#before picking me back up

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

No Homo. Just committed to the bit.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #the ‘damn before marriage’ followed by a bridal hoist came to me in a vision at 3am #i scrapped the prev comic and remade it into what you see here #dont worry we will cover the fact lwj admits to knowing wwx is in mxy’s body #I’m sacrificing scenes for the sake of mirth & giggles & pacing #ok lets talk about being carried. because it carries so much weight (aha) #to be carried is to rely on other people. To force them into helping. To make them lose face #thats wwx main argument here! ‘don’t do this for me’. underneath: ‘I’m not worth the burden on your shoulders’ #to which lwj says ‘come here and be a burden (literal: weight) in my arms’ #wwx handles being picked up like a fussy cat. which is to say he complains going up and going down. #but is fully settles once *secure and held* #anyway! cant beleive lwj is doing all of this to get back at all that joke flirting wwx did 15 years ago #what a silly guy B*)

[buggiebite]

Long Day at School

Daddy! Peeta makes my heart melt. Figured everyone needed some of him to withstand the winter.

#dad bod! Peeta does things to me that I can’t explain on tumblr sorry #bc you can’t tell me after 20 years he doesn’t look like a dad #he’s in his 40s let him eat cheese buns and complain about his back hurting #and I just know the toast babies would hang on him and want to be held constantly #he’d want to hold them constantly #que walking into the bakery and he’s got both kids on his hips and he asks how he can help you #but my personal little heacannon for this pic #the school and bakery aren’t too far apart so he picks up the kids if Katniss can’t (she’s hunting #and he picks them up after letting them play with their friends for a few minutes #in this pic toastbaby girl is probably 5ish and toastbaby boy is a baby so he wouldn’t be in school yet #I headcannon the siblings are 3ish years apart #but Peeta picks up his little girl from school and she’s not chattering about her day like usual #she falls asleep on his shoulder before they even leave town #her name is Willow #but he calls her so many endearing names #buggiebite #the hunger games #katniss everdeen #everlark #fanart #peeta mellark #thg #katniss everdeen fanart #district 12 #katniss mellark #katniss and peeta #toastbaby girl #toastbaby

[youremyonlyhope]

I love when I see posts like "Share how many crochet WIPs you currently have! I have 5, it's so many!"

Like, girl, I have unfinished projects from over a decade ago that I refuse to frog on the off chance I decide to finish them. I've found years-old projects I forgot I even started and will impulsively just finish it on the spot. I've started three different projects in the last 2 months, including one I started yesterday, that I already know I may or may not finish within the year depending on motivation.

The number of WIPs I have is infinite.

#crochet #knitting #needlepoint #sewing #embroidery #shoutout to the time it took me 4 years to make my dad a hat. and like 6 years to make a turtle for a teacher. #i picked up yarn spinning for ONE day in like 2017. i have not done it since. #there's a half finished elephant amigurumi sitting in a basket and i started that guy in like 2011 #i have two maybe three shawls i know of that are sitting unfinished in a storage bag #plenty of swatches of things that i start and lose interest in #currently i have a cardigan i wanted to make and started it and then got bored so i stopped #there's a hat i was knitting for my nanna that i started maybe 2 days before she passed #and that's sat unfinished i can't even look at it. i have no clue if i'll ever actually finish it. #there's at least one skirt i never finished sewing. and two skirts i have all the materials for but haven't started. #i know i have one beach cover up dress and one cover up skirt that i started in 2017 and didn't finish. #i think my oldest work in progress though dates back to when i was 9 or 10. i made a slipper. never finished the other foot. #that was in 2005 or 06. so literally i might have WIPs older than someone who is reading this. #and those are the just some of the ones i REMEMBER. buried in my yarn stash are probably others i've just forgotten.

[words-writ-in-starlight]

You could say that I have strong feelings about this ongoing debate

#critical role #we can all have coffee on Ludinus' grave and debate the nature of morality until we're blue in the face. but priorities. #cr spoilers #bell's hells #HHHHHHH false dichotomies are not a friend #the choice is not a binary Gods Or Predathos #and you should not pick Predathos just because you don't like the other option!!!!! #anyway i have uhhhh 15 memes that i made tonight because that is who i am as a person #also. also. hey. guys. everybody. #if your philosophical debate is leading you to go 'idk maybe the murderers are onto something' #boy HOWDY you better have the information to back that up! #the thing is I'm not mad this devate is happening i think it's very realistic that people would get caught up in this debate given the given #i have just painstakingly cultivated the ability to have an argument and i have strong feelings about rhetoric #[bangs on a pot lid with a spoon] CONSIDER ALL ANGLES BEFORE YOU DOUBLE DOWN ON A POSITION #if you're curious #yes i am EXACTLY like this in a real life argument i have been told i am infuriating to argue with #both because of my love of Sources and because of my need to be absolutely dead sure of something before i get in a fight about it #which have the annoying tendency to make me like. not lose a lot of fights.

[nick-cassidy]

laurens vanthoor podium slip + kévin estre laughing at him

#laurens vanthoor #kévin estre #wec #nothing brings me joy like kév throwing his head back to laugh before going to pick laurens back up

[tmnt-sharednightmaresau]

Hey Leon! You know who could help you out? Baron Draxum. I bet you could convince him to keep this a secret.

Leon: Though he probably has something to do with this

.

Beginning || Previous || Next

#I’m so sorry for being gone for so long #I got about halfway through asks before life isekaid me me to hell #finals week is right around the corner so I’ve been busier than ever #so sorry again #but I’ll pick the asks right back up #shared nightmares tmnt #tmnt #tmnt shared nightmares #tmnt!sn #sn!answers #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt #tmnt crossover #tmnt 2012 #2012 tmnt

[alsojnpie]

dishes are forever

#I MISSED HAVING A TABLET!!!! #ht papyrus #a gentle touch when you're sad #a menacing touch when it would be funny #he can do it all #LITTLE PRO TIP LIFE HACK THOUGH: IF WASHING DISHES MAKES YOU WANT TO LIVE ON A DIFFERENT PLANET #MAYBE YOU HAVE TOO MANY DANG DISHES #BEING IN A SITUATION WHERE I HAVE 80% FEWER DISHES THAN BEFORE MEANS I DO DISHES MORE OFTEN BUT IT'S SO EASY #AND NOT SOUL SUCKING AT ALL #JUST MY EXPERIENCE!!!!!! THAT'S ALL #I'm sure when i am reunited with my other dishes i will languish in bed staring at this psyching myself up to the task #but i like keeping random jars from food i bought and dishes that i picked up in different places. #they physically remind me of everywhere I've been and sometimes i just look at them and remember where I've been #my favorite is the old ratatouille jar i bought at carrefour in Chengdu #that jarred ratatouille was the nastiest food to grace this earth #i bought it in case it would make a quick easy meal (you don't really find those at the grocery store in China at least not back then) #but even my cheap lazy self couldn't eat it #so no one ever consumed that ratatouille but the jar was pretty big so i put other stuff in it and now it's my dish #and somehow the label is glued on PERMANENTLY it has never washed off after all these years #actually idk maybe it eventually did it isn't here for me to look at but it lasted a long time i know that

[florbelles]

HEARTBREAKING—sicko mad with power leads companions with tyranny

#another day another high effort shitpost <3 #gale's look back. yeah me too #oc: sile cosantoir #bg3 #*bg3edit #*sile #*ocedit #v: la tour abolie #gale dekarios for filtering #shadowheart for filtering #minthara baenre for filtering #astarion for filtering #yes i'm exploiting the no party limit before picking up nessa. i couldn't deny minthy the chance to sort of kill a clown.

[qtubbo]

Ive actually been trying so hard at trying to figure out why people think qphil doesn’t care about qtubbo, and I mean specifically care nothing else. Cause you can argue tubbo’s not one of his most important people that’s fair, but also you don’t have to be at the top of a list for them to care. It’d also be really hard to argue that he doesn’t trust tubbo, and in that same vein not respect him at all. Their relationship is very complicated, and it is true that it’s way more onesided than people like to admit, but it’s not like Phil has just shown Tubbo zero attention or love. My best guess so far from all I’ve seen it’s because Phil fundamentally doesn’t understand who Tubbo is as a person, and has this very shallow view of him. So people have taken Phil’s mischaracterization of Tubbo as a sign that he doesn’t actually care for the real Tubbo? Idk I like to figure out how fandoms think… (oh also if you have your own ideas why just like tell me I’d love to know)

#I need a deeper reason then they just think Phil doesn’t trust tubbo its something internal #Because care doesn’t equal trust so even if it was that people wouldn’t go straight for that conclusion #Btw to me Phil does care for Tubbo he just doesn’t get Tubbo so he thinks Tubbo already understands that #For example him thinking tubbo has an ego when tubbo has very clear self esteem issues #Which is something most incudling his not very close friends have picked up on #He ignores the obvious about tubbo that break his idea of him #because to him he already knows tubbo so theres no need to seek out a greater understanding #Which is something I think is starting to break more recently if youll allow me to rant #Qsmp #In purgatory Tubbo did not change in any serious moral way and it was unlikely he would even looking at it before hand but phil was so sure #He did from the get go. The idea that tubbo could change so drastically is a heavy misunderstanding of who tubbo is ecause of that I think #Phils starting to realize his idea of Tubbo is off it’s not alligned to the actual person #Qsmp phil #Qsmp tubbo #But phil has bigger things to worry about right now so thats taking the back burner he can worry about the purple stuff only he can see

[s0fter-sin]

thinking about the way ghost doesn't hesitate to start killing shadows when graves betrays them but soap only takes one hostage

you can almost hear the voice in his head telling him it doesn't have to be this way; they can still talk it out

"i'm calling shepherd"

his first instinct when confronted with betrayal is to play it by the books; to go up the chain and sort it out democratically. that goes against everything we've seen him do; he’s quick to drop his enemies and bucks authority at every chance except for the one time he's confronted with the barrels of his allies' guns

he wants a peaceful resolution; for the first time we've ever seen, he doesn't want violence to be the answer

there has to be another fix, a solution that doesn't end with him killing the same men he's been working with; his friends

nothing's happened yet

it doesn't have to go this way

but ghost has been betrayed before. he knows the way this ends; either with him six feet under or his enemy

he doesn't hesitate

it's only when they knock alejandro out that soap shoots; when they spill the first blood and cross a line they can never come back from

only when ghost orders him to run and he has to cover his retreat

and somewhere along the line, between civilians’ screams and taunting voices, between his shaking breath and ghost steady in his ear, that naivety is stripped away; his trust turned to teeth that he uses to sink into throats of men he'd have given his life for

"be careful who you trust, sergeant; people you know can hurt you the most"

he's learned the price of trust

just like ghost did

but unlike ghost, he has someone to guide him through the aftermath

"good advice, It"

#i might crown myself the ceo of soap meta at this point i love digging into this boy #but it seriously fucks me up how much he tries to de escalate the situation #invoking shepherd like hes trying to remind graves of who funds him and the power he holds #the consequences he’ll face if he goes through with this. just stop and think it through first #only to be stricken silent when graves drops ‘general shepherd sends his regards’ #he doesnt say a single word after that #ghosts the one who picks up the lead for him ‘he knows about this?’ #he can still function through his shock and the gut wrenching betrayal bc he’s been through this before #and he knows freezing will get him killed #but soap doesnt #he freezes #getting shot is something he wouldve been through before but being shot by an ally? #at that moment he isnt sergeant mactavish #hes johnny and hes in shock #and thats why ghost yelling for johnny doesnt reach him #he only breaks through when he calls him soap. when hes forced back into a soldiers mindset #thats all thats keeping him going. he isnt johnny a man whos been betrayed by a friend #hes a soldier following direct orders to keep himself alive #i can only imagine the after #when he lets his rage run out and is faced with the vulnerable and painful betrayal #but ghosts there to help him through that too. there for johnny the way he wished someone had been there for him #coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt #cod mw2 #john soap mactavish #soap cod #simon ghost riley #ghost cod #soapghost

[puppyeared]

if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified

#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing #i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though #at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself #as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed #escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date #although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL #ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting #workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety #i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back #AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO #im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts #i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem #in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material #and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school #maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess #only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard #hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms #i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work #not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall #anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh #yapping

[youraveragecatastrophe]

[ID : four pencil sketches, digitally colored, of characters from the 2019 show Carmen Sandiego.

Carmen as seen by Zack and Ivy during their first meeting in the donut shop, but she looks closer to her young appearance in VILE island : her hair goes to her shoulders, her face is rounder and she wears the coat and hat she stole from Cookie Booker. She is frowning and balling her fists as if trying to appear intimidating.

Carmen on the runway in Milan. Her hair, in a ponytail, is fluffy like her regular hair. She looks to the viewer with a cocky smile as she strikes a pose.

Julia in Rio, wearing the ACME suit with the pants instead of the skirt. She is leaning against the table where Carmen and Shadowsan were drinking coffee, looking intently at a cup.

Zack at the party in Dubai, wearing a black jacket with a complex multicolored pattern. He looks to the side with a smile. /End ID]

Some things I wish we'd seen in season 2 of Carmen Sandiego! In no particular order, a visibly younger and scruffy Carmen during her first meeting with Ivy and Zack, Carmen's Milan runway look having her fluffy hair instead of it being straightened, Julia in an ACME pantsuit instead of the skirt, and Zack wearing a more original jacket than the black one he wore in the Emirates.

(Zack's suit is from here, because I could not design something this complicated)

#carmen sandiego 2019 #carmen sandiego #julia argent #zack cs #my art #technically these were ready a month ago. then i lacked time for the finishing touches. THEN i decided wait actually i want basic bgs #ft the fastest backgrounds i've ever drawn. and let me tell you they were a blast to draw! #obv very much the bg from the corresponding episodes #this isn't the jacket i would've designed for zack if it had actually been for the show (that would've been a bitch to animate i bet) #but i figured i could have fun with it! #and then i drew every part of the pattern by hand instead of using the special tools in photoshop. whyyyy #also i forgot zack had his hair combed back during the party... that's what happens when you don't rewatch the episode before drawing #let's say that's after he got to loosen up bc the mission went without a hitch :) #once again let me reiterate: i hate julia's acme suit with a burning passion. WHAT ARE THOSE SKIRTS. HIDEOUS. #let her wear pants dammit #anyway i missed coloring SO. MUCH. i want to pick up my tablet again and draw let me draw let me colorrrr

[samarecharm]

geniunely not trying to put words in ur mouth im geniunely asking: what do you actually like about persona 5? from all ur rants im just wondering why you didnt drop the game bc it seems (again, im not trying to put words in ur mouth) that it simply not for you? i geniunely have not felt any of the issues you bring up outside of the writing ones and i cannot tell if i'm just easily pleased and not good at discerning what a good game is or we simply have dif things we enjoy in a video game. i hate getting tone across text but im asking out of geniune curiosity im not trying to attack your opinion (;-;)

Nah, i dont feel like ur attacking me, and I hope u dont feel the same when u see my complaints! Lmao. In my defense, I am replaying the game for the first time after completing my first file back in 2020, so alot of the faults i kinda shrugged off in my first playthrough are now glaringly in my face now that I no longer have the confusion and interest in learning the main story to keep me occupied. The game is clunky all the way through, and at some times, even frustratingly so.

But despite that, i do like this game. Alot! Its probably one of my top games ever if im being honest!

This ended up way longer than I intended, so im putting it under a readmore to keep the post short on dashboards

If i had to describe what I liked about the game in the simplest way imaginable…I think I would say, I like how the game makes me feel :) I like the music. I like the vibe. I like the immersion from city to city, and I like the premise! I like the characters and I like the connections you make with these characters! As im replaying this game, i am most excited to see Akira and his comments about the world :) i like hearing everyones voices, I like their little interactions in Mementos, and I like seeing them fight!

P5 is the first game I played in the series; its the game that introduced me to SMT in the first place! And it (smt) is a series that my longtime best friend LOVES and never thought hed be able to share with me! It is a game i keep very near to my heart; it has influenced me in ways i did not think would happen in the short couple of years since i first finished it. It genuinely keeps me awake some nights thinking about the world this game has created, and I think that is a testament to the impact its had, be it good or bad.

The joke about wishing theyd make a persona game that was Good is that despite all of its numerous flaws, the games manage to snatch your attention and pull you in anyway. Imagine if they made a game that had all of those things that i mentioned I loved, but done Right and executed Properly?? Where I got to have a story that made sense and didnt need to be spoonfed to me (in like an HOUR of dialogue and scenes; an HOUR!), and characters that talked and bonded beyond the tiny snippets of interaction theyre allowed to have in mementos? Combat that let me use PERSONAS i liked instead of BUILDS that stop me from getting instakilled throughout the entirety of the endgame, and a Persona building mechanic that didnt feel like I was shooting in the dark looking for possible fusions that end up not even being useful in the endgame.

Ive mentioned it before, but I complain so much bc I have seen what a good p5 game looks like, and its Strikers almost to a T. Combat is still your typical warriors-esque style combat, but it is at least different from the turn based strategy of the main game. Characters talk to each other freely, they hang out and comfort each other in a way that feels more connected that the base game. Strikers implements the ability to see ALL possible fusions with ALL registered personas, not just the ones in your Stock, so you can fuse easily without having yo consult a guide. The story feels like it makes SENSE with antagonists that feel morally grey and sympathetic. Genuinely, alot of the complaints for p5 I had were almost immediately rectified in this game.

But please also know that the praises I sing for this game is only bc of the groundwork laid by p5 and the world it created. Thats what I like about this game, that it had such a captivating premise and cast of characters, that a DIFFERENT company was able to hit the ground running with them. P5 had alot happening in that game, but i think what it had most was potential. The effort put into this game is astronomical, and the possible connections you can outright MISS if u arent paying attention was worth the money and time to implement; even if it meant that it could be considered a waste of resources to higher ups.

Books and games and part time jobs???!! Silly little cutscenes that add nothing to the game PLOTwise, but define and flesh out the personality of your protagonist. There was alot of love put into this game, and its evident by the fact that we have NOT seen a new persona game released; they bank on existing titles bc they are unwilling to make a game like this from scratch again. They dont want to ‘waste’ resources on good voice acting and a complex, overarching story; they dont want to waste money on scenes a player may never see, on routes a player may never get to experience. Making a game that gives u even the slightest bit of freedom means more money in programming and detailing that freedom. This has been an issue for a WHILE, and its a miracle that the gaming landscape had space for a colossal title like p5!

I complain bc I want better, and I do not think that is inherently at odds with my love of this game. In b4 im told to get good; ive played on hard and tested out merciless (its NOT fun, im making godbuilds again and its boring 😞). Its not the most accessible turnbased rpg; theres no colorblind modes, and the affinity system is convoluted and overwhelming. Combo moves are hard to keep track of and it can be incredibly frustrating to see your turns being skipped or seeing characters take extreme technical damage without understanding WHY it happened. The fact that they KNEW the game was desperate for qol improvements by the time royal came out, and instead of updating the base game to have those improvements too, they just pushed the royal edition out for people to play instead. It sucks! Customers and fans deserve better than being forced to shell out money for a game they already played !

As the gaming climate gets more and more hostile and unbearable, I think it is good to look at your games critically, and understand why products come out subpar. Persona 5 is a fun game that has a nice cast and an interesting premise, but it is ultimately tied down by its refusal to build on existing building blocks regarding its combat, and it insists on having insulting and downright out of character dialogue and scenes to appease the audience its designed to be targeted to. It is easy to forget sometimes that queer ppl are infact NOT the prime target of these games, its cishet gamer bros from aged 16 to 40 who will laugh at homophobic comments, who drool over a 16 yr old girl with a 16 yr old mindset and a grown womans body, who need to be placated with constant sexual comments to deal with a convoluted story that will inevitably make zero sense until its laid out for you before the literal end of the game.

Its bad. Its good. Its so shallow and its unbelievable that they thought having the plot twist make ZERO sense until they showed CUTSCENES of YOUR character discussing Goro and his connections to the metaverse for endgame SHOCK VALUE was more important than just having your team be smart and piece it together over time. Its shit. Its literally amazing. It let you FUCK your teacher ??????????????what the FUCK. They also let me shoot a god in the face w the best looking ult persona in the world so i can ignore that shit. And ultimately that is how i got through the game. Lol.

#chattin #answered #i have mentioned it before but i did NOT romance anyone #u know why? bc i literally didnt know it existed #i maxed out ann and the game was like ‘hey. this next decision is important’ #and i was like. huh. u know what. i have not looked up a guide until now. thats scary. i dont want to lose a confidant… #and learned that. #so uh. i really DID go through the game bot realizing i could date anyone. even the adults. #anyway. this was alot. and i tried to keep out alot of my other complaints #bc i have so many. but they are like. either nitpicky things or things that are issues in lots of games too #like the models suck in this game but i can look past that. graphics are always bottom on the list of complaints #and i do like the little animations!! i like akiras little tics #and i like seeing personas do their casting animations; shiki ouji and nekomata are my faves #i distinctly remember that being a thing i wished to see more of. #bc i liked thinking of what joker would look like fighting for Real #and then i remembered him being in smash so i was like COOL. ill look at those #and then i got STRIKERS and it was exactly what I wanted #i think #the game is like. #its bad. but in ways that i wouldnt call another game bad #like back 4 blood is BAD bad. its awful. the gameplay is bad. the story was shit. and the servers shut down within a year or two of launch #risk of rain 2 is bad in the way that it continuously obscures and withholds information to the player. its tedious and frustrating #but unlike b4b i LIKE ror2 and will continue to enjoy it. #bc the gameplay loop FEELS satisfying #and ultimately thats how i feel about p5 #for all of its faults; its fun. it has a gameplay loop that is consistent and fun when u get the hang of it #im playing on hard again since merciless is just me making the right instakill builds while i pick up my team over and over again #and theres still a challenge in having the endgame weapons and armor #its satisfying! and i think its satisfying bc I was given the luck of having this be my introduction into the series #maybe i would have a better opinion on the game if i came from p4. or maybe not! who knows !

[brainrotdotorg]

My grandmother had a stroke . Shes lucid and out of surgery right now so i am thankful for that. Going to be staying at my grandparents place tonight. Drove a super long way to come back and im so so so tired and i have a cold n cant stop coughing and i miss my boyfriend and i dont want to drive ever again

#not doing well. my head hurts. im just exhausted and trying to sleep #but my nose is stuffed #im just glad my grandmother is doing better than the doctors expectee #i was so scared i was crying like half the drive back home #awful car crash on the high way thd blocked the roads for two hours. two cars completely totaled. #scared the shit out of me. #started raining like ive never seen before when i was on the road too. could barely see ten feet ahead of me #ive just been so on guard all day long and nos im laying in bed trying to decompress #before i pick my mom up from the airport #idk man.

[skunkes]

Hope you giggle and smile big today

i hope so toooo t_t thank u

#im having a very small one day outing with my best friend in her city on saturday #so today i have to finish comms and get everything sorted and sift thru march's comms and get those sorted #bc she'll be picking me up friday night #ill get 2 nights of a break before diving back in....bt im already running on empty its been so hard to sit and focus on art #also cookie is having issues :[ + ive been on Low Sleep for the past [forever] im just really Frayed right now #dungeon meshi thursday...save me....i want to giggle and smile big.... #anonymous #skunk mail

[abtheb]

April 28, 2023

Despite everything, it's still you.

#me #ive cut back on lifting a lot due to injuries and struggles with my joints and instead picked up lane swimming in march #i had never used a public pool in my life and never swam with intent before #it was new and kind of terrifying but i needed to move my body again in a way that didnt cause pain #the first few times were pretty rough- i couldnt swim well or hold my breath and struggled with the repetitive motion and breathing #one day beams of sunlight shone through the airy space and large windows and cast shining watery reflections on the pool's bottom #i had been learning water caustics for 3d art and i loved to watch them #its gotten a lot easier now and i can let my mind wander and enjoy the sensations instead of worrying about drowning #the cool water on my skin #the muffled amniotic sounds of bubbling fluids #the mosaic tiles and patterns #the sunlight and caustics #every time i go its a social stress test- but I've gotten better at handling it and it helps me connect with other people in a tiny way #i dont know what the future of my body's training will look like as i plow into middle age #but im proud of myself for doing something totally new and finding joy in it