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themonkeycabal · 3 years

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Wandavision Ep 7 Spoilers

Spoilers below

Good morning. There's a guy power washing the sidewalks at 12:30 a.m., and the drone from the generator is drilling into my brain. So I will watch WandaVision instead of doing something I might regret.

Previously on: Wanda was getting sick of Pietro's shit. Vision knows/thinks his wife is behind all the creepy shenanigans, and he tried to escape the Hex, only to fly to pieces in the real world. I can relate.

Outside, Monica, Jimmy, and Darcy were banished from the SWORD circus by Acting Director Dick, because of course. They snuck back in, also because of course. Darcy hacked AD Dick's files and found out he's Up to Something. Then she ran to try and help Vision and got herself arrested and handcuffed to a jeep. Which is where the brave SWORD agents left her when they ran away as Wanda, attempting to save Vision, expanded the Hex, swallowing Darcy and the SWORD compound, turning it all into a sitcom circus. Well deserved. Well, not Darcy, but anyway.

AD Dick escaped. Unfortunately. But, so did Jimmy and Monica who were off to her mystery aerospace engineer friend to find a way into the Hex.

Also, Tommy and Billy have powers.

The episode 7 summary is a delight: "Two super-powered beings living ideal suburban lives suspect that everything is not as it seems." You don't say, Disney+.

Wanda wakes, regrets everything, and hides under the covers. Understandable. Cut away to her addressing the camera The Office style "Look, we've all been there. Letting our fear and anger get the best of us; intentionally expanding the boarders of the false world we created". (cut to screaming running SWORD minions lol).

The boys come to get her, their game is freaking out. The video game controllers can't decide what decade they're in and are glitching it up.

Billy says his head feels weird and noisy. Wanda isn't terribly responsive. Mommy needs some her time.

"As punishment for my reckless evening, I plan on taking a quarantine-style staycation. A whole day. Just to myself. That'll show me." lol

Wanda eventually rouses herself, goes downstairs in her robe and sweats, ignores the boys fighting over a video game controller, and goes for the sugariest cereal. The milk container keeps glitching, she tries very very hard to ignore that.

Interesting Office-style opening credits, where it's just her name on everything. Vision is only added at the end, with the tag "Created by Wanda Maximoff".

Out in the real world, what is the point of SWORD? Like how do they have jurisdiction? Where is SHIELD. Director Mack, wtf, dude?

Anyway, now that part of their camp has been swallowed by the hex, they're further out, staring at the angry glowing force-field. AD Dick is a dick. He wants to know what's happening with the broadcast. His little minion says the signal's gone. Ominously he says "we launch today". Mmmm, what delightfully heavy-handed dipshittery will we have to endure?

Back inside. Vision wakes in the field at the edge of town that is now a circus. And lots and lots of clowns. He gets yelled at by a strongman who seems to think Vision is the new clown and tells him he's late for rehearsal with the escape artist. Who is Darcy. lol

"I put in for the bearded lady. But this alabaster complexion wasn't fooling anyone."

Darcy is chained to a ye olde fire engine or tractor or something. Vision walks up to her making a weird face and kind of waving his hand back and forth between them.

"You don't remember me from last night? We locked eyes, there was an unspoken understanding." Darcy tells him "um, hard pass." lol She busts out of her chains and walks away, Vision chases after.

Back at home, Wanda wants to know if the boys have seen dad, they haven't, but Billy wants to know about that whole thing Uncle Pietro said about dad being dead again. Wanda says Pietro is not their uncle. The boys don't understand, and Wanda has a little rambling breakdown about how she has no answers and maybe there's no meaning to anything ha ha don't worry boys mommy's just having a little depression.

Agnes knocks and then, you know, strolls in, when Wanda magics the door open.

"Hi Agnes. I'd get up but I just don't, ahahahah, want to." If I was Billy or Tommy I'd mount a search for dad. Stat.

Agnes: "I think I got there in the nick of time, 'cause she was one split-end away from cutting her own bangs."

(It's 1 a.m. and I swear to God, that man is still power-washing the sidewalks.)

Agnes suggests the boys go with her and give mommy that 'me time' she so desperately needs. The boys are reluctant but Wanda is ecstatic.

Once alone with her certainly soggy cereal, Wanda settles back to watch crappy daytime TV. But, damn it, the furniture is glitching through the eras.

"I'm fine! I'm fine hahahah. *sigh* I'm fine. i'm fine. … I'm fine."

In the real world. Jimmy and Monica are still on the move. The file on project whatever it was from last episode (Cataract), that Darcy forwarded to Jimmy's email, has finally found its way to him. It's R&D reports.

Oh, that asshole, AD Dick was trying to bring Vision back online. Monica puts the pieces together "Heyward wants his sentient weapon back."

Jimmy says somebody has to tell Wanda.

Good thing they arrive at the other side of the Hex, I guess? Where Monica has another team waiting. An Agent Goodner. They brought her like some sort of big Mars rover thingy.

Vision is still trying to talk to Darcy. "You tried to help me." "Doubtful. I'm notoriously self-involved."

lol, some amusing back and forth. Darcy is an f'ing delight and I don't just say that because I am obviously hideously biased.

Vision distracts her with a mime and takes the opportunity to do his brain mojo on her, waking her up. "Part of me secretly wanted a guest spot on this show, but seriously that sucked."

"Dr. Lewis. I have questions." "I have answers."

And then they steal the funnel cake truck.

"Dr. Lewis, my questions. Are my children safe?" "That I don't know." "And who was that Pietro?" "Beats me."

Wanda is still working on her bowl of cereal. Give it up, sister. The house redecorates itself around her.

Uh-oh, in her talking head segment, about how she doesn't understand whats going on, the person behind the camera speaks, and asks if maybe it's what she deserves. "You're not supposed to talk."

Commercial time. For a depression medication. "Nexus, a unique antidepressant that works to anchor you back to your reality. Or the reality of your choice."

Back in Westview. The boys are hanging at Agnes's. Billy has a rabbit. As happens at your crazy neighbor's house. But, he says he likes it there, because it's quiet. "You're quiet, Agnes. On the inside." J'ACCUSE, AGNES!

Back at Monica's backup camp, she's getting suited up in her SWORD astronaut suit. Jimmy's sad because Darcy's missing the fun. But, Monica will rescue her. SWORD is worse than SHIELD for slapping their name all over everything.

Monica and the little rover zoom off to the hex. Should she really go that fast? Maybe this is something to take cautiously? Oh, and look, she hit it hard and she's stuck. The Hex doesn't want to let her in, but she keeps trying. And now the Hex is eating into the rover — sorry, *re-writing* it. Well that was a dumb plan. Sorry guys, but come on.

Monica escapes, but the hex eats the rover and then spits it out, the front half transformed into a truck. Monica is shocked, Jimmy calls for a medic, and as they run forward, Jimmy, who has known Monica for like two days, recognizes she's got 'I'm a heroic dummy' face on and he's all "noooooo!". She runs for the hex and pushes her way in.

This is a really long sequence of her going through the hex. Like … too long. Sorry, but it is. There's a whole thing where she's hearing voices from moments in her life, and she hears Carol tell her how she's a tough kid, and now Monica is Filled With Resolve and breaks through the Hex, still in her Astronaut outfit, so like she resisted the sitcom wardrobe department.

I enjoy this show, but there are moments of hokeyness that I find very trying.

The hex rewrites you at a basic level as you pass through it. So, third time through and Monica's eyes are glowy blue and she can, like, see electrical currents, or electromagnetic fields (it looks like). Trippy. She can see power along the power lines, fields around streetlights. Closing her eyes and shaking her head makes it all go away. Of course.

Meanwhile, Darcy and Vision are on their slow-speed getaway in the Funnel Cake truck. She's trying to catch him up on what's happened since he's been dead. They keep hitting red lights and obstacles. Vision thinks Wanda's doing it to keep him from getting home. "I'm not amused," he tells the camera with a very not amused face on. lol

Vision is trying to understand what he is now. It's not going well. "My corporeal form was born from Ultron's plan for global genocide?" "Correct-o." Darcy might not be the best person to be explaining this to him.

"What am I now?" Poor Vision.

Darcy takes a deep breath. In fairness, she looks like maybe she'd rather not be the one doing the explaining, either. "Honestly, I'm a STEM type of lady, so I thought she just flipped a switch on your head and brought you back to life. What I don't get is why you can't leave the hex."

Vision is having an existential crisis. But, Darcy assures him that based on her week-long experience as a fan of WandaVision, he and Wanda do really love each other. So, there's that. "You belong together," says the shameless shipper.

Meanwhile, Monica has arrived at the Maximoff residence and busts into the house, breathlessly trying to tell Wanda it's all Heyward being a dick, but Wanda's stunned by the sudden entry and then too pissed to really listen. "The drones, the missiles, Pietro." "No, Pietro wasn't us." "All you do is lie." She's tossing Monica around with her powers.

Monica, friend, buddy, pal, was that really your plan? To barge right in and just … what? Talk fast and hope she didn't yeet your ass again? Okay, she didn't have a lot of time, I get that, but surely she could have come up with something. Like, she should have found Darcy and Vision first, and then the three of them could approach Wanda. But, no. Jimmy Woo would have a plan, Monica.

Well, fortunately for Monica she's been rewritten into Electricity Lass. She hits the ground with a staticky crackle and her eyes glow blue again. Wanda's all "bu-whu?"

"The only lies I've told are the ones you put in my mouth," Monica says all angry like. Mmmkay, I thought you were trying to help? Wanda does not care for this response. Because, no offense Monica, but the last time she heard your voice, she had a missile launched at her head.

Monica challenges her. "Do it then, take me out." Not an approach I’d go for, but it seems to work, and Wanda hesitates and Monica tries to warn her again, that unlike Wanda who isn’t actually violent and evil, Heyward will burn down Westview to get what he wants. "Don't let him make you the villain."

"Maybe I already am."

Next door, Agnes is looking out the window, watching them, with a considering look on her face. BECAUSE SHE IS IN ON WHATEVER THIS IS.

Monica is still trying to talk down Wanda. Agnes interrupts. Creepily. And shepherds Wanda away.

Vision and Darcy are thwarted in their journey again. "Oh come on! Kids? What's next? Puppies?"

Vision takes the faster way and intangibles himself out of the van and flies off, leaving Darcy at the endless intersection. "Go on! I'll just meet you there then?"

Back at Agnes's shack of creepy ladies who are freaking up to something. Where are the boys? Oh, Wanda notices the half-eaten PB&Js and the nightmarish kids' show on the telly. Behind her the bunny is in its cage. No sign of the boys. Agnes says they're probably playing in the basement.

Wanda wanders off to find them. But, there are no boys, only horror show creepiness. The basement turns into some weird sort of domed cavern with arches all around and in the middle a weird glowing rectangle.

Agnes comes up behind her. "You didn't think you were the only magical girl in town, did you?" I was wise to you, Agnes. Which, given she was a featured co-star, was probably no great insight on my part. BUT STILL!

"The name's Agatha Harkness. Lovely to finally meet you, dear." OH! LOLOLOL! OH, I didn't see that one coming. Wow, you got me, show. It never occurred to me for a second that it was Agatha Harkness.

And now a fantastic montage of Agatha doing tricksy things as Agnes through the series, with the best theme song ever "Who's been messing up everything? It's been Agatha, all along! Who's been pulling every evil string? It's been Agatha, all along. She's insidious. HA HA! So perfidious." Oh man, this is great. "And I killed Sparky, too."

LOL. Great ending.

Hey, an unexpected mid-credits scene of Monica trying to get into the house. Maybe Agnes's? Oh, yeah, she finds a storm cellar and opens the doors, to see a stone stairway with vines or roots growing all around it and zippy electrical sparks and such. Pietro appears behind her. "Snoopers gonna snoop."

Credits!

Well then.

I KNEW IT! I didn't know what I knew, but I knew I knew a thing!

#wandavision #wandavision spoilers #wandavision liveblog

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neko-shinigxmi · 5 years

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Commission for @robotarmjokes!! Based on prompt 12 from this ask meme. “Look into my eyes, what do you see?”

Commissions are still open! Check my prices [Here].

On one hand, the lighter workload was nice. Things had mostly calmed down for Atlas and whether it would be a false sense of security or a true moment of peace didn’t matter to Rhys much...or DL, honestly. A break was a break and they needed it more than anything else right now. Even if it was just a short time, some time to get her head back together would be much appreciated.

If she was gonna be honest with herself... The work she’d gotten buried in recently? Well, without a proper break, the anxiety of recent times had skyrocketed. Should she be taking breaks? Probably! But what was a little more paperwork? A little more keystrokes to finish up the most recent report... It always didn’t seem to be like such a bad thing until D found herself waking up in the morning still feeling like she’d been working overnight, anyways. That should’ve been a sign of a breakdown to come, but... Well.

D was a notoriously hard worker, after all. Even her husband would find himself hard pressed to get her to lay off... Though what else would he be doing with his free time?

When he met her for lunch, it was a pleasant day on Pandora. A rare occasion, indeed; it wasn’t considered the “murder planet” for no reason, after all! To find a day where it was quiet, the sun warm instead of blistering, and only the sound of wind? No gunshots? Lucky day! At least, Rhys was sure of the feeling, even if D seemed a little spacey, hand in hand as they walked over to a different part of Atlas that... Well, it MIGHT look like shopping mall, but-! That was totally not his intent! Don’t look at him like that!!

“...but that’s when I realized how balmy the weather was! I didn’t know Pandora could have decent temperatures,” he prattled on, completely unfazed by D’s quiet nature today. He was a rambler by nature, she liked it, and until she said otherwise, he’d keep this train a’going. “I mean, maybe I would’ve if I checked in with R&D more, but why? Aren’t they the ones who are supposed to be giving me papers? Why should I have to go down there...?” A pause. “Well, suppose it might because I have a stack of papers on my desk, but maybe emails would be better, right? What else is the ECHOnet for?!”

“Hmm,” D hummed, assuring her rambling husband he was being listened to. It wasn’t a full listen, but there was this report of a notable gang leader who’d moved into the system a few weeks ago, so if she could fill out two more sections when she got back and then have a personal recon mission to get in the loop, then perhaps--

“...though I think the craziest thing I’ve heard all day- heh- was that one of my accountants, right? Apparently, he’d been trying to siphon money from me to his own personal bank! Which... He didn’t get far, obviously. The coding nerds- that’s what I call ‘em now; we’re all friends, really- upgraded my stuff, so after a certain point, I was notified of it. Got the money back, he’s fired...but man. I don’t wanna know what’s gonna become of that guy! He’s just lucky he got fired this morning... Afternoon’s nice, so maybe he’ll get lucky? Ah, who knows... I just know we’re gonna have a delicious treat and I’ll get to see how gorgeous you’re looking today~!”

It was only when he looked over- happy, oblivious smile on his face- did Rhys realize the full extent of how out of it DL was. It was an uncommon sight to be sure...but not the first time he’d seen that blank, distantly-focused gaze of his overworked baby. Usually something was wrong elsewhere for her to work so hard... Guilt gut-punched him; did he miss something? Was she okay???

“D? DL? Baaaby??” A small noise sounded in her throat, blinking a few times before looking up at him curiously, obviously refocusing to reality. “You okay? You’re...really spaced out. Things okay? You need some time off?” That brought some light into her eyes, shaking her head quickly.

“Oh, nah! I’m alright, but... I ‘unno. Too many papers, I guess.” She shrugged rather sheepishly, prompting Rhys to give a short, soft laugh. Hey, as long as she was okay... That eased his heart a little.

“Sounds like you needed this break, then! Let me schedule a break for us both then, alright? Give you a little more time to kick back.”

“But the new bloke-!”

“-Can wait,” Rhys interrupted, looking down at D with a patient, warm smile. An attempt to comfort and assure her that the work really could wait. “You need the break, sweetheart. Let me spoil my wife a little, alright?”

...Somehow, she wanted to believe him, but had a terribly bad feeling in her gut.

------

Surprisingly, he picked the place well. Decent menu selection for something both light, yet filling, and with takeout cups so when it came time to leave, they could just waltz out with their drinks and continue the idle chatter. D had started to join in a bit more, talking about the recent resident currently being pried open for secrets...and some shenanigans with friends around the company.

“Sounds like you’ve been busy,” he hummed, pride evident in his voice. D flushed a gentle pink, shrugging.

“Ya think? I still feel like I’ve been doing a whole load of nothing... Paperwork gets done an’ all that, but I feel like I haven’t done enough. Ya know?”

“I think I do.” Rhys nodded, staring out at the walkway ahead before his gaze shifted down to his wife. “But that’s not true at all! We’ve both been doing a lot of work this past month. A break to prevent burnout is something we both need.”

“Oh, I don’t-” D’s arm lurched out, all too late remembering her cup was in hand...and it crashed to the floor, remains of her drink spilling out across the pristine white floors. Shock had her staring at the splash of color, mouth slightly open as her brain tried to catch up to the image...

“Whoops! Guess we’ll need to get someone to clean that up, huh? You want to go back and get another cup or are...you.....” Rhys turned to look at D, forgetting his voice the second he saw tears. Tears?!? What happened??? “Baby? Why are you crying? Did you get hurt?”

“Huh?” It suddenly occurred to her that, yes, her vision blurred heavily and tears were slipping down her face. The straw that broke the back of the broker...was dropping her stupid cup on the ground and spilling it. A wave of burning shame overcame her, sniffling harshly as she lowered her head and began to cry in embarrassment and stress; a bundle from the overwork she’d been going through from the past month.

“Ohhh, baby...” His voice was a soft, desperate croon, shuffling quietly for a moment before a loud thwack sound was heard, arms gently wrapping around her body seconds after. “It’s okay... It’s tough right now, I know... Cry it out, okay?” Honestly the last thing DL would’ve liked to do, but it was kinda hard to stop crying once she started. Especially after the strain all this had been...

Rhys was ever-patient, though, standing there with her and even swaying side to side comfortingly. What sounded like footsteps passed by sometimes, but they said nothing, so D pretended they weren’t there. Better to think she might have some audio issues than face the reality of actual people baring witness to this hot mess.

“Feeling a little better?” A question only asked when she was down to sniffles and rubbing the heel of her palm against her eyes instead of using his jacket. She could only really shrug, though; kinda sorta? Not entirely? Definitely felt tired, but... Better was questionable, for now.

“It’s a start,” he reassured her. “Now can we get another step done...? Can I see your pretty face~?” A shake of the head and a soft, surprised gasp. (He was being dramatic to get her to smile. Despite herself, her heart skipped a beat in hope.) “No?? But... But my pretty wife... My gorgeous baby, love of my life, light of a million stars-!” D snorted, face warming when his hand moved up, trying to slip his fingers under her chin to tilt her head up.

“Babe, c’mon... Look at me... Look into my eyes, what do you see?” DL slowly looked up at him, hesitant, but curious. Meeting those eyes... It was still hard not to blush like he was her first crush in some cheesy romance novel. How was she supposed to resist, though?! Soft brown and radiant yellow... He just was super enchanting all the time and a handsome cheat to boot because of it. (How many times did that glow of his yellow ECHO eye steal her breath away??? Too many times to count, really.)

“Um... A really intent stare?” Not her wisest answer, but all she really had with her husband being so dang distracting!! Got him to laugh, at least, face blushing a little brighter at the warm, bubbly sound.

“Well, that and lots of affection for you, D. You’re an amazing person, a hard worker, and my beloved wife. You gave so much to me and give so much to my company to boot... Just... Don’t overwork yourself for this place, okay? You help me reign back when I get too invested in stuff, so... Let me do the same for you?”

His eyes were so soft and sincere, now. Almost pleading- no, wait, definitely pleading- and even though D wanted to pull out every excuse from her book of why she should keep working ‘til her hands fell off... She sighed, instead. “Alright, ya got me... I can’t say no to that pout!”

“Yes~! I depend on it’s success and I’m glad it still works.” He laughed joyously at his little victory, giving D a quick kiss before standing back up to full height. Such a dork...but D was long used to it. Long accepted it, too! Though turning to face her earlier accident, the one that triggered this breakdown in the first spot...

“...Babe?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you really throw your cup on the ground with mine?” On the ground, two cups...the bigger of the two spills from Rhys’ cup, still clearly labeled on the side. He was silent for a moment, staring at it, then shrugged helplessly.

“I didn’t know what to do! I didn’t want to leave you to find a trash can, so I just...figured I’d do what you did. It was out of my hands and now...you’re not the only one who spilled their drink! So-!!” He was trying so hard to justify himself...and it made D laugh a little. Not feeling up to par yet, but definitely on the track to feeling better. By the way Rhys perked up, he noticed it, too.

“You’re so weird,” she mused, taking his hand.

“And yet, you married this weirdo,” he replied, beaming as they carefully stepped through the spilled drink chaos on the floor. “The weirdo who’s totally about to hear it from janitorial, but hey, worth it.” Another laugh from D, watching as he used his arm to call up said department for cleanup...and didn’t let go of her hand as they went up to the offices and towards the CEO office.

“Wait, but work-”

“No more for you today! You can finish tomorrow...or something. CEO says you get naptime on my cushy couch and then- once I do a paper or two of my own- we’ll do something nice... Think you could trust me with your stovetop?”

“Not after that incident with the fish,” D grumbled, unable to stay so grumpy when he laughed so brightly.

“You got me there! Ordering out it is, then. Put on a nice movie...” He shrugged. “I think we’re gonna get the perfect off day.” D watched him a moment longer, admiring the curve of his jaw and the tattoo on his neck. She wanted to say something like “every day with you is the perfect day off,” but maybe that was too cheesy... She’d sure think about it for the rest of the week, though.

Cause ever since she’d taken this job, it’d been nothing but worth it. Even at times like these...and all because of her dorky, CEO-of-Atlas husband.

#robotarmjokes #otp: robot arm jokes #self insert #self insert community #self ship #self ship community #self shipping #Aki Stories #Y E E T #I FINALLY FINISHED ONE OF MY COMMS......#life has been a mess #and so has my motivation so #thank you SO MUCH FOR THE PATIENCE #I have one more to do so #hopefully that'll get done tomorrow #too late to get progress done on it now #but S O O N #in the meantime yeehaw

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shysneeze · 5 years

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Facing Worries Together (Draco Malfoy x Reader)

FACING WORRIES TOGETHER

I shouldn’t be allowed to make titles oops

Request : Hi can I request a draco x reader where the reader is Nevilles twin sister and when she finds out that bellatrix is his aunt she gets scared that Bella is gonna come after her but draco does everything to make her feel better - @rochelle-the-ravenclaw

Warnings: Angsty I guess, I can’t write for shit this is so bad I’m sorry.

I knew people were going to find it weird, me dating Draco Malfoy of all people. Other people couldn't see beyond his surname, no one else had tried it would seem. It had originally taken me a while to see it too, to see his sweet side, the soft side he covers with his cold façade and his teasing.

It had actually taken me getting incredibly worked up about his teasing of my brother, Neville, and storm after him as he left potions to chip away at part of his wall. I'd finally caught up to him entering the owlery and from behind him I asked why he was doing it, all the teasing and bullying. He didn't have an answer and he'd looked like he was about to break down, so I'd let out a sigh and dragged him up the steps before sitting him down and just listening to him talk.

After that we talked more and more, growing closer much to everyone else's dismay, especially Neville's, though he trusted me enough to make my own decisions. It was just before getting on the train at the end of fourth year that we got together, when, saying goodbye to him, I worked up all my courage and pressed my lips to his, pulling back before he could process it and, embarrassed, I'd ran away before he could stop me. Neville kept asking if I was okay all the way to the station but I'd kept silent until, the next day, a large, expensive looking owl swooped in at breakfast with a letter addressed to me, from Draco Malfoy.

By the beginning of fifth year we were together and people were very confused. By now though, I thought people would be over it, but apparently not , although today I found out why.

"Is it not a little odd, with his auntie being well, you know..." Lavender hints before trailing off with a small blush hinting at her cheeks.

"Hmm?" I hum, flipping the page of my book.

"I thought you might find it a little difficult to be with him given Bellatrix Lestrange is his auntie is all." She admits and for a second I don't think I've heard her correctly.

I look up from my book with a frown and stare at her.

"What?"

Lavender's eyes widen in shock, her cheeks washing completely red now and her mouth hangs open as if she's not a clue what to say.

"Y-you didn't know?" She stutters.

I shake my head violently, feeling my heart racing in my chest.

Draco doesn't like to talk about his family past his mother and father, he likes to tell me about his mum's failed attempts at baking cookies the muggle way, or, late at night during our many meetings at the astronomy tower, how his father intimidates him, how much he hates the mark on his father's wrist and how much he wishes his family was normal. He's never once told me that his aunt happens to be Bellatrix Lestrange, the women who tortured and drove my parents mad.

"Oh my goodness, (Y/N), I'm so sorry." Lavender rambles. "I thought you know or I never would have said anything."

It's an odd feeling that washes over me, like suddenly everything is out of place and nothing seems normal for a minute. There is also that bit of anxiety that makes me feel queasy as I push myself from my seat.

"I need to uh, go." I explain to Lavender whose face is riddled with guilt. "I'll see you later."

"(Y/N)..." She starts but I've already grabbed my book and started to walk to the door.

I already feel guilty about missing mine and Draco's study date as I enter the common room. I was supposed to just have dinner and go to the library with Draco, but Lavender's revelation has left me with an anxious feeling that won't leave and I know there is someone else I need to speak to.

After climbing the stairs to the Gryffindor boy's dorm, I'm disappointed to find it empty, though ridiculously messy, beds unmade and articles of clothing strewn across the room. If I was less anxiety ridden, I'd roll my eyes, but with the heavy threat of tears I just climb straight into Neville's bed, the only one that seems to have had someone attempt to make it, and curl into a little ball.

The fear the pit of my stomach isn't completely unnecessary, I trust Draco, he's not like his family, but that doesn't mean his family will stop just because he's dating me, it means they'll have easier access to me, and to Neville.

"Uh, (Y/N)?"

I sit up quickly to see Harry and Ron, stood in the door way, frowning in concern at seeing me in my brothers bed, very clearly not dying of happiness here.

"Are you okay?"

"C-can you get Neville if he's around, please?" I say, my voice cracking slightly and Ron nods with wide eyes, grabbing Harry's arm to pull him down the stairs but Harry doesn't budge.

"Is it Draco, did he hurt you?" Harry asks and I almost smile at him.

It's no secret to me that the Gryffindor boys can be protective of me, they all just about threw a fit when Draco and I went official and though I can tell Harry's question is partly fuelled by his rivalry and growing obsession with Draco, I can still hear the genuine concern in his voice.

"No, it's not him." I say with a sniffle. "Not really,"

It's not really a lie, it's not Draco directly, just his notorious death eater of an aunt.

"Okay..." He says unconvinced. "We'll go get Neville."

"Thank you." I say as they disappear back down the stairs.

It's not long before I hear footsteps approaching again, though this time only one set and it's followed by the door swinging open to reveal Neville, eyes wide at seeing me in such a state.

"(Y/N)..." He breathes, coming forward and pulling me into his arms. "Harry and Ron said you were upset, what's wrong."

" I-I-" I start and the tears finally fall and he pulls back looking down at me.

"If it's Malfoy I swear I'll..."

I let out a shocked laugh at this, I can't help it.

"You'll what, Nev?" I ask and his cheeks redden despite his angry look. "Hit him? You know that's not in your nature."

"I'll put stinksap in his robes and the smell linger for weeks." He says angrily.

"How daring." I tease though my smile is soon replaced by another bout of tears. "It's not him."

"What happened." He asks softly, sitting back on his bed and I push myself back to sit with him.

" Bellatrix is his aunt." I mumble and I feel him tense beside me.

We sit in silence for a moment before he sighs.

"I know."

I sit up, wiping my tears on my sleeve and stare at him in shock.

"You didn't think to tell me." I ask, not hiding my irritation.

"I assumed you knew too." He defends. "Plus, I may not like him but he was making you happy."

"His aunt ruined our parents, Nev." I frown. "That's some important information."

"Well I'm sorry." He says defensively. "But what would it change if you knew?"

" A lot!"

He looks at me with a mixture of concern and confusion.

"You can forgive him for his actions through the four years you've known him and can look past his parents actions, why does Bellatrix make a difference.

Is he being serious right now, because I might hit him if he is.

"You are kidding right?" I ask. "She tortured our parents, drove them mad."

"I know that." He sighs in a pitiful attempt in defending himself.

"If I'm with Draco, she can come after us easier." I say, my voice lowering to a pathetic whisper. "I can't let that happen, I won't put you in danger like that."

He looks even more concerned now and he puts an arm around my shoulder.

"Don't worry about me, (Y/N)." He says. "Just do what makes you happy."

"Knowing you're not in danger will make me happy." I say and Neville looks unconvinced.

"It's your choice." He says. "Are you going to break up with him?"

My heart drops completely and more tears spill.

"Y-yes." I say before pressing my face into his side to hide my tears from him, knowing he has already seen them and would know anyway, on twins instinct.

"Dean heard you were sad and said you could pinch from his chocolate stash." Neville says. "You specifically, I'm not allowed any."

"Has he got chocolate frogs?" I ask pathetically through tears, it's muffled but I can feel Neville chuckle and gently get up, returning moments later with a hand full of chocolate frogs.

I know it's selfish and it's not making the situation any easier, but I've not managed to break up with Draco yet. I can't bring myself to do it and so it's become a week and a half of just avoiding him as best as possible and making terrible excuses when he asks me to go somewhere with him or talk to him. I don't want to break up with him, that's the truth of it. Over the last five months we've been together I've been so happy. The thought to breaking up with him hurts so I've avoided it.

It stops though, when Neville forces me to talk to him, fed up of finding me crying or stressing out in his dorm room. He told me to meet him in the potions classroom, which I do, although now that I'm here I see it's not just him I'm meeting. Beside him stands Draco, grey eyes wide when he sees me.

"(Y/N)..."He breathes and I can't help but look to Neville, feeling completely betrayed.

"Nev?"I squeak pathetically.

"I'm sorry (Y/N), but I'm beginning to work up a chocolate debt with Dean."He says. "Me specifically, not you- and you need to talk to him anyway."

Before I can even open my mouth to protest, Neville is fleeing from the room as Draco nods his head in a quick thanks as the door slams behind my brother.

"I uh."I begin but find myself completely lost for anything to say to Draco, being in the same room as his is making me realise how much I've missed him over the last week.

"Care to explain why you've been ignoring me all week?" He starts, I can see annoyance in his eyes and feel a surge of guilt hit me.

"I'm sorry."I say, though it comes out a whisper. "I'm so sorry."

His stormy eyes soften and he comes forward to take my hand in his own. He looks to me in concern now and I feel like I might burst into tears.

"We need to break up." I say, my voice wavering, tears edging closer to falling when he drops my hand in shock.

"What?" He asks, his voice sharp, his frown deepening.

"I think we need to break up." I repeat, holding my voice slightly more steady than last time but the guilt doesn't leave me. "I'm sorry."

"Why?" He asks, anger clear in the way he says it.

I try to think of a lie but with such little time I decide the truth is my only option.

"Lavender told me that Bellatrix Lestrange is your aunt." I admit and he tenses.

"You didn't know." He sighs, as if just realising it.

"No, I didn't." I explain.

His grey eyes meet mine as he runs a hand through his platinum hair in frustration, the angry look hasn't left his face yet.

"So you're just breaking up with me for it? You know I'm not like that."

"I know you're not, Merlin." I breathe out. "You're not anything like that I know."

"Then why?" He snaps.

"Draco, if I'm with you it gives her an easy route to Neville and I, I won't be the reason he gets hurt."

Suddenly he is looking angrier than before and I see him grit his teeth together.

"You didn't consider that I wouldn't let that happen?" He asks.

That takes me by surprise for a second because honestly, I would never expect that from him, to go against his family more than he already is by dating me and the revelation leaves me feeling kind of dazed and with even more respect for him than I already hold.

"I wouldn't like to put you in that situation either."

"Merlin's sake, (Y/N)." He lets out an exasperated breath. "I would never let anyone, not even my aunt, hurt you- or your brother, because even if we don't get on , he means so much to you."

My mouth drops open slightly and I gape at him, his words making my heart swell and I'm sure I'm holding myself back from just kissing him now.

"I will never let anyone hurt you (Y/N)." He says, softer now that he's calming down a little. "My family could never change that, because I love you so much, even the last week without you was unbearable."

I don't hold back this time, I launch myself forward and connect my lips to his, flinging my arms around his neck as he tries to stay upright after my surprise attack, then he's kissing back, hands running down my side and pulling me closer. We only pull apart for air and when his eyes reopen they're full of shock.

"I love you too." I smile, holding back tears. "I'm so sorry for ignoring you but I just panicked and I-"

"I get it, I understand, it would be a difficult thing to approach in your position." He exhales before pressing his lips to mine again, as if the experience had been so new for him that he had to do it again. "I'm sorry I never told you before, I assumed you knew, I'm sorry."

"I just don't want to get Neville hurt, or put you in a position where you'd go against your family more than you already are."

"Don't worry about me, (Y/N)." He says, pushing a strand of hair from my face and smiling.

"I'm sorry for being so selfish too, I ignored you all week because I couldn't bring myself to break up with you."I confess and he shakes his head.

"Don't worry about that." He soothes. "You need to stop worrying yourself over things you don't need to deal with alone, I'm your boyfriend, we are supposed to deal with these things together, okay?"

"Yeah." I nod, unable to rip my eyes from his and I resist the urge to lean in again.

"Next time, promise to come to me with things that worry you. I'll be here to listen, and to talk."

"I promise." I nod with a smile. "I love you."

I'm still giddy, on a high from his confession of love just minutes ago. I never believed he'd be the first to say it in our relationship, I always thought it would be me, and all of last week I believed I'd never get to say it aloud.

"I love you too." He grins, pressing his lips to mine again and I shut my eyes, allowing myself to melt into the kiss, feeling him grin against my lips as my fingers play with the hair at the nape of his neck.

He pulls back eventually and I can't figure out why until I hear the click of high heels and my heart drops.

"When your brother planned this..." Draco starts. "Do you think he planned for the situation in which Umbridge catches us?"

"Bless him, but probably not." I admit.

"Well, if we run quickly the Slytherin dorm is nearest."

"Sounds like a plan." I grin.

#this is so bad sorry #draco malfoy x reader #draco x reader #draco imagines #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy #Neville Longbottom #harry potter #draco #malfoy #hogwarts #i can't write for shit #sorry

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guessmonsta · 7 years

Note

This is going to be the weirdest ask ever- but I think you might like it! If not, you can ignore! Can you do a fairytale AU where a 'monster' (Tendou) is the outcast of a very rich, proper royal society? Everyone's always beating him down and trying to kick him out until he meets the Princess and she saves him and befriends him (The Monster probably has a huge crush on her too) Thank you!

I wanted to do so so so much with this ask but chopped it off or else it would’ve been like, 30,000 words. Somebody, please request a part two, three, four and five. I love this ask.

Solace was the only thing he’d been reaching for his entire life. Although, the back alley behind a merchant’s warehouse where he lay was anything but. The mob had left hours ago, but in the back of his mind, he could still see their faces, the knives, the torches. Over the past few years he’s managed to escape them quite well, but they got him today. The right side of his shirt had been burned, crumbling off in little ashes every time he touched it. The skin underneath wound up worse. He imagined getting stabbed would hurt less than this. It oozed of blood and he was sure the inner layer of his skin was exposed, but he couldn’t do anything about it. Another civilian had got his ankle with his sword, so it wasn’t like he could get up and ask for help. Not like anyone would help him, regardless. This man had a lot of names. The Monster, Il Diavolo, It, were just a few he was most known for, but his name was Satori. Satori Tendou, the kingdom’s notorious reject.

Satori didn’t know how he wound up being The Monster. He was human, at least, he definitely looked like one. He figured it was his red hair, or red eyes, that gave him such an image. Maybe it was because he was so scrawny, and so tall, with long limbs and droopy eyes and pale skin. Maybe he was The Monster because people were just rude to those who were different. Satori liked to think that they were the real monsters, in the end. But they weren’t, and he knew that. They were rich people, normal people, with families and friends and lived in the city. They all looked relatively the same and talked and walked and thought the same. They were basic, and that was what separated them from him.

Satori felt like he was going to end up dying here. The blood that was pooling from his ankle had finally dried up, but the evidence of how much he had lost was splayed across the concrete. There were black spots dancing in his vision, and he felt so lightheaded that he wasn’t even sure if he was breathing. All it took was a small flutter of his eyelids, and he was out.

There was a moment when Satori had woken up in the middle of the night. He could see the stars and moon above him, but as much as he tried to move, he was stuck. His eyes darted around him to see that he was, in fact, still trapped inside the back alley. He mustered up the strength to prop himself up on his elbows, groaning as he finally forced his back up against the wall. He had no clue how he was ever going to get out of here without being stopped again. He hoped that early tomorrow morning only The Judgers would be out. Satori had established that there were two types of people in this world. The Judgers, and The Harmers. The Judgers were the people who sent him dirty looks on the street, pushing their children close to their side if he so much as walked past them. They didn’t care about his existence, and he was fine with that. The Harmers were the people who wouldn’t waste a second to spit on him, or hit him with a broom. The Harmers were the people who cared so much about his existence, they wanted him dead, and it really made no sense.

Satori had noticed that, in the city, the night was so much more peaceful than the day. The forest wasn’t too far and the owls coos filled the night, frogs and crickets chirped away at will, not even for a second afraid of what might catch them. All was serene, until he heard footsteps. They were coming down the side of the back alley, the shadow of the person splayed across the brick wall. The footsteps were light, dainty even, but that didn’t stop Satori from being terrified. He had nowhere to hide, and he couldn’t even move, regardless. The person who was coming would just have to put up with him being there. He hoped that maybe they would even kill him. But what he saw wasn’t menacing, it was anything but. It was a girl in a green cloak and a black dress, holding a satchel close to her chest. She looked lost, afraid, even, and Satori almost felt pity for her.

She hadn’t quite noticed him yet as she walked down the alley. That, or she was just choosing to ignore him. She had nowhere else to go, it was a dead end, so he wondered what in the world she could possibly be doing. The chances of her not even being real were high as well. He was feeling sick and had lost a lot of blood, this could all be a trick being played by his mind. But it wasn’t.

When she finally saw him sitting there, all she did was stare. It was intense, her mouth agape and her hands shaking around the bag she held. In less than a second it was dropped, and much to his surprize, she began sprinting. Satori prepared to get a swift kick to the stomach, or maybe even a blow to his head, but when he looked up at her and saw nothing but worry in her eyes, he sat back. She didn’t want to hurt him.

She slowed to a halt and kneeled down in front of him, pulling his bony hand into hers. It was almost like she couldn’t form words, her mouth just opening and closing in shock. Satori would be lying if he said he wasn’t confused.

“This is going to sound very rude, and I’m terribly sorry, but you’re…” She rambled, taking a deep sigh in between her words. “You’re The Monster, right?”

All her could do was nod. She nodded back, sighed a quick, “thank you God”, and without warning, propped his leg up on her lap.

“I swear to God I told those buffoons to stop hurting you!” She started yelling, mostly at herself. She threw her cloak off of her shoulders and tugged at the sleeve of her dress until it ripped off. “They don’t listen to me! Is it because I’m a girl? I know I’m not the queen yet, but God! Could they pay their superior a bit of respect! Garbage! Garbage human beings!”

Satori could only watch her as she continued to scold herself, wrapping his ankle up with her torn up sleeve. If he wasn’t so delirious, he would’ve been absolutely amused.

“Who… what?” Was all Satori could manage to say. He attempted to sit up but the burn on his stomach stung when he tried to push forward. He opted to leaning back again.

“I’m sorry, this is probably really confusing.” She shook her head. She gently laid his leg back down on the ground, and grabbed his hand. “I don’t know if you know this, but you’re quite notorious around these parts. Word of you reached the palace last week and it just pissed me off! I tried to find you sooner but my father wouldn’t let me go out and look. I made an announcement to the lot to leave you the hell alone, but clearly their skulls are too thick to let my words pass through! I swear, next person to lay a land on you gets publically executed! By me!”

Satori continued to stare at her in confusion. He shook his head, and almost laughed.

“I’m sorry, miss. But who are you?”

Her face went blank for a moment, and all she could do was stare at the wall in front of her.

“I must’ve sounded like such an idiot, I’m sorry.” She chuckled, shaking her head. “My head is so inflated I assume everyone must know who I am. I’m the princess, Princess __.”

Satori was definitely stunned now. The princess, the real, royal blooded princess of this terrible kingdom, was caring about him. His heart started beating faster, his nerves going haywire. His breathing kicked up and he had to look anywhere, anywhere but those eyes boring into his. This was too much for him right now. He didn’t deserve a Deus Ex Machina. Especially, not one that was a princess.

“Why’re you doing this?” Was all he could ask. Her hand tightened around his, and Satori couldn’t help but marvel at how nice it felt. It was soft, gentle. He couldn’t remember the last time somebody had touched him to be kind.

“Well, it’s my duty as princess to make this place better off in the long run. Plus… I kind’ve taken an interest in you.”

“But why?” He asked again. “I’m The Monster.”

“You’re not a monster.” She shook her head. She was rubbing circles across his cracked skin and it nearly made him jump. “A little odd, yes, but I can relate. What’s your name? Your real name.”

“Satori.” he muttered, without hesitation.

“Satori.” she whispered back, smiling and letting her eyes fall to the floor. She was silent for a moment, thinking about something.

“I’m sorry I’m touching you so much.” She peeped, suddenly. “I’m just happy you’re alive.”

Satori pursed his lips and looked towards the ground. There was money, or something, involved with this, wasn’t there? She was the princess for God’s sake. This wasn’t a fairytale where suddenly, his shitty life was to be fixed by someone so rich and beautiful. He refused to believe this was actually happening. He wanted to ask another question, but opted to staying silent.

“Do you… do you have anywhere to go?” she asked, suddenly. She still refused to let go of his hand. It irked him just a little bit. He shook his head.

“I know it sounds intrusive, but would you like to come home with me?” Satori’s eyes widened as he shook his head furiously.

“I couldn’t, Princess. The palace is not my place.”

“Too bad, you’re coming anyways.” She smiled brightly, but Satori could see that deep down, it was fake. “We need to get your wounds covered properly before it’s too late.”

She stood up and brushed her skirt off, although it really did nothing to the state of it. She held her hand out for him to grab, but he shook his head again.

“Princess, I’ll only agree to come with you if you tell me why you’re so nervous.” He looked up at her with sharp eyes and a frown. She paused, the corners of her mouth turning downwards.

“But I’m not-”

“Are you afraid of me, princess? Is that it?” He hummed, grabbing her hand and shuffling onto his feet. His ankle almost gave out under him, but he stumbled through it. He loomed over her for a moment, his turn to look down upon her. “Are you doing this so you look like a hero? Did someone pay you? You probably can’t wait to tell all your friends about how you saved some peasant, hm? Get a pat on the back for being a good person?” Satori noticed how the frown on her face morphed into a small smirk.

“You don’t scare me, Satori, if that’s what you’re thinking.” She shrugged, stepping away from him. “And I’m not trying to turn you into my charity case either. In my defense, I’m already egotistical enough, I don’t need more people praising me. I’m doing this because I think you’re interesting. I wasn’t lying about that.”

“And why in the world would you think I’m interesting?”

__ sighed, bending over to pick her cloak off the ground.

“I’m sorry, but you have trust issues, don’t you?” She muttered, softly, looking up at him with even gentler eyes than before. He said nothing. Of course he had trust issues. He had issues in general. Everyone he had ever talked to in the past fifteen years of his life either insulted him or beat him, she out of all people should realize that.

“Please trust me, Satori. I know it would be rude to say I understand what you’re going through, but I can sympathize well enough. I think you’re interesting because you’ve gone through things I haven’t. It’s nice to live the easy life but… I always feel like I’m cheating. I’m not a real person. I’ve never had to go through any hardships. I’m just surviving, I’m not living. You do so much and have probably gone through so much… That’s why you interest me, because you’re real.”

Satori nodded slowly, not knowing if it would be okay for him to grab her hand as she did before.

“I trust you, Princess.”

She flashed him a giddy smile, and closed the space between their hands.

“Do you think you can walk up to where the palace is? I’m sorry I don’t have anything with me. I kind’ve sneaked out.��

“Princess, may I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

“Why do you apologize so much? It’s not like you’re doing anything wrong.” He inquired.

“Force of habit…” She paused for a moment, then sniffled. “I almost apologized again.”

Satori shook his head. “‘S alright.”

The silence that followed seemed odd. He couldn’t tell if it was awkward or comforting. He felt eyes watching him from windows, but the princess’ hand in his assured him. It was a long walk back to the palace, and by the time they returned, the sun was peeking up on the horizon. Walking up to such a place was intimidating, especially when the door was lined with knights. Knights who looked as if they wanted his blood.

“Good morning, Tsutomu, Eita, Wakatoshi! How are you today?” She asked them politely, and Satori couldn’t help but notice the drastic change in the tone of her voice.

“Princess, where have you been?” The knight at the far right of the line, presumably Wakatoshi, had growled. He looked absolutely angry, intimidating. Satori wouldn’t doubt it if he was told he was the strongest the kingdom had.

“Out.” She responded to his question with a fake smile.

“You snuck out? Why would you sneak out? What if you got killed or caught or kidnapped! Do the king and queen know about this?” The black haired knight was the next to go off on her, but __ didn’t seem to mind.

“They won’t know about this if you don’t tell them.” __ had continued her bantering with the two knights on the end, but the one in the middle was staring him down. His gaze was cold, his expression, colder. Satori knew it was a bad idea to follow her here. That was until the knight nodded in his direction, and began to focus on the princess.

“Princess.” The middle man interrupted the black haired knight, hitting him in the arm to do so. “Is this why you sneaked out? For The Monster?”

“I actually just wanted to find a stray cat to bring in, but he was better.” She nodded. “And in this house, we do not refer to him as such. His name is Satori.”

Satori felt awkward. There was a certain tension coming off of the middle man still, but Wakatoshi seemed to be welcoming. The other was giving him a stare of amusement and anger at the same time.

“Well, Satori, it looks like you put a fight up against somebody.” The middle man smiled. “Was it the princess who got you? Since she looks pretty beat up herself.”

He heard the princess peep a quick, “excuse me!”, but he chose to ignore it.

“Tsutomu.” Wakatoshi commanded, pointing to the other knight. “Take the princess up to her room and make sure she doesn’t get caught. Eita, bring Satori to the medic. Make sure his wounds are tended then bring him back out here. Same goes for you, Princess. We’re going to talk.”

“Yes, Father.” She mocked him, sticking out her tongue. Wakatoshi didn’t seem amused. Although Satori was ordered to go with the middle man, Eita, or whatever his name was, he stuck to __’s side. He knew he was going to be interrogated sooner or later.

“I promise you, Eita doesn’t bite. He’s just a bit of a jackass, but once you get passed that, he’s alright.” She assured him, squeezing his hand before letting it fall back down to his side.

“I heard that, Princess!” Eita sneered back at her.

“See? He isn’t going to do anything about it. He won’t hurt you.”

Satori nodded, and before she turned on her heel to follow Tsutomu down the hall, he tapped on her shoulder.

“__, I mean, Princess…”

“I prefer __, really.”

“__, thank you. For this. For everything.”

“Anything for you, Satori”

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu!! imagines #haikyuu!! scenarios #haikyuu!! headcanons #haikyuu!! matchups #tendou satori #favorite thing i've written all week 11/10 #thank you anon you blessed my life

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robertdowneyjjr · 7 years

Text

nursey the tech disaster and dex the apple support guy: an au

a conversation between me & @brandnewfashion

(interspersed with random hockey commentary)

kayytx

au where nursey keeps having IT trouble and every time he goes online to use that quick chat help service (bc he doesn't want to call. that's awkward af) he gets dex as the service guy

brandnewfashion

oooooh

nice!!!!!!!!!!!!

TELL ME MOER

kayytx

i'm trying to decide what products nursey's using that he keeps having issues lmao

i feel like fandom consensus states nursey is a mac guy?

brandnewfashion

yeah i can't see him not using them

kayytx

so basing off of my experience trying to update my software for FOUR HOURS at staying up until 3am bc of that shit ugh

the first time he has to contact apple support online he's trying to upgrade his OSX to the latest software, but it keeps stalling a quarter of the way through

so nursey borrows chowder's laptop to go on apple's website for support help and dex answers

and legit, that shit takes...four hours

brandnewfashion

lol i wouldn't know

sounds annoying tho

kayytx

it's supposed to be only half an hour but my laptop just decided to be a little shit

but anyway

in between dex telling nursey what to do, and nursey following instructions and waiting for his laptop to show some progress

they start chatting

bc nursey is bored and it's late at night and there's nothing else for him to do, especially since his computer isn't working

imagine nursey like, suddenly thinks of a few verses for a poem and types them in the chat bc he couldn't find anywhere else to write atm

and dex is like ??????

brandnewfashion

yesss

kayytx

YASSS HABS WIN

ok anyway

brandnewfashion

GOOD

kayytx

so that obvi leads to a convo where dex asks what nursey does and nursey talks about being an english major

and dex tells him about doing comp sci and working for apple part time

brandnewfashion

FINALLY THE FLAMES SCORED

and yes good i'm liking this au

kayytx

idk how many call locations there are in the US though so i'm trying to figure out where dex is based rn

like i'm kinda tempted to have him live in nyc

but i don't work for apple so idk how true this is

brandnewfashion

dude that'd be cool though? and nursey could be like "YO I'M FROM THERE" and dex, who just started school there, could be like "ok is there any place to get decent ____ bc i haven't found one yet"

kayytx

yeS EXACTLY

so nursey recommends some like hipster coffee places and one day dex remembers this convo and goes and at first he's like, what the FUCK this place serves out of mason jars NO

but he tries the coffee and he honestly thinks it's liquid cocaine so he keeps going back

brandnewfashion

lolllll

kayytx

anyway so like after three hours of chitchat and apple support nursey's computer finally boots properly and installs the update

so they say goodbye, it's been really fun talking to you, thanks for the help, etc. etc. and sign off

then three weeks later nursey's iphone spazzes out

and the nearest apple store is an hour away and he just doesn't have the time to go there, wait another hour for the genius bar to have an opening, and then go back to campus

so he goes online to apple support and clicks the chat option

and it's dex again

dex recognizes him from his apple ID, which usually never happens but bc they had such a good convo last time nursey left an impression

and so again in between helping out nursey he's just like, oh HEY i went to that place you told me about!

so nursey tells him about more places to visit

brandnewfashion

ok ben bishop is in net for the kings (no surprise) but he's wearing his lightning mask and it's really throwing me off

kayytx

god that's so weird

brandnewfashion

ANYWAY

what places does nursey tell him to go toooooo

how long does tihs go on before they get the opportunity to meet?????

kayytx

OKAY OK so

idk i think this happens like four or five times?

apple products arent THAT terrible lmao you can't have that many issues with your products

but nursey's a disaster so

he manages to fuck up something every few weeks

and like after the third time he enters the chat dex's coworkers recognize him also and they just pass him off to dex immediately hahaha

brandnewfashion

lmaooo

kayytx

oh FUCK stars tied the game

anyway

brandnewfashion

RUDE

kayytx

honestly after the fourth time nursey goes online with an issue about his ipad's storage issue or whatever dex is just really tempted to give nursey his number bc for the most part he's been able to solve his problems without referring to the resources at his desk

OH SHIT STARS IN THE LEAD

brandnewfashion

EXCUSE ME WHAT

FUCK U STARS

kayytx

UGH

anyway so yeah dex wants to give nursey his number and nursey wants to ask for it, but they both know the chats are monitored and that's just highly inappropriate and nursey doesn't want to get dex fired

so they both resist but like

it's kinda killing both of them

brandnewfashion

kayytx

yeah like they're both p sure they're gonna die before they ever meet bc they're Dramatic af

BUT!! THIS IS FIC!!! and i love them and want them to be together so DO NOT DESPAIR

nursey goes back to nyc for winter break

and he doesn't want to be all cooped up at home with nothing to do

so he decides to go out, find some inspo, write a bit

AND THEN this suddenly becomes a coffee shop au

nursey goes to that mason jar hipster cafe to get some work done

but in the middle of writing his computer shuts down and he panics REALLY LOUDLY

and what??? dex is THERE???

brandnewfashion

LOL

AMAZING

HOW CONVENIENT

kayytx

R I G H T

he had the day off and was also there to work on some freelance coding projects he has on the side and in the middle of coding he hears this really loud person screaming at his laptop and he's like, what the FUCK

so he looks up and sees nursey doing SOMETHING with his computer. he's not even sure what

and in teh cafe there are like three other people with their laptops out, but dex is the closest and he looks the least busy (nursey is wrong. dex is the busiest, he just looked up at the wrong time and Eye Contact happened and now he's stuck)

so nursey goes over to him and he's like, "yo bro can i borrow your laptop to go on apple support and get some help"

bc that response is just like ingrained in him now. anytime something happens he just. goes on apple support

dex, being the lil shit he is, just goes, "have u tried turning ur computer off and on again"

brandnewfashion

kayytx

nursey: it won't even turn ON dex: maybe its out of battery nursey: it's plugged in??? do u not see it????? dex: maybe your cord doesn't work

dex just. doesn't want to help

he does enough of that at work

brandnewfashion

lollll

kayytx

but nursey is really annoying and he figures the easiest way to get rid of him is to help him so he's like, ok fine i actually work at apple i'll help you

brandnewfashion

wow

the pens are gonna lose

to the STARS

kayytx

.....that's so depressing

brandnewfashion

they got too fucking cocky

ugh

kayytx

brandnewfashion

anyway

dex helps him?

kayytx

dex helps him!

and meanwhile nursey's chattering on and on about how this is the first time someone's actually physically helped him with his laptop bc he never goes to the genius bar even though he probably should and he's terrible with technology and things always just die on him so he always has to get help from online support and it's kinda funny how he always gets the same guy who helps with his problems and it's actually kinda nice talking to him, and he kinda really likes him, but he doesn't think they'll ever meet bc why would that ever happen right? hey maybe dex would know him since they're both working for apple? but what are the chances?? surely there are thousands of people who work for apple

and like all this time dex has sorta just been tuning him out while he works on nursey's computer but he catches a few things here and there

and he's like

wait

rewind

dex: holy shit nursey: what? what is it, is my computer really dead this time? dex: you're derek nurse nursey: umm? yes?

and for a sec nursey thinks that he's just somehow become notorious within apple support center circles or something bc he's gone for help so many times

but then dex introduces himself and he's like OH HOLY SHIT

brandnewfashion

NICE

kayytx

and like sometime during nursey's little ramble he mentioned how he thought dex is funny and really nice and seems like someone he'd like to date and of COURSE dex totally heard all of that

dex: so. you think i'm funny. and you want to date me huh? nursey: ...well i mean maybe? dex: okay well just do you know just because we're both in a coffee shop right now declaring our feelings this ISN'T our first date okay bc i refuse to have our first date be one where i fix something for you again nursey: oh so YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME TOO?

brandnewfashion

kayytx

dex: well yeah. i wanted to give you my number but i couldn't do that without a monitored chatroom nursey: i wanted to give you my number too! dex: well? technically? i have your number? because it's in our systems dex: but i didn't want to seem like a creep if i'd just randomly texted you

but anyway they finally exchange numbers like normal people and nursey Officially asks dex out on a date

but then internally he's struggling bc he basically already gave dex a list of all the best places in nyc and now he has nothing to impress dex with lmfao

brandnewfashion

HAHAHAHA

kayytx

they end up going to brooklyn for smorgasburg bc you cant really ever go wrong with that

wait jk that's seasonal so it wouldn't be open for winter break LMAO

brandnewfashion

oh gosh they're gonna become a disgustingly sweet long distance couple

kayytx

yeah nursey's fucked

YES THEY ARE

they're so gross honestly

brandnewfashion

they always have shit going on

there's ALWAYS something hapening haha

kayytx

and dex's coworkers notice that this dude hasn't been on the chat in a really long time??? and they kinda start feeling bad for dex bc they knew he had a bit of a crush on nursey lmao

brandnewfashion

ok but then dex has them all over to meet his "new boyfriend" and they all walk in on nursey screaming at his laptop and they're like "OH"

kayytx

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and at this point dex is already at the fondly exasperated stage and he's like, jfc nurse you should just give up on technology altogether

#nurseydex #dexnursey #omgcp #omgcheckplease #check please #i love this pairing with my whole life #brandnewfashion #kay writes things #honestly i should just start a new tag #kay has ideas #bc i have ideas but i never actually write the fic lmfao #anyway

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