nesswrites

[nesswrites]

The Overhaul/Eri arc does what the third X-Men movie tried to do, but so much better.

#bnha #xmen

[nesswrites]

Kinktober Day 1: Leather/Latex

Mostly SFW but I'm still putting it under the cut to be safe.

Leather of my character Ichabod - https://toyhou.se/20004078.ichabod

Yes I referenced Bugs Bunny shhh.

[nesswrites]

My body felt strange at that moment. I could see everything from outside. My boyfriend stumbled as I pushed him out of the way. The out of control truck barreling towards us. The truck driver’s body convulsed, and the knowledge that she was having a seizure behind the wheel. 

And then, detached. A skeletal hand grasped my own and pulled me out of my body, walked past my boyfriend, and went to the truck driver. Pulled her out too. 

And then Death looked at us, and wordlessly pulled a leather bound book from their pocket. They were flipping through the pages, looking at each of us and clacking a skeletal finger against a bony jaw. Behind us, in slow motion, like the world was in 1/100th speed, my boyfriend was slowly getting to his feet. He hadn’t seen my body yet.

The truck driver was the first to break the silence, harsh sobs breaking through my looking at the world. “I’m so sorry! I don’t know what happened, but...” she looked at Death. “We’re dead, aren’t we?”

Part of me wanted to blame her, but how could I? It wasn’t her fault she’d been having a seizure. “It seems like it, miss, but, if you don’t mind my asking, do you know what happened? It seemed you were having a seizure.”

In front of us, Death was still silent and flicking through the notebook. It was hard to say without eyebrows or lips, but I could have sworn they looked concerned.

Behind us, my boyfriend was up, but the slowness of the scene meant he was only starting to turn towards our bodies. 

The truck driver looked stunned. “I’ve never had a seizure before! I can’t imagine why -”

Death’s bony voice finally broke, glancing at us over the book. “It was rat poison, Sharon. Your boyfriend poisoned your coffee, he’s been cheating on you. But that’s okay, I think you’ll enjoy working with Charon, delivering souls to the afterlife is like truck driving, but far safer and with better benefits.” 

With a click, they closed the book. “And YOU David.” Their skeletal finger poked my chest. “You weren’t supposed to die, Patrick was. Luckily for you you both were meant to go to the same department in death, because there’s a need. You get to go to the Cupid department.” 

With that, Death held myself and Sharon by our hands, and as Patrick’s scream broke out behind me, distorted and slow as molasses, we left.

---

“Welcome to Cupid Enterprises, your one stop shop to making love happen. Slow love, love at first sight, unhealthy and healthy, we have it all! I’m your training manager, Maddie, please follow me to the shooting range so we can match you with the best bow to make love a reality.” The woman didn’t even glance back at me as we trotted forward, her voice flat and dull. The retail voice. 

The shooting range looked like any other shooting range, except Maddie handed me a pair of earmuffs.

“Why do I need these if we’re shooting bows?” I asked, looking at the earmuffs sitting in my hand.

Maddie turned, and winked at me. “Well the first bow we are testing is the Bow-Five-Seven Tactical Pistol. The boss said even though times have evolved, we have a brand to preserve. So muff up and aim at the target.” She waved a pink and white pistol at me, then turned back to look at the target.

I winced, and put the earmuffs over my ears.

---

Three weeks later, so short yet so long, we didn’t sleep, I had my bow...my gun. The Bow-DSR Precision. I was a Sniper Cupid, though handling weapons still felt wrong.

It was strange though, knowing that despite my wielding a gun, that it wouldn’t be used for death but for love. The practice bullets were full of glitter that got everywhere. The real bullets....one for each person in love. Most had only two names, but some had multiple names for poly relationships. 

The best part though was learning I did NOT have to wear a diaper. The wings had come in when I held and shot my Bow-DSR, but cupids nowadays wore a variety of uniforms to blend in with crowds. The Hoodie with wing slits and a cupid logo on the front was loud, but it came with comfortable pj pants. Even the suits were made for comfort, since you needed to be able to shoot your target and get out of there quickly. 

---

25 months of training and I was ready. My first foray back into the living world. The targets? 

I looked through my scope at the familiar face of Patrick. He looked gaunt with grief, listlessly stirring his coffee. I felt my heart tug in pain, could I really make him fall in love with someone else? But knowing he was still sad, he still missed me, knowing that it was hurting him so much all this time later...

I took aim and fired. 

Right in the heart.

I turned and looked down the scope at a different guy, this one’s name was Wallace. He was typing into his computer and sipping a hot chocolate with extra mini marshmallows. An accountant I think.

Another shot. 

I only stayed long enough to see Wallace look up from his cocoa at the same time as Patrick looked up from his coffee. The connection was visible as Wallace waved and said something, I was too far away to hear, and Patrick went to join him.

And then I left.

After all, Death had promised me I would see Patrick again one day, and in the meantime...

I wanted him to be happy.

After all, a Cupid wants people to feel love.

#writing prompt #reddit #short story #love #gay #death tw #writing #long post

[nesswrites]

I had considered myself lucky up until now. The villagers protected me despite the transformation, locking me in my house so I wouldn't afflict any others with my condition.

Years ago when I had been bitten, I had started packing my things to leave, wished the rest of the town goodbye. I had plans to go far away, where no humans were, and live in solitude.

But the townspeople, Old Bertrand the Baker, Willow the Dairy Farmer and her 10 strong sons, the girls down at the pub, even Tiffany the town guard, they all refused to let me do that to myself. Instead, they helped me build barricades around my little cottage, easy to drop down when the full moon came. Along with the chain and collar I had bolted to the stone fireplace myself. Tight when I transformed, but as the beast I had no thumbs to unlatch the collar.

But now....

The decree hung loosely upon my door. On half the doors in town. A new lord, appointed by the king, was claiming our homes for his men. We all had to be moved out within two months. Two moons of time, and my home, my carefully secured domicile, would be lost.

It hadn't escaped notice either that the untouched houses were those that belonged to single women or families with daughters. Willow with her 10 sons was being asked to leave, but Tiffany and her 6 daughters, not one over 15, were left behind.

And myself...despite being a single woman, the rumors by now had surely reached the Lord and the army. A cursed girl. A witch. A monster.

Partially true, all of those tales.

But now...

I begrudgingly started packing my things. It wasn't much, I'd had the bag planned from the time I was turned, after all. Easy to grab and go.

A cough behind me broke me out of my packing. "Ahem....Lyra. What do you think you are doing?"

I turned, wincing as I saw Tiffany's bulk in my doorway. She had taught me to fight, as she taught all the town's children. As she taught her own daughters.

"I figured, I was asked to leave and I can't be living with anyone, so I may as well start going now so I'm not a danger to anyone else on the road."

Tiffany looked thoughtful. "Aye, lass, I figured you'd do as much. 'tis why I came here when I saw those confounded papers about town. However, we have a plan for that, if you'd be so kind as to come to the council meeting tonight."

I stared dumbly at her, my mouth half open. Tiffany raised an eyebrow at me and tapped her foot. I gulped and nodded.

---

That night, the council was packed with the adults of the town. When I arrived, I could hear shouting and arguing from outside, along with punctuated versions of "this uppity lord" and "purebred mongrel". It seemed everyone was upset.

As I entered, however, the arguments stopped, and all eyes were on me.

Bertrand, at the head of the table, was the first to speak. "Come here, Lyra, and hear our plan." He gestured at the empty chair next to him, and continued to speak as I walked up. "We have known for some time that a new lord would be appointed our lands eventually, and like all new lords, he is of the mind of replacing our people with his own, profiting off of the homes our mothers and fathers built long ago.

"However, as we have been planning since young Lyra was bitten, we can barricade our own homes as well. The secondary safety measures can keep out a werewolf, so a human soldier will be hard pressed to find a way in without resorting to fire. However, we don't plan to die in flames.

"Lyra, child, we plan to lock our own doors and let you wander free. We have been planning this for awhile, as locking you up and listening to your howling breaks all our hearts. If you wander freely, the rumor of a huge beast haunting our city will come true. And when the soldiers come, the wolf shall have freedom. When the Lord marches in, you will be free. Do you wish to accept this risk?"

I looked at the faces around me. Eyes, shining with hope. Not one of them afraid I would hurt them? Not one afraid I would turn on those I care about. I gulped nervously, and then met Tiffany's eyes. There was a light in them, shining brightly. More than hope, she believed in me.

My own voice was distant to my ears. "Yes, I can try."

---

Moon bright and shiny in sky. No leather noose on neck this time. Freedom?

Bang bang bang from the...door? Yeah, it's a door, can't open with paws. Normally has bar but not this time. Seems....loose? Oh right, the human me left the bar off this time. Remember...have to remember...

Bang bang CRASH.

Door open!! There's men with pointy things in my territory. The one who broke my door, his eyes meet mine for a second. My nose twitches. he smells of fear. Did he...mark my territory? He lets out a shriek and turns to run. Oh a chase!

I leap on his back and bite. His screaming stops, his eyes stay open. I shake him once to be sure. Oops, I think I killed him?

I see another soldier, banging on another door trying to get in. My nose puts a name to the door. That's Bertrand's house!! His smell was there on full moons when he'd be outside my cage to sing with me.

I howled a greeting and the soldier turned. This one yelled something, and pulled a shiny sword from his waist.

I greeted him with my jaws as well.

All through the town, soldiers either ran or died.

----

The next day, I woke up in a barn and puked, remembering the blood I had shed.

Each body on my conscience, the more my stomach rebelled.

Tiffany was there though, rubbing my back and making me drink water.

And a week later, the lord had a new pronouncement.

We could keep our homes. As long as we kept the beast contained.

#writing prompt #reddit writing prompt #short story #werewolf #creative writing

[nesswrites]

Skyrim Rambles

Okay, so I'm playing skyrim again, this round as an Imperial Khajit, but as I go through this, having played both Imperials and Stormcloaks (I alternate my files to make it more interesting)....I have opinions.

FIRST from a logistical and "connection" standpoint, if you go into Skyrim blind to the internal politics, the Stormcloaks are actually "better" in a lot of ways. Ralof and Ulfric know you were innocent and about to be killed, and no matter how other Stormcloaks feel, they are willing to accept and protect you. Meanwhile, on the other end, Legate Rikke was going to have you executed even though you weren't on the list.

SECOND, FUCKING HADVAR. Look, I love Hadvar, he's great, he and Ralof are ex boyfriends. But he's also a goddamn moron. Man couldn't write us a recommendation letter? Give us a signet? Also like, he heads off to Solitude first, while we play message boy for his family to the Jarl, go through the Barrow, and likely defeat a dragon before we head to solitude ourselves (story wise). Hell, I went and got the rest of my Fus Roh Dah before heading to Solitude this time, and took the scenic route past the college of winterhold. Hadvar arrives after you, who he didn't even write a letter for, after sending you to THE SAME WOMAN that was gonna murder you, and hope she believes you.

THIRD... while everyone likes to compare the Stormcloaks to some unsavory racist types (and it is earned in some ways) they are very much also an equivalent analogy to Native Americans. The Dunmer settled primarily in Windhelm, with the stormcloaks. Windhelm, despite being the racism capital, is the city that opened their gates to the refugees. There's tons of other cities, many far more pleasant, and yet most of the dunmer are in Windhelm. The soldiers also recommend going to the Dunmer shops for buying/selling, and I'm sorry to the shopkeeper but he's just nice Hisoka in my mind. They also never run to the cringey "one of the good ones" language if you're a Dunmer or Argonnian or Khajit, they just accept this warrior based entirely on "Ulfric and Ralof say they are cool".

Adding in I don't think making the Dunmer live in the slums or making Argonnians live outside the walls is cool, but the slums read more like that's where the refugee camp was, inside the walls for protection. I am all for eat the rich but also most family homes in skyrim are probably built by your grandpa. And if we wanna go there, why is the Dragonborn able to own like 12 properties, not rent any out, and never be home other than to get money from their spouse.

Third and a half - while not related, a BIG part of the conflict is after Windhelm was so accepting of the Dunmer / dark elves, the light elves come flouncing in and make it illegal to worship their main god, Talos. The Dunmer don't care and in some cases even think this is a stupidly bad ruling, but they are caught up in the blame. ESPECIALLY since the Thalmor / Altmer themselves are the kind of assholes who would probably run a smear campaign against the Dunmer.

Fourth, the imperials are also fucking racist. Be a khajit sometime and tell me they're not as you hear the same three lines again and again. "Awwh did someone steal your sweetroll", "SKYRIM BELONGS TO THE NORDS" "Watch your back sneak-thief". Also when they defeat Ulfric and take over Windhelm, things do not change for the Dunmer nor the Argonnians, nothing gets better, and that drunk racist douchebag still wanders around town screaming at people because he is essential for a fishing quest. They have almost no Dunmer in solitude. They are not opening their gates to refugees. They're the nice shiny capitol city that doesn't let the rabble pollute the streets.

Extras:

On the things I like about Imperials - Hadvar may be stupid but I love him. Rikke may have wanted to kill me in cold blood, but now I'm her little meow meow, and she trusts me. The high queen of Skyrim is there, as is the Bard's College. The imperial drip is better than the stormcloak drip.

The gay rights is great. Ulfric and Galmar came to my Lesbian Lizard Stormcloak wedding in my other file. I presume Legate Rikke or someone similar will come to my lesbian cat's wedding. No comment about how i only play lesbians. I used to have a gay boy cat married to Derkeethus but.....my himbo lizard husband and the only man I enjoy courting.....He's SO broken and stupid. Man running from Solitude down to his original home every single day. At normal running speed. And hope I don't follow him because dragons always love attacking. Meanwhile my preferred wives are lizard lady what sometimes gets murdered if you don't solve the Windhelm murders asap, and strong orc woman whose one desire is to NOT marry a man, but if you are a guy character don't worry she doesn't mind marrying you for the alliance (though she reads very lesbian)

#skyrim #I don't even like either side all that much #but stormcloaks kinda get a worse rap than they are #Plus #for the head of the stormcloaks Ulfric was sure cheerful about me getting married #like this man got an invite to some Argonnian and Orc wedding and went FUCK YEAH THATS MY GIRL

[nesswrites]

Mary-Lou sighed...

It was the middle of summer, the air so hot all day and all night. Even the cold water from the tap came out warm this time of year, and condensation clung heavily to the outside of the freezer.

The ac was broken and it wasn't going to be fixed for a whole week. The landlord had decreased the rent for everyone because Mr. Bridgermont across the way had threatened to sue, he was a lawyer, after all. After that, the landlord had begrudgingly offered everyone a decrease, and Mr. Bridgermont had received several gift baskets of cookies and casseroles.

But until the AC was fixed, it was fucking HOT.

Mary-Lou popped a bowl of ice in front of her box fan, and plopped herself in the breeze with her work laptop. She was working from home, but only because her boss didn't have to pay for office space. Instead, he checked out a room from the library every couple weeks for team meetings, and everyone simply worked from home.

The eight hours dragged on. During the breaks, Mary-Lou replenished the bowl of ice, but otherwise it was hot and humid and GROSS.

Her ears twitched gently. Her paws clacked across the keyboard, the orange tabby fur a blur. Only a few more minutes left and....she ....was....done!

She grinned, logged out, and went to start dinner. As the water was coming to a boil, she heard the lock click in the door. She turned to grin at her girlfriend, Sasha, and blew a kiss as she poured the noodles in.

Sasha grinned back, her long ears twitching happily. "I'm gonna go hop in the shower babe! I'll be right back out but I stink!"

Mary-Lou grinned at her girlfriend's pun and went back to cooking dinner as the pipes groaned. It was hot and humid, but she was happy, and tonight, she was going to propose.

#short story #original content #writing #romantic #fxf #wlw #lesbian #lgbtqia+ fiction #mary-lou is trans! she is an orange tabby and we support her #furry

[nesswrites]

"Hey sweetie, my boss told me I'll have to leave town to go to a conference, I should be home in a few days!" Jessica leaned against the doorframe of my office, smiling at me brightly. As always, her makeup was perfect, her long blonde hair pulled into a professional yet stylish ponytail.

I stood to give her a kiss. "Call me when you're on the way home, sweetheart. I'll make dinner for when you get back!" Behind me, the excel sheets blinked on my computer steadily, from the boring accounting job I did from home. Mostly freelance, to give me plenty of time to enjoy my fabulous wife.

Jessica leaned down into the kiss, her bubblegum-flavored lips brushing against mine. Despite the professional makeup, she always had a top layer of bubblegum lip gloss over her lipstick, because she'd loved the flavor since she was little. Finding different color shades of bubblegum lip gloss to gift her every so often was the highlight of every month.

Jessica whispered in my ear. "It will be in Toronto, if you want me to pick up anything for you, just text, babe. Boss said not to tell many people, it's a big client, but if you want anything at all, don't hesitate." Her lips brushed against my earlobe in a final kiss before she flounced upstairs to grab her always-ready suitcase, leaving me feeling weak in the knees.

As soon as her car pulled out, heading towards the airport, I locked all the doors. Safety first, even if she came home having forgotten something, she'd push the buzzer or type our special code in the alarm. Jessica always stressed that she wanted me safe whenever she had to leave.

Inside my office, I pulled the door closed, locking it behind me, and then put in a code Jessica didn't know about. On my windows, reflective, explosion-proof glass slid down. Over the door, more fortified glass. Lowering from the ceiling were three new computer screens, one with more accounts, including the private charter to Toronto, and the money Jessica would need to schmooze up with her target. One screen showed the map, the little flicker of Jessica's tracker, carefully hidden in her neck years before we'd met, indicating where she was. Five minutes from the plane, now.

The third screen...It showed a pasty old man, his white skin hanging flaccid on his face. His eyes were small and beady, and sweat clung permanently to his jowls. His grey hair was brushed carefully over a growing bald spot, and his mouth was full of fake white teeth.

He was a monster. His company only used cheap labor in far away countries, breaking up unions with guns. His current wife was 40 years younger than he was, and she was barely allowed to go in public. All his prior wives had died under mysterious circumstances.

He needed to die, and Jessica was the best...

But I was worried. Lately, I'd been slipping Jessica safer missions, but as her handler, I couldn't make it obvious. I couldn't let her know I was the one holding her back. She'd complained about it right before I found this mission, but even still I worried.

And I couldn't admit I was worried, because Jessica didn't know I was her handler. Didn't know that I knew she was an assassin. To all outsiders, she was a high ranking sales executive, who DID go to big conferences in the industry, who had even given a TED talk on marketing to a younger audience. And to all outsiders, I was an accountant, a short and chubby little woman who was hired freelance to clean up accounts after people quit, or died, or just made mistakes.

Lying to each other was the worst part.

I hadn't even known I was her handler until after our wedding, we had both been so careful. I would never schedule dates to be when "Assassin J" was out of town, because I had to be available for J's needs. And Jessica wouldn't schedule dates for when she was gone, because she wasn't there.

It wasn't until I'd checked the tracking on "J" right after sending them on an emergency mission, and Jessica having to leave suddenly to go to "an emergency sales meeting" that I'd felt the inkling of suspicion, and checking "J's" tracker, I'd seen them hurtling towards the airport away from my house.

And then Jessica having the sheer balls to ask her handler to make sure her new wife was protected while Assassin J was away. Not enough balls to invite me to the wedding, not that her shadowy handler would even go, but enough balls to ask me to protect her wife.

On the screen, Jessica's tracker blipped, the plane was taking off. I counted down in my head. In roughly three minutes, she would call her handler.

Two minutes.

One minute.

RING RING.

The phone blared and the headset with the voice modifier dropped down from the ceiling. I popped it over my head and clicked the "accept call" button.

Jessica's voice came cheerfully through the headset.

"Hey Boss! So I read the file, anything I need to know?"

I looked at my own file carefully. "Well, J, the target has fairly heavy security with him at all times, except when he's in his Penthouse suite. However, they will be patrolling the outside of the suite, the floors above and below, and the hotel lobby. When you reach location, you will be invited to the same hotel - you're staying two floors below him, and a dress will be provided. There is a conference and a sales pitch meeting to attend, red tie, try to schmooze to him like he was a normal client. If you're lucky, he'll invite you to his room.

"If his wife is there, knock her out gently, and then help get her out and to your room after the target is taken care of. She isn't the one who hired us, but our client has provided her with documents, money, and a plane ticket to make her escape.

"And stay safe, I don't want to tell your wife that you got hurt making a sale."

Jessica's breathy laugh came through the headset. "I would never worry her! You're still protecting our house, right? I know she thinks I worry too much, but in our industry, we make so many enemies."

I chuckled as well. "Your wife is as safe as possible, she activated the security as soon as you were out the door. And it would take someone exceptionally clever to find out who you are, J, I only learned your identity when you told me your wife's name, someone else would have to work VERY hard to find you."

I couldn't see it, but I knew Jessica was nodding. "Thank you, Boss. I'll have to call her when I land, she is bad about asking for gifts, and I want to get her something, and Toronto...hmm."

My face flushed a bit with pleasure, though Jessica couldn't see. "Well, J, the maple syrup is always good, but if you're looking for something a bit fancier, I hear there is a shoe museum in Toronto you can visit, or the baseball team is quite popular."

Jessica's voice came back a bit muffled, as if she was hiding a smile behind her hand. "PFFF, well I don't know about shoes, but baseball...I'll keep that in mind."

I grinned as we ended the conversation. As her boss, I could suggest things. As her wife, I felt guilty, even if the Blue Jays were my favorite team.

As her wife, I pulled out my phone, and sent a quick text, "See you when you're home! I don't know what I want, just get me syrup or something! <3"

----

Three days later, Jessica was on the plane home. Her mission had been a success. The old man's young wife was currently starting a new life in Paris, where one of my agents was helping her settle in. The old man's death hadn't hit the news yet, but that stood to reason, his body had disappeared without a trace from a penthouse apartment, surrounded by guards, at the same time as his young wife did. For all intents and purposes, it looked like the two had gone off somewhere. I knew his body wouldn't be found for a long while, it had been on a third plane, where it had been wrapped in chains, then dropped casually into the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.

My handler computers were tucked away. My cell phone was in my pocket, the handler phone app (which automatically activated voice masking when a call came to that number) quiet as Jessica pulled closer.

In the oven, I was cooking a nice baked chicken, a potato casserole, and Jessica's favorite, garlic roasted brussels sprouts.

Even my accounting client was happy, I'd fixed an error that was causing miscalculations of over a thousand dollars, and had identified the bug in his program that had been causing it.

And best of all, I'd found a black bubblegum lipgloss, which I'd carefully wrapped in a tiny box, with a bright pink ribbon, for Jessica when she came home.

When she was ready to tell me her job, I was ready to tell her mine. But in the meantime, we were happy.

Your spouse is leading a secret double life as an assassin, trying their best to keep it secret from you. This has never really worked, because, unbeknownst to them, you are actually their handler.

#long post #creative writing #OH SUCH A LONG POST #and yes lesbians #and no resolution to the initial plot point.

[nesswrites]

NCIS Season 17 Part 1 Liveblogging:

Ziva! Also Gibbs, she was right, you should have looked for her you should NOT have been afraid of what you found.

Confirmation that Tony looked and found Ziva? I love that for him, even though I wish we could have had a glimpse of DiNozzo.

Gibbs getting to be a father again to a neighbor kid is very sweet and fun, and it's good for him.

HOWEVER I called it, I felt that it was super sus that the kid had an American accent when his mother had the strongest British burr I've heard, and I'm counting Reeves in that. Like mom's accent didn't soften in the slightest in these past few years? Kid didn't pick up any of his mom's accent? Even with custody issues, idk I'd stay closer to my kid.

Also on that I feel bad for Phineas and for Sahar. Phineas didn't deserve to lose everything like that, he didn't deserve his gaslighting mother, and he didn't deserve to be sent away from his only friend. Sahar, she was evil but no one deserves r*pe and forced pregnancy.

NCIS really skirting the line of what is acceptable, beating and torturing bad guys is bad, guys.

It is nice to see Kasie more in her own this season. Last season they were trying too hard to write her as Abby 2.0. This season they're letting her be her own person.

Haha gamers

Honestly the teddy bear shooting game seems fun.

Palmer knowing what furries is intrigues me. I know I'm a furry, but Palmer, bud, do you have a fursona? I need to know. Or does Breena have a fursona.

I'M SORRY BUT THEY ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN PUTTING LIQUID IN THE COFFEE CUPS RECENTLY? AFTER 15 SEASONS OF EMPTY CUP GAGS, ACTUALLY SEEING LIQUID IS WILD.

Gibbs knows what an emoji is. Gibbs' new character arc is he's secretly been taking a tech literacy class to prank McGee.

I like how the Ziva/Sahar arc is "mostly" wrapped up mid-season. I have the other half of the season to watch still, but it does make it more mysterious what is to come. Last season, the Vance/CIA/Sec. of Defense arc took the whole thing to cover.

Jeez Sloane and Gibbs need to stop dancing around the issue.

#ncis #long post #ncis season 17

[nesswrites]

Keeping up on the writing things almost every day, today I want to talk about Mercedes Lackey, specifically her 500 Kingdoms series.

First, her series is by far and large inspired by Sir Terry Pratchett and Discworld, and the more you read the more her references to Terry become obvious.

Second, it's a very interesting setting for a writer to work with, and for fanfiction writers or other writers, not that hard to take inspiration from. The world of the 500 kingdoms is controlled by fate, the looming fate of the Tradition. Much like in Discworld, a lot of this fate comes in the form of stories and how they twist a magical world. How it will twist and change people if they don't comply.

It makes an ordinarily kind woman into an evil stepmother, or makes her invalid when she refuses to become evil (Beauty and the Werewolf). It makes it so Ella Cinders and her actual evil step mother have a fate where Ella would fall in love with a prince (even though the prince was far too young) and Ella had to fight it to become a Godmother. And it ties pushing these even when "the prince would far rather fall in love with another prince, thank you very much!"

Now, Mercedes Lackey is a good author, but she enjoys writing romance, and the 500 Kingdoms series reads very much as her wanting to write romance in the Discworld setting, albeit with many changes due to copyright and being a published author of her own accord. Her other books, romance is very much a side plot if it is even there, and the 500 Kingdoms is one of her less popular series.

(As an aside if you read this far and want to check her out without as much romance - her Joust series is one of my other favorites by her - set in fantasy Egypt, but it's about raising and riding dragons, and the romance when it does come in is not a focal point. It's a sideplot.)

However, either as a fan work or an inspired work taking influence from both her and Sir Pratchett, I kind of want to play with the idea of one of those gay princes or princesses. Someone who legend would have fall in love and live happily ever after, but the magic can't do anything to break their orientation, so it struggles to find a happily ever after (but gay).

Of course, I also kind of want the selfish future of some of those - my first Mercedes Lackey book was One Good Night, where Princess Andie falls in love with the dragon Peri, and he is turned human via magic. A future story with one of their children being a were-dragon, or even a new tradition that had formed of the rulers of this tiny kingdom only taking unconventional spouses, like having one of Andie and Peri's children marrying a dwarf, or an ogre, and using that to forge new alliances would be fun.

#long post #text post #mercedes lackey #honestly i do enjoy her writing because she likes to subvert tropes a lot #sure there's a magical focus on virginity #but the main plot point it drives is having unicorns being annoying #plus she likes to prove her own characters wrong #because Ella for example assumed a princess would be stupid #ella is a likable character #but she was proven wrong #when the princess almost brained her #and in one good night #gina assumes andie would be useless being a princess #and Andie is wonderful #I also liked andie because she had glasses which i rarely read in these fantasy novels

[nesswrites]

FINISHED SEASON 16 REACTIONS:

Damn they were both actually spying on Vance NOT because of racism? And also just "we were sus of you but turns out y'all are the only good people here" is very funny.

Fornell's daughter my girl? What the fuck baby (I know the spoiler about what happens to her in season 18 and I am NOT ready actually, I like the fornell family)

It is increasingly funny that in a "blink and you'll miss it" scene of Vance deleting the picture of him and the spy who spied on him, they flash his phone and I need to grab a photo sometime except paramount plus is tricky to do that on as it gets small. BUT ANYWAY the photos you see like the default government building, a recent picture of Kayla, and then a photo of his son taken like 6 seasons ago but it's at the top of his phone's gallery implying he took the image recently.

ZIVA CONFIRMED!!!!!!

Anyway I'm so glad that Mitch Pileggi was actually a good guy because Supernatural made him a bad guy but to me he'll always be Director Skinner X-Files

McGee acting surprised by "Gibbs killed the man that shot his wife" SIR YOU KNEW THIS. YOU WERE WITH ABBY WHEN SHE DISCOVERED THIS. YOU WERE THERE WHEN THE DAUGHTER OF THE BAD GUY KIDNAPPED GIBBS AND WHEN HER BROTHER TRIED TO KILL YOU ALL. They literally TOLD YOU this McGee.

It's about time they burnt rule 10 actually. That one is broken so often, and then Gibbs also gets grumpy when you don't break it anyway.

Bishop accusing two of her coworkers of murder. She DEF worked homeland holy shit.

The ComicCon plot was great but you can't just go "Invite Torres" then "Invite Gibbs?" as your sixth invite? You bring Kaylee! SHE IS A NERD GUYS.

TRANS ACTOR JJ HAWKINS? HOLY SHIT. He was only in the show for like 5 minutes but he absolutely stole the scene he was in. Torres WISHES he had that grace.

Torres you are so lucky Jimmy saved your ass you son of a bitch, Delilah bought those tickets with her money, and she can and will have killed you if there wasn't a replacement. I get the whole "we need bribery" but you can't just give away $4500 of comic con tickets purchased by someone else.

Gibbs def needs a nap.

I appreciate them telling Torres "bro it's never your fault if you get roofied bud, don't go beating yourself up" because Torres would never be the type to blame another victim in his situation, so he needs to not blame himself.

Torres approaching his drinking problem? Realism in my show?

HHH stop making platonic friends wanna FUCK. I LIKE platonic Bishop and Torres.

Ducky as historian is a great way to keep him in the show while leaving us with majority Palmer actually. Palmer earned his place and having him play second fiddle to Ducky was starting to feel forced since Palmer has been in charge for a long while now.

The episode where Palmer deals with his father in law and talks about how he has two dads in Gibbs and Ducky? I cried like a bitch. Also his brother in law immediately knowing it was Palmer that saved him and not Ed? Classic. Palmer holds him accountable.

Anyway, Ziva CONFIRMED. I fucking adore Ziva so much.

Okay FINALLY watching seasons 16-current on NCIS.

Still in season 16 but I'm dropping some of my reactions so far.

I love that Torres and Palmer got into a fight at a wine and paint workshop, not because the guys were implying they were gay...but because they guys implying they were gay were being homophobic about it. Half expected Nick to kiss Jimmy just to piss them off.

Vance, dear, you really should vet your romantic interests better.

On Vance, glad they finally acknowledged his son? Apparently he is staying with his aunt but how long has this been happening? I honestly figured they'd killed his son off a couple seasons back, since he had this whole thing with his daughter's friend being a delinquent, but his son wasn't mentioned nor did he show up. At least they've acknowledged the boy.

ZIVA CONFIRMED?

Back to Vance but why is it with the CIA dude and now Mitch Pileggi's character (down to the southern accent he used in Supernatural) whenever there's a whole plotline that will end in Vance being hurt in some way, it reeks of racist reasons? Old white dudes in this show just HATE Vance. Hate him for better reasons, thanks.

Why do people keep putting Gibbs in charge of NCIS. You'd think by now they'd have a different senior field agent or an assistant director to step in, and not the dude who goes on cases and refuses to sign paperwork.

At this point I think Gibbs fully understands tech but refuses to acknowledge he does. Man hung up on Ducky in facetime then went "what's a facetime :3"

I love Palmer so much, he's great.

Whatever Torres and Bishop have going on? I want it. I know later they make it some romance bullshit but right now in the platonic friends era? That's great. Honestly they make great platonic friends they're more ♦ than they are ♥.

I know the next episode is gonna have Delilah, but that's seriously her only appearance this season? What the fuck honestly. I love Delilah.

It still bugs me that between seasons 14 and 15 Quinn just disappeared with a throwaway acknowledgement of "went to care for her mom" that is blink and you miss it honestly. It bugs me so much.

NCIS give me a gay character that doesn't die challenge (I miss Dorney still). Or at least acknowledge how bisexual Torres is. Man has more ex boyfriends than he has sense, and he won't admit it at all.

Still acknowledging this is in fact copaganda, but at least they show that cops suck ass and are dicks more than other copaganda shows? Though honestly it is still wild how the military cop show is one of the more liberal ones in political views, despite killing their gays. I watch it mostly because it's a comfort thing at this point.

#ncis #ncis season 16 #I will probably liveblog other seasons #i enjoy liveblogging and of my one friend who has seen ncis #i don't wanna overwhelm her #i will likely start liveblogging other things I watch too

[nesswrites]

Okay FINALLY watching seasons 16-current on NCIS.

Still in season 16 but I'm dropping some of my reactions so far.

I love that Torres and Palmer got into a fight at a wine and paint workshop, not because the guys were implying they were gay...but because they guys implying they were gay were being homophobic about it. Half expected Nick to kiss Jimmy just to piss them off.

Vance, dear, you really should vet your romantic interests better.

On Vance, glad they finally acknowledged his son? Apparently he is staying with his aunt but how long has this been happening? I honestly figured they'd killed his son off a couple seasons back, since he had this whole thing with his daughter's friend being a delinquent, but his son wasn't mentioned nor did he show up. At least they've acknowledged the boy.

ZIVA CONFIRMED?

Back to Vance but why is it with the CIA dude and now Mitch Pileggi's character (down to the southern accent he used in Supernatural) whenever there's a whole plotline that will end in Vance being hurt in some way, it reeks of racist reasons? Old white dudes in this show just HATE Vance. Hate him for better reasons, thanks.

Why do people keep putting Gibbs in charge of NCIS. You'd think by now they'd have a different senior field agent or an assistant director to step in, and not the dude who goes on cases and refuses to sign paperwork.

At this point I think Gibbs fully understands tech but refuses to acknowledge he does. Man hung up on Ducky in facetime then went "what's a facetime :3"

I love Palmer so much, he's great.

Whatever Torres and Bishop have going on? I want it. I know later they make it some romance bullshit but right now in the platonic friends era? That's great. Honestly they make great platonic friends they're more ♦ than they are ♥.

I know the next episode is gonna have Delilah, but that's seriously her only appearance this season? What the fuck honestly. I love Delilah.

It still bugs me that between seasons 14 and 15 Quinn just disappeared with a throwaway acknowledgement of "went to care for her mom" that is blink and you miss it honestly. It bugs me so much.

NCIS give me a gay character that doesn't die challenge (I miss Dorney still). Or at least acknowledge how bisexual Torres is. Man has more ex boyfriends than he has sense, and he won't admit it at all.

Still acknowledging this is in fact copaganda, but at least they show that cops suck ass and are dicks more than other copaganda shows? Though honestly it is still wild how the military cop show is one of the more liberal ones in political views, despite killing their gays. I watch it mostly because it's a comfort thing at this point.

#ncis #a long ramble honestly #i'm mid season 16 and i have FEELINGS #but it's ok #i will likely post more of these bulleted lists

[nesswrites]

Say what you will about the copaganda in NCIS because I don't watch it for that...

I watch specifically for how explicitly married Gibbs and Fornell are.

Gibbs, breaking into a hospital because Fornell got shot: WILL HE BE OKAY Nurse: Sir you need to prepare yourself Gibbs: PREPARE MYSELF FOR WHAT MY HUSBAND WILL BE FINE

[nesswrites]

Not really an AU but, I've been thinking about my idea for an ATLA/avatar story.

Set during the time of (young) Guru Laghima, it would follow the story of the Avatar and her older sister. They are from the earth tribes, and have to flee their home after a strong, nonbending general calling himself the King of Earth and his army kill their parents.

The older sister, Sisi, is a 13 year old (at the beginning of the story) earth bender whose family had a stronger connection to the spirits than most. Sisi had been learning wood carving from her mother and earthbending construction from her father when the army destroyed their lives. She eventually grows into the person who invented the bending and solstice locks scattered through the various temples around the world, a feat which earns her the name "Lockbender".

The avatar, Mimi, is 6 at the start of their story, only just starting to learn earthbending. She is found out as the avatar because she liked to play with fire as well, able to make the fire and rocks around her dance from a young age. As she and her sister slowly travel the world, Mimi masters earthbending, then the other elements.

Laghima is a young, cocky, 16 year old airbender in the beginning, out on a nomadic voyage to learn about the world and the spirits that inhabit it. He finds the young sisters and likes to travel with them as he learns from the various places they visit.

Cheeks is Mimi's animal companion, an Iguanaparrot who they found injured. She likes to eat berries and carrots, and she picks up words to parrot relatively easily (and then just says "Berries please berries please" over and over)

The first book, Earth, is mostly slice of life of them travelling and becoming friends for 10 years until Mimi is a master earth bender and ready to learn other elements. Laghima is on and off, visiting temples and meditating with spirits a lot more than his companions. He also makes sure the two young girls are safe from danger, scouting and making sure they avoid the growing Earth army. The finale is them fleeing the Earth Kingdom, as the Earth King is crowned in the newly built Ba Sing Se.

The Second book, Fire, the companions enter the fire kingdom, and Mimi begins her fire training. Sisi, in barter for their stay, starts putting her construction and woodcarving abilities to work, helping to build and reinforce the temples, and gaining her name of Lockbender. Laghima meditates at all the temples, and floats for the first time. This book ends with Mimi being declared a master of firebending in only two years, and Cheeks picking up some fire related swear words.

Book 3, Air, the companions go to the Western Air Temple. As Mimi works on air bending and struggles to get past some blocks, Sisi works on improving the integrity of the upside down buildings. Laghima is made Mimi's part time teacher and is recognized as a Guru by his people. He hasn't yet mastered the state of mind for permanent floating, though is consistently floating with meditation. During this time, they also visit the other air temples regularly so Sisi can check the construction and install the giant airbending locks. It takes Mimi 3 years to master airbending. This season ends with the Earth king finding out about the avatar, and quietly dispatching a team to find and capture her, as the Earth Avatar is one of his citizens and therefore should listen to him.

Book 4, Water. The companions, still with Laghima, head towards the small southern water tribe to learn water bending. On the way, they instead discover some other water benders, a young new tribe in the middle of a swamp. Mimi starts to learn water bending from the swamp benders, and Laghima communes with the (while younger, still large and old) banyan grove tree, and finally learns what he needs to be weightless always. Sisi meets a swamp bender girl named Rocha who decides to join the companions (they're gay, Harold). A short bit through the book, they pick up travel to the Southern water tribe to complete Sisi's training, having gained all they could from the swamp. In the meanwhile, the earth king's team are getting ever closer. With half the book left, they complete the water training, the fastest of the elements, and are captured by the earth king's forces.

then plot, plot plot, it ends with Sisi sacrificing herself so Roche, Laghima and Mimi can escape. Mimi is a quiet avatar who spends the rest of her years trying to protect others from war. Laghima becomes the wise floating guru we hear about. Roche holds the memory of her wife dear, and retires to the banyan grove swamp where she spends years strengthening the spirit of the tree.

It's revealed also that the writer of this history is an old Mimi, with Cheeks also looking a bit grey on her shoulder (parrots live forever), looking out upon a peaceful Western Air Temple. With a small lock designed by her sister on the outside of the journal.

[nesswrites]

Soul Eater characters and their MLP Gen 4 equivalents

i will be disregarding all ships and familial relationships for this purely because it would make it WAY too complicated and this is my silly little haha. i already put too much thought into it, i cannot burden my mind with the restraint of familial and romantic relations.

first up, the main 7 characters. starting with the one who inspired this all:

Maka as Twilight Sparkle

she's got the wings, she's got the book smart, she's got the power of friendship on her side, it's perfect. this was all started b/c while rewatching the anime, we joked that Maka's dubbed voice sounded like Twilight. this one is the strongest comparison, it gets worse from here.

Soul as Spike

no offense to Soul, but he's usually secondary to Maka most of the time. snarky, sassy, and often asking questions. also, his name is Spike, Soul's got spiky hair, it makes sense.

Black☆Star as Rainbow Dash

cocky, proud, super strong, fast, and blue!! a lot of their development revolves around like valuing other people (Black☆Star is more about like,,,, becoming his own person but y'know) also they both have scratchy voices.

Tsubaki as Fluttershy

calm and mild mannered, but also on occasion has the ability to go apeshit. befriends someone who is quite strong and obnoxious that most characters find annoying.

Death the Kid as Rarity

obsessive about appearances and has a particularly fancy way of talking. pale?? distinctive hair. makes sense.

Patty as Pinkie Pie

no explanation necessary.

Liz as Apple Jack

older sister figure! blonde and realistic, kinda tough and used to having to work for stuff (though Liz doesn't have to do it too much anymore now that she and patty are chilling w/ Kid) also, AJ was the only one left of the mane 6 lol.

Crona as Princess Luna

obviously the moon connection, duh. dark aesthetic, doesn't understand other people, and gets kinda possessed by madness!! which leads into my next choice

Kishin Asura as Nightmare Moon

evil!! but also because they were a bit misunderstood. spreads their powers across the entire world. possesses someone who is also part of them. lives on the moon.

Lord Death as Princess Celestia

tall and a god figure, but also kind of royalty? super OP but also we barely get to see them fight or use their powers ever so that our lovely main characters can be the ones to defeat the big bad. questionable morals at times.

Stein as Discord

crazy ass bitch!! tall and a slightly concerning amount of people simp for them. looks stitched together, stuff sticking out of their heads.

Marie as Princess Cadance

Ox as Snips

weird hair,,,,,,,,,,

Harvar as Snails

tall?? Harvar's a spear so he's tall by default. he's also gold-ish when he's in weapon form so that counts, also pointy b/c unicorn and spear.

Jackie as Octavia

Jackie has to be Octavia b/c her name is based off of cellist Jacqueline du Pré and even though Jackie doesn't play cello, this is who she must be to fulfill her destiny. also, they both have dark hair.

Kim as DJ Pon 3 (Vinyl Scratch)

gay. unicorn, so she has magic like a witch

Kilik and the Pots as the Cutie Mark Crusaders

there's three of them and they are inseparable. do not separate them. Kilik can be Sweetie Belle b/c he's standing in the middle.

Sid as Big Mac

man of few words. super strong and ,,,,,,, angular?? idk they're both kinda blocky. sad eyes,,,,,,,, UNDERRATED.

Naigus as Zecora

doctor!!! also if i was a pony, i would have a crush on Zecora. i have a crush on Naigus. this is my reasoning.

Medusa as Chrysalis

evil. weird and confusing hair!! dark aesthetic with one accent color. insanely manipulative, undeniably slaying.

Arachne as The Storm King

this one comes as a suggestion from Tumblr mutual (and my literal current college suite mate) @xaltiide she says that this guy is "the big bad" but isn't doing Most of the bad stuff in comparison to the other villains.

and finally, my grand finale

Giriko and Justin as Flim and Flam

they suck!!!! they suck SO BAD!!!!!!!! and they're evil. HORRIBLE.

anyways, happy April fools everyone. i finished the last half of this post while an edible kicked in on a Friday night and i feel like that probably shows in what i have created, but i will stand by this.

#Adding this to my own over analyzing blog that I really should go back to #Inspire me to overanalyze my own favorite media

[nesswrites]

Bonus Pokemon Post! 

First I’ve not seen a random shiny yet but I can quickly explain why games like Legends Arceus and Scarlet/Violet seem to have higher shiny rates.

First, both games, the base shiny rate is still the same 1/4096 chance. Arceus of course gives you an up with fully researched pokemon. 

However, the open world does something funny. Because you can see if a pokemon is shiny before you encounter them, the rate has to be calculated outside of battle. And then the numbers do a little bit of funny magic.

For example, in an average screen on Violet, I can count 10-20 pokemon that I can see. For each of those pokemon, there’s still a 1/4096 chance, but because I’m seeing more at once, it’s more like a 10/4096 chance. Or a 1/410 chance. Of course the real chance is still lower, but we’re doing simple calculations here. The real crux is that it is far far easier to see 4000 pokemon within an hour than it was in any earlier games, because you aren’t battling them to see them. 

This is also why I think they took away the noise and obvious sparkles Legends had without going into the god awful “you can’t see if something is shiny until you battle them” from Sword and Shield or BDSP. It’s an okay middle ground that still makes shiny hunting somewhat difficult. 

And for those of you like me who are colorblind, they have a feature for us too! 

In autobattles, if you see a collection of pokemon you know have “close” shinies (like Pikachu), your pokemon will autobattle everything EXCEPT the shiny! That means if you see a herd of tauros, just yeet your pokemon at them, and if they kill all the Tauros, there were no shinies! 

Now if only my luck would improve!  🤣 (I’ve been playing since yellow and my only full odds shiny to date was a shinx in legends) 

[nesswrites]

*cracks knuckles*

So I’ve been rereading the Redwall series (well, half reading, half listening to the audiobooks, depending on what’s available) and I’ve remembered some of what I don’t like about Veil. 

Now, don’t get me wrong, I love the books, adore them even. They set me up on the path to being a writer before Tamora Pierce or Neil Gaiman did. 

But Veil always rubbed me the wrong way.

First things first, no one at the Abbey except for Bryony was even kind to Veil. Bella wants to act all noble and above being judgemental, but in an Abbey where she teaches all the youngsters to read and write, where anagram riddles are a fun game....she literally named the kid an anagram of Evil. Not even a mixed up one that is hard to guess, she just switched the E and V. 

Second: the biting thing. He’s seen as evil for biting...as a starving baby. While other dibbuns throughout the books bite, use knives, and have a sling to shoot rocks (Marlfox’s Dwopple constantly hurts the hare and other troupe members who care for him). Notably, he’s the only one who is actively starving while biting other creatures, the others do it to avoid baths or just to be naughty. 

Third, stealing. This one rubs me the wrong way in particular because...it’s really really hard to justify stealing as bad in the Redwall universe. Especially in Veil’s time - Bryony is a direct descendant of Gonff the Mousethief, who is still celebrated. Who continued to steal from goodbeasts throughout his life. Whose descendants all tend towards thievery, with Bryony as one of the notable exceptions to stealing - even Dandin had a few naughty moments in his timeline. There’s other celebrated and “good” thieves who are barely punished despite pilfering far more valuable things than a honeypot. 

Fourth: the fact that it’s said, by not only Bryony, but also Bella: the Friar and others always resort to blaming Veil, even in past cases where he was innocent. It would have been nice if we got this context for one chapter even, maybe with someone else taking something and Veil getting the blame, but we only had these words to go off. It’s hard to justify not stealing if you end up getting blamed even when you’re innocent, after all. 

Fifth: The Friar’s immediate resort to violence... against a child. He essentially gets a slap on the wrist for hurting a child, and the way he did it makes it seem like he’s done it before. Just without witnesses, Veil couldn’t get him in trouble before: and when he does have witnesses, the Friar is let off scott free. Which tells Veil bullying and hurting others is fine! As long as they’re weaker and named Veil. 

Lastly, the poisoning. The truly evil thing he did. It started him on the path to evil, and it IS an evil thing to do, but the road up to this was filled with turns and anytime Veil got close to turning off and doing good, he was slapped back onto the road of evil. The only one who never jeered at and mocked him was Bryony. Everybeast in the abbey acted like they knew he’d turn out this way. They claimed to be good, claimed they’d tried, but Bryony, who is incredibly kind and fair, also said that no one else tried. Either she believed in Veil’s gaslighting up to this point, or...she also saw that everyone was shunning and blaming and making Veil out to be evil at every turn. 

I just....wish Veil had actually had chances to turn good before he turned out to be evil. His chances were slim from the moment he was named Evil and considered bad for...biting when hungry. The fact that the only creature who truly treated him as if he could turn good was Bryony really makes it seem like a setup to failure. Honestly, if we got an AU where Bryony left Redwall with the babe while he was little and raised him apart from others, I’d give Veil much higher chances (though I’d probably name him like.... Goodie Tooshoos or something to really emphasize that I believe he has the capacity for good).

#redwall #outcast of redwall #Veil Sixclaw #i was gonna do a shorter post #i really don't utilize this sideblog enough #long post #text post #redwall abbey #Abbess Bryony

[nesswrites]

Also, being attracted to your parents is dumb and illogical.

What you’re attracted to is yourself, specifically your brain looks for people with specific genetic features it wants in offspring, ignoring the logistics of people not wanting kids, or being gay, or being ace. 

It’s not even logical features, sometimes it’s just dimples, freckles, or a slightly longer nose. You’re not attracted to your mom just because she and your partner both have long noses, your brain is just taking the gamble that if you have kids with said partner, your kids will have superior long noses because said trait is on both sides of the family.

It’s 2 am and I have work in the morning so it’s the perfect time for my rant about the Oedipus Complex.

Specifically in relation to Oedipus.

#im not a biologist but it's pretty easy to #figure it out #like i love glasses #a stupid biological feature to pass on but they're attractive #and i dont even want kids #im childfree and queer and ace