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leejihoonownsmyheart · 1 year

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Pathetic (M)

(I did not edit this picture. Weverse literally just dropped it and I’m so lazy)

Title: Pathetic

Part one of the Pathetic series

Summary:

When your best friend Jeongyeon drags you to a frat party, you aren’t expecting much. Certainly not to be fucked dumb by notorious man whore Yoon Jeonghan, but hey, what happens at a frat party, stays at a frat party.

Simplified tags: 6k words, Porn with Plot, frat boy!Jeonghan, college student!y/n, best friend!Jeongyeon, soft!dom to hard!dom Jeonghan, mean!Jeonghan (and y/n loves it), submissive!y/n, female!y/n (sorry gender-neutral friends), heavy degradation, light masochist!y/n, sadist!Jeonghan, mild pain kink, vaginal fingering, creampie, spitting, slapping, big dick!Jeonghan, blowjob, mentions of aftercare but I don’t write it happening he just says what he’ll do

Warnings: This fic is filthy, dub con (I personally think that the consent is explicit enough but I’m tagging it this way just to be careful since it is intense), Jeonghan is a fiend. There is spitting, a creampie, degredation, like Jeonghan calls you pathetic. You thank him for him treating you like trash. There is after care but there is also light slapping, I’m serious this is literally the filthiest thing I have ever written. I’m embarrassed to have written it, and I hope that the five people who like things like this enjoy it. Jeonghan starts off as a soft!dom, but quickly turns to a hard!dom

I have this... secret blog that I wrote one story on cause I was embarrassed by it and didn’t want it to be on this blog and on that blog I asked if anyone wanted this kind of fic and I had like twelve people like the post so here we go.

“Really Jeonghan? Another fling that you just dropped for no reason?” Seungcheol asked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. Jeonghan hummed as he placed another lego block together, glancing over at the instructions for the house that he was building.

“Just not a good fit.”

“And by that he means she couldn’t handle him,” Soonyoung pipped up, unhelpfully. Seungcheol sighed.

“What is he? A monster in the bedroom?”

“Have you not heard him with people?” Jihoon asked, a look of disgust on his face as he handed Jeonghan the next lego brick he needed. “They’re sluts, all of them- and I don’t mean that in a derogatory way, he calls them that.”

Seungcheol seemed surprised, but Jeonghan didn’t bat an eye at the accusations.

“They like it, but not as much as I want them to,” Jeonghan replied with a sigh. “This last girl... She doesn’t listen, and not in a cute brat way. She just chases her orgasm and that’s good enough for her.”

Soonyoung snorted.

“Isn’t it enough that you’re able to make her orgasm?”

A smirk spread over Jeonghan’s lips.

“I make everyone I sleep with orgasm.”

“Topic change, topic change,” Seokmin requested desperately from where he was lounging on the couch. The room fell silent for a little bit, but Seungcheol’s curiosity wasn’t going to be quelled just yet.

“You’ve been blowing through fuck buddies for months and you haven’t found a single one that you want to keep. What makes you think you are ever going to find this perfect...” He trailed off, not sure how to finish it.

“Whore,” Jihoon finished. They all looked at him. He shrugged. “He wants the perfect whore. Literally.”

“Desperate for my cock, desperate for my cum...” Jeonghan sighed. “Desperate to cum, but only if I say so. Obedient, and desperate and sloppy-”

“I am begging for a topic change,” Seokmin interrupted. “It’s bad enough we have to hear Jeonghan fucking people-”

“I’m just saying. It doesn’t seem like you’ll be able to find the perfect person-” Jihoon cleared his throat and Seungcheol sighed. “The perfect whore. Why don’t you just settle?”

“The problem isn’t that the perfect whore doesn’t exist,” Jeonghan replied. “It’s that I’ve been looking in the wrong places. I’ll find them. It just takes time.”

“Yay, conflict resolution,” Seokmin cheered humorlessly. “So that means I can go back to my book and you all can go back to your legos and we can talk about next weeks party and not Jeonghan finding the perfect whore.”

A little laugh spread throughout the room and finally Seungcheol allowed the topic to go towards what other frats and sororities to invite to the party.

“I want you to go over this again with me, very slowly,” you said, your eyebrows narrowing at Jeongyeon. She gave you a bright smile, brushing back her bob.

“I want you to come with me to a frat party,” Jeongyeon said slowly. You gave Jeongyeon an unamused look.

“A frat party?” You repeated humorously.

“Not just any frat party,” Jeongyeon continued just as brightly. “Phi Mu Alpha Sinfonia’s party.”

You groaned, but she wasn’t having it.

“Come on! You know that Jimin hates Phi Mu Alpha Sinfonia and he never goes to their parties.”

“You and Jimin’s thing is-”

“Infuriating?” Jeongyeon grumbled.

“Stupid,” you corrected.

Jeongyeon and Jimin were two people impossible to be around. Because their hatred for one another didn’t stop at talking smack about one another behind their backs. It didn’t stop at shooting insults at one another in person. It didn’t even stop at Jimin railing Jeongyeon in the dorm room with you in your bed trying desperately pretend like it wasn’t happening.

Jeonyeon and Jimin hated each other to a point where their frustration could only be culled by rough sex every few weeks, and you were desperate for the two to evolve past that.

“Come on, I know that you don’t want me to fuck around with Jimin tonight, and who knows maybe I’ll go home with someone different from Phi Mu if we go there tonight,” Jeongyeon pleaded.

“I’d prefer if you didn’t go home with anyone,” you replied. “I’ll have to find somewhere else to go and-”

“We’ll find someone for you too!” Jeonyeon replied enthusiastically. “Then we both will go home with someone and it will be perfect!”

You pressed your lips together firmly, a clear indication that you weren’t convinced but Jeonyeon grabbed you, hugging your arm.

“Please, the boys at Phi Mu are so handsome. Surely, you’ll find someone you like,” she insisted.

You sighed as you looked at your friend, realizing that your hopes of studying for the night were completely over.

“Doesn’t everyone call them Alpha Mu boys?” You asked. Jeongyeon rolled her eyes.

“Same diff,” she mumbled. “Come on. You’re not going to just make me go alone are you?”

“I’m not wearing heels,” you said finally.

Your heels clacked against the wooden floorboards of the frat house as Jeongyeon practically dragged you through the house. She had the cutest outfit on. A pink dress that resembled that of a loosely torn shirt, with a corset to cause a bit of a silhouette and a pair of heeled white boots on top of it all. That along with her radiant smile she looked like a punk angel. You had tried to match her in ways, sticking with a corset and a loose shirtish dress. You had a choker on that resembled a collar (at her insisting) and regrettably you were wearing a lacy pair of lingerie. Just in case, as Jeongyeon would insist.

You sighed, the thought of being here still being mildly annoying. Frat parties themselves were frustrating. Loud, crowded, sweaty. But on the Brightside Alpha Mu parties had music produced and mixed by Lee Jihoon, so while loud it was bearable.

Jeongyeon practically knew all of the Alpha Mu boys. You wondered idly who she was trying to find tonight. She dragged you up to one of the boys- tall and lanky, and grabbed his arm to get his attention.

“Jun,” she whined. He looked at her over his shoulder, eyes lighting up when he saw her.

“You made it!” He said excitedly. His eyes flickered over to you. “You brought y/n!”

“You said you had someone for her!” Jeongyeon replied, both of their voices extremely loud as to hear one another over the music. “Someone good?”

Your eyebrows widened.

“Wait, you set me up?” You blurted. Jeongyeon didn’t even look upset.

“Of course, I did! I didn’t make you wear lingerie just to socialize all night!” She said. Your face flushed red, but Jun didn’t seem to care about the fact that he now knew what you were wearing under your clothes. Instead, he pointed away from the two of you.

“I’ll be right back,” he said. “I just need to grab him, okay?”

Jeongyeon nodded.

“Okay! We’ll be here!”

“I don’t want to be set up!” You insisted as soon as Jun was far enough that you didn’t think he would hear, which... Wasn’t that long.

“That’s what single people always say,” Jeongyeon said with a roll of her eyes. ”Jun said that you’re really going to like this guy! And that way you have less to do on your end so I can spend as much time as I want trying to find someone for me to spend the night with.”

“You should just go home with Jun,” you said with a roll of your eyes. “I mean it’s not like you guys haven’t fucked bef-”

“Y/n-” Jun’s voice called out over the sound. You looked up to find Jun standing there with someone else. You smiled at him.

“Uh, hi,” you called over the noise of the party.

“Hi, I’m Chan!”

You smiled at the person in front of you politely, noticing that behind Chan, Jun was talking to someone else, who looked notably annoyed. Your eyebrows strewn slightly at the man and for a second you caught one another's eyes. He looked away from you after a moment, his eyes peering at you from under the long strands of his hair.

After only a second, you turned your attention back to Chan. You figured you might as well get this over with.

Chan was... Nice, but that was about it. As awful as it was getting to know anyone at a loud party, you weren’t exactly thrilled to have to yell at him as he drank beer after beer.

You stuck to water but after a while you just couldn’t stand it anymore. You politely made an excuse to get away from him, saying that you were tired and you wandered up the stairs of the house, not wanting to admit to Jeongyeon that the guy that Jun had set you up with just simply wasn’t a match and you wanted to leave.

As you wandered the rooms upstairs, you walked past closed doors in which you could hear moans. You sighed in frustration. At least someone was going to get laid tonight. It seemed like your lingerie really wouldn’t be of any use tonight.

You entered the first empty bedroom that you could find. A king size bed with fluffy blankets in the center of room, a bookshelf with pictures of boys on the shelves, and paintings and the walls. You hummed and began to look around, the sound of the party muted behind the walls of the room.

You finally thought that you had found some peace.

“What are you doing?” A voice asked. You glanced over your shoulder, sighing when you saw the person from earlier. The one who looked annoyed when you had first met Chan. Your eyebrows rose slightly at him.

“Escaping the party.” You paused for a moment your lips pursing and your head falling to the side slightly. “Escaping Chan.”

“You don’t like Chan?” The person asked.

“No I like Chan, I just...” You trailed off.

“Not the sort of person you put on a matching set for?” The person piped up, a small smile crossing his lips as he spoke. You rolled your eyes.

“Sure,” you said, even though- He was right. Chan seemed too nice to be someone that was going to rail you to sleep that night. Regardless, of how attractive he was. As you looked around the room, you noted that the man at the door wasn’t backing down. Instead his eyes were drifting, making their way across your body.

You couldn’t really say you didn’t like the attention.

In fact, while Chan had been handsome, with his long chiseled face, and parted hair, this man was a whole other kind of attractive. He was pretty. His hair was long and wavy, falling past his ears, and yet not touching his shoulders. As your eyes trailed past his pink lips and down to where his shirt lay, just barely covering one of his collarbones. You looked back up at him, to see that he had definitely noticed your interest.

You looked away from him.

“Sorry am I in your room?” You asked him, clearing your throat.

“Yeah,” he commented. “It was getting a bit too loud for me out there too. I was going to close my room door.”

You glanced back at him and he gestured towards the door knob.

“You’re welcome to stay, of course.”

You knew what he meant and your intention in coming out tonight hadn’t really been to get laid. Sure, you had humored Jeongyeon. You had dressed the part, and said the right things but you knew from the minute that you looked at Chan you were going to be spending the night with your vibrator.

But... There was something about this guy.

You shrugged.

“If you don’t mind the company,” you replied. The man hummed and closed the door behind him with a click.

“Jeonghan,” he said, gesturing to himself.

Jeonghan...? You had heard his name from Jeonyeon before.

“Ah, the same one with a different fling every week?” You said, before you could really think over what you had said. Jeonghan hummed and walked over to his closet.

“So you’ve heard of me.”

“A few things,” you replied back. “That you don’t stick in one place for long.”

“But I always get positive reviews,” Jeonghan replied. As he spoke, he took the hem of his shirt, lifting it over his head. Your eyes widened in surprise at the sudden appearance of his six pack. Your cheeks flushed red and you looked away suddenly.

Fuck, he was hot.

“Sorry, it’s hot in here,” Jeonghan said. You heard his hangers clanging softly, and after a few moments they stopped, you looked back at him but he was still standing there shirtless, looking theatrically stumped. “And with nothing better to put on.”

He shrugged and walked over to his bed, taking a seat at the edge. He gestured to your outfit.

“You’re dressed nice... Like Jeongyeon.”

“She’s my best friend,” you replied pointedly. You leaned forward slightly, your fingers slightly dragging up the corner of your skirt. You tried to play it off as accidental, just a brush up of your skirt that would flash the corner of your lacy underwear.

You could tell that Jeonghan knew it wasn’t accidental.

“You want to play a game?” Jeonghan asked. You shrugged offhandedly.

“Depends on the outcome.”

“Come here,” Jeonghan said softly. You looked at him from across the room, your eyebrows raised.

“Why should I?” You asked. His lips quirked up slightly.

“If you do, you’ll get to cum, and if you don’t...”

He knew he didn’t have to finish that threat.

You walked over to Jeonghan, coming between his knees. His hands fell to your sides, squeezing your hips slightly as you raised your hands to his shoulders. You swallowed thickly at the proximity of the two of you.

“Tell me what you want,” Jeonghan said. Your nose scrunched slightly, mostly in embarrassment.

“I want you to fuck me,” you said softly. The smile that spread across Jeonghan’s face was one of pure delight.

“Really?” He asked, his voice riddled with surprise. His fingers dipped below the hem of your shirt and his fingers daintily brushed over the lace of your lingerie. You shivered a little under his touch, your fingers gripping at his shoulders a little bit tighter. “You really want some stranger to fuck you upstairs at a frat party?”

The degrading chide in his voice made your cheeks flare up even more. You cleared your throat, your eyes trailing away from him.

“Well, if your reputation proceeds you, I would love to be one of your...” You mumbled. Your face blazed even redder. “Sluts.”

One of Jeonghan’s fingers raised to your face, tilting your chin towards you. His eyes flickered down to your lips.

“Don’t worry love, I’ll treat you just the way that you deserve.”

Jeonghan’s fingers lowered to your throat, his hand making it’s way to the back of your neck.

“You’re so pretty,” he mumbled. “Just pretty enough for someone like Chan. You look so delicate.”

“I’m not delicate,” you murmured back, but the praise itself was making it hard to keep eye contact with Jeonghan.

“No?” Jeonghan breathed. He was so close to you that both of your breaths were intermingling. His grip on your neck was tight. “Is that why you didn’t want to spend the night with Chan? You want someone to rough you up? Someone to treat you like a little whore?”

You couldn’t help the airy moan that left your lips at the sound of the word.

“Do you want me to kiss you?” Jeonghan asked you. You nodded, feeling yourself growing closer to him as his fingers ran closer to your core over the lace of your panties.

“I’m going to need some words from you,” Jeonghan said seriously, his other hand tightening around the back of your neck. “Or else you’re going to get jack shit from me.”

“I do,” you said immediately. “I want you to kiss me.”

He pressed hard on the back of your neck, pressing you closer to his lips until they had crashed together. Despite how gentle Jeonghan had started off, the kiss was when he started to show his true colors. You whined against his lips as he forced his tongue into your mouth, pressing you closer to him.

He pulled you off of him, smiling when you leaned forward, desperate for his lips again. He hummed, his fingers dipping down underneath the hem of your lingerie, and he pressed his fingers down to your clit. You whined, throwing your head back.

“F-fuck,” you mumbled, rolling your hips towards Jeonghan. “I really fucking need this. Jeongyeon has been hammering sex into my head all day.”

“Yeah? You really that starved for sex?”

You nodded, leaning forward to catch Jeonghan’s lips again but he didn’t give you the satisfaction. He pulled back.

“No,” he chided. “You’re a bit needy aren’t you?”

You whined in response as Jeonghan’s fingers slid past your clit, to your already wet folds. He shook his head.

“Chan get you like this?” He asked. “Even though he was too vanilla for you, he is very attractive. Did he make you needy? Would you have resorted to your vibrator tonight thinking about him? Wishing he would treat you the way you want to be treated?”

As Jeonghan spoke he worked one of his fingers into you, his long fingers pushing deeper inside of you than your own fingers could. You whined, shaking your head.

“N-No,” you murmured. “It wasn’t him.”

Jeonghan hummed again, like he didn’t really believe you, so you continued.

“You made me like this,” you insisted. Your fingers tightened on Jeonghan’s shoulders, and your eyes lowered to Jeonghan’s lap where you could see a tent in his sweatpants. When you glanced back up Jeonghan didn’t seem very convinced. “How am I supposed to respond to the way you’ve been treating me?

Jeonghan scoffed.

“You should be fucking humiliated,” Jeonghan replied. “You’re doing everything I want you to, taking every single thing I give you-” As Jeonghan spoke he pushed another finger into your pussy, causing a small, pleasurable burn to run through your body. “I bet you’d even thank me for it. Are you going to thank me for fingering your stupid wet cunt?”

Your face blazed but you nodded obediently.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, your voice quivering as soft moans slipped from your mouth.

“Thank you for what?” Jeonghan asked. Your eyes fluttered down, and Jeonghan crooked his fingers deep inside of you.

“Thank you for f-fingering me,” you said, your eyes shooting back up to Jeonghan’s. He smiled.

“Good girl,” he praised. “But you don’t really deserve this, you know that?”

You whined as he shoved a third finger inside of you. His pace was fucking agonizing. His fingers slowly spreading your pussy... Hopefully so that it was ready for his cock.

“At least, you haven’t really proven yet that you deserve this,” Jeonghan amended. He slipped his fingers from you and your whine was cut off by Jeonghan sticking his fingers into your mouth. You immediately sucked them clean, moaning around them. He hummed again, seeming to still be unsure of exactly what to make of you. His hand gently pressed against your stomach, pressing you backwards.

“Get undressed, I want to see you.”

As you began to take your clothes off (struggling immensely with the corset that you had barely gotten on in the first place), Jeonghan stood up as well. Your eyes stayed glued to his chest until he lowered his sweatpants down and kicked them away to reveal his cock.

You faltered in your ministrations, your mouth dropping when you saw the size of Jeonghan’s cock. God, you had never slept with anyone bigger than Jeonghan. Never even imagined you would see a cock as big as his. You felt greedy, you wanted to have his cock inside you immediately, but you did your best to keep that to yourself. You quickly regained consciousness and finished tossing your clothes to the floor.

You stood there for a moment, letting Jeonghan look at you silently, his eyes trailing up and down your body, the smallest hint of a smile crossing his lips.

“God, you may be a pathetic slut, but you are absolutely gorgeous,” he said. He pointed down to the floor in front of his spread legs and then leaned back on his hands. “Come on. Show me what you can do. Show me that you’re not just a waste of time.”

You immediately dropped to your knees, squeezing yourself between his legs, your hands wrapping around the base of his cock. You stared at it for a second, just admiring his cock, before suddenly remembering what you were supposed to be doing.

You sucked the tip of his cock into your mouth, moaning around it, just relived to have a cock inside of your mouth. You whined as you pressed his cock deeper inside of your mouth, getting too excited and pressing his cock further into your mouth.

You barely thought about it as you pushed your mouth as far down his cock as you could, choking almost immediately. You gagged around his cock, pulling off and coughing to the side.

“You’re so big,” you said between coughs. Jeonghan scoffed.

“You’re just not trying hard enough.”

He slid his fingers into the strands of your hair and pushed your head back down on his cock.

“If it’s too much for you, just tap my thigh,” Jeonghan said, before beginning to push you down. He pushed you to the part where you first started coughing, but he didn’t stop there. He kept pushing, ignoring your gags as he eased you down on his cock.

Your fingers squeezed against his thighs, but you were halfway down his cock, and you wanted to be good so fucking badly. But despite that, Jeonghan pulled you off of his cock, letting you gasp for air.

“No, no,” you insisted. “I was okay. I’m okay, push me back down.”

Jeonghan’s eyebrow quirked.

“Really?” And the heightening of his voice made it clear just how surprised he was.

“Please.”

Jeonghan was quick to push you back down on his cock, this time going even faster than before. Despite your gags, he finally pushed you to the base of his cock. Your nose brushed against his pelvis, and tears ran down your cheeks, but after a few moments you felt your breathing through your nose began to even out, and your throat settled around his cock.

Jeonghan’s tight grip on your hair loosened, and his fingers threaded through your strands in a way that was almost comforting.

“You certainly are a determined slut,” Jeonghan praised. “Go ahead then, show me what your worth.”

You slowly raised yourself off of his cock, now finally able to really show Jeonghan what you were made of. You began to work his cock in and out of your mouth, hollowing it every now and then while one of your hands fiddled with his balls.

If you were insecure about your blowjob abilities, you weren’t with the way that Jeonghan was moaning at your actions. His fingers had settled down around the base of your neck, squeezing ever so slightly when a particularly loud moan left his mouth, a good girl sure to follow.

All it did was make you that much wetter. You were pretty sure that at his point you were literally dripping on his floor, but you didn’t care. As Jeonghan’s cock twitched in your mouth, you felt excitement course through you.

You could tell he was getting close.

You picked up your pace, sucking his cock with even more determination. You could taste the salty precum dribbling from the tip of his cock.

Jeonghan’s fingers suddenly tightened in your hair, and he yanked you up off of his cock. You coughed, trying to catch your breath.

“You’re such a disgusting whore, you want my cum that much?” Jeonghan asked. You whined, your fingers reaching forward trying to wrap back around his dick.

“Please, Jeonghan. I’ve been so good, I deserve it,” you pleaded. He scoffed.

“That’s for me to decide,” he said. “And I don’t think I want to put my cum anywhere then in this-” He gave your pussy a slap- not too hard. It was as if he was testing to see how you would react to it. It was just hard enough for you to yelp and jerk slightly. Jeonghan hummed. “Cunt.”

He pulled you up by the hair, pulling you close to him. He roughly slammed his lips to yours, his mouth sucking your bottom lip into his, his teeth nipping down on it just enough to puff it up.

“You want that? You want me to come in your pathetic cunt?” You were nodding enthusiastically at the question, but Jeonghan barely took note of it before pushing you face down into his bed. He grabbed you by your hips and pulled your ass up so that he could line the tip of his cock to your leaking cunt.

“God, you’re such a little whore. You’re going to make such a mess on my bed. You're dripping all over it.”

You whined, as Jeonghan pressed two of his fingers deep inside of you without any warning. You couldn’t help the way you laid your head to the side, your tits brushing aginst the comforter in a way that made you shiver.

“I wonder if you even really deserve my cock.”

You propped up onto your elbows, turning to look at Jeonghan with large eyes. You had never been with a man that had made you this desperate before in your life. Sure, you loved sex but there was something about Jeonghan that made you a complete different person. All that you could think about was his thick cock and having it pressed deep inside of you.

Just the suggestion of being filled with his cum made your mouth drool and you had never let a stranger fuck you without a condom. But with Jeonghan? It was all you wanted. You felt feral.

“Please Jeonghan I’ve been so good. I need your cock, I need it so bad. I don’t even have to cum I just need your cock in me. I need you to fill me with your cum,” you begged. Jeonghan reached forward, his cock still just brushing your soaking folds. His fingers wrapped around your throat, and he pulled you up by it, momentarily constricting your airways. You gasped desperately as Jeonghan pressed his face to yours.

“You’re so fucking pathetic. Begging a stranger to fill you with cum.”

He pushed you back down on the bed, pressing his hand on your back as to press your ass further in the air.

“But I pity a whore who has done this much and still needs a cock in her. So I’ll humor you.”

Without warning, Jeonghan pushed his cock inside of you, all the way down to the hilt. Your whole body jolted forward before you even realized what had happened and you cried out at the sudden intrusion. You unashamedly practically screamed at every thrust, your fingers digging into Jeonghan’s sheets as he fucked his cock into you.

He didn’t seem to care about the way that you were barely able to keep yourself up on the bed. All he cared about was digging his fingers into your hips to the point at which you knew there would be bruises there the next day.

“God, you’re so fucking loud. Do you know that? Do you really want everyone to know how pathetic you are.”

You didn’t even care how humiliating it was.

“Yes Jeonghan. Fuck your cock feels so fucking good,” you sobbed into his sheets. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Jeonghan snickered.

“I need to see how absolutely pathetic you look right now,” Jeonghan said. He pulled himself out of you and flipped you on the bed. You instantly spread your legs out for him, and he grabbed your thighs to pull you close to him, and without warning reinserted himself inside of you.

He pressed down on your belly fucking you fast and hard. You felt your eyes flutter closed as he fucked you, but it didn’t last long.

“Open your eyes you whore,” he snapped. You felt a slight pain on your cheek, your eyes shooting open as you realized that Jeonghan had lightly slapped you. You felt your walls tighten around Jeonghan’s cock, and a loud moan escaped your lips.

“Oh, you like that?” Jeonghan asked. He laughed and dragged you up and scooped the back of your neck up so that you were forced to look at him dead in the eyes. “You like it when I slap you like the fucking slut you are? You are depraved, you know that? Useless to anything other than being fucked.”

Jeonghan’s other hand lowered to your clit, and he pressed down on it hard.

“You’re going to cum aren’t you?” Jeonghan observed. You wondered what gave it away. The mascara surely running down your face as tears of pleasure left your eyes or the way you were desperately grinding your hips down on Jeonghan’s cock.

“You’re going to cum after being treated like absolutely useless trash.”

You were barely listening to him, lost in the sensation of his fingers on your clit and his cock slamming so deep into your pussy that every few seconds you had to practically scream a moan.

“Open your mouth whore.” You immediately opened it, sticking your tongue out. You watched as Jeonghan leaned forward, spitting into your open mouth. “Now fucking swallow.”

You swallowed obediently.

“Now thank me. Thank me for fucking spitting in your mouth like the whore you are.”

“Thank you,” you blurted out. “Thank you so much for fucking me even though I barely deserve it.”

“You’re self aware,” Jeonghan murmured. He spit again, this time on your cheek and smeared it over your face with another slap. “I’m going to cum, you hear me? And if you want to cum you will only do it after I do.”

You could barely keep yourself conscious, much less control the fact that your orgasm was rapidly approaching.

“And if you do cum before me, I’m going to fucking splatter my semen all over my face and you are going to go back down to that party and explain to everyone that you were bad and you didn’t deserve to have my cum in your cunt, do you hear me?”

You nodded, but it wasn’t enough for Jeonghan. He reached forward and slapped you again, this time harder.

“Thank you,” you cried out, the slap only making it harder not to cum. “I hear you, I understand. Please cum Jeonghan, please fill me up. I need to feel your cum inside me, I want it so much.”

You kept babbling, making Jeonghan roll his eyes.

“God you really are so pathetic.”

He pushed two of his fingers into your mouth, momentarily gagging you, but just as he did so you felt warm ropes of cum begin to fill your cunt. You cried around Jeonghan’s fingers, your body shaking as you tried to hold back your own orgasm.

You started to beg against Jeonghan’s fingers again, to the point where he had to remove them as he continued to fuck his cum deep inside of you.

“Please, can I cum now? I need to Jeonghan, I need to cum.”

Jeonghan hummed.

“You think you deserve to? You really think you get to cum on my cock?”

You nodded desperately but it wasn’t enough. All of a sudden Jeonghan pulled away from you. His cock slipping from your pussy. You felt tears rolling even faster down your face as you realized what he was taking away from you. You fell forward to your knees, grabbing at Jeonghan’s thighs as you practically crawled towards him.

“Thank you so much Jeonghan. Thank you for your cum, thank you, thank you,” you babbled incoherently. “But please, I want to cum. I want it so badly.”

“Yeah?” Jeonghan asked, honestly looking bored of you. He leaned down, grabbing you by the hair, ripping your head back roughly. “You think you can handle being choked baby? Think you can come just from my hands wrapped around your neck?”

“I... Please, I need more. Just a little more. Your thigh? Please, can I at least have your thigh?”

Jeonghan sighed, shaking his head.

“Pathetic, absolutely pathetic.”

But still he lifted you up so that you were sat on his thigh and his eyes wrapped around your throat.

“You can’t breath until you cum.”

His fingers tightened around your throat but it didn’t even matter, you found yourself silently screaming Jeonghan’s name as you rolled your hips down on Jeonghan’s thigh, feeling your walls spasm as Jeonghan’s cum leaked out of your swollen pussy.

Jeonghan’s hands loosened around your throat and your forehead fell forward on Jeonghan’s head. You were quick with your thank you’s yet again, fingers squeezing his thigh.

The orgasm was practically painful at the lack of Jeonghan’s cock in your pussy, but you were still thankful to have it at all. You tilted your head up, your nose brushing against Jeonghan’s. You looked up at him, lips curled up into a tired smile.

He hummed looking at you.

“You know what? You did deserve to cum,” he mumbled. He grabbed you by your hips, lowering you back down on his cock. He lifted you up, pressing you against as wall before beginning to rail you again. You were so sensitive but you didn’t even care. You wrapped your arms around Jeonghan’s shoulders, thanking him over and over again until he was cumming deep inside of you again.

“Now cum you pathetic slut. Cum all over my cock.”

You felt both Jeonghan’s cum and your own slick leaking out of your pussy around his cock as another orgasm ripped through you. As soon as you came down from your high, your face fell into Jeonghan’s chest.

“Fuck, Jeonghan, I’ve... I’ve never been fucked like that in my life.”

Jeonghan pulled you off of his cock, carrying you over to his bed, laying your head down on the pillow.

“Yeah? It wasn’t too much?” He asked you softly. You were surprised by the tone of his voice. You looked up at him, taking note of the gentle look on his face.

It was like he was a completely different person.

“Too much?” You asked with a laugh. “No, I loved every second of it.”

Your face flushed bright red.

“Will I ever admit to anyone the way I let you treat me and how much I liked it?” You asked. “Absolutely not, that goes to my grave but... I would let you do it again.”

Your eyes flickered away from Jeonghan’s but you heard the hum that left his mouth regardless.

“I’m going to draw a bath for you and get you something to drink okay?” Jeonghan said. You whined in protest.

“I don’t want to get up.”

“I don’t care, you need to get cleaned off.”

He looked away from you.

“Are you on birth control? Do you need me to buy you some plan B?”

You waved it off.

“I’m sure I’ll be okay.” You tried to lean up by propping yourself up on your elbows, but you were too weak.

“You can spend the night,” Jeonghan said. “I’ll be back for you in a second.”

You were silently for a second.

“Thank you.”

“It’s the bare minimum,” Jeonghan laughed. “I’ll be back.”

The door shut between him and as you rolled over you were lucky enough to find your phone with a message from Jeongyeon.

Hey, you’re not with Chan? Where’d you get off to?

Your face burned.

Ended up with someone else. Don’t wait up for me.

You let your head fall back down against the fluffy pillow. You certainly hoped that this would not be the last time that you saw Jeonghan.

“Jeonghan, did you really have to steal Chan’s date like that?” Jun sighed. Jeonghan looked up from his legos, eyebrows high.

“Steal? She came in my room. All I did was what she wanted me to do.”

“It was fine, she wasn’t feeling me,” Chan said dismissively. “Honestly not really my type either.”

“But exactly mine,” Jeonghan said, a smirk crossing his lips. “Jun, if you had told me sooner that Jeongyeon had such a dirty friend, I would have settled for one fuck buddy ages ago.”

Jun groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“And now I know too much about y/n.”

“Now?” Jihoon blurted. “You were lucky. You were downstairs at the party. I could hear every depraved thing Jeonghan said to that girl. And she thanked him for it.”

“As someone at the party,” Soonyoung piped up. “We could hear it too. Please tell me that she’s not a keeper.”

Jeonghan didn’t say anything. He just turned his attention back to his food, but everyone at the table could tell by the smile on his face, that there wouldn’t be much peace in the house the next time y/n was around.

Part Two: The Art of Humiliation

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nebulouscoffee · 10 months

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That scene between Tuvok and B'Elanna from 'Resistance' wrecks me actually... It's such a great moment for both characters (and actors, Tim Russ is SO underrated ugh) which highlights the differences between the two of them so well- yet, ultimately shows that under certain circumstances (in this case, torture) the distinctions between people... don't really matter. In an episode full of political violence, this moment is so significant, and I don't even really think I have the smarts to articulate why but I'll try lol.

TORRES: We told you already. We don't know anything about the Resistance. AUGRIS: I've heard that many times, from many people. Take him. (The forcefield is lowered, and Torres grabs the guard that steps through.) TUVOK: Lieutenant, stop! That will not help either of us. AUGRIS: He's right.

Everything about the way this scene (and the final shot where she's shoved back into her seat) is framed makes B'Elanna appear small, helpless- and embarrassed at her own helplessness- in that cell. We see her fidgeting, unable to sit down, constantly trying to break out or improvise her way out of the situation (she gets electrocuted earlier while trying to tamper with the circuitry)- it makes me wonder whether Tuvok was chosen to be tortured not because they believed he was more likely to have information, but because B'Elanna was more likely to be demoralised watching helplessly as he's dragged off. Augris's line implies that he's "broken" a great many people in the past; a tactic to instil fear and a helpless sense of inevitability in them both (torture doesn't work as a reliable way of extracting information; this is stated in dialogue in other Trek episodes such as 'Chain of Command' so the assertion here is at least not that- but what it does do is demoralise the public involved in resistances like this one.)

Later, B'Elanna is still trying to escape (do the guards know she's doing this? Are they just not intervening?) and she hears him screaming. Tuvok is someone who considers letting others witness him lose control over his exterior a huge (indecent, violating, humiliating) vulnerability, and the fact that he's the one being tortured is Not Insignificant in this context but like- it could've been the other way round. And B'Elanna knows that. It could've been her, and perhaps a small, scared part of her is relieved that it wasn't her, which is an awful way to feel (and if there's one thing B'Elanna hates, it's feeling like a coward). Also- the sheer violation of this, for B'Elanna to have witnessed him in this state, against her will- to later see him bloodied and weakened and flung in a cell, to have heard him screaming in pain- without his consent, knowing she can never un-witness it, knowing it wasn't her fault but still being put in such a situation where she has now played that role... Does this experience forcibly rewrite their respective conceptualisations of each other? Was Tuvok even thinking of her- somewhere outside, listening, worrying, blaming herself, fearing for herself, feeling ashamed, feeling so aware of him and her and the shared humiliation of this- when he was in there? Did seeing her upon coming back out change things? Could it ever change things? Did her presence, even as an outsider, whose memories of this event will always be (visually, at least) the constructs of her imagination- somehow make what happened in there real? Does her role as witness- and her memory thereby carrying some sort of legitimisation of what happened to him now, however warped and coloured by her own perspective and fears and embarrassment- make things better for Tuvok? Does it make things worse? Would he rather have endured this in secret? Would it have been better if she were a total stranger? Would it have been worse? And does any of this even matter when, for a moment, your life (your personhood, your goals, your presence) was completely reduced to what you "must endure"?

AUGRIS: We don't have to ask your friend any more questions, if you give us the answers. TORRES: I told you I don't. (Torres stops herself from hitting Augris, who leaves.) TORRES: I'm sorry. I guess I always assumed that Vulcans didn't feel pain like the rest of us. That you were able to block it out somehow. Until I heard. Was that you I heard?

And the way B'Elanna's voice breaks when she asks this, as if she was still somehow hoping the answer would be no... There are complexities to this which again I don't feel like I'm smart enough to articulate, but like- yes, B'Elanna would like to hear that it wasn't him because that would mean her friend wasn't tortured "that badly", he wasn't put through "enough pain" to scream that way, and it's easier and more comfortable to think of violence (and violation) as something you can rank on a scale, and the lower on it Tuvok's experience ranks, the better! the more easy it will be for them to "move past" this! - but also, there's this element of "I want the answer to be no because that would mean I would not have been a participant in your humiliation, just some stranger's whose voice I don't have a face to put to, which is much better than having to know what you (my friend, my colleague, my respected senior officer, someone I will have to see every day on the bridge, someone I know prefers to keep vulnerabilities hidden even deeper than anyone else I know) sound like when you scream. But also... it doesn't really matter, does it...? Whatever he says, there always was still a moment- however brief- where B'Elanna heard a man screaming in agony, and thought it could've been Tuvok. And in that moment, that possibility was created. Now, it will always exist. That moment will always have happened. It will always have done something to her. It will always exist between them; an ugly, uncomfortable bond.

And this is getting into even more things I'm not smart enough to articulate, but like- it's pretty significant to me that B'Elanna is one of the few characters who never actually tries to poke Tuvok into Doing An Emotion, even normally. She doesn't consider trying to get him to crack an entertaining pastime, unlike others (and I'm sure her experiences of feeling like an outsider- always- feeling Very Visible As Klingon, play a role in this- "all they ever saw was my forehead" does not lend itself so kindly to "let's see if we can get Mr. Vulcan to smile", "why, Tuvok, it seems you've been corrupted by Human (read: default) rituals after all!"- it's a light-hearted joke for many, sure, but what if Tuvok genuinely considers the idea of smiling in the presence of others reflective of a humiliating loss of control and deeply debasing?) I think it's pretty clear from canon that he's just being himself; he's not trying to be a killjoy or trying to be mean, he's just Vulcan. And this is one of the few moments in Trek I can think of when a Vulcan's perceived "control" over their emotions is not connected with their reluctance to laugh or cry or say something sentimental, but... this. B'Elanna is shocked, she's horrified, she demands an explanation as to how he can possibly go through something like this and not feel the desire to "fight back" in a way she understands- and the way she cannot grant him the pretence of not having witnessed, here, the way she can't just shove this in a box, pretend she never heard, because she's just so fundamentally honest- and Tuvok (who is also so fundamentally honest), in a painful moment of openness, tells her exactly what his reasoning is. He lets her see. He lets her hear; on his own terms. He wants for her to understand (for her to witness?) his (very Vulcan) distinction between resistance and endurance; his understanding of endurance as its own form of resistance. Idk it's such a quietly powerful and like- devastating- moment for me... So many people try, over and over, thoughout the show, to get Tuvok to break his Vulcansona- try to make him smile, make him say tender things, make him get irritated- just to see if they can do it. Just to see if he'll ever crack. I bet B'Elanna wishes she never had.

#sometimes I write essays NOT at 3am! haha #cw torture mention #I'm also thinking (of course) about that scene between g@rak and 0do in The Die Is Cast #which is slightly different (but only in terms of technicalities) as a case of Torturer As Witness #it's not just the physical discomfort that thingamabob puts 0do through that's torture ofc #it is very much g@rak's PRESENCE in that room #they didn't bring up the whole ''his eyes'' thing for nothing #it is very much about Being Seen (and being Watched and Witnessed and Observed)#in a moment so humiliating and (for lack of a better term) dehumanising #also it is heavily implied that g@rak volunteered to do this not only to prove to Tain (but mostly to himself) that he still could #but also out of a sort of protectiveness over 0do #there's this element of ''I'm doing this so someone worse than me doesn't do it instead because they will likely kill you'' denial/self-#justification? which ultimately makes the scene about g@rak (and his own moment of ''breaking'')#and not 0do (would 0do have preferred to ''break'' in front of a total stranger? we don't know! it's irrelevant! and that irrelevance is #possibly the most violent thing about that whole sequence phew)#something something Presence As Violence something wish I could word this more intelligently ugh #I keep thinking of stuff that happens (casually) in police stations around me all the time...#voy

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