#but. sitting here feeling normal

[katierosefun]

and when i realize all my original stories are just about the same thing over and over and over again as though i’m sitting in front of a white board of crazy

#caroline talks #when i move into my new place #i think i’m gonna get a white board and a cork board #not for school but for writing #and then i’ll get another cork board/white board for school #but. sitting here feeling normal #when actually this is all a love story #oldest story in the universe and it’s just. #when you love someone but the timing isn’t right or when it’s been dead from the start #what do you do when you know something is dead in the water when it begins #but you decide to pursue it anyways bc isn’t love all about #giving something a chance even though you don’t know if it’ll survive #I mean. American weddings have all the oaths about until death do us part or whatever #right when you’re saying the vows you’re reminded that if anything death will eventually get in the way #and it’s like!!! ‘hello. one day you will lose each other. but do you want to proceed anyways?’ #and so many people say ‘yes’ to that and maybe i am sometimes skeptical of marriage but that part makes me scream #or like. even taking marriage out of it #you look at countless people who fell in love despite the circumstances like war or famine or just simply the pains of growing up #and it’s like!! it was inevitable!!! #and I don’t even mean romantic love necessarily either! #platonic love!!! what does it mean to create. companion even though #we will all die or maybe just separate #we have countless friend breakups #and yet we keep entering into friendships going ‘you might one day be a stranger to me. but for now i’m going to pursue this’ #AND!!! YOU KNOW!!! YOU KNOW!!! #‘this relationship already is a ghost but we will love it and nurture it anyways’ AND!!

[the---hermit]

Buying evidently queer books with my mom feeling 100% comfortable asking her to hold them for me as i do something else is something i didn't know i needed.

#since i came out to them things have not changed like idk if i expected the sky to have a different color #but this sense of relaxation of not having to hide and control things for fear of questions always gives me life #there's so much i need to discuss with them because queer talk is non existent here #i recently found out my mom didn't even know what lgbt meant #so i definitely need to sit down and have a bit of a conversation to educate them #but i am happy they know and everything is fine and normal #i am truly starting to feel queer joy lately #idk where i am going with this but small things that make me happy i guess #cris speaks #the---hermit

[salemoleander]

Joe is exiled from Hermitopia, a stranger in a strange land. And there's barely even any time to wander the lands in a bildungsroman journey of poetic self discovery, because he's being hunted. 

The Empires people keep trying to kill him for tag. Which is fine!

He's not one to interfere with whatever ritualistic murder games Grian invents. Cultural relativism is an important skill in today's day and age, and the Empires culture seems relatively violent.

However, False is also trying to kill him, and he just can't feel quite as relaxed about that. Partly because she's way more competent at murder than Oli or Fwhip, but mostly because they're friends and Joe's not sure what he's done to earn being murdered.

Sure he left Hermich-

Sure he left Hermitopia, but the exile and banning were quick and honestly- in his humble opinion- kind of uncalled for. Also also, False doesn't do anything she doesn't want to. She wouldn't ignore (exceedingly well-penned) Royal Decrees and then actually believe Xisuma's scrawled notice on a single sign had to be followed.

Joe and False banter as she hunts him, but there's a brittle quality to the humor. It feels like she's actually mad about something, but "reading private signs" posted in the middle of a public base without doors seems like a bad excuse. Admittedly sometimes things seem like bad excuses to him, while everyone else agrees they're good excuses. But this seems particularly flimsy.

So he writes and he thinks and he wanders but it's lonely. It's lonely.

Maybe this is his fault. Maybe Joe just hasn't been helpful enough- maybe he's just bad at herding cats.

And he knows that's a metaphor- an idiom? An expression! He knows it's an expression, but herding cats sounds like it could be fun! Certainly less painful than returning.

So he finds a cat, and then another. And then Joe spots a cat that looks exactly like Scar's, and his face lights up in a grin. He kneels and tries to beckon it over, and the cat darts away.

He tries not to take it personally- some cats just like to be alone, after all.

#joe hills #hc s9 #falsesymmetry #false #empires x hermitcraft #fic #salem tag #ive had this sitting in my drafts since the crossover and ive finally resolved i wont finish it/ add more #so here you go! a normal amount of feelings about joes exile arc #salem fic

[stuckinapril]

.

#I’m only very rarely inclined to get this intimate w my thoughts so I might as well say it NOW butttt I will never not see the dead children #In everything I do #Like legit #I’ve read up on Hind so extensively and seen so many photos of her #And I have a very healthy relationship w the popular Palestinian journalists so she’s not my blorbo or anything #But hearing that memo destroyed me bc bisan is only 23 and she seemed so vivacious #Idk like I do normal people things I can’t just pause on my life #But idk how it feels like to sit at a boba place and enjoy my pearl milk tea w my friends #While the horrors over there don’t just lurk the back of my mind. I do normal things and I’m guilty for having the luxury #And as an Iraqi girl I’m living in the literal ideal timeline #Where my mom decided to immigrate to the us and that’s why I’m here living a normal life like everyone else #It’s like in a different world if I were born in a different time it could’ve so easily been me. I’m one of the Lucky Ones idk #It’s not survivor’s guilt bc it’s not like I had to survive anything like I never had the chance to live in Iraq or anything #But like. If some things had fallen just a little differently #And I keep thinking about how I’d feel if it were happening to Iraq and people behaved the way they’re doing to Palestinians #I’d be so mad #And some people on here are dealing w assholes while bursting at the seams w grief #For losing their loved ones #This is why I’m so fucking angry at anyone who’s complicit #This was a major tangent but basically I feel weird about doing normal things now while simultaneously knowing I can’t just sit and wallow #And watch life pass by as if it’ll do anything #Misery is not a home but I’m struggling to be 100% normal #And I think that this tonal dissonance is reflecting on my blog too bc I can’t go back to just #Posting about all the other normal things I used to. Like I want to but sometimes I feel off. #Is this anything. I haven’t slept all night #I can’t just allow myself to lose interest in everything I used to like and be and just fade away but maybe it’s about accepting that this #Will also always be a part of me now. It’s that awareness that shadows everything I do #or maybe I need a therapist it’s a toss up #I’ll probably feel better once I get my day started but this was cathartic to voice I think #p

[imagoddamnonionmason]

Can I say one thing?

Why do people have to comment on other people’s way of conducting themselves in a fandom? If there’s an aspect of a fandom that’s you’d rather not see/interact with, then appropriately blacklist, block or do whatever so you don’t see that content.

But DO NOT go to other people’s blogs, comment on their works or their art, or do anything that might ruin their day, undermine their confidence and hard work, or overall make them feel bad.

Yes. This is about oc x canon. Fuck, it’s even about self inserts.

If that’s how someone wishes to spend their time in a fandom because it brings them joy, LET THEM DO IT.

It does not hurt you.

It does not attack you.

You can do something really responsible and NOT INTERACT.

Aka. DON’T LIKE? DON’T READ/LOOK.

It really is that simple of a concept and I have never been more baffled that this is what fandoms have become like.

#sorry I’ve been seeing a lot of shit on my dash recently #people have been sent anons regarding oc shippings with canon #etc #and I just sit here and think you’re either a plebeian or love bullying people #if you don’t like something just don’t interact #there’s a lot of things that I don’t like in certain fandoms #certain ships #certain characterisations #but I don’t go and attack those creators because god forbid they have different opinions to me #they get as much joy out of their works as I do mine and I will do whatever it takes to perpetuate a fandom #that’s all encompassing and welcoming to all kinds of people thoughts and feelings #even if I don’t subscribe to them #BECAUSE THATS WHAT A NORMAL NICE PERSON DOES #anyway #if anyone continues to get hate I will just counter with nice asks in their inboxes #or steal some kneecaps #either way hateful anons/people fuck off you’re not welcome in my fandom or near my mutuals

[ultra-raging-ghost]

Richas is trying to help bad convey his feelings and bads like post-reset social ineptness is showing because hes like "yeah i wanted to have a full day with her because she asked because she was upset" which is so fucking real. actually might need to make a whole separate post about how bad thinks because i understand it really hard

#qsmp #liveblogging #not to project onto q!bad but. that fucking guy had autism. #i understand him. I understand him. i understand his way of thinking and his feelings. i understand i wish i could just reach #through the screen and explain it in plain words to him and give him the solution #but hes trying to work through normal people feelings and emotions on his own and while its hard to see its necessary.... #just sitting here gripping my chair thinking 'you had to do this... let him do it... its a necessary part of a autistic persons development #'its done like that on purpose and its really good rep.. let him roleplay it'

[sergle]

I really really REALLY enjoy when Hugo gets to meet people/kids and gets petted. It's fun for me to just stand back and watch, especially since he'll happily let kids get all up in his face.

#he has no Boundary limit with small kids the way a reasonable dog might. #by that I mean. when dogs feel uncomfortable or threatened and maybe pop off a little growl #because you got too close to their face or maybe touched someplace they dislike (tails or paws or closed their beak) #or warning bite in worst case scenarios #where kids that are too small really shouldn't be left alone. with some dogs it's *hard* to reach that point- for hugo it is impossible. #sometimes someone will come on too strong (they normally have to be An Adult) and he'll get a little intimidated and walk back to me? #that's about as far as we get. #I've seen kids sit on him / lay on him with their full body weight - speak directly into his ear - be nose-to-nose with him #talk into his nose basically #hold his beak with both hands - pet him wrong - hug him kiss him etc #and he's like well I'm just happy to be here. #sergle.txt

[kindahoping4forever]

🚨 Luke @ The 5SOS Show Tour Milan 🚨

#I'm literally sitting here trying to link all my Madrid drafts but... like... this needed to be addressed immediately imo #5sos #5 seconds of summer #luke hemmings #luke #the 5sos show tour milan #kh4f post #like #this isn't even a normal 'for normal reasons' type post but it has the 'for normal reasons' energy yk?? #for normal reasons #right??! #we're 🤸🏻‍♀️ feeling 🤸🏻‍♀️ normal 🤸🏻‍♀️ here 🤸🏻‍♀️ #right 👹 #the 5sos show tour

[horsemeatluvr23]

hermits talking about downloading tumblr because reddit is a hellhole and the chat going NO DON'T... EVERYONE SCATTER.... so funny to me. like... do they know......

#there r likely more hermits than we know just. lurking here. #not that i'd know or anything #ominous noises #they're out there..... #now you guys know how i feel #every time i remember i have multiple mutual friends w different hermits i have to go sit in a corner for a minute #the problem with knowing many people is that you are only one degree of seperation away from far too many things #i live in constant fear #anyways who else here is normal #horsemeatposting

[barrowsteeth]

How is it possible to still find new details on every re-watch of this series? I was scrubbing through 1.06 to make a quick gif of another scene and just happened to land here.

Of course I had to stop and watch the scene because they're so damn sweet when they exchange notes. At which time I realized that Varian and Thomas are holding hands under the table, right before the Bretons’ daughter finds the listening device.

No thoughts. Only them.

#transatlantic #transatlantic netflix #varian fry #thomas lovegrove #lovefry #just sitting here speechless wondering how i've missed this #no thoughts. only them #i love them a normal amount #i feel completely normal about them holding hands at the table with their guests #completely. normal. #just a couple of husbands enjoying a game with their friends #i feel sick to my stomach (/pos) #barrowgifs

[kineticallyanywhere]

just relistened to Normal's tight 5 where he seems to straight up have a panic attack as well as admit he's miserable and sad and all I can think about is how last time Will's PC's load-carrying got ignored it pegged him as the target of a prophecy that unleashed a cataclysm on multiple worlds

#IS NORMAL OKAY #TRICK QUESTION I KNOW THE ANSWER IS NO #I'm gonna end up drawing angsty art I can feel it #sitting here rewatching starstruck odessey while drawing dndads angst #one fit in the grave one in the hello kitty roller skate #dndads #normal oak #dndads 2 #me talking #disclaimer i'm not saying they should ignore the other pcs problems #like good lord Terry/Scary #but this boy provably will not help himself

[kaeyapilled]

kid kaeya sitting quietly on a pew during mass in the favonius church feeling so distinctly alienated from everyone else in there that it borders on despairing

#yknow? #what are our thoughts on how religious the ragnvindr family was btw i need to know what you think #i cant picture them going to church super often. ljke take jeans family for comparison they were definitely in there more frequently #but yknow maybe every sunday? or every special occasion. do mondstadtian holidays include mass too #unclear tbh all of the ones we know about just include day drinking and singing #but there HAS to be more solemn/serious holidays. where youre supposed to go to church #they're catholic coded after all #barbatos died in the cross for our sins etc. ok enough. can you imagine though #Is Venti/Barbatos Jesus-Coded? #this was NOT MY ORIGINAL POINT uhhhhh #yeah kaeya and the gods man. kaeya and religion #kaeyaposting #kaeya alberich #my posts #this post is projection but only mildly because kaeya has such worse relationship to going to church #like im normal about it i just remember sitting in church camp while everyone was having a Moment With God and thinking #(not feeling god's presence at all) Man ... what the hell am i doing here..

[snekdood]

bitches be like. i hate vegans so much that i’ve decided i like killing animals and its fine and i dont feel bad and animals dont have feelings and its fine and im cool subversive and different and edgy and like to post fucked up stuff to make vegans uncomfortable bc im just so cool

#you sound like every cishet republican man to me #you're not a Cool Subversive Leftist you're literally regressing by seeing animals as just objects of your pleasure and thats it lmao #im sorry but you dont just get to throw out all of veganism. it does infact have some roots in leftism. #you can sit there and cope with the fact you agree w some vegan talking point by calling it 'animal welfare' all you want #doesnt change the fact that a lot of those ideas in those circles were formed by vegans. #damn woooah vegans arent a monolith and dont all agree on the same shit woooahhh who knew #literally i have no idea how we even got to this point or how this would be surprising. #when i was on vegan twitter bitches were arguing all the fucking time within it. ur really gonna sit ther en tell me they're all secret #eco fash that hates native ppl and people who have to eat meat? ya sure??? #you would think the individuals on tumblr- of all places- would understand how frustrating it would be to be grouped in with the worst #members of their community as if you represent them and are the sole spokesperson #you'd think they'd hate when someone jumps to conclusions about them based on their lifestyle #but naur. i think yall take it too personally. as if a vegan just being in a room is somehow trying to force you to be vegan. #literally grow tf up. #if a vegan being in the same room with you triggers feelings in you that you Have to stop eating meat- i really think thats a you problem #bud. homeboy hasnt even spoke to you leta lone look at you and apparently you feel this weird pressure now #idk man dont you think that pressure might be coming within?? maybe.... you do infact feel things and feel a lil guilty abt eating meat? #not telling you to stop... i still eat meat here n there. but at least im honest with myself about how it makes me feel to do it. #its infact normal to take a second to think about the loss someone made in exploitation to provide you with whatever. #if you can let yourself feel a lil guilt about buying a fast fashion thing you can sure as fuck finally extend your fuckin empathy to #animals and stop treating them like objects or toys.

[archduke-enver-gortash]

mmm essay about sally and kid gort in the tags (cw for child abuse, mentions of suicide, animal cruelty and a murder attempt. i always hope i don’t have to say this but just in case: i don’t excuse or condone any of her or gort’s behaviour at all.) this is literally not even touching upon everything i have to say because i hit the fucking tag limit lmao. NOBODY READ IT’S BAD BRAINSTORMING I JUST NEEDED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW

#thinkin too much about gortie side characters again. #sally this time and why she specifically talks about him the way she does #like dravo is obviously still shitty but to me he was. ‘just ‘neglectful #while sally actively hated and even felt terrorised by her own child #like. it’s not like i don’t understand her at all. #imagine you and your love don’t have much besides each other and your shop and you get pregnant and ready to raise a child #only for it to not be a child he didn’t and doesn’t cry ever and he learns everything so much sooner than most but then he never calls you #his parents and it’s not just a petty thing kids do sometimes you feel that he doesn’t see you as family and the worst part is that you #agree deep down #and as he gets older he doesn’t have any friends and actively rejects the notion of the entire concept #but then as time passes you hear about how he has entire groups of children following him and then several of them commit suicide #and that thing coming to sit with you and dravo at the dinner table says that he did what you did last week when the axe to chop wood broke #and you discarded it and got a new one #and he has these habits of ripping out flowers and making sure that they don’t regrow #and then you hear rumours about a friend’s daughter’s cat disappearing and think nothing of it #until you visit his tree house a month later and find a declawed cat and birds with clipped wings and crushed bugs that he keeps fondly #and then you see him with other children and they don’t know and his face is different and body language is entirely different #and were it not for the fact that you know better you would never see anything but a normal child #and you know that you are one who painstakingly brought this thing that should not be into the world and so you decide to end it all one da #and go to him as he’s asleep with the knife shaking in your hand #but he cries when you’re above him! screams at the top of his lungs! #so you beg for forgiveness even though you don’t deserve it through tears but as soon as the knife is put away you see the act drop and fee #his clever fingers having twisted your brain inside and out and you know that you can do nothing #and so the opportunity arises to at least remove him out of your life if not everyone’s lives and you take it immediately. #but you heard him talk. how he will close his fist around the world one day. and you know that it is not a matter of if but when. #like. imagine that. jesus dude. #like i hc her as someone that is messy and does not know a lot about life and she certainly wouldn’t have been a good mother but the love #or at least desire to love is there somewhere. and believing that having a child is really the only somewhat meaningful thing she can do #with her life. she’s not some hero or rich or anything of note. so there’s a lot obligation and not genuine desire for family here. #but she never really got the chance to be an actual mother in the first place so. who knows what that might have looked like

[pulsedemonremastered]

drawing my favs as those cheesy office type motivational posters. it helps ^_^

#my art #doodle #mspaint #yes if i had a printer i would tack him to my wall #feppi #pizza tower #i like the look ive been getting by not using reference photos #that said i think while im still in this neutral sort of state itd be a good time to study the pt sprites again #would love to get a real good handle on the style. might look at some 90s/00s 'toons styles too #been wanting to draw moe more. been wanting to draw her in a style like ren & stimpy or eene or something #i think this ''not outright depressed but still not particularly hyped about art'' block (?) im in feels like a good state of mind #to actually sit down and study with. if that makes sense. dont mind me talking to myself down here im having late nite coffees #i stole the rest of moms oatmilk and its too late to go get normal milk so i have to use this kinda yucky chocolate creamer she got me #its not my first second third fourth or even fifth choice but ill still drink it . its not disgusting its just not. good.

[charlotterenaissance]

one of the things i deeply love about gushing about people i find attractive on tumbr is that y'all are the only ones who Get It. to the untrained eye a majority of my crushes seem to be Just Some Guy, but not on here 💜

#i was thinking about that today #i was sitting there thinking about how cute mark mckinney is #and how people in the real world eg my family etc #have reacted to my crushes in the past and had that realization #it's super validating since my crushes tend to look quote normal or even odd unquote #and if i wasn't on here i might think i was weird for finding my crushes cute and feel alone #so yeah i really appreciate y'all 🤗 #should i tag my crushes? yeeeeeah #mark mckinney #brad dourif #bruce mcculloch #dave foley #scott thompson #kevin mcdonald #dennis christopher #harry anderson #john larroquette #tim robbins #there's more but that's all i can think of right now lol