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Chaos Club Headcannons (Lucius Ver.):

Lucius Malfoy:

᪥ Wears clear lipgloss

᪥ Naturally sensitive to the cold

᪥ Can not sing for the life of himself

᪥ Started to like Narcissa around their third year (they started to date in the end of their fourth year)

᪥ Has to go through an extensive night routine for his skin

᪥ Sleeps with an essential oil air humidifier (he likes lavender the most)

᪥ Will flip if anyone touches his hair

᪥ Needs a full 10 hours of sleep or else he wakes up with eye bags and looks like a zombie risen from the dead

᪥ Everyone thinks his favorite class is potions, when it is actually Ancient Runes

᪥ Carries around a satchel (for his books) that has his family crest embroidered smack dab in the middle of it (gets one custom made for Narcissa and eventually Draco)

#lucius malfoy #marauders era #young severus #chaos club #narcissa black #ancient runes #Hogwarts #hp headcanon

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Daisy Ridley talking about working with Adam Driver in Star Wars: The Force Awakens; commentary from the featurette, “The Scavenger & the Stormtrooper.”

#adam driver #daisy ridley #star wars #tall man

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His patience snapped 😅 Original video

#hogwarts legacy #ominis gaunt #sebastian sallow #hogwarts legacy mc #imelda reyes #poppy sweeting #leander prewett #everett clopton #garreth weasley #amit thakkar

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Chaos Club

Barty, teaching Bellatrix to drive: Okay, you're driving and Narcissa and Regulus walk into the road. Quick, what do you hit?

Bellatrix: Oh, definitely Regulus. I could never hurt Cissy.

Barty, massaging his temples: The brakes. You hit the bloody brakes.

#chaos club #marauders era #barty crouch jr #bellatrix black #incorrect quotes

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Chaos Club

Barty: Where is my bloody fucking wand?

Lucius: Crouch, *Lucius waves his hands in the direction of Narcissa whom is on the couch of the common room* Cissa is around, can you say it a little nicer?

Barty: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my BLOODY FUCKING WAND?!

Y/N: lol *totally didn’t hide the wand*

#y/n incorrect quotes #hp yn insert #marauders era #chaos club #lucius malfoy #barty crouch jr #chaos #narcissa black #narcissa malfoy

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Chaos Club

*Barty is casually searching around the room*

Lucius: Hey Barty, what’re you looking for?

Barty: My will to live.

*Regulus walks into the room*

Barty: Oh, there it is.

#chaos club #marauders era #lucius malfoy #incorrect quotes #barty crouch jr #regulus black

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another good time to post this

#the hobbit #bagginshield

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Chaos Club

*Y/N is holding a camera, hiding behind a tree with Regulus to make sure Lucius isn’t naughty on his first date with Narcissa.*

Lucius: My hands are cold. 
Narcissa: Here, let me hold them. 
Lucius: My lips are cold too. 
Narcissa: *covers Lucius's mouth with her hand

#lucissa #chaos club #marauders era #lucius malfoy #narcissa black #regulus black

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NEED IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK 💥💥💥

The sole idea of the tv show fills me with horror

I'm afraid they'll make Snape a bidimensional character

I'm afraid he'll get no justice

I'm afraid we will be seen as freaks once again

I'm afraid they'll deminish his being bullied just like we saw our being bullied being deminished

I'm afraid they'll make him a laughing stock

I'm afraid they'll ruin Alan Rickman's legacy

He worked so hard on Snape WHILE BATTLING CANCER and always defended him

Loved him from day one

I'm afraid I'm so scared

#pro severus #pro snape #pro severus snape #severus snape #snape #professor severus snape #professor snape #severus snape fandom #snape defense #alan rickman #i love alan rickman

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Chaos Club

Regulus: Just be yourself.

Lucius: Really? Regulus, I have one day to win over Narcissa’s parents.

Lucius: How long did it take for you guys to like me?

Y/N: Couple of weeks, I found your hair pretty.

Bellatrix: Six months. And only because watching you scream is funny.

Severus: Jury’s still out.

Lucius: See Regulus? ‘Just be yourself,’ what kind of garbage advice is that?!

#severus snape #young severus #marauders era #lucius malfoy #lucissa #lucius and severus #bellatrix black #hp yn insert #regulus black #narcissa black

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Don’t forget Snape is totally the person to not look up at a student when they walk up to his desk and clear their throat for his attention, he wants to be addressed properly.

The teacher who everyone believes has eyes on the back of their head, no joke, this man knows if two kids are holding hands under the desk.

What are some stereotypical teacher things that you think Snape would do as a professor?

#professor snape #severus snape #pro severus #severus snape imagine

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Chaos Club

Barty: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.

Regulus: *holding a kitchen knife* This knife is actually a magic wand.

Severus: Meet me in the back of the Hogs Head for a wizard duel.

Bellatrix: *cocks gun* Muggle magic missile.

Lucius: What in Merlin’s beard is wrong with you people.

Y/N: *Eating a pumpkin pastie* Shut up you stupid glorified peacock.

#regulus black #barty crouch jr #severus snape #marauders era #harry potter #hp x reader #lucius malfoy #bellatrix black

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Chaos Club

Y/N: Oh god, she texted you ‘hi.’ Punctuation only means one thing, Lucius. She’s mad at you.

Lucius: No, it's Narcissa. She’s just being gramatically correct!

*meanwhile*

Narcissa: And then I used a period so he would know that I'm mad at him.

Severus: Cissa, a period doesn't say 'I'm mad', it says 'you're dead to me'.

Narcissa: I stand by my choice.

(Genz marauders era)

#narcissa black #lucius malfoy #chaos club #harry potter #marauders era #severus snape #young severus #hp x reader #gen z #lucissa

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Chaos Club

Severus: Hello Bellatrix, made anyone cry today?

Bellatrix: Sadly, no. But it’s only 10:00.

Y/N: Lucius is in the common room.

#severus snape #harry potter #marauders era #incorrect quotes #pro severus #slytherin #lucius malfoy #young severus #hp x reader #bellatrix black #chaos club

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Chaos Club

*Lucius and Y/N are texting*

Lucius: Bring back PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste. NONE.

Y/N: I got spring water 😊

Lucius: NO!

Y/N: With EXTRA minerals!

Y/N: It’s like licking a stalagmite!

Lucius: DON’T COME BACK TO THE DORMS!

Y/N: Mmmmmm, cave water 😋

(Yes, I know phones didn’t exist to this level, but… *offers you GEN-Z marauders era?*)

#incorrect quotes #harry potter #lucius malfoy #lucissa #hp x reader #reader insert #marauders era #gen z #non canon #chaos club

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I have decided to bend cannon and make my own group of misfits for my enjoyment:

Regulus, Barty, Lucius, Narcissa, Bellatrix, Severus, and of course Y/N (for the readers enjoyment.)

I’d like to call them the chaos club

Their ages are relatively similar in this reality and they all live a happy life because I cry when they die ☹️

Please don’t come at me in the comments if you don’t like this. I will frown

Links to the little blurbs:

Be Yourself

Scared Lucius

‘hi.’

Crying

Purified Water

My will to live

“BLOODY FUCKING WAND!”

#chaos club #severus snape #marauders era #lucius malfoy #narcissa black #bellatrix black #regulus black #pro severus #slytherin #young severus #non canon #barty crouch jr

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Happy Birthday Severus Tobias Snape!