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kouchan-scribbles · 2 years

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Renga oneshot

Heliophilia: love of the sun

Summary: renga snuggles, autistic Langa, they’re trying their best at communicating but its a process and Reki is bad at feelings yet again

Word count: 1566

Warnings: Joe jokes about sex but nothing actually happens -reminder they're minors- brief references to Adam assaulting Langa, Langa has an autistic meltdown/overstims (writer is autistic) I wrote these like 6 months apart with a fever so it may be incoherent at points.

“Remind me again why you’re on my counter using up the entire first aid kit again?” Joe sighs.

I wince as he pats my scraped knee, now carefully disinfected and wrapped with gauze. “You could spare me at least a little sympathy-“ I say as I fidget with the fresh bandaids on my fingers.

“Kid- how did you manage to get this hurt when you weren’t even at S? You guys should be in school right now anyways.“

“I got uh- distracted on the way home. Langa and I skipped our last 2 classes again, sorry…”

“Distracted? Do I wanna hear this or do you just want me to buy you kids some stuff?” He chuckles, crossing his arms and leaning back on the counter beside me.

I shudder in embarrassment “shaddap- I’m fine. Langas just….. LANGA-“ … I’m really not making the best case for myself here, huh?

“Ok ok, seriously though Reki, if you need anything just ask. You kids are stupid as hell and you’re young and bound to make dumb mistakes so I at least want you to be safe okay?”

“IT WASNT LIKE THAT DUDE! I just you know…. He doesn’t really do PDA and you know how he is- he never talks-“ I look up at Joe pitifully only to be startled by the eye contact and return my gaze to my hands.

“I want to be more like a real couple- like you and Cherry- I just- I know Adam like got all up in his face and was hella creepy and he told me he like- touched him and made him super uncomfortable-and the LAST thing I want to do is remind him of that or hurt or scare him…” curse my eyes for daring to tear up.

“Hey, I get how you feel. Kaoru’s pretty much the same, he’d throw Carla in the blender before he’d admit he’s having a human emotion.”

“That bad?”

“Oh yeah- trust me. Honestly you just need to talk stuff out with Langa about boundaries and communication. He’s the type that you need to ask directly if you want him to tell you something right? You need to talk to him like an adult okay?”

“Aaaarrghhhhh adultings so haaaarrdd” I slump off the counter to my feet. “do I have to” I say, pouting.

“Yes now shoo so I can prep for the dinner rush ya dork”Joe laughs ushering me out of the kitchen through the bar door.

I guess I’m going to Langa’s place then-

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

~Reki pressed his face into my shoulder as I smoothed my hands over his back, my own back resting on my bed. His sweater was worn and pilled, allowing me to occupy my hands with plucking each pill from the softened cloth as the sound of kitten-like breaths from him filled my ears. I was near a sleep-like state when I heard unintelligible mumbling from Reki, alerting me that he had stirred.

“Hey sunshine” I chuckled as he perked up to look at me head on, giving me the opportunity to lose myself in his crisp golden eyes, contrasting with the blue LEDs he'd helped me install in my room just a few weeks ago.

“Hey” Reki laughed earnestly as he rolled to lay on top of me fully. “Can I kiss you?” He chimed in again as I nodded, not missing a beat. “Like, KISS kiss you?” He’s so pretty when he gets flustered like this, his face is even redder than his hair. And I thought he couldn't get more lovely.

“Please?” I raise my neck to meet him halfway and wrap my arms around his shoulders and tuck my hands under his hood near the nape of his neck.

He's so warm-

This feels so nice, everything with Reki is amazing…

No, REKI is amazing.

He pulls himself closer to me as we kiss and I grow light headed. I'm always shocked that he tastes like raw sugarcane and honey, nearly too sweet but just enough to be intoxicating and addictive. I'm not quite sure where my hands have moved but his are heated enough to be felt through my shirt as he slides his palms up my chest.

“This is so perfect” I think to myself before he glides his fingers to the bottom hem of my shirt. My breath hitches and my lungs cease to function.

It's hot, not in the way everything was before, a bright warmth that filled my chest and melted my heart as if I'd become the happiest man alive instantaneously- no this was different, painful even. An excruciating heat that scalded my skin and burnt my flesh to ash. I couldn't move, speak, breath or even think, I just knew-

I don't like this anymore-

I could feel my heartbeat pounding in my head louder and louder drowning out any thoughts I could've had or sounds could've heard. My chest growing ever tenser and my arms shaking with my hands trapped in a tight fist, jagged chewed nails digging sharply into my palms as I repeatedly slam them to my chest and in the pillows below me trying to stop the suffocating sensations.

At some point Reki had gotten off of me and was frantically asking if I was okay. Everything he was saying was muffled, grainy and distant as if I were about to faint.

“Langa! Langa baby are you okay? Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry please just tell me what's wrong-”

It was hazy but I could recognize his worry and shakily put my hand in his and he stopped talking.

I don't want to be the reason he stopped his ramblings, I love his voice.

“Langa sweetie are you okay?” He spoke more slowly but the concern was clear and genuine.

I blinked as I slowly processed his words before nodding, reaching out after him when he retracted his hand, not knowing if I wanted to be touched.

“Do you want me to hold you? We don't have to stay here, I can leave or sit on the floor or something-” I cut him off by again grasping and squeezing his hand.

“St-stay please…. I- I don't like being alone, sorry-” I lean towards him, my gaze never leaving my own lap.

“Okay, whatever you want. Just say the word.” Rekis breath evened out knowing I was okay, I've never felt so loved in my life.

I tugged his hand under my chin so I could sniff his sweater, smelling like an over saturation of everything Reki, from him hardly doing laundry, to the slight saltiness of his sweat, to the “girls” deodorant he's so fond of using, smelling like berries and spice, nearly reminiscent of the christmas car scents my dad had used year round.

He had apparently started stroking my hair and delicately working out the small tangles that had formed. I must've fallen asleep after that because the next conscious thought was that the room was significantly more blue as the sunlight that was previously streaming through the curtains had vanished.

When I looked up I was again greeted with that beautiful golden brown. “Mornin sleepyhead” he giggled, my favorite sight.

“morning- “ I smiled as I nuzzled my cheek into his hand that was still resting under my chin.

“Baby I love you but my hands asleep, can I have that back now?” he continued laughing lightly.

I Grabbed his hand with both of mine “nope It's mine now” I huffed as he feigned defeat only to swing his other arm gently around me before going still.

“So uhh,” his mood shifted. “Do you want to talk about it? Like I totally get it if not but I just want to make sure I don't hurt you or make you uncomfortable or anything because I really love you and that's the last thing I-”

“Reki- It's okay. It's not your fault. I really love you too and I trust you more than anyone else it's not that, I just- It's a lot, You know? Like it's not that I don't want to like- do more physical stuff with you I just don't think I really can, it's just too much I guess, I don't really know.” I averted my eyes from his and pulled my hands away from him. “Sorry-”

“Please don't be sorry! I don't really understand but I want to make you happy. And it makes me really happy that you trust me so much and that you told me, I'd be crushed if I hurt you- That's really all I want from you Langa, honest. If even just normal kissing or anything makes makes you feel bad or scared, I don't mind waiting until you're ready even if that's in 20 years or even never, It's not why I love you and you deserve to be loved more than I can even offer!” Reki held out his hands for me to take.

“I-” my eyes watered ever so slightly at his words, “You're such a dork Reki” I smiled as I met his gorgeous eyes again before sliding back his headband and pecking his forehead. “I love you too”

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shylemon0 · 3 years

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Patrick Dating An Autistic!Reader Headcanons

This is definitely not even near how he would act at all but this is the version of him I have in my Mind Palace lol He’s still a prick tho

I just have to say I fucking hate him but I still love him lol (Owen Teague is the only reason I tolerate Patrick IN THE MOVIE NOT THE BOOK!)

This is going to be a lot longer than the other ones I’ve made, and as always most of this is based on how autism is for me (I know it’s different to everyone so I try to put some stuff that isn’t super specific?)

(The Reader is Gn)

———

· Before you guys started dating he’d probably make fun of you (not as harsh as he would towards other people cuz he got a crush on you)

· But when you finally got together he’d soften up a little bit

· When Patrick finds someone he likes that makes him feel happy he won’t let them go, so even though that’s kinda toxic it’s really the only way he’d have a somewhat healthy relationship (without him be hella abusive and cheating)

· He thinks the way you think is fascinating?

· He would try to be more of a decent person in general

· You stand up for him if people “bully's” him behind his back (you only do it because you know he’s trying really hard to be a better person)

· You’re the only other person he thinks is real

· He adores you

· He’d try to make you hang out with the Bowers gang, but of course Henry immediately calls you an slur which makes Patrick pissed

· But after a while you’d start hanging out with them a little bit so that you and Patrick can hang out more often (and you and Victor probably became somewhat friends)

· Patrick would beat up anyone who bully’s you

· He really protective

· If you’re having an meltdown he wouldn’t really know what to do at first, after your first meltdown in front of him he’d ask you what he could do next time it happens so he’ll know what to do

· You’re the only person he doesn’t like to see in distress or pain

· If you like hugging or cuddling he’d do it for you even tho at first he doesn’t like it at all

· The first time he kissed you, you happy stimmed without meaning to which made him smile (like genuinely, not his creepy smirk)

· A little pda

· He probably gives anyone who looks at you even a little weirdly a death glare

· He’s thinks it’s funny how unfazed you are when you guys watch horror movies

· You have an bad habit of apologizing every time you stim in front of him but he doesn’t like that you keep apologizing for something that helps you show him how you’re feeling

· He loves to listen to you talk about your interests because you’re so passionate when you do

· He tries to not be too touchy/handsy with you because he knows you don’t like being touched too much

· Patrick would still tease you a little but not in a way to hurt your feelings

· He probably has given you tons of his shirts that you think are comfy (he most likely did it so that people would know that you’re “his” without him being right next to you)

· His parents love you

· He thinks it cute when you don’t understand his and his friends jokes (the jokes a mostly sexual I’m guessing)

· He sneaks into your place almost every night just to say hi or to just hang out

· Lots of kissing

· You probably have to hide a lot of hickeys because this prick won’t stop giving you them

· If you have an hair playing stim he’ll let you play with his hair for hours

· You guys share fidget toys

· He loves it when you fall asleep in his arms

· He’ll only say “i love you” when you’re completely alone, or if you’re in public he’ll whisper it to you

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goth-giraffe · 4 years

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Not-so-quick guide to my OCs that I sometimes talk about here! xD So... Echo and Meredith, really. Plus a bonus one! Plus new art! :D

Warning, this is gonna be long so I put it under a cut :)

Anyway, because he’s the one that will definitely be mentioned most here, let’s start with..

Echo~

(I didn’t say anything about the quality of the new art xD)

Echo is my persona/self insert character..... he’s really just an alternate version of me (I like to think he’s my Alola form :3)

And like me he’s lonely so he has imaginary friends to keep him going, his current one being Loki ‘cause my current obsession is Loki

Echo is kinda hard to explain because everything about him fluctuates depending on my mood.. there are different versions of him and he doesn’t exactly have a set story or universe.. (For instance I didn’t create him specifically to hang out with Loki, but when I needed a friend I gave him Loki as an imaginary one)

Anyway! Some basic facts! He’s ace/aro, and agenderfluid (questioning?), with he/him pronouns (they/them is safe too though)

Kinda short, 5′2″ ish

Around my age, 17-20, but the mental age of anywhere from 8-17 ish.... he’s always kind of childish but how extreme varies from moment to moment

He’s AFAB but I usually draw him flat-chested because I use him as a way to combat dysphoria so, should anyone else want to draw him, best to draw him flat-chested

Loves trying on clothes! (Mainly because I like a lot of clothes but pretty much exclusively wear pajamas so... yeah I use my OCs as models)

Quiet, non-verbal in some versions (in which case he’ll write in a notepad to communicate), very shy

Sometimes makes clicking noises to calm himself

Daydreams a lot, also sleeps a lot

Gets upset over dumb things... and he’s scared of everything

Doesn’t really like being touched but sometimes snuggles Loki when he’s upset

He’s probably autistic

Probably also has borderline personality disorder.. but I’m unsure about giving him the disorders I think I have, because I don’t actually have a diagnosis (scared of doctors).. nonetheless, a lot of the symptoms that come with those disorders, he has

Likes to draw and his muse is Loki

Likes bugs, especially butterflies

Collects rocks

Eats goldfish crackers

Has really bad posture

Okay at this point I’m just adding random facts about me which is probably weird idk xD I don’t know what more to say about him soo yeah... this is my weird persona

aand next up-

Meredith~

(I liked how this art turned out tbh and I might repost it on my other blog..)

Meredith is an OC insert specifically for Marvel Cinematic Universe

She’s dating Loki, and you’ll find a lot more about her and Loki at @cuddly-loki! (It’s my blog specifically for them! :D)

Buuuut I do mention her here occasionally because I love her (and there are definitely traces of her from when this blog was cuddly-loki), so I’m including her in this :3

She’s not really into labels but she is kinda gendermeh, I think of her as a nonbinary woman (...or soft butch, but I call her that mostly when Loki happens to swap genders), but she just uses she/her pronouns

Again, meh about labels but she has dated both feminine and masculine people, and she doesn’t really experience physical attraction the same as most people

Kinda goth, dresses mostly in greyscale colours and in kind of goth/punk clothes I guess (also, she prefers androgynous clothes)

Really affectionate with people close to her, close friends and her boyfriend of course :3 (mild PDA does not make her uncomfortable but it sure does irritate Loki)

Quiet, but not shy- she’ll talk to anyone probably but she’d rather watch them until it makes them uncomfortable xD

Once you get past the being weird or goth to creep you out though, she’s very soft and pretty nice (even if still a little dark)

She’s an aspiring musician.. sorta. She plays violin and loves music.. but also has a weird relationship with music, we’ll just leave it at that for now

Works night shift as a bartender

Likes horror movies

Favourite food is pizza

Loves birds

Doesn’t like technology very much

She has a lineup of mental disorders too I’m sure, she’s an ex junkie for one and likes to feel numb to things..

Also has persistent insomnia, either related to her depression or depression meds, who knows

Lives in her apartment with a couple plants and Loki, who is still adjusting to Earth life

Like mentioned above you can find more of Meredith at my blog @cuddly-loki and if you ask questions about her or her and Loki I will probably be very happy :)

Side note: Meredith is not meant to be a self insert but we do have things in common, and I’d probably get along with her. She’s pretty chill and gets along with most people though haha

A little bonus one, I don’t know if I’ve mentioned her here before but just in case

Gwyneth~

(Okay this turned out a little messy but ehh. It was kind of just from memory, I might have still had references for her but I lost them when my jumpdrive quit so meh)

She’s a dead character that I don’t use anymore and won’t be using anymore but on the off chance I’ve mentioned her or do mention her, I’ll go ahead and add her to this as a little bonus

I created her when I first started obsessing over Loki, and she was a self insert I used to selfship romantically with him... it was okay for a brief time but in the end I hated it. It’s hard to explain, kind of personal.. but for one thing, I’m pretty sure I’m aromantic. I love soft romance stuff but I don’t really want to be part of it.

...And that’s why I killed Gwyneth and created Meredith ehehe

I’m gonna talk about her a little anyway, for one, she was an artist/painter

She liked to take pictures of strangers to paint them and I’m pretty sure that’s how she met Loki (AKA the weirdo on the sidewalk in the all black suit)

I honestly don’t remember what her actual income came from, maybe she was on disability, Idk

Anyway she was a mess. Severely depressed. Couldn’t really keep herself together.

She hid behind jokes and sarcasm though, so no one really knew how bad she was (even Loki, for a time)

She would climb trees which annoyed Loki a little bit, turns out trickster gods don’t enjoy having to climb trees just to talk to their girlfriends

Wore a trench coat as kind of a comfort item (because that’s what I did at that time)

Often got lost in daydreams...

Scared of most things...

Yeah you’ll notice she’s a lot like Echo (even the hair- pbbt). I’ve had a lot of self inserts over the years, killed off when my anxiety convinced me I was being cringey or when they didn’t feel like me anymore.. with Gwyneth it was maybe a tiny bit those things but also other stuff, like being aromantic questioning. Creating Echo was a new start for me because it was more of an exploration of where I’m comfy gender-wise... and, unlike most of my other self inserts, I don’t really age him up. But most importantly... he’s very emotionally messy but he doesn’t hide it (or else he doesn’t hide it well) because one of my things is I need to at least pretend that people would still love me if they knew how sad and broken I am. So.. yes, Echo is a sensitive character, he upsets easily and he’s usually pretty sad.. but that’s kind of the point, because he’s still loved.

.....Anyway sorry for going back to Echo. I don’t have a lot more to say about Gwyneth - she’s dead and not coming back - but she was a stepping stone to where I’m currently comfortable so, RIP Gwyneth I suppose :)

On the page I drew them on it’s kinda funny because it looks like Meredith and Echo are very uncomfortable that Gwyneth is there (which was only semi-intentional ehehe)

Echo looks cautiously curious but Meredith looks very awkward like “Oh.. so you’re back...” ..she’s hiding something... And Gwyneth’s like “So... how’s Loki been?” xD

All these characters are obviously kinda similar which is part of why I put them all here (....clearly I have an obsession with blue hair but shhh), also their connections to Loki, haha.... Meredith is definitely the most connected, Echo’s Loki isn’t real and Gwyneth is dead, so... yeah.

Anyway hopefully this was a little helpful. I might make better guides for Meredith and Echo sometime but for now this works. Also, always feel free to ask questions about them!! :)

#I had to keep adding stuff for echo to make up for the fact that I CANNOT stop myself from rambling about meredith xD #oh you wanna hear about echo? LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MEREDITH #pffft #but seeing as how echo will be on this blog a lot more I tried to give him the longest description thing #also I think I'll make a proper profile/reference thing for meredith sometime so I'm not gonna worry about putting this on cuddly-loki #...maybe the meredith drawing though :3 #giraffe rambles #long post #my ocs #echo #meredith #gwyneth

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