I've been having Thoughts about Cloud Strife in a dress all day and this is my silly self-indulgent corner of the internet, so here we go! a silly scenario.
takes place between Kalm and the Temple of the Ancients. for some reason (post Cait Sith, Cid, and Vincent joining) - probably to gain info - the party has to infiltrate a party in some filthy rich mansion. Cloud needs to go inside to make sure the info is helpful, but he's wanted. he can't just show up.
and he specifically needs to go inside... the party is brainstorming when Tifa and Aerith lock eyes. Cloud groans. he knows exactly what they're thinking, but c'mon Cloud! isn't this the best way to sneak in?
Cloud is adamantly against it, but he can't openly protest it, because that would be suspicious and then they'd know. so Cloud finally huffs and agrees to it. the girls giggle and lock arms with him, looking at the others.
Aerith: hmm... he'll need someone to go in.
Tifa: it can't be us since we're wanted... can't be Barret either...
Aerith: and can't be Cait Sith either - sorry!
Tifa: that just leaves Vincent and Cid...
Cloud: ...do I get a say in this
Aerith: hush. which one of you would be better at a party?
Cid points to himself and Vincent looks off to the side. Aerith would clap her hands in delight and Tifa points to Barret.
Tifa: please get him in a suit! we'll be back in an hour?
Barret: a suit? Tifa, what are you- Tifa!
the girls giggle and drag Cloud off.
they're in the middle of the mart, and they break it up into three sections: hair, make-up, a dress. the hair and make-up is easy, but the dress? do they even have the gil for that?
so, regrettably, they can't get Cloud into an elaborate dress. it's probably for the best, anyway, because his goal is to fit in. after lots of dragging him around, lots of him protesting and whining, they finally have completed the look: a black form-fitting dress reaching down to his ankles; sheer black gloves reaching up to his forearm; black pumps; light lip-gloss; mascara; and an extension braid wrapped around the back of his head. so safe to say, Cloud is a fucking vision.
Aerith: wait, wait! we can't go yet! we need to come up with a name for him
Cloud, speaking in near mumbles, brain still reeling: why? girls are named Cloud...
Tifa: Aerith's got a point, Cloud. if someone finds you familiar, hearing your name could get you in trouble. we'll have to come up with something-
Aerith: Blue.
Tifa, Cloud: blue?
Aerith: yes, I've thought of this a lot! his eyes! or, well, her eyes. her mother saw those baby blues and just knew she had to name her Blue.
Cloud: Blue Strife?
Aerith: no, silly! you're not keeping your last name either.
Cloud: it feels like you're shipping me off for marriage...
Tifa: hmm... how about... Woolf?
Cloud: ...wolf.
Aerith: oh! I love it! because he's such a lone wolf, right?
the girls giggle while Cloud crosses his arms, looking absolutely stunning and absolutely annoyed.
Cloud: you want my name to be Blue Woolf.
Tifa: c'mon, Ms. Woolf, let's go see if your date is ready!
Cloud: kill me...
they drag him to where the rest of the party is. they managed to find Cid some really cheap suit, it's just well-put enough that no one would give Cid a second glance, especially not with his charming attitude.
Tifa: we're back!
Cait Sith: we were about to get worried! er, where did Cloud wonder off to?
Aerith, biting back a smile: he's right here!
Tifa and Aerith step aside to do a dramatic reveal of Cloud. he's not posing and refuses to look up at the shocked expressions of his friends. burning, he stomps forward, grabs Cid's wrist with as much rage as he can manage, and begins to yank him towards the party.
Barret: so that's how he helped Tifa out...
Aerith: bye Cid! bye Ms. Blue Woolf!
Cid: blue? wolf?
Cloud keeps mumbling under his breath for someone to kill him.
and of course, Cloud gets hit on a lot at the party <3
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