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pummelingbat · 5 months

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Persecution Complex, or: "Just You, Me, And The Weight Of Your Dead Girlfriend Between Us"

#reanimator #reanimator 1985 #herbert west #dan cain #danbert #bride of reanimator #my art #this is the only comic piece from my zine im gonna post here i think. im trying to show SOME self restraint.#but im too geeked abt how this one turned out... want to share The Vision #i may get scared and delete. im shy abt my comic writing. but.#have an early installation in the Gay Herbert West Character Study ive been drawing all year.#shoutout to tumblr auto cropping longer posts now. so i at least dont feel inconsiderate formatting this vertically lol.

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shigayokagayama · 1 year

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adhd reigen not in a “hes so goofy and silly” way but in a “he has a tendency to hyperfixate on things then drop them the moment he gets bored, has trouble forming genuine relationships with people because he’s so dedicated to making himself likable, is terrified of rejection and actively self sabotages to avoid it” kinda way

#all the random ass unrelated skills he has... glances nervously at all the unfinished projects i have #mob psycho characters are so good at being accurate representations of mental illnesses without even trying #maybe one day ill write that 'npd teru' analysis but for now im too scared of getting harassed by ableist weirdos #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #reigen arataka

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cerise-on-top · 3 months

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Hugging, Kissing and Cuddling HCs for König

I'm trying to see him in another light again after everything I've seen about him, so I decided I'd write something fluffy and nice for him. And then came the realization I never wrote some HCs like these for him in my original posts, so I decided I'd change that! He's Austrian, so naturally I have to love him!

When it comes to hugging someone, König is a bit hesitant. Considering he’s not the most physically affectionate person out there, it’s almost an honor to be receiving an unprompted hug from him. Whether his hugs are long or short depends on the occasion: If he’s proud of you for accomplishing something, then the hug will be rather short lived. Though, he might pick you up and spin you around until you’re dizzy. If you’re sad and need some comfort then his hugs could last a while. He’s not the best with words, he prefers to listen to other people, but if he knows a hug is what usually helps you then he’s willing to do so. Despite being a big and strong lad his hugs are surprisingly gentle, he’s worried about crushing you. He could put his all into them, but then you’d likely end up with a few broken ribs and he doesn’t want that to happen. König is also surprisingly warm, so receiving a hug from him is a rare, but nice experience. Although he does go rigid at the beginning, not knowing what to do, but relaxes into the hug eventually.

Again, he’s not a very physically affectionate person, but isn’t opposed to the occasional peck on the cheek or on your lips either. There is some anxiety whether you’d actually want a kiss from him or not, so he doesn’t kiss you very often, even if you do reassure him that it’s quite alright. He’s a bit tense at first when he presses a kiss to your lips, but calms down eventually. It’s especially bad during the beginning of your relationship, but he’s since gotten better at being calm about it. Since there’s a good chance he’s taller than you he loves giving you a kiss on the forehead. It’s a small but sweet gesture. He doesn’t need to bend down entirely to reach you but he still gets to be affectionate with you. However, if you’re on the taller side, or just as tall as he is, then he’d love to receive kisses to his temple from you. It makes him smile every time you do it. If he’s in the mood for receiving a kiss then he’ll lay his head on your shoulder and nudge you a bit. Or try to get his head in your closer vicinity. Kind of like that one bunny video where the bunny stretches to receive some kisses.

Cuddles with him are a bit more common than hugs actually. However, he refuses to lay down on top of you. If you’re shorter and weaker than him then there’s no chance he’ll put his weight on you, he’s just that afraid of hurting you. If you’re taller or just more muscular, then he might, but he’s still a rather heavy lad. Most he’ll do is put his head on your shoulder while you’re cuddling in bed and are both lying down. Although it’d be a lie to say he doesn’t want to be held. König is alright with being the one to hold you, but sometimes he would prefer to be the little spoon as well. That urge gets especially bad if you’re roughly the same size as him. Sometimes just nuzzling into your chest does the trick for him as well, though. Loves it when you run your fingers through his hair as he does so. Another thing he adores is you sleeping on his chest as he holds you. He gets to hold you close, he gets to protect you and he gets to doze off a bit himself, it’s bliss to him. Sometimes he leans down to press a kiss to your head and accidentally wakes you up like that. He feels bad about it and apologizes profusely, but does chuckle a bit when he sees your disheveled hair and your tired expression that shows you just woke up.

#cod #cod x reader #konig #könig #konig x reader #könig x reader #he actually kind of scares me these days even if I don't want that to happen in the slightest so I'm trying to desensitize myself again #I know people always joke about fanon könig vs canon könig but I think I will write him a bit softer with his s/o again #just to combat all those awful things I've seen about him that I don't want to be true and that I also want to forget about #könig is a big lad so I knew from the beginning I wanted him to be good at hugging because this is self indulgent #I feel like if it weren't for his anxiety he'd be much much cuddlier #because that's the case with me even if I have other things going on as well #and what is a funny character you write about if not another piece of yourself?#I've put so much of myself into some of these characters and yet people keep requesting them so I must be doing something right #it's more fun that way as well when you put your characters through something you've gone through. more relatable too #but I think that's something pretty much every writer does. that's why some requests are so difficult to write #I got one about marrying Laswell and Nikolai and that was a difficult request for me because the last wedding I went to #was my parents' and that was almost 18 years ago. man time flies I was 4 years old back then #so naturally I don't remember much either. But I tried and that's what's important!#either way please enjoy this piece of fluff I wrote today!

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weadapt · 11 months

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I think it’s interesting storytelling how in the beginning of the game Cal says the Sixth Sister’s name, Masana Tide, and reminds her of who she used to be—and it visibly distresses her because it hurts what was done to her and Cal isn’t wrong in what he’s saying. The shocking thing for me was the moment when Cal said “It’s time to set you free”. It was such a surreal feeling hearing Cal say that, those kinds of words, to know he decided it was time to strike her down; it’s understandable because she killed his entire crew, but for Cal to be the executioner in that way was scary to see coming after only experiencing the young kid he was in Fallen Order. Now you really get the feeling Cal has been through a lot, he’s grown as a man since Fallen Order and he’s calloused, not entirely in a bad way given he’d have to be to survive but still in a depressing way, as a result. I know overall and gameplay wise, Cal has killed a lot of people, it’s nothing new, but storytelling wise it’s a serious moment for Cal. It’s a moment you know is going to follow him the rest of the game for character development. After he kills her, it’s made clear by the music and by Cal’s body language that this isn’t a good thing coming from him. It isn’t a triumph. Even BD-1 knows and worries for Cal with his little “Boop…?” and Cal is only able to respond rather shakily, “Yeah… I’m okay”.

When he meets up with Bode and Bravo and they ask him what happened to the Inquisitor, he gives a simple, no emotion, “Dead”. The long pause of Bravo not saying anything in response to me says a lot; it feels like he isn’t used to Cal having a reaction like that.

Then we have Rayvis. Cal defeats him in battle and asks him to join in the fight against Dagan. He doesn’t want to kill Rayvis—“You don’t have to do this”. The oddly tragic part to me is that Rayvis has dreams of seeing Tanalorr again. If Dagan succeeds his dream will be realized, but he’s given up on the dream and wants a warrior’s death now. He wants to die, and in his mind, honorably, by Cal’s hands, and he’s going to force Cal to do it. But for Cal it’s another execution on his part. He pauses before he lifts his saber and kills Rayvis. It isn’t a triumph. Again we’re given a sudden swell of music to tell us the emotion behind the action of killing Rayvis. You can see it’s affected Cal badly. BD-1 seems to ask Cal the same question as before, “Boop…?” but this time Cal doesn’t acknowledge the question and just replies, “We should go”.

Killing Dagan hurts for Cal too. Dagan is a Jedi, someone who held onto the Order, who tied his entire identity to it and all of his goals are focused on restoring the Order and fighting to change the universe. Just like Cal in a way. Dagan is single-mindedly focused on the mission, so obsessively, he lost himself and the one he loved as a result. Cal understands and see the parallel of that kind of drive in his own mission against the Empire and it terrifies him. Dagan could’ve helped him fight the Empire but it became another tragic moment of having to kill a once fellow Jedi. This is another tragedy. Bode doesn’t care about Dagan being dead on the floor but Cal does. Cal has enough respect to place Dagan’s lightsaber on his chest. Cal pauses to reflect but Bode immediately gets back to getting the compass.

We have this interesting arch of reactions to killing his opponents. They were each killed for the mission. It was necessary. They each started the fight against him. No matter the reason though, it’s still very painful for Cal.

Cal is being pushed into this direction of forcing him to question his beliefs and who he is. His whole identity at this point has been tied to the Order, of being a Jedi, and it’s very clear by his conversations in Fallen Order that it really matters to who he is. By the end of Survivor, we have three fallen Jedi: Masana Tide, Dagan Gera, and Bode Akuna. So who is Cal Kestis? What will he become? Is he doomed to fall like they did? That’s what troubles him—“Let’s just say I don’t wanna end up like him [Dagan]”.

He’s afraid he’s going to lose himself.

The fear is almost realized when he’s about to kill another opponent. The one behind the murders of his friends and mentors. Cal’s been killing each of his main opponents up to the point at Nova Garon—this one will be no different. Except killing the man who sent Bode on the mission to infiltrate his team is different. Cal is on the edge of losing himself to the Dark Side. In Fallen Order he pleaded for Cere not to use the Dark Side because “She’s stronger than that”, “[she] still had a choice”. But Cal is failing to remember any of that for himself. He wants to kill because he’s angry, grieving, and in immense pain. Merrin has to bring him back—“This is not you!” There’s a question of whether or not Cal would’ve been able to stop himself if Merrin hadn’t been there though.

When we get to the final battle, Merrin is warning Cal of what’s likely going to happen but he ignores her for a while which prompts her to say, “Well? Say something!” He doesn’t want to acknowledge that Merrin is right and they’re likely going to have to kill Bode, and with that, taking Kata’s father away—a loss of family Cal and Merrin know too much about. So they both try and give Bode every chance to stop and turn away from what he’s done, despite how much Bode had hurt them. Sadly, Cal once again is forced into using the Dark Side to prevent Bode from killing Merrin. It was worth it. It was worth using it to save Merrin. He couldn’t let her be killed. He couldn’t see that happen before his eyes like he had with all of his friends and mentors.

After everything is over, there’s this sickly feeling left behind. Not simply because of Bode’s death, but because of the impact on Merrin realizing Kata has lost family just like she and Cal had, but also because of the impact the death of Bode has on Cal. And after Cal carries away Bode’s body, the music changes to an eerie, ominous, high pitch, minor key when we see Cal board the Mantis. The kind of change in music which lets the audience know there’s something seriously wrong. Things are different now. Cal’s different. And he knows it.

He’s lost in time watching the pyre, reflecting on everything that had happened but also on how grateful he is to Cere, but he knows the impact of her loss will continue to be with him for the rest of his life. Just like Jaro Tapal. Another guiding force in his life is gone. With Cere and Cordova gone, there is no longer any Jedi wisdom to seek out. He’s now alone in that way as a Jedi.

“I’m scared… I almost lost myself… I don’t know if I’m ready.”

Cal and the audience are left with the dreadful realization—

“I don’t know if I’m ready for what comes next”.

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earlgodwin · 8 months

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"One thing that I've always said about Juan is that every action that he does is heartfelt and genuine. When it was the war against the French, he was there and he was going to go to war, even though he knew he was going to die. He saw them getting ripped apart, but he was there and he was going to do it. I believe if Lucrezia hadn't come over, he would have led all his troops into death. I don't think there's anything that he's done which was through general cowardice. In terms of his survival, he died how he lived, and that's laudable, in itself." — David Oakes.

#it just gets to me that juan is a kid who has no fucking clue what he's doing since his dad gave him a position that's difficult for him #and as much as he was scared to death of the french army and witnessing his troops being torn to shreds...#he was willing to die to protect rome and impress his dad because he's terrified knowing that his dad trusts and confides only in cesare #the family's fuck-up trying not fuck up?#the only reason juan retreated is because of his love for lucrezia and how she would be upset if he died and he can't have THAT #the writing was so biased against him because they were too busy propping up cesare i fear but alas #anyways juan borgia deserved better. being completely discarded by his family is such a tragic fate for a character.#a character who's storyline is trying to impress them but they've always ganged up on him which is annoying #juan borgia #david oakes #the borgias #theborgiasedit #periodedits #perioddramaedit #weloveperioddrama #juan x lucrezia #dailyworldcinema #tvarchive #cinemapix #by jen

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 8 months

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hm ok so for a while i was thinking that Wally, for the most part, only perceives reality as "Home", the neighborhood. that's his entire world, it's all he knows

but then i slapped myself and went wait. the Live Interview. Wally has been outside of Home, and has interacted with humans (presuming that the interview did actually happen, of course). and through Wally's interactions - or rather, attempt at interactions with Us, the QA, and the WHRP, it can be strongly assumed that he knows that there's an Elsewhere. there are places outside of Home. maybe he doesn't quite understand that there's another reality of sorts, but there's no way he's unaware that there's more than just the neighborhood out there

(and then of course there's the fact that Clown has said that humans are deeply involved (not a direct quote, im paraphrasing) in Welcome Home. maybe Wally interacted with them / regularly interacted with them. there could have been an adjustment period after he gained consciousness where humans helped him learn how to walk/talk/fine motor skills - this could be why he has such a seemingly inherent / desperate trust in Us & the WHRP & the QA... humans made him and cared for him. it's possible he could view them as a sort of higher power to trust & have faith in

& maybe he's been off-set or could go off-set. i mean, the houses' rooms were all different sets - the buildings themselves were empty husks, right? who's to say Wally wouldn't physically walk to the individual set pieces whenever he went over to someone's house (but then that leads me into speculation on how the puppets' consciousness works and how multiple copies of them could co-exist and wondering which is the - im getting off track. but there's all of that and then the two part "you're okay!" art pieces of Wally & Eddie, which are technically canon - dont quote me on that - and that's Another ramble/theory post i could go on about & have strong feelings on. Anyway!)

"but wait," i hear someone protest, "what about Barnaby? he was in the Live Interview too"

but was he? was he really? was that Barnaby, or was that a person in a suit playing the character Barnaby B. Beagle? i mean, if it was Barnaby, there had to be some memory fuckery going on that prevented him from either fully comprehending/realizing the situation, or just made him forget as soon as it was over.

and actually wait, Wally has to be aware of the reality discrepancy. because it was certainly him in the Interview as himself. He had to have understood on some level that either that wasn't really Barnaby, or that Barnaby wouldn't remember the interview.

(there's a connection in my head between all of this & how he would view an apple pie. "it isn't the same anymore. something's different". but i can't pin it down for the life of me.)

and with the Talking Telephone calls, Wally explicitly tells Us that he's not going to tell anyone who was behind the calls. i remember listening to the "original" prank call audio tests, which while were very similar to the canon in-website ones, have a few changes. one of which was Wally - in the tests - saying that the others weren't ready to meet Us yet. now in canon that tidbit has been swapped out for "You have to go too. You have work to do" but i think it's still implied through Wally's purposeful withholding-of-information that he doesn't think the others are ready to know. or he straight up doesn't want them to know

i mean, one little theory i previously had is that Wally wants them all to catch on to the nature of their reality and situation, but he doesn't want to - or Can't - tell them outright. they have to figure it out. and that can't was either something keeping him quiet, or because if they learned too soon / inorganically, their little puppet heads would pop into confetti like Red Guy's in dhmis 4

However my views have Changed and i'm pretty sure Wally is purposefully not telling anyone to maintain the illusion that everything is fine and can continue on as it always has. maybe it comes from a place of protectiveness, of love? whatever the motive i think he wants them all to keep being unaware and dare i say, Complacent while he "fixes" their situation.

which is delusional, but we all know Wally is digging his metaphorical claws into a desperate bid to keep everything the same / return it to its original state, leaving bloody scratches in something already rotted. or something like that!

all this to say i think it's interesting how it seems that he's the only one aware of humans / an outside/other world, yet he's so determined to stay in his lane. he wants connection & communication yet he doesn't want to leave or change. he wants help in keeping things the same (some could say in keeping Our reality & his separated) but in the process he's dooming everyone/everything and tearing down those walls himself

(Wally: i'm going to stay where i am, and you're gonna stay where you are, and we're gonna help each other keep me and my friends where we're meant to be. anyway i wonder what this sledgehammer does)

#this is a very disjointed ramble but when are they ever put together!#i have to start at point a to get to point 36 yk yk #trying to write down my thoughts is like trying to keep a firm grip on a lubed up ferret #SOAPED!!! SOAPED UP!!! I MEANT SOAP yk that doesnt make it any better. anyway moving on dont look at me #its. its. the more i think about wally the more i go insane #like he's got neurosis stacked on neurosis stacked on-#there is something soooo wrong with him <3 #homebogging #welcome home speculation #wh speculation #i do think his heart is in the right place. i do think he's trying to achieve something he thinks is good & best for everyone #but... despite being aware of more than his friends... technically knowing more Truth than them #he's more trapped by that knowledge. he's ruled by it. and he doesn't really have the -#i dont want to say capacity bc i have to believe that he Can change. he just doesnt know how / currently doesnt want to / is too scared to #but he doesn't have the freedom the others have. bc in their ignorance they can ignore their confines #in a way they're more real than wally despite living in a fabricated world as fabricated people with fabricated lives #they're authentic in their ignorance #and ive said it before and ill say it again - wally was created as a blank slate while everyone else already had a Foundation #no matter how false their memories are they Have them. they have the tools to change and want change #they already perceive themselves as more than what they were made for. they think they're People (not humans - people) dont they?#so if they learn theyre trapped... they'll want out. meanwhile wally is already stuck bc while they have - in a way - More #the neighborhood & the show are all wally has. he knows there's outside but he doesnt have any reason to Want that outside #bc why would he want to leave home? why would he want anything to change? it's his sole purpose isnt it?#idk i just think wally would benefit from being told 'you dont need a purpose / you dont need to adhere to a purpose / you are enough as Yo #doing what You want. you can just Be'#but yk. what was i talking about again #oh yeah - wally is so so aware and yet so in the dark #he's got one half of the puzzle but they're all corner/edge pieces and he's trying to fill the inside space with Nothing #hm. i wonder if he'll end up needing the other neighbors to help finish the puzzle... who's to say who's to say!!#FUCK YOU TUMBLR I HAD MORE TO SAY. CUT OFF AGAIN AGH

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sweetly-yours-and-mine · 1 year

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“i’m never more at peace than i am in your arms.” with Steven Grant

Pairing: Steven Grant x Reader

Word Count: 887

A/N: Just opened up my askbox for some requests!

Warnings: fluff, hurt/comfort if you squint, poorly-edited

The service had been a lovely one. The reception even lovelier.

The reception is even lovelier.

Having stepped outside of the venue and into the cooled heat of the summer night for a moment’s rest from the festivities, you feel as if it was all a memory, a misfiring of neurons that made you believe that the day had truly happened.

You’re tired, tuckered out. The type that only comes from not eating enough and feeling too much.

Your bones ache, there’s a film of something stuck to your skin and inside your lungs. You’ve spent too much of the day outside, with too many people you’d spend at most an hour with.

A grating static is littered like chalk dust inside your mind. The more you try to wipe it away the worse it gets.

A rumble of laughter flows out from the open window, and it goes straight to your head in the worst of ways.

It’s a horrid combination of too many things that, each one in moderation, would be alright to handle but put together like this are too much at once.

You’re oversaturated.

There’s an increase and decrease in noise as the door opens and closes, the bit of a drag on the second step that lets you know that everything is going to be alright, that you no longer need to struggle to keep the cracking mask on.

“Hiya love,” his voice is warm, like the sun. “Everything alright? Lost each other in there, didn’t we? For a bit.” His arm comes to curl around your waist, he pulls you close to him.

Everything is alright now.

Guilt crawls up your throat at the poorly-hidden worry in his voice, “Sorry about that.” He’s wearing the cologne you got him for Valentine’s three years ago. He’s on his second bottle now. “Didn’t mean to run off.”

“Well you didn’t go very far,” Steven shrugs. The movement against your own body is a redemption in itself. There’s a purr of laughter around his voice, “If anything I’d say it was a piss-poor attempt at running off.”

You smile and laugh, breathing coming to you a little bit easier now that his body is warming yours up, now that it’s just the two of you again. “Didn’t take you long to find me.”

He shrugs again. You suppose there isn’t an answer to that anyways, the pull between you and Steven inexplicable, though entirely tangible to the both of you.

“You feelin’ alright, though, dearie? Somethin’ on your mind?” His free hand presses against your forehead, the side of your face. There’s a dimple between his eyebrows.

You turn and look up at him, pressing the length of your body into his side. Even the rub of the fabric of his pants against your skin is enough, the truth of his own skin underneath shining through it all like seaglass.

You know for a fact there’s a dopey grin on your face. Your arms come to circle around his neck like Saturn’s rings, your fingers come to play with the ends of his hair, “Just you.”

“You wanna go home? Really, I wouldn’t mind, the band was gettin’ a bit on my nerves if I’m being honest,” he turns away for a moment, his voice dropping to a grumbling tone like it always does when he complains. “Don’t know what kinda stick that trumpeter's got up his arse but he’d be doing us all a good favour if he took it out and threw it far, far-.”

“Steven,” your voice isn’t harsh, a gentle callback to the moment between you two that existed free of any trumpets. “I’m alright now,” you cup his cheek, gaze into the coffee cups of his eyes. He’s more concerned than you initially took it for, his light-hearted teasing a paper-thin veil. “Just needed a breather.”

“You sure you don’t wanna go? It’ll be much nicer at home, Gus’ll be there n’all.”

Steven loves live music, despite his complaints. He’s notorious for being the life of the dance floor whenever you two go out, and his eyes are still twinkling, the need to dance still present in his soul like a blossoming tulip.

“I'm never more at peace than when I’m in your arms…when I’m with you,” you smile, trace the ridges and grooves of his nose, press your thumb into the prominent pockmark on his left cheek, right above his mouth. “Thanks for coming and finding me.”

“‘Course honey, ‘course,” he swallows, tightens his grip on you a little. “You really wanna stay?”

You nod, “I think I’ve got an hour or two left in me.”

He doesn’t stray from your side once after that, sweat dampening his forehead as he spins and spins to the music he seemingly hated. In something beyond your soul, his presence is steady and quiet like a rusted anchor.

Steven’s hand is warm and soothing in yours, his voice hoarse and scratched an hour later, after you’ve said your goodbyes and are heading out.

Your feet ache a little. For some reason, the nails of your hands are throbbing. Your soul is calm, soothed.

As always, all you really needed was Steven.

And Steven always came to you.

Thanks for reading, if you liked it, please consider leaving some feedback! I don't usually respond, but I obsess and re-read reblogs and comments constantly.

Masterlist here, requests here.

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thegeminisage · 1 month

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what's more funny than chocolate getting vulcans smashed is that if vulcans DIDN'T KNOW chocolate would get them smashed until they went to earth and ate some. like, because nobody post-reform had ever bothered to make anything with the intent of being intoxicating because that's, you know, illogical. maybe they didn't even know they could GET smashed. then like 6 months after first contact some uptight vulcan ambassador gets wine drunk at a policy meeting. this absolutely improves human/vulcan relations by the way

#personal #star trek blogging #is this worth tagging as meta...sure #liz makes stuff #liz's star trek stuff #liz writes meta #anyway cue humans trying to ply vulcans with everything from sparkling water to catnip tea to see what they'll do next #they have to bring in one of those bad bitches who finished kohlinahr to try it all because everyone else is too scared to get stoned

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agentark · 1 year

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whatever you do, don't imagine a young J Corvin waiting every day at the end of their drive, hoping today is the day the mail carrier finally brings a letter from their very best friend

#i'm personally about to start sobbing #how many letters do they try sending #how long does that sweet gentle soul wait - I actually don't want to know #little too close to home frankly lmao #grandpa i don't CARE that something evil lives in fernweh and wants to eat me or control me or whatever - that's my bestie!!#I just did James's route and this part hurt so much worse #fernweh saga #like J is SO scared to ask MC if they can write this time & they're trying to be SO supportive--#--of the fact that the last time they tried MC was going through an incredibly difficult time in their life #but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt so badly #and like it's obviously not MC's fault bc they never even got the letters in the first place #but now I want to cry thinking about how my MC hugs James at the police station when they meet again and how he's probably like ???#my MC missed him and James is like 'weird reaction for someone who couldn't be bothered to write back'#'and shattered my little fifteen year old heart into pieces'#i'm making wild assumptions about the inner workings of J's mind here but anyway #j corvin #all i'm saying is if my best friend was ripped out of my life and I tried writing them I would be religiously checking the mailbox #probably far longer than I should but still trying to hold out hope

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radaverse · 29 days

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Do you ever feel EXTREMELY self conscious about your own work or something 💀

artist moment

#legit happened to me several times about ToM #I'm just there then I'm like “WHAT IF THIS IS TOO MUCH?!?! WHAT IF I'M WRITING IT WRONG?!?!”#I guess I have a kind of “trauma” regarding writing badly 💀#when I was a child my writing was absolutely garbage and now I'm scared of writing badly again 😭⚰️#MAN I'M JUST THERE TRYING TO SLEEP BUT MY BRAIN COMES LIKE “rad what if tom is too much angst” AND I'M LIKE 👀#the fear #tower of mistakes #radaverse #I'll also post silly thoughts often to not make this tumblr go so silent when I'm still cooking

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ninja-knox-ur-sox-off · 2 years

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Okay, but. SWK Truth serum au. Imagine him being forced to communicate. Comedy, hurt/comfort, and finally clearing up, well, everything. I’m not sure where I’m going with this, sorry. Have a great day, bye!

“You know who broke the toaster, Monkey?” The word “yes,” was pulled out feeling forced and unpleasant. Pigsy looked like he already knew the answer before he asked. Wukong wasn’t sure why he bothered asking at all. “Who?” “I did.” “Of course…” Pigsy pinched the bridge of his snout and sighed before looking at him, brows furrowed with some familiar annoyance that made Wukong’s hands twitch. “Mystic Monkey strength and all that I bet.” Not a question so Wukong just gave him a forced smile instead of answering. He glanced away to look over at where Mei and Mk were arguing over whether it was sane to put butter on plain bread without toasting it first. “Nothing to say for yourself?” Pigsy asked after a long moment of silence. “No,” the words slid out, unraveling, too many. It made him lightheaded the more he said, not unlike the feeling that came with blood loss. Dizzying and empty. Every word took something with it as it left him. “It never matters what I say.”

Anon you have no idea how desperately I want to write an entire fic about this, I have been thinking about this constantly since you sent this ask bKL;SDMAFAOWEF

#knox rambles #KNOX WRITES (me)#Monkie Kid #LEGO Monkie Kid #i KNOW YOU LITERALLY SAID COMEDY BUT I'D VEER SO HARD INTO ANGST YOU HAVE NO IDEA BGLKAMOWEFMSD #watch the crew realize exactly how messed up Wukong's belief system is #watch one of them ask 'you don't really believe that right?' and then realize that he believes it as truth and fact because he can't lie #so he's telling them what he believes is the truth #watch them be horrified #watch Wukong hate how they look at him #watch how he sways on his feet when they ask too many questions because the serums pulling stuff from him he doesn't want out #watch him resign himself to their anger because he can't deflect with jokes or lightheartedness when it won't let him say anything but the #truth when they ask him a question #I'M GOING FERAL I TELL YOU #YELLS #Monkey King | Sun Wukong #WATCH LITTLE THINGS TRIGGER HIM LIKE BROKEN TOASTERS AND LIGHT SCOLDINGS AND HAVE NO WAY TO HIDE THAT IT HURTS HIM #WATCH HIM RUN OFF ON HIS OWN TO TRY AND FIX IT BECAUSE IT SCARES HIM #GODS I'M FINE #I WANT TO MAKE THIS INTO A FIC SO BAD I'M SCREAMING #HGHSDFBSDF;AGB;OAIFMFKKSDF #Asks #anon #THIS IS SO LATE BECAUSE I SO DESPERATELY WANTED TO WRITE SOMETING FOR IT #THIS WAS ALL I HAD BRAINPOWER FOR I WISH I COULD WRITE MORE

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dollsome-does-tumblr · 5 months

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so, the most recent novel i managed to actually finish writing, three long years ago, was the book of my absolute lifelong dreams and most of the time i just leave it sitting on my computer and pretend it doesn't exist because i feel too tenderly about it and i'm too proud of it and it's agony to me. these feelings are, for whatever reason, unbearable hell. but like once a year i work up the courage to reread it, and every time i'm like, "god DAMN! who wrote this?? this is exactly what i've wanted to read my whole life!!!!!!! it's simply delightful!" and then i remember that oh yeah, it's me!

#i feel like i should vow to try to query this thing like 50 times just because i love it so much and i owe it to my own love of it #and then when i get rejected because it's 155k and that's insane (but it NEEDS TO BE!) i can at least say i tried #i don't get what it says about me that i wrote the book of my dreams and now i'm too embarrassed so i pretend it doesn't exist #instead of trying to get it published #as it is apparently my lifelong goal to be a published novelist #why is my brain wired this way!??!?!?!?!#i think i'm just too scared that everyone else will hate it and it will hurt my feelings too much because it's so me #it is truly and completely my sweet little baby #and it has the same word count as jane austen's emma which i only discovered after i finished writing it #fate!!!!!!!#dollsome's deep thoughts #it's my birthday so i'm allowing myself this really self-indulgent post #getting older and still never being a (non-self-) published novelist: the story of me

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puppyeared · 8 months

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#UAUHGG im havung oc thoughts. plaguing myBRAIN. i can feel my heartrate spiking holy shit #ok so. i rly wanna touch up presto and shuffles story without scaring myself out of it by overthinking it. esp the implications of #them having animal features and what they would eat. as well as worldbuilding character dynamics setting background characters ugghh.#constantly have to tell myself its just for fun. basically theyre rival magicians who keep their identities secret and fuck it up in #the funniest way possible LMAO. they rent the same apartment and the landlady accidentally gives it to both of them without them knowing #so they end up walking in on each other out of costume and have this weird tension around not revealing each others identities despite thei #borderline malicious rivalry. blackmail may or may not be involved i havent decided yet #they DO consider backing out of tenancy but they decide not to so they can make sure they dont reveal each others identities #thats the idea but its really abstract bc i dont have a direction or writing in mind. they just rattle in my head like spare change #other stuff i have rn is. they both consider each other a copycat and they have the same skill level of magic #but they have different styles and techniques theyre just too focused on outperforming each other to notice #presto likes to make people laugh so they probably include gags and impossible feats. shuffle is more elegant and focuses on #smooth movements and dangerous stunts. i want to make that reflect in their costumes but its hard bc stage magician costumes tend to stick #to suits and capes.. so idk. then maybe side characters like the landlady and other tenants but i havent given em much thought orz #i really should practice with concepts because i have a bad habit of making everything similar to the first try so its frustrating #and i suck at writing characters. but im doing this for fun so im trying not to get hung up on whether its generic or not #yapping #stares at the floor. maybe i should make a carrd for my ocs #oc talk #presto #shuffle

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sesamenom · 7 months

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Maglor Variations for the maglorath

normal outfit minus coat traditional Maglor Palette

pre-exile feanorian colors black & grey version

normal outfit minus coat plus glasses goth version plus glasses

#silm #silmarillion #maglor #maglorath #<- aka the dagor dagorath era of the maglor through history au #seventh age stuff #trying out stuff to see how i want to picture him when i write this #the glasses are for hiding his Elf Eyes when hes out in public #the hair can usually be passed off as dyed and his ears arent particularly noticeable but his eyes tend to scare people #the traditional palette looks rly cool on him #i think the black/grey version would be pretty cool too if it didnt look like a waiter uniform #red/yellow feanorian palette doesnt really seem to work w modern clothes #looks too circusy #maybe the dark red/black/gold exile palette would work better #goth + glasses version looks like a spy

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remynisce · 11 months

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Been working on characters recently

#artists on tumblr #character design #ocs #my ocs #rem ocs #rem draws #they all have names but I couldn’t find a way to like write them down on their respective pieces #without making the composition look too cluttered or whatever #so if you’re really interested in learning their names send me an ask lmao #these are all part of a project I’m working on :) and by working on I mean still thinking about #I came up with the idea like a week ago and have just been designing characters for it since #very excited about it #also trying to become less scared of posting my ocs on social media. if anything it means more people can learn about them hopefully

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kleinstar · 3 months

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[ FAKE ]

✧ — ⋆ 𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒! (ACCEPTING)

for your muse to pretend to know my muse in public to save them from a difficult encounter

Eiden's running out of focus. He's been sketching for quite long now and his pen is beginning to drift off it's lines. Like that Eiden's eyes too wander about until they stop to witness a scene. Few more seconds and the pink hair rings a bell. The....dude! Nezha! The one delinquent looking dude that knew Sun. It looks like he's in some kind of trouble.

The idea might be a dumb one. The guy doesn't NEED help, probably and he'll let him know afterwards too, Eiden's pretty certain about that However, by heart he's a meddler - a peaceloving at that - and can't help himself.

And so ... he packs his sketch book and approaches the group - or rather dashes to Nezha.

" DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE! " he yells as he claps excitedly.

" My guy!!! Pete! Your birthday!! I'm soooooo sorry! I forgot about it.... It was like yesterdayy riiiiight? Happy birthday dude! I don't have a gift on me now but..."

He slings his hand over newly christened Li 'Pete' Nezha's shoulder. Maybe there's no point in giving such a recognizable guy alias sometimes you just have to be certain.

" What d'ya say we get a rum cake? Or maybe just rum! "

He turns to engage with the audience.

" Ya want to join? " Eiden happily asks. They're looking awfully confused if anything. Eiden takes this chance and starts slowly retreating:

" No? " he then chirps patting one of their cheeks to add into the confusion, " too bad handsome. I think we could have gotten along..."

He tugs Nezha's sleeve - it's a cue to leave. Pretty fast too. Rest is running - at some point they manage to get them off their tail though.

" I could have dealt that myself. "

There's that line. Good thing he'd fully expected so he's got a perfect follow up!

" Listen now, there's no need to get violent to every single little guy out there?

" Never mind that now, let's get drinks for real! Or maybe you want ramen again? I'll pay ok? "

#ringlorn #meems //#I THINK this is supposed to be the other way around but this was my first thought so #was very tempted by some sleazy gross guy trying to hit on eiden and nezha appearing to help......#but i feel like he would just scare the guy off than bother pretending anything lmao?#maybe im wrong anyway i also wanted to write eiden go 'hey hes a birthday boy'#this got too long

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