#this is so goofy

[icycoldninja]

here is an idea: DMC 3 Dante x Fem hunter reader where they are dating/demon hunting partners, she falls pregnant and dose not know until when she is on a mission and she goes into labor meaning her BF (Dante) needs to deliver there baby and comfert her (example: calling her a good girl and praising her) away from the demons

OK first of all let me just say something real quick--there is physically, scientifically, and biologically no way you can get pregnant and be completely oblivious about it until labor. What about missing your period? What about hormonal and weight changes? What about pains, aches, and cramps? What about the extremely noticeable tummy growth? This whole thing is gonna be ridiculously illogical, but I'll still do it. Enjoy. 💜

Sudden labor (DMC3! Dante X Fem!Pregnant!Reader)

You and Dante had been dating for a few years now, being loyal partners both in regards to your relationship and to your job. You hunted demons together by day and passionately made love to one another by night.

One day you two sent out together on a mission to exterminate a massive clan of demons that had taken a liking to a particular forest not too far from a moderately populated city. You and Dante were doing just fine at first, relentlessly chopping down and shooting holes through creatures without end. Everything was going perfectly well, until suddenly, you felt a sudden and sharp pain shoot through your stomach. It wasn't a stomachache, it wasn't period cramps, it wasn't like anything you'd ever experienced before. It was so painful, it brought you to your knees. You dropped your weapons, collapsing onto the ground, crying out in pain. Dante heard you, and fearing that you'd gotten attacked, rushed to your side in an instant.

"Babe, what's going on? You alright?" He asked, worriedly.

"I--I don't know! It hurts...everything hurts!" You suddenly became aware of something runny trickling down your legs, and you looked down, only to find a mixture of blood and other fluids leaking out of your privates. "What the hell?!" You shrieked, fearfully. "What's happening to me?!"

"It looks like you're in labor!" Dante screamed. "How did--?! What--?! How the hell is this possible?! How come we didn't realize you were pregnant before?!"

"I don't know!" You replied, panting heavily. "What do we do?!" Dante answered you by scooping you up and carrying you to a location far, far away from the (slowly dying) demons and carefully set you on the ground. After removing your bottoms and taking a quick glance at your contracting vagina, he realized there was no time to get you to a hospital. You'd have to give birth here.

"OK," Dante began, taking deep breaths. "Uhh...push. Yeah, push. That's how you deliver a baby, right? Push!" You nodded, and though the pain was intense, you grit your teeth and pushed through as hard as you could.

"Good job," Dante encouraged, patting your shoulder with trembling hands. "You're doing great. Keep going. Stay strong. You're ok. Good girl--you're doing alright. Keep pushing." You could tell by his frantic, stammering speech that Dante was just as terrified and anxious as you were, given the sudden nature of all this, but he did his best to stay calm and collected so you could have someone to lean on.

Confused, frightened, and in so much pain, you continued pushing hard, and eventually heard a hollow pop, followed by a small cry.

"Oh my God!" Dante shouted, diving down to scoop up the baby that had just slid out of your uterus. "You did it, babe! You--you gave birth! You gave birth!" You let out an exhausted chuckle, flopping back against the ground with a sigh. Your newborn baby cried and failed about in Dante's arms, making him smile. Even though it was under really strange circumstances, you two now had a baby! Hooray!

"Is...is it a boy or a girl?" You asked, gratefully sucking in deep breaths of air.

"Y'know what?" Dante replied, sounding unsure. "I have no freaking clue. Let's go to the hospital and ask the doctors."

#Dmc #Dmc3 #Devil may cry #Devil may cry 3 #Dmc dante #Dmc3 dante #Devil may cry dante #Devil may cry 3 dante #dante x reader #dmc dante x reader #dmc3 dante x reader #devil may cry dante x reader #Devil may cry 3 dante x reader #Ridiculous #Fanfic #Kinda fluff #Giving birth fanfic #Illogical #But whatever #Requested #thanks for requesting #icycoldninja writes #This is so goofy #humorous

[marmarydoods]

...um.. i had an idea 🙂

#i did not just spend 5 hours of my life on this #this is so goofy #i hate them (affectionate) #pls tell me you see the vision #fear and hunger termina #fear and hunger #fear & hunger #funger #faht #fear and hunger daan #fear and hunger karin #f&h #marmarydoodle

[sproutlingart]

I don’t have an explanation for this

#botw fanart #sidlink #botw link #sidon x link #silly art #fanart #artists on tumblr #sproutlingart #this is so goofy #get babygirlified

[majinbangus]

Silly thought, but what if stroking Soap's cock thrice, for some unknown reason, always gave you good luck or something.

Like, maybe Soap doesn't believe in luck, but you do and you insist, genuinely and wholeheartedly, that after every time you stroke his cock three times, something good always happens to you, or something bad that was supposed to happen didn't. You're so pure in your insistence, too, that Soap can't help but allow you to stroke his cock thrice whenever you think you might need his luck.

His only condition in return is for you to give him an actual handjob later on after his luck helped you.

#this is so goofy #im sorry #soap's got a magic cock #soap x reader #john soap mactavish x reader #john soap mctavish x reader #soap mactavish x reader #soapy thoughts :]

[amasugiyuusaku]

Ace Attorney Prosecutor Headcanons: Which Ones Would I Let Babysit My Child

What it says on the tin. Unhinged ramblings

Miles Edgeworth? No, probably not. It would depend on what point in the timeline, but likely a no. He is just too likely to get entirely absorbed in something and not notice your kid falling in the toilet or sticking forks into electrical appliances. Maybe for just a couple hours. It'd be funny to watch him playing, like, Candy Land.

Franziska Von Karma? Actually, depending on the kid, sure. I bet she's better with kids than you think. She would probably take them horseback riding or something really cool and rich person that they would remember forever. However she would also 100% make your kid tuna salad and when they complained about it, she'd be like THEN STARVE!

Godot? No. Nope. Absolutely not. He would literally immediately forget the child existed. If he did happen to remember he would forget they are a child and let them just like, attempt to fry bacon on the stove at age 5. The house would be burned to the ground when you got back and he would just be like How morbid a sight when the flames from Hell encroach upon our mortal plane. Almost as dark as my coffee

Klavier? Yes! Yes, absolutely! Klavier would be the kind of babysitter kids adore and call their friend. I mean come on who wouldn't love to hang out with a rock star while your parents are away? And bonus for the parents, he's actually responsible?? Fantastic. He would teach the kids to play guitar and they would write songs together and he'd put them all on an EP for their birthdays.

Simon Blackquill? For an older child, I actually wouldn't be too against it. He's snarky and not particularly tender, but he is a very caring person and I also think he would be enjoyable to converse with if you were old enough to keep up with him. He would put on old-timey samurai movies when they got tired of talking. Also, if a burglar broke in, he would absolutely kick that burglar's ass.

Nahyuta Sahdmadhi? Nope. No thank you. Those kids would be in bed with lights out at 7pm, all vegetables eaten, and crayons put away in the order of the rainbow, and the kids would HATE him for it. Definitely the type of sitter to pull out the big lectures when kids are misbehaving rather than save it for the parents to deal with. Also, I do NOT trust him not to make a child cry. Like what if the kid was like HEy wHy aReN'T yOu mArRieD yET??? You CANNOT tell me nahyuta wouldn't just be like Idk timothy, why do you still wear diapers? 🤭🤭oop! In his defense though he would absolutely play Candy Land with enthusiasm

Sebastian Debeste is the baby

Barok van Zieks? I can't decide. I think he would do his best but the unfortunate reality is that his sheer presence might traumatize a child for life. Also since he is from you know 20th century Britain I feel like his bar is kind of low for caretaking and he'd probably be like Oh yes i let her go across town a couple hours ago, i gave her money, she will be home before the sun sets! However at the same time I also feel like he's secretly a hobbyist cook and makes them a nice dinner and then afterward stokes a roaring fire in the hearth and reads Grimms' Fairy Tales

#ace attorney #hcs #headcanons #ace attorney headcanons #babysitting #miles edgeworth #franziska von karma #godot #klavier gavin #simon blackquill #nahyuta sahdmadhi #sebastian debeste #barok van zieks #this is so goofy

[parasiticshades]

*Destruction sound in the background*

He said it'll be alright to his dude*

Dude* is mesmerized by the view he has

Someone request for jake so here he is. I actually draw this like few days ago lolz I forgot to post it here

#art #artist #ibispaint #digitalartist #ibispaintx #digital art #homestuck #homestuck art #homestuck fanart #homestuck jake #jake english #dirkjake #some gayness is implied #drawing #this is so goofy

[flowersofnaivete]

#trent reznor #trentreznor #nine inch nails #nineinchnails #tds era #this is so goofy #but i like it for some reason #not mine

[kerfufflearts]

I was intensely bored the other day, have a Firelight comic

#no plan just comic #gabriel o'hara #firelight #spiderman #spiderman 2099 #comic #dinosaurs #my art #this is so goofy

[glorber]

ryker and riker

#811 game #811 fanart #digital art #ibispaint art #star trek #will riker #ryker dublin #811 leon #tribbles #this is so goofy #spock #811 beetle #crossover art

[strangestland]

Okay, but why is Jekyll with only one eye visible so funny?

#the glass scientists #tgs #this is so goofy #they turned him emo #why am i laughing

[fnaf-news]

a look at the 16 Inch Toy Bonnie plush that will be a GameStop exclusive. huh

#this is so goofy #i was listening to lemon demon like a normal person does and then this popped up on my screen #why #do i have to post this #fnaf #fnaf news #five nights at freddy's #five nights at freddys #fnaf merch news #funko #fnaf merch #fnaf 2 #toy bonnie

[fuck-i-love-october]

The outsiders is a beautiful piece of media regarding the story of a group of misfits navigating themselves through a life of poor choices, pain,and great loss, showing us the intimate and soft moments between all of the chaos and hardships they withstand, touching the audience and gaining a sizeable fanbase surrounding their heartening story.

"Hey but lets ship ourselves with the hot characters!"

#the outsiders #the outsiders book #ponyboy curtis #johnny cade #darry curtis #sodapop curtis #two bit mathews #steve randle #come on guys #this is so goofy

[tlgadtv]

Drew Treech again. Because, if you can’t already tell, I really love him

It doesn’t really look like him but idc

#treech tbosas #treech thg #tbosas #i love treech so much #treech #treech fanart #this is so goofy #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas fanart #art

[frostleni]

I love how I always got the dumbest and most useless shit to say about this show

For example i analysed what Rei and Miri ate and drank during their No-Kazuki-Day

So at the start of episode 7 it showed that Rei and Miri ordered 1 medium pizza, but by the time Kazuki comes home theres one more box of pizza there...

So during the day they ate two medium pizzas, french fries, and cereal for breakfast. There's also a bowl with chopsticks inside, and knowing that Rei likes quick and easy junk food, it was probably ramen that he ate (Miri doesn't use chopsticks)

There's also an opened bottle of coke, and five cans of some drink (one has a straw, so it could've been for Miri, making me think it was just juice in those cans- or Rei drank with a straw). Miri also had a juice box

What a fulfilled day!!! As someone said, Miri gets the best of both worlds (homecooked meals AND junk food)

#buddy daddies #rei suwa #miri unasaka #this is so goofy

[skulemojee]

DRDTtober 21: Kid

this drawing is so silly but i took too long on it so i might as well post it 😨 also dont even question it i dont know either.

#drdt #despair time #fanganronpa #drdt fanart #david chiem #drdt art #arei nageishi #eden tobisa #drdttober #drdttober2023 #this is so goofy

[c10v3r]

i was inspired (the tism hit again /SILLY)

shes running circles around them

#this is so goofy #i lovoe them #inanimate insanity #ii lightbulb #ii paintbrush #lightbrush #it is always on the mind . i am never free #/JJJ