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lunar-serpentinite · 3 months

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Harry Potter, son of Hecate... and James and Lily (HP x PJO AU)

so we're in an alternate universe where wixkind are basically a subspecies of human born from the spilled ichor of Hecate during the great giant war

sometimes Hecate goes around to check on her accidental creations by disguising herself as one of them and blending in

that is how she meets our power couple james and lily as one of their yearmates (Hecate was in ravenclaw btw if u even care😔)

hecate sticks around long enough to witness the fast approach of the first war against voldemort and she's like ??? well thats one of the most brutal and inefficient ways to chase for immortality but wtv

so somehow lily figures out that hecate is ,,, well ,,, hecate and asks for help on how theyre going to get out of this one alive

hecate is like mmm i dont usually help mortals but youre one of my faves so ill let you have this one

turns out hecate knew this was gonna happen the entire time bc of a prophecy apollo gave her (not the same one from trelawney, mind you) so the most she cld do to help lily without risking the ire of literally everyone else in the pantheon was ,,, help her give birth to their saviour ???

so harry james potter was born with three biological parents: hecate, james, and lily . to represent hecate's status as a triple goddess ??? and apparently harry will represent the union of three worlds : the godly, the magical, and the mundane/muggle .

hecate was under no obligation to continue keeping an eye on the wizarding world bc her role is done and they can take care of themselves now but she cant help but check in on harry from time to time ??? like thats her kid ??? and her fave mortal's ofc

so when she sees that harry was being treated as less than dirt at the dursley's she was like absolutely not and pulls some strings to get harry the fuck out of there

and thats how harry ends up in camp half-blood

mind you back then there were no cabins for non-major olympians so harry had to bunk w the hermes kids

but thats okay at least hes not being bullied anymore !!!

chiron is aware of the role harry is going to play in the wizarding world in the future but was instructed to not tell harry anything until the time was right

everyone knows harry is a hecate kid since he was claimed by her once he had his first sign of magic (made a bench in the dining pavilion explode)

harry befriends hestia in her kiddo form (yes i know nico was supposed to be the first demigod to talk to her in ages but this was in the 1990s bear with me hestia will still have a few years of lonesome before nico comes) without knowing she was hestia

harry gains the favour of hestia who gifts him a nifty little hand mirror that would take him home when he needs it the most

by the time harry is 11, he already has a decent amount of training and was even able to go to his first quest just a few days after he turned 10 yrs old after he was chosen by the words of the quest's prophecy

so harry enters the wizarding world armed with a sword disguised as a bracelet charm, a whole year's worth of ambrosia and nectar, and a bag of drachmas in case he ever gets homesick

and on his first halloween there, he slays a troll . not with a wand, but with a sword. ron is impressed, hermione is concerned, and the rest of the professors dont know what to do with a kid who was apparently trained in literal swordplay

he's in slytherin btw #slytherinsupremacy

#harry potter #harry james potter #harry potter au #harry potter pjo au #hp x pjo au #demigod harry potter

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pjoxreader · 10 months

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Hiii! Hope you’re slaying the day away. Can I request Frank with a Filipino reader? Never see any content for us anywhere 😔😔 siopao and caldereta>>>

Filipino Reader

((I'm a dumb American but I really tried my best! 😭))

-Being Filipino you were introduced to a lot of languages growing up. So much so in fact you were fluent in Cuyunon and Spanish thanks to your dad. Not that Spanish was too helpful unless you were talking to each other. But before you knew it you had to go to Camp Half-Blood. You had to move right away but that at least led you to becoming fluent in English as well!

-You rarely use Spanish, that is unless you were busy talking shit with Leo. The plus side of knowing so many languages is that you can get away with saying a lot of different things. It is rather funny watching Chiron slowly narrow his eyes at you as he debates if that really was a curse word you just said.

-You do miss home sometimes… You were born and raised in Puerto Princesa, so you wouldn’t have to go too far to see the beautiful blue glittering sea. The water in New York? Let’s just say it didn’t have that same… Charm… -You get homesick quite often, missing the simple things you used to do like doing the Sabang X Zipline. You never understood why you loved the thrill of that zipline just as much as the tourist if not more, that is until you realized you were a Demigod.

-The main thing you missed was the food from Baker’s Hill. It was a downright crime that Americans didn’t get to enjoy ube hopia or worse of all that they didn’t enjoy siopao bola bola! You did at least have the pleasure to introduce the campers to the wonderful desert of Halo-halo. With just that you quickly became very popular among the campers.

-It wasn’t easy but you began to adjust to your life as a demi-god. Though it didn’t feel like home just yet you were starting to adjust, make friends and learn how to survive against monsters. It was scary at first, being somewhere so different from home but Camp Half-Blood welcomed you with open arms. And now? Now you are looking forward to your next adventure.

Frank Zhang

-Being born and raised in Quezon City you had adjusted well to large crowds, so moving to New York wasn’t nearly as bad as you had worried it would be. Though with all the concrete buildings you were nervous for your new life.

-You have grown accustomed to the beautiful gardens with playgrounds, fountains and of course the world peace bell monument. Not to mention all the wonderful wildlife centers with all sorts of animals from crocodiles to peacocks!

-Thankfully as you get to camp you’re surrounded once again by nature, though it was different there was an air of familiarity of nature. Little did you know by pure chance the man of your dreams would be there as well.

-The two of you met with you accidentally running into the brick wall of a man. You try your best to apologize while he also scrambles out apology after apology. At least he helped you back up to your feet trying to make sure you were ok.

-Nothing but your pride was hurt thankfully, but seeing how worried he was couldn’t help but make you laugh even if you couldn’t understand half of what he was saying at the time. That does seem to help him relax a bit now that he ensured that you weren't hurt he couldn’t help but start to laugh a little too.

-When people said that you ran head first into love you didn’t think they meant it literally, but that was how you met your future boyfriend. You still love to tease him about it and watch how flustered he gets, you couldn’t imagine your future without him now.

~Masterlist & Rules~

Like my writing? Please consider sending me a Ko-fi! ☕

#pjo #hoo #pjo x reader #hoo x reader #pjo fluff #hoo fluff #leo valdez

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p2ep · 1 year

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joker from persona 5 would be so femme camp queen pussy cunt cunt slay if he had a jester hat and a gay little clown tail but instead hes incel daddy dom 2014 tumblr 😔

#krestel speaks

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augustinewrites · 5 months

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augustine i am here to represent the one and only iwaizumi hajime for this ask game 🫶🏻

sel!! u already know most of this but here is the rundown…

nation:

sumeru!! he’s definitely part of the matra

vision/weapon

pyro catalyst (melee type, like rio the slay or heizou)

how you guys meet on your adventure:

he was doing undercover work for the akademiya when he found you lost in the desert on a research trip 😔 (ik you don’t know what this means but u seem like a haravatat scholar to me) he helped you finish your research and set up camp for you both at nightfall! there was only one tent and you guys had to huddle close together for warmth 🥺 he acted all rough and gruff but was absolute awe when he heard you translate a love poem from ancient runes he’d helped you uncover.

genshin ask game

#[—ask games]#[—sel ☁️]#i will explain it to u dw GAJXBEJD

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sastrugie · 4 months

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i am convinced i had sent you an ask some days ago? if some tumblr glitch happened i am so sorry 😔 how are you doing, i hope well? this week was so silly for everyone, are you perhaps enjoying your weekend?

have you enjoyed terror camp? i am sure you have received the taped panels by now, have you watched the one with paul and nive i really enjoyed how they interact and complete each other's thoughts 😌 what have you been listening to lately? what songs simply won't leave your head? ⚘️

hello!!! yes i got that ask Im so sorry i was super busy since I went to france a few days ago hehe Im doing very very good and im happy that the holidays started (for me now at least) :) how are you??? hope you´re good too!

i have not watched the nieve and paul panel yet but i plan on watching them all soon!!! also the ones from the previous camps ahhh! <3 i love paul and nieve so much thoug they really slay! did you like the erebus day panels too?

music wise its really been crazy for me lately in kind of dived into the world of indie pop which is somehting i usually dont really listen to, but i found so many cool songs! i´m obsessed with mitskis recent album and also "slime" by marika hackmann, going back by carole king, let us create by jukebox the ghost! so basically the terror camp playlist ahahha

how are you? <3

#srs23 #r #anon #1 #sorry for the late reply ahh

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after-nine-at-the-oasis · 9 months

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I JUST FINISHED EPISODE TWO AND AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

NOT

KAY

FOR MANY REASONS XD

1) NO SEB AGAIN 😭😭😭 I FORGOT WHAT EPISODES I'D SEEN HE WAS IN, I WAS WRONG!! THE GOOD NEWS IS THIS MEANS I CAN STILL BE SURPRISED A BIT :DD

2) GINAAAAAA MY GIRLLLL!!! WHOOO HONEY GOOD FOR YOU :OO :DDD 🥳🥳🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️🥰!!! AS YOU DESERVEEE 🥰🥰🥰!!!

3) THE CASTINGGG!!! AAAHHHHH!!! ALSO WHERE'S CHAD ಠ⁠Oಠ???

4) SEBLOSSSS 😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔

I'm not okay thank you very much <3

Anyway!! Ricky and Gina's date was SO CUTE!!!!! It was literally the most adorable thing ever and I'm not okay :'DD. And I just- PUPPIES!!! Awww my babeys 🥰🥰. Also the fact that it was all because he made fun of her childhood favorite show a bit :'D stop that's so cute <33 your honor I love them so much :). Also the secret hallway meeting and the notes (written on Camp Shallow Lake stationary!!! But sir did you steal that lol-) were adorable :'DD 🥰! And AAHHHH Troy and Gabriella :DDD!!! Our babeys 🥰🥰🥰 <33. Y'all are gonna slay, congrats :D.

ASHLYNNNN honeyy 😬👀. Girl a) your thing with Maddox is sus as heck xD, b) you gotta tell Big Red!!! I mean you can come out whenever you feel comfortable but like. I think he deserves to know xd. Considering everyone else does xD. Though I do see her reasoning that it shouldn't be done over text - and while "steal his gay thunder" is funny XDD, it is a nice thing to do lol. Like, not do that I mean. Also L I V I N G for her and Carlos friendship <33. And AAHHHH congrats on Kelsi girl :DD 🥳🥳🥰!!! I know you're gonna slay it 🥰🥰.

Kourtney honeyyy :'((( you gotta go to therapy bestie <33. I mean you can't put it off :((. I get the feeling something bad is gonna happen because she keeps putting it off. Like, besides just gradually worsening from stress and whatnot, but an Event I mean. Like a breakdown or something :(. And I won't be able to take that :'). Thank you guys, I will die :'p 😭 xD. But seriously, I hope she's okay (in the end) 🥺 <33. But besides that!! AAHHHH GIRL YOU SLAYED SO HARD!! I mean, acting a biiit to Sharpay, but you're not mean to people (hopefully a yet is not needed here :') ) so I'm cool with it xD. And speaking of CONGRATS ON GETTING SHARPAY GIRLLL :DD!!! You're gonna slay 🥰🥰🥰🎉🥳!!

ALRIGHT Y'ALL, IT'S CANON THAT SEB WAS A HOMESCHOOLER!! LET IT BE KNOWN FAR A WIDE!! This is amazing news <33. Idk lol it's just fun xD. Also Big Red is the SWEETEST :'DDD!! I hope he's enjoying and slaying in Cairo 🥰🥰. Also, once again, miss you EJ and Nini <33. Oh and about Seb again - SIRRR HOW DARE YOU NOT AUDITION 😭😭💔. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME SEB!!?! I can't believe this 😭 :'). But let's be real, this is the only way he couldn't be cast as Sharpay 😤😔 /j /lh xD. Kourtney totally deserves it lol, I just miss my boy <33. In general and as Sharpay lol.

CARLOS!! Honey you are going through it 😭😭 xd. But yeah also maybe talk to Seb lol. Also I love how it's like-

Carlos in Episode 1: I'm dealing fine with everything happening with Seb :D 🙄! He'll come around

Carlos in Episode 2: :'))). this is fine. everything's fine. he hates me :'))).

Bro is going through it and I am going to love it if it gets worse XDD. Like, if he continues farther down that self destruction lol (as in he is being destroyed not he is destroying himself lol). Lovely <33. Also I'm suffering 🥰. ANYWAY! Love his and Ash's friendship 🥰🥰. AAAAHHHHHHHH CONGRATS ON BEING RYAN CARLOS!!! You're gonna slay :'DDD!! I love him so much 🥰. Also how dare he pass his assistant position on to Emmy :')). How could he do this to me <33. But also fair enough lol even if it hurts me, drop something if you need to xD. Though I love how he still read the cast list.

Speaking of Emmy, I love her xD. Girl is slaying lol. I do wish she wasn't replacing Carlos, but it is funny that she's being the errand freshman xD. Also her information gathering skills are HILARIOUS and also ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ o.o xD. OH and :(( poor girl getting kicked out of the movie, I'm sorry honey D:. Also though Carlos describing her as Broadway exile was amazing xD. And AAAHHHHHHH TAYLOR :OO :DD!! CONGRATS GIRL!!! You're gonna slay :DD. I didn't have a guess for that casting but I wasn't guessing that!! Slay for her though, good job girl :D.

Miss Jenn is going THROUGH IT lol xD. Like girl is not having a good time lol. Her dressing up to disguise herself was AMAZING though oh my gosh xD. I think she's just going to be constantly disguising and hiding and sneaking around security guards this whole season and I love that so much xD. I'm so excited for it lol. But! I'm glad her and Quinn are on a bit better terms now, with the apology and the casting of Gina and whatnot :)). Like, not great, not even good really lol, but they have to work together (a bit) :)! And I hope they will, when needed 😌. They probably won't much but eh ah you know lol. Anyway I wonder if for some reason she actually will play Ms. Darbus since we've seen her in the costume pieces xD. That would be wild lol. "I think I was playing Troy at one point" takes on a WHOLE new meaning lol. Imagine if they're constantly switching Darbus's throughout the show xD. Oh my gosh that would be hilarious lol. Either form emergencies or just because they cast so many people as Darbus (despite having so few for the rest lol). Anyway xD. If you do end up as her, congrats Miss Jenn, you're gonna slay lol XDD. I love her <3

I love how they actually read the cast list for the others too, lol xDD. We're acknowledging the side characters <33. And it's lovely xD. But also WHERE ARE STEPH AND RICO AND KADEN AND KAISON 😭😭😭💔😤!!!?! We don't deserve this </333. AND NATALIE!!!! Maybe they were all seniors lol. Still, nonetheless </3. Miss them <333. Anyway slay everyone who got cast :D.

Imagine we get Seb as Chad :')). I really doubt it lol but still xD it would be lovely <33. And I deserve it <3 XD.

ANYWAY!! The dramaaa between Mack and Dani o.o 😬. Also I was thinking maybe Gina would recast her but a second after Quinn said SHE was in trouble I was like "OHHHH yeah, Gina's getting cast" XD!! I was sure of it lol. But AAHHHHHH how excited they all were!! As they should be!!! Like that situation is like :O :D!!! But yeah, I'm so nervous and so excited :)).

NOW OR NEVER WAS SO FREAKING COOL!!!!

Listen anything added to that song is cool xD but OH MY GOSH!!! I LOVED IT SO MUCH :DDD!! HOLY COW :O :D!! Also I just loved the tension and drama, and all of them running away to audition xD 🥰🥰😍🤩❤️. It was amazing <333.

All of the music this episode was GREAT!! I loved it all so much :D. As I said, Now or Never was amazing and Ricky's serenade to Gina was so adorable :'D. I think there was more but I don't know and anyway they were all amazing 🥰🥰.

I loved this episode so much!! It was so good :D. I think things are gonna start moving super quickly from here in out (not that they've been slow or anything), just because of everything going on lol, which includes everything we've got to GET done lol. Anyway, I am so freaking excited and not at all ready 🥰🥰🥰.

NEXT UP IS EPISODE THREE!!!!

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virtualtyrant69 · 1 year

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Currently watching Superman 1978 and here are my reactions:

Wow, the Superman theme? Amazing, inspiring, sensational!

Why is Jor-El so old? This is the father of a baby???

Lmao get phantom zoned fuckers, Man of Steel could never with these graphics

Omg the reflective suits lol, it's like they're biking at night

Also love how the curl is apparently genetic and not a style choice on Kal's part

Omg his wife is so young compared to him??!?

1970s graphics are to die for/pos I love them so much

Again, man of steel could never

This is what happens when climate change goes too far smh 😔

Lmao get rekt krypton

Ooh 70s generic man scream! I love that one!

Wait, kryptonians know about Einstein?!

And the Chinese?

I love that that baby is just spinning

Omg Ma and Pa!!! ❤️❤️❤️

Martha's middle name is Clark??

Awww teen Clark ❤️

Oh he has such a silly goofy run

He had a stroke?!?! He's dead?!?!? He gave the worst pep talk ever and then died. Rip to you king

I also love the 1940s setting so far

Clark is such a plain guy he eats regular Cheerios (derogatory)

Love the iconic red flannel

Don't worry Martha, he's gonna visit as often as he can

Wait since this is the 40s, do we think my mans gets drafted?? Or like, since he technically doesn't exist in the USA he gets a pass?

If Jor-El has been dead for thousands of years how did he know about Einstein or the Chinese?

Wait, so 12 years have passed in this weird montage that isn't a montage?? He's 30 now?? He didn't visit his mom for 12 years? She could be dead!

Ok so he just skipped the war in his knowledge montage

Jimmy is so cute I just wanna squish his cheeks

Oh Clark is so Guy rn, he's so Average

Oh I love how he's pretending he can't open a bottle, this is so funny

Lmao Jimmy calling Perry "sugar"

Awww he sends checks to his mom ❤️ but does he still visit her >:|

I love his just some guy vibes

Omg I love him, Henry Cavill could never!! I mean, can you honestly imagine that man saying "swell" unironically?

He's such a big dork I love him

Oh ok he came to earth in '38, started his time skip in '56 and it's now 1968? Or is the time weird and it's in '78?

First day on the job and he gets robbed at gunpoint smh

He caught and bullet and then "fainted" and then he accidentally used his x-ray vision?? Man can't catch a break

Shout out to the seeing eye dog who barks when ppl try to steal/ripoff the blind newspaper seller

Omg lex just killed a guy by train

Wait, lex isn't bald? Also that woman he's with? Love her costume design, it's so slay

So is lex not a celebrity/business owner in this movie? Ok

And I've given it more thought, if Clark landed in 1940 then this movie would take place in 1970 which somewhat matches the costuming choices

Oh Clark sweety I love you so much you are such an idiot/pos he almost walked into the ladies room and he got his coat stuck in the door lol

He really is just some guy!!! waiting for the elevator

Huh, I didn't know they used to have waiting rooms for flights at newspaper offices, wack

Omg he just changed into his Superman suit and a pimp said his outfit was bad, I love this this is so camp

Metropolis just got their blorbo ❤️

*saves Lois lane and then infodumps on her* what a man, love that for him

Aww the little wave as he said bye, so cute

He just left a boat in the middle of the road lmao

Aww he saved a kitty in a tree, ajdhslsj girl just got hit for telling a lie about how a man saved her cat

Superman doing what Homelander could never

Ah the 70s, when you could smoke indoors on the job

Love Lois and her nic addiction. Also girl got dressed up for a man who saved her life once and then took off. You know what? Me too girl

"how big are you? I mean, how tall are you?" Okayyyy get it I guess, Miss Lane coming out with the real questions

Girl just asked him to look at her underwear, the flirting between them is amazing

They flew from south Jersey to New York in a romantic Aladdin-esque way

Lmao he dropped her

Love the poetry Lois is dropping out of nowhere

Man just upstaged himself on a date wow love him

Oh ok so he took off in 1948, landed in 1951, went on his trip in 1966, and it is now 1978, ok that makes way more sense

Luthor's secretary is so slay

Shout out to my fellow Native who sold bad land for an amazing price to some guy he didn't even know. Get that bag however you need to get that bag. Also, "At the stupid high price he offered for this worthless piece of desert, I hope it's Custer." Iconic!!! W for the Natives

He can telepathically change his suit??

He can drill into the ground by spinning?!??

Lex's yellow flower suit is so slay

Clark is so wet and pathetic rn, love that look on him

Wow unsolicited kiss, Miss Teschmacher how could you? You were so slay! Clark looked so sad and hurt afterwards D':

Is he pushing the plates of the earth back together?!?!? What?!?!?!!!!!

My man, Clark kent, is pushing two tectonic plates back together with his bare hands from the center of the Earth, what the fuck

Oh my God he also used himself as a rail for a train

Love the obvious miniature town and flood but also, Clark honey blocking it with rocks wouldn't work, ice breath would be the best option imo

Oh this is the movie where he flys so fast he turns back time, I want someone to explain to me mathematically how this works

Lois is such a girlboss the first thing she does when she sees Superman is rant and tell him off for not helping her. Girl. You just died to him. But still, werk

Oh he is bald! He was wearing wigs? Ok slay ig

10/10 loved this movie, it was camp, it was iconic!!!

#he really is just some Average Guys huh?#superman #clark kent #dc #superman 1978

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nancyboy1997 · 1 year

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You know what it’s women time #feminism— aloysia for the character ask game?

the slay queen camp girlboss herslef!!!!!!!

in common:

fantastic eyelashes <3

sibling rivalry.

love music!!!

not in common:

i could never opera singer....

not a woman 😔

or a moon 😔

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star-trekster · 1 year

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Star Trek Characters, but as my fave Willem Dafoe pictures:

‼️Dafoe-tos foe reference👇‼️

#I LOVE STAR TREK #I LOVE GOOFIN #sisko with da orbs #star trek #ds9 #benjamin sisko #julian bashir #ds9 quark #quark star trek #elim garak #alchemy of interests #camp and slay 😔#Fanart

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red-inthe-riordanverse · 2 years

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ROMANS🤩

Okay, hear me out. I may not be 💜>🧡, but the romans were something amazing to switch it up. I loved not only the characters from Camp Jupiter, but the place itself too.

I love how CHB and CJ are different but similar at the same time. At CHB you get a necklace with a yearly bead, and at CJ you get a tattoo burned into your skin for each year you’re there😘(or something like that). At CJ, you have the war games, then at CHB you have capture the flag. Honestly, both sound so fun. Then, you have your “oracles” Octavian/Ella and Rachel/Mummy. THEY TRAIN CHILDREN. At both, there are leaders, but let’s be real: Queen Reyna beats crusty immortal Chiron any day😍(sorry not sorry Chiron) Now, let’s have a moment of silence for how like a three year old Jason, had to get a tattoo burned onto his arm😔

WHY DOESN’T ANYBODY TALK ABOUT NEW ROME. IDK Y I LOVE IT SO MUCH BUT LIKE I JUST DO. One day after school: I feel like letting of some steam by battling with my friends✌️ Or even... GUESS WHAT?? I LIVE IN A CITY RIGHT BY A TRAINING AND WAR GROUND WITH SWORDS AND STUFF🤓 Yep, demigods in CJ may be serious, but they have literal elders and youngsters to protect so...

NOW LETS GET ON TO THE AMAZING CHARACTERS. Don’t get me started on Frank and Hazel. They both have an amazing friendship and I love it with all my heart. Frank is a soft, cuddly teddy bear, but also has a fierce warrior inside of him. His life is threaded to a stick. A STICK. Now Hazel came out and slayed after dying. She tricked a SUPER OLD SORCERESS with her mist tricks, which she only worked with for like a week or so. Jason Grace is underrated. He proved himself in the Burning Maze. He is a true hero. He may be the “typical hero” but it’s nice.

NOW QUEEN REYNA DESERVES HER OWN PARAGRAPH. After a terrible background she goes to Circe’s island with magical people. She then proceeds to savage to CJ and become the leader. SLAY. She then proceeds to keep her emotions in check as a TEENAGER and not shed a tear on a dead man called Jason. She then finds her rightful place with the hunters. SHE’S THE BEST.

Thanks for listening to my ted talk:)

#camp jupiter #camp half blood #Percy Jackson and the Olympians #Heroes of Olympus #PJO/HOO #hoo fandom #roman #roman mythology #new rome #rome #jason grace #Hazel Levesque #frank zhang #reyna avila ramirez arellano

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emersonfreepress · 3 years

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ROs + MC as camp counselors during a horror movie 😀

oh my godddd 🤣 dear goodness, i skimmed over the first time and was delighted, but now that i’m sitting actually answering this ask, i don’t even know where to begin 😂 this lot as horror movie camp counselors (with a few other filler counselors ofc), ok let’s gooooo

oh but first and foremost, I must address the thing that came to my mind like twenty seconds after starting this answer:

Gabe as Bill from Sleepaway Camp kthxthatsall

Ok now that I've gotten that out of the way, I must start by answering the most important question:

Who is the first to die?

Curt. Because of course he is! Fornicators always die first. I don't make the summer camp horror film rules—the genre does. Everyone thinks he's hungover and sleeping in on the second morning when really he was our opening scene kill, caught unawares while fooling around with a fellow counselor. He could be surprisingly durable in a few horror sub-genres, but definitely not any old school slashers 😂 Whether he has a dignified death or an undignified one in a vulnerable position depends entirely on how trashy the film is.

The Kill: Likely undignified, with his pants down. smdh 😔 it's hard out here for a ho i swear

That means whoever he was caught hooking up with was second to die, BTW, so MCs have been warned! But assuming MC knows better, let's move on to...

(the time to place bets for who makes it to the end credits is now!)

Rain

A filler kill. No one even knows what they're doing here since they clearly hate kids and show no desire to work 😂 They keep to themself and just sketch the surrounding nature. They're the first victim to actually see the creature (because why shouldn't it be a monster?), caught unaware while raiding the pantry at night.

The Kill: Off-screen. They manage to get a hurtful one-liner in before their demise. Good ol' Rain.

Rupan/Rohan and Vivian/Vincent

A two-fer kill. R's spent all of camp so far paired up with Vi on activities and concentrating on bothering them the whole time, in a bid to get them to loosen up enough to actually work well with kids. Vi, on the other hand, is concentrated on getting these little shits to respect them—so it's just a cycle of Vi being humiliated by children and R saving the day (then laughing at them). The two of them are focused on, like, actually being counselors, so they're not paying much attention to the others being lazy or not showing up for shifts or whatever people are complaining about.

The Kills: They're in the woods having a slightly serious argument about R knowing when to let up on Vi's extremely fragile ego and all their noise attracts the creature. They never resolve things because R gets eviscerated in the middle of their apology. Vi runs off in terror but doesn't make it!

Gabe

Gabe is on the verge of a meltdown for all of his screen time 🤣 The cabins are a disaster, the schedule is being completely ignored, the director is acting like everything is fine, these shitty fucking kids won't stop pranking him, and Kile's straight-up fallen off the face of the earth—! Honestly, his plight would be half of the comedy relief. Gabe ends up compensating for everyone else's slacking off (brutal slayings), all the while muttering and swearing about how he wishes people would stop hooking up and gossiping and do some damn work. Frequently spotted urgently stomping across campgrounds, barking orders at a fellow counselor, or barely stopping himself from swearing at children 😂

The Kill: He's just found out someone hasn't shown up for cleaning duty, again, so he takes it upon himself. In reality, that counselor did try to complete their task—they were just interrupted by one very rude, very blood-thirsty monster. Gabe discovers the horrible aftermath but is unfortunate enough to be sharing a room with the beastie. Chomp.

The New Kid

It's hard to include the MC since their potential personalities can be very different... but I think one of the base traits of the MC is, honestly, being nosy. Nosiness is a disadvantage in a slasher flick so the New Kid doesn't last long. You're on the more admin side of counselor work, like Heidi is, so she enlists you in keeping tabs on the counselors. Everything has been chaos but you find yourself distracted by the appearance of shady dealings going on. Jack and Jessie having urgent private talks, Curt still hasn't shown up to flirt with half the others yet. What could it all mean? You're trying to connect the dots to satisfy your own curiosity more than anything, though—if the director isn't concerned, you don't see why Heidi or you should be. Wait, Heidi doesn't even want intel anymore? Have you seen Curt? No—huh. Why are all the kids going home? And what are the adults freaking out about...

The Kill: Taken unawares while listening in on the director and the head chef. Something about a giant, bloody mess in the pantry? What the f—

Jack

Jack is the first to worry about people going missing and he tries to ring the alarm as early as Rain's disappearance. Everyone either wants him to take a chill pill or brushes him off by directing him to work that needs doing, admins included. R and Vi going missing isn't the biggest red flag since he's assumed their winding each other up was just build-up to a fight or a make-out—he's trying to stay out of that lol. The first person to take him seriously is Jessie, who also starts getting truly worried after Curt still hasn't turned up. He's quickly got both Jessie and Heidi on his side and trying to convince the adults to shut down but they... won't listen??

He helps Jessie execute a plan to get the campers home before nightfall and then spends the rest of the last day trying to round up the remaining counselors and inform them the show's over, time to go home—and the ones with their own cars do leave. After that, Jack does all he can to find the others before he has to accept the fact that he, Heidi, and Jess are the only survivors. They meet up, ready to get the fuck out of there—but where the hell are the keys to the van??

The Kill: The search for the car keys turns into a carnage discovery parade as Jack finds corpse after corpse of whoever didn't make it. After giving up on finding the keys in the director's building, he trips over the New Kid's remains (way to blow it, guys) and looks up to a looming shadow and a low, inhuman growl. At least his screams alert Jess and Heidi!

Heidi

Man, this girl thinks she's in a mystery novel. Wrong. Her work mainly has her working with the camp director and other administration peeps but things are way too hands-off and weird this summer. The adults are hiding things, holding hushed meetings, barely looking after the kids or counselors. She can't find her useless brother to bounce ideas off of. Recruiting the New Kid worked a little bit for collecting intel but now they've gone AWOL for some reason... As she realizes that counselors are going missing and not just sneaking around, she starts falling behind on both plots. Do the adults know something? Have people left or been taken? Why is Jessie taking Jack's babbling about a monster in the woods seriously?? The director left? Wait, they all left?? And for fuck's sake—where is her stupid brother?!

The Kill: Heidi's got to find Curt. She's got to. She has a sick feeling he never left and she just—ditches Jessie! She has the grace to apologize but she can't go home without finding her brother. Idk y'all, I think you know how this ends. Heidi speed-searches every last place she can think of in a growing panic, hyper-focused on what she can't accept is a hopeless endeavor. She's so focused she doesn't hear the thing creeping up behind her. She smells the blood first. Gobbled up!

Kile

Fled into the woods the moment Gabe's chore rampage started and spends most of the runtime there! They only came along 'cause Gabe, but he's busy being sucky so they just skip out on work entirely and take some basic camping supplies into the woods lol. They stumble across what's left of R and Vi on their way back to camp a few days later, then book it back to camp, worried. They arrive past dark, just before the climax of the film, and things have gone to complete shit: the campers are gone, the adults seem to have left in a rush—and then they start finding blood trails. Then carnage. They've equipped themself with a decently dangerous, suitably summer campy weapon which is smart! Because they end up using it pretty much immediately when this gnarly, slimy, scaly thing nearly catches them off-guard. Insert Kile fighting a monster they're totally outclassed by, the first full shots of the freaky, practical effects on the monster, etc etc. Kile manages to do actual, serious damage but loses their weapon in the process and has to book it for the van. They don't escape injury either!

Jessie

How did everything go so wrong??? This was supposed to be a good summer but now there are bodies and a monster?!? Jess makes the executive decision, once the director has gone obstructionist, to call the entire emergency contact list and get parents to come pick up their kids, but it's only made possible by coordinating a distraction with Jack. The kids get evacuated and the remaining counselors carpool their ways home, but when she's bracing to be yelled at by the adults... they all just zoom past her and get in their cars—leaving the rest of them there while the final night begins. Jack runs off to find the keys since they're stuck with the camp van as their only way out of here, ok, cool... But then Heidi, who's been getting strangely quiet as things have gone to hell, has an anxiety attack about Curt and—fucking leaves her?! In the dark?! With a monster running around??! It's only moments after Heidi's disappeared from sight that Jess hears Jack screaming, huddled to herself next to the van. Minutes pass, it's totally dark now, and she's a sitting duck...

Until Kile shows up! Nearly giving her a heart attack too since they're covered in blood and—ooze? Ichor?? There's some weird fuckin sludge on them and—oh thank God, they have the keys! ...Wait, they had the keys this whole time!?

The End

Kile's hurt so Jessie drives. Books it the fuck out of there to a fast-paced guitar track and the end credits rolling. —especially now that the priority is getting to a hospital! She handles the van like a madwoman, driving way too fast since now she's got to get to a hospital. It's just a few miles left until they're out of the woods. The credits keep rolling... but the van slows down. Gas.

They're out of gas.

Kile sighs hard. Refueling was their task.

The van slows to a crawl, then a stop. Kile swears viciously. The van is full of pool noodles and random useless shit. Moments of quiet pass until a heavy thud on the roof rocks the van back and forth. Jessie and Kile exchange a look.

Scene cuts to black and we get a mid-closing credits title card.

...

i cannot believe i wrote this much has

#just... mess #liquorcanthropy #answered #scenarios #conspiracy in emerson #eat shit and live bill #the idea of one of the kids cussing gabe out in front of the others DOES crack me up tho 😂#the first camp counselor outfit that came to mind for Gabe was actually Gene's but like...#lol that's a bit much for Gabe. Curt tho... 😂#i kinda wanna get baked and rewatch sleepaway camp now xD #why is the monster singling out teens? idk hormones taste good or smth 😂#Heidi has a rough time adapting to sudden change—Curt going missing doesn't help!#this is probably full of mistakes lol #I changed my mind and switched shit around a bunch 😂

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