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letitrainathousandflames · 1 year

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First off, I loved the story. Second, what happened 👀👀👀

(Not particularly heavy stuff, but an emotionally abusive situation is mentioned, so TW for that, I guess? Also if u have anything u want me to tag here, just send me an ask and I'll do it. Also this is a long post, but that's what u get for asking someone with adhd to tell a story ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

Alright, so like I said, I my first bf and I met in highschool and we stayed together from me being 15 to 26. A decade plus one of emotional abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, my friends being cut off to further my isolation, and me being too inexperienced to see the guy for the asshole he was.

And, like I said, my therapist from that time was a goddamn genius who saw how much I was suffering but also could tell I would not get out of that situation willingly bc I was so used to that being my life and the whole "he can't be abusive - he never hit me!" mentality that I couldn't see that he would cheer me up when I was down - but he was the one to put me down to begin with!

So she said "how about you two take a break? One month away from each other, with no strings attached, not bf and gf anymore, so you can see whether this is a relationship worth fighting for" (it wasn't, lmao)

Me, a week after: so, he's gonna be traveling in two months after this one and-

She, very serious: fascinating! let's make it three months then! You'll meet again when he's back, it'll be great for everyone!

The thing is, when you date someone that swallows up your entire life and cuts your bridges to everyone else, you end up pretty lost and alone (this is literally the tactic cults use to force people to stay in the cult, by making sure they won't have a community to support them once they are out).

But! My bff, bless her heart, never left my side no matter how often I would ghost her while i was still dating. And after I'd spent that first month (november of that year) moping and crying like someone had died, she invited me to go clubbing and I actually got to dance and be silly for the first time since my early teens!

Being undiagnosed autistic/adhd and having my ex as my only social interaction outside of my family AND not doing well socially in school bc bullying made it a bit of a challenge to come on to people, so my bff would be my wingwoman - hey, my friend thinks you're cute, etc.

For some reason, the ladies shot me down a lot, which sucked bc I really wanted to kiss a girl and "find out" whether I was bi (I thought I needed this as proof, lol). But the boys had those looney-tunes eyes at me so I got to kiss some of them and it was fun and stupid and so freeing.

And then there was her. Julia. Even my adhd brain still remembers her name. She was much taller than I, with full, black hair and a raspy voice that made me go heart eyes over her. I asked my bff to chat her up to me, and when instead of politely shaking her head with an apologetic smile as the other girls did, she walked up to me.

Then she asked me whether I wanted to kiss her, and I said yes, and she leaned over me and the world stopped spinning for a moment because I was kissing a girl and it was soft and sweet and good and oh my god, so I do like girls, of course I do, they are so pretty and amazing and oh wow, I am bisexual, that's a lot to unpack and-

And then she was smiling, and saying goodbye bc she wanted to meet up with her friends, and I was left in the middle of that rooftop dance floor, under the stars, my ears ringing and my face burning hot. I had my answer. I had my truth. I had it all along, but now it was real.

So just on account of that, month two (december of that year) was already chalked down as better than the entire time I had ever spent with my not-yet-entirely-ex, but I went out with my bff other times and had just as much fun. Incidentally, the hidden quickie with the handsome guy only happened bc I was intensely fueled by a spiteful thought of "aw hell no, I won't close this year without having boned someone other than [redacted]!". So uh. Yeah. The say love makes you do things, but hooo boy, the things that spite makes u do!

Anyway, moving on! January rolled out and my soon-to-be-ex sent me a text for us to meet, and we did. We caught up at some public place, and at some point he asked me whether I wanted to get back together.

Now, the first sentence that popped into my brain, in all caps, was: "I'D RATHER DOUSE MYSELF IN GASOLINE AND LIGHT A MATCH LMAO" but I unfortunately held back enough to say "I think we're much too different people now" while choking back laughter. So he asked to be just friends and I was like, ah well, I guess?

And we had this whole talk in the cab on the way to drop me off at my place, and this is where the nickname to which I refer to him now, "the deceased", came to be.

See, he was very clearly trying to lay the groundwork to try and build a relationship with me again, talking abt how different people can still get along even if they're exes bc we are both so emotionally mature, etc.

And I jokingly say the most absurd thing I could think: "yeah, and even if we're different, it's not like you're gonna... idk, vote for bolsonaro".

And he did a double take. And. Very shyly, he said he was, in fact, gonna vote for him. Y'know the genocidal, pro-dictatorship, homophobic, corrupt, nightmare of a president with which we were later plagued with for four years in the middle of a pandemic.

That's when I realized this dude wasn't worth keeping around even as a distant acquaintance, and I had a whole mental funeral for this guy bc he would be dead to me from then on. Sad music, flowers, the whole thing. Rip in piss, as y'all say around here.

Once we arrived by my place's door, I asked him to wait in the cab while I went up real quick. When I came back, he was like "oh?? you wanna go somewhere else from here?"

and I simply shoved the very large plastic bag I'd carried down on the seat next to him, explaining: "no, it's just that this is all your crap that was still in my house and I don't want it here anymore. Bye."

What a terrific place to end this story! How dramatic! I mean, that guy was the worst thing I've ever had cling to me in my life, and that includes that one time in the woods when I was a kid and like a hundred ticks bit me.

Well, close the curtains on this show, then! This is a satisfying ending and surely you never heard of him again, right, OP? Right, OP????

[press X for the next stupid anecdote about the deceased]

[press Y to never hear about the deceased again]

[vanilla extract] (sorry I had to)

If this made you laugh, buy me a ko-fi to help me continue to afford the therapy I so clearly need lmao

#long post/#lu's stories #abusive relationships/#emotional abuse/#what I love about this story is that the only thing that might be wrong there are some dates bc adhd brain #but yeah it was. a ride #i still quote the gasoline quote sometimes #also obsessed with my stupidass logic:#ok u wanna kiss girls. u find them hot. but what if you kiss one??? and don't like it??? then ur het #lu you stupid bisexual bless ur heart

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puppetmaster13u · 5 months

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So I am rotating the batfamily, but not like, civilian or vigilante. I am slowly rotating them all having a Malone-sona of sorts that is their in to organized crime.

Like you can't tell me people wouldn't start noticing this family that the bats, the literal cryptids and monsters of Gotham, don't even touch and lets continue to operate despite taking the older crime families apart.

And to Gotham that screams power.

Alfred = Albert “Old Al” Malone I wanna say that he doesn't go out as 'Old Al' often, but gives off Godfather sort of vibes. Usually sitting there with an old cane (that definitely has a sword, they're all dramatic like that lol) half in the dark with a cup of tea or other drink. He gets to stretch his acting skills and honestly the kids definitely had a say in the persona. Old Al is something they all made together and they have fun implying so much fun shit.

Kate = Mary “Madam” Malone She definitely gives off 'snap your spine over her knee if not for the fact it would get your blood all over her clothes' vibes. Stylized nails, hair up in fishtail braids or ponytails or whatever, looks like she could tear out ones throat and they'd thank her. It's a running gag that she's in finances, even if no one in the underbelly believes it.

Bruce = “Matches” Malone I mean, it's classic Matches (though most probably assume that Matches isn't his real name) who seems rather chill until someone breaks the rules. Gives off vibes that he doesn't usually get his own hands dirty but will do so to make a point, and enjoy doing it. He sometimes uses Matches to check in on places he can't as a shadowy cryptid, and it's not like the lower income areas would fully trust Brucie Wayne.

Barbara = Madison “Maddie” Malone Now let's be honest, Barbara enjoys messing with people, she enjoys knowing every little thing as Oracle, and she definitely does that as Maddie. The thing is, no one knows how she learns about things, other criminals search for a traitor, for a leak, for anything, and get nothing. Which is utterly terrifying. Because there has to be some sort of information network, there has to be. And somehow they're so good that they're indistinguishable to any others.

Dick = Micheal “Mikey” Malone Honestly Dick uses this chance to get into a bunch of fights just for fun. Flirts a bit more freely but doesn't really have an interest in actually getting with someone. Just has funs and is known for throwing his own parties that usually end in free-for-all brawls. He absolutely loves being able to have parties that are the opposite of galas he's usually dragged into.

Cass = Molly Malone She's quiet and graceful, but she takes it to unnerving levels as Molly. Looks slim but carries guns on her at all time to better differentiate between Cassandra Wayne, Black Bat, and Molly Malone. Everyone knows if you need a weapon, guns, meelee, whatever, she's the one you go to. Gotham help you if you cross her though.

Jason = Peter “Petey” Malone Where Molly Malone goes, everyone knows Petey will be there as well. Jason absolutely adores the time he gets to do so, it's his turn to be silent and dramatic. Everyone can recognize the jagged scar over his neck, they can recognize it from corpses the Bats have gotten their talons on. Honestly he's delighted in being able to be Cass' enforcer of sorts and just have a good fight. Even if he complains about how making his Malone mute makes it where he can't quote Shakespeare like he wants to.

Steph = “Mia” Malone Ah yes, the explosive Malone. The one who has more arson charges than Firefly. Or at least she would if she was caught, but the entire Underbelly knows it was her. Steph is living her best life being able to pull all sorts of pranks and crazy shit and takes several ideas from Harley. Honestly she probably smells like gasoline or smoke all the time, and definitely put glitter in her hair. Maybe even has red hair as a Malone as well.

Tim = Alvin “Al” Malone He still goes by Alvin Draper too, which results in half the underbelly thinking that Draper is his middle name. Honestly he's having the best time, everyone knows to come to him for forgeries and less than legal identities, which he loves to create. I mean just look at how many new identities he creates for himself alone. He enjoys this type of thing, and hey, it's so easy to keep track of whose identity is fake when you're the one who made them. Plus it also lets him do good for those on the run for good reasons, a way to make sure people are safe.

Duke = Dennis “Denny” Malone Everyone knows Denny was adopted, but y'know what, I bet they don't care. And you know Duke is utterly insane, like jump off a bridge to escape the cops and create the We are Robin gang insane. And he gets to play that up as Denny. He will put forth the most batshit ideas and actually pull them off. I bet he uses his future-sight to cheat at different games and pool tables and all sorts of things, but no one can ever prove it. Because there is no proof, and the other people playing just has to deal with it.

Damian = “Mini M” Malone The little baby of the family, who everyone knows the older Malones absolutely dote over. This is his chance to act like an actual child, just with a hint of art theft. Hey, it wasn't like they got it legally either, so it's free game, especially if they weren't taking proper care of the art or a pet. He's just pleased to get to have even more pets, and that Goliath his demon dragon-bat gets to go on walkies.

Jarro = Jadan “Lil J” Malone Now Jarro is delighted to have a third mech, and is even more delighted for people to believe Damian (or technically M jr) and him are twins. Gives off someone is going to die- of fun with Mini M, and honestly enjoys being able to use his natural telepathy to be a small horror movie child that knows too much. Like will stare up at someone with wide eyes covered in blood and the others in Gotham's underbelly still aren't sure if the blood was his or someone elses. (it was neither)

================================================

Honestly I might write a oneshot or something for the Cryptid Batfam focusing on just them as the Malones family.

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meme-queen-pumpkin · 2 months

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RP STARTERS: QUOTES FROM THE CROW

All these starters are quotes from the movie "The Crow"

"It can't rain all the time"

"Is that gasoline I smell?"

"And I say 'I'm Dead' and I move"

"Take your shot"

"Victims; Aren't we all"

"Believe me, nothing is trivial"

"You still have your hat on"

"Buildings burn, people die, but real love is forever."

"I thought, you know, you were invincible."

"I was. But not anymore."

"What're you supposed to be? A clown?"

"Sometimes..."

"I thought I'd use your door."

"You don't remember me?"

"Stop me if you've heard this one"

"You heard me rapping, right?"

"(Name), you're not paying attention."

"Are you some type of ghost?"

"Mother is the name for god on the lips and hearts of all children."

"Take your shot, (name). You got me dead bang."

"I see you have made your decision. Now let me see you enforce it."

"Nice outfit. Not sure about the face though."

"Look, I'm begging you, alright? Don't kill me."

"I've got something to give you. I don't want it anymore."

#rp resources #rp meme #rp #rp resource #movie quotes #quotes

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riddlemethisjeremy · 1 month

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On that post about autism winning you put in the tags how cannibalism isn't a great survival food source can you elaborate more on that because I'm genuinely curious

yes actually !!

So there are a few reasons for this

The first one, which im pretty sure i mentioned in the tags, is that human flesh is actually really low on calories.

And i know

"calories bad 😡😡😡 high calorie food isnt good for you etc. etc."

This is a diet culture myth

Calories are actually the human body's main source of long term energy your body converts it into fat to store it and then burns the fat to make energy when food is scarce/when you're using a lot of it at once.

Having a high calorie diet is like pretty good for people in stamina sports because it means they won't burn out too quickly.

When you're in a survival situation where food is scarce, you're gonna want foods either high in sugar so you can get your energy boost straight away (humans are not this because we burn through sugar like its gasoline) or high in calories so that you can preserve your energy and live longer, and so you can last off the same bit of food for longer. Food that is high in calories tend to be filling because your body is getting a bunch of storable energy really quickly and you do not need as much of it at once to live.

Because humans store energy as fat, though, a lot of the calories in it tend to burn when you would be cooking human flesh, meaning that most of the useful survival nutrients likely will be wasted. And making the assumption that this is a city person who is resorting to cannibalism as a final option, they probably would not be able to stomach raw human/not a hundred percent but it could possibly kill you? I know human meat gets compared to pork/chicken quite often and they're both white meats, which you can't eat raw. So in the basic sense of getting energy off of the food you're eating, humans just don't have the correct nutritional balance to sustainably keep you alive you'd have kill and eat another person every like two-three days whereas animals like pigs/goats/sheep you could live off for at least a week before they start to spoil (and even then if you cook it thoroughly uts still technically safe to eat for like almost a month) so if you can find something similar in your wilderness environment do so

Also don't quote me on this but pretty sure a good way to tell for meat with decent calorie intake is muscle vs fat

Beef cows are often bred for muscle as opposed to fat because the fat just lacks nutrients and doesnt satisfy hunger very well

So if you have a himbo friend they're going first just saying

But also humans aren't really naturally built to build muscle as well as they build fat, so either way chances are you'll still end up lacking calorie intake.

Reason number two !!

A pretty fuckin big one

Kuru

Kuru is a protien disease (i think thats the word). I dont know all the sciency shit but basically inside your brain you have these little chemicals and theyre unique to you. They like float around your body a little and vibe idrk why they're there.

However

When you ingest human flesh

The other persons little protein things attack your ones.

Most of what i know about the symptoms of kuru come from this one zombie game my dad used to play (z nation or gen z or some shit like that it was a super hardcore survival game) so like dont quote me too much on this

But basically it deteriorates your brain functions. You like start getting forgetful/judgement/risk evaluation gets affected/emotional management fucks off completely (you get all manic sometimes i think and like hysterical laughing is common in later stages) and eventually your brain just kind of in general stops functioning and you die.

And it takes a little while like a couple weeks or something i think depending on the amount of human flesh you consume.

And like you won't always contract a lethal level of kuru i think, like generally the further away from the brain you are the better off you'll be? Like if you eat a human brain you're practically dead on arrival but if youre munching on toes you have to eat like four or five people's worth to die

Fun fact: the penis is the only place on the human body this protein isnt found which means eating dick is safe.

But yeah kuru is nasty and i do not recommend to the average tumblr user.

Please bear in mind that i am not a science nerd do like the more scientific shit i am not a hundred percent on and you should probably take this with a lil grai of salt because i might have oversimplified or misunderstood something

But this is more or less why cannibalism is not a great survival tactic and should definitely be the last of last resorts

#Jon speaks #Answering asks #Autism wins ig #tw cannabalism #canabalism #Survival shit #Just stuff i know for some reason #No it actually makes me so happy when people ask me weird questions like this #I should totally post a list of my interests/hyperfixations/ocs/stories and like beg people to send asks i love this #Thank you so much random citizen #I hope your curiosity is satiated #I cant wait to be a high school teacher guys the kids are gonna love me #Had to put this in queue cause apparently ive reached my post limit (homophobic)

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cowboylun · 3 months

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my favorite favorite quotes from the catcher in the rye. this book is not for everyone because the main character can be difficult; but honestly as someone with depression i found a lot of connection with him and his irrational behaviors.

"The best thing, though, in that museum was that everything always stayed right where it was. Nobody'd move. You could go there a hundred thousand times, and that Eskimo would still be just finished catching those two fish, the birds would still be on their way south, the deers would still be drinking out of that water hole...Nobody'd be different. The only thing that would be different would be you. Not that you'd be so much older or anything. It wouldn't be that, exactly. You'd just be different, that's all. You'd have an overcoat on this time. Or the kid that was your partner in line the last time had got scarlet fever and you'd have a new partner. Or you'd have a substitute taking the class, instead of Miss Aigletinger. Or you'd heard your mother and father having a terrific fight in the bathroom. Or you'd just passed by one of those puddles in the street with gasoline rainbows in them. I mean you'd be different in some way--I can't explain what I mean. And even if I could, I'm not sure I'd feel like it."

"The best part in the whole picture was when old Ophelia's brother--the one that gets in the duel with Hamlet at the very end-- was going away and his father was giving him a lot of advice. While the father kept giving him a lot of advice, old Ophelia was sort of horsing around with her brother, taking his dagger out of the holster, and teasing him and all while he was trying to look interested in the bull his father was shooting. That was nice. I got a big bang out of that. But you don't see that kind of stuff much. The only thing old Phoebe liked was when Hamlet patted this dog on the head. She thought that was funny and nice, and it was. What I'll have to do is, I'll have to read that play."

"Then something terrible happened just as I got in the park. I dropped old Phoebe's record. It broke-into about fifty pieces. It was in a big envelope and all, but it broke anyway. I damn near cried, it made me feel so terrible, but all I did was, I took the pieces out of the envelope and put them in my coat pocket. They weren't any good for anything, but I didn't feel like just throwing them away. Then I went in the park. Boy, was it dark."

"But you don't have to be a bad guy to depress somebody--you can be a good guy and do it. All you have to do to depress somebody is give them a lot of phony advice while you're looking for your initials in some can door--that's all you have to do. I don't know."

""How much is it, for God's sake?"

"Eight dollars and eighty-five cents. Sixty-five cents. I spent some."

Then, all of a sudden, I started to cry. I couldn't help it. I did it so nobody could hear me, but I did it. It scared hell out of old Phoebe when I started doing it, and she came over and tried to make me stop, but once you get started, you can't just stop on a goddam dime. I was still sitting on the edge of the bed when I did it, and she put her old arm around my neck, and I put my arm around her, too, but I still couldn't stop for a long time. I thought I was going to choke to death or something."

"But what I mean is, lots of time you don't know what interests you most till you start talking about something that doesn't interest you most. I mean you can't help it sometimes. What I think is, you're supposed to leave somebody alone if he's at least being interesting and he's getting all excited about something. I like it when somebody gets excited about something. It's nice."

"Then I started doing something else. Every time I'd get to the end of a block I'd make believe I was talking to my brother Allie. I'd say to him, "Allie, don't let me disappear. Allie, don't let me disappear. Allie, don't let me disappear. Please, Allie." And then when I'd reach the other side of the street without disappearing, I'd thank him. Then it would start all over again as soon as I got to the next corner."

#quotes #literature #classic literature #words #the catcher in the rye #jd salinger #academia #on depression

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swedebeast · 1 year

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I have now finished watching Babylon 5, and this is my first complete rewatch of the show since I first saw it on Swedish television - Kanal 5 - in 1998. And 25 years later, I find it to still be one of the best science fiction television shows every made.

It was a great experience to watch the final two seasons (the ones I had not seen in 25 years) and recall old memories of the show. Specific scenes, specific lines, some I have more context for when they quote literary works or “current” events that I was not aware of in the 1990′s - but also realizing certain memories and being able to place them as being FROM this specific show. It was also fun to realize that basically all my memories I had that I knew were vivid and clear were accurate, but also equally fun was it to see details I had forgotten. Sometimes completely forgotten, or do “oh shit, I remember that!” when it came up.

Also it is interesting to now be aware of possible sources of inspiration for the elements of Babylon 5.

The homeworld of the Shadows was Zha’ha’dum, which featured a massive casm and an ancient alien entity long thought gone, surviving in hiding at the bottom. Khaza Dum was the Dwarven name for Moria in Lord of the Rings, an abandoned city of Dwarves which was destroyed by an ancient entity that was thought to be long gone and hid in the dark.

Hyperspace is a space of alternate space where ships travel faster than light to reach different locations in space, which enhances psychic ability. The War from Warhammer 40,000 is an alternate dimension which is used to travel faster than light between different locations and it is mirrors the presence of psykers in real-space and it is filled with psychic energy.

In the final episode (not wanting to give away spoilers in a 25 year old show but hey), in which post-apocalyptic monks lament that Rome does not recognize their chapter that saves and copies old books to preserve knowledge and science - and is in the works to create a working power generator running on gasoline. In A Canticle of Leibowitz, we have an isolated order of catholic monks in California that traces their ancestry to “Bookleggers” and work to make copies of books and preserve scientific knowledge from before WW3, and it features a chapter of the monks having re-created a power generator (which they operate while chanting “Anima Lux!”)

If these are coincidences or deliberate references or homages, I cannot say. But it was fun to watch this show not just being more aware of these tropes, but to see the tropes with a new point of reference. When all is said and done, I can truly recommend Babylon 5. The first season suffers a bit from what sci fi shows of that age suffers - it is a bit horny and a bit cringe - but it does not subtract from the great story, themes, and excitement of the show.

Do yourself a favour and give it a watch.

#swedebeast reviews #babylon 5 #shows #tv #sci fi #science fiction

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padfootastic · 1 year

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Good day! This ask has ANGST, i'm sorry, ignore if you're not in the mood for this! I was re-reading today first chapter of Philosopher's Stone and when you remember that while wizards celebrated Voldemort's downfall with parties, shooting stars etc Sirius was tracking Pettigrew down, half-mad with grief and anger… It must have been fraying his fast nerve, seeing how happy for everyone was the day James (and Lily) were murdered because he failed them. Or in Prisoner Of Azkaban when Harry first time tried to protect Sirius from Dementors, that quote when 'Sirius was crouched on all fours, his hands over his head. “Nooo,” he moaned. “Noooo… please…”.' Dementors can make you relive worst memories, and when Harry saw his parents’ death, Sirius found their bodies… Considering all the torture narrative had for him, Sirius was very resilient and kept very high spirits, still able to laugh and find joy in life even in fifth book. I mean, so much of all this is writing for angst sake, but by god sometimes it hits hard!

yes!!! u get it!!! the immediate aftermath of that hallowe’en would’ve been so bad for our boy :(

like, not only did he lose his entire family in one night, but it was because of his other friend, and partially because of an idea he proposed.

and to make it worse, the entire wizarding world is celebrating the day, it must’ve been like fkn gasoline on a fire for him. depending on the timeline of things, this could’ve also contributed to his frenzied actions w peter ykno?

and god, i know, right? sirius is so ridiculously tough. we have so much proof. it’s a wonder he wasn’t lying catatonic in a sewer somewhere tbh.

#sirius black #ykno i’ve always wondered why that part is never brought up in the books #that hallowed basically doubled as a celebration for the elder potters deaths #considering the whole thing is narrated by harry who’s very attached to the image of his family #(or maybe it is and i just don’t remember tbh)#like—that last part is why some kinds of sirius characterisation bother me sm #the one where he’s super dramatic about little things and can’t deal with anything on his own #like dude. DUDE. there are a few things we know for sure about him.#if you really want to change it so bad then—atleast don’t play it off as canon hello???#ugh sorry that’s one of my soapboxes lol #pen’s asks

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coochiequeens · 2 years

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Ladies be careful. This guy is free.

Content Warning: This article contains graphic details of a crime committed against a child. Reader discretion is appreciated.

A trans-identified male who brutally raped and tortured a little girl to death has completed his sentence and been fully released from New York Department of Corrections and Community Supervision custody.

Synthia China Blast, born Luis Morales, was sentenced in 1996 for the horrific rape and murder of 13-year-old Ebony Nicole Williams. Blast, along with his boyfriend Carlos Franco, were sentenced to 25 years for the crime, one that had both sexist and racist motivation.

Blast and Franco, members of the Almighty Latin King and Queen Nation gang, targeted the young girl less than 24 hours after she had run away from home. Williams was known to sometimes run away from her home in Harlem, and her mother hadn’t initially suspected foul play when she didn’t show back up, assuming she was staying with extended family as she had done in the past.

The same day as Williams had run away, she was kidnapped by Blast and Franco, and taken to an apartment in Hunts Point where she was held captive. The men had likely recognized her from previous visits to the neighborhood she had made while looking for a place to stay with her older sister, and some accounts state that she had been targeted based on her race.

Blast repeatedly raped Williams, and he and Franco tortured the young girl further before stabbing her in an attempt to kill her. Realizing she was still alive after having been slashed by Blast, Franco then stomped on the child’s neck until it was broken.

Following her death, Blast and Franco packed the girl’s small body into a box and dumped it near the Sheridan Expressway. Finally, they doused the box in gasoline, and set it ablaze. A passenger on a nearby train saw the flames and called 911.

After extinguishing the fire, attending detective Sergeant Michael Garvey noted that there had been no means of identifying Williams as she was completely naked, and had been badly mutilated. “All I saw was that her hair had been worn in corn rows,” he said at the time of the investigation.

During the trial, Bronx Prosecutor William Hrabsky said of the crime: “The suffering that this poor child went through is beyond belief and puts this crime in the category of monstrous and barbarous.”

Despite pleading innocence in court and to media in later interview, Blast had reportedly “bragged” about committing the crime to friends, some of whom would later testify against him on this basis. Blast and Franco both received 25-to-life for the murder of Williams, but the rape charge was not pursued.

Blast reportedly suggested he avoided the rape conviction because of his gender identity and homosexual orientation.

“They had to switch their story in the trial because how do you tell the jury that he had on a dress and then he was raping a girl?” He is quoted as saying, claiming he had never had sexual intercourse with a female. But the determining factor was likely that DNA was unable to be recovered from Williams due to the state of her remains, which were so destroyed that she was only able to be identified through dental records.

During the trial, Blast and Franco were reportedly blasé about the crime they’d committed, and had even been laughing at times during the hearings. A statement given by Yvonne Hill, Williams’ mother, at the time of their sentencing condemned the two for their behavior throughout the process.

“Ever since the trial was going on, all I see is Luis Morales grinning and Carlos Franco, too,” Hill said, referring to Blast by the name he had used at the time. “You ain’t smiling today. I hope you both rot in hell.”

Following his detention, Blast became a noted advocate for incarcerated trans people’s rights, successfully demanding the state of New York provide him with feminizing hormones in 1999, and suing the state in 2003 after having been refused sex reassignment surgery.

Blast repeatedly became a media sensation for his sexual exploits while in custody, beginning a romantic relationship with Heriberto “Eddie” Seda, a convicted serial killer who had sought to murder one person of each zodiac sign as an homage to San Fransisco’s infamous Zodiac Killer. Blast and Seda’s relationship was dotingly covered by the New Yorker in 2004, who even commissioned a portrait photograph of the couple.

“I met my friend, lover and infamous husband… the NYC Zodiac Serial Killer,” Blast told the New York Daily News. “My sweet serial killer is a lady’s man now. Only if I was a real woman I could bring about little future serial killers to terrorize NYC like my husband did. How [New Yorkers] would of loathed the Zodiac Children.”

Blast and Seda were ultimately separated from each other by the Department of Corrections.

In 2015, Jezebel published an article condemning Blast’s treatment while in prison, noting that he had been in involuntary protective custody (IPO), or solitary confinement, for almost two decades. The article followed a petition launched by the Sylvia Rivera Law Project (SLRP), a trans activist legal organization, which sought to pressure New York State into releasing Blast from IPO. The SLRP had, at one point, used Orange is the New Black actor Laverne Cox to speak on Blast’s behalf.

The Jezebel article slammed “trans-exclusionary” feminist Cathy Brennan for calling Blast a “man who now identifies as a woman,” and glossed over the details of Blast’s crime in favor of giving him a platform to claim innocence.

Blast was similarly profiled in a 2017 VICE article in which he called for trans-identified males to be housed with women.

According to the New York Department of Corrections and Community Supervision (DOCCS), Blast was paroled in 2018.

One year after being paroled, Blast appeared as a member of the Sylvia Rivera Law Project’s prisoner advisory committee, and was interviewed in a video with three other trans-identified males. The video was posted to the SRLP’s Facebook.

“I came from being in a jail cell to learning about SRLP and its mission, who Sylvia Rivera, as a person, actually was, and … about Marsha P. Johnson, and I was definitely hooked into this movement,” Blast said.

“We all have a voice. And we live in a time, today, where that voice is finally being heard. We haven’t reached that milestone yet. We are all screaming together, and now they are finally listening,” Blast says, then beginning to promote the SRLP as a center which can help transgender people change their names and legal identity, “Whenever I find a transgender person, I ask them: Do you know about the Sylvia Rivera Law Project?”

The most recent update on Blast’s file with DOCCS shows that he was discharged from parole supervision on July 30, 2022, quietly marking the completion of his sentence for the 1996 murder of Ebony Nicole Williams.

By Anna Slatz Anna is the Co-Founder and Editor-in-Chief at Reduxx, with a journalistic focus on covering crime, child predators, and women's rights. She lives in Canada, enjoys Opera, and kvetches in her spare time.

#New York Department of Corrections and Community Supervision #New york #Sylvia Rivera Law Project #Synthia China Blast is Luis Morales #Rest In Peace Ebony Nicole Williams

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gabriel-shutterson · 1 year

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I posted 3,506 times in 2022

That's 3,506 more posts than 2021!

519 posts created (15%)

2,987 posts reblogged (85%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@klqrambles

@bingosomen

@suspiciouslyglowingmoss

@aftout

@aliens-took-my-iwa-chan

I tagged 1,827 of my posts in 2022

Only 48% of my posts had no tags

#nonlaconic rambles - 390 posts

#gothic lit - 155 posts

#frankenstein - 94 posts

#jekyll and hyde - 68 posts

#ask - 51 posts

#victor frankenstein - 41 posts

#the invisible man - 40 posts

#gabriel utterson - 36 posts

#henriel - 32 posts

#the picture of dorian gray - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 131 characters

#other than the punch scene the funniest part of the book imo was when charles entered france and was surprised when he got arrested

My Top Posts in 2022:

hi hello what’s your favorite quote from The Invisible Man

i’ll start, this is mine:

121 notes - Posted August 13, 2022

I was thinking. As an oldest child myself, I suffer from oldest child syndrome.

Now, anyone who has been following my blog lately knows that I’ve been kinning Victor lately. This got me thinking.

Frankenstein Spoilers in the following explanation

Victor has two younger siblings biologically, plus Elizabeth— a sister figure. Out of these four, he is the oldest.

When thinking about Victor, his defining personality traits (other than sopping wet and pathetic) are anxious, perfectionistic, solitary, obsessive, a little egotistical, etc etc.

Funny thing is, all of these traits are associated with eldest child syndrome. Typically, these are brought on by high parental expectations. Now, as a C*roline and Al*ones hater, it’s pretty obvious that their expectations for Victor were a little much. I mean, Caroline’s dying wish was to control Victor’s love life. Alphonse preserved this wish, even reminding Victor of this said wish while he is recovering from his arrest and death of his closest friend. Alphonse and Caroline are also probably homophobic, I will not be taking criticism at this time.

That being said, there’s almost no question as to why Victor hardly talks to his family in Ingolstadt. Why he obsesses over his work, freaks out when it’s not up to his standards, abandons the paternal role he’s been forced into all his life. Also explains why he’s only miserable when it comes to marrying Elizabeth, and doesn’t argue about it at all. And why he’s so close to Clerval, someone who genuinely seems to care for his opinions and wishes.

I dunno. It’s definitely a theory that should be thought into.

137 notes - Posted August 28, 2022

Shoutout to this line from J&H specifically, in which Mr Guest asked if Jekyll was sending Utterson love letters

164 notes - Posted August 18, 2022

Lo and behold, the promised headcanons.

Crack Headcanons for many lit characters (Mod Au):

~Lanyon still sleeps with a teddy bear, but denies it.

~in order to pay off college, Kemp worked at Dairy Queen for two (2) days. He was fired when the blizzard fell out of the cup ;-;

~Dorian watches RuPaul’s Drag Race

~Jekyll actually pours the milk before the cereal

~Lord Henry uses Reddit

~Clerval cries whenever Gordon Ramsay yells on MasterChef

~Victor almost killed a Girl Scout over thin mints once

~Jekyll was this close to drinking gasoline 🤏 and by that I mean none he’s drank gasoline before it was very unhealthy

~despite being well spoken, Utterson cannot pronounce ‘synonym’

~griffin owns 8-10 cats and they are all fluffy and white and named after dictators (Apawf Kitler is a sphinx cat tho, Grif felt bad for him)

~other than cats, Griffin also loves geese, because they go “HONK” and yell and bite and is funny and relatable

~Elizabeth can beat Victor up if she wants to

~in college, Basil sometimes drew the vibe check emojis in Lord Henry’s notebooks

~Lanyon enjoys the feeling of wet socks

~Dorian is a crystal and astrology bitch

he once claimed he liked astronomy not astrology and all the scientists got excited and then he started talking about being a Scorpio and Jekyll cried, Victor swore, and Griffin kicked the wall

~Basil actually enjoys being called a simp. He doesn’t see the harm in it .

~Griffin would dress as a cat maid, unironically

~Utterson used a joke pickup line (because pun) on Jekyll once, causing Jek to pass out

~if asked “boxers or briefs,” Griffin would reply “thong” (it’s actually boxers)

~Basil can and will get angsty if the first chord of ‘All Too Well’ comes on

~Clerval believed in Santa until he was like 14

~Jekyll cannot ride a bike and refuses to learn

~Jekyll uses Hyde to talk to customer service people because he gets scared

~sometimes Hyde just. Carries around a kazoo. And blows it at people.

172 notes - Posted July 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

So I saw a post that kind of made me want to post this.

I feel like there’s a lot of gatekeeping in the J&H fandom. I’ve see a lot of posts like “you’re wrong if you like TGS” “you’re not valid in the fandom if you interpret the duality differently” “we don’t stan if you think Jekyll is cis.”

It feels really toxic, imo. I interpret the story differently than others, and that’s fine. A lot of the story is really open ended and up for interpretation. Specifically with the second point with the duality, I’ve seen hate on the “Jekyll has OCD” interpretation on here in the past, and like? Why?

While that’s personally the interpretation I choose to agree with, that’s not what I’m talking about in this post. There’s really no need to hate on seeing the book differently. As with most other fandoms, you’re not looking at the big picture. There’s a group of people who enjoy the same media as you, and you’re really just going to trash their opinions?

I dunno. I don’t really have a solid point I’m getting at. It just pisses me off. I have a lot of opinions about the book that I’m afraid to share, and I’m sure tons of others do too.

Please be nice y’all. It’s not like Stevenson is coming back from the grave to confirm any interpretation is right.

178 notes - Posted August 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Yay #:)

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crimeloyalty-arch · 2 years

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LIST 5 SONGS THAT INSPIRE YOU TO WRITE YOUR MUSE.

me and i - abba - part of me is acting while the other stands beside. yes, i am to myself what jekyll must have been to hyde. we’re like sun & rainy weather, sometimes we’re a hit together, me and i.

gasoline - halsey - pointing fingers ‘cause you’ll never take the blame like me ; and all the people say ‘ you can’t wake up ; this is not a dream. you’re part of a machine ; you are not a human being. ’

no good deed - wicked - one question haunts and hurts, too much, too much to mention. was i really seeking good, or was i just seeking attention?

tied together with a smile - taylor swift - i guess it’s true that love was all you wanted, ‘cause you’re giving it away like it’s extra change -- hoping it’ll end up in his pocket, but he leaves you out like a penny in the rain ‘cause it’s not his price to pay.

motion sickness - phoebe bridgers - i’m on the outside looking through - you’re throwing rocks around your room - and while you’re bleeding on your back in the glass, i’ll be glad that i made it out and sorry that it all went down like it did.

& LIST 5 QUOTES THAT INSPIRE YOU TO WRITE YOUR MUSE.

“ sorry about the bony elbows, sorry we lived here, sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwell and how i ruined everything by saying it out loud. especially that, but i should have known. you see, i take the parts that i remember and stitch them back together to make a creature that will do what i say or love me back. ” ⸻ richard siken, crush.

" when she lay there on the ground, she dreamed of time machines and revenge and a love that was really something, not just the idea of something. when she finally rose, she rose slowly, avoiding old haunts and sidestepping shiny pennies; wary of phone calls and promises, charmers, dandies and get-love-quick-schemes. ” ⸻ taylor swift, why she disappeared

“ oh, i could call you names now. list a hundred reasons for why you were awful. but what would that do? where would it leave me? i still loved you. i still have to live with that. ” ⸻ sue zhao

“ when i met you, i thought i had found the person that i was going to spend the rest of my life with. i was done! all the boys and all the bars and all the obvious daddy issues, who cares? i was done. you left me . . . i'm all glued back together now. i make no apologies for how i chose to repair what you broke. ” ⸻ grey’s anatomy

“ what matters isn’t if people are good or bad. what matters is, if they’re trying to be better today than they were yesterday. ” & “ the point is, people improve when they get external love and support. how can we hold it against them when they don’t? ” ⸻ the good place

stolen from: @gunbash tagging: every single one of u.

#⸻ every time you call me crazy i get more crazy — study.#⸻ i haven’t met the new me yet — headcanons.#i mean it's not really a headcanon but like -- if you're in my headcanons tag i feel like i want you to see this

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quinnpedia · 1 year

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⸻a collection of songs & lyrics.

list five songs that inspire you to write your muse.

no good deed - wicked - one question haunts and hurts, too much, too much to mention. was i really seeking good, or was i just seeking attention?

and list five quotes that inspire you to write your muse.

“ oh, i could call you names now. list a hundred reasons for why you were awful. but what would that do? where would it leave me? i still loved you. i still have to live with that. ” ⸻ sue zhao

tagging ⸻ anyone reading this at any point!

#dash games.

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songsformonkeys · 3 years

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SONGSFORMONKEYS MASTERLIST

The Third Wheel - Javier/f!reader. Fake marriage slowburn with some bickering. Flashbacks - Javier/f!reader. Javier saves reader from a kidnapping. She’s a little unsure if he’s even real or just a figment of her imagination. Desperate Means - Javier/f!reader. You and Javier are roommates. Sometimes you bring home one night stands. Turns out Javier has some issues with that. Smut. In Her Eyes - Javier/f!reader-ish. There’s war in her eyes. Javier wonders if it haunts her as it does him.

A Tiny Piece of the World Called Home - Ezra/f!reader. Ezra and reader work together on a small moonbase. First they bicker then they fuck. All The Things He Missed - Ezra/f!reader. Five times you meet Ezra. Five things he’s missed while he was gone. Inquiries for Ezra - Not a fic but an ask Ezra blog where I post some Ezra stuff.

Digging Up Bones - Whiskey/f!reader. Reader is the head of the medical department with the Statemen. Whiskey keeps making up excuses to come and see her. She is clueless and decides to read several books on hypochondria. (WIP)

Leaving Traces - Din/f!reader. You and the kid have been successful in avoiding anyone who comes looking for him, but then a Mandalorian bounty hunter picks up your trail and suddenly staying one step ahead of capture gets much easier said than done… (WIP)

Conference Call - Maxwell/f!reader. Maxwell fucks you during a conference call. No plot, just smut. (written pre movie) Aftermath - Maxwell copes with almost ending the world and is adopted by a stray cat. Angst. The Way Back - Maxwell/OFC. Post ww84 fic. Angsty redemption fic where Maxwell moves back to the small town where he grew up, to work for an ex-girlfriend who hates him. (WIP)

Bodyguard verse (listed in chronological order):

First Meetings - Javi Gutierrez/genderneutral!reader. The first time you meet Javi Can’t wait to see you - Javi Gutierrez/genderneutral!reader. Your first day at your new job. A tour of Javi’s villa. Never Let Go - Javi Gutierrez/genderneutral!reader. You and Javi watch a movie. Driving Home - Javi Gutierrez/genderneutral!reader. It’s not quite the road trip Javi had hoped it would be but you still enjoy these moments in the car with him. End Credits - Javi Gutierrez/genderneutral!reader. Angst. This is just angst and a Nic cage quote. Alternative/less angsty ending here Colds & Birthday Celebrations - Javi Gutierrez/genderneautral!reader. It’s Javi’s birthday party and you’re sick. I’ll Do Better - Javi Gutierrez/genderneautral!reader. Javi is in a mood and you’re sent to talk to him. Saying I love you through a movie - Javi Gutierrez/genderneutral!reader. They go camping... sort of.

In Hot Water - Joel/f!reader. Showersmut. There’s no plot here.

Triple the Price - Veracruz/f!reader. You need someone to transport you to meet up with your sister in Villavicencio, and hire Veracruz to do the job. (Loosely inspired by Romancing the Stone)

Wrong Numbers and Cake Emergencies - Marcus/f!reader. Reader gets a text from an unknown number, requesting assistance in a cake-related emergency. Is it possible to develop a crush on a stranger in your phone?

Whiskers & Fangs - Max Phillips gets turned into a cat and has to rely on the kindness of his secretary while he tries to figure out how the hell to get his body back.

Nemesis - When you end up drugged and unable to look out for yourself, you show up on the doorstep of your nemesis, goody two shoes Marcus Moreno, hoping that he’ll take you in.

El Ladrón - The Thief/reader. They warned you about him when you started working at the castle. El Ladrón they called him. The Thief. Stealing from the Devil - The Thief/devil!reader. Only foolish thieves attempt to steal from the Devil…

Burning Alive - Dave/f!reader. Smut inspired by the lyrics to the song Fire Meet Gasoline by Sia. There is no plot here. Quicksand - Dave/f!reader. Smut inspired by the lyrics to the song Free The Animal by Sia. All The Best News - Dave/f!reader. For once, you wake up before Dave. You sneak downstairs to do some writing before he joins you on the couch. Seven Years - Dave/f!reader. Dave trails a former colleague. Is he there to kill her? She sets a trap for him. Bullet wounds and Bandages - Dave/f!reader. Dave shows up at your home in need of medical attention.

A Sturdy Home verse (listed in chronological order):

Pancakes - Dave/f!reader. Soft fluff where Dave makes pancakes for the family in the morning A Sturdy Home - Dave/f!reader. A bit of domestic bliss and smut with Dave York as you wake up together in the morning. Last Goodbyes - Dave/f!reader. Their last conversation before Dave leaves to go after McCall Ghost of You - Dave/f!reader. Angst! Dave survives the fight with McCall but loses all his memories. Christmas With(out) You - Dave/f!reader. Angst. The first Christmas since Dave came back. Valentine’s Day - Dave/f!reader. A little bit of angst. It’s Valentine’s Day. No one really celebrates.

Snapshots - Steve/Eddie. Eddie is wounded in the upside down. And as his friends try and get him help before it’s too late, Eddie drifts in and out of consciousness, remembering bits and pieces of his life so far.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Writing Prompts For various Pedro characters (and a little bit of Boyd).

Masterlist kink prompts for various Pedro characters (and a little bit of Boyd)

12 days of Christmas Pedros - Masterlist. 12 fluffy and soft Christmas ficlets.

A year of saying I love you - Masterlist. 12 stories for various characters and pairings.

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jmnjmnjmn · 3 years

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Your Noona | Requested Idol!JK x NonIdol/Noona!Reader | Fluffy Oneshot

Pairing: Idol!Jungkook x NonIdol/Noona!Reader

Sides: ChildhoodFriend!Taehyung, Friends!BTS

Keywords: noona, age gap, secret crush, f2l

Warnings: swearing

Word count: around 5,500

There is mention of a house warming party. In Korea it is somewhat traditional to bring over toilet paper and cleaning supplies when going to such gathering, so please don’t be surprised when YN talks about the stacks of tp in her apartment xd

Request

Inspo board

Masterlist

Noona

Noona is a word used by Korean males to address females older than them who they are close to (biological or not).

With her leather handbag full of gifts and trinkets from France weighing on her shoulder, YN pressed the elevator button. She waited in front of the heavy steel door, staring at the bright red light-up sign above it.

“10, 9, 8.” She counted in her head as the numbers went down signalling the coming of the elevator. “7, 6, 5.” She sighed, unable to brush off the tiredness caused by the jetlag. “4, 3, 2, 1.” The door slid open with a quiet bell sound. YN hesitated before pressing in the correct number. “Was it 6th or 7th?” She whispered to herself, cursing at her forgetfulness. She ended up pressing both numbers.

Looking into the mirrored back wall of the elevator she checked herself out, making sure there were no imperfections in her outfit, hair, or makeup. Her camel-coloured coat reached right to her knees, leaving just the right amount of leg out to look cute, but not feel too cold in the winter’s cold weather. She unbuttoned the outer garment to take a look at the light brown mini skirt and blazer combo she wore today. Paired with an ecru blouse, nude tights, and white leather sneakers she looked rather casual than smart.

A robotic female voice announced the elevator’s arrival on the sixth floor of the building. YN looked out the door, unsure if that was where her best friend had his studio. She stepped out onto the somewhat familiar corridor, looking around for anyone to ask for directions. She walked down the long hallway, white lights above her head, unmarked doors to either side of her, unrecognizable chatter behind most of them.

“Where are you Kim Taaehyung?” She muttered under her breath, simultaneously reaching into the pocket of her coat to fish out her cellphone. “Tae-hyung-ie.” She syllabized while typing in her best friend’s name into her contacts. She raised the device to her ear right after starting the call. “Pick up, pick up, pick up.” She whispered quickly, hoping she didn’t drive out here for no reason. The static beeping noise was abruptly broken and replaced with the familiar low voice of a boy she knew since kindergarten.

“YN noona?” Taehyung asked and his surprised tone echoed through both of YN’s ears. She looked around, taken aback by the weird stereo effect she was experiencing. She turned to look behind her and saw one of the doors she passed by opening.

“Taehyung-ie, are you at your studio?” She asked, skipping over any greetings.

“Y- yes, why?” He answered her with another question. He wasn’t expecting her call and had to excuse himself from dance practice to pick up.

“Taehyung-ie!” YN exclaimed, seeing him walk out from behind the opening door and onto the bland corridor.

“Noona?!” Taehyung yelled into the phone making her wince at the incredible volume of his voice. “Oh my god!” He discarded his phone into the back pocket of his jeans before running up to and engulfing her in a suffocating hug. “YN noona!”

“Ah, seriously?” YN gasped out the bits of air that he didn’t manage to squeeze out of her lungs with his strong embrace. “Let go of me.” She groaned, pushing him away playfully. He had the sweetest boxy smile on his face and her expression wasn’t too far off of his.

“When did you come back?” He ran his hand through his black hair. It was still slightly curly with remains of the perm he got a couple of weeks back.

“Last night, you crazy person.” She chuckled, punching his arm and he squirmed jokingly.

“Ah, noona.” He sighed, his eyes dreamy with all the happiness he was experiencing at this moment. Spontaneously he threw his arm around her shoulders, bringing her into a side hug. “I missed you.” YN felt her heart growing warmer with every second.

“I missed you too, Taehyung.” She admitted without hesitation earning a giggle from her friend.

“Why are you here?” He asked after a moment, realizing she should be thousands of kilometres away, working in her company’s European branch. “I mean- I thought you weren’t coming back until next Chuseok.” He corrected himself not to sound rude.

“Yeah, well I got bored of Paris.” She shrugged, unconvincingly since there was a mischievous grin plastered across her face.

“Bored? Of Paris? You?” He cocked his eyebrow at her, knowing she’s withholding some juicy piece of information from him.

“I just missed Korea too much to stay away for any longer.” She looked up at him with that same grin.

“Yeah, right.” He scoffed.

“And…” She elongated the word as she slipped from under his arm and stopped to stand face to face with him. “I got a promotion!” She finally exclaimed, grabbing his hands in hers.

“Congratulations!” He screamed out, matching her excited pitch.

“Thank you!” They jumped up and down, tugging on each other’s hands for a moment longer before Taehyung stopped to ask an obvious question.

“So who are you now?” YN smiled, happy to hear him ask about her new position.

“Say ‘hello’ to Y/Company’s/N’s youngest C.A.O..” She said in a jokingly seductive tone, smiling brightly.

“What is that?” Taehyung scrunched his eyebrows in a frown. YN exhaled a chuckle at his lack of knowledge about company titles.

“God, it’s- it’s Chief Administrative Officer.” She explained but seeing his expression stay the same as it was she decided to go deeper into the description of the post. “It means I’m a top-tier executive who supervises daily operations of the company and I’m also responsible for its overall performance.”

“That’s good.” He nodded unsure if it was good.

“Hell yeah, it is!” YN laughed, wrapping her arm around his shoulders with some struggle since he was now taller than she was.

“Does that mean you’re moving back to Korea?” He looked at her with hope, but she didn’t notice as her gaze was directed forward.

“Yeah, at least for a couple of years.” Taehyung shoved her arm off of himself in shock.

“A couple of- that’s great, YN!” He pushed his chest against her face when he suddenly hugged her tightly. “I’m so happy for you!” He screamed, rocking them both side to side.

“Thank you!” She snaked her arms around his waist before pushing away. She was usually the one breaking hugs and ending sad goodbye’s because if it was up to Taehyung she would never leave his side. “I’m also so very happy, but still, a little bummed I had to leave my Parisian life behind.” She whined slightly, looking down onto her fumbling hands.

“Ah, but now you’ll start your Seoul life again.” Taehyung spoke in a tone of a visionary. He put his arm behind her back and used the other to drag over the imaginary horizon. “With me by your side, it won’t be that bad.” He added quickly.

“Won’t be bad at all.” She chuckled, putting an elbow to his side.

“That’s what I like to hear!” He laughed out. “So, when are you buying me dinner?” YN scoffed at his forwardness. Sometimes he just loved to take advantage of their month-long age gap.

“Who do you think-” She was getting ready to teasingly scold him, but interrupted her with a loud call.

“Jungkook-ie!” He exclaimed, looking to the door he earlier exited. “Look who’s here to buy us dinner.”

“You little- wait, that’s-”

YN barely managed to keep her jaw from dropping at the sight of the boy she last saw about a year ago - face to face at least. She saw all the boys of BTS all the time during her Skype calls with Taehyung, they’d often drop by to chat or whatnot, Jungkook included, but seeing him in real life… Was an experience, to say the least. He was fit, there was no way around it. Well dressed. With a handsome face and a good haircut. YN sighed as she was reminded of her small crush on the boy.

To add gasoline to the flame Jungkook had a similar experience seeing YN, standing under his hyung’s arm in the middle of the sixth floor’s corridor looking so… Breathtaking. Ever since he realized he had a crush on her he… He merely couldn’t find any other way to describe her. She changed so much in the passing years, evolved, grew into herself. He wasn’t expecting to see her and if she paid him enough mind she would notice how shocked and flustered he was. However, preoccupied with the excitement of seeing her best friend again and the time pressure of having to go meet her realtor in just a short while she didn’t. Jungkook inhaled sharply in an attempt to calm himself down and stop the racing of thoughts in his head.

“YN noona!” He exclaimed with excitement and shock lining his voice. “When did you-”

“Last night.” Taehyung interrupted him, dragging YN under his arm to walk closer to the other boy.

“And for how-”

“For good!” He interrupted him again and Jungkook’s eyes widened at the prospect of seeing YN more often because if she was going to stay in Seoul she was most definitely going to hang out with Taehyung and if she hung out with him he could tag along and stare at her all he wanted, admiring her beauty, getting lost in the sweet sound of her voice, the smell of her-

“Hey, that’s not decided.” YN replied, poking her best friend in the side and removing Jungkook out of his daydream.

“For a couple of years at least.” Taehyung explained by quoting her earlier words.

“That’s great.” He smiled at her as they stood right by each other now. “It’s so nice to see you again. You look healthy.” She smiled at his kindhearted comment, not paying it much mind while he cursed himself out in his head for not saying something more personal or meaningful.

“So, noona what are we eating?” Taehyung asked, rubbing her shoulder.

“Nothing, Taehyung!” She scolded him, instantly jumping from under his heavy arm. “I only came by to say ‘hello’ and give you…” She reached into her purse and pulled out a big paper bag. “This.” As soon as she showed them the packageTaehyung’s hands were already on it, discarding the bag and opening the box hidden inside.

“Yes!” He hummed, looking inside to see a bunch of miniature croissants with different toppings and fillings, ones YN always raved about and promised to bring over whenever she was going to visit.

“I hope you like them as much as I do.” She said smiling at the content in his eyes. As much as she hated having to pay for his meals when they ate together she also loved seeing him get excited over certain dishes and simply eat. “Just don’t eat them all in one sitting.” She cautioned him already imagining the stomach ache he would have to endure if he did that. “And leave some for your friends.” She added gesturing to Jungkook’s hungry stare.

“I won’t, noona.” He assured her quickly and closed the box.

“I have an apartment viewing in about…” She glanced at her wristwatch and noticing how late it was already she sighed slightly. “Ten minutes. I’ll buy you dinner next time.” Taehyung pouted sweetly at the sound of her words even though he knew there was no way for him to get out of the studio right now.

“You’ll have to invite us over to your new place, noona.” YN smiled warmly at Jungkook who finally spoke up again. He smiled brightly at her, showing his bunny-like teeth she adored.

“Ah, I work a lot.” She breathed out, imagining how would be hosting the entirety of BTS in a tiny studio apartment because there was no way she could afford anything more if she wanted to live close to her work in Gangnam-gu. At least not yet. “I don’t know if my schedule will allow me to do that.”

“Is that your excuse to get out of treating us?” Taehyung teased her, pulling on the sleeve of her woollen coat.

“How did you know?” She shot right back with a cheeky smirk that quickly turned into a loving smile. “Keep reminding me.” YN wrapped her arm around his back to pat it caringly. “Hopefully soon our plans will align and then I will buy both of you whatever you want.” Both boys smiled with hope glistening in their eyes at her promise.

“Coming!” Jungkook heard YN’s muffled voice right after he pressed on the bell. He swallowed loudly and within seconds she opened the door. Dressed in more of a laid back outfit than he was used to seeing her in - a simple t-shirt, a pair of high waisted beige pants and thinly rimmed silver glasses - she still managed to both knock the wind out of his chest and make him feel underdressed. “Hi! Oh-” Her happy expression faded into a slightly confused one. “I thought you would come over together.” She stepped to the side to let him walk past her and inside the apartment.

“Ah, didn’t Hyung tell you?” He asked, slipping his black boots off as she locked the door behind him. “He had to stay late for dance practice. He said to order without him.”

“No, Taehyung called me already.” Jungkook barely stopped himself from grinning. Taehyung’s last-minute call to YN was part of a much bigger plan. “I meant Jimin Oppa.” She clarified, leaving her keys in the lock. “I thought he would come with you.” Jungkook scrunched his eyebrows, hoping his acting skills were good enough to make his performance believable to her.

“I meant Jimin Hyung too.” He slipped off his jacket and she took it to place it on a hidden hanger in a closet behind her. “He’s still at the studio. I didn’t see Taehyunf-ie Hyung there.” He added.

“Oh. Weird. ” YN frowned in confusion. “None of them said anything in the group chat or anything. I mean Taehyung called me, but-”

“Ah, Jimin must have just forgotten.” He shrugged, playing it off. “You know how he is.”

“I guess.” She nodded before turning to face him. In the thin hallway of her apartment there couldn’t be more than forty centimetres of space between them - an amount that to Jungkook seemed like an unswimmable ocean at this moment.

“So it’s just the two of us until they decide they’ve had enough dancing for the night.” He smiled, feeling the blush creeping up onto his ears and slowly making its way onto his cheeks.

“If they decide that.” She giggled only making him feel warmer in the face.

“So, noona, will you show me around?” He asked in hopes of taking her piercing gaze off him so she didn’t notice his nervous state.

“Yes, of course.” She exclaimed, excited all of a sudden. “So where we are now is my tiny genkan.” She gestured to the small space they stood in - a lowered, tiled area, a little smaller than a square meter. “Here is my wall of closets.” She tapped on the white doors behind her, hiding tons of storage much needed in an apartment as small as this one. “Here is my tiny bathroom.” She walked to the door next to him, switching on the lights to reveal a modern bathroom - something hard to come by in buildings that weren’t newbuilds. “Please don’t mind the toilet paper stacks, I’ve had friends come over for a housewarming party last weekend.” She chuckled, pointing to the surprising amount of toilet paper stacked under the shower. From the bathroom she led him to the main space of the flat. “Here is my kitchen-living-dining-office-room combo.” The room wasn’t big, but it somehow still managed to fit a kitchenette, bar and coffee table, some shelves, and a decently sized couch. “In that nook over there is my bed, you can’t really call that a bedroom, but it’s fine and here- here is my favourite part of this whole place.” YN almost skipped to the large sliding door on the back wall of the apartment. She pulled on it and gestured for him to take a peek inside. “The sunroom!” She exclaimed happily. “It’s dark now, but believe me in the mornings it’s just breathtaking.” Jungkook smiled at the sound of the word.

“Yeah, I bet.” He murmured, glancing over the small rectangular space constructed of mostly windows where YN put up some plants and a tiny table with chairs.

“What do you think?” She asked leaning on the door frame, dangerously close to him.

Truth be told her apartment was everything he expected it to be. Small, but not cramped. Neatly decorated and clean, but not entirely perfect. It didn’t give off a vibe of being creepily overplanned as if taken out of an IKEA booklet. It felt warm and homey, but most importantly it smelled of her which he simply adored.

“It’s nice.” He smiled, looking down at her. “Cozy. It suits you.” She batted her eyelashes, playing shy.

“Thanks.” She muttered before looking straight at him again. “You hungry already?”

“Starving.” Jungkook breathed out with a slight chuckle, letting the tension in his body loose.

“Let’s order then.” She chirped, reaching for her phone to scour the apps for something tasty.

Jungkook’s eyes widened, staying focused on YN’s throat while she downed almost the entirety of her glass. The two of them sat on the carpet-covered floor of her apartment, back resting against her sofa, soft music playing from a Bluetooth speaker in the background, boxes of chicken and fries on the coffee table.

“Drink slower or you’ll get in trouble.” He chuckled, licking his fingers clean from the chicken he just ate.

“This is my first beer.” She shot back, almost choking on the last sip of the fizzy beverage.

“You don’t want it to be the last.” He said in a jokingly warning tone earning an overdramatic eye roll from the girl. “Drinking fast makes you get drunk faster. It was scientifically proven that-”

“Ah, let me do what I want.” She interrupted him, laughing through her words. “If you weren’t Taehyung’s friend I would kick you out already.”

“No, you wouldn’t.” He smirked, hoping for his words to ring true and with the way she smiled at him he was almost certain they would. “Something came to my mind on my way here.” YN leaned her head against her bent leg and hummed, signalizing for him to go on. “Knowing your future is the shittiest feeling of all.”

“Yeah?” She looked up at him curiously, resting her chin on her knee now to see him better. “What’s your shitty fortune then?” Jungkook sighed, letting his head fall back onto the soft cushions of the couch behind him.

“I’ll live my life the way I am expected to.” He murmured. “I’ll show up where I’m needed. I’ll sing when people want to hear it. Dance when they want to see it.” His words carried an unimaginable weight with them. A weight YN imagined would break any other man, but not him. “I’ll get married in my late thirties or early forties, because ‘what even is an idol that’s not single?’.” He chuckled sadly. “And after all that I’ll fade away and- what?” He stopped his reasoning as the sudden sound of her muffled scoff.

“You won’t fade away.” She shook her head and straightened up. Hearing Jungkook say all of that made her heart ache. “You’re too good for that.” She patted his shoulder firmly. “Too cool.”

“You think I’m cool?” He muttered out the question so quietly it got drowned out by YN’s next argument.

“Also you have to create your fate.” She said in a stern tone that Jungkook couldn’t possibly take seriously after hearing her call him cool. “I think I heard that in one of your guys’ songs.”

“Am I cool to you?” He repeated himself.

“Don’t interrupt me.” She scolded him, taking advantage of their age gap. “You can change your life depending on what you do, Jungkook-ah.” She looked into his deep brown eyes and seeing an unfamiliar shine in the otherwise perfect irises she decided to add one more comment to her speech. “Just don’t do anything too reckless.” She rested her hand on his shoulder for a second. “I would hate to watch you getting hurt.”

Jungkook smiled at her, sincerely, with all his heart. Her words gave him hope and courage. He breathed in sharply, showing off his bunny-like teeth in a wide smile.

“All the girls I dated- ah, it sounds like I dated a lot of girls.” He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “All those girls, those moments…” He continued despite knowing she must be a little taken aback by the change in topics. The two of them never talked about their romantic lives with each other for which he was grateful because if he heard of even one boy that wasn’t him hitting on YN he was sure he’d implode. “I thought that was what love feels, but in reality, it might not have been love at all.” YN frowned sadly, her eyes still on his, getting lost in their beauty. “Not true love at least.”

“What even is true love?” She scoffed, breaking eye contact. If she was going to say what she thought of just seconds ago she couldn’t be looking at him. “I’ve never been in love.” She confessed without much hesitation now that she averted her gaze.

“Never?” She simply hummed out an agreement while looking at her feet on the fuzzy rug. “I have. Actually, I still am.” YN smiled, but her gaze remained down.

“Lucky you.” Jungkook traced her movements with caution, not wanting to say too much or too little. This moment was important and he wasn’t going to mess it up.

“Yeah. There might be some luck in my situation.” He was being vague and she easily read it in his voice that he wanted her to ask him more. As new as this situation was - since she never talked to Jungkook about this kind of stuff - it also felt almost natural.

“Are you together?” He stayed silent so she decided upon explaining her question further. “With the girl that you’re in love with.”

“Ah.” He exhaled weakly, leaning his head on the couch again, but keeping his eyes on her. “Not entirely.” YN looked at his blonde hair scattered on the grey cushioning of the sofa. Later her stare travelled to his forehead, his strong eyebrows and then his deep brown eyes that contrasted so perfectly with the lightness of his hair.

“How so?” The corner of his lips tugged upwards as she took the bait he was trying to give her.

“Well, we’re not dating-” His eyelids fell slightly as his gaze went to her lips and then opened back up as it came to her eyes again. “- but we are in the same room.” YN exhaled a slight chuckle and smiled at him sweetly.

“You are a lot smoother than the last time we talked.” She admitted, still hugging onto the leg she had up to her chest. She felt oddly comfortable with his corny confession, taking it as a weak joke of some sort.

“Smooth enough to get you to agree to go on a date with me?” He asked, staying in the same relaxed position. YN shook her head slightly, looking down once more, releasing it might have not been kidding.

“I’m your noona.” She muttered under her breath. Jungkook shifted from his previous spot and shuffled to sit closer to her. At this point YN was sure he wasn’t kidding though she kind of wished for him to be.

“By less than two years.” He said sternly, sitting right in front of her, scanning her face up and down while she didn’t dare to even glance at him.

“Still, it’s-”

“It’s what?” He interrupted her at which she lifted her face, making their eyes meet. The glimmer she noticed said it all.

“Inappropriate.” She seeped through gritted teeth. YN never thought the boy could see her as anything more than his senior, his noona, his bandmates childhood best friend who bought him dinner whenever she came over.

“Pft.” Jungkook scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Says who?” He asked, cocking his eyebrow.

“Everyone, Jungkook.” She declared and raised her finger at him right as he opened his mouth. “And don’t say ‘fuck everyone’!” He shook his head before coming up with a different comeback.

“So stop making excuses and face your feelings.” This time it was her that scoffed.

“Who says I have any feelings for you?” Jungkook felt his stomach turn. He considered getting rejected, but coming face to face with it he wasn’t prepared to take that blow.

“M- my gut.” He stuttered.

“Your gut?” She shot him a patronizing stare. Seeing that look in her eyes angered him and anger gave him a rush of courage he needed.

“Yes. Stop repeating my words.”

“Stop disrespecting your noona.”

“Stop taking advantage of our age gap.” YN sighed breaking the staring contest and brought her other leg up as if to shield herself from him. “If we were in Paris or Madrid or anywhere else you lived while you were working in Europe you wouldn’t think twice about it and you know it. If the roles were reversed and I was older it wouldn’t be a problem either.” He spoke from his heart and she knew he was right. “Why is it suddenly so important when you’re in Korea?” She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to stop herself from blowing up on the poor boy. He wasn’t the one to blame for the norms generally applicable in Korea when it came to dating.

“Because of societal rules.” She uttered out quietly. Feeling the pain in her voice made Jungkook want to be close to her, wrap his arms around her and whisper sweet nothings into her ear, but he didn’t want to cross any lines so he opted for just shifting closer to her. Close enough so the sides of his thighs touched her curled up legs.

“It’s two years.” He whispered, twirling a piece of her hair between his fingers. “Barely two years.”

“To you.” YN murmured, faced away from him.

“And to you?” Her shoulders rose and fell down abruptly as she sighed deeply.

“Stop it.”

“My mom is older than my dad.” He started slowly, now stroking her arm. “By two years too.”

“Is she?” He smiled at the hopeful change in her tone.

“Yeah.” He purred. “And to make it even less socially acceptable she was the one that hit on my dad, not the other way around.” YN chuckled, sending a shiver of excitement down his back.

“So that’s where you get your determination from.” Jungkook hummed in agreement.

“You bet.” YN straightened up, pushing his hand away. With great struggle, she managed to look him in the eyes again.

“Jungkook-ah, I-”

“YN Noona, I like you. A lot.” He interrupted her as soon as their stares met. “And your age was never a factor in me coming to those feelings.”

She stayed silent for a moment after he said that, keeping eye contact and after that short while Jungkook saw her legs drop down as she came into a kneel. Her soft palms made contact with the warmth of his cheeks bringing his lips to her own. His hands instantly travelled to her waist, guiding her to sit in his lap, her legs draped to the side. She teased him by biting on his lower lip lightly, asking for him to open his mouth to her and he did, allowing her tongue to dance alongside his as if they kissed like this a million times before.

“How am I going to tell Taehyung about this?” YN asked after breaking the kiss. Her fingers were tangled in his hair, his hands caressed the bare skin of her back under her t-shirt.

“He already knows.” Jungkook smiled against her lips as he leaned forward to plant a wet peck on them.

“What?” YN looked at him wide eyed and he smiled brighter. Her gaze fell down to the space between their chests as she felt a hint of pinkish lush blossom on her cheeks.

“Did you really think both him and Jimin had to bail last minute, leaving me and you all alone?” Jungkook grazed his nose over hers in an attempt to get her to look back at him again, but it didn’t work. “I told Hyung I was going to confess to you this morning.” Her eyelashes fluttered slowly and he was able to look into her shining eyes once again. “He came up with this plan and even cheered me on.”

“Really?” YN asked in disbelief, wrapping her arms around his neck and resting them upon his shoulders. He liked it, the weight of her body on him, it made him feel strong and needed.

“Yeah, I told him that I liked you a long time ago.” He noticed the questioning raise of her eyebrows, but kept talking as if he didn’t. “Ever since then he’s been teasing me about it, but when I spoke to him this morning he was so serious.” Jungkook rolled his head back exhaling a small laugh at the memory of the conversation he had with Taehyung earlier in the day. The small movement exposed the skin of his neck to YN and her eyes naturally travelled to the surface she never before paid much attention to, but now wanted to shower with not only kisses. “He even gave me a speech about how I can’t ever be mean to you and ruin your guys’ friendship and that I should treat you right-”

“And will you?” She tugged on his shoulders lightly, but he was faster in his reaction. He straightened up and rested his forehead against hers.

“Are you kidding me? Of course.” He spoke in a low, calm voice. “So?”

“So what?” YN smiled, running her fingers through the hair on the back of his head - a motion he already grew to love.

“Are we like a thing now?” He grinned without hiding his excitement. Jungkook wanted them to be ‘a thing’, something, anything, as long as it was him and her.

“Take me out first and then I’ll make up my mind.” She joked, keeping the same smile on her lips. Jungkook leaned forward, pulling her hips closer as their mouth crashed in a quick yet passionate kiss.

“What are we waiting for then?” He smirked into the kiss. “Let’s go.”

“Now?” She asked, pushing his chest away so she could see him whole and make sure he wasn’t joking.

“It’s still early.” He shrugged, bringing his hands to her upper back. “We can fit in a romantic walk by the river and I’ll treat you to a ridiculously expensive dessert after.” YN chuckled at his simple proposition. It seemed so heartfelt, so tempting. She let her hands travel mindlessly from his hair to his shoulders, then neck, jaw. She pulled him in to leave a sweet peck on his hungry lips.

“Lead the way.”

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bestyouuniveristy · 3 years

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How are some ways of keeping yourself motivated and getting daily work done/keeping yourself focused?

I have major depression but I'm highfuctioning but still struggle with motivation and focus.

Hey @artoutofmymind!

Focus is a very difficult topic for me to cover, as I struggle with focus on a daily basis. What has helped me in the past however, is really feel yourself in the moment. Let’s say you have a desk job at some company and you have to fill out paper work. It would be easy to get lost in your thoughts and easily discourage yourself in your own workplace. However, you really have to live in the moment. Really feel what you’re doing and do what you’re doing, better. Instead of getting sucked into any thoughts not pertaining to what you are doing in the moment, ask yourself why youre doing what you’re doing. Not why you’re working. No. Why are you writing that there, why are you copying that piece of paper, why are you organizing your pencils. If you are in the gym, dont let the negative overshadow the good. Ask yourself why you do each exercise and what are the benefits. If you don’t know the answer, then research it. If you don’t want to lose your stamina by looking stuff up at the gym, make a mental note. Think of all the reasons you think you would need that exercise. Or that gallon of water. Or that mile run. Keep your mind busy.

Sticky notes are your best friend! Write down your favorite quotes. Look up some motivational poems. (I’ll write some down for you below). Watch some motivational speeches and write down how you feel about them. Write down some self care reminders like ‘Drink Water’. I guess In a way, your mind is kind of like a stubborn little kid. It’ll keep trying to run around causing mayhem, but you have to keep reminding it to behave over and over again until eventually it does behave on its own. Sometimes you have to distract it with something it’s not used to. Like positivity. So these sticky notes you put up everywhere, read them. And I don’t mean glance at them a few times and then forget they are there. Actually read them every single time, and find the meaning of each one. You know why you wrote them in the first place, but how does each one help you? Write new sticky notes every day. Keep up that positive environment so that the negativity can disappear. The more you feed into the negativity and the depression, the worse it gets.

See, when you’re depressed, your mind has its own agenda. Your heart wants you to be okay and knows that what you’re feeling is unreasonable. Your mind, however, wants you to tear yourself down and hate the world and yourself. We don’t want that. I cannot stress this enough. DRINK WATER. Water lubricates the gears in your mind for smooth sailing thoughts. Which means, it could go either way. You could drink the water and get worse, faster. (Negative thoughts). Or, you can drink water and get better, faster. ( positive thoughts). Fuel your mind with the right type of gasoline. Not just the cheapest or the easiest. Your body is a temple. What you put in it, helps shape your mind and your thoughts. Alcohol is a no. Although a glass of wine a day doesn’t hurt. Healthy eating is a must. I’m not saying go eat a salad for every meal. I’m just saying don’t eat McDonald every day for lunch. Go to subway or a healthy joint near you. Eat fruits and vegetables. Make sure you have enough protein in your diet. If you don’t eat meat, drink a protein shake with your meal.

It’s all about what you want in the long run. It’s not easy to get better and still focus on living and doing living people shit like go to work. It sucks. But what’s a positive to that negative? You’re alive and you have a job and a life that you can live however the fuck you want to so why not be happy. Why not do everything in your power to be that person who just lives. The person who’s not worried what people think, the person who love their life, the person who is excited about new things and new beginnings and positivity. You got this. Like I’ve said before, the climb is hard and steep and tiring, but the view from the top is pretty fucking great.

-Your newest friend,

@feelingsarehar3 ❤️‍🔥

Here are some motivational quotes:

Imagine what’s possible once you stop doubting yourself.

My goal is to progress, not try to impress.

There are hidden blessing in every struggle. (Find them)

Inhale your future, exhale your past.

Growth is growth no matter how small.

Never let your fear decide your life.

A negative mind will never give you a positive life.

You are loved no matter how you feel.

You have been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved.

#fitspo #encouragement #motivation #motivational quotes #positive mental attitude #inspiration #positive thoughts #self care #self care reminder #positivity #teen wolf #relationship #relationship advice

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lavander-yarn · 2 years

Note

2., 4., 10., 11., 14., 23., 35., 42., 49., 51., 88., 90., 91., 94.? feel free to ignore a few if it's too many 😀

Nah, i'll answer them all.

2. If i could meet anyone on this earth who would it be?

When i was a teenager i really wanted to meet d'arcy, really. My highschool friends knew it and supported me with my craziest dreams. Part of me still want to meet her, just like you...

4. What do you think about most?

Sometimes i feel like everything sucks and idk what to do, but then i have few moments when i see a little hope and i want to hold on that. I'm very restless lately.

10. When was the last time you played the air guitar?

Every day lol.

11. Do you have any strange phobias?

Not that strange. I have one to the subway, but it's because of my nightmares. I'm working on that, i have places to go.

14. If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Doing the errands, harassing acquaintances, going to free events.

23. How do you vent your anger?

Using cursing words against the wall.

35. To you, what is the meaning of life?

Is like that quote, you know, whatever thing that keeps you away from suicide. For me is to help a little to my loved ones, and to try to love and forgive myself every day, past, present and future. If i can feel a little glow in the middle of that, good.

42. Do you like the smell of the gasoline?

49. Ever have a rumour spread about you?

Many. I guess there's one around abt me right now... Like, that thing have a month around.

51. Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

Yeah, i mean, who doesn't do that? Later i forget it, and the anger goes away and it doesn't matter anymore.

88. If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

Any asshole man that deserves that.

90. One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Well, first i would wake up my sister, then we could run to see if my parrot is ok, and finally i would call my family on the phone to check if the problem is a universal thing or whatever.

91. You accidentally eat some radioactive veggetals. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Teletransportation.

94. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

90's James Iha (very obvious from me 😅)

♥️ thank you ♥️

Hugs for u! (･ω･)つ⊂(･ω･)

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knight-ingale · 4 years

Text

Chapter 2, Seeing the Rain

A/N: Hey guys, hope you like chapter two! I wanted to write more in this one chapter, but I don’t have the first book with me right now, and I reaaally want Jessica’s quotes accurate, so this will be all until sometime next month! ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*---~---~---~---~---~---~--- *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Despite the unfamiliar noise of rain and wind against the roof and walls of the house you had managed to fall asleep before midnight. You slept much more soundly than you thought you would. Then again, you were much better at adapting to the weather changes during your summer visits than Bella was. All that being said, you were still anxious for the oncoming day as you fell into slumber.

You woke up to the thick, misty fog clouding the world outside the cold pane of your window. It almost looked like the cloudy sky had descended onto the wet terrain of your new world.

Getting dressed was easy since you had set out your clothes the night before. The clothes you had picked were warm, or as warm as you could manage considering your meager wardrobe, and as inconspicuous as you could manage. You weren’t one to wear neon-bright colors to begin with, so it wasn’t difficult. Thinking as you dressed, you picked back up on your train of thought from last night. How much attention would you and Bella attract? Usually, you and your sister’s presence wasn’t something to worry about. The beginning of the year brought new students, no matter what school year was beginning or where. The schools in Phoenix were always crowded and bustling, so two new students wouldn’t turn any heads. But here? Things were drastically different from Arizona. Like Bella had said, everyone here had grown up together for generations. There was already a complex connection between families and social circles that had remained unchanged for years! You almost had to forcibly shake the thoughts from your head as you slipped on your shoes and grabbed your backpack to go downstairs.

You took the short staircase two steps at a time, landing softly at the bottom without falling over. Bella and Charlie were already sitting down at the square table in the kitchen when you got all the way down, both with a plate of fried eggs in front of them with another in the empty spot in between them. You sat down with a small smile and hello before picking up your fork eating in the continued quietness surrounding the three of you. Charlie finished his eggs and stood up from his seat to wash his plate. He turns around at the sink when he’s done to face you and Bella.

“Well,” he says, “I hope you two have a good day at school.” You swallow your eggs and smile,

“Thanks, Dad. Have a good day at work.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Bella says. Despite her thanks, you knew she was less than optimistic. Charlie nods to you both before patting all his pockets and making sure he has everything before leaving. Once he’s out the door, you continue to eat your eggs. You and Bella finish quickly, but Bella decides to stay a little longer. You were already early enough, so you decided waiting a little longer wouldn’t be too bad. Bella sat at the table, peering into the living room as you got up to wash both your plates.

“You ready to go?” you ask, drying your hands off on a towel as you turn around to your sister. Bella breaks her gaze from the pictures on the fireplaces mantel and turns to you,

“Yeah, let’s get going. Don’t want to be late on the first day, right?” Her smile is more of a grimace, but you laugh at her attempt at humor. You grab your bag from the wooden seat as Bella flicks off the kitchen light. She takes a deep breath before opening the door, swinging the barrier open to the drizzling skies outside.

You stepped out to greet the chilly air first, walking out from the cover of the overhanging roof to look up at the downcast sky and the peaks of the tall trees. The light rain on your face was quickly waking you up, the wet air filling your air with rejuvenating energy. Once Bella had locked the door, she hurried her way past you to the truck, pulling you out of your moment. Bella hops in the truck before you get to your side, unlocking the door for you. You climb into your own seat and try to close the heavy door without slamming it, to not much avail. On the upside, the truck was clean on the inside! There were a few faint, mysterious stains on the carpet beneath your feet, but that was all. The inside also smelled nice, like fresh peppermint and a little bit of gasoline. Unfortunately, the truck did have one draw-back, and that would be the roaring engine that nearly made you jump out of your skin. Both you and Bella jumped in your seats, sharing a surprised look.

“Well, a vehicle this old is bound to have a flaw, I guess,” Bella grumbles. You shrug and reach for the radio. To your delight, the practically ancient device was functional! You let the radio play quietly as Bella drives.

A plus to living in a small town, it was pretty easy to find the school. Of course, it’s pretty easy to find since it was just off the highway like almost anything that wasn’t a residential area. The buildings were so vastly different from your school back in Arizona, you almost wouldn’t have recognized it as a school building if it weren’t for the sign. There were no chain-link fences around the property, no metal detectors, not a single cop car. Bella decided to park right in front of the first building labeled ‘Front Office’. You hop out of the passenger side easily, leaving the warmth of the cab for the misty air outside. Bella followed with much more reluctance than you to follow the little stone path up to the doors. You stop with her right before, watching her take an anxious breath before opening the door.

Inside the office was warm and cozy, dressed to be a little waiting room with ugly orange carpet and only somewhat comfy looking folding chairs against the walls. And, for some reason, there were a bunch of plants. Why so many plants? Just set them outside, they’d never forget to water them that way.

You followed Bella up to one of three desks, the one manned by a middle-aged, redhead wearing glasses that were slipping down the bridge of her nose. She looks up at you and your sister with a polite smile,

“Can I help you?”

“I’m Isabella Swan,” Bella informs her. You lean closer to Bella’s side to be in the woman’s line of sight,

“I’m Y/N Swan,” You add. Immediately, recognition sparks behind her eyes.

“Of course,” She says. She turns her chair slightly to her side to dig through a spire of papers. “I have your schedules right here, and maps of the school.” She brings out several papers in each hand, addressing your sister first. When she finishes with Bella, she waves you forward to explain your schedule and draw some paths from class to class. She looks up to both of you when she’s done, “You two have a good day!” You smile back and thank her before turning to leave.

When you get back to the truck, other students were beginning to arrive. You both get back into the truck to follow the line of traffic to the student parking. You finally park and Bella immediately switches off the obscenely loud engine. Bella stuffs all her papers into her backpack before leaning back against the back of the seat’s head-rest, eyes closed and head tipped upwards as she sighs.

“Hey.” Bella turns her head to the side to look at you, “You can do this, Bells. No one is gonna bite you.” She scoffs at your encouragement, but you just grin, “Hey, if they do, you can just bite ‘em back!” Your joke gets her to chuckle. She takes a deep breath,

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

You both step out of the truck onto the black pavement. You have to steady Bella as you hop over the lip of the sidewalk since the nearly trips on it. Before you part ways, you pull her into a hug,

“My first class is in building two. We meet up at the truck at the end of the day, right?” Bella nods in affirmation before letting go. “Alright, you later Bells. Try not to fall on anyone,” you jest mischievously. Your sister rolls her eyes,

“I’ll do my best, later jerk,” she mumbles. You watch her walk away for a moment before turning to make your way to your own building.

Your first class was English, so hopefully, it would be an okay class to start the day off with. You had your hands shoved into your jacket pockets, anxiously fiddling with a gum wrapper you had forgotten about. As brave as you had seemed compared to your sister, someone could assume you to be fearless, which is a total lie. You’re anxious as all get out! Even as you walked to your class, you had anxious butterflies doing karate in your stomach.

Once you made it to your classrooms open door, you noticed how small the classroom really is. Since it was one of the classrooms closer to the middle of the building, there are no windows. The desks were set in clusters rather than rows and the teacher’s desk was in the front corner of the room. The few students who were already there were hanging up their jackets and parkas, but you bypassed them to speak to the teacher, a slightly short woman with light brown hair.

“Um, excuse me,” you ask. The teacher looks up and stares in surprise. “I, uh, the front desk says you need to sign this slip?” You hold it out to her and she grabs it,

“Ah,” she realizes, “you’re the new student, Y/n Swan, correct?” She scribbles her signature in the first-hour box and smiles as she hands it back to you, “I’m Mrs. Hannson, I hope you enjoy this class! I actually have some papers for you, the syllabus and all that.” You nod as she turns to a pile on her desk, pulling out a small and neatly paper-clipped stack of papers. She hands it to you and you smile, nodding along as she explains, “You’ll be sitting over there,” she points to a cluster of desks, “with group three.”

You sat down in your seat, greeting the one person already there, a girl with short, coppery-brown hair and freckles. She looks up at you through round glasses and away from her work, a sketchy drawing of a landscape.

“Hey,” she greets you warmly, “You’re Y/n Swan, right?” You flush. You knew coming to a new school with such a small populace had the possibility of being news, but you had no idea everyone would know you before you even walked through the doors!

“Ah, yeah. It seems like I won’t have to introduce myself since everyone already knows my name,” you joked. She laughs, but it’s more in understanding than humor.

“Yeah, sorry. Small town, big news, you know?” You sigh and nod. “Oh, my name’s Alana by the way, but everyone just calls my Lana.” you talk as more students file into the classroom. That is until loud boys sit in the chair next to you. One is average height and had rusty auburn hair, paired with pale blue eyes and skin pale enough to rival Snow White, maybe even your sister. The other was tall, at least 5’9, and had curly brown hair on top with shorn-down sides. His eyes were dark brown, but they were alight with mischief and boyish energy, matching the pale blue irises of his apparent friend.

“Hey there,” the brown-eyed boy greeted you, “You’re one of the new girls.” It wasn’t a question, more of a statement.

“Yup, Y/n Swan,” you answer.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Cole,” he smiles at you. You politely nod before your attention is turned to the red-headed boy,

“I’m Luke, by the way,” he states, sitting back in his chair. The four of you talk past the bell, only stopping when Mrs. Hannson begins the class.

The next class was History in building four, which went by fairly quickly, as did all your other classes. You were honestly just excited for lunch to hit. You were hungry! According to your schedule, you assumed all students went to lunch at the same time, given there was no labeling of alphabetical or numerical lunches. It seemed so strange. Could all four grades really fit in one lunchroom? Then again, your school back in Phoenix had a much larger population than Forks High School.

The bell to your fourth hour rang, and everyone started to pack up to migrate towards the cafeteria building. Luckily for you, Lana from your first hour was in this class, sociology. The pair of you made small talk about classes and such as you walked outside into the drizzling rain. When you entered the dryness of the cafeteria, you looked around for your sister. You bid Lana farewell and made your way around the large eating area with no actual idea where you were going until you spotted your sister sitting at a table with a strangely large amount of people for her first day.

“Hey Bells!” you call out. Your voice wasn’t loud enough to call any attention to you, but it did seem to catch her attention. She turns her head and looks relieved to see you. Bella gives you a little wave and the girl she was presumably talking to earlier turns her head to look at you. Bella scoots a bit to open up a seat and you sit next to her, leaning forward with your arms crossed on the table to see the mystery girl beside your sister. “Hey there,” you greet with a friendly smile. She smiles back,

“Hey! You’re Bella’s little sister, right?” You nod,

“Yup, that’s me. My name is Y/n, but it seems like everybody already knows that I guess,” you chuckled. The dark haired girl laughs,

“Yeah, it’s gonna be like that for a little bit. New people are exciting in a small town and all that,” she shrugs. You nod in agreement, “Anyways, my name is Jessica, nice to meet you!”

You and Jessica have barely introduced yourselves when you notice Bella looking away from the conversation, positively enraptured by something else. You look over to your sisters line of sight in confusion,

“Bella, what are you looking at?” your confusion dissolves quickly into awe when you see what she sees. Five horrendously beautiful people walk into the room.

#Jacob Black #jacob black x reader #Jacob x reader #twilight fanfiction #twilight x reader #twilight #x reader #x y/n

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