#AND APPARENTLY ANOTHER SEASON ISNT CONFIRMED YET???

[vanlagoon]

My friend made me watch Good Omens. Good Omens has started appearing on all of my social media feeds.

Send help.

#i love my friends but please #good omens #AND APPARENTLY ANOTHER SEASON ISNT CONFIRMED YET??? #someone save me #amazon has enough money #i need another season

[katarinas-redemption]

S1E22 - Liz: Tom told me something right before he died. Red: What was that? Liz: “Your father’s alive.” James Spader: That was the intention with the line….that you could interpret it either way. That you could interpret it as being the truth or you could interpret it as being figurative.

Tom said that Liz's father is still alive, but Red insists he's dead. Is Red part of a cover up or does Red really think he's dead?

Jon Bokenkamp: What I do not believe is that Red is lying to Liz. The things he's told her about her father he believes to be true and thus are true, but that doesn't necessarily mean those in the writers' room believe them to be true. It's safe to believe that what he told her on the steps was the truth so far as he knows.

Red is covered in burn scars, so clearly he was in that same fire that apparently claimed the life of Liz's father. Could he be related to her in some other way?

Jon Bokenkamp: It's safe to say that he is connected to her past in some deeply emotional way. Either that, or maybe he was a firefighter in another life. [Laughs] They both have an understanding of [the mythology between them], but don't really have the whole picture.

John Eisendrath Acknowledged that at the end of The Blacklist’s season finale, Red (James Spader) turned around and we saw the burn scars. But that was not meant to confirm to the viewers that he is Elizabeth Keen’s father. Instead, Eisendrath said, “It tells us that there’s a story yet to come about what the truth is, about whether or not he is her father. And this season we’re going to take the opportunity to ask and answer that question in ways that I think will get us closer to the ultimate truth. He also noted that the mythology of the show is "very small." It’s just about the relationship between the two of them. It’s a "very relatable story." There isnt a larger story about why he picked her or why he came back. So it is a challenge to know when to introduce the next surprise in that story.

Season 1 Berlin Conclusion Commentary with: [Jon Bokenkamp, John Eisdendrath, Joe Carnahan]

42:48 - JC: And this is also an image that we had long ago. Right. The burns. In the ninth episode, we had thought of using this as the end of the episode. A cliff hanger, for the midseason cliff hanger. And we saved it for here, and I think it was a very powerful way to end. Well it becomes, that’s the, it is her father, which is really what you want the punctuation, you want to be on the end of the season is, JB: Or? Is he? JC: Or, is he?

About halfway through the first season, Red tells Liz that he’ll never lie to her, and I was thinking about that line watching the finale, where Liz says that Tom told her that her father is still alive and Red says, “No, that man died in the fire.” And I wondered: Is he speaking figuratively—saying he’s physically still alive, but that guy that he was back then is dead?

James Spader: That was the intention with the line….that you could interpret it either way. That you could interpret it as being the truth or you could interpret it as being figurative.

In the Season 1 finale, we saw the burn scars on Red, after we had heard that Liz’s father rushed into a fire to rescue her. What can we expect from that part of the story, this season?

James Spader: We are shooting Episode 4, right now, in the second season, and that story has not been extrapolated on. That is just percolating for a little bit. The other thing to remember is that Elizabeth Keen has spoken of a memory of being in a fire when she was a child and somebody pulling her out of that fire. She may be assuming that it was her father, but we’ve never said whether it was her father or not.

They were open to change. Or, the show could go in any direction.

(That said, they've only ever had one story in mind since the inception. Redarina. See the post on the Redarina subreddit about Jon always knowing the endgame for the interview excerpts.)

Jon had told the press in early S1 that he had a desired endgame in mind but wasn't sure if NBC would let him do it.

Do you already have an endgame for the Blacklist?

Jon Bokenkamp: Yes. Not sure if Sony or NBC will let me do it, but yes.

Do you know the ultimate answer to that or has it changed as the show has evolved?

Jon Bokenkamp: I definitely have one particular thing in mind and I've shared that with James and [executive producers] John Eisendrath and John Fox. We have a solid landscape that we're working in. That said, James has said before: When you're hoping for something to be on air for years, you really have to be open to change and open to listening to the story. I would be lying if I said we have absolutely everything figured out because that's part of the joy of it.

Did you know you were making a hit when you were working on this?

Jon Bokenkamp: No! I really just love the character of Red and the larger mystery at the core of this. That’s what drew me to it. And now it is fun to look at all the different angles the show can go.

Jon Bokenkamp: I remember talking with James, it was probably right after we shot the pilot, and we were talking about what the show would be, how it would look and feel, and who this character was. The thing that has always stuck with me is that when James read the pilot, he had said that he felt like, at the end of the episode, it’s almost like he knew less about the character than he knew when he started reading the episode.

Jon Bokenkamp: The ending has always been our guiding light. I sat down with James in his backyard. I'll never forget it. I was terrified. After we shot the pilot, He wanted to talk about "where this is going". And I said, well, I have an idea, and I'll tell you what I think it is… Because we could just be completely winging it. You know, I mean that's what happens oftentimes. But I said as a movie guy, I have to know the ending. You can't just. you can't… fake it. You know? You gotta kinda know where you're going. And I pitched him the ending. And in classic Spader sort of that laugh, and the hand rub, and OMG, he was like… alright, "I'm in". You know? and, uh, if he had said no, that would've been terrifying.

What’s required to keep a show going for that long?

James Spader: As many twists and turns as one can provide. When I first read the script, at the end I realized I knew less about the character than when I first started reading. And I thought, “What a great trick that is” — to retain a certain enigmatic aspect. It felt like the premise was perfectly suited to go in any direction and somehow find its way back on track again.

So what was it about this material that grabbed you?

James Spader: - But also, I was really drawn to the fact that I knew nothing about what direction it could go in and what direction this character might go. I knew less after I finished reading the pilot than I did at the beginning of it. And I thought, Fantastic, because to sustain it over a number of seasons, it’s nice to be surprised and keep discovering things

#the blacklist

[hiemalstar]

alice in borderland theory; still in borderland?

introduction

hey tumblr, im back w another analyzation of alice in borderland; once again, still the netflix series. i do not own the manga. yet. todays analyzation is about a pretty popular topic right now; are the 'former' players still in borderland? lets take a look. 

still in borderland - evidence supporting claim

during season two, arisu and the others played face card games. along the way, they find out ‘citizens’, or, long term participants of borderland who now run games, are a part of the mystery of borderland. they mostly refuse to say anything, mostly speaking along the lines of “clear all the games, and you will find out.” it lacks information, but its still straight forward. this happens continuously leading up to the final face card game- or, at least we think it's the final game. out of face card games? yes. out of the eternity of games? no. lets talk about it.

‘final’ game during the final face card, or, queen of hearts/croquet, mira plays mind games on arisu and usagi. she is fully capable of manipulating them and creating false imagery, as she fools them multiple times as they drink tea. once she is beaten, the fireworks from episode one flash in the sky, and the remaining players are sent home. but that’s where we are wrong. they are specifically asked whether they would like to leave or not. borderland still exists, despite all the games having been completed.  circulating back to mira, i already mentioned she can play very elaborate and believable mind tricks. whats stopping us from thinking this isnt another one of her tricks? not much.

everyone is connected  when players confirm they would like to leave borderland, it cuts to an altered version of episode one. karube, chota, and arisu walking through shibuya, camera switching between different characters that were introduced in borderland. its ‘revealed’ that they were actually all in the same place at the same time, and a meteor had actually crashed right there at that exact moment.  at least, that’s what they want us to think.  “but hiemal, what do you mean??” if you go back to episode one with the original version of the shibuya street clip, you cannot find anyone from borderlands. this is excluding usagi being faintly seen in the background before the crosswalk clip. even with usagi being visible, this lacks the evidence it needs to support the idea that everyone was there at the same time. 

and finally, outside the hospital, we can see a bunch of playing cards sprawled out on a table. slowly, they all blow away. except for one. the joker card. now in my personal opinion, i believe the joker might symbolize a trick as joker cards were originally symbolized as a kings fool/trickster. if the joker card symbolizes a trick, it all lines up with the idea that they didn't actually escape borderland; while they might've beat the queen of hearts, the joker is still apparent/relevant. if my theory is correct, what will this joker game be? i cant say for certain. 

bonus: what was the purpose of asking whether or not players would like to stay or not? to start this off, in season one, when it cuts to recordings of momoka and her friend, we find out that players can definitely help with the games. sound familiar? citizens. arisu says he believes the citizens had been there so long, they started to create the games themselves. he might be onto something. what if, this choice between staying or leaving is actually to replace the face cards’ former queens/kings?    all of the face cards leading citizens have left. assuming that borderland has existed for longer than we think, taking into consideration that a lot of people came at entirely different times supports this. new leaders take the place of the old, and those who choose to go home move on to play the joker. 

conclusion

thats all for today. what do you guys think, and did i miss anything? if you have anything youd like me to cover, please do tell me and ill consider it. id love to hear your guys thoughts if you have any. until next time <3

#aib #alice in borderland #theory #opinions #opinion #show theories

[deripmaver]

laurent is a good person - book 1 meta

one of the most amazing things about captive prince is how the reveals in book 3 recontextualize all of the scenes leading up to them, including about laurent himself. in book one, all we see is damen pov as he’s being abused and humiliated by this supposedly spoiled, vile ice prince. when the regent comes to damen and subtly (and not so subtly) insults laurent, calling him unfit to rule - well, why would he think anything different? laurent has insulted him, had him whipped within an inch of his life, and even attempted to (and later successfully lmfao) have him raped while drugged out of his mind. 

after book 3 we can reread most if not all of book 1 as a very traumatized boy who has finally been confronted with the man who killed his brother, leaving him alone with his abusive uncle, and who he clearly has made into a complete monster in his own mind. damen of course sees him as a complete bitch, but there’s textual/subtextual evidence that laurent is well liked, and that his behavior during book 1 was actually pretty out of character for him. i’d like to provide some examples of that now!!!!

“Laurent had stopped dead the moment he had seen Damen, his face turning white as though in reaction to a slap, or an insult. Damen’s view, half-truncated by the short chain at this neck, had been enough to see that. But Laurent’s expression had shuttered quickly.” Captive Prince, Chapter One

i couldn’t resist adding this one in hehe. laurent recognizes damen!! he’s come down, knowing his uncle has devised another truly horrendous and triggering “gift” and that he’ll lose support if he calls it our for what it truly is, only to find out that it’s fucking damianos of akielos sent to him as a sex slave. a jab at laurent’s trauma about auguste and also a jab at laurent’s frigid sexuality - which ofc is completely the regent’s fault. fuck that guy so much lmfao 

“‘It’s so rare to see you at these entertainments, Your Highness,’ said Vannes.” Captive Prince, Chapter Two.

this is right before the fight between govart and damen in the ring, of course. damen sees laurent as depraved and vile as the sexual sadism on display by the veretian court, and considers him to be a willing purveyor of it. this is wrong, of course, as said by vannes here. laurent has only shown up because he wants to humiliate damen lmfao.

“He did remember being supported by two of the guards, here, in this room, while Radel stared athis back in horror. ‘The Prince really . . . did this.’ ‘Who else?’ Damen said. Radel had stepped forward, and slapped Damen across the face; it was a hard slap, and the man wore three rings on each finger. ‘What did you do to him?’ Radel demanded.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

this scene, to me, was the most telling lmfao. it’s right after damen is whipped. you could argue that radel is just a servant in the employ of the royal household, so is of course going to be loyal to the prince, but he seems genuinely surprised of the prince’s cruelty towards damen. not only that, but he slaps him and immediately assumes damen must have done something. which - i mean, technically he did lmao. not necessarily enough to deserve having the skin flayed from his back, but you know. if laurent was in the habit of torturing pets and slaves, why would the overseer react this way?

“The men guarding him were the Prince’s Guard, and had no affiliation with the Regent whatsoever. It surprised Damen how loyal they were to their Prince, and how diligent in his service, airing none of the grudges and complaints that he might have expected, considering Laurent’s noxious personality. Laurent’s feud with his uncle they took up wholeheartedly; there were deep schisms and rivalries between the Prince’s Guard and the Regent’s Guard, apparently.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

laurents relationships with his guards are also some of the biggest indicators that he isn’t just a spoiled brat, but can insire a deep loyalty in his men. even if they do all want to fuck him. ah, sexual harassment. it’s also hilarious that damen immediately assumes they’re loyal to him because they want to fuck him - nice projection there, dude. we know a bit more about laurent and his guards thanks to green but for a season, but this little bit here is interesting.

“Laurent was indeed good at talking. He accepted sympathy gracefully. He put his position rationally. He stopped the flow of talk when it became dangerously critical of his uncle. He said nothing that could be taken as an open slight on the Regency. Yet no one who talked to him could have any doubt that his uncle was behaving at best misguidedly and at worst treasonously.”  Captive Prince, Chapter Five

idek what to say here. laurent my beloved <3333

“‘When someone doesn’t like you very much, it isn’t a good idea to let them know that you care about something,’ said Laurent. Damen felt himself turn ashen, as the threat sank in. ‘Would it hurt worse than a lashing for me to cut down someone you care for?’ said Laurent.” Captive Prince, Chapter Seven

this isn’t really relevant to my thesis lmfao i just love this exchange bc it gives SO MUCH information about laurent and his uncle in just three lines of dialogue. what has the regent done, who did he cut down just to hurt laurent? when and how did laurent learn that? p a i n 

“Laurent’s fussy horse began acting out again, and he leaned forward in the saddle, murmuring something as he stroked her neck in an uncharacteristically gentle gesture to quiet her.” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine. 

HORSEY NO- lmfao this scene just hurts so badly on the reread. especially later on, in book 3 i think, where laurent says something like “i provoked my uncle.” he’s really blaming himself for his uncle KILLING HIS HORSE, his horse that his murdered brother trained, one of the only living connections to auguste... all because his uncle could not let a single miniscule plan laurent had set go through without some kind of repercussion. literally all laurent did was do something to stop an innocent group of people from being abused, nothing to undermine his uncle’s rule, but because the regent is VILE he could not let laurent have even this. he’s so good with her, too. he must have known by this point and also known that there was no way to stop this. P A I N

“‘I know that you have somehow arranged this,’ said Erasmus. He was incapable of hiding what he felt, and just seemed to radiate embarrassed happiness. ‘You kept your promise. You and your master. I told you he was kind,’ Erasmus said. ‘You did,’ said Damen. He was pleased to see Erasmus happy. Whatever Erasmus believed about Laurent, Damen wasn’t going to dissuade him. ‘He’s even nicer in person. Did you know he came and talked to me?’ said Erasmus. ‘—He did?’ said Damen. It was something he couldn’t imagine. ‘He asked about . . . what happened in the gardens. Then he warned me. About last night.’ ‘He warned you,’ said Damen. ‘He said that Nicaise would make me perform before the court and it would be awful, but that if I was brave, something good might come at the end of it.’ Erasmus looked up at Damen curiously. ‘Why do you look surprised?’ ‘I don’t know. I shouldn’t be. He likes to plan things in advance,’ said Damen.” Captive Prince, Chapter 9.

this is the first in-text confirmation we have that laurent has a good heart beneath his layers and layers of trauma-induced lashing out. book one often skeeves people out because of its graphic and, honestly, yes, kind of sexualized depiction of rape, slavery, and depravity, but beneath it all you meet these two protagonists who are going to have all of their most deeply held views about each other challenged. laurent from very early on is shaken to his core when damen refuses to rape nicaise in the ring - it cracks the very foundations of the person he’d built up in his head as this horrible monster who killed his brother in cold blood. and damen keeps defying laurents expectations by being a good person through and through. on the other hand, laurent spends the first part of the book taking out years of anger on damen, but here for the first time we see him do something just because its the kind thing to do. yes, torveld is an ally against his uncle, but laurent has clearly been scheming with him for a while now, and he’s now overlooking his hatred of damen and working with him just because none of the slaves deserve whats happened to them. it’s such a sweet moment.

“One of the other men, eyeing them, approached a moment later. ‘Don’t mind Jean. He’s in a foul mood. He was the one had to stick a sword through the mare’s throat and put her down. The Prince tore strips off him for not doing it fast enough.’” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine.

HORSEY NO- pt 2. this is just another really sweet and sad detail - laurent being so upset that the horse’s death could have been more painless. it must have hurt so much to see her in pain, and to know that the only way for that pain to end was being put down as quickly as possible. i wuv him. im sad

that’s it, though there are still a few more chapters left in the book. this isn’t providing any new information, of course, the path of the three books is to show that laurent isnt the man we meet in book one, that he’s actually sweet, and earnest, and he’s been fighting his own battle practically alone against his abuser since he was fifteen years old. also, the reveal that laurent knew who damianos was from the start makes it clear imo that all of his violence in book 1 was supposed vengence, not... him being evil. he apologizes explicitly in-text, and also, all of the acts of violence he commits cause serious problems for him in terms of his future alliance which he then needs to fix. i just love how layered these books are, how there’s so much information in them that makes rereading almost more fun than reading them for the very first time!

#Captive Prince #captive prince meta #damen x laurent #Laurent of Vere #Damianos of Akielos

[dennishater69]

bro i been thinking abt that (the one up there that one great post big fan) post theorizing that dennis is meant to be a twist on the “jim halpert” kind of a leading man thats standard on sitcoms. and how all the characters are like that yanno? historically successful, funny, and loved tv tropes put into an unforgiving and realistic world? like it’s even funnier when you think about how it’s almost as if the gang (ESP Den) /knows/ that they should be getting rewarded for all their antics and scheming. that’s what happens on tv. on tv jim knew from day one that he was the man for pam, he /knew/ he’d get her and (so) he /did/! he didn’t even have to try!! but in philly dennis “knows” that he’s the man for (caylee, mac, literally anyone) but it comes off as creepy not charming thus hes often rejected and humiliated.

dee is the female voice of reason (yeah ik the origin of kaitlins dee shut up let me talk), and yet her schemes and beliefs are just as titled as the boys. now look at this: lisa simpsons job wasnt to actually convince her dad or brother that their idea was dangerous. lisa’s job was to call attention to just how fucking stupid the male leads r. plus she’s a chick and implicit lesbo so she doubles as a punching bag. just like dee. cept dee isn’t super smart or musically inclined, the only thing she really has going for her is the gang. and the fact that she’s probably the best off in terms of not destroying her own life. which lets her have this unearned sense of superiority similar to dennis’ because she ~knows~ that she’s the voice of reason. what she doesn’t know is why even after she’s proven that that’s not who she WANTS to be anymore the guys still refuse to treat her like a real member of the gang even though she so obviously is. even tho the guys know she’s just as good (bad) as they are. lisa simpson, the chick from seinfeld, and lois griffin are all fine and good and are funny because deep down lois CHOSE to marry peter, lisa explicitly LOVES her family DESPITE their flaws. but dee is UNLOVED. there’s no point in her being there other than to contradict, not cos she necessarily wants to but the gang actively avoids giving her attention for anything else. so now you’ve got the voice of reason trope desperately trying to prove their own unreasonableness in an attempt to be liked. the boys resist. she acts up. they give her enough of a nod for her to stay for another drink. meanwhile the gang is getting into increasingly stupid and dangerous schemes because the voice of reason prefers not being shit on. almost like how a real person would react to being forced into that position. huh.

charlie and mac r sort of make up one; they’re the gang (ik ik) they’re dennis’ gang. the chandler and the other one. the “leading mans” sidekicks who are happy to go along with whatever plan, happy to let him get the girl, happy to remind him of how perfect he is when he’s down. (which obviously mac and charlie are NOT happy about ANY of that and HATE that dennis treats them like they are.) It’s also maybe important to note that usually the “leader” of the group is the one who brought the three friends together. dennis just crashed mac and charlie’s twosome one day and never left. mac and charlie support dennis but only out of annoyance or in macs case sometimes something deeper. either way, it’s out of trope. really they shouldn’t be able to function without dennis telling them how to. but at this point it seems like they’re better off without him around.

but charlie is also his own trope. Cause the thing is…charlie works as a lovable goofball, the slob with a heart of gold, socially awkward sure but deep down he wouldn’t hurt a fly. except. he would hurt a fly. he is a self-proclaimed “rat-basher”, hes the only character to explicitly say the n word, he stalks and assaults the waitress (her trope is p obvious. perfect girl that the loser drools over, she rejects him.) to the point of her actually breaking and agreeing to HAVE HIS KID (need a whole new post abt those beans jfc)

NOW. i ask you…what usually happens in tv shows with the charlie/waitress dynamic? typically i’d say that throughout the course of the show the audience realizes that the supposed “perfect girl” is actually a bitch and that it’s actually the unassuming, more natural looking, lead girl who should get together with the charlie character. depending on the show, maybe she’s the girl who’s been helping him chase his supposed dream girl. or she’s the girl who is, up until the big reveal, his lesbian-coded best friend who is SICK of hearing about this girl. or maybe shes just always been there, but he’s never considered her because they’ve been friends for so long, they’ve known each other since they were kids, maybe she isnt even on the table and she’s dating his friend, or she was dating his friend, or maybe…because she’s the sister of his friend. his friends TWIN sister. see where i’m going with this? it’s dee. dee and charlie are the b couple. the dwight and angela. they’re the obvious couple.maybe you didn’t see it at first but once it’s suggested you can’t unsee it. and when they DO get together. it’s like they always were. they’re the caring, devoted, consistent couple that the audience can lean on when things get messy in the other characters relationships. and yet. dee and charlie already DID get together. and apparently they hated it. hated it so much that charlie (the poor guy trope) wanted to stop and dee (girl next door trope) FORCES him to finish. not to mention neither of them seem all that interested in a caring consistent relationship. at least not with each other. why would they be?

and what would a B couple be without an A couple? but how do you even go about satirizing an A couple? they’re meant to stay in a “will they won’t they” for at least five seasons, and when they inevitably do get together it’s full of cheating and lying and breaks. cause thats what makes an A couple interesting to watch. they’re “meant to be” and yet still have to work through the issues that all relationships face. and if it’s a sitcom this is usually funny because all the audience and characters have ever wanted was for the A couple to be official, but now that they are there’s somehow even MORE conflict within the show. sound like anyone? macdennis. but dennis (leading man) wasn’t prepared for a SECOND leading MAN. no one ever told him he was going to be expected to share the limelight. he assumed he’d meet his girl and he would know and so would she and then she’d happily stand behind him forever. not next to him. she certainly wouldn’t ever try and step IN FRONT OF DENNIS. like mac does. now remember that none of the characters, except possibly dee, know that they are filling out a trope. but dennis is the golden god. of course he knows. and that is why he is or was or whatever actively ensuring that he and mac would never be together in a way that could potentially over shadow denniss “guaranteed” leading lady, and more importantly dennis. and even more important. leading men. are not. and have never. been gay. (debatable but i digress)

so a couple b couple who cares? i cares. cause taylor swift doesn’t rape the guy at the end of “You Belong With Me”. b couples exist as a more palatable A couple. meant to be without the drama. so this is extremely out of trope for chardee. yk what ELSE is out of trope? macs coming out. yeah we’ve all touched on how fucked that must’ve felt from dens pov but here’s the thing. by coming out, mac was able to confirm that the A couple, in fact, WILL. and most likely already HAVE. but he did this alone. he and dennis didn’t come out together, mac doesn’t think about dennis at all in find his pride, mac being gay is his. and that leaves dennis with…the knowledge that he and mac ARE the A couple. not only that, but apparently mac can satisfy that trope all by himself. macs outness is obnoxious. it’s like he’s bragging about it. showing it off. it’s how everything was, but. worse. he doesn’t even need anyone to do the annoying A couple stuff, the parade around, the delusion that no one could have possibly known. he doesn’t need dennis. but it’s pretty clear that at least some part of mac still WANTS dennis. and was expecting dennis to too. but that’s not real life. imagine you’re in a “will they won’t they” for DECADES and then, out of nowhere, ur partner says “yeah no we will.” and everyone believes them. they don’t even need to spare a glance at you because they’ve always kinda known and now thanks to “your other half” they always will know for sure. no matter what you do. now there’s an expectation.

and (full circle u guys) dennis’ trope doesn’t usually call for meeting expectations. he’s attractive and charming, he’s supposed to be able to coast until he looks up and realizes he gs everything he ever wanted. but now he’s 44. and he has everything he never wanted. his abusive (not)father is best friends and the father of? HIS highschool best friend, his other best friend is an asshole who is somehow an asshole abt: being gay, dennis being gay, being gay for dennis, dennis not validating that when he expected him to. and his sister, who has been firmly planted against him since they were kids. hes starving and he’s a legit alcoholic, the gross kind, and all he’s ever done is get a diagnosis that makes his friends treat him weird and abandon his son who is named after a stranger to everyone. and i’ll prolly make a king post abt it but dennis has been showing subtle signs of edging towards (another) extreme breaking point and idk what it’s abt (fingers crossed mac uwu ihatemyself )but i’m just saying that dennis’ mentality has kind of always directed the group in a direct way (whether dynamics, psyche, finances, lives, time, etc) so that’s innerestin

and so now i say the most cracked out part of the post. this theory is giving me untapped amounts of hope that the only way the show can end is with the gang finally settling and finding happiness or they all commit group suicide. and idk abt u but those are the only two endings i’m interested in seeing.

#this is illegible #mostly chardee macdennis brain rot #i anyone wants i can repost this in like a coherent way #i don’t want u to know me like that but script analysis is kinda my forte and despite what it looks like i’m really good at explaining #this just isn’t explaining so much as #me thinking out loud #also ik i didn’t give mac his own trope i haven’t thought about it a lot but i’m sure i could find one for him #frank too #i excluded frank #cause i’m going off of like season one?? if that makes sense? like day one stuff but maybe i’ll think abt frank later #skornk #dennis reynolds #iasip #it's always sunny in philadelphia #dee #macden #chardee #charlie kelly #dee reynolds #mac mcdonald #someone tell me how to make it so it doesn’t show up so long like so it’s underneath and i’ll do that #sorry

[alarrylarrie]

Yes I am excited for next season bc *without giving much spoiler* is the one that feels more like a fairytale lol Benedict storyline is really good! but also I wanna see Kate and Anthony love a bit in it since the ending seemed a bit rushed.. they are gonna be in both season 3 and 4 since Anthony is still the Bridgerton heir and Viscount lol not like Daphne that moved away and only comes once in a while so we should see Kate and Anthony way more. Now that I think about it I dont know if they are doing the books by order after this season since it isnt confirmed what storyline is coming yet (it should be Benedict's if in book order) but I do know Jonathan Bailey signed until season 4 so more Anthony for sure.

I was just reading an article about this! According to the show runner, they might not go in order, so we might skip Benedict and (redacted bc spoilers) lol apparently and go with another Bridgerton? Especially because Benedict’s saga takes place over two years. I guess we’ll see though!

Can I say that in my humble opinion I find it so fascinating how Luke Thompson plays Benedict? Like…. If there was ever to be a queer coded character… it would be him (and Eloise too, Theo be damned lol)

I am glad to see more of Jonathan Bailey and Simone Ashley, I do think their ending was a little rushed with all of the other loose ends to tie up.

I’m cool if they skip Benedict but I would NOT be okay if they did a season on Colin. I’m still SO MAD at him for this last season. He was probably one of my faves? Like the Marina stuff gutted me, but then he was just cruel about Pen. Also don’t even get me started on that… a fatphobic storyline for a Regency-esque period piece??? Make it make sense, Shonda.

#bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton #spoilers #jonathan bailey #Simone Ashley #Luke Thompson #lol can you tell I’m passionate about this show AND have no friends??? #😆😆😆

[fart-gate]

SG1

Season 3 episode 5

"LEARNING CURVE"

notes by me

- oh my god??? Daniel being cute with kids and teaching them how to do archeology stuff?? Thats it I'm good I dont need to see the rest of the episode

- bandana!Daniel

- ooo a naquada reactor

- tealc staying as daniels bodyguard ❤

- the little kid knows everything about the reactor and the older dude doesn't? Is he just not a scientist or is it more sinister

- Jack avoiding the How Old Are You question

- why are there oNLY children helping them. I have yet to see another adult except for that one guy

- sams smug face when the girl says jacks dumb

- you know this kids right. Where are they gonna find another goauld larva for tealcs womb

- these people are from a long lost civilization hey thats cool

- theres trinium in her blood? Isnt that some sort of metal

- tiny robots!!!! Never a good sign!!!

- this girl is a good actor

- *draws stick figure* "its a picture of me!"

- again, I could watch Daniel do archeology stuff all day #dreamy

- dont mess with tealc when the wellbeing of a child is involved 😤

- Sam : is asleep facedown on her desk

Jack: "...major...caRTER"

Sam:

- this guy made his son revert back to baby brain and does not care in the slightest

- how do you not know how to physically teach someone something.

- "shes going back to get her brain sucked out!"

Hes not wrong

- Jack is set and ready with the adoption papers pen in hand

- "tealc do you see any danger to dr Jackson if he stays?"

Bodyguard!tealc confirmed

- I dont give a shit what this guy says. You dont treat kids like this

- " i didnt start experiencing great things until I was 15!"

"Like what things?"

"Oh u know.....stuff"

What stuff Sam tell me

- ✨reverse the polarity trope✨

- "what about the affect its having on Merin?"

Jack pouring the tea

- "you dont deserve them!" THATS RIGHT GO OFF JACK

- we now have a working naquada reactor for the sgc 👍

- Jack what ur doing is HIGHLY illegal !

- !!!! ILLEGAL!!!

- "colonel jack!!" These kids know Jack oh my god does he go visit this school on his days off. reason #1338281 he is perfect

- cassies old school apparently

- *child paints a crude picture of jack*

"I look fat"

- love how the most important lesson he could have taught her was art 💗

- a gift of crayons

- this is fucked up

- Jack got lucky with not being punished

- there was nothing they could do I guess

- when Daniel has his shirt hanging off his shoulders a bit he looks gnc af

- wow look at that. She gave them all personalities

- awww theyre teaching them now GOOD no longer idiots

- "I made u something to show my gratitude"

*picture of a stick figure*

"......Thanks"

- tealc and the little boy 💗💗💗

- what is it with sg1 and adopting every child they meet

- "dogs are my favorite people"

~

Songs under the cut

🎶listening to Young And Alive by Bazzi🎶 in honor of merin missing out on regular childhood

🎶listening to Fifteen by Taylor Swift🎶 because Sam talked about when she was fifteen

#stargate season 3 #daniel being cute with kids?? tealc being cute with kids?!?!?! SAM BEING CUTE WITH KIDS?!?!?! ❗❗JACK BEING CUTE WITH KIDS ❗❗

[merlinthoughts]

Season 1 Episode 2 - Valiant

- ik for a fact that this one is the episode with the asshhoole. not bc i recognised it from the title but perhaps it was because i recognised it from the title u got me there

- i always go to mr clean too when i want protection, val, ur not alone

- yeah, this is harry potter l ma o

- the next thing u know theres a stone that makes arthur live forever and the snakes start joining into one and growing bigger until a phoenix (im dibbing on kilgie here), pops their corneas out

- DAMN DON'T KILL UR DEALER WHERE U GONNA GET THE NEW SHIT FROM NEXT TIME SMH VALIANT

- okay but who names their son valiant

- he was probably named valerie and didnt like it so he said “woah imma be valiant like courage, thats sick”

- that was probably his superhero persona as a child ngl

- no, shev, no respect for val stop doing this

- merlin in armour, what a fucking bLESiSNG GIVING ME THIS RIGHT ON THE SPOT BBC KNOWS WHATS GOOD

- ok a y but hear me out, merlins a servant. i have not seen any of these servants been asked to train with the royals??? like in the sense where it helps the servant train as well?? and the FIRST thing arthur does with merlin as his servant is train with him. not only is arthur a huge JOCK, he’s not using his manservant properly

- neverfuckingmind “most servants collapse after the first blow”, so it seems to be arthur likes to train with his servants. now that in itself is a question to be asked, but is he the only royal who trains with his servants??? how did this man survive on his own without a personal servant until merlin??? did he have a personal servant??? was it just regular servants?? who are those other servants he trained with??? did arthur just say hey lets go to the field in the morning, put on armour and let’s have a fun time?? UNLESS merlin literally just took someones job away from them kmao

- also my mind went right to the gutter guys, ngl, it sounded like an innuendo. it had me quaking i wish i was one of those servants

- “we all have our duties, even arthur” “it must be so tough for him, all the *hesitates* girl, all the glory”

- so we probably get at least 1 out of every 2 episodes where there’s a scene with merlin dressing arthur in his armour. bring the popcorn, lads.

- MORGANA LOOKING LIKE A FRICKEN SNACK

- the reigning champion is arthur, wonder fucking w h y

- valiant is in fucking mustard, while arthur is fucking ketchup idk why i thought of that but it happened. my literature teacher always told me to look for symbolisms. guess we found one guys.

- merlin after hating on arthur for the past episode is literally just cheering arthur on like a good husband he is

- did ARTHUR JUST SNICKER AT MERLINS “CREEP” LMAO DON'T TRY AND HIDE IT BY HUFFING AT HIM AFTERWARDS YOU FUCKING GOOF

- omg he hid it by telling merlin to do a full novel of chores

- AND MERLIN DOES IT WITH MAGIC A PAIR OF GOOFS

-  “are you using magic again” “no” merlin ffs he just saw you use magic, while the items fell and landed right in front of him while you didn’t move at aLL. they are nOT BLIND

- “very aggressive style” I MEAN SURE UTHER

- valerie be fuckboying morgana lmao with a “i saw you watching” and a, “then i will give everything to win the tournament”

- i wish this show was set in the early 2000s so i can see val in low sweatpants, a backwards cap with gelled spiky hair and cheap neon sunglasses (maybe even some gold teeth just for kicks), while hes trying to rap 50 cents or make a mixtape of brit pop songs. bc yes.

- honestly im loving my 2000 fuckboy au. gonna make an ao3 after this.

- of course merlin would be the one to find out the magic shit in valiants room, it just lures him. AND OF COURSE VALIANT IS THERE

- i'm so fucking glad arthur looks confused as to how merlin did what he asked. when u have this kind of hubby, arthur, its amazing what things he can do.

- i dont know why theres dramatic music as merlin put armour on arthur but im living for it

- “is it my imagination or are you beginning to enjoy yourself?” merlin doesn't know what to say to that bc he’s turning gay and doesn't know if that counts as enjoying oneself when the one you are gay for is the asshole prince

- typically enough, valiant and arthur never fight except for the finale. like with all conveniences in place, youd expect them to have at least fought at some point with as much knights as there to determine the final two but no, just the finale. k.

- this poor fucking purple knighted bloke didn’t need to be fucking demonstrated on, val. like you didn't need to kill him?? that could have blown ur cover

- DID NOBODY SEE THAT??? DID NOBODY SEE THE FUCKING SNAKES???

- oooh merlin found out what happened everyone gonna be fucked. nobody harms arthur is he has something to say about it

- if someone starts off a sentence with “i just saw someones snakes on their shield come alive” nobody would fucking believe you, merls. but given the fact that magic exist… mhh maybe it wouldn’t be too absurd. but ppl apparently are thick as hell

- “why were you in his chambers” well i know how id explain if i was in valiants chambers ;)

- jk i dont fall for this toxic shit

- imagine getting paid as an actor just just lie down there like this poisoned kid. “yeah, id like to audition for ewan’s role???” “why are you lying on the ground?”

- i hate those tropes where it's like “i know how to tell someones bad, here’s proof” and then nobody believes you and tells you you’re lying and should die or whatever but then you kNOW IT'S THE FUCKIN TRUTH BITCH that trope gives me damn anxiety >:((

- yes merlin, fucking slash the shield with your sword. i'm sure that's how it works. im sure it will kill the snakes.

- HOWA RE THE SNAKES ALIVE WITHOUT VAL SAYING “ISHNAHASHAHI”

- i think val would know that you cut off the snake’s head, merls, just saying. ur were the oNLY ONE.

- TELL ARTHUR WHAT??? “I CUT A SNAKE”

- EXACLTY ONG THAT'S WHAT MERLIN FUCKING SAID I WAS RIGHT LMAO

- ARTHUR BELEIVED HIM I'M FUCKING LIVING BUT IK WHAT HAPPENS AND AHH

- uhhh the anxiety is rolling up boys

- ewan is mcfuckingdead

- snake be sliding in like a hoe on a business

- bfehfjdjfskf i hate this part

- arthur's pride, merlin’s pride, fuck me

- i'm not even gonna write this part, it breaks my fragile heart when arthur sees the look of people not believing him, especially his dad, and merlin seeing how arthur doesn't trust him anymore like prepare the eulogies girlies

- okay but if arthur is struck and gaius has the antidote?? arthur aint gonna die technically

- but now val knows merlin knows

- AND MERLIN INTERVENES

- why are royals so bitchy towards servants. like they do their best to help you??? they are loyal to you and are paid there to serve you and are often very kind, generous, passive, understanding people??? yet merlin interrupts uther and he fucking sends him to the pit

- VAL YOU ASS LMAO DON'T HURT MY SON’S PRIDE

- he said allegations like four times, yes uther we know ur vocab is shining with intellect but seriously, there’s other synonyms that could still be acceptable and still sound fancy

- quick search on google bc my mind doesnt roll fast enough: claim, assertion, charge, accusation, declaration, statement, contention, deposition, argument, affirmation. see daddy uther, not hard to look up.

- forget they didnt have internet whoopsies

- :((( arthur doesn't trust merlin anymore

- the husbands FIGHT

- not just a banter petty fight, this is a huge fight

- SACKING MERLIN DON'T FUCKING SACK MERLIN YOU GOOF

- TRUST UR HUBBY

- FUCK

- I'M GONNA CRY AND IT'S ONLY EPISODE TWO

- I'M HAVING EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS CONCERNING MY TWO BOYS

- GUYS IM NOT OKAy

- its been 2 minutes after i wrote that last sentence, and i am now okay

- “a half cannot truly hate that which makes it whole” iconic as hell. so many things could be said about that quote. either for innuendo purposes, love purposes, destiny purposes, how long it took me to say it right, just so many purposes man. it’s just iconic.

- merlin looks absolutely done with kilgaharama’s shit

- “just give me a straight answer” seems like kilgarass here is being too gay for merlin

- gwen already knows merlin’s the heroin of the series, saying everyone knows it's merlin who will save the day. but same tbh

- i dunno if this is like me or not but it says her nickname is gwyn in the subtitles but im typing it as gwen which i thought was how u wrote it, even if her full name is gwynevere but like gwen has a ring to it while gwyn sounds like gwin or smth and i dunno which one is right so ill just leave it alone ahjsjfk

- MORGANA HAS VISIONS WE ALREADY KNOW WHERE THIS GOES SHES MAGIC ISNT SHE HAHAHAHAUHD

- merlin trying one last time to convince his husband not to die, but at least this time arthur knows he’s up for val’s magic and is like “k iloveyou but i have to do this for the country not just bc of pride and thinking val is not magic”

- staring into the fire like he’s hoping it would suck him up into the void, not only is merlin a now confirmed emo, so is fucking arthur it seems. perfect for one another i'm telling you

- eerie music as morgana enters… wha suddenly i can't read

- i thought at first morgana and arthur were gonna end up together cause of the fucking weird tension going on and i was prepared to be disfuckinggusted but no! the show and producers actually put my expectations away and helped me see that it wasn’t going in that direction! thank fucking god! 

- k but arthur looks majestic in his gear im just a huge bi

- “don’t go into my room” he says then gaius peaks in and almost gets mauled by a large chihuahua

- me too val, id step on someone's toes then fuck them up with an undercut. thats the bad bitch way to go. unless it for arthur, then val hahaha you can go fuck yourself

- no one sees mErLin??

- but they now see the snakes smh fakes

- “what are you doing? i didn't summon you” i don't think that will work val cause you didn't say it with a serpent tongue, it has to sound more like “shhashhwhat ahhssare hiisssyou iisshhaadoing?”

- okay but i thought arthur was impaled for a half second until he started to talk then i screamed that he was aight and he would now believe merlin

- uther better give merlin an apology

- arthur just said he wouldnt

- but still uther BETTER APOLOGISE TO FUCKING MERLIN

- “yknow i wish valiant was escorting me” “me too” i thought for a fricken moment arthur wished valiant would have escorted HIM. i'm dying.OMG

- “i wanted to say i made a mistake. it was unfair to sack you.” “don’t worry about it. buy me a drink and we’ll call it even.” DID YOU JUST SAY WHAT I THINK YOU JUST SAID MERLIN YOU SLY DOG OMG

- “i can’t really be seen to be buying drinks for my servant.” so if he wasn’t ur servant?? you’d say yes?? they are so fucking gay i can't anymore

- yeah, i literally fucking can't

#merlin #merlin bbc #merthur #s1 #this is early bc well it was already written #peeps up for the next one boys #tho its not done #expect it in a few days oop #s1.2

[tumblunni]

OH MAN THAT EPISODE WAS SO GOOD

Amethyst is the beeeeeeest

God that was so great any time we get Honest Amethyst Feelings it is pure gold!!! I love hpw she somehow manages to be both the cheesy shonen protagonist fun goofball and the tsundere grumpyness at the same time. So complex aaa so many good sad complexity plots because SHE CANT TALK ABOUT HER FEEEEEELIIIIIIIIIINGSSS

Feeeeeeeeeeliiiiiiiiiiiings

U make me feeeeeel them amethyyyyyyyst

And man i also kinda love this one thing that the show is really good at? Its good at actually making people's mistakes genuinely hurtful, and genuinely misleading the audience. Like I totally thought amethyst was backsliding here and losing some of her character development when she suddenly started acting aloof to the problem of ruby being missing. But then it turned out she was faking being 'normal goofy sunshine amethyst' because its the only way she knew to cheer steven up. She just tried too hard and made it look like she didnt care. But it all worked out in the end cos it led to them having a more honest talk about feelings :3

And like they did a very similar thing with Peridot? With how it slowly became apparant that her rudeness was due to her being raised in a bigoted society, and she was indeed capable of learning otherwise, when at first she'd looked like a realy big ol scary villain. And then the awesome tension of her redemption episode where it looked like she was gonna betray everyone but then she called her boss a clod instead and officially sealed her goodness! Like.. In most other kids shows I probably would have been like 'nahh its not gonna happen, she's totally gonna predictably be good' but in this show they always take such unprrdictable routes to the ending. And like.. The characters are never 100% morally pure even when theyre heroes, they all still make mistakes. You could pretty much pull any conflict out of a hat and there'd be a very natural and emotionally logical way for thay character to end up in that position if you played the fiddle of their heart just right. Flawed casts are an infinate well of new plot ideas, yo! And man i just really like how amethyst's tsundere-ness can sometimes be a joke but its always taken seriously at the same time? Aaa its so hard to put words to this!!

Anyway MAN wasnt that a great episode??

I like the kinda confirmation here that she saw rose as more of a mom figure than everyone else, and sees steven like a little brother rather than a son. I mean that's a feeling I always got from their dynamic together but its nice to see it addressed in canon.

And DEAR GOD it hurts my soul that amethyst was being all mature and considerate and trying to not show everyone that she was sad cos itd make them more sad, but in the process she looked inconsiderate and made them more sad anyway. God she's such a good symbol of that nebulous late teens early 20ish period where youre trying to pull yourself together into the idealized version of adulthood you think exists, but instead youre realizing your idols didnt know what they were doing either and adults are really just human too. Theres no magic moment where it all clicks and becomes easier, yet you still have to try and look that way so youre a good influence on the kids. Amethyst tries to be 'fun mom' but she's also always worrying about being a negative influence on steven, i think. And it shows a lot of progression from where she was at the start of the season when she was just like 'psshaw u guys worry too much, youre the boring adults and me and steven are cool'. Like she doesnt see herself on the same level as him anymore and it hurts. We saw some of this before when she was scared that he'd become stronger than her and now she was completely useless to him. I like this because its a way of showing how in real life people dont always get better over time, but also not retreading old ground by making her relearn the same morals or anything. She made new mistakes as she learned more emotional maturity, she ended up accidentally hurtibg her friends in new ways or feeling low self confidence for different reasons. And also even when she's acting the same its for different reasonsb she just pretends to be her old disinterested emotionally immature self cos she thinks thats whatvshe needs to be to motivate everyone. Amethyst your fun mom status didnt entirely hinge on you smiling 24/7 no matter how much it hurts!!d

Aaaaagh ame seriously aaaagh it shows a lot of maturity to be like 'i dont wnana burden steven with more problems' but also YOU DESERVE TO TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS TOO and HE WOULDNT SEE IT AS A BURDEN

Im so glad they had a good lil talk. I hope they get to talk in more depth about the complex rose feelings that she's keeping locked away, even if she feels like now isnt the time and they need to stay focused. I hope the gang gets some down time to actually fully examine their reactions to things and wprk thru yhe trauma, rather than it being a rush from one conflict into another like the zoo arc or the connie phone thing. We needed a good episode like this after those ones, yknow?

God ame is just so hugs

Forever fave

Good punk sister who is doing her best

Lovv she

#su spoilers

[phoenixbrandtackerman]

It’s anime rant time again!

Okay. So I just watched a Film Theory on My Hero Academia that suggested All Might had a “buff up” quirk he didn’t know about before he inherited One For All. The video claims that the difference between All Might’s muscle form and his actual form are because of this quirk he didn't know he had. 

No. Just...no.

Additionally, there was also a claim that Midoriya was able to use 1,000,000% power. *beleagered sigh* Also a flat no. Anyone who typically watches anime understands exactly what Midoriya was doing there. It was a hype-up. A confidence boost. (Apparently this was also confirmed by the writer.)

At the beginning, Midoriya hadn’t even inerited the full quirk yet. (Duh, All Might is still going around superhero-ing even though he’s passed the quirk on, which I took to mean that it would transfer over time and not in a single instant - wasn’t this out-right stated?) Also, at the beginning, Midoriya can only use 100% or 0% of One For All (of the percentage he’s already inherited from All Might). He hasn’t had any training and has no idea how to use it yet. The sheer power output breaks HIS ENTIRE BODY the first time he uses it. During the attack on the school, Midoriya is able to throw ONE PUNCH that isn’t a lethal shot. Just the one. He figures it out a bit more while training with Gran Torino. His SAFE LIMIT is a certain percentage of the power he has. If he goes over that, he damages his body. There’s a BIG difference between using 100% of One For All (All Might at the start of the series), using 100% of a percentage of One For All (Midoriya before All Might no longer had One For All), and using a percentage of a percentage of One For All (what Midoriya can use safely without injuring himself before the quirk was fully passed on to him). 

Would it make sense for every hero who has inherited One For All to pick people with quirks that work with One For All? Sure. But because we don’t have any actual proof of that process, it could be as simple as it was for All Might to chose Midoriya -- he chose someone with a good heart, and who just wanted to help people in any way he could. It’s also possible that All Might had way more training before he inherited One For All than Midoriya did, which could easily explain why he was able to use One For All right off the bat. He had more time to prepare his body for it. 

Also, if we realy want to talk about it, All Might wouldn’t have inherited 100% of All For One instantly either. It would have happened over time, just like we see with Midoriya, and while we see him training with Gran Torino and he isnt a muscle-bound giant (but still muscular), those could also be his earlier days of training. Gran Torino is beating the tar out of him in that scene/frame. Would a more tained All Might be letting Gran Torino just whoop his ass like that? My personal guess is that as he gained more experience using One For All, he also gained more body mass. There is a grand assumption that Midoriya is going to stay the size he is at the current point in the story. That is not a guarantee. He could also eventually become a buff giant like All Might and stay that way. Part of his training with Gran Torino is to emphasize that he should keep One For All activated. As All Might did. 

Another point to be made is that we don’t know what inheriting One For All looks like with anyone other than Midoriya (because he’s the protagonist and this is his story). Let’s look at Todoroki as an example. His father purposefully bred him to be the way he is. We are shown that he has other siblings as well, and all of them have different levels of each ability despite having the same parents (and allowing for the possibility of some of those kids having different mothers). I’m not even going to go into it beyond this: we don’t know if the differences we see between users of One For All are due to biological differences, or if the fact that the method of passing the quirk on is by DNA sharing would change something in the next person’s use of One For All. 

Let’s move backwards a bit to the drastic difference we see in All Might between his activated appearance and his seriously emaciated actual appearance. At least in part, this is visual shorthand - the stark difference between All Might, the grand, buff, perfect picture of a hero versus the emaciated, tired, injured Toshinori? Yeah, there’s a visual metaphor in there too, but I’ll let you guys suss that one out. All Might is unwell in the extreme. He is missing organs, he spits blood a TON (though it’s usually played for laughs), his eyes are sunken in. He looks like a walking corpse. There’s a reason for that. He’s dying. 

One more point to make here is that the assumption that One For All, because it is described as one that stockpiles power, does not have any of the actual quirk effects of previous users. We don’t know that. It is possible that the quirk was passed on to people with strength-specific quirks. We also don’t know that One For All isn’t an effect-stack quirk. (Note that I am playing devil’s advocate here -- I am making the point that saying One For All “stockpiles” quirks is vague enough that is allows for multiple ideas to possibly be true.)

Here’s my main problem with Film Theory when they tackle anime: they seem to be paying half attention to what’s right in front of them. I also had a ton of problems with the Film Theory done on Attack on Titan for much the same reason. Additionally, I know it is no accident that the third season of My Hero Academia is coming out and there’s a Film Theory about it. The same thing happened with Attack on Titan. I’ve noticed a ton of people point out innacuracies in the math done in one of the Fullmetal Alchemist theories. I didn’t have a problem with that one. I also didn’t have a problem with the one on Swoard Art Online (even though I loathe the actual anime).The difference was in the level of care that went into it. Even if some of the math may have been wrong (I am no expert -- this was something I was seeing endlessly and incredibly specifically in the comments on that particular video), they still did all that math. 

I’m not saying I don’t want any more theories on anime. I’m saying that there’s a clear difference between a quick popularity grab attempt and something that they actually care about making and it is painfully obvious which is which. 

#Film Theory #My Hero Academia #All Might #Midoriya #I had a problem with this one guys #Attack on Titan

[sansa-hand-of-the-king]

1./ The spoilers are lacking context so of course we can't be certain of their validity. Yet filming locations and photos are supporting the overall outline so no doubt there is truth in there to some extent. With this in mind and following up on your reply to a recent anon that "but (Jon) will have a passionate love with Dany too", if it weren't for the spoilers would you still expect this type of relationship between Jon & Dany? To me this outcome is maddeningly predictable. Continued in 2./

2./Now that I began reading the books I feel GRRM is not predictable, writes with way more depth than this. I admit it annoys me that Dany is apparently having yet another man fall for her. It seems too on point. This is not about shipping per se BTW. It actually feels more like HBO than GRRM. I will have other questions in separate asks!

I hope you dont mind that i united the two separate messages like this ( I dont know if thats  how its done…). I have read the spoilers and I think they are (somewhat) legit. I had no doubt that Jon and Dany will hook-up at the end. In the books there are a lot of signs (the whole man in the shadow that dany dreams as her lover is what pretty much confirmed it for me) 

Plus I always felt that Dany and Jon are what Sansa and Joffrey were supposed to be: the tragic passionate love, that sansa dreamed as a child. But just like those songs Sansa loved so much, it wont (for me) have an happy ending. 

I have a feeling Dany will die in child birth, not only because the third time is the charm (first with rhaego, then she has a miscarriage after daario,…then Jon child) but because of this quote: 

A blue flower grew from a chink in a wall of ice, and filled the air with sweetness.

Not only blue flowers are connected with Lyanna but the sweetness in the air is NOT a good sign (grrm connects sweetness with death..pretty much always)

In the show Daario gives flowers to Dany and one of them was a blue rose. (maybe a coincidence but a strange one..)

From the books there is also this: 

 . . three fires must you light … one for life and one for death and one to love … … three mounts must you ride … one to bed and one to dread and one to love … … three treasons will you know … once for blood and once for gold and once for love …

Dany physically lit a fire to bring her dragons to life. Lights a Fire for Life.Dany has to bed Drogo, as it was required to consummate the marriage. Mounts one to Bed.Mirri Maz Duur betrays Dany, the cost of which was blood (i.e. the loss of Dany’s child and Husband; family; blood) Betrayed for Blood.

Then we have the betrayal for money which could be Jorah or more possibly Hizdahr zo Loraq (who is also the mount she dreads)  and the fire for death (the death of the masters) 

All that is left for her is the mount to love and the fire for love (also the betrayal for love): Jon is the answer to all. He will be the mount she will love and they could form a fire for love ( saving the realm) but the betrayal is difficult to predict. 

It could happen that Jon betrays her for the starks, (maybe Arya) 

but my guess is that Dany choosing Jon could lead to a treason. Someone who isnt really convinced she will be a good ruler, someone who thinks Sansa will have made a good queen ( “She would have made Joffrey a good queen and a better wife if he’d had the sense to love her.”) Someone who is  now hand of the queen and (if the spoilers are true) has deep reservation of how dany uses her dragons. (its has clear in season 6 too): Tyrion. (someone who thinks targaryans children could be mad like aerys….).

 look at this quote of dany dreams: 

No. Hear me, Daenerys Targaryen. The glass candles are burning. Soon comes the pale mare, and after her the others. Kraken and dark flame, lion and griffin, the sun’s son and the mummer’s dragon. Trust none of them. Remember the Undying. Beware the perfumed seneschal.“

and lets look at Sansa and tyrion weddind night: 

she climbed onto the featherbed, conscious of his stare. A scented beeswax candle burned on the bedside table and rose petals had been strewn between the sheets.

Now I know this is a very crack theory (all my ramblings posts are, really) but still its a possibility.  

I also believe that Sansa will do (she already has done ONE) the same betrayals: 

How well I know that, child,” Cersei said, her voice so kind and sweet. “Why else should you have come to me and told me of your father’s plan to send you away from us, if not for love?

“It was for love,” Sansa said.

The first betrayal of Ned (as much as I love Sansa and i can understand why she did it, it was still a betrayal…but not because she wanted to be queen or for power..it was for LOVE).

Then there is the the betrayal for money and here things are just interpretation on my part but Dontos is killed for money. (not by sansa directly of course, but she  the reason he dies..littlefinger kills him to keep the secret of Sansa escape): (But the betrayal for money could also be with Harry the heir and his mother who is in debt with littlefinger.. there is that possibility too..) 

The singers say there was another fool once who was the greatest knight of all... Sweet lady, I would be your Florian

I know it’s queer, but… all those years I was a knight, I was truly a fool, and now that I am a fool I think… I think I may find it in me to be a knight again, sweet lady. And all because of you… your grace, your courage. You saved me, not only from Joffrey, but from myself

A bag of dragons buys a man’s silence for a while, but a well-placed quarrel buys it forever- littlefinger about Dontos death. 

(i also love the use of the term sweet linked to death that Grrm uses always, like with lyanna…)

finally there is the betrayal for blood. What if this betrayal is Sansa killing littlefinger to get Winterfell (and saving a member of her family, in the books: Jon):

I am not your daughter, she thought. I am Sansa Stark, Lord Eddard’s daughter and Lady Catelyn’s , the blood of Winterfell.

I tell you this because the Idea of the story coming full circle between Sansa and Dany makes sense (for me): 

Dany starts the story with a betrayal for blood (that involves her future son, her husbad and her brother) while Sansa begins the story doing a betrayal for love (which includes an hand of the king, and a man she loves..) 

Dany ends her journey with a betrayal for love (which includes an hand of the queen and a woman he loves..) while Sansa ends her story with a betrayal for blood (which includes her brother (jon) and a man who proclaims to be in love with her (littlefinger). 

As for jon and dany being boring I admit  they are not my favorite ( I prefer more aganist..and i am a sucker for political marriages…) But the signs are there for a passionate love story whatever I ship them or not… 

In conclusion: Yes reading the book i would have come to the same conclusion (jon/dany happening). And i did a loooong time ago. Still I dont believe that they will be togheter on the throne at end. (most likely scenario: DANY DIES IN CHILDBIRTH LIKE LYANNA). 

[illlest]

Im just frustrated with the writers. During season 4 I never once doubted that Stiles loved Malia. I actually thought I was witnessing them falling in love with one another. It was so beautiful! During season 5A I was so confused. Like they started off good and then they just started distancing away from each other. Not only that but while Stiles was dating Malia the writers wrote this line in: " He still likes her doesn't he?" Y'all know in reference to whom. By the end of 5A we had to be told that they broke up because it wasn't clear on the show. We didn't even know the reason for the breakup but the writers later on (when they were asked) said its because Theo messed up relationships and Stalia was one of them. Apparently Stalia never healed from that. Still, 5B was the worst. We still got scenes that show that Malia cared for Stiles: "Its him isnt it? That's the one" "I should be protecting Stiles" and so on. We just didn't get the scenes of Stiles showing he still cared for Malia as well. That's when the doubt came in. Did Stiles ever really cared about Malia? If he did then he sure got over it quickly. I mean why else still only show Malia with her feelings for Stiles yet none coming from Stiles? Season 6A so far picks up from where we left off. We can see that Malia still cares a lot for Stiles. She struggled with control without him and she confirmed that Stiles is her anchor. However, from Stiles we really haven't gotten as much. Know what we got from Stiles? This: "Remember when I had a crush on you freshman year, sophomore year and junior year" So what are we, Stalia shippers, supposed to think? Are the writers now saying that Stiles was with Malia even though he knowingly had feelings for another girl? What was Malia to him exactly? Then in this recent episode they conveniently didn't use a Stalia kiss as memory. Kind of seems like the writers are gonna ignore that they dated. Also Malia "saw it too"? When? Malia's memories were all about her and Stiles. Or are the writers now saying she had seen it all along? Yes, the writers can keep on saying " Stiles loved Malia" on twitter but it doesn't matter if their writing on the show doesn't back it up. Im watching the show not twitter. I know Dylan wasnt able to film a lot and maybe that's part of the problem. I love Stiles-he is one of my favorite characters. I dont think he would ever do this to a girl: use her as a 2nd option...but the writers do make it look that way. So Im not frustrated at his character. I love him. Im frustrated with the writers for making him like this and for them doing this to Stalia.

#does anyone else feel this way? #writers be downplaying my otp so hard #stalia

[pipedreamprayer]

ep 68

there was just...so much i wanted to think about after the episode was done that i wound up noting down my reactions and thoughts as I watched to get them straight and wouldn't forget anything

now I’m just...overwhelmed and curious to see if anyone has any thoughts to add to anything - hence me making use of the copy and paste function

Wait, Ai has had dreams before?! Well…I guess that answers the question of ‘’do androids dream of electric sheep’’ even if a fully sentient AI sans the robotic body is a bit far from android…

…why does the Cyvberse look like a set piece? With splits in the panels showing flat scenery and no movement in the smoke of the volcanoes?? IM SUSPICIOUS

Are you flipping serious, Yusaku perfectly serious and straight faced determined that Ai was definitely not present by using soap operas as bait. What is this episode and where has it been all my life

GOOOD GOD ROBOPPI IS THE CUTEST THING EVER!!!!!!!!!

So it’s is now confirmed that none of the others have been to Yusakus house before….and still have yet to…still, I wonder if the whole helper robot situation is a part of the reason he’s allowed to live alone – he has a helper

Wtf what are the little noises she keeps making, her reactions to the butterfly were adorable but the one when she’s plugged in and has hearts in her eyes…Vrains is seriously pushing the robot sex agenda with her aren’t they?

Oh holy smokes they lured him in via his own vanity THEY DEFINITELY KNOW HIS PERSONALITY WELL

Yusaku is learning to be more cautious with his allies and im so proud! if...worried as hell that he’s going in alone

Oooh Flame’s kind of bitter about Windy being treated with suspicion…I can’t wait to see his reaction when he discovers how warranted that suspicion was…

Holy shit even for an insidious plot involving a fake Cyberse the Ignis are enough the comedy part of the show that they screw up faking Linkuriboh - and Ai still doesn't catch on!

Wait…wait the Cyberse was SPREADING before it was destroyed?? That…I worry that has some concerning implications that the Ignis COULDN’T have just…been left alone forever, that eventually their interests would clash with humanities bc they were taking over the network or something

Ahaha holy shit I totally forgot about the whole joke with Ai not understanding Linkuribohs language no matter how he behaves like he does, and now I cant stop remembering the joke at the starts of season 2, damn that was funny

Dear god they even programmed this fake Cyverse to look like corrugated cardboard around the hole rather than, you know, actually make it look more like a real imitation

Damn Ai is well animated this episide…

AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH IT’S THE RETURN OF THE LOST INCIDENT THEME!!!!!!!! that's NEVER a good sign

Dear god the Ignis have their own language and it sounds like speaking in electrofunk tongues straight from digital hell. Really puts that au i’ve been thinking about where the Ignis are demons into perspective…

Mmmmkay so literally every fiber of my being is screaming not to trust Windy at the sight of him. From how he appeared out of thin air (as awesome as that was) to the way he’s sitting to how casual he is about all this, all ‘yo!’ and everything…also, his questioning why Ai isn’t speaking Ignis anymore brings up a lot of questions…especially since the biggest difference between Ai and everyone else is that he’s had an extra 5 years wandering the network experiencing life outside of the isolated space the Ignis made for themselves – he’s seen more of humanity than any of the others by a long shot and he’s decided he prefers emulating them over following the lead of the rest of his own kind, and that’s why I think he’s gonna make a big difference to the war that's apparently inevitable. I even wonder if we’ll see a parallel to what he said to Yusaku about the Cyberse being his paradise at the end of season 1 – I wonder if we’ll see him talk about the good parts of the human world to the Ignis

Oooooh I am EXTREMELY uncomfortable at how the fake Cyberse is now clearly an enclosed box…its really such a small space compared to what it would be, and what ought to be big open spaces for everyone to roam about in have become walls of a container…

Kudos to Windy’s voice actor, he sounds like he has a constant smile on his face even without the character having a mouth…

Oh good, even Ai realises how creepy his associate is

THE SHADOWY MAN ISNT A PERSON AT ALL ITS ANOTHER HOLDING PROGRAM LIKE ECHO OR THE TREE MAN!!!! Fucking hell why did I not think of that before… Bohman and all were never talking to the figure itself, but the Ignis on its arm…

Also HIS EYES ARE DIAMONDS!!! We finally have the full appearances of all Ignis and…damn are they interesting – Lightening is so…sharp in every way!

Ooh wow Ai was so used to being in the real world or Vrains he didn’t consider that he wasn’t limited by physics here…

…Is Ai meant to have hands way bigger than the others?? Cause I just noticed his forearms expand way more than Windy and Lightening at least, I need to look at the others designs to check it i’m pretty sure Aqua and Earth have similarly human proportioned hands compared to the rest of their body

Of COURSE Ai is the one who named him – thinking about it, I wonder if it came from liking his own name and seeing Flame also take pride in his name that he wanted to make sure the Ignis all had names

Wait there was a SPY in the Cyberse that led to the attack?! That...changes a lot of things...there was issues WITHIN the Cyberse that led the danger there, not solely an outside force interrupting their paradise

Aaaw Ai cares about Aqua

Wait she went missing BEFORE the attack?! And Ai doesn’t believe she’s the spy damn I love his faith in her

Hahaha Ai is getting called out for his naming habits and acts like a petulant child defending himself saying it’s for convenience – if that’s not a metaphor for the writers answering questions they knew would come up, I don’t know what is

Uuuuuuhhhh I do NOT trust how much Windy is pushing for Aqua to be the spy…It feels like deflecting the attention from himself and Lightening…but Ai isn’t letting himself be lead about, and somehow the fact it’s out of faith in Aqua as opposed to realising they’re trying to manipulate him just makes me all the more proud of him!!

Ai is asking the real questions here…

FAKE LINKURIBOH IS A SPY FOR THEM BOTH!!??!?!

FUCKING LINK SENSE IN ACTION RIGHT THERE!!! Uuugh this raises so many more questions though….how does he know how to do that?! Has he had practice with it, or is it some sort of unexplained instinct? Why hasn’t he done it before?! Like, I dunno, to find Bohman!!

Mmmmmmmmm I don’t like the superiority complex coming from Lightening…it reminds me of Kogami tbh, both how highly they think of themselves and how they’re of the belief that Ignis are superior but vulnerable enough to be destroyed. Except Kogami thought humans needed to attack before the Ignis wiped them out, and Lightening thinks they need to escape humanity’s reach before humans wipe THEM out

Wtf wtf WTF WTAF nonononono you guys weren’t supposed to actually take Kogami’s crazy lessons on board, you were supposed to have left his control bc you DIDN’T want to do as he said!!

Fucking hell a flaming Kogami bc of how the Ignis were named and…GAH I CANNOT HANDLE THIS INSANITY

So…they’re so high and mighty above the humans, but are utterly dependant on them for survival, as their whole world exists on the manmade network…and they’re going to enslave mankind to ensure they don’t get cut off…writers what on earth...

Oh sweet Jesus humans won’t even have THAT reason to keep existing fairly soon...I am VERY afraid of these 2

Wait, does that imply they’re making robotic bodies or something in order to affect the real world and be able to keep making hardware?? Cause…that could mean IRL duels against robots…

…wha, Ai? Wise? And what the hell is this about evil wisdom?? If that’s a jab at the dark element of monsters leading to fiends and whatnot, I don’t get what evil wisdom actually…implies. You could potentially stick evil in front of anything to joke about the dark ignis if that were the only reason, so there’s something I’m missing…though it’s nice to see that Windy and Lightening aren’t…like, 2 sides of the same coin, they’ve got their individual personalities and quirks and aren’t constantly on the same page

Oh…oh fucking hell he has a good point. I hate to admit it, but he does. Even if Ai believes Playmaker wouldn’t delete him, Ai will outlive Yusaku and then…there’s billions of humans out there, but that’s no guarantee that there will always be at least one capable person willing to defend him from those who DO want him dead. Trying to count on humans when you’re immortal and inhuman is…so risky it basically comes down to blind faith. And, frankly, the acceptance that things will probably one day go wrong. Humans accept the inevitability of death, but damn that must be difficult to face for creatures who’d been promised immortality from the get-go. They’ve been making plans for the long-long term future, so the threat of destruction must be…infinitely more terrifying and unknown to the Ignis than to us…

PLAYMAKER!! Interesting that the other 2 knew he was coming and didn’t…hinder him in any way

Wait, they were waiting for him?! Ooooh that does not bode well…

I’m so fascinated in how they are, for the most part, repeating themselves to Playmaker yet are going about it so so differently from how they treated Ai…

Also, the way the flashback reminded me that Kogami thought of humans as vulnerable while trapped in the real worlds dangers is a parallel to how the Ignis are vulnerable while they don’t have control over the hardware that runs the network they exist on

…DAMN that’s an interesting response from Yusaku! He isn’t denying that the Ignis might well be the closest thing to humanity’s successor, and we know he’s going to be honest about that sort of thing. This is his actual opinion. But, furthering that opinion, that possible label doesn’t give them the right to hurt people as though they don’t matter in the grand scheme of things, like how Kogami treated the kids and their families. And…he’s right, or at least I believe so. The Ignis are functionally immortal and have such power in the way of the network, the thing that humanity is so dependent on nowadays, but that’s not…the most important part of the situation. Yusaku just…wants people to stop suffering, whether by the Incident or the network being destroyed or this whole debacle…god I love this character

Ooooh no Windy took that very wrong…it sucks, bc that’s such a…childish argument! its all ‘’If you agree with me great, if you don’t, then you’re lying about your motivations and you’re an enemy and we shouldn’t listen to you’’! Like…dammit you guys are based off of 6 year olds and despite the whole ‘our mission’ this and ‘enslave humanity until they have no further use’ coming across as big important serious decisions made by big important serious people, they’re not the most mature

…fuck that’s even MORE sinister than I expected! They just…don’t care about humans enough to give a shit whether they’re suffering or have lives of their own, they just see them as a resource that will eventually need to be annihilated before they become a threat to their own existence…dammit, it’s not far from how we treat animals!! In fact, that’s exactly what it is! They consider themselves above humans even though they only exist because of them and are still dependant on them, but don’t see them as worth the same consideration they’d give one of their own (though even amongst themselves they’re pretty harsh given how they’ve talked about Aqua) so they’re willing to use them then throw them away like they…have no inherent value, no right to their own lives! Dammit, this feels horrible being on the other end of that…I might need to go vegetarian after this…

Ooooh Ai you sly fox…as much as I love more validation that Ai is a manipulative ignis and they know it while humans and us watchers have been assuming nothing but idiocy is in that head of his, I wonder how much was…genuine. I mean, wanting to try to find a solution with Playmaker seems…in character for him, particularly after that montage of him remembering all they’ve been through together. Still, the way he said goodbye without looking at them makes me feel like he’s trying to hide how nervous he is…and with good reason since they know what he’s up to. I’m starting to get why they call him wise, which is something I never thought I’d think

Dammit these 2 are really scaring me with how they’re just..so causal about chatting as they let Ai drift farther and farther away, fully aware they can cut him off whenever they feel like it and without a doubt are going to do so…

AGH THESE GUYS ARE ON THEIR HOME TURF AND THEYRE FUCKING POWERFUL

HAHAHAhahahaaaaa*whimper*…at least Windy is aware how sinister they’re coming across, even if he doesn’t seem to care…these guys are reminding me of Revolver and Spectre WAY too much

t-t-take over his programming?? Wouldn’t that…be like an Ignis lobotomy?!

‘’his opinion is 1 in 8 billion – you think that will change everything?’’ uuugh I mean he has a point but also this is a card game anime so…hopefully the answer is yes? Hopefully…this IS a very unconventional YGO after all…

Goddammit they don’t have to be so snide about it! Ai was trying to pass on what he’s learnt in his time with humanity – not to underestimate them! Especially his partner!! God I can’t wait for Playmaker and Ai to defeat them and ruin their plans like they did Kogami’s, it will somehow be even more satisfying to see these 2 learn how wrong they are about humanity…

…HE’S ONLY JUST NOW REALISING HE SHOULDN’T BE OUT OF HIS DUEL DISK?!?! dammit, he really is still our lovable dumbass, isn’t he?

HOLY SHIT A MOTHERFUCKING JOJOS REFERENCE this show has no shame and I can’t get enough of it

‘’After I’ve broken down everything that makes you your own person and absorbed you into myself I’ll fix what I don’t like about you’’ FUCK OFF WINDY

So Lightening is too fast for anyone to follow, and Windy has the best control of the Data storms, Earth is the best duelist, Aqua can tell truth from lies…I wonder what Flame and Ai’s specialties are…Ai’s might be monster making since he gets on so well with Linkuriboh and created Storm Access

WHAT THE HECKITY HECK

OH

OOOOH ONLY ONE PERSON MAKES ENTRANCES THAT EXTRA

Revolver, welcome ba-HE HAS EYEBALLS?!?! And eyelashes even prettier than Playmakers…what

‘’were you able to predict that I’d show up?’’ FUCK YEAH, GIVE THEM A TASTE OF THEIR OWN SASS!!!

Ow…my hands hurt bc I couldn’t refrain from slapping the palms together like an excited seal’s flippers…dafuq is wrong with me, I don't even regret it I was too invested in the new developments!

AaaaaAAAAGGGGHHH THEYRE DESTROYING THE FEEBLE CYVERSE IMITATION like it’s a fake probably meant to lure Ai more than anything but the fact they’re going to all that trouble despite that…damn they look so sinister lit by the fires of their own attack on a defenceless…place. I dunno what to call this area tbh. But it’s such a good way of showing how dedicated they still are to the cause by replicating the destruction of the real Cyberse, and to remind us that, well, they’re not good guys by any stretch of the mind. Revolver might have swooped in and saved the lives of our protags, and may have even intended to interrupt the process, but it wasn’t out of the goodness of his heart, it was most certainly bc of the same reason he’s avoided targeting Playmaker himself – he wants to duel him again and cant if he’s dead. Jeez…here’s hoping at least SOME of him just plain wanted to, just simply didn’t want him to die (even though he still definitely wants the Ignis dead).

And on that note…he kind of has a point, much as I hate to say it. These 2 are literally aiming to enslave and wipe out mankind after all…but goddammit I want to be on Ai’s side and say that there’s hope for a peaceful resolution! I just…don’t know if it’s possible with both sides containing such stubborn, angry parties…is it even possible for beings so long living to change their mindsets from what has apparently been their thoughts since creation? I can’t imagine Ignis commonly being open to change…

Uuuugh my god that preview though…Ai and Playmaker are caught between a rock and a hard place, 2 sides riling for a genocide of the other while the ex-emissary of revenge tries to talk peace and acceptance, co existence and letting go of one’s rage in order to have hope for the future…and that…kind of feels like what this is really about? As in, the future. Both Hanoi and the Ignis (not just these 2 but all of them sans Ai) are concerned with the future, with making sure they survive to EXIST in that future no matter the cost. And then there’s our protagonist pair – one who fought so hard to be able to move on from his trauma, to have a future worth living at all, and the other who spent his time in the Cyverse idling and enjoying life one moment to the next with no real regard for his duty as a leader there…who has now learnt so much from these transient humans in regards to taking risks and working hard for what is worthwhile. They’ve certainly got the best chance of anyone in the 8 billion strong population of the world of getting through to these guys, of changing their minds about how to consider the future.

#vrains #episode 68 #ygo #ive never done something like this before #but fuck it #im just throwing all of this out there #why the hell not #go nuts

[vitalmindandbody]

Admissions Of A F* ckboy: I Donated To A Sperm Bank And It Was Such A Tour

Walking out of your accommodation with the intent to masturbate is an uneasy feeling.

Its uneasier knowing youll be doing so legally, safe from the handcuffs and stigma that follow the demoralizes whamming off in the subway.

I truly had to snicker at the believed to be the whole thought. There are loopholes everywhere in this nature, as long as you know how to find them. And here I was, swiping my MetroCard with a hop-skip in my pace and an attention toward one of those imaginary destinations you know is real, but hidden, crammed into metropolis like secrets.

The sperm bankwas a place that didnt merely examine fondly on masturbation, butit and would compensate you for it.

As far as loopholes croak, the sperm bank, just by prevailing, felt like a long overdue affirmation to my 12 -year-old self, who, I swear to God, would have ejected on his eggs every morning if he could.

Because no matter who he grows to be, every adult male comes from a squirming, semen-crazed cretin conducted around for years by the incorrect psyche. Its embarrassing on some stage, but real and inevitable and completely normal on another.

Its important to remember who you are and where you come from.

I hate my 12 -year-old self, but hes certainly good-for-nothing to be scared of, and he deserves some enjoy because it was all he required. So I channeled him as I skipped off the metro and into the shambolic normality of Lexington Avenue atnoon.

Walking against congestion, I weaved and swerved through the 401( k) combat: dejected investment categories, the wind blowing their ties up their cervixes; preppy, young go-getters, wearing purple on purpose; measured women around pantsuits onhands-free labels; bald managers indicating off every possible face spaces, windshields, the wind itself.

Everything steel, everything imposing, everything sculpted. Yet, somehow, everything also severely edgeless.

I often feel like an infiltrator in this field, whichfeelslike one large-scale savings account is built around Yes Men and 40 th-floor favors. Like me, all of them had1 2-year-old versions of themselves, but theyd all been thumped out of them, like boners tucked up in the waistbands of their own lives.

After split second of investigating their faces, their headaches were plain to read: These parties seemed entirely unaware of their close proximity to a biology lab that mostly doubled as a modern succor terminal. They involved a release.

I smiled at them from under sunglasses as I approached the labs build: a grey-haired monstrosity branded as country offices spa. Glass doorways discriminated the street from a lily-white, modern lobby.

A concierge buzzed me through without judgment.Instead, he grinned, too. That corroborated mine and redoubled as a tap on my 12 -year-old selfs shoulder, almost as if to allege: See buddy, you werent so bad after all.

For those who dont know, sperm banks( or cryobanks) accumulate and distribute donated bodily fluids and tissues to people who need such things. The broth is disproportionatelysemen, but also includes embryos, oocytes, ovarian tissue, testicular materials, and more.

Sperm tests are analyzed for effectivenes, condition, vitality and health and, if accepted, are frozen until a later date. Women interested in in vitro fertilization then re-examine stored tests, hand selecting characteristics theyd prefer in their child.

This establishes cryobanksthe ultimate Darwinian battlefield.

In vitro fertilization isnt uncommon, but its still comparatively uncommon, and given the size of the potential donor base, requirements are strict. Most banks wont accept a donor shorter than five foot seven, and overweight donors are generally repudiated. Some clinics admit only 1 percent of donor applicants.

Certain qualities are in higher request statistically. Mothers miss their children are derived from physicians more often than from taxi operators, for example. Theyd rather their babies not havecertain genetic fragilities, like a familial record of diabetes.

They likewise disproportionally crave semen of Italian genealogy, for whatever reason.

In vitro fertilization is commonly an upper class alternative, so it simply constitutes sense that such fathers would prefer donors with more white collar professions, backgrounds and appearances.

Basically, what that mean for dudes is: If you want to be a donor, you need to be towering, strong, fit for rearing and an admirable representation of traditional success.

Blue-eyed, spaghetti-loving intelligence surgeons who are somehow six-foot-four and free atnoonon aThursday thats the archetype. The world is, most donors are young men with flexible hours who could use the money. Like me.

I pressed the elevator button and squirmed anxiously as the doors closed, agitated to be acknowledged that my swimmers stacked up.

If you want to be a donor, “youve got to be” towering, strong, is suitable for raising and an admirable of traditional success. Blue-eyed, spaghetti-loving brain surgeons who are somehow six-foot-four and free at noon on a Thursday thats the archetype. The actuality is, most donors are young men with flexible hours who could use the currency. Like me.

The fourth floor opened to a tiled hallway lining two disconnected place infinites. The kind of fluorescent dawns youd see in a dentist officebathed the corridor, committing it a infertile look, like somehow this is only the test tube and you were already in it. A really strange meta/ horny combo ethos crowded the room.

And that was when I went past all the jizz decorations.

Thats right, jizz emblems. At the conclusion of its hallway, two glass entrances signaled the entryway to the donor part of the cryobank. Through the glass, it ogled not unlike your usual physicians bureau waiting room: portable chairs rowing a direction to a receptionist window, a non-functioning television hanging above apprehensive patients, publications, snacks.

But if you zoomedOUT and focused on the doors themselves, it suddenly became apparent this wasnt a typical clinic.

You know how a kindergarten teacher will print out unthreatening cartoons of swine, like a lion, and staple them to abulletin board? Its for medal, but its too supposed to help the minors informed about vowels, and lion has two vowels in it.

But they dont magazine out an image of a lion destroying a zebra carcass. They print out an image of him smiling, returning a thumbs up whatever.

Well, the glass openings of this clinic are decorated with similar epitomes of sperm. Earnestly. Animated blue swimmers glued to the doors accepted donors in what purposes as a disarmingly transparent salute and super-effective confirmation that, yes, theyre in the right place.

A printout speaking DONOR ENTRANCE sits scotched-taped between the imitation swimmers. The clinic literally shapes you walk through the sea to come in.

So, thats what I did.

They construct you fill out species. Lots of forms.

The booklet sat eight pages late in the clipboard. A heated, post-grad liberal character with a Lena Dunham haircut handed it to me at the receptionists desk, right before informing me I wouldnt be paid for this visit.

I accepted her as the woman whod answered my email inquiry and scheduled the visit. Donors are only paid after theyve been accepted, she spoke. Today was my trial run.

All right, I mentioned. I understand.

I sat down with my brand-new publication. The extend sheet was filled with foreground verse and capital letters.

PLEASE READ INSTRUCTIONS CAREFULLY.

WRITE CLEARLY AND LEGIBLYON ALL PAPERWORK.

WRITE TODAYS DATE ON EVERY PAGE WHERE DESIGNATED.

PRINT YOUR FULL LEGAL NAME AT THE BOTTOM OF EVERY PAGE.

PLEASE INITIAL AND DATE ANY CORRECTIONS THAT HAVE BEEN MADE.

Very ominous, all these directions. Exceedingly clinicalNot exactly an aphrodisiacal environment.

I flip-flop the page.

First, they want to know all your medical record, then all your genetic history, then all the medical record of your family.

Do you have any history of epilepsy, of hepatitis, of Zika, of this, of that? How many maternal uncles do you have? How many paternal aunts? Where did they come from? Where are they now?

Have “youve been” traveled out of the country? Where? Have you ever traveled in different countries? When? Where? Have you ever been incarcerated? Do you have sounds? Pages and pages of this.

Finally, you turn to a page that asks you to detail your sexual record. The questionnaire asks you how many sexual partners youve had in the past 12 months, then asks you to list them and gives youspaces to do so. Five.

Not merely do they expect me to recollect my sex partners, but they are leave room for five? Hilarious.

I literally burst into laughter.Good happen I was the only one waiting.

The questionnaire asks you how many sexual partners youve had in the past 12 months, then asks you to itemize them and gives you five spaces to do so. Five. Not exclusively do they expect me to remember my sexual marriages, but they are leave room for five? Hilarious. I literally burst into laughter.

Youre likewise asked to itemize what shield you used, every time, with each partner. It was an depleting exercise in reminiscence and defy that I ultimately succumbed to.

I couldnt help but lie on that portion. I only didnt know.

Shortly after, a man penetrated mid-3 0s, blue sweater, classy jeans, bald manager and whisker. He looked as if he could be coming from anywhere in New York.

Walking up to the receptionist, he removed a card from his pocket and swiped it against a card reader while in stride. The readers initiated a light-headed a opening guiding within the agency, unlocking it.

I mustered he was an active donor, a person who had already well underway screened. Active donors are frequently allowed to donate several times per week. Each season, they received about as much money as I do for these columns.

The man didnt look up or clear attention contact with anyone. He just marched in.

Because Im a dick, I made a document of the time.

Over the next fewminutes, I fucked up the forms multiple times while my blood sugar descended considerably and while, I reckon, Bald Man experienced himself.

I sided my completed application form to the Lena Dunham woman, was told to wait and then was handed them back by a cheery, unionized type who emerged from the back of the agency and put me more in the mood.

She had complicated brown seeings that bristled with this concoction of compassion and permission and you want to fuck me matter-of-factness. They almost became me guilty for being there, selling the future infants I could legitimately suppose establishing her.

This entire slouse needs to be filled in, she told me calmly.

I missed an entire division?

She smiled like I wasnt the first idiot, and wouldnt be the last.

I missed lunch, was my lame excuse.

Thats why we have snacks, she answered. Help yourself.

I hadnt discovered just how stunning a collecting of treats this waiting room offered popcorn, corn microchips, protein barrooms, granola rails, trail concoction, cheese scrabbles (!!).

Being the only one there, I decided to load up before Bald Man reemerged. I went to town, spraying crumbs all over the questionnaire, which was now asking me which street medications, if any, Id assimilated in the past two weeks. You mean besides cheese scrabbles?

I reverted the forms. Boss Lady approved them, eyeing the popcorn scraps on my upper cheek. She asked me a few more wonders, squinted suspiciously and asked me to sit again.

On the practice back to my chair, I find a portable refrigerator in the reces of the room. It was labeled DONOR REFRIGERATOR.

, I belief,

Boss Lady receded out of display, and “its just” me again. I had half a sentiment to openup the refrigerator and picture for myself when Bald Man rose again from the glass openings, his head down, never bursting his speed as he departed in a hurry.

I look back my watch. 11.5 hours. I thought.

Lena Dunham instructed me to walk through the glass openings to a back area where I would situate my test. She handed me an empty plastic beaker with a off-color name, a sticker with my figure on it.

After youve deposited your test, youll realise labelled go-carts in the hallway, she said. Youll leave your test there to be analyzed, and well advise you in a few days.

I nodded and saw my road down the passageway where four tiny quiz rooms waited, all exhaust. I chose the most significant one and looked at my watch.

The room was coated blood-red and nondescript. A single portable chair sat in the middle, next to an intent counter. A subside remained on the back wall below a clue, imploring patients to cleanse their hands.

Another sign informed that lubrication was available upon request. Another non-functioning video hung from the wall.( I acquire it was non-functioning; I didnt want to touch anything more than I had to .) A stack of Hustler Magazines weresprawled and weathered on the table.

I closed the door. I anticipated.

I grew up with Internet porn, never even considering magazine porn. Its kind of like the path millennials consider newspapers: pointless, burdensome remnants. But here it was, my only option.

I wondered if it would even work.

It did. I started to climbing. Unexpectedly, my original believe, the one that stumbled me as I moved out the door earlier in the day, came again.

I was going to uncovered myself in public, and by that, I represent outside of the privacy rights of my own home.

There wouldnt be repercussions. There would not be police. There was nothing indecent about this revelation, and thats a very strange notion to wrap your heading around, specially when so much blood is hastening from it.

Young guys are studied from such a young age to obscure their boners. Its a proficiency in survival education that evolves as they age, and as the stakes rise. We know instinctively they are important, “they il be” fragile, “they il be” cherished and used.

Not long after we start sprouting, we are told our erections are rude, they are wrong, they are even felon, and we spend the next 50 years or so stuffing them up into our waistbands in suspicion of being ostracized.

Much of a young mans adolescence is an education in abridging his erectings, harnessing them in an attempt to protect himself. So to sit there without dismay genuinely was a trip.

I giggled aloud and wondered if anyone could sound. While Im here, I guessed, I might as well enjoy it, so I clanged off some puns in my head.

I thought.

I snickered.

It all became too much. I looked at my watch. Six minutes killed. Thats more than enough time wasted.

I sat down, breath and unzipped.

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