#BUT YEAH HERE I AM CRYING IN MY ROOM THINKING ABT HOW I FUCKING EXPOSED MYSELF JFDNGJKDFNKJND I'LL JUST DISAPPEAR

[candyredmusings]

“Another One Of Those ‘Things My Discord Said’ Sentence Starters.

Things taken from DMs and a few group chats from Discord. CW: NSFT Change / Edit as necessary !

i am literally tom cruise

cum is cool.

[NAME]  is fucked up cus he is straight man

[NAME]  show me your fuckin tits

[NAME], you better not be standing catatonic in your room wearing your handmade jigsaw robe again.

its like they creampied me but instead of cum it was new music

like what about my pussy-area makes u think sea cucumber

the mind is weak. but the body is funky

so im reading that fanfic where 1d like, buys your soul or whatever and im shook

well tom servo is a sex god

and then i freaked it

FUCK YOU APPLE JACK FUCK

ILL SLURP WITH YOU

LEMME SHOW U DICK

ITS A SIDE QUEST YOU SILLY BITCH

I’m a zombie the law can’t stop me

LEAVE YOUR GOLDEN UNCRUSTABLES OUT OF MY HOME I WILL NOT FALL VICTIM TO THY TRICKERY

you, telling me to ignore a twink with side swept brown hair? foolish.

Hes so hot i briefly started texting like a straight person

and because I’m god and I’ve decided that. No. In fact. I’m not done.

MY DUMB BOTTOM BRAIN FOLLOWS COMMANDS TOO WELL

[NAME], I know you love bloopy reggae jams. Now is not the time

OH THATS WHAT I THOUGHT YOUD SAY YOU STUPID ACCIDENTAL HIMBO DEMON

man i rlly am attracted to paul mccartney.

its not that kennedy was gay af sleeping w jackies fat ass out, he just has a better one-

jealous of my massive honkeers

YOU BRAINCELLED BITCH

this forced open my third eye and i saw the devil--

oh me seeming romantically interested in u is making u uncomfortable?? noted

the only pussy this party city shake out wig looking mother fucker is getting

[NAME]  expose your teeth right fucking now

IN THE DEPARTMENT OF OLD MAN FUCKING, WEVE GOT YOU BEAT

What if we kissed while one of us got called racist and we are both boys

i just jacked it to minecraft piss porn

I will pop a huge tentacle boner

i hate females fr fr

we left u to die to play minecraft

IM GONNA FRICKLE-FRACK YOUR WIFE

CAN I KARATE CHOP IT LIKE IN SPONGEBOB

DWIGHT FROM THE OFFICE IS NOT MY SKRUNKLY

she would never ever take away one of these stupid fucking hats

My brother in Christ you’re being haunted

i want to wring you like a wet towel and slap u against a wall

Yeah you'll come to learn I just have a thing for milk

Piss ur pants harder pls I wanna watch

I'm gonna corn on the kill myself

good morning to parappa and his stans. everyone else..... hi ig

lol look at this clown with no slurs

God has abandoned his children but unfortunately for you I pay child support and I will smite thee.

this is how I reveal myself to be homophobic

I have no sluts

idk what it is abt it but boba makes me become like an actual whore

im homophobic suddenly

he was like ‘You're so big”.... and i just started crying

anyones penis can be hard hes not special

for the love of god please help me

i can talk about piss for hours

im sorry i havent recognized mickey mouse clubhouse ost as the cultural landmark that it is

I ASKED IF WE WOULD RP AFTER FUCKING BIBLE STUDY OR WHATEVER

the benefits of being a yandere is that i dont have to forgive OR forget and I am a living breathing PVP zone so Fuck with me white boy.

When toxic by ashnikko comes on I enter the gaslight gatekeep phases of my girlbosshood

im like a child in line for the newest fucked up disney ride

[NAME] is just all fucking Sorts of fucked up

im clownfaking

why are we here? to suffer? every other day i get messages from a whore

always thinking abt when my friend called me a "white boy whore"

you gotta PUMP the errand girl with cocaine

im beyond shame bc i love all cock try again

people have fetishes.

They really do crucify anyone these days huh

u may have never hungered for cock but you have hungered for a sub sandwich and honestly? theyre basically the same thing-

hi im drawing hentai

[NAME] idk why but that really. makes me want to stab you

“Don't have sex FOMO, [NAME], no! “

“TRY AND NUKE THIS, BITCH.”

“There's a group of golden skeletons behind you hitting the griddy “

“GRANDPA’S ASHES SUCKED MY COCK AND TOOK ME TO ARBYS.”

“You’re lanky with no gender and silly goofy with the rizz it works.”

“You can’t just tell me I could be a Tumblr sexy man to my face at 4:30 PM.”

"I have strong opinions about the soviet union"

“CALL THAT PUSSY THE MATRIX CAUSE IM IN THIS BITCH AND I CANT GET OUT “

“dont cry. 8000 types of reptiles on the planet, okay?”

[NAME] lives his life like he’s an RPG character but picks only the rude dialogue options.”

“I need to beat off to this before God destroys California.”

"No amount of pussy could get me on a rollercoaster with three loops"

"I love your senior citizen pussy"

"Gerber is pretty reliable .. I mean .. The Gerber baby didn't die .... did it?"

“you are white i assume”

"I hate you terrorist, and you may quote me on that"

"I love watching you play minecraft. It's like watching a baby fawn."

"I've never seen old men who fuck harder."

"i don't need him to KILL i need him to FUCK ME"

"well maybe if you just dicked down your wife she wouldn't have gone on a murderous slut rampage"

"why cant these BIG titty bimbos stop HANGING around me"

#txt #rp meme #rp memes #roleplay memes #roleplay prompts #sentence starters #ask prompts #inbox memes #inbox prompts #dj khaled voice: anotha one #candyredtext

[gojology]

Job Benefits (Part Three)

broken routines - chapter three.

you can find part two here : 

part two : undesirable pairing : ceo! gojo x female reader warnings : cursing wordcount : 1442 a/n : im highly disappointed with this but im very hyped abt writing part 4 and uh i need to change my writing style sooner or later wtf is this mess LOL

     If there’s one thing Gojo knows more then his own body, it’s routines.       It’s what he grew up around, coming from such a bustling family. Since he learned how to walk, he had attended many interviews, gone to parties, all in one day. Of course, it was commonplace in his already hectic life. He saw routine in everything.      Imagine his shock when you came into the office in an outfit that differed so greatly from your regular one that his jaw might unhinge and fall off.      He can’t wrap his head around why, but he’s utterly confused as to why you changed this up. Was it permanent, and why the change? He had many questions going through his head. This is one of the many negative traits Gojo Satoru has; he thinks his input is important, even though the majority of time it is... Maybe it was somewhat justified. But he doesn’t realize how unnecessary it comes out to be when no one asked.      No one had ever told him no, of course they hadn’t, he was ranked nationally as an important kid due to his wit and charismatic personality, essential for entering the business industry.     When he opened his mouth to speak, even at 8 years old at his parent’s conferences, the old professionals would all look at him, keenly waiting for his orders, or perhaps his opinion. This was what he grew up having; so naturally he didn’t know any boundaries, nor did he know when to close his mouth.      But that’s besides the point, he thoroughly enjoyed the look on you.     He takes his normal trip down the hallway into your office, humming a tune, a messy stack of papers in one hand, a custom ceramic mug in the other; made personally just for him. He expects to see you in your regular outfit, a pencil skirt, white t-shirt, the short clicky heels, and the black blazer. It certainly made for an excellent example of casual, formal attire.      Unexpectedly, you’re not. You’re calling someone, phone perched delicately on your shoulder almost as if it’s supposed to slip out, your hair framing your face. Lips parting as you start responding to whatever is on the opposite side, and he notices an evident gloss, your lips are a different color too.      You glance up at him and gesture to your phone, and his hands are shoved deep into his pockets, taking this extra time to examine you up and down. White turtleneck, layered alongside a slightly unbuttoned dress shirt with a crisp warm toned brown trench coat. Not too long, not too short.       Simple gold jewelry adorned your neck, and his eyes caught onto the gold bracelet that jingled on your arm as you swayed it around; he kinda found it cute how even when the person you were talking to wasn’t in front of you, you were still so animated.      Gojo can’t see your pants nor your shoes, but he’s about to enter cardiac arrest because truthfully he didn’t expect that you knew how to dress.     “What?” you say, words dripping with venom and menace, putting the phone back down. He’s taken aback, what’s with the tone?      “What do you mean, what, (Y/N)?” giving you a shit eating grin, he takes a step closer to your table.     “Answer my question, I asked first.” you shot back, now crossing your legs, you hope you look bored just to add more insult to injury. The guy deserved it for thinking the world revolved around him.      He doesn’t answer, instead staring at you, setting his cup of coffee onto the already crowded tabletop, slightly hunched over. You feel your heart drop. Fuck, maybe seeking some sort of symbolic revenge against your boss wasn’t the best of ideas.    Actually, none of your ideas were the best last night. Naturally you’d only think up disasters when you were under distress.     “What’s with the new outfit? Buy a new fashion sense on Amazon?” he finally inquires, a tinge of sarcasm in his voice, brushing your... Rude words aside.      You shrug, pulling out your planner from the drawer and mumbling, biting your pen before writing inside, they’re mindless words. You hope your acting is good, because you want to cry again even at the slight sound of those words. “I don’t know, I felt like I would try something different.” Fuck, were was the sass? Why did you answer nervously? Why did you feel so scared?      There was obviously something that you wanted to do rather then chit chat with him, and Gojo’s now unoccupied hand rubs his neck, this was suddenly so awkward, even for someone as lively as him.     “Hm. Right. Anyways, these were in the printer.” he slaps the freshly printed lukewarm pages onto your desk. “Figured these were yours, still had your name on them.”      “Ah. Thanks.” you say before yawning, covering your mouth before sliding the papers back into the drawer behind you- as if you had no care for them. Actually, you didn’t. This was apart of your master plan that you had crafted at 1 AM last night, too exhilarated to rest. You would print papers out in Gojo’s printer, which you had used once in a while prior so it wouldn’t be too suspicious, and since Gojo never left the dang office he’d hear the sounds and return them to you.       Both of you were silent again, and he’s debating between hitting you up with a topic of conversation, perhaps a joke, but you seem so uninterested he’s not sure if it’s the right moment.      “Just to let you know- your lunch break is in 10 minutes.” he adds, whistling to try to appear careless, but he could feel his heart sinking. You were acting unusually cold, no dramatic tantrums from you that he usually loved. In fact, that was the whole reason why he liked coming to your office. That, and the cute stationary.     “Ah! Really?” you make sure to act like you just got a ticket to heaven, just as a petty way of saying, “Hey. You’re boring. I want to get out.” and Gojo’s pretty sure that all the contents of his heart was shattered now.       Hmph. Whatever, if you continued this behavior he’d swear he’d fire you, but even he knows that’s not true. He had grown fond about you over the small amount of time that you had worked as his secretary, besides, what was a good work life if you didn’t have a good relationship with your very own secretary? He’s sure his banter doesn’t affect you.     “Yeah.” he says, now quiet. He turns his back on you, pausing for a quick moment before walking out, not before he bangs the top of his forehead against the door frame, which earned a slight groan out of him, and just like that he left. You still hear the faint clicking against the tile floor from his shoes.       You exhaled a sigh you didn’t know you were holding, twirling your office chair to look at the large window pane behind your desk. This was something you admired about the architecture of the building you worked out. Every single office had a large window facing Tokyo, so late working hours would always involve beautiful city lights and the bustling of night life.       The sun and sky was bright and cheery, and it comforted your frazzled body. Today wasn’t as bad as yesterday, but it still felt strange from not having your daily ridiculous conversation with Gojo- and strangely you missed it.       Instilled with energy and motivation, you stand up, pulling your bento out of your bag, determined to go through with the rest of your plan. You knew Gojo had a good friend that worked here, Keto Sugareu or something like that. You’d have lunch with him, work your feminine charms, and that was that.       It wasn’t like you wanted to, but a part of you so desperately wanted to prove to Gojo that you could be smart, witty, yet sexy at the same time. You weren’t a prude- just someone not as exposed to these lifestyles.     But you didn’t really eat your lunch in the break room, rather, you were almost always in your very own office. If you weren’t found in there, it’d either be the bathroom or conspiring to steal Gojo’s luxury coffee machine at your house. Infact, you’re not even quite sure if you remember how it looks like.    “Whatever.” you mumble to yourself, before scooping up your utensils and napkins and heading out for the break room.      You shouldn’t have ever stepped foot into that cursed hellish room that day.

nice to see u down here, u want chapt 4? too bad. just kidding! here, have at it.  chapter four : conspiring     

#gojo satoru #jjk #jjk fic #jujutsu kaisen #gojo #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jujutsu kaisen gojo satoru #jjk gojo satoru #gojo satoru fic #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo satoru x you #jujutsu kaisen fic #gojou satoru #gojo x reader #gojo x you #au #jjk au #anime fic #fanfiction #fanfic #gojo satoru scenario #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen x y/n

[postmodern-blues]

first listen to rhys and ianto’s excellent barbecue: a saga

I’m just gonna put all my thoughts in order while I listen to this audio and do my homework. I’ll tag it for spoilers, but I’ll also put everything below the cut in case you haven’t listened to it yet <3 um also i do a lot of swearing be warned...

last warning, yall, lots of spoilers and quotes ahead:

Rhys’s friends call him RHYSIE and I Am So Soft For This.

“I’m making my Special Sauce” god if Jack were here....

I love how Torchwood writers can’t even find a way to write RHYS in a straight way. He’s so cute and AHSDHGHFDAS I LOVE THIS SO FAR

the meat jokes.... already.... let’s hope serentiy Ianto does not resurface

IANTO! my god I have missed my boy. HE IS BACK

Oh my god... oh my fuck.... he’s so CUTE i might need to take a breather.... dude....

Gwen looking out for Ianto, inviting him to Rhys’s stuff. DID SOMEONE SAY FOUND FAMILY HMMMM

“lads, lads, lads” I WENT FERAL WHEN I HEARD THIS IN THE TRAILER

“Jack’s sorry he couldn’t come” hhhhhhhh one sausage comes off the barbecue and he’d be like “this is quite homoerotic” HAIJFODHS

Rhys come on,,,, baby,,,,, do not be homophobic about this

I get the feeling I might be going too crazy about this,,, WE’RE ONLY FIVE MINUTES IN

godDAMNIT THIS IS THE SHIT I’VE BEEN CRAVING EVER SINCE GHOST TRAIN afdsohfs

Ianto brought Chardonnay....

“Except Banana boat, he’s a bit thick” AGFDKHDGS R H Y S

oh shit alien things are happening

“yes, RHYS, I know how to discuss my TOP SECRET work at a social event” he’s fucking ICONIC

“you have an inability to call each other by your proper names” my sister is just like this tho... she calls all her friends by anime character names.. little bit better than ‘sticky jeff’ but not much

Ianto being oblivious to Rhys’s gender role shit is just,,,, I STAN HIM

If Ianto and Rhys do not take a ride in the pink car by the end of this audio I’m suing

jkjk but that would be so great wouldn’t it

godDAMNIT i love this audio

"we.... don’t” yet again, it is the 21st century, and torchwood is sooo not ready

“It’s the BOYS’ barbecue” rhys and his friends seem like they have a very cute queerplatonic relationship. wonder if they wear socks when they’re doing “barbecues”

who the fuck is steven.... whAT IS GOING ON

“I don’t know him THAT well, but there’s no way he would call me love” u sure abt that rhysie

“if u run headfirst into an invisible wall, at least let me FILM it on my phone” these two i stfg

this ‘time bubble’ concept has SO MANY FIC POSSIBILITIES why is big finish spoiling us-

jack and gwen going for pizza instead of being at work AHHDOFDGSHK 

oh my GOD THE CALLBACK TO DISSECTED!!!!! this is like when gareth called back to The Last Beacon in Dinner and a Show AHHHH

I am reminded about martha and gwen,,, i am happy,,, the PARALLELS

these two arguing dude the TENSION.. the SUBTEXT

“god help you if you ever hear about pink wine” SFIHOJADHGF 

i swear half my commentary here is me quoting something funny and then keyboard smashing

Ianto is fucking ANNIHILATING Rhys here and by extension gender roles. Goddamnit THIS is the conversation we needed. I love him so much can you tell

“you LOVE each other” I’ve only had this audio for about half an hour but if anything fucking happens to it, i’ll kill everyone in the room and then myself

i don’t think you understand how goddamn adorable rhys is about his friends

“thank fuck none of them are here right now” mate my man badger calls you RHYSIE i don’t think it would affect them

I am so thankful Jack isn’t here because oh my g o d this would be an hour long block of innuendos. this whole audio is just exposing the very prominent homoerotic tendencies of straight men

sometimes, and by that i mean all the time, i wonder if my family hears me listening to big finish and wonders if i’m actually just watching porn. and honestly I think it would be a whole lot less embarrassing if i just told them i was watching porn instead of “yeah it’s this scifi thing these characters are trying to make a hole in an invisible time force field thing. are they gay? no, well, i mean, yes, but not like that! welllll, a little bit like that, but it’s NOT PORN”

“what the hell was that rhys? You Absolute Idiot.” AHHH THESE TWO

“let’s stuff it full of sausages” 

GWEN AND IANTO TELLING EACH OTHER STORIES ABOUT THEIR IDIOT HUSBANDS IS MY LIFEBLOOD FUCKKKKKK

“back pocket” THIS IS SENDING ME BACK TO MY SHERLOCK FANDOM DAYS (fucking remember john getting sherlock’s phone out of his coat that he was wearing? that’s what this is)

Rhys pretending to be Steven (Stephen?) is,,,,, oh my god,,, this is too fucking intense

god i feel so bad for rhys,,, seriously

ohmygodddddd

this took a serious turn I was not prepared for

also gwen wanting rhys to talk to ianto is,,, ughhhh i ship gwen/rhys sooo hard

rhys- baby- oh my godohmygodohmygod

im like,,, IM CRYING BRO THIS IS

“I DO love them” hhhhhh

the special sauce thing is sending me im sorry

“can we rescue the beer?” RHYS

‘Ianto you beautiful man, you did it!” THEY!!! THEY!!!!!!

i wanna make it clear that i don’t ship rhys and ianto but i think they are so cute as friends

guys im in tears right now

the way rhys goes from not wanting ianto here to not wanting him to leave,,, um its a simple arc but i’d also do anything for it

RHYS AND GWEN RHYS AND GWEN RHYS AND GWEN ANDHDHSGHFAOSDLSDLHD

“OH HE’S ADORABLE WHATS HE CALLED?” me when i first saw Ianto Jones onscreen

“he’s a colleague of the missus,,,,,, and a friend” why don’t you just shoot me in the head hm

rhysie,,, baby,,, holy shit you need to go to therapy,,, just like,,, have a chat with janet the weevil and see how you feel after

funny how rhys fucking williams is handling loss so much better than ANY of torchwood. like jack got PREGNANT after losing owen+tosh. Ianto started having sex with his immortal boss after losing his girlfriend. healthy coping mechanisms? who is she?

they let rhys say fuck a lot in this audio and that is Very Sexy of Them

“bunny has run away with my tie” h e s s o f u c k i n g p r e c i o u s

“lads lads lads” AHHHHHHHHH

this audio. is. so good. so cute. so sad. BIG FINISH YOU DID IT AGAIN YOU SEXY BASTARDS YOU!!!!

#torchwood #big finish #rhys and ianto's excellent barbecue #audio spoilers: rhys and ianto's excellent barbecue #audio spoilers: the barbecue one #big finish spoilers #big finish ranting #i loved this one can you tell #torchwood big finish #ianto jones #rhys williams #gareth david lloyd #kai owen #cw: swearing

[visforvengeance]

Your hand holding mine // JJ Maybank

SMUT

Requested by: fucking no one. i just really love jj

Notes: here’s something no one asked for. i have one request for john b. but i’m gonna keep writing bc my stupid idiot brain keeps coming up with ideas. this song was a song that my girlfriend told me abt and it’s so cute. please send me requests, i love u. reposting because t*mblr is being a bitch

Warnings: smut, cursing, i didn’t proofread, nsfw language. i’m not gonna use that warning abt needing to be 18+ because i am literally 17. oh yeah SAFE SEX IS GREAT SEX. i’m sorry if i forgot something. i KNOW i suck at endings ok

Song

Y/n’s POV

“JJ, what happened to you?” I asked as my eyes raked over the boy’s bruised face and body. He shrugged, obviously not wanting to say. He moved past me, without failing to place a kiss on my temple, and into my home.

“I got into a fight,” he stated nonchalantly. My mind began racing as I grabbed the first aid kit from under my bed. Something I’ve learned to keep close while being in this relationship with JJ. “With who, my love?” JJ avoided talking about his fights. Whether it be with his dad or some stupid kook who had nothing better to do.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he mumbled, while holding onto the backs of my thighs. I never forced him to talk about things like this. But, I don’t want him to be ashamed to talk about things that bothers him. I took the alcohol-soaked cotton ball and softly placed it on his busted lip.

He winced at the stinging sensation and squeezed on the exposed skin of my legs. “It was my dad,” he whispered. I stopped my movement and looked up at him. He was on the verge of crying and god, it hurt seeing him like this.

“The cops found out what Pope did to Topper’s stupid fucking boat. They were going to arrest him, babe. I-i couldn’t just sit there and fucking let it happen. So I took the blame. I have to pay 20,000 in restitution and my dad found out and beat the shit out of me.” He was full on sobbing now.

I sat in his lap as he pulled me closer, teardrops pooling on the shirt I stole from his closet. “Oh, JJ. I’m so sorry.” I leaned forward to kiss his head. “Do you want to stay here tonight?” He nodded and held me tighter.

I put everything away and laid down. I pay the empty space next to me, signaling JJ to come cuddle. When he laid next me, he had his back facing me, leaving me to be the big spoon. His body shook softly and his sobbing grew louder.

I held him tighter and kissed his bare shoulder. When he calmed down a bit, he spoke. “Why are you with me? You’re fucking beautiful and one of the smartest people I know. You’re rich and you have a family that loves you. You have your whole life ahead of you and I’m bound to drop out. You could be with Topper of someone. But, you’re stuck with me.” I sighed and turned him to face me. “JJ, you’re saying that like it’s a bad thing. My economic status and whether or not my family loves me has nothing to do with how much I fucking love you. You’re kind and loyal. God, you’re so sweet. You’re so selfless, it’s baffling. And Topper is a sensitive fool.” My hand caressed the sides of his face, causing him to lean into my touch.

“You show me so much love and adoration. The way you hold my hands in yours, how your kisses burn on my skin. It’s addicting. You’re so hurt by the one person who is supposed to protect you, that you don’t even think you’re worthy of love. I’d do anything just to prove that you are worthy of such emotion.” Even in the dark, my lips found their place in his. He kissed me like it would be the last time he’d ever have the chance to do so.

“You deserve nothing but love, baby. You are worth every risk.” We moved so I was straddling his waist. I kissed him like his kiss was the antidote to a sickeningly sweet poison. His ring covered hands slid down my sides, stopping at my waist, signaling me to take off my (his) t-shirt. The cool air hit my abdomen, causing me to shiver. He stopped to admire my body and remove his own clothing.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured. “So are you.” I said as I reconnected our lips and ground my body down on his, causing his moans to occupy the space in my mouth. His hands squeezed my ass cheeks while he forced my body down on his, again. Leaving both of us in a moaning mess.

I could feel his hard cock pressing against my core and it felt like heaven on earth. I moved my hips back and forth, causing a pleasurable feeling for both of us. The sounds he made, made me want to cum right then and there.

His eyes were half-lidded and he looked like he was deep in a state of drug-induced euphoria. His face scrunched up slightly every once in a while. His hands gripped at my waist, stopping my movement. “Babe, I need to be inside you. Please.” He begged. He was a pretty beggar and luckily, I was in a pleasing mood tonight.

I lifted my body enough for him to slip inside of me. While doing so, a hiss left his lips. We paused, so he wouldn’t ejaculate too early. Although, it’s not like I would mind. After a few seconds, I began to rock my hips slowly. His chest began to rise and fall a little quicker.

His hands caressed my tits, pinching and rubbing my nipples. Soft moans filled the air as the pleasure started to rise. The faster I bounced, the louder our sinful noises became. The slapping of skin and the wet friction between my legs created such a melody that was too beautiful to be ashamed of.

JJ pushed me further onto his cock when I came down. His length reaching all the right places caused a warm sensation to build up in my stomach. The sweltering temperature in the room and the feeling in my belly almost caused me to pass out.

“God, I’m so close, babe.” JJ muttered. “I know, baby. Me too.” I said, breathlessly. JJ strewed his eyes shut and began groaning, the warm liquid shooting into my body. The action pushed me over the edge and my body began to tremble with ecstasy. Post-orgasm, my body became rigid.

I moved from the position and collapsed on the bed next to JJ. He removed himself to clean up and grab a towel. After cleaning up and cooling off, he wrapped his arms around me and moved close enough to eliminate any space between us. “You know, you mean everything to me. I’d be hopeless without you.” He whispered as he kissed my collarbone.

“Such a bruised soul, yet I only see a boy who deserves nothing but unconditional love.” I murmured as I played with his hair. “Luckily, you saw something in me that I couldn’t see.” He mumbled against my skin.

#jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank smut #jj maybank x reader #outer banks #outer banks imagine #outer banks smut #tags aren’t working asdfghjk

[marshmallowprotection]

Hehe tonight I’ve talked with my step-sister & her f//her of how my mother is (and was those past years) and like

I always knew we had problems but goddamn, I never thought it was actually that bad (not that I’m saying she’s a terrible person, just that she tends to... keep things to herself way past what’s considered healthy so eventually she breaks down and I get the short end of the stick)

Like the fact she often told me she was going to kill herself so she would be with J again (who was supposed to be my older sister, never knew her since she died some time after birth) when I was around 10-11 y/o bc she spent a shitty day at work. Or like all the times she’s spoken about her to me, actually telling me stuff like ‘she should have survived instead of you’

It’s like... I feel like I’m either used as a replacement for her, or considered less important than her. Fun fact: my second name is J, she choosed it herself, and I’m just considering to find it weird/creepy now that I’ve made the comparison

The times she gaslighted me as well, or the times where she would be getting extra mad @ me and insulting me but if she got called she would immediately pretend everything was fine and nothing bad was happening before returning to that

And

There’s like a lot more things I could say. We’ve lived together (just the two of us) for a lot of time, so I have a lot of shitty stuff of that kind at the back of my head. Which (with some other stuff) resulted in me lying often, or always paying attention to what I say or do, or always checking up who’s in what room before entering

I’m not rlly feeling bad abt any of this rn? It’s not pleasing of course, but for once I’m not crying abt it so it’s better. It’s just kind of... depressing? I guess.

I do recognize that it’s not easy being a parent and all (even if I feel like she doesn’t think I do) but I don’t think that I, a child, should’ve been exposed to stuff like that (at all, and also at the age I was at the time). And I know that losing J was hard to, but having to deal with her telling me that she would rather leave me and fucking die just to be with her again than stay with me is not any easier either.

Woah I talked a lot

TW: Gaslighting, Manipulation

Hi. That’s not okay. That’s sincerely not okay. You shouldn’t have been exposed to anyone or anything that would have harmed you. Grief is a very messy thing, and it will hurt people for a long time but that doesn’t excuse someone telling you that someone should have lived and you should have died. 

That’s not okay and it will never be okay. If she told you that, and she didn’t apologize? Yeah, that is the point where I say that you don’t interact with that person anyone as much as humanly possible and get away from them. I am aware that teenagers don’t have a lot of control to just leave, but you shouldn’t have to put up with that at all. 

That being said, the fact that she’s manipulating you and making you feel like you’re at fault, like you should question reality, etc, that’s not okay. That’s a very serious thing. Children should never have to walk on eggshells for the sake of someone else's feelings. You are a kid, and the adult or the older person in this situation should know better and should try harder to be better. 

Yes, adults and figures in your life can make mistakes, everyone is human. But, there’s a line between messing up one day and apologizing after, trying to mend the issue, and causing the problem in the first place and harming the child. You don’t deserve to be treated like that. You’re your own person. You’re not some kind of replacement for what has been lost. If she cared for you, she would try her best to have a good relationship with you, because your siblings in some way and family is supposed to be important. 

If you’ve been staying together I’m going to assume she’s an adult. If she’s supposed to be caring for you in any capacity, then she’s simply proven to me that she’s in the wrong here and this is emotionally devastating to you and will only cause harm to you in the future, as it already has. That being said, if you’re still around her, you need to take steps to get away from her. You don’t deserve to be treated like this, abused, or gaslight. 

You deserve a family that cares about you and treats you right. None of that is your fault. Nothing is. You aren’t the one with the problem. She’s the one with the problem. I’m coming from a personal space here to tell you that you may be trying to soften the blow of your pain to others by saying that “being a parent is not easy”, because you want to rationalize your pain and feel like it’s not as bad because you don’t know a different life. But, that saying is for when a parent is like, missing one night of sleep because they were making sure that their kid was okay, you lose a little rest, but you do it because you’re a parent and it’s your duty to care for your child. 

If you’re harming someone physically or emotionally, you’re not a good parent whatsoever and you have no right to be around them. 

Definitely focus on this when you’re getting help with counseling because they have the resources to protect you. 

#tw gaslighting #tw manipulation #tw abuse #ask #mod kait #distoartion

[izzy-b-hands]

London By Night, Chapter Six

Brunch, girls’ days out, lads’ days in, and sometimes the best therapy comes from four people who are your friends but also whom you work for (at least in lieu of actual therapy, and during a brunch with weak mimosas.) 

Also Chrissie takes on Y/N’s mum in a wonderful yet polite way while Rico Nasty’s ‘Smack A Bitch’ plays essentially. She’s a fuckin’ rock star in her own right in this chapter (who does not smack anyone, but like...the Tension is there lmao.) 

tw for misgendering, weight talk (...look we’re just not. gonna talk abt what of my own issues w/my mum I’m working out here. It’s just. happening and I’m rolling w/it.), casual transphobia and microaggressions from Y/N’s mum. Pretty frank descriptions and discussion of emotional abuse and fear of physical abuse. This one is...heavy. Take care in reading, y’all. Have a mug of something warm maybe (or cold? it’s summer and I’m melting constantly, have something comforting let’s say.) It exhausted me mentally and emotionally to write, so...yeah. Take it slow reading it if needed, or avoid if it’s too heavy. 

We are eventually going to get to some lightness again in this fic, I promise!

also I can’t decide how I wanna spell John’s nickname, so I just winged it and decided on one spelling at random here lol. 

My love to all who read/like/reblog!

“This is the emergency?” you scoffed, staring at the dishes and plates piled high with breakfast foods on the coffee table in Brian’s sitting room.

“Yeah,” Roger grinned. “We’ve got this lovely brunch, and two more place settings that are empty, and well, now here you both are!” 

“Did you do this just to get her off our backs and into a hotel?” you asked.

“Well, that and I wanted breakfast,” Roger replied. “So I called up Brian and Chrissie, and we got to work; John brought toast-” 

John nodded, a piece of it in his mouth while he reached for a scone. 

“And now here we are! And after a night of dealing with her, you need something like this.” 

“Wasn’t all dealing with her,” Freddie grinned, and you gave him a light jab in the ribs. “Was dealing with someone else too.” 

“Is that what you’re calling it now?” you teased. “Are you going to ‘deal with me’ later, since the flat will be ours alone again?” 

“Down, you two,” Brian laughed. 

“Or you’ll get the hose?” 

“He’ll do it,” Roger said far too seriously, and you wondered exactly what story hid behind that comment. 

But there was no time to ask, as a sudden loud knock on the door startled you all. 

“Who on earth?” Brian muttered, and tried to lean from his seat to look out the front window. “That’s a cab leaving. Who else would be coming here by cab?” 

Your hands shook slightly as it dawned on you, and you set down the plate you’d started to fill with food. 

“Oh fucking hell,” Roger spat, looking through the spyhole of the front door. “Guess who?” 

You carefully but quickly moved from your seat near John, and started for the back door. 

“No, Y/N,” Freddie called, scrambling up to retrieve you. “Be calm. It’s going to be alright.” 

The knocking was more insistent now, just as loud as before. 

“She’ll wear her knuckles through the damned door,” Roger muttered. “Ridiculous.” 

“I’m calm, you said. “Perfectly calm. It’s just that she’s here, and she shouldn’t be because we just left her at the hotel, and how did she even fucking find us-” 

“I love you, but this is the exact opposite of calm,” Freddie cut you off as you babbled. “We’ll get you out of here. Now, she might see us out the back door somehow, so Brian, which upstairs window would you suggest is easy enough for us to climb out of?” 

“What?” Brian frowned. “None of them, because you can’t climb out my fucking windows and go running across the roof?” 

“Now Brian, we’ve talked about refusing new ideas without even trying them and how detrimental that can be-” 

“Yeah, in regards to like...new food in new places while on tour,” Brian interrupted. “Not about you clambering about the rooftop via my windows!” 

“Necessity demands it, Brian!” 

“Even if it did, the back door is still the only option!” Brian sighed, clearly exasperated. “Is she that bad?” 

Roger nodded, eyes wide open as he walked back to the table, snagged a full champagne flute of mimosa, and drained it. . 

“Well, I can’t just leave her out there!” Brian protested, heading for the door. 

“What is all this racket?” Chrissie asked as she ran from downstairs to the door. “All of you that sloshed already you can’t answer the door? There’s barely any champagne in the mimosas...” 

“Chrissie no!” Whether Roger was bemoaning her opening the door or the lack of extra champagne in the mimosas you weren’t sure, but it didn’t matter if it was just one or both, as your mother waltzed in as if she owned the place. 

“Y/N! You left me no phone number to reach you at, and I have a question about the hotel, an important one!” 

“Yes?” you asked, hoping it was actually important.

“Well, I need to know if the hotel serves breakfast, because I am hungry, but you both left in such a hurry! So I had the concierge help me get the same cab you both used, and then I told him I was meant to have gone with you, and that nice gentleman drove me here! But look at all this! Is this the ‘tour emergency’ you were called to solve?” 

“We’re discussing that issue over brunch,” Brian said quickly. 

“They are,” Chrissie immediately backed him, and you wanted to hug her. “So, you’re Y/N’s mother? I’ve been able to hear from upstairs, Y/N has told the boys so much about you!” 

“All good?” your mother asked, a hint of ice in her voice. 

But Chrissie was a natural, or at least wasn’t about to be talked down to in her own home. “Of course! You know, since you mentioned breakfast; I was going to meet Brian’s mum in about an hour for an early lunch. But you could surely come with us; we could even leave early, do some shopping, if you’ve any favorite shops you’d like to stop at.” 

“I’ve never been here before,” your mother said in a voice that rudely insinuated Chrissie should somehow have magically known that.

“Even better!” Chrissie caught your eye and gave a near-imperceptible nod of assurance. “In fact, why not make it a girls’ trip, since the boys have taken over the space here for work? Rog, John? Why not call up your mums, see if they’d like to have a girls’ day out!” 

Roger and John obediently stood and went to the phone, but you couldn’t relax yet. All this was doing was exposing her to more people, surely-

“I’ll call Mary,” Freddie’s voice interrupted your on-the-verge-of-derailing train of thought. “She’d love to join you all, I’m sure.” 

“The more the merrier,” Chrissie said warmly, but you tried to flash him a look that read ‘no’ regardless. Adding in more people couldn’t be the solution. 

Freddie only shook his head at you, and went to wait his turn for the phone, while Chrissie pulled your mother into the kitchen for a cup of tea. 

“You okay?” Brian asked softly as he sat back in his seat. 

“Do you have a sinkhole in the garden I could jump into?” 

“We’ve not had the sinkhole put in yet, sorry,” he smiled sweetly. “I really think this will be better than you must be imagining. Maybe this will help her loosen up, get her off of your back for a bit.” 

“You’re all very kind to me, and to her,” you said. “But she’s not that easily handled. She never has been, and eventually everyone hits their breaking point with her.” 

“Then we’ll just hope that she’s on her way home before any of us reach that point,” Brian said. “Don’t stress more over it, you’ll only do yourself in.” 

“Okay,” you mumbled, and dropped your head into your hands as you went back to your seat. 

“Have a scone, breathe. You’ll be fine, everything will be.” 

You broke off a piece of the scone he handed you and jammed it into your mouth. It was good, but you knew you’d only start to feel better and safe once she was out of the house. 

“They all said yes!” Freddie chirped as he came back in and sat down beside you. “Oh, you look like you’re about to cry. Please don’t, it’s really going to be alright.” 

“That’s what I said,” Brian replied, distracted by something as he leaned back in his seat to look into the kitchen. “I think I get what you’re talking about with her now. How she is, all that.” 

“How so?” Freddie asked.

“Well, Chrissie is shooting me her ‘christ almighty come save me’ look, and that’s only used in desperate times, so-” 

You interrupted him with a frustrated groan, and shoved another bit of scone in your mouth to hold off the tears. 

“I’ll go in and help her out, give her a break for a moment,” Brian said. “Probably good I get to know your mum too, if I’m going to help deal with her, right?” 

“Flawed thinking,” Roger warned as he came back into the room and dropped into the nearest seat (John’s, as it happened.) “I fell for it too, last night. But go on, join us in our misery.” 

Brian rolled his eyes and started towards the kitchen, John popping back in and taking his chair as soon as he was up. 

“So...you know the rest of this brunch is you telling us all about her, right? We can’t talk about anything else now.” 

You sighed. “What all do you want to know?” 

“Everything! Has she always been like this? If so, do you know why? And if you don’t know, why don’t you? Did you do something to her, did someone else? Did-” 

“Deacy,” Roger said. “One at a time; he’s already a mess! And let’s at least wait until she leaves.” 

“And what are we to talk about in the meantime?” John scoffed.

“Saw a squirrel fighting a bird for a bit of biscuit on someone’s lawn this morning,” Roger said. “How about that?” 

John thought for a moment, then nodded. “Who won?” 

Before Roger could reply, your mother swooped back in, Brian and Chrissie right behind her. 

“So, Y/N, I am being treated to a girls’ day out!” she squealed happily. 

Brian rolled his eyes, and shot you a sympathetic look.

“Now, I just wanted to address...” she continued. “I mean, well. It’s for girls, and you...technically...I mean you are, or were, but you are and aren’t and um. I don’t want you to feel bad that you aren’t coming with, you know, but...I mean, if we were designating it by what’s in our pants, it might be different, and-” 

You had never witnessed a shared group look of terror, but it was a hell of a thing to see as it enveloped everyone, as it dawned on them what she was trying to say. 

“Y/N is a part of our uh...call it a lads’ day in,” John interrupted before she could blather any more. “Also, part of tour prep as a member of the road crew.” 

You nodded, fighting off the anxiety attack threatening to break forth. 

“So no need for apologies or worries or anything else,” Roger added. “You’re doing your thing, having your day, and he’s here with us having his, all is well.” 

“I know, but-” your mother started. 

“If you’re worried about the boys keeping busy and entertained,” Chrissie interrupted. “Don’t. They keep each other plenty busy, don’t you all?” 

As you nodded with the rest of the guys, you wished you could thank her now for taking your mother head on like she was. She certainly was under no obligation to do so, but she had, and it was the kindest gift she could have given you, someone she barely knew. 

Your mother opened her mouth yet again, but Brian didn’t let her get a syllable out. 

“You know, we have a cat! Y/N mentioned you like cats. Squeaky is out in the garden, you ought to go meet her.” 

“That is a wonderful idea,” Chrissie agreed, bouncing up on her feet to give him a kiss before gently but steadily taking your mother by the arm and leading her out to the garden. 

As she left, the tension in the room went with her. 

“Right, so the squirrel won,” Roger said. “But back to Deacy’s questions, and I’ll echo one of them as politely as I can: what in the fuck is her problem?” 

You laughed. You couldn’t help it; you’d reached a breaking point with the oddness of it all and how horrendous you feared it might turn the longer your mother was around. “You’re asking me?” 

Roger nodded.

“If I knew, I would have found a way to do something about it by now,” you continued. “Trust me. I’d love to say she would try therapy, or something to work on herself, but she won’t. So we’ll likely never have an answer to that question. And even if we did get one, she’d find a way to make it someone else’s fault. God, I have...years of stories, that rightfully no one wants to hear, of frustration and anger over dealing with her and the hurt I’ve hung onto and-scones! Are my favorite, I just can’t help myself around them.” 

Your mother walked back in just in time for the last sentence, and smirked. “I think they can see that. Y/N has always had a bit of a tummy, but you’re working on it now, right? You always said you wanted to slim down after you started all of-” 

She made a gesture towards her own chest and crotch. “That ‘stuff.’ Be a shame to waste all the hard work those doctors put in for you, all over a few extra cookies you couldn’t say no to. And not to mention the money you paid! My goodness-” 

A car horn honked outside, and Roger darted up to look out the window. “Ah! There’s my mum with the car. Looks like she picked up the rest of the ladies first too! Right on to shopping then, how exciting!” 

You wanted to laugh, because he sounded the exact opposite of excited for shopping, but bless him, he was putting in the work to try. 

“Let’s get moving!” Chrissie had one hand on your mother’s shoulder urging her to the front door, the other taking her purse from Brian as he handed it to her. “Usual rules, boys. No fist fights, no live munitions, no setting the house on fire, no overfeeding the cat! We’ll see you all later!” 

Brian laughed and shook his head as they left, but pulled her close for just a moment to whisper something to her. 

“If you don’t mind, can I ask what you told her?” you asked. “Told her to resist the urge to kill my mum?” 

“No,” Brian said. “Just told her to call if she should need us. Maybe could have tacked that on though.” 

“Chrissie wouldn’t get caught anyway,” Roger said. “She’s a smart woman.” 

“I can’t decide if that’s reassuring or not, Rog,” Brian said with a slight frown. 

“Save you the decision, it is,” Roger replied. “Now. Y/N, you mentioned stories. Let’s hear them. The first ever Queen therapy brunch has officially begun, and we won’t even charge you.” 

You laughed, but shrugged. “Are you guys sure you want to hear all this? You don’t have to let me vent, and it’s probably not healthy to do it this way...” 

“You’re in a safe place, and we’re giving you permission to vent to us,” Brian said. “Go for it.” 

“We’ll need tea,” Freddie fretted. “What’s out here has gone cold, Brian-” 

“I’ve got it,” Brian smiled. “I’ll put some on, you all get started. If you talk loud enough, Y/N, I can hear you from the kitchen.” 

“I...I don’t know where to start,” you hesitated. “No one has ever really let me just...talk about it. I mean, looking back, there were days where she was my hero. She taught me to be kind, to love others, to treat people and animals well and with respect. She would do nice things for me, like make my favorite dinner or buy me a toy.” 

They all nodded, and it was both odd and nice to have people clearly listening and caring. 

“Then other days...she was a nightmare. I was honestly terrified of her. She never laid a hand on me, but she didn’t have to. When she got mad or frustrated or felt I’d done something wrong, and some days mind you, I couldn’t do anything right in her eyes...I’d always fear she would finally hit me. I still do, sometimes. But the yelling was enough. Some days it was just shaming and lecturing. But it always makes me feel lesser. Like I’m not human enough. Or like I’m too much to deal with to be around anyone.” 

Their soft smiles at your opening up had faded, replaced with winces and looks of horror. 

“Y/N...” Freddie said softly. “How long have you been hanging onto all this?” 

“Does it matter?” you shrugged. “She’ll never apologize for any of it. She doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong. Ask her about today, and I guarantee you, she won’t see that she did anything wrong with how she’s acted. This is how it’s always been, and probably always will be whenever she’s around. It’s so...heavy. I’ve been carrying her whenever she needed carrying, in addition to holding myself up, and my back has broken from it so many times already...but it doesn’t ever matter. I get back up, and I keep going forward, because that’s what I’ve always done.” 

“This isn’t right,” John said, an undercurrent of anger in his voice, even as he gently took a cup of tea from Brian, who was playing waiter as he handed them out. “I want to talk to her.” 

“I appreciate that,” you said quickly. “But you wouldn’t be the first. Some of my doctors tried. Stayed up late, due to the time difference, and called her all the way from Europe, while I was over here for all my transitioning things. She played along long enough to placate them, then yelled at me later saying they made her feel like a bad mother.” 

You threw up your hands. “And the worst bit? Today was a relatively tame day for her. Roger knows it, he got the brunt of a bad day with her last night.” 

Roger nodded. “Would you like to know how the rest of our conversation went last night, while you and Freddie were out getting dinner?” 

You winced. “Yes, and no?” 

“Very well,” Roger said. “I was trying to talk to her more about how much you’d enjoyed the Tate, and how happy you were here, how happy you make Freddie, how happy he makes you. Trying to get her to see things from your perspective, to help her worry less, you know?” 

“Thank you,” you said.

“Well, don’t thank me, because it didn’t work,” Roger scoffed, and grabbed another full flute to sip from. “She started going on about ‘what about her, and her feelings, and I could never understand how she feels and we don’t know you well enough to really get it all’ and I-” 

He took another sip. “I admit, I got upset on your behalf. I reminded her that you’re an adult, and you deserve to go out and live your life as you want. She claimed not to disagree with that, but then immediately did by saying she felt you needed her close by, and how could she do that with you out here.” 

“And that’s how you got to talking about your mum and how she parented you, and my mum insulting her,” you said. “Jesus. I’m sorry, Rog.” 

“Don’t be sorry, you’ve done nothing wrong!” Roger replied. “She should be sorry, but like you said...she doesn’t seem the apologizing type.” 

“I’ve never been so glad to have such a variety of scones,” you murmured. 

“Scones and tea will ease the pain,” Freddie joked. “Or at least, give you something to do besides worry about her.” 

“How could you tell?” you asked. 

“Just a feeling,” Freddie said. “And the look on your face. Like you’ve been force-fed rancid food or something. You only do that when you’re worrying yourself into a panic.” 

“I could never play poker,” you sighed, and there was a beat before they burst into laughter. 

“That is...the oddest thing to say after all of this,” John said, shaking his head. “I like it. Good on you for it, you can still laugh. That’s something you have over her, you know.” 

You nodded. “I suppose it is. Not much, but-” 

“No,” Freddie said, and took your hands in his. “Anything you have over her, is something. Is important. Is special. And you have more than you know, because you’re doing all these things she either couldn’t or wouldn’t do. You’re trying to be happy, to live life the way you want. To travel, to take risks, to do what you love doing. But she, to me, seems she will always be stuck mentally just where she is: unhappy with what she didn’t do, but unwilling to make any changes for herself, and putting the blame elsewhere.” 

There were tears at the edges of his eyes, and you sighed shakily. “Don’t you cry, I’ll start then.” 

Brian raised a hand to catch your eye, and you turned to him. “Sorry. Already on that train. My parents weren’t perfect, but...I think I need to take them out to dinner, or something, soon. Have them over for a night or something.” 

Roger and John were in similar straits, eyes red, sniffling quietly. 

You let the tears fall as Freddie pulled you close for a hug, and smiled as you watched him wipe away tears of his own after he let you go. 

“Lord. What a mess I’ve made of us,” you tutted. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry,” Brian said. “You’re a part of this weird little family, whether you like it or not.” 

Roger nodded. “Means we care about you, and whatever bullshit is getting you down, and we’re here for you. You’ll have to get used to that before the next tour starts, you know.” 

“I can try,” you said with a soft and shaky laugh. 

“That’s all we ask,” John said. “Also, that you eat some more. God, this is almost too much food.” 

“We can send everyone home with leftovers,” Brian said. “Enough that we might get away with minimal grocery buying before the tour starts. No worries about any extra going to waste while we’re gone, for once.” 

“What a mix,” Freddie laughed. “We’ve got Indian at home, now a full English breakfast...” 

“Home?” John asked, an eyebrow raised. “Rog thought you might be telling me about this soon. Should I take it you’ve decided to stay with Fred?” 

You nodded happily, the tears drying as you settled into it, the new connection and comfort you had with all of them. “I have. Let the tenants in that other flat do whatever they want. I’ve got my home.” 

“With a fridge that might run out of room,” Freddie said with a sigh. 

“We’ll figure it out,” you said. “Or eat bigger meals.” 

“How utterly domestic,” Roger smiled. “Look at you two! But I like seeing it. And so help me, if your mother tries to go back to your flat, I will-” 

The phone rang, and silence fell. 

#text post #LeeH writes #queen band fic #freddie mercury x reader #freddie mercury x male reader