#Caleb just noticed Essek showed up

[gaawachan]

Trent Ikithon, joke villain

Spoilers ahead obviously

Can I just say that I found Trent's threat about Essek and him having to wait for Caleb in Blumenthal overnight weirdly hilarious, and not just because he's almost certainly years behind the news?

Trent leaving message: "hahaha, I'm going to tell the Bright Queen Essek was the traitor, Caleb" *casts* "Your Majesty, I- "42 psychic damage*"

Trent builds his trap in Blumenthal and hides behind a tree: "Okay, any minute... now.... any minute now... might as well cast Sending to the Bright Queen again while I wai- *27 psychic damage*"

*hours later*

Trent: "he's not coming tonight, is he? I've been hiding behind this tree all evening and my whole body hurts and I have a killer headache ... Well, let's try sending agai- *34 psychic damage* *passes out behind tree*"

.

I genuinely find it hard to believe that he deserves the Int stat he has, lol.

#critrole spoilers #critical role #caleb widogast #essek #essek thelyss #trent ikithon #spoilers #critical role spoilers #mighty nein #he's so pathetic #why is he so stupid #every time he shows up he just does the dumbest shit #but because he's horrifying no one seems to notice #Trent Ikithon is a moron

[essekthelysssideblog]

The T-Dock is destroyed. Caleb grieves. Essek holds him. It’s safe.

What an unexpected notion that is. But it’s true. In the past month, in the depths of Aeor, things have relaxed, between them. They still speak in riddles, because that is who they are, but the tension is gone. They speak of their respective plans for the future, and Essek is supportive of his tentative musings about teaching, and Caleb warms Essek’s hands in his own when they become too cold.

And now, their time in Aeor is over. They are saying their goodbyes. They have done what they came to do.

Essek hesitates. “I know you said you did not wish for me to be in Rexxentrum while the trial was taking place,” he begins slowly. Caleb swallows; he had been surprised to receive a Sending from Essek not one full day past his departure from the Blooming Grove, and then precisely once a week since. It had been something to look forward to, in the depths of the trial, but Caleb had indeed declined Essek’s offer to visit, back then. Better to know that Essek was as far away from that man and all the messiness associated with him as possible.

“But,” Essek continues, “if it is over, now… perhaps I could visit your home, when it is safe to do so?”

“Oh,” Caleb says. The offer meant much over a Sending, when Caleb recalled the fear and loathing on Essek’s face at the mention of his old Master. But now, after a month alone together in Aeor, and the increased familiarity between them, the question carried a much different weight to it. Lighter, and more pleasant, but of no less significance. “Of course. I would like that, very much.”

There is no worry in his mind that either of them have misunderstood their intentions. Caleb isn’t yet sure what the shape of this will be, but he has seen Essek’s ears twitch when their hands touch, and he knows that Essek has noticed the way his eyes drift towards him all too often. They have always been very good at reading each other and reveling in the ambiguities; this feels no different.

“I would as well,” Essek says, bowing his head politely. He waits a moment, then raises his hands in the first motions of the Teleport spell.

“Ah, Essek,” Caleb says quickly, extending a hand out to his forearm. Essek pauses, his lip quirking up into a half grin, as if he anticipated the interruption and is teasing Caleb about his predictability. 

“Yes?” He asks patiently.

“It’s just something that Beau told me. A few weeks ago, now.” His hand fiddles with the Sending stone in his pocket; the one he had commissioned right after the trial’s conclusion. “She said– I was telling her about our trip, and that I was enjoying it very much.” This is true; Caleb is leaving out the part where he had fretted to her about how uncomfortable that had made him, at first. How anxiously he had waited for things to go wrong. “She told me that that was a good thing.”

Essek cocks his head. Slightly confused, but he will allow Caleb his strangeness. “Indeed,” he offers. “I enjoyed myself as well.”

“Ja,” Caleb agrees. Then he bites his lip, and adds: “This is a good thing, you and I.”

And now Essek’s mask melts, revealing the surprised fondness that is so near the surface, these days, the expression that Caleb saw the first time when he kissed the man’s cheek. “Caleb Widogast,” he says thickly. He licks his lips. Meets Caleb’s eyes for a moment, then looks away just as quickly. “I want it to be. Very much.”

He says it like a confession. Between them, it may as well be. Caleb wraps him in a hug, cupping the back of his head with one hand. “Come to my home when you can,” he says near Essek’s ear. “I will show you around.”

“I will look forward to it,” Essek murmurs.

Caleb backs away just enough to have space to kiss Essek’s cheek again. Essek looks back at him with undisguised affection across his face. “I will miss you,” Caleb says, and Essek smiles at him, gentle.

“I as well, Caleb Widogast,” he says, and this time, when he casts the Teleport spell, Caleb lets him go.

#shadowgast #critical role #mine #essek thelyss #caleb widogast #i have a series of ficlets in my head that is just 'the wizards start dating each other without either of them saying it' #and this is the first one

[otdderamin]

Analysis: Essek's Accent As The Shadowhand Fades

I'm watching the Essek Supercut again, and I noticed Essek's accent and when it starts to settle.

Watch the first few clips, until about about 0:4:40

Mostly this is just Matt settling into Essek's voice, but when he was first introduced, Essek had a very stern authoritative court voice. But once they were in the antichamber together, and Fjord says they need to check their underwear for accidents after that first interaction with the Queen and made him laugh, Essek slips into what we hear as his personal accent.

Essek really did just make up this version of himself to be as successful as everyone pushed him to be, and make really selfish choices to protect that act. But those personas ultimately felt like lies about himself. So what difference does it make protecting it with more lies? Which led himself down some really dark paths until Thw Mighty Nein discovered him and it all unraveled.

Essek is a dramatic theater gay who pulled off a character so well he couldn't stop playing him even when it was turning into a Shakespearean tragedy. Everything he says in these early days is so intensely dramatic and selling his vast accomplishments. Essek is giving them a list of reasons to respect him because he doesn't think his inner self is respectable. Essek always felt like it was the lies people loved and not him underneath, so what would hurt people more would be trying to stop. To be anything less than ruthless.

But this bunch of goofballs, whose very first direct comment to him was a self-depricating joke about being scared, they broke through. And what broke his heart most on that ship, was knowing he'd let them down with those lies. Because he'd let them see his true self, like he hadn't done for anyone in years (decades?), and they loved that one the most. Especially Caleb because they'd shared that instant attraction and interest Essek almost wasn't sure he could feel.

So after he was caught, even if Caleb was telling Essek he could choose to be better, he was obviously hurt and mistrustful and not calling. And feeling like he couldn't go back ate at him.

But then The Mighty Nein call on him again for help with their more dangerous thing ever. These weirdos are going to run headlong into danger not for gain or glory but because it stops someone else making a catastrophic mistake. And they want him to come with them. They want him to show them he's changed. And he has.

And even if they fight it, that attraction is still like magnets. They're so scared of hurting each other again or getting hurt, they can talk in meaningful coded riddles with each other, but not dare cross the threshold where they can hold that pull back. Where they'd have to find out if they enable or temper their worst impulses.

They didn't get there before they parted ways after Aeor. But we know that sometime in the last six months they let themselves pull together. They go back to Aeor to know what it feels like to just be together, the two of them, if no one at all was there. Caleb, down on one knee, holding a magic ring, "[Essek Thelyss], I know we're not relationship people, but will you date me for three months, and then we'll reassess?"

And it worked. Maybe being apart much of the time helps them get perspective on the world outside themselves and the freedom to lead two very different lives. The Essek who visits the man with green beans, no longer sounds quite like the Shadowhand did. He found how to use his power in the world more responsibly, when only a handful of people will hear about it, but they will listen so much closer, and see him more than any accomplishment. With the bustle and fear of the world shut out.

#Critical Role #essek thelyss #the mighty nein reunited #Shadowgast #Critical role meta #critical role analysis #analysis #Youtube

[aeor-is-for-reccing]

Shadowgast Recs: Featuring Astrid or Eadwulf

This week we have nine recs for fics that feature Astrid and/or Eadwulf behind the cut! Don't forget to comment or kudos on the stories!

Hard Mouth by road_rhythm (216254,Explicit) Warnings: Generally dark, torture, author chose not to warn.

While the Nein are in Aeor, Trent uses the dream spell to invade Caleb's mind. Things get worse from there.

Reccer says: The writing is extremely vivid and the story engrossing, but I also adore this version of Astrid

More Things than Heaven and Earth by kaeda (76998,Mature) Warnings: None

Caleb and Essek find themselves transported to what appears to be the plot of Tusk Love.

Reccer says: The fic starts off as a romp but consistently chooses to allow all of the characters a surprising amount of depth. Features a great Astrid and Eadwulf

Neighborhood Watch by timbrene (2800,Teen) Warnings: None!

Astrid notices a disguised Essek has set up residence at Caleb's home and sets out to investigate what he could be plotting.

Reccer says: Astrid and Eadwulf are both perfect in this, especially Astrid; her certainty that "Bren" is getting manipulated by this Dynasty elf who's definitely a threat to national security is such a funny messed-up Volstrecker twist on being concerned for your friend. It's heartwarming and will put a smile on your face.

look forward lest the past catch up by iniquiticity (11328,Explicit) Warnings: None

Astrid saves Essek from an assassination attempt, leaving him with a newfound appreciation for his own life.

Reccer says: There's just something about a near death experience that makes you want to go desperately make out with your sort of boyfriend, and this fic really captured that.

do you have enough love in your heart, to go and get your hands dirty? by SaltCore (4355,Mature) Warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence (offensive dunamancy), mentions of torture

Getting Bren out of a tight spot forced you into uncomfortable company, Astrid. As his friend heals him, take a little time to think about one member of the Mighty Nein, the one who helped, the one you trust the least.

Reccer says: This is a beautiful example of the "Astrid and Essek hissing at each other like angry cats because they're both concerned about Caleb" genre. The prose is gorgeous and very vivid, Astrid's POV is cutting and feels so much like her. All the characters are perfect. Highly recommend it.

you are what we could've been by vagabondfirelilly (2744,General) Warnings: None

Caleb lets it slip that he is married to Essek, while in the presence of his former lovers.

Reccer says: Very bittersweet, it's lovely to think about Caleb and Essek being married, but between the fic being written from Eadwulf's perspective, and the reaction this revelation illicits from Astrid, there's a real sense of pain and loss from what could've been.

The Annual Rexxentrum Cat Show by hanap (776,Teen) Warnings: None

Four wizards engage in many shenanigans to try winning the prestigious Annual Rexxentrum Cat Show.

Reccer says: It's fun! All four of this group really show off their wizardly competitive spirit in this fic, and it's a delight to read.

Cultivate a space for the things that hurt you most by PryingBlackbird (102212,Mature) Warnings: Main-character death (gets resurrected), Trent Ikithon, Blumenkids backstory

Astrid, Caleb, Eadwulf and Essek are complicated people who each battle their own demons. Their pahths keep crossing during this alternate retelling of late C2.

Reccer says: It creates a narrative of late C2 that features Astrid and Wulf more heavily and also has some nice Shadowgast slowburn. Also so much angst. The ending is a good one and a bit different from the campaign.

I'd hate to put us up against yesterday by joldiego (1485,Teen) Warnings: Feeblemind

Caleb and Essek show up at Astrid's place badly hurt; Essek under feeblemind

Reccer says: It's a very promising start, and I love the Astrid point of view

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast.Have any questions about what this is?

Check out the FAQ! Next week’s theme is Wild Magic!

#Critical Role #Shadowgast #essek thelyss #Caleb Widogast #astrid beck #Eadwulf Grieve #CR fic #Critical Role Fic #Fanfic Recs #CR Fic recs

[luolands]

Essek's appearance

Twitter: (re: Essek's eye color) I always imagined a violet or violet-blue color, myself.

c2e74: Now who you see arrived at the front. A male drow, short white hair, a perpetual soft smile, a similar mantle of armor to the soldiers that you saw exterior, but beneath it, a cloak of dark purple just drifts below and obscures the entirety of his body.

Reunited, pt 2: Right as he crosses the threshold, the illusion fades, and you see the light lavender skin and white hair of Essek. 

c2e136: Now, the reason it takes half your movement, though he's a relatively light individual, you're both waterlogged.

Wrap-up: (re: Verin) He's the younger, taller, the more athletic brother of the family.

c2e57: You can see his footfalls. He's not floating through the city, but he walks with such a grace and a very direct gait that there is no bobbing, he just seems to glide forward. Travis: It's that Tomb of the Unknown Soldier glide, man Matt: Yeah, straight-up.

c2e57: The Bright Queen nods towards you and glances over towards one of the nearby male drow figures sitting to the right of the dais. Very handsome, head held high, looking down upon this with a curious glance. A similar mantle to what you noticed Lythir wearing, but much more elaborate. You can see the robes that he's wearing that pretty much entirely obscure the body. They just fall, they go entirely around the mantle and close in the front so it's this beautiful, draped, deep purple and black robe that completely obfuscates the body.

c2e91: He removes the mantle and sets it on one of the chairs in the foyer area of the Xhorhaus and he's dressed in nice, comfortable clothes, well-trimmed. It's actually not too different from your (Caleb's) Xhorhasian outfit as you had it tailored, the design of which you requested is loosely based on similar designs you've seen around the city and his is more of a designer version of that, but comfortable and sleek.

c2e124: He takes his mantle off and pulls the sides of the robe away and you can see he has an undershirt, it's a sleeveless undershirt, of like a darker gray silk. And he begins to show his arms and reveal.. he's being modest with it, doing it in places, so he's not just full on baring it all here, but he's giving a fairly thorough glance.

Matt, c2e91: They are very, very well kept, soft feet from a man who takes care of himself in the nobility. Sure, there you go.

Beau, c2e97: (looking at Dezran Thain) I want to see if he's hiding anything on his belt. If he looks like he has any papers or anything. A weapon or something like that. Matt: Go ahead and make a perception check for me. Jester: I'm going to look at his butt while she's doing that. Matt: ..make a perception check for me. (8, 8!) You both.. find the butt. It's not a bad butt, but that's about all you discern.

c2e124: You see the familiar white, short hair, odd grin, and now a heavy white-fur collared long, purple-black cloak, as the Shadowhand, Essek Thelyss drifts towards you.

#essek thelyss #essek #verin #verin thelyss #kryn dynasty #beau #beauregard lionett #jester #jester lavorre #critical role #crit role #mighty nein #the mighty nein #c2 #campaign 2 #cr campaign 2 #ref

[morthyew]

shadowgast headcanons

in the many years caleb and essek travel together through aeor, the extradimensional tower no doubt truly becomes a home to them, a melding of their lives, no matter how gracious, courteous, and personally reserved as they may be with how they share the space.

a guest for even six months is no longer truly a guest. i imagine the vast majority of their tome is spent together in study, but the amount of casual magic in that home, especially as they got comfortable with each other, would truly be astounding.

nested extradimensional pockets to organize spell components, dabbling in metamagic simply for fun, creating increasingly intricate and elaborate expressions of cantrips, switching magical aesthetics for a day just to surprise one another, the possibilities are endless.

essek’s purple clothes are covered in cat hair, and even if frumpkin starts the night curled up with caleb, he’s curled up in essek’s lap once he eventually settles down to meditate. he doesn’t mind the levitation, and essek doesn’t notice it’s happening until it’s far too late to dissuade him.

caleb reverse engineers the levitating glide behind essek’s back and springs it on him one morning to show off. it starts an arms race of mastering each other’s specialities, and with the notable arcane advantage in the levels essek has on caleb, caleb acknowledges, laughing, after a while that he may have poked the bear a bit soon for him to impress essek. essek replies that he’s always impressed by caleb and no doubt they smile at each other in silence for an unconscionaby long period of time.

they absolutely develop an entire nonverbal style of communication, only speaking because they want to, to pass the time, or to talk about magic. their shared workspace (they no doubt each have at least four: one separate each, one shared, and one for volatile experimentation by either) is neat and covered in papers and organized and chaotic and incomprehensible to anyone and perfectly legible to them.

if you know any couple who have higher ed degrees in the same field, it’s very similar. they try not to but they rapidly completely forget what the baseline level of arcane knowledge for any normal person is. they encounter a sixth-level abjurer and accidentally talk theory ten levels above them like it’s cantrips. they have strong opinions about the places where their theoretical approaches differ, and any arguments may suddenly veer wildly into arguments on theory.

i feel like they do have such deep respect and affection for one another that they rapidly become so aware of one another’s boundaries that lines simply aren’t crossed anymore. they need to undress in the same room for some reason and caleb simply turns away while essek removes his clothes down to his undertunic, and it’s a non-issue.

they also have long, in-depth conversations about morality whenever one of them has a trauma nightmare or reminder. neither of them have many answers or even many words at some times, but they talk and talk and talk about what is right and how someone can know what is right, how shame warps people, how regret is impossible to let go of. it’s always very late at night over food or a drink, and they never dwell on it long after that conversation.

they’re happy, for the time they have, even though they always know it won’t last. they also have the slowest jane austen slow burn while also seeming always on the verge of a first kiss while also like they’re recently amicably divorced but still in love with each other.

#cr #shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek theyless

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

Caleb is heavily focused on the papers in front of him, barely noticing the time or his surroundings until there’s a nip at his ear. He whips to look and sees U’nef, Essek’s bat familiar, flitting about his head. He sighs, dragging a hand down his face. He adores Essek, but gods his familiar certainly...takes getting used to.

U’nef chirps incessantly, flapping around Caleb’s head, occasionally hitting Caleb’s head with her wings until he rises with a groan, “Ja, Ja, I get the message.”

The bat coming to get him means only one thing, she’s very unhappy with something Essek is doing. Usually it means she’s not been getting enough attention.

As Caleb, followed by U’nef, walks into the living room, he sees the source of her distress immediately. Essek is fast asleep on the couch, his neck propped up at a bad angle, tea cup still steaming in front of him. Caleb feels U’nef land on his shoulder, which he ignores.

“Liebling,” Caleb sits on the arm of the couch and reaches over to shake Essek gently. He must be very tired to have actually fallen asleep by himself and on the couch no less. It’s honestly a shame that Caleb can’t carry him himself. “Essek, wake up, Shatz.”

Essek groans softly, blinking and looking over at Caleb, his eyes softening at the sight of him and then U’nef, “Hello.”

Caleb chuckles and reaches out to brush his hair from his face, “U’nef was very upset about you falling asleep here.”

Essek chuckles and yawns. U’nef, ever loyal, flits over to Essek, hanging upside down from his ear as always. “I suppose the both of you are trying to tell me to go to bed?”

“Ja, I believe so. Come on, liebling.” Caleb helps Essek to his feet and the two of them pad into their bedroom. The second they cross the threshold, U’nef flies up to the rafters and the little perch Essek made for her.

Caleb sighs, “One day she’ll actually like me.”

Essek chuckles, patting his chest, “She does, she just has a...peculiar way of showing it.”

Caleb gives his partner a wry look, “Certainly. Is that why she keeps biting my ears?”

“It’s not her fault you don’t pay attention to her otherwise,” Essek points out as he crawls into bed. “Or that you don’t ever share any of your mango with her.”

“She steals it before I can even offer it,” Caleb mutters, “not that she even needs to eat.” With a wave of his hand, he darkens the room. “Good night, liebling.”

“Is that your way of telling me to be quiet?” Essek chuckles wryly.

“Guten Nacht, U’nef,” Caleb calls up. The only reply is a truly awful series of chittering.

#my fic #critical role #shadowgast #mighty nein

[spottedenchants]

Hey chanse, hope this isn't too weird but I just wanted to thank you for the touching sentiments series. Fandom is really good for finding fic with aspec perspectives and I've noticed essek/sg fic has a lot of it even compared to that. But I've never read anything like ts and it means a lot to me. I've been thinking lately about relationship dynamics as performances, and if you use that metaphor, a QPR is a performance of some really obscure play that I keep hearing about and it sounds SO good but i cant imagine how it would actually look, much less see myself as an actor in a production. And especially with your most recent two fics-- there is such intimacy between both Essek and Jester and essek and Caleb in these different ways, and at the same time, even when essek and Caleb straight up have sex, Essek is still at the same place on the ace/aro spectrum the whole time and it's just. Really nice to see, if that makes sense. I've read aromantic/asexual/QPR stories where sex and romance are just not on the table at all, and while those are great it's really comforting to see a story that blurs the lines even deeper than that. Not to get too serious about it, but it's so hard realizing you're gonna spend a lot of your life trying to write your own relationship blueprints, and I really can't emphasize enough what a comfort it is to know that someone else has thought about it enough to be able to write it out the way you have, and I'm really really grateful for it.

Hi hi! If a ‘thank you’ is weird, then I give you an equally weird ‘thank you for reading’ right back :3

(got rambly so the rest is under the cut xD)

I've definitely found fandom to be an excellent place to engage with aspec stories and feel very lucky to have found a corner where they feel not only accepted, but celebrated in good faith, and I am touched (ha :D) that Touching Sentiments has found a unique place in your mind and heart! 💜

As far as I’ve personally read (though tbf I have not read nearly as much published aspec fiction as I would like), I definitely get what you mean about the yes/no dichotomies of sex and romance that often show up in stories with aspec characters. ‘No’ is a lived truth for a lot more people than pop culture tends to imply, aspec or not, and I heartily agree that it’s very cool to see in print and on screen that ‘no, never’ is an option in the first place. :D It also has the benefit of being a very convenient shorthand to express a character’s orientation in a self-contained story that isn’t About their orientation, but also I get what you mean about wanting to see the lines blurred with ‘maybe’ more often. (Though that can get tangled in the whole ‘aces/aros can still conform to amatonormative standards’ side of things, which I really don’t have a solution for other than continuing to write and engage with aspec stuff, cause it’s hard to have a spectrum with only two points and getting multiple perspectives is the only way I really know how to build it out).

That’s definitely one of the reasons why I’ve found fanfic to be such a cool medium to write in- there’s soooo much room to really dig into nitty gritty details that a fixed story might not have the same space for! What is romance, what is sex, what is care, what is intimacy, what is love? *cue the music* We’re throwing out the dictionary here and writing our own so that everyone’s on the same page. >:3

I don’t have the bulk of these things posted yet, but TS!Essek’s intimacy with each of the Nein is very important to me and all of it is for sure flavored by his sexuality, and I am Thrilled that you've found him to be consistent!! I don't necessarily think TS goes deeper than other explorations in which the characters in question discuss or display their feelings around sex and romance, especially in the the fanfic scene, I’ve just published quite a lot of it and am reaping the benefits of breadth; no single TS fic needs to be everything or display every facet of him, it just needs to be whatever sliver it is. :3 (also I Do have a few cr fic recs (mostly sg) off the top of my head that dig into those lines of intimate conversation if you are interested :D)

As for relationships as performances! That is a lovely metaphor and I entirely understand what you mean, same hat and everything xD In some ways, I consider TS to be a very informal study log/synthesis paper on exactly that, and the script has just gotten more nuanced as I go xD That said, if you or anyone else is interested in the sorts of things I’ve researched to build the flavor of TS!Essek’s relationships with the Nein, I recommend searching up ‘relationship anarchy’ and ‘queerplatonic relationships’ specifically for further means of describing interpersonal relationships outside of the framework of amatonormativity, and then ‘loveless aromantic’ and ‘lovequeer’ for conversations about varying definitions of love and its applications both as a term and a concept.

I’ve also found pre-written/referenceable materials like Relationship Anarchy Smorgasbords and Yes No Maybe lists to be very helpful with relationship blueprints, too. The latter are often about the expression of sexuality as a whole, and they involve individualized thresholds of things ranging from states of dress to preferred anatomical terms to hygiene to safety to what is/isn’t deemed sexual, and other such points of emotional and physical intimacy as well. (Also I recommend Scarleteen just in general. very useful very informative very comprehensive groundwork)

I am sososo heartened to know you’ve found so much comfort in TS 🥺 It’s been almost three years since I started writing, period, and I am very glad my writing has been received with such grace and patience. Thank you for sharing your enthusiasm with me! I hope you continue to find stories that speak to you, and am grateful you've allowed mine to be a part 💜

#words!!! #words words yay #i could talk for a While about the intricacies of ts!essek's sexuality as i've carved it out so far #almost did here but it would have been Quite a digression xD #orientation and expression and identity and and and #people are all so intricate and unique #it's fascinating #he is a vessel of investigation and discovery #ALSO if you or anyone has recs for aspec fiction please gimme i wanna read them #talesofsymphoniac #chanswers

[neinofthem]

Hi! Just found your blog and you seem to know your stuff so I'd like your opinion in this thing I've been thinking about:

(FYI: I just finished c2 like a week ago)

One thing about widowgast is that if they both got consecuted they could literally be together forever, but we know they're not getting consecuted because they're men of science, and that adds a tasty layer of tragic to the whole thing.

But these are the men who actually invented the spell that turns you into another humanoid race forever... And I can see Essek showing up one day without notice... Just being a human. What do you think?

hi! so glad to have you! uhhhhh i honestly can’t see that happening, i feel like essek is too like. mentally ill. to even consider actually attempting to solve his problems i think he just lives for decades with a pit of dread in his stomach until caleb finally kicks it and then he makes a choice.

#hi!!!!!!!!!!! #tw suicide #essek thelyss #critical role #cr #the mighty nein #tm9 #cr2 #shadowgast #caleb widogast

[marymauk]

Marymauk fic recs: Post-canon Essek things

It's all basically canon compliant. Sorta. Almost. Look, let me have that last one, okay? Also a few of them are actually more about Caleb. Shhh.

Paperback Romance by EscWizard (Esc), T, 5k, Shadowgast

There had been rumours about his and Caleb's sordid love affair since long before it was technically true. Essek was simply... playing into them a little, to help his defection go a little more smoothly. Rosohna would gossip about it for a few months, and then the rumour mill would move on, as it always does.

(it doesn't).

Or: how Essek and Caleb accidentally inspired (at least) a few dozen smut novels.

As funny as you might expect, with a surprisingly heartfelt Verin moment in the middle.

The Climb by Chekhov, T, 6k, Shadowgast

It’s... the stupidest thing.

Essek grits his teeth. It’s a trained habit - a way to redirect some of the pain without showing any symptoms. A Shadowhand never shows his hand, and it is this he excels at - a poker face, a well-concealed illusion of poise and grandeur and tolerance.

But today, he is unlucky.

Because there is little that escapes the keen mind of Widogast - and here he has quite the disadvantage.

It is, quite literally, his least favored terrain.

Stairs.

The mortifying ordeal of walking up a set of stairs. The ending Killed me. I'm dead.

path of the traveled sun by mousecookie, G, 6k, Essek and Verin

The baby chews on the ring and considers Verin with doleful sea-green eyes.

"She is teething,” Essek reports, and the way he says it reminds Verin of the days Essek was still memorizing arcane fundamentals. “I am told that the lower tusks are particularly discomforting in their early stages, even when they are milk teeth."

“Understandable,” Verin replies. He feels mentally adrift, like he’s stepped into an alternate universe, one where his aloof brother has been replaced by this warm, doting double.

Just some good Essek and Verin conversation feat. a Fjorester baby

come in from the storm by hanap, T, 3k, Shadowgast

“I haven’t heard from him in a while,” Caleb admits.

It has been nineteen days, eight hours, and forty-five minutes, to be precise.

The knot of worry that seems to be permanently lodged in his chest these days coils a little tighter.

The wizards have had an argument about whos turn it is to feed the cats. Is this the end?

Pastries and Paradise by Professor_Rye, G, 1k, Jester and Essek

For their weekly Bakery Vacation, Essek takes Jester to a famous Tal'dorei bakery. This time though, he has something to show her. Now if only she'd notice.

Jester and Essek my beloveds

Living a Nightmare, Chasing a Dream by Professor_Rye, T, 7k, Shadowgast

Caleb is in the middle of class when his husband sends him a desperate message. He's hurt, he's confused, and he has no idea where he is. Caleb and the Nein are now racing against the clock to try to find where Essek might be, and to get to him before his assassins do.

Gratuitous use of the word "husband"

Lay Your Bones by LadyOrpheus, T, 53k, Shadowgast, the Mighty Nein, and Verin Thelyss

Footsteps pad down the hall and past the stairs. Actual footsteps. Verin can’t remember the last time he saw Essek walk on his own two feet. He feels a twisted knot form beneath his sternum; something isn’t right.

Thinking only of justice and restoring his family's honor after Essek's betrayal, Verin Thelyss finds something he never expected, an Essek he never expected. A mission for justice turns into a race against time and a family finds their world upended.

Aaaaa this fic!! Listen, basically, I love it...

#wow.. suprising absolutely no one: lotsa essek fics out there folks #m9 #essek thelyss #shadowgast #critical role #fic recs #my post

[ziirux]

I was tagged by @holytomfoolery !! This reminds me of those tag games on deviantart waaaay back in the day, so sure why the heck not

3 ships:

I of course have to start with Caleb Widogast and Essek Thelyss from Critical Role campaign 2, I can lose my mind over that ship at a moment's notice (what's sexier than wizards? nothing!), for number two I'll say Ulrich and Yumi from Code Lyoko as I've been having brainworms for that show again (see below) aaaand finally for number three let's go with Callum and Rayla from the Dragon Prince!

First ever ship:

man I have to say I haven't really thought about this but considering that the media I consumed as a youngin' was cartoons my best guess would be Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable

Last song:

Last movie:

just recently watched the second sonic movie and it was good fun for sure!!

Currently reading:

been fighting to make my way through Robin Hobb's Dragon Keeper (I mean I have actually really enjoyed it!!), I have like 50 pages left but for me it's either that I can't put a book down or I can't pick one up and there's no in-between and currently I'm unable to pick the damn book back up

Watching:

been rewatching Code Lyoko from the beginning once again because I'm obligated to revisit my favourites regularly and it's just that time of the year I guess and this show especially has a special place in my heart because it still slaps so hard even after fifteen years

Consuming:

cronching those limited edition seasonal chanterelle flavoured chips (they really nailed the flavour ngl)

Craving:

my next paycheck. and a raise

tagging @virensere and @nocturnal-halcyon if y'all want to do it!!

#tag game

[captainkingsley]

shadowidomauk but a Cyrano au ( except nobody dies and they end up as a poly trio instead because I control the narrative )

Molly and Essek both are in love with Caleb. Caleb spends most of his time focusing on his schooling. Essek is afraid Caleb will reject him and so he never says anything to him, meanwhile Molly catches Caleb's eye while he's performing one of his circus acts and Caleb attempts to pursue him.

The problem is that Caleb communicates mainly via letters, and Molly's... Not great at reading. Or writing flowery words. So he goes to Essek, and they hatch a plan that Molly will just spill all his feelings and Essek will write them, and they collaborate on the letters from 'Molly'. Essek definitely puts his own feelings in there, as well — which makes the letters that much more enticing to Caleb.

Molly eventually finds out about that, but rather than getting upset, he takes a long look at his situation with Essek and realizes that somewhere along the way, he's accidently fallen for him, too. It doesn't help that he's been hearing Caleb's affection read out loud by Essek, and oh no, he's in way too deep, now. And Essek realizes too that hearing Molly continually pour his heart out has made him experience some conflicting things.

Eventually, they come clean to Caleb, who...

Knew the whole time. Because he's Caleb, he's smart, he's able to pick apart which parts of the letters were from Molly, and which were from Essek. And his own letters, in turn, were worded just the right way to weave words of affection for both of them.

Molly's parts of the letters talk about how incredibly smart Caleb is, about how he does things Molly only wishes he could do — he hadn't had much schooling, see, and magic fascinates him. Essek, meanwhile, emphasizes Caleb's knack for understanding any concept, and how he wants to hear his theories and ideas about how the universe works. Sometimes the two perspectives show up in one letter, but neither would notice while writing together because they both felt it. There's also the mutual attraction that gets distracting, too.

And then they realize the wording of Caleb's letters, after he reads his newest, unsent one — how he compliments Mollymauk on his curiosity and his love of life, his desire to just feel alive. And Essek's intelligence, his way with words and the magic he's able to weave. How he talks about Essek's fascination with the stars alongside Molly's love of the moon, and they realize that all the star and moon metaphors scattered throughout the letters were about both of them.

See, Caleb's the sun to Molly and Essek's moon and stars, and they work perfectly alongside each other— so it's only fitting that the three of them wind up together like this.

#shadowidomauk #this is inspired by the fact that one of the songs came up on my Spotify #anyway this could be worded better but i am about to go pass out #going to be thinking about Caleb and Molly and Essek and the astrological imagery associated with them

[brenbrennn]

I'M FREE TO COMMENT!!!! My headcanons for Caleb, Essek, Mollymauk, and Fjord realising that they're in love with reader request is so good! I love that you said my request was marinating in your inbox XD I love this especially the night was peaceful when they got kidnapped, they thought that they could get away but couldn't, they never stop trying to escape, they only remember being beaten up, they were unconscious when the came, Caleb was worried but realised how urgent this is to him, he refused to acknowledge his feelings but decided to worry about it later, Fjord felt like he didn't have to put a mask on around them, he met them when they hitched a ride with Jester XD, they caught his attention, their bond grew stronger when they got to know each other, they assured that he will be loyal to them, his heart beats fast despite his calm expression, things finally become less hectic, he noticed how excited they are or how much they care or how friendly they are, everyone decided to go to sleep after a long day, he quietly listened to their rant, he reassured them when they apologized for taking up his time, he was just happy when he realised his feelings for them, he doesn't mind but he doesn't want it to blind him either, he embraced it, how different their first impressions were of each other XD, they're as competitive as Essek, he became more friendly as they listened to him for hours, he didn't realise how hard he was falling for them, he refused to acknowledge that it might mean something, it pained him when the thought of betraying them occurred to him, he felt ashamed when all of them found out, he was utterly shocked when they gave him a chance, what they said left quite an impression on him, they gave him hope even when he messed up, that's when he realised what his feelings were for them, Mollymauk is drawn to how strange they are like him & vice versa, they were by his side when he gained his peacock charm, they always indulged him in his card readings as they don't like to be bored too, both of them are troublemakers XD, both of them helped a bit before going to local tavern which led to an interesting evening, he was feeling buzzed but smiled when he saw how they're dancing happily, he usually wasn't up for loud & abrasive shows of charismatic whit, he isn't sure if what he feels for them is love, he felt excited & worried, they invited him to dance which he accepted happily, both of them teased each other before they danced, both of them were enjoying themselves before they kissed, he actually paused before he acted like it didn't affect him, they said it's a secret but they don't mind telling if he continues to dance with them which he did, both of them continued until the next morning, he would never forget that night as he's grateful that they're with him as they're the best thing to appear in his new life! Thank you so much for doing my request because I love it so much :)

Hihihihi!!! I’m really glad you liked them lol. I had them marinating for so long in my inbox cause I had so many ideas , just taking me a bit to execute them to my liking hehe. But I’m glad you enjoyed them, your request was definitely a fun write ❤️

#critical role #critrole #the mighty nein #<333

[narwhalish]

Some Shadowgast AU Art I did as some lighting studies :) They be at the dance >.> If you haven’t seen it check out the fic here!!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33320284/chapters/82744327

#Critical Role #Shadowgast #Criticle Role Fanart #Essek Thelyss #Caleb Widogast #TLOU AU #WIZARD BOIS GONNA BE DANCING GUYS #Caleb just noticed Essek showed up #Essek is just yearning while watching caleb dance

[sky-scribbles]

I know we as a fandom have gushed a lot, and wonderfully, over Essek in 57 not knowing that he’s going to fall head over heels in friendship with the Nein, not knowing he’s going to love the scrawny human who just held up the beacon. But something I’m equally emotional about is Essek not knowing that the Nein, and Caleb, are going to fall in love with him.

Because why would he? He’s resigned to living in a cold, self-centred world where no one gives a damn about him except his baby brother and Uraya. Essek sees himself as selfish and aloof and arrogant, and he’s right. He’s caused unfathomable harm. He’s used to not fitting in, and he holds himself at arm’s length from everyone, never showing his real self. He doesn’t even really know how to do caring relationships. Why would anyone ever care back?

But these people right here - they’re going to relate to his brokenness and his loneliness. They’re going to find it cool that he floats, and think his awkwardness charming, and ask him what his favourite food is.

And Essek doesn’t know that in a few months, that little blue tiefling is going to be so happy to see him that she runs to hug him on sight. He doesn’t know that one day, the pink firbolg’s going to pick him up and carry him to safety, refusing to leave Essek behind even when it puts his own life at risk. He doesn’t know that soon, the charming half-orc’s going to notice him in distress and come to check on him and reassure him rather than leaving him to process his grief alone.

He doesn’t know that the messy ginger human is going to love him because of his sharp edges and shadows, not despite them.  He doesn’t know that he and Caleb are going to fit together so neatly, listening to each other, understanding each other, Essek’s own tunnel-vision focus balancing perfectly with Caleb’s cluttered, easily-distracted mind. He doesn’t know that he’s the one who’ll help show Caleb that people like them can grow, and change, and be good for each other. He doesn’t know he’s going to be the final, longest love of a man who’s been burned so badly.

Essek looks at these seven idiots and thinks that one day, they will see him as their enemy and despise him - but no, they’re going to think he’s super cool and that they love him a whole lot. Imagine that.

#i'm nearly at 57 in my cr rewatch #so i had feelings #critical role #essek thelyss #caleb widogast #shadowgast #my cr meta

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

Both Caleb and Beau (after she hears his story) are super over protective of each other at first, if also more prone to showing off. (Beau "wins" more often because she's faster, to Caleb's eternal frustration) Caleb almost has a heart attack when Beau spends the entire party after the Pit Fight GLARING at Trent. Does Trent start to suspect them earlier? Do they tease each other over their crushes? Clara gives Beau Caleb's letters if/when they visit for Veth or Dairon gets them for her somehow

I think that Trent absolutely does, he would for sure notice Beau glaring at him, hands curled into fists and just positioning herself between Caleb and Trent when she can. He half wants to grab her and Nott and run and get somewhere safe and out of harm, but he can't even move let alone speak. Trent keeps a close eye on all of them after that.

And Caleb doesn't tease Beau so much as giving her knowing looks that just make her flip him off. Beau does tease him about Essek and Eadwulf and Astrid whenever the opportunity presents itself.

I think that Clara does sneak Beau the letters as an act of rebellion against her husband. And when she reads them, she just hugs him so tight, seeing how much he cared about her even after so long apart and he was growing up.

#empire siblings neighbor au #critical role #lis makes hcs #mighty nein #empire siblings