#and everyone treats it as just like. a normal thing that happened

[gwennybriggs]

Abracadabra:

Link if you want it:

Or! You can read it here :)

Word count: 1,475

Inspired by a line from a Chappell Roan song that’s been stuck in my head for weeks.

It’s a little spicy, but not too spicy! I’m not super comfortable writing smut, but decided to try it out again since it’s been a few years. Enjoy, cuties!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The birds were chirping and the sun was shining bright when you woke up that morning; you knew it was going to be a wonderful day. You rolled out of bed, pulled on your skirt and blouse, and waltzed out the door to make a stop at the coffee shop down the street. It had become your normal Friday routine to stop and grab a hot chocolate for yourself, and a coffee for your favorite coworker, Melissa Schemmenti. In turn, Melissa would bring a danish for you and a muffin for herself. You weren’t exactly sure when or how it happened, but you looked forward to it every week.

It had been a bit of a stressful week with state testing and the kids were over it just as much as the teachers were. Janine convinced Ava to allow her to set up a talent show as a ‘carrot’ for the end of testing week.

“Carrot? What the hell you mean, carrot? Ain’t nobody lookin’ for a vegetable, girl.”

Janine rubbed her temples, “You know, like when you put a carrot in front of a horse to keep them moving. It’s a little motivation to get people through the week.”

“Whatever. You can have a talent show, just make sure Melissa stays off the stage with her horrific impressions. I simply cannot listen to her butcher The Godfather again.”

You prepared all week to share your magic tricks with the school. Jacob caught wind and asked if you would like to join him in his magic act, claiming that your combined expertise would win you more applause. You reluctantly agreed and spent all of Thursday evening with him at Melissa’s house practicing. It wouldn’t have been so bad if the redhead had been there, but she spent the evening with Barbara instead.

You could smell Melissa’s perfume before you even stepped foot in the lounge and it made you smile. During your first year at Abbott you developed the tiniest crush on her, but at this point, you were flat out in love with the woman. You didn’t exactly hide the fact that you liked her that way, but you never said it out loud either. Melissa had told you she was bisexual but leaned more towards men fairly early on in your friendship when you told her you were a lesbian. After sharing a bottle of wine together you asked her what her type was.

“Big burly men with beards who can take care of me or pretty little ladies who with let me take care of them. What about you? So I know what to look out for for ya,” she responded with a chuckle.

You fought yourself not to reply with a simple ‘you’ and gave her a vague description of herself instead. She raised an eyebrow but didn’t push. The two of you shared some casual flirting over time, but you just chalked it up to her treating you like a close friend.

The lounge was already buzzing when you walked in, everyone talking about what their students were doing for their acts or which teachers signed up. You crossed the room to set your things down before walking over to Melissa to exchange goods. She beamed up at you when you placed your hand on her shoulder and her cup on the table in front of her.

“I’ve been looking forward to this all week, thanks doll face,” she sipped her coffee and handed you a raspberry danish.

“Likewise! Thanks, pumpkin.” You winked at her and took your seat across the room with Janine, Gregory and Jacob, completely missing Melissa’s coy smile in response to the nickname.

The bell rang and everyone gathered their belongings to start the day. You and Melissa were the last ones in the room as you moved things in the fridge to fit your lunch. She came up behind you, resting her hand on your hip for balance as she leaned into the fridge with you to move her containers. You froze at the contact and mentally begged yourself not to blush. As she leaned further down, her hand slid over to your ass. Your eyes were glued to her cleavage, beautifully illuminated by the refrigerator light. You quickly turned your head when she caught you staring.

She stood up, her hand still slightly splayed your ass. Your face was beet red. “No need to steal glances hon, all you gotta do is ask,” she clicked her tongue and made her way out the door, swaying her hips dramatically. She knew you were watching.

More than a little flustered, you splashed cold water on your face and left to tend to your students. The hours ticked by and you struggled to focus on anything other than the feeling of Melissa’s hand on your backside. You were looking forward to spending lunch with her and Barbara, but Jacob insisted you practice with him one more time before the talent show. Between bites of pasta you made coins disappear and reappear from behind Jacob’s ear and cheered him on as he mastered revealing the chosen card.

The entire school gathered to watch the staff and students perform at the end of the day. You took a seat next to Melissa, waiting for your turn.

“You got any hidden talents you’re gonna share with us, red?” You poked at her side.

“Nah, can’t share my talents here kid. I wouldn’t be allowed back on school grounds,” she smirked. “Just joshin’, Ava forbade me from doing impressions so I’m stuck in the crowd. I’m excited to see what youse cooked up for your act though, Jacob hasn’t shut up about it.”

“Ha, I’m sure he hasn’t.”

Janine introduced your act and you followed Jacob onto the stage. The two of you played off of each other’s tricks with the crowd ooh-ing and aww-ing. You had always enjoyed tricking people with sleight of hand, but you enjoyed it even more when you were able to fool an entire auditorium. When the four minutes of fame were over you returned to your seat next to Melissa. She nodded her approval and continued to watch the show.

A few minutes later you excused yourself to use to restroom. The bathroom was empty and you did your business quickly. As you opened your stall door you jumped at the sight of Melissa sitting on the counter. You hadn’t even heard her come in.

“Oh Jesus!”

“It’s actually Melissa, but I get that one a lot.” She slid off the counter to stand next to you as you washed your hands.

“Very funny,” you rolled your eyes.

She moved closer, her breasts brushing your arm. “Yeah, but you like it when I’m cheesy like that.”

Your breathing hitched. “I d-do,” you stuttered and melting at the close proximity.

“So, tell me what else you like, gorgeous.” She was nearly straddling your right leg. Her eyes filled with fire as she brought her hand up to your cheek and traced a finger along your jaw line.

You stifled a whimper and bit your lip, unable to speak without making a fool of yourself. She moved even closer, now actually straddling your leg, you could feel the warmth of her. You placed your hands on the counter to keep yourself upright.

“I know you like magic.” She nuzzled her face into your hair and lowered her voice to a whisper, “I’ve got a wand and a rabbit.” She punctuated her sentence with a light nibble to your earlobe. You gasped; a cold chill ran up your spine and you couldn’t hide the shiver. Her hand on your left hip pulled you in between her legs so that her core was pressed firmly against your thigh.

You squeezed your eyes shut, you wanted her to ruin you right then and there, but the school day wasn’t over and the talent show was about to let out.

“Mel, I want this,” you whined and guided her free hand down to your soaked panties, wanting her to feel exactly how bad you wanted, needed, her. “But we can’t do that here, not now at least. Like you said, we wouldn’t be allowed back on a school grounds.”

She lifted your skirt so you could feel her own wetness through her leggings against your bare skin. “My house, eight o’clock.” Melissa kissed you with such fervor that it made you want to go back on your words. “Bring whatever other magic tricks you have up your sleeve, or in your nightstand drawer,” she winked and playfully smacked your ass as she walked away.

You tried desperately to gather your thoughts and some semblance of composure, your mind racing with the image of Melissa playing with her toys- and you. The redhead was going to be the death of you yet.

#abbott elementary #melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti x reader #jacob hill #ava coleman #janine teagues #magic tricks #red wine supernova

[shutupineedtothink]

Ok so my friend and I just recorded 4 HOURS of raw audio breaking down the OUAT pilot, season 1 finale, and discussing the show in general for our new podcast where we make each other watch episodes of our favorite shows and talk about them together. It’s exactly as fun as you would imagine. :)

But even after all that, I still have things I forgot to say or didn’t get to. So here’s a few of them:

1. “Evil” as addiction: the OUAT writers treat the concept of being evil like addiction/substance abuse which is really interesting and kind of a bold choice for a 2011 show about fairytales. Then within that structure they show basically the two choices you have when facing addiction: choose not to use and become a better, healed version of yourself (Regina) or keep using and stay stuck in your patterns and hurt everyone you love forever (Rumple). As a child of an alcoholic who has chosen the latter, I loved watching Regina’s journey in this context and while she stumbles a lot, she keeps striving to be good even though she gets the short end of the stick most of the time. And her North Star is always Henry, which I think is important to show that you don’t just change because you feel like it, there usually has to be the threat of something worse happening if you don’t change (in this case, losing Henry physically and emotionally).

2. Regina Mills might be the most psychologically complex and interesting character on prime time tv in the 2010s? Period??

3. I rambled a good bit in the podcast about the costumes and color symbolism but here’s a bit more for you: Once Regina is on team heroes she often wears some kind of red top (the hero’s color) with a black jacket/coat over it showing that she’s changed on the inside but she still *looks* like the evil queen on the outside and can now use that persona/power to her advantage instead of being consumed by it. By the end of S5 this contrasts with Emma who wears her signature red jacket but a black/white/gray sweater underneath, showing that she’s a little more of a mix of good and evil these days post-dark one. In a color sense, they’re almost mirror images of each other at this point, and it’s really cool.

4. I know a lot of people are really salty about how Emma’s light kind of dims toward S4, 5, 6, and I’m right there with you. Her character feels flatter, and honestly kind of depressed. Now idk if this was a real choice on the writers’/JMo’s part, if she was going through some stuff at this time and it just showed up in the character, or what. That said, it does track for me in a way, especially post-dark one. She should be kind of thrown off by everything that’s happened! She should be changed! I just wish they had done something with it instead of pretending it was normal. If Regina’s struggle with evil is analogous to addiction, why can’t Emma’s struggle with evil be analogous to depression? It would have been an interesting take. Somebody write the fic.

I could keep going but I’ll stop here for now. Stay tuned for the podcast!

#OUAT #Regina mills #Emma swan #swan queen #Henry mills #once upon a time #analysis

[apas-75]

So last night I finished reading Rise of the Red Blade for TotE Vibes Research purposes and the two Inquisitor characters in it really illustrate exactly why I think Barriss is going to survive and escape them.

Because the thing is that there are two kinds of Inquisitors! The ones who volunteered, and the ones who...didn’t. Iskat (RotRB’s focus character) perfectly exemplifies the first type: she had some traumatizing experiences at a young age, fell through a number of institutional cracks in the Order, had a really terrible master (meet me in the pit, Sember Vey), everyone was too busy to give her the follow-up they would under normal circumstances, Palpatine had an agent actively gathering information about her and pushing her to become Worse—she was a pre-selected candidate who was offered the choice to come quietly when Order 66 hit, and she took it. By that point all of her issues and doubts had been exacerbated to the point where it wasn’t hard for her to make herself hate the Jedi, and then she rationalized her way through any indication that her freedom was a lie and doubled her way down right into hell.

By contrast: Tualon, Iskat’s crechemate situationship guy. He had some issues but was not someone on Palpatine’s radar; Iskat left him to die in Order 66 and he survived getting shot by darksiding out about her betrayal. Because of that he was taken alive and they did some shit to him. When Iskat runs into him at the Inquisitor HQ after he’s freshly-inducted he can barely remember why he hates her, or anything else from before he was taken. He woke up in the room where you fight Trilla and they fully shattered him and glued a semblance of a person back together out of the wreckage, just COMPLETELY Winter Soldiered the guy, and the only way he had to cope with it is to lean into a weird codependent situationship with Iskat.

And that distinction’s always been there with the Inquisitors; you have the true believers who ended up hating the Jedi or wanted to go on a power trip (or had the kind of revenge plan only a 12 year old could come up with and then stick to for a decade, in one case) and didn’t need any additional coercion to volunteer, and you have the ones that they broke. In the former group you’ve got the Grand Inquisitor, Reva/Third, Lyn/Fourth*, Fifth, and Iskat/Thirteenth. For the most part they’re certified freaks, but they came by it naturally. (Reva’s a different flavor.) In the latter, you’ve got Trilla/Second, Seventh, Masana/Ninth, Tualon, and probably most of the others. They all got disassembled and reassembled without much care given to the process and are all Coping with it badly in different ways, whether by deciding it’s Empowering, Actually (Trilla & Seventh) or by becoming completely jaded about everything (Masana & Tualon).

(*We obviously don’t know a lot about Fourth yet, but the fact that she shows up to recruit Barriss while rocking yellow dark side eyes before ROTS is even over tells me she’s definitely a volunteer.)

All this is to say: The Grand Inquisitor is making a colossal mistake with Barriss from the drop, and it’s why I think she’s going to win their battle of wits and escape. Because he is treating her like she is an Iskat and she could not be any farther from it.

He sends Lyn to get her to come quietly! They actively withhold information from her about what happened to the Jedi and what her expected role in it is! That’s not how they recruit the ones they think will be a problem; if that were the case she would have been stunned out of hand and woken up on a rack.

Instead, he’s giving her special attention,, he’s training her—he doesn’t think they need to break her. She’s just got a few...pesky hang-ups from her time as a Jedi that need ironing out**. He’s projecting on her; he doesn’t just want an empty shell holding a lightsaber—he wants Barriss Offee, loyally kneeling at his side, fully believing in their mission. She’s his favorite.

(**That “mercy only breeds defeat” line isn’t just a generic darksidism; I’m pretty sure he’s directly critiquing how Barriss got caught because she showed mercy to Asajj Ventress.)

And surely that's something he can turn her into, right? Because she hates the Jedi, right? She attacked them, she outsmarted them, obviously she’d be down for wanting to wipe them out! He was there when she confessed and, like pretty much everyone else in the room save for Ahsoka, he didn’t hear a single word that she said—just what he wanted her to be saying. He’s got a deeply incorrect idea of her, and that idea is “she’s just like me for real.”

And he’s wrong, because the Inquisitorius is everything she feared the Jedi Order was becoming—literally, an army fighting for the dark side—and the Empire is everything she knew the Republic was becoming. She might be prone to despairing, it might in some hypothetical be possible to get her into the same resigned despair trap as Anakin, but she would never actually want to serve the Empire, and they don't think they'll have to try hard to convince her to.

She loves the Jedi, she loved being a Jedi, she wanted to save them. She wants to be one again more than anything even though right now she thinks she doesn’t deserve it, thinks that she’s already too broken to reclaim what she was. But I think being surrounded by actual fallen Jedi and being told over and over again that she’s like them is, in the end, going to be what reminds her that she never stopped being a Jedi in the first place.

And as long as she can make sure her captors don't realize that's true until it's too late, she'll be home free.

#barriss offee #grand inquisitor #inquisitorius #tales of the empire #tote #star wars #they're gonna make her use the dark side and they're gonna make her do some stuff it'll be hard for her to live with #and she might give up hope for a minute #but I believe in her #she's gonna make it #the only way out is through

[on-wednesdays-we-eat-the-rich]

So I'm having thoughts about LOTR. Specifically the ending. And the fanfiction that rewrites the ending. Bear with me.

So we all know that LOTR ends with Frodo leaving Middle Earth and going to the Undying Lands, right. And we all know that he does this because all the events of the story have had such an impact on him that they've left him quite traumatised and not really able to live life the way he used to. And we can probably all guess that this is a reflection of how Tolkien may have thought about his trauma after fighting in the First World War.

The ending makes sense considering the time the book was written, because in the 1940's and 50's, people didn't know as much about mental health and disability as they do now, and there weren't as many ways to help people manage disabilities other than institutionalising them or like. Giving them cocaine or something idk. So it's reasonable to assume that because Tolkien didn't see many ways that people could live with disabilities and be happy, he couldn't write them into LOTR and instead basically just put Frodo in Middle Earth's equivalent of Heaven and said "there you go, you're all better now".

I like this as a sort of tragic ending. I mean, you can't deny that someone being so drastically changed by an experience means they can't enjoy the things they grew up with is pretty tragic. The ending does make sense. But I kind of hate it.

I don't think it was written badly or anything, and I'm not trying to dismiss Tolkien's experiences that influenced this ending. My issue with it is that, when you look at it through a modern lens, it has vaguely ableist connotations. Specifically the idea that disabled people (Frodo) can't live full lives and be happy in the real world (Middle Earth) and can therefore only be happy when they're "cured" or when they die and go to Heaven (the Undying Lands).

Now obviously LOTR is an old book and it's important to consider the time it was created when analysing it, as you would do with any other piece of classic literature. A lot of old books have some outdated language and concepts in them, simply because that was normal back then. And until very recently, we probably wouldn't have thought the ending of LOTR was in any way problematic. And it might not have been, because it's not really the fact that Tolkien wrote that ending that's an issue; it's the fact that the way the world worked back then made it near impossible to even think about any other ending.

Since the book was written, though, there have been a lot of advancements in science and research into disabilities, and there are now much more effective ways to treat and manage them. There's medication and therapy for physical and mental issues, and there are lots of accommodations that we can and should put in place to make life easier for everyone. Back in the 1940's, Tolkien wouldn't have had these things, and therefore didn't consider them to be options when writing about what happens to Frodo at the end of the story. But now, we do have them, and it's this progress that has discredited the idea that disabled people can't be happy in the real world, and subsequently made LOTR's ending seem outdated by today's standards.

Now this is where the fanfiction comes in.

LOTR readers these days, who are aware of the progress we've made as a society and the new ways people view and treat minorities, often write fanfiction that puts things into Tolkien's universe that wouldn't have otherwise been there because of when the books were written, from openly queer characters to characters living good, happy lives with disabilities. And I think this is a good thing and it's really nice to see, especially in regards to Frodo's disability. I like seeing people work out how he might accommodate himself in the world of Middle Earth, and how the other characters would help him with that. I like that sometimes people have to get creative when figuring out how he would cope with trauma and chronic pain, because obviously Middle Earth doesn't have a lot of the things we have in the real world.

I like that we can finally give Frodo a chance to recover in a more realistic way than just sending him to the afterlife. I like that we can finally allow him to live.

A lot of Tolkien purists complain about new adaptations and fanfiction because "it's not what Tolkien wrote so he wouldn't like it". First of all, why do we still care about the opinions of a man who's been dead for over fifty years? What are you going to do, summon his ghost to haunt all the fanfic writers? Hold a seance to find out exactly what he thinks? Good luck with that.

Second of all, I honestly believe this is something he would approve of. He went on living after the First World War, but he didn't get to live with the disability accommodations we have today. And because he didn't, neither did Frodo. We can't give Tolkien the life many disabled people have now, but we can give it to his tragic hero. We can make his story a little less tragic. And if Tolkien was here now, of all the tropes we're using in LOTR fanfiction, it wouldn't surprise me if "Frodo stays in the Shire" is one he could get behind.

#lord of the rings #lotr #frodo baggins #tolkien #disability #disability in media #disability in fiction #fanfiction #i'm back on my essay-writing bullshit #this just came to me like five minutes ago and i wrote this instead of doing what i should be doing which is showering #so that's fun #just articulating my thoughts over here don't mind me

[theminecraftbee]

It's Mumbo who approaches Doc. His suit is askew, and he's loosened his tie, which is generally a very bad sign. Mumbo, for all he's a very poorly put-together person, normally leaves his clothes well put-together unless things have somehow gone very wrong indeed.

"Tell me, Doc," Mumbo says. "After the whole Easter Egg thing that I heard about--"

"I was very normal, comparatively!" Doc protests. "I was very, very normal!"

Mumbo pauses. "You know, I left town, so I can't dispute that."

Doc nods vigorously. "You can't dispute it at all. And, eh, Ren, if you're going to yell about him, he didn't have any eggs. He was briefly False's pet dog, though. I think it, eh, traumatized him."

Mumbo looks faintly dizzy. "Right. That. How did we solve that again?"

"That was all Cleo and Jevin," Doc says. "I know Cub has some of the surviving remnants in his museum. Why do you ask? Oh no, don't tell me you secretly still have one of the babies! What if it's lost and alone?"

"No, no, nothing like that! It's just that you dropped several thousand dragon eggs on Grian's base, is all."

Doc smirks. "A cunning revenge--"

"You covered Grian's base. In eggs," Mumbo says, very slowly, as though Doc might be particularly stupid. Doc stares back.

"Yeah. It's karmic revenge for the chickens," Doc says back, equally slowly.

"Doc I wasn't there but remind me how Grian reacted last time to the eggs," Mumbo says.

Doc thinks about it for a moment.

Doc's eyes widen.

"Mumbo, please tell me Grian is not--"

"The good news is that I think the server would crash if they hatched," Mumbo says mildly. "The bad news is that I'm his neighbor, and I very much want to kill you now."

"You're joking," Doc says, struck suddenly with the vision of what it would be like to live next to a Grian who is attempting to get broody over thousands of dragon eggs at once.

"Die," Mumbo says, and pulls out an end crystal. Doc doesn't even move. He deserves this one.

#hermitcraft #jevin's egg disaster #a bee fic #docm77 #mumbo jumbo #THAT'S RIGHT BABY IT'S EGG DISASTER TIME! #(just the one ficlet i'm not bringing the whole thing back) #look the joke entered my head and i HAD to make it #anyway in the egg disaster universe the egg problem eventually gets solved in a way that somehow leads into the king ren arc #and everyone treats it as just like. a normal thing that happened #and they all move on with their lives until DOC DECIDES TO DO A PRANK INVOLVING EGGS. THE FOOL. THE MORON.

[barnabybrainrot]

—-

#mod posts #idk dude i am so conflicted abt this ‘barnaby is overrated’ shit #on one hand im like… wow another person who feels he’s overrated. daring today are we? #on the other im like… i understand what its like when the character you like isnt the popular one in the community #like i normally tend to hyperfixate on the side characters so i absolutely know how frustrating it is #i also know from personal experience that a lot of it can just be hating it solely BECAUSE its popular #when i was like 14 and undertale came out i hated it just bc it was popular. and then i played it myself and yknow what? i enjoyed it #like… its okay not to like something!! everyone has unique tastes #and i also understand the concern abt barnaby being treated like snatcher (i know NOTHING abt snatcher so dont. quote me on that) #like theres a chance the ‘fanon’ version of barnaby will be given precedence over ‘canon’ #the same shit happened with sans. remember all those sans/reader fics where sans was this edgy mysterious guy? #yet in fanon hes just a funni little skeleton who likes bad jokes? #yet in *canon jesus christ i cant spell today #but like. can we just let people enjoy things if they arent hurting anyone? #like i get it its annoying sometimes. like i had to mute the oc tag bc i was tired of seeing RP stuff #but im not like. going into their inboxes and telling them theyre bad ppl for enjoying a popular character yknow? #sorry this is making like. no sense. and im sorry to put it in tags but i do NOT want this spreading #anyways. those are my thoughts for today.

[disabled-queer-culture-is]

Disabled culture is going to see a doctor about a new medical scare and being able to predict exactly what they’re going to suggest, because it’s the exact same thing every doctor tells you for everything

#disabled culture is #ableism tw #medical ableism #like. ma’am. i just had a terrifying experience and am seeking medical help to make sure it doesnt become a regular occurrence #you do not need to treat me like a toddler #‘just eat more and get your bmi to a better range and you’ll be fine :)’ MA’AM #i am aware i weigh about as much as a sopping wet kitten but i am not here about the autoimmune disease causing that #i am here because i fainted hit my head and felt like i was experiencing violet involuntary movement even though i wasn’t #anyway congrats to this doctor for taking two hours to tell me something i learned from talking with potsies like 6 years ago #anyway my shock thoughts are really funny. she pressed on my nails to check for dehydration and my single thought was #‘thats not how they did it on mythbusters >:(‘ #fr tho uhhh fainting is super scary and i salute everyone who deals with it regularly #also is it normal to like. #i felt like my head was jerking around and I couldn’t stop it and that lasted for like a full minute after i was aware again #couldn’t talk or move like my arms or anything while it was happening #doctor literally just waved me off when i asked. if anyone has any insight on why i felt like that when my head wasnt moving pls lemme know #also tbh i dont even know if it technically counts as fainting. my eyes were open the whole time apparently #but everything before and after the fall for about a minute is blank #anyway uh! we think im fine! no blood and probably no concussion the only thing with major damage is the wall lol

[lilgynt]

i think i like will so much bc something is deeply wrong with him at his core. something isn’t right. and it’s not any other reason but him. it’s not the empathy or autism it’s not his childhood it’s not even his work or jack and hannibal something is deeply wrong with will graham at his core with no outside influence and he hasn’t done anything wrong - hell his whole job is helping people, he collects strays off the road nurses them to health and keeps em especially the ugly ones, and generally is kind if not nice whether it’s a time he’s kind by instinct or pushing himself to be kind he still is and all of this just to say something is so wrong with him in such an inescapable way that he’s always 100% conscious and self aware to

#personal #mr graham i love uuuuuuuuuuuuu #even graham in the books #that scene with the stoner son and his like prison friend and graham is like i’m very angry at this guy bc he scares me so i’m threateningt #to send him back to prison to feel more secure or whatever the passage was graham i think of you daily #and that line where jack is like i think wills knows exactly what’s happening in his head and that’s why he doesn’t want anyone in there #will graham could live a perfectly polished life from his birth to death never do wrong by anyone or thing once and even if everyone around #him treated him normally and his empathy didn’t get in his way i think will graham could still perfectly #understand laying in bed curled up staring at nothing bc something is not right and it’s not even something you can pinpoint or NAME #it’s just. an understanding and a drop in ur stomach that doesn’t end #anyway i think hannibal and will dealt with the awareness’s that sormthing was wrong/ other about them Completely different and it’s a lil #funny

[theheadlessgroom]

https://www.tumblr.com/beatingheart-bride/707201367926849536/theheadlessgroom-beatingheart-bride

@beatingheart-bride

At this, Randall wanted to protest; he wanted to wave it all off, to say “I was just doing what anyone would do!”, but he knew that just wasn’t true. She was right, most people in the opera house probably wouldn’t have sacrificed a whole day, a day spent running the risk of getting sick while running errands, bringing her food and drink and keeping her company, no, he was sure most wouldn’t have done such a thing...he still wanted to protest, to say it was nothing, but ultimately, he found he just couldn’t argue anymore.

Despite the difficulty he had in wrapping his head around the whole thing, he nevertheless willed himself to believe her (difficult as that was), swallowing hard as he managed to saying, “W-Well, you’re...you’re very welcome, E-Emily, I...I was just glad I could help!”

He blushed again and averted his gaze, half-expecting her to laugh at his incompetence when it came to rudimentary matters like accepting thanks...he kicked himself a little for thinking Emily would do such a thing, reminding himself that she wasn’t like those who used to point and laugh at him, that she wouldn’t do such a thing, but still, he had that moment of expectation before he glanced back at her, smiling shyly behind the mask.

#((it isn't-but it's accurate! randall knows how to be kind *but* responding to/accepting kindness? that's a different story!)) #((and i know i certainly can't see erik being so chummy (for lack of a better word) with the people of the opera!)) #((erik's relationship to the people there is more like a king and his subjects; he has this sort of superiority complex)) #((-probably because he's been treated as lesser for so long; he's taking the opportunity to be at the top of the food chain for a change-)) #((and so he puts himself above everyone else; he wants them to bend to his will and do as he commands)) #((and when they don't he throws a temper tantrum!)) #((but randall...doesn't really put himself on a pedestal the way erik does! he *is* the opera ghost and he still sends out his notes)) #((but he's not nearly as aggressively demanding as erik is! in some ways i think he just wants to be a man)) #((not a 'king' the way erik is; ruling over his domicile with an iron fist!)) #((instead he just wants to be able to rub elbows with the common man! he likes listening to the stagehands talk about their lives)) #((he likes sending well wishes to people when he hears something good has happened to them)) #((he just wants to be a normal man; he doesn't want to be above others anymore than he wants to be beneath them!)) #((he might not be able to be really truly sociable with people but he tries! you just couldn't see erik doing such a thing)) #((and it's one of the differences between the two of them that i'm glad has come up!)) #outofhatboxes #beatingheart-bride #V:Phantasm of the Mansion

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

not me thinking about how just bc i can’t write for rodrigue week, bc first i had covid and then i had a biopsy and now i have to wait for my elbow/arm to heal,

doesn’t mean i can’t just integrate something for him into miklan weekend

#DCB Comments #by which i mean. miklan and roddydad interacting #bc let me tell you. glenn and miklan? boyfriends. or at least well the closest thing to boyfriends outside of glenn being engaged #BUT LISTEN! LISTEN TO ME! miklan was causing trouble in houses in fraldarius territory! fraldarius territory!! #what if miklan was always you know bleh crests stupid inheritance ima be a baddie and that'll teach 'em -puts on sunglasses- #BUT THEN LIKE. after glenn died he just kinda. lost it. and got worse. and it was like. the one good thing in his life was gone #so he stopped holding back and wanted revenge on the world for treating him like trash ever since sylvain was born #one day rodrigue wants to talk to him. maybe it happens when he's causing bullshit in roddy's territory! #but he remembers! he does! he remembers miklan with glenn and how he used to actually be normal with him! smile around him! #how he wasn't a bandit around glenn! don't think he doesn't remember!! #roddydad well he knows miklan was angry bc he could never be with glenn bc of the arranged marriage with ingrid #and mikky knew ingrid and glenn loved each other even if him and glenn were kinda a thing #but!!! roddydad is DAD! he KNOWS when something's up! he saw mikky as his son in law just like ingrid was his daughter in law! #just like he sees sylvain as his son in love bc of fefe (just bc they're not together yet doesn't mean he doesn't see it he's no fool!)!!! #mikky is just as much family to him as everyone else!!! glenn cared about him!!! he knew mikky a lil bit as well! #he knows it's bc of old customs that mikky has suffered and bc matthias is a grumpy lil butt! #he's tried many times to get matthias to be a better parent bc he loves his best friend and wants him to have a happy family!!! #but matthias just... isn't mattydaddy!!! he's just matthias!!! he's not much of a dad dude you know??? #so roddydaddy will be like a father in his place if that's what it takes to get mikky a better life!!! #I'M TELLING YOU WHAT IF RODRIGUE WAS THE ONE TO SAVE MIKKY IN HOUSES AND GIVE HIM A PROPER HOME #I'M TELLING YOU THAT WHAT IF SOMEONE FINALLY STEPPED UP TO RIGHT THE WRONGS OF THE PAST CUSTOMS #AND GIVE MIKLAN A /PLACE/ BC RODDY KNOWS THIS IS ALL WRONG AND NOBODY SHOULD HAVE TO FEEL THAT WAY #NOBODY SHOULD HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS. RODDY HE KNOWS THAT. SO HE'LL GIVE MIKKY THAT CHANCE #BUT MIKKY HAS TO PROMISE HE'LL BE GOOD! BEHAVE! HE CAN'T HURT FELIX OR SYLVAIN! IF HE DOES HE'S IN BIG BIG BIG DOODOO! #HE'S ALREADY HURT SYLVAIN AND RLY THAT /IS/ MATTHIAS' RESPONSIBILITY TO HANDLE. BUT FELIX? #OH IF HE HURTS RODDY'S SON HIS SON MY SON FELIX RODDYDADDY'S SON HE'S GETTIN' S M A C K E D #BUT HE DOES PROMISE THAT IF MIKKY IS GOOD DUDE HE WILL BE TREATED AS GOOD DUDE! WHAT IF RODRIGUE SAVED HIM THO #LISTEN TO ME FELLAS WHAT IF RODRIGUE SAVED MIKKY

[lakemichigans]

i can’t find the post now but i’ve seen people talking about how gender neutral / unisex bathrooms have become just another word for “trans bathrooms” which defeats the whole point of them because they’re supposed to be NEUTRAL. they’re not supposed to say anything about the identity of the person. anyway i can’t find the post but now that they’ve added gender neutral bathrooms to my college i see this so much.... i love using the neutral bathrooms because 1. they’re closer to my class and 2. who give a shit. but i walked in there the other day and someone from my class called from the hallway “you know the women’s bathroom is down the other hall right?” and i had to check the sign to make sure i wasn’t walking into the men’s bathroom or something, i was so confused. i was like “yeah but it’s fine, this is for everyone” and she just gave me a weird look and left. like?? imagine being THIS closed minded

#if someone had bad intentions and wanted to corner me in the bathroom they would simply ignore the sign on the door #point blank. it's very simple #off the top of my head i can think of two people who were murdered in the girl's bathroom (sherrice iverson and colleen ritzer) #the perpetrator's were not trans or gnc in any way. they were cis men who just walked right into the women's bathroom #i'm not sure why people think a sign on the door will stop anyone #the only thing a gender neutral bathroom will do is make things safer for trans people #but that won't happen if we keep treating these bathrooms as like. 'other' #so anyway my point is - if you have a gender neutral bathroom available to you you should use it!! especially if you're cis! #it's the same concept as stating your pronouns even if you're cis #it helps to normalize it for everyone

[strwbrymlkshake]

im the sleepiest guy in the world rn gn yangang I will talk to you tomorrow <3

#mine #i rarely ever do nightly or morningly posts bc i feel like theyre redundant for me but this is an excuse to talk in tags lol #WELL um i have a lot to do tomorrow and thats gonna be annoying bc as you can see it is the time it is rn. #ive been up doing my thing. feeling a lil funky and invested in my superiority complex yet again #would u guys still like me if i devoted time everyday to scaring people i hate :( well you guys probably just like to watch me be insane so #i totally wanna post all the gory details about my evil excursions but im so paranoid. hot boy shit #well the most i can say is ive been getting a kick out of horrendous deeds lately. which is weird bc mentally ive been BETTER #like im morally responsible and everything but i still harass people i despise for personsl fulfillment. whats up with that. #i never forget what they did to me ^_^ and the good part is im playing nice with them so they think its over. and im not a suspect #but theres just such a surplus of people who want to harass them that im ruled out entirely its so fucking funny #also thank you people who want them dead too and sometimes harass them instead of me i love uu<3 my besties fr #🪳 #i commit truly horrible acts to satiate the bottomless pit inside of me <3 but only to people who deserve it #im coherent im not doing this out of raw emotion. im devoted to it. im determined to step on her and watch her die #to any frightened readers . #im normal about like everyone else i promise its just a handful of people i would slaughter on sight #well anyways i think my malice is satisfied for tonight gn<3<3<3 #also im dreaming of the day where i find a nice malicious husbsnd and we can terrorize people together. romance at its finest #i take pride in the fact i actually do the shit everyone thinks of doing. i want to know what would happen. like a scientist #im craving this awesome breakfast place by my house anon im taking u there sometime to treat you. wait this isnt the ask post. hell

[neuropteran]

thinking abt my ex a lot lately for some reason and i had the perfect chance to bring her up to someone recently but idk i find it soooooo hard to share that kind of thing even when i want to. idk why i still feel the need to be so secretive about it, esp when it makes me feel shitty when ppl dont take my relationship advice seriously in a ”what do you even know about this” way.

#it’s just. i don’t know #I don’t like ppl knowing things about me. #It’s embarrassing how badly I met some ppl treat me you know. How I was willing to put up with stuff #It’s like. I’ve compromised my whole life so much I don’t even know how to ask for myself and it’s like. #god. Something happened the other day and I was telling ppl and everyone reacted way more extremely than I did to it #And im just thinking now like oh. god. do I think this kind of thing is normal lmao. #My friend kept asking me if I was okay and it was like yeah I’m fine it’s over now lol it wasn’t that bad but like. #Now I’m thinking I reacted wrong to this. #i also only recently realised how badly this one girl treated me and I always used to act like it was a funny story lmao </3 #it’s not even funny it’s like #either a poor reflection on me (possible) or like. idk just the worst dating story for general stuff #all my dating stories suck. I don’t want ppl to know what I’m apparently willing to forgive bc I don’t deserve better #It’s. #im

[just-rogi]

.

#I’m so fuckjng sick of my fucking relationship with food #I’m always so fucking miserable and scared and angry over it #why can’t I just eat what the fuck #I’m a rational adult #I was doing so good for like two years #and then idk what happened but a few months ago everything went bad again #and it’s not every day but man it’s been happening more and more #and I can’t fuckjng stand it #I’m miserable when I’m hungry and I’m miserable when I’m eating #and I’m always crying #and it’s not fair I’m just so tired of fighting this thing #I hate how ed is treated by the general population because almost everyone who doesn’t experience it #doesn’t fucking get it #and every single ed clinic is actually worse than prision like the abuse people in recovery go through in hospitals and clinics is terrify #it’s so fucking hard to live like this and I can just get up and go to work and do my job and live my life like normal #i get that recovery isn’t linear but oh my god #it feels like this is just how it’s always going to be forever and I can’t stop that #what? am I just doomed to a life of Diet Coke and chewing gum and bullion broth? #and not for nothing the fact that EDs are never taken seriously or treated as a moral failing or the butt of a joke CONSTANTLY in media #and are under researched #because they predominantly effect women makes me so angry #but I don’t even have the energy to be angry because I’m so cold and tired all the fucking time and all I can do now is read and draw #and sleep and I hate leaving my bedroom and I hate everything about it #and even after all of this my doctor still looked me in the eyes and told me to lose 35 lbs #as if I’m not already a size fuckjng small and five feet tall?? how can you look me in the eyes and tell me I should look into l #a ‘calorie deficit’ to try to lose weight when I’m not eating as is #like gee sure I’ll stop eating my rice and green onions ok #yeah sure I’m sure my friends will love to hear that I’m trying to lose weight after every single one of them makes an effort to eat with me #because I’m such a fuckjng baby they don’t trust me to do it on my own and they are fucking right #I can’t take this bullshit there’s no winning and I’m just tired of it I feel so stupid

[bravesaboteur]

The more I think about it, the more Laios and Falin's different perceptions of their parents are a case of "same parents, different childhood".

Whenever someone asks Laios about his and Falin's family, he comments on how they treated Falin but never comments about how how their childhood affected him - in fact, he kind of glosses over it. It's Falin that everyone is rallying to save, it's Falin that's Marcille's friend, it's Falin that everyone has a positive opinion of - he's just the weirdo brother that gets to share some of her light sometimes. He's the one who's only tolerated when he's useful in a dungeon. Falin's treatment is a large part of the reason that he left, but it's the symptom of a larger issue.

When we see Laios' thoughts of his parents in his nightmares, it's all about the expectations that he's supposed to live up to: the expectation to stop being "childish", the expectation to get married (to who his parents picked) and have children, the expectation to take over from his father as the village chief, the expectation to adapt to something that he isn't able to be in the way that people want him to. And these are all things that he has had to be told in some way: he had to be told that Shuro didn't like him, he had to be told that told that the gold-peelers were taking advantage of him - these aren't thoughts that just appeared on their own, these are all failures that someone has explicitly pointed out to him and they haunt him. Some of the things he considers his biggest failures are his failure to provide for and protect Falin and those have very tangible examples he can point to.

We get a glimpse of what happens when he fails to live up to his father's expectations when Falin is born. He expects a certain reaction from Laios and when he fails to give that reaction he physically puts him down, dismisses him, and underestimates how much he understands.

And that's something that's shown to be a bit of a sore point for him - people thinking that he doesn't understand something because he doesn't express himself like people expect. The few times we see him snap at people are because people think he isn't understanding something because he isn't reacting "normally".

On Falin's side, the expectations seem to be a lot different - she's the younger one, for one, she's a girl, and she was so young when the fallout from her having magic happened. She too had an arranged engagement, but that was broken off when she was sent away to magic school and since then, their parents only seem to be passively involved in her life. She's mostly been freed of the expectations that their parents had for her in her village - she won't be coming back after all. She understands why they sent her away, she wasn't completely oblivious to the villagers treatment of her and it was, arguably, for the best so she is at peace with what their relationship is for now. But she still wants to go to her hometown and see for herself with adult eyes because she has never really had the space to do that.

I don't think their parents are inherently evil people - the truth is probably somewhere between Laios and Falin's version of the story, Laios' side tinged by too much cynicism and Falin's by too much naivete.

It just strikes me that when he tried to provide the "normal" way he failed, but given the space to do something similar to what people expected of him, but in his own way, he succeeded. He isn't perfect but his efforts are ultimately fruitful and he is able to carve out a place for himself, Falin, and others who had been ostracized like them to call home.

#dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #dunmeshi analysis #laios touden #falin touden #i have a lot of touden feelings #i'm not letting mama and papa touden off the hook that easy #dunmeshi spoilers

[mothheart]

im a lot more used to my stuff not tending to get traction the way a lot of other fics and stuff does in fandom spaces (which is fine and not a dig it's just how it is) so when there's people who not only comment on like maybe a few things but will comment on like almost all of my stuff and make a point of telling me how much they like my stuff it gives me literally every single good brain chemical

#on one hand obviously you should definitely write for yourself but also #that IS what i already do. the things i post are whatever i happen to love so much and also feel brave enough to actually put out into the #world bc any amount of reasons that i feel strongly enough that it might be something even one other person would like #and anyway i think the way a lot of people have started to treat ppl wanting attention on their works as a moral failing or whatever is #really weird ! #its normal and fine to hope and want for people to tell you their thoughts and etc on the things you are brave enough to put into the world #bc its not an easy thing by any means. not for me anyway. esp with bad fandom experiences in the past lol #and i think also not everyone realizes how much the positive feedback and stuff is genuinely appreciated #like i hope everyone whos ever left extensive detailed comments on my stuff knows how much i appreciate them especially #its a good thing and its never ever annoying or any kind of bad. for me. and probably its the same for just about everyone else who writes #uh. yeah thats it i just had thoughts again bc some people are So Nice it does feel good especially after getting #a bit insecure about my stuff being Less Popular #yk #miles rambles