#but it is the best I could do this week

[sonseulsoleil]

you deserve joy -- Alice Oseman, loveless

for @heartstoppercentral's pride event! day 6, free choice!

#Heartstopper #Heartstopper tv #heartstoppercentral #hcpride22 #heartstopperedit #my edits #Charlie Spring #Nick Nelson #Elle Argent #Tara Jones #Darcy Olsson #Isaac Henderson #this is not my best work #but it is the best I could do this week #with my spotty internet and long work hours #it would be better if I could make gifs but alas I do not posses that skill #anyways this pride event has been really lovely and I wish I could have participated more fully #but I am glad I could at least make something

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

#dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims #senshi #laios touden #marcille donato #izutsumi #oyasumi punpun #<- In case you are wondering what the source for the little bird guy is. #Yeah that's right. I'm back to my extremely obscure crossover BS. #Punpun is one of those series that falls under the category of 'Good! but I cannot responsibly recommend this to anyone." #If Dungeon Meshi is like a friend asking you to go on a quick errand and you accidently go on a life changing roadtrip - #Punpun is your friend asking to go on a quick errand and they pull up to the vet and tell you your dog is being put down. #Then they explode into sludge. Melting your car. You hitchhike back but the person who picked you up is an axe murderer. #I could not finish it. My friends who did say it was good. But agree it was for the best I did not finish it. #Hey speaking of tone twists...We are one episode away from one of my favourite chapters being animated! #WHO'S READY FOR THE SENSHI BACKSTORY! WHO IS READY TO CRY! #ME! I AM! I spooked my flatmate with how energetic I was this morning. I'm vibrating with energy I was not designed to contain. #I should talk about today's episode here: It was very good. I love how they animated the familiars. #And!!! Anime only people now are in the loop on the Chilchuck lore. Part 1 of many. He still contains multitudes. #They all do to be honest! If this episode told us anything it was that we still don't know these characters as well as we think! #See you guys next week. I'll be inconsolable.

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Qatar Grand Prix - Sprint - Oscar Piastri

#not my best ever gifs i dont think BUT IM SOOOOO HAPPPYYYYYYYY!!!!!! #OSCAR P1!!!!!! OSCAR WIN!!!!!! OSCAR ROOKIE WIN LETS GOOOOO #i still cant believe it this is absolutely insane #i feel like i find myself saying this every week about oscar but wow #back in bahrain i could never have imagined him winning a race this year!! IN HIS ROOKIE SEASON!!!! #I was shocked when i woke up to see him have gotten pole in the shootout #AND THEN TO WATCH HIM WIN!!!! SOOOOOOO GOOD #Im so proud of him sob sob sob #again: throwbacl to me and dru talking abt the possibility of him podiuming or even winning #and i was like no way i doubt it with this car. nevermind :) ive never been so happy to be incorrect #WHERE IS MARK!??!!?!??!!? WHERE ARE YOU???? YOUR BOY JUST FUCKING WON!!!! WHERE IS THE HUG???? WHERE IS THE CONGRATS??? #i swear to god if i check his insta and theres yet another animal vid on his story im going to kill the old man #HE WAS WANDERING AROUND THE GARAGE YESTERDAY FOR QUALI!! WHERE WAS HE TODAY AAAGHHHHHH #oscar piastri #f1 #formula 1 #formula one #2023 qatar grand prix #2023 qatar gp #we do a little bit of f1

[sluckythewizard]

YOU JUST HƎARD IT FROM [HIS MOUTH] FOR SURƎ!!!

#cw gore #cw blood #jrwi fanart #jrwi suckening spoilers #jrwi suckening #BEEN VEHEMENTLY SCRIBBLING THIS THING ALL DAY #IM SO FUCKING IN LVOE W THE NEW EPISODE #VIV N VEX ARE LITERALLY EVERYTHING I COULDVE EVER WANTED. I LOVE BLOOD AND MEAT AND BLOOD AND MEAT #THE SCRIBBLE IS KINDA ROUGH SO DONT LOOK AT IT TOO HARD BUT EHEHEHEEEE THE FACE THAT I CREATED UNNERVES ME #AND IM VERY HAPPY ABOUT THAT. I LOVE CREATING SOMETHING AND HAVING IT EVEN SLIGHTLY PHASE ME #I LOVED ALL THE TOOTH RIPPING NOISES IN THIS EPISODE. AHVE U EVER HAD A TOOTH REMOVED? #SHE USED A BLUNT METAL TOOL TO PUNCH IT OUT. IT REMINDED ME OF THE SPLINTERING OF A TREE. THE WAY IT TORE. #SUCH A SPECIFIC SORT OF CRUNCHING AND SPLINTERING AS A MOLAR WAS RRRRIPPPEEDD FROM THE SOCKET. OHH I LOVE IT. #GOING IN FOR A ROOT CANAL NEXT WEEK AND IM VERY EXCITED. ALL THE DENTISTS LOVE ME N ARE SO NICE TO ME #WHAT A GREAT EPISODE. I HOPE THE URGE TO DRAW MORE STRIKES ME LIKE THIS AGAIN. WEEEE!! #I WANNA ANIMATE EMIZEL GETTIN HIS EYE RRIPPED OUT. BUT. IM ALREADY COOKING 3 OTHER VIV N VEX ANIMATIONS #THERES NO WAY THEY WILL ALL BE FINISHED HELP!! HELP MEE!!!! I HAVE TO MANY IDEAS AND NOT ENOUGH HANDS. DO U GUYS REMEMBER HTF? #OR HAPPY TREE FRIENDS. THE CUTE ANIMAL SHOW W ALL THE BLOOD AND GORE AND TERRIBLE TERRIBLE THINGS HAPPENING TO THE CUTE ANIMALS #in elementary school i would show the 'eyes cold lemonade' to other kids and tell em thats how they make pink lemonade. #hope that helps you undertsand. i wish i could make a lil cartoon w just viv n vex doing what they do best #LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT. IM GOING BACK TO MY LAB. DONT EXPECT TO HEAR FROM ME IN A MILLION YEARS

[horse-head-farms]

day 2: Royalty/Knight @mcyt-yuri-week

False, a knight famous for her ability to slay magical beings, was sent by her king to defeat the greatest threat of all - the fae. Here, she enters the faerie realm and is greeted by none other than the queen herself, waiting upon her forest throne.

Having grown up on tales of the fae and their evil trickery, False is surprised by how beautiful and kind the queen is, but isn’t going to let down her guard yet.

Queen Stress is rather impressed by this mortal who not only managed to find her way into the faerie realm, but is also brave (and foolish) enough to try and fight her! She has no intention of hurting False, and instead wants to teach her the mischievous ways of the fairies, get her to lighten up a bit and all that. And, well, if she tries to court the handsome knight along the way, who can blame her?

#im not sapphic (bi guy) but the world could always do with more gay women so i was like. might be fun to do yuri week! #i know for royalty/knight its usually a monarch and their protector and that is fun but i wanted to subvert that a bit #and have a knight who is actually sent to defeat that monarch. and also faerie queen stress is just perfect have you seen her hcvh outfit? #most of my art on here is quick doodles to get my ideas down but for this one i really wanted to go all out and create something nice #mcytyuriweekvalentines #mcyt #also this is days late oops but it still counts #fress #falsestress #i am not tagging a certain someone who is a tumblr user #stressmonster101 #hermitcraft #hermitshipping #hermitshipblr #my art #not in this but i imagine iskall is also here as a fairy. he’s stress’ advisor / best friend / guy who does her dirty work on earth

[hyakunana]

Happy Birthday, Rasputin!!

#destiny #destiny 2 #destiny the game #bungie #destiny art #season of the seraph #ana bray #anastasia bray #elsie bray #elisabeth bray #exo stranger #warmind rasputin #I STILL HAVE TWO PAGES LEFT TO DO FOR THIS WEEK RELATED TO THESE ONES BUT I'LL LEAVE FOR LATER #BC I AM TIRED AND I BARELY HAVE ARMS LEFT JKXCHXZCOZXCBINIOX #'clovis bray has deceived you' me: WOW HOLYSH WHO COULD EVER--' #'i was built to take the traveler's place' me: //disk scratch// wAIT HOL D ON WH A T #rasputin cursing clovis... definitely a bray child #ana doing her best to teach culture for rasputin and then comes his aunt to teach him the right words #fun fact the rhulk emote was a last second idea dfghjk i wanted the young wolf to step in dramatically #but then i blinked and 'wow looks like the rhulk kick... what if i--' sdfghjk it doesnt make sense but maybe thats the point #good things of being a middle child-- i know exactly how elder siblings brag on younger ones and how younger ones are 'ok alright stop' #HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE HOPE YOU ALL ALSO HAVE LIKED MY DAWNING COMIC! #BC I DID THESE TWO POSTS IN A SPAM OF A WEEK OR TWO idk how to count anymore xcjhxjbiucz

[inkskinned]

i hate how commodity and capitalism has ruined so much storytelling . i hate how sequels and prequels and whatever else all ring like merch sales; i hate that i as an author have to include any social media following i have as a marketable trait; i hate that everything feels like a xerox of a copy of a dream of a memory.

i hate that my nostalgia has been turned into profit. i hate that companies fear consumer backlash so no real commentary may be made; i hate that companies care more about quantity over quality. i hate that so many artists and creators are being overworked to the point of complete collapse rather than being allowed to tell the story their way. i hate that every point of representation has to be fought for. i hate it i want us all to go back to living in a cave .

when you sit with friends over a bonfire and the night is getting long and people start telling this slow, almost hypnotic story - in this quiet voice, like they don't expect you to listen while they say the most fucked up shit you've ever heard - that is storytelling. who cares if the punchline is car hand hook door. storytelling has always been about community, about us all sitting in the dark, choosing to fill the silence while the last embers are dying. we forgot that storytelling is spellwork. hallucinating together, our breaths held, waiting for the ending we already knew was coming.

#this is specifically due to my rage and undying hatred of megacorporation #disney. #and specifically bc i think there COULD have been a really good series of new #dinosaur island t rex movies #if they had just fucking gone the distance #stopped with the fucking bad CGI #and made the whole thing about late-stage capitalism #do you wanna know what would ACTUALLY sell and work on the big screen more than a trex screaming in front of a volcano #(u absolute jerkweeds)? #so they've rebuilt the island and the park. but the narrative is 100% #that nobody wants to fucking work there and it feels AT BEST cult-like and insular. nobody is paid well for this #at EVERY possible place they are cutting corners. the dinosaurs might have higher walls #but the handlers are paid 5.34 an hour due to island laws. the corporation has RFID tags in their costumes which they are forced to wear #the employees are not allowed to drink water in 120 degree heat bc it would be upsetting to guests #u know real things i experienced working for disney #(but it was 8.90) #anyway it turns out the park CEO knew the risks and just didnt care bc bottom line BAYBEE. #it would be so much more sobering and fucking GOOD if it was like. scientists being like ''i am an environmental scientist'' #''after the epa was slashed this is literally the only job i could find. i literally HAD to take it or i couldn't feed my family.'' #''i hate what i do. i am disgusted by it. i literally CANNOT STOP because the company also charges us 400 dollars a week to live here'' #the dinosaurs escape EARLY in my movie. like minute 45. and then... 1 week later #the park reopens. #half the staff are missing. they're just fucking gone. it doesn't matter tho the company tells everyone to work 2x as hard #that those people weren't loyal enough or they are tragic heroes bc they died doing what they love #and the movie isn't like ''wow dinosaurs scary!!!'' it's... #that in a global fucking pandemic disney kept sacrificing employees. #but it'll be disguised bc the pandemic will be dinosaurs. #this my beloved is what we call an ALLEGORY but unfortunately certain companies have never heard of them #allegories require critical thinking and that doesn't test well with audiences

[kissdeficiency]

for stolitz week! here’s day 2 (hurt/comfort) ✨:

#helluva boss #helluva fanart #helluva stolas #stolas #helluva blitzo #blitzo #stolitz #my art #i’m busy with college work so i can’t do the rest of the week (also hence why i didn’t do day 1) :(( #i’m a pretty slow artist so this was the best i could do in short notice #hope you still enjoyed it anyways!! <3 #drawing angst for the two is so much fun :DD #IGNORE ANY MISTAKES I WAS RUSHING BSJS

[aroaceleovaldez]

the “canon” fatal flaw that bugs me the most is that Nico’s is allegedly supposed to be “holding grudges” but LITERALLY EVERYTHING HE DOES SAYS OTHERWISE

the only instances we get of Nico even remotely doing anything with a “grudge” is him spontaneously, randomly, on rare occasion referencing being grumpy at something - THAT HE IS ENTIRELY VALID TO BE UPSET AT - and then does nothing with that. other than maybe continue to be vaguely grumpy about it and then drop it. In fact, Nico is consistently EXTREMELY forgiving to people despite him having perfectly valid reasons to not forgive them. Percy literally choked Nico and ditched him in the Underworld and Nico STILL brought Percy to the River Styx and faced off against Hades to bring THREE gods and an army of the undead to Percy’s aid, despite Hades actively suggesting alternatives to Nico and encouraging Nico to not do that.

Nico’s fatal flaw is so clearly either that he does not let go of things (not the same as holding grudges) OR that he’s far too willing to put others before himself, often directly putting himself at risk instead. He’s too self-sacrificial. He was explicitly willing to trade HIMSELF for Bianca and extremely resistant to letting go of her. He put himself on the line facing against Hades to help Percy MULTIPLE TIMES. He risked getting in trouble with the Underworld to bring back Hazel. He WILLING WENT INTO TARTARUS to try to close the Doors of Death himself. He offered to shadow-travel the Athena Parthenos for Reyna despite knowing it would most likely kill him. Etc. etc. The closest Nico has ever gotten to “holding a grudge” was being mad at Leo for faking his own death, and even then he was only Mildly Annoyed and got over it pretty quickly after Leo returned.

Nico “holding grudges” is a load of bull. Percy’s loyalty? Annabeth’s hubris? Absolutely true. Percy’s loyalty to Annabeth and Annabeth’s hubris are what got them pulled into Tartarus (also, interestingly - Percy’s hubris in TLO and Annabeth’s loyalty taking a knife for him is what nearly got them killed then). Nico, though? Nico’s willingness to put himself on the line for the sake of others is what nearly got him killed in BoTL and TLO and HoO and brought him to Tartarus multiple times, now! “Holding grudges,” yeah, right.

#pjo #nico di angelo #percy jackson #riordanverse #I AM FOREVER MAD ABOUT THIS #nico is OCCASIONALLY GRUMPY AT BEST #he holds grudges like a fucking strainer holds water #he has SO MANY OPPORTUNITIES TO BE MAD AT PERCY ABOUT SO MANY THINGS THAT ARE ENTIRELY VALID #and instead he EXPLICITLY goes ''why am i physically incapable of being mad at Percy?'' #''guess ill just try to convince myself he's annoying or something and hope it goes away'' #Nico is the embodiment of the ''You have befriended Nico! Nico would now DIE FOR YOU'' #he does it for Percy. he does it for Hazel. he does it for Reyna. THE LIST GOES ON #if someone tolerates his presence they could tell him to go swan dive into Tartarus and he'd do it #anyways tune in next week or something for me to make a shitpost animatic that directly contradicts this char analysis

[todayisafridaynight]

#rgg #ryu ga gotoku #yakuza series #ryu ga gotoku 7 #yakuza like a dragon #yakuza 7 #jo sawashiro #snap sketches #//loudest shrugging of my life// LOL #ive been watching too many mvs ive decided.... i know all i could think of while drawin was atashi LOL #atashi isnt a sawashiro song in the slightest is the funniest part. the song's just been in my head fr weeks.. #ok well piss im p sure. i have no time left to draw now 🥴 #gon be busy this week so lettttsssss do our best besties YAR

[orykorioart]

TAZ Sapphic Week Day 5: Haunted

Couldn’t finish what I originally scheduled for day 5 (so itll have to be pushed back), but I still wanted to have something. So let’s have a quick experimental Lureen (if that is the ship name?) angst! Because that little scene in the GN really got me 😔✌️.

#i suppose this could also be interpreted as Lupcretia #Bc the ghostly figure is intentionally vague and distorted. So it’s up to your interpretation! #This... feels too angsty for Sapphic week. I’m sorry yall. Next days will be very cute dont worry #but then again the bingo does include Betrayal and Haunted. which are ripe for angst #taz sapphic week #taz #the adventure zone #tazb #taz balance #lucretia #maureen miller #anw. I had fun doing this. now back into my internship report woo (crying) #hopefully i will have time before i go to sleep to finish more for day 6 & 7 #also I hope the ID is okay - I’m not sure how I would best describe whatever this is #is Impressionistic even the right Art Movement. Its been three years since I touched that stuff.

[dazesanddoodles]

new sitcom featuring stuilly (yuri edition) having a Totally Normal Summer™—coming this june to an ao3 tab near you!

#initially was gonna keep this in the queue for longer but it's lesbian visibility week and i am temporarily able to be perceived #yall hear that buzzing too or is that just billy #hope nothing irreversible happens haha #guys i wish i could say im doing this for the people but that would be a lie #im doing this for me #yes they are still homicidal no need to worry #dazndoodraws #stuilly #lesbian au #listen i almost didn't but in for a penny in for a pound #spending weeks on end unsupervised in a mansion is peak hs homoerotic sapphic best friend activity i fear (i sound insane) #butterbee #stu macher #billy loomis #scream 1996 #except this is set in 1995 for reasons #scream fanart #stuilly fanart #Totally Normal Summer of 1995 #tns1995 #shorthand tag because ykt(idwtg) doesn't flow as well as a tag<3

[oddly-casual]

I’m gonna try and keep this as non spoiler-ey as I can, but one thing about Mutant Mayhem that I appreciated was that the sewers felt lonely. Every iteration of tmnt makes the lair feel lonely and isolated at times because the turtles are literally forced into hiding (except for Rise, their lair always felt like a home).

But in MM they took extra steps to make the space feel cramped and dark, no major lighting source aside from lamps, candles, and phone lights. Warm colors are scarce in the sewer and the pipes and valves take away any space they could’ve have had, not just in their home but everywhere in the sewers. It actually makes you not want to be in the sewers, because it’s all cold. Even the bars of the sewer grate look like prison bars! Every time they close the manhole cover it sounds like a door being slammed, like they are sealing themselves away.

Obviously this changes, and MM isn’t the first to do this, but it’s the first time watching anything TMNT related that I actually felt uncomfortable in the space that was supposed to be their home.

#mutant mayhem #tmnt #tmnt mutant mayhem #mutant mayhem fandom #scenery discussion #the atmosphere of the sewers feels like it was given a lot of attention #I compare it to other version only to make a point #the other sewers obviously can feel cold and empty and lifeless in different moments #but Rise made their sewers a home with warmth and space like Rise made the sewers their own it was a statement #MM made the sewers feel like a confined prison because that’s what it was they were shunned by society and locked themselves away #Even the home of the other mutants didn’t feel like a home it felt yawning and empty like they could never really have anything if their own #I’m doing my best to avoid spoilers bc I know the movie came out recently but I also loved this movie #but I also don’t want to scare people with my spoiler rambles so I’ll post those later in the weeks to play it safe

[antianakin]

@theneutralmime

Obi-Wan and Yoda have no obligations to the Rebellion. There isn't even a Rebellion to be obligated TO when they go into hiding initially. And Obi-Wan IS doing his duty to the Rebellion by protecting one of Anakin's children (they believe Anakin's children might be the only people ultimately capable of taking down the Sith, but they also know that if Anakin and Palpatine get ahold of Luke and Leia and turn them into Sith, all hope is lost). Obi-Wan also clearly has a direct communication to Bail and Breha that they can utilize in dire need, so he's not completely removed from the Rebellion.

Obi-Wan and Yoda are intended to be last resorts. They're considered public enemy #1 to the Empire and if they were out there more obviously fighting in the Rebellion, they'd be getting constantly hunted down by the Empire's full might and probably wouldn't last very long. They might even, at least in the beginning, be more of a hindrance than a help because they could draw attention to a fledgling Rebellion and end up killing it before it has a chance to grow at all. Obi-Wan and Yoda are people the Rebellion has in their back pocket for if all hope is about to be lost and they need to pull out a miracle.

There aren't enough Jedi left to force the few survivors to keep fighting on the front lines, especially when there's next to zero support to keep them from being immediately hunted down and murdered by the Empire. It helps nobody to do that. Ahsoka fights from the shadows for most of her tenure in the Rebellion, but we see in the Kenobi show how quickly Obi-Wan is discovered when he does leave Tatooine. It's a matter of a few DAYS before the Empire is on his tail and he barely manages to escape with the help of other people.

I do think that the whole purpose of Obi-Wan and Yoda being in hiding has been made a little muddied by all of the Jedi characters who have been shown to be fighting in the Rebellion (Ahsoka, Cal, Kanan and Ezra) and so now people go "well if they could do it, why couldn't Obi-Wan and Yoda?" And I get that, but I feel like it misses the point of why Obi-Wan and Yoda chose to go into hiding in the first place. They're protecting the potential future of the Jedi and the last Force sensitive children they even know are left to protect, as well as protecting themselves as potential future assets to the Rebellion and the fight against the Sith and the Empire.

#star wars #obi-wan kenobi #yoda #i started this draft a week ago and then had to run a week long event and i no longer remember if i had other thoughts #i feel like this gets my feelings on this issue across well enough still though #obi-wan and yoda did the best they could in the wake of the genocide of their entire culture #they were not obligated to keep fighting and dying for a rebellion that didn't even exist yet #and remaining in hiding doesn't mean they AREN'T doing anything helpful #obi-wan and yoda are the last remaining jedi masters that they know of too #if their culture is going to survive then they ALSO need to survive in order to pass it along to the next generation #and as far as they know in that moment the next generation is several hours old at best so there's nothing they'll be able to do for YEARS #people claiming obi-wan and yoda abandoned the rebellion or whatever are just being assholes about it

[sboochi]

Hijack week 2023 day 1: Fantasy!AU

Super self-indulgent Inheritance cycle au because I'm rereading the books (and having a lot of fun doing so, surprisingly)

Jack is the elf ambassador that carries around Toothless' egg and Hiccup is a dragon knight

#please ignore jacks hand i know the perspective is wrong #but im having a little art block and this is the best i could do #see you on the final day! #hijack week 2023 #hijack #frostcup #hiccup haddock #jack frost #my art

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Feel like making people miserable today. Anyways, here's Gon experiencing like. Textbook symptoms of trauma in the CAA, in case there was any lingering doubt about this or anything:

Initial denial that the experience happened or was traumatic

[ID: A screenshot from episode 85 of HxH 2011. Gon, eyes bright and with a smile, says "Kite is alive!" End ID.]

Flashbacks

[ID: Two screenshots from episode 95, and a third from episode 110. In the first, Kite's arm is shown in the foreground, bleeding and blurred. In the second, a close of Pitou's wide eyes, looking animalistic. In the last, puppet Kite's mangled and scarred face stares emptily ahead - the scene is greyed out. End ID.]

Intense distress at real or symbolic reminders of the trauma

[ID: Two screenshots from episode 116. In the first, Gon's fist can be seen in the foreground, with Pitou shielding an unconscious Komugi just barely seen. The narrator says "The girl lying before them brought back". In the second, Komugi has a medical respirator on. The narrator continues "images of a broken Kite to Gon's mind". End ID.]

Physical sensations such as pain, sweating, nausea or trembling

[ID: A screenshot from episode 116. Gon's fists slam into the ground as he says "That isn't fair...". Sweat drips down his arms. End ID.]

Extreme alertness/hypervigilance

[ID: A screenshot from episode 116. Part of Pitou can be seen in the foreground as Gon stares at them intensely, crouched on the ground with his arm resting on his knee, obscuring his lower face. End ID.]

Angry outbursts or other extreme behaviour

[ID: Two screenshots, one from episode 116, and the other from episode 127. In the first, Gon shouts "Is something wrong with you?!" as his face contorts with rage. His aura floats black around him. In the second, Gon, his face shadowed eerily with thin lines, says "The next time you try to delay me, I'll kill her." End ID.]

Feeling like you have to keep busy

[ID: A screenshot from episode 94. A close up of Gon's face from the side as he says "I want to focus on my training." End ID.]

Doing things that are reckless and self-destructive

[ID: Three screenshots, one from episode 95 and the other two from episode 131. The first is stylized as a black outline of Gon's figure over a background like parchment or a projector - he's been hit in the face and sent to the right from the force of the blow. The second is a close up of Gon's face, almost completely shadowed, with intense and vacant eyes - he says "I don't care". The third continues with a close up of his eye filling with darkness - "if this is the end..." End ID.]

Feeling like nobody understands ("since it means nothing to you")

[ID: A screenshot from episode 116. In a whitish-room with a crack on the wall between them, Gon stands ahead of Killua, facing away from him. They are both in shadow. End ID.]

Ignoring offers of help and shutting out loved ones... poor Killua :(

[ID: A screenshot from episode 136. A spotlight on both Killua, in the foreground, and Gon, walking away from him in the background. Killua thinks "I wanted you to ask for my help in defeating Pitou!" End ID.]

Self-loathing, self-punishment, and lack of self regard

[ID: Three screenshots, two from episode 110 and the third from episode 131. The first is a close up of Gon's face over Morel asking "When would you try to hurt yourself?" The second is a continuation. Morel looks down at Gon who is facing away from the camera as Gon replies "When I couldn't forgive myself." In the last, adult Gon, staring ahead, is animated in black and white with the only colour being the blood from the stump of his right arm. His left hand grips his shoulder. End ID.]

Blaming yourself for what happened

[ID: Two screenshots, one from episode 95 and the other from episode 130. In the first, Gon hugs puppet Kite around his waist. In the second, Gon stares blankly ahead with tears streaming down his face as he thinks "I killed Kite." End ID.]

Overwhelming feelings of anger, sadness, guilt, and shame

#all this wasn't going to fit into my gon analysis but i still wanted to cover it #when i say he was genuinely traumatized i. actually seriously mean that. #note that this does NOT mean he had ptsd!!! ptsd should only be diagnosed if symptoms continue for several weeks to a month #after being removed from the traumatic situation #given that the trauma was ongoing this does not count! we could only say he has ptsd if somehow these symptoms persist when #he's back on whale island after the fact. but honestly i doubt they would #however. in caa? yeah 100% he was very traumatized by kite's death #hence all the trauma symptoms i listed above. poor little guy :( #storyrambles #hxh #gon freecss #this post hurt me to make btw. ow. ow. #i also. cruel as it is i genuinely like that gon's trauma fueled breakdown was. not palatable. like he is genuinely really scary there #and it's REALLY hard to watch and listen to #i really get why killua felt so helpless there. #like. your best friend is incredibly fucking volatile and very obviously wants to and is intending to run himself into the ground #because he feels he deserves it #what the hell is the other thirteen year old supposed to do here. :(