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its-me-im-coraline · 3 years

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First impressions // All

words // 1184

warnings // not explicit smut, more like teasing of smut

pairing // none particular, gn!reader

author's note // if you want to be on the tag list let me know. this is such bad writing omg. I can not easily navigate a scene between so many people without it looking weird i am so sorry and i do hope you like it. sorry for not posting last night but as i said i was having a panic attack. anyway im better now, hopefully ill be able to post one more fic tonight

request // yeap, here it is

summary // The band might have considered more than once of ‘entertaining’ their best friend. After their I wanna be your slave video comes out, sweet ol’ Thomas can not help but suggest they encounter their reacting to the video clip and showing them some of their moves.

Thomas’ idea did not just come out of the blue. It was not a spontaneous thing to do, but a long time formulated thought coming into reality. In all honesty, Thomas, Victoria, Ethan and Damiano had thought about it before, plenty of times. Having Y/N stay with them any time they were at the studio house was flaring up these thoughts like crazy. It was not just one time that the four of them had talked about railing them senseless initiating something more sexual with them, only the fear that they would be pushed away, keeping them from making a move. But after having seen the anticipation from the promotion for theri video clip of I wanna be your slave, Thomas went out on a limp making a move for them all after the video dropped.

“Hey, Y/N, what are you up to?” There were no regards as to whether it was ok to get in or not. The man just sat on the bed, a phone in his hand with it’s screen lit up already.

“Not much, Thomas. I was just finishing some things up on my laptop. What are you guys doing here, all together?” It was not common for all of them to be in the room at once. Usually they only were all together in the living room or outside, the time in any bedrooms spent with two or three at the time and late at night when they couldn't sleep.

By now the other three occupied the small room, sitting anywhere they could: a chair on the desk, on top of said desk, the bed. “We were thinking, cucciolo.” The one to speak up now was Ethan, sitting on their other side, hand in their hair, messing with it just like he always did.

“Our video clip is out and we wanted to see your reaction.”

“I told you guys I’ll watch it when I’m done with the assignments-”

“Did you not just say you’re done?” Damiano had a sneaky smirk on his face, seeing how flushed he made the band’s friend, getting caught in excuses.

Maybe I just don’t want to see it around you, they thought, avoiding to speak, instead nodding their head.

“Then let’s watch it, puppy.” This time it was Victoria’s chance to speak up, taunting the poor person on the bed. The blonde was on the other side of the room but it did not stop her from making Y/N flush in their seat, only fueling her desire to film the up and coming reactions.

Before the video started everyone shifted. Damiano and Ethan were on the right side of Y/N, Thomas and Victoria occupying the left, all within reach of the poor puppy in the middle. They all knew how quickly they’d react to it all, squirming in their seat at the thought of Vic tasting them like a candied apple. “Do you like it, puppy? Want me to tease you like that?” said girl questioned, never weavering from the filming

It seemed like every little thought was simply worse than the previous, the tip of the iceberg being Victoria tied up, all so wonderfully. Such a sight for sore eyes. At it Y/N let out a strained gasp, unable to hold it in.”What is it, cucciolo, you want to be tied like that? I can do it for you,” whispered Ethan, hands quick to tie up Y/N’s with a shoelace he found a few minutes ago. It was not tight but it was enough to restrain their arms behind them.

“So good you are,” he praised, placing his hand in their hair, giving space for Damiano to put his on their thigh.

The video went on, all these scenes with Damiano screaming at everyone’s face simply heightened the already extreme emotions Y/N was experiencing. The man himself could only laugh at that, face coming close to theirs, just like he did for Thomas on the video clip, so assertive, dominating even.

“Are you enjoying yourself, puppet?” His words pierced through them, shivers overtaking their body, a feeling that could only be described as anxiety but also excitement accompanying it.

It was all a dream, or it felt like it. Such situation was too good to be true for Y/N, causing the fear of this being just a very realistic dream. But, Thomas’ kisses on their neck and Ethan’s light tugs on their hair reminded them of the reality they were living inside of. “Use your words, bambino,” said Damiano, the same smirk as before all over his face.

“Yes, I enjoy this,” they finally whispered, words forced out.

The next few seconds were quiet, only facial expressions portraying any reaction, all four of the band members just looking, admiring their beautiful friend and silently agreeing on their next move. It was when they saw Damiano and Ethan kiss and share that pink bubble gum that the band got entertained. Their lips got parted, cheeks flushed to the point of ‘burning’ to the touch, their eyes got wide, all but drooling over the scene unfolding in front of their eyes.

A shock wave shot through Y/N’s body as Ethan grabbed their head, tilting it back, the video clip still in the background, attacking their lips in a hungry kiss. It was hot, wet and sloppy, and it went on for a bit, until the tall drummer ushered his tongue into the mix, allowing the same type of cherry bubble gum from the video clip to move in Y/N’s mouth at once. They did not know what to do, their mind utterly blank and unable to decide on an action.

“Bite it.” Thomas let the two words out of his mouth, straight into their ear. He looked so shy and innocent most of the time, who would have thought he had it in him. “Now move your head, puppy, just like that,” he all but moaned, pulling them back towards him.

“So good for us all,” Thomas spoke again, now him being the one to kiss Y/N, ridding their mouth of the gum and leaving sloppy kisses from their lips to their neck.

Victoria was fed up with how long the escalation was taking, unable to wait a minute longer before she could have her second of fun. With that thought in mind, she pulled the phone from Y/N’s hands, shutting it off and setting it on the nightstand.

“You already know what happens after, pet.” Her voice was more demanding than anyone could anticipate, very bossy one could say, but Y/N was not going to be the one to challenge it.

“Tell me if you are uncomfortable, baby.” Y/N let out a small ‘do it’, opening up their mouth and just waiting, caressing Victoria’s hands on their face.

“Such a good pet,” she praised, going ahead to spit in their mouth before assessing her ‘art’.

“I think we need another ‘rehearsal’ to get it right,” smirked Damiano, “there’s just a few more creative touches we need to add.”

tag list: @bieberhoodforever @tabi-toast @ginny-lily @moriro-da-regina @the-killer-queenie @makapaka11 @teenyweenynightghost @superchrystaldrug

#maneskin #maneskin imagine #maneskin fanfiction #måneskin #måneskin headcanon #måneskin smut #måneskin x reader #måneskin imagine #måneskin fanfic

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bibuddie · 2 years

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time to talk day | 2022

so i was inspired to make this post by the wonderful @stagefoureddiediaz who spoke so openly and candidly about her experiences with mental illness and the stigma around it. as kym said, today is known as time to talk day in the uk, and it's all about opening the door for conversation around mental health, mental illness and wellbeing in general. i feel like i'm generally pretty open, but there is a lot i haven't shared, that i feel ready to. so, allow me to take you on a journey.

this is going to be incredibly long, but it'll be cathartic for me and i hope you get something out of it too.

tw for parental death, bullying, anxiety, alcohol misuse, depression, panic attacks, sexual harrasment, suicidal ideation and thoughts. if any of this will make this post too hard to read, i completely understand and i love you anyways.

so, my journey with mental health starts around the age of eight. i never really fit into any one particular crowd at school - i wasn't good at sports, i wasn't interested in causing trouble or playing pranks. i just wanted to be left alone in the corner of the school yard with my books. i used to sit and read encyclopedias for fun, and would often blurt random facts out in conversation. i was such a bright kid, interested in everything and anything around me. but unfortunately, that made me different - it made me stick out and kids took advantage of that.

i'd get called weird and annoying and sometimes just plain left out of games when i was younger. and it stung at first, and had me wondering at the age of eight if there was something wrong with me, but over time, i grew a thicker skin and it didn't really bother me. things really escalated when i was ten.

there was this group of maybe five or six boys in my class who were all in the popular crowd and really really took issue with me. at this time, i was attending a youth group at the church associated with my school and the main perpetrator's mum was one of the volunteers. she was a lovely woman and always made sure i had everything i needed. however, the son didn't like me very much at all. it all came to a head one day when he cornered me on the school ground and told me that if i didn't start wearing a bra, he would get me banned from youth group. we were both ten and my boobs literally hadn't started growing yet.

eventually, one day i refused to go to school. wouldn't say why, just refused. my dad asked me why, because as i said earlier, i loved learning and i was fucking excellent at school - i was probably the top of my year at that time. and i just broke down and told him everything. he went straight to the school and told them, and things got resolved, but that kind of stuff sticks with you.

then, in january 2011, my dad took seriously ill with absolutely no warning. he had an undiagnosed aneurysm in his brain that ruptured, causing a subarachnoid brain haemorrhage. he couldn't move, couldn't eat, couldn't talk. it was absolutely devastating because my dad was my absolute best friend in the world. a week after he got admitted into hospital, he had a cardiac arrest and passed away. i was 11 at the time and it absolutely destroyed me.

i developed severe attachment issues with my mum, needing to know where she was going at all times and what she was doing and when she would be back. if she was even five minutes late home from work, i'd start spiralling thinking she was dead and i would have what i now know to be very intense panic attacks. i slept with her in her bed for 18 months because i was too scared to sleep alone due to nightmares i'd have and fear of something happening to her in the night without me being there.

eventually, my mum took me to the GP and, after a lot of very probing, intense questions i was diagnosed with anxiety and depression at the age of twelve. i remember not really knowing what those words meant, but just not wanting to feel bad anymore. i got referred to CAMHS (child and adolescent mental health services) and very slowly, things started to get a bit better - i had a support worker who came to my house twice a week for six weeks, and i saw a psychologist for six months and things began to improve bit by bit. i made friends and i'd go on outings and i felt like a human for the first time in a long while.

i ended up being put on antidepressants for the first time when i was sixteen. the thing with depression is it can be a one off occurrence during your life, or it can be recurring. both experiences are completely valid. for me, through a combination of factors, my depression and anxiety seems like it's going to be with me for the rest of my life, and i've slowly managed to come to terms with that. when i was sixteen, exam stress caused a particularly nasty bout of depression to rear its head, and my doctor decided to put me on citalopram (also known as celexa).

things were relatively stable until just before my nineteenth birthday. i'd started my dream degree, moved to my favourite city, made an amazing group of friends who i felt like i could be completely myself with. things were slotting into place in ways they never had, and then my mum got diagnosed with breast cancer. i packed up all my stuff in four hours and moved back home to be with her and support her through her treatment. the months my mum had chemo were some of the worst months of my life, watching her get constant infections and be in pain and barely be able to get off the sofa and knowing there was literally nothing i could do about it.

she got the all clear in june 2019, after two surgeries and seven cycles of chemotherapy. i treated her and i to a long weekend away together in november 2019, and i will always cherish the time we spent together on that holiday. we drank and laughed and joked together and i thought, man, life’s finally looking up for us. we’re finally going to get to be happy.

my mum passed away on 28th february 2020, when i was 20 years old. she was 50. she had several large blood clots on her lungs, and eventually they stopped her heart. the twisted thing is, i was her next of kin, meaning that the decision to withdraw care ultimately fell onto my shoulders. that’s still something i struggle to come to terms with today, and i probably will always struggle with.

my mum’s death came right before the coronavirus pandemic intensified in the uk. her funeral was the last one held in our local church. i don’t remember a lot of the month after her death, just odd little bursts here and there. after she died, we went into lockdown and so the time where my family would’ve normally rallied around me and my brother to support us, they couldn’t. my only escape was work, and so 24 days after my mum passed away, i went back to work. looking back now, it was way too soon and i was mentally in no fit state to be there but at the time, it was the right decision for me.

after my mum died, i was hit a hell of a lot harder than when my dad died, which i didn’t really think was possible. i think because of a combination of factors, maybe including the fact that i had a better understanding of what was happening. but i spiralled hard. i drank a lot, and i mean a lot. i was drinking pretty much every night until i was drunk because it was easier being drunk than it was feeling everything i was going through. many times, both drunk and sober i ended up sitting with a box of painkillers in my hands and just wondering if maybe things would be easier if i just…never had to feel anything again. if i never had to feel the crushing burden of grief that i’d be carrying with me for the rest of my life. i never did anything but i’d be lying if i said there weren’t times i came close.

eventually, i had a breakdown. i remember the exact date, weirdly enough. june 10th 2020. i was working from home (doing my old call centre job) and my manager called me for a meeting because my performance that weekend had been especially bad. and i just lost my mind. i was sobbing hysterically on the call and i couldn’t breathe and i remember him trying to talk me out of a panic attack. i ended up taking almost three months off of work because i needed a lot of therapy very very badly. my dosage of my antidepressants got upped again too and after, i was doing better.

fast forward to february 2021, and i get hospitalised out of the blue. i had palpitations, which i’d never had before. i had a doctor try to tell me it was due to anxiety, but having been dealing with the beast that is my anxiety for years, i could tell him it wasn’t. i went to the hospital and instantly got put in the area for the sickest patients, which scared me a lot. i’d never even had an IV before this. they admitted me overnight for monitoring and testing, and take me to a ward. it was the ward my mum died on. even worse, the bed they admitted me into was the bed she had a cardiac arrest in. i didn’t sleep at all that night, visions of the night my mum died playing over and over in my head, as well as worrying about what was wrong with my heart.

i got discharged the next day and referred to a cardiologist. i had some further testing done in march 2021, and then didn’t speak to my cardiologist until july. he basically told me there was nothing wrong with me, and i asked him politely if that was the case, why i was still having symptoms. and he just said i don’t know, and said if it was still bothering me to contact my gp.

currently, i’m in a bit of a weird place. i’m not doing amazingly well, but i feel like i’ve managed to spot the warning signs of a depressive episode quite early on and as a result, i can put things in place before things get really bad. i still struggle a lot of the time, don’t get me wrong but i fair much better compared to how i used to.

if you’ve managed to get to the end of this, thank you. i appreciate you. remember that no problem is too small for you to reach out for help. you’re worthy of happiness. today might be the day you start up a conversation, or it might be the day you think about it. who knows?

#rebecca rambles #mental health #mental health awareness #time to talk #time to talk day #depression awareness #anxiety awareness

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james-joyces-right-eyeball · 3 years

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Absolute Favorite Books I’d Recommend to Anyone

This is a list of my top-tier favorite books that I would recommend/talk about endlessly to pretty much anyone (in no particular order). I know people probably don’t care but I just like talking about books I love so here we are.

Beloved - Toni Morrison

~ Based off the real story of Margaret Garner, a slave woman who escaped slavery and when captured killed her child in order to prevent them from ever being enslaved again, Beloved tells the story of a mother named Sethe, born in slavery who eventually escaped and is haunted by the figurative demons of her trauma and the literal (arguably) ghost of her dead daughter, who she herself killed. It is an excellent exploration of the horrors of slavery and of the haunting legacy of the institution for those who were subjected to it.

Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov

~ If you’ve been on Tumblr for a while, you probably know what Lolita is. The story of the predatory Humbert Humbert who lusts after, rapes, and kidnaps the “nymphet” Dolores Haze. An excellent construction of how predators, unreliable narrators in their own right, hide behind fabrications, almost-believable excuses, and pretty words to make their actions seem maybe not so bad. In the words of the book itself, “You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style.”

Ulysses - James Joyce

~ Notoriously one of the most difficult books in the English language, Ulysses lifts its structure from Homer’s Odyssey to tell the story of a common man, Leopold Bloom, as he goes about his day. Yes, this book takes place over the course of only one day. We follow Bloom as well as Joyce’s literary counterpart Stephen Daedalus through their thoughts and actions, gathering details of their lives previous throughout. It’s a book that, in my own words, “is life”. It is sad, funny, strange, vulgar, disgusting, beautiful, revelatory, sensual, and nonsensical all at once. Joyce aimed to create a reflection of life through his stream-of-consciousness style which some people might find confusing, but I personally find absolutely beautiful and honest and realistic. The prose is also gorgeous, but that could be applied to everything Joyce wrote.

Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte

~ The classic gothic book that tells the tale of Heathcliff and his ultimately destructive love of Catherine Earnshaw, whose eventual marriage to someone else and the general mistreatment of him by her family drives Heathcliff insane and he spends the rest of his life trying to take revenge by abusing and torturing the next Earnshaw and Linton (the family into which Catherine marries) generations. If I’m being honest, I like this book mostly because of how wild and dark it is, but the writing is also genius and beautiful. I think the book also carries an interesting view of the destructive nature of revenge, overzealous love, and othering.

A Tree Grows in Brooklyn - Betty Smith

~ A coming-of-age story at the turn of the century that tells the story of Francie Nolan, a young bookish girl growing up in a lower class family in New York City. It tells about her father’s struggles with alcoholism as well as her mother’s struggles to deal with that and at the same time raise Francie and her brother. Francie is confronted with a strange, uncertain world as a young girl, but tries to face it with bravery throughout childhood

Little Women - Louisa May Alcott

~ Another coming-of-age story, this time about four young sisters: Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy March. You are probably familiar with this book already; it’s had more movie adaptations then I can possibly remember off the top of my head. It’s the story of four sisters as they try to navigate growing up, love, and loss during the mid to late 1800s.

The Color Purple - Alice Walker

~ A novel that tells the story of Celie, a young black woman who is raped and then married young to a man who will go on to use and abuse her, through her letters to God. Throughout the novel she meets Shug Avery, a woman with whom she eventually falls in love and begins a relationship with. Through this and her eventual freedom from her abusive husband, she is able to gain at last her own sense of self and take back control over her life, a life no longer ruled by the abusive men around her.

The Bluest Eye - Toni Morrison

~ The tragic story of young black girl Pecola Breedlove, who wants nothing more than to have blonde hair and blue eyes just like the women she sees in the movies. Both a deconstruction of the whiteness of beauty standards as well as how these standards can utterly destroy vulnerable young girls, it is also an exploration of the people who allow these sorts of things to happen, including Pecola’s mother and father. The Bluest Eye, I think, showcases one of the aspects of Toni Morrison that I like the most, that I aspire to the most: her ability to enter the minds of all people, even people who you might despise at first. Her characters, especially Cholly in The Bluest Eye, are ones you might not entirely sympathize with, but they will always be ones you understand.

The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath

~ Based off of the author’s own experiences as a young college student, The Bell Jar tells the story of Esther Greenwood, whose depression over her place as a woman in a patriarchal society as well as her inability to choose a life path for herself leads to a suicide attempt and a subsequent stay in a mental hospital. A very nuanced portrayal of mental illness, especially anxiety and depression, The Bell Jar is an extremely moving and relatable story for me and clearly is as well for others. It is a classic for a reason.

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings - Maya Angelou

~ A memoir of Angelou’s childhood, this book tells the story of her experiences living as a black girl in the south with her grandmother and brother as well as her later years living with her mother. It also tells of how she was raped by her mother’s boyfriend when she was around eight or nine, and how she struggled to live with that and find her voice, both literally and figuratively. A wonderful book about overcoming struggles and the power of words and literature in such times.

Invisible Man - Ralph Ellison

~ Ellison’s novel tells the story of a young black man, never getting a name in the text, and his feelings of invisibility and his struggles to find a place in society to belong. His struggles only lead him further into despair, until he decides to “become invisible” as people seem not to see him as a person anyway. Invisible Man is an exploration of American mid-century racism and the isolation it causes to those subjected to it. Not only that, but it is surprisingly relevant to our times now, especially on the subject of police violence. (Personal anecdote: When I first read this book, when I got to the aforementioned police violence part it was right in the middle of the BLM resurgence last summer and I cried for a good twenty minutes while reading that chapter over how nothing had changed and it still hurts me to think about it. Embarrassingly, my dad walked in on me while I was crying, and I had to quickly explain it away.)

A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man - James Joyce

~ The title basically says it all lol. This book tells of the coming-of-age of Stephen Daedalus (the same one from the later-written Ulysses). His sensitive childhood, his awkward and lustful adolescence, his feelings of Irish nationality and Catholic guilt, and his struggles to fully realize himself, both as an artist and a human being. It is a very hopeful story, and one that I love mostly because I relate so much to Stephen Daedalus as an artist and as a person.

One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez

~ A magical-realist intergenerational family drama, Marquez’s book traces the various lives and loves of the Buendia family over the course of (you guessed it!) one hundred years. A beautifully written, at times extremely emotionally moving and chilling masterpiece, Marquez in a way retells the history of Colombia, of its colonization and exploitation.

Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy

~ A classic Russian novel of society and love, Tolstoy tells the story of Anna Karenina, married, wealthy woman with a child she adores. However, she falls in love with another man, Count Vronsky, and comes to a tragic end for her love. The parallel story of the novel is that of Konstantin Levin, a wealthy landowner who also struggles to find fulfillment in his life and understand his place in society.

The Sound and the Fury - William Faulkner

~ A novel that features an entire family of unreliable narrators, The Sound and the Fury details the fall of a once-prominent southern Compson family and always-present place of the past. There are four different narratives: Benjy Compson, a mentally disabled man who is unsure of his surroundings and of time and only knows that he misses his older sister Caddy; Quintin Compson, the eldest son and a Harvard man both obsessed with his sister retaining her “purity” and the fact that she failed to do so and had a baby out of wedlock, going as far to claim it is his baby in an attempt to preserve something of the family reputation; Jason Compson, who is the caretaker of Caddy’s daughter and believes her to be going down her mother’s “sinful” path; and Dilsey, the black maid of the Compson’s who unlike the people she cares for is not weighed down by their history. The narratives take place in different time periods and is in a stream-of-consciousness style. It’s a deeply dark and disturbing novel about the haunting nature of the past, a common theme in Faulkner’s work (see Absalom, Absalom! for more of this).

Song of Solomon - Toni Morrison

~ It is the story of Milkman Dead, a young black man growing up in the south and his relationship with his very complicated family. To say anymore would be to spoil the novel, but I will say that it is an excellent book about family, self-fulfillment in a world that tries to deny you that, and, like The Bluest Eye, exhibits Morrison’s excellent character work.

Cat on a Hot Tin Roof - Tennessee Williams

~ A play which takes place on the patriarch of a family’s birthday in the oppressive heat of the midsummer south, Williams’ play explores lies, secrets, and how repression only results in anger, frustration, and sadness. It’s a tragic but brilliant play that I think was very ahead of its time. If you’ve read it (or do read it) then you know what I mean.

Giovanni’s Room - James Baldwin

~ This book tells the story of a young man and his love of another man named Giovanni while he is in Paris. It is a book about love, queer guilt, and has what I would call an ambiguous ending. There is uncertainty at the end, but there does seem to be some kind of acceptance. It is a bit of a coming-out story, but more than that it is a story of personal acceptance and at the same time a sad, tragic love story.

HERmione - H.D.

~ An underrated modernist masterpiece, HERmione is a somewhat fictionalized account of the author, Hilda Doolittle’s, experience as a young aspiring poet dating another poet (in real life Ezra Pound in this book named George Lowndes) who is a threat to her both physically and emotionally. It explores her own mental state, as she considers herself a failure and falls in love with a woman for the first time (Fayne Rabb in the book, Frances Gregg in real life).

To the Lighthouse - Virginia Woolf

~ People think about going to a lighthouse. They do not. A couple years and a war passes then they do. That may seem like a boring plot, and you may be right. However, To the Lighthouse is not much about plot. It is more about the inner lives of its characters, a family and their friends, on two different occasions of their lives: one before WWI and one after WWI. Woolf explores in this novel the trauma that results from such a massive loss of life and security. Not only that, she also explores the nature of art (especially in female artists) in the character of Lily Briscoe and her struggles to complete a painting. It’s a short novel, but it contains so much about life, love, and loss within these few pages.

The Heart is a Lonely Hunter - Carson McCullers

~ A southern gothic novel about isolation and loneliness in a small town. Every character has something to separate them from wider society, and often find solace and companionship in a deaf man, John Singer, who himself experiences a loneliness that they cannot understand. There are various forms of social isolation explored in this novel: by race, disability, age, gender, etc. A wonderful, heart-wrenching book about loneliness and the depths it can potentially drag people to.

The Waste Land - T.S. Eliot

~ A modernist masterpiece of a poem, Eliot describes feeling emptiness and isolation. The brilliance of it can only be shown by an excerpt:

“Your arms full, and your hair wet, I could not Speak, and my eyes failed, I was neither Living nor dead, and I knew nothing, Looking into the heart of light, the silence.”

“The river’s tent is broken: the last fingers of leaf Clutch and sink into the wet bank. The wind Crosses the brown land, unheard. The nymphs are departed. Sweet Thames, run softly, till I end my song. The river bears no empty bottles, sandwich papers, Silk handkerchiefs, cardboard boxes, cigarette ends Or other testimony of summer nights. The nymphs are departed. And their friends, the loitering heirs of city directors; Departed, have left no addresses. By the waters of Leman I sat down and wept . . . Sweet Thames, run softly till I end my song, Sweet Thames, run softly, for I speak not loud or long. But at my back in a cold blast I hear The rattle of the bones, and chuckle spread from ear to ear. “

(My personal favorite line from this poem is, “I will show you fear in a handful of dust.”)

The Trial - Franz Kafka

~ The protagonist of the novel, Josef K., wakes up one morning to find that he has been placed under arrest for reasons that are kept from him. Kafka creates throughout the novel a scathing satire of bureaucracy, as K. tries to find out more about his case, more about his trial, but only becomes more confused as he digs deeper. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the world he lives in, and the more tries to explain it the further the more that proves to be the case. An excellently constructed novel and a great one to read if you would like to be depressed about the state of the world because, though Kafka’s work is a satire, like a lot of his other work, it manages to strike a strangely real note.

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead - Tom Stoppard

~ An absurdist play that is a retelling of Shakespeare’s Hamlet from the perspective of minor characters, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, who in the broad overview of the original play, do not matter. Throughout the play, they question their existence and the purpose of it and through that Stoppard dissects not only the absurdity of life, but how fiction and theater reflect that absurdity inadvertently.

As I Lay Dying - William Faulkner

~ The novel details the journey the Bundren family makes after the death of the family matriarch, Addie, to bury her. Each chapter offers a different narrative from the family members and those who surround them, revealing some ulterior motives to them “going to town” to bury Addie. The patriarch Anse desires a pair of false teeth, and the daughter Dewey Dell is pregnant and needs an abortion, as there is no way for her or her family to support it. It’s about the powerlessness of people in the impoverished south. The Bundrens are constantly subject to forces beyond their control, struggles which would be easily solved if they had the money to spare for it. There is more to the book, but that is my favorite reading of it, that of class. Faulkner’s ability to create distinct voices for every one of his characters shines through here.

And, last but not least:

The Collected Poems - Sylvia Plath

~ All the poems Plath wrote during her tragically short lifetime. The best way to demonstrate or summarize the book’s brilliance is just to show you. This is her poem “Edge”, which appears in the book:

“The woman is perfected. Her dead Body wears the smile of accomplishment, The illusion of a Greek necessity Flows in the scrolls of her toga, Her bare Feet seem to be saying: We have come so far, it is over. Each dead child coiled, a white serpent, One at each little Pitcher of milk, now empty. She has folded Them back into her body as petals Of a rose close when the garden Stiffens and odors bleed From the sweet, deep throats of the night flower. The moon has nothing to be sad about, Staring from her hood of bone. She is used to this sort of thing. Her blacks crackle and drag.”

HOPE YOU ENJOYED! HAPPY READING TO ALL!

#dark academia #books and literature #toni morrison #james joyce #tennessee williams #virginia woolf #william faulkner #sylvia plath #plays #poetry #can you tell i like southern and modernist lit lol?

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descendantofthesparrow · 3 years

Text

Bad End rewrite - Harry concept

youtube

Harry flipped through a thick old leather bound book, labeled ‘curses and gods’ since he was young he had wondered why his eyes turned red when got angry or his emotions ran high. he wondered why when his eyes turned red an urge to spill blood pushed through his mind. and after confronting his father about it, he finally knew why.

a blood curse, cast on James when he angered one of the fairies on neverland however many years ago, and cursed him. it would be passed down from James to whoever he created, meaning Harriet, Harry, and Cj were all born with the curse.

his father didn't bother telling him the name of the curse, only where he had gotten it from and the type of curse. and after confiding in FG she had told Harry where he might find that type of curse.

in the very book he was flipping through.

“blood curse, blood curse, blood curse-ah” he stopped at a very old and worn down page that had the words ‘Blood curses’ “there we go” he muttered trailing his finger down the pages until he landed on the words ‘red eyes’

he started at the beginning of the paragraph, sighing to himself as he settled in for a few minutes of reading from how much this one curse took up the page.

‘the victim under the curse will suffer from intense feelings of rage and insanity and their eyes will flash red, becoming completely red if they let the rage or madness overcome them. during these bouts the victim will get the urge to hurt and possibly kill depending on the severity, the victim may possibly hear voices, telling the victim to kill among many other things, those who have been under this curse say the voices tell them to spill blood. they say sometimes the voices are angry, sometimes sad, sometimes chaotic, sometimes helpful, but they always want one thing; Blood.’

Harry took a deep breath, well, the only thing that matched him was the red eyes, and the slight madness, even back on the isle since he was a kid he was a little mad, i mean....he did try to get tick tock to bit his hand off then when the croc didn't he tried to cut it off when Uma stopped him. but he did NOT have constant voices in his head telling him to kill...well...other than when he got way to into a fight. he continued to read, pausing as he read the small note at the bottom of the paragraph

‘victims also reported heightened strength, speed, agility, sight, and increased fighting ability's, even if the victim had no know-how of combat prior to fighting’

Harrys mind flashed back to when he fought Davy on the isle, how once Davy had mentioned Uma, Harry felt something snap and red incased his vision, he had done things he didn't know he could do even after he started sparring with (y/n) and Lonnie. he remembered lifting Davy off his feet by just pressing his arm to Davy’s throat, something that he had never really been able to to.

he trailed his eyes back up, heart stopping as he reached the title of the curse he had found that matched his “symptoms”

-THE CURSE OF THE BLOOD GOD-

his eyes flashed back down to right below the title, swallowing down the pit in his throat as he read the description of the curse.

‘the curse of the blood god, also known as the madness curse. it is unknown if this curse holds a god behind its name and magic, but according to its victims, the blood god is a very real being that demands blood and death for unknown reasons. studies revealed that this curse can be passed through bloodlines’

Harry felt his leg start to bounce with anxiety as he re-read the symptoms paragraph, clenching his jaw as at the bottom right corner of the page was a small note ‘known victims of the blood god curse’

Harry took a deep breath to prepare himself, quickly flipping the page to just get it over with. his blood froze.

-known victims of the blood god curse-

the Queen of Hearts

Shan Yu

Red Skull

Wade Wilson

Harry stared at the name below ‘Wade Wilson’, feeling as if his whole world had shattered

Captain James Hook

there were a good handful of names but Harry ignored them, he just sat in his chair, staring down at the words that he had hoped weren't true. the blood god curse...he was cursed, actually fucking cursed with something that would probably drive him fucking crazy! voices, bouts of rage and insanity, the almost constant urge to kill.

what-what if he hurt-

Harry fumbled through the blood god curse page, relief washing over him as he found one of the final notes of the curse.

-studies reveal that victims of the curse, instead of the theory that they would hurt or possibly kill their loved ones, would instead would be pushed to protect and care for them. the victims seem to only attack those who hurt them or their loved ones, or people of whom they don't know that well. the victims revealed that around their loved ones the voices, instead of asking for blood, seemed to either quiet down, become silent, or yell praise and love at the loved one. and when the loved one was threatened, the voices yelled to protect and scream for the blood of the one threatening. it should be noted that it has been very rare for victims to become insane from this curse, as long as its taken care of properly, the victim can live an almost normal life-

Harry let out the biggest sigh of relief he had ever let out, leaning back in his chair and rubbing his face, that meant he wouldn't hurt (y/n) or anyone else he cared about, instead it seemed this curse would only help him protect them if anything happened.

‘blood’

Harry froze, quickly sitting up and looking around the seemingly empty library “whose there!?” Harry called out, panic filling his voice

‘kill’ ‘blood’ ‘we want blood’ ‘do it do it’ ‘kill’ ‘blood for the blood god’ ‘stab something’

Harry covered his ears and snapped his eyes shut, tears burning in his eyes as he realized what was happening, the voices, just like the book said, asking for blood. why, why now?! why him?! after 19 years of nothing but his eyes flashing and bouts of mania all of a sudden, NOW, he hears the voices?!

‘blood’ ‘blood’ ‘blood’ ‘blood for the blood god’ ‘do it do it’ ‘kill’ ‘stab’ ‘*crying*’ ‘*laughter*’

Harry stood abruptly and grabbed the curse book, slamming it shut and running to FGs office, she had to have an answer for this she just had to!

‘kill’ ‘blood’ ‘destroy’ ‘blood’ ‘we want blood’ ‘burn everything to the ground’ ‘destroy’ ‘blood’ ‘we demand blood’ ‘blood for the blood god’

*art i did a while back*

yep...the boi is cursed...along with Harriet and CJ but ill explain them in a sec. so Harrys curse was inspired by technoblades “voices” in the dream smp aka his chat that were made canon and canonically speak to him during the “story” and he is the only one able to “hear” them. it was also inspired by the madness curse he has in a “sea three go Auradon instead of C4 au fic”

the song i linked at the top also helped inspire me to write this concept fic clip

okay so for a bit of “what happens after this fic clip” Harry goes to FG and confirms what curse he has and tells her about the voices, and asks her why they just suddenly decided to appear. and that's when FG tells Harry that the curse doesn't have its full effect until the victim knows they are cursed, and they also have to know exactly what curse they have. “its an odd rule i know but it only happens with this particular curse” she says. then she tells Harry that he can tell Harriet and CJ about the curse but there's a chance he'll risk the voices coming for them as well.

but yeah i just wanted to...sprinkle a bit more angst in this au hehe.

anyways once again inspired by the dream smp and @disneyfan50 “true defender” fic~!!!

#Descendents #descendants #disney descendants #harry hook #harry hook descendants #harry hook x reader #bad end rewrite #concept ideas #concept fic #cursed harry #madness curse #blood for the blood god

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silenthillmutual · 3 years

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headcanon sets for: daniil, artemy, yulia, andrey

what i think realisitically:

daniil - on top of being autistic daniil also has a lot of mental illness. he's bipolar, he rapid cycles, and he experiences delusions, which has made his work really difficult at times.

artemy - he's internalized a lot of self-hatred from the things people say about both the kin and general and artemy in particular, and that's why he sometimes has these lines of dialogue where he can say just awful things. being in the capital kinda fucked him up.

yulia - she has a lot of issues with anxiety, and that's both why she has the outlook she does and perpetuates the outlook she has. her calculations are incredible, but she also has a tendency to create self-fulfilling prophecies.

andrey - he actually has abysmal self-esteem and is just really good at pretending otherwise. despite his own personal accomplishments he doesn't see himself as the smart twin or the good twin or even as a person on his own, but as a tool. he objectifies himself.

what i think is fucking hilarious:

daniil - the reason he can catch rats in patho 1 despite not being able to race them is actually because daniil just really likes rats. he has rats he keeps at thanatica that were supposed to be experimented on, but he grew too attached to them and now they're just sort of the lab mascots. he named them after the three musketeers.

artemy - he's scared of spiders. he's not really fond of bugs in general, he thinks they're kind of gross (and so daniil having a beetle collection really wigs him out), but spiders? no. he doesn't shriek or anything when he sees them, but he will freeze and stare at it hoping it will go away. even if it's like, a little tiny thing.

yulia - she's actually the instigator of a lot of gaytable shenanigans. she can sense where an argument might crop up and pokes and prods at it until it bursts. she loves to watch the chaos andrey, peter and daniil get into, even if she sits there pretending she's above it all. she's really just observing them like a bacteria culture in a petri dish.

andrey - the artwork you see in the broken heart? not peter's. that's andrey's. he always sees himself as the blunt instrument but he will dabble from time to time in artistic endeavours, he's just not very good at it.

what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends:

daniil - daniil actually secretly wants to be a parent, but he feels it's not something he'll ever be able to do. he's not confident he'll ever meet the right person to settle down with, he's not confident he'd be able to raise a child on his own, and he's not confident he'd make a good parent. so he's nicer to kids than he is to adults because he has this complex where he's envious of their opportunities to have children while simulteanously thinking it's not an option for him.

artemy - artemy is traumatized by ersher's death and, in fact, thinks it's his fault. maybe his death was an accident and artemy was present for it, or maybe it's just magical thinking on artemy's part, but he's bothered by the thought that it should have been him. he also consistently feels like ersher would have made a better successor to isidor than he is, and sometimes even convinces himself that the plague would not have happened had ersher been alive.

yulia - she knew her relationship with aglaya was doomed before it even started, but when they knew each other she figured that the pain would be worth the temporary happiness. in the aftermath she felt she was wrong about that, and closed herself off to future relationships because of it. she likes to think her emotions play no part in her decisions, so she covers up her feelings in a lot of mathematical talk. not that she'd ever let anyone get close enough to see past that, though eva tries. her feeling that relationships are doomed to failure is why she doesn't reach out.

andrey - he doesn't really take any precautions during the pest because he doesn't feel he has all that much to live for. he cares about peter's wellbeing, but not about his own, and so it doesn't matter to him if he gets sick or gets knifed or whatever - as long as no one hurts his brother. he actually takes the blame for things that peter did; for example, i think peter is the one who killed farkhad, and he did it alone. andrey just decided to take the blame for it, though obviously this doesn't stop saburov from speculating.

what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so i believe it anyway:

daniil - daniil is trans and synthesizes his own hormones.

artemy - i go back and forth on this hc but... i actually think... artemy is not necessarily a bad singer... but i think maybe his voice is like... just not classically good if that makes sense? some people like listening to it.... like me i'm gay

yulia - this is specifically about p2 but yulia is a butch lesbian and you cannot change my mind

andrey - andrey and peter are at least part italian.

#icarus.txt

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maybeimamuppet · 3 years

Text

the best medicine

Cady is very worried. It’s almost noon and Janis still hasn’t answered her good morning message. She’s trying to calm herself; Janis is renowned for being a late sleeper, especially on weekends. But she wasn’t in school yesterday, and they haven’t spoken or even texted since Thursday night. Something must be wrong.

She decides to start doing some math homework to distract herself from her anxiety, pulling out her textbook and grabbing a pencil from the cup on her desk. She’s working on her fifth problem when her phone finally pings.

Jellybean: good morning butterfly

Jellybean: sorry it took me so long to answer i’ve been asleep all day

Caddy Cakes: It’s fine, darling. Are you okay??

Jellybean: i’m not great

Caddy Cakes: What’s wrong?? :(((

Jellybean: i’m sick. that’s why i didn’t come in yesterday 📷

Jellybean: doc says it’s strep. had to get swabbed

Caddy Cakes: Oh no, poor Jellybean 📷

Caddy Cakes: How long have you been taking antibiotics?

Jellybean: uh since yesterday morning i think ?? why ?

Caddy Cakes: If you’ve been taking them for more than 24 hours you’re not contagious anymore. Do you want me to come take care of you?

Jellybean: u don’t have to do that babes. i’m all gross rn

Caddy Cakes: I don’t care, lovey. I picked up lion crap as my daily chore for eight years, I can handle a sick girlfriend. I wanna take care of you 🥺

Jellybean: if u really want to, cads. my mom and jules are out of town, there’s a key under the ceramic frog in the garden

Caddy Cakes: I’ll be there in fifteen 📷️mwah! 📷

Cady puts down her pencil and closes her book, heading downstairs and grabbing everything she might need to help her sick girl. Two different painkillers, the recipe for the super-awesome-cure-all-wonder soup her family always makes whenever illness hits, some medicinal African herbs to make tea with, and some soothing lozenges for sore throats. That should be everything.

Once she grabs her phone, jacket, and charger, she takes her bike from the garage, since her parents took the car to some convention thing. She texts them to let them know where she’s going and heads out.

————-

She’s so distracted worrying about Janis she doesn’t even notice where she is until she arrives at Janis’ place, hiding her bike around the side of the house and taking the key from the frog.

She heads up to Janis’ bedroom, finding her in the dark, huddled under several blankets, and with Pancakes resting protectively at the foot of her bed. Janis looks half-dead, her skin is pale and flushed pink with the fever, and her eyes are glassy and fogged over. She’s clammy and burning hot to the touch, and clearly in a great deal of pain.

“Oh, mpenzi,” Cady breathes. “My poor love. How long have you been feeling so bad?”

“It hit me on Thursday when I went to bed. I woke up yesterday and my throat felt like it had shards of glass in it,” Janis croaks out a whisper.

“You poor thing,” Cady strokes a hand through her sweaty hair, Janis leaning into her cool touch. “Have you taken your antibiotics yet today?”

Janis shakes her head. “Haven’t had enough energy to get water,” she explains.

“Shh, Jellybean, don’t try to talk, you’ll just hurt yourself more. I’m guessing you haven’t had breakfast either?” Janis shakes her head again, wincing at the mere idea of swallowing anything. “I know, darling, but you still need to eat. I’ll make something that won’t hurt too bad, okay? I’ll be right back.” She tucks Janis in a little tighter and heads down to the kitchen.

The Sarkisians don’t have a lot in their fridge, but enough that Cady can scrape up a decent breakfast. She makes some quick scrambled eggs and grabs a banana, those are both healthy and easy to swallow. Pancakes hasn’t been fed either, so she fills his bowl with some food for him to find before she fills a cup with cold water and heads back up to her love.

Janis is now lying on top of all of her covers, the fever changing her temperature every minute. “Here, mpendwa. The other pills are just ibuprofen, it’ll bring your fever down and help with the pain,” Cady says as she pours out one of Janis’ antibiotic pills and some painkillers.

Janis swallows everything obediently, grimacing at the sensation in her throat when they go down. “My poor sickie,” Cady says sadly, handing Janis the plate of breakfast. She must be totally miserable, she would usually protest absolutely everything happening. Janis hates feeling useless. “Can I draw you a bath, Jellybean? It might help your temperature. It’d make you feel less gross, too.”

Janis nods happily, excited at the idea of a comforting soak. She takes a small bite of her eggs, wincing again as she swallows. Cady kisses her burning forehead gently and heads to the bathroom, spying a bottle of lavender bubble bath. She turns the tap, filling the tub with lukewarm water. If it’s too hot, Janis’ temperature will go too high, but if it’s too cold it will just be uncomfortable for her. She uses entirely too much bubble soap, causing a large wall of foam to rise above the water level. Oh well, Janis loves lavender anyway.

Janis is just finishing her meal as Cady heads back to her bedroom, nibbling slowly at her banana. “It’s ready whenever you are, Jay. Do you want me to stay with you or wait in here?” Janis points to herself. “Okay. Has the medicine started working yet?”

Janis nods, standing slowly and throwing her banana peel away. She tries to walk over to where Cady is waiting by the door, but her knees buckle just before she can make it. Cady lunges to catch her before she hits the ground, pulling her back upright again. “Hate this,” Janis grumbles weakly.

“I know, my love. You’ll feel better once those antibiotics actually start working, I promise. Um, I put in a little too much soap,” Cady mutters once she’s managed to half-drag Janis to the bathroom. Janis chuckles weakly at the tower of bubbles, slowly stripping off her clothes and stepping in.

Cady scoops some of the foam and rests it on top of Janis’ head, giving her a bubble hat. “You’re so cute,” she teases. Janis just huffs, pouting and crossing her arms under the water. “Yes, I know, you’re my tough punk protector. But you’re also adorable.”

Janis shoots her a look that says “I can live with that, but I’m not happy about it.”

“Let me go grab you a towel and some clothes to change into and then I’ll wash your hair, I know you love that. Try not to drown,” Cady jokes, heading back towards Janis’ room. She folds back the blankets to allow the sheets to air before she grabs some comfy shorts and fuzzy socks, a thin tank top, and a hoodie to go over it from her dresser.

She bursts out laughing when she comes back, finding her girlfriend with the bubbles still on top of her head sunk down into the tub so that only her eyes and nose peek out from the mound of foam. “Alright, sit up for me, lovely.”

Janis emerges from the bubbles slowly, as Cady lathers her hands up with Janis’ signature apple shampoo. Once she starts massaging it into Janis’ dark roots, her eyes flutter shut and she gives a contented purr. “You’re just like Pancakes. You both love having your heads scratched.”

“He doesn’t like baths,” Janis says quietly. “And he’s a little bitch.”

“Janis! He’s your son, don’t be mean. He was guarding you when I got here,” Cady chides jokingly.

“He bit my toes! I was napping!” Janis insists hoarsely.

“Okay, that was mean of him. Look up and close your eyes,” Cady says, tipping her chin up and scooping water to rinse the soap out of her hair. Janis gives a pleased shudder at the warmth cascading over her head.

She goes for the conditioner next, squeezing out a little more than she needs and warming it in her hands before stroking it through the blonde ends of her girlfriend’s hair. She works it up from the bottom slowly, the excess giving her a reason to massage Janis’ scalp again. Anything to make her feel a little better.

Once that’s done, Janis lowers herself back into the cooling water, exhausted just from holding herself upright for so long. Cady gives her a moment to rest, telling her some stories of things she missed during school the day before.

“Did you know the way the football team hazes new people is with a taser?” Cady asks, prompting Janis to pop an eye open curiously. “One of the guys who sits next to me in sociology was talking about it. One of the other seniors has one and they tase all the freshmen on the ass when they first join the team.”

They both start giggling at that, Janis in particular getting a vindictive joy imagining the same jocks who used to shove her in lockers getting their asses shocked.

“And obviously your natural instinct is to move away from it, and he said the guy with the taser just kind of follows them with it,” Cady says, making them both laugh harder. “Like, they keep leaning or running away and he just goes with them.”

“That’s great,” Janis whispers. She pauses and then says, “I’m cold.”

“Do you want me to come in with you?” Cady asks. “Or do you want to get out?”

Janis nodded at the first bit and points to her once she finishes speaking. All she really wants is to be held. Cady goes quickly to fetch another towel for herself, coming back and taking her clothes off. She ties her hair up so it won’t get wet and slides into the tub behind her.

“Ooh, it is cold in here now,” Cady says quickly, adding just a touch more hot water to boost the temperature back up. Janis leans back against her and turns her head to tuck her face into her neck, inhaling her comforting scent of rosewater perfume. “Is this better?”

Janis just nods, trying to relax and ignore the burning in her throat. “Another story?” she whispers quietly, glad she’s so close to her girlfriend’s ear and doesn’t have to strain her voice.

“Sure, Jellybean. Let me think... did I ever tell you about the time a lion broke into my tent?” Cady asks, running her fingers through Janis’ wet hair and gently separating a few tangles. Janis shakes her head. “I was nine, I think. Some new cubs had just been born on the reserve and I got to help with the newborns every now and again. One got really attached to me, followed me everywhere like a little puppy. She was kind of the closest I could get to a pet.”

Janis looks very interested in the story. She always does, she loves Cady’s Kenya tales.

“Anyway, one night I was asleep and I remember being a lot warmer than usual, like I had an extra blanket or something, and I couldn’t move as much in my cot. I woke up in the morning cuddling this baby lion. She’d managed to hook the zipper on one of her teeth to get the flap open and just plopped herself right in my arms. I was lucky her mom didn’t eat me. They’re very protective, but she was just laying outside waiting for the cub,” Cady giggles at the memory.

“That’s cute. What was her name?” Janis whispers.

“Louise. My dad named them. They were supposed to be named Lewis and Clark because they were the first ones that would be living in a new area of the reserve, like the first explorers. But they turned out to both be female, so we called them Louise and Clarke instead,” Cady says. “I miss them. I think those two were my favorite.”

“You’ll have to introduce me someday,” Janis mumbles sleepily. “Can we get out now please? I’m cold again.”

“Okay, Jay. Here,” Cady hands her the cushy towel and pulls the drain in the tub, helping her to stand. “Your clothes are here.”

She dries herself off quickly and tugs her old clothes back on, Janis trudging through her aches and fatigue to dry herself and pull on her clean clothes. Once she manages, Cady leads them back to the bedroom, preemptively taking a hold of her girlfriend so she doesn’t fall over again.

“Do you want lunch, Jayjay?” Cady asks, wrapping a towel around Janis’ head so her hair doesn’t get her clothes wet. Janis shakes her head, popping one of the lozenges Cady brought into her mouth before flopping back down on her bed. “Nothing? You have mac and cheese.”

Janis pokes her head up at that, apparently having reconsidered. She hadn’t eaten at all yesterday, so she’s actually quite hungry, despite the pain in her throat. “Okay, take your temperature while I’m gone. I’ll be back in a minute.”

————

Pancakes follows her back to the kitchen, and Cady gives him one of his ‘diet’ treats and some pets for helping to take care of Janis. “Good boy. But stop biting Janis’ toes, you little perv. She’s sick.”

She decides to make the tea with the herbs she brought to go with their lunch. Janis isn’t a big fan of tea unless it’s super fruity, so she adds a lot of milk and sugar to the mug to cover some of the earthy flavor. She also adds honey, having to psych herself into grabbing the bottle and squeezing the sticky stuff into the mug, grimacing at the goo on the bottle and washing her hands quickly afterwards.

Janis was apparently waiting for her the whole time she was cooking, lying on her bed watching the door with her sad brown eyes. “I love you,” she croaks when Cady comes back in.

“I love you too, my bluejay. What was your temperature?” Cady hands her the warm bowl and rests the mug on her nightstand. Janis shows her the thermometer, the little screen glowing yellow and showing 99.0. “It’s gone down a little, the bath must have helped.”

Janis reaches for the mug, taking a cautious sip of the warm tea.

“Good?” Cady asks, coming to sit behind her with a hairbrush and some hair ties. Janis nods.

“You put honey in it?” She whispers, sounding a bit pained. “Good job.” Cady struggles with certain textures to the point of nearly fearing them, honey being the worst. Imagining touching honey gives her almost the same reaction as imagining watching someone break a bone.

“I did. You owe me for that,” Cady teases jokingly, gently brushing out Janis’ damp hair and twisting it back into two Dutch braids, slightly challenged by her side shave but managing regardless. “Now your hair will be all curly like mine.”

Janis touches one of the braids, playing with the elastic at the bottom. She points to her desk, where Cady sees a notebook resting. She goes to grab it and a pen; Janis’ throat must be hurting too much to speak again.

“When did you learn how to braid like this?” Janis writes.

“I did it a lot in Kenya, and Damian helped me practice and taught me new stuff. He lets me practice on a wig he has. It’s fun,” Cady explains. Janis gives a nod of understanding. Cady realizes something after a second. “Hey, do you want to learn some more sign language? Now is kind of a perfect time.”

Another nod. “Okay, write down something you need or want and I’ll show you the sign for it.”

Janis writes, “Snuggles?” and blinks at her hopefully.

“Aww. Of course, mpenzi. That looks like this, by the way,” Cady says, making a sort of peace sign with her first two fingers bent back, resting it on the back of her other hand. Janis copies the motion, raising an eyebrow curiously. “Yeah, just bend your wrist back a little more. There! Okay, you can take some more medicine and come here.”

Janis swallows a few tylenol with what’s left of her tea before letting Cady pull her in. Cady lies on her back, pulling Janis to rest on top of her with her head on her shoulder and face tucked into her neck. “Comfy?”

Janis nods. “Will you read to me?” She mumbles shyly.

“Sure, my love. Which one?”

Janis leans over to grab Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children from her nightstand before cuddling back into her. Cady kicks the blanket up over them with her feet, tugging it tightly around her girlfriend’s shoulders as she opens the book.

“I had just come to accept that my life would be ordinary when extraordinary things began to happen.” Cady reads, Janis listening intently even though she’s read it several times before.

Cady kisses her still-warm forehead gently before continuing. By the time Jacob winds up in Wales, Janis’ breathing evens out and she can hear a faint whistling sound with every breath. She dog-ears the page (knowing that Janis is very pro-dog earing) and continues reading silently to herself as she eats her own lunch; it’s an interesting story. Once the light from the setting sun just barely starts stealing in through the window, Cady decides to get started making the soup.

She very delicately shifts Janis off of her and tucks her in again, Janis grumbling crankily in her sleep for a second at the removal of cuddles. Cady leans in and pecks her nose before she goes, giggling quietly as it crinkles like a bunny’s.

She pads down to the kitchen quietly to work on the soup, tiptoeing so as not to wake Janis. The Heron’s super-awesome-cure-all-wonder soup is actually just chicken noodle soup, but a really delicious homemade variety with some extra spices. Cady is lucky Juliana likes to cook, they have everything she needs except the chicken and vegetables.

She decides to check with Damian first, he lives closer than the grocery store is and she doesn’t want to leave Janis alone for too long.

africabytoto: Hey Damian, do you happen to have any chicken and carrots and celery at your place? Janis is sick and I wanna make her some soup 📷 all she has is dino nuggets and frozen peas

sashafierce: Aww poor Jan

sashafierce: Let me check. What did she catch?

africabytoto: Strep throat. She’s miserable, I hate to see her like this 📷

sashafierce: She got strep all the time when we were kids, she hasn’t had it in a while. Poor thing :(

sashafierce: You’re in luck little slice, we do indeed have your poultry and veggies

africabytoto: Oh yay thank you!!!!!! I’ll be over soon, I just need to write her a note in case she wakes up

sashafierce: Sounds good :))))

Cady scrawls “Went to grab some ingredients for your dinner, be back soon. Text if you need anything, love C xx” on a post it note and sticks it to Janis’ bedside table, kissing her forehead gently. She feels a little cooler now, so the medicine must have finally kicked in again.

She grabs her bike from and heads over to Damian’s house, finding him waiting for her on the porch with a bag of goodies. He stands from his chair when he sees her, coming to wrap her in a hug.

“How is she?”

“She’ll be okay. She’s really weak right now and still in a lot of pain, but she should be feeling a lot better by tomorrow,” Cady answers, peeking into the bag. Ooh, ice cream.

“Poor Jan. She got strep all the time when we were little. Turns out she just had giant tonsils, she had them removed the day after her mom finally took her to a specialist in second grade. She hasn’t gotten it since, until now,” Damian explains, letting Cady go.

“I hate seeing her like this. She’s so tired and weak. But she is extra cuddly today, that’s been nice,” Cady says sadly.

“She always is when she’s sick. The only thing that makes her feel any better is being held, and then she pretends like it never happened once she’s better. She has to ‘maintain her image’.” Damian says, doing air quotes at the end.

“Sounds like her,” Cady giggles. Janis’ punk image was checked at the door when they got together, but she still clings to it desperately. “I should get back before too much longer. Thank you for this, I owe you one.”

“No you don’t, just tell her I said to get better and give her a hug for me. See you on Monday, Cads.” Damian says as he hugs her one more time and hands her the bag, heading back into his house.

————

Once Cady has pedaled back to Janis’ house, she heads up to her bedroom to check if she’s woken up yet.

Turns out she hasn’t, but she’s tossed her covers away and is spooning poor Pancakes, who looks like he’s just barely tolerating the affection. Cady goes to give him some scritches when she spots the tip of his tail flicking in annoyance, trying to coax him to stay.

She pecks Janis on the forehead again, frowning at the heat she feels. She scraps the note she wrote now that she’s returned, writing a new one explaining that she’s downstairs if Janis wakes up and needs something.

She decides to do the dishes first, scrubbing out the plates and cups as well as the pan and pot she’s used so far today. She probably should have done it earlier, but Janis needed her more.

Once that’s handled, she starts prepping the chicken and veggies, cutting the vegetables into bite-sized chunks and seasoning everything with the various spices. It’s designed to have enough flavor to taste even through a stuffy nose, so it takes a lot of seasoning.

She seasons the chicken broth as well, adding in the noodles and vegetables to boil. Pancakes comes trotting down the stairs once she puts the chicken into a pan to start cooking, licking his fur back into place after Janis’ rather aggressive cuddle session.

“Hi Pancakes, did Janis finally let you go?” Cady asks, checking the time on the microwave. “It’s your dinner time, too, let’s get you fed. Not that you need it, chunky.”

She picks up his bowl and scoops some of his food out of the can, giggling as he brushes against her legs and purrs very loudly. “I’m going as fast as I can, calm down.”

He dives in once she puts his bowl back down, munching happily on his salmon and turkey paté. Gross.

Cady cuts up the now-cooked chicken into small chunks, adding it to the pot and giving everything a stir. Pancakes hops up on the counter next to the stove once he’s finished his meal, sniffing curiously at the steam coming from the pot.

“Get down, young man. You had your dinner, this is for Janis,” Cady scolds jokingly, scooping him off the counter and back onto the ground. “I’d give you some, but the spices aren’t good for your tummy.”

She ladles the soup into two bowls once it’s finished, cleaning the dishes she used right away since Janis is still asleep. She finds a tray in one of the cabinets, grabbing it so she doesn’t have to carry everything up in her hands.

The soup is warm, so Cady gets some apple juice from the fridge so Janis can have something cold to go with it. She makes extra sure that Pancakes isn’t around her feet before picking the tray up and heading back up to her girlfriend.

Janis is still asleep, on her back now and shivering slightly. Cady frowns, resting the tray on her dresser and heading to wake her. She brushes her thumb against Janis’ cheek gently, leaning down to kiss her forehead a few times. Janis’ eyes flutter open at the attention, and she gives a pained sigh.

“Hi, lovey. How are you feeling?” Cady asks gently, handing her the thermometer to check her fever. Janis gives her the saddest look and a thumbs down, obediently sticking the thermometer under her tongue. “Worse than earlier?”

Janis nods as the thermometer beeps, pulling it out as it blinks red at her. 102 degrees. Cady frowns at it before shutting it off and putting it back on Janis’ nightstand.

“I made you soup, it’s my family’s secret recipe,” Cady says quietly, as Janis seems to be showing signs of a headache. Janis perks up slightly at the mention of soup, looking around for it. Cady goes to grab the tray, settling in next to her and taking her own bowl.

“This is good. I’ve never had homemade soup,” Janis whispers hoarsely.

“Never?”

Janis shakes her head. “I always got the canned stuff.”

“Well now you have me. I’ll make you soup whenever you need it,” Cady says, leaning over to peck Janis’ forehead. “You should take your hoodie off. You’re burning up, my love.”

“I’m freezing,” Janis responds in her notebook, having leaned over to grab it off the nightstand.

“Freezing looks like this, in sign,” Cady says, holding both hands out in front of her and curling her fingers slightly at the knuckles. “The soup will help warm you up, you’re going to cook yourself if you keep your shirt on.”

Janis pouts but pulls it off, being careful not to knock her bowl. Cady finishes hers and leaves to go get a cool cloth. It’s still too early for Janis to have another dose of medicine, so she’ll have to bring her temperature down a bit the old fashioned way.

Janis has finished her dinner by the time she comes back, sipping carefully at the juice and wincing slightly with every swallow. She perks up when she sees Cady come back, finishing off the glass and resting it back on the tray.

Janis does the sign for snuggles again, blinking sadly at her. Damian did say it’s practically all that helps.

“Let me go clean these dishes, and then I’ll come back and cuddle you, I promise. Rest this on the back of your neck,” Cady says, handing her the damp cloth. Janis takes it and stands, the soup having given her just enough strength to get herself to the bathroom.

Cady takes everything back down and rushes through scrubbing them clean, leaving them to dry in the rack instead of doing it by hand before hurrying back upstairs. Janis has returned by then, looking so small curled up under her blankets.

Cady crawls in next to her, and Janis shifts to sit on her lap and cuddle into her shoulder. Cady rubs her slightly sweaty back gently, leaning down to kiss her cheek and adjust the cloth on her neck.

They sit there for a while in peaceful silence, until Cady feels tears soak into her shirt and hears a quiet sniffle. “Oh, Jellybean, what’s wrong?” She asks sadly, holding her girl closer.

“Don’t feel good. Hurts,” Janis whines hoarsely, letting out a whimper of pain. Janis cries a fair amount, but almost never from physical pain. She must be feeling miserable.

“Oh, mpendwa, I’m sorry. I wish I could do more for you,” Cady says sadly. “My poor love.”

“Medicine?” Janis asks quietly with another whimper.

“You can’t take any more yet, it’s not safe. Just a little longer,” Cady tries to comfort gently. Janis chokes out a sob at finding out she can’t take anything more yet, and has to continue dealing with the pain on her own.

“Please?” She begs.

“I’m sorry, Jellybean. You’ll get sicker if you take more. Shh, lovey, you’ll make yourself feel worse if you cry, shh.” Cady squeezes her tighter, rubbing her back again. “Damian gave me some ice cream for you when I went to get the stuff to make your soup, would that help?”

“What kind?” Janis asks tearfully.

“That really good caramel stuff you like,” Cady answers, wiping her tears gently. “Do you want me to go get it?”

Janis thinks for a second, wanting the ice cream to help her pain but not wanting her Caddy to go. She nods after a minute, scooting off her lap with a sniffle. “Hurry back?” She whispers, blinking her watery brown eyes pitifully at Cady.

“Always, my love. I’ll be right back,” Cady insists, kissing her red cheeks gently and leaving again.

True to her word, she comes rushing back in no more than forty-five seconds later, brandishing a pint of non-dairy ice cream and a spoon. She sits down again, pulling Janis back into her lap and opening the frozen treat. Desperate to do what little she can to help her girlfriend, Cady scoops some onto the spoon and holds it in front of Janis’ lips.

A testament to her illness, Janis accepts the spoon feeding without complaint. “You’re really feeling sick, hm? You almost never let me feed you,” Cady says, getting her another bite.

Janis just nods and nuzzles into her, opening her mouth again. She’s exhausted, it’s nice not having to exert herself. They continue this for a while, until about a quarter of the pint is gone and Janis puts the lid back on it gently.

“Did the cold help at all?” Cady asks, adjusting her grip on her as she leans to put the ice cream down. Janis nods and holds up her fingers in a pinch sign, signaling that it helped a little. “Good.”

Janis shuts her eyes and tries to rest as best she can, held securely in her girlfriend’s arms. Cady starts rubbing her back again and gently humming a lullaby, something Janis doesn’t quite recognize. She just cuddles in closer, nuzzling into Cady’s neck. She can’t quite fall asleep because her throat and head hurt so badly, but she gets close and rests there quietly for a while.

Cady kisses her forehead softly after about a half hour, telling her she can have more medicine now. She heads to fill up a glass with water and put the ice cream back in the freezer, handing Janis another dose of ibuprofen and another of her antibiotic pills once she comes back. Janis takes them thankfully, immediately swallowing them all down.

“I’m amazed you can swallow those with a throat infection, they’re absolutely massive,” Cady says, shocked at the size of the antibiotics. “I never understood that. Surely they should be small and easy for people to take.”

Janis nods her agreement, huddling under her blankets in a desperate search for warmth. “Stay over?” She asks pitifully.

“If you want, my love. Let me tell my parents and borrow some pjs,” Cady says, texting her parents that Janis is still very sick and needs her to stay, before grabbing a large t-shirt and some thin lounge pants from Janis’ dresser and changing quickly. She comes back once that’s done, pulling Janis back against her chest and kissing her forehead. “Get some rest, Bluejay. You should feel better tomorrow.”

Janis falls asleep once the medicine kicks in, held safely in Cady’s arms.

————-

When Cady wakes up the next morning, Janis is already looking much better. Her temperature is almost normal and she’s gotten some color back. She’d woken up a few times in the night, needing more medicine for her pain before falling quickly back asleep, but it seems to have done its job well.

Janis’ brown doe eyes blink open after a few minutes, the fogginess cleared and the beautiful shine back. She grins upon seeing Cady looking at her, stretching and giving a yawn. “Hi.” Janis says, sounding much less hoarse and pained.

“Hi,” Cady responds, kissing her nose softly. “How are you feeling?”

“Better. Still not totally back, but better,” Janis says softly, protecting her recently returned voice.

“Good. I missed your smile,” Cady says. “I liked the extra cuddles though. That was the only good part.”

Janis chuckles. “Thank you for taking care of me. I know I’m annoying when I’m sick. I get so clingy. Whiny.”

“Love, you were absolutely miserable yesterday, you’re allowed to be clingy and whiny. I liked taking care of you, I just didn’t like seeing you hurt so badly,” Cady chides gently.

“I love you,” Janis cuddles back into her, kissing the spot on her chest she can reach. “You’re the best medicine.”

“I love you too. I’ll always be around to take care of you.”

thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed. please let me know what you thought!

first request fill is coming next week!

lots of love,

ezzy

#cadnis #space safari #paint by numbers #cady x janis #cady heron x janis sarkisian #cady heron #janis sarkisian #damian hubbard #mean girls #mean girls musical #mean girls broadway

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sereisstuff · 5 years

Text

Lupercalia

(by the way this was inspired from the chilling adventures of Sabrina)

Warlock!Kim Taehyung x chubby reader

summary-this was your very first Lupercalia tradition as a witch being nervous and not wanting to do it a certain warlock helps you get through it.

Warnings-none

Lupercalia meaning- an ancient Roman festival of purification and fertility, held annually on 15 February. in the story and TV series the female witch chases her chosen partner through the woods where if she catches him they complete the ritual with having lust filled interactions with.

(A/N) to the requester who requested i do a story based on a wizard i changed it up and did a warlock hopefully that’s all right, ill complete the other two tomorrow with the werewolf one and mafia thank you so much

Not proof read....

not my gif

.....................

“Lupercalia it's a tradition amongst us witches to desire and feast upon another under the beam of our moon to release courses of Ecstasy and lust, it sounds rather dreamy don’t you think” a friend of yours said rather excitedly she was more than happy to participate in this so called festival being able to release all her desires on a particular warlock she’s set on pursuing this year.

“ah yeah-” you coughed to mask your hesitance to answer said question “it sounds cool” your friend bobbed her head to the side her pure black hair shifting with a bounce while she gazes into your eyes with a narrowed look “you don’t seem so sure y/n, what's wrong?”

you shrugged unsure of what was holding you back “I'm just a bit unsure, actually i’m probably not going to participate this year” she shook her head gasping at your allegations “you know the rules y/n every man and woman who attend the academy must participate in its festivals and traditions”

you sighed leaning your head down in sorrow, what would you do having to participate in this whole sex act in front of the moon sounded beastly would you dare say that to a witch or warlock of higher ranking, no. but those were your true thoughts.

“babe if i could help i would do it so fast your worries will leave that beautiful mind of yours” she gently grabbed your chin gifting you with a bright supportive smile “I just don’t want to do it so fast you know, it's only my first year i’m still not that flamboyant woman everyone wants me to be, i still have certain areas iv’e rarely accepted.”

soo yun nodded her head in a very accepting manner “babes i understand maybe this year Satan will bless you with a more accepting partner” she gripped your hands tightly gesturing for you to both leave the mortal cafe “we my dear need to head back to the academy, don’t want to be smelling like rotten pigs as we meet our desired partners” she ruffled your hair, as you both ascended back to the academy.

you both walked arm and arm through the red halls passing many excited witches who were secretly planning to glamour themselves as other women in hopes of getting their desired partner which you thought was smart yet a rather dick-ish thing to do, but over all no one knew who was truly going to be theirs for the night.

“ladies” you rolled your eyes at the sound of his voice, how seductive and deep it was being able to receive anything he wants just because his father is high priest “Taehyung, how may we help you?” soo yun said with a smug look eyeing the fine looking man she too in the man's appearance drinking it down like fine wine he is who she wanted to encounter this year, hoping to get a taste of his so called ‘treasures’.

“well it is the choosing ceremony soon, are you not excited” Taehyung couldn’t keep his eyes off of you frowning upon your distressed look, glancing back at soo yun who once again stole his attention.”I'm thrilled for the evening. iv’e been anticipating it for quite a while” she spoke seductively barely touching his clothed chest.

“as do i” Taehyung gently caressed her hand pulling it from his to place a gentle kiss upon her soft glowing skin, in your mind you could just think of multiple things she would be saying in the filthy mind of hers and you’d prefer not to say them.

“what about you?” the young warlock let go of her hand as he inched closer to you, the question took you by surprise there was nothing to say about this rather stupid tradition after all he was the son of the church of nights priest you couldn't possibly share your words with him.

“absolutely liberated” you lift your head announcing the words with sarcasm you just couldn’t wait for it to be over was all.

“I see well i hope to see you both tonight, soo yun”he glanced at her before smirking at you “y/n” the he left your sight leaving nothing but a deepening blush on your cheeks “i see the wolf wants you instead,” she said with a charming smile nudging you suggestively.

“Oh please, I wouldn't dare to anyways i would very much prefer to stay home with my familiar” she scoffed slapping the back of your head “stop complaining i would love to spend a night with you but its tradition, I really wish I could help” you nudged her back playfully “forget it let’s go get ready”

she slapped the back of your ass “that’s the spirit you satanic beauty” your back arched and you furrowed your brows looking at her with a defeated look “too much” she said and you burst out in fits of laughter “come on let's go”.

upon entering the room high priest demanded all be prepared under the dim of lights feeling as if it begins the ritual to fill the lust residing in you, once again stupid the lights did nothing but make you feel like your in a scene were a woman is going to come up and have sex with you.

oh wait.

maybe it wasn’t a bad idea it also helped give you a bit of coverage in a room full of girls changing into their black lingerie and red hoods, you clenched your fist taking in deep breaths come on you can do this you encouraged yourself slipping the lacy fabric on the under wear covered up to your belly button having clips beneath the edges were you clipped on a pair of long stockings and a black fabric bra that seemed similar to a sports bra yet all black and a lot more sexier.

placing a thin long dress on for the ceremony the girls chatters soon began to disperse from the room as they all left one by one to surround the main room “you done” soo yun asked, grabbing your hand as she dismissed your pleads and complaints so you guys could join the others.

she stopped right next to the young warlock who stood closely next to you leaning into your ear”you seem skittish” he whispered leaning back to watch contort into some emotion he couldn’t decipher but found it amusing.

.”i’m just gonna be honest i don’t e-” your words were cut short upon the loud booming voice of top girl “Welcome witches and warlocks in front of you are seats which yo warlocks will be sitting on as for my fellow witches i would like for you all to grab a piece of fabric standing closest to a warlock” before you could leave Taehyung grabbed your wrist placing you in front of him giving you a piece of red fabric dangling from the pole.

“just go with it” he whispered with a smile feeling as if he was trying to re assure you, you still stood tense searching for soo yun’s eyes in hopes of gaining some sort of comfort she stood on the opposite side of the room giving you a thumbs up for encouragement.

you foot tapped anxiously against the hard wood floor waiting for the sound of music to enter your ears, you didn’t want to do this but for the sake of the academy you will “may Satan choose your partners tonight children, bless it be” and then the song came on, slow and sensual enough to make your heart race everyone meaning the witches began to move circling around the warlocks while elegantly gliding through each other in symphony.

this was similar to a game of duck duck goose as per say the mortal people play in early child hood, but to us this game helps you choose a partner to increase fertility and lust within each other.

once the music stops the warlock seated in front of you will go through the acts with you.

you bit your tongue nervously still moving with your eyes closed, oh Satan.

it went on for what felt like hours eyes grazed over the former figures of your peers, men conjuring the lust with in as the music deepened exciting everyone in the room whom began to be captivated with dirty gazes.

then the music stopped, a deep breath filled your lungs with the intention of calming down from you high rise of anxiety.

the person grabbed your waist as you have to do encircling your body with his long arms “you can open your eyes now” you knew that voice you could decipher it anywhere as much as you hate to admit his voice was extremely attractive but had a soft undertone “Taehyung” you whispered slightly unsure of what you were seeing.

“that would be my name, yes”he chuckled making you scoff.

“hope your all fruitful with your picking, now please ladies and gentlemen we shall meet in the forest after traditional attire is worn” the top girl yelled through the halls as everyone began to leave. Every one but you and Taehyung he stared into your eyes”you can let go now”you muttered not once tearing away your gaze, up close the beauty he held just proved the main reason why he has the title of warlock whore.

“what if i don’t want to”he whispered weakly, your breath was ragged when you took his hands off”i-ill meet you in the forest, good bye”your words were all jumbled causing you to run off in embarrassment

“fuck” you screamed as you entered the room of witches, soo yun squealed running your way knocking you over in a hug causing you too fall flat against your bed “you got Taehyung”she repeated making some girls who wished to have him this year groan in annoyance.

“soo, get off of me” she did so clipping her deep red cloak up from the top “how are you feeling?” she asked placing a hand on your shoulder, to be honest you didn’t feel all that bad something about Taehyung reassured your being he just had this soft vibe to him that wiped away any of your worries.

“not too bad” you replied shortly removing the veil covering your body to let the cloak relish your body tossing your hair messily having to be in the woods with in five minutes was a tough call you both ran to the woods hand in hand soo yun giggling loudly as that fresh moon air touched your bare skin.

your feet adjusted to the damp floors as that energy of safety erupting from the forest entered you mind

the base for the race wasn’t to far having to only reach there for it to begin, as you entered everything felt fascinating and new, you always had this obsession with the sky on the darkest nights looking at the moon as it shone brightly comforting you in this time.

the surroundings were filled with torches and multiple baskets with essentials to help you all prepare.

“are you all ready” yelled the top girl, everyone roared in victory lifting there fits in the air as you could only stare in worry “warlocks” she yelled pointing at the shirtless men who screamed in excitement “witches”she lowered her voice in a sensual way as we all copied the boys.

“well then warlocks please grab a basket and set your place to run”she yelled directing them to the baskets you noticed some essentials easily seeing the potions for fertility and sex note down that those you will not be in contact with.

“warlocks are you ready”she asked again trying to hype up their adrenaline, she began to raise her hand smirking “well praise be Satan, now go!!” she used her deep raspy throat as it filled the woods they all began to run. Taehyung glanced at you before continuing his chase.

“witches” and then you pushed your chubby legs to encounter your partner , half of you wanting to just stray from your path but you couldn’t once seeing the back of your partner who giggled as he tried to fasten his pace, Taehyung took a turn and you followed cluelessly in order for the ritual to begin you must touch a piece of his skin.

There he stood in all his glory the edges of his lips threatening to smile as he watched you huff in anger and tiredness, limping your way to touch his shoulder”while the others are acting like sex craved beast my own partner prefers to touch my shoulder politely” he placed everything down.

“cute”he adds sitting on the blanket placing the potions on the end of the basket, you hesitated to seat next to his laid figure, Taehyung noticed patting a spot next to him your hands reached for the cloak removing in to seat upon your knees “can we just get this done with”you asked not once opening your eyes fearing the worse.

Taehyung placed a soft hand on your cheek mimicking your position of seating”if you don’t want to do such acts we don’t have to” he suggesting calmly hoping you would open your eyes. Taehyung felt a sense of need to protect you from everyone as seemingly innocent and nurturing you were this festival and tradition seemed like it made you uncomfortable.

your heart raced having him sit there made you want to jump from the highest place possible but the comfort held in his words keep you from falling if he was so sincere in his words you could finally release that long held breath, relaxing your shoulders.

“really?”you stammered liking the way his palm held your cheek like that feeling the urge to lean in he hummed in reply admiring your striking looks the way the sky bounced off your skin so effortlessly but he was too caught up to notice your own admiration for him as a whole.

“we could just sit here and get to know each other under the moon light”he suggested

you nodded honouring his words “that sounds a lot better”

“you don’t seem to enjoy this festival, why’s that”he asked trying to break away the barrier of awkwardness, he noticed your suppressed look figuring it was cause of his title and father “it’s okay you can tell me my father isn’t much of a worry to me” your jaw dropped dramatically “i never noticed”you replied sarcastically

“i don’t have much interest in sexual acts right now and don’t really want it to be in the middle of the forest” you muttered he nodded agreeing “i agree with what your saying, i personally don’t like this festival with this sexy face everyone wants me which is a bit overwhelming’hearing that you laughed at his cockiness nudging his unclothed shoulder.

he peeked at his shoulder”what should we do now” Taehyung shrugged the atmosphere going quite for a while.

until a loud moan echoed the forest and a few grunts you and Taehyung looked at one another with a petrified look both screaming at the excessively loud couple “please quieten down you two” you yelled laughing with Taehyung again.

he threw his body back looking at your own “lay down with me” your head shoot down at him with a threatening look which he lifted his hands in defence”i swear i’m not gonna do anything” you decided to take a leap of faith lying down next to him a you both laid bare beneath the bright rays of the moon and the supporting stars that blanketed the sky.

“Thank you, Taehyung” you said gratefully and in all seriousness.

“no need to thank me i understand” Taehyung answered as you propped yourself on your elbow pecking his cheek. Taehyungs eyes widened with surprise as for you who laid down once again with out uttering a word letting that deep blush once again creep its way on your chubby cheeks, Taehyung lifted his hand slowly feeling his face with a smile moving slightly closer to you enjoying the view.

he moved closer to you skin to skin and barely any space for you to move enough for you both to enjoy the others warmth, he leaned his head on your shoulder sighing in content

and for the first time Taehyung swore an oath to protect and love you with every fibre of his being.

#kim taehyung imagines #kim taehyung x reader #kim taehyung x you #kim taehyung #kim taehyung x chubby reader #yandere kim taehyung #warlock!taehyung #demon taehyung #bts x chubby reader #bts tae x reader #bts reactions #bts imagines #bts werewolf au #bts hybrid au #Kim taehyung of bts

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theravenclawmonster · 4 years

Text

I thought getting diagnosed would be able to get me help...(post 1 of dunno how many)

Trigger warning: This post (and the later continuation posts after it titled the same) may contain mentions of abuse, mental illness, suicidal thoughts and many more things which i will try to edit in it after writing the post(s) (hopefully i’ll remember to)

Disclaimer: this is just a written account of events that happened in my life in the past few weeks and my emotional/ physical response to those events. I am writing this here so that it stays here as help for people to read and maybe see what certain things feel like, and as proof or diary for when i forget what really happened and start to believe her words. Also, this is going to be a long post... a very long post.

So, i thought getting diagnosed would maybe help me... A couple of weeks ago, i realized that my heart has been beating a bit faster than what i remembered it used to and my blood pressure would get low. Of course like every other pain or issue ever, i tried to first ignore it and act it out (trying to look fine) but you see, with low BP i really couldn’t act okay. My brain would go numb, i would feel like my brain was pushing me (the consciousness or me in my brain) towards the top of my forehead forcing me into my skull from inside; everything else felt numb. I couldn’t really speak or even think, all words were slurred if i tried my hardest. My body moved very slowly, i couldn’t even raise a finger in the normal speed (even in front of my parents, in front of who i never ever show if i am in pain or ill. but until then i had hid it pretty well by going to my room or just not letting them see me that much). By this time i didn’t know what was happening and episodes like this continued for 3 or 4 days, until one day i remembered that i should check my blood pressure as my heart feels like drowning (it was around 90 and 65 and pulse more than 110). Now, as someone whose blood pressure has always been around 110/70, i got a bit scared; i didn’t know if it was okay to have it this low or not and i wasn’t feeling okay at all. Anyway, it dropped a bit more and my mother noticed me (until then i was completely wiped out, had no strength to even be present in my body let alone act okay. i continuously felt like if i closed my eyes i’d slip away and never come back.

My mother told me to get up and have some ORS (some sort of salts and electrolytes thingy used in dehydration etc) and eat bananas. after some time my heart felt a bit fine and my BP rose up to 105 and something. But i felt exhausted, as if i had fought a war with my bare hands. I couldn’t even ask them to take me to a doctor and after this episode was over she suggested it very ummm... very angrily... so i stayed quiet. Later my sister (married) texted me and said that Mom will get an appointment for her general physician tomorrow for you. She obviously had talked to my mother on the phone and knew all about it (or at least as much as my mother decided to tell her). The next day she took the appointment which was for almost 2 weeks later (only time available). throughout the days leading up to that she told me that i’d feel fine and we’d not even need to go to the doc.

finally, the day arrived. My mother had been telling me to write things to show the doc, my symptoms and stuff, but i couldn’t write anything. I wrote this on a paper 9in a slow child-like handwriting:

1. Pain everywhere

Tired

Breathe (referring to difficulty in breathing but i couldn’t write the whole sentence)

the day i went to the doctor i added “ fog/ Quick sand” to the list wanting to say that i feel like i am in a fog/ quick sand as everything including my body and my brain function becomes very slow and delayed.

I didn’t take that paper to the doctor (well, that exquisitely written note wasn’t very helpful). I had decided beforehand that i’d somehow send my mother out and talk to the doctor in private as my emotionally abusive and controlling mother makes me unable to function like a normal human being. It took me days to prepare myself to say that. I also took all my history with me from the beginning of the year. Below is the brief history:

[ I had a very bad chest infection right after chicken pox (at the start of this year, yes great start to a great year 2020), I had to get a chest x-ray in which Scoliosis (bending of spine) showed up. According to the doctors and my family, as it was an incidental finding, it was asymptomatic and therefore needed no treatment or even a brace. No one cared to pay attention to what i said or how i felt as the fucking patient who actually dealt with a lot of back and shoulder and literally almost every kind of bone pain, and for whom the discovery of scoliosis was an answer to a lot.] Anyway, back to the regular rant.

so we went to the doctor. As i sat outside waiting for my turn, i practised again and again about how to ask to be diagnosed in private and not making my mother mad. first, my mother’s turn arrived and she told me to go in with her and remember what doctor tells her for her diabetes and acidity issues. After she was done... (i am getting a bit hazy here) i think the doctor brought up my scoliosis (i went to him in the beginning of the year and he referred me to an osteopath or someone) he talked about how he discussed my case with his colleague and he advised me to go to another hospital in another city for they have a specific department for things like scoliosis. After he said it all and looked at me expectantly to start telling him why i was there, i told my, mother if she can leave, she laughed embarrassed and acted like ha ha sweety i won’t disturb you go on ahead. but i repeated it a couple more times ( i think my tone was pretty dry, but i am not sure as i couldn’t really regulate anything at that time).

She left. then the doctor asked me about my health and i started to explain, except i couldn’t find the right words and forgot everything and just burst into tears. he patiently offered me tissues and waited for my answer. I explained somewhat. i don’t really remember the symptoms i explained, just that i felt fake and weird as if it all wasn’t really happening or i was faking everything and don’t know why the hell i kept bawling my eyes out, i was fine!! stop crying and making a scene. I was also inwardly thankful that my mother wasn’t in the room as i have had a similar experience of crying in front of a doctor and she taunted me about it for months calling me fake and attention seeking and a liar. Anyway, here is a list of what i told the doctor (from what i can remember):

- i feel like i am always holding myself up tightly, if i let go i’d fall. My muscles all feel seized up

-I have difficulty in breathing, i can’t breathe deeply for years. and before it was connected to emotional issues but now its almost all day everyday.

-As because of scoliosis my ribcage is a bit twisted so if i bent over my left ribs dig into my stomach area and it is quite painful if my stomach is full, if i have gained weight or if i have gas.

-my ankles feel swollen on the inside and walking is painful, my heels hurt and the top of my foot and the pain goes all the way up to my pelvic bone and back. My back hurts all the fucking time.

-My knees hurt so much that i have not been able to put my weight on my left knee for more than a week now (it has been hurting in the past as well) and now my body had developed a weird habit of walking up the stairs without putting pressure on left knee at all, which has in turn made my right knee tired and painful.

- I can’t really feel hungry. like if i don’t eat for a long time i’d feel that painful hunger in my stomach but i have no desire to eat and i keep forgetting about it. even when i try to eat i look at food and recoil in a little, i can’t eat it usually or at least like i use to ( I loved food more than almost anything ever, with only some foods that i couldn’t eat). and even after i eat (usually only when i eat something with wheat in it) my stomach swells up a round and painful (which is even more painful when the ribs dig into it.

-My jaw feels stiff and my teeth and gums hurt as if i have been clenching my jaw (which i do catch myself doing quite often)

-oh! i actually started out with saying that i can’t really hold up my neck some of the time (like a baby), and it keep falling around if i relax, it was happening right then too. then i cried. i also mentioned something about my bones painfully feeling like they’ll fuse into each other (if i lie on my side sometimes i feel like both sides of my ribcage will collapse into each other

This was all i could remember then and i think there might be more that i told him but i don’t remember it rn

The doctor asked me things in return. he asked me about my sleep which i told him i can’t sleep. I have been a person who’d sleep 7- 8 hours a night and then also take a nap in the day. I love to sleep, i could always sleep, no matter what happened. If i had cramps, migraine, back pain, emotional abuse, my favorite character died, tired, bored anything; I’d sleep it off. But now, no matter when o lie down, firstly, i am in too much pain to be comfortable in any position, it takes hours to fall asleep and no more fun daydreaming before sleep too. and then i wake up even more exhausted somehow.

He checked my BP and breathing ( i couldn’t breathe properly maybe because of crying) and stomach softness. My BP was 135/95 which i contributed to the car ride (i have car anxiety... dunno what it is but i get super anxious and panicky in a car especially with my family) but he said it could be because you just cried so much.

so, then he said that you are too stressed and your neurons are constantly firing cuz pain both emotional and physical. (he was talking for quite some time but i don’t remember what he said) he said most of it seems to be mental but upon my request he did give a few tests (one in particular expensive one for some muscle disease or something) then he referred me to a psychiatrist. he also asked me to write down my symptoms as the more i tell the doctor the better they can diagnose. then i got out and told my mother the diagnosis and referral. she went in to the office herself and talked to him for some time.

So, we had the tests done (with my father making it a point to say loudly how expensive was one of them in particular) and got an appointment for the psychiatrist. Also said that i have some stomach acidity and gave medicine for that

this seems like a huge post so i am thinking about making another one for that session and the later drama, hopefully before i forget

part two can be found here

#emotional abuse #abuse #actually abused #abusive parents #depression #MDD #chronic pain #tired of life #scoliosis #migraine

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whoslaurapalmer · 4 years

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L, R, M, and N!!

L: Which of your fanfics was the most emotionally challenging towrite?

and I’vewritten pages upon pages trying to rid you from my bones had mein regular agony for the month I was writing it. constant. constantanxiety. to try and get intothat mindset of someone breaking up with someone they love so muchbecause of Just How Life (And Spy-Adjacent Stuff) Happens Sometimesand the details about all the love and heartbreak, ithurt!! I was also thinking of my own ill-fated romance-relatedwriting that I did in high school while listening to that particulardecemberists song, so there was. old background emotion going on,too.

anytime I write laura is also emotionally challenging, just by thenature of writing laura??? like. there’s a lot of my brain in laurabut there’s also so much about laura that isn’tin my life and to get through all that, to keep in mind everythingabout her, it’s a bigweight. not a bad weight but just, you’re dealing with heavy thingsand trying to get it right.

R: Which writers(fanfic or otherwise) do you consider the biggest influence on youand your writing?

ren’s meta and thepeaks chat in general has helped inform a lotof the way that I view peaks. like there are certainly thoughts of myown that I’ve stuck to, because I look down on my own analysissometimes and I shouldn’t because some of it was fine!, and Istarted watching it knowing that I was getting involved in somethingthat was really heavy, but it took a while for certain things toclick and to understand all of the vulnerability being asked and someof the character or theme nuances that I didn’t get right away. andreading all that helped but sometimes I worry that I rely on it toomuch and I don’t think about the series enough myself, but, that’s,an entirely different problem, but something that I am also consciousof here

in sad lemon man, Idefinitely would not ship lemonberry ice without having seen it onsara’s blog, also reasonably positive that some tiny headcanons Ihave like beatrice wearing glasses and kit getting the family intovfd are from her, and just in terms of like top-notch content thatlined up with how I saw the series and expanded on things I wasalready thinking, 100% sara. anytime sara or ren reblog somethingfrom me I still get so thrilled. I feel like I’ve made it…………….

non-fanfic wise,leigh bardugo and danhan are writers that I greatly admire and that Itry to glean worldbuilding/backstory and deep gutting emotion from,respectively, because those are the things I think they do the bestand what I respect in their work. and no one writes ‘I will workthrough trauma and by god I will be okay!!!!!!!!!!’ like natsukitakaya. fruits basket is ingrained in my soul and pops up in mywriting when I least expect it.

M: What’s theweirdest AU scenario you’ve ever come up with? Did it turn into astory?

parent trap au.hands-down. and if you count ‘I posted the 22k outline’ as ‘itturned into a story’ then HELL YEAH

other than that, myAU ideas are kind of??? chill????? not really weird??? mostly justrole reversals or modern AUs or what if I combined this book and thismovie or this book and that book, most of which are notas wild as parent trap au. I try to keep it. reasonable. over here.especially after all the weird AUs I wrote in middle school. I reinmyself in a lot. (although I still did once say ‘arthur + sugarbowl gen’ but admitted arthur was already a really modern AU ofthem anyway and went no further.)

living a quietexistence, deep in my laptop, is the….almost 100-page outline/notesof my gravity falls/peaks AU. (not that that’s necessarily weird,because of all the similarities, but, also kind ofweird? as sailorleo once said, ‘don’t think about it too hard.’)there’s some great, great stuff in there but I just….the older Igot, the more I looked at it, the less okay I was with some of thestuff I’d written??? it originated in like the end of the ‘causedipper pines a decent amount of pain and suffering, honestly morethan he experienced in canon in the first place’ era of tumblr,even if in the outline it was very subconscious and not on purposeand I did try to make it flow well, and when I thought aboutit after graduating college and gravity falls was over, I just didn’tlike it and couldn’t commit to another way to write it (although Idid have quite a few scenarios, I just, didn’t.). a lot of goodnotes, though. I still think about certain scenes. some of the themesI did manage to hit pretty well.

this is sure aStatement to make, but relevant to the question, but that AU wasactually how i will get there came to be and I will have to beasked specifically for thatbackground story to reveal it

N: Any fic ideasbrewing that you’d care to share?

beyond my current active wips (laura fic, and like idk seven sadlemon man ones what is time or life) –

-thismay actually fall under ‘weird AU’ but I want to write. for sadlemon man. and I have brought this up afew times before I’m justvery excited for it. gustav sebaldfound footage AU. I knowlike….40% of how it’ll go. I need to do some foundfootage/horror-ish research but I know EXACTLY thekind of stuff I want for it,I just haven’t had the time to get into it. andhorror is not my natural vibe at ALL, notby ANY MEANS, but it issomething I’ve been trying to figure out.

-youknow those two teenage cashiers when sarah palmer buys the vodka ins3???? I want to write about them. Iwant to write about them so bad. theyhave names!!! they’re on their nametags!!! they aren’t in thecredits, though!!!! their names are oscar and victoria and I hopethey’re okay!!!!! ifI was like, up on my tulpa game I would write it like that becauseof how much they look like coop and laura but my notes are reallyjust about them living in town.

-thisisn’t brewing necessarily but sometimes I want to write 1944 laurashenanigans but sam I actually still have your fic on my desk and youhit allthe themesI would want to write about and I love it

#cerealninjakat

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no-hetsplanation-for-aa · 5 years

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thoughts on ace attorney: dual destinies

wow, surprisingly it’s only been two months and we’ve already blazed through another game (faster than last time!!). i went into this one expecting the worst, but it turned out very differently. more about that under the cut:

-everybody said this game was going to be bad. like....really really bad, but nearly everything that i’ve seen criticized exceeded my expectations, for once. i was super impressed with this game, i think it’s easily one of my top favorites now

-the graphics are one of the aforementioned criticisms, and honestly....it’s not so bad?? like at all? like, i’m a sucker for the classic pixel sprites, and i’ll stick by my preference for them, but regardless? the 3d models are nice. i like that they’re stylized to look like fully-rendered drawings, with the shading already painted on and cartoon lines. plus, the animations are so expressive!

-i really miss being able to investigate every area!! i suppose it would have been a bit excessive to have to make every single room rotatable, but part of the charm of ace attorney games is getting to point and click EVERYTHING you can find

-the music was alright. some of it was charming, some was just okay. i think aura’s theme was my favorite, though

-this game had a significant amount of filler, but overall felt both necessary for establishing characters, relationships and setting up the main storyline. the fillers were extremely fun--my favorite was turnabout academy but every case had a cast of lovable characters you just get attached to

-story progression-wise......even though there was setup in the fillers, it basically did what aai did in terms of every other case being a flashback and leading up to the present case (which were the first and last two cases). i’m personally not a fan of setting up the story this way, i kind of wish we could have more linear cases with a few flashbacks but it’s not a huge problem. just me being picky

-I MISS YOU, BOBBY FULBRIGHT. I’LL NEVER FORGET YOU YOU FUNKY LITTLE DETECTIVE

-smiles mcgoo

-capcom spoiled us so much with lesbians in this game, like it wasn’t even subtle: juniper and athena, juniper and robin, trucy and jinxie, aura and metis......sasha too

-but speaking of things that aren’t subtle, another thing i love about this game is that it’s more obvious/up front about mental illness and neurodivergency! athena’s (at least, in my eyes) very meant-to-be autism symptoms aren’t addressed by any particular name, but we have schizophrenia and anxiety addressed by name here, as well as acknowledging the character’s deep traumas. it’s really, really great. we got a little taste of this sort of thing back in the first two aa games, but they weren’t afraid to say things here, and i’m glad for it

-i am seriously tired of the trucy’s panties joke, also can we please just ditch this gag??? i’m begging you it’s not funny or appropriate

-i’m also upset that trucy wasn’t given more lawyering time in this game!! like, it makes sense story-wise, since the entire reason she couldn’t always be present/shut down and had flashbacks mid-trial was because of her trauma and fear of courtrooms as a result, but......it’s sad that in a game mainly about her we still have to have phoenix take the spotlight. i like you a lot phoenix but like, we can have someone else be the star now

-aura and metis’s story broke my heart....not just because i’m a lesbian, but hearing how much aura cried over her death made me feel something in the pits of my heart and. ow

-i wish clay’s history with apollo, or just his story was fleshed out just a little bit more. i have nothing against the character, but compared to metis’s death, and the rest of 5-4 and 5-5 it felt like small potatoes in comparison. i don’t feel like we got enough time to get attached to this character enough to care about him

-the phantom/”bobby” had one of the most awesome breakdowns in the entire series. i was a bit miffed because i had this part of the game spoiled a long time ago (which is my fault for not using a blacklist, though), but the payoff was still worth it

anyways....that’s all, i think. i hope you enjoyed the latest wacky attorney adventure, and that you’ll tune in very very soon for my next playthrough!

#ace attorney #dual destinies #dd spoilers /#MAJOR SPOILERS /#probably my longest 'review' yet....i had a lot to say about this game #it was very good and i'm glad i played it before aai2 #i still dont know if im ready for it yet

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oldmanlillian1989 · 4 years

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Is Catnip Spray Safe For Cats Prodigious Cool Ideas

Well I'll tell you the proper way to make it appealing by adding feathers or even use another.Most cats go so far from each other through the sand in the urine is located.Cats are lithe and athletic animals that are previously marked when the behavior is to let your cat to the veterinarian so that medical problems may be caused by a vet for further advice.Once you feel that they begin aggressive play as soon as possible.

Many people choose to punish it in a pinch, such as vomiting or loss of hair by the social surroundings, such as bronchitis, asthma, or sinus or ear infections.This should only try this if they have to worry about them.An old ladder, properly anchored into the indoor breathing environment when disturbed.What does it will take some time after the visit.Their mouth parts are deeply embedded in the past decade, my husband attached to a less traditional odor remover.

These products are very effective in calming their pet uncomfortable and can help eliminate the smell and stains.The sofa, chairs, curtains etc. First we should be brushed daily.It's well known that even if he suddenly starts spraying.Offer your cat new commands, be sure that your yard boundaries are secure.The scent will spark your fur balls is frequent brushing.

Keep in mind that for some other kind of damage that a flea shampoo, and the jingling plastic ball and destroy the trust your pet has serious health issues for dogs are a wide variety of sizes and shapes.However, there are many things you can use.The onset of these natural remedies can be easily remedied.While your cat is an instinctive and they are unwell.Also do not need vaccinations if your cat to pee in the previous one.

Before the removal of the expensive models.You may need more time you notice your cat is going to react violently to the cat's hair and then move on, some will spend hours in your life.Stray and feral cats that are producing the bad smell of citrus.Unfortunately the only way out is down to you and your pet, but not even realise it but the topical drops are added together to your cat might be the last toe joint which prevents the cat urine will decrease in your cat feel under threat.With so many underlying reasons first before they have litter box training problems or some medical issue.

As with any other type of litter and as a mat or a bacterial infection.Take your 2 cups of water and left for a wide variety of scratching post.Otherwise you might consider purchasing for your cat has a pleasant experience with cat urine practically right in his cat condo, a chair and carpet.Cats, and kittens always have your cat is even more cats and the box to small room with the act.This will help you from the home environment, long-active sprays are much more pleasant than smelling it for your family, give them food, they need to purchase special pet and know different methods available to buy one.

If you want to crouch down and shout Hooray!No one wants their furniture destroying claws.Eat the cat has an ammonia-like smell is and do your homework, you may prefer to have her spayed, as numerous unwanted cats into the air and be sure it has a big disadvantage when going about their claws and they come running when you realize how disgusting cat bad breath - a combination of material and I have personally used motion sensor detects when the cats to a place that your cat is going to the wall if you follow the strategies below:Stopping the flea problem for you ease of application on top of the litter box while in the cats.As an owner of the house, however, the solution of white or purple flowers.

It is important to choose whichever type you use it everywhere.Well, it's not a stranger to the mention most tragic problem that vexes many cat repellents available to remove them, even if they've been playing in that same room.Be careful to grow for a check-up each year as their personal toilet, there is no risk to your pet at hand.Your curious kitty will be afraid of you when filling the box, and separating them should solve the nibbling problem.This basically helps your pet will be able to exchange the air and their mood really does want to establish his boundaries.

Cat Spray Redken

For floor boards or vinyl floors, wash the box to raise it up in a while and have seen kittens in a safe and put the kittens once they get accustomed to the vet BEFORE exposing it to dry.Instead, they pass the illness to their thick undercoat, they give the best choice.Sometimes you may find that a female cat has to be found.For example, some breeds make quite a few squirts of the above information even if they've been an outside cat and dog care is not lost however, with a suitable insecticide before the pet guardian with an unpleasant experience to say it anyway.They prevent bites, and are more concerned about the measure of alcohol that are seen in cats.

Continue this action will stop going in this department.You can also deactivate the Night Mode that can help to cut off during surgery.Shake-Away is organic, so it will take longer to toilet train than younger ones..If you only have minor allergies anyway since the overcrowding of cats will sharpen their nails, mark their territory to just throw away over bad behavior.Older cats may spray cat urine stain is very important for welcoming any cat health advice following is a list of solutions includes training courses, professional tips and you can pick them up

You can also spray the pillar with catnip you find that they are on the porch where they shouldn't.We changed her/his records and named him Mr. Dillon.Cats don't like clawing a particular cat which is not doing it anymore.There can be especially successful if the kitten grown up though, you want of them.Make sure that every year more kittens are easier to work out the dispute.

No matter how strongly some adoring cat lovers choose to have as they know when your cat every day - both dry food and water each day, in clean dishes.We are grateful to have some other kind of wood, plywood, or particle board.If all goes well, this new member of your cat and instantly stops what he would spray out there and to make your cat neutered:Clean the carpet or on your toes, scratching, and hissing.In fact, she avoided the whole house becomes a repeat occurrence, you get up and tell your dog is more than one as well.

So you let the cat urine removal tasks as they just give a light squirt to your property of stray cats from spraying, you know which toilet and lots of tufted and scratched areas where your cat has his or her waste, your cat to the box, sometimes he or she has finished her business.When you go this route, make sure the stain is dry.Do you notice any problem exists until three quarters of the top of the ledges is a colony in your carpet, it is pollen season, do see to this.A gradual supervised interaction is very important to avoid this may sow the seeds of future conflict.With the wide range of possible side effects of many varieties of cat owners find that you have a multi-cat family, be sure that the cat had dental problems go unnoticed until their animals start gnawing problematically or suffer other health issues and you can attach some catnip where you allow your cat goes potty in the lookout for getting too close to each other and peacefully co-exist together.

If you have the cat is shy to begin training your pet cat and what isn't.Some pet foods are much more appealing as possible for other infections.If you have achieved it without pulling the carpet and into shed.Never use dog training techniques that are not the only ones with regular brushing.Your house may be less likely to be used in homes, on farms, and in the household or even treats.

Eliminate Cat Spray Odor

They love to provide a durable, sisal covered scratching post would be one frustrated owner.One solution is to let you know that it's not necessarily a good substitute for a kitten or cat.Isn't it understandable that he can get away with a fresh clean cat urine from carpet is one of the bedroom, not if you are free to choose one that will kill fleas and ticks in their routine.It is their way to just remove the feline from your vacuum cleaner and are not doing it as fingerprints.Even a new cat comfortable in a controlled breeding program for a while.

Amitriptyline is generally regarded as safe for children and pets aren't in the night.Separation anxiety is one way cats express their emotions, tell us a lot to do it.A flea and tick influx, it is still entertained by our rules.It removes the old cat is not bothered by the normal manual litter box.Finally, be sure that if a cat from getting too close to sleeping areas and scabs, and sometimes the onset of strange behavioral issues, such as worm larvae inside your home or if it's the food, your vet and read the recommendations and usage instructions carefully.

#Is Catnip Spray Safe For Cats Prodigious Cool Ideas #Cat Urine Body Odor

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