#but it's more than just being occupied

[peanutblowandjobsandwich]

i feel like this is the longest ive been clean in a while which is crazy lolz

#cloud nonsense #honestly like the more occupied i an the better my mental health #n self destructive behaviours #but it's more than just being occupied #bc uni is ofc abs occupying #but i guess there's like a diff #depends on who im doing what for #like at the end of the day my degree is still like for me #the work i do is like it's all for me whatever the outcome #so yy #idk sigh #want a normal brain grrrr

[fisheito]

DID HE LICK? (🐍 edition)

STORY CHP 2: ✅ (ear/abdomen) BELOVED SR: ✅ (mouth) THE OG SSR: ✅✅ (ear; mouth) WHITE DAY: ✅❌️ (mouth) IDOLKUMO: ❌️✅ (mouth/neck/ear) VAMPIREY: ✅✅ (mouth/thighs; neck) BOOKWORM: ❌️✅ (mouth) HISSHISSSS: ✅✅ (neck; calf) IT'S RAINING: ✅✅ (DICK; neck)

H-SCENE TONGUE ACTIVATION RATE: 81%

#before i checked the scenes i aSSUMED #the only time yaku didnt get tongue action was when eiden dommed him into not being able to touch him LMAO #but nope! turns out it was more than just that time. TWO MORE TIMES in fact! #so let me correct myself: #the only time yaku didn't get tongue action was when he was #A) getting dommed by eiden #B) eiden's mouth was otherwise occupied (still sorta getting dommed by eiden) #C) drunk out of his mind #so we can infer from the facts that. should yaku not be in Following Orders mode . of sound and sober mind... #he WILL lick #and that's all i have for you today. he bleps all around. sorta curious about everyone else now #an 81% activation rate doesn't mean much if it's not compared to others hmmmm????????? #narrows eyes with a devious glint of intrigue #if yall do similar inspections of ur faves.... reblog this!! with the stats! so i can COMPARE DATA SETS #nu carnival yakumo

[yunmeng-jiang]

that man does NOT think of wei wuxian as his gege

#jiang cheng #wwx #twin prides #i have a whole post about how they both think of themselves as having an older-sibling role #but even if that wasn't true jc still always calls him by his full name and the one time wwx tried to call him shidi jc yelled at him #their relationship is not that simple! it's a huge thing that wwx occupies a weird in-between role in their family! #he's definitely not a servant but also definitely not a full member of their family and that's super important to the story! #even if jc WANTED to think of him as his older brother he would need to get past seven layers of trauma to even realize he wanted that #and then he would have to admit it to himself and then work up the courage to admit it to someone else #and even then he probably still wouldn't say it to wwx's face #sure yanli calls wwx her didi but things are much simpler from her point of view #plus she's one of those people - like lxc - that can hold an opinion deep inside herself and be at peace with it even if it conflicts + #+ with what the world says and what she's been brought up to believe #jc is not like that. he internalizes way more from the outside world and if he feels conflicted he just kind of implodes #he's spent his whole life being told that wwx is not his equal and is someone to compete against #and also secretly believing that wwx is eventually going to abandon him because he doesn't think anyone truly cares for him #plus wwx treats him like a bff who is also a liege lord rather than a beloved younger brother #he would Not form a secure attachment to wwx lmao #it also really annoys me that when people write/conceptualize him as someone who thinks of wwx as his real gege + #+ they tend to completely erase jyl and minimize her importance to jc. he HAS an older sibling who he trusts unconditionally and confides + #+ in and takes comfort from! that person already exists! and they ignore her in favor of the protagonist #it also really bugs me when they have him mourning wwx those whole 13-16 years but don't put in a single word about yanli #this kind of turned into a rant about jyl... i have a lot of feelings about her especially since i'm the oldest sibling in my family #anyway. that man does not think of wwx as his gege #haterade #(kind of)

[leroibobo]

the paradesi synagogue in kochi, kerala, india. the first synagogue on the site, built by the city's longstanding malabari jewish community, was destroyed by portugese who'd colonized the area in their persecution of locals. it was rebuilt in 1568 by spanish and portugese jews who fled persecution and later expulsion, hence the name "paradesi" ("foreign" in malayalam).

these sephardic jews and a community of jews of mixed african and european descent who were formerly enslaved ("meshuchrarim", "freedmen" in hebrew) joined the malabari jewish community of kochi and somewhat integrated. they were later joined by some iraqi, persian, yemenite, afghan, and dutch sephardic jews. the middle eastern and european jews were considered "white jews" and permitted malabari jews and meshuchrarim to worship in the synagogue. however, in what seems like a combination of local caste dynamics and racism, malabari jews were not allowed full membership. meshuchrarim weren't allowed in at all, but were instead made to sit outside during services and not allowed their own place of worship or other communal rights.

as the "white jews" tended to be rather wealthy from trade, this synagogue contains multiple antiquities. they include belgian glass chandeliers on its walls, hand-painted porcelain tiles from china on its floors, and an oriental rug that was gifted by ethiopian emperor haile selassie.

#india #architecture #interior #worship #jewish #sephardic #mizrahi #abrahamic kerala #my posts #this seems like a combo of european racism & s asian casteism but idk anything abt castes so idk how right i am #imo the attitude of the paradesi sephardim sort of echoes what went on w/ portugese & st thomas christians #though they were also influenced by ''jewish racism'' (someone not being an ''authentic'' jew or 100% jewish in lineage) #also its interesting that most paradesi jews who left india went to other commonwealth countries while most malabar jews went to occupied #palestine (for the same reason indian muslims went to pakistan more or less). something something the west's unwanted refugee dumping groun #also i'm not saying the portugese didn't persecute against locals who practiced other religions just that there was a Very Specific type of #persecution st thomas christians and malabari jews faced from them #one more thing: i think most americans dont know (and western europeans like to forget) that the transatlantic slave trade went into #western europe as well. even if most w euro countries outlawed slavery before the us did #and also that ‘white’ has never had a linear definition (yemenites are very not ‘white’-looking to the average american) #its really interesting to me how the sephardim who ended up in w europe or euro colonies ended up being richer and more exclusionary than #balkan or most mena sephardim. probably bc more money = govts get off their backs

[fluffypotatey]

Oh didn't mean wukong is abusive, should have probably used better words. I mean the insults and aggression wukong threw at macaque when he was imprisoned during their breakup fight

ohhhhhhhhh ok that makes more sense 🤔

tbh my opinion still stands 😂 if anything, Macadoo would just blow up even worse. he would be depending on that string to show that the two of them could withstand this, that it could just be the two of them like before

but swk is bitter and hurt and trapped under a mountain for (as far as he’s aware) an indiscriminate amount of time, so he does not return that hope. he lashes out and refuses to play nice as Macky was trying to do and that is the final straw

all his faith placed on that string, and he watches and hears it shatter under the mountain. his saving grace is nothing but a false hope, so he fired back the worst of his venom that he can because the string lied. it spun its little fantasy and played with his heart and he hates for falling so its lies so easily

#also #forgot to mention this in the last post but i 100% see Macky’s codependency border on very unhealthy possessive behavior #without being aware of the strings Macky’s possessiveness is more quiet and very private #like him taking those mini victories of occupying more of SWK’s time than the Brotherhood #but add being aware? it’s just worse #he acts out a bit more #he bares his teeth when you try to ‘steal’ what is said to be his #and then that reality is shattered under the mountain and Macky is lost without a tether to hold onto #and then swk is free and he’s traveling with a monk and calls the monk master and is bound to the monk like a pet (<-Macky’s pov btw) #it’s make the whole jttw outlook for Macky even worse which is more fun for me :3 #lmk #asks #shadowpeach #lmk six eared macaque

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#feeling unmoored. feels weird. directionless i guess #i just dont feel like i have a purpose rn. like whats the point of all this? i dont kno #and my head feels so empty. like im not obsessed with anything. my brain isnt overheating and forcing me to do things for better and worse #its too quiet. i have to assume that's the medication bc its literally never been like that ever. but again it makes me feel unmoored #what am i supposed to do if im not being dragged forward by the force of my own compulsions? whats the point of all this? #im sure it doesnt help that im so self isolated. i just dont kno how to have friends. or reciprocate feelings #or feel happiness in a way that makes sense. maybe aiming for happiness is too high a goal. maybe the best i can hope for is to be occupied #and not completely miserable. i dunno. i dunno. #but i have to actually start looking for a job this weekend bc grades are due Tuesday and then im adrift #even more so than now. its just so frustrating bc i dont even want to draw in a way that ive never experienced. its like i just dont care #about anything and my time feels empty. i dont kno what to do. i hate this #unrelated

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

I don't not mean this offensively at all but is blows my mind that you are a lawyer but also writing jjk fics bc I work at a law firm and cannot for the life of me imagine any of the lawyers that work there writing fanfiction LOL kudos to u seriously I know how busy schedues can get due to court dates haha

im working in like. big city criminal law stuff right now and have been told by people in my office that i come off as a very deadpan and straight-laced legal nerd so i don't think the people who know me from my attorney life are imagining me writing jjk fanfic in my free time either

#I've got a friend who's clerking for a federal judge rn who's also a big fandom person tho she doesn't write #the legal sphere in general really does try to consume your entire life and i sort of hate that part of the business #like i like being a lawyer but i don't like how aggressively it tries to occupy your whole life #it makes offices very cultish #i like having boundaries in life and i have plenty of friends in my office but like. i have a life outside of it too that i want to keep. #and lawyers are so up their own ass about professional reputation that fandom shit is almost never discussed in a legal environment #you could not waterboard it out of me that I write fanfic for fun at work oh my god #it's not that i'm ashamed of it to be clear i'm proud of my stories i just don't know any of them well enough to trust them yet #lawyers are assholes so often holy shit #like not all of us. some of the nicest people i have ever met are lawyers. but the culture breeds a lot of very big and fragile egos #probably more lawyers than you'd think are into fandom stuff but they absolutely do not bring that shit up #i'd like to think i'll be doing fanfic and fandom stuff for years. it's just a great community and i really really love doing it. #i'm also a kick ass lawyer tho so i'm probably gonna be doing some pretty serious shit at work and just also being a fanfic writer. #but yeah court is exhausting and chaotic and i've been in it every day for like two weeks now so feel free to shoot me

[in-tua-deep]

update: while i am still height blind i have discovered that i am ALSO age blind

aka my supervisor had to explain to me that, in fact, for most people my age that do not have Incredibly Ancient Fathers, he is, in fact: dad-coded

me, who has siblings older than him: bizarre

#personal #in his defense my family is just weird #my sister is thirty years older than me #basically my dad had my sister at age 20 and me at age 50 #so someone in their 40s?? sorry m8 u need more time to bake before you're dad-shaped to me i guess #this only came up because someone requested to see someone younger and my supervisor was like 'and they got me instead <3' #and i was like 'what?? you're young right?' #my supervisor out here being like: oh based on this person's age their grandfather may have lived through WW2 #my ass: oh same. my granddad was drafted into WW2 (: #i feel i just occupy a very bizarre space temporally sometimes tbh #time is an illusion and existence is a prison i guess #generations are made up

[cuntwrap--supreme]

I don't think my pothead neighbor actually knows how to smoke weed. He's out on his porch with a blunt and is straight up hacking his lungs up. He sounds like he's severely ill. But nope. This is just the morning routine. Wake up and inhale that pot smoke in, apparently, the most painful way, tears in his eyes, SoundCloud rap in his (and everyone else's because goddamn does this guy not understand he lives in an apartment) ears, hope in his heart. Or something.

#weed #marajuana #pot #blunt #my mans is so bad at smorking the bunt #he clearly does not have 3 weed smoking girlfriends #in fact. he only has one. and she yells at him fucking constantly and it's awful. #these are two white kids who obviously come from money living in income restricted housing bc they don't want to live on campus #taking up space adults who need the apartment could occupy bc they're too good for student housing #i talked to the guy's dad when i moved in and that's kinda what he said #his prescious baby boy and his girl couldn't stand how rude and loud people were in student housing #so they moved outside student housing and are now rude and loud around a bunch of people struggling to pay bills #this kid has also hit my car but refused to take accountability. despite being the only person here with a white car. #they dump trash outside all the time. just get out of their cars and yeet their trash whichever way #they're terrible #I'd love nothing more than for them to get evicted

[spacejammie-eimmajecaps]

The thing about chronic pain is that I'll be experiencing the usual horrors (pain and discomfort that isn't possible to fully ignore) but I'm not even phased, like this is just a normal Wednesday night for me.

#it hurts but i can ignore it if i keep myself occupied with other stuff #which means its not that bad #but its bad enough that trying to sleep is out of the question #and that means its another night of taking melatonin with as much advil as my kidneys can tolerate and hoping for the best #disabilty pride month except instead of pride i feel nothing but apathy and discomfort #ngl i am getting more and more discouraged as time goes on bc i am getting less and less good days #and i am losing abilities ive always taken for granted #like being able to drive for longer than 20 minutes #or doing chores #or literally just being able to stand long enough to like cook a single without it using up all my energy for the day #not even exaggerating #i can at best cook one meal a day now #on bad days i cannot cook anything that cant just be microwaved or popped in the toaster #ever since i had covid last summer it seems like my health started getting worse at a much faster rate that it was before #my neurologist said it probably triggered cfs/me and that its basically a form a long covid #which fucking sucks so bad #like exercise helps some of my other conditions but i cannot exercise at all anymore without triggering a bad crash #there is no winning #siiiiiiiiiiigh #its fine though #we carry on

[orangerosebush]

In my opinion, Artemis and Angeline have very similar experiences of paranoia as a symptom of

And thus every single family vacation will have a like, medieval war general moment where you can watch them animatedly debate the merits and/or weak points of whatever barricade they've constructed in front of the hotel room door

#I jest but I HC that Artemis' paranoia somewhat genetically comes from his mother's side whereas his issues with dissociation and #reality assessment is more genetically on his father's side of the family #The twins occupy this weird space in the family where they were born after a lot of things exacerbating mental illness in the family were #less present than when Artemis was young due to the Fowl empire #like my personal version of this is watching my aunts' kids grow up in a house where they were diagnosed with autism and adhd really really #young bc their mothers work in early ed. and are really knowledgeable about how to apply that in their home so that they have the support #they need #and let me tell you watching young autistic relatives exist and interact w kids their age who are so much better #about including 'different' peers socially then when I was a kid? that is so fucking surreal #I am very much an 'autistic Artemis truther' and I know Fox has some posts about Tim being autistic too during an era of the Fowls where it #wouldn't have even been 'masking' to borrow a contemporary term so much as just learning Not to Act Fucking Weird ever and performing this #whenever there is someone else present #but to return to the point of this post Artemis and Angeline will see a 5-star resort with insane security and go 'what I'm hearing is that #when the sun sets we will be in the Purge' #Artemis' form of paranoia is fascinating because he experiences it in the 'struggles trusting people and can spiral and believe people are #out to get him and harm him when that is not realistically assessing a situation' but also has horrible risk assessment which is so realist #realistic lmao

[kinnoth]

Ok but think about how fucking horrible Loki would have turned if Thor had managed to become king. Like, even when they were only princes together, there was basically nothing Loki couldn't get away with: bullying the patriciate, being a flagrant wizard, spending extravagant amounts of money on absolute tat. And then, he was only the third most powerful man in the empire. With Odin gone, and only Thor who could possibly curb him? Dear fucking god.

Bc when has thor ever showed an interest in curbing anything loki has ever wanted or done

#thor has to get married at some point but i really dont envy the poor woman he eventually shackles to the position of queen #like just openly blantantly he doesnt love her as much as he does loki; he doesnt listen to her as much as he does loki #the fights they would have had about thor disregarding her opinions and priorities in favour of Loki's #and loki just ......the bitterest and most resentful version of himself #hatred for the woman who is in the spot that he -- by all rights and practicality -- occupies #to be fair i think Loki would have stuck around a couple of years after Thor became king and then fuckin bailed to vanaheim #he's too proud to stick around watching himsef and Thor getting further and further from one another #it would hurt too much to watch thor getting swallowed alive by the layers & layers of responsibility til he couldn't recognise him anymore #until thor couldn't recognise himself anymore or see Loki for who he was #anyway fun thoughts #internal thor tag #the woman who agrees to marry thor? definitely not sif. #sif is way too aware of the psychosexual codependent fucking trash mess that is thor and loki's relationship #she grew up around it and was in the middle of it throughout most of her young adulthood #she has too much self respect to subject herself to a lifetime of that #she's already long gone and far away by the time the subject of thor's marriage comes up #if she's married it's been to a nice man who loves her more than she loves him #if she isn't its bc she's not sure if she really wants to be married #she's having a pretty good time being a free agent now that her brother baldr has grown up and inherited their father's house

[gojuo]

This show really needed a smallfolk POV. Alicent was supposed to be Margaery Tyrell clever in terms of winning their love. Perhaps they admired the way she cared for a sick man? And Helaena was the most loved of all. If the audience doesn’t understand that, the uprising will feel rooted in nothing because there’s no reason to believe King’s Landing would feel so deeply about them that they’re willing to kill dragons with bare hands.

sorry to make this about Succession but in Succession every action had a reaction. something a character did in season 1 had lasting effect for over 3 seasons. the writers layed down the ground work in order for future events to transpire that were logical and which made sense in the context of what had happened. HOTD lacks that, very much

#shit sucks idk if i wanna watch s02 i think i might just reread f&b instead 🤷‍♀️ #i hate watching a show & being more fucking occupied with rewriting the script because it makes no sense rather than just watching the show #its shit writing. #anti hotd #anonymous #answered

[tkc-info]

‘Don’t say colonised, we annexed their land into our state’

Dude…

#don’t mind me but this is a TikTok comment on something about al Andalus and just wtf #seriously wtf I’m not angry or anything just baffled by their logic because the Iberian peninsula was pretty much colonised lol #the arabs/amazigh came in and killed pagans and then forced christians and Jews aka the natives to pay humiliating taxes #aka the jizya simply so that they wouldn’t be killed for existing as non-Muslims as they’d done to the pagans #+ they also had to pay higher taxes on their land than Muslims and they were forbidden from occupying positions of more importance #+ they enslaved Christian women 24/7 #literally there’s a tower in the Alhambra named ‘of the captive’ because that’s where a famous Christian-slave-turned-sultan’s-wife was kept #(and btw she wasn’t happy because the moment her husband died she changed her name back to her original one and went back to being a #Christian in Castile) #also about al andalus let’s not forget that Jews were literally forbidden to wear any colour but yellow #so that they could be easily identified like a certain moustached guy once did #AND THE ALMOHADS GENOCIDED CHRISTIANS AND JEWS LOOK IT UP #anyways #the Spanish empire the Spanish Inquisition etc weren’t good #ik that #but it’s not difficult to acknowledge that atrocities can happen both ways and that a past colonial power was bad even though the new #colonial power is also bad and perhaps even worse #like if I ever go to Mexico I’m not going to go around telling people they should be happy we colonised the #because the aztecs were also a supreme piece of shit #history is complex idk why people are so patriotic over medieval empires lol #might delete later lol

[canisvesperus]

#as an disabled Indigenous person working in conservation biology and collaborative intertribal stewardship #if you’re going to bitch and moan to me about how us being vegan doesn’t fit your political narrative about eevull vegunz fuck off my blog #motherfucker I’ll eat you #gringo go home your opinions are worthless as long as ur occupying our ancestral land fucker #nobody is pissier on the behalf of us than virtue signaling Becky from Idaho who thinks she’s a Celtic pagan when her ancestors were #colonizing Protestant pig farmers #How about you give us our fucking land back and stop invalidating us and treating us as props just to feel something in your bored pathetic #privileged life and then I’ll stop being annoying and I’ll shut up and you won’t have to feel guilty about the one thing that gets under #your skin more than everything else for SOME reason #I’m literally chill every single day of my life until I open this app and see the most chronically online losers larping as social activists #why aren’t you more bothered by us calling y’all out for the 2749374 other horrible things settlers are complicit in huh no it’s only #because the risk of feeling like an animal abuser is far worse than contributing to genocide appropriating culture and looking the other way #when your institutions abuse us. think about that why don’t you #ven talks #vent #memes #just for the horse meme I like to keep track. okay bye I’m still on hiatus

[hellguarded-moved]

he!!!!!!!

#my art. #exhibits. ( “CERBERUS” ); #// idk man......... i'm not very good at drawing Creatures #// there's a lot more details that occupy my mind in terms of his hellhound form but....... #// idk beyond that i like it.... considering i've been in a rly bad slump for several years now. #// namely. a lot more fire. lmao. idk!!! #// also u know why i have actually hesitated on giving him a skull head. because that means no more dry snoot smooches!!!!!!! #// idk if i can accept it. #// but that not being the main point; while i like it i am still unsure if i want to call it definitive rather than just a concept still. #// maybe i'll find someone to commission instead. given that i cannot put my own imagination onto canvas myself. but part of me also just #// believes i need more practise. which isn't incorrect as i've mentioned earlier. but eh! i digress #// have a dog. i love him.