#but it's a dissertation ! and on a very intimidating subject!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moon-light-jukebox · 4 years

Text

“If you want me to, I will.” [Hotch x Reader]

masterlist

Summary: Reader has worked for Aaron Hotchner for the past 6 months as the babysitter to his son, Jack.

Pairing: Hotch x (Female) Reader

Word Count: 7.4k – she thicc

Category: Smut/Fluff…and some angst because of who I am as a person.

Content Warning:

A/n: We all know that Hotch’s favorite album is the Beatles "White Album." And I have odd choices for songs that I use as lullabies. This idea came into my head and never left. This video of Billie Eillish singing part of the song is the closest to the structure of how I imagined it. Okay, okay, look, I know Roy wasn’t diagnosed until season 10. But I am taking creative liberties because I needed Jack to be younger.

Meaning this would be set around season 7. Hotch would be about 41, Jack is around 7; so, I made Reader around 26, giving them a 15-year age gap. Please don’t check my math. 😌

y/n = your name. y/l/n = your last name. italicized texts are Reader’s thoughts.

-- If you want me to, I will. --

I was disoriented when I woke up. This isn’t my bed, I thought groggily. Wait…this isn’t even my house.

“Y/n,” a deep voice rumbled beside me.

I jackknifed up into a sitting position, eyes wide and my face flushed with embarrassment. “Mr. Hotchner!” I quickly brought my hand up to my cheek to make sure I hadn’t drooled in my sleep. Because that would really be the cherry on top of my embarrassment. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to fall asleep. This is so embarrassing.”

Mr. Hotchner had been crouched down, putting himself level with his living room couch; the same couch he came home and found me sleeping on. In all the months I’d worked for the Hotchner/Brooks family, I’d never seen Mr. Hotchner smile anytime he wasn’t talking to his son, Jack. He always looked incredibly serious and sometimes incredibly sad; but the normal scowl was missing from his face as he looked at me, I noticed, watching him rise to a standing position.

“It’s fine, y/n. It’s after 1 o’clock in the morning.” He shifted, turning to go open the gun safe he kept in the part of the living room where his desk sat. Mr. Hotchner, or Hotch, as he kept telling me to call him, was the Unit Chief of the Behavioral Analysis Unit with the FBI. Which was just a very fancy way of saying he was a profiler that was in charge of all the other profilers. Some people just look like the jobs they have; Mr. Hotchner was one of those people. “Thank you for staying late, I didn’t think things were going to run this long. I didn’t even know you were here until I called Jessica a few hours ago.”

“Oh, right,” I mumbled as I began to gather my things from the coffee table and put them into my bag. “She called me a little after 4; something happened with her dad, I think.” I zipped my bag shut, standing up quickly. “I didn’t mind helping out, Mr. Hotchner.”

He made a sound that was almost a chuckle. “You don’t have to call me Mr. Hotchner, y/n. I know I’m a lot older than you, but that makes me feel ancient.”

“You’re not that much older than me,” I protested.

He looked incredulous. “Y/n, you’re still in college.”

Well, that stings a bit. “I’m in graduate school,” I said, my voice dampening a little bit. “I’m almost 27.”

Mr. Hotchner blinked at me. “Really? I thought you were younger than that…”

“My age didn’t come up in the numerous background checks you did on me?” I scoffed, immediately wincing as the words flew out of my mouth. “Oh my god, I just keep making this worse.” I slung my bag over my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Mr. Hotchner. For falling asleep on your couch…and for every moment after that. I’ll just go now.”

"Y/n," he called. "hang on, it's really late, and…I still need to pay you."

Jesus. “It is late, Mr. Hotchner, that’s why I need to head home.” I forced an awkward laugh. “I have class at 9 am.”

He pushed his hands into his pockets, regarding me in a way that made me squirm. I wasn’t used to a person paying attention to me the way Mr. Hotchner did. It didn’t make me uneasy; I just felt like I couldn’t hide anything from him…which made me uneasy. “What classes are you taking this semester?”

I don’t know why it stung so much that he knew virtually nothing about me. I’d worked for him for 6 months; he wasn’t obligated to know anything about me other than how I took care of his son. “I’m actually done with my course work this semester,” I mumbled. “I’m a TA…in a class that starts at 9 am.” It doesn’t matter, you’re just tired. “You-you can just pay me for tonight the next time I’m over. It’s not like you’re gonna stiff me.” I walked over to the door and threw a very quick “goodnight, Mr. Hotchner” over my shoulder before I scurried out.

I missed the quiet “Aaron. You can call me Aaron.”

The entire drive home, my thoughts were on Aaron Hotchner. None of this was what I expected when I took this job. I had been in graduate school for 2 years now. I had already gotten my master’s degree and had been accepted into the Ph.D. program. There are many branches of psychology, but I had always been fascinated with cognitive psychology; it seemed only natural that that is what I would pursue in graduate school. Once it became time to focus my interest in preparation for my dissertation, I decided to study the cognitive decay in Alzheimer's patients. We knew that they lost memories, but I wanted to explore how their basic cognitive functions were affected in certain settings.

As part of my program, I was a TA in an intro psych class, and I conducted my research at the hospital connected to the university. That’s where I first met Jessica Brooks. Despite getting a stipend for my teaching assistant work, I had been taking odd jobs to help make ends meet; D.C. wasn't cheap. When I mentioned that I had experience with kids, Jessica had immediately told me that she was needing help caring for her nephew in the wake of her father, Roy's diagnosis. She wanted to keep him at home, which was both admirable and time-consuming.

I wasn’t prepared for the gigantic background check that I was subjected to. I very quickly learned that my potential employer had some power at the FBI. Jessica had raved to him about me, so he agreed to meet with me. When Jessica told me he worked for the FBI, I was expecting a bureaucrat, kind of short, receding hairline, soft from sitting behind a desk all day.

Aaron Hotchner was none of those things. He was a total cliché; he was tall, dark, and handsome. His eyes were such a deep brown they were almost black, his hair was black, and he towered over me. His hand was firm when he shook mine. I initially thought he didn’t like me because of the scowl he wore on his face; now I knew that was just his default expression. I’m pretty sure he invented Resting Bitch Face. I think it was my meeting with Jack that sealed the deal. We had clicked right away. The 7-year-old was impressed by my knowledge of both DC and Marvel comics. I could still remember our first meeting so clearly; when in a move that I now know is so much like his father, he had asked me an interview question of his own.

“What is Spiderman’s middle name?” the boy had asked with a suspicious squint of his eyes.

This kid is poser checking me, I had thought with amusement. “That would depend on which Spiderman you’re referring to. Assuming it’s Peter Parker, his middle name is Benjamin.”

We were best friends after that.

I loved Jack; I really did. And I was paid well enough that he was the only child I babysat for, the rest of my time spent working on my research and plotting my dissertation. It was clear that Aaron Hotchner loved his son, and he felt guilty for not being around more. He was fierce and intimidating any other time, but once he was with his son, his entire face would transform. His smiles came easier, his eyes twinkled, and he didn’t seem so scary anymore.

None of that is why he made me nervous, though. What made me so nervous is the fear that one day I was going to spend enough time with him for him to see the feelings I had so stupidly developed for him.

The very next night, I was hiding in the kitchen floor in Aaron Hotchner’s apartment.

“Ready or not, here I come!” the little voice called out before his feet started stomping loudly across the floor.

From my position behind the kitchen counter, I tried very hard to remain silent, despite my amusement. Jack Hotchner was many wonderful, wonderful things. Sneaky was not one of them. Which is why I wasn’t surprised when I heard his little feet hurry towards me, and I didn’t lose my balance when he turned the corner and launched himself at me. “Oomph!” was the only reasonable sound to make when a tiny human slammed into you.

Jack was delighted. “I FOUND YOU!”

My response was cut off by the sound of the front door opening. Jack was off me in a flash, barreling towards the living room. “Daddy!”

Mr. Hotchner made a similar “oomph” noise when Jack jumped on him, confirming my theory. I rose to my feet quickly, smoothing down my clothes.

“We were playing hide and seek, Daddy!” Jack informed his father. “I found y/n every time! She never found me once!” His chest puffed out with pride, making my face break into a smile.

“You’re just an excellent hider, Jack-attack.”

Mr. Hotchner’s eyes settled on my face then, for just a moment I saw something so sad in those eyes that the breath seized in my lungs.

He cleared his throat, seeming to shake off whatever he was thinking before smiling at his son. “I’m glad you had a good time with, y/n, buddy.”

Jack nodded vigorously. “I helped make dinner!”

“You did?” He questioned in fake astonishment. “When did you make dinner?”

“Tonight!”

Mr. Hotchner looked at me quizzically. “Oh, um, I wasn’t actually supposed to watch Jack tonight…but Jessica called and asked if I could. It was really last minute, and she’d already bought some stuff to make dinner…” I trailed off. “I hope that’s okay. Jesus Christ, y/n. You’re a 26-year-old woman, get it together.

His attention moved from me to his son. "Jack, go get changed into your pj's. It's almost bedtime." When Jack's mouth opened to protest this great injustice, his father went on. "You can tell y/n bye when you're done."

So much for a speedy escape, I thought. Instead, I just smiled at him. "Yep, I'll be right here, little man." Satisfied with this, Jack jumped out of his father's arms and ran towards his room.

“Why did Jessica need you to come over? Did something happen with Roy?” He looked genuinely worried, walking into the kitchen to stand near me.

I reached out and put a hand on his arm without thinking. "Oh, oh god no, nothing like that." Realizing I was touching him, I snatched my hand back like he'd burned me. "Sorry. She…she-um had a date."

His eyebrows rose so high they almost hit his hairline. “A date?” he asked, disbelief dripping from his words.

I chuckled. “That’s what she told me.”

He walked back into the living room then, leaning back against the couch, crossing his arms over his chest as he focused his dark gaze on me. “What about you?”

“…What about me what?”

“Does Jessica ever have to cover for you when you have dates?”

If Aaron Hotchner hadn’t made me so nervous, I might have picked up on how he phrased that question. As it happens, all I could do was fidget under his gaze. “Oh,” I chuckled nervously. “Ah, no. She doesn’t have to do that. I don’t really date.”

That had one of his eyebrows rising, his arms crossing across his chest. "Why?"

Because I want you to crack my back like a glowstick. “Um…you know, it’s hard to find the time.”

Thankfully Jack chose that moment to come barreling out of his room, charging full force at me. “You’re still here!” he exclaimed.

I smiled down at him when his arms wrapped around my hips. I put one hand on the back of his head, the other on his back, giving him a squeeze. “Of course I am! I couldn’t leave without telling you goodbye.”

“I wish you didn’t have to go,” he mumbled.

My throat worked as a sudden wave of emotion hit me. "Oh, Jack," my voice was thicker than usual when I spoke. "I don't like leaving you either, but you'll see me before you know it. I promise."

Once we had finally pried Jack off me, Mr. Hotchner went to take him to bed. He turned to me when he scooped Jack up in his arms. “Thank you for today.”

“It’s no problem, Mr. Hotchner.”

“You know you don’t have to call me that,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine. “Most people call me Hotch. Or you could call me Aaron.”

I didn't know what to say to that; all I could do was give him an awkward smile. I was gone before he came back into the living room. I didn't want to leave, I never did, but I couldn't risk being alone with…Aaron.

The following Thursday night, my phone started ringing just after 11:30. Glancing at it, I saw it was Jessica. “Hey,” I said in greeting.

“Hey, y/n,” she said, sounding frazzled. “I have a huge favor to ask. Dad’s home health nurse had to leave early tonight.” “Is something wrong with Melinda?” I hope not. She’s the sweetest.

“No, I don’t think so. But she needs to go home and there’s no one to sit with Jack. But Aaron isn’t home yet…”

“I’ll be there in 20.”

Which is why I was now in Aaron Hotchner’s apartment after midnight in a pair of shorts that were so short I only ever wore them at home and a t-shirt that I had had for forever. Jessica had sounded so upset when she called, I hadn't even thought to change. She had promised to be back as quick as she could; she said that Mr. Hotchner was flying back from a case, and she didn’t expect him until 5 a.m. at the earliest.

When I first arrived, I had tried to watch TV, my mind too wired to sleep, even though I had class at 9 am in the morning. Sighing, I glanced over at the clock to see it was just after 1:45 in the morning.

“Fuuuuuuck,” I whined out loud. I have to go to sleep; even if it’s just a little nap. I remembered Jessica had left some chamomile tea here for the nights she stayed over to watch Jack. Finding the kettle and the tea itself was no problem; the problem presented itself when I had to get a mug to put the tea in.

I had never considered myself a particularly short person; sure, I had to stretch to get things from time to time, but everybody did that. Looking up into the upper cabinets in the Hotchner house had me reconsidering that. The mugs were on the very top shelf and try as I might, I just couldn’t seem to reach them; my fingers kept grazing over the ceramic.

“Goddamnit,” I mumbled in a huff. What is the point to put mugs way the fuck up there? Some of us are a perfectly normal height…but noooo I have to work for giants. I braced my hands on the countertop as I heaved myself up on to said countertop. Once my knees were in place, I got the offending cup without further problems.

I blame how focused I was on my task for my not hearing the front door open, or the footsteps that followed. Which is why I had a mild heart attack when I heard a voice that sounded highly amused say from behind me, “What are you doing?”

Several things happened all at once, and very quickly. I let out the most embarrassing squeak in all of history, I lost my balance on the counter and the cup fell from my hand. The cup crashed to the floor and shattered. My fate might have been the same but two large hands caught me, gripping my hips from behind. I looked down to see his long fingers wrapping around my waist, gripping me tightly; my difficulty breathing then had nothing to do with how scared I was.

“I’m sorry,” Aaron said softly, still not releasing me. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“No, I get it,” I said lightly, attempting to act like I wasn’t going into cardiac arrest because he was touching me. “You’re a very stealthy FBI agent. It was bound to happen.”

He chuckled before his hands pushed my hips so I was twisting around, my legs shifting until I was sitting on the countertop, staring into the same dark eyes I thought about far too often. They weren’t as harsh as they usually were; tonight, they were soft and warm, and they made my pulse race a bit faster.

I moved to get off the counter when the hands that were still on my hips stopped me. “Hang on, let me clean this up first. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

Fantastic, I thought, hiding my face in my hands. It seems I was incapable of not making a fool out of myself in front of this man.

He worked quickly while I debated changing my name and fleeing the country; in the next moment, he was standing in front of me again. "What's wrong?"

“Oh, nothing,” I said, not moving my hands. “Just dying of embarrassment.”

Aaron actually laughed at that, moving closer to stand between my thighs, his hands coming to rest on the countertop on either side of my hips. “Why are you embarrassed?”

I dropped my hands then. “Because this is becoming a pattern! First, I fell asleep on your couch, then I almost fell off your counter and cracked my head like an egg.” I bit my lip, shifting under his gaze. “I’m sorry and thank you for catching me.”

“I didn’t mind,” he said softly.

He still had that soft look on his face, but he was smiling too like he was enjoying my embarrassment. He probably is. I had never been this close to him before. I didn’t know his eyes weren’t just one flat color of brown, but that lighter shades of brown whirled throughout. I had never felt the heat of his body before, but now I was so close I could smell him. Why does he have to smell good? I whined internally. If he just stunk, I could get over this.

This was exactly why I tried very hard to stay as far away from him as possible because I lost the ability to think clearly whenever I was with him. I couldn't stop my eyes from moving down to his lips. I was eye level with him from my position on the counter; all I had to do to brush my lips across his was lean forward, so that’s exactly what I did. His body stiffened slightly at the first touch of my lips to his. I pulled back, ready to apologize when his hand wrapped around the back of my head and pulled me back to him. There was nothing soft about this kiss. His free hand gripped my thigh, my hands held on to his shirt, trying to pull him closer. My tongue brushed against his mouth before he sucked on the tip of it, causing me to shudder. He took a step forward as his tongue twirled around mine. I could feel him when he settled against me; he was hard, and I found myself shifting my hips to rub against him.

The shrill ringing of his phone broke us apart suddenly. He was panting, his cheeks were slightly flushed. I thought I heard him let out a “fuck” under his breath as he reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone.

“Hey Jessica,” he answered.

Now that our moment was broken, I felt very self-conscious. What the fuck did I just do?! He is my boss. He is Jack’s dad. Aaron took a step back and I slid off the counter. This turned out to be a very bad idea on my part; my body brushed down the front of his, causing me to bite my lip to silence the moan that threatened to escape.

“Yeah, I landed a little while ago,” he said as I left the kitchen.

WhatthefuckWhatthefuck. I heard him end the call with Jessica before he quickly walked into the living room. A look of relief washed over his face when he saw me. “I thought you’d try to slip away.”

“I thought about it,” I told him honestly.

“Listen, y/n, about that in the kitchen,” he began.

I held up my hands. “I’m so sorry, Mr. Hotchner. I don’t know why I did that; I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” I was giving him an out because I couldn’t handle hearing the rejection I knew was coming. “I just…I guess we got caught up in the moment? And you’re really tired, I’m sure. I’m so sorry.” I was rambling now. “If you don’t want me to watch Jack anymore-“

“Y/n, no,” he interrupted. “No, this…you’re right, it was just a heat of the moment thing. It happens. I’m sorry I lost myself for a moment.” He cleared his throat, his face still set in softness. “Jack loves you. He doesn’t need to suffer for any more of my mistakes.”

Mistakes. The word hollowed me out and left me cold. I just nodded. “Right,” I said in what I hoped was an even tone. “Just a mistake. I should get going. It’s really late.”

Which is how I found myself driving home at almost 3 in the morning with tears running down my cheeks. A mistake.

Things went back to normal after that night. I continued to avoid Aaron Hotchner at all costs and he…did whatever he did. I tried to hide the hurt whenever I did happen to see him, but it was so hard when I could still feel the tingle from his lips on mine.

A few days after the “mistake,” I was babysitting Jack again. He’d went to bed at his normal 8:30 and all was quiet. I decided to do some TA work while I waited for Mr. Hotchner to come home. I was halfway through grading an essay when I heard the first noise come from Jack’s room. Lifting my fingers from the keys of my computer, I waited to see if I heard another sound. I didn’t have to wait long; not even a minute passed before I heard a strained cry. Jumping up, I hurried down the hall to Jack’s bedroom.

Cracking the door open I called, “Jack-attack? Are you okay, little man?” I didn’t see him right away; he had hidden under his covers and curled up into a little ball. “Hey, Jack. It’s just y/n.” I sat down on the edge of his bed. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

I saw the lump under the blankets start to move hesitantly before I saw his brown hair peak out of the blanket near his pillow. His eyes were wide and with the light shining in from the hall, I could see tears gleam in them. “Oh, buddy,” I cooed. “Did you have a bad dream?”

The boy nodded. “Yeah…there was a bad man…and my daddy didn’t come save me.”

I felt my breath seize in my chest. Jessica had told me a brief version of what happened to Jack's mother a few years ago. "Jack, you know your dad would always do whatever he had to do to come to save you." I shifted my position on the bed until I was sitting beside him. "He'd never let anything bad happen to you." Jack started inching closer to me. I held out my arms and smiled when he lunged for me; I wrapped him in a tight hug, rubbing circles on his back.

“My dad just isn’t home a lot anymore. He has a lot of work to do,” he mumbled into my shirt.

“Your dad would be home if he could, Jack.” I couldn’t quite keep the sadness out of my voice. It wasn’t fair to either Jack or his dad that he had to be away so much.

“I know,” the little boy whispered. “I just miss him sometimes.”

“Do you want to call him?” I offered. “I don’t think he’d mind.”

Jack just shook his head. “No, it’s okay.” He turned his face up to look at me. “Will you stay with me?”

I moved so he lay beside me with my left arm still squeezed around him. “Of course, bud.” I scooted down the bed so I was reclining instead of sitting straight up, pulling the cover-up over him again. "Do you want me to read you another story?"

He just shuffled under his covers, looking at me with the bashful innocence of childhood. “Can you sing to me until I fall asleep?”

I wasn’t the biggest fan of singing in front of people, but how could I turn this little face down? I just nodded. “Do you have any requests?”

“Nope,” he answered with a little grin on his face.

Unfortunately, at that moment every single lullaby I had ever know left my head. I couldn’t think of a single traditional lullaby. So, I decided to improvise. I started singing slower songs I knew, some of them might not have been appropriate for a 7-year-old’s lullaby, but I don’t think Jack cared that much.

He was almost out, drifting on the edge between deep sleep and awake. My arm was still around his shoulder, he was still snuggled to my side. I decided one more song would be enough, which meant I pulled out my second Beatles song of the night.

“Who knows how long I’ve loved you?

You know I love you still.

Will I wait a lonely lifetime?

If you want me to, I will.

For if I ever saw-“

I glanced up, immediately sensing there was someone else in the room. To my horror, Jack’s father was standing in the doorway, staring at me with an unreadable expression on his face. I swallowed nervously, then I turned to press a kiss against Jack’s soft forehead before I gently detangled myself from him. I straightened my clothes that to my further embarrassment had shifted around because I was laying with a wiggly child, then, attempting to keep my face impassive, I walked to the door, moving around his father as I exited.

Mr. Hotchner walked into the room and checked on his son, while I moved into the living room to gather my things. I wonder if he just left the money by the door, I mused. If he did, I could just make a dash for the door. I mean, if he didn’t, he could always just pay me next time. Sadly, my plans were escape were foiled yet again by the man in question entering the room.

"Sorry," I muttered. "I know he was up past his bedtime. I put him down at 8, but he had a nightmare." I was babbling, not meeting his eyes, my gaze very intently focused on my bag. "He asked me to stay with him until he fell asleep…" I finally looked up, shrugged, and said, "He's very hard to say no to."

“You don’t have to apologize for being nice to my son, y/n,” he said softly. “That’s one of my favorite songs on the White Album, you know.”

I hadn’t known that. “Mr. Hotch-“

He took a step towards me before I finished speaking. “Y/n, please, I can barely handle this as it is. Please call me Aaron.”

I just blinked up at him. “So, ‘Hotch’ is off the table now?”

That had a soft smile curving his lips upward. "That was a limited-time deal. You should have been quicker." I saw his hand rise up slowly, so slowly that I would have had time to move away…but I just couldn’t. He brushed my hair back from my face, his eyes were two pools of black in the dim light, they were swirling with something that made my stomach flutter.

“Aaron,” I breathed, having no idea what I was going to say.

He let out a soft sigh, turning his eyes upwards. When he brought them back down to mine, his hand slid from its place near my ear to cradle the back of my head. His eyes searched mine for a moment before his shoulders dropped slightly. “Fuck it,” he muttered before he leaned down and sealed his lips over mine.

I might have thought this kiss would be questioning or unsure, but there was nothing unsure about it. Aaron kissed me like he was starving for me. His teeth caught my bottom lip and tugged as he pulled away. “It wasn’t a mistake,” he breathed before bringing his lips more firmly against mine.

My hands began to move over his body; one of my hands grabbed his tie and used it to pull him closer to me, the other reached up to brush against the short, soft hair on the back of his neck. “It wasn’t?” I questioned when we broke away for air.

Aaron’s lips moved across my cheek, leaving soft kisses until he reached my ear. “No, sweet girl, it wasn’t.” His mouth moved down to my neck; his kisses turning into bites that were sure to become brushes. I didn’t care, I needed him. My hands moved to his shirt, quickly trying to undo all the buttons.

His hands moved down to the waist of my jeans, deftly flicking the button open before sliding the zipper down. “Is this what you want?” he asked as his hand touched my lower stomach, his fingers brushing over the elastic band of my panties.

“Yes,” I said, still working to free him from his shirt. “I want this so much.”

The fingers of his free hand rose up to tap my chin, forcing my eyes up until I met his gaze. "I want to hear you say my name again." His other hand lifted from my stomach to slide over the flair of my hip until he was gripping my ass. "Whenever I laid in bed that night after I had you pressed against me in my kitchen when I stroked my cock, I thought about you moaning my name.” The hand that was on my chin pulled away, skimming down my body until he was grabbing the other side of my ass. “So, say it. Tell me what you want.”

“I want you, Aaron.” So, so much.

His hands moved to the backs of my thighs, then he lifted me up his body, startling me. Jesus Christ, how strong is this guy? I threw my arms around his neck as he started walking us down towards his bedroom. A giggle escaped my lips. “I could have walked, you know.”

We had already entered his room; he tossed me gently on the bed before he turned to close and lock the door. He walked to stand at the side of his bed, his eyes devouring me. “I couldn’t give you a chance to sneak away again, sweet girl.” Aaron pulled off his tie before he finished unbuttoning his shirt, shedding it on the floor.

Fuck. Fuck, he’s hot. I pulled my own shirt over my head, and his body was on top of me before it even left my hands. Aaron's mouth moved down to my collarbones, his hand slipped behind my back to unhook my bra. Once the straps were down my arms, Aaron lifted himself up on his arms to toss it away, his eyes running over my body. "You're so beautiful," he said softly like it wasn't the sweetest compliment I'd ever been paid. He leaned over again, his lips skimming down to my chest before he wrapped his lips around one of my nipples.

“Fuck, Aaron,” I moaned.

He gave my nipple a flick with his tongue before he lifted his head. “Ssh, sweet girl. You have to be quiet. Can you do that?” He kissed his way over to my other breast. “I can’t do this if you won’t be quiet.”

“I can be quiet,” I whispered right before I bit my lip to smother my moan at the feeling of his mouth on me. “Maybe.”

His breath puffed against my skin when he laughed at me. My hands threaded through his hair when he brought his face back up to mine. My mouth opened eagerly for him, my tongue slicking over his while I tried to grind my body against him. Aaron was smiling when he broke the kiss, shifting up onto his knees. “Well, I appreciate you trying to be quiet at any rate,” he teased.

My response died in my throat when his fingers yanked my jeans off my legs, bringing my panties with them. I was totally bare in front of him. His eyes raked down my body in a way that would make me self-conscious with anyone else. How could I ever be self-conscious with a man who looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing in the world?

But when he started to kiss further down my body, I grabbed his arm, attempting to pull him back up to kiss me. “Aaron,” I whispered.

He pressed a soft kiss to my collarbone. “What’s wrong, beautiful?”

“You don’t…you don’t have to do…that,” I mumbled, feeling my face heat up.

Aaron braced himself on his arms and stared down at me. Enlightenment dawned on his face a second later. He leaned down to kiss me softly. “Do you not want me to?”

I bit my lip, feeling more flustered. “It’s just…I’ve never…and I know that guys don’t really like-.“ My words were cut off when he placed another kiss to my lips, still incredibly soft, but with more force than before.

"If it makes you uncomfortable, I won't," he said quietly. "But I can assure you, I can't think of anything more I'd rather do than lick your pussy until you cum all over my face." He skimmed his lips over my cheek to my ear. "And once you've come down, I want to slide my cock inside you and feel how soft and wet you are." His kisses moved down to my neck, his mouth sucking on my pulse point. "Then I want to fuck you until you're whimpering against my lips to make you cum again.”

I felt my core throb at his words. No one had ever said anything like that to me before. He lifted his gaze when he got back to my breast, flicking my nipple with his tongue. “Is that what you want too, sweet girl?”

I have never wanted anything more, I thought; but I was so far gone that all I could do was nod.

He gave me a soft smile, moving down the bed further to settle between my thighs, pulling them further apart. I felt a kiss pressed to one thigh, then the other. His hot breath washed over the part of me that was already so wet for him. “You’re beautiful here too,” he murmured before he pressed a kiss to my clit. I lifted my hips at the sensation, causing him to chuckle and move his hands to wrap around my thighs, his arms anchoring me in place. A second later I understood why he braced my hips. The second he flattened his tongue and licked the length of my pussy, my hips started moving involuntarily and my fingers tangled in his hair.

I felt a puff of air against me when he laughed again, and it made me smile. I didn’t expect Aaron Hotchner to be fun…or dirty in bed. All thought immediately left my head when he parted me with his tongue, dipping into my entrance before spearing his tongue into me. I felt the vibration when he moaned against me. "You taste so fucking good, y/n," he said, his voice still hushed. Giving my entrance one last lick, he moved up to my clit.

He spent time moving his tongue around me, learning what made me squirm. When he started fluttering his tongue quickly over my clit my hands started tugging on his hair and my thighs tried to snap together.

“Aaron,” I whined, attempting to rock my hips against his mouth.

I think he understood what I needed better than I did. His left hand released my thigh and moved down to my heat, just below his mouth. I felt his fingers brush over me before he pushed on inside me, causing my back to arch off the bed. “Aaron, Aaron, fuck.” He added a second finger, pumping them in a rhythm that complimented the movements of his mouth.

I wasn't prepared for when his lips closed around my clit, sucking lightly, while his fingers started to curl inside of me. “Oh my God," I moaned out, louder than I should have. "Aaron, I'm going to cum." I started pulling on his hair so hard it must have hurt, but he just moaned against me, never slowing his pace. "Aaron, fuck, please. I think…I-I-“

My words broke off as the band inside of me snapped, my pussy clamping down on his fingers and my back arching off of the bed, my mouth hanging open in a silent scream.

Aaron slowed his motions, slowly bringing me through the orgasm and back down to Earth. With one final kiss to my thigh, he rose and moved up my body until his face was hovering over mine. His lips were shiny with my arousal, they also looked a little swollen, but more importantly, they were smirking at me.

I’ll give him that one. Reaching up I cradled his jaw in my hands, bringing his mouth down to mine. I tasted myself on his lips and tongue when he licked into my mouth. Despite the powerful orgasm he had just given me, I was still desperate for him. I broke away from his mouth. “Aaron, I need you.”

He pressed another kiss to my lips before he lifted up and stood at the side of the bed, undoing the buckle of his belt. My eyes were fixed on his movements, watching as he unbuttoned his slacks and slid them down his legs. His cock was a thick pipe outlined in his underwear. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband before he spoke again. "I'll give you everything you need, greedy girl." Aaron pushed his underwear down, his cock springing free before he climbed back on the bed.

He was so much thicker than I expected he would be. I moved my hand down to wrap my fingers around him, pumping his length. He let out a groan and lowered his forehead to mine. “Baby,” he muttered. “I…fuck. I have to get a condom.”

“Aaron,” I whined. “I want to feel you inside me. I’m on birth control. Please?” The thought of anything separating me from this man was abhorrent to me in that moment.

I saw his willpower crumble. “Are you sure?”

So sure. “Please,” I begged lifting my head to kiss him. “I want you to fuck me.”

With a groan that I will remember for the rest of my life, he shifted his hips forwarded, allowing my hands to guide him to my entrance. Aaron kissed me then, slowly and deeply has he started to push inside me. My hand flew away from his cock, both my arms wrapping around his body to pull him closer to me. I felt my nails digging into his back.

Aaron broke our kiss with another soft moan that sounded like my name. “I knew you’d feel like this,” he whispered, pressing deeper inside me. “I knew your pussy would be this fucking tight, this fucking hot, and so fucking soft." He started moving in and out of my pussy, going in a little further each time. “You still have to be quiet, sweet girl.”

“I’m trying,” I moaned, my pussy already starting to flutter around him when he finally pushed all the way inside of me. “Aaron, fucking Christ.” I felt him everywhere, and I somehow still craved more.

He grabbed my thigh, pulling if further up his side, allowing himself to sink deeper inside of me. “I know, sweet girl. I know.” He started a slow pace, pulling almost all the way out of me before slamming back inside me.

My head was thrashing against the pillows, my teeth digging into my bottom lip. “Aaron, I need you to fuck me harder. Please.”

He groaned at my words, placing a sloppy kiss to my mouth before pulling back. He pulled one of my legs up until it was over his shoulder, the other still wrapped around his waist, and then he started to move faster inside of me.

I braced one hand against the headboard as he pounded into me. “Oh my god, Aaron,” my voice was a low whimper as I looked down to see his cock sliding in and out of me. “You feel so fucking good.”

“Baby, I want you to reach down and rub your clit for me while I fuck your tight little pussy.” His pace started to speed up as he spoke. “Can you do that for me?” He groaned when I complied, the stimulation to my clit causing my pussy to flutter around him. “Good girl.”

My fingers began to work frantically. “Don’t stop, Aaron. Don’t stop,” I begged. “I’m so close.”

“I know, sweet girl, I can feel you. Your pussy feels so good squeezing around my cock. You’re going to make me cum.” His thrusts were starting to get choppier, one of his hands braced on the top of the headboard while the other held my leg on his shoulder. “Do you want me to cum inside your pretty pussy, sweet girl?” He groaned loudly when my walls clenched around him. “It feels like you like the idea of that, don’t you baby?”

My fingers continued their pace, my head thrashing, my body trembling. “Yes. Fuck, Aaron. Please cum inside of me. Please.”

Aaron felt it first and acted quickly; his hand moved from my leg to cover my mouth. “That’s it, cum for me, baby.”

I thought my orgasm earlier tonight was powerful. It was nothing compared to how I felt when I came around his cock, only to feel him find his own release a moment after.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, y/n,” he breathed, giving a last few jerks inside of my body, pushing against the fluttering aftershocks of my orgasm. He rolled off me, careful not to drop all of his weight on top of me. To my relief, he quickly gathered me in his arm, pulling me against his body, pressing a soft kiss to my sweaty forehead.

My ear was pressed against his chest, allowing me to hear his heartbeat slowdown from its frantic pace and his breathing even out. I turned my head and pressed a kiss to his chest while his hand continued to stroke my back.

“That…that was amazing,” I said, looking up at him. “If I knew you had that in you, I wouldn’t have run out of the room every time I was alone with you.”

He laughed softly, his eyes sparkling. “Well, at least you’ll know for next time.”

My thoughts sobered at his words. Next time

“Hey,” he said, his hand cupping the side of my face. “No, don’t go away. I just got you.” He kissed my forehead again, then the tip of my nose, then both of my eyelids, before he tilted my face up further so he could press a kiss to my lips. “We’ll figure this out. We have to. I care too much about you to let you go.”

“I care about you too,” I replied, snuggling against his chest, my eyes suddenly feeling heavy.

I was almost asleep when I heard his voice rumble again. “Will you sing Beatles songs to me when I can’t sleep too?” His voice was sleepy and teasing.

I smiled into the darkness, not bothering to open my eyes. “If you want me to, I will.”

Permanent Taglist: @rachelxwayne @pinkdiamond1016 @sickeninglyshoujo @justagirllookingforherplace @nanocoool

#Aaron Hotchner #Aaron Hotchner x reader #Aaron Hotchner imagine #Aaron Hotchner x you #Aaron Hotchner x y/n #hotch x you #hotch x reader #hotch x y/n #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #Aaron Hotchner smut #SSA Aaron Hotchner

997 notes · View notes

bvccy · 3 years

Text

Tenderness and Ferocity | 2. The Second Day

Pairing: Winter Soldier!Bucky Barnes x Hydra!Reader Fic Synopsis: The Winter Soldier is starting to make stupid mistakes in the field, which is Bucky's way of trying to wrest back control and sabotage his handlers. Hydra brings a new doctor to figure out what's wrong with him and fix it. As she spends time with him, she becomes fond of the Winter Soldier, and he becomes fond of her. Bucky has other ideas. Or, a fic in which the Winter Soldier is the good guy and Bucky is actually the bad guy. Warnings for this chapter: Angst Word count: 1488 Read on AO3: [link] [Previous Chapter] [Fic Masterlist] [Next Chapter]

"Human perfection and technical perfection are incompatible. if we strive for one, we must sacrifice the other… Technical perfection strives toward the calculable, human perfection toward the incalculable." — Ernst Jünger

"Tell me about your last mission. Why did it fail?"

"It didn't."

"Why did it almost fail." Excuse me.

"First shot missed the target."

"Mhmm... Did something get in the way?"

"No."

"Do you think it was a miscalculation on your part?"

"I don't know."

"I... See, I have no idea how shooting works." she laughed. "Did you misjudge the distance, maybe? The wind, the... trajectory?"

"No."

"So why do you think the first shot failed?"

"The shot didn't fail. I failed. And I don't know."

"But you got him the second time. So what went differently?"

"I don't know."

She thought she knew, but she needed to work him through it. A lot depended on it, and it wasn't just her dedication to her career, but to the whole Winter Soldier program. None of the other recruits were remotely as promising, their minds unhinged or too far gone, hours wasted into them and all that brilliant work. If she got it right just this once, they could do so much more, so much...

Hydra's reach tended to exceed their grasp. This led them to be overly ambitious and fail — painfully, and often. She had to remind herself that it led to growth, that perseverance in the face of your own failures was what growth was. But if she could contribute to a move in a new direction, a right direction, she will have accomplished something with her life. Even if she didn't get any credit and was never remembered, as many of the staff often weren't, at least she could have that small knowledge for herself. She certainly didn't have much else: just her job, and distant family, and colleagues that passed for friends.

"I'm going to say three words. Try to remember them: glass, gecko, charity. Say them back."

"Glass. Gecko. Charity."

"Good. And three things you can see in this room. How about... the lightbulb, that metronome over there, and the sink in the corner. Name them."

"The lightbulb. The metronome. The sink."

"Very good. Now I'm going to get you some paper and a pen." She paused mid-way from getting up to ask "Promise you won't stab me with it?"

He stopped to think, and said "I won't. ...Stab you, that is."

With a wry smile, she went to the little table on the other side of the room.

The Director agreed to give the Soldier a cell with a bunk to sleep in, some bare amenities, and now he spent his time there when he wasn't in session with her, or training (which was most of the time) . She couldn't tell if the change in environment or sleeping made any difference. But as the fabric of his speech got looser every time she plucked at it with a barbed question, she was convinced it had to matter.

They had their meetings in a completely different room, with no bars or windows, and no cameras either. It would have been intimidating to anyone else, that sort of consummate interrogation room lifted out of a dystopia, but anything was better than the sterile stench of the lab where they killed him over and over only to start him up again.

And she wasn't afraid that he would hurt her anyway, not when she reminded herself he physically couldn't disobey. The moments when she forgot about that, however...

Nevertheless, he kept almost as still as he had when he was strapped down. He didn't move more than he needed to, and didn't say more than he needed to. But in spite of everything, she felt herself slip into seeing him as just another person, as a man.

Big mistake. He's a machine, a machine, a machine.

But when she turned around and saw him waiting quietly, the body at ease, the mouth sad but relaxed, those large grey eyes tracking her, and behind them a mind so clever, so curious... When she saw him like that, she felt dirty to have ever dehumanised him.

"I want you to draw a clock for me." she said as she placed the paper before him. "Just a circle, with the hours and everything... Set the hands of the clock at sixteen past two."

She sat back down and watched him, looking at how he held her pen — how long had it been? it's not like Hydra needed him to sign any documents, so this was probably the first time he held one since... — how he drew the circle: strong, steady, with almost an artist's precision — how he set the numbers: 12, 6, 3, 9, methodical. He finished in short order and slid the paper back.

"Good." she smiled. "Very good. Now, let's turn it over and..." giving it back to him, blank face up, "let's imagine that's a map of Europe, west to east. Could you point out where Portugal would be? Where do you think... Good. And Iceland? ...Yes. How about Greece? So the Bosphorus runs where?... Good, and where's Sweden? Yes... And do you think you can point where Belarus is? Very good... Can you name their capitals for me?"

"Lisbon. Reykjavik. Athens. Stockholm. Minsk."

"Excellent." she beamed at him for one unguarded second before she looked back down and missed his school-boy smile. "What about those words from before, do you remember what they were? The words I told you to remember?"

"Glass. Gecko. And charity."

"And the things in the room?"

"The lightbulb. The metronome. The sink."

"Very good." Then she took the paper from him, put it in her folder on top of all the other notes, and tucked the pen back in.

"Did you sleep last night?" she asked pointedly, looking him straight in the eyes.

The suddenness of her question didn't seem to put him off, at first. "Yes."

"Did you dream of anything?"

"Y-yes."

"Do you remember what it was about?" Silence. "Soldier, do you remember what it was about?"

"No."

She noticed with a shudder of excitement that he just lied to her — a fraction-of-a-second twitch at the corner of his left eye gave him away. Or maybe she just imagined it...? After all, he shouldn't be able to lie. Right?

"There's nothing wrong with dreaming, you know." she prodded with deliberate sweetness, the same sort she used with the Director, he noticed with displeasure. "Even if it's about bad things... it's a sign of improvement." Silence. "And I won't tell anyone, I promise. This is just between us." Silence. "Alright, well... That's good too."

She made no effort to hide her disappointment, and the Soldier swallowed while he kept the coolth of his eyes on her. He knew she was trying to charm it out of him — and what's more, she wanted him to know she was trying. Just like he wanted her to know that he wanted bitterly, ardently to tell her.

But she either didn't notice or didn't care, and she changed her tone to that of punishing reserve. "Right then, as there's nothing left to our session today, I can let you go."

She got up briskly and gathered her things without looking directly at him, sipping glances from the corner of her eye to his right arm as it rested on the table, pale and muscular and chiselled smooth, up to the round shoulder which disappeared under the t-shirt. A glimpse, further down, of his thick legs in the black combat fatigues.

He got up and followed her as she started walking. She unlocked the room and directed him out with a nudge of her head. They went out together, the Soldier following behind her clipped steps with his particular gait, heavy boots echoing through the corridor in a strut that lilted under the odd weight of his metal arm.

As they approached the T-section of the hallway with the two guardsmen standing ready for him, another man noticed her and stopped to wait, smiling politely. He wore the same lab coat, but with an amalgam of comfy grey sweater and jeans underneath.

"Hello, Kai." she called as they got closer, a genuine smile in her voice.

"Got that report you wanted."

"It finally finished downloading? Thought it was stuck."

"Nah, it was just too big. Maybe we can apply more filters next time."

"Narrow it down, yes..."

She turned to walk with her colleague toward their offices without so much as a parting word while the two guardsmen walked him in the other direction, toward the training facilities. He spared one longing look back, and as if sensing him she turned her head and caught his eyes for one moment, before turning back to the limp-wrist scrag who had her attention.

"How's the test subject?" Kai asked with a knowing smile.

"Fine. He has... excellent neuroplasticity."

"Wow. That good, huh?"

"By the way, did your girlfriend finish her forensics dissertation yet, or...?"

"Such threats are completely unnecessary."

#Bucky Barnes #Bucky Barnes imagine #Bucky Barnes fanfiction #Bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes x you #Bucky Barnes x OFC #Winter Soldier fanfiction #Winter Soldier x reader #James Buchanan Barnes #The Winter Soldier #Tenderness and Ferocity #bv;fanfiction #Bucky x reader #Bucky x you

108 notes · View notes

blouisparadise · 4 years

Photo

Here is a list of amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of January. Between the second month of the Bottom Louis Fic Fest and all the other fics that authors posted throughout the month, it’s clear that this was a great way to start off the year of bottom Louis fics! Happy reading!

1) You Can Be The Boss Daddy | Explicit | 1641 words

This is just Louis being used and humiliated by his strong Daddy

2) Don't Pretend That I Don't Entice You | Explicit | 2086 words

“Speaking of which, he couldn't wait to get home to see him. They both worked long days and most of the time their days off didn't line up. But they made up for things like that when they could, spending hours cuddling in bed and talking about the randomest of things or ya know, having mind-blowing sex that left them sated and panting, heated limbs tangled together and breaths and scents mingling. Harry enjoyed those moments quite a bit, if he was going to be at all honest.”

3) The Sound Of Music | Explicit | 2602 words

Harry quietly makes his way down the stairs and into the large foyer, the marble floors are cold against his bare feet and he regrets not taking his slippers.

The tinkling of piano keys flirts its way to his ears and he turns his head in the direction of their living room. His mouth quirks sideways with a smile and he makes his way towards the music.

4) Letters From Boston | Explicit | 3316 words

Louis’s standing in the kitchen when he opens the first letter.

5) Starlight In Your Eyes Of Blue | Mature | 4434 words

Harry is in New York while Louis is back home at London waiting for Harry’s return. Unfortunately, Harry may be unable to come back home in time for Christmas and most importantly—Louis’ birthday. Louis can’t wait any longer to be in a bed that’s no longer empty but in the end it changes.

6) I Couldn’t Get Away From You | Mature | 5185 words

Suddenly in the heat of the moment, Harry’s eyes turned darker as he pushed Louis’ back more and more towards the wall. “Fine.” He plants his lips on Louis’ and begins to roughly kiss him, soon enough turning it into a make-out session.

“Fuck you, Styles,” Louis moans and grips onto Harry’s shoulders, hands trailing up to the taller’s hair and gripping that as well.

“We’ll see about that.”

7) My Kingdom for Your Graces | Explicit | 5257 words

Louis gets a last minute day off and Harry decides to surprise him with a visit. They proceed to do what lovers do.

8) I Think I'm In Love | Mature | 6019 words

Louis' a young man looking for love. Harry's a sugar daddy looking for a new sub. They meet through a dating app and decide to try out a relationship.

9) Daddy's Little Kitty | Mature | 7224 words

Harry Styles is a gentle master. But what happens when Louis pushes him to his limits?

10) There's More Than One Place To Call Home | Explicit | 8416 words

Harry never asked for much from his neighbors - he didn't care about barking animals during the day or loud talking during the night.

The only thing he needed was silence when he was writing. And that was the only thing his new neighbor wouldn't give him.

Deciding to confront the loud guy who lived next door, Harry found himself ringing his doorbell one night. And that decision just may be the best thing that's ever happened to Harry.

11) Cooking With Styles | Explicit | 9119 words

Anyone can cook— or so they say.

12) Watching The World Fall | Explicit | 11777 words

This segment has been going on long enough that Louis knows what’s coming before James starts in on it, trying to sell him on something he knows that Louis wouldn’t normally be buying. But there’s four cameras surrounding him, and an audience watching him expectantly, so if Louis wants to continue convincing people that he’s doing just fine, he’s going to have to go along with it.

“We have a whole host of single men backstage waiting to meet you, Louis,” James tells him. “We want to help you find love tonight, on Late Late Live Tinder. Is this okay? Do you want to play?”

It actually kind of makes sense that his first date after the break-up is going to be just as public as said break-up. Something like coming full circle.

“Alright, James,” Louis agrees, hopping down off his stool.

“Okay, come down to the stage,” James says. Louis can’t even tell whether the excitement in his voice is genuine or not. “Right now, come on down!”

13) We'll Be the Fine Line | Not Rated | 13443 words

Louis listens to Fine Line, and, drunk, he leaves a voicemail for Harry after months of not speaking. This reminds Harry of a time before everything fell apart, slowly, painfully, a time when the two of them were still in love. And he desperately wants to go back.

14) (You're Gonna See Me In A) New Light | Mature | 13631 words

A fake relationship au where everyone knows it's real but Louis.

15) Don't Know If I Could Ever Go Without | Explicit | 14140 words

“We’ve come up with a solid solution. You’re not going to like it.”

“What is it?” Louis narrows his eyes suspiciously, glancing at a visibly enthusiastic Liam.

“What if you pretended to be an Alpha?” Zayn suggests.

16) Something Wicked This Way Comes | Explicit | 16526 words

A regency murder mystery au where Louis is married to an earl and Harry is a detective. Hatchets are buried but not everyone is as they seem.

17) Keep It Sweet In Your Memory | Explicit | 17039 words

'How'd it go?' Harry pushes them into Niall's room and shuts the door behind him, so Georgia doesn't overhear.

'It was good. We just caught up, mostly... I may have done something a little stupid, though.'

And Niall's eyebrows are in his hairline at that.

'I mean. Okay, so I invited Louis out on Saturday.'

'Saturday? Your--'

'Yes, my bachelor party...' and then Harry has to explain himself, 'I just felt guilty. I think. He was like. Telling me he wanted to hook up.'

'He WHAT!?'

'No. I mean, not with me. Like. He wants to go out and meet people.'

'He'll hate that. He's too much of a romantic.'

'Yeah, well. Whatever his name was messed him up a little, it would seem.'

18) UN(RE)SOLVED | Explicit | 20873 words

The ghoul boys are back, but this time around there are some unresolved feelings involved. Harry is a skeptic, Louis is not. Watch them go on their ongoing investigation into the question: are ghosts real?

Or, BuzzFeed Unsolved AU.

19) The Way The Storms Blow | Explicit | 21649 words

Louis doesn’t have a habit of thinking about Harry’s dick.

That would be weird, seeing as they’re best mates, and they share a flat, and they’ve spent holidays at each other’s family homes. Their friendship hasn’t ever risen to a point where Louis should want to see his mate’s dick, and he’s happy to keep it that way.

Except, all that Louis can think about is exactly that. The size of it. The shape. The amount of people it’s been in.

Maybe it’s the tequila talking, or the fact that Louis’ just recently walked in to an eyeful of Harry taking turns on some slags that he’s never seen before, but. Louis’ mind can’t stop obsessing over the idea.

20) Hold Onto This Heaven (Of Yours) | Explicit | 25213 words

an ode to being too young, too sad, and too in love.

(aka: a college au, harry is a frat boy, and louis wants to know all of his secrets.)

21) Weightless | Explicit | 25330 words

He hopes that Harry still thinks of him. God knows Louis thinks of him every day.

Or: Harry is the best dragon racer the world has ever seen and Louis is an almost-vet who feels like he is carrying the weight of the world.

22) Creep | Explicit | 26092 words

Harry is a wallflower, louis is a sophomore brat with a heart of gold no one seems to notice, harry, a senior, is a musician in disguise. louis finds him in the music room, Harry performing his self written song Creep on a talent show. he steals Louis' heart and begins to stalk Harry on social media, finding out the boy is gorgeous inside and out, tattoos popping against his milky skin, unashamed of his amazing body.

a story of a boy with dark thoughts finding his way through the dark with his light guiding him.

23) Blue Lotus | Explicit | 29815 words

Note: This fic is Louis/OMC.

After the Second Rebellion and the dismantling of President Cowell’s regime, Louis struggles to make sense of life.

A post-Hunger Games AU.

24) You Contain In Your Eyes The Sunset And The Dawn | Mature | 38152

Harry Styles was to spend six months at AT&T Inc. of all telecommunications companies in the world, also known as the largest one in its field. This was the biggest deal of his life; it will both improve his expertise in the domain and maybe secure the job of his dreams. There was only one problem standing in the way, and it came in the form of a stunning, irresistible and intimidating cat hybrid of the name Louis Tomlinson. In other words, his boss.words

25) We Can Go On Forever (When Everything’s Gone Forever) | Mature | 39421

Harry spent most of his adult life focused on either his studies or his books - 5 of which he has already had published before he was 30. Immediately after completing his dissertation, he was offered a lectureship at Cambridge University where he’s been for 2 years now.

This wasn’t the first time in his life that he had felt the incessant itch to know more about a subject by any means. However, this was the first time the subject had been an Omega.

26) Canyon Moon | Explicit | 40895 words

For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry.

Then Harry’s father dies in a violent accident, and Louis’s future alpha disappears on the wind.

An A/B/O Lion King AU

27) Strangers In Love | Explicit | 42207 words

Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.

28) If You're Out There (I'll Find You Somehow) | Explicit | 55916 words

Harry looks so intensely into Louis’ eyes it’s as though he’s reaching in and touching his very soul. “I never thought… I never… I’ve been searching for so long, Louis, but I never gave up. I couldn’t stop, wouldn’t stop trying,” Harry says, bottom lip trembling as he strokes the backs of Louis’ knuckles. “I just knew that if you were out there, I’d find you somehow.”

OR the story of how one man’s love changed the world.

29) “If I Cut Out a Heart...” | Explicit | 66225 words

Stripper au! louis is a stripper who’s known for his huge ass. he works at a club owned by harry and everyone wants to fuck him. eventually louis has sex with each of the boys, separately and perhaps eventually all together in a big gang bang. lots of focus on louis’s big bum (even twerking, jiggling, etc.)

30) You Smell Like | Explicit | 185369 words

The one where Louis is the Alpha’s mate and everyone is aware of it except for Louis and Harry. Go figure!

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

#bottom louis #top harry #blp fic recs #monthly fic recs #fic recs #larry

171 notes · View notes

jpnesecurrency · 3 years

Text

The euphemism of ambition

I’ve had a lot of mentors or advisors call me ambitious. The word, which is meant to indicate a strong desire or determination to succeed, has been, to my understanding, used more as a euphemism for aiming too high, for not calibrating one’s potential with one’s ability. In the latter meaning, ambition becomes a mockery, because what you want doesn’t seem to fit into the scope of what you are able to do. Rather than imagining something possible within the future, it is as if you and the realization of such an ambition are two parallel categories to never cross. And so there were many projects in my academic trajectory, where, paired with a male mentor coincidentally, I’ve been told that my project, which I took personally to also mean me, was too ambitious. The realization of my accomplishment, of a successful version of me, was not meant, not even imaginable, for this world. I was merely a fool.

When I was suggested to consider Prof. X as a thesis advisor because I was interested in Vietnam, I looked him up on the department website. Harvard undergrad, Yale PhD. That was enough to make me dread our meeting. How could someone with his pedigree be interested in anything I had to say? I didn’t think I was worth the time of someone who had such a background. During our first meeting, it was hard for me to express, through intimidation, and probably through sheer ignorance as well, that I saw a some kind of connection behind the linguistic markers of colonialism in the Vietnamese language. I tried to bring up how fascinated I was that ‘cravate’ and ‘yaourt’ were words that we also had in the Vietnamese language. When I mentioned this connection with language, he quickly tried to pass me over to another professor whose research was precisely on linguistics. She was unavailable. He eventually agreed to my thesis advisor because there wasn’t anyone else. We scrambled to meet the deadline, which I was grateful for.

We ended up working on a novel that he recommended, a text that he had also worked on for his dissertation and book. I wrote bad outlines. I didn’t ever want to initiate meetings because I didn’t know what to prepare or to meet about. I didn’t want to be yelled at or to provoke disappointment. During one meeting, I remember being quiet and not looking at Prof. X in the eyes because I was in tears. “The French is not good. I don’t know what you are writing.” Every time I felt any kind of energy about my thesis, the flame would be quickly snubbed because I didn’t think it was interesting, or just good enough. Often, the way that I expressed myself and those ideas weren’t very clear, so it didn’t do my idea justice. I had no models for what “preparation” meant. What was good work? Clearly, I wasn’t capable of it.

I eventually turned in my thesis, got an A-, and took a picture with him at commencement. I used the paper to get into graduate school, wrote some more bad papers, had some more awful interactions with male advisors. I wrote my doctoral thesis on language, and how it was a way to negotiate ideas of freedom. Language opened up a capacity to express, think, and be, other than existing models.

I eventually did guest-speak in a few different classes on this relationship between the Vietnamese and French language; precisely on these linguistic vestiges of French colonialism present in the Vietnamese language. I didn’t know it at the time, but this was a completely viable thesis subject. It wasn’t necessarily literature, and maybe it was outside Prof. X’s area of expertise. So I figured it out, essentially and after all, without Prof. X over half a decade later.

Though, I wish he could have had the insight to invest in me. I wish he could have trusted that I had something to say, without not yet having the words.

#academia #grad school #thesis #college #french #berkeley #ambitious #ambition #underrepresented #woman of color #journey

1 note · View note

0idril0 · 4 years

Text

So... it’s been awhile, and it’s not really whump, but have some world building for my harpy.

Previous post, first post

Takes place about 3 days after Caged 2.

The door to the mansion was even bigger in the light of day.

“Fuck.”

Anoria swatted at Emric’s leg, glaring at him from her caracal form. She looked disgusted with him, but it could have been the snow. He doubted it.

“I know, I know, gimme a minute. I just need to get my mind right.”

Her unimpressed glare met his gaze and he grimaced, knowing exactly what she was thinking. He’d had two days to get his mind right.

Anoria had been pissed when they’d left the mansion. The petite Indian woman had waited for them to get to headquarters before she’d let loose, screaming and growling about listening to her cues. How she’d tried to get him to stop his approach after watching the other predator puffing his wings up in fear.

Looking back on the night had guilt swirling in his gut again. He hadn’t listened, too interested in getting his hands on the harpy, just once, to say that he had. The screech from the cowering harpy had been powerful, the flapping of wings terrifying, but what was even worse was the way Murdock had struck the harpy down, blood splattering on the floor. The terrified wail as it was dragged away.

And now he was going to have to go in there and do it again.

Fuck, he was going to be sick.

“We’ve got this, we’ve got this, it’ll all work out just fine...” he took a fortifying breath and rang the doorbell, listening to the impressive gonging noise coming from inside. “We’ve got to have this.”

The plan wasn’t even a plan. It was just gain Lachlan’s trust and learn what they could. If they were lucky Anoria would be able to sneak away and snoop. That still didn’t help him.

Emric scrubbed at his face and took a breath, setting deep within himself waiting for the doorman. The worst part is that it wouldn’t even be hard for him, especially since the subject in question was a male harpy. He’d written his dissertation on supernatural creatures with an emphasis on harpies. It was why he’d been contacted for the job with SPCA, so he could help with the conservation of the supernatural species they would come across.

It was just such a big opportunity, and it made him sick that he was so excited about it.

By the time the door opened his gut was in knots, but his face was relaxed and open to meet the piercing gaze of Lachlan’s butler.

“Mr. Roland Moore, I presume?”

Emric hoped his answering smile and confirmation were just as oily as they felt, it was the only way Lachlan would trust him.

“Please, follow me, Master Murdock has asked that you meet him in the den.” The doorman was stiff, barely looking at them after he’d taken Emric’s coat.

Emric followed slowly, hoping the man wouldn’t notice him peeking through every open door. They’d need a solid map of the place if they ever decided on a full force raid on the property, and, at the moment, he and Anoria would be the only ones able to get it.

It took a solid ten minutes for the doorman- or was he a butler?- to walk them to the den. Emric almost had to reach up and close his mouth, shocked at the number of extremely expensive/ highly illegal items that were stowed away in just the places they’d passed.

Anoria obviously wasn’t pleased at his gaping, claws digging into his ankle as he stared at the room the butler opened. Emric hissed at the sharp pain, but reaffixed the aloof expression of his alternate persona as the butler guided them into the den.

“Sir, make yourself comfortable, Master Murdock will be with you shortly.” The butler bowed-fucking bowed-before turning to walk from the room with a precision that made Emric hold back a snort.

He and Anoria shared a look of trepidation before taking in the den they’d been led to. The den wasn’t as large or opulent as the elegant gallery room the party had been held in, but that didn’t mean it was any less intimidating.

“Anoria, we’re not in Kansas anymore...”

Rows and rows of bookcases lined the walls, shelves heavy with old books. Overstuffed armchairs that looked more expensive than his lives salary sat in front of a crackling fire places.

There was... a cage? On the fire place? He knelt down and unbuckled Anorias leash, his partner darting away to investigate the closest set of bookshelves. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the fire place though, brain registering something off about it even through the cage.

“Holy shit.....” A fire salamander rolled in the hearth, sitting between two of the crackling logs. The salamander noticed his staring and cocked its head, a molten tongue coming out and licking over it’s blazing eyes before it scurried deeper into the logs, wood crackling.

Emric shuffled forward, crouching to get a better look at the creature. They were supposed to be able to emit heat equal to that of lava, living in volcanoes. Twelve hundred Celsius. His fingers itched for a note book, a napkin, something so he could jot down what he was seeing. He couldn’t even risk pulling his cell phone out here, the app he was using to record everything would get messed up, but god he wanted to take picture of the salamander. Or well, anything actually, maybe he would have time for just one-

“Fascinating, isn’t it?”

“Ahh!” Emric yelped, jumping to his feet- bouncing to catch his balance. Lachlan stood behind him, an unreadable expression on his face as he watched Emric flail. He struggled to smile, feeling his face flush at the scrutiny. “I’m so sorry, I couldn’t help myself.”

Lachlan’s face smoothed, a smirk adorning his features. “No need for apologies, that’s why you’re here right?”

A small bolt of fear crawled up his back at the statement, but he banished it as soon as he felt it. Lachlan couldn’t know that the supernatural creatures were why they were here, they’d spent at least an hour after the harpy’s removal discussing trade deals for large exotic cats. Lachlan, it seemed, had been looking for a specific type of panther, and Emric was supposed to be the man to talk to. It was as good a reason as any to be at the party, and the SPCA had been adamant that the cover would hold.

“That and the training you mentioned.” Emric felt the sleazy smirk slide into place even as he tried to hold back a sneer. “Though, I can’t lie, I’ve been looking forward to seeing the harpy again. It’s a fascinating creature, just like everything you seem to have here. It’s amazing what you’re able to do with them too, the wood elf you brought out was especially well behaved.”

Lachlan huffed, an uncharacteristic leer on his face as he knelt down by the fireplace. “Most of my male guests like my wood elf, you should see her dance, truly a sight.”

The waggle of Lachlan’s eyebrows made Emric taste bile, but he smirked instead of showing his disgust, “Oh, I’m sure that’s a sight to behold.”

“Regardless of her popularity, she isn’t my favorite acquisition.” Lachlan opened the cage to the fire place as he spoke, settling a long fingered hand at the opening of the cage. “When I bring her out some of my guests tend to be put out due to her humanoid appearance and I wind up in debates about keeping her in my menagerie. Like she’s a human that I’m keeping captive. “

Lachlan turned to him a question in his eyes, like he was asking if Emric thought the same.

He quickly arranged his face into a commiserating smile, recalling Lachlan bemoaning like conversations during the party. “There are those that think supernaturals should be free, that they have just as much personality and feeling as we do.”

Lachlan’s face contorted into a revolted grimace, reaching into the fireplace to grab the salamander. It immediately stopped glowing, every flame disappearing as it curled around the man’s hand. He held the salamander out to Emric; a challenge in his gaze. “They’re nothing more than animals, amazing animals, yes, but animals. To think otherwise is fallacy. What they once considered magic, we now know to be science beyond the understanding that they had. Humanity is the top of the food chain for a reason, and that’s to keep them in line.”

Emric chuckled, suddenly nervous. “I still don’t know how you get them to behave like that, I can’t even get my caracal to behave, and she’s far from supernatural.” The lie rolled off his tongue easy, practice made perfect.

“You have to understand them. A being made for fire placed in a wet and cold environment after it misbehaves will learn to avoid certain behaviors that lead to it being there.” Straightening, with the salamander still clutched in his hand, Lachlan gave Emric a challenging glare and held the creature out. “You can’t think of them as more than animals, you must be their Master. Otherwise they will never do what you say. Go on, take it, it won’t hurt you.”

The salamander was inched from his hands, and Emric could feel the sweat beading his palms as he cupped them around it. When it hit his hands he hissed and then gasped, shock rushing through him. It was warm, like a hot mug of coffee.

“Do you know why people come to me, Roland? It’s not for the finery, it’s not the supernaturals. Its the feeling of power. It’s because here, its mankind at its highest, Masters over the world, over the elements and the wild things. We are gods here.” Lachlan finished his speech with fire in his voice, an unholy light in his eyes.

Emric was suddenly very, very afraid of the man in front of him.

#avian whumpee #even though hes not in this one #world building #emric is roland moore #cause hes undercover #lachlan is insane #and stupid rich #my ocs #supernatural creatures

27 notes · View notes

july-19th-club · 4 years

Note

how did you first get into tarot? do you have any advice for someone who wants to learn?

i got into it in college when i was doing a bit of exploring around in terms of what i guess you’d call ‘witchy stuff’ - i’m not super involved in it much at all because like all hobbies there’s lots to dive into and i’ve always been just enough of a skeptic that im never sure if what im doing is working or not (also because as a community at least online, the modern witch zone has some problems with racism and TERF-adjacent ‘woman power’ shit and i am not about a) appropriating cultures i’m not a part of’s magical or spiritual traditions or b) associating with gender essentialists not least bc i dont ahve an essential gender). ALL THAT just to say when i was in college i thought tarot reading might be fun and i bought a cool pack with some artwork i liked, and then was gifted some other decks by friends etc. there are lots of beautiful (very expensive) decks out there - some of the fancy ones can run you like $50-60 easy - but you can get a basic rider-waite deck online for like 20 bucks.

the main thing to keep in mind about tarot is that whether or not you have much of a belief in that certain whatever-you-want-to-call-it (magic? the paranormal? words like that always feel WAY too dramatic to me an ex-catholic wary of anything that smacks of hardcore spirituality way) - your tarot deck is just cards, and it’s essentially an intuition tool. whatever you wind up reading is gonna mostly come from you - your interpretation of the cards, your interpretation of the questions you ask. and sometimes you’ll surprise yourself with the insight you glean off of that and you’ll get that cool uncanny ‘i’m onto something here’ feeling and sometimes you’ll just read a spread distractedly and get nothing out of it and just feel like you’ve wasted your time. either way, it can be a great way to sort out your own thoughts, which is mostly what i use mine for. i guess you could call it mindfulness in a way. when i draw a card and know that it either clarifies my thoughts or doesn’t make any sense for what i’m feeling, both of those answers can be helpful ways to narrow down complicated thought processes. if i’m feeling confident about a decision and i draw “The Chariot” for example, that doesn’t necessarily mean that some outside force is agreeing with me that i should do whatever im about to do. probably nobody else is giving me advice from beyond or influencing the cards i draw. but it does maybe mean that i’m not just tricking myself into feeling confident; it might mean that subconsciously (or consciously) i know i’m on top of whatever i was asking about. for someone with a degree of imposter syndrome, that can really help.

this is turning into a bit of a dissertation and you said you wanted tips, so bear with me :) my main tip is to buy a cheap deck (you can always buy a pretty one later) and to spend time with it. lots of people say that, but it’s like learning any new skill or subject - you’ll be more familiar with it and it’ll be more intuitive if you practice. the deck should come with a little book that tells you the commonly agreed-upon meanings of each card and what suit it belongs to (major arcana are for big themes and questions, minor - suits are wands, cups, coins or pentacles, and swords - are for more everyday garden-variety stuff). the book should also have some spread ideas in the back - by which i mean ways in which to lay out the cards and designate questions to each of them.

a simple spread, for example, might look like this: three cards in a row, which you designate past, present, and future. you could consider the spread broadly - the past encompassing a long time, present encompassing every aspect of your current life, future encompassing everything - or you could do it minutely; this morning (past) right now, and tonight (future). another thing everyone always says is not to be afraid to build your own spreads. if you feel like they’re not working or you’re not putting together any clear insight, you can always adjust them or go back to the ones in the book (if you find those work for you) or look some up online.

few other things i’ve noticed help you to achieve “clearer” results from a reading:

yes or no questions or extremely big, broad categories are troublesome. “how,” “what,” and “why” questions, or questions that allow for open-ended answers, are more likely to help you form a conclusion that makes sense

basically, you know how lawyers ask leading questions? this is NOT like that. if you do a spread full of leading questions, you’re just leading yourself in a circle

i’ve noticed that if i read for the same question over and over again all at once, the cards i flip get more and more nonsensical. either the deck’s getting tired of my bullshit, or i’m losing the ability to coherently interpret what’s in front of me - either way, i think past a certain point there’s no reason to beat a dead horse

^ the above leads me to a tangent which i SWEAR is related, tangent being i just said all that stuff about there not being any outside force directing your readings. still think that’s probably true unless you do spirit work about it on purpose, which i know nothing about and probably never will - but one of my few ‘i’m pretty sure i believe this’ beliefs is a bit of mild animism; the idea that objects as well as creatures have something akin to a soul or a personality. im not sure how distinct or clear or ‘real-in-the-way-that-you-and-i-who-are-living-human-beings-are-real’ those *souls* are, but the few hard and fast i-can’t-explain-it experiences i’ve had have been to do with places that felt like they Had Emotions and objects that felt like they Had Intent. and if you do subscribe to the line of reasoning that everything has a beating heart of *being-ness*, then things you spend lots of time with and interact with will probably come to some kind of understanding with you and/or you will influence each other a bit.

SO when the deck seems to be throwing unrelated cards at me after i start reading for the same thing over and over, or when reading for an anxious topic nets me reassuring cards, or when i truly do start a reading baffled and finish it clarified, the part of my mind that is a little less skeptical imagines that the deck and i, having spent some time together, are capable of maybe, just possibly, reading each other. and that magic is potentially, POTENTIALLY, in a barely tangible way, happening.

last thing: also everyone says this, but it bears repeating: don’t be intimidated by Death; it’s a card of transition really. and don’t let scary readings make you feel intimidated or scared or depressed. your readings are a reflection of your own emotional states and thought processes, and like smart seers in stories like to remind characters all the time, what you see is just one possibility and you have the power to change it if you don’t like what it shows.

#kind of weird an atheist skeptical ex-catholic being this into tarot readings #but look i have special interests okay!#hope this wasnt too much of a novel #for me tarot really helps me clarify my own circuitous thought patterns #like a meditation tool or a bullet journal #but also sometimes it really does feel a teensy tiny bit like maybe Something's Going On #Anonymous

10 notes · View notes

wanna-b-poet31 · 5 years

Text

An (I should really retitle this series) 4-part Good Omens Meta Part 5: An Angel in Recovery

~~~Hey, look at me back at it again talking about abuse in Good Omens~~~

So like real talk, I could write a whole damn book on just trauma studies with Aziraphale and Crowley. Like no joke, I’m drafting my dissertation on disability and trauma. Expect at least 2 more parts of this multi-layered Meta because I have all the thoughts. #sorrynotsorry for how long this one is.

An Overview of Recovery

One of the things I just can’t get over is the ways in which Crowley and Aziraphale’s relationship enable each other down the path of recovery from their respective abuse

I’ve been throwing around the word “recovery” pretty freely in my other installments. So, before dissecting their relationship, we need to know: what exactly DOES a recovery from an abusive environment actually look like?

Generally speaking (and I mean like really, really generally), trauma recovery has 3 goals:

establishment of safety,

remembrance or mourning of abuse,

the reinstitution of self/ sense of individual normalcy

It’s important to note that most recovery paths are non-linear and deeply personal. Meaning, no two paths are the same not even if they’ve undergone similar trauma or trauma from the same source/event. Some practitioners will cite as many as 10 steps, while others still say recovery is reached when the survivor shift from a place of unpredictable abuse/trauma to a place of safety >SOURCE <.

Aziraphale’s Recovery Needs

Throughout the series, Aziraphale is constantly threatened, subject to unsafe work/family dynamics, and forced to endure emotional abuse. Heaven’s stakes are unconscionably high, unfairly looming over the angel’s head. He constantly has to deal with the threat of falling, coupled with the constant belittling, and dismissive nature of the other Angels. His environment makes it hard for Aziraphale to recognize that Heaven is abusive. It doesn’t help that his primary coping skill is denial and repression. As long as he can’t recognize the problem, he simply can’t address the underlining issues causing his problems.

Consequently, he doesn’t acknowledge that Heaven isn’t the perfect, righteous power he thinks it is. Heaven isn’t safe. It’s violent, unforgiving, and more than willing to drop him like a rock. There is no security if something as small as asking questions, or loving Humanity (his job) is grounds for falling or permanent death. Yet, this is the place he idolizes, above even his lover best friend.

He can’t even consult other Angels to form his own sense of security in Heaven. None of the relationships we see (excepting Crowley) offer him solace, comfort or anything but abuse. If we include his human alliance with Shadwell, there’s another layer of homophobic abuse piling on his emotional abuse and physical intimidation.

To heal, Aziraphale’s recovery journey has five distinct stages: self-identification of his abuse, securing a safe space, confronting his abusers, cultivating a healthy relationship (with Crowley), and embracing his sense of self.

Abuse By Any Other Name

Aziraphale needs to come to terms with the trauma inflicted upon him by Heaven. And this isn’t to say he doesn’t notice that Gabriel is cruel to him, or that Sandalphon is about .25 seconds away from smiting everything and that’s dangerous, but he denies that these behaviors are inherent problems. Their behaviors, particularly toward him, his interests, and his loves are not respected, but he still treats them like unquestionable authorities. Admitting that there is a problem in the power dynamic, or at the very least the terms and conditions of Heaven are unjust, is the first thing Aziraphale needs to do to begin recovering from his toxic environment and toxic relationships.

Now, we do see Aziraphale push against his system of abuse, he lies to God for one thing, and maintains a relationship/agreement with Crowley for another. But his rebellions still regards Heaven above all other relationships. It is still where he claims his loyalties lay. Until he can admit that Heaven does not have his best interest at heart, he can’t undo their damage.

I argue that the first step in Aziraphale’s recovery is when he admits that he has a problem with the end of the world. It’s not a full admission of Heaven’s fault, but it is an admission that when he does not feel comfortable with Heaven’s actions he should and CAN intervene. Before, with Noah and Jesus, he watched, even though he objected and was horrified by the actions against innocence. We see this again when he seems visibly upset with “all the smiting” that Sandalphon does at Sodom and Gamorah. Despite his misgivings, he doesn’t intervene (at least not on-screen). Look at the below gif. He’s clearly pained by God’s decision, but he bites his tongue. It’s not that he doesn’t want to question, it’s that he can not question. He must soldier on.

We can see that when Gabriel brings up the possibility of “something big is coming”, he is visibly perturbed. Then, once Crowley tells him about the coming of the Anti-Christ. He recognizes that his love for humanity and his life on Earth is a tipping point that he’s unwilling to give up. But, he still does it by operating within the framework of Heaven.

The next crack happens when Aziraphale realizes Heaven is unsupportive of his efforts to save Heaven. His face visibly falls when Michael says they’ll forgive him for is an inevitable failure. He’s also upset by Gabriel who does give him encouragement, but in a tone that is clear, he thinks Aziraphale’s efforts are fruitless. Heaven makes it clear that war is more important than love for God’s creatures.

Then Aziraphale goes to Heaven, wielding information about the Anti-Christ. He knows where Adam is, he knows the beast is released, and he knows that Armageddon is days, if not hours, away. Yet, he falters. He’s all anxiety and nerves when he’s forced to talk to his so-called “side”, in a way he’s never like with Crowley. But this scene’s pièce de résistance is his choice to lie about the location of Adam. After first mentioning Crowley and all his wiles, he suddenly becomes uneasy. Gabriel asks “where” and Aziraphale recognizes that no one in the room cares about protecting humanity. Now, instead of the end of the world being his biggest problem, Angels (not yet Heaven) are. This is further supported by their intimidation of him after the break-up on the bandstand.

While this scene is certainly progress towards naming his problem, he’s not all the way there yet. He meets with Crowley, and Crowley scares him because he’s not ready to admit Heaven is intrinsically abusive the same way Crowley is. He still believes that Heaven, and the angels, are on his side, that they’re doing right. He’s mortified about the very realy possibility that if he chooses Crowley, he’ll lose his divinity. His later scene summoning Metatron shows that he believes so badly that if he can only get ahold of God, everything will be sorted. But, it isn’t.

It is only when he recognizes “hello god, it’s me Aziraphale” won’t get him shit, that HEAVEN is his problem. Not Crowley, not angels, not Hell, but Heaven is his abusive parent and he needs to pick which side he wants to be on.

So he chooses Crowley.

Sanctum Sanctorum

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it 100 times. Heaven is an empty, cold, and unloving place. There is no joy in its walls. There is no love for the Angels who dare enter. It’s a place where the Archangel Fucking Gabriel is willing to burn his “traitor” in a fire without a trial. In short, it’s unsafe. Aziraphale is, at the very least, unsafe their. Unsafe from judgmental eyes, unsafe from intimidation, and physically separated from the rest of the angels during every meeting.

Soho, in contrast, is very different. It’s very clear that Aziraphale’s shop is warm and alive with love. It’s where Aziraphale eats, prays, loves, and lives. He knows, even before he can name his problem, that Heaven isn’t home. So he creates one, a little oasis where he can invite Crowley for drinks, he can maintain his ever-growing book collection, and center himself.

He is safe here, on Earth, because it’s of his own choice. Agency (or the ability to make choices) is crucial for coping with trauma. It empowers survivors to maintain their recovery and help give them back control over their lives. In Heaven, Aziraphale has no agency. There is no food for him to taste, no lover best friend to go on dinner dates with, no books to quench his thirst for knowledge. In his bookshop though? He has all the freedom to be as hard or soft as he pleases, read whatever he pleases, eat or drink whatever he pleases, and love whomever he pleases, without fear of discipline.

It’s VERY important to note that 1 solitary character respects his sanctuary -- Crowley. Gabriel and Sandalphon barge in unannounced frequently, belittle his work and expect him to drop everything at a moment’s notice. Shadwell breaks and enters, calls him homophobic slurs and “kills” him. Sure Crowley miracles the locks open unannounced, but it’s only when the shop’s on fire and damn it Crowley has an Angel to save.

Every other character, except Crowley, belittles Aziraphale’s love of books and food, and warmth. Where other characters barge into his home uninvited, Crowley always asks express permission (minus when he’s being an action hero) to enter Aziraphale’s inter-most place of safety. Unlike everyone else, Crowley respects and loves Aziraphale enough to help him maintain a place of safety from the abuses of Trust they both find in Heaven.

The One Where Gabriel’s a Dick And Aziraphale Says FUCK YOU to Hell

Aziraphale realizes that the line between Heaven and Hell’s abuse is a fucking thin one. They team up to actively destroy the two things he loves and has been gaslighting, attacking, or traumatizing him to do it. As a way to start coping with the tremendous loss and trauma inherent in Armageddon't he comes to terms with his abusers.

There are three distinct moments where he does this. First is to Shadwell. The idiot of a man is constantly berating him, a presumed ally, with homophobic slurs. While ultimately a small moment, it’s one that Aziraphale desperately needs to confront if he has any hope of confronting his other abusers. When Aziraphale faces Shadwell, he does it with so much style. Not just does he reclaim the homophobic slur, but he also puts Shadwell in his place for using it in the first place. Honestly, Michael Sheen and Miranda Richardson deserve Awards for their performance here.

The second biggie is when he stands up to (the bastard archangel) Gabriel. Although I don’t doubt Aziraphale could cut someone with his flaming sword, his most powerful weapon is his words. He defends Adam’s choice to not destroy the world and confronts Gabriel’s use of the “great plan” vs. the ineffable one. Aziraphale knows that poking at Heaven’s excuse for destroying humanity won’t hold up. There is no rationale for waging war except “to see whose gang’s the best”. Speaking up like that, against a director of war, is ballsy, but Aziraphale does not care. He needs to confront the horrendous way Gabriel/Heaven has treated him, humanity, and Crowley.

And who supports him through this cathartic moment? Crowley. With a single glance, Crowley interjects and comes through, supporting Aziraphale’s (actually really clever) plan to protect Adam and the world. Crowley realizes Heaven and Hell don’t actually know what they’re doing, and that Aziraphale has them dead to right. Stepping closer to Aziraphale, protectively behind Adam, he pushes until Heaven and Hell are forced to admit defeat.

It’s a beautiful confrontation. A perfect Fuckkkkk you to 2 abusive entities.

The third distinct moment is the switch. While Hell specifically hasn’t actually targetted Aziraphale, they have done something worse. Attacked his support system. So, Aziraphale returns in kind, confronting his partner’s abusers head on. And look at the absolute GLEE he takes in showing off how indestructible to Holy Water his partner is. He’s making a performance of daring all of Hell to come after them, terrorizing them like they terrorized Crowley and him.

It’s also him coming to terms with the fact that yes, it’s him and Crowley against the (divine) World. The switch is so significant for so many reasons, but the primary one is that it allows Aziraphale the ability to face his biggest fear -- Hell -- and not flinch. The Threat of falling (like from Uriel/Michael/Sandalphon) and going to Hell terrifies our loveable bastard angel. He knew that he was disposable to Heaven, but he’s indisposable to Crowley. This confrontation allows him to come to terms with the unhealthy power dynamic of Heaven and begin the rest of his life with Crowley as equals. He’s not fully recovered (recovery is a process, not a finish line) but he’s faced all of his abusers.

Our Own side

His relationship with Crowley is the only damn thing that Aziraphale can always rely on. Heaven’s love is conditional. Humans live short lives compared to Azi’s immortality. And Hell wants him dead simply because he’s an Angel.

But Crowley? Dammit. Crowley will run into a burning building to save him. He’ll run into a church to save him, and then save his books because Crowley knows Aziraphale would forget. He’ll race to France DURING A REVOLUTION, to a PRISON to rescue Aziraphale. He’s Aziraphale’s constant companion, and really the only support he can always trust.

Crowley is the one to pull Aziraphale out of his abusive environment, enable him to act in the face of injustice, and support him as he faces down his abusers. He also respects the angel’s boundaries consistently, and while he’s been accused of going too fast, he’s patient, never pressuring Aziraphale to do something he’s truly uncomfortable doing. Normally, it’s already something Aziraphale wants to do, but can’t rationalize a reason to do it that would allow him to disobey Heaven. All the way up until shit hits the fan does Crowley refrain from making Aziraphale uncomfortable, and even at the breakup scene, Crowley forces it because he knows Aziraphale has to make a choice. Him or Heaven.

But, it’s Aziraphale choice and Crowley REFUSES to make it for him.

Heaven never consults Aziraphale on policy decisions, never initiates open communicates with Aziraphale, and certainly never treats Aziraphale as an equal. Crowley does. Crowley could easily have forced Aziraphale into his car and flew to Alpha Centurai. He could have forced Aziraphale to go with him in the bandstand. He could have forced Aziraphale to do any number of things without his consent, but he chooses not to. He chooses to be the honest entity Aziraphale needs in his life. He chooses Aziraphale, just as Aziraphale chooses him.

Even when they’re arguing, they share strong conflict resolution skills. Either they choose to talk it out unit they reach an understanding or, Crowley gets some fresh air, before consulting Aziraphale again. There is one moment when Crowley calls him stupid with any real bite to it, and it’s because Aziraphale, who is so close to admitting he has a problem, and that problem is Heaven, can’t make the last leap. Crowley, for the only time in the series, really insults Aziraphale because he needs one last ditch effort to take off the blinders, preventing Aziraphale from recognizing his trauma.

And after that? When Crowley is heartbroken and rejected for the second time? He still goes looking for Aziraphale. Unwilling to let anything damage the integrity of their relationship.

Crowley’s acts of kindness and love allow Aziraphale to finally recognize his past was unhealthy. But more than that, Crowley fulfills all the criteria needed for a healthy relationship according to The National Domestic Abuse Hotline.

And A Nightingale Sang in Berkley Square

So What does this all mean? Where are we left at the end of the series? In a pretty good place actually. I said the final step was establishing a sense of self. Where was he before the abuse started? Or, if that’s impossible to know (given our data) What does he want his new normal to be?

A life with Crowley.

It’s clear that when Crowley invites him to stay at his place (if Aziraphale likes) the night of Armageddon’t, Aziraphale does because they both deserve. There’s a slight smile when Crowley offers, and like in 1941, the romantic music swells. Only half-heartedly does Aziraphale say his side wouldn’t like it, but both of them know they’re on each other’s side. Not Heaven. Not Hell. Just them.

Quite simply, he’s already told us what he wants moving forward. He wants to be with Crowley, perhaps one day the could go for a picnic, or dine at the Ritz, but always together. So, he does.

Recovery is not a destination, it’s a process. Thanks to Aziraphale’s healthy support system that is Crowley, he is able to start his recovery journey and end the series in a much healthier place than it started. Aziraphale is not “cured” by the end of the novel, but he is coping, and he is recovering. So long as Crowley’s by his side, he’s well on his way to healthy coping mechanisms, and living in a safe, loving environment with a partner who loves and respects him.

TLDR: Aziraphale is recovering from 6000 years of abuse and trauma. Crowley loves, supports, and helps heal him on his journey.

For More on this Series:

In Part 1 I wrote about how Heaven is hella abusive towards Aziraphale, but Crowley’s love facilitates his recovery

In Part 2 I wrote about how traumatized Crowley is, but thanks to Aziraphale’s love which facilitates Crowley’s recovery

Part 3 is the one where Aziraphale Has some Dubious Coping Skills

Part 4 looks at Anthony J. Crowley’s Poor Coping Skills+ the One Surprisingly Healthy One

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk

333 notes · View notes

dewwater2 · 4 years

Text

How to structure a nursing dissertation

A nursing dissertation or thesis is a long piece of academic writing based on original research, submitted as part of a doctoral, master’s, or bachelor’s degree. Your dissertation is probably the longest piece of writing you’ve ever done, and it can be intimidating to know where to start. This article helps you work out exactly what you should include and where to include it. You can also download our full dissertation template in .docx or Google Docs format. The template includes a ready-made table of contents with notes on what to include in each chapter. You can adapt it to your own requirements. Table of contents  Deciding on your nursing dissertation structure  Title page  Acknowledgements  Abstract  Table of contents  List of figures and tables  List of abbreviations  Glossary  Introduction  Literature review / Theoretical framework  Methodology  Results  Discussion  Conclusion  Reference list  Appendices  Editing and proofreading Deciding on your dissertation’s structure Not all nursing dissertations are structured exactly the same – the form your research takes will depend on your location, discipline, topic and approach. For example, dissertations in the humanities are often structured more like a long nursing essay, building an overall argument to support a central thesis, with chapters organized around different themes or case studies. But if you’re doing empirical research in the sciences or social sciences, your dissertation should generally contain all of the following elements. In many cases, each will be a separate chapter, but sometimes you might combine them. For example, in certain kinds of qualitative social science, the results and discussion will be woven together rather than separated. The order of sections can also vary between fields and countries. For example, some universities advise that the conclusion should always come before the discussion. If in doubt about how your thesis or dissertation should be structured, always check your department’s guidelines and consult with your supervisor. Title page The very first page of your document contains your dissertation’s title, your name, department, institution, nursing degree program, and submission date. Sometimes it also includes your student number, your supervisor’s name, and the university’s logo. Many programs have strict requirements for formatting the dissertation title page. Acknowledgements The acknowledgements section is usually optional, and gives space for you to thank everyone who helped you in writing your dissertation. This might include your supervisors, participants in your research, and friends or family who supported you. Abstract The abstract is a short summary of your dissertation, usually about 150–300 words nursing essays. You should write it at the very end, when you’ve completed the rest of the dissertation. In the abstract, make sure to:  State the main topic and aims of your research  Describe the methods you used  Summarize the main results  State your conclusions Although the abstract is very short, it’s the first part (and sometimes the only part) of your dissertation that people will read, so it’s important that you get it right. If you’re struggling to write a strong abstract, read our guide on how to write an abstract. Table of contents In the table of contents, list all of your chapters and subheadings and their page numbers. The dissertation contents page gives the reader an overview of your structure and helps easily navigate the document. All parts of your dissertation should be included in the table of contents, including the appendices. You can generate a table of contents automatically in Word if you used heading styles. List of figures and tables If you have used a lot of tables and figures in your dissertation, you should itemize them in a numbered list. You can automatically generate this list using the Insert Caption feature in Word. List of abbreviations If you have used a lot of abbreviations in your dissertation, you can include them in an alphabetized list of abbreviations so that the reader can easily look up their meanings. Glossary If you have used a lot of highly specialized terms that will not be familiar to your reader, it might be a good idea to include a glossary. List the terms alphabetically and explain each term with a brief description or definition. Introduction In the introduction, you set up your dissertation’s topic, purpose, and relevance, and tell the reader what to expect in the rest of the dissertation. The introduction should:  Establish your research topic, giving necessary background information to contextualize your work  Narrow down the focus and define the scope of the research  Discuss the state of existing research on the topic, showing your work’s relevance to a broader problem or debate  Clearly state your research questions and objectives  Give an overview of your dissertation’s structure Everything in the introduction should be clear, engaging, and relevant to your research. By the end, the reader should understand the what, why and how of your research. If you need more help, read our guide on how to write a dissertation introduction. Literature review / Theoretical framework Before you start on your research, you should have conducted a literature review to gain a thorough understanding of the academic work that already exists on your topic. This means:  Collecting sources (e.g. books and journal articles) and selecting the most relevant ones  Critically evaluating and analyzing each source  Drawing connections between them (e.g. themes, patterns, conflicts, gaps) to make an overall point In the dissertation literature review chapter or section, you shouldn’t just summarize existing studies, but develop a coherent structure and argument that leads to a clear basis or justification for your own research. For example, it might aim to show how your research:  Addresses a gap in the literature  Takes a new theoretical or methodological approach to the topic  Proposes a solution to an unresolved problem  Advances a theoretical debate  Builds on and strengthens existing knowledge with new data The literature review often becomes the basis for a theoretical framework, in which you define and analyze the key theories, concepts and models that frame your research. In this section you can answer descriptive research questions about the relationship between concepts or variables. Methodology The methodology chapter or section describes how you conducted your research, allowing your reader to assess its validity. You should generally include:  The overall approach and type of research (e.g. qualitative, quantitative, experimental, ethnographic)  Your methods of collecting data (e.g. interviews, surveys, archives)  Details of where, when, and with whom the research took place  Your methods of analyzing data (e.g. statistical analysis, discourse analysis)  Tools and materials you used (e.g. computer programs, lab equipment)  A discussion of any obstacles you faced in conducting the research and how you overcame them  An evaluation or justification of your methods Your aim in the methodology is to accurately report what you did, as well as convincing the reader that this was the best approach to answering your research questions or objectives. nursing school , you report the results of your research. You can structure this section around sub-questions, hypotheses, or themes. In some disciplines, the results section is strictly separated from the discussion, while in others the two are combined. For example, in qualitative methods like ethnography, the presentation of the data will often be woven together with discussion and analysis. However, in quantitative and experimental research, the results should be presented separately before you discuss their meaning:  Concisely state each relevant result, including relevant descriptive statistics (e.g. means, standard deviations) and inferential statistics (e.g. test statistics, p-values).  Briefly state how the result relates to the question or whether the hypothesis was supported.  Include tables and figures if they help the reader understand your results.  Report all results that are relevant to your research questions, including any that did not meet your expectations.  Don’t include subjective interpretations or speculation. Additional data (including raw numbers, full questionnaires, or interview transcripts) can be included as an appendix. Discussion The discussion is where you explore the meaning and implications of your results in relation to your research questions. Here you should interpret the results in detail, discussing whether they met your expectations and how well they fit with the framework that you built in earlier chapters.  Give your interpretations: what do the results mean?  Explore the implications: why do the results matter?  Acknowledge the limitations: what can’t the results tell us? If any of the results were unexpected, offer explanations for why this might be. It’s a good idea to consider alternative interpretations of your data. The discussion should refer back to relevant sources to show how your results fit with existing knowledge. Conclusion The dissertation conclusion should concisely answer the main research question, leaving the reader with a clear understanding of your central argument and emphasizing what your research has contributed. In some academic conventions, the conclusion refers to a short section that comes before the discussion: first you directly state your overall conclusions, then you discuss and interpret their meaning. In other contexts, however, the conclusion refers to the final chapter, where you wrap up your dissertation with a final reflection on what you found. This type of conclusion often also includes recommendations for future research or practice. In this chapter, it’s important to leave the reader with a clear impression of why your research matters. What have you added to what was already known? Reference list You must include full details of all sources that you have cited in a reference list (sometimes also called a works cited list or bibliography). It’s important to follow a consistent citation style. Each style has strict and specific requirements for how to format your sources in the reference list. Common styles include APA and MLA, but your program will often specify which citation style you should use – make sure to check the requirements, and ask your supervisor if you’re unsure. To save time creating the reference list and make sure your citations are correctly and consistently formatted, you can use the Scribbr Citation Generator. Appendices Your dissertation itself should contain only essential information that directly contributes to answering your research question. Documents you have used that do not fit into the main body of your dissertation (such as interview transcripts, survey questions or tables with full figures) can be added as appendices. Editing and proofreading Making sure all the sections are in the right place is only the first step to a well-written dissertation. Leave plenty of time for editing and proofreading. Grammar mistakes and sloppy formatting errors can drag down the quality of your hard work. You should plan to write and revise several drafts of your thesis or dissertation before focusing on language mistakes, typos and inconsistencies.

#nursing dissertation #nursing essays #nursing school

2 notes · View notes

niecesex3 · 4 years

Text

How to structure a nursing dissertation

A nursing dissertation or thesis is a long piece of academic writing based on original research, submitted as part of a doctoral, master’s, or bachelor’s degree. Your dissertation is probably the longest piece of writing you’ve ever done, and it can be intimidating to know where to start. This article helps you work out exactly what you should include and where to include it. You can also download our full dissertation template in .docx or Google Docs format. The template includes a ready-made table of contents with notes on what to include in each chapter. You can adapt it to your own requirements. Table of contents  Deciding on your nursing dissertation structure  Title page  Acknowledgements  Abstract  Table of contents  List of figures and tables  List of abbreviations  Glossary  Introduction  Literature review / Theoretical framework  Methodology  Results  Discussion  Conclusion  Reference list  Appendices  Editing and proofreading Deciding on your dissertation’s structure Not all nursing dissertations are structured exactly the same – the form your research takes will depend on your location, discipline, topic and approach. For example, dissertations in the humanities are often structured more like a long nursing essay, building an overall argument to support a central thesis, with chapters organized around different themes or case studies. But if you’re doing empirical research in the sciences or social sciences, your dissertation should generally contain all of the following elements. In many cases, each will be a separate chapter, but sometimes you might combine them. For example, in certain kinds of qualitative social science, the results and discussion will be woven together rather than separated. The order of sections can also vary between fields and countries. For example, some universities advise that the conclusion should always come before the discussion. If in doubt about how your thesis or dissertation should be structured, always check your department’s guidelines and consult with your supervisor. Title page The very first page of your document contains your dissertation’s title, your name, department, institution, nursing degree program, and submission date. Sometimes it also includes your student number, your supervisor’s name, and the university’s logo. Many programs have strict requirements for formatting the dissertation title page. Acknowledgements The acknowledgements section is usually optional, and gives space for you to thank everyone who helped you in writing your dissertation. This might include your supervisors, participants in your research, and friends or family who supported you. Abstract The abstract is a short summary of your dissertation, usually about 150–300 words nursing essays. You should write it at the very end, when you’ve completed the rest of the dissertation. In the abstract, make sure to:  State the main topic and aims of your research  Describe the methods you used  Summarize the main results  State your conclusions Although the abstract is very short, it’s the first part (and sometimes the only part) of your dissertation that people will read, so it’s important that you get it right. If you’re struggling to write a strong abstract, read our guide on how to write an abstract. Table of contents In the table of contents, list all of your chapters and subheadings and their page numbers. The dissertation contents page gives the reader an overview of your structure and helps easily navigate the document. All parts of your dissertation should be included in the table of contents, including the appendices. You can generate a table of contents automatically in Word if you used heading styles. List of figures and tables If you have used a lot of tables and figures in your dissertation, you should itemize them in a numbered list. You can automatically generate this list using the Insert Caption feature in Word. List of abbreviations If you have used a lot of abbreviations in your dissertation, you can include them in an alphabetized list of abbreviations so that the reader can easily look up their meanings. Glossary If you have used a lot of highly specialized terms that will not be familiar to your reader, it might be a good idea to include a glossary. List the terms alphabetically and explain each term with a brief description or definition. Introduction In the introduction, you set up your dissertation’s topic, purpose, and relevance, and tell the reader what to expect in the rest of the dissertation. The introduction should:  Establish your research topic, giving necessary background information to contextualize your work  Narrow down the focus and define the scope of the research  Discuss the state of existing research on the topic, showing your work’s relevance to a broader problem or debate  Clearly state your research questions and objectives  Give an overview of your dissertation’s structure Everything in the introduction should be clear, engaging, and relevant to your research. By the end, the reader should understand the what, why and how of your research. If you need more help, read our guide on how to write a dissertation introduction. Literature review / Theoretical framework Before you start on your research, you should have conducted a literature review to gain a thorough understanding of the academic work that already exists on your topic. This means:  Collecting sources (e.g. books and journal articles) and selecting the most relevant ones  Critically evaluating and analyzing each source  Drawing connections between them (e.g. themes, patterns, conflicts, gaps) to make an overall point In the dissertation literature review chapter or section, you shouldn’t just summarize existing studies, but develop a coherent structure and argument that leads to a clear basis or justification for your own research. For example, it might aim to show how your research:  Addresses a gap in the literature  Takes a new theoretical or methodological approach to the topic  Proposes a solution to an unresolved problem  Advances a theoretical debate  Builds on and strengthens existing knowledge with new data The literature review often becomes the basis for a theoretical framework, in which you define and analyze the key theories, concepts and models that frame your research. In this section you can answer descriptive research questions about the relationship between concepts or variables. Methodology The methodology chapter or section describes how you conducted your research, allowing your reader to assess its validity. You should generally include:  The overall approach and type of research (e.g. qualitative, quantitative, experimental, ethnographic)  Your methods of collecting data (e.g. interviews, surveys, archives)  Details of where, when, and with whom the research took place  Your methods of analyzing data (e.g. statistical analysis, discourse analysis)  Tools and materials you used (e.g. computer programs, lab equipment)  A discussion of any obstacles you faced in conducting the research and how you overcame them  An evaluation or justification of your methods Your aim in the methodology is to accurately report what you did, as well as convincing the reader that this was the best approach to answering your research questions or objectives. Results Next, you report the results of your research. You can structure this section around sub-questions, hypotheses, or themes. In some disciplines, the results section is strictly separated from the discussion, while in others the two are combined. For example, in qualitative methods like ethnography, the presentation of the data will often be woven together with discussion and analysis. However, in quantitative and experimental research, the results should be presented separately before you discuss their meaning:  Concisely state each relevant result, including relevant descriptive statistics (e.g. means, standard deviations) and inferential statistics (e.g. test statistics, p-values).  Briefly state how the result relates to the question or whether the hypothesis was supported.  Include tables and figures if they help the reader understand your results.  Report all results that are relevant to your research questions, including any that did not meet your expectations.  Don’t include subjective interpretations or speculation. Additional data (including raw numbers, full questionnaires, or interview transcripts) can be included as an appendix. Discussion The discussion is where you explore the meaning and implications of your results in relation to your research questions. Here you should interpret the results in detail, discussing whether they met your expectations and how well they fit with the framework that you built in earlier chapters.  Give your interpretations: what do the results mean?  Explore the implications: why do the results matter?  Acknowledge the limitations: what can’t the results tell us? If any of the results were unexpected, offer explanations for why this might be. It’s a good idea to consider alternative interpretations of your data. The discussion should refer back to relevant sources to show how your results fit with existing knowledge. Conclusion The dissertation conclusion should concisely answer the main research question, leaving the reader with a clear understanding of your central argument and emphasizing what your research has contributed. In some academic conventions, the conclusion refers to a short section that comes before the discussion: first you directly state your overall conclusions, then you discuss and interpret their meaning. In other contexts, however, the conclusion refers to the final chapter, where you wrap up your dissertation with a final reflection on what you found. This type of conclusion often also includes recommendations for future research or practice. In this chapter, it’s important to leave the reader with a clear impression of why your research matters. What have you added to what was already known? Reference list You must include full details of all sources that you have cited in a reference list (sometimes also called a works cited list or bibliography). It’s important to follow a consistent citation style. Each style has strict and specific requirements for how to format your sources in the reference list. Common styles include APA and MLA, but your program will often specify which citation style you should use – make sure to check the requirements, and ask your supervisor if you’re unsure. To save time creating the reference list and make sure your citations are correctly and consistently formatted, you can use the Scribbr Citation Generator. Appendices Your dissertation itself should contain only essential information that directly contributes to answering your research question. Documents you have used that do not fit into the main body of your dissertation (such as interview transcripts, survey questions or tables with full figures) can be added as appendices. Editing and proofreading Making sure all the sections are in the right place is only the first step to a well-written dissertation. Leave plenty of time for editing and proofreading. Grammar mistakes and sloppy formatting errors can drag down the quality of your hard work. You should plan to write and revise several drafts of your thesis or dissertation before focusing on language mistakes, typos and inconsistencies.

#nursing dissertation #nursing essays #nursing school

1 note · View note

frogseason8 · 4 years

Text

How to structure a nursing dissertation

A nursing dissertation or thesis is a long piece of academic writing based on original research, submitted as part of a doctoral, master’s, or bachelor’s degree. Your dissertation is probably the longest piece of writing you’ve ever done, and it can be intimidating to know where to start. This article helps you work out exactly what you should include and where to include it. You can also download our full dissertation template in .docx or Google Docs format. The template includes a ready-made table of contents with notes on what to include in each chapter. You can adapt it to your own requirements. Table of contents  Deciding on your nursing dissertation structure  Title page  Acknowledgements  Abstract  Table of contents  List of figures and tables  List of abbreviations  Glossary  Introduction  Literature review / Theoretical framework  Methodology  Results  Discussion  Conclusion  Reference list  Appendices  Editing and proofreading Deciding on your dissertation’s structure Not all nursing dissertations are structured exactly the same – the form your research takes will depend on your location, discipline, topic and approach. For example, dissertations in the humanities are often structured more like a long nursing essay, building an overall argument to support a central thesis, with chapters organized around different themes or case studies. But if you’re doing empirical research in the sciences or social sciences, your dissertation should generally contain all of the following elements. In many cases, each will be a separate chapter, but sometimes you might combine them. For example, in certain kinds of qualitative social science, the results and discussion will be woven together rather than separated. The order of sections can also vary between fields and countries. For example, some universities advise that the conclusion should always come before the discussion. If in doubt about how your thesis or dissertation should be structured, always check your department’s guidelines and consult with your supervisor. Title page The very first page of your document contains your dissertation’s title, your name, department, institution, nursing degree program, and submission date. Sometimes it also includes your student number, your supervisor’s name, and the university’s logo. Many programs have strict requirements for formatting the dissertation title page. Acknowledgements The acknowledgements section is usually optional, and gives space for you to thank everyone who helped you in writing your dissertation. This might include your supervisors, participants in your research, and friends or family who supported you. Abstract The abstract is a short summary of your dissertation, usually about 150–300 words nursing essays . You should write it at the very end, when you’ve completed the rest of the dissertation. In the abstract, make sure to:  State the main topic and aims of your research  Describe the methods you used  Summarize the main results  State your conclusions Although the abstract is very short, it’s the first part (and sometimes the only part) of your dissertation that people will read, so it’s important that you get it right. If you’re struggling to write a strong abstract, read our guide on how to write an abstract. Table of contents In the table of contents, list all of your chapters and subheadings and their page numbers. The dissertation contents page gives the reader an overview of your structure and helps easily navigate the document. All parts of your dissertation should be included in the table of contents, including the appendices. You can generate a table of contents automatically in Word if you used heading styles. List of figures and tables If you have used a lot of tables and figures in your dissertation, you should itemize them in a numbered list. You can automatically generate this list using the Insert Caption feature in Word. List of abbreviations If you have used a lot of abbreviations in your dissertation, you can include them in an alphabetized list of abbreviations so that the reader can easily look up their meanings. Glossary If you have used a lot of highly specialized terms that will not be familiar to your reader, it might be a good idea to include a glossary. List the terms alphabetically and explain each term with a brief description or definition. Introduction In the introduction, you set up your dissertation’s topic, purpose, and relevance, and tell the reader what to expect in the rest of the dissertation. The introduction should:  Establish your research topic, giving necessary background information to contextualize your work  Narrow down the focus and define the scope of the research  Discuss the state of existing research on the topic, showing your work’s relevance to a broader problem or debate  Clearly state your research questions and objectives  Give an overview of your dissertation’s structure Everything in the introduction should be clear, engaging, and relevant to your research. By the end, the reader should understand the what, why and how of your research. If you need more help, read our guide on how to write a dissertation introduction. Literature review / Theoretical framework Before you start on your research, you should have conducted a literature review to gain a thorough understanding of the academic work that already exists on your topic. This means:  Collecting sources (e.g. books and journal articles) and selecting the most relevant ones  Critically evaluating and analyzing each source  Drawing connections between them (e.g. themes, patterns, conflicts, gaps) to make an overall point In the dissertation literature review chapter or section, you shouldn’t just summarize existing studies, but develop a coherent structure and argument that leads to a clear basis or justification for your own research. For example, it might aim to show how your research:  Addresses a gap in the literature  Takes a new theoretical or methodological approach to the topic  Proposes a solution to an unresolved problem  Advances a theoretical debate  Builds on and strengthens existing knowledge with new data The literature review often becomes the basis for a theoretical framework, in which you define and analyze the key theories, concepts and models that frame your research. In this section you can answer descriptive research questions about the relationship between concepts or variables. Methodology The methodology chapter or section describes how you conducted your research, allowing your reader to assess its validity. nursing school should generally include:  The overall approach and type of research (e.g. qualitative, quantitative, experimental, ethnographic)  Your methods of collecting data (e.g. interviews, surveys, archives)  Details of where, when, and with whom the research took place  Your methods of analyzing data (e.g. statistical analysis, discourse analysis)  Tools and materials you used (e.g. computer programs, lab equipment)  A discussion of any obstacles you faced in conducting the research and how you overcame them  An evaluation or justification of your methods Your aim in the methodology is to accurately report what you did, as well as convincing the reader that this was the best approach to answering your research questions or objectives. Results Next, you report the results of your research. You can structure this section around sub-questions, hypotheses, or themes. In some disciplines, the results section is strictly separated from the discussion, while in others the two are combined. For example, in qualitative methods like ethnography, the presentation of the data will often be woven together with discussion and analysis. However, in quantitative and experimental research, the results should be presented separately before you discuss their meaning:  Concisely state each relevant result, including relevant descriptive statistics (e.g. means, standard deviations) and inferential statistics (e.g. test statistics, p-values).  Briefly state how the result relates to the question or whether the hypothesis was supported.  Include tables and figures if they help the reader understand your results.  Report all results that are relevant to your research questions, including any that did not meet your expectations.  Don’t include subjective interpretations or speculation. Additional data (including raw numbers, full questionnaires, or interview transcripts) can be included as an appendix. Discussion The discussion is where you explore the meaning and implications of your results in relation to your research questions. Here you should interpret the results in detail, discussing whether they met your expectations and how well they fit with the framework that you built in earlier chapters.  Give your interpretations: what do the results mean?  Explore the implications: why do the results matter?  Acknowledge the limitations: what can’t the results tell us? If any of the results were unexpected, offer explanations for why this might be. It’s a good idea to consider alternative interpretations of your data. The discussion should refer back to relevant sources to show how your results fit with existing knowledge. Conclusion The dissertation conclusion should concisely answer the main research question, leaving the reader with a clear understanding of your central argument and emphasizing what your research has contributed. In some academic conventions, the conclusion refers to a short section that comes before the discussion: first you directly state your overall conclusions, then you discuss and interpret their meaning. In other contexts, however, the conclusion refers to the final chapter, where you wrap up your dissertation with a final reflection on what you found. This type of conclusion often also includes recommendations for future research or practice. In this chapter, it’s important to leave the reader with a clear impression of why your research matters. What have you added to what was already known? Reference list You must include full details of all sources that you have cited in a reference list (sometimes also called a works cited list or bibliography). It’s important to follow a consistent citation style. Each style has strict and specific requirements for how to format your sources in the reference list. Common styles include APA and MLA, but your program will often specify which citation style you should use – make sure to check the requirements, and ask your supervisor if you’re unsure. To save time creating the reference list and make sure your citations are correctly and consistently formatted, you can use the Scribbr Citation Generator. Appendices Your dissertation itself should contain only essential information that directly contributes to answering your research question. Documents you have used that do not fit into the main body of your dissertation (such as interview transcripts, survey questions or tables with full figures) can be added as appendices. Editing and proofreading Making sure all the sections are in the right place is only the first step to a well-written dissertation. Leave plenty of time for editing and proofreading. Grammar mistakes and sloppy formatting errors can drag down the quality of your hard work. You should plan to write and revise several drafts of your thesis or dissertation before focusing on language mistakes, typos and inconsistencies.

#nursing dissertation #nursing essays #nursing school

1 note · View note

toastsense1 · 4 years

Text

How to structure a nursing dissertation

A nursing dissertation or thesis is a long piece of academic writing based on original research, submitted as part of a doctoral, master’s, or bachelor’s degree. Your dissertation is probably the longest piece of writing you’ve ever done, and it can be intimidating to know where to start. This article helps you work out exactly what you should include and where to include it. You can also download our full dissertation template in .docx or Google Docs format. The template includes a ready-made table of contents with notes on what to include in each chapter. You can adapt it to your own requirements. Table of contents  Deciding on your nursing dissertation structure  Title page  Acknowledgements  Abstract  Table of contents  List of figures and tables  List of abbreviations  Glossary  Introduction  Literature review / Theoretical framework  Methodology  Results  Discussion  Conclusion  Reference list  Appendices  Editing and proofreading Deciding on your dissertation’s structure Not all nursing dissertations are structured exactly the same – the form your research takes will depend on your location, discipline, topic and approach. For example, dissertations in the humanities are often structured more like a long nursing essay, building an overall argument to support a central thesis, with chapters organized around different themes or case studies. But if you’re doing empirical research in the sciences or social sciences, your dissertation should generally contain all of the following elements. In many cases, each will be a separate chapter, but sometimes you might combine them. For example, in certain kinds of qualitative social science, the results and discussion will be woven together rather than separated. The order of sections can also vary between fields and countries. For example, some universities advise that the conclusion should always come before the discussion. If in doubt about how your thesis or dissertation should be structured, always check your department’s guidelines and consult with your supervisor. Title page The very first page of your document contains your dissertation’s title, your name, department, institution, nursing degree program, and submission date. Sometimes it also includes your student number, your supervisor’s name, and the university’s logo. Many programs have strict requirements for formatting the dissertation title page. Acknowledgements The acknowledgements section is usually optional, and gives space for you to thank everyone who helped you in writing your dissertation. This might include your supervisors, participants in your research, and friends or family who supported you. Abstract The abstract is a short summary of your dissertation, usually about 150–300 words nursing essays. You should write it at the very end, when you’ve completed the rest of the dissertation. In the abstract, make sure to:  State the main topic and aims of your research  Describe the methods you used  Summarize the main results  State your conclusions Although the abstract is very short, it’s the first part (and sometimes the only part) of your dissertation that people will read, so it’s important that you get it right. If you’re struggling to write a strong abstract, read our guide on how to write an abstract. Table of contents In the table of contents, list all of your chapters and subheadings and their page numbers. The dissertation contents page gives the reader an overview of your structure and helps easily navigate the document. All parts of your dissertation should be included in the table of contents, including the appendices. You can generate a table of contents automatically in Word if you used heading styles. List of figures and tables If you have used a lot of tables and figures in your dissertation, you should itemize them in a numbered list. You can automatically generate this list using the Insert Caption feature in Word. List of abbreviations If you have used a lot of abbreviations in your dissertation, you can include them in an alphabetized list of abbreviations so that the reader can easily look up their meanings. Glossary If you have used a lot of highly specialized terms that will not be familiar to your reader, it might be a good idea to include a glossary. List the terms alphabetically and explain each term with a brief description or definition. Introduction In the introduction, you set up your dissertation’s topic, purpose, and relevance, and tell the reader what to expect in the rest of the dissertation. The introduction should:  Establish your research topic, giving necessary background information to contextualize your work  Narrow down the focus and define the scope of the research  Discuss the state of existing research on the topic, showing your work’s relevance to a broader problem or debate  Clearly state your research questions and objectives  Give an overview of your dissertation’s structure Everything in the introduction should be clear, engaging, and relevant to your research. By the end, the reader should understand the what, why and how of your research. If you need more help, read our guide on how to write a dissertation introduction. Literature review / Theoretical framework Before you start on your research, you should have conducted a literature review to gain a thorough understanding of the academic work that already exists on your topic. This means:  Collecting sources (e.g. books and journal articles) and selecting the most relevant ones  Critically evaluating and analyzing each source  Drawing connections between them (e.g. themes, patterns, conflicts, gaps) to make an overall point In the dissertation literature review chapter or section, you shouldn’t just summarize existing studies, but develop a coherent structure and argument that leads to a clear basis or justification for your own research. For example, it might aim to show how your research:  Addresses a gap in the literature  Takes a new theoretical or methodological approach to the topic  Proposes a solution to an unresolved problem  Advances a theoretical debate  Builds on and strengthens existing knowledge with new data The literature review often becomes the basis for a theoretical framework, in which you define and analyze the key theories, concepts and models that frame your research. In this section you can answer descriptive research questions about the relationship between concepts or variables. Methodology The methodology chapter or section describes how you conducted your research, allowing your reader to assess its validity. nursing school should generally include:  The overall approach and type of research (e.g. qualitative, quantitative, experimental, ethnographic)  Your methods of collecting data (e.g. interviews, surveys, archives)  Details of where, when, and with whom the research took place  Your methods of analyzing data (e.g. statistical analysis, discourse analysis)  Tools and materials you used (e.g. computer programs, lab equipment)  A discussion of any obstacles you faced in conducting the research and how you overcame them  An evaluation or justification of your methods Your aim in the methodology is to accurately report what you did, as well as convincing the reader that this was the best approach to answering your research questions or objectives. Results Next, you report the results of your research. You can structure this section around sub-questions, hypotheses, or themes. In some disciplines, the results section is strictly separated from the discussion, while in others the two are combined. For example, in qualitative methods like ethnography, the presentation of the data will often be woven together with discussion and analysis. However, in quantitative and experimental research, the results should be presented separately before you discuss their meaning:  Concisely state each relevant result, including relevant descriptive statistics (e.g. means, standard deviations) and inferential statistics (e.g. test statistics, p-values).  Briefly state how the result relates to the question or whether the hypothesis was supported.  Include tables and figures if they help the reader understand your results.  Report all results that are relevant to your research questions, including any that did not meet your expectations.  Don’t include subjective interpretations or speculation. Additional data (including raw numbers, full questionnaires, or interview transcripts) can be included as an appendix. Discussion The discussion is where you explore the meaning and implications of your results in relation to your research questions. Here you should interpret the results in detail, discussing whether they met your expectations and how well they fit with the framework that you built in earlier chapters.  Give your interpretations: what do the results mean?  Explore the implications: why do the results matter?  Acknowledge the limitations: what can’t the results tell us? If any of the results were unexpected, offer explanations for why this might be. It’s a good idea to consider alternative interpretations of your data. The discussion should refer back to relevant sources to show how your results fit with existing knowledge. Conclusion The dissertation conclusion should concisely answer the main research question, leaving the reader with a clear understanding of your central argument and emphasizing what your research has contributed. In some academic conventions, the conclusion refers to a short section that comes before the discussion: first you directly state your overall conclusions, then you discuss and interpret their meaning. In other contexts, however, the conclusion refers to the final chapter, where you wrap up your dissertation with a final reflection on what you found. This type of conclusion often also includes recommendations for future research or practice. In this chapter, it’s important to leave the reader with a clear impression of why your research matters. What have you added to what was already known? Reference list You must include full details of all sources that you have cited in a reference list (sometimes also called a works cited list or bibliography). It’s important to follow a consistent citation style. Each style has strict and specific requirements for how to format your sources in the reference list. Common styles include APA and MLA, but your program will often specify which citation style you should use – make sure to check the requirements, and ask your supervisor if you’re unsure. To save time creating the reference list and make sure your citations are correctly and consistently formatted, you can use the Scribbr Citation Generator. Appendices Your dissertation itself should contain only essential information that directly contributes to answering your research question. Documents you have used that do not fit into the main body of your dissertation (such as interview transcripts, survey questions or tables with full figures) can be added as appendices. Editing and proofreading Making sure all the sections are in the right place is only the first step to a well-written dissertation. Leave plenty of time for editing and proofreading. Grammar mistakes and sloppy formatting errors can drag down the quality of your hard work. You should plan to write and revise several drafts of your thesis or dissertation before focusing on language mistakes, typos and inconsistencies.

#nursing dissertation #nursing essays #nursing school

1 note · View note

robertvoyage5 · 4 years

Text

How to structure a nursing dissertation

A nursing dissertation or thesis is a long piece of academic writing based on original research, submitted as part of a doctoral, master’s, or bachelor’s degree. Your dissertation is probably the longest piece of writing you’ve ever done, and it can be intimidating to know where to start. This article helps you work out exactly what you should include and where to include it. You can also download our full dissertation template in .docx or Google Docs format. The template includes a ready-made table of contents with notes on what to include in each chapter. You can adapt it to your own requirements. Table of contents  Deciding on your nursing dissertation structure  Title page  Acknowledgements  Abstract  Table of contents  List of figures and tables  List of abbreviations  Glossary  Introduction  Literature review / Theoretical framework  Methodology  Results  Discussion  Conclusion  Reference list  Appendices  Editing and proofreading Deciding on your dissertation’s structure Not all nursing dissertations are structured exactly the same – the form your research takes will depend on your location, discipline, topic and approach. For example, dissertations in the humanities are often structured more like a long nursing essay, building an overall argument to support a central thesis, with chapters organized around different themes or case studies. But if you’re doing empirical research in the sciences or social sciences, your dissertation should generally contain all of the following elements. In many cases, each will be a separate chapter, but sometimes you might combine them. For example, in certain kinds of qualitative social science, the results and discussion will be woven together rather than separated. The order of sections can also vary between fields and countries. For example, some universities advise that the conclusion should always come before the discussion. If in doubt about how your thesis or dissertation should be structured, always check your department’s guidelines and consult with your supervisor. Title page The very first page of your document contains your dissertation’s title, your name, department, institution, nursing degree program, and submission date. Sometimes it also includes your student number, your supervisor’s name, and the university’s logo. Many programs have strict requirements for formatting the dissertation title page. Acknowledgements The acknowledgements section is usually optional, and gives space for you to thank everyone who helped you in writing your dissertation. This might include your supervisors, participants in your research, and friends or family who supported you. Abstract The abstract is a short summary of your dissertation, usually about 150–300 words nursing essays . You should write it at the very end, when you’ve completed the rest of the dissertation. In the abstract, make sure to:  State the main topic and aims of your research  Describe the methods you used  Summarize the main results  State your conclusions Although the abstract is very short, it’s the first part (and sometimes the only part) of your dissertation that people will read, so it’s important that you get it right. If you’re struggling to write a strong abstract, read our guide on how to write an abstract. Table of contents In the table of contents, list all of your chapters and subheadings and their page numbers. The dissertation contents page gives the reader an overview of your structure and helps easily navigate the document. All parts of your dissertation should be included in the table of contents, including the appendices. You can generate a table of contents automatically in Word if you used heading styles. List of figures and tables If you have used a lot of tables and figures in your dissertation, you should itemize them in a numbered list. You can automatically generate this list using the Insert Caption feature in Word. List of abbreviations If you have used a lot of abbreviations in your dissertation, you can include them in an alphabetized list of abbreviations so that the reader can easily look up their meanings. Glossary If you have used a lot of highly specialized terms that will not be familiar to your reader, it might be a good idea to include a glossary. List the terms alphabetically and explain each term with a brief description or definition. Introduction In the introduction, you set up your dissertation’s topic, purpose, and relevance, and tell the reader what to expect in the rest of the dissertation. The introduction should:  Establish your research topic, giving necessary background information to contextualize your work  Narrow down the focus and define the scope of the research  Discuss the state of existing research on the topic, showing your work’s relevance to a broader problem or debate  Clearly state your research questions and objectives  Give an overview of your dissertation’s structure Everything in the introduction should be clear, engaging, and relevant to your research. By the end, the reader should understand the what, why and how of your research. If you need more help, read our guide on how to write a dissertation introduction. Literature review / Theoretical framework Before you start on your research, you should have conducted a literature review to gain a thorough understanding of the academic work that already exists on your topic. This means:  Collecting sources (e.g. books and journal articles) and selecting the most relevant ones  Critically evaluating and analyzing each source  Drawing connections between them (e.g. themes, patterns, conflicts, gaps) to make an overall point In the dissertation literature review chapter or section, you shouldn’t just summarize existing studies, but develop a coherent structure and argument that leads to a clear basis or justification for your own research. For example, it might aim to show how your research:  Addresses a gap in the literature  Takes a new theoretical or methodological approach to the topic  Proposes a solution to an unresolved problem  Advances a theoretical debate  Builds on and strengthens existing knowledge with new data The literature review often becomes the basis for a theoretical framework, in which you define and analyze the key theories, concepts and models that frame your research. In this section you can answer descriptive research questions about the relationship between concepts or variables. Methodology The methodology chapter or section describes how you conducted your research, allowing your reader to assess its validity. You should generally include:  The overall approach and type of research (e.g. qualitative, quantitative, experimental, ethnographic)  Your methods of collecting data (e.g. interviews, surveys, archives)  Details of where, when, and with whom the research took place  Your methods of analyzing data (e.g. statistical analysis, discourse analysis)  Tools and materials you used (e.g. computer programs, lab equipment)  A discussion of any obstacles you faced in conducting the research and how you overcame them  An evaluation or justification of your methods Your aim in the methodology is to accurately report what you did, as well as convincing the reader that this was the best approach to answering your research questions or objectives. Results Next, you report the results of your research. You can structure this section around sub-questions, hypotheses, or themes. In some disciplines, the results section is strictly separated from the discussion, while in others the two are combined. For example, in qualitative methods like ethnography, the presentation of the data will often be woven together with discussion and analysis. However, in quantitative and experimental research, the results should be presented separately before you discuss their meaning:  Concisely state each relevant result, including relevant descriptive statistics (e.g. means, standard deviations) and inferential statistics (e.g. test statistics, p-values).  Briefly state how the result relates to the question or whether the hypothesis was supported.  Include tables and figures if they help the reader understand your results.  Report all results that are relevant to your research questions, including any that did not meet your expectations.  Don’t include subjective interpretations or speculation. Additional data (including raw numbers, full questionnaires, or interview transcripts) can be included as an appendix. Discussion The discussion is where you explore the meaning and implications of your results in relation to your research questions. Here you should interpret the results in detail, discussing whether they met your expectations and how well they fit with the framework that you built in earlier chapters.  Give your interpretations: what do the results mean?  Explore the implications: why do the results matter?  Acknowledge the limitations: what can’t the results tell us? If any of the results were unexpected, offer explanations for why this might be. It’s a good idea to consider alternative interpretations of your data. The discussion should refer back to relevant sources to show how your results fit with existing knowledge. Conclusion The dissertation conclusion should concisely answer the main research question, leaving the reader with a clear understanding of your central argument and emphasizing what your research has contributed. In some academic conventions, the conclusion refers to a short section that comes before the discussion: first you directly state your overall conclusions, then you discuss and interpret their meaning. In other contexts, however, the conclusion refers to the final chapter, where you wrap up your dissertation with a final reflection on what you found. This type of conclusion often also includes recommendations for future research or practice. In this chapter, it’s important to leave the reader with a clear impression of why your research matters. What have you added to what was already known? Reference list You must include full details of all sources that you have cited in a reference list (sometimes also called a works cited list or bibliography). It’s important to follow a consistent citation style. Each style has strict and specific requirements for how to format your sources in the reference list. Common styles include APA and MLA, but your program will often specify which citation style you should use – make sure to check the requirements, and ask your supervisor if you’re unsure. To save time creating the reference list and make sure your citations are correctly and consistently formatted, you can use the Scribbr Citation Generator. Appendices Your dissertation itself should contain only essential information that directly contributes to answering your research question. Documents you have used that do not fit into the main body of your dissertation (such as interview transcripts, survey questions or tables with full figures) can be added as appendices. Editing and proofreading Making sure all the sections are in the right place is only the first step to a well-written dissertation. Leave plenty of time for editing and proofreading. Grammar mistakes and sloppy formatting errors can drag down the quality of your hard work. You should plan to write and revise several drafts of your thesis or dissertation before focusing on language mistakes, typos and inconsistencies.

#nursing dissertation #nursing essays #nursing school

1 note · View note

waybeech5 · 4 years

Text

How to structure a nursing dissertation

A nursing dissertation or thesis is a long piece of academic writing based on original research, submitted as part of a doctoral, master’s, or bachelor’s degree. Your dissertation is probably the longest piece of writing you’ve ever done, and it can be intimidating to know where to start. This article helps you work out exactly what you should include and where to include it. You can also download our full dissertation template in .docx or Google Docs format. The template includes a ready-made table of contents with notes on what to include in each chapter. You can adapt it to your own requirements. Table of contents  Deciding on your nursing dissertation structure  Title page  Acknowledgements  Abstract  Table of contents  List of figures and tables  List of abbreviations  Glossary  Introduction  Literature review / Theoretical framework  Methodology  Results  Discussion  Conclusion  Reference list  Appendices  Editing and proofreading Deciding on your dissertation’s structure Not all nursing dissertation s are structured exactly the same – the form your research takes will depend on your location, discipline, topic and approach. For example, dissertations in the humanities are often structured more like a long nursing essay, building an overall argument to support a central thesis, with chapters organized around different themes or case studies. But if you’re doing empirical research in the sciences or social sciences, your dissertation should generally contain all of the following elements. In many cases, each will be a separate chapter, but sometimes you might combine them. For example, in certain kinds of qualitative social science, the results and discussion will be woven together rather than separated. The order of sections can also vary between fields and countries. For example, some universities advise that the conclusion should always come before the discussion. If in doubt about how your thesis or dissertation should be structured, always check your department’s guidelines and consult with your supervisor. Title page The very first page of your document contains your dissertation’s title, your name, department, institution, nursing degree program, and submission date. Sometimes it also includes your student number, your supervisor’s name, and the university’s logo. Many programs have strict requirements for formatting the dissertation title page. Acknowledgements The acknowledgements section is usually optional, and gives space for you to thank everyone who helped you in writing your dissertation. This might include your supervisors, participants in your research, and friends or family who supported you. Abstract The abstract is a short summary of your dissertation, usually about 150–300 words nursing essays. You should write it at the very end, when you’ve completed the rest of the dissertation. In the abstract, make sure to:  State the main topic and aims of your research  Describe the methods you used  Summarize the main results  State your conclusions Although the abstract is very short, it’s the first part (and sometimes the only part) of your dissertation that people will read, so it’s important that you get it right. If you’re struggling to write a strong abstract, read our guide on how to write an abstract. Table of contents In the table of contents, list all of your chapters and subheadings and their page numbers. The dissertation contents page gives the reader an overview of your structure and helps easily navigate the document. All parts of your dissertation should be included in the table of contents, including the appendices. You can generate a table of contents automatically in Word if you used heading styles. List of figures and tables If you have used a lot of tables and figures in your dissertation, you should itemize them in a numbered list. You can automatically generate this list using the Insert Caption feature in Word. List of abbreviations If you have used a lot of abbreviations in your dissertation, you can include them in an alphabetized list of abbreviations so that the reader can easily look up their meanings. Glossary If you have used a lot of highly specialized terms that will not be familiar to your reader, it might be a good idea to include a glossary. List the terms alphabetically and explain each term with a brief description or definition. Introduction In the introduction, you set up your dissertation’s topic, purpose, and relevance, and tell the reader what to expect in the rest of the dissertation. The introduction should:  Establish your research topic, giving necessary background information to contextualize your work  Narrow down the focus and define the scope of the research  Discuss the state of existing research on the topic, showing your work’s relevance to a broader problem or debate  Clearly state your research questions and objectives  Give an overview of your dissertation’s structure Everything in the introduction should be clear, engaging, and relevant to your research. By the end, the reader should understand the what, why and how of your research. If you need more help, read our guide on how to write a dissertation introduction. Literature review / Theoretical framework Before you start on your research, you should have conducted a literature review to gain a thorough understanding of the academic work that already exists on your topic. This means:  Collecting sources (e.g. books and journal articles) and selecting the most relevant ones  Critically evaluating and analyzing each source  Drawing connections between them (e.g. themes, patterns, conflicts, gaps) to make an overall point In the dissertation literature review chapter or section, you shouldn’t just summarize existing studies, but develop a coherent structure and argument that leads to a clear basis or justification for your own research. For example, it might aim to show how your research:  Addresses a gap in the literature  Takes a new theoretical or methodological approach to the topic  Proposes a solution to an unresolved problem  Advances a theoretical debate  Builds on and strengthens existing knowledge with new data The literature review often becomes the basis for a theoretical framework, in which you define and analyze the key theories, concepts and models that frame your research. In this section you can answer descriptive research questions about the relationship between concepts or variables. Methodology The methodology chapter or section describes how you conducted your research, allowing your reader to assess its validity. You should generally include:  The overall approach and type of research (e.g. qualitative, quantitative, experimental, ethnographic)  Your methods of collecting data (e.g. interviews, surveys, archives)  Details of where, when, and with whom the research took place  Your methods of analyzing data (e.g. statistical analysis, discourse analysis)  Tools and materials you used (e.g. computer programs, lab equipment)  A discussion of any obstacles you faced in conducting the research and how you overcame them  An evaluation or justification of your methods Your aim in the methodology is to accurately report what you did, as well as convincing the reader that this was the best approach to answering your research questions or objectives. Results Next, you report the results of your research. You can structure this section around sub-questions, hypotheses, or themes. In some disciplines, the results section is strictly separated from the discussion, while in others the two are combined. For example, in qualitative methods like ethnography, the presentation of the data will often be woven together with discussion and analysis. However, in quantitative and experimental research, the results should be presented separately before you discuss their meaning:  Concisely state each relevant result, including relevant descriptive statistics (e.g. means, standard deviations) and inferential statistics (e.g. test statistics, p-values).  Briefly state how the result relates to the question or whether the hypothesis was supported.  Include tables and figures if they help the reader understand your results.  Report all results that are relevant to your research questions, including any that did not meet your expectations.  Don’t include subjective interpretations or speculation. Additional data (including raw numbers, full questionnaires, or interview transcripts) can be included as an appendix. Discussion The discussion is where you explore the meaning and implications of your results in relation to your research questions. Here you should interpret the results in detail, discussing whether they met your expectations and how well they fit with the framework that you built in earlier chapters.  Give your interpretations: what do the results mean?  Explore the implications: why do the results matter?  Acknowledge the limitations: what can’t the results tell us? If any of the results were unexpected, offer explanations for why this might be. It’s a good idea to consider alternative interpretations of your data. The discussion should refer back to relevant sources to show how your results fit with existing knowledge. Conclusion The dissertation conclusion should concisely answer the main research question, leaving the reader with a clear understanding of your central argument and emphasizing what your research has contributed. In some academic conventions, the conclusion refers to a short section that comes before the discussion: first you directly state your overall conclusions, then you discuss and interpret their meaning. In other contexts, however, the conclusion refers to the final chapter, where you wrap up your dissertation with a final reflection on what you found. This type of conclusion often also includes recommendations for future research or practice. In this chapter, it’s important to leave the reader with a clear impression of why your research matters. What have you added to what was already known? Reference list You must include full details of all sources that you have cited in a reference list (sometimes also called a works cited list or bibliography). It’s important to follow a consistent citation style. Each style has strict and specific requirements for how to format your sources in the reference list. Common styles include APA and MLA, but your program will often specify which citation style you should use – make sure to check the requirements, and ask your supervisor if you’re unsure. To save time creating the reference list and make sure your citations are correctly and consistently formatted, you can use the Scribbr Citation Generator. Appendices Your dissertation itself should contain only essential information that directly contributes to answering your research question. Documents you have used that do not fit into the main body of your dissertation (such as interview transcripts, survey questions or tables with full figures) can be added as appendices. Editing and proofreading Making sure all the sections are in the right place is only the first step to a well-written dissertation. Leave plenty of time for editing and proofreading. Grammar mistakes and sloppy formatting errors can drag down the quality of your hard work. You should plan to write and revise several drafts of your thesis or dissertation before focusing on language mistakes, typos and inconsistencies.

#nursing dissertation #nursing essays #nursing school

1 note · View note