#crab asked for this

[nattousan]

i love people's willingness to get hype over dumb shit.

I was driving home today and pull up to a light. As i'm slowing down i 👁️👁️ lock 👁️👁️ eyes with the dude in the car next to me. I spring into action, this is the moment I've been waiting for.

Now, something you must know about me is I drive around with several small plastic 🦀crabs 🦀 on my dashboard, One: for the whimsy of it all and two: on the off chance i encounter another driver who i think could benefit from witnessing them.

This young gentleman was one such someone.

As i pull up, as previously stated, our eyes lock and I hold up one☝️ finger☝️

Perplexed by my unprompted gesticulation, the young man rolls down his window, "what the devil could this perfect stranger be about to tell me?" he might have been thinking.

I present a singular dashboard crab, green and brown, homely but not without its charm.

I study his reaction, grinning encouragingly. He's nodding, obviously intrigued by my plasticine crustacean.

I wag my finger and shake my head, removing the crab from view. Confusion again, but he leans forward, invested. I have him now.

I grab my second dashboard crab, a rotund white and brown crab, easily the most beautiful of my crabs as it sports large discernible claws of an attractive size and silhouette.

✌️ TWO ✌️ i tell him.

He's cheering now, and rightly so, as these are delightful little beasts that anyone would be happy to encounter. But now comes the clincher, time to seal the deal.

My finger wags once more. He's awestruck, I have him completely enraptured. If a car had come and smeared us both into the pavement we would not have noticed, so wrapped up in my display were we.

I bring out my showstopper: a bright pink spider crab with delicately long legs the likes of which had never before nor since been seen in mid afternoon traffic.

As emphatically as i can express, I display all three of my dashboard crabs to this man, three fingers pressed triumphantly to the glass.

the guy is losing it in his car, mouth wide in what i assume to be a primal shout of crab derived excitement. His arms are pumping so vigorously its shaking his stationary vehicle.

We sit there, sharing in a moment of mutual jubilation, and then the light changes, and we move forward in line. He drives off, honking his horn in rapturous exultation,

and we part ways, exactly the same perhaps but changed nonetheless.

🦀

#nat chats #like i tell it very flowery but that's literally what happened #i wanna make a bumper sticker that just says “ask me about my crabs” #just so i can show people #og post

[desolationlesbian]

I am never inclined to make fun of tumblr's cheesy attempts to make money and generally support them even if you consider them cringe. Websites need money to operate and tumblr needs to find a way to make money consistently or it will cease to exist. I do not want tumblr to cease to exist, and the most common alternative method of making money is to collect and sell all of our personal data, which I do not want either. Websites that can support themselves via people willing to spend $25 bucks to commit to a bit is a sign of a brighter and more sustainable version of the internet.

#people are so weirdly averse to the idea of tumblr making money lol #like...websites need money to pay for things. your blog costs money to host and operate #the version of the world u want--where everything is perfectly free always but also never takes your data or asks anything of you #does not and cannot exist unless it's run on donations or something #and if tumblr tried to ask for donations you would eat them alive #so let them sell crabs and blue checks. this is the better universe. i promise

[starhoodies]

friday night pizza night

#soriku #i stole half this joke from hey riddle riddle #so no i dont think dominos actually has crab rangoon but then again ive never asked

[crabsnpersimmons]

eats your clip

oh boy, looks like Clip is on the menu

again

plus a bonus with Bloodmoon!

#ask the crab #fnaf eclipse #bloodmoon #Clip New Do Same You AU #crab art #traditional art #another day another person trying to eat Clip #CHOCO!! HELLO FRIEND! #legit when you sent this all i could think of #was you dancing like you do at the end of your videos #as you drag Clip away #i have no idea how to animate that so i just did a little doodle 😂 #and OF COURSE i had to draw bloodmoon! #i love your design for him he's so FUN! #Bloodmoon and Clip together in the same room... is probably a recipe for disaster

[patrice-bergerons]

Quick FAQ on Tumblr, "Value", and the Proposed Crab Day

Motivation: I see a lot of misinformation circulating on the dash re the proposed crab day and I wanted to offer a simplified and judgement free perspective using core principles of finance.

Q: We keep being told that tumblr's been making nothing but a loss for years, and yet, if it is so unprofitable, then why is no one is shutting the website down? Is it really in need of our money if it's already owned by a multi-billion dollar corporation?

This is in fact not as much of a paradox as it appears to be because "value" in corporate finance terms is a function of present and expected future profits (adjusting for the fact that profits you expect to be earn in the near future are worth a lot more than equivalent profits expected to be earned much later in time).

This means that you can have a company or a product that is currently making a loss (i.e. costing a lot more to run than the income it generates) and it might still be worth some (or a lot of) money as long as you expect it to generate enough profits going forward. Uber for example has been making a loss for years and is still valued at billions of dollars because people think it will eventually generate a lot of profit.

Q: What does all of that mean for tumblr, specifically?

Given how unprofitable tumblr has been historically it's actually a pretty good sign that management has a plan to try and make it profitable because it means they haven't thrown in the towel yet!

But if they fail or if they decide that no matter what they do tumblr will remain unprofitable, then they wouldn't have much business incentive to keep running it. This is why participating in crab day or spending some money on tumblr in general is a good idea, if you can afford it and if tumblr is a service you would like to keep enjoying into the future. And if the answer is no to either of those questions, that's ok too--don't let anyone guilt you on this.

Even more questions-and-answers under the cut! My inbox is also open for any (good faith) questions you might have.

Q: But we all use tumblr religiously--isn't that enough?

Not quite. Tumblr's current state means that the existing userbase is not enough to make the site profitable. For that to change, either the existing userbase needs to become more profitable, or tumblr needs to get a lot more new users--or have a combination of both.

Q: Can crab day really solve all this?

Once again, not quite. A one time cash-injection is not equal to sustainable income, which is what tumblr ultimately needs. This means tumblr will still need to court potential new users and that entails some change to the design and/or the perception of the site. (I love tumblr but guys, if we are real for a second, last time I told my coworkers that, they asked me if I also had a myspace account.)

Q: So why participate then?

Because it will still help. While some change is inevitable and necessary, if we the existing users put our money where our mouth is, it would send a strong signal to management that we value the service they offer and that they should take our preferences into account in designing the site's future also. Also some cash, even if it is a one time deal,

Q: I heard people who came up with the idea are transphobic Christian fundies--do you really want to associate with people like that?

I don't. But who the blogs behind this idea, as people, are has no bearing on the merits of the idea itself.

#crab day #save this hellsite #im gonna say something i never explicitly have #and ask that you rb this if you agree with it #finance is confusing! and the more we get the message across #the better i think #for keeping tumblr around for a long time

[malzykins]

Glue the Jester's lid shut

that won't be necessary 😋

#asks #whats that one crab pic. immobilize #lethal company

[temeyes]

Can I request a merman ghost x soap

Or

Mermen tf 141

soap finds the most dangerous trinkets under the sea, i swear

#ngl i was supposed to draw price as sebastian and gaz as flounder #then obv ghost as prince eric but i keep fucking up price as a crab HSAHSHAHSSA #ALSO I NEVER DREW MERMAIDS BEFORE.. so pls forgive me if their tails look half assed lol!!!! #reactornumber04 #answered asks #my art #2024 #call of duty #call of duty: modern warfare #cod #tf141 #task force 141 #soap cod #ghost cod #price cod #gaz cod

[deep-space-netwerk]

Y'all, I'm getting emotional.

One of my absolute favorite astronomical bodies is the Crab Nebula, or Messier 1. The Crab Nebula is a "planetary nebula", which means it's the enormous, beautiful corpse of a once-giant star. The star that formed the Crab Nebula went supernova and exploded in 1054, and was so bright at the time of its death that you could see it from Earth during the day - for almost a month. For that month, it was brighter than every single thing in the sky except the moon and the sun. Some of you have probably heard of it, or have at least seen this Hubble picture:

But how many of y'all have zoomed in?

Inside all of those lovely rainbow clouds is the supernova remnant - a neutron star. A neutron star is made of the densest possible material that we know of - any denser, and it'd collapse the rest of the way into a full-fledged black hole. Neutron stars are so unimaginably dense that they're not even made of an element, not really. The star at the center of the Crab Nebula is one, single atomic nucleus 12 miles in diameter, made entirely of close-packed neutrons. One teaspoon would weigh 10 million tons. Imagine taking a passenger jet, condensing it down to the size of a mote of dust, and then filling a spoon with that dust. And it spins too - 30 times a second. That spinning causes huge jets of material to eject from the poles at half the speed of light. The incredibly powerful magnetic field traps any stray particles and accelerates them in circular paths through the nebula. Just LOOK at this shit! See the ghosty shadows of the jets, stretching from the top left corner to the bottom right?

But what's really making me lose it is this Hubble timelapse. The star is making ripples. Its moving. Its been dead for almost a thousand years, but its still putting on its final, spectacular show.

It never ceases to amaze me that the things we call "dead" stars are some of the most dynamic, energetic, and awe-inspiring objects in the universe. Normal stars are downright STAGNANT compared to what these so-called "stellar remnants" get up to. Maybe we shouldn't be thinking of them as dead stars, but as the next phase in a star's life. Just as caterpillars "end" their mundane lives and metamorphose into something new and strange and capable of flight, these stars destroy themselves to leave behind something far more exotic, playing at the edge of the laws of physics in ways we still don't fully understand.

#space #crab nebula #neutron star #supernova #god I fucking love neutron stars #ask me sometime about the first pulsar #hubble #spost #space post

[jayrv26]

Dazai fursona

carb

#art #digital art #jayrv26 #bsd #bsd dazai #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #bsd dazai osamu #crab #crabzai #ask

[matrose]

reblog if you love gimli son of gloin

[stamp-it-to-me]

a 1966 Australian stamp depicting a white-spotted hermit crab

[id: a postage stamp with an illustration of a hermit crab. the hermit crab is red with white spots and has a brown and white shell. end id]

#snail mail #stamps #postage #australian #animals #crabs #ask to tag #hermit crabs #mod fave

[cuties-in-codices]

ever seen any crustaceans in manuscript art? if so id love to see :)

yes! cancer (the zodiac sign) is right there in every illustrated astrological manuscript, in calendars etc... so here are some medieval crabs & lobsters:

(it was only through this ask that i became consciously aware of the fact that cancer is most often depicted as a lobster, not as a crab, in medieval illustrations. i am very much not a biologist)

sources: Berlin, SBB, Ms. germ. fol. 244, fol. 49v // Oxford, Bodleian Library, MS. Auct. D. inf. 2. 11, fol. 6r // Tübingen, Universitätsbibliothek, Md 2, fol. 78r // Zurich, Zentralbibl., Ms. C 54, fol. 20r // Paris, Bibl. de l'Arsenal, Ms-1036 réserve, fol. 23r

#zodiac signs #astrology #astronomy #constellations #cancer #crabs #lobsters #crustaceans #medieval art #ask

[chunkfunkgunk-offishal]

not sure how to submit but anyway, opinions on horseshoe crabs??

Today on CHUNK! FUNK! GUNK! We rate

the HORSESHOE CRAB:

2/10 Chunk

10/10 Funk

0/10 Gunk

Horseshoe crab!! I love them! I see them (their molted shells) a lot on the beaches in Massachusetts and have gotten to see them crawling around in the water a few times before too! I love their weird little crab feet. They may be mostly shell, but their shell looks chunky so they can get a little chunk, as a treat. They’re so cool and unique, maximum funk. From my experience touching them, very dry. No gunk.

Overall: 9/10

So good and cute and wonderful and funky

#horseshoe crab #chunk funk gunk #chunk #funk #gunk #ocean #ocean animals #crab #cool fish #fish #ocean fish #asks open #marine life #cool critter #lil guy #wonderful shelled creature

[stealingpotatoes]

I love how, whenever anyone tries to categorize the Last 4 Jedi, it is something like this; child soldier and Padawan of the chosen one, the guy who blew up the death star and son of the chosen one, that one guy(Cal), and that other guy(Ezra).

i mean in ezra's defence he had been a missing person for like, 10-12 years

#while luke was blowing up the death star and defeating the sith ezra was on the sesh w the hermit crab lads #thanks for the ask!

[crabsnpersimmons]

i like to tuck my sun and moon into bed when i get out of it, but after seeing your chibi sun and moon, i think of them every time i do now hehe!!

ohhhhh this is precious! thank you for sharing with me! blowing them kisses!! sleep well, little plushies ❤️❤️❤️

the minute i saw your photo i dropped everything to draw this:

shhh

they eepy

#fnaf sun #fnaf moon #fnaf dca #dca fandom #Rain or Shine AU #crab art #traditional art #ask the crab #please share photos of your DCA plushies or figurines or art or literally anything #this made my day #the Chibi Sun and Moon are inseparable #they always sleep together #Moon is of course the one to notice when it's time to get ready for bed and has to pull Sunny along #and their Y/N tucks them in #gives them both a good night kiss #turns on the night light for Sunny #and plays the music box for Moony #this makes me wanna get Sun and Moon plushies #it's been raining all day so i imagine they had a LONG day playing in the rain #so they eepy #so so eepy #let them rest #tomorrow they will play again #but tonight they will rest

[intotheelliwoods]

WOE, CRAB BE UPON YE

@melna904-blog FRIENDS!

#ok listen #technically in my time #its still crab dayso ha. #asks