#conversion therapy or something

[chaoticbathwater]

stressed out of my mind because a guy i know is transphobic and very misinformed on the topic and ive been trying my very best to explain things to him but its not been very effective so far and he keeps talking to trans kids and shit and in an effort to "help" them he straight up recommends conversion therapy and other things like that, and making those people extremely uncomfortable!! and because ive talked to him multiple times i feel like its my responsibility to get him to stop doing that somehow but ive literally no idea what to do!!!!! what the hell man!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#vent #sorry i just needed to talk because what the hell #he knows im trans so we have discussions about what it means to be trans regularly #he thinks hes helping me out of my transgenderism or some shit like that and i let him talk to me because im hoping in the process i'll get #him to realize being trans is not a bad thing and hopefully make him less transphobic #but its so tiring #and recently he showed me a convo he had w a 14 year old kid whos trans and being very pushy w them trying to help with “gender dysphoria” #and that shit broke me man i cant let him do stuff like that #i dont know what to do because i feel like no matter how many sources i give him or no matter what i say he'll keep being like this and!!! #that scares me! because maybe one day some kid will actually believe that being transgender is a mental illness and that they need #conversion therapy or something #its stressing me out and i feel like the only thing left to do is cut contact w him because i dont want to accidentally encourage him or #anythign but if i leave without doing anything im basically letting him go hurt other trans people and spread misinfo everywhere and itd be #my fault for not stopping him #you get what i mean #long post wow #rambles

[decarbry]

Kurogiri and Yabureme are Shigaraki’s caretakers with their own separate purposes but at the same time they end up like siblings that Shigaraki needs to mediate. “tomura he’s TOUCHING ME” “Kurogiri, there’s literally two inches between you and his finger. stop it.” “no he was just touching me and stopped when you were looking he’s doing this on purpose”

......this was supposed to be a funny comic but instead it’s just sad

#boku no hero academia fanart #shouta aizawa #kurogiri #tomura shigaraki #there won't be much room in the actual Yabureme AU comic for laughs... like... at all #so I'll try to do little lighthearted side comics alongside it I guess LMAO #it's weird drawing fear adjacent on Aizawa's face but as a Nomu he would absolutelyreact with something like fear #if he thinks he's in trouble or has disobeyed an order #he's an intelligent Nomu of course he just defaults to non-conversational unless he's addressed #so it's easy for the LoV to just kind of brush him off rather than respect him like they do Kurogiri #if he's hovering and being creepy it's simple enough to stand him in the corner and he'll just. wait there until he's told otherwise :( #sarcastically tell him to watch paint dry and realize two days later he's still doing it #don't worry he gets a therapy arc #Yabureme Aizawa AU

[teddykaczynski]

men are so goddamn fucking infuriating!!!!!!!!!!!! we were sharing examples of gender based discrimination in our own lives in sociology class and one guys example was how he works as a caregiver for children and people think hes a pedo when he takes the kids to the park. another was a GUY who is STUDYING to become a FUCKING MIDWIFE and he was saying how so many people dont want men to be in the field of midwivery and how thats oh so hard for him :( WOMEN DONT WANT YOU. DO SOMETHING ELSE

#of like 8 or so who shared only 2 were women and they both had actual examples. some of the men had actual examples but #none of them had an example that was. misogyny like one mentioned religious trad gender roles and the other said #his parents sent him to gay conversion therapy camp #i couldnt think of a good one to share myself or else i would have. should have just made something up thats a Real thing

[notbecauseofvictories]

I never want to read about people having healthy, loving relationships in fiction. Not for any particularly noble or logical reason, I just hate it.

#I have to make friends in reality! I have to date and have emotionally honest conversations with my mother in reality! #I have to fucking self-actualize with my goddamn stupid self #IN FICTION I NEED YOU TO NEVER SPEAK OF YOUR EMOTIONS AND BLOW SOMETHING UP TO AVOID DEALING WITH THEM #have terribly ill-advised sex with someone who you feel complicated feelings for! and then #and this is key ABSOLUTELY DO NOT ADDRESS IT #no one ever gets therapy. everyone represses the hell out of everything they're feeling and then they die. #......maybe MAYBE you get a dramatic deathbed confessional but that's only if you've been viciously repressed enough to earn it. #anyway I need these characters to live the life I cannot because apparently I want to be ''fulfilled'' #and not ''viciously repressed and an unknown cipher to the people I love'' #......................................................I'm drunk and annoyed. #from the bookshelf

[miz-chase]

cw: Bones canon typical discussion of violence and abuse

if you really want a knife to the heart, please consider how early on, Brennan's default response to anything annoying or threatening is violence, including against Booth. It was a tool she didn't have as a child, so as an adult, she is quick on the offensive.

Meanwhile, the son of an abusive father, used to making excuses:

I love the way they are quiet mirrors of each other and the way they make each other better over time. Booth couldn't fix his father, but he can grow with her. I wish they addressed this a little more directly, because it's like, right there in the text, just could use some intentional highlighting &/or resolution of Brennan really recognizing the context of hitting him with his past. Dollars to donuts, The Pain in the Heart was probably not the last time she hit him in anger.

Subtext or text, the center of the show is them learning to be gentle with each other and i 🥺🥺🥺🥺

#sweets is immediately like 'bullshit' and brennan immediately shuts down the conversation #i love them in all their flaws #and this show for centering therapy #me living in my booth feelings while collecting references for something else #bones tv

[gayvampyr]

asexuals will literally get assaulted, beaten, correctively raped, forced into medical and/or psychological conversion therapy, and driven to suicide, and y’all will STILL have the audacity to say that “aphobia isn’t real”. you think the heterosexuals give us a free pass because we’re not actively having gay sex? no, because we look queer, we sound queer, we ARE queer for not being heterosexual. the lack of interest in the opposite sex is literally one of the blueprints for queerness. aces get bullied for some of the same reasons lesbians and gay men do — for not being attracted to the opposite gender. i remember being in school and especially church and being treated like an outcast, a freak, a queer and a dyke, because i didn’t like boys and i made no effort to date them. im an asexual, and im a lesbian, and both of those things made me a pariah. no non-hetero is exempt from queerphobia and suffering at the hands of straight people and im sick of the erasure

#im so sick of this shit #i hate all of you #i can’t count how many times men have tried to ‘fix’ me or doctors have told me there’s something wrong with me #that im just a flaw in human evolution and it’s in our *nature* to want sex because of procreation #that i need to be treated chemically to fix my broken brain #the same shit that gay and trans and bi people hear because we are the same #we are different but we are the same #a homophobe does not discern if you’re ace or gay or bi because no matter what you are wrong. an abomination. a sinner #and no amount of distance you put between us will change that #i’ve tried to kill myself far too many times to put up with this bullshit #acephobia #aphobia #rape tw #conversion therapy #r/pe tw

[essenceofarda]

.

#still think abt the time an (adult) male relative told me (when i was 10) that I 'needed to lose weight or no man would ever find me sexy' #which IDK feels like a shitty thing to say to anyone but especially a girl who had yet to even reach puberty lmao #and who wasn't even That overweight at the time Nor had body image issues until that moment going forward lol #ironically... I ended up having some ED issues and gained a bunch of weight from then on #mainly bc i had some CSA trauma in my early childhood way before that conversation so I internalized the idea #that if I was fat no man would give me unwanted attention #however... this thought process (on top of other things) led me to believe for almost my entire life that no man would find me attractive #or like me or love me at ALL unless I either lose a bunch of weight and maybe not even then #which is kinda why I'm overall uninterested in men even if the attraction is technically there? #I lost interest in even male Friendships tbh bc i internalized this idea that no man would be interested in me even platonically 🤔 #anyway. just something I'm working through in therapy but every once in a while I wonder why it's so hard for me to lose weight #and then I remember... ah yes.. '✨trauma✨' lol #funky's personal tag #delete later probs #anyway. I can't really talk about this stuff easily outside of therapy irl so I just be yelling into the void sorry guys :(

[mintharasthrone]

telling women of color that we belong in the same category as males and that now we have privilege over them because they fetishize us is sooo progressive. white men said: i want to rape lesbians and fetishize women so actually i am oppressed now and y’all were like “omg yes that’s so true!”

#calling *woc and lesbians fascists #and teaming up with disgusting white men who fetishize lesbians and woc who call us ugly men #is something i will never forgive osa and white women for #who bring us up as a guilt trip when we or you don't wanna fuck them #and then gaslighting us about it #you’re all evil #for supporting tra white supremacy and conversion therapy #the fascists are you

[boag]

#I remember hearing something about him being in conversion therapy a few years ago #genuinely hope he is okay holy shit

[uncanny-tranny]

I've seen some discussions pop up about gender dysphoria and how it's treated and pathologized, and in my opinion, gender dysphoria is a real feeling in that many trans people are dysphoric, but that medical professionals (notably cis ones) only hear what they want to hear. When it comes to gender dysphoria, I don't think it is inherent to being trans, but there is correlation between being trans and having gender dysphoria. I also think that dysphoria is exasperated when gender roles are so tied to sex and personhood - in my opinion, I think a lot of people's dysphoria may be eased in environments where perceived gender deviance is not seen as horrific or undesirable.

Basically:

1. Gender dysphoria is real and certain aspects of one's culture or environment can make those feelings more persistent. Gender dysphoria can look different between people, and that doesn't mean that one person's dysphoria is worse than another person's, or that one person's dysphoria is "right" while somebody else's is "wrong".

2. Gender dysphoria is tied to transness in a way that I think only pathologizes transness, and gender dysphoria shouldn't need to be proven in order to transition (socially, medically, any way)

3. Gender dysphoria can be a dynamic issue for anybody who has it, and a person's needs may change as their dysphoria changes or becomes lesser

4. Gender dysphoria is something a ton of people deal with - trans or no. Associating dysphoria with only trans people doesn't help the dysphoric people who aren't trans. Again, associating dysphoria only with trans people pathologizes transness itself because people will conflate the two.

5. For trans people with gender dysphoria, transition is a viable (and often necessary) form of treatment. It is not "enabling", it is helping trans people meet their needs. Transition is an option that is often successful, hence why forms of conversion therapy do not work. Transness is simply a natural variation of human identity.

I've been diagnosed with gender dysphoria/GID many times by many professionals, and I find that more often than not, these professionals are not equipped to deal with cases of gender dysphoria - especially when the person is also trans. This can be harmful because you essentially are meant to deal with those feelings alone.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #gender dysphoria #dysphoria tw #like gender dysphoria is a complex topic and i can see where everybody's coming from #essentially i want to get rid of the idea that transness is something which must be pathologized #because it is a part of human identity #which is *precisely* why conversion therapy doesn't work for the vast vast *vast* majority of us #and which is why those people who are put into conversion therapy for their gender are fucking miserable.. #...because they are told again and again and AGAIN that *who they are* is wrong. who /wouldn't/ be miserable in those conditions? #so many trans people do try to go through things like conversion therapy because we live in a scary world to be trans #like i did almost DIY conversion therapy because of the self-hatred i internalized because of transphobia #anyway... rant over #gender dysphoria is real and it isn't just trans people who experience it #i reject the idea that only we can experience gender dysphoria because it will lead to pathologizing us #which then leads to people trying to 'cure' us because if it can be pathologized surely it can be eradicated right? #(when people talk about 'curing' dysphoria some will not think about real solutions like transition - it will be conversion therapies)

[castdowns]

the only half way safe space to be a lesbian is online and literally y’all fucking suck too, i am so depressed

#castdowns.txt #i hate conversion therapy i don’t want to be straight i don’t want to like men i don’t like them i don’t care for them #i am so tired of feeling like the most hideous creature because everything changes when people find out that i’m gay #like i’m either a little boy or a problem and i am so fucking sad #like sorry you can’t fix me but literally i will not be able to function if i concede more ground to men and patriarchy like i am so tired #i wanna lock myself in my room a lot of the time like i don’t feel good ever #and yes my period is coming but god dammit thats not the only thing wrong #its never the only thing wrong unfortunately i just have very strong emotions that i try to suppress all of the time #yes my fawn response is bad i know this i dont know what to do about the fact that there is nothing people organically like about me #everyone has to train themselves to tolerate me and i am not above working to be loved but it doesnt feel like work towards the love i want #it feels like tying a noose tighter and tighter #it feels like smiling while my blood is pooling down the fucking drain again and again #and i love people around me i do it just always feels like i am alone #i sleep under the flag and i sleep in my bed alone every night surrounded by the stuffed animals i buy to feel something #*jo march voice* i’m just so damn lonely

[craycraybluejay]

I feel rly weird around ppl w "maps dni" bc it just rubs me the wrong way that ppl equate others w those feelings to having committed an actual crime or done something otherwise bad for existing. It's like "bpd dni" or "intrusive thought havers dni" its all just thoughts i block people who make me uncomfortable thats it.

like its not my business what ppl r thinking yk. idc. also ive seen interviews n maps genuinely dont care/want to "invade the queer community" they know its a different thing ok. the fight to treat people like people is universal but the fight to do so for people whose thoughts you detest is closer to advocacy for unpalatable mental illness and general freedom to exist with badwrong thoughts than it is advocacy to be in a relationship with someone who can actually consent to you regardless of gender. Like. they know. everyone knows and if u think that would ever be a thing,, it wouldn't. the same way that groups for abortion rights are not the same groups you go to for idk trauma support.

obv sometimes its better not to post certain things even if its harmless text ppl will dogpile u and accuse u of things bc someone got triggered. but sue me if i dont think its a crime for ppl w badwrong attractions to exist and i think its weird that others think it is.

like im a sadist i know how this shit goes intimately. "killing and torturing people is bad." "yes." "you're a bad person and deserve to be hurt for it." "but i didn't kill or torture anyone and don't really plan on it?" "you're evil for even thinking or feeling it. you still deserve to be punished." "but i didn't DO.. ANYTHING??" "weirdo murder fetishizer is triggered lol xd get hit by a truck" "..." "ur disgusting and evil and you should kys for having badwrong thoughts." "but i'm not doing anything wrong." "idc ur a gross evil monster" "i have a feeling this isnt getting anywhere. bye."

^it's like y'all reach argument bedrock the moment someone drops the idea that you CAN HAVE "badwrong" thoughts and feelings that would be unethical to act on irl without acting on them or being a bad person by the simple sin of thinking them. this is puritan nonsense. all of you have thought "sinful" thoughts. all of you have wanted to do things that would be cruel or dangerous; because if you have a brain that just Happens, whatever the nature of the thought. If you want to yell at your kid that's fine, they're annoying you and you have every right to feel that way. If you actually yell at your kid you are hurting them and that's not OK. You want to go harass someone online because they said something stupid? Fine. You actually go and do that? Bad. how hard is this to understand. am i speaking alien.

also if u punch people and go to therapy for it you are not going with the goal of stopping this desire to punch people. you are going with the goal of finding ways to vent this feeling that dont hurt anyone and figuring out the root cause of it with your therapist to better understand how you can work together to prevent this from happening.

#pro para #thought crime #badwrong thoughts #thoughts are not actions #idk if u think someone can be evil or a criminal for having thoughts n feelings #how long before u turn on me and say the same thing for different thoughts n feelings #i dont trust people like that i dont like that #have u ever wondered why verbal/physical/sexual abuse are all real terms but thought abuse isn't #its because thoughts cannot abuse you #that's because thoughts exist outside reality and thinking something does not make it happen #it would be cool if people had telekenesis but i digress people DONT #i wonder what ppl expect when they say go to therapy for ppl theyve convicted in the court of fools as thoughtcrimers #like conversion therapy or? #because a good therapist if u come to them w thoughts ur guilty ab will ask you first 'who is this hurting' #and if the answer is no one or 'just me' the solution is to work on the guilt complex and understand that ur thoughts arent actions #literally the solution is to realize this basic thing #a therapist cannot and should not try to make you 'normal' #thats not what therapy is for #therapists want to make a plan with you as to how to deal with your thoughts and feelings in ways that work best for you without hurting you #or anyone else #you dont fight depression by trying to convince someone theyre wrong and their life isnt bad enough to end it #you fight depression by giving someone the tools and a plan to protect themselves from the thoughts and feelings that distress them #and by helping them accept themselves and fix anything in life thats bothering them #but you don't deal with trauma by telling someone they shouldnt feel like that and you dont deal w anything else like that either #idk point is #u dont go to therapy to be fixed u go to therapy to find out how to live a happier and healthier life #any therapist who claims they can fix whatever you think is wrong with you you should run far far away from #the point of therapy for people w paraphilias is to figure out how to cope and minimize any risk to the person or anyone around them #if its affecting day to day life

[karinyosa]

cleaning out my following list and am being reminded of the phase i had where i was trying to make myself feel about being wlw the way i felt about being mlm (which is not what i called it at the time and also i was bisexual at this time) and i did this by. following every random carol fan blog i could find jshdsjhshjdsdcjhsdjchsbjdcgshdcjsdghcjh

#to be fair this phase introduced me to some banger media #but i literally was like so disturbed by how i felt about mlm media that i tried to compensate by placing myself in as much proximity to wl #media/aesthetics as possible shjhsjdhsjhcjshkcjhs??????? #i was trying to train myself to be sapphic/a better sapphic????? and also present as such. Online #which. like i feel like sapphic is a different thing from being wlw/gay (for women) but thats another conversation #but yeah LMAO i was like i need to be reading/watching more WOMAN media. man PURGE #bizarre form of not quite conversion therapy i dont even know what to say lmaooooooo #karinyo.txt #but yeah no like the way i dressed was to an extent how i imagined a specific type of bisexual/sapphic woman might dress #and i was trying to seek out wlw media that was like. the wlw equivalent of the mlm media i liked. like i thought the issue was the type #of media i'd seen. this is how i got into within the wires #which is a BANGER podcast to be fair wtw season 2 SLAPS. love those insane old women <3 #but no yeah i was like. it's hashtag carol christmas smiling emoji smiling emoji #literally hello fellow sapphics #this is why part of me is still like maybe the only reason i dont like girls is becuse i associate that with being a woman HJDHFJSHJ #like maybe when he gets on testosterone he'll be slightly more bisexual #may also have had something to do with the fact that most of my friends strongly preferred women and/or ided as wlw-adjacent at the time? #like i also just partially wanted to be seen by them as having good taste shdskdsjdkj #hence. man purge

[runby2]

i've grown into this weird category as a mentally ill person where i can no longer stand mentally ill social media circles with people who refuse to heal and use mental illness as an identity and social status but i also can't stand moving to twitter with the people who think they don't have mental illnesses so i'm kind of just stuck here finding the occasional cool people down the lazy river of meeting furries with critical thinking skills . in anyone's defense it was my mistake for touching grass.

#if you're stuck there too please feel free to reblog this bc i'm only following like 10 people rn #and for the life of me i just want a healthy online experience #there's like this phase that's like you're allowed to identify as your mental illness because it effects your identity' but oh my god no #no i'm not my mental illnesses #and realizing that alone and leaving communities that only reduce conversation to mental illness saved my life #mental illnesses are a label so you can learn to heal they're not a death sentence #they're so you can get medicated and get therapy and be labeled by your struggles in terms of recovery #they're not a community #they're not a discourse topic #probably everyone has one but we're all human #please #find things that make you happy and make your identity around that #stop googling mental illnesses to identify with them and then going on tumblr to find the community for it #it ruined my life and it will ruin yours too even if you feel fine with it at the moment because it's a #'community' #don't isolate with a community over something as mundane as a mental illness label that defines how your brain works #watch cooking videos and feel the sunshine and unironically as someone who's healed #touch grass with me

[every-dayiwakeup]

What the fuck lmao

I don't understand these people and... quite frankly I never want to.

#tw fandom discourse #convert? #what are you the catholic church 😭 #idk i think liking Billy isnt the worst thing ive ever done tbh lol #the only time id go to therapy for something pertaining to billy... it would be bc i relate to him you intolerant fucks 😭 #conversion camp??

[epersonae]

This was going to be an addendum to the five fic Friday I intended to post on Friday, but the end of the week was a little wild, so there was no post, so I'm doing this separately while I'm thinking about it.

first: Choose Your Own Adventure: Reunion! is pretty great, I haven't read all of it but what I have read has been good. The ramble to follow is not a statement about the work as writing or a judgement on the writers, but a weird mental journey I went on while reading.

I follow a lot (most?) of the writers, several of them I would consider to be good personal friends, and one of them is my actual best friend who I have known for about six years. And this group made the choice -- which I think is both cool and interesting! -- not to put anybody's names on individual chapters, and WOW did that end up throwing me for a loop.

Because I have not (yet?) been able to pick out any individual authors (I made one tragically incorrect guess; friendos who heard me work thru this in real time or later, don't call me out on my bad guessing!) and it kind of fucks with my head. In this way where I doubt my ability to know someone's work, and what does that say about both my "skill" (?????) as a reader and about my attentiveness as a friend?!

And THEN. I got caught in a loop of guessing and not guessing and thinking too hard about people's word choices and writing quirks and whatever, and I found that I was Having A Bad Time. As in: I was actively not enjoying the flow of the story because I was in my head doing pattern-matching. Combined with the CAN YOU EVEN CALL YOURSELF A READER/FRIEND thoughts above, I had to just put it down for a minute and work through all of those thoughts.

I've been thinking a lot about various forms of editor brain (at varying levels of granularity - my current WIP has required a lot of shifting from sentence level to page level to overall structure level) vs reader brain, and then I guess now I've added puzzle brain as a very different thinking process. And that it's very hard, for me anyway, to get the enjoyment of the reader mind while focused on the puzzle of it all.

And it's not supposed to be a puzzle!!!! I was adding this extra level of puzzle because of [fill in the blank of insecurities or w/e]; so I had to take a breather, work through it, and then come back to it as a story.

I guess, on some level, I appreciate that those folks made the decision to post it that way, because it was an extra bit of emotional processing that gave me some personal insight separately from the story.

Anyway, that's my ramble about this excellent group project fanfiction. Please do read it, they did some fantastic work!

#there's a *whole separate* 'hey my friends did something cool without me' that I've mostly worked through #and again: NO judgement on the participants #I have already had some lovely conversations with the folks who I consider friends #and also it was a topic in therapy last week 😅 #but I thought this bit about mental approaches to reading was perhaps more widely applicable