posting #this isnt a dig at this specific anon as they were very sweet about it #but as a person who creates videos for youtube its so frustrating that i cant go more than 2 weeks without posting #otherwise i will get a million comments asking 'whens the next video? why havent you posted? do you not like carmen anymore?' #and then when i finally DO post its like 'oh wow i thought you died lol. i cant believe youre alive. you still like carmen??' #i have a fucking life outside of carmen and youtube! you arent happy about it and im certainly not happy about it either! #youtube audiences specifically are so awful about this because of youtubes awful design of rewarding a constant stream of low quality vids #and ppl cant tell the difference between lower and higher quality so ppl are expecting weekly 10min+ videos from me! i am 1 fucking person! #i never get this kind of shit from ao3 man #woah. got a little too real there. sorry guys #quick look at the funny man falling from a rooftop onto his car

[ardentpoop]

i......completely forgot that dean did this so it just genuinely shocked me. what the FUCK. i would never talk to him again for this alone tbh to say nothing of all his other violations

#made me sick to my stomach lol. so great when he does that #(sarcasm. it's nice to forget that i hate him i wish he'd let me stay there longer) #but the phone swap was a very unrealistic way of enabling him to pull this shit the writers could've just had him get into sam's phone and #edit the contact names #on the other hand it's much fucking creepier the other way. so much more premeditated #either way FUCK THIS GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #spn #liveblog tag #8.09

[professorsta]

If you notice after Clint and Past coupled, Clint was already prepared to tell Past about his little figurine and all his childhood traumas. He just needed a good fuck to get his guard down and he was off to talk about himself all day Present Fucked it up when he slid in right after Clint had slid out

#Clint was scared ! #he's me he used humor sarcasm and tryna make the other person feel dumb #to cover up the fact that I am Frightened #and when he and Past had their moment where he was like Oh #so tonight's ghost wont All be ugly old angry men who like to yell at me #cool cool cool less scary maybe a quick fuck will bring some control and clear focus to this whole um #situation I'm finding myself in #and then she just left! #hes in this nerve wracking experience all you had to do was fuck him #and let the guy talk about his little action figures after as a gateway to trauma #present you should have fucked him that's all im saying if you wanted a quick fucking open hearted Clint #his post sex brain is his trauma dumping mode #spirited #Clint Briggs #present #ryan reynolds #will ferrell #a christmas carol #spirited 2022 #Clint x present

[toytulini]

new hot fresh take off the press these damn snowflake kids putting flavors in their coffee are ruining society. tiktok did this. actually fuck making the coffee even we should all just start snorting the freshly ground beans (dont you DARE buy preground!) thatll fix us

#toy txt post #sarcasm #making fun of prev post #like. sorry what #maybe you are trying to make a different point very badly. but uhhhhhhh #you literally sound like every stupid boomer comic about kids these days who cant even have black coffee #chill #someone in the notes was like wahh you guys are buying these nonstick pans and throwing them away rather than putting the work in on #seasoning a nice cast iron! like???? motherfucker lmao you think thats bad. im not even using the pans. im doing everything i can in the #microwave and toaster oven cos if i have to put more effort in its simply not going to fucking happen lol #god. god. okay. anyway. im gonna. get off the tumblr and got get food i think