#confused jake | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

There are dozens of funny blogs to kill time on Tumblr.

soriastrider · 5 months

Text

found some small beings without their glasses in my onenote files

alternatively, canon-compliant version:

#dirkjake #dirk strider #jake english #homestuck #my art #dirk looks so confused lol. poor little guy

350 notes · View notes

eyeonyou · 1 month

Text

KANAYA => SWOOP IN WITH YOUR CHARACTERISTIC AIR OF BELEAGURED YET DEBONAIR COMPETENCE AND RESCUE YOUR IDIOTIC CLOWN FRIEND FROM HIMSELF

Gamzee I Do Not Even Want To Know Why There Is A Shout Amplifier Halfway Down Your Throat

Frankly I Would Prefer To Forget Every Searing Detail Of This Grotesque Scene And In Particular The Colour Of Your Tonsils Which Is Not Information I Have Ever Once Yearned To Possess

That Being Said The Shouthusk Is Amplifying Your Gurgling Noises And None Of Us Need That So Unless You Can Choke To Death With Less Honking Clamor I Will Be Forced To Intervene

KANAYA => SIGH UPON REALISATION THAT YOU ARE THE ONLY TROLL CAPABLE OF MEDDLESOME FIRST AID PRAXIS

KANAYA => RELUCTANTLY CONSIGN YOUR POOR, BEAUTIFUL GLOVE TO EXCAVATION OF THE NON-EUCLIDEAN HORRORS OF A CLOWN'S SPASMING ESOPHAGUS AND CURSE THE GODS THAT BROUGHT YOU HERE

158 notes · View notes

shu-box-puns · 4 months

Text

I've got this image of Dad!Tsu’tey from my Father-son-shenanigans AU turning up in ATWOW during the aftermath of the SeaDragon, specifically on that one rock. And he has no idea how he ended up there, but whilst Jake and Neytiri are quaking at the sudden appearance of their dead friend (visibly aged from the joys of fatherhood), Spider pops out of the ocean.

Naturally, Tsu'tey only has eyes for his son, and immediately gets launched head first into Protective!Dad mode at the state of him. He looks like a drowned rat, has several sluggishly bleeding cuts along his body, his stripes are faded more than his Spider ever allows. Not to mention, his dreads are matted at the scalp and are in desperate need of a retwist. But most alarming of all, none of his other family members (The Sully's) seem to remember to check on him in their shock of discovering Tsu'tey's presence.

Since no one else seems to be bothering, Tsu'tey helps Spider out of the water, noting the shock on the boy's face as he hesitantly takes Tsu'tey's outstretched hand.

<"Are you okay?"> Tsu'tey asks, as he has done for countless years. And horrifyingly, instead of Spider replying with "yes Dad," or "no Dad" Tsu'tey gets a-

<"Yes sir.">

Spider has never referred to Tsu'tey as 'sir' before. It's either 'Olo'eyktan' when he's in a mood and wants to get under Tsu'tey's skin, or 'Dad'.

<"Sir?"> Tsu'tey repeats with a curl of his nose. <"Who the hell is sir? I am Dad to you. I have always been Dad to you."> And of course, Tsu'tey is dead in this universe, and Spider has no clue who this strange forest na'vi is. Not to mention he's had a very long and emotional day surrounding another father figure.

<"Dude, I have no idea who you are.">

Cue:

Tsu'tey from my Dad!Tsu'tey AU looking at Spider in our ATWOW: "Watch out kid because you're about to get the strongest and most stable support system any clan has ever seen."

BONUS:

If Spider were to admit to Tsu'tey that Quaritch is alive (he's only known the man for an hour but Eywa does he trust him to keep Neytiri from mauling him):

Side Note: Tsu'tey has it all under control, and now has recruited Neytiri to go hunt down that dead beat dad.

#I feel like he would just be really sad to see himself dead in this universe and realise that Spider had no one because of it #our Spider would be so confused #Tsu'tey is a good Dad #happy to give him his space when he needs it #content to cook for him and ask about his day #scarily protective when Spider is in even a lick of danger #it's nice to have a father figure turn up after sixteen years and it not be awkward #meanwhile Neytiri and Jake are having emotional breakdowns because thier dead friend is just THERE #Only for Tsu'tey to immediately start chewing them out for neglecting HIS son #cue confusion and chaos the entire ilu ride back to the villagr #dad tsu'tey #he'd come around of course #dad!tsu'tey #son!Spider #Spider Socorro #Father-son-duo #Father-Son-Shenanigans #jake and neytiri #atwow #fix-it #Neteyam is fine #he's just resting

217 notes · View notes

just-just-gyllenhaal · 4 months

Text

Dazed And Confused Photoshoot(2003) pics..

#Dazed And Confused Photoshoot(2003)#jacob benjamin gyllenhaal #jake gyllenhaal #jacob gyllenhaal

89 notes · View notes

devilat-thedoor · 3 months

Text

Greta Van Fleet as Dazed and Confused characters

Sammy as Kevin Pickford

Jake as Randall ‘Pink’ Floyd

Danny as David ‘Woody’ Wooderson

Josh as Ron Slater

#would also accept Josh as Mitch Kramer #i know that nobody asked for this #but it’s my favorite movie #and i think about it a lot #greta van fleet #dazed and confused #jake kiszka #sammy kiszka #josh kiszka #danny wagner #greta van fleet as #kevin pickford #randall pink floyd #woody wooderson #slater

95 notes · View notes

incorrect-hs-quotes · 6 months

Text

DAVE: i cant believe i work for amazon

JAKE: FUCKKK i need her so BADDDDD oh my GODDDDD 😭😭😭 [Image of a used automatic 2018 chevrolet colorado work truck 4x4 4dr extended cab 6 ft. lb I4 2.5L natural aspiration gasoline]

DIRK: And THAT’S my alphabetical list of comic book writers I’d assassinate by shooting squad. Now for the authors I’d send to the red room,

ROXY: if deco*27 releases another vocaloid song im killing myself

JADE: honestly its kind of gut wrenching that ill never be friends with sonic the hedgehog in real life

#submission #homestuck #incorrect homestuck quotes #dave strider #jake english #dirk strider #roxy lalonde #jade harley #mod terezi #i am so confused and i'm not even gonna bother asking what is going on here

106 notes · View notes

jakeseresinisgay · 10 months

Text

Jake knows Bradley's mood depending on which Hawaiian shirt he's wearing.

"Ah shit, it's the one with the tiny clouds. He's mad at me."

"C'mon, it's impossible to be happy this many times. Have you even washed this thing in a week???"

"The purple one with the flowers! He's hiding something, again!"

#hangster #sereshaw #hawaiian shirts #even mav is confused by the shirts #jake once got a heart attack cause bradley wore a NORMAL white shirt #like what do you want to tell me #and #who are you???

295 notes · View notes

breescorned · 1 year

Text

When you think about it bringing Neteyam back doesn’t sound crazy when you contemplate how the hell Quartich is still alive. Jake literally choked him out underwater and mind you they was down there for some time. After they finished fighting he had to have been down there for a long time without breathing. You gonna tell me his lungs didn’t collapse ???? Also, how did Spider a 14 year old boy drag a full grown Na’vi body out of the ocean in the first place. From what I remember Quartich revived like it was nothing and flew away.

551 notes · View notes

ofthecaravel · 9 months

Text

The number one thing I learned from this past week is that apparently not everybody is deeply primally afraid of meeting their celebrity crush. I would rather eat a lightbulb

#id be beyond terrified #gvf #greta van fleet #josh kiszka #danny wagner #jake kiszka #sam kiszka #its not hard to treat people like people too im just v confused by why people would be so wackadoo

128 notes · View notes

imeanwhynotbruv · 1 year

Note

Ahhh!! I’ve just been thinking about a Mowglie!Spider AU for so long now!!! I’d love to hear more about it if you have any more ideas. What was it like being raised by animals and Eywa?

I’m so glad you liked it/ asked !!!❤️❤️

Okay so, as for what it was like being raised by Eywa / animals of Pandora:

Spider is definitely big on community since was raised almost collectively if that makes sense? So like every animal would show him things that are more specific to them

EG: the Prolemuris or the Syaksyuk (the blue monkey things from the fisr movie) would have been the animals that taught Spider how to be a better climber, like how to find those invisible grips and how to swing from branches.

or like Direhorses / Pa’il would show him how to control his breathing better so that he could run more

(Granted all these lessons would need a lot of patience as they can’t used words)

But I think his primary caregiver/ closest thing to a physical parent would be the Thanator mother and her cub. (I see them as only normally having one or two cubs who they stay with untill they are in their adult hood. So they’re very protective of their territory/nests and will react violently to any perceived threat)

She’s the one who raised him while he was still a baby. She’s the one he’ll go to at night to sleep with because he feels the safest around her. He definitely takes on more of her animalistic characteristics because of that.

His upbringing was definitely difficult, more so when he was still a baby and couldn’t really communicate at all. A lot of it was trial and error.

I also think his Thanator mum barely stands it when he’s with other animals but she knows he’ll come back/ there are things she can’t teach him.

They are very protective of their young and it’s really difficult for them when they can’t see their child at all times

Spider doesn’t tend to speak much (the only language he does speak is Na’vi) bc the only time he has to do it is when he’s communing with Eywa and the ancestors so I think he’d be more inclined to using animal noises

I think he would adapt the various noises he uses depending on the animal he’s with, but it always tends to lean closer to the thanator (like a child learning their parents accent)

I also decree that Spider can replicate these noise perfectly because come on, he was raised around them & he’s Eywa’s special little guy

He’s defo a messy eater (I already said this but, he’s really really messy), he spends the first few years just eating meat raw because he wouldn’t have been introduced to fire (this doesn’t make him overly sick, it just doesn’t taste as good)

He probably only learned how to make fire because Eywa refused to let him disconnect from the spirit tree without him taking on and learning how to cook his damn food

Eywa defiantly took a far more active role in his upbringing, especially when he was a baby.

EG: she’d use the Atokirina to guide him around after he’d learned to walk, to help him find his way back if he ever got lost, lead him away from danger before he ever knew he was in it.

When he would cry uncontrollably as a baby the Atokirina would enable him to feel her presence more closely and it would be very comforting (something his Thanator mum was very thankful for) (he also learned to feel her just as closely without their help once he got older)

I don’t think he’s really aware of how significant his connection with Eywa is (despite how blatantly obvious it is to literally anyone else)

Bc the animals are obviously very closely connected with her, but they can’t tell him that what he feels isn’t the norm

His sense of fear is definitely not where it really should be because he has absolutely no problem going to places / doing things that would give others heart attacks because of how much he can feel eywa

EG: if he’s diving off large waterfalls into the water below, he’ll keep going until he climbs too high and feels this sense of danger/displeasure and he knows Eywa doesn’t want him to do that because it isn’t safe

Or if he’s not sure if something is safe to eat (probably human food) he’ll wait to see if he either gets a warm sensation in his stomach or like a quick jolt of discomfort

But this also means that when he can’t feel her (like being in the human base) sends in into panic, it’s like suddenly losing one of you important senses with no warning

I think he’d play around with other animals a lot and some of them would treat him like their own young

Eg: Ikran would nip at him like they do to their little ones to get them to try and bite back/just to play with them.

He also try’s to be independent and since he’s a kid he sometimes won’t heed Eywa’s warning

I’m sorry by having an almost teen rebellion against the literal god / planet is just the funniest thing to me 😂

Fan lizards love him but definitely hold a grudge against him 😂

You can’t tell me he wouldn’t have had fun running around annoying them as a little kid (he still does it now)

Very much into roughhousing because that’s how he played with his Thanator sibling.

He also only learned about modesty from they other Na’vi through the spirit tree / seeing some humans from a distance but not understand a thing about them

Also Eywa makes it very clear to him he needs to wear pants

Spider has never interact with a human, he actively avoided them throughout his early childhood

Like he just thinks they are the weirdest creatures ever with how out of place they look 😂

He also doesn’t like getting close to hells gate because the closer he gets to the building, the quieter Eywa gets and he absolutely hates that!

He’s never interacted with a na’vi / seen them up close but he’s more open to the idea than he is about humans

I’m not entirely sure if he can actually hear Eywa speak (if he can it’s only when he’s connected), but he can definitely feel her embrace him / feel her in the world around him. He also definitely feels her / views her as a mother in a more literal sense (something she’s happy with bc that’s her fearless and feral little boy)

Okay so for more general ideas / plot-ish ideas :

Kiri is the first Na’vi he’s seen up close and it was entirely by accident 😂

She probably tried to talk to him in English but he didn’t understand a word she said, so he tries his broken Na’vi (think small child who doesn’t talk much, not great at putting sentences together, but good enough that you get what he means)

Kiri & Spider send a few days bonding

When Kiri tells her family about the human boy none of them really believe her (they don’t call her crazy…..but they basically call her crazy👀)

They just assume she’s imagining him / it’s all a dream she keeps having

Kirk has enough of that bullshit and literally drags him kicking and screaming right into the middle of high camp just to prove her point😂 like “SEE! I’m not crazy!”

Pandemonium ensues 😂😭

Spider loses his mind

Lo’ak and Neteyam lose their minds

Tuk is just excited

Jakes brain breaks

Norm has his brain explode with science

Neytiri gets a headache

Mo’at is very intrigued

I think the scientists would be really interested in him but because of his distrust only Norm can get close when he’s in his avatar body (bc Jake & Kiri vouched for him personally, and their interactions are always outside at first after the chaos that was trying to get him inside)

I think people would be shocked at seeing Spider just doing his thing, and Norm desperately wants to know absolutely everything

I’m also going by the movies so he’s the only human (as close to human) child to have been born on Pandora because the scientists weren’t all that interested in baby making.

Spider does eventually start liking Norm because he takes way to much joy in teasing him with his animal noises/ he likes how important he feels when Norm gets all excited about the things he can do…..even if it is just him breathing

I don’t think he’d be a fan of people speaking English around him for a while because he doesn’t know how to speak it & doesn’t like that he can understand them

He’s a fast learner & Kiri is a great teacher and Tuk is her amazing helpers so he learns to speak in better sentences (even if he thinks the word use is excessive and will get sulky after a while if they keep correcting him when he doesn’t think he’s wrong) (Lo’ak finds it hilarious)

He really likes Jake because he can feels Eywa around him and makes him interested in him (different to how he feels Eywa around Kiri)

I can definitely see him and Kiri teaching each other how they experience Eywa

I absolutely see him totally unnerving jake by just quietly staring at him without blinking (everyone else finds it hilarious to see Jake get so weirded out 😂😂)

Neytiri would probably be far more accepting of him after a while & he definitely becomes some she’s begrudgingly fond of in the beginning, but eventually turns into full protective loving mama (because I’m a sucker for mama Neytiri)

Having Neytiri as his mother would definitely feel very different to Eywa/Thanator but in a very pleasant way, like she can actually hold him in her arms and speak a language he can easily understand (he still loves his other mama’s tho)

This is getting long so I’m going to leave it there 😅

I really like this au! Im interested in knowing what you guys think and I look forward to seeing how it will develop ❤️❤️

Thank you for reading & I hope you enjoyed ❤️