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bunnliix · 2 months

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Can't Stay Away from You - Chapter Three

I'm finally back after over a month! I hope this is enough to make up for not updating this series for a month.

masterlist wc: 5.7k warnings: panic attacks, disassociation maybe??, better to be safe than sorry, reader just has a rough time in this chapter, angsty times, violence against doors, violence in general, Minho bites, slightly suggestive-ish??, also fluff!! I think that's it?? I'm really not sure at this point, but it's basically reader having a rough time and the boys helping her

Y/n was the first to wake up the next morning, and she found herself in a bit of a pickle, stuck in between the two omegas of the skz pack. She was in a bit of shock, not remembering anything past being on the couch in their living room. She wasn’t quite sure how she got to be here, in the middle of their nest, and in the middle of the eight men. She noticed that Felix had attached himself to her back, their legs entangled along with Han’s, and her birthday twin was clinging onto her front, his head almost buried in her neck. She could feel his breath on her neck, and it made her shiver. She didn’t think that she’d ever be in this position, but fuck now that she knew what she was missing out on, she never wanted to sleep alone again. It just felt so right to be here, it felt right to be with them, but that thought was also terrifying.

She started to try and untangle herself from the pile, needing a moment to breathe, and a moment to herself. She tried pulling her legs out of the pile, to little luck, the two omegas’ grips were almost cutting off the circulation in her legs when she tried pulling them up towards her chest. Her next move was to try and pull herself out of the boys’ grip, only to have them hold onto her tighter, as she let out a huff as their stubbornness, even while they’re asleep. Stupid omegas not letting go.

She froze as she felt a pair of lips on the back of her neck, knowing that had to be the freckled sunshine boy. She took a harsh breath in as she tried to relax, but then Han left his own kiss on her neck, as she gripped the bed underneath her to try and ground herself. She could feel herself slicking up after the actions of the two omegas, her own omega screaming in joy at this whole situation. She tried to will her thoughts in a less smutty direction, to which it almost worked.

That was, until Seungmin woke up due to her movements and her scent that betrayed her. His sleep filled eyes looked at her over Han’s head, an eyebrow raising at her actions, and she quickly looked away, garnering a chuckle out of the vocalracha member.

“Go back to sleep, omega.” He says, morning voice very evident, as his voice sounded much more gravelly than normal.

She shivered at it, and silently nodded, though she pouted at being told to go back to sleep. The change in her scent as she thought of how nice the singer’s morning voice sounded was what finally work Han up, and the rapper smirked at her change in scent. She got so flustered just at his member’s voice, and Seungmin didn’t even have the best morning voice. That would go to the Aussie line, with Minho as a close third place. Those men’s voices in the morning, he would never get enough of them. It may also be the reason why on mornings where they had schedules, the alarms were set for earlier than usual. Jisung pulled her back down into his arms, holding her tighter so she couldn’t escape.

“Not allowed to leave, ‘mega.” Han says, voice full of sleep, though his smirk could be heard in his tone of voice as well.

Seungmin chuckled at her predicament, finding it hilarious. His laugh woke Minho up, however, and once the dancer was awake, he also chuckled at what she had gotten herself into. She looked adorable trapped between his two omegas, and she looked like she belonged right in the middle of their nest, like she had occupied it forever.

“Cute. Three cute omegas, and my good omegas for keeping little omega in bed with us.” He praised the two, and Han preened at the praise from the alpha, while y/n pouted.

“I’m not cute.” She protested, to which Minho only raised an eyebrow, staying silent while he stared at her.

“Just cause I’m an omega, doesn’t mean I’m cute. Got it mister?” She said, glaring at him now.

This riled up the alpha, who was very rarely challenged. He growled in warning to her, red eyes flashing at her. She crossed her arms, staring at him dead in the eyes, challenging him to do something if he’s that bothered.

“Omega, stop with the denial. Now.” He once again growled at her, his alpha very unhappy with her disobedience, and the self-deprecating nature of her comments. By this point, the rest of the pack had woken up from their exchange, if not by Minho’s growls.

“Hmmm, nahhh. I’m good. Once again, I. Am. Not. Cute.” She said, voice firm, but with a teasing lilt to it.

Han had wisely loosened his grip, and had loosened Felix’s as well, just in time for Minho to grab her. The alpha pulled her underneath himself, staring down at her as his eyes flashed red, warning her that his alpha was dangerously close to the surface. She stared defiantly back at him, not willing to budge on her position, nor showing any fear of the alpha. His alpha enjoyed the good fight, but was displeased by the omega refusing to submit, disregarding the fact that she wasn’t their omega, and had no obligation to submit to them, to him.

“Omega, be good.” He said firmly.

“I’ll pass on that.” Was all she said in return.

Normally, an omega would have bared her neck in this situation, but y/n fought that urge and won, leaving the alpha to have to force her to bare it. Minho, who was running completely on instinct once again, leaned down close to her neck and he nipped at it, leaving a mark.

“Omega. Submit. Now.” He growled into her neck, biting at her neck harder a second time when she didn’t give in right away.

Y/n whined, unprepared for what happened, but she submitted and gave in. She stopped fighting him, and bared her neck willingly, to which the alpha above her grinned at winning.

“Good ‘mega. Very good.” He told her, kissing the marks he left. “Don’t deny it again, or pull an attitude with me. You’ll end up back underneath me if you do.” He told her simply, before flopping down on top of her.

She whined in embarrassment but a blush remained on her face after she processed what happened, and Minho chuffed in delight at it, before he allowed her to move out from under him. She didn’t get the freedom she wanted, however, since Hyunjin immediately pulled the omega into his arms, holding her tightly. The others chuckled and laughed at her predicament, enjoying seeing her be passed from one member to another, thinking about how cute she was. Though a couple did worry about her, seeing as she was just subjected to Minho’s alpha, mostly the betas, since they knew how it was to be subjected to an alpha, especially in the manner she had just been affected. They watched her closely, eyes following her movements.

Eventually Hyunjin loosened his grip, and y/n took advantage of this to escape his hold, quickly scurrying out of the room before anyone else could take the chance to catch her once again. Thankfully, for her sake, she quickly found the bathroom, only running into a few of the boys’ rooms before finding it. She locked the door behind her once she entered, and she quickly used the bathroom before she found herself in the mirror, staring back at herself. She looked at herself, not recognizing the person she saw in the mirror’s reflection. Hair mussed and out of place, Minho’s bite marks visible on her shoulder, and she just looked different. She couldn’t describe what was different exactly, and that plus all of the feelings that had been building up in her that morning finally fought their way to the surface.

She couldn’t believe everything that’s happened in the last 24 hours, let alone the last 48 hours. She went from bumping into who she now knows was Felix, to the fanmeet and meeting Stray Kids and getting Chan’s number, to Hyunjin and Minho showing up at her hotel room last night before bringing her here, to waking up in the nest with them. What was her life, and what had she done to end up here? She couldn’t process all of this, nor could her omega. Her omega was distressed, but also strangely content, and she couldn’t comprehend that either. It was all a little too much for her omega and her to process, going from being alone by herself to being here, with all of them, and honestly being treated like a member of the pack, it’s almost too much to bear.

She vaguely saw herself sliding down the mirror, thoughts in her head of why she was here with them at all, why she was being treated like a member of the pack when she clearly wasn’t, why were they being this nice to her? She couldn’t understand how she, a normal fan who met them once, well Felix met her twice, and how this went from that to her sitting in their bathroom after having slept in their den. The world around her felt like it was spinning, and she couldn’t process anything going on around her, the only things she could focus on were the thoughts running through her mind, making her worry further. She felt sharp pin pricks, looking down to find that she had been digging her fingernails into her hands, breaking skin. Without realizing it, she had been hurting herself and her scent had leaked out of the bathroom, slowly invading the rest of the dorm.

Time skip backwards a tiny bit…

The boys watched y/n’s escape, laughing at how cute she was, as they heard the sounds of various doors opening and closing, before hearing silence, figuring that she had found either someone’s room to hide out in, or the bathroom. They chatted amongst themselves, figuring that she’ll find her way back once she’s ready. They mostly spoke about their own schedules, thankfully they all had the day off today, since they had just finished their comeback promotions, the fansign yesterday having been the final one of their promotion cycle.

It wasn’t until a disgustingly nasty smell wafted into the nest room that made a couple of the members gag that they realized something was horribly wrong. Felix and Chan jumped into action, the omega of the duo almost slipping on blankets as the two of them rushed out of the room, Minho and Jisung following closely behind, with the rest of the pack not far behind the four of them. They follow the scent to the bathroom, finding the door locked, and they know she’s in there.

“Y/n? Darling, please open the door for us please?” Felix called out to her, worry filling his voice.

The sour scent of smoke only gets stronger at his words, and he and Han know she could drop at any moment, and with the door in the way, they would have no way to help her. Chan sees a shadow move from underneath the door, and realized that she’s sitting against the door, which means forcing their way in wasn’t an option.

“Please baby, talk to us. We’re here for you.” Jisung called out, trying to keep the worry and fear out of his voice.

They hear her breathing pick up and Chan curses, if she wasn’t against the door, he would have gotten Changbin to break the door just so they could get to her. He tried to think of a way to get her away from the door, just so that they could break it down. He didn’t care if he had to get another door, her safety was more important than a door right now.

“She’s against the door, we need her out of the way, then Bin or I can break it down.” He whispered to the two omegas, who immediately understood what he wanted them to do. They continued talking to her, trying to coax her either away from the door, but really they wanted her to unlock the door, as it would make everything else much easier. They tried appealing to y/n first, but then when that didn’t work, they started appealing to her omega, hoping that it would work, because her scent smelled like a bonfire, and not in a comforting way.

Minho sees the shadow underneath the door move, and points it out, to which Chan immediately tries to open the door, still finding it locked. He huffs in frustration, but quickly reels that feeling in before he looks to Minho and Bin, who pull the omega duo closer to themselves, giving Chan the room he needs to bust the door open.

“Omega, stay away from the door, I’m gonna open it and I don’t want you hurt. Alpha doesn’t want to hurt you, okay?” Chan said to y/n, before he shoved his shoulder into the door, partially opening it. He tried once more, successfully breaking open the door, and looking into the room to find y/n pushed up against the bathtub, her wide eyes staring up at him. Her breathing is still way too fast, and tears are running down her cheeks and onto her chest as she just stares at him.

“Hey little omega. You’re okay, we’re gonna get you out of here and get you somewhere safer than the bathroom, yeah?” Chan told her, kneeling down on the ground in her line of sight , trying to make himself seem smaller so he didn’t appear threatening to her omega. He slowly inched closer to her, staying far enough away in case her omega felt threatened by a strange alpha’s presence. He watched her, her breathing still erratic but her eyes were trained on his form, not letting him out of her sight.

Chan took a deep breath before asking her, “Can I touch you, little one?”

He watched her, waiting for a response, but instead of replying, she launched herself at him. “Alpha.” She said as she pushed himself into the pack alpha’s arms, burying her head into his neck. Chan froze for a moment, before wrapping an arm around her and patting her back to comfort her. He whispered reassurances and comforting words in her ear, trying to calm her down as he felt her tears on his skin. He still had no idea why she was like this, nor what sparked this breakdown and subsequent drop, considering that her omega had taken control.

Hearing footsteps, he looks up to see Minho having made his way past the door, looking up at his second-in-command with worry and confusion in his eyes, seeing those same emotions mirrored in the other alpha’s eyes. The others peeked into the room, the two omegas whining at seeing how tiny y/n looked curled up in their leader’s arms, both them and their omegas wanting to reach out to her and calm her down themselves. They couldn’t stand seeing another omega in distress, it physically hurt them to see it, let alone for it to be a fan of theirs like this, and without knowing what caused it, they weren’t sure how to fix it.

Seungmin suddenly pushed his way through the rest of his pack and quickly entered the bathroom, moving past Minho and stealing y/n from Chan’s grip. He was a beta on a mission, even dodging a punch from his pack alpha for taking the omega. He darted out of the bathroom, carefully however, so that the girl in his arms never hit anything as he made his way to his own bedroom, knowing that the only way she’d calm down was to take her away from the onslaught of scents, especially her own. Staying in that stinky bathroom wouldn’t help her state of mind, it would only reinforce it. And since he tended to keep his own room pretty scent free except for his own and a few select scents, it was a perfect place to let her recover. Hyunjin and Changbin had immediately followed the youngest beta, trusting him as their pack beta to know what the best thing was to do, despite his age.

Seungmin pushed his bedroom door open, walking over to his bed as Hyunjin followed, as Changbin stayed at the door to keep everyone else out. Chan had almost stormed after the pack beta, his alpha ready for a fight with the beta who stole the omega out of his arms. It took both the other alphas to stop him, plus Changbin wouldn’t let him anywhere near the younger trio in the pack beta’s room.

“Chan, you need to chill off before you come anywhere near here.” Changbin told him, crossing his arms as he stood in the doorway of the bedroom. “Go take a walk, I don’t care what you do as long as you don’t try to force your way into this room right now.”

Chan huffed but didn’t say a word, walking away from them, against his own alpha’s wishes. Minho watched him walk away, deciding to keep an eye on him, knowing that it was his alpha making him feel this way, as Chan wouldn’t give into his anger easily if not for his alpha pushing him to. He said as much to the rest of the pack outside of the room, before stalking behind their pack leader.

Meanwhile, Seungmin beckoned Hyunjin to sit on his bed and once the other beta was sitting comfortably, passed y/n over to him, with whined protests coming from the omega who wanted to stay with him.

“Shhh, it’s okay, I’ll be back in a moment, okay? Jinnie is gonna take care of you for me, yeah? He’s a really good cuddler, I’ll have you know. Even if I don’t like to admit to enjoying cuddles that often, he gives really good ones.” Seungmin said to the omega, pointedly not looking up at the other beta as he said all of that.

He moved to his closet, finding a new blanket he had yet to use, and thankfully it was still in its packaging. He brought it out of his closet and over to the bed, taking it out of the plastic and wrapping it around y/n as Hyunjin helped him to do so. He sat on the bed in front of the other two, as Hyunjin whispered reassurances to the omega in his lap, and trying to convince her omega that she was safe with them, and to allow y/n to come back to the surface.

It took almost an hour for them to coax y/n back to the present with them, her actions still telling them that her omega wasn’t far from surfacing again, should the need arise. The two betas traded relieved looks, before Seungmin looked over at Changbin, who still played the bouncer role, keeping the others out of the room, even as the two omegas looked like they were five seconds away from tackling the buff man just so they could get close to y/n again. She looked up at Seungmin, who could see that her eyes were no longer glazed over and almost dull looking, they looked to have some of that life and sunshine back in them. He breathed a sigh of relief, before asking her the hard question.

“Hey, how are you feeling, sunshine?” He asked her.

He got a groan, and a mumbled, “Tired.” in return.

He chuckled, expecting that answer after everything that happened. He knew now wasn’t the time to ask the harder questions, like what exactly made her panic like that, and how she was faring after the omega drop. That would come later, when she wasn’t as tired, and when she was a bit more coherent. Hyunjin kept her mind in the present, blabbering about anything and everything as he swayed them both side to side, trying to help keep her relaxed.

Seungmin knew that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to let the others in the room now that she’s back with them, but he’s worried that one of them might try and ask too many questions about what happened and that could cause her to drop back down or spiral. That was what he didn’t want to happen. Looking over at the eldest beta, he could see the eldest was subtly pointing at Felix.

Felix wouldn’t be a bad choice, he usually was the comfort that most of the boys went to when they just needed someone to be there for them, without any pressure, and when one of the betas weren’t around to help either. He also would probably be the most comforting to y/n at the moment, and the one who would pick up on any cues she showed, being a fellow omega. He nodded to Bin, who let Felix and only Felix into the room, despite Han’s whine. Their sunshine omega carefully approached the bed, not wanting to spook or shock y/n.

“Hey, y/n sweetheart, Felix wants to come over here. Is that alright with you?” Hyunjin asked her, pointing out Felix who was waiting for her permission.

She didn’t look back at him, eyes locked onto Felix as she nodded. The other omega could see unshed tears in her eyes, from when she was still emotional earlier. Felix walked closer to the bed, and as soon as he was within arms length of y/n the slightly older omega reached out and grabbed a hold of him, almost launching herself at him. He pulled her close, lifting her into his arms as they embraced, the rest of the pack watching them with happiness in their eyes.

Felix moved to sit them both down on the bed, Seungmin and Hyunjin both hung around to keep y/n happy. The two had tried to get up and leave, only for the smallest omega to whine at their attempt to leave. They ended up in a pile on the bed, y/n’s quiet giggles making their squished situation on the bed much more bearable.

During this, Han disappeared from the pack that was waiting outside the door, which was only himself and Jeongin at this point, and headed to the living room, where he could hear the two eldest discussing something. As the younger man walked into the room, the two men looked up at him as he made his way over to them.

“We have to talk.” Han stated, looking at the other two.

“What about?” Chan asked, concerned.

“About how we’re all treating y/n like she’s already a part of our pack, when we all know she isn’t. At least not yet.” Han replied.

“Why is that a problem? Isn’t it better that we’re treating her like pack?” Minho asked. “We’re getting along insanely well, she fits right in, her scent is amazing. What’s so wrong about treating her like she’s one of us?”

“What’s wrong, is that although I think all of us, and our respective alphas, betas and omegas, treating her like pack means everything good, and that she’s probably meant to be one of us, is that it’s what’s caused her to break down like this. Before this happens again, we all need to sit down and talk. I’m serious, because I can see she’s like me, and you know exactly how bad I got when he-who-shall-not-be-named left us and the pack. I don’t want her going through that, because we’ve all decided something without telling her.” Han says, slightly scolding the boys without directly doing so.

The two alphas were sheepish, knowing that they did kinda fuck up with what they’ve done so far. Though now that Han has explained it to them, they understand how exactly their actions could have contributed to this whole situation, and decide that they’ll be better about it in the future. Han then decides to drag them back to the room, now that the three of them have had this talk. In theory, should he have said this to all of them? Yes. But that would mean leaving y/n by herself, and that wasn’t a good idea right now.

Walking back to Seungmin’s room, they found that Jeongin had finally been let in, and Changbin had also stopped guarding the door. They took a peek inside the room, finding that the pack was softly talking with each other and y/n as they were scattered on and around the pack beta’s bed.

“It seems you’re doing better y/n. I’m glad.” Chan said, causing the others to notice them.

“Hyungs, Hannie, you’re back!” Felix welcomed the three men back into the room, happy to see them.

The three are quickly beckoned to join them, though Hannie is beckoned to join the beta/omega cuddle pile on the bed. Once he is close enough, Han is pulled into the pile by Felix, and the betas move around to let the omegas curl in the middle of the pile. This is how they all spent the next little while, letting them all relax in the company of the others, and conversation flows easily, but comfortable silences in between those little conversations. The omegas spend this time getting to know y/n better, asking all sorts of questions, wanting to know her better, and the others also occasionally ask their own questions to her as well. It’s more of an interrogation than a conversation, considering that the omega knows more about them, than any of them know about her.

After a while of this silence, Seungmin decided it was time to speak up, knowing that they really needed to talk things out with y/n.

“I think we really need to talk about what happened. I know it’s not easy to talk about it, y/n, but I think it’s something we need to have a conversation about. I know you haven’t known us long, but I hope that we’re able to talk honestly about these things.” Seungmin said, broaching the topic of y/n’s breakdown.

Y/n’s reaction was immediate as she sat up and looked down at her lap, avoiding eye contact with any of them. She took a breath, still not looking at any of them, before she started speaking.

“I started thinking about all of this, all of what’s happened in the last 24 hours. I went from talking to all of you at the fanmeet, and somehow going from that to being here, and not only being here, but Lee Know and Hyunjin coming to my hotel room, and then bringing me here. Then you all let me into your nest. Me, a fan, being let into your nest and then waking up there and I don’t remember how I got there. And then Minho went alpha on me. Neither mine or my omega knew how to process any of that, let alone the fact that you all treat me like pack when you barely know me. Why? Why me? I’m just a normal girl and you’re all Stray Kids. I don’t get it.” She spewed out, her breathing starting to speed up.

The boys looked shocked, though Han and the two eldest alphas looked less shocked than the others. Felix and Hyunjin started tearing up at her words, feeling so bad that they’ve caused her to feel this way. Han thought that he was right on what the cause of her drop and spiral was, and he felt bad that he was right.

“I feel so confused, I feel so at home here with you all, but before I met you all yesterday, I had never been around you at all. I shouldn’t feel this at home with all of you, let alone any of the alphas, but I am. And that terrifies me because I can’t figure out why. I don’t wanna leave, but I can’t help but worry that I’ll have to. Not even that I’ll have to, I will have to leave, I can’t stay here forever. I’m not one of you, I’m not a part of your pack.” She finished, tears dropping down onto her legs.

Chan moved to kneel on the bed in front of her, a hand reaching out to tilt her head up so he could look her in the eyes.

“Your feelings and the way you are feeling is perfectly valid. I want to say that before anything else. I am sorry for treating you like one of us, without any explanations and for going about this as we have been the last 24 hours. We’re at fault for, without a better way to say it, shoving you right in the deep end without saying anything that would have helped you and your omega understand why you went from being a fan at the fansign, to being here with us in our dorm. We’re at fault for that, and we should be the ones begging you for forgiveness.” Chan apologized, while explaining things slightly as well.

“I think why you feel at home with us, is because you’re meant to be one of us, meant to be part of the pack.” Han piped up, all eyes on him. “I said this to Chan-hyung and Minho jagi, but I think why we all took to you so quickly and why you took to us, is because you’re meant to be here, with us, as part of the pack.” He finished, sitting up and looking at y/n as he did so.

Y/n’s eyes had widened during Han’s explanation, and those who were looking at her could see understanding blooming in her eyes as she processed what Han said. She breathed in, wiping away her tears as she took in that they felt the same way she did, and that her feelings weren’t odd. She felt better now about her feelings, now that the boys explained to her what their feelings and thoughts on the situation were, and she expressed her relief to them, that it wasn’t just her, that they felt that way too.

Changbin, sensing that she needed a hug, got up, rounding the bed to sit down behind her as Seungmin pulled Felix out of the way. The buff beta’s arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her into his lap as he kissed the top of her head. She snuggled into his hold, getting comfortable on his lap. The other boys cooed at the two of them, to which y/n blushed, hiding her face in her hands.

This sweet moment couldn’t last, as y/n’s stomach rumbled, signaling that it was definitely time for food. Minho immediately took that as a sign to make food and in his alpha’s eyes, to provide for her. He moved to snatch her from Binnie’s grip, despite the yelling from said man to give her back, and takes her into his arms to take her with him to the kitchen. When he got there, he placed her down on the counter away from the space he’d need for cooking, but close enough that she was around for him to keep an eye on her. He quickly moved around the kitchen, checking what they had in the dorm, and finding that they had a lot, so he set out to make a bunch of different dishes. He made sure to include both spicy and non-spicy dishes, including some less spicy versions of dishes, for both his spice intolerant packmates, and y/n if she also turned out to not be a spicy food person.

As Minho cooked, y/n watched with rapt attention, aware of his every move, interested in watching him cook food for them all, while her omega whispered to her how good of an alpha he was, providing for her and his pack. She tried to move off of the counter once, to try and help the taller man, only for her to be picked right back up and placed on the counter once again.

“Stay here. Don’t move.” He told her, before moving back to cooking.

Soon enough, the others made their way out of the bedroom and into the main living area, some of them checking the kitchen and finding the duo. There were more than a couple teasing remarks made to Minho about his actions, and at least one spoon was thrown in the direction of those who made said remarks. Thankfully, food was quickly finished, and y/n hopped off of the counter, moving to take the plates and dishes out to the table, as Chan managed to find an extra chair for y/n to sit on. Chan sat at the head of the table, with Jeongin at the other end, as the others sat where they could find a spot. Y/n was directed to sit in between Seungmin and Changbin, the two betas keeping her company. The buffer of the two betas piling food onto her plate, making sure she was fed enough, and that the boys wouldn’t eat the rest of the food, leaving her with almost nothing. The conversation flowed as they ate, and not once did y/n feel out of place, they always made every effort to include her, as those that spoke English translated for those that didn’t speak the language as well.

After they had finished, the betas took care of the dishes, as it turned out it was their turn to wash up today. Y/n was walked, well really half-dragged over to the couches in the living room, by the youngest alpha, who decided it was his turn for attention. He sat her down on the smallest couch with him, so no one else could take up her attention, despite the whines and huffs about it from the others. He had a monopoly on her attention, well, until she was stolen by the other two alphas and placed in between them. This eventually ended up in her being surrounded by all eight members, as a movie day was decided on between all of them, with a little bit of everyone’s favorite movies being shown, with the exception of horror movies. Y/n sighed happily as she settled and happily enjoyed the movies and fighting that occurred.

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thousandyearphantombunker · 6 months

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An overly passionate post about Hank Pym and Jan Van Dyne

I’d like to preface this by saying Hank Pym is my favorite Ant-man and that I don’t think he deserves all the hate and controversy he gets, however I’ve noticed a lot of his fans tend to villainize Jan Van Dyne for reasons that I think are personally sort of stupid. A lot of Hank’s fans try to defend him by painting Wasp as a creep who took advantage of him during a psychotic break/the time when he was in that fugue state as Yellowjacket by marrying him during that time- but that’s not how it went down! She married him out during that time out of fear of what he’d do to her (he tried to force harsh kisses on her and sexually harassed her etc) and out of genuine concern! Jan clearly loved Hank and would constantly try and build up his nonexistent self-esteem but didn’t know how- She would try and prop up his ego but kept accidentally feeding into Hank’s weird complexes instead. I will say that Jan flirted with other men a lot but that wasn’t her being unloyal so much as her natural personality- but when you cross that with her being more successful and younger than him and he took that as a sign she wasn’t loyal/thinking she only liked him out of pity or to make herself look better.

She wasn’t manipulating him for her own ends, she wanted to help and have a healthy relationship with him. Still, she didn’t know how to handle the situation properly- Hank needed a therapist, not a girlfriend who thought maybe if she complimented him enough, maybe if she propped him up enough they could be good together- she comes off as a person who had no prior experience with mental illness like this- no frame of reference, no idea what to do, and she didn’t seem to understand what was going on- so she accidentally enabled him and made things worse but she didn’t manipulate him. It’s pretty relatable- If you’ve ever had a mentally ill friend or whatever but had no prior knowledge of mental illness, you tend to mishandle things- you become insensitive/mean without meaning to, or you end up enabling bad behavior- it’s scary and Jan’s case she was in actual physical danger!

I’d also like to say that Hank while not at all stable had some lucidity when he hit Jan, and prior to him hitting Jan he was already displaying emotionally abusive behaviors (Destroying her costume, practically interrogating her) so no you can’t blame it his mental illness- he still had enough awareness of what he was doing (That being said who in there right mind let Hank rejoin the Avengers after he had a severe disassociative episode-I would have demanded he’d go to therapy or be institutionalized if he refused)

I do like Hank, he’s a complex/interesting character. He has an inferiority complex so deep he’s tried to kill himself, he’s made preemptive strikes to prove his worth to others, he gave himself health issues from becoming Giant-man and it’s again tied to his insecurities. Outside of his suicidal tendencies, he’s got anger management issues, suffers paranoid delusions, disassociates, etc. He’s also incredibly self-sacrificing and is a strong believer in second chances- redemption is what he wanted for himself- what he tries to convince others he can have- so he hopes he can give to others too. Also, he’s a badass mad scientist (Literally that’s what sold me on him as a character) but the point still stands he was a domestic abuser, he refused to get help for a long time until it reached a breaking point and his reputation both in-universe and out can’t ever make a full recovery- like I said he’s complicated, so you can’t just paint him as a wife-beater or say absolved of his misdeeds because of his insanity or someone else egging him on, Jan was a victim plain and simple even if you point out some of her enabling behaviors

But my ultimate hot take? EMH’s Hank and Jan are the most annoying couple- separately I loved them but whenever I saw Janet whine or Hank moan about the other all I could think was- “Please, the love of God just break up!”- I was like kid preteen btw and still found that drama annoying

#hank pym #janet van dyne #earths mightiest heroes #avengers academy #the avengers #marvel comics #Wow I practically wrote an essay #Sorry about that #Oh well #Also no grammar #Also sorry about that #If you want a less prettied up depiction of mental illness I do recommend Hank he's a good character #If you can stomach some potentially triggering stuff

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viarayy01-blog · 8 months

Text

Blades Of Grass: Oneshot Fic —— ao3 link here

Summary:

Cassie asks Gregory about his scar when she catches him disassociating at the park.

"Gregory?"

Gregory quickly refocused into the room and locked eyes with Cassie.

"Yeah? What's up?" He dropped his hand from his face and gave her a questioning stare.

Cassie bit her lip and interlocked her fingers. "You're doing it again." Gregory drew his eyebrows together.

"Doing what?" Cassie frowned at him and scoffed. "What?" Gregory exclaimed. He threw his hands up in the air and waited for an explanation.

Cassie rolled her eyes and grabbed hold of his face. Gregory immediately tensed up.

"I knew it." She said sternly, eyeing something on his cheek. Gregory pushed her hands away and leaned backward.

"Woah.. what are you doing? A little warning, please." He laughed nervously. She clicked her tongue and shook her head.

"Why do you do that? Doesn't it hurt?" Gregory blinked in confusion.

"I have absolutely no idea what you talking about. Mind letting me in on whatever inquiry led to you manhandling my skull like that?" Cassie maintained her serious poise. Her green nails tapped nervously against her jean shorts.

She cleared her throat and looked away. "Your scar. On your cheek? You were scratching at it again." Gregory's eyebrows shot up and he too turned away.

"Oh uh... I really wasn't." That wasn't entirely true. It had become a nervous habit to fiddle with the once deep wound on his right cheek. Sometimes he did it without noticing.

Cassie scoffed again and crossed your arms. "Liar. I watched you do it." Gregory winced and drummed his foot against the ground. The two sat in silence and awkwardly waited for the moment to pass.

"Hey! You're doing it again!" Cassie yelled. Gregory swiftly moved his hand as far away from his head as he could.

"Nuh uh. I wasn't." Cassie groaned in response, reaching over to grab his now outstretched hand.

"Yuh huh. Can't fool me, Gregory." He made a move to pull his hand from her grasp but she only held tighter.

"The side of your face is all red. Why do you do that?" Her eyes were full of worry and concern.

Gregory signed and slid his hand into hers. "It's fine Cas, really. It's just a nervous habit." He chewed on the inside of his mouth and prayed she wouldn't question any further.

Her face fell and she released his hand. "I wish you would tell me about the things that bothered you, instead of keeping it to yourself." She placed her hands in her lap and stared at them.

"I feel like I don't even know that much about you. I know we haven’t known eachother for that long but… i’m just feeling like I have the short end of the stick here." Gregory grit his teeth. "I mean, you’ve stayed at my house so long that at this point you practically live there. I’m not saying your not welcome, we love to have you, I just wish you would talk to me. Sometimes I wonder if you even want to be my friend. I don’t know what to think about you anymore.”

Cassie's lip wobbled and Gregory did his best to maintain eye contact. All he wanted was to turn away and pretend he hadn’t heard.

He dug his hands into the edge of his shirt and watched uncomfortably as Cassie wiped her eyes. “Sorry. That was stupid. Just ignore what I said.” She weakly grinned. She stood up off the grass and tightly closed her hands as she turned away from Gregory.

Tears built in the corner of her eyes as Gregory stood up and grabbed her hand.

“Don’t just get up like that. It wasn’t stupid.” He calmly stated. Cassie looked distrustful. Her hands were cold against his.

“Just… just come sit down with me again. I haven’t been a good friend lately.” He grinned lightly and pulled the both of them back onto the damp grass. Cassie held her knees to her chest and looked off into the distance. The tips of her hair were slightly wet with tears.

Gregory let out a nervous sigh and leaned against his arm.

“If i’m being honest, I’m not really sure how I got this scar.” Cassie perked up and turned her head to face him. “All I remember was waking up with this huge cut on my face that was so deep you could almost see my jaw bone. The stinging lasted for weeks.

“I had no way to disinfect the cut, since I was still in the alleyway on 6th street, but I managed to find some unused bandaids and some medical tape and it did the job. Sometimes it would flare up and it was so painful all I could do was curl up on the floor and wait for it to pass.

“I used to keep it covered up, but eventually the skin healed over the cut and I thought it kinda made me look badass.” Cassie giggled and Gregory felt himself grin in turn. “I got so used it it being uncovered that whenever I got nervous, I started to scratch at it. I know I shouldn’t do it— but it kinda makes me feel safe? Like, I know there’s no injury I could get that would ever feel as bad as that did.” Cassie outstretched her legs and took a deep inhale. Gregory crossed his and waited for her response.

“Thank you.” She said simply. “For uhm… feeling safe enough with me to tell me that. I know that was a really personal story, Gregory. Thanks for trusting me with it.” She shyly smiled at him and pulled him into a hug. Startled, he let her arms hang around him for a second.

“Promise me you’ll tell me more stories like that someday. I’m here for you, okay?” Gregory felt pressure behind his eyes and blinked a few times. “And, you’re not a bad friend. In fact, you’re the best. I’m very lucky to have you, Greg.”

Soon enough, blinks weren’t enough to stop Gregory’s eyes from watering the back of Cassie’s shirt. He lifted his hands around her and held on tight.

“I promise, Cass. Forever and ever.”

#fnaf #my fic #fnaf fic #fanfiction #five night at freddy's #security breach #fnaf ruin #fnaf cassie #fnaf gregory #oneshot #ao3 fanfic #character study #my fic writing #my fanfiction #wrote this late at night when writers block randomly decided to stop killing me #five nights at freddys #fnaf security breach #fnaf sb

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mystargirl-interlude · 1 year

Note

heyyyyyyyyy, thx for following me I was wondering if you could do a request where Xavier meets the reader as Wednesday’s sister and they date behind her back before she finds out and Enid has to convince her to be okay with it.

hiii thank you so much for your request I hope this if fulfills your expectations!!

I was listening to thunder while writing this so if you want the full experience listen to thunder

Requested: yes

Warning: none I don’t think?

Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x fem!reader

Word count: 941

Proofread: no

Thunder

completely moving schools because your twin decided it would be fun to try and kill a group of jocks isn't all that fun.

I was completely fine staying at the school we were at but when Wednesday got expelled I got expelled with her for not doing anything to stop her.

We ended up getting thrown in the same school mother and father went to Nevermore boarding .

Me and Wednesday are fraternal twins hence why we look nothing alike despite us not looking anything alike doesn't mean we are complete opposites I just tend to show more emotions which is why switching to Nevermore had such an impact on me.

Once we pulled into the driveway to the castle like school my I could feel my stomach twist with nerves while my parents looked ecstatic about us living the life they once lived

After zoning out most of the car ride I finally came back to my senses

"This looks like a hell hole" were the first words to come out of my mouth

"I would have to agree sister" says Wednesday with a deathly look in her eyes

"Come on girls you can continue on the Addams name" mother says

"And live in your shadow?" Me and Wednesday say in sync as a rhetorical question

I tend to disassociate quite often and didn't start paying attention until we were with some blonde girl named Enid

"That over there is Bianca the closest thing nevermore has to royalty, but lately her crowns been slipping, she used to date Nevermore's tortured artist Xavier Thorpe" she says pointing over to his direction

I see a long haired male painting what it looks like crows I can't seem to look away as he turn around as we make eye contact and unfortunately as Enid continues her tour I have to be the first to break it.

That leads us to where we are now

*two months later*

“Do you think if Wednesday caught us she would be mad?”

“It’s unpredictable when it comes to Wednesday”

ੈ✩‧₊˚

Me and Xavier entered the weathervane making our presence known with the little bell above the door

“Go sit down I’ll order” he says

This was a weekly ritual for us, since we can’t be public about our relationship yet this was the only way we had alone time

I look up to see Xavier come my way

“Okay here’s your drink”

“Thank you” I smile

“Do you ever wish that we didn’t have to sneak off every time we want to be together?” He asks

“Yeah.. all the time, but I don’t know what would happen if we didn’t. Like I know the world won’t blow up, but I just don’t want my sister to hate me.”

“Let’s talk about something else”

I replied

“Did you hear that Eugene has a crush on Enid???”

I say

“No fucking way”

I nod

“That’s actually hilarious, isn’t he like 13?”

He says

“Yeah! I kinda feel bad but it’s too funny”

He chuckled as he reached over to softly kiss me.

We stay like that for a while paying no mind to the bell ring announcing someone walking in

“Does someone want to explain what is going on or am I going to have to bring out my ropes”

I hear a familiar voice say

“WEDNESDAY”

Xavier says breaking apart from my lips clearly shocked

I look over to see Wednesday standing in front of our table tense with her eye twitching next to a very confused enid

“Uhm Wednesday I promise I can explain-“

“Can you?” She cuts me off

“I’ll wait”

“Wednesday maybe we should just leave them be they looked like they were happy” Enid says trying to grab Wednesday

“Touch me again and I will make sure your hand never gets to touch anything again”

Wednesday say

“Mm” Enid squeals

“Wednesday I know you don’t like this school or anyone in it but I do, I really do and I enjoy hanging out with everyone and I enjoy the classes and I enjoy the people and quite frankly I really like Xavier.”

You say

“I am going to go back to the dorms. I do not want to see either one of you.” Wednesday says as she walks out

“Im so sorry, I’ll talk to her” Enid cringes as she quickly catches us to Wednesday

“Oh god oh god” I rub my hands over my face

“Hey shes your sister she’s not going to be mad forever” Xavier says

“ you clearly don’t know Wednesday, she holds grudges for forever” I sigh

A few hours later

We were all in Wednesday and Enid shared dorm room

“ Wednesday whether you like it or not your sister is going to find someone she loves and someone who loves her back and even if you don’t want that to happen it’s going to be the same for you” Enid says

Wednesday slowly looks up and this is the most emotion I’ve seen her have other than when her scorpion died but it quickly goes away as her face hardens and she quickly walks towards Xavier

She gets really close to him as she quietly says

“If you ever hurt her I will tie you up and make sure you have a slow excruciating death” she says just loud enough for Xavier to hear.

Xavier quickly nods as Wednesday gives him a side eye and nods towards me.

I smile as I see her walk out

“Well, personally I think that went well” I said as Enid nods in agreement

“Uh yeah sure” Xavier says, scratching the back of his head.

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe x fem!reader #percy hynes white #wednsday addams #xavier thorpe fic #xavier thorpe smut #xavier x reader #xavier x you #xavier thorpe x you

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battleangelaelita · 3 months

Text

Yet another post-canon Azula plot bunny

This time, with 100% more trans fem energy.

I've actually had this one for a while, and discussed it at length with @jusendork on discord. But due to an unfortunate run-in with malware, and discord support being useless as ever, my account and all the dm convos are lost forever now, so I figured I'd put it up on here so the idea itself does not fall down the memory hole.

So this came as a result of my unfortunate tendency to write right up to the line about trans adjacent characters, but never really go all the way despite being trans fem myself (see every Ranma 1/2 fanfic I have ever written). So this ones for all my sisters out there.

We begin the fic ten years after the ending of ATLA, and we're just going to sidestep the comics. The inciting incident is an attempt on the life of Fire Lord Zuko; the plot fails, but with as of yet no heir, the Fire Lord is in a politically difficult situation.

Wanting to settle this matter discretely, Zuko turns to his old friends to find the whereabouts of his sister, to determine whether she had any part in the plot, and if not, to return her safely to the capital so that there will be a line of succession. Unfortunately for him, he's a bit hard up for people able and willing to help. Ultimately, only Katara, ambassador from the Southern Water Tribe, and Mai are able and willing, no matter how reluctantly.

I've decided to borrow one note from the comics and have Zuko have split with Mai. Whether he is married to someone else for political reasons, I have not decided. The first leg will be told primarily from Katara's point of view as the outsider to the family dynamics. In the search, she's trying to peel back the layers of resentment and secrets. Mai knows more than she let's on.

Azula herself has been living under an assumed name in Ba Sing Se, disappearing into the anonymous mass with the help of a few of the former Dai Li who remained loyal. I've mulled various different trades she may have plied to survive, from organized crime to more reputable trades, but ultimately they are not important. The key is that she's basically been disassociating the past ten years, and the sudden arrival of people from her past dredges up everything she's been trying to forget.

The keystone of all this is that Azula is a trans girl, and it always was a sordid little secret of the royal family. Her father's (selective) affirmation of this was just another part of controlling her. From the moment his 'son' made 'his' first flames when 'his' mother humored 'his' protestations, Ozai saw an opportunity. 'Azulon' the Younger can play at being a girl, but only if she's the best. And she certainly can't go back on filial piety.

The main theme of it will be transmisogyny in all its forms. And I'd hope to do it in such a way that conserves the scenes in the original; events occur as they did in the show proper, but flashbacks are of course in full unreliable narrator. So the changes would be things that recontextualize events, not change them.

This is of course one of those ideas I may not actually get around to, so please don't stop if you're thinking along similar lines or if you got inspiration from this. But I really just had a good hard think about how Azula in fanon gets this sort of degendering; a character commonly perceived as a cis lesbian, and the commonalities lesbians have with trans women in how they're treated for existing outside the bounds of patriarchal norms, treated as violent, predatory, emotionally unstable, and masculinized. So i thought I'd just steer into this skid, and write her as a trans lesbian, because I can. There's few things as subversive as treating a character as having been trans and passing the entire time.

#azula #fanfic idea #atla #transfem

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diabolicalcunt · 1 month

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I feel the need to pin this cause I’ve always been notorious for people loving me when they first meet me, and then finding out that my political views are not extremely liberal. So here’s all the reasons you will hate me once you get to know me. Or not. I honestly don’t care I’m just sick of the ‘You aren’t who I made you out be in my head!’ conversations.

So my unpopular opinions in no order-

1. They/them is something that’s being encouraged by big brother to see yourself as non or less human.

2. DID isn’t real and you just disassociate a specific way. I look like I’ve been drugged cause I fall down ‘inside’ myself like a well and have no reaction time and can barely speak. I’m like a sloth. You pretend to be a anime character. It’s just coping.

3. The concept of trans genocide is fear mongering by big brother and means to keep boundaries between social groups.

4. To build off 3, the push to medically transition underage children is a move by big pharmaceutical companies to create a permanent customer. Because whether you decide to stay transitioned or de transition, you’re going to be on medication for the rest of your life whether you like it or not. There’s also the whole issue with child exploitation. You’ll be judgmental against Dance Moms, but you won’t say anything about a mom who transitioned her child when they were two years old and made them a social media star.

5. Trans men and women who have been charged with a crime belong in LGBT prison wings. Because we have created a culture where male rapists can put on its dress and be rewarded with a permanent stay in the hen house where they can victimize more women and the system will just cry transphobia and call the victims liars. You got a problem with that? I have never seen a trans man pushing to get put in men’s prison. I wonder why… 😐

6. Blair White is queen.

7. I will fight Henry Cavill on sight. I don’t give a shit how bad you want motorboat him. He’s a fucking pedophile.

8. Same goes for David Bowie. When I get to the afterlife I’m gonna make him wish he could die again. Ask me if you want my full on sight list. 😂

9. I stand with Palestine. Yes I think Islam is a horrible religion that is anti woman. I still don’t think kids should die for the grievances of adults and I think it’s fucked up Israel is doing the same shit Nazis did to them and expect us to nod and smile!

10. Qu**r is just as much of a slur as f*g*t or n*gg*r. I don’t use it and if you do I will block you no questions asked. Say gay! Say lesbian! Say…bisexual! 😱

11. Butch women are valid as fuck and I adore y’all . They aren’t trans men, fuck your lesbian phobia.

12. To build off 11, the new LGBT movement has been infected by woke homophobia and the new trans movement is nothing but conversion therapy in a mask.

13 . Radical feminists are women’s last hope.

14. Marvel movies always sucked, we were just kids and ate up the pretty colors.

15. Dune is a white male savior story.

16. Your fave is not autistic, trans, gay or whatever. You just need validation cause you have no confidence.

17. The Boys should have never cast Jensen Ackles and the Supernatural fandom needs psychological help.

18. Too many of y’all try to primp and posture as the gods of your fandom and yes I say that as someone who did the same and stepped away when I realized how cringe I was. Lording over autistic adults and actual children is pathetic. Get therapy and a real hobby.

19. While gender neutral fanfiction has its place. The trend that all fanfiction needs to be gender neutral is literally killing the creativity and frankly the spice to fanfiction. I hate this trend where piece of media needs to be sterilized so it can be consumed by anyone, even people just passing by. It goes against the concept of creating at its core. Sometimes things are made for specific groups. Sometimes it’s made just for you. The things you create do not need to be sanitized to the point there’s no substance, just a hollow consumption. Think of it this way. Would you rather have a hot pizza of your preference or would you prefer to just drink a bowl of water because someone on the other side of the world might not like pizza?

20. The WWE Divas belt was iconic. I get the whole take women wrestlers seriously movement and I agree! But god damn it, it’s a Bratz belt!!! Gimme!!!!!

21. I fucking HATE koalas. They literally only exist because humans have dumped millions of dollars and keeping them alive. If natural selection were allowed to take his course, they would’ve died off 100 years ago. The food they consume has so little nutrition that they have evolved to have the smallest brain to cranium capacity of any animal to create a built in helmet!! Why? Cause they are so stupid they literally fall out of trees and drop their infants!!! They shit on their young and have permanent diarrhea due to the 0 nutrition thing. They carry chlamydia. They’re so fucking stupid they can’t fuck and have to be artificially inseminated to continue the population. If I couldn’t get laid on my own, the government would not drop millions of dollars into making sure I do!! So why did koalas get it? Literally a waste of resources that could be going to feed thousands of hungry children and instead we’re keeping a fucking retarded (I’m on the spectrum fuck you) animal alive who should have gone extinct hundreds of years ago cause it’s supposedly ‘cute’!! God! I hate koalas!

#get to know me #unpopular opinion

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lizzie-is-here · 2 years

Text

like the dawn

part vii- the apartment

“where does memory end and love begin? all i know is- she loved him before she remembered him.” - ritika jyala

summary: you and bucky are on the run when the un gets bombed and pinned on him, but a certain idiot with a shield is determined to save you.

wordcount: 5.1k

warnings: violence, cussing, brainwashing, brief disassociation, memory loss, mentions of torture, civil war fix it fic time, me being too distracted by how hot sebastian stan is to focus on grammar

taglist: @whelvedfeelingsstuff @sebsgirl71479 @rebloggingmyrecs @babyblublossom @local-mr-frog @thenyxsky @capsiclesdoll

a/n: yall this is mostly setup but it took so long so i’m sorry, 🥺. college has been wild so far istg but my math professor is gay and ranted about marshmallows for ten minutes so we stan him. anyway hope u enjoy love u lots 🤍🤍 go slay

previous part | series masterlist | next part

Being the most wanted people in the world while also not knowing who you were was no picnic.

After leaving Steve Rogers, healed but still hurting, on the banks of the Potomac, you and Bucky ran. After being forced to split up for a week while he snuck on planes and you cleared hundreds of miles by air, you reunited in London.

“This is… horrible,” you grumble, perched atop a roof as Winter, no, Bucky climbs up to join you. He nods before holding up a battered notebook.

“Next on the to-do list, we raid the base in Siberia.” You shiver, brief flashes of your time there surfacing. It was so strange relearning yourself. Your time as HYDRA’s scythe felt like a dream, like you’d really been sleeping the whole time.

Fighting away their brainwashing felt like fighting off fatigue—a losing battle.

“I know it’s not going to be fun, but there’s keys to our past there. We both remember that.” You know he’s right. And when neither of you remember much, you have to play the cards you were sure on.

Your wings flutter, tired and strained. Memories flicker in and out.

“(Y/N)?”

Who?

A hand touches your cheek and you jolt, eyes widening. The man in front of you stays steady.

“Hey, hey it’s me. It’s me, Bird.”

Bucky. Your brain catches up and a searing pain shoots through your head. He catches you as you curl in on yourself, making sure you stay quiet so as to not draw attention to the roof you’re camping on.

“Hey, hey doll, I lost you there for a second,” he murmurs. You take deep breaths, chuckling shakily.

The nickname tugs a buried memory to the surface. Countless girls he’d take on dates, the pet name eventually falling so casually from his lips when addressing you, his little habit rubbing off on Steve.

“Haven’t heard that in a while,” you quip, relaxing as the pain subsides.

He snorts. “What can I say? I’m old-fashioned.”

“Oh, shush.” You shove him, laughing freely. You’ll take every moment you can get. “Well, if we’ve got another journey ahead of us, we best get going.”

Bucky grabs his stolen backpack full of your and his notebooks, hoisting it effortlessly as he stands next to you. “Wouldn’t you rather get a car? You have to be tired from flying.” He’s right, you are. But you aren’t used to being given a choice.

He notices your hesitation. “(Y/N), you’re allowed to rest.”

You give in. “Yeah, a car would be nice.” You’ve both been reminding each other to not push your limits too far, but HYDRA’s training would be hard to break. One step at a time. “If I’m honest, if I fly much further, I think my wings will fall off.”

You both jump down from the roof, sneaking through the dimly-lit streets until you find an inconspicuous car. Bucky goes to hotwire it as you keep a watchful eye on your surroundings. He taps the hood to get your attention.

“Can you get me some light here?” Nodding, you lift a hand. You feel the energy move through your veins, tracing along them until a ball of warm light forms above your fingers. You carefully lower it to where he points, illuminating the mechanics.

“I’m glad this is of some use,” you mumble, effortlessly manipulating the light that doesn’t seem to quite obey physics. You’re still not sure whether to be amazed or repulsed by it.

Bucky, on the other hand, has his mind made up. Maybe it’s some sort of instinct or habit ingrained, but your powers offer a familiarity. A constant source of literal and metaphorical light over the past decades.

But he knows he’ll just sound like a hypocrite if he says anything (He hasn’t been particularly kind to himself or his metal prosthetic), so he finishes hotwiring the beat-up vehicle and opens your door for you.

New cars are so strange. They're sleek, streamlined. Some of them, “sports cars”, look even stranger. They have screens and buttons and heated seats, plus the seats are much better than what they were.

You climb into the backseat, lowering the passenger seat all the way, and feebly attempt to make yourself comfortable. There’s some awkward adjusting before you finally settle, but once you’re clear of the city, both of you relax.

It takes a few days of risky gas station stops and sleeping in the car before you decide to leg it, abandoning the car in favor of walking the last miles. The journey comes easily, and by the time you arrive at the base, you’re ready for whatever waits inside.

Or so you think. The door is closed, and a pin pad taunts you. But as if on autopilot, you punch in the code you don’t remember. It’s right. The door swings open.

Bucky tugs a gun from his jacket and you ready your powers.

“You ready?” you ask.

“Yeah,” he lies. “You?”

“Yeah.” You do the same. The halls are suspiciously quiet. There aren’t any wandering guards like you remember. No screams from other soldiers or bustling doctors.

It’s abandoned.

Pointing down a hallway, you and Bucky sneak around, unwilling to take risks. Especially when you’re already risking so much by coming back here for a few items. You finally make it to a storage room, and your eyes land on two boxes immediately.

They’re labeled as Sgt. James Barnes and Agent (Y/N) (L/N), to your pleasant surprise. Hurriedly snatching them up, you’re gone as quickly as you came, racing back to the car. You don’t dare view the contents. Not yet, at least.

It’s an hour later, driving along a snowy road, when you finally speak up.

“Where do we go?” You don’t even want to ask. You know what has to happen. Laying low, jumping from place to place every time you’re found out. You aren’t sure if you can live on the run, not to mention that you won’t be able to fly often, seeing how surveilled most cities are now.

“There’s a safe house in Romania,” Bucky says. ”Bucharest. It’s a good hiding spot. Plus, we could sneak you out every now and then for a fly.” You nod, watching the trees grow more and more crowded.

Even if it takes time, you know you’ll have to accept that you’re very lucky. And even if you’ll be stuck in some dingy apartment for the foreseeable future, it’ll give you time to piece your memory together.

Your history and all of your memories, contained in some cheap, leather-bound journals.

———————————————————————

That was almost a year ago. You and Bucky had set up a nice life in Bucharest.

You had a one-room apartment with a mattress, a couch, and some pots and pans. You’d even managed to get some houseplants that were thriving on the windowsill. You suspect your powers keep them healthy.

It wasn’t much. Most would look at it and scoff. But it’s undeniably and entirely yours. And that’s what matters.

You’ve spent a lot of time holed up. Your wings are too big for you to go out in the day, so you spend your time relearning old skills and putting together the pieces of your story.

In the boxes you brought back was your longbow, both of your dog tags, your original uniforms, and some pictures, plus one of your journals that you had brought along when you went awol. The items helped with your memories, providing tangible evidence of your past. You both always wear the dog tags.

Your life before HYDRA was still hazy. You remembered Steve and Bucky, their parents, your parents. Some of your time in school, though it was rather boring.

You remembered Steve constantly getting into fights and you and Bucky always saving his ass from men twice his size.

But mostly, you remember HYDRA. Years of training are stuck in your head. You know your way around every gun you can think of, you’re more proficient with a knife than a pen. Firing a bow is like breathing.

You speak over twenty languages. You can play instruments you never learned. And for some strange reason, you know how to make a mean caramel frappuccino.

After relearning how to properly clean your wings, something HYDRA did a rather shitty job of, you discovered they weren’t just black. Hints of other colors shone through in the light.

Purples, blues, greens, even some deep red. Something beautiful that had been kept from you.

True to his word, Bucky sneaks you out once every two weeks to a secluded area with no cameras, and watches you fly. He finds it absolutely amazing, even if he can’t put the words together to tell you.

What HYDRA did to him left him scarred. A gaudy prosthetic that was fused to his bones, constant radiating pain and scar tissue where metal met muscle.

But you, you were golden.

Even if you despised your enhancements some days, Bucky was in awe of them.

The way you healed his cuts when he tried cooking, how the lights would brighten and flicker when you laughed, the fact that you trusted him to carefully preen your wings when HYDRA had only treated them with carelessness.

Even if he knew what he was feeling, he shoved it down. That word wasn’t even in the question when you were in the situation you were in.

So he stays silent. He sits patiently on the couch as he waits for you to wake up. Today is grocery day. And even if you won’t get to go to the market, he doesn’t want you to wake up alone. That never ends well for either of you.

“Bird?” he asks. You used to be able to sleep through even the worst thunderstorms. The slightest of sounds wake you up now. You shuffle, yawning and lazily sitting up.

“Hey,” you mumble. The mattress creaks and groans as you stand up, peeking at the windows covered in newspaper. “You’re heading out?”

He nods. He tugs on a jacket and a baseball cap before holding his arms out. You hug him like you do every time he goes out; like it’s the last time you’ll see him.

Bucky promises to be back soon and hurries from the building before your neighbor, a nosy old woman, gets up to check her mail. Left to your own devices, you start getting ready.

A few feathers are a bit unruly, so you take a moment to preen them, carefully rearranging them and swiping away dust. There are a few you can’t reach, but you’ll ask Bucky to get them later.

You tug on some clothes that you’ve modified to work around your wings and brush your teeth. Just as you rinse the brush and go to fold your blanket, you hear a noise outside the door.

It doesn’t sound like Bucky. Silently grabbing a tactical knife hidden in the couch, you hide behind the door. Some clicking. The lock being picked.

The door swings open. Staying hidden, you watch a man beeline for one of Bucky’s journals atop the fridge. He flips through it. You don’t notice the shield at his side, too focused on, one: how this man got into your home, and two: how to get him out.

Taking the opportunity, you strike, slamming him against the wall and pushing the knife up against his throat.

It’s only when you meet his eyes that you recognize him. Still, you don’t quite let up.

“What are you doing here?” you demand. “How did you find me?”

Steve holds up his hands, slowly removing his shield and setting it on the ground. “Do you know who I am?”

Of course you know. How couldn’t you?

“Answer my question, Steve,” you spit. Both of you know that you won’t hurt him. But he’s still in your safe house, going through your shit.

“Bucky’s in danger.” That’s all he has to say before you release him.

“What?” Tucking the knife in your pocket, you begin to rummage around the room. You throw on some shoes and gather up the journals before stuffing them into an empty backpack and slinging both it and your bow over your shoulders. Meanwhile, Steve explains the situation.

The Accords, how he refused to sign. Peggy’s recent death. You had no idea she was still alive. Though you feel slightly guilty about not visiting, you aren’t sure she would have wanted to see you anyway. Not after you had participated in corrupting her organization.

Steve goes on to tell you about the bombing at a UN meeting, and how surveillance cameras caught the Winter Soldier leaving the scene.

“He didn’t do it,” you promise. The blond nods.

“Ok, but-”

“What are you doing here?” Bucky. He stands in the doorway, hands empty of groceries. When Steve fails to respond, he turns to you. “They think I bombed the UN, I don’t know what’s going on, but we need to get out of here.”

Steve shakes his head. “You won’t make it, they’ve surrounded the building.”

“I wasn’t in Vienna,” Bucky says. “I don’t do that anymore.”

“Well, the people who think you did are coming here now. And they’re not planning on taking you alive. Either of you.”

You nod. “That’s smart. Good strategy.” Your heart is racing. No matter how good you were, you wouldn’t be able to sneak out of this. Footsteps echo above you.

“Buck, (Y/N), this doesn’t have to end in a fight.” Always the optimist. It’s easy for him to say. He’s been a diplomat, a leader. You’ve been shadows and assassins.

Bucky voices what you’re thinking. “It always ends in a fight.”

“You pulled me from the river and healed me.” Steve’s getting impatient. “Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do.”

Flash bombs fly through the windows. You deflect one with a blast of light, while another bounces off of Steve’s shield. You hear soldiers attempting to batter down the door while Bucky grabs the mattress and uses it to shield you both from a rain of bullets.

You fling a metal table towards the door to stall, but more soldiers break in the windows. It’s a blur as gunfire and yelling fill the small room. A punch here, a dodge there. Bucky kicks a man off the balcony before Steve stops him.

“Buck, stop!” he shouts. “You’re gonna kill someone.”

The brunet flips him, punching a hole into the floor where you stashed away the other backpack. “I’m not gonna kill anyone.” Passing it to you, he nods out the broken windows. “Идти. Придерживайтесь плана [Go. Stick to the plan].”

You leap, trusting that your wings will carry you even if you haven’t flown in a while. They ache as you stretch, but you soar to the roof of the next building nonetheless.

Bucky comes flying out from the apartment building moments later, and you pass off the backpack as you begin to run. When you glance at the ground, however, you spot a shadow.

You blast the attacker back before they even land, only to spot a man in what looked like a black… cat costume? Bucky raced to attack him, exchanging blows before he was kicked backward into an electrical box.

Alright, this guy was an issue. The bigger issue was the helicopter firing round after round at you. The man who had helped Steve, the Falcon, takes it out with little trouble, allowing you and Bucky to leap down.

You fly but stay close enough to help, grabbing his hand and diving down into a tunnel to avoid more gunfire. Cars swerve around you.

Once more you run in tandem, with you using your wings to boost your already-enhanced speed. The cat man follows, as does Steve.

Sirens wail through the tunnel while Bucky leaps over cars, never slowing down.

“Motorcycle,” you warn him. In one motion, he grabs the bike while you safely land the driver, before hopping on and speeding off. Now that he’s more mobile, you take to the air again, maneuvering expertly in the tight space.

You stay a bit behind, blasting at police cars that get too close. The light does little but distract them, slowing them down enough to put space in between you. You swerve to the side just as the cat man jumps at you, and he and Bucky begin to fight while speeding at 40 mph.

“Take the roof out!” he yells once he kicks him away. The moment he's out, you do just that, tossing an explosive onto a weak spot on the concrete. It crumbles, but the man in the cat suit is tossed forward and slashes the back tire of the motorcycle.

You’re ready to fire off a blast of light that won’t be so harmless, but he’s tackled away by Steve. You help Bucky up as police cars surround you. No exits. They’ve got the skies covered too.

A man in a silver suit descends from above. You spot heavy artillery.

“Stand down, now,” he demands. Shit.

Bucky reaches an arm out in front of you while Steve does the same for him, as if you’re back saving the latter from some bully and not definitely getting put in prison for countless felonies.

“Congratulations, Cap,” the man says. “You’re a criminal.”

The soldiers grab Bucky first, harshly pushing him onto the ground. You’re about to protest when they do the same to you, grabbing at your wings to keep you from flying off. You wince but sink to the ground anyway.

So much for a safe house.

———————————————————————

You were shoved in a glass cage, which was then shoved in an armored vehicle. Never mind the sturdy metal cuffs clamped on your wrists, ankles, and shoulders.

When they rolled you out, it was in a different building. You see a similar cage and a familiar mess of unwashed brown hair in front of you, plus a dejected-looking blond Captain to your left, and groan inwardly.

You get placed into the same room as Bucky, to your surprise. They don’t tell you what’s going on or what will happen.

After maybe five minutes, a small man walks in. He has a briefcase that seems stuffed full, but he only pulls out a few files. Psychological evaluation.

He turns to Bucky first, then you. “Your first name is James? And (Y/N)?” No response. “I’m not here to judge you. I just want to ask you a few questions. Do you know where you are, James?”

Seeing as he’s the one being accused, they’re more interested in him. And his lack of responses. “I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me, James.”

“My name is Bucky.”

A sliver of a smile makes its way onto your face, even if you know the cameras caught it.

“Tell me, Bucky. You’ve seen a great deal, haven’t you?”

He only deadpans. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

You frown, but not because of his words. The doctor’s questions… he’s purposely testing you both.

“You fear that if you open your mouth, the horrors might never stop. Don’t worry. We only have to talk about one.” In an instant, the lights go out.

You speak up. “What the hell is this?”

“Why don’t we discuss your home?” he says to both of you. “Not Romania. Certainly not Brooklyn, no.” Reaching into his bag, he retrieves a book you hoped was long burned.

“I mean your real home.”

It’s like watching a nightmare unfold. Because for all of the horrible things you saw in HYDRA, you never had to watch this. The trigger words.

“Желание [Longing].”

Bucky’s voice is shaking as you try to break out of the cuffs.

“No.”

“Ржавый [Rusted].”

“Shut up!” you yell, hands glowing as you try to overheat the mechanism locking you in place. But all you do is nearly burn yourself. Even if you can withstand the heat of your own powers, glowing metal isn’t in the question. Instead, you try to fire a beam at the glass. A tiny crack forms.

“Семнадцать [Seventeen].” You hear a whir. His metal arm. He’s just as desperate as you are.

“Stop,” he pleads. You shoot blast after blast, trying to shut it out once Bucky starts screaming in pure frustration and fear.

“Рассвет [Daybreak],” the doctor spits, rolling the word on his tongue. The words are clearly practiced, not known.

The metal cuffs finally snap under Bucky’s strength and he immediately begins punching the glass. The doctor never stops. “Печь [Furnace].”

Your attempts at escape are pointless. This cage is too well-designed and your strength is draining with every trigger word said. Partially because you have to watch Bucky succumb to the Winter Soldier, but also because you know it’ll be your turn next.

When the door flies from the cage next to you, and the man stands up, you recognize the Soldier instantly. “Солдат [Soldier]?”

“Я готов отвечать [Ready to comply].” The doctor nods in satisfaction and flips to a new page. He shines his flashlight towards you, frowning as it flickers wildly.

“Свет [Light],” he begins. Something inside of you awakens.

Each trigger word was chosen specifically and through testing, It took months to find just the right combination of words that destroyed your mind.

“Небо [Sky], прирост [growth], начало [dawn], восемнадцать [eighteen].” You scream as you feel your consciousness slipping. Your memory grows fuzzier with each second. The worst part may be watching the Winter Soldier’s face twist in concern. Even in this state, he knows you.

“Душа [Soul], девять [nine], испытующий [searching], один [one]...”

It hurts so badly to hold on and fight the brainwashing. And as much as you don’t want to give in, this was never a fair fight. With the last word, you let go.

“Ущелье [Ravine].”

The first thing you do is assess the area. Wherever it is you’ve been brought seems high-risk. Cameras are down, and you’re stuck in a cage.

Charging up a powerful blast with no regard to the discomfort it brings you, you burst through the cuffs restraining you and the ballistic glass. The shards cover the ground, reflecting the red lights that flash intermittently.

The man in front of you grins, tucking a book under his arm.

“Mission report. December 16, 1991.”

———————————————————————

Steve’s stomach only sinks as he passes the bodies piled in the hall. When he finally gets to the containment room, he spots two empty cages and the “doctor” on the floor.

He wrestles him to his feet, demanding answers with none of his usual diplomacy.

“Who are you? What do you want?”

The man chuckles. “To see an empire fall.”

Sam’s just entering the room when the Winter Soldier strikes, knocking out a chunk of concrete from the wall. You emerge from the shadows, grabbing the man and flinging him at the cages.

The Captain goes for the Soldier first, swinging in wide arcs. When he manages to knock him over, you step in, your hand straining as you charge up a ball of energy. The blond holds a hand out as if to calm you, but you ignore it.

You fire smaller rays all while feeling the one in your left hand grow more erratic. When he’s backed up against an elevator, you strike.

A powerful blast sends the Captain blasting through the elevator door and down the shaft. Satisfied, you go back for your partner.

You and the Winter Soldier eventually make it to a dining area of the building. Some guards swarm in, but without your memory, any qualms you had about hurting people are long gone. You don’t care who lives or dies so long as you escape.

A deafening sound rings through the air and you both wince, turning to see the source when a man flashes a disorienting light. Two could play that game. You return the favor as the Soldier grabs his gun, barely missing and being quickly disarmed. He kicks him back with little effort, and the smaller man flies into a chair.

A blonde woman rushes up next, followed by a redhead. She seems familiar, but you can’t remember where from. Either way, they’re both taken out with little effort.

And then a new man appears. He moves in a way that tells you he isn’t quite human, and when he leaps a railing to catch up to you and the Soldier, your suspicions are confirmed. They’re tumbling down the stairs before either one wins, but the Winter Soldier is gone just as quickly as you are.

Flying around walkways and crashing through glass, you reach the helipad in seconds flat. After climbing in and starting it, the Soldier emerges from another door, joining you and taking the pilot’s seat.

You don’t get ten feet off the ground before something tugs the helicopter down. The Captain, somehow relatively undamaged from his fall earlier. The Soldier presses the controls, fighting the enhanced strength of the annoyingly stubborn man.

But the blond manages to still the helicopter anyway. You and the brunet exchange a silent conversation, and you grab onto a handle just as he dives the helicopter towards the man. The whole thing crashes sideways, but the Captain still rises.

Fine. Just as he leans to peek inside, the Winter Soldier punches through the glass and locks his hand around his throat. However, due to the sudden movement, the helicopter tips backwards.

You try to grab the Soldier, but you’re thrown back and hit your head as the helicopter hits the water. Disoriented and with your wings suddenly soaked, you struggle to find your way out. The Soldier gets pulled away from you as you reach for him, and before you can react a hand reaches out to you.

As your vision goes dark, you take it.

———————————————————————

When you come to, you go into high alert. The last thing you remember, the doctor had begun reciting your trigger words, and now… Where were you?

Scanning the room, you come to the conclusion that it was a mechanic’s garage, long abandoned with some old equipment left behind. To your left, Bucky is still passed out. You aren’t surprised that you were awake first; your powers keep you from staying down for longer than an hour.

You have handcuffs on, while his metal arm is stuck between a large piece of machinery, tightly clamped. While the room you both are in is empty, you know you aren’t alone. There aren’t any cameras, yet you can tell that you’re being watched.

But when you try to stretch your wings, you’re met with a painful resistance. You’d felt the discomfort, but you assumed that it was just from the cramped cage. This is different, though. Your wings are tied.

Grunting from the pain and rope digging into the limbs, you try to relax as you take calming breaths. The rope chafes against the skin, scratching it even at the slightest of touches.

“Do you know who you are?”

You look up. Steve. And the Falcon. The latter asked the question, arms crossed over his chest as he lingers further back than the former.

“I’m (Y/N) (L/N),” you say. He and Steve exchange a glance, then he gestures for you to prove it. “I used to share an apartment with you two.” You nod to Bucky. “I had a tin of tea stashed behind your medicine, and our spare key was always under a random rock on the porch,” you chuckle. “Don’ know how no one ever broke in.”

Steve smiles. “Good to see you again, (Y/N).” You offer a weak smile, hissing in pain when you move wrong and the rope drags a bit too hard. He rushes forward immediately, kneeling next to you and untying the rope.

“Are you okay?” You nod as he drops the rope away. Your wings unfurl, healing the small scratches as you relax. As he removes the cuffs, the Falcon frowns.

“Look, not to seem rude, but we’re supposed to just trust you now? You just broke out of a government building with no reservations about dropping bodies,” he says. So that’s what happened. Standing, you ignore the creeping guilt and extend a hand to him.

“I’m not asking you to trust me,” you say. “I don’t really trust me. But I want to fix the damage I did. And if Steve trusts you to help do that, I trust you.” His gaze softens, and he reluctantly shakes your hand.

“Guess all you old people are good with speeches, huh?” You lightly laugh. He nods. “I’m Sam.”

“(Y/N).”

Steve glances at Bucky. “Could you wake him up? I think he’ll react better if it’s you.”

Holding up a hand and letting power dance on your fingertips, you nod. “I can do better than that.” You touch his forehead, focusing on mending the wound still dripping blood from his temple. He has bruises that you heal with a single thought, and the other two can’t help but gape.

“That’s something,” Sam says, watching the brunet slowly blink awake. He groans weakly as you help him sit up, gently running a hand over his back.

“Steve,” he mumbles.

The blond, as much as he wants to trust him as well, knows he has to take precautions. “Which Bucky am I talking to?”

Similar to you, he begins listing off memories the two of you pieced together in your small Bucharest apartment. “Your mom’s name was Sarah. You used to wear newspapers in your shoes.”

“Can’t read that in a museum,” Steve says. Sam shrugs, still finding it hard to believe how easily the Captain is trusting. He supposes your history together is affecting him.

Bucky sighs. “What did we do?”

“Enough.”

“We knew this would happen,” you mutter. “Everything HYDRA put inside us is still there. All that doctor had to do was say the fucking words.”

“Who was he?” Steve asks. When neither of you come up with a name, he applies some pressure. “People are dead. The bombing, the setup, the doctor did all that just to get ten minutes with you. I need you to do better than ‘I don’t know’.”

Bucky thinks for a moment. “He wanted to know about Siberia. Where we were… kept.”

He explains the other super soldiers, how skilled and organized they were. Even if you and him were HYDRA’s scythe and fist, they were their bullets. You performed assassinations. Sent messages. They took down HYDRA’s enemies for pure power.

After he finishes, you begin to free his metal arm while Sam and Steve discuss. You notice him zoning out before tapping his arm.

“Hey. We’ll fix this,” you promise.

“I don’t know if we can,” Bucky whispers.

It’s hard to argue with that. What you’ve done, the blood on your hands, it’s not the kind you atone for. “Then we make amends. All that matters is we’re together now, right?”

He nods. “Right. Now, instead of running from the government, we get to see if Steve will forgive us for 70 years of war crimes,” he snarks.

You roll your eyes. 70 years of torture and experimentation, and he was already back to sassing your best friend.

“It’s Steve. He was committing crimes long before we were.”

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downforthegas · 2 months

Text

Little drabble I've thought of writing for a while... Wa//lly is hanging out with Ba//rn//aby, and farts in front of him for the first time... teasing ensues

CW: farts (obviously), teasing/humiliation

Barn and Wally are hanging out at Barn's house. Barn has a nice, big bed (bc of course he does) so him and Wally are able to comfortably rest on it together. Barn's sitting upright against the headboard, while Wally is lying on his stomach, just listening to his best friend. He's cuddling up against a bone-shaped pillow, a favorite of Barn's many pillows that cover the bed. He's resting his head against the top and the bottom is getting squeezed gently between his thighs.

"So I says," Barnaby started. "and then he disappeared without a tres! eheheheheheh!"

"Ha. ha. ha. That's funny, Barnaby."

"Aw, thanks pal. You're always lookin out for me."

"Well... it's what friends do... I think."

Barnaby laughs again. He continued talking and Wally continued to listen. He wasn't much for talking, so he was a great listener. This time, however, he could hardly focus. No, he wasn't disassociating like usual. At least, he wasn't trying to, but something was making him. His tummy was starting to ache. He could feel little bubbles shifting around inside of him. Clearly the chili dogs him and Barnaby had earlier were not sitting well. Barn seemed completely fine, being used to foods like that, but Wally didn't eat chili regularly so his tummy wasn't working well with it.

Wally knew what it was. He knew he was full of gas, and that he had to get it out now. But he didn't want to. He didn't want to be rude, but with the way he was positioned, with his stomach against the pillow and his legs spread slightly, it was kinda hard. It was no use fighting it. He relaxed a little and pushed out a silent, airy fart. It had to have gone on for 30 seconds straight. He felt his belly deflate and shrink as the warm air rushed out of him, into the open air and against Barn's pillow. The seat of his pants slowly warmed up as well, which admittedly felt really good, almost as good as the cramps disappearing from his midsection. He let out a slight sigh when it was over.

Then the smell hit Barn.

Wally didn't think the fart would have a smell, but then he smelled it himself. He was hoping Barn wouldn't say anything about it but-

"Whoooo!" Barnaby fanned his nose with his huge mitt. He was in the middle of talking about what Howdy was rambling about when a smell of rotten apples mixed with chili hit his nose and stopped him. "Jeez, what's that smell?"

"Oh." Wally's face was faintly orange. Hopefully he wouldn't know that was him. "Uh... I'm... not... sure..."

Barn could tell Wally was being a little suspicious. He knew a little teasing wouldn't be so bad.

"Heh. Maybe a skunk just walked past the house."

Wally's face got more orange. "Uh... maybe..."

"Actually, the egg salad in my fridge prolly went off now that I think about it." He was grinning ear to ear.

The flush on Wally's face grew to his ears. "That has to be it..."

"Oh, I know. I think something died under the house."

Wally's stomach turned as he shoved his face into the pillow. "It doesn't smell that bad!" He said into the pillow, hoping Barn wouldn't hear.

"Oh I don't know, pal," Barn continued. "I think I saw a few flowers die outside... and the paint's pealing over there... oh, I know! Maybe it's coming from you!"

Wally lifted his head, his eyes pointing downward as if he were angry and his face still orange. "Not... at... all..." Just as he said this, he accidentally push a little audible fart into the pillow. it was still muffled but both Wally and Barn could hear. Wally shoved his face back into the pillow as Barn chuckled.

"Fine... it... was... me..."

"Heh. Sorry, buddy. I kinda knew it was you."

"You did?"

"Yeah. I thought I'd tease you a little, but I didn't think you'd take it so hard. Sorry bout that."

"Oh, it's ok," Wally said as he sat up, still sitting on the pillow. "I didn't mean to... do that... my stomach was hurting so bad... I felt like I was gonna explode... I tried to hold it but-"

"Aw, don't worry about it. I actually thought it was kinda cute."

"Cute?"

"Yeah. hehe. I didn't think you could make a smell like that..." He looked over and finally realized what Wally was sitting on. He didn't seem too pleased. "...and against my favorite pillow too."

Just then Barnaby's stomach growled. He held his mitt against it in discomfort.

"Ughh!" Barn said. "I think I had too much chili." He gently lifted himself slightly off the bed and blasted a loud, long bubbling fart against the blanket. It vibrated the bed violently for a solid 10 seconds. Barn sighed and waved his mitt.

"Phew!" He exclaimed. "That's better!"

"Wow Barn..." He waved the stink away from his face. It was a little unbearable. He had never heard Barn fart before and now he never wanted to again. "That was..."

"Huge? I know." Barn said. "But we're best friends. If you wanna fart around me, go ahead. It's natural."

"You're right..." Wally said, releasing another silent toot against the pillow, this time however, the hissing of the fart was loud enough to hear, which made Wally blush a little.

"Hey! That's my pillow!" Barn exclaimed.

"Ha. Ha. Ha... ok then... have it back..." He took the pillow out from underneath him and flung the back of it into Barn's face.

"Eww, Buddy!" He laughed. Then he took the blanket that was underneath his butt and threw it on top of Wally, who retched right before pulling the blanket off, his hair coming undone.

"That was gross..." Wally said, smiling even though he got a face full of butt fumes.

"Heheheheh! Serves you right!" The two laughed. Deep down, despite how embarrassed Wally was, he was really happy. Because now he knew he could be fully comfortable around his best friend.

Phew, uh... I've been wanting to write this for a while. I know I've been posting a lot of WH eprocto stuff, but this is what happens when two interests combine. I can't just keep it to myself... that would be selfish lol

#eproctophilia #playfellowxxx #gassyfellowxxx #eprocto #fart kink #gassy #farts #farting #guy fart #gassy guy

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lowcalheavyweight · 11 months

Text

Tw: vent, personal meanspo? (Seriously these thoughts don't apply to anyone else, I don't think any other people have measurable worth, i love you)

They won't care

They will never care and they have never cared, even when they thought you were sick.

You tried kindness and sincerity

They didn't like you

You tried being smart and helpful

They didn't want to talk to you

You tried making yourself interesting with hobbies and style

They didn't want to be your friends

You tried dressing pretty&sexy

They didn't care about you

Now you are trying being petite and fragile

They won't attempt to reach out to you

"You are too intimidating," "You're self-sufficient," "Independent,"

Wha-I'M LONELY.

TO THE POINT I'M STRUGGLING TO FUNCTION

I will beg for scraps of your friendship that you deny me for these excuses

My attemps to bond and reach out have left me with anxiety so crippling I can't talk to people without being convinced they hate me

I'm obsessing about my worth as a human being, desperately holding onto my "worthy" parts and crisis panicing when I accidentally got a burnscar cause that means my stock value just went down, right?

I use my body as a barganing chip and I'm too scared to do what i want with it cause my "possible worth" will be higher if I'm still able to become anything they want me to be, for the person who finally picks me up

My brain tells me I will be worthier if I lose more weight

My brain tells me they will just contine to look past you

I'm already on 24/7 sale, they will never pick you up

Never choose you

I've been reflecting on the past recently (can you tell?!??haha) and remembered middle school.

I was already eating quite disordered(without realising - in a soft binge cycle and missing hunger and fullness ques) and we had a schoolwork to "mark on this website your eating habits-food etc for a period of time and submit to the teacher"

If I remember correctly i think it didn't let me log a empty breakfast so I asked, in front of the while class "what if you eat irregularly?" and was then openly pressed until I revealed I mostly only ate once a day and sometimes missed days (once again, I didn't even really try to hide it, I ate a lot when I did and didn't think about food much, I just wanted to do my schoolwork properly)

My teacher then told me to eat something for meals to log them and I just got frustrated cause before, they had extra told us not to change our habits for this assigment

I forgot about it soon and only long after realised my whole class thought I had a full blown ed at that time

And all they did was - ONE person told me once, randomly to eat breakfast every morning, at least a sandwich (at least?? dude that's a whole MEAL) and report to them every day what I ate.

Honestly, at that point I was just confused but happy someone seemed interested in having a daily conversation.

They never once talked to me again.

And honestly, I was actually super sick at that time, not with an ed but severe depression and disassociation due to family trauma. Staying up 72h straight REGULARLY, fevers and sick all the time, severe memory loss

I was visibly sick,

with what they thought was an ed

And noone cared

They will never care, you will never reach anyone or anything else exept your ugw

Your worth will still drop cause your health, skin, mental capacity and wellbeing will drop it lower than your weightloss could ever regain

You will die alone, anxious and fuking pathetic cause it is all your fault anyways and noone feels bad for you "being so lonely boohoo"

You are the real evil anyways, otherwise you'd be worthy of love at this point.

Die like you deserve

Xoxo ♡

#tw 3d vent #ed vent #tw ed rant #tw disordered eating #tw eating issues #tw restrictive ed #tw ana shit #i want to be tiny #i wanna be weightless #i want to be weightless #disordered eating in tags #disordered eating thoughts #ed disorder #mean$p0

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decolonize-the-left · 1 year

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(sorry this got so long and no hard feelings if you don’t even read it.)

i think some people urgently need a refresher on what privilege is, because it isn’t, “you didn’t experience pain/trauma/harm” or,“you experienced pain/trauma/harm but it doesn’t matter (and/or you are a bad person as well)” or EVEN, “your pain/trauma/harm has been assigned a point value and unfortunately you didn’t earn enough to win gold in the oppression olympics, a thing that is both possible to achieve and normal to want”.

like. i recently went through a nightmare housing situation. i was so stressed by it that i had a major health relapse. i stopped sleeping, i could barely eat, my hair was falling out, i couldn’t think. suicidal ideation became my only consistent activity. and you know what? i still had privilege! immense privilege in fact. because there was a neighbor of mine who lived outside in his car. over the winter - one of the coldest on record - i would listen to him struggling to get the crappy engine going so he could stay warm during my sleepless nights. i was in a home that was in a terrifying state of disrepair and crawling with roaches and black widows, but the heater (kinda) worked and i had blankets and a fridge full of food… and even eventually had the means to get the hell out of there.

my neighbor didn’t.

i grew up knowing out queer kids who got beat, and worse. sometimes by other kids, sometimes by adults, usually their own families. my own father bragged about what he would do if any of his kids were like that. i didn’t fully come out until i was in my 30s, and yes being closeted absolutely messed me up. i still struggle with the desire to “tone it down” and have to remember that i’m not a kid anymore, that i made it to adulthood. some of those kids didn’t. the targeted abuse that out queer people routinely receive started when i had the stability of being an adult who had support structures and a fair bit of autonomy.

being in the closet didn’t spare me from quite a bit of trauma and abuse. it lead to a lot of ongoing pain and disassociation, and i’m not minimizing that. i hope i’m being clear that being in the closet obviously is not analogous to straight or cis privilege, neither of which are things queer people have, ever. but it’s bananas to me that people think there’s no privilege in the relative safety of the closet. in many cases the option of the closet made the difference for those who are in a position to be working on their trauma as adults. many without the painful, damaging, hideous option of the closet aren’t even here today.

(and it also needs to be said for fellow white queer people still not getting it: bigotries exist in this world for which there is. no. closet!)

we can acknowledge that we had the grim benefit of an extremely costly survival strategy which others did not have access to. and we can build solidarity around the fact that mere bruised survival is nowhere fucking near good enough for anyone.

Amen

#asked #answered #decolstw

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nouveauxamoris · 6 months

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i think u should post more design hcs... if i may suggest the big three in the bitch brigade :3

IM SO ON IT! just like the last design hc post, i’ll add little rundowns of some of the design traits!

DAZAI

my dazai design has gone thru a LOT of phases, as well as just a bit of exploration… a few common and solidified traits about him however:

- dazai’s very tan, and his hair is VERY curly, bordering coily. in my hc he’s ethnically mixed :3 (japanese and bangladeshi!)

- soft but sharp face, big nose, and soft big eyes. thick eyebrows too! i based his colour scheme off the manga one, so, dark brown almost black hair instead of a lighter brown, and dark brown eyes instead of a chestnut brown.

- SNAKEBITE PIERCINGS! in me nd the lovely @fiftyofhearts ‘ hcs (hes the asker here hai ethan :3), he got them done w ranpo and yosano.

- he’s fat. okay. i said so. the silhouette of his big ass clothes (the trenchcoat specifically) makes him look a little smaller, but thats still very much true.

- he’s scruffy. goes through periods of shaving vs not shaving but generally has a little bit of wispy facial hair more often than not. also, he’s transmasc!!! he binds w bandages also its not good. don’t do what he does. i don’t encourage unsafe binding

- 14 to 16-zai was very hyperfem. i don’t think he had that realization that he was trans until a liiiil bit later. maybe around 17? very subtly transitioned. i dont think he outwardly came out to many people other than probably chuuya, oda, and ango. everyone else just caught on eventually. he definitely went solely by his last name to disassociate from his deadname and eventually chose the name “osamu” as his first later on

- prisonzai is FULL of facial hair! his hair has gotten a lil longer too. that’s due to the fact that i’d imagine honestly his hair grows Very fast. and they’re not gonna give him a razor to shave this is literally prison

- he’s a lesbian btw

SIGMA

somehow, the sigma design has stayed relatively linear.

- LATINA SIGMA REALNESS!!!!!!!!!! a little ethnically ambiguous canonically because she was made from a book. duh. but tbh i think shes argentinian

- tan skin, very cool undertone. soft and droopy eyes, SUPER thick eyebrows, and white eyelashes. very round face and big and wide arched nose. she has a bit of a pathetic and sopping wet look to her, but she still looks very kind and gentle. most of the time while she’s masking (usually while working), that kinda works in her favour. adds to the warm and inviting feeling she’s got goin on. however, her resting face is very sad and miserable.

- she’s tall and lanky, kinda skinny. very lean and relatively average build. her colour scheme and outfit design is adjacent to the way she’s drawn in the manga. i love her so much but i dont like the anime depiction of her outfit… sorry bbg. she’s perfect in every way however

- i think generally, she’s very androgynous. enjoys dressing very androgynously too. you know how in stormbringer lippmann is described as like, so androgynous to the point where if he dressed femininely men would go crazy ‘nd if he dressed masculinely women would go crazy?? yeah. she’s got something similar goin on. switches between dressing femininely and masculinely and very in-between often. always doing something cute.

- in my eyes she is so transfem. no sort of medical transition, tho… just socially. came out that page serving cunt and she’ll continue to the day she dies

- she wears press on nails me-thinks. usually black almonds or stilettos, sometimes she switches it up to purple however.

- hair cut is kinda weird but like ???? its like if u mixed a hime cut w a wolf cut basically. or smthn like that. lots of layers. yes that’s her natural hair colour btw, she’s just cute like that.

- she’s also a lesbian btw

JŌNO

i’m only rlly getting into drawing jōno recently.. so lots of things keep changing. however, i HAVE decided on something.

- jōno is very much so blasian. lightskinted…. hair is pretty wavy but rests pretty straight just cuz of the haircut. the red is dyed btw. she didn’t care much abt the colour, someone asked to fuck w her hair, and she begrudgingly told them to go crazy. everyone seems to like it however, so she’s down w it.

- SMILE LINES. SMILE LINES AND EYE WRINKLES. product of keeping her eyes closed literally all the time. and her stupid smug resting face. she’s also filled with freckles and beauty marks. majority of them are on her face, but she’s definitely got some around her body as well.

- jōno is Tall. around 5’11” ethan has decided. she’s got a very graceful build but she’s NOT small, nor thin. lots of muscle and fat collecting around her thighs and legs, her strongest asset when it comes to physical strength methinks. have you SEEN how violently she’s able to kick people??? cmon now.

- very elegant woman in every aspect Except personality. i love her she’s actually SUCH a bitch

- again. TRANSFEM! if i like a male character.. heh… well… let’s just say they’re no longer male. (unless you’re dazai. he’s boybossing it up every day)

- she’s ALSO a lesbian btw

- i don’t have a lot to say for her i just love her so much omg

#bungo stray dogs #bsd #bsd fanart #bungo stray dogs fanart #dazai osamu #dazai bsd #self ship #bsd sigma #bsd jouno #saigiku jōno #jouno saigiku #osamu dazai #i LOVE THEM!#ethamorisbsdverse #bsd hcs

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sophieinwonderland · 11 months

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Can you talk about the study on tulpas that Stanford is doing? We remember you mentioning it

Sure!

Here is the post in r/tulpas from 2019

The event was 3 days long: 2 for travel, and 1 day for scans and interview.

I flew in in the evening, and caught a university paid Uber to the hotel. It was in the afternoon at this point. The flight from SLC to SFO isn’t a particularly long one, so I wasn’t horribly tired and didn’t feel like crashing for much. I relaxed a bit, and decided to meet up with another mancer in the area, and get a bite to eat. After a lovely talk with them, I headed back to the hotel to try and get some decent rest for the far more busy day tomorrow.

I had previously told the crew that I was more of an evening person, so we had the interview over lunch, and did the MRI scans later in the afternoon. Lunch was at Tanya Luhrmann’s home with Michael Lifshitz, on the Stanford campus. The interview was actually rather enjoyable, and gave us much time to talk about tulpas, the community, and Aly in particular. The interview was recorded by all 3 of us at the table, but the other two also will be transcribing it for better use later. It’s entirely possible to ask for a copy from them, and I might get a transcribed version later, but I have my own copy of the audio at least.

The interview was fairly free form. There were some formulaic questions, much like I received in the pre-study questionnaire. But there were also much more open ended questions, that didn’t have a set destination. More than once Tanya would get excited by a response, and ask more followup question that would end up following one tangent after another. The questions were fairly varied; from the more expected ones like how I found out about tulpas or why I made Aly, to more unexpected ones like trying to describe how specifically Aly helps me. The time flowed pretty quickly during the interview, as I attempted to explain my relationship with Aly and the experience of having her. I think I did okay, but there weren’t really any sort of wrong answers.

The MRI scan was fascinating. Due to scheduling restrictions, my session was broken into two portions. Each portion we focused on a separate task. I’m told that one of the two tasks was new, and I was the proverbial guinea pig, but I’m also told that it was a ton easier than the previous one. I wasn’t going to complain. I don’t want to go into too many details, to not poison the well so to speak, so that people can practice for the specifics of the experiments. The first one focused on mindvoice and possession/disassociation. It was probably the longer of the two, since it was a little more involved than the second. We found the test to be harder than expected, even though we knew a bunch of the specifics since we helped design the test. Trying to stay focused while the machine is loudly buzzing and clicking at you while you’re stuffed in a tiny tube, wasn’t exactly easy.

During this, I also had expressed interest in getting a nice scan to print off later. So after the experiment was done, they happily obliged and got a full resolution scan of my brain and emailed it to me. I plan on 3d printing it later, maybe at scale but I haven’t decided yet.

We then had to leave the lab for a while, since another group had scheduled it, so I was given like an hour tour of campus nearby and we grabbed some smoothies. At this point, I was pretty open to just chat with Michael, the neuroimaging researcher about the study and other plans, including doing an AMA after the data has finished being gathered and starting to be analyzed or published.

The second experiment was purely mindvoice related, and far less stressful because it was more open ended and less constrained in general. We rocked through this one really fast, taking a lot less time than expected. Which people were happy about since apparently this particular one had just been retooled. It was still loud and took getting used to, but it worked out pretty well. At the end of it, who would have thought being in a tube for 3 hours would be tiring. I went back to the hotel, ordered some food and just crashed on the bed.

The last day, it was mostly just check out from the hotel and get ready to fly. Tanya had a couple more questions to ask, and I had nothing better to do between checking out of the hotel and my flight. I spoke with her a little bit more, then spent a little over an hour wandering the Stanford campus before I caught another Uber to the airport.

The experience was actually really pleasant. I was incredibly anxious and worried about it, probably for the same reason a lot of other people are. Worries about what will happen, what the process would be, Imposter Syndrome worries, and whatnot. But in the end, it actually was a really positive experience, and fell like it was good for both Aly and myself, since there were a bunch of things that got us a little bit closer together.

That all said, the study still has a bunch of funds left, and we’re looking for more people who’d be willing to spend 3 days in Stanford to go through it all as well. Here is the link for the new interest form, to help us screen who would be the best fit for the study.

Thanks all for reading!

In 2021, it was mentioned that the study was on pause due to COVID.

Due to COVID-19, the study came to an unceremonious halt as lockdowns started. Only recently have the facilities in Stanford opened up enough to consider continuing, but there's still a bunch of general roadblocks due to the pandemic.

Last year, a user reported participating in the study and did an AMA, meaning it had restarted by that point.

One user asked what the goal of the study was, and they responded with this:

Trying to see if there's something that shows up on brain scans. Nothing more or less. Afterwards they can compare to see if it's similar to things like DID.

I haven't heard anything on this particular study since, but the ones running it published this in February:

It's unclear to me if the above study is connected to the MRI study. Since it was mentioned that the MRI study had an interview portion, perhaps they used some of the answers from the interviews with tulpamancers for the MRI study for the above?

Either way, it shouldn't be too much longer before the results are released.

And I'm so eager to see both the conclusions, and what the next phases of research are going to be. 😊

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nteabodies · 1 year

Text

The Saga Begins, and how it seamlessly fits into the Pop star wars AU

youtube

I feel like the Saga Begins is the perfect song to represent @nevertheless-moving's Pop Star Wars AU, bc… it's sung by obi wan! From his pov! During the exact time period he travelled to! Makes references to the future obi wan shouldn't know yet! Is somewhat upbeat with an undercurrent of sadness which is the epitome of Obi-Wan – but more than that, I can envision this weird Al youtube video organically existing within the Pop Star Wars universe!

Peek under the break for my crazed ramblings ig

So, the temple knows the Obi Wan had a huge, life changing vision that changed his behaviour and personality somewhat, but they don't realise he also has an Anakin shaped glob of unresolved trauma with a helpful side of survivors guilt and depression that he is very good at hiding from everyone.

And he is somewhat successful at Naboo. Like, he was 100% expecting Maul (and it was a little pathetic how easily he defeated him this time) so he was able to dissassocate from the situation and miraculously not have a flashback of Qui Gon's death mid-lightsaber swing.

So other than being eerily skilled at Soresu, no one notices him or his trauma, just how he likes it.

But on the trip back to Coruscant, someone manages to stab Qui Gon (who was mildly concussed from the fight with Maul so he's just like "oh my it appears i have been stabbed").

And Obi-Wan had only just begun to start relaxing a little bit now that Qui Gon was safe, so he was taking a nap when the stabbing happened. (he hadn't slept for the entire week long mission, or he would not be taking this nap)

So Obi-Wan wakes up relaxed, does a few stretches and contentedly strolls out of his room then freezes.

He can't sense Qui Gon (because Qui Gon is unconscous). He strains to find him and when he does, he can only sense a weak force presence, and when he sprints to the presence he finds the floor covered in blood (mainly the attackers blood bc a concussed qui gon accidentally stabbed the attacker back while peacefully arresting her) Qui Gon lying down on the floor with a stab wound on his stomach and medic tending to him.

Obi-Wan loses it. He screams a guttural "NOOOO!" that's 10 times more grief stricken than the one in his original life. Qui gon couldn't die! Not again! NOT AGAIN! He was sent back to fix this, wasn't he? Why did everything he tried to fix break? Was everything going to be the same this time? Even with him trying his hardest to stop it?

At this point he's cradling Qui Gon's head against his chest like he's already dead and having a full blown panic attack in front of the shocked pikachu face medic and shock pikachu face qui gon who got shocked awake by the scream (the stabbed attacker gets woken up by the third gutteral scream and resolves to rethink her life if she survived this oredeal)

When Obi Wan comes to he sees his dead master and does the whole you're not dead Master!!! Routine

Long story short, an extremely concerned Qui-Gon sends Obi-Wan to the mind healers at the Jedi temple.

So the mindhealers engage in the usual forms of therapy, but Obi-Wan has had time to collect himself and gain his composure (using the tried and true gaslight gatekeep girboss away your trauma method pioneered by Ben Kenobi)

So realising they're not doing anything other than making Obi wan more closed off and in denial, the mind healers decide to try art therapy which kind of works! he paints his feelings and his visions (and in this AU he's not the best painter so he draws things like 2 stick figures fighting with lightsabers with a lot of fire surrounding them and when the mind healer asks him to describe it his eyes fill with tears/he disassociates and gives classic Old Ben cryptic platitudes.)

Obi-Wan doesn't realise he's acting like Qui-Gon when he retreats into his Old Ben persona, but the healers do. And they think he's emulating his master to escape his visions. What they do know of his 'vision' is:

1) Qui Gon Jinn dies somehow

2) something bad happens to little anakin skywalker

Anyway so that's the reason Anakin and Qui-Gon are roped into his therapy sessions. When they're in the room they can reassure him that nothing has happened to them, that recalling a vision of a future that hasn't happened isn't going affect them in the present.

By this point Obi-Wan is not in denial about his trauma anymore (well not as much as before) and he's willing to try new things. But he draws the line at sharing all the details of his 'vision' with anyone. So he goes "can't we go back to the painting? I liked doing the artistic stuff, it helped me process a little bit without hurting too much" even though it was more of him painting and crying and going in circles with the mind healers

And Qui Gon has this epiphany. He has spent 10 years listening to Obi-Wan singing pretentious indie rock in the shower, humming old jedi lullabies while he watered the plants, crooning a soothing tune to their latest pathetic lifeforms, caterwauling emo metal while blackout drunk and giving Qui Gon a migraine–

The point is that Obi-Wan obviously enjoys singing.

"If you can't say it, why don't you sing it?"

And so Obi Wan finds himself writing a song for the first time. Maybe space Don McLean has already released Space American Pie by this point, so he makes a parody of the lyrics. Should he write about everything? Nah, that's too dangerous. Maybe he should write about the events of the past few weeks, but from the old timeline. Just to process everything that happened so far.

Smol baby Anakin is with him while he's drafting the song and he can't help but compare this rosy cheeked Anakin to Vader. And that's when he finally gets the chorus perfected

Oh my, my this here Anakin guy

Maybe Vader someday later, now he's just a small fry

He left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye

Sayin', "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi

And smol anakin pretends to be angy that Obi wan called him a small fry but secretly is delighted that the entire chorus is about him.

Obi-wan performs the song for Qui Gon and Anakin one night. Anakin is in bed and begs Obi Wan to sing "that cool song you were writing about just now!"

Cue some Master Padawan angst after Anakin falls asleep and Qui Gon realises he was supposed to die during the mission to Naboo.

Fast Forward a few weeks and it's Anakin's favourite lullaby because its about him! And it has his name! And obi wan looks so fond when he sings the chorus to him! (Qui Gon secretly records it and uploads it to his space youtube channel that no one watches)

And it's on one of these nights when Obi Wan has an epiphany. Bc... didn't space Don McLean make like a billion credits from this song alone? And what about that other annoyingly catchy song that hasn't been released yet?? Etc, leading to the Pop Star Wars AU premise

Ok now, fast forward to the war and General Kenobi has a lot of… dedicated fans. And a very small niche of these fans found the old spaceyoutube video and are like, omg the general is smol, the general can sing! Which leads to the conspiracy theory that general kenobi and the elusive BK are the same person. But it's a fringe theory, unknown even within the fandom and you'd have to dig pretty deep into the cross section of the Kenobi and BK fandom iceberg to find this theory.

Among the hardcore fans who know of it, it's considered a hilarious crack theory that makes a little too much sense (like the Sith Lord Jar Jar Binks theory)

Fast forward again! Another 30 ish years! Big identity reveal! Omg Kenobi and BK are the SAME PERSON! The video blows up. It becomes a meme.

And now, Space Weird Al who specialises in parodies makes an official music video of the song!

He's done extensive research into how everyone from the time period would look like and even managed to source authentic vintage jedi robes for it.

And that's how Obi Wan Kenobi gets shown this video by a gleeful Anakin while Qui Gon sips tea in the background like it's not his fault all of this happened.

And they all lived happily ever after, except obi wan who jumped out the window in mortification.

#star wars #pop star wars au #obi wan kenobi #qui gon jinn #anakin skywalker #fanart #I have so much work to do #But I chose pop star wars au #Bc I'm worth it #Youtube #“Who is vader” - everyone in this AU

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