#anyway so this (just like idk every other drawing i make) became a lot more work than orginally intended but its ok

[mrghostrat]

i appreciate all the kindness for my uni rejection, and anyone going through the same thing should def read through my replies if they need similar comfort. there’s a lot of “ATAR isn’t everything!” comments tho, which made me realise i haven’t actually talked much about my goals, so i wanted to share a little context.

i’m 30 (on the 17th). i took a gap year after high school and i went to uni at 19. i even dropped out a semester before graduating to pursue the one thing that was making me happy (my first original comic) during a really bad depression (undiagnosed adhd burnout). i got the last units and graduated a year later, a bachelor of game design.

haven’t used my degree once. i went into comics and freelance rather than games. but i also loved that degree and would do it all again, it was absolutely worth it.

i’ve been freelance and self sufficient for 6-7 years, and it’s fun and i’m proud of the things i’ve made, but i’m so tired. i’m specifically tired of having to work 7 different angles to make up one sufficient salary, and even if it ends up being temporary, i’d give anything for a 9-5. have someone else in charge for once.

got to the end of my rope last year and sat down to figure out what i like and what i’m good at. a Life Plan, yknow. i’ve always had an interest in teaching, helping, connecting like that. figured out degrees and became really invested in this new trajectory i pictured my life going on. i was also tired of waiting, because every time i wanted to move back to the city from this tiny town we’re in, somethings come up or delayed it. so zita helped me figure out how we could get the ball rolling and break our lease 3 months early, so we could move back to melbourne and i could start my degree this year. we looked for (and found) an apartment specifically on the side of the city that would be closest to my campus.

i hope that gives a lil context as to why i’m so devastated right now. the last 5 months have been me revving up to start this new chapter at the end of feb and one little email said nah.

the degree i wanted to do was a double degree, secondary education (hons) and a BA of fine arts. i was equally excited for both, because i never got to do a lot of actual art learning in my last degree, and the BA would give me all of that— life drawing, sculpting, painting, wood/metal/jewellery working, digital, fuckin everything. but it was the less important of the pair, when it comes to getting myself a job as an art teacher, because i already have the art experience. it was just a fun bonus, and the education degree was the one i NEEDED.

in nov i had to travel to melbourne to present a portfolio and interview for the BA. they showed me around the studio too, and i fell a little bit in love. i got the acceptance email in december, but i still didn’t have an offer for the education degree. another reason why i’m so discombobulated— i technically have an invitation, but it’s for the less important degree that would just be a money sink. do i go to uni anyway?? or just ignore this invitation and move on?

my state recently made education/teaching degrees free as a way of encouraging more teacher jobs. i learnt about this after i decided i wanted to pursue teaching, so it was just a fun lil bonus that i wouldn’t be adding to my student debt. apparently not, bc i didn’t think about how every teenager and their dog would apply for teaching degrees so they could get straight into uni without any debt. so, even tho i’m a graduate and i’m not relying on school scores, i was one in a million, likely just numbers on a page, and didn’t get in.

there could be other paths. i could start the BA and add the Edu degree later? i could reapply for mid year intake. i could… idk, most of what i could do requires emailing Monash and asking wtf, because i have no idea what’s actually possible and will need someone to lay it out for me.

still feels like i’ve run into a brick wall though. little bit shut down. more sad, not quite angry, but suddenly really spiteful for some reason— like “oh, you don’t want me? okay fuck you then, i won’t ever teach.” so stupid. just a bit fragile rn

#ghost scribbles

[camilaxmartin]

gonna put them emoji’s again💀😭 so it would be: 🥑🍬🌸🐝🎨🍄

I love using these TOTALLY USEFUL emoji’s so I picked em🥰

you don’t use avocado/bee/mushroom everyday? what are you even doing?🙄

BUT ANYWAY

🥑: you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

probably @bunnylove1 and @blookyag, idk why tho honestly, just getting the vibes they’d help somebody out with hiding the body💀 (it’s a compliment, i swear-)

🍬: post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character:

okay uhh- (don’t cancel me plz) i respect with my whole heart that alastor is asexual and (?) aromantic but i don’t get the hate people receive when shipping him with someone? as far as i know being on the spectrum means he can still date? like i know, he doesn’t show any interest in that but if its just for a silly au or for a cool drawing then what’s the fuss about? i’m not talking like about erasing that part of him because that’s a big no no for me, but like…? respecting it but still having fun with his character? i saw a great tiktok explaining my thoughts exactly so maybe i’ll link it here if i can find it (add the link here later camila:) (besides all that i project a lot of myself onto alastor (still debating if im aromantic or not) and i want to explore myself with his character (if i can even phrase it that way) so all the hate and shit really bother me, you know?)

(another thing more about whole thing not a character is that “whatever it takes” is in my top 4 songs and i don’t get the hate it gets?? i love this song?? it’s so great?? two latina (?) girls singing together?? cmon??)

🌸: do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them:

i do actually! i have a dog and three rats:) (also had a rabbit but he died not so long ago and he was like my whole world so i got a tattoo to remember him, i’ll add it as well just because i can)

🐝: tag your biggest supporters and say one nice thing about them:

@kimmyisachiisaiakuma - ugh of course?? like in my head we are already besties fr fr, what can i saaaay😭 idk i love you and how supportive and just friendly you are!!:) and god of course, i love your art?? but i’ve already said it a thousand times??? so here’s one thousand first??

@bunnylove1 - just how supportive you are towards my stuff and how with exactly one request i felt like we also became besties? maybe it’s just me but yeah😭

@blookyag - liking my every post and responding to every single one of them!!! she’s a treasure, really. i’m surprised someone cares about my rambling this much💀

@informist - i’ve noticed that she’s also reacting to a lot of my stuff and she’s so quick with it like?? idk it makes my heart jump okay? i love attention from people even when it’s just my stupid rambling😭 (#iamanattentionwhore 😗😗)

@rougecreator1 - liked a lot of my posts as well, and somehow i feel like they enjoy my stuff? idk tho?😭😭 yeah just noticed interactions in my activities:)

@riveramorylunar - i feel like we were more active on each other’s accounts when i was still in my lady lesso era, but idk i really liked you then and i still love seeing your stuff pop up on my main page:)

and of course, all of my lovely anons who send me their ideas that i can’t wait to write!!:)

🎨: link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it:

okay so like it changes every day?? but for now i must say this one:

click!

why? simple. a. brokerdoll b. the marvellous style? c. i want to draw like that d. just… just look at it okay? e. lesbians.

(and a special mention for THIS as well, as it’s the first time someone ever drawn my oc and besides the fact that she looks so pretty here it’s just… idk i just love it okay, she stole my heart)

🍄: share a headcanon for one of your favourite ships or pairings:

let’s start with the fact that i even have a favourite account for all the headcanons about brokerdoll which is @vypridae (adore all the hcs, really)

buut! my personal headcanon is:

• carmilla didn’t really expect to fall for velvette, i mean in my head she just saw her as so… respectless and dumb and stupid and careless and carefree and wild and free and pretty- wait

yeah, so in my head velvette was the first to initiate anything and at first carmilla was like “ha! no way, you stupid girl” but then she started to think more and more about velvette as the time went on and one day she just got along the fact that she might be attracted to the young overlord and somehow… went with it? like she didn’t make a big deal out of it… but velvette definitely did, despite the fact she was actually the first one to say or act on her attraction in any way.

(i need to write more headcanons for them, they’re literally eating up my brain)

#camilarambles #ask camila! #camilaanswersasks #brokerdoll

[clambuoyance]

ngl I know nothing ab your DC blorbos except they're gay and cool or something Idk I just think they're neat... I'd ask what comics I could read ab them being super blorbo-y but Idk...

OKAY so there’s a lot of characters in dc but the ones I draw/talk about the most are these group of friends!! They feature in Young Justice 1998, Teen Titans 2003, and Young Justice 2019, as well as having their own comics and other appearances :)

each comic run has different vibes but my personal favorite is yj1998 bc I like its wacky and zany vibes. It was not my first comic though, and it’s a little older so it might be hard to understand or read if it’s your first time reading comics like this, and again it is old soooo some stuff does Not age well such as certain jokes or depictions and it is of course not all perfect but overall I love it and think it has a lot of heart

I think i have a lot of fun with it bc it feels so…animated? And it has funny slapstick humor. Honestly I probably like it bc it makes me laugh the same way ninjago makes me laugh…a group of 4+ friends that have cute dynamics with each other and just Being Silly Together. I really don’t know how to explain it but between all three runs, I can see yj1998 in my head the most as a wacky animated show with exaggerated bouncy animation idk so that’s part of the fun for me. I think the moment I realized this was going to be a long term emotional investment was When I read the issue where they randomly end up on a planet and have to play baseball bc I am a SUCKERRR for baseball shenanigans

But yeah the group starts out with Bart, Tim, and Kon in JLA: A world without Grownups, and they just have a good trio dynamic 🙏 the banter between all three is so good 🤩and I liked seeing their friendship develop throughout yj1998 too! Especially for Tim, with his hesitancy at the beginning.They weren’t without conflict ofc but that adds to why I like them bc eventually they became besties for life. They are also quickly joined by others but the main one that stays w the group through all three runs is Cassie Sandsmark , aka Wonder Girl ii.

But yeah I guess some things I like are the way they actually Hang out? like they will do camping trips or go to the mall and games together etc etc, but there will be parts that feel more serious while never losing that humorous tint to it. For some examples, I love how Tim tries to be a leader in the beginning, but then one arc shows just how much Cassie is more fitting for it, and how they bond over Leader things like how hard it is to tell Bart what to do and then will share a really nice hug 🥺, and I love Cassie and Cissie’s relationship a LOT because they sometimes misunderstand each other but clearly care for each other (they aren’t canon but in my heart they are.) I also like Tim and kon’s build towards understanding and friendship for a similar reason, and cissie and Anita also have a nice development with each other, but yeah all the dynamics are just fun to think about tbh 🤷🏻‍♀️ I am pointing at them eagerly and going “wow! Friendship!!”

And as for the guy I never shut up about…well that’s a whole thing I could ramble about but i became obsessed with him the moment he quoted Peter Pan while lamenting about how he was afraid his friends would leave him behind after several issues of him acting like Hot Shit and erm I’m predictable so it got to me 🙄 also he makes dumb jokes every second like he expects someone to laugh at them like he’s so dumb sometimes….anyways I do not want to ramble too much so I will get on with it

I was only familiar with his black tshirt look before, so when I first saw this goofy looking dumbass with a leather jacket and glasses and an earring I WAS LIKE “THATS SUPERBOY? THATS REAL?” and quickly became interested in the notion of a Superman associated hero wearing something like this bc I don’t think my brain ever considered the possibility before….also it is something I cannot explain some panels just activate my cuteness aggression 😔 I just think he’s really cute 🫶🫶🫶

#sorry for rambling and in a totally not concise way #dc #clam answers #young just us

[fizzingwizard]

Time for some semi-ritual bitching about one of my favorite bitch-worthy topics, Yugioh

Why couldn't they have just done Memory World properly

Why make us suffer through Doma... and especially KC Grand Prix, a single episode of which is more boring than filler in any other fandom... and they made an entire filler arc out of it! Like Doma has lots of faults but at least it tried to do something interesting. It tried to develop characters, which proooobably shouldn't have been undertaken by a filler arc with no canon script to follow, but gold star for trying! Had a shitty finale not remotely worthy of its awesome beginning, but did we really expect any better? lol. KC Grand Prix tho, no. That's just there to Idk be mean to men with pink hair and dumb names?? In the ridiculous hair dumb names anime???

cut because Fizz has the curse of long-windedness thanks my evil fairy godmother

anyway back to Memory World, maybe the issue was the story in the manga still lagged behind where the anime was. I don't remember. If so I guess there was no choice but filler. Still, did they have to blow the budget on it? They lost most of their good animators during Doma, where they also introduced a couple new crap ones who stuck around till the end of course -___- And no doubt the animators were getting paid peanuts for long hours of work, and if they'd run out of budget to even pay that... well clearly the show should have been shorter. Like two whole filler arcs shorter. Just take a break, take a pause, come back when you're ready to do Memory World the way it should be done. Back then no one took breaks, "The fans will forget us," nowadays TV shows just up and away for multiple years at a time x'D before returning suddenly with a new season.

The reason I'm still salty and plan to be salty to my grave is just this. Memory World is the one and only YGO arc since season zero that was not explicitly about card games. They'd been dropping hints since the first that we could expect ancient Egypytian shenanigans in the finale. We were supposed to find out about Atem's lost memories and recover his name. That was the driving force behind everything that wasn't filler. I specifically became a fan as a kid because I enjoyed reading about Ancient Egypt and thought the idea of a millennia-old feud between a pharaoh and whoever Bakura really was sounded neat. So I watched hours and hours and hours of card games all for the sake of making it to Ancient Egypt.

(don't get me wrong I enjoyed the card games lol. Never ask a YGO fan to explain how watching characters stand around and yell "Pot of Greed allows me to draw two cards from my deck!" for hundreds of episodes somehow stayed fresh and interesting)

So we reach Memory World at loooooooong last and. And the animation is the worst. Atem falls off a cliff it's just like "ow." Bakura isn't have as intriguing anymore now that he's a poorly drawn anime guy with scars. He arrives toting Atem's father's mummy it should be scary. It should be shocking. But instead, for some reason we watched dancing girls of questionable historical accuracy repeat the same frame several times, while Atem makes a face like a baby trying his hardest to go number two in his diaper. In the manga this scene is really funny, with Siamun being Sugoroku in every way, and Atem in his awkwardness being more Yugi-like than we've ever seen him. In the anime they are just going through the motions. There's no life in anything.

The one thing the anime version got right was understanding that this was the one and only opportunity we'd have to learn about Atem. You know, half of the main character for the whole show. Even the manga is really so busy doing plot stuff it kind of forgets to make us care about the ancient Egyptian cast. The anime took advantage of the need for pacing to give us a couple low key moments about Atem & Friends, but for some reason it decided we should 1) know what Atem looked like falling flat on his nose as a toddler, and 2) show us that from a young age he was making grand progressive speeches about equality. Seeing Atem portrayed as a nice guy who cared about people gave me mixed emotions after watching him struggle for seasons with the possibility that he might have been a bad king and not remember it. Because we got a whole season of him making mistakes and disappointing fans in Doma, and now in Memory World the final answer to what kind of person Atem was is just "well he's a good guy in the modern sense of the word lol" and then we move on. Also, neither that speech, nor Doma, are manga canon, but fans on the whole remember Doma much better than they remember nice guy baby Atem. Which is so very nice -.-;

So Memory World could have been so much fun, exciting, adventurous in a way you can't always be when you have to stay put on a holo-duel stage (card games on motorcycles hasn't been invented yet!), and insightful about a character who has been the central point of everything yet whom we knew next to nothing about. Instead it was a poorly animated clusterfuck of battle scenes that were difficult to make sense of. The Bakura stuff was the best. The Kaiba-insert filler was the worst. I was disappointed with Set's arc in the manga as well, another thing that had been built up for years and years and ended up more about the mysterious waif-like dragon girl than Set vs Atem. If the anime changed something to add in Kaiba, I wish they'd have rewritten the Set vs Atem duel so it was mildly interesting, and Idk maybe Kaiba could have teamed up with Atem against his past self, which would have aggravated him to no end? Instead of just wandering around insisting none of this could really be happening. Or he should just not have been there at all. Personally I go the DSOD route and pretend Kaiba was never in Memory World, same as the manga. It's not like erasing him from the anime version has any impact on events bahahaha. He was included for MONEY MONEY MONEY popular character NEEDS to stick around even if he has abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do because MONEY MONEY MONEY

I love DSOD to pieces. But my own dream for the anniversary project was a remake of Memory World. Even if it had been a 90 min movie version instead of several episodes, as long as it was better quality, and invested in Atem as a character instead of simply as a pawn in a game, I would have enjoyed those 90 mins better than the entire Memory World season. Doma and KC Grand Prix were a mistake if they played a role in how awful Memory World was.

But they did the Millennium Duel well. Not astonishing, but really, except for useless Kaiba being there, it was more than adequate. (And although Kaiba himsefl was useless, it was cool seeing him rejected as an opponent for Atem in favor of Yugi. Actually I kinda wish they'd made a bigger deal out of that...) Kid me cried buckets (actually I must have been well into my teens by then bahahaha. I def cried though). Thanks to those final two episodes, the series send-off didn't leave me with a bad taste in my mouth. If it had ended with Memory World it would have been an even bigger disappointment to me than the finale of Bleach. And I despise the finale of Bleach x'D

#yugioh #youre never too old to be salty about cartoons amirite little kuriboh

[astarionz]

4 and 10 for ambrose 15 for immren + a and g (about both of them) for yewwww

How easy is it to earn their trust?

not easy at all. he's extremely paranoid, but he's very easy to talk to and work with despite that. like he doesn't Seem that he's always on edge, but he is. even more so after he becomes prince, because he has a different mindset about the camarilla and anarchs compared to the primogen, who REALLY don't like him, but appointed him as prince since he's naive and easy to control. then they send him across the country once he starts rebelling and being difficult.

the only one person he genuinely trusts is iver. that's why he offered the mutual blood bond lol. and then they divorce every other week. sorry this is unrelated . there's lucien also but they grew apart once ambrose became "more important."

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?

ambrose lies so much. even when he's telling the truth, he will usually keep the parts of it to himself if it means getting things to work in his favor. that sort of thing, if that makes sense ?

there are lies he's told that DO actually haunt him. idk if you remember, but that comic i drew of him and his brother, gabriel. like ambrose's sire wiped gabe's memory of him. ambrose meets him again years later and catches gabe's attention bc hes just Staring. so he has to act like he doesn't know him. that hurt him a lot. (brief ambrose lore, his parents died before he was turned, and gabe is his only remaining family member. who's basically dead to him now since andrew mindwiped him and forbids ambrose from speaking to him ever again.)

How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

for immren's voice claim, i'm really drawn to jamie bower I think. [Im really sorry for the strangers thing clip, i don't see immren having a british accent 😭] but the way jamie speaks here is really really accurate to how i imagine immren's cadence though. also since his voice also isn't as deep as the voice i used in bg3 (i still love you Voice 3 ).

immren is soft spoken in a normal conversation, almost whispering half the time. every word he says, it's like he says it with purpose. he speaks so eloquently in a way that makes most people Want to listen to him. super easy for him to be manipulative. Looks at his in-game charisma stat.....

also he NEVER uses fillers during his sentences like "um" "uh" "er" etc etc, if that makes sense. though i guess that goes along with "every word he says is said with purpose." lol.. he rarely rehearses because he doesn't need to. he will stay silent if he absolutely needs to think over a response to something. (ex. Gortash asking him to come with him to steal the crown of karsus from mephistopheles, and immren just staring at him for a good twenty seconds before verbally replying.)

he does struggle to speak with emotion, and if he tries, it sounds forced and unnatural. the characters that get to know him on a more personal level can understand his genuine feelings since he's so Direct anyways.

SORRY . I REALLY RAMBLED i hope this makes sense

Why are you excited about this character?

ambrose has a lot of fun connections in his world i love thinking about and would like to eventually draw more interactions of! iver, lucien, his sire, the random human men he won't ghoul but plays with their lives anyways, his former coterie, his new coterie. he's also a fashion model so that gives me an excuse to dress him up like a barbie with fun clothes i find on pinterest. Also vtm in general makes me excited and happy, and not to be biased but i really like my dumbass ventrue lol

immren has a lot of interesting traits to him i like to talk about! not only does he experience the horrors of being a bhaalspawn, he also has that cosmic horror aspect about him too with his eldritch patron. im excited to draw more horror related things with him if im ever feeling brave enough, there are some painting ideas i do have in mind already. there are also things in bg3 i haven't really touched on yet with art so im excited to get around to those too with him

What trait of theirs bothers you the most?

ambrose is really difficult for me to characterize a lot of the time. he's a hypocrite. he's kind. he's twisted. he wants to protect humans yet plays with their lives like they're his toys. he's manipulative. he seeks out the best for his coterie members. im afraid he reads off as inconsistent but maybe that's his charm? 😭

immren is supposed to be a really evil and dark character but sometimes i feel like im woobifying on accident. . does this count . LMFAOO

#ask #oc: ambrose #oc: immren #THANKuu i wrote so many words oops #Guys if theres another spot i forgot to finish a sentence at . . well..

[lycocarpum]

I took a nap and woke up thinking about metacontext and lovecraft

Smarter men (gender neutral) than I have written oodles of academic papers about the intersectionality of horror and marginalized groups, particularly tying together queerness or some defining otherness with depictions of the monstrous; lovecraft himself used this allegory in it's most literal and harmful iteration, that the "other" was meant to be feared simply for its strangeness.

But as audiences of "othered" individuals found and read these works, the familiarity with and sympathy for the monster became to define the genre. And this happened well before his time- what is Frankenstein if not a deconstruction of what makes something "monstrous"? Notre-Dame de Paris, for all the it was about the building more than it's inhabitants, asks similar questions of us; and so, too, do retold and reimagined stories within lovecraft's mythos.

To examine what is monsterous, and to whom it is repulsive, is to fundamentally deconstruct the racist backbone of lovecraft's work. To ask why these features were chosen to depict this creature, to question the narrator on their descriptive choices, to look at the extraordinary diverse death-cult hanging out in Boston and ask "wait a second, why Are so many people involved in this? And what do they really believe?" is all in service of engaging with broader narratives surrounding race, sexuality, gender, and so on. And to not ask those questions of the source material is also invoking a perspective; that of unquestioning conformance, an ignorance at best and outright compliance with the source material's inherent bigotry at worst.

Does that mean that the death-cults HAVE to be in the right? That the monsters HAVE to be sympathetic? Of course not. But asking why those cults exist, who benefits from their conception and how, or to ask what your monster is meant to be allegorical to is pretty fundamental writing just off the bat.

And I guess all of this is dancing around the question I really want to pose other writers: if you're not using lovecraft's work to engage with these broader ideas, why are you using it at all? What draws you to this world, why is it compelling to you? Not every story has to tackle issues of race, sexuality, etc, but in a genre so mired by its bigotry, it begs the question of what you, as an author, are choosing to steer the narrative towards or away from.

Anyway I feel like the rights to Cthulhu should belong to gay people. :'D and Hbomberguy has a really good video on lovecraft's work wrt queerness that you guys should check out if you've never seen it, it's pretty old but it gets to the core of this a lot better than I could, and he cites real academics by name so go read those papers, idk.

#no one take this super seriously im sleep deprived #but really ive run CoC for AGES now and GMs fall into two catagories: ones who get this shit and ones who dont

[heraldofcrow]

ALSO I think I've developed a disease where I can't simp for another idiot long enough and then end up switching on a person he wronged somehow (directly or not) ;-; Like I started out as Seluvis simp but moved onto Sellen soon enough, then I started liking Petrus (shut up you are nobody to judge ME!!!) but I move onto Reah at this point 💀💀💀 I think I am an idiot falling for the same trap of not being able to analyze a guy without analyzing all his relationship with other characters, including his incelmates, and that's how I discover that ACTUALLYYYY....... As someone who did NOT make Henriett your blorbo despite subscribing to the idea that Bloody Crow killed her, can you give me an advice how to stop this loop???? I want to simp for TERRIBLE and DISGUSTING MEN like the big girls ;-;

Oh my lord, no wait…I think I have the same problem expect in reverse???

Well, first off….my aroace ass does not “simp” in the way literally everyone means it, because there are rarely any genuine like…”crush” type feelings for The Blorbos, even if that was maybe…idk the initial leaning? But I am apparently one of God’s strongest soldiers because it’s very easy for me to look past just a character’s appearance eventually, no matter how objectively drop-dead gorgeous they are.

Like I draw Bloody Crow very pretty, but I feel nothing close to attraction when I look at him. I am sitting there like, “Look guys it’s the son boy” or some shit lmao, so I am WORTHLESS when it comes to the romantic feelings department. (Nobody believes this when I tell them though and I think that’s hilarious but anyway, MOVING ON).

I have the horrible habit of taking interest in the characters that “wrong” or “torment” my favs like 90% of the time. It depends on how it’s portrayed and said characters have to be well-written, and genuinely worthy rivals, but like…

Annalise and Logarius. Annalise was my girl first. I would gladly die for her. I wrote her an elaborate story. I feel very protective of her character…but um…somehow….Logarius became my fav when I started imagining him as Annalise’s obsessive, deranged political rival?

This happened in FF7 land too, which I won’t go into here because different fandom, but it was the same damn concept. Same with Arcane recently.

Somehow my blorbo’s rivals are also very appealing for me? Every single time? No matter how badly they mess with my fav right in front of my salad?

But I think it has to do with the writing, and mixed feelings absolutely have to be involved. The “rival” or “nemesis” character can’t be horrible for no reason or a cowardly backstabber. They have to be humanized and sympathetic to some degree, with perhaps some type of longing admiration or love for the other character mixed in, even if twisted. They have to equally stand out and be every bit as charismatic.

So, it’s different, but the psychology might be the same! You are drawn to the characters that are notoriously evil in that scheming, petulant sort of way and probably because they have a lot of humorous potential (you do like comedy after all and I am the tragedy junkie. Your fav villains are usually pretty funny and mine are tragic fallen angels). Your lads also tend to have perverse, deranged psyches and are full of nasty emotions. This shit is interesting, let’s not lie, and they are fun to psychoanalyze.

Their victims are usually sweet or well-meaning people who get royally screwed over, and the relationship between them and their tormentors is often fucked up or stricken with tension. Again, that’s all juicy stuff. The villain’s feelings towards their victims, the victim’s response, etc., all of this builds some fascinating relationships—and it’s absurdly difficult to not obsess over the various emotional connections your favorite villains have.

It’s how you learn more about them and the way they think, and you tend to grow to appreciate the other characters in the scenario just as much. This is fun and you shouldn’t stop! I do the same thing even if it’s in reverse!

Sometimes our villains favs are gateways to liking other characters.

#your blorbos and the victim blorbos are valid #we approach them differently but the concept is the same #it’s about the drama of the relationships #so like #enjoy it #have fun #it’s honestly pretty normal and you are “one of the big girls” lmao #there are variations #asks #mutuals #character analysis #fandom stuff

[elliespuns]

I've seen ppl answering these and I know you probaby don't do these but I thought I could at least try via ask. Anyway, you don't have to answer these if you don't want to. Love you dude, btw

• How old are you? • Tall or short? • Sexuality? • Describe yourself briefly • Something you like about yourself? • Favorite hobbies outside your blog? • Something no one would guess about you • Weird quirks you have • One talent you wished you had • A word your friends would use to describe you • Craziest thing that's ever happened to you • Have you ever been in love? • What is your biggest fear? • Why did you start this blog? • Your favorite food? • Least favorite food? • Favorite TV shows? • Favorite movie of all time? • Favorite musicians? • Do you have any pets?

I don't usually participate in these, but you being so nice and all... I can make an exception.

How old are you? I'm 30

Tall or short? Very short, I'm only 5'1 ft, 156 cm

Sexuality? Eh, I don't like labeling myself but if I had to, it'd say bisexual.

Describe yourself briefly I'm an introverted dork that doesn't vibe with most people. I dig music, art, and I love a lot. I either love too much or not at all. I've been vegan for over 10 years now and I love funny people. Other than that, I'm just a very poetic soul that also loves to play video games from time to time.

Something you like about yourself? I'd say it's my knowledge in English. I've been self 'learning' it for 9 years now (never been abroad) and I was able to learn the language to the point where it became a huge part of my life. Like I literally use it more than my mother language. That's a thing I definitely like about myself.

Favorite hobbies outside your blog? I write; creative writing, poetry. Both fulfil my creative mind. Then I love reading (ofc). I also draw, play video games, work with graphic programs and I love taking pictures.

Something no one would guess about you I have a very high sex drive, lmao 🫣😂 and people would never guess this about me, cause I literally look like I have a ribbon buckled to my vagina.

Weird quirks you have Oh, god, I can't stand hand cuts. Like you can literally show me a vid of someone having their throat slit and I'll be fine, but then you show me a vid of someone having their palm sliced, or simply just someone cutting their finger and I'll go all asdfghjklsdfghjk.

One talent you wished you had Damn, I wish I could draw from imagination. I can draw but I can't ever draw anything just by trying to see it in my head. That's so fucking frustrating. And weird. Anyone else having this problem?

A word your friends would use to describe you Idk about one word, but my best friend says I'm the funniest person she has ever met, so does that count? Lol, Idk why she says this.

Craziest thing that's ever happened to you Omg, trauma alert... when my boss (a male) caressed the top of my head.

Have you ever been in love? I still am.

What is your biggest fear? Fuck, it's hurricanes and tornados. I actually have a phobia, it's called 'ancraophobia' and it's a fear of strong wind. (I swear I don't fear normal wind tho, I'm not that weird, actually, ok?).

Why did you start this blog? When I came here one day I realized that there were only a few blogs that were dedicated to the game stuff. So I said why the hell not? I didn't expect to have an actual fanbase here, it's crazy. Love you guys.

Your favorite food? Lentils, that's the shit.

Least favorite food? I'd say meat.

Favorite TV shows? Okay, not gonna mention TLOU cause it's obvious, but the very first show that pops into my mind every time is Breaking Bad. I love this show to bits. Then I also love TWD, OITNB, Better Call Saul, Wentworth, This Is Us, Lost, The Killing.

Favorite movie of all time? My most favorite movie of all time will forever be Ginger Snaps (2000). I've loved this movie ever since I was 11. It's been 19 years ever since and I still love it to pieces. Aaaaah!

Favorite musicians? I love a lot of music, but my most favorite is Damien Rice. I love that guy and what he does. Right behind him are Cigarettes After Sex and Mazzy Star (just pure love). Then it would be Joshua Radin, The Hope Arsenal, Yaeow, The Paper Kites, The Smiths, R.E.M., Blur, BoDeans

Do you have any pets? My chonky boi guinea pig

#ok not related to tlou but why the hell not #the last of us #tlou #the last of us game #tlou game

[drinksglue]

hi i hope you don’t mind me coming into your inbox to rant. you just seem like the most reasonable person in the proship side of the TMC community.

anyway, i’ve been lurking in this community for a while (mostly because i’d rather not get involved in drama and just watch from afar) and overall i think the only issues i have with people in the proship side is how it’s mostly made up of minors and how they often treat crewdela more like fictional characters than the actual fictional characters themselves. you guys can ship mark and cesar all you want, why do you have to ship alex and andrew too?? ik RPF is a thing but i feel like theres a difference between shipping celebrities with each other and shipping some white boy who makes spooky videos with his best friend (maybe thats just me tho idk)

No, I pretty much agree.

To start, yeah, there's a huge issue with this side of the community being overrun by minors. To be honest, that's the case with the entire fandom, so it just sort of bleeds into every aspect of it. But the minors on our side of it can just be plain disrespectful.

Several have lied about their age to talk to me directly or even join my 18+ only discord server. A lot of them get really pissy when you point out that 18+ means 18+, and that someone under 18 doesn't belong in the 18+ side of the community.

I'm neutral on RPF, there are ways that people go about it that doesn't inherently bother me, but things that do bother me is when they start actually treating the crew like they are high-profile celebs, as you said. Someone drawing art of them is a little weird, I can't say I like it, but it's... whatever, I guess.

What does distress me though is the fact that now there are kids on Twitter posting photos of Alex and Andrew that they had to dig for because those pictures weren't meant to be spread publicly by randos on Twitter. It's super weird and invasive. They're literally just... guys. 19-year-old guys who became popular practically overnight. If you want to ship the characters or make smutty art/fic of those characters then by all means, but it would be nice if people would have some decorum when it comes to real people.

Hell, one of the minors who lied about their age to access adult accounts on Twitter is also responsible for a catastrophically shitty callout post on Alex that leaked tons of tweets from his private account that had nothing to do with the situation at hand, including several tweets where he is clearly struggling with his mental health. There is absolutely no reason why those tweets in particular needed to be exposed, and the only reason why you'd screenshot such a tweet is to use it to hurt someone.

To make a long fuckin story short: The TMC fandom is largely made up of minors, and regardless of whether they're on the proship side or the anti side, they've made a distasteful habit of being disrespectful little shits.

#mailbox #glue speaks #rant #discourse #inb4 I get called ageist #look I'm not saying I'm the most respectful person in the world #I have talked at length about how I'd smack Alex with a broom if given the chance #but let's draw the line in the sand somewhere

[wetbloodworm]

finally added details to the height chart for my DND PCs! this is actually relatively big so you can click to enlarge or open in another tab to view full size. here’s the original.

notes! under a cut because it became more than a few

putting details on this really put into perspective just how short niamh is. it’s different when it’s just the basic shapes but making them all actual people and. god. she’s a full foot shorter than zenith. compact!

toby’s not much better off considering how tall i remember neoma and jericho being

i sure like boots in my designs, huh. also fingerless gloves, i actually removed temerity’s here because i couldn’t have three of them in a row. i’m a coward.

syrus and niamh both have the useless belts, though niamh has more lol

chain mail is a fucking pain to draw and i didn’t do a great job here BUT i do like how it ends up looking when i do it right. i did remove it from temerity’s legs and gave him... pants? leggings? need to draw him again from a different angle to figure out what the look is. anyway i covered it up to spare myself some.

the only other time i’ve drawn toby’s armor, i did the pic in grayscale, and tbh i couldn’t figure out another color scheme. partly because now it’s just grayscale in my head. also i like to imagine the lightning on his armor actually lighting up the same blue as the gem (which is an artificer thing and not a feature of the armor as it was made) and i think that’d stand out better on the grayscale.

god syrus’ limbs are just so long

temerity’s face rarely comes out right imo, i’ve gotten him right like. twice maybe. but i think asya’s came out especially cute here!

the color variation here is decent, could use more brighter colors. toby would be more colorful in regular clothes but that’s not their default look so y’know.

four of the six have... partially closed eyes? heavy lidded eyes? idk how that actually translates, but i draw their upper eyelid more on them. i do that a lot in my designs, i just like the look! syrus’ eyes are downturned, asya’s are upturned. syrus and niamh both have the under-eye lashes emphasized more. every time i draw them i remember this one post saying it’s a slutty character design choice. let my kids live.

realizing my two autistic kids here have more neutral/flat default expressions. just how they be.

syrus and toby have my favorite outfits. the super deep V on syrus is fun, and i just love toby’s armor. WISH THEY STILL HAD IT BUT Y’KNOW!!!

i’m not good at symmetry and tend to draw at an angle so the hands don’t quite fall in the same place. one’s higher than the other or gets tucked more behind the leg or both. just something i noticed. need to work on that!

i don’t think they look TOO same-face-y, though that’s something i’ve struggled with. part of my problem again is that i just. can’t tell faces apart SUPER well. i know what shapes i’m going for when i draw a character and i can get the general idea down but i don’t always recreate them properly.

some of their heads are too big, or the proportions of their facial features are off. i can’t fully tell which is which. zenith and toby are the main culprits here.

this feels like a lot of nitpicking my art but the intent is still to discuss the designs as i’m doing so. i’m only partially going off-track.

part of me says i need to utilize patterns more in the clothes i draw, but that’s harder to recreate quickly. toby’s armor took me so long compared to everyone else. simple designs are easy to draw quick and less detailed, as my style often requires. but i like how toby looks here with the details in their armor! everyone else looks so plain next to them in comparison. i’ll think about it.

armor in general is hard for me, that’s why everyone typically dresses in regular clothes in my designs even if they wear armor in-game. i also don’t always look how armor looks so, y’know. clothes are more fun for me to draw.

i need to stop. we’re gonna stop now.

#art tag #reference tag #zenith tag #syrus tag #temerity tag #asya tag #toby tag #niamh tag #dnd tag #dnd ariknauts

[vonkarma2]

9 13 & 19?

9. What is one of your character's theme songs?

Very difficult to pick just one this is so much pressure. Does anyone have like only one song associated with them like a side character or something. Ok I couldn’t think of anything that wasn’t embarrassing so Im dodging the question. To make up for it here’s a playlist I made of ed ideas like if it was an anime these could be the ending song. Or an ending song if it was the same as like dorohedoro where they had a bunch of different ones 

13. Which OC do you make art/media with the most?

I think it’s actually Angel, like Rocio used to be the OC I drew by far the most but I actually think I draw Angel slightly more these days or at least like in terms of drawings that take more than 15 seconds. Probably bc there are more poses and outfits I can draw him in + expressions I can draw him with, whereas Rocio only does this 😐🧍and wears the same thing like every day of their life. But yeah he’s super fun to draw and I actually have written some things from his perspective as well which I also think is fun :) he has like a unique perspective like within the characters because of his personality and backstory. I feel like I haven’t shown like the negative sides or what he’s like enough so far though so I’m looking forward to doing that in the future 

19. Who is your most recent OC?

So I think like I’m not going to count people as an oc if they don’t meet the qualifiers of 

-Having a name -Having a solid defined storyline and/or personality -Having been drawn or written abt more than once By this metric I haven’t made any new ocs in a while 😔 I’ve done like character designs but none that have really stuck, probably because I like already have a lot of established ones that I’m focusing more on yk. Like there are a lot of storylines I already have, so I feel like a lot of dynamics + types of characters I find interesting are already covered, and I usually don’t really need to make new ones. Usually my motivation for trying to make new characters is like an aesthetic or tone I think would be interesting but that’s not really enough to base a whole character off of yk. I’d like to come up with more ocs bc I like designing characters but yeah I think I’d like to focus more on my older ones for now. Maybe I’ll try to come up with new like main ocs if/when I finish writing out their story. I feel like the side stories will be in minor character limbo forever bc I don’t really have a story with them and also bc I was picturing them as a comic or visual novel which I would never finish in a million years. Whereas I think I could eventually finish writing something yk.

But anyway time to actually answer the question <3. Actually now that I think abt it it’s probably Connor Armitage collab with @lycanthrology . Does he really count he like canonically exists (long story short he’s another character’s shitty absent father) but doesn’t ever appear or get directly mentioned or anything. Absolutely 0 relevance to the story at all. Also he might not count because Ive never drawn him + I don’t think anything had been written with him.

Before that it’d have to be Dominic Ortega from meat city which is also a collab with various people including @zipmode whose art you should check out <3 (the other people I’m not going to tag here because idk their usernames on this website). First and foremost he is a rabbit furry. But also he’s like an old man who used to be a lawyer but got incredibly tired of his life and so moved to meat city and became an evil wizard instead. Carnomancer specifically bc yk meat city. He likes creating monsters for fun and unleashing them among the populace also for fun, main goal is to escape boredom in life + find some kind of connection even (especially) if it’s negative. He used to have a sort of friend in thr form of James Bianco who was like. His Jesse Pinkman. But unfortunately he was accidentally killed horrifically, and Mr. Ortega’s (Im not on a first name basis with him it feels weird) attempt to resurrect him instead created a mindless zombie which eventually gained an entirely new intelligence. This person’s name is Rico theyre like their own character but the question didn’t ask to explain them as well so I’m not going to <3. But the two characters do interact I might give them like a goal they have to work together to accomplish that might be fun to write abt. But yeah he was created May 2022 so that’s when I have most recently made a new character.

#thanks for sending these :)) #sorry I couldn’t think of anything for the first question #my ocs

[kinanina]

7, 17, 27, 37, 47, 57 and 89 <3

7. Are you in love? Do you want to be?

I'm not in love currently with anyone currently. i think it would be nice, but love for someone takes time and i'm in no rush. these things will come naturally. besides i do admit that im in love with life lol live laugh and love ✌🏻🤪

17. did you have imaginary friends? do you still have them?

i didn't have imaginary friends, but i did daydream a lot about going on adventures in many different settings. from my own ideas to different fictional worlds. i also liked to make up characters and stories (on my own or with my friends) so that could maaaaybe count??? idk??? some characters i still draw from to time today i guess lol

27. are you afraid of growing old?

not at all. the only thing im afraid of is becoming someone i don't really want to be or someone that doesn't align with what i hope i'll be. does that make sense? i do admit tho that time is a very strange concept and it makes me sometimes nostalgic for the past. besides growing old means nothing more than that youve entered a new stage in life. ure the same but completely different and wiser and just more selfassured/care less.

37. do opposites attract?

sure. depends tho on how opposite they are to each other and if it's going to work out. i mean the opposite of yourself may be super interesting at first, but there is things that do have to align in order for the relationship to grow. or at least both parties have to be open enough to accept and change with the other. like at least in ideals, politics etc. has to have a common ground.

47. do you have to suffer to truly understand the human condition?how can you really experience it?

eh i think thats pretty much up to the person themselves. like why does someone have to suffer in order to understand the human condition? what is there to suffer about? we exist and we are the most human every second of our existence, in any state of mind be it suffering or feeling happy. personally i think the best way to understand the human condition is when you look at a person petting an animal or hugging someone they love. i think we became intelligent because we started caring for and bonding with each other. i mean why else do we have pets??? suffering sounds romantic and it sounds smart/realistic to attribute it to human condition. (suffering still being somewhat too romanticized today ngl) though the human condition can be experienced and understood by just existing in whatever condition.

57. do you think humans are obsessed with escapism? are you looking for an escape? do you think it's a bad thing?

yes. especially today were all very very much so obsessed with escapism even more so due to the fact that all media is always and at any time ready to be consumed. we have become so attached to so many forms of escapism that we forget to face ourselves and would rather continue doing whatever else. i dont think escapism is bad though because everyone needs it once in a while. be it through daydreaming or books or hobbies or whatever. i sometimes also look for an escape. the way we live today makes it very, very hard to confront reality as reality has become a very TIRING mixture of bad news, constant barrage of information at all times, constant pressure from work and so on and so on. and due to being constantly exhausted by something around us, we 'need' these breaks more and more often. bruh idk im rambling rn

89. if you lost all your memories would you still have the same personality?

no. because i am my memories, my experience, the people in my life. i may have the genetic personality traits, which came from my ancestors, that may be a part of me anyway, but never again will i be the same again. the new memories and experiences id make, may be completely different from the lost ones and thus id be a new person. maybe the memories and experiences and people all develop the same way but they would still be new to me and i may react to them in a new way and become a new person anyway. in short: you are who you are because of your memories and experience that have been formed by your surroundings and the many people that have come and gone in your life.

thank u so much for sending these!!! if i seem incoherent and like i make no sense, its bc i licherally got rlly sleepy midway thru but had too many ideas that id forget by tomorrow. so <3

#rambling and rambling abt something lmao

[valodia]

OK re that last post/drawing. Lets elaborate on that and add the music score rating. This will sound insane btw. Its highly subjective.

Ou. ter Wil.ds

Gameplay: 5 stars - introduces simple but cool features, nothing extraordinary for my taste but serves what it does perfectly. Low res visuals: 4 stars - just fine, low res as i like it, doesnt crash your computer just watching a LP. loses a star bc its 3d obviously Aes/scenery: 5 stars+ - such creative and artistic sights. awe inspiring. just the DLC's world is incredible by itself but everything is different and unique Mood/vibes: 5 stars+++++ infinite - makes me cry just thinking about it. perfect perfect perfect cannot understate this Storytelling: 5 stars+ - the way the story is told tells just enough and leaves you to figure the rest out, exactly as everything should be. any other type of storytelling is garbage but thats my own subjective opinion Innovation: 5 stars - never seen a game like this. Symbolism: 5 stars+++++ infinite - watched a bunch of hours long analysis videos and learned something about the themes every single time. i still feel like it has more to tell too Worldbuilding: 5 stars+. so creative so creative so creative. sadly the storytelling style doesnt allow for more depth which is fine the way it is for this style. but i yearn to know more Music score: 5 stars+++++ infinite - sound design in general is perfect. idk what else to say its just amazing. not my fave music style though but perfect for what it does here and the associated emotions are gut wrenching. Bonus replayability rating: 0.5 stars - i want to wipe my memory to experience it again, over and over. considering not interacting with it for 10 years to try it again from the top. not likely as im hyperfixating on it currently.

Ken.shi Gameplay: 5 stars+++++ infinite - i never want any other style of gameplay in a game. Low res visuals: 3 stars - low res as i like it. unfortunately this isnt 2d. would have matched the aes so much better. the game is beautiful but could be more which is why this rating is low. Aes/scenery: 4 stars - would be 5 but so much space is empty. it serves the vibe of the game but its also overkill lets be honest Mood/vibes: 4 stars - great. could be better though. see above Storytelling: 5+ stars - i think it isnt infinite stars only bc ive known this game for years and became a bit jaded by it. otherwise my absolute fave style of storytelling. tell almost nothing and speculate. every art do this or die Innovation: 5 stars+ - comes up with so many cool ideas that it actually makes you feel like there are more than there are. anyway unprecedented, never been done before, etc etc etc. the gameplay, the concepts, etc etc. Symbolism: 4 stars - there are a lot of things to say about it. provided that you speculate correctly. could be more but fine the way it is. Worldbuilding: 5 stars+++++ infinite - perfect. Music score: 2.5 stars - its fine but loses at least one star bc part of it makes it annoying. not very diverse either. i usually just turn it off. otherwise great vibes for it. Bonus replayability rating: 4.5 stars - never tire of starting over, in fact its way more fun than the end game stage. play regularly Now lets do Dar.k Chr.o.nicle. Gameplay: 4 stars - cool features for a game like this. Low res visuals: 4 stars - its got that playstation/gamecube goodness Aes/scenery: 4.5 stars - some areas are so pretty Mood/vibes: 4 stars - makes me feel nostalgic and like the world is simple and good, which is kind of the point bc it has black and white retro rpg morality. Storytelling: 2.5 stars - its fine, very conventional for the genre. the time travelling mechanic is incredibly cheesy, best not to think about it too much. Innovation: 3.5 stars - introduces many features ive never seen in a rpg, but at its core stays very true to its genre. Symbolism: 1 stars - good will prevail no matter what and people are evil bc theyre hurt. doesnt really have any deeper themes. Worldbuilding: 2.5 stars. actually 1.5 stars only due to elves and moonfolk Music score: 5 stars - one of my fave instrumentals ever comes from this song and i just still listen to the OST regularly despite the fact that ive played this game as a child first and foremost. ive never forgotten its music Bonus replayability rating: 3 stars - 1 star due to nostalgia factor and another bc its nearly impossible to complete everything. i come back to this game about once every few years

i hope ive been exhaustive otherwise ill edit this. if you read all this wow. really?!

#lodia sayings #long post #rambling about vidya games.

[oetscop]

anyway uhhhh im struggling to focus bc my neck hurts like fuck so im gonna talk abt max and dizzy. and like elaborate on the whole "theyre the same person" thing

so max is my truesona right? his name (maxamillion) actually has a personal meaning to me. my whole life ive fought with identity and ive always had this sort of scattered sense of self. a lot of that comes from childhood neglect and housing instability growing up. every time i move or something bad happens i feel like i get splintered off into another jagged piece of myself, and as life goes on the older pieces get eroded away until i cant even remember who that person was.

i dont want it to sound like DID or something, because its not. its very different. these "other people" never exist at the same time as one another or anything like that. sometimes i can kinda call back how i was at those times in a nostalgic imitation sort of way, but like. its still me? i guess? i dont know.

maxxy is kinda based off the sort of shameless open bleeding wound of a person i was at one time. i was loud and wasnt embarrassed by it. i was open with what i enjoyed. i was clingy but oblivious and sometimes unrealistic.

dizzy is sort of like the more "rational" side of myself. he thinks hes smarter than max because he's been hurt more. hes more familiar with rejection sensitive dysphoria and has been through the same sort of really bad relationship and amicable breakup i went through, as well as the fallout that caused my entire friend group to splinter. hes apprehensive and distant and refuses to trust anyone to an unreasonable degree, hence the quotations.

hes perpetually trying to knock max down a peg or snuff him out. he reminds him how annoying he is when hes loud, he constantly tells him that expressing any emotion about a situation is manipulative. a lot of his character comes from the song hope by roar (among others) and specifically the line "if your hearts upon your sleeve, amputate the arm." hes very motivated by revenge.

really he comes from a well intentioned place, but hes also aware that hes being harmful. he thinks its for the best.

and in his defense max isnt a good person either, not entirely. hes terrified of losing people, but instead of growing distant to avoid pain like dizzy, he becomes incredibly clingy. constantly disarming himself and asking what he would have to do to keep someone around. he has no sense of self and is willing to just drop everything for someone. even if they hurt him. hes also insecure and somehow also full of himself.

but like, they are also literally the same person. the same dog, i guess. but they can interact physically with each other. dizzy looks exactly like max, just with mirrored fur patterns and is more desaturated in color. his hair is also like....greasier. and matted. max has really soft hair but dizzy spends most of his time in bed or just at home so he doesnt take care of himself. sometimes max can convince him to let him brush it. they have a very codependent relationship with eachother. well, okay that makes it sound romantic. its more like a symbiosis sort of thing. parasitic perhaps. theyll kill eachother together but theyll die if theyre apart.

it actually started with like..giving max an A/B/NLM sorta thing (since i do that a lot actually! give ocs traits from a specific media i like a lot. one of my other sonas shrinks when hes upset like cassie from dragon tales) but it sorta just became what it is now. idk why?? i still sometimes draw max with a flower on his head tho lol. its hard not to involve that when hes my truesona and care and paul r like........the focal points of my entire identity and sense of self rn lol. but theyre also nothing like max so i scrapped that.

idk this makes liek no sense lololol. theres far more "versions" that i might flesh out in the future? but for now its just the two of em. hooty hoo

#tongue #max #dizzy

[emsloe]

1, 8, 17, 22, 26, and 29!

What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

UM. I mean. this is very embarrassing for me to admit but I do most of my drafting in the notes app on my phone. So… whatever the default notes app font is 😬 In my defense it’s very convenient to write on my phone and last time I tested it I could do like 85 wpm that way so it's not that slow. If I’m writing on my computer I like times new roman for some reason. Maybe just because I got used to looking at it when I was in school? idk!

If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

I’ve written dialogue-only stories before! We had some writing exercises in creative writing classes like that. Dialogue is way easier for me to write than action tbh, my writing is often dialogue-heavy anyway. I feel like you can kinda convey a lot of action through dialogue anyway!

Talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. Tell me about the lore, the history, the detail, the things that won’t make it in the text.

I am so sorry I cannot answer this question LOL. Every time I try, even if I'm trying to just talk about one specific aspect of it, the answer ends up way way too long. When someone gets me talking about my WIP I cannot shut up and it is so embarrassing lmao! I typed a big infodump and then deleted it and typed out a different one and then deleted it. I can't make it concise I'm sorry 😭

How organized are you with your writing? Describe to me your organization method, if it exists. What tools do you use? Notebooks? Binders? Apps? The Cloud?

usually i draft stuff on my phone in the notes app, and when it gets long enough to make me nervous I move it to Scrivener, where I edit and such. My scrivener project is kind of organized chaos at this point; I don’t totally write linearly, so the complete chapters I have are organized in folders and labeled, with notes about where they need to go and what needs to happen before/after and a general summary of the contents. Then there’s a separate folder for incomplete fragments of things and a folder for scenes and a folder for brainstorming, which is mostly just jumbled incoherent notes haha!

How do you get into your character’s head? How do you get out? Do you ever regret going in there in the first place?

getting into my characters’ heads is especially important in this story I think, more so than anything else I have ever written in my entire life. And it’s kind of overwhelming sometimes and I really don’t have a great strategy usually beyond “take so many notes.” Seth is easiest because tbh I started writing this story to help me process my own brain things. It became its own thing but to some extent I still sorta feel like Seth is “me” in a way. He’s still really hard to write because he’s an unreliable narrator who has a lot going on, but it’s relatively easy to get into his headspace compared to other characters. For everyone else I just take extra notes so I can try to nail down their head spaces better.

Like. FOR EXAMPLE. There’s a scene toward the end where Seth goes back to visit someone for the first time in 8 years. And I was having trouble figuring out what kind of reaction that person would have. So i ended up writing an extra 1.5k words in that character’s perspective about his life, ending where that scene would begin. It ended up working really well!

Also I have a (short) spotify playlist for Seth so that helps :)

Where do you draw your inspiration? What do you do when the inspiration well runs dry?

I get SO many ideas from dreams it is unbelievable. I am still (slowly) working on my dream journal project because the number of dreams I have that are fully coherent stories with plot and a hero’s journey and everything is ridiculous. The setting for my main WIP also came from a dream. I came up with Seth while doodling on the bus, ended up putting him in the dream setting, and everything else has just been good old brainstorming and tweaking

TY FOR THE ASK I love thinking about my wip!!

#long post #asks #whenever someone asks what my novel is about. like making small talk. I literally cannot elaborate beyond 'it's about a guy who dies and #comes back to life.' bc the alternative is me rambling for an hour and boring the person to death #some people are under the impression that i'm writing a ghost revenge story and I know I can't really correct them or else I will #embarrass myself by talking too much haha! #surge talks

[catdotnip]

Hades Shepard? Slowly lowering her walls and falling in love? It's more likely than you think

#shenko #f!shepard x kaidan #kaidan alenko #mass effect #mass effect 1 #mass effect legendary edition #me:le #hades shepard #anyway so this (just like idk every other drawing i make) became a lot more work than orginally intended but its ok #idk what perspective is tho or what fuckin angle the camera's at bc w o w i e g a m e r s its rough #idk orginally this was supposed to be a screenshot redraw of the one scene where they almost kiss but then it just kinda turned into this #in my head kaidan's talkin abt canada or smthn and hades is like 'bro i'm from michigan i've SEEN canada'