how are you
not gonna lie, I'm having the time of my life right now :) shit's been crazy and I'm learning to enjoy things the way they are while still adding my own flair.
I know you're probably wondering about the future of this blog and if specific posts will have their 2nd or 3rd part, but it's truly TRULY up in the air. I've been busy with my own endeavors, and so has Admin 2.
I am no longer as heavily invested in kpop and its glamour, nor do I take the time to witness my faves' personal growth on Youtube or through social media anymore.
It was a realization that hit me one day, I had my post notifications on for all of my biases (and other celebrities) and I was getting so bothered with my phone vibrating constantly throughout the day. I was asking myself "do I really care or is kpop culture telling me I should care?"
And I will not be taking any slander in how much of a chokehold I was in, this ain't the first time ya'll are going to hear about a K-pop stan finally admitting it was a phase and that yes, we were influenced and pressured into K-pop stan culture as YOUNG AND IMPRESSIONABLE TEENAGERS but that's not the conversation I'm bringing up (and some of yall choose to continue to participate, I'm talking bout the ones who realize this shit is not "fun and playful" anymore the more your mind matures and the deeper you are into Kpop and the culture).
And as a heavily invested BTS ARMY, CHESIRE (rip), NCTZEN, ONCE, REVELUV, BLINK, and many more, I just couldn't keep spending so much time on figures that are literally not adding anything substantial to my current life. K-pop evolved into a form of escapism for me and I was ready to live in the moment.
I got into the world of Korean culture and pop at one of the lowest moments in my life that I can consciously remember and recall. So of course I made this genre, this culture, part of my core happiness during a period of personal devastation.
Post notifications from my faves would come as often as bad news and unfavorable moments. Without even knowing, I waited for the good news from K-pop to put the bandaid over the mental pain I endured from my day-to-day. I eventually became more hopeful and positive BECAUSE I looked forward to something so simple and insignificant as a "Thank you JAKARTA 💜💜💜💜💜💜" I'm not even from that place and I was just as elated (and jealous ofc) for the fans that got to see them.
In the same way Rap/Hip-Hop can be a way of life as well as change your outlook on life, and Metal/Rock can be a way of life, K-pop can also be a way of life and change your outlook on life.
But when I realized I don't need a bandaid or balm anymore, K-pop stopped becoming a focal point. It's my guilty pleasure on Youtube when I'm h*gh and my 500 hr K-pop playlist is now used for the rainy days I rarely have.
The moment was like, "Oh, it's just Haechan that posted," when it used to be "OMG HAECHAN POSTED AISUHDUISGIUE." I used to see one K-pop-related thing, and happily jump into a wormhole of Youtube videos, stan Twitter posts, and heated discussions on album theories.
My love for K-pop turned into appreciation for the good music I liked, not strict devotion to the artist. Because that's the reality of almost all art forms. See it for how it is and it's just like everything else; just attach meaning to it and now it's something special.
I'm just a fan of K-pop nowadays lol. I used to be so annoyed at know-it-all 2nd gen stans as a new K-pop stan, but look at me now. A know-it-all 3rd gen fan who looks at 4th gen with distaste lmao. But it is what it is. And 4th gen is a little... anyways...
BUT NOW I KNOW HOW 2ND GENERATION FANS FELT WHEN 3RD GEN CAME AROUND. And it's just because I grew out of it, K-pop will always be tailored to younger audiences and I'm well past that.
I sometimes listen to the Kpop ON playlist on Spotify, without bias (pun is definitely intended), and occasionally see that stan Twitter is the exact way I left it (they say the game doesn't change, just the players). I still get a little excited to see which new groups are about to debut, groups that i miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight wanna do some light research on just to remember what it felt like to be introduced to the new personality.
Nowadays, my thought's on what I hear or see are like this:
"Are there any new survival shows? I probably won't watch it, but what are yall saying about it now"
"..."
"FUCK I FORGOT JIN'S GOING TO THE MILITARY"
"...Why is (random group) still dropping music..."
"NOT YOU TOO HOBI"
"I wonder if Joy is still with Crush"
"I wonder when Jennie is gonna go solo"
And I don't indulge in these thoughts too much because it isn't as imperative to me as they used to be. I treat those thoughts just like any other thought that doesn't require my immediate attention. I'll always love my k-pop phase, but I'll never forget my roots! 2018 me would probably cuss me the fuck out if she found out I still haven't listened to Jimin's new song or listened to NCT 127's latest repackage (please tell me I didn't miss another release).
In conclusion, I began treating K-pop like any other genre;
I'm gonna keep talking my shit.
If there's good music, I'll listen and might playlist it.
If there's not, I'll keep it pushing.
Any interesting news? Lemme see what it's about.
I am not invested enough to create fanfic anymore.
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