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ilooklikeaburntchickenugget · 3 years

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Only Mine Pt. 5

A/N: THANK YOU ALL FOR THE SWEET MESSAGES ABOUT THIS SERIES! It’s honestly so fun to write about so I’m glad all of you like it as much as I do. Pairing: Gerard Way x F!Pop Star!Reader Word count: 2,337 Warnings: Some swearing, mentions of anxiety and stress

You were humming an idea you had, your phone sitting out and playing one of the hundreds recordings you had for songs. Sweatpants and a large hoodie with fuzzy socks were the only appropriate attire for the recording studio, your hair carelessly held up by a scrunchie in a bun on the top of your head, glasses slightly crooked on your face.

“You get it, right?” You asked from the couch, where your legs were propped up against your chest.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I do.” Ray smiled, turning back to the computer and putting in a few various sounds.

“I’m thinking of putting in these ‘Oh’ sounds over and over, as background, pre-verse and then in the chorus.” You included.

“That would be cool.” Gerard laid back in the chair in between you and Ray, “Make them lower though, they’ll contrast your voice.” You nodded, agreeing.

“I want to make it sound frantic, almost anxious, right? That’s kind of the feeling of the song.” “Well, yeah, that makes sense with the meaning and lyrics.” Ray added on and you nodded. “I think it sounds sick.” “Thanks man.” You smiled lightly, “I have like 20 of these. Not the same song, but for the new album.” “Already?” He asked, shocked.

“Don’t underestimate her,” Gerard looked over at him, arms crossed and slouching back, “Give her five minutes and she’ll have an entire fucking song conducted.” You nodded.

“Maybe not five, but something along those lines.”

“Have you made a title for the record?” Ray asked next and you shook your head.

“I have most of it composed, I don’t have a title though.” You said, “It’s a concept album, so as you guys know, it’s written like a book. But there’s this whole plot and everything. So it’s not like I can name it after someone or something, like I did with the last one, I have to find something.” “What about a song name?” Gerard looked up at you, “Name it after a song, maybe. One that you feel embodies the record as a whole.” “I don’t know,” You sighed out of partial frustration, “I’m not good at naming albums. I almost named the last one Gerard, but Ray told me no.” You could hear Ray lightly snicker remembering that.

“Really?” Gerard asked, a look of slight shock on his face.

“What?” You asked, “You act like you don’t know that entire record is about you.” He shrugged.

“It still flatters me.” “Well this one is kinda about you,” You admitted, “More about the picture the media has painted us out to be.” “You mean bad boy makes innocent girl bad?” He asked and you nodded.

“It’s almost set out as a character v. self, character v. character, and character v. society album.” You explained, “She’s frustrated with herself because she knows he’s bad but she loves him, she’s mad at him because he’s that way but she also loves him for it, and she’s mad at everyone who’s telling her he’s bad, because she knows it, but she can’t help it.” “So like an addiction?” Ray asked and you nodded.

“That’s why Clean is on there. It’s the last track, it’s her almost cleansing herself from everything.” “That makes sense.” Gerard nodded.

“I mean, I think it’s brilliant.” Ray began playing with a few more sounds while talking, “I hope people take it as it is, AKA it’s very ironic, but addressing that by making an entire record is pretty bad ass.” You lightly laughed.

“Thanks,” You smiled, “Maybe Gerard is making me corrupt, making me a badass and all.” You winked playfully at him.

“Ah yes, I’m going to make you my emo queen.” The three of you began laughing.

“I am thinking about changing my look to take on this alter ego,” You began, “You cut off all your hair and bleached it to be a representation of The Patient.” You looked to Gerard, “I don’t think I would do anything to my hair, but I would change up my wardrobe and makeup look.” “Like start off as you are and gradually get more rebellious looking?” Ray asked and you nodded.

“The paparazzi will love that.” You lightly smiled sarcastically, a few moments of silence at the end. “Thank you guys, by the way, for taking time off to help me make this.” “No problem,” Ray smiled and nodded, “Besides, everyone loves you and we’ve been having some writing block lately.” “And I didn’t have a choice.” Gerard said. You eyed him, throwing a pen which hit his head and he very lightly flinched at the impact.

“Oh stop it.” You rolled your eyes.

“Ready to go in?” Ray asked, motioning to the recording booth. You nodded getting up and grabbing a pair of headphones. You put them on, beginning to do some short vocal warm ups. Ray was sitting right outside through the glass window at the panel, Gerard leaning over and playing with a few things on the sound board.

“Ready?” Ray asked into the mic and you nodded, pulling out notes on your phone to read lyrics.

“We’re just doing verse and chorus, right? No belts or high notes or anything?” He shook his head.

“That’ll be next.” He responded and you nodded. The music started up, giving you a few seconds to prepare before you began singing the lyrics, both Gerard and Ray actively adjusting various switches and such. Finally, when the song wrapped up, you took a few steps back from the mic as they stopped the recording.

“How was that?” You asked.

“Incredible as always.” Ray smiled and you smiled back, “Now we have to work on high notes and belting for the bridge and final chorus, then we can do background vocals.” You nodded, “Let me just edit a bit of the track.” It only took him a matter of minutes before replaying the track, a huge smile plastered on your face the entire time.

“It’s sick!” You smiled and clapped, jumping a bit.

“It’s honestly incredible.” Gerard smiled too.

“Thank you.” You smiled back.

“Ready for everything else?” Ray asked and you nodded.

It took you another hour of recording and getting everything before you could finally retire the recording and production process for the song, getting out of the booth and grabbing a water.

The finished product was incredible, it had the perfect amount of everything from base to drums with a little bit of synth and a light echo attached to your voice.

“Do you think this new record’s gonna be as big as the last?” Ray asked you, all three of you now on various pieces of furniture in the studio and eating burritos, which had been jointly decided upon pretty quickly when you all grew hungry. “Mmm,” You hummed, thinking for a minute, “I don’t know. Probably not considering winning 10 Grammys in one night is a record,” “On top of the, like 40 other awards you got.” Ray laughed.

“Yeah, true,” You agreed, “But I don’t make music to win awards or anything. I make music because I want to and because I love to and other people like it.” You explained, “You guys are the same.” They nodded. “The awards are just something nice.”

“I mean, you’re basically on top of the world.” Ray responded.

“Yeah, but that’s what makes it all the more scary,” You began, “You kind of look down from your stance at the top, having everything you’ve ever dreamed of in your career, and you have to ask what do you do next. And then it turns in to panic because there’s no where to go. And that’s why Gerard is up with me every other night while I’m having a panic attack about what the fuck I do next.”

“I don’t think I’m much help.” He added.

“You’re more help than if I was alone.” You responded, “But I’m kind of excited for this new era. There’s no limits anymore, I feel like, so I’ll just take on this good girl gone bad character. Not in real life, of course, but my alter ego.” “So you’re gonna reset everything?” Ray asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, hopefully. Starting with my closet.” You took a bite of your food, “Gee, take me to Hot Topic.” He rolled his eyes.

“If you want to do that, then just take all my leather jackets.” “You have too many anyways.” “Do not,” He warned, “I take pride in my jacket collection.” This time you rolled your eyes. “You have an entire rack in your closet for jackets.” “Uh huh, says Miss ‘I have to have an entire room for my purse and shoe collection’.” “Oh, please, it’s part of my personality.” “Well jackets are apart of mine.” He fired back.

“You two are literally an old couple.” Ray interrupted.

“Kinda.” You agreed.

“But for real,” Ray asked next, “What is going on in the world of Y/F/N Y/L/N?” You sighed.

“For once it feels like nothing,” You admitted, “No brand deals really, almost no interviews, no tour because that finished up, just this I guess.” You took another bite and continued, “I did recently get the opportunity for there to be a documentary on me and my life though. Like a camera crew and everyone follow me around for a few critical weeks of the year, put it into a whole movie type thing about how I live, my fame, all that.” “Wait, what?” Gerard asked, now a mixture of shock and concern on his face. “You-you never told me.” He said next.

“Well, yeah, I mean I told them I would at least have to think about it. I was planning on telling you but I needed to figure out if I wanted to go through with it first. I was very indecisive about it. Still am.” “So what are you thinking?” Ray asked, clearly trying to break some of the tension.

“I still don’t know,” You admitted, “I mean, a part of me really wants people to understand why I’m so under the radar, why I’ve disappeared from the world for a while. But the other part wants to protect that privacy. Plus if we were to theoretically go through with this, Gee, you would have to be okay with it too since they’ll be filming in our homes, and very possibly me and you.” He nodded, “And plus, I don’t know if it’s the right timing. I’m starting this new era of me being private and taking on this alter ego for everyone else, it may just be bad timing too.”

“I think it would be interesting for people to be able to see you, like the real you. And how you deal with the fame and all.” Ray added.

“Yeah, but,” You took a brief pause to find words, “How much of my privacy am I willing to forfeit for that?”

You and Gerard got back to your New York townhouse, kicking off your shoes and almost immediately crashing on the bed. You had to admit, at least to yourself, that your mind was beyond conflicted with what to do. Your next album release would have been perfect timing to plan starting a family with Gerard. Release the album, stay completely under the radar, and go on a small tour with a few big shows. But the opportunity for the documentary to be made would make a huge deal to your life. It would be nearly impossible to do both at the same time, though.

You laid down, your head on Gerard’s shoulder, as you both laid in bed reading your books trying to wind down. But Gerard, being your husband, best friend, and soulmate, knew you were stressed. Just from even looking at you, although no one else could tell, he could.

“Talk to me.” He said softly, barely above a whisper.

“I don’t want to disrupt your reading,” You sighed, “Or annoy you.” “I like listening to you talk.” He glanced to you, your eyes meeting. You didn’t know how a man could be that gorgeous, he just was. “It’s soothing, even when you rant.” You lightly laughed, snuggling further into him. He willingly took one of his arms, swinging it behind you and placing his book down on his nightstand, marking the page.

“Fine,” You sighed, moving down so your head was on his chest, feeling it rise and fall with every delicate breath he absentmindedly took. Your hands found their way there too, drawing circles on the shirt he had on.

So there the two of you laid, you pouring our your anxiety and worries to your husband, who seemed to understand what you were saying, translating every jumble of emotion you had into a symphony of calmness.

“This is all up to you babe, I’m just along for the ride.” He said, “But maybe this is a sign, ya know? Maybe you should take this opportunity to have a documentary be made about you, because maybe people will begin to actually understand the extent to which your life has been thrown into the spotlight, and why you need that privacy. And maybe that sympathy will get us to an even better place where we can start a family, worry free from any chance that our child or children will be in the spotlight.” “You’re so smart.” You lightly laughed, nuzzling into him. “I’ll think about it, Gee.” And like that a lightbulb went off in your head. You squeezed out of his embrace, groaning and getting up out of bed, his face filled with confusion. “Where’re you going? Did I say something wrong? I-” “No, it’s a song idea.” You palmed your face in your hand, “Like a really good one.” You grabbed your phone to go record it. “You get it, right?” “Not really because I don’t record as many songs as you, but kinda.” You groaned again, his face so innocent as you eyed him.

“You’re an ass.”

#gerard way x reader #gerard way fanfiction #gerard way #mcr gerard #my chemical gerard #my chemical romance #My Chem #my chemical gee #my chemical romance x reader

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fandomtrash465 · 4 years

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Time Fluff: Chapter 1

A/N: Hi lovelies! So this is my first ever post and I’m super nervous about posting this so please be nice! Constructive criticism is appreciated and I hope that you guys enjoy this, I don’t know how many parts there is going to be in this but I know that it’ll be more than three. I know that this part is a little slow but please bare with me! Thanks for reading and I luv ya <3

Summary: Bucky x reader. Bucky and reader have liked each other for a long time but they’re both in denial of the other’s feelings. What will happen when Tony’s new invention accidentally brings 40sBucky and 40sSteve to the present? If this were to go in the actual MCU timeline it would probably be sometime before infinity war and before they actually figured out time travel.

Word Count: 1197

Warnings: I don’t think any??? Is mischievous Wanda and Natasha a warning?

Other Chapters: Time Fluff Masterlist

“What did you make a bet on?” I ask while scrunching my nose in disgust as Wanda continues to pour in some very questionable looking juice. “We made a bet with Steve and Sam” Wanda replied casually. Natasha glanced up and smirked at me. I shook my head and chuckled in response. “What exactly is it that you’re doing?” I ask curiously as I walk into the kitchen of the compound. The first thing that I see is my best friends Wanda and Natasha grabbing random food items, attempting to stuff them in a blender.

“They said that Bucky would finally make a move on you last night and kiss you while you two were sitting together during the movie, but we knew that he’s way to scared to do that” Natasha said, smirking wider now.

“Guys!” I exclaim without realizing it. “You do realize that he doesn’t like me like that don’t you?” I ask at a more reasonable volume.

“Oh honey, you’re just so blind, aren’t you? How can you not see the way that he looks at you? It’s painfully obvious how much the two of you like each other” Wanda explained to me as though I were a five-year-old.

I sigh and shake my head, trying to ignore what she just said. “Where are Steve and Sam? I think I need to have a few words with them” I’m already thinking of how many different ways that I could threaten/actually harm them if they say a word to Bucky about my feelings towards him.

“They’re in the living room. Promise you won’t tell them what we’re doing in here? I want them to be surprised” Wanda answers while smiling brightly and pointing to the doorway.

“I promise” I say while laughing a little “Thanks” I stroll into the living room where sure enough I see the two soldiers looking nervous on the couch. As soon as I walk in their heads snap up in my direction looking fearful.

“Oh, Y/N. It’s just you. I thought that Nat and Wanda were done with whatever they’re doing” Steve says with a deep breath as Sam falls back on the couch looking relieved.

“Yeah good luck with when they really are ready, while I was in there they looked very pleased with themselves” I say and they instantly look slightly more alert. “But I came in here to ask the two of you about that bet that you made. What the hell makes you think that Bucky has feelings for me?? And please tell me that you didn’t tell him anything about your little bet?” I worriedly ask, looking back and forth between the two.

“I promise that we didn’t tell Barnes anything about this whole thing, but honestly even if we did I think that he’d be really happy to know that you feel the same way about him. It’s ridiculously obvious from the way that he looks at you and talks to you” Sam tells me with his brow furrowed slightly.

“Y/N I promise that he really, really likes you. He tells me that he’s planning on asking you out at least once a month but he always gets cold feet at the last minute and changes his mind” Steve tells me patiently.

“It’s just hard for me to believe that-“ I start but am but off by someone entering the room and interrupting me.

“Hard for you to believe what?” Asks the most perfect person on the entire planet, James Buchanan Barnes.

I stutter and try to change the subject as quickly as possible “That Steve and Sam would make a bet with Nat and Wanda that they obviously would win. It’s dangerous to do something like that” I say jokingly.

“Oh really? And what did you bet on?” Bucky asks with a brow quirked up.

“We thought that something was going to happen during the movie last night, but it didn’t” Steve says coolly and I give him a very grateful glance for playing along.

“That was a bad idea, you guys suck at predicting movies. Ain’t that right doll?” Bucky says and throws a playful look at me which I can’t help but smile back at.

Suddenly a voice comes into the room “Miss Y/L/N? Mr. Stark is requesting you in his lab. He says that he needs assistance with a rather large project”

“Did he specify what it’s about or why I need to help him instead of Banner?” I ask while looking at the ceiling.

A different voice is now over the intercom “Y/N, come help me. Banner is sleeping and that is a very rare occurrence so I feel like it would be dangerous for him and myself if I were to wake him up” Tony said seemingly out of nowhere.

“Okay, okay. I get it. I’m on my way now” I reply while still looking at the ceiling “I guess that’s my cue to leave, see you guys. And let me know before Nat and Wanda give you two what they made” I say to the boys before walking out of the room and head to the lab.

~ ~ ~

“Okay Tony come on, you really think that you are going to be able to discover time travel by yourself?” I roll my eyes after I’m done reading over the notes that Tony has handed me.

The man looks shocked that I don’t immediately agree with his ideas “But what if it could be! And I wouldn’t be by myself, I’ve got Banner, and you. Think about it Y/N. How incredible would it be if we could bring people from the past?” I hesitate for a moment before shaking my head.

“There’s just too much that could possibly go wrong. Why are you suddenly so hell-bent on making this work?” I ask even though I already know half the answer. Once Tony Stark gets his mind set on something he will see it through until it kills him.

“I-I just really want to make this work okay? It’s a concept that goes back for centuries and someone should be the one to figure it out” I can hear in his voice that he’s hiding his real motives for this.

“Tony, is this about wanting to get your parents back?” I ask carefully, not wanting him to set him off or make him upset with me. “Because if it is I think that you should give this a rest. I don’t think that it’s a good idea to be messing around with this, especially if you’re trying to change something from the past”

“That’s the thing! I’ve been talking to Strange about this for a while and after all of his research he said that if we did figure it out nothing would change in the past. All that we would do is create an alternate timeline that would have the changed events, but our real past wouldn’t be altered at all” Tony says quickly and excitedly. Finally, I sigh and realize that he may have a point and there is no more use arguing with him.

“Yeah, okay. I’ll try to help you figure this out”

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes #avengers #time travel #marvel #natasha romanoff #wanda maximoff #steve rogers #sam wilson #tony stark #bruce banner

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petrichorismydrug · 4 years

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RUBATOSIS || JJK || Part 01

Pairings: Jungkook x reader

Genre: Fluff, minor angst (this can change) | Roommates, coffee shop, soulmates AU | Latina OC

Word count: 2.8+k

Sumary: It started with a small hold of his hand, then it was just easy to hold his hand because for some weird and unknown reason it fit perfectly with yours.

A/N: I'm a sucker for Soulmate AU's, what about it? (also hybrid ones but thats a conversation for my other fic) I just can say that this story is a mess in my mind but I am working really hard to put all in place (dont know how I really made this chapter with all the ideas flying and me barely catching them)

PT1 | PT2

[THEN]

Living alone was one of the most exciting thoughts that crossed your mind, the idea alone was intriguing and scary but more than anything, adventure was what made you tremble with anticipation. Of course, that was until actually starting your alone and independent life that realization hits and time showed you that in reality this whole thing of having your apartment and control of everything was nice, yes, but, not sharing it with anyone, it is one of the things in this life that you started to dislike the most. Ironically, this epiphany showed a little late, to be precise six months after living alone.

Basically, to have no one to prepare breakfast for in the morning, someone to eat lunch with and talk about the little things of the day that made you smile someone to dine with and maybe watch a bad comedy or horror movie to criticize every mistake and focus on them not to die of fear. Arriving from work and not being received by anyone, and in the same way, never receiving anyone made you aware of the things that meant to be forgotten wanted and never show up again. Everything was going well if not for that, and in a way, this is affecting other aspects of your almost perfect life.

Have you ever eaten something ultra-delicious, but then you eat it later with someone you appreciate, it tastes even better? Well, if you haven’t you should, this is very well known, everyone loves food, so you do, food is good and being good in the kitchen was a plus to your situation. You could serve someone a three-course meal and never know it’s a way of saying ‘You cute, I dig you’, that’s the beauty of food, it’s like another language and the ones interested in it can talk it.

but her mind always returns to the same, 'if there is no one to share it with, what is the point? it doesn’t taste quite as good as it should be'

This is one of the many problems she had to deal with when raised by a somewhat traditional Latin family. Of course, there are many good things in the culture, but you stop at times like these and start to feel homesick now that you are away, and you want to have the whole family together to talk, sing, and even to discuss.

Her apartment is nice, comfy and with an open concept that keeps a clear and controlled environment. The first month was challenging and adventurous, but as time passed there was not enough yarn to knit, books to read, enough plants to take care, enough flour to make desserts or even, enough series on Netflix to obsessed with, and when she started to lose weight the problem was clear. She needed a roommate. Clearly.

Reaching that conclusion was easy, now, finding a roommate, that was the real problem, because it's not just finding a roommate, but finding the right one. Gender? Doesn't matter. Age? Doesn't matter. Being crazy? Can't happen -with one in the apartment is more than enough-. Big pets? Sadly, building owners do not allow animals larger than a domestic cat, which is an injustice, even more because they give less opportunities of a warm home to larger animals. Don't have time for your roommate? Don't like sweets? Sorry you must go. Next please.

***

"Jin, have you seen my wooden spoon?" the boy in question looked at her sideways and a smile spread across his face, she was looking everywhere picking up things, opening and closing drawers and just seeing her was funny.

"The one I give you? The one with your name on it?"

"Yes, I been looking for her and I think I dropped somewhere, and I can't lose her, I just, can't" knowing that missed pieces slash things go to another part and you don't know when they will come to you again was intriguing, but this spoon was way to special to just go around losing her. Many, many socks were missed, and their other half was lonely, but it literally was not a big of a deal when you can buy another pair of the same, more if they were weird shapes and colorful printed all over them. luckily the polka dots and strapped ones that she only uses on special occasion were safe and sound at the back of her drawer.

"Maybe, and just maybe, don't pay attention to me, but, are we talking about the one in your hand?" she let out the air she was holding, and worried to see that yes, in fact, she had the spoon in her hand. She dropped his shoulders defeated.

"I think I am going crazy" While making coffee for the client in turn, Jin asked with real curiosity

"What is going on? the neighbors being noisy? Because you know I can deal with them." she narrowed her eyes to him

"First of all, yes, you are very loud. I do not care what you say, jumping in your bed late at night, because according to you, 'it is relaxing' ... it does not sound good, much less from my apartment that sadly it is below yours." he looked embarrassed by the scarlet color of his ears, but his superb smile covered him very well "It doesn't matter, forger it, but don’t you dare your Tim Allen 'how do I look' voice of Santa Clause, it would no work this time"

"No but really, 'How do I look? Nice?'" Jin said with all the self-confidence of the world and mastery of that phrase with everything; facial and body management. Delivering the coffee he made, with a smile to the girl who now -if she had not had one before- developed a crush to the barista. "Have a nice day" was said with the most common custom service and with that, she left stunned, like many other women during the day. It is good to have a partner who is your boss and your friend. "What is going on?" she pouts

"Nobody told me it would be so difficult to find a roommate" Jin scoffed

"Whoever told you it was easy is a dic- addicted to lies"

"Just ... you're my friend, be a nice one and support me, will you?"

"What do you want me to say? “she pouts again, and the simple act made Jin hug her "Do you want me to live with you?"

"Aw, you're so cute, but no, of course not."

"Hey!" he was offended " What do you mean by that?" she takes a step away from him, and her stare was warm but little sad.

"Jin, we can't live together " the look they shared for a few small seconds that felt like a small eternity, full of knowledge and words never said, made the environment a bit heavy. Some time ago, the elephant in the room was big, now it is just back in occasions like this, looking thru the big window but he walks away immediately.

"I know" His words were soft.

The bell of the store rang, announcing another customer. He took her hand giving it a little stroke and kissed her forehead; received customers with his characteristic customer service smile was his specialty, while she was dedicated to continue with her cookies, which she had forgotten for a moment, trying to forget the strange and abstract reddish tones on her cheeks.

***

When closing time was finally near the store was for some funny reasons always busier that other hour in the day, and maybe any other coffee shop at the area. Reasons? The boss. A lot of girls tried to invite him to date and, what better opportunity than waiting the last moment of work of someone to do it? It was sad when they all went alone with their hot coffee or chocolate with no boy next to them, but Jinbony was no easy boy. And really, people need to start picking that up, he has been the same with the little fan club that has been gathering almost every day, and it is a little scary that there are more and more girls, more in the weekends, lucky for him those are his off days lately. But on the bright side, they always spend a good amount of money in the coffee so they can come as much as they want.

Even though, with all the work, girls whining and acting cute and one or two difficult clients, the day was nice and the night pleasant, not so cold nor so warm, just perfect, announcing the slipping cold and beautiful winter, waving its way, with wind embraces, walking if not running faster and quietly, like a whisper, a soft and caramelized rustle.

The hope of having a roommate was getting farther and farther. Jin was setting the alarm when her phone rang. At this time, it was normal to receive calls from unknown numbers, even so, it always filled her with distrust. Phone calls were never an easy task to do, no when you don't know the person at the other end, and surely, she does not know this one.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this _____?" the voice said excited. It sounded a little breathy, and kind of appealing?

"Yes, who is calling?"

"Oh sorry, I'm calling for the apartment, I saw your announcement at the University, are you still looking for a roommate?" at that moment, Jin stepped out of the store and locked the door, turning to see the surprise and confusion on her face mouthing a 'what?' she dismissed the question with a gesture. 'University?' she thought, not knowing what the guy was talking about because she doesn't remember putting ads there.

"Yes, it's me, I mean I am am-still-am-looking for one" silence. Hardly 3 seconds passed until some background voices filled the silence, as if he had his phone on speaker. A 'Shhh' was heard.

"So... you are still looking for a roommate" the voice said as matter of fact

"Ah! yes. The room is still free."

"Perfect, when can I come to see it?"

"When you want to."

"More perfect even, can I come tomorrow?" the voice for weird that it was, started to put a smile in her face.

"Yes, at what time?"

"Around 6 it's fine with you?"

"Six is good."

"Awesome, see you tomorrow then." and a lot of 'wooo's' were heard before he could end the call.

Suddenly her phone was really spellbinding, and it seemed to be interesting this happening? Finally, a roommate. She wasn't even mad at how the call ended. She looked heavenward, taking notes of how the sky was dark blue and purple with lots and lots of stars, it was without doubts a pleasant night, even the police siren that was being heard at the distance was a great add to the calm night.

The voice of his friend brought her back of her mental notes of the day. "So, a new prospect?"

"Yes" she said almost breathless "This is so on point, don't you think?" they started to walk the so known path that lead to their homes.

"Yes, I know, you are always lucky to have things as you want."

"Hey, that is so uncalled for. What do you mean?" Jin scoffed.

"You are a good person that for some weird reason always gets what she wants." that matter of fact face didn't pleased her

"That is so not true! I beg to differ."

"You really do, you just don't notice"

"It's just coincidence Jin."

"Didn't you know?" he went poker face "Coincidence does not exist." his serious face and tone was broken by his laughter,

getting her too, and basically that was a daily basis thing between them, there was always smiles here and there, laughs and inside jokes that only the two of them knew. being with Jin was always a roller coaster but without the feeling of leaving your stomach at the back of the starting game. When finally laugh died she could speak.

"That's what they say, but honestly, I do think coincidence has a little space there. Maybe not everything is destiny or fate, don't you think?"

"Nah, if that was the case, we would be dating now." the way he said it and the little effort he put into sounding normal, gave chills. There is no way for someone to say something so embarrassing and not feel sorry as soon as the words leave your mouth

"Oh, shut it." it seems that she said those words, for the colors on her face, what is that color called? traffic light red? But Jin didn’t seem affected, instead he put on a dramatic voice, accompanied with a hand on his heart.

"If it wasn't for Brandon, that little bastard."

“He has nothing to do with this.”

“Say that all the times you want, but he is the one that…”

“Jin, you know that that is no true, lets just leave it there, and besides, you are no talking true here, you never liked me.”

Jin kept silence, everyone knew she had a crush on him in the past, because when you meet in person someone such as him is impossible not to curse the nature for the injustice and be all dragged by his looks. And then you get to know him and he is amazing, but then you meet him more and you know that he is no really the guy for you, and its fine, he is an amazing friend but nothing more can come from that relationship, even though everyone in the world says that men and women can not be real friends because sex is always present, that was not true in their friendship, they all, were just friends, nothing more nothing less.

***

They finally reached their building and were at the elevator. The silence in there was replaced by the notification tone of her phone. A text message to be exact.

[09:36 p.m.] Unknown 'my name is Jungkook, btw'

[09:36 p.m.] Unknown 'Jeon'

[09:36 p.m.] Unknown 'Just figured you wanted to know'

[09:37 p.m.] Unknown 'or maybe not, but'

[09:37 p.m.] Unknown 'see you tomorrow'

"How cute" she stated, answering back to him.

"I know I'm cute, and you know, it would be a pleasure to have my heart broken by you"

"Please stop quoting the fault in our star, that is weird." and by the time they reached her floor, she pressed send.

[09:40 p.m.] Me ‘Pleased to know your name, no long stranger. See you tomorrow.’

#jjk #jungkook x reader #jungkook fanfic #bts fanfic #soulmate au #roommates au

38 notes · View notes

nymphl · 5 years

Text

In the General’s Bed - Regency!Hux x Reader - Ch. 3 - To hate a General

A/N - Hello there! As promised, here goes chapter 3 of In the General’s Bed. I don’t have much to say, since I’m very, very sleepy right now, but I do hope you like this chapter. It’s one of my favorites... and I really, really like these cliffhangers but I know you hate them hahahaha Just for the record, the historical facts mentioned in this story are mostly real... Of course a few things here and here are modified to fit the story... but well, I try to be as accurate as possible. If you find anything wrong, let me know... I’m not British, so...

Story Summary: The General is cornered… Upon returning from a successful campaign in Battle of Waterloo, Armitage Hux knows he has no excuses left; he must produce the much-needed heir. The problem is, when the two of you parted five years ago, it was not in the best of terms. Now, he may not find his wife, you, so willing as he first expected, nor keen on taking part in any of his political games. [Hux x Reader – Hux x You – Regency AU].

Warnings for the entire story: Will contain at times; graphic violence, sex, drugs and manipulation, coarse language and OOCness.

AO3 Tags: Regency Era; Alternate Universe; Alternate Story; Alternate Universe - Historical; Arranged Marriage; Politics; War; Napoleonic Wars; England - 1815; Married Couple; OOCness; Smut

Wordcount: 6188

PREVIOUS CHAPTER *** NEXT CHAPTER

THE WAY TO LONDON WAS PAVED WITH SEPHUCRAL SILENCE.

Although the trip had been scheduled to take place during the weekend, the news of Lord Poe Dameron’s death hastened it by three days.

The coachman, under Hux’s orders, set a punishing pace over the horses. There were two carriages, one for you and Hux, and the second for Lux and his tutoress — to your displeasure, Rae Sloane chose to stay behind to organize your belongings. She was set to arrive two days after you did.

And even if you did not agree with her choice — for Lux needed her more than ever —, she had Hux’s approval.

You had not explained why you left Southampton all of a sudden to Lux. In fact, you had no idea how you would explain his father — his only living family — had died. The circumstances of his death were still a mystery to you. Hux merely received a missive from Lady Organa and informed you to prepare a few of your and Lux’s belongings for you were going to London.

Lux did not seem to care about leaving and as long as he had you or Rae, you doubted he would complain about something. And you thought he would not care when he learned about Poe. He was just four and unable to grasp the concepts of life and death. You were sure he did not acknowledge Poe as his father either; he never called him as such. To him you and Rae were his only family.

A yawn left you.

You were tired. Utterly spent, actually.

Even if Lux did not complain about leaving, he did not accept to stay away from you and you did not have the heart to force him to stay with his preceptress in another carriage.

Hux took your decision with some displeasure, but he did not voice his thoughts. He was not naïve enough — nor blind; he saw what you planned under your mask of courtesy — to believe you accepted Lux in your personal carriage only because you did not want to displease the boy, but because you wanted to keep him at bay.

If something was to take place between the two of you, it would be on your own terms, your initiative. And you thought that you proved you could do it fairly well last time.

Honestly, you did not know you had it in you — your experience was limited when it came to bedroom affairs —, but after he said you were not fit to play such a game with him, you felt like you should prove him wrong.

The mere remembrance of how you took him in your mouth — such a depravity! — had you blushing now. You had never done that before and never heard of a decorous lady — wife! — doing that to their husbands. In London’s most popular Ballrooms, there was talk of that being an act of courtesans and lowly whores.

You were neither.

However, seeing that your husband had no problem kissing you there in your first — and only — night together; how eager he seemed to repeat the act at that very moment — and how much pleasure it brought you — you thought that it might be good to him as well.

You were not wrong.

Hux did seem to enjoy it. A lot.

And honestly, the more the proper and oh, so very decent ladies of Ton said it was inappropriate — a woman who did enjoy such pleasures with her husband or who did use such means to bring pleasure to her husband was no better than a common whore — the more you wanted to try it. There were many opportunities for you to try it with other men, but while you did not know for sure Hux was six feet under, you did not have it in you to cheat on him — even if he probably did the same to you.

You decided to test your theory that night. He was putty in your hands — and mouth. And while your body demanded for you to go further with him — you knew he could give you so much more of those pleasures if you only let him —, you decided to put a stop to that night of debauchery.

If Hux wanted you, he would have to work for you.

And he would have you, eventually. But only when you decided he deserved you. For now, he would have to content himself with the smaller bits of attention you decided to bestow upon him.

If you were too weak to stop him, you knew you could count on Lux to help you.

A small smile, rapidly covered by a yawn, outlined your lips. Closing your eyes, you leaned your head against Hux’s shoulder. Lux was between the two of you, gripping the fabric of both of your clothes in his chubby hands.

The two of them were fast asleep. It was funny how, in spite of their obvious distaste and disapproval of each other, they clung to each other subconsciously.

Not for the first time, you wondered how he would behave with a child of his own — your child. You bit your bottom lip; your fingers played with his bluish cravat. Part of you wondered how he would react if you said Lux was his — would he be happy? Overjoyed? Surprised? Another part knew he would not take lightly to such lie.

You snuggled against him and let sleep take over you as well.

All servants were ready to welcome you when the carriage stopped at Piccadilly Street. Even before you could disembark, the building had you in awe.

There was talk around the city — there was always talk in Southampton —, concerning the General’s newest acquisition, but you did not expect it to be so… monumental.

Arkanis Hall was really a sight to behold. With its Greeks columns, it looked majestic and, at the same time, a bit intimidating. Undoubtedly, a mansion fit to accommodate a Duke. You knew how wealthy the Hux family was, but it still stunned you how much profit they made from their brewery in Ireland. Although your father did its best to hide from you the essence of your husband’s business, you knew very well their nature.

While he was away and there was talk about you being a widow, you conducted a thorough investigation concerning the nature of his business — in case you needed to oversee it.

His hand outstretched for you to take waved off whatever thoughts plaguing your mind. You placed your gloved fingers upon his and accepted his help to disembark. Lux was still sleeping and it was with some surprise — screw that! You were completely bewildered — that you saw him taking the boy in his arms with all the care in the world.

You even thought about offering to hold Lux yourself, but you realized that maybe that was not the best decision — not when there were so many servants watching your very soul.

In silence, you followed him inside, only to have both the butler and governess trailing right behind you, waiting for further instructions. You removed your gloves and watched, with narrowed eyes, as Hux climbed the stairs towards the bedrooms. Part of you wanted to follow him, but you knew what he was doing and that it in fact needed to be done, if you wanted to be respected by the servants.

Those people worked for other masters before and all they wanted was one single reason to badmouth you and Hux — at Lux’s expenses nonetheless. If it depended on you, they would have no reasons whatsoever to say anything.

But just in case Lux woke up… You gesticulated for the preceptress to follow Hux upstairs.

“Is there anything I need to know concerning the servants?” you asked as soon as you were left alone in the company of both the butler and the governess.

“They are here to serve, Your Ladyship,” the butler replied, his eyes cast down. “And they are happy to serve in anything you or the Lord see fit.”

You nodded, not at all pleased with their answers. The governess stayed in silence. You wondered if Hux had other plans in store for Rae. If she was not here to act as a governess as she did back in Southampton, then he must have thought of another occupation for her. In any case, you already saw her criticizing the governess — starting with the misalignment of the buttons in her uniform. After all, Rae Sloane always thought that having an impeccable appearance was prerequisite for an equally flawless work.

You squinted… Was that a missing button? As if it just popped out after someone tried to take it off or put it back on in a rush…?

A small smile graced your lips as you thought about how much the two of them would get along.

“Should I fetch the maid who will be assisting Your Ladyship?” she spoke for the first time, her tone and security in her words stunning you. Rae would definitely get along with her — it is, if she took care of her uniform first.

“Yes.” You started making your way towards the stairs. “Have someone prepare mine and Lux’s bath please and have some tea ready for us before we part for the funeral.”

“It shall be done, Your Ladyship,” she replied with a bow. “Will that be all?”

You even thought about not saying it out loud, but you could simply not control yourself, “Do something about your uniform. I can see your corset from here.”

There was no need to cast a look at her over your shoulder to know she was blushing. It made your smile broaden. Rae would definitely like her!

You sat in the drawing room looking at the windows with a lost expression. You still haven’t told Lux about Poe’s death and honestly you had no idea you knew what to say.

Part of you thought about letting Hux break the news. Another part trembled in fear at the idea. He would surely scar Lux for life… Well, but it could be fun to ask him to do it. He would probably stare at you as if you had grown thirty heads at the same time. The look in his face would be priceless.

Bringing the cup of tea to your lips, you sipped the warm liquid and leaned against the sofa. You were the first to get ready. It was still early in the morning and the last day of Lord Dameron’s funeral before the proper burial.

Although Lady Organa had it all settled to have his funeral in the Saint Paul’s Cathedral, His Grace, the Duke of Wellington, beat her to it and offered his mansion, Apsley House, as the last place for family, friends and comrades of War say their goodbyes.

Needless to say, you saw right through his good intentions. Even if Poe Dameron was a good commander, he was not even an Admiral or a General like Hux.

If your father were alive, you were sure he would not allow such. But if your father were alive, you would not have met Poe and taken Lux under your care. You knew he would never allow such scandal to befall upon his family name.

A sigh left you as you smoothed the skirts of your velvety black dress. In the very same instant, you placed your cup of tea back on the coffee table, the preceptress entered the drawing room leading Lux by the hand.

He was rubbing his eyes, still sleepy. And only you knew how grumpy and moody he could be in such circumstances. You waved the preceptress off, asking for her to bring him some hot chocolate.

It made him look at you with adoration in his eyes.

“Thank you, Mama.”

You bit your bottom lip.

It was now or never.

And never was not an option in this case.

You pulled him towards you by his chubby hands and adjusted his clothing. He really looked like a Little Lord with those clothes of his. A small smile graced your lips.

“Listen, Little Lord…” You started, caressing his cheeks. “We have to talk.”

He nodded, still too sleepy to say anything else.

“Well…” You breathed deeply through your nose. “You know Lord Dameron… the man who visits you from time to time and bring you some toys?”

He looked lost for a moment.

You helped him sit on the couch beside yourself, watching how he swung his little legs absentmindedly.

“The one who brought you some sweets?”

This time he smiled at you. It was all you needed to notice that one of his front tooth was missing. You touched his chin and tilted his head slightly back. It made him close his mouth automatically.

“Open up, Little Lord.”

He shook his head.

You knew how shy he became whenever one of his tooth fell. And considering it was one of his front teeth… Even so, you pressed him a bit more.

“Lux, open your mouth.”

He obeyed you this time. Unwillingly, but he did.

“When did it fall?”

“Today.”

“During your bath,” you completed for him. “Who helped you?”

Part of you was afraid he would say Hux did. You bit your bottom lip and with some surprised looked up when the preceptress came back and said she did. She approached Lux with handled him his hot chocolate.

“Of course you did,” you replied with some relief. You knew it made no sense, but you wanted Hux as far away as possible from Lux.

“What happened to Lord Dameron?” His childish voice brought you back from your musings. He had a chocolate mustache gracing his features.

Right.

You did not realize you completely fled the topic.

“He died?”

You cringed as the words left you. And to think you were worried about letting Hux break the news. You did even worse than he could possibly… Argh. You never hated yourself more than in that moment.

Casting a look at the preceptress and then back at Lux you were surprised to find him thoroughly concentrated on his mug. You accepted the small napkin she offered and cleaned his chin.

“He went to heaven?”

Rae Sloane would kill the both of you for this definition, but you thought that was a pretty good explanation for a four-year-old.

“Yes… That’s a way of putting it,” you conceded. “But please, don’t ever tell Rae that.”

“Why?” he asked, curiosity written all over his chestnut, expressive eyes.

“Listen, Little Lord,” you started, removing the mug from his hands. You knew he would pay you little attention as long as he had that in his grasp. You handed it to the preceptress and looked towards the door. She bowed and left the two of you alone. “Remember when I said he was your father?”

“Yes.”

He was puzzled. And slightly irritated you took his mug from him. However, he made no complaints. He knew when you were speaking seriously and that certainly qualified as one of such times.

“He is not coming to visit you anymore.”

“Heaven is a good place…?” Even if his words were those of affirmation, it sounded like a question. You nodded, allowing him time to formulate his sentence. “Then it’s fine, Mama.”

He was so naïve.

Innocent.

You wondered if he would cry when he saw Lord Dameron lying there in the coffin. Motionless.

Honestly, as much as you threw it in Hux’s face Poe Dameron visited, it was a very rare occasion. He did stop by to see Lux three or four times during his four years of life. Yet, he was still his father. And Lux adored him and his company.

Or his gifts, Rae Sloane would probably say.

You brought him to your arms and held onto him tightly. He embraced you back, leaning his ginger head against your shoulder.

In this very moment, the butler opened the double doors of the drawing room and Hux appeared, all dressed in black.

He cleared his throat.

“Ready to leave?”

Even if you were years older than Lux, you too could quite not grasp the concept of life and death and how the living made such a fuss over it.

And although you were versed in politics — your decision to bring Lux to his father’s funereal was but a political assertion —, it still fazed you how people could use the death of others to state their positions in the Ton.

Nobody even seemed to care — it is, except for Lady Organa and her family. They had been very courteous to you and Lux as well. Her son, Ben Solo, did not get along with your husband, but the two of them were at least polite towards each other.

He did not stay with you all the time. As a General, he had duties to perform and there were always elevated expectations over his head. And of course if he wanted to become Prime Minister, that was a good situation to start showing his cards.

His speech did that for him, although you could not understand why he did nothing to say Lux was Poe’s son. For all you knew — and only Lady Organa knew otherwise — everyone in Apsley House thought Lux was his and yours.

You bit your bottom lip as you heard everyone applaud all around you. He left the small platform where his speech took place and headed towards you — but not before greeting some Lords and politicians, including the Duke of Wellington himself, the last person to speak before the burial.

Before Hux could reach you, you excused yourself from Lady Organa’s company and asked a servant to deliver a small piece of paper to one of the reporters of The Times present at the funeral.

You kept your distance, not really sure you wanted to hear the Duke’s speech. It was funny — and infuriating as well — how every situation presented an opportunity good enough to one show off in the Ton, including a highly esteemed Duke. You never had any problems with him, but you had no qualms playing — and winning — politic games.

Part of you hated that they chose such a moment to start their dispute for the most prized position both in the Ton and the political field, but you would be damned if you let the Duke win.

You were so distracted in your own little world you barely saw Hux approaching, Lux trailing after him, one of his hands holding onto the fabric of his breeches.

Arching your brows, you opened your mouth to ask what sort of sorcery he performed over the boy, to have him acting so civilized towards him, but you closed it afterwards when he placed one of his hands on your waist and bestowed you with a kiss on the cheek.

Your heart broke a little at the realization that Lux was not yours. Not for the first time that day you wondered how it would change your relationship if the situation was any different.

“What are you doing here?”

You did not give him an immediate answer and disentangled yourself from his embrace, offering a hand for Lux to take.

He shook his head.

Instead, he accepted Hux’s hands and the two of them left you behind. A shocked expression on your face.

What the hell was that?

You had many questions to him.

As in, you wanted at least only one question thoroughly answered. No hesitation, no lies, no half-truths whatsoever.

After you put Lux to bed — and it finally downed on him that Poe Dameron was dead and was not coming back —, you left your chambers and headed towards your husband’s study room. He was either alone or still talking business with Rae Sloane.

Lord Dameron’s burial had been three days earlier. Rae arrived only yesterday. Needless to say, she lost no time to reprimand you for letting the boy believe his father had gone to heaven — it’s also needless to say she did not believe in God.

As for how close both Lux and Hux got in the last few days she had nothing to tell you. Sided with the enemy. As always.

And as expected.

You snorted.

Closing your dressing gown, braced yourself for her inquiry eyes and her disgust at your weakness as well. Honestly, you could not help your jealousy. It was not fair that Lux decided from day to night he preferred Hux over you.

And that was what was eating away your insides. That was simply not possible. He had bribed Lux with sweeties or something like that. The boy would never prefer his company over yours.

You raised your hand to knock on the door, but stopped yourself when you heard their current topic.

…So you plan on sending him to Eton?

There was silence after Rae’s words.

You held your breath, afraid they had heard you. You pressed your ear against the wooden door and waited for Hux’s reply. It came shortly after the sound of a glass — porcelain? — was placed over another surface — wood?

“Yes.”

He did not say anything else.

You bit your bottom lip.

“(Y/N), won’t like it,” Rae started. You could almost see her shaking her head, a strand of raven hair falling from her uptight hairdo. “She won’t approve of your actions. She will likely hate it if you send him to an overseas institution that accept children.”

Part of you expected your husband to take his time to respond. He was not one to small talk and he always thought his words very carefully — except, of course, when he was angry. It did not seem the case. You wondered, though, how he would react if he knew you were listening to this very conversation.

“She does not have a saying in it.”

“No?” Rae repeated. You could bet she was smiling. “Let me refresh your memories, General,” she added and he snorted, as if she said something so very amusing. “You’re not Lux’s father.”

Ouch.

That hurt.

You smiled in spite of the burning sensation in your stomach.

It seemed Rae was not on his side as you previously thought. You almost slapped yourself at such nonsense. Rae Sloane was not on his or your side. She played by her own rules and she supported no one, but herself.

The fact that she raised Hux and helped him with his abusive father did not mean she would support his every decision — even the stupid ones.

And if it concerned Lux, of course she would think about what was best for the boy and at the present time he needed you. The two of you.

…can see that.

You shook your head, pressing your ear again against the double doors. You missed part of what he said.

“I never said that was a bad decision,” Rae said, and by her movements — her steps — you could say she was about to leave the study room.

Crap.

But you haven’t heard everything. They still had so much more to say, right? You had to know what Hux was planning. He would never tell you.

You needed to know.

“I merely said you’re picking a hell of a fight with Lady Hux.”

You could almost see his smile — a mischievous smile at that — when he replied, “I can deal with her.”

Your heart accelerated, galloping against your ribcage — even Lux’s wildest horses could not keep with its rhythm. It had been a while since you last felt this angry.

First, he made the boy like him in the timeframe of what? Four days? Now he was planning on sending him away. On forcing him to part ways with you and Rae — the one he needed and would always need the most.

“I can deal with her…” you repeated his words, mimicking his smug tone. “I can deal with her… Really?” You bit your bottom lip in anger. “We shall see, Lord Hux.”

We shall see.

You had no idea what time it was when you heard the door of the anteroom cracking open. Probably very tired. If before you had no idea of your husband’s sleeping habits, now you knew he barely slept.

No wonder he had those dark circles under his eyes and his skin was getting paler and paler.

Well, he could die, you thought with the shadow of a smile crossing your lips. He could die for all you cared. He could die here, right now and you would not even bat an eye.

You brought Lux to the comfort of your arms and buried your nose in his ginger hair. Part of you hated that he even smelled like Hux — were they using the same shampoo? You would kill Hux if that was the case!

After he said he was sending Lux away you thought that nothing, no explanation whatsoever could ever make you love him or even respect him again.

You closed your eyes and decided to go back to sleep. Let the great Armitage Hux have the surprise of the century when he realized you put Lux to share his bed — your bed.

However, as this thought came to life in your mind, you heard him stopping at the bed; a candelabrum cast a flickering light in the chamber.

“What’s the meaning of this?”

You did not raise your head from the pillow, unless you wanted to smile and blow your cover.

“Well…” you whispered back, your voice heavy with sleep. “He was having a nightmare and I thought you wouldn’t mind. It’s not like you get any sleep, to be honest.”

He retreated, heading back to the anteroom, and as much as you wanted to ignore him and let him sleep on the floor — you could not care less —, you could not control your urges.

You moved away from Lux carefully, placed the blankets over him and kissed his cheek lovingly before you followed your husband outside.

Closing the double doors behind yourself, you watched as he took a seat. You did not mimic him, you would rather stay on your feet and preferably away from him.

“I thought you liked the boy,” you started, using the word boy as he did in the past. With disdain. “Perhaps you only like him when he’s useful to you.”

He looked at you, eyes narrowed, but nothing left his lips.

His silence both stunned and angered you.

You expected him to say something.

Anything.

To agree.

To disagree.

To mock you.

To say you were a child.

He did neither.

“You are a hateful person,” you started, biting your bottom lip. You were on the verge of crying, but just like Lux — just like him — you were too damn stubborn to cry. “How can you do that? How could you?”

He stood on his feet, his furrowed brows made you want to slap him. You did.

Or at least tried to.

He held onto your wrists and pulled you to him.

You squirmed against him, but he did not you go. His breath tickled your skin; his five o’clock shadow brushed against your cheeks as he continued to hold you.

Before you realized, you were crying.

From anger.

Desperation.

Hate.

“I hate you.”

These words seemed to do the trick. He let go of you immediately, and you stumbled backwards, only to regain your balance seconds later.

“How can you send him away? To some overseas institution nonetheless?”

You could deal with Eton — you knew eventually Lux would have to part ways with both you and Rae —, they only accepted boys after their thirteenth birthday. He had to study. So why not Eton, one of the best institutions in your own country?

His reaction was quick.

You almost did not see it.

It was as if relief flooded him, before he stared at you with those impossibly blue eyes of his, his expression cold and filled with disgust.

“I refuse to have this conversation with you if you are to behave this childishly.”

A slap would have hurt less.

You felt your cheeks heating at his words.

“Childish behavior is yours that want to separate him from his—

“His what?” he hissed. He had invaded your personal space, towering over you. His stare was so intense, he could almost feel it burning you. “You are not his mother.”

It only served to push you further.

If he would not allow you to slap him — he would cage your wrists the moment you thought about it —, at least he would not see it coming. You spat on his face and if the situation were any different, you would have laughed at the look of pure revulsion on his eyes.

Before he could outline any reaction, a tiny sob drew both of your attentions to Lux. He was staring at you with chestnut eyes wide open.

He was not crying.

At least, he was not making a big deal of it.

But Lux was not a child used to see anyone fighting. It probably scared him — you were always scared when your father and your mother fought.

Casting a glance at Hux — it was obvious it was all his fault — you walked to Lux, but he refused to go to your arms. He did not go to Hux either.

In that very moment, someone opened the door. Your body tensed at the thought of his preceptress or any other servant catching you in such situation, but it was only Rae. A sigh left you as she entered the anteroom and offered a hand to Lux.

He ran to her, wrapping his arms around her legs.

You felt guilty when she patted his head in a very Rae-ish manner and looked at you. Even if you could not see very well in the darkened room, you could bet her eyes hid nothing of her disapproval of your actions.

She nudged him forward and when he was not in your sights, she said, her voice low and chilly,

“You are ridiculous. Both of you.”

There was silence between you.

For a couple of seconds.

Of minutes.

You did not now.

Both of you sat in the couch, side by side; thighs quite not brushing, but neither paid any attention to it.

He would not say anything.

You knew it. Even if he had changed a lot, his refusal to apologize when he thought he was right would never change — you wondered if he did apologize to those above him in the army. He used to apologize to your father quite often when he was a teenager; when the two of you were engaged. Most of times he was not wrong.

And when he was, it was usually because of your actions.

Begrudgingly, you breathed deeply through your nose and started, “Please don’t send him away.”

You expected him to take his time to reply. You were not ready to have him answering you so soon, nor the content of his words.

“You always expect the worst of me.”

What?

Your mouth hung open as you tried to come up with a reply. Nothing came to your mind. After a while staring at him with an expression of surprise — you bet you never looked so silly in all your life, you said,

“You never gave me any reason to expect otherwise.”

By his sharp intake of breath, you realized that this time, your words felt like a slap to his face. But what did he expect? What did he want of you? You were suddenly tired of this game — and you barely stared it!

“I love Lux,” you said, your voice small. “I can forgive anything, but I swear, Armitage, I will never forgive you if you take him from me.”

He gave you no answer, but his intense stare made you shudder. Armitage Hux was not a man of many words and certainly not one used to talk about feelings — his or otherwise —, but his eyes — when he did not hold the reins of his emotion so tightly — hid nothing of what was on his mind and heart.

At the moment, you could tell your words did not surprise him in the least. He seemed almost… reassured at them.

“I can take you bribing him and diverting his attention to you sometimes, but I won’t let you let him study overseas now.”

There was a small smile on his lips as he placed one of his hands on your face, removing a strand of hair from your eyes and placing it behind your ear.

“Stop smiling.” You slapped his hands away. It made his smile broaden. “It’s not funny.”

“I did not bribe the boy,” he smoothed his thumb over your bottom lip. Even if you fought against it, your heart accelerated.

“So he became boy again, huh?”

“I was getting to know him better.”

“Why?” You furrowed your brows. His small caresses did not matter now. You were so curious you would even kiss him if it meant he would answer your questions. Subconsciously, you looked up at his lips, taking your time on them. “I know you bribed him somehow. Lux hates you… Or he used to.”

There was silence on his part for a moment.

You knew he did not like it when you said Lux hated him.

Why?

It made no sense.

“He will go to Eton when he turns thirteen,” he said, pulling you into a kiss.

It was brief. Chaste. A mere brush of lips.

But this, coupled with the information and how regretful his eyes and tone seemed to you, had you gasping in his mouth.

He took that as an invitation to take your lips more properly. His hands moved on your back, bringing your body against his; your legs straddled his.

Still, even if your bodies were so close together, and the moment was very intimate, there was nothing sexual about it.

You entwined your fingers through his short hair and placed your forehead against his. Undoubtedly, that was the first moment of — peace? you did not even know how to put it — something between you.

“I did bribe him with sweets. He has a sweet tooth.”

“I knew it!”

There was a moment of silence. You closed your eyes and lowered your head to his shoulder, your hand moving back, till it settled against his heart. He placed his hand over yours, both of your fingers entwining together.

Your heart sped.

In that moment, you could swear he felt — if not love, at least something —, he cared for you.

“He likes toffee,” he whispered, against your hair and placed a kiss to your temples.

“He does,” you whispered back, a small smile gracing your lips.

He moved from the couch and took you in his arms. It elicited a light squeal from you. Without your permission, your thoughts went back to your first night together — he held you like this, your arms around his shoulders, your legs wrapped around his waist as he guided you to the bed.

When he lowered you onto the mattress, you did not let go of him. He settled between your legs, but he did not try anything. He did not move. His fingers traced your cheeks in a small caress that had you leaning against him.

“Why?”

There was no answer from his part. It was if he did not hear you. His right hand moved from the mattress and caressed the underside of your knee, his fingers moving slightly up towards your thighs.

“Why, can’t we always be like this?”

You caressed his face.

In the darkened room, you could not see it, but you could feel every plane of his chiseled jaw and sculpted nose. He was a very beautiful man. You remembered how he used to take your breath away when he merely cast a glance at you in the past.

You brushed your fingers against his lips, and the need to kiss him again was almost overpowering.

“Why can’t we stop fighting? Why can’t we just stop hiding things from each other? I wouldn’t be mad if you talked to me about sending Lux to Eton. I know he will have to leave someday, but… To hear it like that, as if you were playing with my feelings…” Your voice broke. “I can’t bear the thought of losing him right now.”

He did not reply.

Instead, he broke apart from you and sat on the bed.

It made you furrow your brows.

You thought you were having a moment… What happened to him?

“Why didn’t you tell me, (Y/N)? Why did you hide it from me?”

His voice was no more than a whisper.

But not a warm, welcoming whisper.

It was cold.

Devoid of any good emotion.

Enraged, even.

“Tell you what?” You sat on the bed as well and moved to touch him. He inched away. You furrowed your brows. What happened to that — peaceful? pleasant? — moment of before?

“He is mine. Lux is my son.”

A/N - That will be all for today. I hope you’ve liked this chapter. I honestly miss updating and writing this story, but as you well know, I’m rather busy with my thesis right now... So, bear with me ok? Soon there’ll be no thesis and I’ll be back to updating frequently xD

#hux x you #hux x reader #regency!hux #in the generals bed #in the general's bed #regency hux #regency story #general hux #armitage hux #general hux x you #general hux x reader #armitage hux x you #armitage hux x reader #sequels fanfic #sequels #star wars #fanfic #star wars fanfic #itgb

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ralphlayton · 3 years

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Inside B2B Influence: Brian Solis of Salesforce on the Future of Influence in B2B Marketing

If this is your first time, Inside B2B Influence is a podcast series that goes behind the scenes of B2B marketing and highlights insights with top business executives on influencer marketing for B2B companies. At TopRank Marketing we're doing our best to connect readers and listeners with B2B marketing insiders on strategies, trends, tactics and the future to elevate the practice of growing influence within and outside of B2B brands. In Episode 17 of Inside B2B Influence we have a returning guest who needs little introduction given his accomplishments and yet, we'd all be missing out if I did not mention that Brian Solis is Global Innovation Evangelist at Salesforce, an 8X best selling author, global keynote speaker, digital pioneer and has been a good friend for over 10 years. [caption id="attachment_30272" align="alignnone" width="500"] Lee, Valerie, Brian - 2008 (Photo: Brian Solis)[/caption] As someone who has been at the forefront of studying, innovating and practicing influence in the B2B business and technology world, I reached out to Brian for his thoughts on what the future holds for influence at B2B organizations inside and out, what to look for with business influencers and thoughts on how to scale influence. Highlights of episode 17 include:

Advantages influencer marketing creates for B2B brands in 2022

The most important qualities B2B brands should look for in influencers

The importance for B2B brands to grow influence from within

The next evolution of influence for B2B companies

What B2B companies should consider in order to scale influence

Take a listen to The Future of Influence in B2B Marketing with Brian Solis:

Transcript – Inside B2B Influence Episode 17: The Future of Influence for B2B Marketing

In the first ever research report on B2B influencer marketing, you shared that "in a time of darkness, chaos or confusion, B2B brands have an opportunity to be the light for their customers." As we finish off 2021 and head into another year of the pandemic, what kind of advantage does influencer marketing bring for B2B brands?

I think (B2B influencer marketing) is more important than it's ever been. @briansolis

Brian: I think it's more important than it's ever been and kudos to you for launching that first report. I understand that it was incredibly successful, so thanks for letting me be part of that. I'll try to connect the dots this way for those who are listening. At Salesforce, our mission is to help businesses, not just transform, but to be relevant and to thrive in what's going to be what I call, a novel economy. It's the word novel, like in novel coronavirus means new and unusual, and that means that we're heading into new years, a new genre of business without a playbook. When we take that stance, that means that we have to have a very solid position on how we're going to help you. What does business look like on the other side? What does every function look like on the other side? Marketing, sales and service? How do they all come together to essentially create the enterprise of the future right now? And so that's going to take a lot of work, a lot of thought leadership, a lot of content, a lot of video, a lot of articles, a lot of social media to reach those looking for insights - to connect the dots between valuable information and actions to those who need them.

We have all become marketers now. @briansolis

In that regard, you can't just have the ideas. You can't just have the solutions. You also have to have the ability to connect the dots between those ideas and people who need them. So, in a sense, we have all become marketers now. And I think that's a good thing. I think marketing itself becomes a much more value added, it rises in the ranks of helping to serve, I guess, is the best way to put it, Not just to market or promote or to gain eyeballs, but to serve people. I think it's like a call to arms or this enlightenment that gives us a greater sense of purpose, a more noble sense of purpose. So with that said, I have a lot to read, a lot to learn and relearn in these times because there's certainly a lot of really smart people out there. I'm just hoping to continue to, not just think about ways to help companies, but to also think about ways to reach people their way. And that has me "control alt deleting" a lot of assumptions, that's for sure. B2B marketers have learned many lessons from our B2C counterparts including what makes an influencer. B2B influencers are more than experts with industry credentials. They are increasingly creators as well. What are the qualities most important in an influencer that brands should look for? Brian: Oh, man, let's start with the question of what makes an influencer. You know, I think back to some of the conversations, how many years have we been having these really these awesome conversations? I really appreciate how long we've known each other. We've done a lot of really cool things together. I think this is a time where it's almost as exciting as when we first met. You remember? Social media was just coming together. It was just chaos. It was the wild west. And I think this is that time. I don't know that people are going to pick up that it's that time, but it really is. I want to call it out for this reason. What is an influencer? Because coming into 2022 I think we could all have these visions of some beautiful human being on a beach in Thailand. Somebody walking and seeing their back with their hand extended holding their hand. You know, that's what I think a lot of traditional marketers think about in terms of influencer marketing. I'm not going to knock it. It has been, for B2C, some of the most innovative, creative stuff that I've seen in a long time. There's nothing to say though, that when it comes to B2B that you can't be human being either. I think that's really where we should start thinking about this.

Every single day I get emails, "We need you to be part of this." Very rarely does someone take the time to read my work and then reach out and talk about ways that we might be able to collaborate. @briansolis

I too, have been the recipient of these types of requests. Every single day I get emails, "we need you to be part of this. We want to give you some content to publish. Can you make a video? Can you do this?" And it's simply because of the number of people who follow my work. Very rarely does someone take the time to read my work and then reach out and talk about ways that we might be able to collaborate, because there was some idea that they felt could help them connect the dots of markets they're trying to cultivate. That's where it starts: who are you trying to reach and why? And then building bridges between those people who have earned the trust of those that you're trying to reach, whether it's a macro influencer, certainly in the B2B world, there are people with a lot of followers, more followers than I'll probably ever have. And at the same time they have reached the micro influence that is so critical right now. The people that you trust because they will tell you something specific that you need to do and you believe that their insights are going to help you succeed in how you're measured for success. I'm a big believer in experimenting. So I'll experiment with the wide swaths and the big audiences. But I also want to experiment with direct outcomes. If we can together, do some work that helps people make better decisions or move markets or launch products that help other companies, then that's what I'm talking about. For example, I remember some of my greatest work in the past, aside from what I'm doing right now. So I don't know that I've ever had so much fun while having such an impact, was back in the day with Google when we launched, we introduced the concept of micro-moments. Micro-moments was our way of helping marketers understand that a mobile first customer does not go through the web journey like a traditional customer sitting in front of a big screen or a laptop journey. You have to think about TikToK or Snapchat versus amazon.com, right, in terms of how you go through that. The work that we did cast a wide net because Google is very good at that. My responsibility was the micro stuff. Can we beat the drum of micro influence by talking about micro-moments in every single aspect of how a customer goes through the journey and what they're missing and what they need from marketers, from digital marketers, from web marketers to create that ideal journey.

If I didn't have that audience, I would go build that audience. @briansolis

So, we talked about micro-moments, we talked about mobile first things. We talked about stats, we ran all kinds of research. We did micro-moments for travel, micro-moments for insurance and micro-moments for auto sales. I was a mad man during that first year to 18 months, every single day developing new content, putting it in the places that were going to reach those people. If I didn't have that audience, I would go build that audience. That was my life for a year and a half. And I think the result of that is that everybody knows about micro moments and it's still important after all of these years today. But that was the hard work, dedicated work of cultivating those communities, not just relying on somebody because they had the numbers. I think that in this post pandemic economy that's going to start taking shape, as soon as we can get people vaccinated, that the new world, that next normal needs more work like that. Not just intention to promote stuff, but to build stuff, to help those who are looking for insights, understand that we can build that playbook together.

What is your problem? How has the world changed and how can I help you? Go create (content) around that. @briansolis

I think there's a lot of people asking questions. There's a lot of people looking for help. For those influencers who are going to take the time to think about it, not just promote or say something, or try to get a lot of views or clicks or what have you. But to think about like honestly think about, what is your problem? How has the world changed and how can I help you? And then go create around that. That's the answer to your question. That's what makes an influencer and it's not even an influencer at that point. That's a business partner who's helping you and helping others solve problems and create opportunities. One of the significant trends we've seen with many enterprise B2B brands is growth of investment in building influence from within. This comes in the form of employee advocacy programs as well as building thought leadership and influence for key executives by collaborating on content with industry experts. How important is it for B2B brands to grow influence from within? Brian: Such a great question. I joined this company because I wanted to be part of this culture. The Ohana, it is a very special culture, They, we, I should say, believe in that employee advocacy and empowerment. Because the frontline for us are those individuals who are having to help our customers solve some pretty big problems and transform overnight like most companies that got hit in March, 2020 with remote work and e-commerce, and chat bots and automation, and all of the things that had accelerated roadmaps, digital transformation roadmaps by 10 years. So Mark Benioff, at our big corporate kickoff get together, he talked about how we all need to as individuals, as employees of the organization, not just sell technology, which is a really big thing for a CEO of a hyper-growth company to say. He was basically saying, he wants all of us to think about the outcomes that our customers are trying to solve for and the things that they don't know, that they need to solve for and go be that go be that person, go be that resource so that they can trust you beyond just being a sales person or a service person.

Employee advocacy is the belief in your people that they can provide solutions and help. @briansolis

That's a big call to all of us, right? Not just me and my colleagues who do this every single day, but for everybody. That's employee advocacy. It's the belief in your people that they can provide solutions and help, not just the things that are going to hit the bottom line. To build relationships, as my colleague Henry King, and I have written about it in a serious this last year, we talk about relationship transformation. What do you want the employee to do, or employees do in aggregate and as individuals? Well, essentially it's to build relationships. You know this better than anybody. You build relationships by adding value and consistently adding value.

Business outcomes are natural byproducts of investing in relationships. @briansolis

To do that, it means you have to understand what value looks like. Value is in the eye of the beholder. Then you train, you empower, you re-skill or skill to help people get there. And then you measure that because we're all in the relationship business. You measure the relationships that you want to see come to life. Then business outcomes are natural byproducts of investing in those relationships. So then it's not just a conversation. How can we empower employees to create, to share, to answer questions that maybe haven't been asked and to answer those questions en masse so that a lot of people find those answers. Essentially you build an infrastructure that can help create that type of advocacy. I think that's a pretty big deal, going beyond all of the apps to see, hey, what is it like to work there? You really start to invest in the culture where part of that culture is, you have smart people who are sharing smart things. I think that's part leadership, but also you need a program that isn't just about ghost writing for executives. It's really about giving a voice to the executive who actually believes in those things and scaling them. Thank you Brian! You can find Brian on Twitter, LinkedIn, his website and you can watch Brian along with his co-host John Kao and special guests on their Intersections show every Thursday morning at 10:30am PT. Be sure to stay tuned to TopRank Marketing’s B2B Marketing Blog for our next episode of Inside B2B Influence where we’ll be answering the B2B marketing industry’s most pressing questions about the role of influence in business to business marketing.

Have you taken the 2021 B2B Influencer Marketing Survey?

Help elevate the practice of influence in B2B marketing by sharing your experience and opinions about B2B marketing and working with influencers in our latest research project. The survey takes just 10 minutes and you'll not only get an advanced copy of our research report featuring insights from Brian Solis and an incredible mix of B2B industry experts, but we're also giving away some sweet incentives. Take the survey today though, because we'll be closing it down soon.

The post Inside B2B Influence: Brian Solis of Salesforce on the Future of Influence in B2B Marketing appeared first on B2B Marketing Blog - TopRank®.

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lurkinmerkin · 6 years

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So I’m doing some math (I’m terrible at it) but nonetheless, I did some thinking and then some subtraction and realized that it was in about 1998 that my family got a computer with Microsoft Windows installed along with a dial-up internet connection. And so this is technically my 20th anniversary of reading fanfic and being a part of internet fandom. I figured I should celebrate it a bit.

I don’t remember the exact date or time or whatever, I can barely add or subtract, so June seems like a good in the middle of the year kind of time to recollect and think about what I’ve been doing with my life. Think about why I read so much, why I reblog things, why I am the way I am.

This ask meme was written by @mabel-but-slytherin and I decided, I’ll just answer the whole damn thing. I’m sure absolutely no one is interested in this info but I don’t give a fuck. 20 goddamn years of my life in fandom, do you seriously think I give a fuck anymore? I don’t care about you or your eyes. I officially left the give a fuck building a long ass time ago.

If you have seen a fandom ask meme about being a lurker (which I was for a good ten years) or about reading fanfic instead of just writing fanfic, send it my way and I’ll answer it too. I have stories.

1. What was your first fic and could you stand to reread it today?

It was Thursday Night Routine and it’s readable but I find it a bit repetitive and out of character. Although, with Glee, how was I supposed to know who these people would become, lol. ;A;

2. What’s your most recent fic and how far do you think you’ve come?

My most recent was Vesper Lynde for the Spy fandom and I think I’ve grown as a writer but my characterization is still clumsy and my comedy isn’t as sharp. I think I was funnier before. I also have issues getting to the sex scene that I never had before. It drives me batty.

3. In your opinion, what’s your best fic?

The thoroughly depressing and out of nowhere for me fic, Ozma. That night was a eureka moment, it was bliss writing that fic. It flowed. I probably got the closest to american gothic and poetry with that fic--which is my usual goal when I do creative writing off the internet.

4. In your opinion and without looking at any numbers, what’s your most popular fic?

So much of what I wrote was done anonymously before AO3 and Tumblr so it’s hard for me to say but I’m gonna guess Everybody’s Pickin’ Up on that Feline Beat because the cat!boi thing really slapped. Like people loooooved the cat!boi thing in 2010.

5. Is there any fic that makes you super happy to reread and remember you wrote that?

Third is the One With the Treasure Chest. It has some issues but I still can’t believe I wrote it, like that was my third fanfic ever and it was a muppet babies’ orgy. I have no idea how I did it, :D

6. Is there any fic that makes you super embarrassed to reread and remember you wrote that?

Not really? I’m not embarrassed by what I write (I can’t be, I write weird shit), but I don’t necessarily want people to come up to me in real life and start describing my fic to me. Like I don’t want my realities to intersect. That’s what I’m really sure would embarrass me.

7. What’s the fic you most want to continue (unfinished or no)?

I’m not gonna finish it, like it’s not happening, but I kind of wish I had finished Look What You Made Me Do. I still noodle a about Sarah Plain and Tall Klaine story. I did a lot of research into Gilded era hair and fashions.

8. What’s the oldest (longest since last update) fic you most want to continue (unfinished or no)?

Probably the epically awful and creepy Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make me a Match where Sandy and Karofsky kidnap and assault Kurt. I was fascinated by how absolutely horrific Sandy Ryerson was as a character. He’s the worst. I’m not doing a sequel though. I’m not.

9. Have you ever written for a fandom without watching/reading/playing the source material?

Read? Yes. Written? No. I don’t think I’m the best at characterization but I do feel a need for a basic grasp on it before I start writing anything.

10. Have you ever written for a fandom without reading other fanfic for it?

I wrote Vesper Lynde before I read any of the fic which was probably a good thing because there are some really good fics out there that already cover the subject I did (and did it better). But I’m glad I wrote it anyway because I have so many feelings about Rayna and Susan.

11. Have you ever written a fic for a concept you know someone else has done before? How did it impact your writing process or feelings after posting?

I honestly don’t know so I’m going to say no. I have seen these stories after I wrote what I wrote and have thought, Oh I should have done that or why didn’t I think of that?, but I have never seen a fic beforehand and thought that I could do it better or different enough. I wrote fic in order to fill a gap of weird skullfuckery that was missing before I showed up.

12. Have you ever written a fic and decided never to publish it? Why?

Yes. It was bad, I wrote myself into a corner and had no interest in fixing it. The writing felt dull and flat. If I post an unfinished work, I do it because I think the writing has merit.

13. What’s the biggest change between your style when you started in fandom and today?

I write more original work now, I write poetry mostly nowadays. And fanfic I do write has been smaller vignette pieces, has had way less sex in it and minimal wacky shenanigans. I kind of want to go back to wacky shenanigans honestly.

14. What’s the biggest change in your taste between when you started in fandom and today?

I’m riding a girl swing this year so I’m way more interested in stories that involve cunnilingus and strap-ons, boob devotionals and short fingernails. I sort of got into that in the middle of my Glee career (the Golden Age) before swinging back to boys and their balls (the Modern Age). In this new Age, I’m back to ladies.

15. Have you ever purposefully written one fandom/fic idea over another because you knew it’d be more popular?

I think I tried to do that once but then I failed because my niche is being an off-beat weird motherfucker, not popular. I thought that I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman would go awf but instead it fizzled. So I stuck with dickpunching.

16. Have you ever stopped writing a fic/for a fandom because it wasn’t receiving enough attention?

No. I didn’t really get a lot of attention outside my circle anyway.

17. In your opinion, what’s your most overrated fic?

I guess the Cat!Kurt fic? I think it’s a good story, I just think that I wrote some that were better.

18. What’s your most underrated fic?

And if the world runs out of lovers, my Blaine/Finn fic. I had a lot of fun with that one and I think I got some really funny lines in.

19. If you had to pick one fic/scene/chapter of your work to describe your entire portfolio to a stranger, which would you pick?

I would say, They’re Both Just Full of Feelings, OK? which is a story were Puck and Mercedes get very drunk, complain about their homosexual tendencies and then motorboat each others tiddies. I feel like that about covers the gist of my aesthetic.

20. Have/Would you ever rewrite a fic? If yes, would you take the original down?

I am doing a slow ass sloow rewrite of As Needed, just some clean up of tense issues and little nudges here and there of some of the wording. And I will take down the original when I do that. It needs better grammar, it does.

21. If someone starts kudosing and commenting your fics in a spree and has a few works of their own, would you go look through theirs?

Yes. I love spying and I love other people’s bookmarks. I keep mine private because I’m a hypocrite and I don’t know how to make them public en masse. I am not doing that individually.

22. Has there ever been anyone who’s made you freak out because they read your work and followed/favorited/reviewed?

No, but I freak out at every follow/favorite/review regardless. There are people who I love love love but they aren’t in the fandoms I write in so I never expect to have an insane fangirl moment like that.

23. What’s the nicest review you’ve ever gotten?

When I wrote Ozma, someone on the kinkmeme said that it read like a contemporary short story and I was flattered!

24. What’s the meanest review you’ve ever gotten? Do you think the reviewer intended it?

25. What constructive criticism, however well-meaning, always makes you feel bad when you see it in a review?

Gosh, that’s tough. I’m gonna go with criticisms that question your intent? Like when someone goes, “Did you mean to say this or that?” but not because it makes me feel bad but more because it makes me feel like I didn’t get my point across clearly enough that the reader could make their own conclusions about what was happening. I am very much of the author is dead style and part of that is leaving enough there to satisfy the reader without giving it all away.

26. What aspect of your writing do you most enjoy to see praised?

My humor. I like it when people find me funny. I don’t feel like my humor makes sense a lot of the time. Also, when people say that they re-read my stories. That’s always a heart warmer.

27. If you could only ever write crossovers or single-fandom fics ever again, which would you pick?

I prefer single-fandom fics as a writer. Crossovers get messy for me, too many locations to choose from.

28. if you could only ever write for a single crossover or a single fandom again, which would you pick?

Schitt’s Creek. David/Patrick 4eva!

29. Does the division of your writing across fandoms line up with your reading? What’s the biggest discrepancy?

Absolutely not, LMAO! I have done way more reading than writing in any fandom. My participation is a pebble on a mountainside.

30. Do you continue to write for a fandom after you’ve moved on or do you focus solely on the new one?

I wrote Glee fic (and I am still working on As Needed) after I had moved on from the show but a lot of us did. My attention span allows me to multifandom.

31. Who’s the one character you’ve just never managed to get perfectly right?

Susan Cooper. She’s an enigma.

32. Who’s the one character who shines without you even trying?

Puck, I feel like I wrote a very solid Puck.

33. Is there any particular character whose scenes always wind up being longer/more frequent than you expected? Does the quality hold up?

I would guess Brittany but I don’t think the quality holds up. I liked writing Brittany but I don’t think I captured her essence.

34. Was there any fic that you wrote that really surprised you in the fandom reaction? Was it just by the numbers or did they take it an entirely different way?

I get a lot of requests for a sequel to Sex Bomb even to this day and it surprises me.

35. Have you ever written a ship into a fic without meaning to?

No, I was ready to write anyone with anyone in any fic. I love it.

36. Have you ever sincerely written a ship you do not support into a fic?

Don’t support? Well, I don’t support Kurt/Karofsky but I write non-con fic so...

37. Have you ever purposefully bashed a character/ship in a fic?

I would only in an in-character sense, like the character would be against that pairing because of the show dramatics. At least, that was always my intent.

38. Have you ever purposefully written something you know your readers would find uncomfortable/would not enjoy? If yes, why?

Because that’s how the glee_anon meme worked sometimes LOL. Sometimes, you gotta have the anal worm lay the eggs.

39. Do you consider yourself to have a readership?

Not anymore lol, if I ever did. I don’t write enough.

40. Do you feel like you put out enough content?

I peaked with the Muppet Babies’ orgy, that was my third fic. Everything else was gravy.

41. If you cross-post your fics on multiple sites, do you have a favorite? Are there certain fics you would only post on certain site?

I want all my fics on AO3 largely because I think livejournal is gonna die soon and tumblr is unsearchable and lacks a forum function.

42. How many views has your most popular fic gotten?

(Based on AO3): Ozma at 28672 Hits

43. Your least popular?

(Based on AO3): There’s a Lobster Involved at 38 Hits

44. Do you follow/favorite/kudos/comment/review more stories than you have received?

Oh gosh, I never thought of it that way but I hope I at least kudos more than I’ve received! I don’t have that many bookmarks and I don’t review and I rarely comment (I’m more like to DM you) but I do leave kudos a lot.

45. If you had to call yourself an author of a single genre (besides fanfic) what label would you give yourself?

With my original works: poetry. With my fanfic works: absurdism

46. Do you consider yourself a diverse author?

Yeah, I think I covered a wide range of topics and styles along with a lot of different characters. I had humor, drama, horror, angst, slice of life, porn, I covered a lot of ground.

47. If someone you know in real life who isn’t involved in fandoms asked to read your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you recommend they read first?

NO.

48. Does anyone you know from outside of fandom know you write fanfic? Are they involved in the same fandom too?

Yes, they know and they were also Glee fans but not necessarily fanfic readers. Just how much they know will remain a mystery between us because they won’t tell me and I won’t ask them to tell me. I don’t need that knowledge and I don’t want it.

49. Has anyone in your life ever read your fanfic just because you wrote it?

NOT THAT I KNOW OF AND I DON’T WANT THEM TO TELL ME IF THEY DID. KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.

50. Has writing fanfic had a significant impact on your life? Would you say it’s entirely positive?

I have an absolutely incredible circle of friends that I would not have had without fandom. So many people that I know out of fandom don’t spend as much time on the internet, they aren’t as easy to reach as my internet friends. You guys give me your time and your energy and that means so much to me. It really does.

I wouldn’t say my time in fandom has been 100% positive. There are always downfalls to being in a large group. I have had my moments of internet drama, on anon trolling, and bad feelings. But my friends make it all worth it. You guys are the best.

#fandom #fuck glee #merkintosh #lurkinmerkin #ask meme #anniversary

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tanmath3-blog · 7 years

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Justin Park aka.. J.R. Park is one of the friendliest people I have ever met. He always has a smile and is willing to help anyone that he can. He also can spin a great horror story. Some of the most suspenseful and chilling stories I have read have been his. If you haven’t read one of his books please make sure that you do. He is extremely talented. He is also part of the Sinister Horror Company where he works with various authors publishing and editing and making beautiful books. If you haven’t met Justin you are missing out on a really amazing friend and writer. Please take the time to read one of his books you won’t regret it!

Please welcome J.R. Park back to Roadie Notes…………

1. It’s been awhile since we talked what new books do you have out now? Latest release? I’ve had a number of new releases. The Offering: An Introduction To The Sinister Horror Company is a short story collection by myself and Daniel Marc Chant, with a fantastic foreword by George Anderson. Death Dreams In A Whorehouse is a short collection of my own. I’ve been selling it at conventions but it hasn’t been ‘properly’ released online yet. I expect I’ll release it before the end of the year, but haven’t firmed up a date yet. Postal was a book co-written with Matt Shaw. This was a great book to write. Matt came up with an initial concept. I threw some ideas at him around it and he went off and wrote his part, whilst at the same time coming up with the structure of the book. He left me a lot of room to play and to add more ideas and concepts to the mythology. It turned out really fun (in a horror sense) and has had a great reaction since its release. Mad Dog is my latest novella, a book that can be summed up as: werewolf in a prison break. It’s told from a series of interviews by survivors of the incident and is full of the spills and thrills of a pulp book/b-movie.

2. If you could pick any author alive or dead to have lunch with who would it be? Why?

So many to choose from…so many. I think I’d go with William Burroughs. I don’t know a lot about the man, but he seems to have been a fascinating, and his voice is strangely hypnotic. I could listen to him tell me strange stories of his life for hours.

3. What is the strangest thing a fan has ever done?

I’ve been sent an embroidered handkerchief once. I’m an advocate of handkerchief use, and I usually add one in every book I write. I won’t say what was on, but if you’ve read Upon Waking you might get an idea…

4. What is the one thing you dread to do when writing?

Unconscious theft. When you’re exposed to so much, it’s okay to be influenced, but sometimes you can rip something off wholesale and you the worst thing is you can be halfway through before you notice. Another pain is if you come up with a great and work on something only for someone else to come up with the same idea. It hasn’t happened to me yet, but I have seen it happen, and it’s an awful position to be in.

5. Did you have imaginary friends growing up? Tell me about them

I did. It was an imaginary dog called Stripe (named after the Gremlin). The dog was small but not a real breed. It had neon fur, big teeth and a silver mohawk. I used to take him on walks with me, and secretly held his lead so others couldn’t see. My imaginary friend was my secret.

6. Do you go to conventions? If not why?

I really enjoy going to conventions. Because I go as part of a publishing company I don’t get invited as a guest and therefore have to pay for a pitch etc. This means with all the associated costs I never make my money back, but that’s not the point. It’s real fun to meet old fans and make new ones. Meet up with other horror fans and have a laugh. I usually spend more money than I make, but I just can’t help myself. Artifacts from conventions adorn my writing desk – a unicorn, a mask of a nazi zombie of American Werewolf In London… The craziest journey to get to a convention was in Dublin during 2016. Myself and Matt Shaw took a bus and ferry. We travelled all day and night, arriving at the convention an hour before it was due to start. We were so tired and then had to endure the Game Of Thrones theme on loop as we were pitched next to their stand. I think we both left that weekend slightly more deranged.

7. How many times did you have to submit your first story before it was accepted?

I never did! I went into self-publishing with my first book. I decided to let the critics guide me through reviews. So far it’s turned out okay. I’ve only subbed to a few other publishers. I had a rejection this year for a short story, and I was okay with that. They had a vision for their book and my story didn’t fit in with it – no problem. Another publisher moved their submission date without telling me. They brought it forward. It was a real shame as I had set up a writing schedule in date order. I really wanted to sub for the book and was gutted when they suddenly had the book filled. It’s being treated this way that puts me off working with other publishers. But you can’t let one bad experience stop you from working with others; and on the whole they have been pretty good.

8. Ever consider not writing? If so what made you continue?

I enjoy writing, and in some capacity I always will. Sometimes my creative energy will be spent elsewhere; maybe making films or writing music. But I’ve always enjoyed writing and never go anywhere with at least a pen and pad on me.

9. Ever thought about writing in a different category?

Yeah, very much so. I was writing poetry before I started writing horror, and I may go back to that. I love how one line of poetry can disarm you, so much more than a whole passage of prose in a book. It’s like concentrated emotion. Boil everything down. Strip the words back further and further until you’re left with the essence. That’s powerful stuff. I’ve also considered writing a different way. I write horror under the name J. R. Park. Why? Because it’s me, but not all of me. It’s only a part of me. To write under my full name Justin Park, it would have to be a full expression of me; unconfined from any particular genre. I’m currently reading a number of non-horror books and so we’ll see what influence these may have.

10. Any new additions to the family?

Not for me. I live in a shared house, much the same way as I did when I left University. I know at my age most people have settled down with a partner and live with them. Maybe they have a dog or cat. Maybe a child or two. I used to think there was something wrong with me for not living like that. Like I was some kind of failure. Of course that’s nonsense. There’s more than one way to live your life, and this is the way I’m living mine.

11. What is coming up next for you?

All planned book releases are out for the year. I am considering releasing Death Dreams At Christmas – a collection of Christmas horror stories. I love Christmas so it would be nice to get involved in the festive season. The other thing that I have coming up is the production and release of the Sinister Horror Cards. Based on Top Trumps, it’s an idea I had ever since I started writing. We are halfway through the art production at the moment and they are looking beautiful.

12. Do you do release parties? Do you think they work?

I don’t, so I don’t know if they work. I attended one once, and my Facebook feed got so full I couldn’t keep up. So as a reader and horror fan I didn’t like them, so I won’t do them for my own books. I’ve donated some books as prizes for other’s launch parties, but it’s not something I’d interested in. I’m sure it works for other people, and good luck to them. I think I’d rather have a real party. If I could set up an annual horror party that would be fun. Currently there are meet ups like FCON which has a good gathering of authors and readers.

13. Do you have crazy stalker fans? Have you ever had one you wish would go away? You haven’t made it until you’ve got a stalker. Thankfully, I haven’t made it yet.

14. Do you still have a “day job” ? If so what do you do?

I do. I work for the Government. I can’t tell you anymore; if I did, I’d have to kill you…

15. What is your process for writing? Do you have a voice in your head?

I usually start with a scene of two. These make pivotal points in the story. Then a write a paragraph describing the story. I expand it to a page with a beginning and end. Then I brainstorm to work out more detail before writing a chapter by chapter plan. Each chapter have notes that last a page and a half. It’s stream of consciousness so it can veer from notes to lines of dialogue to actual prose that gets used in the book. I do this so when I start writing I don’t accidentally write myself in a corner. I have read many books with unnecessary chapters and events that hold no relevance to the plot and I’m left wondering what was the point other than padding. It’s like an author starting writing a bit because they thought it was cool and then got bored, wrapped it up and carried on in a different direction. I decent editor would take those pages out, and it annoys when plots meander with no purpose. I like my stories to be well thought out from the start. ‘Not a word wasted’ is a comment I’ve received on a couple of times; and that makes me proud. Anyway… once I’ve got the plan I’ll write out chapter by chapter. Things may change and alter in that process, but I make notes as I go. Flow is important to me, and although I don’t have a voice in my head, I actually read a lot of my own work back aloud. This helps to get the feel of the flow, and find out if there are any cumbersome sentences that need re-working.

16. Is there a book you want to make a sequel to you haven’t yet?

I’d be tempted to write sequel to many of my books. Punch would be great to have a follow-up as there is a dangling plot thread no one notices that I’d love to tie up – mainly just to point it out, and then everyone will go ‘oh yeah’. The Exchange has a mighty follow-up swirling around my head. It involves many creatures and weird things. Think occult-style Star Wars. There’s also an idea for a follow-up to Mad Dog. Most likely called Mad Man, it will take the themes and styles of Mad Dog and push them to their inevitable conclusion.

You can connect with Justin Park here:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JRParkAuthor/?fref=ts

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/J.-R.-Park/e/B00OL04SD0/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_3?qid=1504592405&sr=8-3

Website: http://sinisterhorrorcompany.com/

Some of Justin Park’s books:

Getting even more personal with Justin Park Justin Park aka.. J.R. Park is one of the friendliest people I have ever met. He always has a smile and is willing to help anyone that he can.

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