#would I be able to sleep tonight?

[somerandomdudelmao]

this is so bad that people are asking you when your comic updates are so they can sleep.

Yall really SHOULDN'T do that, its messed up, im just speaking from my standpoint but hearing stuff like that i wouldn't even Want to update anymore or announce wips or anything with all this "when is it coming out? can i sleep? can i do this? is it coming out soon?" i mean asking for WIPS of the comic seems fine but asking when its coming out bc its affecting you is wild. and not good. imagine what type of stress that is on a person to know that people arent taking care of themselves until the comic comes out.

idk it feels like some of yall dont know how to act. this comic is a passion project if anything. it just seems. so unhealthy and offputting to deal with this from an audience. idk.

:т

#would I be able to sleep tonight? #tell me when is the update so I can finally sleep #don’t get me wrong here #I don’t judge anyone for not sleeping because of the comic #I was the same lmao #but bruh #it would be nice if you stop making your health my responsibility #if I had nickel every time someone tried to make me promise updates through quilt #I would have like…..hundreds? of nickels #idk #I had something like 15 whenistheupdateiwanttosleep asks only today #not the worst thing I ever had in my asks tho but still #All said doesn’t apply to Hoddi and Tapa btw #They are special #thank you anon:)

[snappysprinkledog]

in yet another act of horrific cruelty dracula has dangled the idea of having a collective pet dog infront of the townspeoples faces only to savagely rip it away because he is an awful little creature of the night

#dracula daily #i am honestly adoring the dog thing tho #like #i mean obvi british people arent the only people who love dogs but also like #people giving more of a shit about the dog and the spca being popular and in town and people being upset about the dog is so fucking british #nation of dog lovers and all that shit #i like to imagine if dracula hadnt managed to get away when he first landed and had been caught he would be being acosted by people trying #to spoil the poor ship dog and give him treats and shit #fighting over whos house hes sleeping in tonight #the town is in mourning over not being able to find a god #incredible

[cheerfullycatholic]

Some rando just pulled up our driveway and asked if we wanted to sell any of our cars and now I'm paranoid that they have nefarious intentions please pray for us

#i think its weird to ask that is it weird or am i just weird? #we dont have that many cars in our driveway and none of them look like theyre for sale #also woth facebook marketplace and craigslist and all of cars i see for sale in town #why the hell would they be going around to other peoples houses? #no i think im right to not trust because it was weird and im not gonna be able to sleep well tonight

[chaos-and-ink]

So at work today one of my regulars saw me pouring milk into a tin to steam it and was like “why are you elbows bending like that? Your shoulder blade is popping out-“ and I was like “yeah it does that” and I’ve never seen him look more concerned.

#I’m taking half a dose of my pain meds tonight and hoping I’ll be able to sleep bc in the last week I’ve only slept like 5 hours total #if my shoulders and knees could be normal tonight I would appreciate it much #chaos #heds #hypermobile elhers danlos syndrome

[likeabxrdinflight]

I find out about internships tomorrow and I'm not nervous. nope. who'd be nervous. not me.

#anxiety I don't know her #will I sleep tonight though that's the real question #worst case scenario for now is I don't match and would have to go into round two #which is not ideal but also not the end of the world #still it'd be much better to just get a placement tomorrow #and finally be able to plan for next year

[golyadkin]

trembling in my boots at the prospect of being able to tell you guys about [redacted] project like it's not even art but you best believe I'll be posting about it on every single blog i have if it comes to fruition

#not art #sorry to be a tease about it but lakdfjhgsfgksjahsdfkjashldfkjhasdlgfas #got a really auspicious email this morning #we're coming closer to the possibility of this being real #and i'm hardly able to contain myself #i won't know for some time to be fair and even if it gets the thumbs up it'll be a while still before it's like #available #but i genuinely never thought this would get this far and i'm coming face to face right now with the fact #that the dream i've had since i was like 8 years old might be coming true #like let this be your sign never to give up on a dream #might be a platitude but in this case i'm all in on it #idk if i'm going to sleep tonight lmaooooooo going to be checking my email a million times a day until i hear back #i would say more specifics but i don't want to jinx it #i'm running on luck as it is #ok i love you goodbye

[werepires]

.

#having a hard time processing my grandpa’s death tonight #and the fact I wasn’t able to properly grieve as we were driving behind the hearse #because my mother decided to drink 6 glasses of wine during the reception #and her drunk ass was laughing in the backseat #like I get everyone deals with grief differently and some people choose to numb their feelings with alcohol #but idk I just wish she would’ve considered we also lost someone #is that too much to ask? #like oh hey maybe my family would want to process their loss too #instead of having to listen to me tell them how drunk I am every 2 minutes :))) #anyway I should sleep lmao #it just… idk it upsets me that even with these kind of things she refuses to think about anyone but herself #delete later

[daughterofhecata]

Got my writing session yesterday cut short by a visual migraine that got to the point where I couldn't see the keyboard anymore, and now the damn thing is *back* and idk yet if I'll be able to write later -.-

#and i can't very well keep chugging coffee at this time of day to make it go away #there's still some coke in the fridge that i'll try in a sec (although it's probably flat as well by now) #but i'm in suuuuch a mood to start the rbei!bob prompt fill for january... #this is mean. i usually *never* get this shit two days in a row #let alone at this intensity #...i'm pretty much blind rn. at least on the left eye the right is a bit better. #i can deal with a headache but this static shit in front of my eyes is *really* annoying #kaj rambles #to delete later #if anyone knows any home remedies i'd love to hear about it because my only one is caffeine and i would like to be able to sleep tonight

[arowrath]

im so fucking tired it's unreal i dont want to Do anything i just want to lie in bed for the rest of my life.

#text #trying not to think about how fucked i am if i fail this semester. w hich is looking likelier and likelier with every missed assignmetn #also apparentlyu my gov professor sent ellen a rly nice email sayinfg that she could tell im trying and that she appreciates that #and she emaield me saying smiliar and. :(((<3 god. #guy who cries really hard when authority figures are kind towards him #i need to just. get stuff done i need to just keep trying #but im so so exhausted #i want to go to sleep but its room check week and idk if my RA is doing room checks Tonight or later this week #i dont want to be in here when they do them bc im anxious #but i dont want to be in public either #and i cant be outaide bc its very cold. #well ig i could but i wouldnt be able to be on my puter bc my fingers would get so cold you understand #i need to find a dark quiet private room to hang out in that isny my room and theres nobody else in there

[narc1ssis1ic]

I fucked around and definitely found out

#hypomanic #hypomania #why is this happening again #mental health team said they would call me back but that was 7 hours ago #i wont be able to sleep tonight #actually bipolar #bipolar type 2

[arionawrites]

1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!

2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr

3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!

overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!

#aritalks #i did cry a little bit when i first woke up because i dont really know what to do about work and also i hate not having a car i can use #not only because of the work aspect but also getting my license when i was 18 gave me a freedom i didn’t have before #and i don’t like having to rely on other people just to like go to the fucking store or something yk #but then my best friend/roommate messaged me happy birthday and i was like fuck it! today is going to be a good day! #the stressful uncertainties can wait until tomorrow #also one of my best friends who hasn’t said happy birthday to me the past two years #(not intentionally im p sure they were just busy on my birthdays the past two years #and then had that moment of ‘oh shit i didnt send a message fuck i think its too late now’ which i totally get bc anxiety things yk) #was one of the first people to message me happy birthday!! #i’m also hoping to still be able to go see my mom and then stay the night at my dads tonight #so i can see both my parents and also my baby siblings for my birthday #my dads working today but after he texted happy birthday i sent him a text asking if he thinks we could still make it work #my mom is asleep still i think (she called me at midnight and left a voicemail singing happy birthday!! but her sleep schedule has been all #over the place recently so i’m waiting until 11:30 to call her which is in like 30 mins) #but she said something yesterday about driving out to me to give me a hug and also bring me my diabetes stuff that got delivered #(her house is my mailing address because i know it’s not going to change bc it’s my great grandparents house that she’s partially inhereting #when my great grandpa dies but since i have moved out of my dads my address has changed twice and i didnt have a mailbox at my last place so #just for the sake of consistency and not having to worry about important shit getting sent to the wrong address i’ve had her house as my #mailing address since i moved out of my dads at 19) #so i think i’m gonna ask her if she can just pick me up instead so i can go to her house w her and hang out with her #and hopefully my dad will be able to at least stop by with my siblings so i can see them too #i’d like to stay the night with them but if we can’t make it happen then i can also stay the night w my mom and hopefully tomorrow figure #out the car situation. might have to rent a car for a week if i can afford it? best case scenario is my moms car can be fixed but i still #dont know whats wrong with it ik there are two potential problems and one is fixable the other is not #the fixable one would cost like $150-$400 to fix depending on if we get a used part or a new one #if its $150-$200 ish i can probably afford to pay for the whole thing or at least most of it #but if its more than that hopefully my dad or one of my family members can help #and i can just pay them back in like $50 increments with my next few paychecks #just realized i said i wouldnt worry abt the car thing today and also i think im at tag limit to i’ll stop now lmao xoxo gossip girl ❤️

[heartshattering]

they should invent a nighttime that doesn't make OCD worse

#at least it's not just me according to a quick search I did #but still ughhhhhh #I know what I need to do to cope but then when I'm in the moment it feels like I'm literally dying #I would get into more detail but explaining the stuff that goes through my head sounds so ridiculous like ????? #I know I already did [action] so there's no need for me to get out of bed and repeat it 20+ times before I let myself sleep! #I... I don't do that during the daytime... because that would feel ridiculous and irrational #but Nighttime Brain is like “you gotta” #don't try to reason with OCD because it Does Not Care! :') #the fact I'm able to recognize how ridiculous this is should be comforting #but like I said in the moment all my mind wants to do is convince me that tonight is the night I'm gonna die #and that it's all my fault and that I've ruined everything #I would not wish this on anyone #(except as a free trial to those people who say they want OCD when they don't really understand how much it sucks to deal with it) #sigh #anyway it's only 3 PM but I'm already dreading nighttime so that's why this popped into my mind #I'll be fine

[redpiperfox]

But mainly, and really:

#red's week in music #STORYTIME WITH RED GATHER ROUND KIDDOS! #was at kids club tonight and went in knowing little 8 year olds mom had her baby this morning and lil girl was now big sis if two #and knew she hadnt come from home bc her hair was a mess of someone who didnt know curls trying to do it lol #shes generally emotional and dramatic but we can all see that shes a lil more so tonight. understandably. lotsa change #well she kinda hinges on this one thing of not getting the verses said to earn a jewel bc she wasnt able to say them-- totally fine! we'll #practice and get them later! but shes distraught bc she worked on them with mum and wont get jewel so i keep telling her when we'll work on #them together and when ill listen to her and we can get it done. cool. then lesson time shes up and down sniffly and the lesson says smth #about childbirth-- bursts into disarray. i ask her if she wants to step out and we blow her nose and she keeps talking about the verse so i #tell her solutions for that and then shes working herself up so i work thru calming down and she goes from #“i think im mad” to “mom would let me do what i want!” and i know the real issue isnt the verse but thats what shes telling me so... #adult shes staying with cautiously steps in and she calms down to tell me “its not the verse... i think i miss my mom” #oh my heart i know honey i give her a hug and we talk about the sleeover shes going to have and when shes going to see mom #and shes sleeping next to lil sis so shes going to give sis a big hug and tell her theyre going to see mom in the morning #and then i ask her if she wants to go back and she does and i just hold her and hug her the whole time #i give her another squeeze when she leaves and tell her to enjoy her sleepover #her friend shes staying with i should not did a very sweet of coming over and saying “hey lookit this new book i got do you wanna color it #with me maybe?“ which was such an emotionally mature thing for her and to see lil kiddo cheer up warmed me #teachers we debriefed and talked about kids going thru stuff at home and not being able to tell and process their emotions and stuff #and then i shared with mum on the ride back and she goes “yup. lil toddler will just miss mom-- its trauma at this age. this is why i #panicked and called my mother to come for your sis's birth bc dad said he could handle you but my heart couldnt for what you would go thru.“ #i was six when my sister was born. my grandma being there before consistently made me giddly excited in that time waiting for dad to bring #us to the hospital. #anyway my heart was full and im praying extra hard for two lil girls in a sleepover missing their mom tonight. #red's personal sitcom #Spotify

[exopelagic]

okay facing consequences of my actions

#I thought I’d gotten away with it this time #okay it’s 3am and I may have discovered something that completely ruins me #everyone is asleep so I can’t tell if this is me being sleep deprived or not! #so I need to sleep now but I haven’t cleaned my code up or written my answers #I do Not have time #if I don’t sleep now I’m gonna be having a bad time tomorrow morning and I am significantly less productive rn than I could be #with other people around I kinda need that y #so I should go to bed. but also. this code needs cleaning. but also. even if I fall asleep now I’m only getting like 5 hours MAX #I need a good few hours tomorrow morning to have a shot at doing this properly #so it would be more useful to sleep now and wake up as early as possible than keep going tonight bc I’m not going to finish tonight #okay. fuck. I hate this #if I could think straight I’d be able to fix this easy which is probably a good reason to sleep #it’s just an annoying logical problem that I gotta follow through bc currently I’m stuck between three possibilities and there might be more #I have these two rasters and I gotta calculate the area overlap #the first method counts the number of presence points in each (probably) and then counts the number in overlap raster w manually set values #the second counts total predicted points and points where they’re predicted to be alone and does a calculation with that for each species #that one with all points from both species + pseudoabsence. vs method 3 which does that with just individual species coordinates #method 1&2 are now homologous now I JUST caught the logical error but method 3 is what he gave us #but actually he might have fucked up in not including pseudoabsence #i don’t know if method 3 works for two different species either honestly #it gives me results I like much more (my overlap is 100% for one of the species and that shoooouldnt rlly happen even if it’s possible) but #I think it might actually just be wrong because it can’t account for #wait so the line is taking the prediction for all coordinates for each species for each species’ initial coordinates. and not pseudoabsence #and that set of predictions for each species coordinate set is then taken and yeah it’s no longer comparable you can’t count each alone #not with two different species bc you need an overlapping dataset to do that OKAY I have solved that logical problem my initial method works #which is annoying bc the result sucks but whatever I checked the rasters and it’s actually identical so #okay now I’ve figured that out. twenty minutes later. sleep I think it’ll help most #luke.txt

[summerlycoris]

Guess whos potentially working a triple tomorrow?????????

Im going to transform into my final form if this shit keeps up i swear to god.

#summerly talks #im just. gonna have to tell my boss that. effective immediately. i cant work the weekend anymore #sad because its good money #but this is becoming a fucking pattern and if it does i may actually dive into a fission reactor while singing meltdown ;_; #like. i was okay with the double? my coworker called in because her baby was sick #and she promised me if i couldnt get anyone to cover for my am shift tomorrow she would take it #then at like 9pm i get a text saying. she cant. her baby wont let her leave #and i feel selfish because. she has a baby. but i have cats and luckily i was able to drop by today to pick up my sleepover kit #and also make sure minty had food. (fieldie has an auto feeder so hes okay) #and i just. want to go home #the reality is i cant. i cant go. not unless one of the people i texted gets back to me saying theyll come in #and no one has yet. its 11pm. no one will at this point. #im tired im tired im tired #i dont want to end up like i did at my ladt job. giving away entirely too much of me and destroying myself #ive already lost most if not all of my passion for this job #and when i was younger i dreamt of working with disabled people. i burnt too quick and now im a shell of what i was #but this is the only thing im trained for that would allow me to like. keep my home #maybe if or when i move to brisbane i can look into a different job. do an it course idk. something where there's less people skills needed #i better try to get some sleep orz tonights gonna be a bitch of a thing

[harmonizewithechoes]

It’s my middle child’s 3rd birthday today 🥺

3 years ago my partner was deployed overseas and couldn’t come home for the birth because the military didn’t want to spend so much time quarantining their soldiers. Fortunately I had help as my parents were watching my son (at the time just a month shy of 2) for a few days before my due date and we had moved across the street from my partner’s parents when we found out about the deployment. So I had his mom with me at the hospital holding up her phone while we got to have a rare video call with my partner as we welcomed our daughter into the world after a very quick labor. I then had two months with our two very little kids by myself before he came home. It was an incredibly hectic time and I’m still not quite sure how I was able to get through all of that but here we are with the sweetest little 3 year old (let’s call her C) we could have asked for 🥰

C loves to play dress up and she has specific characters she’ll play as where you can’t refer to her as her name or she’ll get mad. She’s not C she’s Dr C or Baby or Baby Kitty or Princess Bucket (this was her first character and yes she does put a bucket on her head as a crown). Her favorite game to play is hide and seek and she loves dance parties and drawing and she’s obsessed with her 1 year old sister. We love C so much and I’m so excited to see how she grows and changes and learns over this next year ❤️

#personal #tonight her and her little sister are sleeping in their beds in their very own room for the first time #they’ve had their beds in my bedroom since we moved in and very often just ended up in our bed #but I’ve spent the past few days getting the room we’ve used for storage ready for them #and they’re doing really well so far #I’m sure they’ll end up in my bed again at some point but this is at least a step in the right direction #our crib that we’ve used for all 3 babies turns into a toddler bed and as I was taking it apart and putting it back together in the new room #my son started crying because he didn’t want his sisters to be big girls in their own room #he wanted me to put everything back and make the 1 year old 0 again so she could keep being a baby #I should point out that he is also obsessed with his baby sister #I told him that’s not quite how it works and kids are meant to grow up #and then he asked yet again for a baby brother because he loves babies so much and then he’d have a brother just like him 😅 #he’s very sweet but also…. that’s not happening lol #I’m slowly becoming a person again and being able to focus more time on hobbies #and my partner and I now have our room back #all of that would be reset again with another baby not to mention another year of nursing and diapers and sleepless nights…. pass lol #I’m emotional about my babies growing up but I’m also so excited to learn who they’ll become as time goes on #sorry for rambling I get sappy on their birthdays