#i tell him its hard !!!!! i have baggage up front !!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

macsimagines · 11 months

Text

Ex-boyfriend & Yandere!Ran Haitani

(This is my best one guys i really like it. Please tell me what you think my ask box is open!!! Ms.Mac)

TW: Stalking, gaslighting, abuse, murder Unhinged behavior

Leaving Ran wasn't easy. He never took you seriously when you kept trying to tell him you were done.

Would still show up at your place demanding sex or somewhere to crash after partying too hard.

Its like he wasn't letting you break up with him. You kept trying to make it clear you were over it and he'd just reel you back in with empty promises and sweet lies.

But then he'd go and be an asshole and smack your ass infront of his friends or call you mean names...flirt with other girls in front of you...

You're done officially. You don't even tell him in person, just shoot him a text and move out of your apartment and out of Roppongi.

You choose to block him on all platforms, change your number, you're literally cutting out every piece of him.

Of course, you're not that lucky. It only takes a week or two but he eventually shows up at your apartment demanding to know what shit you think your pulling now.

A fight ensues, you yell and he yells then you're crying and he really thinks he's slick when he tries to hug you. But you shove him away and tell him you want out of this relationship.

The way he looks at you after that is down right unsettling, but he asks you for sex. He really does ask you for "one more unforgettable night." to seal the deal.

Despite all the red flags in your gut, you cave. Anything to get rid of Ran Haitani forever.

Its great. Its actually some of the best sex of your life. It leaves a giant hole in your chest though.

You tell him no kissing, and he actually looks like he might cry, but if he can't kiss your lips he's kissing every other part of you. He treats you like an actual partner. The way he caresses your body burns from how soft it is and the way he whispers about how much he loves you and can't live without you makes you want to cry.

You just want him to fuck you and get it over with, but, the bastard, decides that for the first time during your last time he'll actually treat you like a lover.

When it's all finished Ran lays with you for an hour. You're turned away from him waiting for him to just leave. "This it then? You ain't got shit to fuckin' say to me?"

Fighting back tears you nod. This was a mistake. You can tell from the tone in his voice.

He leans in real close right above your ear and whispers; "You're never gonna have someone like me, you'll never find what we have again. I'm gonna make sure of it, Y/N."

When he finally goes he slams the door behind him and everything in the apartment rattles with the force of it.

And you lie awake that night in fear and heartbreak because you know Ran meant what he said.

It's months before you feel normal again, you've got this weird pit in your stomach that someone's watching you and at night you can feel eyes while you sleep. Things disappear from your apartment and you're starting to feel paranoid.

But eventually your friends convince you its all in your head. Soon you start going out again and trying to meet people.

Keyword trying. It's always one date and then they ghost you, you can't even get a hookup. Maybe people can tell you have too much baggage.

Finally in desperation you go out to a bar. You've got an itch and you're hoping at least one stupid fling will officially make you move on from Ran Haitani.

You meet someone and you're too drunk to care what he looks like, you don't care that his cologne is so pungent it makes you wanna gag, you don't care that he's not even going to take you to a love hotel he's just got you in an alley, you don't care that it's not Ran.

His lips are on your neck and you close your eyes. You try to picture a handsome man, maybe an idol you saw on TV but that doesn't help at all. You pray to god he just finishes quickly but then thankfully you don't feel his lips on your skin.

For one blessed second you hope he lost interest and just left you alone. But when you open your eyes you see a literal ghost.

You almost don't recognize him with his hair dyed and cut so short but its... Ran Haitani.

He's on top of the man beating him to death. The sickening sound of his fists hitting bloodied wet skin is resonating in the alley way.

You can't even stutter out one word too terrified and shocked at the sight before you. Ran has never looked this way before. Just a snarl on his face and his eyes wide and crazed.

When he's done, after the other man has stopped making any noise, dear god is he dead, he looks at you. His eyes are blood red and unfocused. His whole body is shaking but he stumbles towards you on unsteady legs.

Finally, you get your senses a little too late, You try to make a run for it but he's grabbing you and shoving you against the wall. His bloody hands on either side of your face looking you dead in the eyes.

You get a good look at him, the hair isn't the only thing that's changed he doesn't look like he's slept in weeks.

"That's fuckin' it, Y/N," he whispers, voice cracking, "Thats enough, no more of this breakup shit. You hear me, Y/N? DO YOU FUCKIN' HEAR ME?"

You nod, frantically. Tears streaming down your face. You're shaking too scared to fight back.

"Fuckin' cheating. Never thought you would baby, can't believe you'd do this me." He holds you tight in a hug the blood all over him smearing on you as well.

"My own fault. Should'a stuck by closer. You needed the attention, my own fuckin' fault." he kisses the side of your head and you can barely breath with how tight he's holding you.

"Shaking like a leaf. Fucker scared you. He got what he deserved, touchin' you like that. Pretty baby."

You're shivering and sniffling because Ran is what's scaring you, but you don't dare tell him that with his deranged rambling.

"I'll do better, baby, I'll treat you good this time. No one's gonna take you from me..."

Darkness fills your vision and you realize that Ran just knocked you out. Before you're completely unconscious you hear him say something he's only ever said once or twice.

"I love you..."

#yandere ran haitani #yandere tokyo revengers #yandere ran haitani smut #yandere tokyo revengers smut #ran haitani #ran haitani scenarios #ran haitani headcanons #ran haitani smut #ran haitani x reader #ran haitani x y/n

858 notes · View notes

alanisinstone · 2 years

Text

nate jacobs night shift

cw: fluff, anxiety, kissing, sexual implications

word count: 1.2k

you always hated taking closing shifts. you hated the dark, and how you had to clean up all of the clothes strewn across the store in the process of shoppers coming in and out. you also hated having to walk to your car alone, but you took the shift alone so you would inevitably be facing or have already faced all of these things.. alone.

you picked up the last couple of clothes off of a dressing room floor and carried them to the bin to be put out tomorrow. you were finished, and all that was left to do was lock up. there were men loitering right outside the store, just like pretty much every other night. trying to think of some sort of way to make sure you got home safe, you pulled out your phone. the first thing you saw,

nate: im sorry. i love you. let me know if you need a ride home okay, xo

was that. you sighed..

you remembered the small disagreement you guys had before you left for work. it was actually about the exact thing you needed right about now. he always wanted to go with you, or give you a ride, or make sure you got whatever. and you weren't used to that, thanks to past relationships, so you pushed back and pushed him away. you should be the sorry one. he just wanted you to be safe.

your relationship with nate was complicated. of course you knew about all the shit that went down with maddie and cassie and the play and the aftermath. you were there for it all. sometimes you found it hard to believe that nate actually had real, genuine feelings for you after all that. it seemed to you he had a track record of lying... and toxic relationships. but you were confident in yourself and your ability to handle him and his baggage. you felt close to nate. you had shared things with him that you had never shared with any other man before. that alone was scary, but he was unrelenting in telling you the same. that your connection was something he had truly never experienced before. he confided in you, and told you that the amount of love he felt for you scared him, that he knew he had baggage but he wanted to be better for you and because of you. that he knew he had been a bad person, made bad choices, and been a horrible boyfriend in the past, but he was done with all that, and he was serious about you.

and you believed him. not because he said all that shit, but because you could see it in his eyes... when you were in an argument and they darkened and you could feel the rage emanating off of him, and you could tell that he wanted to hit you, or choke you, or whatever.

and it was terrifying. but he would close them for a second, and open them and then all that rage would be gone. and the nate you knew was back. and he would say, im sorry babe, tell me again what was bothering you and what i can do to fix it. or some shit like that.

you rang him up.

hey..

mm.. hey babe, what's up he sounded groggy, like he had just woken up.

um.. i don't..

what's wrong y/n? did something happen?

no. no. i just.. uh. there's some.. guys. men. outside the store... yeah.

there was silence from his end of the line but you could tell he was smirking. he knew you needed him for this.

so you sighed, i just was wondering, if um.. you would.. come and pick me up. you know.

yeah sure babe, im on my way now you could hear the smile in his voice i love you

yeah whatever you mumbled, cutting your eyes over at the guys outside just hurry up

what was that?

i love you too stupid. you said hanging up the phone.

you sighed, feeling helpless. stuck in this store until he got here to save you. but you didn't really mind because its not like you wanted to get harassed by those men. you waited.

----------------

you heard his truck pull up before you saw it. the hum of the engine put you at ease for the time being. you hurried to the back to grab your purse, and when you got to the front he was already in the door.

is it those guys, is that why you called me? he said looking back at them a little suspicious.

don't be ridiculous, i called you because you're my boyfriend... and im scared you breathed, walking past him and out of the door.

the most the group of men did was stare and probably for the exact reason you called nate for. he is a tall hulking man, why not use that to your advantage.

you opened the passengers side door and climbed up while nate held it, ready to close it for you, then jump in after.

so how was your day baby he asked trying to make the most of your silence.

shitty. you?

always. when im not with you he said smirking

oh, shut it you shifted at the red light.

he looked at you, then at your lips. i missed you baby

i missed you too baby boy you whispered against his lips, pecking them

he placed his hand on your thigh, deepening the kiss. you could feel his tongue sliding around with yours. it was intoxicating. the smell of him. the feel of him. you'd jump on him right now, if he didn't have to keep driving.

will you stay with me his voice rumbled through your ears and down your spine, goosebumps jumping up on your skin.

you knew he was giving you puppy dog eyes but you were looking out the window, actively trying to avoid them.

fine you groaned.

just hurry home it came out more sultry than you intended for.

you couldn't see his face but you could feel his smirk.

hello kiddies 👶

i’ve never done a nate fic before but i AM going to be posting for euphoria ❤️‍🩹🥹

likes, comments, and reblogs appreciated!

requests are OPEN 🕺

okay toodaloo 🏃‍♀️😽😽

divider: @firefly-graphics

#nate jacobs #nate jacobs imagine #nate jacobs x you #nate jacobs x y/n #nate jacobs x reader #nate jacobs fluff #euphoria #euphoria imagine #nate jacobs euphoria #euphoria hbo #euphoria rp #euphoria nate jacobs #euphoria fic #lana.writes 🖍

498 notes · View notes

insomniac-101 · 1 year

Text

I have to say, as a person that grew up watching Doctor Who and eventually lost interest, only to then pick it up as an adult again; the nuance of the portrayal of many of the relationships in the RTD era had to be one of the most surprising discoveries for me upon rewatch.

For a show that is silly ha ha for a large portion of it's existence, the human aspect of the RTD era is something I didn't truly appreciate until i watched it through my adult lens. You have such iconic companions such as, Rose Tyler, Martha Jones, Donna Noble all of which embrace both the negative and positive aspects of what it's like to be human. Their importance lies in their existence, and their ability to grow and learn from their experiences with the Doctor, who in turn is not above being portrayed as a flawed and traumatized person.

His trauma leads him to make decisions that may not always be the best, and the narrative goes out of its way to show that he's not always in the right. They affect his relationships to said companions, and in the end, it's these decisions he makes that lead him to regenerate alone. Because by not sharing the burden of his duties with the people that love him, he punishes himself to never truly heal from all the baggage and he pushes them away.

I believe this is why, although heartbreaking, it only made sense why the 10th doctor ultimately ends up alone.

He tells himself that he is cursed to live a lonely existence. That no one will truly ever understand what it's like to live as the last of his people, and although he may have a point in thinking that rules of his existence are drastically different from that of a human, he is wrong in assuming that we too don't also suffer from the same burden. And so, this is why him ultimately choosing the fates of those around him, against the wishes of those affected, is so unfair (and why he's often punished for it).

Not every human lives the entirety of their life span. It's the very short lives we live (in comparison to that of a time lord, I mean) that help us put into perspective what is truly important. We live our lives knowing that any day may be our last, but instead of wallowing in it, we continue on because that is one of the strengths of humanity: our ability to keep going. We don't forget our pasts, we confront it and carry it with us.

An aspect of humanity that we see him envy through out the run. The slow path, a simple life that is deprived of all the danger he loves but carries the security he lacks. He puts up a front, alienating himself from his companion's lives because he claims they're not worth the time of a time lord but in truth, he can't help but get involved regardless. Because he is not above the basic desire of companionship and love, and by attempting to deprive himself of it (by not being honest about his feelings to himself and those around him) out of an act of self preservation, he is left to wonder what would his life had been had he given in. Would his separation from them been any less hurtful than it was in his final moments: left to watch them live their lives from afar as he returned to a console room empty of the people who loved him? Perhaps, but the undeniable truth is that in never allowing it, he'll never know and that must hurt a lot more in retrospect.

This is ultimately why Tentoo gets his happy ending. Him, being an amalgamation of all the human traits the time lord tried so hard to stunt through out his run. It's this version of himself that is able to be honest with the people around him. He feels fear, making an impulsive decision to end a threat out of the need to protect those he loves. In doing so, ignoring his duty as a time lord to conserve the wellbeing of the universe. He is able to tell the woman he loves that he wants to spend his life with her. Give her the choice to decide what her life would be, even if it didn't include him without the threat of permanent separation. He may have been born out of war and hatred, yet the reason why he exists is because the doctor wished to have more time with that very same woman. Putting his regeneration energy into his hand as a means of not changing into a man unfamiliar to her and potentially losing all of the feelings he held for her in the process. This version of himself, was also born out of the love he had for humanity but what makes him different, is that he embraces it (symbolically and literally lol). Which is why, his time lord self resents him.

His story is a cautionary tale. A reminder of why it is important to treasure the people who come into our lives and to respect their ability to make their own decisions. To live in the moment rather than hide in fear of what the future must bring, because the pain the unknown will bring will never erase the joy felt in those precious memories spent with the people we love.

He realizes this, in his final moments. How much more terrifying it is to be alone than with his beloved friends, in spite of knowing how much it'll hurt to lose them one day.

"I don't want to go"

His final words are a testament of the tragedy/irony of his situation. A man born out of the love he has for humanity, yet he loses his way by not embracing the very thing that once saved him.

#tenrose #doctor x rose #10th doctor #rtd era #retrospective #some rambling #I have to post my thoughts otherwise I will go crazy #might as well share them with the world since talking to my wall just ain't cutting it anymore #tentoo x rose #tentoorose #doctor who #tenth doctor #dr. who

94 notes · View notes

drchenquill · 24 days

Text

Foliè ~ Chapter 5

(Chapter 1, chapter 2, Chapter 3, chapter 4)

The Curse

The world fell silent as the now dead man lay at my feet. My breathing was so loud that it even pushed the woman's voice into the background. I had killed someone. I wanted to scream again, but I couldn't find the strength. I fell to the floor, just as my tears rolled down my cheeks. I tried to force my shaking fingers to clutch the handle of the dagger, to pull it out, but my muscles wouldn't listen. I sat next to him and looked at his lifeless face, my thoughts plagued with guilt, when suddenly he tore his eyes open with a loud intake of breath. I shrieked and fell backwards. What the fuck? As if he'd been replaced, his gray-green eyes turned dark and lifeless again. His dark hair turned back to blond and became sickly. His skin lost its shine. With a grunt, he yanked the dagger from his stomach and straightened up. “Shit, I always forget how much it hurts.” His eyes met mine. He smiled. “So, did you like my little demonstration?”

“Let him feel your anger. I know you'd love to.”

As much as I wanted to, I hadn't sunk to the point of taking my frustration out on someone else.

“I know you want to. I'm in your thoughts, I'm your thoughts”

She was wrong. My thoughts were mine, my feelings were mine. She was just an insect that had nested in my mind. I just had to find a way to kill this insect and then I would be free. “Say, are you all right? You're kind of staring past me, which is very creepy.” My eyes twitched to the now living man in front of me. One thing was true, I was angry, furious, with him. “You're a fucking heartless asshole.” I pressed through my teeth. For a second he looked shocked, but he covered it up with a stupid joke. “Are you flirting with me?” I felt an eyebrow twitch, but I held back.

“Do it. Let out your frustration.”

I shook my head and stood up. I'd had enough. The whine of the machine's alarm could still be heard in the background, and if they had seen me, it didn't take long for them to put the puzzle together. “I don't have time or desire to play games with you. I don't give a shit about what's wrong with you, but one thing is for sure, it is not and will not be my problem, I have my own baggage to carry. If you wanted to tell me, you missed your chance with that fucking show you put on.” I didn't even wait to decipher the chaos of emotions flitting through his dead eyes. I turned away, but he grabbed me painfully hard by the ankle. “Don't…don't go.”

“This is a show, don't think for a second he's serious. This is the punishment I gave him, for succumbing to madness before I arrived.”

“I've been alone for so long… please don't go.” Something stirred inside me, making me pause for a moment. The woman's words and the man's begging made me feel guilty for some reason, but I pushed that feeling aside. He continued to speak, this time accusingly. “Do you know how difficult it is to be accepted anywhere with the way I look? No one wants to be around someone who looks like someone recently murdered them.” he snarled now. “Why do you even look like that?” slipped out of me. Silence surrounded us as these words escaped my mouth. Why had I asked that? Why was I interested in what was going on with this stranger? “You really want to know?”

“No.”

“Yes.”

He smiled and for the first time it looked like a genuine smile. I felt something in my chest again, a thumping, something warm coursing through my body, but I ignored it. “This is the first time I've ever told anyone about this,” he said quietly. “How should I start?” he mumbled. I rolled my eyes and glanced briefly over his shoulders. The city could be seen in the distance, thick clouds of smoke rising from the machine and seeming to engulf everything. I heard sirens, screams. At some point they would have to question my group and they would explain that they had last seen me there and then I could only start praying that they would give me a painless death if they caught me. I turned away again and looked into the man's dead eyes. “Speak,” I said, and he did. “I have been cursed to wear the face of the man whose life I took.”

~~~ Tag List 🥰: @theink-stainedfolk , @frostedlemonwriter

#writeblr #writing #writers on tumblr #writers #writerscommunity #wip #foliè

11 notes · View notes

kiragecko · 1 year

Text

What I REALLY love about Across the Spiderverse is how directly it is aimed at 12-16 year olds, and how it deliberately chooses parents of 12-16 year olds as its secondary demographic.

This movie is designed to be watched with your parents/kids. And it's designed to be slightly uncomfortable for the parents. Which is AMAZING.

(Spoilers below.)

I'm in that secondary demographic. Watching every parent onscreen spend the entire time lost? That was real. And the point where Rio reverses the grounding? And then later when she talks to her husband about it?? You're not supposed to do that! It IS the right thing to do in this situation! What a mess! Her husband has every right to be upset with her - he trusted her to support his decisions and help Miles accept it. Joint parenting relies on that trust. Huge amounts of damage can result from parents offering conflicting consequences! And yet, being able to recognize when love and acceptance is more important - when protecting them is less important than letting your kid be stupid so that they can come back to you after, knowing that they're loved - that's invaluable.

The movie also doesn't say that grounding is evil and a sign that your parents don't care about you! Miles seems to recognize that the grounding is, in fact, fair. He thinks his other priorities are more important than respecting his parents' boundaries, but he doesn't resent his parents for having those boundaries.

If you watch carefully, you'll see that Mile's parents never argue with each other about their decisions in front of him. Instead, their expressions of anxiety that they're messing up are always overheard by Miles or Gwen. 13 year olds don't benefit from their parents burdening them with all their baggage. But 13 year olds DO benefit from recognizing that their parents are trying and there isn't a manual. I'm so glad this movie showed that. (Apologizing for mistakes and acknowledging you mess up is good. Telling them you don't know what you're doing? Usually stressful instead of helpful.)

Capt. Stacy does directly apologize to Gwen and talk about how lost he is. Gwen is being written slightly older than Miles, and that is appropriate behaviour with older teens. Prepares them for adult relationships. A 17 year old isn't as reliant on a parent for survival, which means that their parents being human isn't as scary. (These are generalizations. Individual teens will vary WILDLY.)

We also see Miguel, Peter, and Jess as parents, soon-to-be parents, and/or mentors. I wish we'd been allowed to see a bit more, but Peter also spends all his time on screen unsure about what he's doing, and Jess and Miguel seem to lose people they care about because they aren't able to show that flexibility. (We'll see what happens with Jess and Gwen next movie. And hopefully we'll see more about what happened to Miguel.)

None of the situations shown are good for the parents' pride. None of them leave the parents in the audience excited for THEIR chance to make those decisions. None of them provide the easy answer of 'this kid is making the right choice, so your decision is obvious.' Miles is limiting his future educational opportunities! Something he cares about greatly! Gwen is getting into situations where she MIGHT BE MURDERING PEOPLE! Capt. Stacy has been watching her fall apart for quite a while, and now he knows why. Of course he doesn't want her to be Spider-woman!

The message for parents throughout the movie is 'teenagers need to be able to make choices for themselves, even if they might be are bad choices. You need to transition to providing advice and support, rather than the boundaries they needed when they were younger.' It's a hard but good message, and I appreciated it a lot.

#across the spiderverse #into the spiderverse #spoilers #parenting

52 notes · View notes

lovelywooz · 2 years

Text

Kim Jungwoo - Enough

Hope you guys enjoy ! Not enough people write for Jungwoo so I only feel a little bit bad that most of my writing will probably be about him teehee! If you have any requests or would like to sat hi just send me a message and I’ll reply when I can :) otherwise please look forward to my next postings when they happen!

Word Count: 2.1k

Warning: This is VERY angsty. Mentions of past toxic and mean partners. Hurt-Comfort. All that good stuff.

Not comparing yourself to others is hard. But not comparing yourself to your immaculately perfect boyfriend? That is just plain impossible. You couldn’t possibly measure up.

*******************************************************

When you look at your boyfriend, it’s easy to tell why you love him. His laugh is contagious. He can brighten up a whole room with just his mere presence. He’s responsible and the hardest worker you’ve ever seen. And on top of all that, he is drop dead gorgeous. His delicate yet powerful frame compliments his fluffy hair and soft face. His tall stature doesn’t stop him from bending down uncomfortably just to rest a head on your shoulder. Simply put, he’s a total catch by anyones standards. And you’re so lucky to have him.

When you look at yourself, it’s hard to see the same value. Staring into your sullen eyes in the mirror, on nights like these you can’t help but wonder what he sees in you. How could someone so incredible really stay with someone as mediocre as you? Every day is like walking on eggshells, thinking endlessly on what to do to keep his interest and berating yourself when you do something that might be annoying. It’s a lot of effort to keep up the mask every day but if that’s what it takes then that’s what it takes. If he knew how much baggage you were carrying he would run away and never look back. You wash your face and try not to think about the way your fingers brush over a few forming blemishes on your skin.

You’ll never feel good enough for him.

You make your way downstairs to the dining room, adjusting the huge sweater draped over your frame on the way down. Its Jungwoo’s of course. You just couldn’t resist the idea of having his smell swathed around you and he didn’t seem to mind. You wished you could even be half as comforting to him but you doubt that. Sitting down at the dinner table, you look over the many steaming side dishes scattered about.

It was Jungwoo’s turn to cook dinner tonight. You’ve been trading off every other day as of this month. That way if he didn’t enjoy your food anymore he would only have to eat it for a few nights a week and he wouldn’t be burdened cooking for both of you every night. He’s probably so tired after work and you learned from a previous partner that if dinner isn’t consistently on the table, they would go eat dinner with someone else.

You hope that your little arrangement is a good enough compromise for Woo.

Your mind wanders back to this morning when you asked what he had in mind and he insisted he cook korean food for you. “I miss my mom’s cooking sometimes. I’m not nearly as good as her but… I really want to make something extra nice for you sweetheart”. He looked deep into your eyes, as if searching for something you couldn’t quite figure out. “Okay babe sounds great” you say, absentmindedly breaking eye contact while fixing your outfit in the mirror. You wear it all the time and yet it feels like it doesn’t look as nice as it used to.

You recall the time an ex of yours told you, “you’re too clingy in the morning, just leave me the fuck alone and do your routine and I’ll do mine”.

You don’t say anything more so as not to disturb Jungwoo while he brushes his teeth and fixes his fluffy hair. You want to reach out and brush your fingers over it so badly the way you used to, but you decide it would probably just piss him off. You gave him a short kiss before heading downstairs and out the front door, leaving him standing alone in your shared bathroom.

Jungwoo’s hands fall from his hair to the counter as he hears the door firmly shut. He wipes the mist from his eyes and tries to stop biting his nails before making his way out the door as well.

“… Well it’s not gonna jump onto your plate by itself sweetie”. Jungwoo broke you out of your thoughts with a weak laugh.

“Oh yeah. Sorry ha ha!” You move your chopsticks towards the dakgalbi thats wafting an irresistible aura and grab a few pieces to set on your small dish of rice. “I’ve been spacing out a bit lately.”

“You’ve been spacing out, a lot, lately actually.” Jungwoo clears his throat and stands up a bit from his seat to grab some kimchi. “Sorry. That came out weird... I’m just a little… well I’m worried about you.” He shoves the food in his mouth with gusto then opens it back up to regulate the temperature and swallows after a while. Leaving a very uncomfortable silence. He suddenly sets down his chopsticks and sits ramrod straight.

“I’m worried about us”.

You nearly choked on the rice you had only just started chewing.

“I didn’t want to do this now. I’m sorry I just can’t wait any longer I’ve been so worried lately”. He picks his hands up from the table almost confusedly and then brings them down to his knees, rubbing them quickly. He brings them back up in a matter of seconds though, in favor of running his hands through his hair fervently. His eyes are shifting anywhere but yours. All the habits he shows when he’s most nervous. “Did I do something wrong? Because you just don’t seem as happy to see me lately and, and I feel like, every time I compliment you or kiss you or touch you or anything you just”, he swallows heavily in an attempt to keep his voice from quivering, “You just, hate it. Like you barely even look at me anymore. I thought maybe it was just an off day or two for you, but it’s been weeks now”.

You open your mouth to speak, to offer him some explanation that would hopefully make it all better, but are pointedly interrupted by him. “No- I’m not done”, he stands up from his seat at the table and paces around for a moment before turning to face you directly, “I have to know. Don’t sugar coat it”. He looks up at the ceiling, takes a deep breath, and asks a question you couldn’t have prepared yourself for.

“You don’t love me anymore, do you?”

What. How could this have happened? The love of your life, in tears in front of you, because he thinks you don’t love him anymore? Him. In all his perfection. In all his kindness and intelligence. The man you’ve obsessed over night and day for years, finding a new detail to love about him every week. Of course you still love him, you’ve never doubted it for even a second. How could you have possibly made him think any differently? You’ve been controlling your actions so carefully so as not to disturb or annoy him. Where could it have gone wrong?

You then remember all the times you’ve said no to dates recently because you didn’t “feel like going out” when in reality you felt too guilty to let him waste even a bit of his hard earned money on you. The times you’ve skipped over romance movies and tv shows he suggests to watch together because they remind you you can’t offer him the fairytale love he deserves. All the nights he’s gently slid a hand up your thigh in bed and you pretended to be asleep because you felt like your body wasn’t pretty enough. Not calling him on the way home from work this week because you’ve been bawling your eyes out on the drive home in fear of losing him.

Oh god. The awful realization hits you all at once.

You’ve been so worried about holding him back. About hurting him. About your love not being enough. So focused on ‘fixing’ every insecurity in a desperate attempt to prove your worth to yourself and to him. So mixed up inside all of that, that the love you’ve been giving him all but dried up. And you upset him regardless. You failed.

“You’re not saying anything damn it why are you not saying anything?!” He is full on sobbing now when you come back to reality. “I love you so much. I don’t want anyone else so just please don’t leave me. I don’t know what I did to push you away but I’ll do anything to have you back. It’s only you. It’s only you…” His desperate pleading trails off as the scalding hot tears stream heavily down his face.

The tears have started in your eyes now as you finally speak. “Jungwoo… I love you so much. I love you just as much as I ever have. I’m head over heels for you. I never meant to make you feel this way I am so, so sorry.” You stand up from your chair as well and walk so slowly towards him. “The truth is, I just- I-“ you’re floundering against the tightness in your throat. Why is this so difficult?

“I feel like I’m not enough for you.”

He looks up from his arms. Oceans still rising underneath his eyes.

“I have so much baggage. From experiences and relationships that I’ve been too scared to tell you about. I just didn’t want to chase you away when you found out how messed up I am. I’m so scared to love because I don’t know how to do it correctly and I’m scared that I will create something that only hurts you. I still can’t even fathom how you could love someone like me. I’ve been agonizing all this time trying to be the best partner for you but I still can’t even do that right. Someone as perfect and beautiful as you deserved so much more than me.” You move a hand up to wipe his teary eyes, not realizing how much closer you are now than when you started. “So I hid everything. And pretended like it never happened. I decided to hide at first and maybe open up later but the years just caught up to me and the stakes grew higher and higher as I saw how amazing you are and fell so far in love with you that the idea of losing you because of my incompetence with love was just not an option anymore.” At some point he must have put his arms around you, because you register his comforting scent all around and feel your forehead land against his chest so softly as if it were a feather.

“How long, have you been feeling this way?” His voice is hoarse and soft from crying but he seems to have gained some control over his tear ducts. “I mean like- how long has it been building up inside?”.

“I don’t know. It’s been much worse lately. I’m so sorry Jungwoo.” Your answer will have to suffice for now because your throat is aching terribly from holding back your tears. You’re the one who hurt him, how could you possibly be letting Him comfort You? Once again you feel like you’re bringing him down. You can hear the harsh words and brutal truths from your previous partners nipping at your mind again. Only this time, his voice is there to break your spiraling.

“I forgive you. I know you didn’t mean to hurt me. But there’s one thing that you should hear. If nothing else.” He brings you out of his arms to look him in the eye, making sure that you are holding his gaze by placing one hand on your cheek and the other on your shoulder. You’re expecting him to be so angry with you. This is the part where he leaves you forever. You’ve neglected him. You’ve inconvenienced him. You’ve ignored him. And-

“I don’t care what they told you about yourself. Whoever they are. I fucking love-“ his voice breaks in his sincerity, “I love you. I love everything about you. They way you love is perfect just the way it is. You’re my favorite part of life. And if this is something that we have to work on, then we will work on it together. We will get through this. But we can’t do that if you don’t talk to me. You have to let me in. I’m here to help you now. I’m not like them.”

Your body has a physical reaction to his words. They shoot up your spine like an electric shock and land right where your heart is. Never before in your life have you heard someone talk about you with such conviction. You can feel some part of your emotional walls crumbling away. The way he holds you like a treasure. The way he looks at you with more devotion than you can even fathom. Suddenly the voices of your exes get quieter.

“I love you so much sweetheart. You don’t have to be perfect. All you have to do is be yourself. You will Always be more than enough for me.” He presses his soul to yours in the form of a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“I love you too Woo, I love you so much.” The dakgalbi is cold, but your hearts are so warm. In this moment you know for certain now. As long as you have each other,

Everything is going to be okay.

223 notes · View notes

joifee · 7 months

Note

Hello joifee I am once again here to ramble about my ideas!! :3

Ive been working on a little spinoff for eal, like a little "what if jimmy and fwhip found each other after the world ended" scenario.

Gem and fwhip having been living by themselves for about a year or two when they find jimmy. Or when he passes out in their front yard. But unfortunately he doesn't remember anything, even fwhip, because he's been away from the water too long, and now they have to figure out a way to get his memories back.

Putting him around water helps but it's a very slow process. And the whole time fwhip is just suffering. He's happy jimmy is back and alive, but they can't really pick up where they left off. (Plus they both have baggage and trauma from the world ending) fwhip just doesnt feel comfortable doing anything romatic if jimmy cant remember ya know? But he is scared to qnd does have to resist the urge to be casual affectionate a lot because of it. He really misses his orchid but has to hope they can get him back :(

Gem hates seeing what jimmys memory loss is doing to both of them, and gets really determined to help them. She starts studying magic again, and tries to find spells or something to help jimmy get his memories back faster. She also researches any magic that helps with severe pain/healing, because all three of them suffer from phantom/chronic pain, damaged limbs and a whole list of other medical and mental issues (jimmy living in the woods made his so much worse lol). Fwhip jokes about her becoming a doctor of sorts

Jimmy is just, really confused for the first few months. And every new thing he remembers doesn't help. But he can tell he and fwhip were more than friends before (he still gets butterflies around him <3) he doesn't know how close he was with gem before the memory loss, but he figures they weren't strangers, since she's working so hard to help him. All he remembers at the start is his cat, but that's because normans been following him around the whole time. Norman kinda becomes a constant actually, when jimmy’s memories get all scrambled and he's not really sure what to feel about fwhip

This story does have a happy ending!!! Maybe they finally get married once all of jimmy’s memories are back <3 that's all I have for right now but I'm sure I'll come up with more later hehe

One good thing about my current insomnia sure is that i was able to see that before I attempt to sleep! NGHHH DELICIOUS DRAMA gosh that just hurts so well like the happy moment of "omg my orchid is alive!!!" and "oh no he doesn't remember me at all" is just too good. Like the pain of longing to go back to what they had before but also then the fear that it wont be the same

also fwhip just pushing his desires and feelings aside to aid jimmy, because he knows that this is more important like its so important jimmy heals from his time and the apocalypse

Gem just being a hero but then i figure she also just misses jimmy in a way of a piece of her former life coming back. Because i can imagine while she didn't lost a lover, she sure did loose a friend which also hurts - considering all the other people they lost as well.

norman is just the best cat and genuinely happy that he sticks to jimmy. gosh i cannot imagine what happened to jimmy in those two years being probably very confused about everything.

ALSO YES HAPPY END AHHHH SUCKER FOR THAT also genuinely fics with marriage in the end - gosh i love them so much

I shall tell you one of my new ideas soon when i rested up a bit! But its empires season one x impulses dwarfen empire; current ships in my head gemximpulse, scwhip and maybe flower fwhimmy

#joifeeramble #joifeeautalks #ren just has the best ideas ever #you are just one of my favorite writers #genuine

12 notes · View notes

signalhill-if · 1 year

Text

The Veterinarian - Short Story

To celebrate Test Run going into early access, I'd like to share last month's short story with you folks. I'm also just really excited to share it in general. Here's how Doc met one of the other cast members... Word count: 1.6k

It was a warm Tuesday evening in mid-May, the light pushing its way in through the window was starting to wane, and a young veterinarian was manning the desk at his newly founded medical practice. A powder blue typewriter sat in front of him, its keys rhythmically striking the page as he typed. His handwriting was practically illegible- it wasn't something you needed to learn in order to set a broken leg or inject into a vein. And a photocopier was too expensive anyway. So his funding requests (charity requests, really) would have to be copied by hand, letter by letter, ten or twenty or fifty times.

Today was quiet- even with a price tag of free, not many people were aware of his practice. Sometimes there would be days of silence, with no patients in sight. But the monotony of the rapid thunks against paper was broken by a creaking sound on the other side of the room. The front door. Its hinges were rusty. This place used to be a butcher's shop before the raids drove it out of business. Nothing had been replaced, just scrubbed to within an inch of its life.

Emil's eyes flicked up from his work to watch the approach. The door swung slowly open, and a young man hobbled in from the warm wind outside. He cut an interesting figure- wobbling slightly on one leg, his body long and sinewy, his face mostly hidden by a shock of blonde hair. There was lipstick smeared down his chin. His outfit was mostly obscured by a rough-spun shawl draped over his shoulders, but under it Emil could see a hint of a red slip and fishnet stockings. The fact that he was wearing heels made his unsteady gait even worse.

"I'm afraid I'm a little worse for wear, doc," the man muttered. There was a nervous laughter under it all, like he couldn't contain his irreverence for even a moment. "You don't charge, right? I can't really afford it."

Standing up from his chair, Emil approached the limping man. His voice was tinged with concern. "What happened?"

"You should see how the other guy looks," the guy muttered, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "I'm... not doing so hot. I came here cause Tomas said you deal with people like us."

It had only been a few months, but the people had already started to blend out into stories. Remembering a single name like that would be like remembering a single letter of a novella. Context clues would be necessary. "People like who?" He rested a hand on the man's back to start leading him to one of the cots.

"Queers." Oh. The word coming from this man's stained lips was weighed down with baggage that Emil could sense but not understand. "Boys who wear dresses."

The young man allowed himself to be led over to the cot. His leg was certainly broken, though not badly. He had bruises forming on his arms and upper thighs, and one on the left side of his face. Not in any recognizable pattern, at least not without further inspection. He must have been beaten, kicked, maybe by a group. "What's your name?"

There was a pause before he responded. "Yvette." It was hard to tell if it was fake, or if he simply used enough of them that he had to pick which to use. Probably the last one.

As he lowered himself onto the bed, Yvette inhaled sharply and gripped the metal frame with an unsteady hand. "Jesus, doc, I think it's broken..."

"I think so too." Emil kneeled down next to him, his hands tentatively grazing against the fishnets. "I'll need you to remove the stockings, though. With minimal movement. I need to splint it so it will heal correctly."

"Oh my," he muttered, a smile flickering across his lips. The opportunity to jeer at Emil was overriding whatever pain he was in. Normally, I'd expect men to take me to dinner first! Or pay me, at least."

Emil clenched his jaw. He wasn't going to let this phase him. Not even as his cheeks flushed and he averted his eyes. He had to make this interaction normal at all costs. "If you don't mind me asking, what happened to you?"

"Sometimes when a guy sees a pretty girl, he just can't help but drag him into an alley and beat him half to death. Hormones." He said it with such nonchalance. This wasn't unexpected for him.

What was unexpected was the way Yvette hiked up his dress enough to start peeling the fishnets down his thighs. Not enough to be explicit, but a clear invitation. Look, if you'd like. Emil was sure to avert his eyes after catching a glimpse of red lace.

"I'll just be a moment... I need to fetch a splint." Standing up bolt straight, Emil rushed back to his office. Yes, that was where he kept most of his medical supplies. It was also an enclosed space away from this patient. And he needed that right now, if only for a moment.

Bracing his arm against the wall, he took a deep breath. His eyes caught his face in the mirror hanging on the wall. His cheeks and softly freckled nose were flushed, and a bit of sweat was accumulating on his brow. He'd been running this clinic for only a short while, and he felt utterly unprepared to deal with even the most remotely difficult of patients.

A deep breath. He ran his fingers through his crop of dark hair. Unphased. He was going to be unphased.

After collecting his supplies (and himself), Emil stepped back out into the clinic. The patient was reclining on his cot, the pain still evident but not nearly writhing in it like a lot of folks would be. Maybe on opiates? Such a thing wouldn't be uncommon with these lower-city genderfuck types. Take an upper to party, a downer to relax after all that partying, and another upper to keep from falling asleep... and on. Or maybe he was just really good at hiding it.

"You're lucky, the fracture is quite minimal. You'll be up on your feet again in just a few days." Emil quickly set to work wrapping tight cloth bandages around Yvette's leg, starting right at the ankle and moving upwards. "Until then, you shouldn't put too much weight on it or do any strenuous exercise."

"That's horrible," Yvette complained with a hint of a grin. "However will I live without my daily hikes? What about the weightlifting contest on Monday?" Lying there, half propped up on his arms, swimming in his shawl, he looked like a model out of a fancy old painting. Something you'd see on auction in one of those upscale shops in The Heights.

Soon, Emil had finished applying the splint. He ran his fingers over the handiwork, feeling the shape of Yvette's calf under his fingertips. And then he stood up. "That should heal well. I'm afraid there's very little I can do for the bruises, but you don't seem to have any other fractures."

"Thank you so much, doc." He overpronounced every word, holding out a dainty hand with chipped red nail polish. Beckoning. "Come here, let me thank you properly."

Reluctantly, Emil stepped closer. Close enough for Yvette to grab his wrist and pull him in all at once. In half a second he was leaning down with his hands planted on the frame and the cot, his face next to the patient's. The young man's lips grazed his cheek, leaving a delicate kiss. In a hushed tone he muttered, "I wish there was something I could do to repay you for helping me out like this..."

"I don't accept payment for my services." The flush was coming back to Emil's cheeks. He was trying desperately to stay professional.

Yvette's lips got even closer to Emil's ear as he muttered, "How about if you ever need my services, they're free of charge?"

Emil didn't need to question what kind of services he meant. He straightened up, his face hot. "If you need a place to stay while that leg heals... my beds are open until a higher-priority patient needs them." Both of them glanced around the room in unison, remembering that they were completely alone, with two other cots unoccupied.

The next few days were quiet as well. The practice was new, after all. There were periods of relative peace, and periods of intense business. In truth, Emil had hoped it would get busy once Yvette showed up. It didn't.

He wasn't quiet, either. They spoke about his concerns, about how money was tight and clients weren't going to be interested in him for weeks until the bruising got better. They spoke about the city they'd grown up in, how different everything was from their youth. They spoke about work, with Emil trying his hardest to pretend he wasn't interested in this particular topic. And they spoke about each other's bodies, a week or so later, lying next to each other in the warm embrace of Emil's bed.

Running his fingertips along Yvette's side, feeling the bone just under the skin of his hip, Emil muttered, "I don't know how you convinced me to do that. It should go without saying, but sleeping with a patient isn't very professional."

"It was inevitable," Yvette teased. "I always get what I want, doc."

"So what do you want now?"

Yvette paused for a moment, his eyes fluttering shut. His hair was splayed out on the pillow, his makeup still smudged and never removed. "Right now, I want a glass of wine, a massage, and a nice relaxing bubble bath. In the future... I'd like to be a friend, not a patient."

Sighing and letting himself sink down into the mattress, Emil muttered, "I guess if you always get what you want..."

#i hope y'all like this ahhhhhhhh #i wrote this over a month ago but i still love it so much #these two.......... good characters #short story #ch: doc #ch: yvette #signal hill

24 notes · View notes

philtstone · 1 year

Text

one line, any fic

rules: pick any 10 of your fics, scroll somewhere to the mid point, pick a line, and share it! Then tag 10 people.

i was tagged by my beloved @firstelevens many weeks ago and have finally gotten a chance to do this! i actually dont think i know 10 people on here but for what its worth @birdhapley @foolgobi65 @ewoktreehouse @flyinghome-againstthewind @ygrittebardots @sennenrose @rebellconquerer and @tllgrrl please feel free to have fun with this!! anyway here goes, picked mostly at random because i didnt know where to start so there’s definitely some recency bias at work here ...

hopeful (mcu)

“Hey!” Sam shifts forward, hands aloft, and pins Bucky with another look. He looks mulish, a strange cross between scared and pissed. “First of all, let’s all speak English so Sam can understand. Second, it is the ass end of midnight. No Russian catfights allowed after eleven.”

like the wild geese (mcu)

“You won’t vibe with their political drama,” Bucky says, rocking his head back and forth and picking up the orange juice bottle where Sam had earlier slammed it into the kitchen counter, peering into it with vague interest. “I’m a weirdo commie bastard. I don’t think the greatest minds of Earth are coming together on this one, Sam.”

heavily, the low sky raining (anne of green gables)

“Eat,” says Marilla. Then she says, “now see here, Anne Shirley. There’s always something to do. You can either figure it out and do it, or you can sit around feeling sorry for yourself.” She pauses, for the first time looking rather unsure of herself, and then puts one arm around Anne’s shoulders in a well-practiced motion. “You’ve always been a bright girl, Anne. Matthew said -- well, we both knew you’d be up to some real important things, one day. Sometimes it just takes a little longer to do the figuring out, if that makes sense.”

when the weather gets hot (outlander)

“I dinna think faery queens fart in their sleep, Sassenach.”

in the deep forest green (outlander)

There are streaks of silver in her hair that glimmer almost invisibly where the light from the window catches them. And there is something grounded about her, earth-hewn and solid and unchangeable, that had not existed in the nineteen year old girl who once told him she loved him.

come the clear clouds of summer (bbc’s the musketeers)

“Domesticity,” says Aramis, with twinkling eyes, himself only newly acquainted with the word, as the distinctive soldier-marching tones of Madame d’Artagnan paint a vivid picture of exactly how the good Captain will suffer for his forgetfulness.

just to hear the nightbird singin’ (star wars)

“I would ninety-nine percent rather be kissing your neck than driving right now, Leia. Happy?”

She ignores the use of her given name, which precludes Han’s recent and irritating ability to preternaturally know when something’s wrong with her. Nothing’s wrong, Leia thinks. Outside of like, the obvious -- but that’s been wrong for a few years now, and anyway, Luke’s in the same boat. They’re all in the same boat. Van. Whatever.

summertime (mcu)

“Knives on a good man, I mean.” Her friend Emily in high school (she wonders what has happened to Emily, Now) had all these elaborate fantasies about bad boys with switchblades and hearts of gold. Sarah doesn’t think Bucky falls into the bad category much. Domestically competent partner with heart of gold, she amends. And maybe some baggage.

and there’s a keepsake my mother gave me (mcu)

“I’m very clearly not trying to ambush you,” says Gamora, padding the rest of the way out of the hall’s shadows and standing in front of Nebula, tall above her. Her hair is loose, spilling over her shoulders, her movements similarly fluid. Nebula’s mods can pick up the clinging scents of the abandoned party on her sister, the sweat and leather and fruity cocktail and hard tequila that Rocket calls child’s play, and something of Quill’s terrible cologne. She scowls.

love, squeeze, don’t tease (mcu)

“It’ll be fine, Sarah,” she tells the droopy shapes of trees flanking the path in a low-pitched, poor imitation of said brother, “we got this aaall sorted. Just get this top secret magical object past some crazy mercenaries, the sworn enemy of the Wakandan Royal Guard, a bunch of blown up GRC checkpoints and the whole-ass swamp. No ma’am, you haven’t a drop of miss magic in you. Plain as your mama’s grits since birth. Now you’re playing secret agent and talking to a giant wolf in the middle of the dark.”

10 notes · View notes

guiltysungho · 2 days

Text

— bad idea right ?!

genre : tags. fluff, brother's best friend, enemies to lovers (?), teasing, slightly suggestive, sex mentioned

pairing. brother’s best friend!han dongmin x gn!reader

wordcount. 1825

a/n. i hope y’all like this, its not proofread cause it should be fine lol, its a bit more fluffy than pt1 also yk longer. here’s part one if you even care.

Last night in Italy and you were starting to genuinely wonder why your brother had brought you along on the stay. Most nights he would just leave you alone to enjoy the scenery with his girlfriend, and you had no interest in partaking in that experience, so you would end up with Dongmin. Going out to enjoy the night life with him felt unthinkable in the first couple night but the prejudice you had of him was starting to wear off.

After spending a few nights in each other’s company, you couldn’t just say you hated him anymore, he wasn’t really hateable as much as you hated to admit it. He was admirable if anything, you’d find yourself opening up to him so easily whenever it was hard to fall asleep, just talking about anything and everything. In some ways he pushed you to talk, like he could see all the baggage of thoughts weighing on your mind and wanted to help you unpack, he would ask simple questions like why, how come and you tell him all about it.

It was an odd case, two weeks ago you were sure you hated his whole essence but somehow, he’d become someone who listened to your worries, when you didn’t even know you had worries that needed to be heard. You couldn’t help but be cautious, because of the things you knew, you’d never truly open up as much as you wanted. He’d always be attentive either way, his tired eyes fixed on you as he stayed beside you on the bed resting his head in his hand, nodding every now and then. Your eyes would sometimes meet, and he would give you that lazy smile, such a dreamy smile.

“What?” you’d ask annoyed by how easily the expression made you shy away from his gaze.

“I just like listening to you, can I not smile?” he laughs at your sudden change in tone, you roll over away from his face before responding.

“Keep it to yourself” you turn off the lamp beside you, refusing to let him see the dumb smile on your face.

Once again you were stuck in the hotel room with him, only this time would probably be the last when you’d go back to your usual lives you knew it would be over and you were fine with that, you couldn’t afford to fall for him anymore if it would up in heartbreak and you knew it would.

“Get up, we’re leaving” he grabs a cap before heading for the door, looking at you expectantly, “We are not spending our last night in here. I promised to take you out remember.”

Rolling your eyes at him you stand up, silently agreeing to it all, a lopsided grin grows on his lips as he places his hand on the back of your neck pinching you making you lift your head up to cover your neck from his touch, giggling as you run away from him.

It would be a waste to not go out in the night at least once while you were in Italy, while you were with him.

You look at the machine he displayed in front of you with a show of hands, it was a small vespa moped that had been well used to say the least, listening to him explain about how he had rented it out for the trip and that it was safe, he had used it.

“It’s safe for one person, I know that for sure”

“So I should die? Dongmin seriously… I’m not getting on that” your whining barely registered to him, you look up at him with an annoyed pout as he places the helmet on your head leaning in closer to buckle it under your chin. He makes sure your eyes meet to give you a sweet smile to reassure you.

“Just hold on tight, I promise you’ll be fine, okay?”

And so it was done, you sat behind him on the scooter with a firm grip on his tshirt, he got his helmet on before taking your hands, pulling you closer to wrap your arms around his waist. You might have squeezed his intestines to paste, during the first five minutes of the drive but he didn’t mention it, he just brought your attention to the scenery you were missing out on with your head hidden in his back. Once you did look it put you at ease, the beautiful sunset on the vineyards the type of view you’d only ever seen in movies.

You rested the side of your head on his back, still holding on as you watched the beauty unfold before you, the historical architecture, the fruit trees holding on to the plump spheres of vibrant colours, you didn’t know where he was taking you, but you were already enjoying the ride. That was until the ride stopped, or should you say the scooter broke down, three final huffs and it was dead, he turned back to you with a grin on his face ready for your scolding.

“It was obvious at death’s door, I can’t believe this” he got off first before helping you off, taking off your helmet just as he had put it on, eyes meeting yours before he spoke.

“Trust me”

As hard as it was to just blindly follow him, you just did there was no where else to go. You were in a small seemingly empty town in the south of Italy with a broken down vespa, you would be fine from here.

It wasn’t a long walk till you realized where this was going, the neon lights flashing at the distance told you all you needed to know, you try hiding your smile turning away from his sight, but he caught on, he already knew you would like it, and the more you got closer the harder it was to stay indifferent. It was a big fun fair right by the dock, the ocean view was barely visible in the darkening sky, but the cool breeze was all you needed.

“Cool.” You shrug glancing at him with a big smile on your lips as you looked at the attractions marvelled by the variety of rides, completely overjoyed.

His gaze lingers on the happiness across your face, it was a sight he’d never seen, he knew he liked your smile but what he was feeling was beyond that, he wanted this happy face to last, like he would do anything to keep you this smiley.

You don’t waste much time after parking the moped, once you’re in you go on a ride together, the one with the least people waiting so you’re on in a dash.

“I’m actually really bad with adrenaline rides” he confesses as you get bucked in your seats, you turn to him with a confused smile.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” the ride starts lifting you up slowly so it can spin you around in the air,

“You looked so excited” you can’t help but laugh as you take his hand in your holding onto it tightly, watching his worried eyes scan the environment before shutting close as the spinning starts.

Honestly you had screamed a lot more than him, but his hand held onto your so tightly you couldn’t feel it anymore. You ended up alternating from slower rides to faster ones, he insisted on joining you but once in the ride you could tell see his regret so your hands would meet and you would scream together at drops, laughing about it once you were back on the ground.

It was more fun than most of your amusement park experiences for some reason, you felt lucky, to have someone drive you on a barely functional moped just to go on rides he couldn’t even stand, he was nothing like anyone ever painted him out to be, he was just a kind person. Finally taking a break from all the rides, you found refuge in a small playground right beside the place, dragging your tired feet along with a large ball of cotton candy in your hand for you to share.

You both found seats respectively on each side of a swing set, swinging along with the gentle seaside wind, it was a nice ambiance with the coloured lights still flashing from the fair.

“That was the most fun I’ve had in a while, I underestimated you” he looks over to you with a faint smile.

“I’m really not the bad guy you think I am,” you wanted to reassure him that you didn’t think that but the reminder that you didn’t know him that well came in, it was like you couldn’t help but protect your heart because of how easily you trusted people in the past. “I just got mixed up with the wrong people.” a dry scoff escapes his lips.

“I don’t—”

“Can you trust me again? I don’t really care what anyone else thinks but I want you to see me as me, not as caricature that someone else formed of me” his gaze is upwards to the starry night sky, not entirely sure you would take his word, you reach for his hand wrapped around the swing rope bringing him back to you.

For a change it was you listening to him, he explained how baseless the rumours were, a product of envy from peers across the campus, he never did anything to trigger it, he only kept to himself and that annoyed people. They felt they were entitled to his attention and since he didn’t bother amusing their tricks, they used rumours to make him detested by people who didn’t even know him. You were no different from those who spread the rumours, judging him from the moment you met instead of giving him a chance to be himself.

“I’m so sorry, Dongmin” from the first day you could tell he wasn’t as bad as you had heard him to be, but you held on to whispered words when you could have just let yourself realize the truth.

He smiles getting up from his seat to meet you crouching in front of you to meet your eyes, lifting your chin up gently before pulling your cheeks up to form a smile.

“I like it when you smile more, don’t feel bad for me” his eyebrows raise in shock surprised by your deepened frown, watching as your gaze trail off.

“So you really didn’t want to fuck me?” you ask glancing at him hesitantly, it was a joke to ease the mood, you hadn’t thought it through much but you wanted to know what he would say as a joke.

“I wouldn’t go that far” he laughs picking out a ball of cotton candy from you before going back to his swing like nothing happened while you tried to decipher the depth of that short sentence.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

🏷️; @ihopeusmile

#bnd #bnd x reader #boynextdoor #bnd fluff #boynextdoor fanfic #boynextdoor fluff #gs.files #han taesan x reader #taesan fluff #taesan x reader #han taesan #taesan #dongmin boynextdoor #han dongmin #tae

43 notes · View notes

aceri1485 · 3 months

Text

Running Away

Chapter 1: An old friend and a fresh start

Synopsis: A Kpop star leaves Korea to run away from drama and start over, reconnect with himself and figure out if he still wants to make music or if its time to move on.

a/n: Finally ready to start posting ahhh here we go! This idea has been on my mind for literally years so I'm excited to finally dedicate some time to it. I'm guessing it will be a longer series - this first part is meant to be a quick introduction to see what people think.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

Hajoon looked up from his phone, pulling a knock off brand Airpod from his ear, ready to be annoyed at whoever was interrupting his PubG mobile game, only to break out into a grin when he saw who it was.

“Siwoo! Your flight landed early!” he said to the man who had interrupted him. Siwoo stood in front of him, arms crossed. It was clear he had tried to dress not to draw attention - black hoodie, loose fit grey joggers, a black face mask, hair falling down into his eyes, no luggage but a single black hard shell carry on beside him - but even with his face covered, it was hard to deny that the 6 ft man was drawing the gaze of every woman, and more than a few men, in the vicinity. Game forgotten, Hajoon put his phone in his pocket and opened his arms wide for a hug.

“I said,” started Siwoo, stepping back and putting a hand out to stop Hajoon from stepping closer, “what the hell are you doing here?”

Hajoon sighed, arms dropping to his sides, “I thought you’d be happy to see a friendly face after such a long flight.” Siwoo glanced over his shoulder, catching two girls waiting for their luggage staring at him and whispering to each other behind their hands, “I was trying not to cause a scene, man.” The two girls, caught, blushed and turned away quickly, pretending to be really interested in a suitcase going by them on the carousel. Hajoon looked over Siwoo's shoulder to see who he was looking at, then rolled his eyes, “Siwoo, you’re joking right? I am not the problem here - you draw attention to yourself just by existing.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” Siwoo asked, crossing his arms again as if attempting to make himself smaller. “C’mon, man. This is Vancouver. It doesn’t matter if you're wearing plain clothes, there are still people around here who will recognize that your sweater is from the 2019 D’Antidote drop and your shoes are one-of-one Nikes. Not to mention your suitcase is Gucci - and in immaculate condition. Seriously, did you take it out of the wrapping just for this trip?” Hajoon teased, pretending to wipe a speck of dust off of Siwoo’s suitcase. Siwoo blushed, “Its from the 2020 drop, actually,” he said, pulling at the sleeve of his hoodie self-consciously, “but besides - everyone must think they’re just knock-offs.” “Mhmm..” Hajoon wrapped an arm around Siwoo and started guiding him towards the exit, “and none of them noticed that you were in first class and breezed through customs first either I bet.”

“I - I guess I didn’t think -” Siwoo stuttered, but Hajoon shushed him. “Don’t worry about it man. Let’s just get out of here.”

“Fine.” Siwoo said, then fell silent for a moment as they walked away from the baggage carousels towards the promise of sunlight outside. “I am glad to see you, Hajoon. It was… a long flight.” “I bet, man,” Hajoon said, patting Siwoo on the back, “I’m glad you got here safe. You can tell me about it later, okay?” Siwoo smiled for the first time since getting on the plane back in Seoul. Before that, he had smiled only to his mother as she hugged him goodbye - an empty smile, meant only to reassure her that everything was going to work out - and before that he hadn’t smiled in, well, months. The media had attributed his low demeanour to smoulder, being fashionably sad, haughty and disinterested. The fans thought he was upset about some secret breakup, a relationship gone sour, and rumours ran wild about who it could have been and why they must have broken up. His family didn’t ask much, just knew that the pressures of his work were building, and left him to his own devices.

Siwoo sighed to himself, then shook his head slightly to clear the cloud forming in his mind as he and Hajoon stepped outside. Shading his eyes from the sun, Siwoo looked around, “So, where did you park?” “Park?” Hajoon said, turning to him, “I didn’t.. I didn’t drive here man. We’re taking a taxi.” Siwoo baulked, “A taxi? What, why?” The grin forming on Hajoon’s face was starting to worry him, “Don’t you have a car here?”

At this, Hajoon outright laughed, “Oh man, am I about to blow your mind. Did you forget what you were signing up for?” Hajoon grabbed Siwoo’s suitcase and rolled it to the back of the line of people waiting for taxis, “Welcome to being a nobody, man. You’ll get used to it.”

Siwoo was quiet in the taxi, fiddling with the rings on his fingers and letting Hajoon give the driver the address and make small talk. As they passed industrial pathways mixed in with apartment buildings, over unfamiliar bridges from which you could see both the mountains and the ocean, and through winding suburbs with hedge upon hedge and seemingly pointless roundabouts, Siwoo felt the fatigue of travel finally settling in. By the time Hajoon and Siwoo stepped out of the cab in front of an unassuming apartment building on the edge of downtown, he was barely hiding his yawns.

Both stopped and looked up at the building, savouring the warmth of the sunlight on their backs and the pink-orange haze coming from the light hitting the windows of the apartment building. Then, without saying a word, they started towards the front door, Siwoo’s suitcase wheels clacking over the cracked sidewalk. “I picked up the key this morning,” Hajoon said, pulling an envelope out of his back pocket and handing it to Siwoo, “I hope its okay, but I went in to make sure everything was alright and left your lease papers on the kitchen counter. Here, watch -” he punched in the code to the front door, making sure Siwoo was paying attention.

Siwoo shook a small key out of the envelope, “Thanks, man. I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“Hey, buy me dinner once you’re settled in and we’ll call it even,” Hajoon smiled, “Oh, by the way, your landlord wanted to meet you today but I convinced her to come by tomorrow afternoon instead.”

“Thank you,” Siwoo sighed again, “I don’t think dinner will be enough for how much I owe you.” He hesitated at the threshold, “Did you want to come up and see the place?”

“No, that’s okay - like I said, I saw it earlier today,” Hajoon said, “and besides, I know you must be tired.”

“I’m not tired, I swear!” Siwoo said through an unconcealable yawn, causing the two to break out laughing.

“Sure, man, whatever you say,” Hajoon said, laughter dying down, “Just shoot me a text tomorrow, yeah? I live just a couple blocks away.” He held his arms open for a hug again, raising his eyebrows at Siwoo.

Siwoo smiled, then gave Hajoon a hug, squeezing tight and patting him on the back, “I will. Thanks again.”

Siwoo stood at the front door to the building until Hajoon had walked away around the corner, then turned to fully enter the building. He glanced down at the envelope again to check the apartment number - 404 - then looked around the tiny lobby of the building.

“I.. thought he was joking.” he said to himself under his breath, realising that Hajoon was being serious when he told him there was no elevator in the building. After taking a moment, the fact that he would need to do four flights of stairs before finally collapsing into a bed after almost 12 hours of travel really sinking in, Siwoo started up the stairs.

Because really, what could 4 flights of stairs do to stop him from his fresh start after everything he had already endured?

To be continued...

#writing #creative writing #writing series #kpop #new story #new chapter #my fics #fic update

1 note · View note

skatingbi · 7 months

Text

Fighter Pilot AU- The character's roles in the storyline so far (Pt. 2/3)

Hello again and welcome to part two! This will talk about Sanji, Usopp, and Chopper. This is subject to change as I develop the story more but I hope to stay as consistent as possible for my own sanity.

Without further ado, here you go!

CW: I talk about childhood trauma and child abuse in Sanji's section. Please do not read this post if this content may be triggering.

Sanji: Sanji is...a lot. Not in the sense that he's overbearing or annoying but that he has a lot of baggage. Up until about 8-10 (I think? Idk how old Sanji was when he rean away in the canon storyline) he was raised by Judge. In this AU Judge is a person of interest for the Marines. That being said, instead of genetic modification on his children he conditions them instead.

Not for the marine's, though. Judge has his own motives that actually threaten the marines and several countries as well.

Sanji is targeted since day one in Judge's house. Subjected to military training and also torture when he's older as well. When Sanji is imprisoned in the basement with the metal helmet, he gets scars from where the helmet digs into his jaw. His brothers contributed to the abuse as well, using him for sparring even though its more brutal than that.

His sister helps him escape, and he makes a run for it with the helmet still on until he collapses from dehydration and hunger.

He wakes up, and Zeff is there, his helmet is off, and he's in a bed that feels so comfortable he doesnt even question who the stranger is.

Fast forward ten years and Sanji joins the marines as a fighter pilot to stop the vinsmoke family. He's only able to join because he's adopted by zeff and takes the last name Blackleg.

Sanji's trauma makes him defensive around men. This makes him hard to approach for a lot of people except the strawhat friend group, who all have their own trauma as well and understand what it feels like to be hurt by someone who should have cared for you. He's always assuming the worst in people and questioning their motives. When someone gets close his first instinct is to push them away before they hurt him.

His friends understand, though, and they never let him fall for his brain's tricks. They know hes incredibly smart and a talented fighter pilot, he's a good friend and a great part of their team. So they always make sure to tell him so.

Usopp: Usopp joins the marines for Kaya. Kaya is in medical school, but Usopp wants to prove to her that he is just was willing to work hard. At first, people just assume Usopp somehow tricked his way into the top gun program until they see his skill at nav and shooting. He's extremely accurate and the crew appreciate how much work he puts into what he does.

He's always there to lend a hand or a shoulder. He may overexaggerate his work on assignments or training a lot, but he always does it as a way to distract everyone from the stress of being in the military. He's like the class clown, always cracking jokes when its appropriate.

He's also kind of a coward. Dont get me wrong, he's really good at his job. Put him in the front seat of a massive piece of equipment he's meant to fly though and he freezes up. He knows exactly what to do but he's way too anxious to do it.

He will, though. I already planned that out for him. When sanji and zoro are stranded in enemy territory, usopp will come in when luffy is too busy doing god knows what else. It'll probably be the first time he actually successfully flies and definitely the only time.

Chopper: Chopper is human in this au since its a modern au. I'd like to think he's a short dude with brown wavy hair, brown eyes, and a baby face that people always point out. Even though he's canadian in canon his ethnicity will be up to yall's imagination (in my brain he's a mixed kid like me but thats just to put in some rep for myself ngl).

Anyways, Chopper is a medic. Combat medic? I'm not sure, but I like to think so. He is willing to fight a bitch if they even think of injuring one of his friends/comrades. Originally, he's just a medic sent on assignments that will require medical attention one way or another, but then he's assigned as a medic to the top gun students.

At first, he's super nervous around the group because they're all extremely smart and talented fighter pilots. That only lasts a week, though, when he sees luffy and sanji almost getting into a fist fight because luffy tries to steal Nami's food during breakfast. Nami is yelling at them to shut the hell up, Usopp is still half asleep and waiting for the caffiene to kick in, Zoro is still sleeping with his head on the table, and Robin is laughing to herself while watching it all happen. That morning is the moment Chopper realizes they're all ridiculous.

#one piece #one piece fighter pilot au #Man...writing sanji's section made me sad

0 notes

kinetic-elaboration · 10 months

Text

August 22: AHS 5x03 Mommy

There’s always so much going on in these episodes. I have to say, this wasn’t a bad one. I liked that it focused more on the female characters and generally stronger story lines and less on the serial murders or the ghost sadist or what the fuck ever.

I liked the scene between Sally and the detective, minus the shadowy appearance of the rape demon in the background because I could do without that—not because I ship them or anything but just because it was hot and creepy with the flickering lighting, etc.

I don’t feel like I know enough about Iris and Donovan to really… get the extent of their emotions with each other. I mean… I don’t want to say ‘I wish we knew more about what made her an awful mom’ because there might be more of that in later episodes that I forgot about. Certainly the one story Donovan told in this episode was not flattering and it gave an indication of what sort of bad mom she was: faddish and selfish. But… mmm, I have a bias toward female characters and also toward moms. And Iris’s main character trait across three episodes is loving her son a lot and giving up her whole life in devotion to him and so it’s hard to take his side on it. I don’t want to say that Liz summed it up as well as can be with ‘no one will ever love you more than her’ because there are certainly some implications from that I won’t sign on to, but for the purpose of this story, sure, that basically is what it comes down to.

(Also, the usual, love Liz, “No self-pit in my bar!”)

So I guess overall I liked the Donovan and Iris story this episode and it had a fitting ending. Also, I want to know more about them; I like that time is being spent on them, even if it seems like more tell than show in a way.

I really like Chloe Sevigny’s character, I guess mostly because I like Chloe Sevigny, and it was nice to see her getting a voice over and a chance to be front and center for a bit. Drop that sad-sack serial killer husband! Drop him! Get rid of him, he’s baggage!

I vaguely remember some of her story going forward but I don’t really remember what I thought of it, so we’ll see.

I think there was just the right amount of the Countess in this one. Just enough for her to be glamorous and appealing and sexy in a violent way (violent in a sexy way?) but not so much that it gets boring or that we’re spending like 20 minutes out of an unnecessary 70 on softcore blood porn. I enjoyed her Bernie Madoff back story lol. One of the narrators in the oral history project at work was at the Madoff sentencing and now I’m imagining her meeting the Countess and it’s just all very funny.

Perhaps my favorite part of the episode was the Pam Grief, I mean Angela Bassett, I mean Ramona Royale or whatever little vignette in the middle. It was stylish and over the top and sexy and weird, and the right length, and she had such a great entrance. I’ve honestly completely forgotten about her so I’m excited to watch that story line as if it were new.

Overall, I… do think this season has some good characters and some good ideas. It’s a lot better when it focuses on what I consider its stronger aspects, worse when it’s just the Two Sadists Show. It also helps when someone edits it down to a regular hour long show length, as opposed to when it’s allowed to creep to 65, 70, 75 minutes for no reason. I wish it were campier, I think. I enjoy the spare bits of humor: the Bermuda shorts with cannabis, the “if this were hell, I’d be wearing your ugly ass outfit” line. Maybe it’s my fault for taking it too seriously but I wish it were… less serious.

#the year 2023 #2023: fandom thoughts #2023: ahs

0 notes

georgiapeach30513 · 2 years

Text

Entangled Lust, Pt. 2

Summary: Frank tries, and you and Bucky talk

Pairings: Bucky Barnes X Reader

Rating: mildly explicit

Warnings: explicit language, implied sexual acts, mentions of D/s dynamics, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 3.1K

Series Masterlist

*divider created by @firefly-graphics

“I…I…”

Bucky sighs, listening to your mumbling and shocked self. There was an intriguing quality to you though. Most the girls he sees in the club, are desensitized. While yes, they are trained and conditioned, but there was something about teaching you. Watching your innocent eyes as he takes you deeper into his world.

While your inability to talk about sex was a bit annoying, there was also something about seeing you flustered in front of him. The thought of breaking down your walls slowly, learning your body, proving to you how much it could take, even that wonder in your eyes when you try something new. You would be worth the annoying start. He would shape you into his perfect doll.

Obedient, kind, demure, but could easily be brought to your knees for him. You would become his project, and one he’s going to have fun with no matter what.

“Doll, I feel as if this is stressing you out. Maybe your curiosity would be better suited to research online.”

“No!” just what he was hoping for. The first sign of rejection had you willing and ready to please him. A natural sub. Sure you had some refining to do.

“I’m sorry. This is just new. I want…I don’t need to pick up bad habits, right?”

“No, I would prefer you didn’t. Maybe a conversation over coffee?” he can almost hear your hesitance. Talking about BDSM, in a public place was going to be a no for you. Another thing he was hoping for.

“I mean, it’s such a sensitive subject. Wouldn’t it better…” you stop. You don’t really want him at your place. The prospect of having an owner of a BDSM club at your place alone stressed you out.

“I don’t think coming to the club is suitable. You can barely form a sentence in telling me what you do want. If you’re comfortable, we can get coffee, and walk to my place?” you ignore your gut feeling about being along with a man you had only just met. But there was such a pull to discover more. You needed a way to work through your growing frustration.

Frustration caused by your own doing. You had no business having any form of relationship with Frank, and definitely not Steve. There was such a kindness from Frank, and you couldn’t help the pull.

“Okay, that’s fine.”

“I’ll call you Friday, and we’ll have our conversation then. Ease you in, and whenever you’re ready to tap out…that is if you want to tap out, you can.”

You busy yourself with cleaning the classroom for the weekend. Making sure everything is put away and back in its spot. Constantly checking your phone for a call or text from Bucky.

Still nervous, but also ready. Ready to try something different. The many things you have tried just to get Frank’s attention only led him to completely ignore you, and you’re tired of trying so hard. Got a tiny piece of him, only for the friendship you had created to be ripped away.

Frank watches your back from the doorway, wondering if he should even listen to Steve. Figuring a woman like you would never want a man like him. Baggage of a child that isn’t his. Middle class and simple man. He takes a deep breath and decides he at least needs to apologize.

“Miss Honey?” he asks already walking in to the class.

“Mr. Adler,” you respond already walking to your desk to check your phone yet again. You miss his face fall at the more formal name.

“I just wanted to…”

“Are we discussing Mary? Her grades are excellent. Her and Casey Rogers have become quite the pair. But you already knew that didn’t you?”

Frank is well aware how he has created unnecessary tension between the two of you, “Mr. Adler, things that happen outside of this classroom will not affect Mary inside. She is an intelligent child who is helpful to everyone in here. Have no fear.”

With a quick vibration of your phone both you and Frank look at it. It was habit for him, but seeing Bucky’s name on display causes your demeanor to change. You glance up at Frank before flipping your phone upside down.

“That’s not why…I um, I feel the need to explain things.”

“You’ve had more than a month to explain things.”

Your phone goes of again, and you pick it up quickly responding to Bucky you were almost finished cleaning up, and you would call him when you left. “Let me at least make it up to you.”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Adler, I am very busy. If you would, please,” you gesture towards the door. Knowing that this conversation has nothing to do with Mary. And you really have somewhere you needed to be. Bucky is prompt. If he says he will call or text he will, and you know he expects the same thing from you.

“Right. Miss Honey, I am sorry,” there it was, that sweet pouting face that you had come to fall for. There was something so endearing about Frank. But that was neither here nor there.

He made it perfectly clear how he deals with things. Runs away and avoids the situation. And while you enjoyed the weekends at Ferg’s where the two of you would end up laughing and cutting up, you knew your worth. And you wouldn’t wait forever.

Frank fiddles around with a motor to a boat. Sitting there feeling sorry for himself, with that name on your phone flashing in his mind. You didn’t want him to see that. Turning your phone over, made it perfectly clear that you did not need him to know who was calling. And then he text. Not showing up at the bar last weekend, like usual, leads him to believe there is someone in your life.

He had never heard you so short or matter-of-fact with him. There was no softness to your voice, and no joy behind what you were saying. The only smile you even gave was when you looked at your phone. Bucky Barnes. That cursed name that took your attention off of him. And then he got that excited smile. The smile, he had hoped you gave when he text or called.

“You do not look like you’re ready,” Steve proclaims just walking through the door. He stares at his friend zoned out and in his mind. “What happened? You actually speak with her?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Frank continues messing with the motor, ignoring Steve altogether.

“It did to her.”

Frank shakes his head no. He knew he shouldn’t have listened to Steve. He’s the reason he’s in this mess. Things between you and him were fine until Steve got into his head.

“It did.”

“No it didn’t.”

“Sit there and mope. She was there last weekend and left because she saw your truck. You waited too long.”

“No, you decided to squeeze yourself into the relationship we were building. I told myself I wouldn’t get too involved with her while she was teaching Mary. And then you…”

“If I recall correctly, you were the one who asked me to take the two of you home,” Frank looks at Steve furrowing his brows. “What exactly do you think happened?”

“We…uh…you know?” Steve still doesn’t follow, shrugging his shoulders at Frank. “We had a threesome.”

“So you think I took advantage of the situation? You and her, drunk off tequila shots, not only drove you home but crawled in the bed with you two, and had sex? With you? Why would I want to see all that? I’m not interested in her in the slightest,” Steve grabs his stomach, and starts belly laughing, while Frank stares at him annoyed.

“Is that why you’re acting so weird with her? I brought you two here. She was pushing you into the bedroom, making out with you, and I’m pretty sure that was about it.”

“You woke up in the bed with us. She…sh-sh-she…” Frank tries to think back on that night. Bits and pieces barely being put together, but he doesn’t recall Steve ever being there. Random moments of the two of you, and now he struggles to recall if anything happened but you and him colliding trying to kiss. While Steve was only in the bed the following morning.

Waking up to you, clinging to him, while Steve was as far away from the two of you, as the king sized bed would allow.

“I had nowhere else to sleep. She woke up to get water and saw me sprawled in the floor and told me to get in the bed with you two. She fell a few times getting back. I never was apart of whatever happened in that bedroom before that.”

“Still shouldn’t have happened,” Frank sighs. “She’s our kids teacher. I cant…doesn’t matter,” he angrily starts messing with the motor again.

“Why? You two clearly like each other. You’re just idiots.”

“She’s talking to some guy.”

Steve cocks up his eyebrow at Frank, urging him to continue. “When I went to talk to her, a Bucky Barnes was calling her. Pretty sure he text, too. And she responded and was smiling.”

Steve doesn’t want to dive into that with Frank. It’s none of his business what you could possibly want to do with Bucky. Even though he doesn’t think the two of you have very much in common.

“No comment to that, I see,” Frank dead pans. His face flat as he stares at Steve.

“Man, you avoided her for a month. I highly doubt…” Steve takes a deep sigh, and Frank looks up at him curiously. “It’s just, they seem like an odd pair.”

“You know him?” Steve nods his head. “What does he do?”

“A lot. I keep the books for his business. He’s…they’re an odd pair. They’re probably just friends.”

“Maybe,” Frank whispers. Thinking about whether it’s best for him to be honest with you, or just let you go. That isn’t something he’s ready to do, but he also never would want to insert himself where he is not wanted.

“She had to have just met him. It’s not serious.”

“She said she was busy. They’re going out.”

“Oh, I’m sure she’s busy if she’s dating him. Just put on one of your terrible shirts, and have a beer with me. Stew over what you thought we did, instead of actually acting on your feelings. If she’s dating Bucky, it’s because he was man enough to ask her out. You can’t invite a girl to your house, and then not speak to her afterwards and she thinks it was a mistake or just sex or whatever that shit was you did. Go. I won’t take no for an answer.”

You follow Bucky up to his loft apartment, walking almost too slow. Scared to wonder what this conversation could entail. The two of you had talked and text throughout the week, and none of which involved Bucky’s club, or the offer he had made you.

The casual and ‘normal’ talk making you feel more at ease. Like Bucky was trying his damnedest to get you to feel comfortable around him, but that looming feeling of what exactly this meeting was about had you on edge.

“Breathe, doll face,” his voice calmly says to you, and you can nearly feel your knees buckle. There was something about the tone of his voice that was so attractive. Even his little pet name for you. Normally you would find it off putting, but the way he said it…you liked it too much.

He walks over to the table in his loft and sits down almost too smoothly. Everything he does is with ease. Slowly bringing his iced coffee to his lips to take a drink. “So what do you want to know?”

You gulp, looking around his loft before your eyes fall to the table. “How do you go from normal, you know…to pain.”

Every time you struggle to say the word, Bucky inhales and exhales deeply. His fingers tap on the table, and you dare to look up at him. “Try again. There is no judgement here. But that is strike one. We’re here, having an open conversation.”

You take a sip from your own drink, and slowly ask, “How do you go from normal…sex…to pain and…being tied up.”

Bucky gives you a smile, whispering out, “Good girl,” and he smirks when he sees the chill run up your spine.

“What is normal sex? Just missionary?” you give him a shrug, now overthinking what normal sex is.

“Has a partner ever choked you? Pulled your hair? Grabbed your hips tightly and it caused bruises? Pounded into you so hard you see stars?”

“Well, yeah, but…”

“Then you have in fact dabbled in BDSM. You’re looking at it as straight tying you up, whipping you, punishing you. Dominates and submissives aren’t all pain and kink. There’s a comfort between both consenting parties. That comfort takes place before you even get to sex. Before you get to the kink. And everyone’s kink can be different. You as the submissive are the one with the power.”

Furrowing your brow you finally look up at him confused. “Do you doubt me?”

“How would I have the power? You tell me what to do and I…well, I follow your rules. And you…I mean, the dominate is the one with the power.”

“Correction, the one with the control. You establish your boundaries. Like our relationship. We have not established anything. I am teaching you this life, and clearly you have no idea. There’s very few things I will say no to. But say you’re my submissive, you lay out your boundaries, and I adhere to them. Who has the power? I don’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. If you’re curious about something, but not ready, I don’t push you. I wait on your say so. You hold all the power. My priority is you and your needs.”

You look around his place, trying to formulate a thought. Needing to find the best way to ask, but coming up with nothing. Deciding it best just to blurt it out, “What do you get out of this then?”

“It’s comforting to feel needed. To feel trusted. To have someone that is so soft and needs my protection, my love and care. Someone who trusts me so much, that they are willing to push them to the edge, before I softly and soothingly bring them back down from their high. There’s power in that. But it’s comfort I seek. An intense man, like myself, needs that tenderness from his submissive.”

“So I’m yours?” he shakes his head no at you, but smiles when your face falls. “Why not?”

“We are talking. You are asking questions. And I am answering them. You don’t trust me. We’re not there yet. But should we, then yes, you could be mine.”

Your eyes cast down at your phone when there’s a little ping. You check it, noticing that it’s a simple message from Frank, ‘Call me.’

“Maybe you need time to figure out what you should want.”

“No,” Bucky raises both eyebrows. Crossing his arms over his chest, he leans back in his chair. “I mean…”

“Who was that?”

“No one.”

“You’re lying,” you shake your head rapidly, and he holds out his hand. “Let me see.”

“It was one of my student’s parents,” he nods his head slowly at you, and for some reason you feel shame for not revealing the whole truth. “A father.”

“He single?”

“Bucky…”

“I’m just needing to know if you’re taking my request seriously. If I am to invest time into you, I expect the same in return. If you want to date the father of one of your students, by all means, have at it. If we are going to further your education, I need to know you’re committed to your lessons, and to me. That is my boundary,” you shake your head no at him, and you see his eyes flicker towards you.

“That is not an answer. At this point, you should know I want direct answers. I want your words, your confirmation, that you are taking me and this seriously.”

You take a slow and ragged breath. Calming your nerves, “He’s single. But there’s nothing going on between us. At one point I thought there was.”

“Was that so hard?”

“No.”

“Wouldn’t it have been easier to just be explicitly honest with this father? Know without your mind thinking a hundred different scenarios in your head? Doll, there’s more than one reason to be honest. I expect the honesty.”

“Can…” you look into his eyes. There is an odd quality to them. An almost instant need to want to hear him say good girl. A desire to make him proud of your behavior.

“Would I be able to tap out at any moment?”

“Good girl,” your eyes flutter close, and you can hear him chuckle. He looks down to your lap, and sees you fidget around. Trying everything in your power not to clench your thighs together, but you fail.

He could just about bet that you are drenched. You are more than just curious, you want to try. And you will, in time, “At any moment that it becomes too much, let me know. I believe that’s all for today. But I want you to do something for me.”

“Anything,” you answer quickly.

Bucky cracks his neck, and tries to think of anything besides the way his cock twitches in his pants. He’s already starting to figure you out. Thinking of ways that he could help you be a better sub for him.

“I want you to research your basic Dom/sub relationships. Daddy Doms and little girl, master and servant, owner and pet, primal, there’s so many options. Find out which ones speak to you. This life isn’t just about pain, so quit thinking that. If pain is something you’re into, we will discuss that.”

“Will…” you feel your cheeks heat up, as the question hangs in the back of your throat. “Will we do hands on experience?”

“I’ve told you, that is up to you. If sex is what you want, then you should have it. If you want to relinquish the control of your body to me, fuck you completely dumb, and let that pretty little head of yours be quiet, that’s what I’ll do. But it won’t be tonight, and it won’t be tomorrow. You are the one that gives me control, because you are the one with the power. Now, let me take you home.”

Once he stands, you follow his lead quickly, and he softly places his hand at the small of your back. He’s made you curious. Made you want more of him, and already, were allowing him to guide you. Comfortable enough to let him touch you, and he didn’t miss the shiver that crawled up your back at his touch.

“I’m very proud of you for letting your walls down, and speaking your mind. You did so well,” you preen at his praise, and he makes a mental note. Thinking to himself that you are going to be a great, and an easier pupil than he once thought.

The training for the perfect sub should be short, easy, and this time…he won’t make a mistake.

Masterlist

Taglist: @ria132love @tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot

#entangled lust #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #dark!bucky barnes #frank adler #frank adler x reader #steve rogers

123 notes · View notes